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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:16,916 --> 00:00:19,619 [funk music] 2 00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:21,821 - I say we gut this wall and go with 3 00:00:21,888 --> 00:00:23,456 a floor-to-ceiling window. 4 00:00:23,523 --> 00:00:26,426 - Keep talking about ways to maximize natural light, 5 00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:27,994 and we'll have to take this party upstairs. 6 00:00:28,061 --> 00:00:30,330 - Sounds great. Maybe we can have a three-way 7 00:00:30,396 --> 00:00:32,198 with my blinding period migraine. 8 00:00:32,265 --> 00:00:33,833 - I'll try anything once. 9 00:00:35,268 --> 00:00:37,070 - Ah! 10 00:00:37,137 --> 00:00:38,905 - What the hell are you doing? 11 00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:40,573 - Shut the door! 12 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:43,843 The cold breeze ain't helping me cross the goal line! 13 00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:44,878 - Oh, my God. 14 00:00:44,944 --> 00:00:46,346 Is that my new robe? 15 00:00:46,412 --> 00:00:47,814 - Not anymore! 16 00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:48,948 - Jesus Christ. 17 00:00:49,015 --> 00:00:50,350 Stop jerking off. 18 00:00:50,416 --> 00:00:52,185 - Say that again, but angrier. 19 00:00:52,252 --> 00:00:54,621 - Ugh. - [groans] 20 00:00:54,687 --> 00:00:56,256 Touchdown! 21 00:00:56,322 --> 00:00:59,492 Oh... 22 00:01:01,494 --> 00:01:03,630 So what's with the hard hats? 23 00:01:03,696 --> 00:01:05,565 - We're tearing down this shack, 24 00:01:05,632 --> 00:01:07,433 you vile, disgusting degenerate. 25 00:01:07,500 --> 00:01:09,235 - Harper, if you keep yelling at me 26 00:01:09,302 --> 00:01:11,070 with that domineering, degrading tone, 27 00:01:11,137 --> 00:01:12,372 I'm gonna climax again. 28 00:01:12,438 --> 00:01:14,340 - Anyway, we're gonna replace the old hut 29 00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:15,775 with a new structure. 30 00:01:15,842 --> 00:01:16,943 I prefer a dojo. 31 00:01:17,010 --> 00:01:18,611 - No, it will be a she-shed, 32 00:01:18,678 --> 00:01:21,214 where I can do meditation and yoga. 33 00:01:21,281 --> 00:01:23,249 - Ain't nobody touching this whack shack. 34 00:01:23,316 --> 00:01:26,753 Freaks, assemble! 35 00:01:26,819 --> 00:01:28,488 - [coughing] 36 00:01:28,555 --> 00:01:30,123 - We smoking? - [yelps] 37 00:01:30,190 --> 00:01:33,393 - These savages wanna knock down our whack shack 38 00:01:33,459 --> 00:01:36,563 and put up a meditation and yogurt store. 39 00:01:36,629 --> 00:01:39,432 - Listen, we-- we don't ask a lot. 40 00:01:39,499 --> 00:01:42,368 But this here structure has a tremendous amount 41 00:01:42,435 --> 00:01:45,338 of sentimental and nostalgic value. 42 00:01:45,405 --> 00:01:47,440 - And it's where we pull our puds. 43 00:01:47,507 --> 00:01:48,942 - It's not just a diddle den. 44 00:01:49,008 --> 00:01:51,744 It's also where I taught Freddy to make mac and cheese. 45 00:01:51,811 --> 00:01:53,980 Oh, that was a rough six months. 46 00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:57,850 - This orgasmic oasis means a lot to us. 47 00:01:57,917 --> 00:01:59,519 - Oh, I never knew that. 48 00:01:59,586 --> 00:02:03,389 Demolition starts on Thursday, fuckers. 49 00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:06,292 - This isn't over, you heartless land baron! 50 00:02:06,359 --> 00:02:08,528 - [giggling] 51 00:02:08,595 --> 00:02:10,530 Ooh. 52 00:02:10,597 --> 00:02:12,632 - I believe this is yours. 53 00:02:12,699 --> 00:02:13,800 - Ugh. 54 00:02:14,734 --> 00:02:17,403 - ♪ Good, mm-hmm ♪ 55 00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:19,839 ♪ Three brothers puffin' ♪ 56 00:02:19,906 --> 00:02:23,810 ♪ And we just woke up in year 2020 ♪ 57 00:02:23,876 --> 00:02:26,045 - ♪ Roll another J and forget the day ♪ 58 00:02:26,112 --> 00:02:28,848 ♪ Roll another J and get high ♪ 59 00:02:28,915 --> 00:02:31,985 ♪ Roll another J and forget the day ♪ 60 00:02:32,051 --> 00:02:34,254 ♪ Me and my brothers getting fried ♪ 61 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,856 - ♪ The Freak Brothers ♪ 62 00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:42,262 [upbeat musical riff] 63 00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:43,630 [knocking on door] 64 00:02:43,696 --> 00:02:46,899 - Hey, uh, Gretch, can I ask you a favor? 65 00:02:46,966 --> 00:02:48,568 - Make it quick, Franklin. I'm busy. 66 00:02:48,635 --> 00:02:50,436 - [clears throat] Whoa, boy. 67 00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:52,839 I inherited two things from my pappy: 68 00:02:52,905 --> 00:02:56,142 one, keen sense of when a gal's still mad at me, 69 00:02:56,209 --> 00:02:58,511 and the other, alcoholism. 70 00:02:58,578 --> 00:02:59,746 - What do you want, Franklin? 71 00:02:59,812 --> 00:03:02,915 - It's about a beloved structure. 72 00:03:02,982 --> 00:03:04,951 - Did she tell you how to save our masturbation shack? 73 00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,052 - Whoa! 74 00:03:06,119 --> 00:03:08,388 - That better be your belt buckle up my ass. 75 00:03:08,454 --> 00:03:10,189 - Oh, Jesus. 76 00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:11,658 If you go to City Hall, the mayor 77 00:03:11,724 --> 00:03:13,393 can issue an injunction 78 00:03:13,459 --> 00:03:16,029 if the structure has historical significance. 79 00:03:16,095 --> 00:03:17,297 - You want significance? 80 00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:18,631 I'll show you significance! 81 00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:21,734 I once jerked my joystick so many times 82 00:03:21,801 --> 00:03:23,870 I wrote a book of jokes about it! 83 00:03:23,936 --> 00:03:24,937 In fact-- 84 00:03:25,004 --> 00:03:26,239 - [claps] 85 00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:28,808 If you would like to hear Phineas' book of splooze jokes 86 00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:31,477 read by Stellan Skarsgard, please log on 87 00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:35,214 to www.freaksjerkjokes.com. 88 00:03:35,281 --> 00:03:37,617 Now back to our show. [claps] 89 00:03:37,684 --> 00:03:39,786 - It was a number-one bestseller. 90 00:03:39,852 --> 00:03:42,488 - Gretch, sure appreciate you helping us out. 91 00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:44,724 I--I guess this means you may have 92 00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:47,760 buried the proverbial hatchet. 93 00:03:47,827 --> 00:03:48,761 [chuckles] 94 00:03:48,828 --> 00:03:51,030 - That's racist, and we haven't. 95 00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:54,033 - Let's go, fellas. 96 00:03:57,537 --> 00:04:00,406 [funk music] 97 00:04:00,473 --> 00:04:02,375 - I'll meet you guys at the mayor's office. 98 00:04:02,442 --> 00:04:04,777 I--I gots to go peepee. 99 00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:10,783 [urinating] 100 00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:15,955 - [farts] Whoopsie. 101 00:04:18,491 --> 00:04:19,992 [zips] 102 00:04:20,059 --> 00:04:23,429 [grunting] 103 00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:32,372 Hello. - Oh! 104 00:04:32,438 --> 00:04:34,574 What the fuck is going on? 105 00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:35,808 - Not much. 106 00:04:35,875 --> 00:04:37,076 What's going on with you? - Huh. 107 00:04:37,143 --> 00:04:38,344 You look familiar. 108 00:04:38,411 --> 00:04:39,846 Do I know you? 109 00:04:39,912 --> 00:04:42,081 - Ellen DeGeneres, Emmy-winning talk show host 110 00:04:42,148 --> 00:04:43,683 who's adored by millions. 111 00:04:43,750 --> 00:04:46,686 - Then--then why are you here, eyeing my root chute? 112 00:04:46,753 --> 00:04:49,055 - I got myself a little canceled 113 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:52,291 by treating everyone who worked for me like a stinky turd. 114 00:04:52,358 --> 00:04:54,260 - I--I'm in a bit of a rush, ma'am. 115 00:04:54,327 --> 00:04:57,663 But if you're looking for a crap house hookup, uh-- 116 00:04:57,730 --> 00:04:59,132 - Oh, no, no, no, no, no. 117 00:04:59,198 --> 00:05:01,868 When it comes to man-meat, I'm a strict vegetarian, 118 00:05:01,934 --> 00:05:05,104 or pescatarian if you're into fishy vagina jokes. 119 00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:06,773 Anyway, I love show biz, 120 00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:08,508 and I wanna keep a toe in the game, 121 00:05:08,574 --> 00:05:10,910 so now I'm a cock scout. 122 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:13,446 - Now it's starting to get weird. 123 00:05:13,513 --> 00:05:15,148 - I scout dong for the movie industry, 124 00:05:15,214 --> 00:05:17,750 and that third leg of yours is as long 125 00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:20,486 as Rosie O'Donnell's pussy is fat. 126 00:05:20,553 --> 00:05:21,621 Balls against the heel, please. 127 00:05:21,687 --> 00:05:23,389 - Sorry, my bad. 128 00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:24,724 - You're an 11 1/2. 129 00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:26,692 I'm gonna go 12, just to be safe. 130 00:05:26,759 --> 00:05:30,763 - You know, I once performed and filmed erotica. 131 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:34,200 But there is no way I'm jumping back on that bull again. 132 00:05:34,267 --> 00:05:36,469 - This isn't porn. It's a studio picture 133 00:05:36,536 --> 00:05:38,538 starring Timothée Chalamet. 134 00:05:38,604 --> 00:05:40,440 - What the hell does that girly guy 135 00:05:40,506 --> 00:05:42,175 have to do with my johnson? 136 00:05:42,241 --> 00:05:44,510 - Timothée's in town to shoot a superhero movie 137 00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:46,179 with a lot of nudity. 138 00:05:46,245 --> 00:05:48,414 Working title: "Iron Hog." 139 00:05:48,481 --> 00:05:49,816 - Oh. I'd see that. 140 00:05:49,882 --> 00:05:51,818 - Timothée wants to do a full-frontal 141 00:05:51,884 --> 00:05:54,120 'cause he knows that's what wins an Oscar. 142 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:55,555 But his penis-- 143 00:05:55,621 --> 00:05:56,923 - Ugh! 144 00:05:56,989 --> 00:05:58,858 It looks like a piece of beef jerky 145 00:05:58,925 --> 00:06:00,660 been left out in the rain. 146 00:06:00,726 --> 00:06:02,228 - Yeah, it's a mess. 147 00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:04,964 He took 40 tabs of ecstasy and fucked a car wash vacuum. 148 00:06:05,031 --> 00:06:07,900 Anyway, since Chalamet's tool looks like a melted plum, 149 00:06:07,967 --> 00:06:10,203 he needs a cock double. What do you say? 150 00:06:10,269 --> 00:06:12,738 - I say I'm not looking for employment 151 00:06:12,805 --> 00:06:14,474 at the present decade. 152 00:06:14,540 --> 00:06:16,242 - Well, call if you change your mind. 153 00:06:16,309 --> 00:06:18,478 If an assistant answers the phone crying, 154 00:06:18,544 --> 00:06:20,746 you know you got the right number. 155 00:06:20,813 --> 00:06:24,050 [grunting and singing] 156 00:06:30,289 --> 00:06:32,825 ♪ ♪ 157 00:06:34,527 --> 00:06:37,430 [somber music] 158 00:06:37,497 --> 00:06:42,301 ♪ ♪ 159 00:06:42,368 --> 00:06:46,038 - Yo, Freddy, how come we never take Christmas photos, huh? 160 00:06:46,105 --> 00:06:47,173 - Yo, freak dudes. 161 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:49,475 The mayor will see you in a minute. 162 00:06:49,542 --> 00:06:50,943 - Chuck and Charlie? 163 00:06:51,010 --> 00:06:53,246 You guys work for John Mayer? 164 00:06:53,312 --> 00:06:57,450 - We're Mayor Pimko's chiefs of staffs, 165 00:06:57,517 --> 00:07:00,286 our chance to change the world. 166 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,157 - [laughs] Just fucking with you. 167 00:07:05,224 --> 00:07:07,894 We get access to the city's confiscated drug room. 168 00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,862 - We got a stroke shack that needs 169 00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:12,031 a historical landmark sticker. 170 00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:15,134 - Well, only our wise and exalted leader 171 00:07:15,201 --> 00:07:16,235 can hand those out. 172 00:07:17,470 --> 00:07:20,306 [dramatic music playing] 173 00:07:20,373 --> 00:07:22,441 - I am Spider-Man, bitches. 174 00:07:22,508 --> 00:07:23,876 - What the fuck? 175 00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:25,878 I gotta lay off the breakfast shrooms. 176 00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:28,247 - The mayor gave a tax break to the new Chalamet movie, 177 00:07:28,314 --> 00:07:30,650 and in return, the studios offered him 178 00:07:30,716 --> 00:07:32,385 a Spider-Man cameo. 179 00:07:32,451 --> 00:07:33,853 - Very inclusive. 180 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:36,289 - We're gonna roll him off a building. 181 00:07:36,355 --> 00:07:37,990 - Spider-Man, Spider-Man, 182 00:07:38,057 --> 00:07:39,525 does whatever a quadriplegic 183 00:07:39,592 --> 00:07:40,927 with one working finger can. 184 00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:46,732 Call Dr. Goldfarb, you fucking idiots. 185 00:07:46,799 --> 00:07:49,635 - He's the hero we deserve. 186 00:07:49,702 --> 00:07:52,772 - Mr. Mayor, my colleagues and friends' cat 187 00:07:52,838 --> 00:07:54,640 come to you with the urgent matter 188 00:07:54,707 --> 00:07:56,943 of saving a beloved masturbatorium. 189 00:07:57,009 --> 00:07:58,711 - What is in it for me? 190 00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:01,480 - Well, we can offer you a lifetime membership 191 00:08:01,547 --> 00:08:02,882 in the Whack of the Week Club. 192 00:08:02,949 --> 00:08:04,784 - I prefer glory holes. 193 00:08:04,850 --> 00:08:06,018 Give me cash. 194 00:08:06,085 --> 00:08:08,321 - Are you suggesting a bribe? 195 00:08:08,387 --> 00:08:09,922 - Are you wearing a wire? 196 00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:12,325 - No. - Then yes. 197 00:08:12,391 --> 00:08:13,859 - Mr. Mayor, I'm offended. 198 00:08:13,926 --> 00:08:16,062 What you're suggesting is political corruption 199 00:08:16,128 --> 00:08:16,996 at its worst. 200 00:08:17,063 --> 00:08:18,764 - Pay up or fuck off. 201 00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:20,533 [wheelchair beeping] Feeding time. 202 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,635 - Sorry, dudes. You gotta go. 203 00:08:26,005 --> 00:08:28,174 - Today, His Highness will be having 204 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:31,611 steak au poivre, lightly braised bok choy, 205 00:08:31,677 --> 00:08:36,549 and a Beaujolais '92. 206 00:08:36,616 --> 00:08:37,817 - Get it down, Mr. Mayor. 207 00:08:37,883 --> 00:08:39,485 Get it down. 208 00:08:39,552 --> 00:08:41,020 Dudes, if you want your injunction, 209 00:08:41,087 --> 00:08:43,289 you gotta be on, like, Indian burial grounds. 210 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:46,559 - Ooh, or an endangered species has to live there. 211 00:08:46,626 --> 00:08:48,561 - Gentlemen, let's go bury an Injun. 212 00:08:48,628 --> 00:08:49,895 - Or catch a dinosaur. 213 00:08:49,962 --> 00:08:52,798 We have two great options. 214 00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:56,736 - Just wanted to thank you for steering our posse 215 00:08:56,802 --> 00:08:58,404 in the mayor's direction. 216 00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:03,009 Say, could I maybe take you out for an adult beverage? 217 00:09:03,075 --> 00:09:05,144 - I don't think I'm there yet, Franklin. 218 00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,746 - And the superhero movie will be... 219 00:09:06,812 --> 00:09:08,414 - Oh, I wanna hear this. 220 00:09:08,481 --> 00:09:11,450 - And stars Hollywood heartthrob Timothée Chalamet. 221 00:09:11,517 --> 00:09:12,752 - I don't know. 222 00:09:12,818 --> 00:09:14,153 I'm just a regular kid 223 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,355 who wears blazers with no shirt 224 00:09:16,422 --> 00:09:20,059 and spells Timothée with two E's and an accent 225 00:09:20,126 --> 00:09:22,628 over the first E, just like the next guy. 226 00:09:22,695 --> 00:09:23,629 Ha ha. 227 00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:24,797 - Oh, my God. 228 00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:26,232 I love Timothée. 229 00:09:26,298 --> 00:09:28,000 - Oh, that twig boy? I know him. 230 00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:30,836 - Wait you, like, know know him? 231 00:09:30,903 --> 00:09:32,538 He'd be the perfect celebrity 232 00:09:32,605 --> 00:09:34,106 to shine a light on the pink tax. 233 00:09:34,173 --> 00:09:36,108 Women pay more for everyday items 234 00:09:36,175 --> 00:09:38,711 like razor blades and stool softeners. 235 00:09:38,778 --> 00:09:40,312 - Don't forget tampons. 236 00:09:40,379 --> 00:09:43,616 Those gotta be expensive, all the work they do. 237 00:09:43,683 --> 00:09:45,151 - Can you make an introduction? 238 00:09:45,217 --> 00:09:47,553 - Well, I guess there is a long, slightly 239 00:09:47,620 --> 00:09:50,456 curved path to that intro. 240 00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:51,957 - Oh, my God, Franklin. 241 00:09:52,024 --> 00:09:53,659 That'd be amazing. 242 00:09:53,726 --> 00:09:57,897 - I'm honored to be showing more male nudity on screen. 243 00:09:57,963 --> 00:10:01,767 People are gonna be, like, so impressed by what they see. 244 00:10:01,834 --> 00:10:04,537 I'm talking about my dick, fam! 245 00:10:04,603 --> 00:10:06,305 Yeah! 246 00:10:07,206 --> 00:10:10,443 - Saddle up, Frank Jr. We're going back to the show. 247 00:10:15,614 --> 00:10:16,682 - I knew you'd call. 248 00:10:16,749 --> 00:10:18,951 The extra veiny ones always do. 249 00:10:19,018 --> 00:10:20,686 - Say, would it be okay 250 00:10:20,753 --> 00:10:23,422 if I invited a friend to the set? 251 00:10:23,489 --> 00:10:25,024 - Sure, but no one can know 252 00:10:25,091 --> 00:10:26,559 you're Chalamet's dingus double. 253 00:10:26,625 --> 00:10:27,960 You signed an NDA. 254 00:10:28,027 --> 00:10:30,196 Violate it, and you'll be killed. 255 00:10:30,262 --> 00:10:32,798 I mean, you could go to jail, fucker. 256 00:10:32,865 --> 00:10:34,300 Be kind. 257 00:10:34,366 --> 00:10:36,402 - Well, what the hell do I tell people I do? 258 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:37,636 - You don't say anything. 259 00:10:37,703 --> 00:10:39,638 You cram yourself into the bottom of this costume 260 00:10:39,705 --> 00:10:42,942 and stick your King Kong ding dong out of that hole. 261 00:10:43,008 --> 00:10:44,443 - How am I supposed to breathe? 262 00:10:44,510 --> 00:10:47,012 - Through your dick, like the Hemsworth boys. 263 00:10:47,079 --> 00:10:48,914 - Oh, is this him? 264 00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:52,318 The kickstand cowboy! 265 00:10:52,384 --> 00:10:53,486 Bring it in, bruh. 266 00:10:53,552 --> 00:10:55,521 - Hey, your nipples are cold. 267 00:10:55,588 --> 00:10:58,190 - Oh, thank you. I'm honored that you noticed. 268 00:10:58,257 --> 00:10:59,358 I ice them. 269 00:10:59,425 --> 00:11:01,193 Dame Judi Dench gave me that tip. 270 00:11:01,260 --> 00:11:02,061 Oh, man. 271 00:11:02,128 --> 00:11:03,896 Look at me, spilling tea. 272 00:11:03,963 --> 00:11:05,998 I'm such a bitch. 273 00:11:06,065 --> 00:11:07,900 Well, let's see Herman. 274 00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:09,835 - Show Timmy Tim your meat hammer. 275 00:11:09,902 --> 00:11:11,137 - Jeez. 276 00:11:11,203 --> 00:11:13,305 Buy a fella a drink first. 277 00:11:13,372 --> 00:11:16,876 [chuckles] 278 00:11:16,942 --> 00:11:19,145 - My heart is literally racing. 279 00:11:19,211 --> 00:11:20,312 Feel it. 280 00:11:20,379 --> 00:11:23,382 We're gonna win an Oscar together. 281 00:11:23,449 --> 00:11:25,451 - He can stir paint and hit a wiffle ball, 282 00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:27,052 but he don't talk. 283 00:11:29,989 --> 00:11:32,725 - So what's Pachanga mean in English? 284 00:11:32,792 --> 00:11:34,059 "Take whitey's money"? 285 00:11:34,126 --> 00:11:36,462 [laughs] I kid, I kid. 286 00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:38,531 I like you, uh, Todd. 287 00:11:38,597 --> 00:11:39,899 Todd? Wow. 288 00:11:39,965 --> 00:11:41,600 Was not expecting Todd. 289 00:11:42,568 --> 00:11:46,639 - Honey, you did not just hit on a 16 with a deuce showing. 290 00:11:46,705 --> 00:11:48,541 Pssh. 291 00:11:48,607 --> 00:11:51,477 - Sir, your cat can't smoke in here. 292 00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:55,247 - Ah, so you let a cat in, you let me play blackjack, 293 00:11:55,314 --> 00:11:57,249 but I can't smoke a stogie? 294 00:11:57,316 --> 00:11:59,585 That's where you draw the line, Tonto? 295 00:11:59,652 --> 00:12:00,753 - [coughs] 296 00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:02,154 - So, Todd, . 297 00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:03,789 I'm in the market for an elderly Indian 298 00:12:03,856 --> 00:12:05,124 who's about to die. 299 00:12:05,191 --> 00:12:06,792 I need to bury this Indigenous stiff 300 00:12:06,859 --> 00:12:08,727 under my wanking wigwam. 301 00:12:08,794 --> 00:12:10,830 - There's a finder's fee 302 00:12:10,896 --> 00:12:12,464 if you don't mind jewelry that says 303 00:12:12,531 --> 00:12:14,266 "Happy anniversary, Harper" on it. 304 00:12:14,333 --> 00:12:16,035 - Fat man, you're showing a 10. 305 00:12:16,101 --> 00:12:17,870 Hit that bad boy. 306 00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:18,871 - Ugh. 307 00:12:18,938 --> 00:12:20,239 - [grumbles] 308 00:12:20,306 --> 00:12:22,308 - So where are we on that dead Indian? 309 00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:25,044 [all yell] 310 00:12:29,548 --> 00:12:35,754 - Timothée, I have the smallest of favors to ask. 311 00:12:35,821 --> 00:12:37,823 - Favor? What's that? 312 00:12:37,890 --> 00:12:39,458 - My friend Gretchen's visiting, 313 00:12:39,525 --> 00:12:41,927 and she would love to meet you and tell you 314 00:12:41,994 --> 00:12:43,696 about her charity. 315 00:12:43,762 --> 00:12:45,231 - Listen, homey. 316 00:12:45,297 --> 00:12:48,033 I already pledged to a ton of charities. 317 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:49,401 - You mean you donate? 318 00:12:49,468 --> 00:12:51,704 - I pledge. Costs nothing. 319 00:12:51,770 --> 00:12:52,938 [door creaks] 320 00:12:53,005 --> 00:12:54,073 - Oh, she's heading this way now. 321 00:12:54,139 --> 00:12:55,774 - Damn it, kickstand! 322 00:12:55,841 --> 00:12:57,209 You can't be seen with me. 323 00:12:57,276 --> 00:12:59,578 Nobody can know I have a dick double. 324 00:12:59,645 --> 00:13:01,313 Get in the suit. 325 00:13:03,782 --> 00:13:05,117 - Oh, hell. 326 00:13:05,184 --> 00:13:07,419 Them Tarzan briefs don't cover nothing. 327 00:13:07,486 --> 00:13:08,621 Ugh. 328 00:13:08,687 --> 00:13:10,589 - Franklin? 329 00:13:10,656 --> 00:13:11,891 Timothée. 330 00:13:11,957 --> 00:13:14,026 Hi! So cool to meet you. 331 00:13:14,093 --> 00:13:17,029 - Whoa, smoking bod much? Yum. 332 00:13:17,096 --> 00:13:21,066 - So I'm Gretchen Ramos Morris. 333 00:13:21,133 --> 00:13:23,102 My friend Franklin was gonna introduce us, 334 00:13:23,168 --> 00:13:25,004 but I don't know where he is. 335 00:13:25,070 --> 00:13:26,705 - You have great lips. 336 00:13:26,772 --> 00:13:28,240 Can I watch you eat an orange? 337 00:13:31,343 --> 00:13:32,544 Ah! 338 00:13:32,611 --> 00:13:34,947 - Quit saying weird shit and just tell her 339 00:13:35,014 --> 00:13:36,548 you'll do her charity thing. 340 00:13:36,615 --> 00:13:38,784 - While she's eating the orange? 341 00:13:38,851 --> 00:13:40,653 I wanna see her peel it too. 342 00:13:40,719 --> 00:13:42,154 - God dang it. 343 00:13:42,221 --> 00:13:44,957 Just tell her you think the pink tax is an outrage. 344 00:13:45,024 --> 00:13:47,793 - Franklin told me about your pink thing. 345 00:13:47,860 --> 00:13:50,029 I'm totally down to help. - Great! 346 00:13:50,095 --> 00:13:51,897 I'll send you info on our charity event. 347 00:13:51,964 --> 00:13:53,399 - Yes. 348 00:13:53,465 --> 00:13:55,601 - Any idea where Franklin might be? 349 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,002 - No clue. 350 00:13:57,069 --> 00:13:59,371 Well, time to do my part for nudity equity 351 00:13:59,438 --> 00:14:01,473 and go shoot my big scene. 352 00:14:03,776 --> 00:14:05,444 Now! 353 00:14:05,511 --> 00:14:06,679 - Aw. 354 00:14:10,115 --> 00:14:11,383 - Wow. 355 00:14:11,450 --> 00:14:14,787 That--good luck with your big peen. 356 00:14:14,853 --> 00:14:16,021 I mean, scenis. 357 00:14:16,088 --> 00:14:17,456 I mean weenis. 358 00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:20,526 I mean, Jesus Christ, that's a big cock. 359 00:14:25,431 --> 00:14:28,400 - Luckily, the shards of glass that I removed from my scalp 360 00:14:28,467 --> 00:14:30,235 didn't affect my superior brain. 361 00:14:30,302 --> 00:14:31,904 - That's great, Phineas. 362 00:14:31,971 --> 00:14:34,974 - Luckily, the shards of glass that I removed from my scalp 363 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:36,875 didn't affect my superior brain. 364 00:14:36,942 --> 00:14:38,544 - That's great, Phineas. 365 00:14:38,610 --> 00:14:40,145 - Ow. - Yow! 366 00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:41,280 - What was that for? 367 00:14:41,347 --> 00:14:43,115 - 'Cause I don't like you. - Oh. 368 00:14:43,182 --> 00:14:45,050 That one had some stank on it. 369 00:14:45,117 --> 00:14:47,152 - So I will now take this butterfly net, 370 00:14:47,219 --> 00:14:49,521 sneak up on that gigantic endangered tiger, 371 00:14:49,588 --> 00:14:51,590 and bring him back to our shack. 372 00:14:52,591 --> 00:14:53,659 [tiger roaring] 373 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,294 - Dearly beloved, we are gathered here 374 00:14:55,361 --> 00:14:56,228 because that motherfucker is gonna die. 375 00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:58,630 - Oh, no. Phineas can't die! 376 00:14:58,697 --> 00:15:00,733 Then I'll be the ugliest! 377 00:15:00,799 --> 00:15:01,934 - Don't worry. 378 00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:03,168 I brought just the thing 379 00:15:03,235 --> 00:15:04,737 to lure one of these big boys 380 00:15:04,803 --> 00:15:05,938 back to our place. 381 00:15:06,005 --> 00:15:07,506 Rawr. 382 00:15:07,573 --> 00:15:09,141 My ass. 383 00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:11,510 - Oh, a seduction scene. 384 00:15:11,577 --> 00:15:14,179 Good thing I brought my woodwind. 385 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,248 [playing saxophone] 386 00:15:16,315 --> 00:15:17,883 - Freddy, go distract that one. 387 00:15:17,950 --> 00:15:22,421 I'll get this one drooling upstairs and downstairs. 388 00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:28,327 ♪ ♪ 389 00:15:28,394 --> 00:15:30,162 - Hi. I am Freddy. 390 00:15:30,229 --> 00:15:31,897 [growling] 391 00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:34,199 Wanna play tag? You're it. 392 00:15:34,266 --> 00:15:35,968 - Got you! 393 00:15:36,035 --> 00:15:37,302 Ah, fuck! 394 00:15:37,369 --> 00:15:39,071 - Well, he's distracted. 395 00:15:39,138 --> 00:15:40,572 - Ah, fuck! [screaming] 396 00:15:40,639 --> 00:15:42,775 - Oh. 397 00:15:42,841 --> 00:15:46,912 Bring a bucket and a mop for this wet-ass pussy. 398 00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:49,081 - You make sexy body. 399 00:15:49,148 --> 00:15:50,482 - What the fuck did you say? 400 00:15:50,549 --> 00:15:53,919 - You make my wee wee feel funny. 401 00:15:53,986 --> 00:15:55,587 - Oh, that tiger inbred as hell. 402 00:15:55,654 --> 00:15:58,090 Kitty don't do loopy. We out. 403 00:15:58,157 --> 00:16:00,225 - Oh, but I didn't get to the bridge. 404 00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:03,228 [playing saxophone] 405 00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:08,500 - Got to wring this ball sweat outta my Stetson. 406 00:16:08,567 --> 00:16:10,335 - Tex-Mex, back in the suit. 407 00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:12,137 Chop, chop. - Yeah, what for? 408 00:16:12,204 --> 00:16:13,472 We're done shooting for the day. 409 00:16:13,539 --> 00:16:16,341 - I'm meeting that hot "Latinks" for coffee. 410 00:16:16,408 --> 00:16:18,210 I'm gonna try to bone her! 411 00:16:18,277 --> 00:16:19,778 I brought her a nectarine. 412 00:16:19,845 --> 00:16:20,879 - My Gretchen? 413 00:16:20,946 --> 00:16:22,114 The hell you are. 414 00:16:22,181 --> 00:16:24,216 - You've hit that? Awesome! 415 00:16:24,283 --> 00:16:26,452 We're gonna be bang brothers! Uh! 416 00:16:26,518 --> 00:16:28,954 - I'm gonna bang you in the fucking head. 417 00:16:29,021 --> 00:16:31,223 - Oh, you're funny, bruh. 418 00:16:31,290 --> 00:16:33,826 And you're a great wingman. 419 00:16:33,892 --> 00:16:36,195 Keep feeding me shit to say so I can cross 420 00:16:36,261 --> 00:16:38,497 into her southern border. 421 00:16:38,564 --> 00:16:41,200 - You're gonna keep that withered willy in your pants. 422 00:16:41,266 --> 00:16:45,704 If you hand Gretchen one more piece of stone fruit, I quit. 423 00:16:45,771 --> 00:16:47,239 - I don't think so, boo. 424 00:16:47,306 --> 00:16:49,007 You signed an NDA. 425 00:16:49,074 --> 00:16:50,409 You breathe a word to her, 426 00:16:50,476 --> 00:16:53,612 and your ass goes straight to Alcatraz. 427 00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,280 - Oh! 428 00:16:56,882 --> 00:16:58,617 - To raise money for Sink the Pink, 429 00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:00,052 I thought we could auction off 430 00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:01,420 one of the shirts you never wear. 431 00:17:01,487 --> 00:17:03,789 - Oh, your ass is straight fire. 432 00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:07,693 - Oh, that's... direct. Thank you. 433 00:17:07,759 --> 00:17:09,528 - Stop freestyling. 434 00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:13,031 Now, just say "I know sometimes I can come off 435 00:17:13,098 --> 00:17:15,567 "like a bit of a jackass, but I-- 436 00:17:15,634 --> 00:17:18,237 I sure hope you can see past that." 437 00:17:18,303 --> 00:17:20,005 - Like a wandering calf. 438 00:17:20,072 --> 00:17:24,743 When I'm around you, well, it's like I finally found my herd. 439 00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:25,844 [moos] 440 00:17:25,911 --> 00:17:27,446 - Wow. 441 00:17:27,513 --> 00:17:30,716 That's so sweet and kind of unexpected. 442 00:17:31,950 --> 00:17:34,153 - Yeah, well, I like cows and junk. 443 00:17:34,219 --> 00:17:37,156 I like tipping them over. 444 00:17:37,222 --> 00:17:39,525 They're so stupid. Hah! 445 00:17:39,591 --> 00:17:41,493 - [laughs] You're funny, Timothée. 446 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:43,695 I'm really glad I got to meet the real you. 447 00:17:43,762 --> 00:17:45,664 - Oh, my God. 448 00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:47,833 How could this get any worse? 449 00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:49,868 - [farts] 450 00:17:49,935 --> 00:17:52,471 - Oh, don't breathe in. Breathe out. 451 00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:56,608 - No, the Buddha fountain goes here. 452 00:17:56,675 --> 00:17:59,044 - Are you guys still fighting over turning the shed 453 00:17:59,111 --> 00:18:01,046 into a yoga studio or a dojo? 454 00:18:01,113 --> 00:18:02,581 - Fighting? No! 455 00:18:02,648 --> 00:18:05,083 Compromising? Yes. 456 00:18:05,150 --> 00:18:06,451 - Really? 457 00:18:06,518 --> 00:18:08,520 'Cause this looks like it's only a yoga studio. 458 00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:10,789 - Camille, you're making it very hard 459 00:18:10,856 --> 00:18:13,859 for me to lie to myself. 460 00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:16,862 - Thank you so much for making things happen with Timothée. 461 00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:20,599 - Just happy I could help you and your stinky pink. 462 00:18:20,666 --> 00:18:23,702 So how about those aforementioned 463 00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:25,304 adult beverages? 464 00:18:25,370 --> 00:18:27,139 - I need to focus on seating for the event. 465 00:18:27,206 --> 00:18:28,640 Timothée is gonna be my date. 466 00:18:28,707 --> 00:18:30,842 - What? When did we say that? 467 00:18:30,909 --> 00:18:32,678 - T-Chams and I have been texting. 468 00:18:32,744 --> 00:18:35,714 To be honest, he's more charming and funny in person. 469 00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:38,884 - He's not charming and funny anywhere. 470 00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:40,285 Neither are his farts. 471 00:18:40,352 --> 00:18:41,620 - I think he is. 472 00:18:41,687 --> 00:18:43,322 I have a real connection with him. 473 00:18:43,388 --> 00:18:44,623 - It's not with him. 474 00:18:44,690 --> 00:18:47,593 That was with-- ah, I can't say. 475 00:18:47,659 --> 00:18:51,330 I don't wanna end up in Alcatraz. 476 00:18:51,396 --> 00:18:54,333 - Special delivery from Mr. Chalamet 477 00:18:54,399 --> 00:18:58,203 for Ms. Latinks: our deluxe stone fruit basket. 478 00:18:58,270 --> 00:19:00,272 Oh, no, the apricots! 479 00:19:05,544 --> 00:19:07,279 - Franklin, pull up a crate 480 00:19:07,346 --> 00:19:11,183 for some victory mac and cheese. 481 00:19:11,250 --> 00:19:12,417 Freddy, goddamn it. 482 00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:13,352 Of course you forgot the cheese. 483 00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:14,786 - No, I didn't. 484 00:19:14,853 --> 00:19:15,954 It's right here. 485 00:19:16,021 --> 00:19:17,155 - That's the macaroni. 486 00:19:17,222 --> 00:19:18,390 - That's your opinion. 487 00:19:18,457 --> 00:19:20,559 - Oh, what's going on? Who's this? 488 00:19:20,626 --> 00:19:23,161 - Meet Chief Jay Silverbone. 489 00:19:23,228 --> 00:19:25,430 - Once again, I am not a chief. 490 00:19:25,497 --> 00:19:28,133 I am a dental hygienist from Stockton. 491 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:31,637 - Some may see Chief Jay as a degenerate card counter, 492 00:19:31,703 --> 00:19:33,905 but I saw his true potential. 493 00:19:33,972 --> 00:19:36,275 You see, he's here to sell his mother-in-law's remains 494 00:19:36,341 --> 00:19:37,643 for meth money. 495 00:19:37,709 --> 00:19:39,211 - We're gonna bury her under the floorboards 496 00:19:39,278 --> 00:19:40,379 and save our shack. 497 00:19:40,445 --> 00:19:41,747 - See? 498 00:19:41,813 --> 00:19:43,482 Good things do happen to good people. 499 00:19:43,548 --> 00:19:44,916 - Booty call! 500 00:19:44,983 --> 00:19:45,951 - Aw, fuck. 501 00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,786 - What in holy hell? 502 00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,255 - Halfwit here tracked my scent all the way back. 503 00:19:50,322 --> 00:19:51,890 Ain't happening, dopey. 504 00:19:51,957 --> 00:19:53,859 Go eat some paste! 505 00:19:53,925 --> 00:19:55,193 - [growls] 506 00:19:55,260 --> 00:19:57,229 - No, bad mentally challenged tiger! 507 00:19:57,296 --> 00:19:58,430 Stop! 508 00:19:58,497 --> 00:20:01,099 At least leave me a foot! 509 00:20:01,166 --> 00:20:02,634 - [screaming] 510 00:20:08,173 --> 00:20:11,543 - We only have one more week in our beloved shack. 511 00:20:11,610 --> 00:20:14,746 We need to cherish every last minute of it. 512 00:20:14,813 --> 00:20:16,948 - Alone, Freddy. Alone. 513 00:20:17,015 --> 00:20:19,484 - Losing this shack may be the single worst thing 514 00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:20,986 that's ever happened to anyone! 515 00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:23,689 And that includes Chief Jay Tigermeal. 516 00:20:23,755 --> 00:20:25,557 - Ain't that one of the chief's toes right there? 517 00:20:25,624 --> 00:20:26,625 Can't we bury that? 518 00:20:26,692 --> 00:20:29,061 - Oh, Kitty, that's not a toe. 519 00:20:29,127 --> 00:20:30,962 It's a macaroni. 520 00:20:31,029 --> 00:20:32,664 [chewing] 521 00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:34,933 Nope, that's a toe. [gulps] 522 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,636 - On top of that, I gotta spend another day 523 00:20:37,703 --> 00:20:40,572 sweet-talking Gretchen into the hairless arms 524 00:20:40,639 --> 00:20:43,442 of Timothée Chevrolet. 525 00:20:43,508 --> 00:20:45,310 - Why don't--why don't you just tell Gretchen 526 00:20:45,377 --> 00:20:46,445 those were your words? 527 00:20:46,511 --> 00:20:47,446 - I can't. 528 00:20:47,512 --> 00:20:49,414 I signed an NWA. 529 00:20:49,481 --> 00:20:51,783 They could put me in prison for 10 years. 530 00:20:51,850 --> 00:20:56,588 - I'm no lawyer, but that sounds completely right to me. 531 00:20:56,655 --> 00:20:58,357 - Hey, gang. New plan. 532 00:20:58,423 --> 00:21:00,992 The demo happens tomorrow. 533 00:21:01,059 --> 00:21:02,294 - You heard the man. 534 00:21:02,361 --> 00:21:03,395 Whack time! 535 00:21:03,462 --> 00:21:04,763 - Knock it off, chub-tugger. 536 00:21:04,830 --> 00:21:07,966 - So get your crap out of here by tomorrow, 537 00:21:08,033 --> 00:21:09,735 or it's getting torched. 538 00:21:09,801 --> 00:21:13,705 Jesus, God, this place smells like Satan's asshole. 539 00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:15,440 - I know you meant that as a knock, 540 00:21:15,507 --> 00:21:17,142 but "Satan's asshole" happens to be 541 00:21:17,209 --> 00:21:18,944 the name of my favorite porno, 542 00:21:19,010 --> 00:21:23,115 starring our very own Franklin Freak. 543 00:21:23,181 --> 00:21:24,783 - Hey, I catered that bitch. 544 00:21:24,850 --> 00:21:26,818 Also held up the damn boom mic. 545 00:21:26,885 --> 00:21:29,321 - You were in "Satan's Asshole?" 546 00:21:29,388 --> 00:21:31,757 I cited that porn noir in my thesis 547 00:21:31,823 --> 00:21:33,392 on avant-garde filmmaking. 548 00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:34,926 It's a cult classic. 549 00:21:34,993 --> 00:21:38,196 That landmark film is a piece of history. 550 00:21:38,263 --> 00:21:40,465 - All right, let's go before he pulls his dick out again. 551 00:21:40,532 --> 00:21:41,566 - Whoo! 552 00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:43,068 - Wait a minute. That's it! 553 00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:46,004 Franklin, you filmed that scene right in this shack, yes? 554 00:21:46,071 --> 00:21:49,508 - Director Rob Jammer paid us in acid tabs, 555 00:21:49,574 --> 00:21:51,543 if you recall. [chuckles] 556 00:21:51,610 --> 00:21:53,678 - I do not recall getting any LSD. 557 00:21:53,745 --> 00:21:54,746 Where's my cut? 558 00:21:54,813 --> 00:21:57,382 I worked boom for points. 559 00:21:57,449 --> 00:21:59,651 - This timeless cinematic artifact 560 00:21:59,718 --> 00:22:01,453 could save our beat-off barn. 561 00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,188 - To the freakmobile! 562 00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:06,191 - He knows we don't have a car, right? 563 00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:08,560 - Boy's just sitting on a picnic table, 564 00:22:08,627 --> 00:22:10,262 digging in his pocket for keys. 565 00:22:10,328 --> 00:22:12,364 [car honks, tires screech] 566 00:22:12,431 --> 00:22:14,166 What the fuck? 567 00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:20,205 - [moaning] 568 00:22:20,272 --> 00:22:22,774 - This tour de force was filmed in our shack. 569 00:22:22,841 --> 00:22:25,210 That makes it a historic landmark. 570 00:22:25,277 --> 00:22:28,647 And fun fact, this porno marks Linda Lovejuice's 571 00:22:28,713 --> 00:22:30,115 titular performance. 572 00:22:30,182 --> 00:22:31,483 I don't know what that word means, 573 00:22:31,550 --> 00:22:32,818 but she blew a horse. 574 00:22:32,884 --> 00:22:35,420 - Too bad the sound quality was so terrible. 575 00:22:35,487 --> 00:22:37,022 - The fuck you want from me? 576 00:22:37,088 --> 00:22:38,824 I was holding that boom up for hours 577 00:22:38,890 --> 00:22:40,525 because that horse couldn't get wood. 578 00:22:40,592 --> 00:22:42,761 - This is the part where I go out for smokes, 579 00:22:42,828 --> 00:22:44,729 come back to find my girl in bed 580 00:22:44,796 --> 00:22:46,531 with a pizza delivery horse. 581 00:22:46,598 --> 00:22:47,933 So I join in. 582 00:22:47,999 --> 00:22:50,302 [horse neighing] 583 00:22:50,368 --> 00:22:52,370 - I recognize that cock. 584 00:22:52,437 --> 00:22:54,172 - The man or the Clydesdale, sir? 585 00:22:54,239 --> 00:22:56,908 - That's the stunt cock from "Iron Hog." 586 00:22:56,975 --> 00:22:59,578 The mayor gets all the dailies whenever they involve cocks. 587 00:22:59,644 --> 00:23:02,481 - Same cock, same cock, same cock. 588 00:23:02,547 --> 00:23:04,549 - Are you dudes trying to blackmail us? 589 00:23:04,616 --> 00:23:06,184 - Blackmail? What are you talking about? 590 00:23:06,251 --> 00:23:07,919 - You're saying you'll tell the world 591 00:23:07,986 --> 00:23:09,621 that Chalamet uses a cock double, 592 00:23:09,688 --> 00:23:10,922 the movie will shut down, 593 00:23:10,989 --> 00:23:13,058 and the mayor will lose millions in tax revenue? 594 00:23:13,124 --> 00:23:14,259 - And his cameo? 595 00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:16,428 - They're rolling him off a building. 596 00:23:16,495 --> 00:23:18,530 - I am Spider-Man, bitches. 597 00:23:18,597 --> 00:23:20,065 - Stop wasting our time! 598 00:23:20,131 --> 00:23:22,167 I'm showing you equestrian erotica. 599 00:23:22,234 --> 00:23:25,403 - Dumbass, he just told you how to save the shed. 600 00:23:25,470 --> 00:23:27,472 - Kitty, please. Phineas is working. 601 00:23:27,539 --> 00:23:29,274 - You guys have us over a barrel. 602 00:23:29,341 --> 00:23:30,475 - Wait a minute! 603 00:23:30,542 --> 00:23:31,743 Brainstorm. 604 00:23:31,810 --> 00:23:33,945 Give us what we want, or we blab. 605 00:23:34,012 --> 00:23:36,014 - We already said we're doing that. 606 00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:37,182 - Checkmate! 607 00:23:37,249 --> 00:23:39,351 - You just got Phineas-ed, fuckers. 608 00:23:39,417 --> 00:23:43,755 ♪ ♪ 609 00:23:43,822 --> 00:23:48,159 - To 60 more beautiful years of shack-jacking. 610 00:23:48,226 --> 00:23:50,095 all: Shack-jacking! 611 00:23:50,161 --> 00:23:52,364 - Come on, Franklin. We're celebrating. 612 00:23:52,430 --> 00:23:56,401 - What in God's name do I have to celebrate? 613 00:23:56,468 --> 00:24:00,071 [photos snapping] 614 00:24:01,172 --> 00:24:02,407 - Poor Franklin. 615 00:24:02,474 --> 00:24:05,911 First the pizza delivery horse, now this shirtless jerk. 616 00:24:05,977 --> 00:24:07,712 Women. 617 00:24:07,779 --> 00:24:10,048 - Thank you, thank you. Spread love. 618 00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:12,584 - It's nice to see Gretchen so happy. 619 00:24:12,651 --> 00:24:14,119 She deserves it. 620 00:24:14,185 --> 00:24:16,588 That skinny boy getting his dick sucked tonight. 621 00:24:16,655 --> 00:24:18,957 - Miss Ramos Morris, what do you think about the courage 622 00:24:19,024 --> 00:24:20,926 Mr. Chalamet has displayed by baring 623 00:24:20,992 --> 00:24:22,961 so much of himself onscreen? 624 00:24:23,028 --> 00:24:25,297 - I think that Timothée's insistence on bringing 625 00:24:25,363 --> 00:24:28,033 full frontal ample male nudity to cinema 626 00:24:28,099 --> 00:24:30,635 is gonna help women pay less for laxatives. 627 00:24:30,702 --> 00:24:34,372 - Word. I'm packing heat, son! 628 00:24:34,439 --> 00:24:37,242 Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho! 629 00:24:37,309 --> 00:24:39,277 [photos snapping] 630 00:24:39,344 --> 00:24:42,414 [tense music] 631 00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:44,182 - Pecker fraud! 632 00:24:46,384 --> 00:24:48,486 - [screams] - [gasps] 633 00:24:48,553 --> 00:24:49,554 - [vomiting] 634 00:24:49,621 --> 00:24:51,590 - What is that? 635 00:24:51,656 --> 00:24:54,259 - [laughs] 636 00:24:54,326 --> 00:24:55,727 - Oh, ain't nobody putting their mouth on that. 637 00:24:55,794 --> 00:24:57,796 - [screams] 638 00:24:57,862 --> 00:25:00,231 [photos snapping] 639 00:25:01,566 --> 00:25:03,068 - Yeah. 640 00:25:03,134 --> 00:25:05,570 Now that we got old raisin dick out of our lives, 641 00:25:05,637 --> 00:25:06,905 how about that drink? 642 00:25:06,972 --> 00:25:09,107 - Franklin, you lied to me. 643 00:25:09,174 --> 00:25:10,375 - What? 644 00:25:10,442 --> 00:25:12,844 Just because I was pretending to be another man's dick 645 00:25:12,911 --> 00:25:15,413 and making you think my words were his? 646 00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:16,648 - Yeah, that. 647 00:25:16,715 --> 00:25:18,316 - You--you call that lying? 648 00:25:18,383 --> 00:25:20,218 I call that courting. 649 00:25:20,285 --> 00:25:22,654 You gotta admit, we did have a moment there. 650 00:25:22,721 --> 00:25:24,522 - You're right, Franklin. We did connect. 651 00:25:24,589 --> 00:25:27,993 And you are one of the big ones--the good ones. 652 00:25:28,059 --> 00:25:30,829 But I think the best version of us is friends. 653 00:25:30,895 --> 00:25:33,331 - Ah--all right, friends it is. 654 00:25:33,398 --> 00:25:35,300 But that don't mean I'm giving up. 655 00:25:35,367 --> 00:25:38,603 I mean, I'll be like an old crow sitting on a wire, 656 00:25:38,670 --> 00:25:41,272 waiting to swoop down on the carcass 657 00:25:41,339 --> 00:25:43,141 of a run-over possum. 658 00:25:43,208 --> 00:25:45,777 I don't know if that's the best analogy. 659 00:25:45,844 --> 00:25:47,545 Anyway, all right. 660 00:25:47,612 --> 00:25:48,913 Friends--friends it is. 661 00:25:48,980 --> 00:25:50,649 - That's sweet, Franklin. 662 00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:52,684 - No, don't do it! - Huh? 663 00:25:54,219 --> 00:25:56,655 - I tried to save you, shacky. 664 00:25:56,721 --> 00:25:58,556 I had a beautiful plan in place, 665 00:25:58,623 --> 00:26:00,358 but Franklin fucked it up. 666 00:26:00,425 --> 00:26:01,993 Say your goodbyes, Freddy! 667 00:26:04,095 --> 00:26:06,998 - That motherfucker Krazy-glued himself to the shack. 668 00:26:07,065 --> 00:26:09,267 At least, I hope it's Krazy Glue 669 00:26:09,334 --> 00:26:11,703 and not Krazy goo. 670 00:26:11,770 --> 00:26:14,572 Share your favorite come puns with us 671 00:26:14,639 --> 00:26:17,909 at www.freaksjerkjokes.com. 672 00:26:17,976 --> 00:26:19,377 - Now I get it. 673 00:26:19,444 --> 00:26:21,680 You need mac and cheese. 674 00:26:21,746 --> 00:26:23,982 I always thought it was mac or cheese. 675 00:26:24,049 --> 00:26:25,550 They need to put that on the box. 676 00:26:25,617 --> 00:26:28,353 - Come on, Freddy. Let's try to peel him off. 677 00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:30,021 - [groaning] 678 00:26:31,122 --> 00:26:33,158 - Okay, I think we scared them enough. 679 00:26:33,224 --> 00:26:34,826 The building inspector said there's 680 00:26:34,893 --> 00:26:36,895 so much toxic DNA, 681 00:26:36,961 --> 00:26:38,897 it would cost millions to make it habitable. 682 00:26:38,963 --> 00:26:40,799 - So the shack is yours, gentlemen. 683 00:26:40,865 --> 00:26:41,866 Whack away. 684 00:26:41,933 --> 00:26:43,868 - The good guys win again! 685 00:26:43,935 --> 00:26:45,737 - Don't ever let anyone tell you 686 00:26:45,804 --> 00:26:47,639 hard work doesn't pay off. 687 00:26:47,706 --> 00:26:49,908 [rocket whooshes] [yells] 688 00:26:50,909 --> 00:26:53,111 - Nobody blackmails me. 689 00:26:53,178 --> 00:26:55,780 You just got Pimko'd, bitches. 690 00:26:55,847 --> 00:26:57,649 [upbeat music] 691 00:26:57,716 --> 00:26:59,984 - ♪ P-I-M to the K-O ♪ 692 00:27:00,051 --> 00:27:01,586 ♪ Bob got that mad robot flow ♪ 693 00:27:01,653 --> 00:27:03,621 ♪ He need to spin to use his little crumpled dick ♪ 694 00:27:03,688 --> 00:27:06,024 ♪ So, baby, you want some, bring a Popsicle stick ♪ 695 00:27:06,091 --> 00:27:08,560 ♪ Baby got back, Pimko got chair ♪ 696 00:27:08,626 --> 00:27:10,495 ♪ He's running shit, mess with him if you dare ♪ 697 00:27:10,562 --> 00:27:12,530 ♪ Bitches love Pimko he ain't no wuss ♪ 698 00:27:12,597 --> 00:27:13,932 ♪ Because he building access ramps ♪ 699 00:27:13,998 --> 00:27:15,567 ♪ Straight up in they pussy ♪ 700 00:27:15,633 --> 00:27:17,736 ♪ I'm the mayor, bitch ♪ 701 00:27:17,802 --> 00:27:19,904 ♪ I'm the mayor, bitch ♪ 702 00:27:19,971 --> 00:27:21,539 ♪ Snitches get stitches ♪ 703 00:27:21,606 --> 00:27:23,875 ♪ ♪ 704 00:27:23,942 --> 00:27:26,244 ♪ P-I-M to the K-O ♪ 705 00:27:26,311 --> 00:27:27,812 ♪ Big P-I-M-P for sho ♪ 706 00:27:27,879 --> 00:27:29,881 ♪ He's the mayor, the boss, the head honcho ♪ 707 00:27:29,948 --> 00:27:32,183 ♪ Grease up the wheels because it's time to roll ♪ 708 00:27:32,250 --> 00:27:34,753 ♪ I got swagger to pimp because I'm P to the imko ♪ 709 00:27:34,819 --> 00:27:37,155 ♪ Got to give the disabled rights and I'm here to show ♪ 710 00:27:37,222 --> 00:27:39,390 ♪ You can run shit from a chair, I got flow ♪ 711 00:27:39,457 --> 00:27:41,693 ♪ That's right 'cause I'm P to the imko ♪ 712 00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:43,495 ♪ I'm the mayor, bitch ♪ 713 00:27:43,561 --> 00:27:44,996 ♪ I'm the mayor, bitch ♪ 714 00:27:45,046 --> 00:27:49,596 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 49604

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