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1
00:00:05,100 --> 00:00:06,400
HONEY,
I'M THROWING THIS OUT.
2
00:00:06,400 --> 00:00:07,501
OH, PLEASE DON'T.
3
00:00:07,501 --> 00:00:08,734
LOOK HOW UGLY IT IS.
4
00:00:08,734 --> 00:00:10,200
STILL.
5
00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:11,734
IT'S AN ASPARAGUS
TEAPOT.
6
00:00:11,734 --> 00:00:14,133
MY COUSIN SHARON
GAVE IT TO US.
7
00:00:14,133 --> 00:00:15,834
DO YOU EVER
SEE SHARON?
8
00:00:15,834 --> 00:00:17,734
NO.
IS SHARON EVER COMING OVER HERE?
9
00:00:17,734 --> 00:00:19,667
NO.
DOES SHE LIKE ASPARAGUS TEA?
10
00:00:19,667 --> 00:00:21,000
NO.
I'M THROWING IT OUT.
11
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:21,968
PLEASE DON'T.
12
00:00:35,067 --> 00:00:37,367
* TELL ME WHY *
13
00:00:37,367 --> 00:00:39,067
* I LOVE YOU LIKE I DO *
14
00:00:39,067 --> 00:00:40,968
* TELL ME WHO *
15
00:00:40,968 --> 00:00:43,400
* CAN STOP MY HEART
AS MUCH AS YOU *
16
00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:45,234
* LET'S TAKE
EACH OTHER'S HAND *
17
00:00:45,234 --> 00:00:49,467
* AS WE JUMP
INTO THE FINAL FRONTIER *
18
00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:52,133
* I'M MAD ABOUT YOU,
BABY *
19
00:00:52,133 --> 00:00:54,334
* YEAH *
20
00:00:54,334 --> 00:00:56,734
* I'M MAD ABOUT YOU *
21
00:00:57,968 --> 00:01:00,868
* WHOO-HOO **
22
00:01:13,033 --> 00:01:14,868
CAN I HELP YOU?
23
00:01:14,868 --> 00:01:16,267
YES, PLEASE.
SIX CANNOLIS, PLEASE.
24
00:01:16,267 --> 00:01:17,200
S�I CANNOLI.
25
00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:18,067
I JUST DID.
26
00:01:21,033 --> 00:01:22,100
GOD, I LOVE
COMING HERE
27
00:01:22,100 --> 00:01:23,968
WILL YOU STOP STARING?
28
00:01:23,968 --> 00:01:25,501
YOU KNOW HOW
SHE LOOKS.
29
00:01:25,501 --> 00:01:27,567
I AM GOING TO
MARRY HER.
30
00:01:27,567 --> 00:01:29,267
YOU DON'T THINK
SHE'S BEAUTIFUL?
31
00:01:29,267 --> 00:01:30,133
SHE'S GORGEOUS.
32
00:01:30,133 --> 00:01:31,100
MAGNIFICENT.
33
00:01:31,100 --> 00:01:32,601
STUNNING.
34
00:01:32,601 --> 00:01:34,067
APHRODITE
AND HELEN OF TROY.
35
00:01:34,067 --> 00:01:35,334
YOU DON'T HAVE A SHOT.
36
00:01:35,334 --> 00:01:36,767
OH, YEAH?
37
00:01:36,767 --> 00:01:38,200
SHE'S OUT OF
YOUR LEAGUE.
38
00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:39,601
WHAT DO YOU MEAN
MY LEAGUE?
39
00:01:39,601 --> 00:01:40,701
YOUR LEAGUE. LOOK,
40
00:01:40,701 --> 00:01:42,701
YOU ARE IN YOUR LEAGUE,
41
00:01:42,701 --> 00:01:45,467
WHICH IS A GOOD LEAGUE.
TRIPLE "A."
42
00:01:45,467 --> 00:01:47,968
SHE IS IN HER LEAGUE,
PROFESSIONAL, MAJOR LEAGUE.
43
00:01:47,968 --> 00:01:49,667
NO SUCH THING
AS LEAGUES.
44
00:01:49,667 --> 00:01:51,634
SO MUCH
OF THE WORLD'S PAIN
45
00:01:51,634 --> 00:01:53,300
HAS STARTED WITH
THAT VERY SENTENCE.
46
00:01:53,300 --> 00:01:54,567
O.K., YOU KNOW EVERYTHING.
47
00:01:54,567 --> 00:01:56,667
IT JUST SO HAPPENS
48
00:01:56,667 --> 00:01:58,601
THAT I'VE MADE SOME
PROGRESS WITH HER.
49
00:01:58,601 --> 00:01:59,534
WITH HER?
50
00:01:59,534 --> 00:02:01,367
YEAH.
51
00:02:01,367 --> 00:02:03,234
THAT'S WHY SHE HASN'T
LOOKED AT YOU?
52
00:02:03,234 --> 00:02:05,968
YOU CAN TELL.
WHEN THEY'RE PUMPING THE CREAM,
53
00:02:05,968 --> 00:02:08,367
THAT'S WHEN
YOU GOT THEM.
54
00:02:08,367 --> 00:02:12,200
SHE'S PLAYING IT COOL
IN FRONT OF THE OLD MAN.
55
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,300
[SPEAKING ITALIAN]
56
00:02:17,167 --> 00:02:18,467
EXCUSE ME.
57
00:02:18,467 --> 00:02:20,300
SURE.
58
00:02:20,300 --> 00:02:23,300
I'M JUST SO SURPRISED
ITALY LET THIS GUY GO.
59
00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:26,100
WHAT I'D GIVE TO BE THAT
NAPOLEON RIGHT NOW.
60
00:02:26,100 --> 00:02:27,701
WHAT'S THE MATTER
WITH YOU?
61
00:02:27,701 --> 00:02:30,033
DO YOU UNDERSTAND
HOW THE WORLD WORKS?
62
00:02:30,033 --> 00:02:33,267
WOMEN LIKE THAT DON'T GO
FOR GUYS LIKE US.
63
00:02:33,267 --> 00:02:35,234
THEY DON'T SEE US.
64
00:02:35,234 --> 00:02:36,334
THEY DON'T EVEN
NOTICE US.
65
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,567
ALTHOUGH...
66
00:02:46,567 --> 00:02:48,801
JAMIE, HELP ME OUT HERE.
I'M CONFUSED.
67
00:02:48,801 --> 00:02:50,300
THIS IS WHAT,
YOUR RECEIPTS?
68
00:02:50,300 --> 00:02:52,200
THESE ARE MY
BUSINESS EXPENSES,
69
00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:54,100
THESE ARE FROM
PAUL'S BUSINESS,
70
00:02:54,100 --> 00:02:55,667
AND THESE ARE
MISCELLANEOUS RECEIPTS
71
00:02:55,667 --> 00:02:57,400
FROM STUFF
WE DID TOGETHER
72
00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:59,067
BUT MIGHT BE
DEDUCTIBLE AS SOMETHING.
73
00:02:59,067 --> 00:03:00,667
YOU CAN
TELL US WHAT.
74
00:03:00,667 --> 00:03:02,334
ROWBOAT RENTAL, $18.
75
00:03:02,334 --> 00:03:03,534
O.K., RIGHT THERE.
76
00:03:03,534 --> 00:03:04,801
THIS WAS
PAUL'S IDEA.
77
00:03:04,801 --> 00:03:06,400
WE WENT ROWING,
78
00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:08,167
BUT WE WERE
COMPLAINING ABOUT OUR JOBS.
79
00:03:08,167 --> 00:03:09,601
THROW THAT OUT.
80
00:03:09,601 --> 00:03:11,601
NEXT YEAR,
WHEN THE BABY COMES--
81
00:03:11,601 --> 00:03:13,667
KNOCK ON WOOD,
IT SHOULD ONLY HAPPEN.
82
00:03:13,667 --> 00:03:15,000
WE'LL BE MORE CREATIVE
83
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:16,934
WITH YOUR DEDUCTIONS.
84
00:03:16,934 --> 00:03:19,534
PUT FILES IN HIS CRIB AND
SAY IT'S OFFICE FURNITURE.
85
00:03:19,534 --> 00:03:20,667
YECCH.
86
00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:21,701
WHAT?
87
00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:23,434
I'M JUST SICK OF MYSELF.
88
00:03:23,434 --> 00:03:25,601
I'M SICK OF MY WHOLE
FAUX NATURAL--
89
00:03:25,601 --> 00:03:27,801
"I JUST WOKE UP THIS WAY
90
00:03:27,801 --> 00:03:30,367
BUT WE ALL KNOW
IT TOOK HOURS" LOOK.
91
00:03:30,367 --> 00:03:31,767
YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL.
92
00:03:31,767 --> 00:03:32,868
YOU KNOW WHAT I AM?
93
00:03:32,868 --> 00:03:34,000
I'M 32.
94
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,200
THIS EXEMPTION
FROM THREE YEARS AGO,
95
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:37,634
HOWEVER, IS WORTHLESS.
96
00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:38,934
WE NEVER SENT THAT IN?
97
00:03:38,934 --> 00:03:40,300
I'M HOLDING IT.
98
00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:41,501
OH, WELL, OOPS.
99
00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:45,300
I'LL TAKE CARE OF THAT.
100
00:03:45,300 --> 00:03:46,968
SEE THIS?
THESE GUYS RIGHT HERE.
101
00:03:46,968 --> 00:03:48,734
THESE ARE ALL STRESS.
102
00:03:48,734 --> 00:03:50,234
THIS ONE RIGHT HERE,
THAT'S PAUL.
103
00:03:50,234 --> 00:03:52,334
I HAVE THAT WRINKLE.
104
00:03:52,334 --> 00:03:53,667
AND THIS ONE RIGHT HERE
105
00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:54,767
IS ACTUALLY ALSO PAUL.
106
00:03:57,534 --> 00:03:58,868
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
107
00:03:58,868 --> 00:04:00,334
I'M 32 YEARS OLD
108
00:04:00,334 --> 00:04:03,267
I DON'T WANT TO GO DOWN
LOOKING LIKE THIS.
109
00:04:03,267 --> 00:04:04,267
HEY.
110
00:04:04,267 --> 00:04:05,501
HEY.
111
00:04:05,501 --> 00:04:07,200
DEB,
YOU'RE STILL HERE.
112
00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:08,834
HOW WE DOING?
113
00:04:08,834 --> 00:04:11,601
I MAY BE ABLE
TO KEEP YOU OUT OF PRISON.
114
00:04:11,601 --> 00:04:13,367
THAT'S ALL
WE WOULD ASK. HEY.
115
00:04:13,367 --> 00:04:14,767
HOW ARE YOU?
116
00:04:14,767 --> 00:04:17,133
I'M 32.
117
00:04:17,133 --> 00:04:19,634
ALL RIGHT.
SO I DIDN'T MISS MUCH.
118
00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:21,601
YOU HAVE TO TRY THESE.
119
00:04:21,601 --> 00:04:22,901
UNBELIEVABLE.
120
00:04:22,901 --> 00:04:24,701
WHAT, WHAT'S IN THERE?
121
00:04:24,701 --> 00:04:27,367
LITTLE PASTRIES
MADE FOR YOU BY THE ITALIAN PEOPLE.
122
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:29,200
IRA'S GOING OUT
WITH THAT GIRL NOW.
123
00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:30,367
WHAT GIRL?
124
00:04:30,367 --> 00:04:31,667
THIS BEAUTIFUL GIRL.
125
00:04:31,667 --> 00:04:32,734
WHAT BEAUTIFUL GIRL?
126
00:04:32,734 --> 00:04:34,200
I DIDN'T TELL YOU
127
00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:36,834
ABOUT THIS
BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN THE BAKERY?
128
00:04:36,834 --> 00:04:38,934
THERE'S
A BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN THE BAKERY.
129
00:04:38,934 --> 00:04:40,567
IRA'S GOING OUT
WITH HER NOW.
130
00:04:40,567 --> 00:04:42,133
WELL, GOOD FOR IRA.
131
00:04:42,133 --> 00:04:43,868
LIKE, UNBELIEVABLY
BEAUTIFUL.
132
00:04:43,868 --> 00:04:46,200
NO EXAGGERATION.
133
00:04:46,200 --> 00:04:48,534
POSSIBLY THE MOST
BEAUTIFUL WOMAN I'VE EVER SEEN.
134
00:04:48,534 --> 00:04:50,300
I GET NERVOUS
TALKING TO HER.
135
00:04:50,300 --> 00:04:51,801
SO HOW'S WORK?
136
00:04:51,801 --> 00:04:53,100
WORK. EVERYBODY
HATES ME THERE.
137
00:04:53,100 --> 00:04:54,801
THEY DO NOT.
138
00:04:54,801 --> 00:04:56,834
SO, THIS WOMAN,
IRA'S NEW GIRLFRIEND,
139
00:04:56,834 --> 00:04:59,400
WHAT, EXACTLY,
IS SO BEAUTIFUL ABOUT HER?
140
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:01,801
YES. GO. SHARE ALL
THE DETAILS WITH YOUR WIFE.
141
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,634
IS THIS A THING?
142
00:05:03,634 --> 00:05:05,434
I CAN'T SHARE THIS
WITH YOU?
143
00:05:05,434 --> 00:05:06,534
OF COURSE
YOU CAN.
144
00:05:06,534 --> 00:05:08,334
AM I BEING
UNREASONABLE?
145
00:05:08,334 --> 00:05:10,601
A PERSON CAN'T SHARE
WITH THEIR PARTNER
146
00:05:10,601 --> 00:05:11,968
THAT SOMEBODY ELSE
IS ATTRACTIVE?
147
00:05:11,968 --> 00:05:13,334
NO. GO AHEAD.
148
00:05:13,334 --> 00:05:15,667
SERIOUSLY.
149
00:05:15,667 --> 00:05:16,968
WE'RE INTERESTED.
150
00:05:20,100 --> 00:05:22,100
O.K.
151
00:05:22,100 --> 00:05:26,567
ALL I'M SAYING IS THAT
THIS WOMAN HAS A QUALITY--
152
00:05:26,567 --> 00:05:29,334
SHE'S A MYSTERIOUS,
LIKE AN ETHNIC, YOU KNOW?
153
00:05:29,334 --> 00:05:31,534
SHE'S JUST, LIKE,
A BEAUTI--
154
00:05:31,534 --> 00:05:34,200
LOOK, YOU KNOW. YOU--
YOU ARE A TREMENDOUSLY BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.
155
00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,067
YOU REALLY ARE.
156
00:05:36,067 --> 00:05:38,701
YOURS IS A SOPHISTICATED--
IT'S VERY INTELLIGENT--
157
00:05:38,701 --> 00:05:41,133
IT'S LIKE AN ACCESSIBLE
KIND OF BEAUTY, YOU KNOW?
158
00:05:41,133 --> 00:05:42,033
THIS WOMAN...
159
00:05:43,767 --> 00:05:45,133
WHAT?
160
00:05:45,133 --> 00:05:47,234
THIS--THIS WOMAN--
IT'S LIKE A--
161
00:05:47,234 --> 00:05:49,501
IT'S LIKE A RAW, DRAMATIC
KIND OF BEAUTY.
162
00:05:49,501 --> 00:05:51,334
DRAMATIC?
163
00:05:51,334 --> 00:05:52,767
JUST FORGET
THE WHOLE THING.
164
00:05:52,767 --> 00:05:53,834
WHAT?
165
00:05:53,834 --> 00:05:55,467
FORGET IT.
166
00:05:55,467 --> 00:05:56,400
SHE ASKED.
167
00:05:56,400 --> 00:05:57,701
I DID.
168
00:05:57,701 --> 00:05:59,133
I WANT TO HEAR IT.
169
00:05:59,133 --> 00:06:00,734
WHAT DID YOU SAY?
170
00:06:00,734 --> 00:06:01,968
YOU SAID
SHE'S DRAMATIC?
171
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:06,701
MY POINT--
172
00:06:06,701 --> 00:06:08,267
MY POINT WAS THIS. SHE--
173
00:06:10,934 --> 00:06:14,667
THERE IS BEAUTIFUL AND THEN
THERE'S BEAUTIFUL.
174
00:06:14,667 --> 00:06:16,934
THERE'S BEAUTIFUL
IN THE JAMIE SENSE,
175
00:06:16,934 --> 00:06:19,167
WHICH IS
TREMENDOUSLY BEAUTIFUL
176
00:06:19,167 --> 00:06:22,501
AND, BELIEVE ME,
ALL I WOULD EVER NEED.
177
00:06:22,501 --> 00:06:25,133
THEN THERE'S BEAUTIFUL
IN THE SENSE OF THIS WOMAN,
178
00:06:25,133 --> 00:06:27,267
WHICH IS LIKE
AN ORGANICALLY, COSMICALLY,
179
00:06:27,267 --> 00:06:30,467
LIKE, NO MORE
BEAUTIFUL THAN YOU.
180
00:06:30,467 --> 00:06:31,901
IT'S NOT A MEASURE--
181
00:06:31,901 --> 00:06:34,334
IT--LOOK--YOU KNOW--
182
00:06:34,334 --> 00:06:35,267
SEE, YOU KNOW WHAT?
183
00:06:38,133 --> 00:06:39,767
THE TRUTH IS, SHE--
184
00:06:39,767 --> 00:06:41,868
THAT'S HER
ONLY THING, SEE?
185
00:06:41,868 --> 00:06:43,634
HER BEAUTY.
SO SHE HAS THAT.
186
00:06:43,634 --> 00:06:45,501
SHE HAS THE BEAUTY,
187
00:06:45,501 --> 00:06:48,534
WHEREAS YOU HAVE
SO MANY GIFTS, YOU KNOW?
188
00:06:48,534 --> 00:06:51,968
WHEREAS TO YOU, GOD GAVE
WITH BOTH HANDS, AND SHE--
189
00:06:51,968 --> 00:06:54,501
THAT'S IT.
THAT'S, LIKE, YOU KNOW--
190
00:06:54,501 --> 00:06:56,667
SHE'S, LIKE,
SHE'S PATHETIC IS WHAT SHE IS.
191
00:06:56,667 --> 00:06:58,200
YOU KIND OF--
192
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,033
YOU HAVE TO FEEL
SORRY FOR HER.
193
00:07:06,634 --> 00:07:08,701
SO IRA MET A PRETTY GIRL.
194
00:07:08,701 --> 00:07:09,767
THAT'S ALL I'M SAYING.
195
00:07:12,200 --> 00:07:14,434
IT'S A PLEASURE
TO MEET YOU.
196
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:17,033
AND IT'S A PLEASURE
TO MEET YOU.
197
00:07:17,033 --> 00:07:18,667
IT'S A PLEASURE
TO MEET YOU.
198
00:07:18,667 --> 00:07:20,334
ACTUALLY,
YOU KNOW, WE MET.
199
00:07:20,334 --> 00:07:22,167
WE DID. AT THE BAKERY.
200
00:07:22,167 --> 00:07:24,167
I DIDN'T THINK
YOU WOULD REMEMBER
201
00:07:24,167 --> 00:07:26,968
BECAUSE YOU WERE RIGHT
IN THE MIDDLE OF--
202
00:07:26,968 --> 00:07:29,434
YEAH. WE WERE
DOING THIS.
203
00:07:29,434 --> 00:07:30,501
THAT'S WHAT
YOU WERE DOING.
204
00:07:30,501 --> 00:07:31,934
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
205
00:07:31,934 --> 00:07:33,200
IT'S ONLY ME.
206
00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:34,667
MY WIFE'S
ON HER WAY.
207
00:07:34,667 --> 00:07:35,901
SHE'LL KISS ME
PLENTY.
208
00:07:35,901 --> 00:07:38,067
RIGHT, SPLINKY?
209
00:07:38,067 --> 00:07:39,968
YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
210
00:07:39,968 --> 00:07:41,267
SPLINKY, WHAT IS
THIS SPLINKY?
211
00:07:41,267 --> 00:07:42,701
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
212
00:07:42,701 --> 00:07:44,367
IT'S NOTHING.
213
00:07:44,367 --> 00:07:46,734
IT'S JUST A NICKNAME
FROM WHEN WE WERE KIDS.
214
00:07:46,734 --> 00:07:48,067
PAULIE.
215
00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:50,100
TELL A FUNNY STORY.
BREAK THE ICE.
216
00:07:50,100 --> 00:07:54,434
WHEN WE WERE KIDS,
MY MOM GOT A BIKINI--
217
00:07:54,434 --> 00:07:57,534
A BIKINI AS A GIFT.
SOMEBODY GAVE IT TO HER.
218
00:07:57,534 --> 00:07:59,367
SHE WOULD NEVER
WEAR IT, SO,
219
00:07:59,367 --> 00:08:01,300
THIS GUY, HE'S CRAZY.
220
00:08:01,300 --> 00:08:03,868
HE'S WEARING IT
AROUND THE HOUSE.
221
00:08:03,868 --> 00:08:06,534
WE WERE 5 YEARS OLD.
IT MEANS NOTHING.
222
00:08:06,534 --> 00:08:09,267
SO HE WAS WEARING IT,
223
00:08:09,267 --> 00:08:12,033
AND YOU COULD SEE
THROUGH THE MATERIAL.
224
00:08:12,033 --> 00:08:13,467
YOU COULD SEE
HIS SPLINKY.
225
00:08:16,100 --> 00:08:17,167
SO WE WOULD SAY SPLINKY.
THAT'S--THAT'S...
226
00:08:22,434 --> 00:08:24,234
I DON'T KNOW
WHERE JAMIE IS.
227
00:08:24,234 --> 00:08:25,267
I'LL CALL HER.
228
00:08:25,267 --> 00:08:26,234
EXCUSE ME.
229
00:08:36,701 --> 00:08:37,934
YOU LIKE IT?
230
00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:02,334
YEAH, SO I DO LIKE
YOUR HAIR. YES.
231
00:09:02,334 --> 00:09:03,133
IT SEEMS LIKE
YOU DO.
232
00:09:05,133 --> 00:09:06,968
THAT'S NOT BAD, HUH?
233
00:09:06,968 --> 00:09:09,167
THAT'S SIX HOURS,
42 MINUTES
234
00:09:09,167 --> 00:09:10,701
OF PRETTY MUCH
INTIMATE LOVEMAKING.
235
00:09:10,701 --> 00:09:11,834
PRETTY MUCH.
236
00:09:11,834 --> 00:09:12,801
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
237
00:09:12,801 --> 00:09:14,300
AND I GOT TO SAY
238
00:09:14,300 --> 00:09:16,200
YOU WERE CRUCIAL
TO SO MANY PARTS OF IT.
239
00:09:17,801 --> 00:09:19,133
HELLO.
240
00:09:19,133 --> 00:09:21,100
SHE DUMPED ME, PAULIE.
241
00:09:21,100 --> 00:09:24,367
YEAH, TWO WEEKS,
FOUR DAYS, TWO HOURS,
242
00:09:24,367 --> 00:09:27,567
AND SHE DUMPED ME
LIKE THE QUEEN OF SPADES.
243
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:31,400
BOY, I'M SORRY.
I FEEL TERRIBLE ABOUT IT.
244
00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:34,000
UM, CAN I CALL YOU BACK?
245
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,033
OH, NO.
DON'T BOTHER.
246
00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:36,200
YOU O.K.?
247
00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:37,434
THANKS A LOT.
248
00:09:37,434 --> 00:09:38,868
THANKS A LOT
FOR NOTHING.
249
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:42,701
HE JUST HUNG UP ON ME.
250
00:09:42,701 --> 00:09:43,734
WHY?
251
00:09:43,734 --> 00:09:45,300
WHY?
252
00:09:45,300 --> 00:09:46,667
'CAUSE EVERYBODY
HATES ME.
253
00:09:46,667 --> 00:09:47,501
NOT EVERYBODY.
254
00:10:00,734 --> 00:10:02,601
HELLO THERE.
255
00:10:02,601 --> 00:10:04,267
HEY, NAT.
256
00:10:04,267 --> 00:10:06,801
OH, HEY THERE,
MRS. BUCHMAN.
257
00:10:06,801 --> 00:10:08,968
SORRY.
I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU'D BE HOME.
258
00:10:08,968 --> 00:10:10,300
AW, THAT'S O.K.
259
00:10:10,300 --> 00:10:12,133
NO, 'CAUSE YOU KNOW,
260
00:10:12,133 --> 00:10:13,400
OTHERWISE I WOULD
HAVE KNOCKED
261
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:15,067
OR RUNG THE BELL
262
00:10:15,067 --> 00:10:17,367
OR MADE SOME OTHER
FORM OF, UH,
263
00:10:17,367 --> 00:10:19,167
TREATY OF ENTRY
HERE. HEY.
264
00:10:19,167 --> 00:10:20,100
HEY.
265
00:10:21,567 --> 00:10:22,968
HO THERE.
266
00:10:25,100 --> 00:10:28,667
OH, WELL,
YOU LIKE IT?
267
00:10:28,667 --> 00:10:30,767
JIMINY.
268
00:10:30,767 --> 00:10:33,367
JIMINY?
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
269
00:10:33,367 --> 00:10:35,934
JIMINY IS LIKE
WILLICKERS OR JEEPERS.
270
00:10:35,934 --> 00:10:37,868
IT'S IN
THE "WOW" FAMILY.
271
00:10:37,868 --> 00:10:39,334
YOU DON'T LIKE IT.
272
00:10:39,334 --> 00:10:40,834
NO, NO, NO.
273
00:10:40,834 --> 00:10:43,033
YOU CAN SAY
IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT.
274
00:10:43,033 --> 00:10:44,033
IT'S O.K.
275
00:10:44,033 --> 00:10:45,934
NO. I JUST, UH--
276
00:10:45,934 --> 00:10:47,567
THE QUESTION
THAT I WOULD ASK...
277
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,667
IS, UH...
278
00:10:50,667 --> 00:10:53,234
WHY?
279
00:10:53,234 --> 00:10:54,634
WHY WHAT?
280
00:10:54,634 --> 00:10:56,734
WHY WOULD YOU?
281
00:10:56,734 --> 00:10:58,167
OH.
282
00:10:58,167 --> 00:11:00,067
WELL, I GUESS
I JUST FELT
283
00:11:00,067 --> 00:11:02,567
LIKE I NEEDED A CHANGE,
284
00:11:02,567 --> 00:11:05,501
AND I GUESS I JUST WANTED
TO TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT.
285
00:11:05,501 --> 00:11:07,901
BUT WHY
DO YOU WANT TO TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT
286
00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:09,067
WHEN YOU'RE
ALREADY SO...
287
00:11:09,067 --> 00:11:09,934
YOU ARE, UH...
288
00:11:09,934 --> 00:11:11,501
WHAT?
289
00:11:11,501 --> 00:11:13,634
NO, NO.
290
00:11:13,634 --> 00:11:15,467
YOU KNOW, JUST...
291
00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:16,934
WELL...
292
00:11:16,934 --> 00:11:18,834
SPEAKING...WELL,
IF I MAY JUST...
293
00:11:18,834 --> 00:11:20,234
SPEAK AS A MAN...
294
00:11:20,234 --> 00:11:21,501
UM...WELL, UM...
295
00:11:21,501 --> 00:11:23,501
MAY I SPEAK
AS A MAN?
296
00:11:23,501 --> 00:11:25,400
PLEASE. PLEASE.
297
00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:28,133
I'M JUST GOING TO
LET THIS RIP.
298
00:11:28,133 --> 00:11:31,701
I'M FROM THE "IF IT
AIN'T BROKE, DON'T FIX IT" SCHOOL,
299
00:11:31,701 --> 00:11:34,467
AND, MRS. BUCHMAN,
YOU WERE EXTREMELY NOT BROKE.
300
00:11:34,467 --> 00:11:36,868
AND I MEAN THAT WITH
ALL DUE RESPECT.
301
00:11:36,868 --> 00:11:39,801
OH. NAT,
THAT'S VERY SWEET.
302
00:11:39,801 --> 00:11:41,601
FORGIVE ME
IF I'M SPEAKING OUT OF LINE.
303
00:11:41,601 --> 00:11:43,934
I KNOW I'M JUST HERE
TO WALK THE DOG,
304
00:11:43,934 --> 00:11:45,868
AND THAT'S
IRRESPECTIVE OF YOUR COLOR.
305
00:11:45,868 --> 00:11:48,834
WHATEVER YOU DO ON
A FOLLICULAR LEVEL,
306
00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:50,234
IT'S NONE
OF MY BEESWAX.
307
00:11:50,234 --> 00:11:52,934
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
308
00:11:52,934 --> 00:11:55,234
JUST, YOU KNOW,
OUT OF CURIOSITY,
309
00:11:55,234 --> 00:11:56,567
HOW DID MR. BUCHMAN REACT?
310
00:11:56,567 --> 00:11:58,167
DID HE LIKE IT?
311
00:11:58,167 --> 00:12:00,534
HE FELT EXACTLY
THE SAME WAY AS YOU.
312
00:12:00,534 --> 00:12:01,701
YOU SEE?
313
00:12:07,934 --> 00:12:08,801
HEY, IRA?
314
00:12:10,100 --> 00:12:11,234
I?
315
00:12:12,300 --> 00:12:13,701
HEY, SPLINKY?
316
00:12:13,701 --> 00:12:15,367
I'LL GIVE YOU
SPLINKY.
317
00:12:15,367 --> 00:12:16,934
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
318
00:12:16,934 --> 00:12:18,834
YOU KILLED ME.
YOU SABOTAGED ME.
319
00:12:18,834 --> 00:12:20,367
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?
320
00:12:20,367 --> 00:12:22,067
AT LUNCH,
THE WAY YOU ACTED.
321
00:12:22,067 --> 00:12:23,767
HOW DID I ACT?
322
00:12:23,767 --> 00:12:25,367
71 TIMES
YOU TOLD HER,
323
00:12:25,367 --> 00:12:26,934
"IT'S NICE
TO MEET YOU."
324
00:12:26,934 --> 00:12:28,501
NOBODY'S THAT NICE
TO MEET.
325
00:12:28,501 --> 00:12:30,434
GET OFF OF ME,
YOU NUT JOB.
326
00:12:30,434 --> 00:12:33,300
THEN YOU TOLD HER
ABOUT SPLINKY. HOW COULD YOU?
327
00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:36,200
ONE SECOND, ONE SECOND.
328
00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:37,434
GET OFF OF ME.
329
00:12:37,434 --> 00:12:38,434
HOLD IT.
330
00:12:38,434 --> 00:12:39,300
HOLD IT.
331
00:12:41,968 --> 00:12:44,667
WHAT THE HELL ARE
YOU TALKING ABOUT?
332
00:12:44,667 --> 00:12:46,567
YOU WERE JEALOUS,
WEREN'T YOU?
333
00:12:46,567 --> 00:12:48,434
I WAS JEALOUS OF WHAT?
334
00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:50,267
OF THE FACT THAT
FOR THE FIRST TIME
335
00:12:50,267 --> 00:12:51,567
SINCE
THE FOURTH GRADE,
336
00:12:51,567 --> 00:12:53,400
I HAD A HOTTER GIRL
THAN YOU.
337
00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:56,400
O.K., FIRST OF ALL,
338
00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,567
COULD YOU BE, LIKE,
LESS MATURE?
339
00:12:58,567 --> 00:12:59,834
TAKE THAT BACK.
340
00:12:59,834 --> 00:13:01,300
I WILL NOT.
341
00:13:01,300 --> 00:13:03,367
I WILL NOT.
TAKE IT BACK.
342
00:13:03,367 --> 00:13:05,167
WHAT ARE YOU,
7 YEARS OLD NOW?
343
00:13:05,167 --> 00:13:06,901
I'M 7 YEARS OLD.
344
00:13:06,901 --> 00:13:08,501
JAMIE IS JUST AS HOT
AS SOPHIA.
345
00:13:08,501 --> 00:13:10,067
YOU WISH!
346
00:13:10,067 --> 00:13:12,734
SHE'S MORE HOT
THAN SOPHIA.
347
00:13:12,734 --> 00:13:14,434
THERE'S BEAUTIFUL, AND
THEN THERE'S BEAUTIFUL.
348
00:13:14,434 --> 00:13:16,868
YOU'RE SO STUPID.
349
00:13:16,868 --> 00:13:18,701
YOU THINK THERE'S
SOME OBJECTIVE STANDARD OF BEAUTIFUL?
350
00:13:18,701 --> 00:13:20,400
YES!
351
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:23,367
BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE
OF THE BEHOLDER,
352
00:13:23,367 --> 00:13:24,968
AND DON'T FORGET IT.
353
00:13:24,968 --> 00:13:25,734
YOU NUT!
354
00:13:30,968 --> 00:13:32,701
YOU'RE A LUNATIC,
YOU KNOWN THAT?
355
00:13:32,701 --> 00:13:33,868
YOU KNOW WHAT
I THINK?
356
00:13:33,868 --> 00:13:35,434
WHAT?
357
00:13:35,434 --> 00:13:37,567
I THINK THAT'S
A BUNCH OF CRAP.
358
00:13:37,567 --> 00:13:39,601
ALL RIGHT. COME ON.
359
00:13:39,601 --> 00:13:41,601
STUFF IT WITH YOUR
BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER!
360
00:13:41,601 --> 00:13:44,434
THERE IS NO
OBJECTIVE REALITY.
361
00:13:44,434 --> 00:13:46,267
GET OFF ME.
362
00:13:46,267 --> 00:13:47,434
ADMIT IT.
YOU WERE JEALOUS.
363
00:13:47,434 --> 00:13:48,934
BALONEY!
364
00:13:48,934 --> 00:13:50,901
YOU WANTED TO BEHOLD
WHAT I BEHELD.
365
00:13:50,901 --> 00:13:53,000
YOU DELIBERATELY TRIED
TO SABOTAGE ME.
366
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:55,534
YOU WOULDN'T QUIT
UNTIL SOPHIA WAS OUT OF MY LIFE.
367
00:13:55,534 --> 00:13:56,968
YOU'RE CHOKING ME HERE.
368
00:13:56,968 --> 00:13:57,968
GET OFF!
369
00:14:00,734 --> 00:14:01,834
YOU NUT!
370
00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:06,133
SHE WAS THE ONE,
PAULIE.
371
00:14:06,133 --> 00:14:08,701
IF I SAID SOMETHING
THAT EMBARRASSED YOU
372
00:14:08,701 --> 00:14:10,000
OR CAUSED YOU GRIEVANCE,
373
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,767
I APOLOGIZE.
374
00:14:11,767 --> 00:14:14,501
I'M VERY SORRY, O.K.?
375
00:14:14,501 --> 00:14:15,767
SHE WAS MY TESORO.
376
00:14:15,767 --> 00:14:16,801
I UNDERSTAND.
377
00:14:16,801 --> 00:14:18,234
YOU KNOW
WHAT THAT MEANS?
378
00:14:18,234 --> 00:14:20,133
NO. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
379
00:14:20,133 --> 00:14:21,467
I HAVE NO IDEA.
380
00:14:23,901 --> 00:14:25,667
WELL, YOU THINK ABOUT IT.
381
00:14:25,667 --> 00:14:28,434
I CAME HERE
AS A MAN OF PEACE.
382
00:14:28,434 --> 00:14:30,834
I CAME BECAUSE
I WAS CONCERNED ABOUT YOUR WELFARE.
383
00:14:30,834 --> 00:14:32,834
THIS IS
THE TREATMENT I GET.
384
00:14:32,834 --> 00:14:34,868
I GOT A LITTLE HOT.
I'M SORRY.
385
00:14:34,868 --> 00:14:37,033
LET ME
ASK YOU SOMETHING.
386
00:14:37,033 --> 00:14:39,934
DO YOU REALLY THINK
THAT ME TELLING HER ABOUT SPLINKY,
387
00:14:39,934 --> 00:14:41,167
THAT THAT'S--
ALL RIGHT!
388
00:14:46,901 --> 00:14:49,100
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO
BELIEVE THIS.
389
00:14:49,100 --> 00:14:51,267
HE BLAMES ME
FOR THE WHOLE SOPHIA THING.
390
00:14:51,267 --> 00:14:52,801
OW! WHAT?
391
00:14:52,801 --> 00:14:54,868
IT AIN'T BROKE.
DON'T FIX IT.
392
00:14:54,868 --> 00:14:56,000
OW!
393
00:15:02,467 --> 00:15:04,868
WELL, LET ME JUST SAY
EVERYBODY HATES ME.
394
00:15:04,868 --> 00:15:06,300
THEY DON'T HATE YOU.
395
00:15:06,300 --> 00:15:09,033
I DON'T HATE YOU.
396
00:15:09,033 --> 00:15:10,667
I USED TO HATE YOU.
397
00:15:10,667 --> 00:15:11,934
WHAT IS THAT?
398
00:15:11,934 --> 00:15:13,033
DURING THE DIVORCE.
399
00:15:13,033 --> 00:15:14,200
WHEN? WHY?
400
00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:15,601
OH, HATED YOUR GUTS.
401
00:15:15,601 --> 00:15:16,701
WHAT IS THAT ALL ABOUT?
402
00:15:16,701 --> 00:15:18,501
NO, NO, NO, NO.
403
00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:20,434
BECAUSE EVERY TIME
I SAW YOU,
404
00:15:20,434 --> 00:15:22,067
YOU WOULD
MENTION FRAN.
405
00:15:22,067 --> 00:15:24,367
FRAN AND JAMIE
DID THIS AND THAT.
406
00:15:24,367 --> 00:15:26,100
IT'S LIKE
YOU COULDN'T HELP YOURSELF.
407
00:15:26,100 --> 00:15:27,367
WHY DIDN'T YOU
SAY SOMETHING?
408
00:15:27,367 --> 00:15:29,601
WHO COULD GET A WORD IN?
409
00:15:29,601 --> 00:15:30,667
WELL, SORRY.
410
00:15:30,667 --> 00:15:32,534
SORRY.
411
00:15:32,534 --> 00:15:34,300
IT'S BLOOD
UNDER THE BRIDGE.
412
00:15:36,801 --> 00:15:38,601
I DON'T HATE YOU
ANYMORE.
413
00:15:38,601 --> 00:15:40,367
JAIME
DOESN'T HATE YOU. SHE'S UPSET.
414
00:15:40,367 --> 00:15:42,167
WHY WOULD SHE BE
SO UPSET?
415
00:15:42,167 --> 00:15:44,133
THAT I LIKE HER HAIR?
416
00:15:44,133 --> 00:15:49,000
YOU KNOW,
WHEN I WAS IN NEPAL,
417
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,901
I'M CHATTING
WITH THIS SHERPA
418
00:15:50,901 --> 00:15:52,868
ABOUT THE QUESTION
OF WHY,
419
00:15:52,868 --> 00:15:54,400
WHICH
IN HIS LANGUAGE
420
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:56,701
IS PRONOUNCED
"NCHTEM,"
421
00:15:56,701 --> 00:15:59,934
AND HE
SAID SOMETHING VERY INTERESTING.
422
00:15:59,934 --> 00:16:03,434
HE SAID THAT ASKING
THE QUESTION OF WHY
423
00:16:03,434 --> 00:16:05,767
IS LIKE PULLING
ONE LEG OFF A CENTIPEDE.
424
00:16:05,767 --> 00:16:07,100
IT GETS YOU NOWHERE.
425
00:16:07,100 --> 00:16:08,767
WHY?
426
00:16:08,767 --> 00:16:10,033
BECAUSE...
427
00:16:10,033 --> 00:16:11,534
FOR EVERY
QUESTION WHY
428
00:16:11,534 --> 00:16:13,501
THE ANSWER
IS BECAUSE,
429
00:16:13,501 --> 00:16:17,000
AND FOR
EVERY BECAUSE, THERE'S ANOTHER WHY.
430
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:21,000
WHY WOULD SHE BE
SO ANGRY AT ME?
431
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:24,200
BECAUSE SHE'S AFRAID
THAT AFTER SHE HAS THE BABY--
432
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:25,667
HEY, KNOCK ON WOOD.
433
00:16:25,667 --> 00:16:27,367
KNOCK WOOD.
434
00:16:27,367 --> 00:16:29,334
BECAUSE SHE'S AFRAID
THAT THEN
435
00:16:29,334 --> 00:16:31,667
SHE WON'T BE
ATTRACTIVE OR SEXY.
436
00:16:31,667 --> 00:16:32,934
THAT'S SO STUPID. WHY?
437
00:16:32,934 --> 00:16:34,200
SEE?
SHERPA WAS RIGHT.
438
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:36,234
HE WAS A WISE MAN.
439
00:16:36,234 --> 00:16:37,200
SAGE. HE WAS A SAGE.
440
00:16:41,267 --> 00:16:42,968
"YOU'RE ABOUT TO USE
CLAIROL BALSAM COLOR."
441
00:16:42,968 --> 00:16:44,200
DUH.
442
00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:45,400
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
443
00:16:47,501 --> 00:16:48,634
HELLO.
444
00:16:48,634 --> 00:16:50,267
IS THIS JAMIE?
445
00:16:50,267 --> 00:16:51,767
YES. WHO'S THIS?
446
00:16:51,767 --> 00:16:53,634
SOPHIA,
IRA'S FRIEND.
447
00:16:53,634 --> 00:16:54,601
OH, HI, SOPHIA.
HOW'S EVERYTHING?
448
00:16:54,601 --> 00:16:56,000
NOT SO GOOD.
449
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:57,434
WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
450
00:16:57,434 --> 00:16:59,467
IT'S IRA. HE WON'T
LEAVE ME ALONE.
451
00:16:59,467 --> 00:17:01,200
YOU HAVE TO COME
AND GET HIM.
452
00:17:01,200 --> 00:17:03,100
HOW DO YOU SAY?
453
00:17:03,100 --> 00:17:04,567
HE'S FREAKING OUT
ON THE STREET.
454
00:17:04,567 --> 00:17:06,300
LISTEN.
455
00:17:06,300 --> 00:17:07,701
* AND BY
THE LITTLE JEWELRY SHOP *
456
00:17:07,701 --> 00:17:09,968
* WE'LL STOP AND LINGER *
457
00:17:09,968 --> 00:17:12,634
* WHILE I BUY
A WEDDING RING *
458
00:17:12,634 --> 00:17:14,300
* FOR YOUR FINGER *
459
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,901
* IN THE MEANTIME... **
460
00:17:15,901 --> 00:17:17,968
IF YOU DON'T COME
AND GET HIM,
461
00:17:17,968 --> 00:17:19,601
MY FATHER'S GOING TO
BEAT HIM SILLY
462
00:17:19,601 --> 00:17:21,100
WITH A SFOGLIATELLI.
463
00:17:21,100 --> 00:17:23,000
A SFOGLIATELLI.
WITH A WHAT?
464
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,467
IT'S A SMALL
ITALIAN PASTRY
465
00:17:24,467 --> 00:17:26,601
WITH CHEESE
AND SUGAR AND--
466
00:17:26,601 --> 00:17:27,634
ALL RIGHT.
I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.
467
00:17:30,467 --> 00:17:31,467
TAXI!
468
00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:32,834
TAXI!
469
00:17:34,767 --> 00:17:36,734
* THOUGH IT'S HARD FOR US
TO WHISPER *
470
00:17:36,734 --> 00:17:38,367
[SCREAMS IN ITALIAN]
471
00:17:38,367 --> 00:17:39,767
NUTCAKE!
472
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:41,634
IRA, PLEASE. PLEASE.
473
00:17:41,634 --> 00:17:44,033
MY FATHER'S GOING TO
CALL THE POLICE.
474
00:17:44,033 --> 00:17:45,534
POP, NO.
475
00:17:45,534 --> 00:17:47,567
* WITH THAT OLD MOON *
476
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,200
* ABOVE THE
MEDITERRANEAN SEA *
477
00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:51,000
HEY, MARIO LANZA.
478
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:52,334
HEY, THERE.
HOW'S IT GOING?
479
00:17:52,334 --> 00:17:53,901
IT'S GOOD. EXCUSE ME.
480
00:17:53,901 --> 00:17:55,234
* IN THE MORNING-- **
481
00:17:55,234 --> 00:17:56,534
MAYBE NOT RIGHT NOW.
482
00:17:56,534 --> 00:17:58,133
NUTCAKE!
483
00:17:58,133 --> 00:18:00,267
NOTHING TO SEE HERE.
NOTHING TO SEE HERE.
484
00:18:00,267 --> 00:18:01,801
EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?
485
00:18:01,801 --> 00:18:03,534
OH, YEAH. I'M ACES.
486
00:18:03,534 --> 00:18:05,234
I GOT YOUR NOTE.
HOW ARE WE DOING?
487
00:18:05,234 --> 00:18:07,167
WHAT DO YOU CARE?
488
00:18:07,167 --> 00:18:08,701
WE'VE GOT EVERYTHING
UNDER CONTROL.
489
00:18:08,701 --> 00:18:10,400
WHY DON'T YOU GO GET
US SOME BISCOTTI?
490
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:11,901
YOU DON'T LIKE BISCOTTI.
491
00:18:11,901 --> 00:18:14,534
I'LL GET SOME BISCOTTI.
492
00:18:14,534 --> 00:18:15,934
COME HERE, YOU.
493
00:18:19,334 --> 00:18:20,701
SOPHIA, BUON GIORNO.
494
00:18:20,701 --> 00:18:22,501
BUONA NOTTE.
495
00:18:22,501 --> 00:18:25,133
IT IS TOO LATE
FOR GIORNO.
496
00:18:25,133 --> 00:18:26,534
HOPE SOMEBODY TOLD THAT
TO GIORNO.
497
00:18:26,534 --> 00:18:28,567
WHAT?
498
00:18:28,567 --> 00:18:33,267
UM, I THINK I NEED
TO APOLOGIZE TO YOU.
499
00:18:33,267 --> 00:18:34,400
FOR WHAT?
500
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,501
I MAY HAVE SAID SOMETHING
501
00:18:36,501 --> 00:18:39,534
OR ACTED IN A WAY AT LUNCH
502
00:18:39,534 --> 00:18:41,133
THAT WAS DEMEANING TO IRA,
503
00:18:41,133 --> 00:18:42,701
ONE THING IN PARTICULAR.
504
00:18:42,701 --> 00:18:43,868
YOU MEAN SPLINKY?
505
00:18:43,868 --> 00:18:47,534
YES. I THINK THAT WAS
MAYBE INAPPROPRIATE OF ME,
506
00:18:47,534 --> 00:18:50,968
AND, LISTEN, IF THAT HAD
ANYTHING AT ALL TO DO
507
00:18:50,968 --> 00:18:53,167
WITH THE REASON
YOU AND IRA--
508
00:18:53,167 --> 00:18:57,033
PAUL, I'M NOT
BREAKING UP WITH IRA BECAUSE OF SPLINKY.
509
00:18:57,033 --> 00:18:59,334
NO, I KNOW.
OF COURSE NOT.
510
00:18:59,334 --> 00:19:02,167
I LIKE SPLINKY.
IT WAS A CUTE STORY.
511
00:19:02,167 --> 00:19:03,267
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.
512
00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:04,734
IT'S JUST...
513
00:19:04,734 --> 00:19:07,701
IT'S JUST SO MUCH
WITH IRA, YOU KNOW?
514
00:19:07,701 --> 00:19:09,501
IT'S SO MUCH.
515
00:19:09,501 --> 00:19:11,701
IT'S JUST SO...
516
00:19:11,701 --> 00:19:13,234
MUCH.
517
00:19:13,234 --> 00:19:16,501
I THOUGHT I SENSED
HE WAS GETTING TOO MUCH.
518
00:19:16,501 --> 00:19:17,601
IT'S SO MUCH.
519
00:19:17,601 --> 00:19:20,167
YEAH. IN ALL FAIRNESS,
520
00:19:20,167 --> 00:19:22,300
I JUST THINK
HE LIKES YOU SO MUCH.
521
00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:24,000
HE GETS A LITTLE NERVOUS
522
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:25,868
BECAUSE,
NOT TO EMBARRASS YOU,
523
00:19:25,868 --> 00:19:27,300
YOU'RE VERY BEAUTIFUL.
524
00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:28,968
NO, NO. YOU ARE.
525
00:19:28,968 --> 00:19:31,501
A LOT OF TIMES
GUYS GET NERVOUS
526
00:19:31,501 --> 00:19:33,567
IN FRONT
OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN,
527
00:19:33,567 --> 00:19:34,834
LIKE A DRAMATIC BEAUTY.
528
00:19:34,834 --> 00:19:36,601
DRAMATIC?
529
00:19:36,601 --> 00:19:38,801
DRAMATIC.
FOR INSTANCE, MY WIFE,
530
00:19:38,801 --> 00:19:40,634
IT'S A SOPHISTICATED BEAUTY,
DIFFERENT.
531
00:19:40,634 --> 00:19:42,734
CAN I GET
SOME BISCOTTI, PLEASE?
532
00:19:44,701 --> 00:19:46,701
O.K.
533
00:19:46,701 --> 00:19:48,801
AND THEN HE TELLS HER
THE SPLINKY STORY.
534
00:19:48,801 --> 00:19:50,801
HE TOLD HER
THE SPLINKY STORY?
535
00:19:50,801 --> 00:19:52,801
WHAT
WAS HE THINKING?
536
00:19:52,801 --> 00:19:54,334
I DON'T KNOW.
537
00:19:54,334 --> 00:19:56,367
IT'S UNBELIEVABLE TO ME.
538
00:19:56,367 --> 00:19:57,601
I MEAN, JAMES,
539
00:19:57,601 --> 00:20:00,200
HE WAS ONCE
A QUALITY WINGMAN.
540
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,300
NOT THAT IT'S NOT
A CUTE STORY.
541
00:20:02,300 --> 00:20:04,434
YEAH, SURE, YOU KNOW
THE PERSON A LITTLE.
542
00:20:04,434 --> 00:20:07,367
STILL,
AS MUCH AS I LOVE
543
00:20:07,367 --> 00:20:10,567
TO BLAME ANYTHING
I POSSIBLY CAN ON MY HUSBAND,
544
00:20:10,567 --> 00:20:12,501
IT'S NOT
THE KIND OF THING
545
00:20:12,501 --> 00:20:14,434
YOU BREAK UP OVER,
YOU KNOW?
546
00:20:14,434 --> 00:20:15,701
IT'S NOT?
547
00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:21,868
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
HAPPENED TO ME, JAMES.
548
00:20:21,868 --> 00:20:25,667
THIS WOMAN,
SHE TOTALLY THREW ME OFF MY GAME.
549
00:20:25,667 --> 00:20:28,434
HAPPENS TO THE BEST
OF US.
550
00:20:28,434 --> 00:20:31,567
I DON'T KNOW
IF I HAD A CHANCE TO TELL YOU.
551
00:20:31,567 --> 00:20:33,367
I REALLY LIKE YOUR HAIR.
552
00:20:33,367 --> 00:20:35,033
THANK YOU.
553
00:20:35,033 --> 00:20:36,167
HEY!
554
00:20:36,167 --> 00:20:38,133
WELL, YOU WERE RIGHT.
555
00:20:38,133 --> 00:20:40,100
I WAS TALKING TO SOPHIA.
556
00:20:40,100 --> 00:20:41,834
SHE TOLD ME
I BLEW IT FOR YOU
557
00:20:41,834 --> 00:20:43,701
BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T WANT
TO HAVE ANYTHING TO DO
558
00:20:43,701 --> 00:20:46,367
WITH A GUY WHO'S GOT
A COUSIN AS DOPEY AS ME.
559
00:20:46,367 --> 00:20:47,367
NO KIDDING?
560
00:20:47,367 --> 00:20:48,701
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
561
00:20:48,701 --> 00:20:49,901
SO, FORGIVE ME?
562
00:20:54,634 --> 00:20:56,501
YOU HAD SFOGLIATELLI,
DIDN'T YOU?
563
00:20:56,501 --> 00:20:58,200
HEY, FROM NOW ON,
DOUGHNUTS.
564
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,067
IT'LL BE A LOT EASIER
ON EVERYBODY.
565
00:21:00,067 --> 00:21:01,734
ALL RIGHT.
566
00:21:01,734 --> 00:21:04,300
AND MY BEAUTIFUL
LITTLE BRIDE, HOW IS SHE?
567
00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:06,200
SHE'S BRUNETTE.
568
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:08,367
BRUNETTE AND BEAUTIFUL.
CAN I JUST SAY SOMETHING?
569
00:21:08,367 --> 00:21:10,033
LISTEN TO ME.
AS A BRUNETTE,
570
00:21:10,033 --> 00:21:12,000
AS A BLONDE,
571
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:14,767
AS A BALD LADY
LIKE ON STAR TREK,
572
00:21:14,767 --> 00:21:17,801
AS A FAT LADY WITH 11 KIDS
573
00:21:17,801 --> 00:21:20,434
OR A SMALL, LITTLE,
PETITE LADY WITH 15 KIDS,
574
00:21:20,434 --> 00:21:23,167
AS A HILL PERSON, AS A SOCK,
575
00:21:23,167 --> 00:21:25,234
WHATEVER YOU WANT,
IT'S ALL GOOD.
576
00:21:25,234 --> 00:21:27,534
SHE'S FINE.
577
00:21:27,534 --> 00:21:29,901
ALL RIGHT.
578
00:21:29,901 --> 00:21:31,534
LOOK AT THIS.
579
00:21:31,534 --> 00:21:32,667
WHAT?
580
00:21:32,667 --> 00:21:34,601
EVERYBODY LOVES ME.
THAT'S BETTER.
581
00:21:34,601 --> 00:21:35,601
COME ON.
582
00:21:35,601 --> 00:21:36,968
I'M SHATTERED, PAULIE.
583
00:21:36,968 --> 00:21:38,501
I'M A SHELL OF A MAN.
584
00:21:38,501 --> 00:21:39,601
I UNDERSTAND.
585
00:21:39,601 --> 00:21:41,267
I WILL NEVER,
EVER LOVE AGAIN.
586
00:21:41,267 --> 00:21:42,267
I REALIZE THAT.
587
00:21:42,267 --> 00:21:43,534
WHOOH.
588
00:21:49,501 --> 00:21:51,801
* WITH THE MOON ABOVE *
589
00:21:51,801 --> 00:21:54,133
* THE MEDITERRANEAN SEA *
590
00:21:54,133 --> 00:21:58,100
* IN THE MORNING, SIGNORINA,
WE'LL GO WALKING *
591
00:21:58,100 --> 00:22:00,367
* WHEN THE SUMMER
HELPS THE SUN *
592
00:22:00,367 --> 00:22:02,000
* TURN INTO NIGHT *
593
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:03,968
[SPEAKING ITALIAN]
NUTCAKE!
594
00:22:03,968 --> 00:22:06,601
* AND BY
THE LITTLE JEWELRY SHOP *
595
00:22:06,601 --> 00:22:08,534
* WE'LL STOP AND LINGER *
596
00:22:08,534 --> 00:22:10,467
* WHILE I BUY
A WEDDING RING *
597
00:22:10,467 --> 00:22:13,767
* FOR YOUR FINGER *
598
00:22:13,767 --> 00:22:18,267
* IN THE MEANTIME,
LET ME TELL YOU THAT I LOVE YOU *
599
00:22:18,267 --> 00:22:20,434
* BUONA SERA, SIGNORINA *
600
00:22:20,434 --> 00:22:22,400
* KISS ME GOOD NIGHT **
601
00:22:22,450 --> 00:22:27,000
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