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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,335 --> 00:00:01,502 . 2 00:00:01,535 --> 00:00:02,002 - Cheese, what is it? 3 00:00:04,572 --> 00:00:07,508 Dried milk. - Uh, no. 4 00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:10,511 I don't think that's true. - It is. It is, Amy. 5 00:00:10,544 --> 00:00:12,046 It's in a PowerPoint. 6 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:14,315 - Now, we all know the standard cheeses. 7 00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:17,651 American cheese, cheddar cheese, pizza cheese. 8 00:00:17,685 --> 00:00:21,655 But what if I told you there's one more out there? 9 00:00:21,689 --> 00:00:22,790 - Pepper jack? - No. 10 00:00:22,823 --> 00:00:24,292 - Gouda? - Swiss! 11 00:00:24,325 --> 00:00:26,660 - Kraft Singles. - Goat, Parm, blue, ricotta. 12 00:00:26,694 --> 00:00:29,297 I could name at least ten more. - No, you guys, it's not-- 13 00:00:29,330 --> 00:00:32,100 - You know what's really good? Grilled cheese. 14 00:00:32,133 --> 00:00:33,667 - Hot tip, Kelly. 15 00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:36,070 - No, guys, stop just yelling out random words. 16 00:00:36,104 --> 00:00:39,273 You're throwing me off. 17 00:00:39,307 --> 00:00:44,278 But what if I told you there's one more out there? 18 00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:48,182 Human cheese! [all retch] 19 00:00:48,216 --> 00:00:50,218 - Oh, my God, is that what this is? 20 00:00:50,251 --> 00:00:52,286 - I've had five samples already. 21 00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:55,156 - No, no, this is just cut-up string cheese. 22 00:00:55,189 --> 00:00:56,624 I don't have enough money for a prototype. 23 00:00:56,657 --> 00:01:00,128 But it'll basically be exactly like that, I think. 24 00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:05,133 So who's ready to invest in the breast? 25 00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:07,835 It'll be udder-ly amazing! 26 00:01:07,868 --> 00:01:10,571 - That's cows. - Damn it, Sandra! 27 00:01:10,604 --> 00:01:13,741 [laughing] You're messing with my flow. 28 00:01:13,774 --> 00:01:15,609 Ugh. 29 00:01:16,844 --> 00:01:19,613 [exhales, shudders] 30 00:01:19,647 --> 00:01:21,615 [sniffs] 31 00:01:21,649 --> 00:01:25,219 Cheese, what is it? 32 00:01:25,253 --> 00:01:26,854 Dried milk. 33 00:01:26,887 --> 00:01:29,857 [upbeat music] 34 00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:32,893 * 35 00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:34,228 - Ooh. 36 00:01:34,262 --> 00:01:35,463 Just like a couple of plums 37 00:01:35,496 --> 00:01:37,231 nestled in a pair of Dockers, huh? 38 00:01:37,265 --> 00:01:39,367 - What? - Jonah's butt. 39 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,402 That you're staring at. - No, I'm not star-- 40 00:01:41,435 --> 00:01:44,605 I'm not staring at anything. - Oh, sorry. 41 00:01:44,638 --> 00:01:47,208 Just, you told me about your crush on Jonah, 42 00:01:47,241 --> 00:01:48,576 and I'm an ass gal, so I guess I just assume 43 00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:50,211 everyone's an ass gal-- - Shh, Dina! 44 00:01:50,244 --> 00:01:52,480 - What? - It's not a crush. 45 00:01:52,513 --> 00:01:53,814 And plus, I told you that in private. 46 00:01:53,847 --> 00:01:55,483 - But just so you know, 47 00:01:55,516 --> 00:01:57,451 Kelly's gonna start suspecting something 48 00:01:57,485 --> 00:01:59,253 if you keep lashing out at her. - What are you talking about? 49 00:01:59,287 --> 00:02:01,789 I don't lash out at Kelly. - [scoffs] 50 00:02:01,822 --> 00:02:03,457 Hey, Sandra, do you remember any time 51 00:02:03,491 --> 00:02:05,759 that Amy was lashing out at Kelly? 52 00:02:05,793 --> 00:02:08,362 - January 4th, you said, "Kelly, I assume you've been 53 00:02:08,396 --> 00:02:09,830 to a monster truck rally." 54 00:02:09,863 --> 00:02:12,466 January 12th, you said, "Two people saying you look 55 00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:14,568 like Reese Witherspoon is not a lot of people." 56 00:02:14,602 --> 00:02:16,170 - Okay, we got it. Thanks, Sandra. 57 00:02:16,204 --> 00:02:17,638 - January 20th, you said, 58 00:02:17,671 --> 00:02:19,640 "Wow, did they teach you that at pageant school?" 59 00:02:19,673 --> 00:02:21,309 January 21st, you said, 60 00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:22,643 "Wow, did they teach you that at pageant school?" 61 00:02:22,676 --> 00:02:24,378 - Okay, we got it Sandra. Thank you. 62 00:02:24,412 --> 00:02:27,415 - * The music's on 63 00:02:27,448 --> 00:02:32,186 * Oh, baby, dance with me, yeah * 64 00:02:33,921 --> 00:02:35,589 - Kelly! - Hi. 65 00:02:35,623 --> 00:02:36,457 - Kelly, Kelly, Kelly. 66 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:38,492 - Sorry, I'm working as fast as I can. 67 00:02:38,526 --> 00:02:41,229 I just have a few more left. - Oh, no, no worries. 68 00:02:41,262 --> 00:02:42,396 I'm not here to rush you, 69 00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:44,398 I just came over to say, "Hey, girl." 70 00:02:44,432 --> 00:02:46,867 - Oh, "Hey, girl" back. 71 00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,702 Hey, girl. 72 00:02:49,803 --> 00:02:53,941 - Yep, just, um, came on over to hang out with my friend. 73 00:02:53,974 --> 00:02:55,943 - We're friends? 74 00:02:55,976 --> 00:02:57,378 I mean, sorry, it's just sometimes 75 00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:59,347 it seems like you don't like me. 76 00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,215 - Oh, you mean because sometimes I razz you? 77 00:03:01,249 --> 00:03:04,585 Oh, my God, Kel, you know I'm, like, the joker of the store. 78 00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:06,887 - Because you wear all that lipstick? 79 00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:09,423 - It's just gloss, and I only wear a little bit of it. 80 00:03:09,457 --> 00:03:11,359 No, because I joke around with everyone, 81 00:03:11,392 --> 00:03:14,328 especially my friends. - Really? 82 00:03:14,362 --> 00:03:16,630 - Yes, of course. 83 00:03:16,664 --> 00:03:17,998 You cutie. 84 00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:21,435 [items crashing] 85 00:03:22,970 --> 00:03:24,972 - Oh! 86 00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:27,308 - Someone's in trouble. 87 00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:29,610 - Oh, my God. I hung that sign. 88 00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:32,680 - Well, it was probably just a faulty anchor. 89 00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:33,781 - What anchor? 90 00:03:33,814 --> 00:03:37,718 - You didn't bolt the anchor? - There's bolts too? 91 00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:40,954 - Guys, I'm telling you, the human mammary dairy market 92 00:03:40,988 --> 00:03:42,690 is about to explode. 93 00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:47,428 - Question: if I invest, can I still eat regular cheese? 94 00:03:47,461 --> 00:03:48,862 - Dude. [laughs] 95 00:03:48,896 --> 00:03:49,863 No. 96 00:03:49,897 --> 00:03:51,499 Hey, how about you guys? 97 00:03:51,532 --> 00:03:54,535 Who's ready to join the boob cheese revolution? 98 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:57,605 - Uh, sorry, I was distracted. 99 00:03:57,638 --> 00:03:59,673 That guy has a real gay Dothraki vibe going, 100 00:03:59,707 --> 00:04:01,775 and #IntoIt. 101 00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:03,611 - You should go help him. - You want me to just 102 00:04:03,644 --> 00:04:06,947 go up there and talk to him? - It's literally your job. 103 00:04:06,980 --> 00:04:12,786 - [chanting] Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. 104 00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:15,923 Do you guys just hate chants? Be honest with me. 105 00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:17,491 - I am so screwed. 106 00:04:17,525 --> 00:04:18,726 This is, like, my third screwup this week. 107 00:04:18,759 --> 00:04:20,461 I'm gonna get in so much trouble. 108 00:04:20,494 --> 00:04:23,664 - What happened? Who put this up? 109 00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:27,468 - Um, Glenn, I-- 110 00:04:27,501 --> 00:04:29,603 - It was me. I did it. 111 00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:31,705 - Amy, you don't have to-- - It's okay, girl. I got you. 112 00:04:31,739 --> 00:04:35,343 - Amy, you did this? - Mm-hmm, yeah. 113 00:04:35,376 --> 00:04:39,347 I was just rushing, and I forgot to anchor the bolt. 114 00:04:39,380 --> 00:04:41,582 - So you used duct tape? 115 00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:44,385 - Yes, I did. 116 00:04:44,418 --> 00:04:47,054 I really, really didn't think that one through. 117 00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:48,922 - Okay, but... 118 00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:51,792 you got to be careful. These things are heavy. 119 00:04:51,825 --> 00:04:53,093 - Yes. 120 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:57,030 - Clean it up. - I will. Will do. 121 00:04:57,064 --> 00:04:58,566 - Thank you so much. 122 00:04:58,599 --> 00:05:00,668 You did not have to take the blame for me. 123 00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:02,936 - It's totally fine. I got you, girl. 124 00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:05,406 It's all good, friend. - Aw. 125 00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:08,609 - And plus, no one got hurt, so no biggie. 126 00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:11,879 - Hey. 127 00:05:11,912 --> 00:05:13,381 Don't you hate Tuesdays? 128 00:05:13,414 --> 00:05:15,416 [screams] 129 00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:18,819 . 130 00:05:18,852 --> 00:05:19,820 - Why would you take the blame for Kelly's mistake? 131 00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:23,891 - Look, I was trying to show her that we're friends. 132 00:05:23,924 --> 00:05:26,494 - Oh, this is about the Jonah crush. 133 00:05:26,527 --> 00:05:27,928 - Shh. - Man, that secret 134 00:05:27,961 --> 00:05:30,431 just keeps getting tastier and tastier. 135 00:05:30,464 --> 00:05:32,500 Mmm, that is one good secret. 136 00:05:32,533 --> 00:05:34,435 - Okay, that's enough. Look, can you please 137 00:05:34,468 --> 00:05:35,769 just not tell anyone? 138 00:05:35,803 --> 00:05:37,771 - Hey, like I said, you can count on me. 139 00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:39,407 And if you want to sell the lie, 140 00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:42,075 I will sell this lie hard. 141 00:05:42,109 --> 00:05:44,578 [slurping] 142 00:05:44,612 --> 00:05:46,580 - What--what--what-- what are you doing? 143 00:05:46,614 --> 00:05:47,848 - I'm trying to work up enough saliva 144 00:05:47,881 --> 00:05:49,517 so that we can do a spit handshake. 145 00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:50,551 It's just, I've got such drymouth. 146 00:05:50,584 --> 00:05:51,685 I think it's the pregnancy. 147 00:05:51,719 --> 00:05:52,820 - Oh, don't worry about it. 148 00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:54,121 We're good. - No, no, no, no. 149 00:05:54,154 --> 00:05:55,689 Just give me a second. I'll get there. 150 00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:57,691 [spit bubbles] - Oh, God, okay. 151 00:05:57,725 --> 00:05:59,960 No, Dina, really, I'm good. I trust you. 152 00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:01,595 - Well, now I'm like a sprinkler. 153 00:06:01,629 --> 00:06:03,130 It won't stop coming out. [spits] 154 00:06:03,163 --> 00:06:04,732 - Does it hurt when you rotate it? 155 00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:06,066 - Of course it does. 156 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:08,436 I got assaulted by a giant pot of gold. 157 00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:10,070 Everything hurts. - Hey, man. 158 00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:12,005 When I cut off my thumb with the deli slicer, 159 00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:15,476 corporate gave me 200 bucks just for promising not to sue. 160 00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:18,746 - When I shattered my nose, I held out and got $1,000. 161 00:06:18,779 --> 00:06:21,081 - Wait, you can negotiate? 162 00:06:21,114 --> 00:06:22,583 No one told me that I can negotiate. 163 00:06:22,616 --> 00:06:23,984 - Man, you should have held out. 164 00:06:24,017 --> 00:06:25,453 You could have already launched Boob Cheese. 165 00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:26,654 - Ugh... 166 00:06:26,687 --> 00:06:28,121 - I wonder how much I could get. 167 00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:29,990 I mean, I'm not a very good negotiator. 168 00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:32,125 I just always want people to like me. 169 00:06:32,159 --> 00:06:33,827 - Is that... 170 00:06:33,861 --> 00:06:35,529 true? - Yes! 171 00:06:35,563 --> 00:06:37,064 I'm nice. - Well, if you want, 172 00:06:37,097 --> 00:06:39,467 I could help you with the negotiation. 173 00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:40,868 - Actually, that's not a bad idea. 174 00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:42,670 I mean, you are relentless and annoying. 175 00:06:42,703 --> 00:06:45,839 - I was going to say because I took a year of business school, 176 00:06:45,873 --> 00:06:47,541 but I will take that as a compliment. 177 00:06:47,575 --> 00:06:50,143 - It's not, but, you know, you hear what you want to hear. 178 00:06:50,177 --> 00:06:52,546 - You are nice. - Maybe I should get hurt again 179 00:06:52,580 --> 00:06:53,914 and hold out for that big money. 180 00:06:53,947 --> 00:06:56,917 - Mm-hmm, I definitely think that's a good idea. 181 00:06:57,651 --> 00:06:59,019 - I feel so bad. I didn't know 182 00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:01,755 Mateo was gonna get hurt when you took the blame. 183 00:07:01,789 --> 00:07:03,857 - Don't worry about it. It's like I said. 184 00:07:03,891 --> 00:07:06,093 We're friends, and, you know, it's like, 185 00:07:06,126 --> 00:07:08,729 bitches before snitches, you know? 186 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:09,963 - Well, I am taking you out 187 00:07:09,997 --> 00:07:11,899 for drinks tonight as a thank-you. 188 00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:14,835 You, me, half-off margaritas. Like I always say, 189 00:07:14,868 --> 00:07:17,104 there's nothing a little dancing on a bar can't solve. 190 00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:20,908 - Wow, did they teach you that in pageant sch... 191 00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:24,044 I mean, that is very wise and well-observed. 192 00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:26,179 I'm very excited. 193 00:07:26,213 --> 00:07:28,181 - Hey, don't you help her. 194 00:07:28,215 --> 00:07:30,751 This was Amy's mess, and she needs to clean it up herself, 195 00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:32,653 or she will never learn. 196 00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:33,887 - I'll just text you tonight 197 00:07:33,921 --> 00:07:36,857 about what I'm thinking of wearing. 198 00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:40,227 - See, she does not suspect a thing. 199 00:07:40,260 --> 00:07:42,195 [laughs] All right. 200 00:07:42,229 --> 00:07:45,198 Clean this up for real. 201 00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:47,167 - One... 202 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:49,603 two... 203 00:07:49,637 --> 00:07:51,505 Nope. 204 00:07:54,675 --> 00:07:56,143 Damn it! 205 00:07:56,176 --> 00:07:59,980 Uh, just trying to cut off my thumb. 206 00:08:01,849 --> 00:08:04,084 - I'm sorry, why is Jonah here? 207 00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:06,053 - Oh, I'm just here to give Mateo advice. 208 00:08:06,086 --> 00:08:07,788 I went to business school for a year. 209 00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:09,823 - Before flunking out. - Irrelevant. 210 00:08:09,857 --> 00:08:12,225 - Fine, okay. Uh, for the record, 211 00:08:12,259 --> 00:08:14,862 I should point out that Mateo and I previously had 212 00:08:14,895 --> 00:08:16,229 a romantic relationship, but I'm confident 213 00:08:16,263 --> 00:08:17,965 that we can keep everything professional. 214 00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:19,166 - I would also like the record to reflect 215 00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:20,968 that your outfit makes you look like 216 00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,936 the assistant debate coach of an Ohio middle school. 217 00:08:22,970 --> 00:08:25,105 - Your objection is noted. 218 00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:28,809 Okay, uh, without accepting any liability for your injury, 219 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,911 Cloud 9 would like to offer you $1,000. 220 00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:33,847 - I'll take this. [inhales] 221 00:08:33,881 --> 00:08:35,816 No. - No? 222 00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:37,117 What do you mean, no? You don't want the money? 223 00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:39,987 - Oh, we want the money, Jeff. 224 00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:42,322 But we want the real money. - Yes. 225 00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:46,594 - Okay, well, that is the real money. 226 00:08:46,627 --> 00:08:49,930 The offer is $1,000. Take it or leave it. 227 00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:56,236 - We will take the $1,000. 228 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:57,771 [clears throat] 229 00:08:57,805 --> 00:08:59,640 - Ah! 230 00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:01,609 - Hey, Amy. 231 00:09:01,642 --> 00:09:04,011 I thought I'd have Sandra work with you. 232 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,614 - Oh, no, that's okay. I got this. 233 00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:09,249 - Yeah, but wouldn't it be nice to have some company? 234 00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:13,220 You know, someone to help you and watch over you? 235 00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:16,624 - Oh, okay. I see. 236 00:09:16,657 --> 00:09:18,191 - What? It's not that I don't trust you 237 00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:21,729 or that I'm worried that you'll injure someone else. 238 00:09:21,762 --> 00:09:24,031 - No, no, of course not. 239 00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:26,800 I mean, you just said it wasn't those things, 240 00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:28,769 so it's probably not those things. 241 00:09:28,802 --> 00:09:30,270 - Right. 242 00:09:30,303 --> 00:09:32,806 It's a different reason. 243 00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:34,341 - Like? 244 00:09:36,109 --> 00:09:39,079 - I will tell you later. - Yep. 245 00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:41,915 - Check issued upon completion of background check? 246 00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:43,884 [stammers] What does that mean? 247 00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,252 - Mm, that seems pretty standard. 248 00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:46,754 They probably just want to make sure 249 00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:48,956 you didn't do anything illegal. 250 00:09:48,989 --> 00:09:53,193 - Illegal, like being in this country illegally? 251 00:09:53,226 --> 00:09:55,963 - All right, I just got off the phone with corporate, 252 00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:57,831 and things are all good on their end. 253 00:09:57,865 --> 00:10:00,367 Are you done signing? 254 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:03,704 - Uh, um... 255 00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:06,674 you know what? I have decided to pass. 256 00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,709 - We're gonna pass. 257 00:10:08,742 --> 00:10:10,844 - What? - Yeah, so... 258 00:10:10,878 --> 00:10:12,379 I mean, no need for any of this. 259 00:10:12,412 --> 00:10:14,014 - Mm-mm. - Um... 260 00:10:14,047 --> 00:10:16,917 I'm gonna go, and, um... 261 00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,753 good luck to you in all your future endeavors. 262 00:10:19,787 --> 00:10:21,188 Excuse me. 263 00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:23,123 - Sorry the deal fell through. 264 00:10:23,156 --> 00:10:24,958 Lot of great back-and-forth, though. 265 00:10:24,992 --> 00:10:28,328 Good sparring with you, buddy. All right. 266 00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:31,965 - Just go. Just go. Just go when you say go. 267 00:10:31,999 --> 00:10:35,102 Just go when you say the word "go." 268 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:38,305 Go on the word "go." 269 00:10:38,338 --> 00:10:39,707 Go! 270 00:10:39,740 --> 00:10:41,008 Ahh, damn it! 271 00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:43,911 Damn it! Bad! 272 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:51,118 - Compromising safety harness. - I was just loosening it. 273 00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:52,886 - Okay, but now you're not secure. 274 00:10:52,920 --> 00:10:55,055 - I am secure, Sandra. And also, could you, like, 275 00:10:55,088 --> 00:10:57,357 maybe move, like, two inches that way? 276 00:10:57,390 --> 00:10:58,692 You're in my space. 277 00:10:58,726 --> 00:11:00,127 - Glenn told me to stay close to you. 278 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:01,795 And also, I'm terrified of heights, 279 00:11:01,829 --> 00:11:03,263 so I feel like the ground is always just kind of 280 00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:05,265 coming up at me-- - Okay, fine, fine. 281 00:11:05,298 --> 00:11:07,868 It's just making this a lot more difficult. 282 00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:11,739 Oh! - Almost dropped sign. 283 00:11:11,772 --> 00:11:13,340 - Almost? Are you serious? 284 00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:15,342 You're writing down almost mistakes now? 285 00:11:15,375 --> 00:11:16,977 - Now you're losing your temper. 286 00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:18,345 - No, I'm not losing my temper, Sandra. 287 00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:19,980 I just don't think that you need to be writing down 288 00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:21,281 every single little thing. - Stop! 289 00:11:21,314 --> 00:11:22,883 - No, you stop it. - Glenn gave that to me! 290 00:11:22,916 --> 00:11:24,351 - Back up, Sandra. - We're moving! 291 00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:26,119 We're going to die! - Oh, my God! 292 00:11:26,153 --> 00:11:27,420 I need you to back up-- - [screaming, crying] 293 00:11:27,454 --> 00:11:28,856 - Sandra, you're on me! 294 00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:30,257 Sandra, you're pushing me into the lever! 295 00:11:30,290 --> 00:11:32,392 Sandra, snap out of it! - [screaming, crying] 296 00:11:36,063 --> 00:11:38,398 - Bloopers on a TV show are delightful. 297 00:11:38,431 --> 00:11:42,002 But in the workplace, they can be dangerous. 298 00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,403 So I thought that some of us 299 00:11:43,436 --> 00:11:45,438 who have had a couple of incidents 300 00:11:45,472 --> 00:11:47,975 could review some basic safety training. 301 00:11:48,008 --> 00:11:50,944 Now, when would you put out one of these? 302 00:11:50,978 --> 00:11:53,246 - On the holidays? - No. 303 00:11:57,017 --> 00:11:57,317 . 304 00:11:57,350 --> 00:11:58,218 - Now, when you're cleaning up that spill, 305 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:01,088 you want a nice swaying motion. 306 00:12:01,121 --> 00:12:03,390 Think of it like you took your mop to a dance. 307 00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:05,793 Okay, and dance with her. 308 00:12:05,826 --> 00:12:07,394 [waltz music playing] One, two, three. 309 00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:08,528 One, two, three. 310 00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,931 One, two, three. One, two, three. 311 00:12:10,964 --> 00:12:18,005 * 312 00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:25,312 - Okay, all right. 313 00:12:25,345 --> 00:12:28,015 [ladder creaks] Whoa! 314 00:12:28,048 --> 00:12:30,217 [shudders] - What are you doing? 315 00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:32,920 - I'm trying to get injured. 316 00:12:32,953 --> 00:12:35,856 It's just hard to make myself do it. 317 00:12:35,889 --> 00:12:37,825 - You know, the problem is, you can see it coming. 318 00:12:37,858 --> 00:12:39,960 - Yes, obviously that's the problem. 319 00:12:39,993 --> 00:12:42,462 - You know, maybe, and I'm just spitballing here, 320 00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:44,564 but maybe you have someone else do it 321 00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:47,200 so you're not expecting it. 322 00:12:47,234 --> 00:12:50,137 - That's not a bad idea. 323 00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:51,371 Do you think you could do it? 324 00:12:51,404 --> 00:12:53,540 - [laughing] Me? Wow. 325 00:12:53,573 --> 00:12:57,377 Whoof, that's unexpected. [laughs] 326 00:12:57,410 --> 00:13:00,814 Hmm, yeah, I'll do it. I'd be honored. 327 00:13:00,848 --> 00:13:02,449 - I can't believe I have to walk away from $1,000 328 00:13:02,482 --> 00:13:04,818 just because I'm undocumented. - It's so unfair. 329 00:13:04,852 --> 00:13:06,486 This country was built on the backs of immigrants-- 330 00:13:06,519 --> 00:13:08,321 - Okay, calm down. I can tell my own story. 331 00:13:08,355 --> 00:13:10,490 - And you should be able to. - Okay. 332 00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:14,261 I just spoke to corporate. This one time, 333 00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:17,064 they're willing to go up to $1,500. 334 00:13:17,097 --> 00:13:19,933 Final offer, no exceptions. - [scoffs] 335 00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:23,536 Unfortunately, I'm still gonna pass. 336 00:13:23,570 --> 00:13:27,574 - Okay, but $1,500 is as high as they're willing to go. 337 00:13:27,607 --> 00:13:29,576 I mean, it's $1,500. You understand that, right? 338 00:13:29,609 --> 00:13:32,145 - I understand. The answer is still no. 339 00:13:32,179 --> 00:13:34,882 - Okay, okay, fine, fine. 340 00:13:34,915 --> 00:13:35,582 $4,000. 341 00:13:35,615 --> 00:13:36,950 - Whoa! - Holy crap. 342 00:13:36,984 --> 00:13:38,218 - And that's it. That's it, though. 343 00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:39,920 That's the cap. 344 00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:42,555 - I thought $1,500 was the cap. - That was the fake cap. 345 00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:45,025 Technically, we're allowed to go as high as $4,000, 346 00:13:45,058 --> 00:13:47,394 but that is it. That's the final offer. 347 00:13:47,427 --> 00:13:49,362 - I'm sorry, Jeff, okay? It's still-- 348 00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:50,931 - $6,500, final offer. 349 00:13:50,964 --> 00:13:52,499 - I feel like we have different definitions 350 00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:54,267 of the word "final." - It's not about the money. 351 00:13:54,301 --> 00:13:57,537 Okay, the answer is no. - Wow, okay, great. 352 00:13:57,570 --> 00:14:01,875 Congratulations, you just lost out on $6,500. 353 00:14:01,909 --> 00:14:04,144 Sweet dreams thinking about that. 354 00:14:06,313 --> 00:14:08,315 $15,000. 355 00:14:08,348 --> 00:14:10,417 [waltz music playing] 356 00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:13,586 - Amy? Hey, it's Jessie. 357 00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:18,325 I'm Cindy's mom. - Oh, yeah, of course, hi. 358 00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,894 - I heard about you and Adam, 359 00:14:20,928 --> 00:14:22,595 and I just wanted to say I hope everything's okay. 360 00:14:22,629 --> 00:14:25,665 - Oh, yeah, no, everything's great, actually. 361 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:27,935 Thanks for checking. - Amy? 362 00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:30,337 I need a urine sample from you. 363 00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:33,206 - Oh, um, I'm sorry, I can just-- 364 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:36,376 - No, Dina, this isn't really the best time for this. 365 00:14:36,409 --> 00:14:37,410 - Hey, that's what happens when you keep 366 00:14:37,444 --> 00:14:38,912 screwing up on the job. 367 00:14:38,946 --> 00:14:40,313 We have to find out if it's due to drugs 368 00:14:40,347 --> 00:14:41,982 or just gross incompetence. 369 00:14:42,015 --> 00:14:44,017 * 370 00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:47,087 - It's not drugs. - [laughs] 371 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:51,424 - Hey, this was lovely. So see you at the next PTA. 372 00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:54,261 - Hi, David, I have Mateo Liwanag, 373 00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:57,931 the employee who was injured, and Jonah Simms, 374 00:14:57,965 --> 00:15:00,300 another employee, for some reason. 375 00:15:00,333 --> 00:15:01,601 - Hey, Mateo, I hear you're refusing 376 00:15:01,634 --> 00:15:03,136 to sign the liability waiver. 377 00:15:03,170 --> 00:15:04,404 A little concerned your lawyer's 378 00:15:04,437 --> 00:15:05,405 giving you some bad advice. 379 00:15:05,438 --> 00:15:06,974 - Oh, I'm not a lawyer. 380 00:15:07,007 --> 00:15:08,942 I just went to a year of business school. 381 00:15:08,976 --> 00:15:11,511 - Before flunking out. - I'm on your side, you know. 382 00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:14,414 - So look, we're prepared to offer you $50,000. 383 00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:17,217 - $50,000? - Whoa. 384 00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:18,518 - Uh... 385 00:15:18,551 --> 00:15:20,720 that is a lot of money. - Uh, uh-huh. 386 00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:24,324 - And I wish I could take it. But the truth is, 387 00:15:24,357 --> 00:15:26,726 um, I'm not really hurt. 388 00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:29,196 - David, he's lying. - I'm lying? 389 00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:31,598 What about all the times you said you were over Chad 390 00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:33,066 and you just jumped right back into bed with him? 391 00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:35,235 - After you dumped me! I'm sorry, David. 392 00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:37,204 That's not relevant. - That's okay. 393 00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:39,639 I have a gay son, so my views are very progressive. 394 00:15:39,672 --> 00:15:41,174 - Okay, what about the time you said Jonah 395 00:15:41,208 --> 00:15:42,575 looks great in shirts? 396 00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:44,544 Yeah, were you lying or telling the truth then? 397 00:15:44,577 --> 00:15:46,346 - I said he looks okay in shirts, 398 00:15:46,379 --> 00:15:48,481 but you wouldn't know that because you never listen. 399 00:15:48,515 --> 00:15:50,083 - Because you add unnecessary details! 400 00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:52,619 - You spent an hour talking about lavender! 401 00:15:52,652 --> 00:15:54,221 - Uh, it sounds like you guys 402 00:15:54,254 --> 00:15:55,755 still have some stuff to figure out. 403 00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:57,290 Jeff, why don't you take care of this 404 00:15:57,324 --> 00:15:59,026 and get back to me later, okay? 405 00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:00,093 Thanks. 406 00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:04,664 - Well... 407 00:16:04,697 --> 00:16:06,966 that got silly. 408 00:16:08,135 --> 00:16:09,236 - 'Sup, Marcus? 409 00:16:09,269 --> 00:16:11,271 Something's jammed in the box crusher. 410 00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:14,374 I was wondering if you could climb in and get it out. 411 00:16:14,407 --> 00:16:16,609 - You want me to get... 412 00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:19,712 inside the box crusher? - Yeah, thanks. 413 00:16:21,281 --> 00:16:25,252 - It just--it feels like a box crusher could hurt someone 414 00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:27,087 really badly. 415 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,422 - Only if somebody pushed the button 416 00:16:29,456 --> 00:16:31,691 while you were inside it. 417 00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:33,193 There's no need to worry about that, 418 00:16:33,226 --> 00:16:35,762 'cause I got the button right here. 419 00:16:37,230 --> 00:16:40,133 - Yeah, okay. 420 00:16:40,167 --> 00:16:41,534 [whistle blows] - Sandra, your tushie 421 00:16:41,568 --> 00:16:43,270 needs to be closer to the ground. 422 00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:46,506 - I can't go any lower. - Okay, I don't want excuses. 423 00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:48,475 I want lower tushies. 424 00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:51,544 - Ugh, I can't believe they're making you do this. 425 00:16:51,578 --> 00:16:53,780 - Yeah, no, me and you both. 426 00:16:53,813 --> 00:16:56,483 - Elias, bend both your knees, not just the one. 427 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:59,286 - I just feel so guilty. I mean, I almost feel like 428 00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:01,154 maybe I should tell Glenn that I was the one 429 00:17:01,188 --> 00:17:02,689 that messed up the signs. 430 00:17:02,722 --> 00:17:04,691 - Well, I mean, you know, don't do it for me. 431 00:17:04,724 --> 00:17:06,426 But, like, if you really want to. 432 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:08,828 - Yeah, you're right, there's probably no point. 433 00:17:08,861 --> 00:17:11,264 - Oh, did I say there was no point? 434 00:17:11,298 --> 00:17:13,166 I don't remember saying those words. 435 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:14,734 - Oh, I just-- I'm getting in my head, then. 436 00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:16,703 Sometimes I do that thing where I act like 437 00:17:16,736 --> 00:17:18,638 every mistake in the world is my fault. 438 00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:20,473 - Yeah, except for this time, 439 00:17:20,507 --> 00:17:22,109 you wouldn't really be that far off. 440 00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:24,177 - [laughs] Although it's like, 441 00:17:24,211 --> 00:17:26,279 I didn't make you crash the scissor lift. 442 00:17:26,313 --> 00:17:28,181 - No, no. - Uh-uh. 443 00:17:28,215 --> 00:17:30,750 - But technically, I wouldn't have been on the scissor lift 444 00:17:30,783 --> 00:17:32,852 if you hadn't messed up the signs. 445 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:35,422 - I know, and then it's like, technically, 446 00:17:35,455 --> 00:17:37,857 I wouldn't have even been hanging the signs at all 447 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:41,694 if Saint Patrick hadn't driven the snakes out of Ireland, so... 448 00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:43,463 How far back do we go? 449 00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:45,198 - Um... 450 00:17:45,232 --> 00:17:47,100 probably somewhere between the fifth century 451 00:17:47,134 --> 00:17:49,136 and this morning, I'm guessing. 452 00:17:49,169 --> 00:17:51,371 - [laughs] Right, yeah. 453 00:17:58,211 --> 00:17:58,345 . 454 00:17:58,378 --> 00:17:59,212 - I can't take this safety training anymore. 455 00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:01,714 - Hey, I get it. It's tough, 456 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:03,150 especially when you get to your age. 457 00:18:03,183 --> 00:18:04,617 Do you feel like you can't keep up? 458 00:18:04,651 --> 00:18:07,120 - No, I mean I'm over taking the blame for Kelly's mistake. 459 00:18:07,154 --> 00:18:08,821 - Well, let's tell Glenn the truth and bury this chick! 460 00:18:08,855 --> 00:18:12,325 - Yeah, but I can't just, like, throw her under the bus. 461 00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:14,227 - Are you sure? 'Cause I have security footage 462 00:18:14,261 --> 00:18:16,429 of her hanging the sign. It wouldn't be hard. 463 00:18:16,463 --> 00:18:19,799 - Yes, but morally... 464 00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:21,734 Although, you know, it's not like she would 465 00:18:21,768 --> 00:18:23,436 get in that much trouble, right? 466 00:18:23,470 --> 00:18:25,372 And all we'd be doing is telling the truth. 467 00:18:25,405 --> 00:18:27,207 So if anything, lying in the first place 468 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,908 was the wrong thing to do, right? 469 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:30,443 - You'd already made up your mind about this 470 00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:32,212 before you even came in here, hadn't you? 471 00:18:32,245 --> 00:18:34,414 - Yeah, I was thinking maybe you could show the footage 472 00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:36,183 while I tried to stop you so it'd look like 473 00:18:36,216 --> 00:18:37,884 my hands were clean. I told everyone to meet, 474 00:18:37,917 --> 00:18:40,453 like, around 3:00? - Nice. 475 00:18:40,487 --> 00:18:42,455 [door closes] 476 00:18:42,489 --> 00:18:45,192 She's growing up. 477 00:18:47,294 --> 00:18:49,362 - No, uh-uh, I can't do it. 478 00:18:49,396 --> 00:18:51,864 I can't. I still know it's coming. 479 00:18:51,898 --> 00:18:53,933 And to be honest... 480 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,735 you're freaking me out. 481 00:18:55,768 --> 00:18:57,404 - You know what? I feel you. 482 00:18:57,437 --> 00:18:59,206 So here's what we're gonna do. 483 00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:02,442 It's not gonna come today, not even this week. 484 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:04,944 Months will go by. You'll forget all about it. 485 00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:07,480 And then one day, out of the blue... 486 00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:08,815 [metal clangs] 487 00:19:08,848 --> 00:19:11,318 You're rich. - I don't know if that-- 488 00:19:11,351 --> 00:19:14,187 - Even if you tell me you want to call it off, 489 00:19:14,221 --> 00:19:16,356 I'll say okay, but I'll know you don't really want that. 490 00:19:16,389 --> 00:19:18,925 You're just trying to make yourself forget it's coming. 491 00:19:18,958 --> 00:19:21,961 It'll never really be called off, ever. 492 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,831 That's how much I care about getting you this money. 493 00:19:27,367 --> 00:19:30,537 - [exhales] - Mateo, I'm not stupid. 494 00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:33,640 I know why you're doing this. - You do? 495 00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:35,442 - Yeah, why waste an opportunity 496 00:19:35,475 --> 00:19:38,278 to make me look incompetent in front of my bosses, right? 497 00:19:38,311 --> 00:19:41,414 - Oh. I mean no, that's not what-- 498 00:19:41,448 --> 00:19:44,451 - Okay, well, you may hate me, but I still care about you. 499 00:19:44,484 --> 00:19:48,421 So there. 10 grand. You're welcome. 500 00:19:48,455 --> 00:19:50,423 - $10,000? I thought it was $50,000. 501 00:19:50,457 --> 00:19:52,659 Doesn't matter. Okay...[stammers] 502 00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:55,262 Jeff, I don't want this. - Well, you're taking it. 503 00:19:55,295 --> 00:19:56,996 I'm faxing the paperwork to legal right now. 504 00:19:57,029 --> 00:20:00,400 - Oh, no, no, no, no, no, you can't--you can't do that. 505 00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:01,934 - Why not? 506 00:20:01,968 --> 00:20:04,537 - It's complicated. - I was in love with you. 507 00:20:04,571 --> 00:20:06,473 And you dumped me out of the blue, 508 00:20:06,506 --> 00:20:08,808 so unless there's some reason I just can't get my-- 509 00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:10,977 - I'm undocumented! 510 00:20:12,979 --> 00:20:14,881 That's why I couldn't transfer stores. 511 00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:16,549 That's why I can't take the money. 512 00:20:16,583 --> 00:20:17,717 And that's why I couldn't go 513 00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:20,019 on a Carnival cruise with your family. 514 00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,721 But also, like... 515 00:20:21,754 --> 00:20:24,357 cruises are gross. 516 00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:27,560 - So wait. 517 00:20:27,594 --> 00:20:30,597 - I never hated you. 518 00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:32,532 - I thought it'd be helpful for us all to watch 519 00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:34,467 the surveillance footage of Amy hanging the sign 520 00:20:34,501 --> 00:20:37,003 that fell on Mateo so we can learn what not to do. 521 00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:38,971 - Wait, what? - No, I don't think 522 00:20:39,005 --> 00:20:40,407 we need to watch this video, Dina. 523 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:43,510 - Well, I do. So we are. 524 00:20:43,543 --> 00:20:46,746 - I'm so sorry. I don't know what else to do. 525 00:20:46,779 --> 00:20:48,915 Um, that's the wrong file. 526 00:20:48,948 --> 00:20:50,317 - That's from Glenn's mullet phase. 527 00:20:50,350 --> 00:20:51,784 That was, like, four years ago. 528 00:20:51,818 --> 00:20:54,521 - I can't stand this new system. I can't find anything. 529 00:20:54,554 --> 00:20:56,389 - Whoa, is that from the tornado? 530 00:20:56,423 --> 00:20:58,425 - Oh, uh, you know what-- - Uh, Dina, 531 00:20:58,458 --> 00:21:00,059 can you turn off the video, please? 532 00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:01,561 - No, Amy, it's not your decision. 533 00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:02,995 - No, I'm not kidding. Turn off the video. 534 00:21:03,029 --> 00:21:04,297 - Hey, what are you doing? Step back. 535 00:21:04,331 --> 00:21:05,332 This is very sensitive equipment! 536 00:21:05,365 --> 00:21:06,633 - Dina, turn off the video! 537 00:21:06,666 --> 00:21:07,967 Stop the video! - What are you doing? 538 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,670 - Whoa! [all gasp and ooh] 539 00:21:10,703 --> 00:21:13,606 [all murmuring] 540 00:21:17,944 --> 00:21:21,348 - I think everyone knows you like Jonah. 541 00:21:21,381 --> 00:21:22,949 - Mm-hmm. 40207

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