All language subtitles for That.70s.Show.S07E14.1080p.BluRay.x264-YELLOWBiRD

You guys, guess what all of us
are doing on Sunday afternoon?

Uh...

I hope it's not
going antiquing again.

I told you, Donna, that's
just for girls.

Loved it. Definitely in.

No, during my radio show,

we did a promotion where the tenth caller
gets six tickets to the Packers game.

And since I turned off all the outside
phone lines after caller number nine,

I was caller number ten! We're
going to the Packers game!

Oh!

Awesome! We got six tickets
and there's six of us!

No, wait.
One, two, three... Wait.

Fez, stop moving around.
You're confusing me.

Wait, wait, wait. So we're all
gonna go to the game together?

Oh, what? You won't go now
'cause you and Hyde are broken up?

Well, I guess you'd rather stay here
and make sweet, short love to me.

No, no, no, I'm fine with going

because I'm the one
who did the breaking up.

Steven is the one
who's all devastated.

So why don't you go
make sweet, short love to him?

Um, I think something
got messed up here.

Well, I'm going
because I'm fine.

Well, good, 'cause I'm fine,
too. In fact, I'm superfine.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm
the one who's superfine here.

All right. I got the T-shirt
that says so.

Well, you also have a T-shirt
that says, "I'm with stupid,"

and the arrow is
pointing straight up.

Yeah, I hate that T-shirt. It
doesn't even make any sense.

Who's above me?

Okay, I hate to say it,
you guys,

but I think one of these
tickets has to go to my dad.

So that means one of us
has to sit this out. Let me see.

Eenie, meenie, miney, Kelso.

What? How could you
choose your dad over me?

Look, my dad is
a huge Packers fan,

and he's never
even been to a game.

Forman, it's not a problem.
We can all go.

Me, Kelso and Fez will do
the old ticket stub switch.

That sounds dirty.

Well, it's not.

I'll do it anyway.

What exactly sounds dirty
about "ticket stub switch"?

Oh, come on.

"Stub, switch."

What are you, frigid?

Hey, Dad, say, could you give
me a ride this Sunday afternoon at,

I don't know, 1:00?

Eric, this is football season.

I know this doesn't
mean much to you

since there are no flying men
with capes involved,

but I can't drive you anywhere
on Sunday until the spring.

And then your mother can do it.

Well, what if it was a ride
to legendary Lambeau Field,

where the Packers
are playing the Bears,

and where you will be sitting
next to me on the 50-yard line?

Eric.

What do you say, Dad?
This'll be great, huh?

Honey, are you crying?

No.

♪ Hanging out

♪ Down the street

♪ The same old thing

♪ We did last week

♪ Not a thing to do

♪ But talk to you

♪ We're all all right

♪ We're all all right ♪

Hello, Wisconsin!

See this young man here?
That's my boy.

And he invited me
to come and see this game.

I did that.

That was me.

Man, I can't go in there.
I got all that stuff.

Okay, listen, here's the plan.

We've got two tickets
and there's three of us.

So I'm gonna go inside
with one of you guys.

The guy who comes inside with me,
takes two stubs, comes back outside,

brings inside the guy who's
waiting outside. You got it?

Why can't you wait outside?

Yeah, why can't you?

Because I have a ticket.

- Oh, that makes sense.
- Okay, yeah.

Okay, now, to see
who's coming in with me,

instead of drawing straws,
we'll draw tickets, okay?

So, Kelso, you go first.

All right, I got one.

Damn!

Well, at least it was fair.

Jackie, are you sure you're
okay being here with Hyde?

Because I don't want you
to be sad the whole night.

I have a feeling I'm gonna miss
a lot of this game if you're sad.

Donna, please, okay? I'm past
the sad stage in the breakup.

Now I just want to
make someone pay.

Like when your uncle died
and you were sad,

so you hurt people
by firing your maid?

Okay, Donna, breaking up with Steven
was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

I gave him my heart
and he stomped on it.

I can't pretend
everything's okay.

Oh, and we didn't fire Martina.

We called immigration
and had them take care of it.

Thanks again for inviting me
over for the game, Kitty.

Well, it'll be fun.

Red never lets me watch the game
because one time, seven years ago,

the Packers won at the last
minute while I was in the kitchen.

Now I have to sit in the
kitchen every freaking Sunday.

Okay, Kitty, I need the Packers
to win by more than seven.

I got a Hunsky riding on it.

We call them
Hungarians now, Bob.

No, I bet $100.

- Hey, you want in for $10?
- Yes, please.

Oh, I feel like
a gangster's wife.

Ooh, how about
I get you some pretzels?

I don't want to be any trouble.

Oh, it's no trouble at all.

No, you didn't let me finish.

I don't want to be any trouble,
but I'm gonna need something hot.

Maybe something with refried
beans and a little cheese drizzled on it.

Go!

Man, you put a little schnapps
in the hot chocolate.

Eh, more like, I put a little
hot chocolate in the schnapps.

You kids talking about booze?
Well, schnapp it over here.

Eric, I think your dad's been
body-snatched by a nice guy.

I know. When the Packers got a
first down, he actually hugged me.

It was like... It was like, warm,
like I imagined it might be.

Hey, Kelso, go bring in Fez
now. You know the plan, right?

Take my stub and your stub,
and bring him in.

I got it, Hyde.
Jeez, I'm not two, you know.

Uh, what do I do if I get lost?

Dude, you're a cop.

Yeah, what good is
shooting somebody if I'm lost?

You know, Hyde, you're no help.

This is what
it's all about, huh?

Spending time out here, us men.

Eric, you should be wearing a
jersey. Here, go buy yourself one.

Whoa. Dad, thank you.

Eric, please,
only on first downs.

Wow, you actually
got food for everybody?

How unnaturally
thoughtful of you.

Oh, don't worry.
I have an ulterior motive.

See, I got Steven caramel corn,

but Steven doesn't like
caramel corn.

And he knows I know
he doesn't like caramel corn,

but I'm gonna give it
to him anyway.

- Wicked.
- Yeah.

Okay, boys, I got you all
your favorite snacks.

Red, I got you a hot dog.

Donna, I got you three hot dogs.

And, Steven,
I got you caramel corn.

- I don't like caramel corn.
- Oh, my.

Well, if I was
still your girlfriend

and not just someone you couldn't
see a future with, I might care.

But I'm not, so I don't.
Buh-burn!

Hey, Red, want to trade that
hot dog for the caramel corn?

Yeah, sure. I don't care.

Damn.
I forgot about tradesies.

Now, I could have sworn
there was some refried beans

right here behind
my emergency bourbon.

Kitty, the game's on.

I'll dip the chips in Crisco,
whatever you got.

- Oh, jeez.
- I got you.

I wasn't falling, Bob.

Oh.

Well, then this is awkward.

You can let go now, Bob.

- Where's Kelso?
- Outside, of course.

Why?

Um, we don't have
enough tickets.

How can you not get this?

Moron, how many ticket stubs
do you have on you?

I have two, mine and yours,
which, and try to keep up,

is why he's outside
and we're inside.

Okay, good.

Now go take both ticket stubs
and bring Kelso in.

But then how would you
get into the game?

I'm already in the game!
Now go!

Okay, okay. But you catch
more flies with honey.

Jackie wants to know

if you could take a picture of
her having the best day of her life.

Is she insane?

Of course.
What are you, new here?

Okay, Steven, now that I'm single, I
am very, very attractive to other men.

And I don't want to make you
miserable or anything,

but I think I'm gonna start dating
one of those big, stinky football fans.

- I'm single.
- No, not you, cheesehead.

I mean, whoo, cheesehead!

Forget it. Ugh!

Why isn't this working?
What is wrong with me?

I don't know.

You don't have that normal
Jackie thing that you usually have.

You know, most of the time
when you put your mind to it,

you can really hurt someone.

Okay, do you remember
Ashley Caldwell

when she was talking about you
behind your back?

And then you told
all the other cheerleaders

the reason that she couldn't do a
split is because she had a wiener?

Well, yeah, but, Donna, that was
easy. I really wanted to hurt her.

And you don't really
want to hurt Hyde?

Because you still love him?

Hey, some jerk's
wearing a Bears jersey.

- Let's all get together
and kick his ass.
Yeah!

Man, all these guys are pissed off at
something, huh, Dad?

"Dad"?
Who is this guy?

- Bears, boo!
- Boo!

Eric, how the hell can you wear
a Bears jersey at a Packer game?

Okay, maybe he doesn't
understand why it's wrong.

Let me tell you in a way
how you can understand.

The Packers are like the Jedi,

and you're wearing
a "Go Darth Vader" jersey.

Donna, that's ridiculous.
The Jedi don't play football.

They play Manuku.

Forman, this is worse
than when you wore

the Air Supply T-shirt
to the Aerosmith concert.

For God sakes, will you
just take the damn jersey off?

No. You know what? I like
rooting for the underdog, okay?

I am the underdog in real life.

I like Charlie Brown. I like
The Little Engine That Could.

I like the Bears.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Hey, I'm back.

Um, where's Fez?

Oh, I left him outside
like we always do.

But I like how you made him
come in and out

just to make him think
we weren't screwing with him.

Burn!

Kelso, we're not trying
to burn Fez.

We're just trying to
all watch the game together.

Okay, this is Kelso
you're talking to here.

All right, who's getting
burned? Is it me?

Because if it is,
I'll just let it happen.

No. No one's getting burned.
Now go out and get Fez.

All right, fine.

I'll go get Fez,
and you can just surprise me.

Okay, Steven,

certain people have implied that
I might still have feelings for you.

But I want you to know
that I don't.

In fact, now that I'm single, I
realize how big of a loser you are,

and I'm lucky to be rid of you.

So I'm gonna go and celebrate with
a giant gold-and-green cotton candy.

Man, what the hell
is her problem?

She's ruining the football game.

I'm gonna go tell her where
she can stick that cotton candy.

This is a very
angry section we're in.

Very angry.

Oh, it's not that bad. I mean, I've
been wearing this jersey 10 minutes

and nothing that bad
has happened.

Although, I did
just sit in nachos.

Good one, Red.

All right, Kitty, I think we need to talk
about what happened in the kitchen.

Yeah, what the heck
were you doing, Bob?

I haven't been goosed like
that since we won the war.

I thought you were falling.

I wasn't falling. Why would
you think I was falling?

You said "Oh, jeez,"

and that's what I say when
I'm gonna fall. Oh, jeez.

I just said that because I couldn't
find your damn refried beans.

- And both hands, Bob?
- I needed leverage.

Well, all I know is
we have to keep this a secret.

If Red finds out,
he'll cut your hands off.

Fine. We won't say
another word about it.

Although, about it,
may I say, bravo.

Jane Fonda.

Hey, what happened with Jackie?

Huh?

Oh, nothing.
I didn't find her.

You might want to go look for
her, though, by the snack bar,

behind the pillar, concourse A.

Is that close to
the ice cream guy?

I think so.

All right, I'll go.

Hyde, we need help.

This whole ticket thing
is like calculus to us.

Okay, Kelso is outside
with two ticket stubs.

What?

How did you get in?

Oh, there's a hole in the fence.

Come on.

Well, the Bears have pretty much
lost the game, so why don't you get lost?

Look, I think
you've made your point.

Yes, he's wearing a Bears
jersey, but he's my son.

Son or daughter?

All right, that's enough.

No, you know what? You can say
anything you want about me, okay?

It's not gonna bother me.

Yeah, stay out of this, baldy.

Okay, you can shut up
about my dad.

Oh, well, who's gonna make me?

I am.

No, wait, I am.

Eric's in a fight.

No one's here.
No one's gonna believe me.

Why didn't I bring my camera?

Today was a miserable day.

Now I want to hire Martina
back just so I can fire her again.

You know what might
make you feel better?

If you go wait in the car while I
go watch the rest of the game.

No, that's okay.
You can come with me.

Great.

I'm vicious, all right!

I will tear that ass up!

Look at him go.
He's got the Forman rage.

Get off of me.

Come on. Let's go tell
your mom about our day.

Oh, hey, where'd you learn all
those fighting moves, by the way?

Spider-Man.

I had to ask.

Hey, Donna, you know, Fez and I
are free if you want tickets to a movie.

Sure. But I only have enough
money for, like, two tickets.

No problem.
I know this thing we can do.

First, you take two tickets
and go inside,

and then we wait outside
and sneak through the fence.

Sounds foolproof.

We are gonna burn Fez so bad.

Well, this sucks.

'Cause before we'd just,
kind of, hang out, you know?

Yeah. Well, that was before.

Obviously, hanging out
doesn't work so well now.

Yeah.

- Want me to give
you a ride home?
- No, that's okay.

I don't mind.

No, I'll walk.

But thank you.

I can't believe you sat on my
couch with cheese on your pants.

Okay, listen, Mom, cheese on
my pants is just who I am now.

No more spending time
with your father.

He's turned you into an animal.

I can't believe
you got into a fight.

You know, I'm thinking about
becoming a boxer.

They may have to invent
a whole new weight class.

Hey, what's lighter
than a feather?

A Packer win, and the boy
defends the family name.

This is a great day
for the Formans.

I touched your wife's butt.

I made $10.