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ALL: Road trip!
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00:00:03,164 --> 00:00:04,030
NICK: See you guys.
3
00:00:04,098 --> 00:00:04,898
JESS: Have a good time.
4
00:00:04,965 --> 00:00:06,066
SCHMIDT: Let's go.
5
00:00:06,133 --> 00:00:07,467
We're just gonna have a chill day in.
6
00:00:07,535 --> 00:00:09,035
- WINSTON: Road trip!
- NICK: Yeah!
7
00:00:09,103 --> 00:00:10,670
I said, "Chill day in..."
8
00:00:11,772 --> 00:00:13,073
but did I mean it?
9
00:00:13,140 --> 00:00:14,541
[laughs]
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00:00:14,608 --> 00:00:16,209
Wait, I thought we were
having a chill day.
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00:00:16,277 --> 00:00:17,877
Oh... we are...
12
00:00:17,945 --> 00:00:19,679
Oh, good... not.
13
00:00:19,747 --> 00:00:20,747
Welcome to
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00:00:20,815 --> 00:00:22,749
your bachelorette party 2.0.
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00:00:22,817 --> 00:00:24,084
I got...
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00:00:24,151 --> 00:00:25,385
- the nail polish.
- Mm.
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00:00:25,453 --> 00:00:27,420
- I got comfy socks.
- Okay.
18
00:00:27,488 --> 00:00:30,190
I have Canadian Broadcast Television's
19
00:00:30,257 --> 00:00:31,357
1985 masterpiece,
20
00:00:31,425 --> 00:00:33,359
Anne of Green Gables.
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00:00:33,427 --> 00:00:34,360
Good ol' A.G.G.
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00:00:34,428 --> 00:00:35,361
But, oh, wait...
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00:00:35,429 --> 00:00:37,097
who invited this
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00:00:37,164 --> 00:00:39,199
little green chimney?
25
00:00:40,201 --> 00:00:41,134
I-it's a bong.
26
00:00:41,202 --> 00:00:42,035
Yeah.
27
00:00:42,103 --> 00:00:44,388
Oh, scoot, once every ten years,
28
00:00:44,389 --> 00:00:45,865
Jessica Day likes to partake
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00:00:45,865 --> 00:00:49,201
in what the Native
Americans call cannabis.
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00:00:49,268 --> 00:00:50,235
- That's Latin.
- I like to call it
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00:00:50,303 --> 00:00:51,303
Giggle Dirt.
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00:00:51,370 --> 00:00:52,671
You know, we really don't
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00:00:52,738 --> 00:00:54,005
have to do this, because every time
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00:00:54,073 --> 00:00:55,674
you smoke weed you almost die.
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00:00:55,741 --> 00:00:58,176
I'm gonna Jackass into these melons!
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00:00:58,244 --> 00:00:59,277
Ah...
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00:00:59,345 --> 00:01:00,779
Ah...
38
00:01:00,846 --> 00:01:02,781
Return of the mack
39
00:01:02,848 --> 00:01:03,782
Oh, my God
40
00:01:03,849 --> 00:01:05,350
Return of high Jess
41
00:01:05,418 --> 00:01:06,284
Here I am
42
00:01:06,352 --> 00:01:07,452
Return of high Jess
43
00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:08,520
Once again
44
00:01:08,588 --> 00:01:10,622
-
Return of the mack
- [whoops]
45
00:01:10,690 --> 00:01:12,123
Top of the world
46
00:01:12,191 --> 00:01:13,458
Return of the mack, watch my flow...
47
00:01:13,526 --> 00:01:14,960
Anne Shirley...
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00:01:16,862 --> 00:01:18,296
what in heck are you doing?
49
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Fishing for lake trout.
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- Hey.
- Hmm?
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- GILBERT: For lake trout?
- Remember Coach?
52
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- [laughing]:
- Oh, yeah.
53
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Where is he?
54
00:01:29,675 --> 00:01:31,910
55
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Anne, wait, wait a minute.
56
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I was just down at the post office
57
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- to see if the Queens results...
- Like, why...
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00:01:38,684 --> 00:01:39,918
like, why...
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00:01:39,986 --> 00:01:42,020
like why are Gilbert's lips so sexual?
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00:01:42,088 --> 00:01:45,624
Wait a minute, you ninny,
we tied for first place,
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- you and I.
- Man, I...
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00:01:47,159 --> 00:01:49,361
I-I love Schmidt,
you know I love Schmidt,
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00:01:49,428 --> 00:01:51,696
but I would throw it
all away for Gilbert.
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00:01:51,764 --> 00:01:54,032
I would just ruin my life to that boy.
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00:01:54,100 --> 00:01:55,867
I'm just sorry you
had to share it with me.
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00:01:55,935 --> 00:01:57,869
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
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00:01:57,937 --> 00:01:59,104
Wait a minute.
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00:01:59,171 --> 00:02:00,772
The very fact that socks exist
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00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:03,241
is proof that shoes don't work.
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00:02:03,309 --> 00:02:04,676
Oh, my God, I... my hearing is,
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00:02:04,744 --> 00:02:06,745
like, so good without my glasses on.
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00:02:06,812 --> 00:02:08,013
I'm, like...
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00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:10,682
a super hear-o.
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00:02:10,750 --> 00:02:11,616
Just...
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00:02:11,684 --> 00:02:12,617
eating up sounds
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00:02:12,685 --> 00:02:13,852
with my ear mouths.
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Oh, my God, oh, my God,
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00:02:15,588 --> 00:02:17,188
oh, my God, oh, my God.
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00:02:17,256 --> 00:02:20,458
Oh, my God, wait till you try that.
80
00:02:20,526 --> 00:02:22,427
- Okay.
- Put them on.
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00:02:22,495 --> 00:02:25,530
It's like my hearing is,
like, what a dog hears.
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ANNE: and I was calmly waiting for it.
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I can hear the TV.
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I can hear the TV.
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I can hear the TV.
86
00:02:32,471 --> 00:02:33,905
- [sighs]
- Man.
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00:02:33,973 --> 00:02:35,073
Oh, my God.
88
00:02:35,141 --> 00:02:36,474
Okay, this stuff is really strong.
89
00:02:36,542 --> 00:02:38,476
Where did you get it?
90
00:02:38,544 --> 00:02:40,345
I know people...
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00:02:40,413 --> 00:02:42,180
through you.
92
00:02:42,248 --> 00:02:45,684
So, it's just gonna be me
and Cece, uh, but I want to,
93
00:02:45,751 --> 00:02:47,585
you know, throw a little...
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00:02:47,653 --> 00:02:49,487
gasoline on the fire,
if you know what I mean.
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00:02:49,555 --> 00:02:52,757
I have Russian nesting doll.
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00:02:52,825 --> 00:02:53,925
Uh-oh.
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00:02:55,161 --> 00:02:55,927
It's grenade.
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00:02:55,995 --> 00:02:57,028
Just looking for
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00:02:57,096 --> 00:02:58,863
a little weed, Nadia.
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00:02:58,931 --> 00:03:00,799
And what the heck, throw in
that bag of kettle corn, too.
101
00:03:03,769 --> 00:03:05,737
[laughs]
102
00:03:05,805 --> 00:03:07,906
[knocking on door]
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00:03:09,408 --> 00:03:10,342
Oh, scoot!
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00:03:10,409 --> 00:03:11,910
You got me a stripper?!
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00:03:11,977 --> 00:03:13,920
So, uh, you want me to
sign my package, or...
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00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:14,854
Wait, I think
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00:03:14,921 --> 00:03:16,147
- he's just a...
- A man...
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00:03:16,148 --> 00:03:18,148
trying to do my job for
the U.S. Postal Service,
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not a stripper.
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00:03:19,316 --> 00:03:20,417
Yes, I dance.
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00:03:20,484 --> 00:03:22,152
Yes, I'm sexy...
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00:03:22,219 --> 00:03:23,420
but I don't do it professionally.
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00:03:23,487 --> 00:03:24,821
Now, could you please just sign here?
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Your calves look like a snake
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swallowed a bag of ropes.
You know that, right?
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I'm sorry for my friend
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00:03:29,226 --> 00:03:30,493
objectifying you,
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00:03:30,561 --> 00:03:33,830
but in her defense,
you are fine as hell.
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Fine as hell!
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I know you're not a stripper,
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00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:37,400
but is there any way you could
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00:03:37,468 --> 00:03:38,435
just take your short pants off?
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00:03:38,502 --> 00:03:39,469
Mm-hmm.
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00:03:39,537 --> 00:03:40,537
- [chuckles]
- Have a nice day.
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Om, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom,
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- nom, nom, nom.
- Nom, nom, nom.
127
00:03:42,840 --> 00:03:44,374
- Sorry.
- Very sorry.
128
00:03:44,442 --> 00:03:45,809
- Sorry, sorry.
- But we are not sorry about that.
129
00:03:45,876 --> 00:03:47,710
- Keep walking away there!
- Oh, keep... slow...
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00:03:47,778 --> 00:03:49,446
- it down there for a second.
- [whooping]
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00:03:49,513 --> 00:03:50,447
- Ay-ay-ay.
- Ooh...
132
00:03:50,514 --> 00:03:51,881
[yelling grito]
133
00:03:51,949 --> 00:03:52,782
[both catcalling]
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00:03:52,850 --> 00:03:54,651
- Smack that! Sorry.
- Ooh.
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00:03:54,718 --> 00:03:56,886
[grunts]
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00:03:56,954 --> 00:03:58,054
I think this is
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00:03:58,122 --> 00:03:59,756
a gift from our registry.
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00:03:59,824 --> 00:04:01,157
Wait, don't open it!
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00:04:01,225 --> 00:04:02,492
What if I-inside of it
140
00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:05,061
is us, but we're older?
141
00:04:05,129 --> 00:04:06,830
I've no clue what this is.
142
00:04:06,897 --> 00:04:09,199
You know, Schmidt handled
everything from the registry.
143
00:04:10,301 --> 00:04:11,601
- [scanner beeping]
- Crockpot!
144
00:04:11,669 --> 00:04:12,802
Kettle, kettle!
145
00:04:12,870 --> 00:04:13,803
Espresso maker!
146
00:04:13,871 --> 00:04:14,771
Trivet!
147
00:04:14,839 --> 00:04:16,372
Melon baller!
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00:04:17,508 --> 00:04:20,043
It's a bread maker?
149
00:04:20,110 --> 00:04:21,144
From...
150
00:04:21,212 --> 00:04:22,712
oh, from Schmidt's mom.
151
00:04:22,780 --> 00:04:26,549
"Cece, this bread maker
couldn't be easier to use."
152
00:04:26,617 --> 00:04:28,051
"It has one button."
153
00:04:28,118 --> 00:04:30,453
"Even you can do it with a few tries."
154
00:04:30,521 --> 00:04:33,223
"Ha, ha, Louise."
155
00:04:33,290 --> 00:04:35,558
What does that mean?!
156
00:04:36,220 --> 00:04:37,987
Oh, no.
157
00:04:38,055 --> 00:04:38,988
She...
158
00:04:39,056 --> 00:04:40,657
Oh, no!
159
00:04:40,724 --> 00:04:41,925
I mean, is she trying to say
160
00:04:41,992 --> 00:04:44,108
that I can't even push one button?
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00:04:44,109 --> 00:04:46,042
She doesn't think that I can take care
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00:04:46,110 --> 00:04:47,877
of her precious, little boy.
163
00:04:47,945 --> 00:04:49,212
She doesn't like that Schmidt does
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00:04:49,279 --> 00:04:50,346
- all the cooking...
- Hold up,
165
00:04:50,414 --> 00:04:52,815
hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up.
166
00:04:52,883 --> 00:04:54,817
This simple bitch
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00:04:54,885 --> 00:04:56,185
wants you to be some kind of
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00:04:56,253 --> 00:04:57,320
June Cleaver, Betty Draper,
169
00:04:57,388 --> 00:04:59,255
Carol Brady wifey?!
170
00:04:59,323 --> 00:05:00,089
- Mm-mm.
- It is the
171
00:05:00,157 --> 00:05:01,357
- 21st century!
- Uh-huh.
172
00:05:01,425 --> 00:05:02,692
Fifth generation feminism!
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00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:04,360
- Keep going.
- Work-life balance!
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00:05:04,428 --> 00:05:05,328
- We need to rise up.
- Yeah!
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00:05:05,396 --> 00:05:08,431
22% less pay for the same job?!
176
00:05:08,499 --> 00:05:09,599
Don't tell me what to wax!
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00:05:09,666 --> 00:05:11,267
Sideburn where my thigh turn.
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00:05:11,335 --> 00:05:12,702
You know what we need
to do to this thing?!
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00:05:12,770 --> 00:05:13,669
Bake bread in it!
180
00:05:13,737 --> 00:05:15,605
Wait, wait, wait!
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00:05:15,672 --> 00:05:16,639
What, what?!
182
00:05:19,042 --> 00:05:21,144
You'll do a lot more damage with this.
183
00:05:21,211 --> 00:05:22,211
This is why I love you.
184
00:05:24,114 --> 00:05:26,149
Homemade bread's for Europeans!
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00:05:26,216 --> 00:05:27,216
- That's right!
- Yeah!
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00:05:27,284 --> 00:05:28,217
U.S.A.!
187
00:05:28,285 --> 00:05:30,920
BOTH: U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
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00:05:30,988 --> 00:05:34,257
Oh, my God, I just realized
some day I'm gonna have
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00:05:34,324 --> 00:05:36,893
to speak at my mother's funeral.
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00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:38,394
Wow.
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00:05:39,607 --> 00:05:41,908
- U.S.A.!
- U.S.A.!
192
00:05:41,976 --> 00:05:42,669
- [phone ringing]
- U.S.A.! - U.S.A.!
193
00:05:42,669 --> 00:05:43,283
Oh, wait... hey!
194
00:05:43,284 --> 00:05:45,053
We're coming up on
the rental place right now.
195
00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:46,454
I just got an e-mail notification
196
00:05:46,522 --> 00:05:48,623
that our first wedding gift has arrived.
197
00:05:49,636 --> 00:05:50,713
Oh, y-you did?
198
00:05:50,714 --> 00:05:51,718
Spoiler alert,
199
00:05:51,719 --> 00:05:54,053
- it's a bread maker.
- Bread maker.
200
00:05:54,121 --> 00:05:55,321
Cece, do me a favor and bring it inside.
201
00:05:55,389 --> 00:05:56,223
It's in the hallway right now.
202
00:05:56,223 --> 00:05:57,356
Yeah, I'll-I'll go...
203
00:05:57,424 --> 00:05:58,657
I'll go get the... the bread maker
204
00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:00,526
and bring it inside, in one piece,
205
00:06:00,594 --> 00:06:01,594
safe and sound.
206
00:06:01,661 --> 00:06:02,695
I love you so much, I got to go.
207
00:06:02,762 --> 00:06:04,196
SCHMIDT, NICK, WINSTON: Bread maker!
208
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:06,031
[phone beeps off]
209
00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:07,867
This was shipped like this
210
00:06:07,934 --> 00:06:10,035
so we are gonna need a new one.
211
00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:11,889
You obviously broke this yourself.
212
00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:12,855
Uh...
213
00:06:12,916 --> 00:06:13,295
[laughs]
214
00:06:13,296 --> 00:06:15,334
You obviously broke it yourself.
215
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:16,294
Yup.
216
00:06:16,361 --> 00:06:17,461
- No.
- [Jess laughs]
217
00:06:17,529 --> 00:06:18,297
You crushed it with your mind.
218
00:06:18,298 --> 00:06:20,196
- Okay, you're calling me a witch?
- No, no, no,
219
00:06:20,222 --> 00:06:22,556
- a sorceress,
- A sorceress.
220
00:06:22,624 --> 00:06:23,691
You just have magical powers,
221
00:06:23,759 --> 00:06:24,769
you don't like...
222
00:06:24,795 --> 00:06:26,262
I don't know how I can help you today.
223
00:06:26,304 --> 00:06:27,237
It's like that episode of...
224
00:06:27,305 --> 00:06:28,238
remember that episode?
225
00:06:28,306 --> 00:06:29,273
Yeah.
226
00:06:29,341 --> 00:06:30,574
Of that... yeah.
227
00:06:30,642 --> 00:06:31,609
[sighs]
228
00:06:37,349 --> 00:06:38,449
So...
229
00:06:38,516 --> 00:06:40,250
Okay, so, like, um...
230
00:06:40,318 --> 00:06:42,586
how-how much would it...
would it be to replace it?
231
00:06:43,688 --> 00:06:45,556
It's $1,200.
232
00:06:48,326 --> 00:06:50,894
Is there a store in the mall
233
00:06:50,962 --> 00:06:55,532
that sells $1,200 for, like, $50?
234
00:06:57,205 --> 00:06:59,654
How is this thing so expensive?
235
00:07:00,195 --> 00:07:02,396
JESS: Aly!
236
00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:04,007
What are you doing here?
237
00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:04,855
Seriously?
238
00:07:04,856 --> 00:07:07,355
We just had this conversation
outside the mall.
239
00:07:07,355 --> 00:07:08,422
- Hey.
- JESS: Aly!
240
00:07:08,490 --> 00:07:09,307
What are you doing here?
241
00:07:09,307 --> 00:07:10,775
You don't... remember that?
242
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:12,929
No, no, I do, I do.
243
00:07:13,047 --> 00:07:14,815
- You don't, do you?
- I don't.
244
00:07:14,883 --> 00:07:15,916
[Jess laughs]
245
00:07:15,984 --> 00:07:17,484
- I don't.
- I do.
246
00:07:17,552 --> 00:07:18,747
- Really?
- No.
247
00:07:18,747 --> 00:07:18,988
Okay.
248
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,601
It's Cece's bachelorette party.
249
00:07:20,644 --> 00:07:22,545
Yeah...
250
00:07:22,612 --> 00:07:24,480
It's Cece's bachelorette party.
251
00:07:24,548 --> 00:07:25,648
Oh, yeah.
252
00:07:25,715 --> 00:07:26,916
- You do remember it?
- No. [laughs]
253
00:07:26,983 --> 00:07:27,750
Don't remember it?
254
00:07:27,817 --> 00:07:28,884
- Mm-mm.
- Anyway...
255
00:07:28,952 --> 00:07:30,452
this is my super
256
00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:32,121
present boyfriend, Tripp.
257
00:07:32,188 --> 00:07:33,088
I'm sorry,
258
00:07:33,156 --> 00:07:34,056
he's dealing with a very
259
00:07:34,124 --> 00:07:35,257
important work crisis
260
00:07:35,325 --> 00:07:37,393
right now, since he's an agent
261
00:07:37,460 --> 00:07:38,961
for animal actors.
262
00:07:39,029 --> 00:07:40,462
Fine, fine!
263
00:07:40,530 --> 00:07:41,964
Hire Colonel Fantastic
instead of Maurice.
264
00:07:42,032 --> 00:07:43,566
You want to walk onto
Alfonso Cuar?n's set
265
00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:45,690
and tell him that
he lost his lead otter,
266
00:07:45,757 --> 00:07:47,225
be my-be my guest, okay.
267
00:07:47,292 --> 00:07:48,759
Who's gonna get her in the
water with Naomi Watts?
268
00:07:48,827 --> 00:07:50,261
Colonel Fantastic?
269
00:07:50,329 --> 00:07:51,646
Yeah, right.
270
00:07:51,647 --> 00:07:53,718
It's my fifth year
anniversary of being a cop
271
00:07:53,744 --> 00:07:55,645
and he's supposed to make me dinner...
272
00:07:55,712 --> 00:07:57,546
if he ever gets off the phone.
273
00:07:57,614 --> 00:07:58,814
Hey, babe,
274
00:07:58,882 --> 00:08:00,316
I need a left-handed spatula, okay?
275
00:08:00,384 --> 00:08:01,984
Don't tell me it's not
a thing; it's a thing.
276
00:08:03,086 --> 00:08:05,021
Soul mates do exist.
277
00:08:05,088 --> 00:08:06,022
[laughs]
278
00:08:06,089 --> 00:08:07,023
What a wang.
279
00:08:07,090 --> 00:08:08,190
[both chuckle]
280
00:08:08,258 --> 00:08:09,191
- You know what?
- Hmm?
281
00:08:09,259 --> 00:08:10,359
[gasps]
282
00:08:10,427 --> 00:08:11,794
I'm gonna tell Aly that
283
00:08:11,862 --> 00:08:13,462
Winston's in love with her!
284
00:08:13,530 --> 00:08:14,864
No, Winston would kill you.
285
00:08:14,931 --> 00:08:16,332
Okay, I'll just text Winston
286
00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:18,034
and I'll get him up to speed
287
00:08:18,101 --> 00:08:19,135
on Aly and Tripp.
288
00:08:21,938 --> 00:08:24,340
[humming]: Nailed it.
289
00:08:24,408 --> 00:08:25,675
Excuse me, are you actually
290
00:08:25,742 --> 00:08:26,676
gonna buy something?
291
00:08:26,743 --> 00:08:27,877
Yeah, we need to buy another
292
00:08:27,944 --> 00:08:29,211
bread maker, 'cause you claim
293
00:08:29,279 --> 00:08:31,514
we "destroyed" this one "with a stick."
294
00:08:31,581 --> 00:08:33,315
I never said stick
and we're out of stock.
295
00:08:33,383 --> 00:08:35,051
Well, maybe that's what you said.
296
00:08:35,118 --> 00:08:36,919
You destroyed this thing with the stock.
297
00:08:36,987 --> 00:08:37,920
Is that what you did?
298
00:08:37,988 --> 00:08:38,921
You beat this with a stick?
299
00:08:38,989 --> 00:08:41,090
No, I didn't, I said you said...
300
00:08:41,158 --> 00:08:42,925
- you said stick.
- But I didn't say stick.
301
00:08:42,993 --> 00:08:43,859
I never said stick.
302
00:08:43,927 --> 00:08:44,760
I don't even have a stick.
303
00:08:44,828 --> 00:08:46,162
I live downtown.
304
00:08:46,229 --> 00:08:48,030
Well, we're-we're out of stock, so...
305
00:08:48,098 --> 00:08:49,098
But you-you have one right there.
306
00:08:49,166 --> 00:08:50,032
- [gasps]
- Oh...
307
00:08:50,100 --> 00:08:51,434
that's the floor model.
308
00:08:51,501 --> 00:08:52,768
- Can't sell the floor model.
- Yes, you...
309
00:08:52,836 --> 00:08:54,067
- it's right there.
- It's right there.
310
00:08:54,093 --> 00:08:56,333
We need it to sell other bread makers.
311
00:08:56,334 --> 00:08:56,936
You just said
312
00:08:56,936 --> 00:08:58,570
you don't have other bread makers.
313
00:08:58,638 --> 00:08:59,471
I don't make the rules.
314
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:00,772
Who makes the rules?
315
00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:02,440
Derek.
316
00:09:02,508 --> 00:09:03,742
[inhaling]
317
00:09:03,810 --> 00:09:05,143
- Definitely too high
- No, I cannot deal
318
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:07,612
- to talk to Derek.
- with Derek right now.
319
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,183
Okay, I have a really
good plan, all right?
320
00:09:11,250 --> 00:09:13,451
We just leave this here
321
00:09:13,519 --> 00:09:15,187
and then we go do something different.
322
00:09:15,254 --> 00:09:17,189
Jessica, that is the first thing
323
00:09:17,256 --> 00:09:19,292
that Schmidt and I own
together and I ruined it.
324
00:09:19,293 --> 00:09:20,693
I have to do something.
325
00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:22,462
I have to replace it.
326
00:09:22,530 --> 00:09:23,797
[sighs]
327
00:09:23,864 --> 00:09:25,632
Okay.
328
00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:36,076
MAN:
Feel like baking love
329
00:09:37,211 --> 00:09:39,813
Feel like baking love
330
00:09:43,084 --> 00:09:44,017
What?
331
00:09:44,085 --> 00:09:47,120
How does it know we're here?
332
00:09:47,188 --> 00:09:49,756
Feel like baking love...
333
00:09:49,824 --> 00:09:51,024
- What's happening?
-
Feel like
334
00:09:51,092 --> 00:09:52,692
F-feel like baking
335
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:55,195
Feel like baking love
336
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:56,663
[whispering]: Psst! Hey...
337
00:09:56,731 --> 00:09:58,164
Feel like baking love
338
00:09:58,232 --> 00:09:59,199
Feel like-feel like
339
00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:01,101
Snap out of it, snap out of it.
340
00:10:01,168 --> 00:10:02,936
Feel like baking love, feel like
341
00:10:03,004 --> 00:10:05,472
- Get down. Snap out of it.
-
Feel like... feel like baking love
342
00:10:05,539 --> 00:10:08,141
343
00:10:08,209 --> 00:10:09,876
[sighs]
344
00:10:09,944 --> 00:10:12,212
[grunts] Get this puppy...
345
00:10:23,491 --> 00:10:24,924
[clattering]
346
00:10:24,992 --> 00:10:26,259
Feel like baking love
347
00:10:26,327 --> 00:10:28,361
348
00:10:28,429 --> 00:10:30,196
Should we get snacks?
349
00:10:32,099 --> 00:10:34,601
Feel like baking love
350
00:10:36,303 --> 00:10:38,538
Feel like baking love
351
00:10:38,606 --> 00:10:39,939
Feel like baking love
352
00:10:40,007 --> 00:10:41,408
[whispering]: Go, go!
353
00:10:42,843 --> 00:10:45,045
No, he won't wear glasses.
354
00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,446
Uh, because he's not
355
00:10:46,514 --> 00:10:48,248
a library owl, he's a horror movie owl.
356
00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:49,649
Look,
357
00:10:49,717 --> 00:10:51,618
we're gonna do your cop
dinner thing tomorrow.
358
00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:52,647
[sighs]
359
00:10:52,647 --> 00:10:55,611
Yeah, this is just how I wanted
to celebrate a major milestone.
360
00:10:55,612 --> 00:10:57,478
[gasps] What's happening there?
361
00:10:57,546 --> 00:10:58,131
Forget it, okay? Just go.
362
00:10:58,132 --> 00:10:59,166
And I hope your owl
363
00:10:59,233 --> 00:11:00,701
chokes on a mouse.
364
00:11:00,768 --> 00:11:03,270
That is so mean.
365
00:11:03,337 --> 00:11:04,337
I've seen that happen.
366
00:11:05,673 --> 00:11:07,274
[gasps] Did they just break up?
367
00:11:07,341 --> 00:11:08,742
This is huge for Winston.
368
00:11:08,810 --> 00:11:11,078
What are you... what... Hey, Jess, move.
369
00:11:11,145 --> 00:11:12,412
Jess, move, come on. Keep moving.
370
00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:14,414
Keep moving, keep moving, keep moving.
371
00:11:14,482 --> 00:11:16,750
Let's go, let's go, let's go,
let's go, let's go, let's go.
372
00:11:16,818 --> 00:11:17,751
Almost there, almost there.
373
00:11:17,819 --> 00:11:18,752
- ALY: Ugh.
- Oh!
374
00:11:18,820 --> 00:11:19,953
Tripp just took off.
375
00:11:20,021 --> 00:11:21,121
What, uh...
376
00:11:21,189 --> 00:11:22,989
are... what are you guys doing?
377
00:11:23,057 --> 00:11:24,658
- BOTH: Nothing.
- Do you need help with that box?
378
00:11:24,726 --> 00:11:25,592
- Nope.
- No, we're good.
379
00:11:25,660 --> 00:11:26,626
It looks heavy, I can help you.
380
00:11:26,694 --> 00:11:27,994
No, you don't want to get involved,
381
00:11:28,062 --> 00:11:29,096
- trust me.
- Please, don't make me say it.
382
00:11:29,163 --> 00:11:30,964
Fine, I'll say it.
383
00:11:31,032 --> 00:11:33,667
I don't really want to be
alone right now, and so...
384
00:11:33,735 --> 00:11:36,336
can I please just... like,
come help you guys
385
00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:37,471
make bread or whatever?
386
00:11:37,538 --> 00:11:39,005
Aw, of course, yeah. Let's go.
387
00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:40,140
Got to go quickly, got to go quickly.
388
00:11:40,208 --> 00:11:41,141
Yeah, yeah, let's go, let's go.
389
00:11:41,209 --> 00:11:42,776
Did you trash the display?
390
00:11:43,580 --> 00:11:45,581
Is that a stolen floor model?
391
00:11:45,648 --> 00:11:46,599
Back off!
392
00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:48,700
Do these ladies look like
shoplifters to you?
393
00:11:50,436 --> 00:11:53,037
Oh, no.
394
00:11:53,105 --> 00:11:54,305
What are you doing?
395
00:11:54,373 --> 00:11:55,673
This isn't how you handcuff people.
396
00:11:55,741 --> 00:11:56,674
It's mall jail.
397
00:11:56,742 --> 00:11:57,742
I only have two handcuffs.
398
00:11:57,810 --> 00:11:58,843
I'm an actual cop.
399
00:11:58,911 --> 00:11:59,844
[laughing]: Yeah, right.
400
00:11:59,912 --> 00:12:01,012
I'm a cop!
401
00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:02,447
For the love of mack daddy,
402
00:12:02,515 --> 00:12:04,182
- why can't you be cool?
- Shut it!
403
00:12:04,250 --> 00:12:05,216
You're in my house now.
404
00:12:05,284 --> 00:12:06,951
Calm down, sir, your house is clearly
405
00:12:07,019 --> 00:12:08,186
a lost and found.
406
00:12:08,254 --> 00:12:10,188
JESS: And it's all just baby shoes...
407
00:12:10,256 --> 00:12:11,689
and babies don't even need shoes.
408
00:12:11,757 --> 00:12:13,792
Why not put that money
towards something worthwhile
409
00:12:13,859 --> 00:12:15,794
like a cute hat or a raincoat?
410
00:12:15,861 --> 00:12:17,695
[laughing]: A baby in a raincoat.
411
00:12:17,763 --> 00:12:20,031
It's like... just like a...
412
00:12:20,099 --> 00:12:21,966
a little baby meteorologist.
413
00:12:22,034 --> 00:12:23,168
[laughs]
414
00:12:23,235 --> 00:12:24,669
Hey, so, it's this simple, okay.
415
00:12:24,737 --> 00:12:26,004
We wanted to pay for the bread maker,
416
00:12:26,071 --> 00:12:27,372
but they wouldn't let us pay for it
417
00:12:27,439 --> 00:12:28,706
because it was a floor model,
418
00:12:28,774 --> 00:12:30,408
so we had a plan... I don't care.
419
00:12:32,745 --> 00:12:34,712
[laughs] [lock clicks]
420
00:12:34,780 --> 00:12:35,914
[laughs]
421
00:12:35,981 --> 00:12:37,582
Baby in a raincoat.
422
00:12:37,650 --> 00:12:38,683
[Jess laughing]
423
00:12:40,254 --> 00:12:42,241
This is bad, you guys.
This is really bad!
424
00:12:42,242 --> 00:12:43,242
He's gonna call the real cops
425
00:12:43,311 --> 00:12:44,678
and I'm gonna be in so much trouble.
426
00:12:44,746 --> 00:12:46,346
I could lose my job...
427
00:12:46,414 --> 00:12:47,814
or worse...
428
00:12:47,882 --> 00:12:48,849
[gasps]
429
00:12:48,916 --> 00:12:50,317
They put me on train duty.
430
00:12:50,385 --> 00:12:52,352
I'm so sorry we got you
in this situation, okay.
431
00:12:52,420 --> 00:12:54,121
I am so sorry, too.
432
00:12:54,188 --> 00:12:55,522
Okay, how do we get out of here?
433
00:12:55,590 --> 00:12:57,224
How, how? Before the cops come.
434
00:12:57,291 --> 00:12:58,258
Oh!
435
00:12:58,326 --> 00:12:59,993
Yes, okay, guys,
436
00:13:00,061 --> 00:13:01,795
here's how we get out of here.
437
00:13:01,863 --> 00:13:03,964
We dress up in the clothes
from the lost and found,
438
00:13:04,032 --> 00:13:05,766
and we start crying,
439
00:13:05,833 --> 00:13:08,635
and then he comes back in and
he's like, "Where are the girls?"
440
00:13:08,703 --> 00:13:11,338
This is just babies in here."
441
00:13:11,406 --> 00:13:12,739
You're incredibly high.
442
00:13:12,807 --> 00:13:14,675
No.
443
00:13:14,742 --> 00:13:16,309
- Yeah.
- No.
444
00:13:16,377 --> 00:13:18,011
- Mm-hmm.
- No. No.
445
00:13:18,079 --> 00:13:19,646
- Yeah.
- Who?
446
00:13:19,714 --> 00:13:21,682
- You. You, babe.
- How did you know?
447
00:13:21,749 --> 00:13:23,450
Oh, I knew from the
first second I saw you.
448
00:13:23,518 --> 00:13:24,985
Like, literally the first second.
449
00:13:25,053 --> 00:13:26,653
Okay, ideas, you, go.
450
00:13:26,721 --> 00:13:29,460
Oh, no, no, no, I am not
giving you any ideas
451
00:13:29,486 --> 00:13:32,255
because it was my idea
that got us into this mess
452
00:13:32,323 --> 00:13:33,489
in the first place.
453
00:13:33,557 --> 00:13:35,158
First...
454
00:13:35,225 --> 00:13:38,294
I bashed Schmidt's $1,200 bread maker.
455
00:13:38,362 --> 00:13:39,595
- $1,200?
- Yeah.
456
00:13:39,663 --> 00:13:41,264
- For a bread maker?
- I know.
457
00:13:41,332 --> 00:13:43,499
That's a lot of dough.
458
00:13:45,736 --> 00:13:47,003
I'm trying to wink.
459
00:13:47,071 --> 00:13:48,171
Am I winking?
460
00:13:48,238 --> 00:13:50,606
Then I got my best friend here
461
00:13:50,674 --> 00:13:52,008
to commit a crime,
462
00:13:52,076 --> 00:13:55,144
and now you might have... train duty?
463
00:13:55,212 --> 00:13:57,547
It's like marathon duty
but without the hot guys
464
00:13:57,614 --> 00:13:58,781
pooping their pants.
465
00:13:58,849 --> 00:14:00,283
What does that say about me
466
00:14:00,351 --> 00:14:03,753
if I can't even take care
of a bread maker?
467
00:14:03,821 --> 00:14:05,254
What if Louise was right?
468
00:14:05,322 --> 00:14:07,423
What if I can't take care of Schmidt?
469
00:14:07,491 --> 00:14:10,326
How can you say you don't
take care of people?
470
00:14:10,394 --> 00:14:13,162
You've been taking care
of me my entire life.
471
00:14:13,230 --> 00:14:14,831
You're fierce and you are strong,
472
00:14:14,898 --> 00:14:18,634
and you would stand up
for anyone that you love.
473
00:14:18,702 --> 00:14:21,004
You're like a big, scary mama bear.
474
00:14:21,071 --> 00:14:23,506
I'm gonna Jackass into these melons!
475
00:14:23,574 --> 00:14:24,774
[grunting]
476
00:14:24,842 --> 00:14:25,975
JESS: Ah...
477
00:14:26,043 --> 00:14:28,678
[Jess laughing]
478
00:14:31,348 --> 00:14:33,349
I'm okay.
479
00:14:33,417 --> 00:14:35,184
[sighs]
480
00:14:35,252 --> 00:14:37,520
You're my mama bear, girl.
481
00:14:37,588 --> 00:14:39,222
Oh...
482
00:14:40,228 --> 00:14:41,324
I wish I had someone
483
00:14:41,392 --> 00:14:42,892
in my life who cared about me the way
484
00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:44,060
you guys care about each other.
485
00:14:44,128 --> 00:14:45,194
[gasps]
486
00:14:45,262 --> 00:14:46,963
[whispering]: Oh, don't.
487
00:14:47,031 --> 00:14:48,731
- [whispering]: You do.
- I just... I've been a cop
488
00:14:48,799 --> 00:14:50,700
- for five years and...
- You do.
489
00:14:50,768 --> 00:14:51,801
Jessica!
490
00:14:51,869 --> 00:14:52,935
I just wanted to celebrate it,
491
00:14:53,003 --> 00:14:55,215
- [mouthing]
- but then Tripp had to leave
492
00:14:55,241 --> 00:14:56,775
to meet an owl for sushi.
493
00:14:57,353 --> 00:15:00,741
An owl he sent a basket of mice
to at Christmas, who
494
00:15:00,742 --> 00:15:02,675
I'm pretty sure has
a nicer house than me.
495
00:15:02,743 --> 00:15:04,955
[gasps] Let me tell her... please!
496
00:15:04,981 --> 00:15:06,315
- [door opens]
- I'll blame it on being stoned.
497
00:15:06,383 --> 00:15:07,316
Stoned?
498
00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:08,984
You're stoned?
499
00:15:09,052 --> 00:15:10,452
That makes this a drug case.
500
00:15:10,520 --> 00:15:11,420
Okay, yeah, you have no idea
501
00:15:11,488 --> 00:15:12,525
what you're talking about.
502
00:15:12,526 --> 00:15:14,214
- Wait, no, I made a mistake.
- You better get
503
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:15,807
comfortable, you're gonna be here
504
00:15:15,875 --> 00:15:17,084
for a long time, lady!
505
00:15:17,084 --> 00:15:17,851
A long time!
506
00:15:17,918 --> 00:15:20,553
Oh, you little...
507
00:15:20,621 --> 00:15:22,055
power trip...
508
00:15:22,123 --> 00:15:23,356
trash guard!
509
00:15:23,424 --> 00:15:24,424
You know what?
510
00:15:24,492 --> 00:15:26,531
This is over!
511
00:15:26,609 --> 00:15:27,876
The only way you
512
00:15:27,943 --> 00:15:29,344
are gonna get to her
513
00:15:29,412 --> 00:15:31,046
is if you go through me,
514
00:15:31,113 --> 00:15:35,550
and you are not getting through me.
515
00:15:37,386 --> 00:15:40,889
[in slow motion]: Mama bear.
516
00:15:40,956 --> 00:15:43,058
- [Cece growls]
- ALY: Oh...
517
00:15:46,605 --> 00:15:48,773
[in slow motion]: Oh, don't do that.
No...
518
00:15:48,841 --> 00:15:51,042
Oh
519
00:15:51,111 --> 00:15:52,278
Hey, no!
520
00:15:52,345 --> 00:15:53,279
No, no, no!
521
00:15:53,346 --> 00:15:54,280
Return of the mack
522
00:15:54,347 --> 00:15:55,528
I have a system.
523
00:15:55,529 --> 00:15:57,163
-
Return of the mack
- [guard yells]
524
00:15:57,231 --> 00:15:58,164
Come on
525
00:15:58,232 --> 00:15:59,332
Return of the mack
526
00:15:59,399 --> 00:16:01,200
-
Oh, my God
- No, please.
527
00:16:01,268 --> 00:16:03,069
-
Return of the mack, here I am
- The shoes.
528
00:16:03,137 --> 00:16:04,237
-
Return of the mack
- I had those all paired off.
529
00:16:04,304 --> 00:16:05,238
Once again
530
00:16:05,305 --> 00:16:06,272
Return of the mack
531
00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:07,707
-
Top of the world
- Run!
532
00:16:07,775 --> 00:16:09,342
Return of the mack
533
00:16:09,409 --> 00:16:10,676
-
Watch my flow
- No!
534
00:16:10,744 --> 00:16:12,145
What?
535
00:16:12,212 --> 00:16:14,680
-
Return of the mack
- Hey, no, wait! No!
536
00:16:14,748 --> 00:16:15,681
537
00:16:15,749 --> 00:16:17,049
Return of the mack
538
00:16:17,117 --> 00:16:18,084
Watch my flow
539
00:16:18,152 --> 00:16:19,252
Return of the mack
540
00:16:19,319 --> 00:16:20,253
Here I go...
541
00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:21,621
Mama bear!
542
00:16:21,688 --> 00:16:23,623
That was freaking awesome!
543
00:16:23,690 --> 00:16:25,291
Aly, Winston has a crush on you!
544
00:16:25,359 --> 00:16:27,226
- [music stops]
- What?
545
00:16:27,294 --> 00:16:28,728
-
Return of the mack
- Bishop has a crush on me?!
546
00:16:28,796 --> 00:16:29,762
Up and down...
- Run!
547
00:16:32,671 --> 00:16:34,381
Bishop has a crush on me?
548
00:16:35,485 --> 00:16:36,418
Bishop?
549
00:16:36,486 --> 00:16:37,033
Mm-hmm.
550
00:16:37,033 --> 00:16:38,533
No, I can't date my partner.
551
00:16:38,601 --> 00:16:40,202
Why not? He's the best guy!
552
00:16:40,269 --> 00:16:41,870
And you broke up with what's-his-name.
553
00:16:41,938 --> 00:16:42,871
What? No, I didn't.
554
00:16:42,939 --> 00:16:44,706
- Hmm?
- No, Tripp and I are
555
00:16:44,774 --> 00:16:46,374
just... we're in a fight.
556
00:16:48,611 --> 00:16:50,045
Ah.
557
00:16:50,112 --> 00:16:51,379
Interesting
558
00:16:51,447 --> 00:16:52,581
information.
559
00:16:52,648 --> 00:16:54,649
I...
560
00:16:54,895 --> 00:16:57,196
texted Winston and
told him you were single.
561
00:16:57,222 --> 00:16:58,089
- What?
- Oh...
562
00:16:58,156 --> 00:16:59,323
it's fine.
563
00:16:59,391 --> 00:17:00,658
They're in Las Vegas.
564
00:17:00,726 --> 00:17:01,982
They're...
565
00:17:01,982 --> 00:17:05,651
stuffing coins into the
underpanties of women.
566
00:17:09,356 --> 00:17:10,156
Oh, my God!
567
00:17:10,224 --> 00:17:11,157
CECE: What happened to you?
568
00:17:11,225 --> 00:17:12,792
We can't talk
569
00:17:12,860 --> 00:17:14,394
about it right now. We're here
to help Winston with...
570
00:17:14,461 --> 00:17:15,828
Who did that to you?
Where are they? I will kill them.
571
00:17:15,896 --> 00:17:17,263
Oh, uh...
572
00:17:17,331 --> 00:17:19,332
truth be told, it was a child.
573
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:20,500
- WINSTON: Uh, Aly.
- Child?
574
00:17:20,567 --> 00:17:21,834
You're... you're here.
575
00:17:21,902 --> 00:17:23,369
[laughs]
576
00:17:23,437 --> 00:17:25,705
Uh, guys, you...
577
00:17:25,773 --> 00:17:27,306
- you ready?
- JESS: Winston.
578
00:17:27,374 --> 00:17:29,042
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, wait.
- No... no.
579
00:17:29,109 --> 00:17:30,176
- Mm-mm, no.
- Trust me.
580
00:17:30,244 --> 00:17:31,144
- Mm-mm, mm-mm.
- Don't. Mm-mm.
581
00:17:31,211 --> 00:17:35,214
Alison
582
00:17:35,282 --> 00:17:37,850
-
I know this world
- Aly, um, look, I really like you,
583
00:17:37,918 --> 00:17:40,053
-
Is killing
- and, um...
584
00:17:40,120 --> 00:17:41,888
You, oh look, I know you just
broke up with your boyfriend,
585
00:17:41,955 --> 00:17:43,951
-
Alison
- but... whenever you're ready,
586
00:17:43,977 --> 00:17:46,044
- I'd like to take you on a date.
- [mouthing]
587
00:17:46,113 --> 00:17:48,248
A real date, you know,
with food, and music...
588
00:17:48,315 --> 00:17:49,749
Bishop, I didn't...
589
00:17:49,817 --> 00:17:52,252
-
My aim
- I didn't break up with him.
590
00:17:52,319 --> 00:17:54,254
Oh, you've got a husband now.
591
00:17:55,523 --> 00:17:56,990
We didn't break up.
592
00:17:57,580 --> 00:17:59,415
I'm sorry, uh...
593
00:17:59,794 --> 00:18:00,761
Jess said...
594
00:18:01,095 --> 00:18:02,829
There was a miscommunication.
595
00:18:03,931 --> 00:18:05,832
It wasn't really me.
596
00:18:05,900 --> 00:18:07,500
It was high Jess.
597
00:18:07,568 --> 00:18:08,868
I missed high Jess?!
598
00:18:08,936 --> 00:18:10,503
Now I have to wait another ten years?
599
00:18:10,571 --> 00:18:12,005
I can't take it anymore.
I just have to say something.
600
00:18:12,072 --> 00:18:13,740
Cece, I'm still in love
with you, all right?
601
00:18:13,808 --> 00:18:15,375
Don't marry Schmidt.
602
00:18:15,443 --> 00:18:17,043
That's a big mistake, all right?
You run away with me...
603
00:18:17,111 --> 00:18:18,378
- Not now, Robby.
- Honestly, stop.
604
00:18:18,446 --> 00:18:20,413
Now's not the time, Robby.
Okay, it makes sense, I...
605
00:18:20,481 --> 00:18:22,081
I've been in this apartment
before, I'm certain of it.
606
00:18:22,149 --> 00:18:23,550
It was 1972.
607
00:18:23,617 --> 00:18:26,519
Gore Vidal, Linda Lavin,
and I were all drunk
608
00:18:26,587 --> 00:18:27,922
on white port and cough syrup...
609
00:18:27,922 --> 00:18:29,255
Guys, quiet, please,
610
00:18:29,322 --> 00:18:30,255
I just...
611
00:18:30,323 --> 00:18:31,256
I need to talk to Bishop
612
00:18:31,324 --> 00:18:32,257
for a second.
613
00:18:33,067 --> 00:18:35,335
I'm so sorry about this.
614
00:18:35,995 --> 00:18:38,730
That song was nice.
615
00:18:38,798 --> 00:18:42,401
Um... Aly is actually
not short for Alison
616
00:18:42,469 --> 00:18:43,602
but...
617
00:18:43,670 --> 00:18:45,037
it was really good effort. Okay, cool,
618
00:18:45,105 --> 00:18:46,738
yeah, that's... [exhales]
619
00:18:46,806 --> 00:18:48,740
I'm-I'm good. I'm good, um...
620
00:18:48,808 --> 00:18:51,110
Tripp, you know, he's a very lucky guy,
621
00:18:51,177 --> 00:18:52,945
very lucky guy, but I'm fine.
Don't worry about me.
622
00:18:53,012 --> 00:18:54,313
I'm just gonna go to my room
623
00:18:54,380 --> 00:18:56,381
and try to shove my face
through a heating grate.
624
00:18:56,449 --> 00:18:57,649
[chuckles]
625
00:18:57,717 --> 00:18:59,985
Yeah, Jess, I will deal
with you in the morning.
626
00:19:00,053 --> 00:19:02,387
You know what my Grammy always said,
627
00:19:02,455 --> 00:19:04,423
"Why put off for tomorrow-day,
628
00:19:04,491 --> 00:19:08,227
what you could say, nnn... today-day?"
629
00:19:10,096 --> 00:19:11,396
Yeah.
630
00:19:11,464 --> 00:19:13,065
Oh, Aly, um...
631
00:19:13,133 --> 00:19:14,700
Happy Copiversary.
632
00:19:15,734 --> 00:19:17,622
You've been a cop five years today,
633
00:19:17,648 --> 00:19:19,682
and I know how much that means to you,
634
00:19:19,750 --> 00:19:20,998
so...
635
00:19:20,998 --> 00:19:24,434
congratulations, I am very proud of you.
636
00:19:24,502 --> 00:19:25,435
Oh, my...
637
00:19:25,914 --> 00:19:27,247
Wait, Winston.
638
00:19:27,273 --> 00:19:30,212
Uh, something told me
not to go with copiversary.
639
00:19:30,238 --> 00:19:33,259
My first choice, though,
was Police Navidad.
640
00:19:33,347 --> 00:19:35,081
No, I just...
641
00:19:36,277 --> 00:19:37,544
You remembered.
642
00:19:37,612 --> 00:19:38,812
[chuckles]
643
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:40,547
Well, of course, I remembered.
644
00:19:40,615 --> 00:19:42,349
I mean, I'm your partner,
645
00:19:42,417 --> 00:19:43,350
why wouldn't I re... I mean, I...
646
00:19:57,198 --> 00:19:58,332
Thank you.
647
00:20:00,902 --> 00:20:02,236
[shouting in Russian]
648
00:20:02,303 --> 00:20:03,203
You!
649
00:20:03,271 --> 00:20:04,238
[Jess shouts]
650
00:20:04,305 --> 00:20:05,706
[panicked shouting, screaming]
651
00:20:12,313 --> 00:20:14,448
[gasping]
652
00:20:15,917 --> 00:20:18,419
Welcome to Russian bachelorette party!
653
00:20:18,486 --> 00:20:19,887
Oh, Nadia! Nadia, you look stunning!
654
00:20:19,954 --> 00:20:21,088
Praise Jesus!
655
00:20:21,156 --> 00:20:22,122
Now, dance, now!
656
00:20:22,190 --> 00:20:25,392
["You Sexy Thing" intro plays]
657
00:20:25,460 --> 00:20:27,294
CECE: Whoa.
658
00:20:27,362 --> 00:20:31,098
[cheering, whooping]
659
00:20:31,166 --> 00:20:32,733
[man singing in Russian]
660
00:20:32,801 --> 00:20:34,935
Dance! You dance now!
661
00:20:36,671 --> 00:20:38,605
All of you, you dance!
662
00:20:41,643 --> 00:20:43,010
I think I'm over Cece.
663
00:20:43,077 --> 00:20:44,178
Who is that?
664
00:20:44,245 --> 00:20:45,312
[meows]
665
00:20:45,380 --> 00:20:47,314
[laughing]
666
00:20:47,382 --> 00:20:48,615
667
00:20:48,683 --> 00:20:52,119
NADIA: I spank you, dirty Nick bastard!
668
00:20:52,187 --> 00:20:54,354
Shut up, monster!
669
00:20:54,422 --> 00:20:55,956
You hear me?!
670
00:20:56,024 --> 00:20:59,460
[laughing, whooping]
671
00:20:59,527 --> 00:21:00,727
Yeah!
672
00:21:03,331 --> 00:21:04,631
Yeah!
673
00:21:07,368 --> 00:21:09,603
This is the happiest
I've been in my entire life.
674
00:21:09,671 --> 00:21:11,638
I mean, look at my feet.
Can't you see how happy I am?
675
00:21:11,706 --> 00:21:12,806
Okay, you know I still technically
676
00:21:12,874 --> 00:21:14,141
have a boyfriend, right?
677
00:21:14,209 --> 00:21:15,275
Oh, it's cool, I'm married.
678
00:21:15,343 --> 00:21:16,410
What?
679
00:21:16,478 --> 00:21:17,945
Oh, don't worry, it was a prank.
680
00:21:18,012 --> 00:21:19,313
What?!
681
00:21:20,081 --> 00:21:21,014
Best man.
682
00:21:21,082 --> 00:21:22,316
Maid of honor.
683
00:21:23,384 --> 00:21:24,518
[needle buzzing]
684
00:21:24,586 --> 00:21:26,153
Who gets first tattoo?
685
00:21:26,221 --> 00:21:27,321
No, thank you.
686
00:21:27,388 --> 00:21:29,156
I'll take a shamrock on my knuckle.
687
00:21:29,224 --> 00:21:31,609
[Nick screaming]
688
00:21:31,635 --> 00:21:34,945
- synced and corrected by hawken45 -
- www.addic7ed.com -
689
00:21:34,995 --> 00:21:39,545
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