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1
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(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
2
00:00:01,876 --> 00:00:03,461
NARRATOR: 1965.
3
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High school sports
were all the rage.
4
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-(CROWD CHEERING)
-NARRATOR: Football. Basketball.
5
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Baseball.
6
00:00:08,633 --> 00:00:10,635
And the most popular sport
of all,
7
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snorkeling.
8
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-(WHISTLE BLOWS)
-NARRATOR: As thousands of high school athletes
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00:00:16,933 --> 00:00:18,560
dove into the pool to compete,
10
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-there was one shining star...
-(EAGLE SCREECHING)
11
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...who outshone them all.
12
00:00:22,063 --> 00:00:24,733
Young Cinnamon J. Scudworth.
13
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As everyone knows
in the extremely popular sport
14
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of competitive snorkeling,
players have to spot fish.
15
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No one could spot more fish
than Scudworth.
16
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-And the world
was starting to notice. -(CROWD CHEERING)
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(KISSES)
18
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FISH GIRL: (GASPS)
He pointed at me! (SQUEALS)
19
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-(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-Yeah, I remember,
20
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Scudworth took this rinky dink
little school all the way
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-to the National
Snorkeling Invitational... -(CROWD CHEERING)
22
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...in Big City, USA.
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00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:54,220
-I invested a fortune...
-(CROWD CHEERING)
24
00:00:54,304 --> 00:00:56,389
...in that big-nippled
son of a bitch.
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00:00:56,473 --> 00:00:59,309
NARRATOR: But alas,
as with all rising stars,
26
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-eventually they must fall.
-(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
27
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Scudworth, the National
Snorkeling Invitational
28
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-starts in 20 minutes!
-(YOUNG PRINCIPAL SCUDWORTH MUNCHING)
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You need a full 30
before you go swimming!
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Don’t you get it?
I don’t care! I feel invincible!
31
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NARRATOR:
But he was very vincible.
32
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My tummy! It hurts so much!
Owie!
33
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NARRATOR: He was diagnosed
with type-1 tummy cramps.
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A devastating blow
to his future...
35
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-(GURGLING SCREAM)
-...and his bowels.
36
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-After that, people weren’t
pointing with him anymore... -(CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING)
37
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-...they were pointing at him.
-(LAUGHTER)
38
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(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
39
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I was done with Scudworth.
I mean, imagine a snorkeler
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getting pointed at
like some fish.
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I can’t think of anything worse.
42
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Except maybe if you were
a high jumper
43
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and people started jumping
over you.
44
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NARRATOR: On the cusp
of fame and fortune,
45
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Scudworth lost it all.
46
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He retreated from the spotlight
47
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-never to be seen again.
-(FLIES BUZZ)
48
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(CAN POPS OPEN)
49
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(INHALES, GULPS)
50
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CHEERLEADERS:
Sports! Sports! Sports! Sports!
51
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SACAGAWEA: And another
disappointing effort...
52
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(CROWD BOOS)
53
00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:05,125
...by the Clone High
snorkeling team.
54
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-(CROWD BOOING)
-(BUZZER BLARES)
55
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It’s the biggest loss
of the season,
56
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but the team has still launched
57
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into their famous
post-game celebration.
58
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(CHANTING) We tried!
59
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-Yeah, yeah, we tried!
-What’d we do?
60
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(CHANTING) Yeah, we tried!
Yeah, yeah, we tri--
61
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Ah! I missed.
62
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(CHANTING) But you tried!
Yeah, yeah, you tried.
63
00:02:21,766 --> 00:02:25,437
(MARCHING BAND RENDITION
OF "CLONE HIGH THEME SONG" PLAYING) ♪
64
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(SONG CONCLUDES) ♪
65
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(MELANCHOLIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
66
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-(GULPS)
-(GLASS SHATTERING)
67
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Hmm?
68
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,367
Wistful sigh.
69
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:27,665
How did I fall so far, Mr. B?
70
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I was the face of the biggest
snorkeling company in the world.
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Now, I’m trapped
in this godforsaken town,
72
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coaching nothing but losers!
73
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Maybe it’s time to stop thinking
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about snorkeling so much?
You know, you’re also
75
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-a pretty successful sci--
-SCUDWORTH: Balderdash!
76
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I need a protégé.
Someone I can take to the top.
77
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Someone who can help me
recapture the glory I felt
78
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before I ruined everything!
79
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(SCREAMS IN PAIN)
80
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(SQUEALS)
81
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Hey, P. Scud.
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Ooh, you’ve got a bunch of glass
stuck in you.
83
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Sixteen pieces in your left leg,
18 in the right leg,
84
00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:06,538
nine in your right arm,
six in your left arm,
85
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and 14 in your face.
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(INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC
PLAYING) ♪
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Frida Kahlo, you just pointed
and counted all that
88
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with the effortless skill
of a snorkeling champion.
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00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:20,135
A snorkeling what now?
90
00:04:20,218 --> 00:04:23,888
How do you feel about the smell
and taste of chlorine?
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00:04:23,930 --> 00:04:25,390
Love it, obviously.
92
00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:27,684
You have to join
my snorkeling team.
93
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-You have such a natural talent.
-Eh.
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00:04:29,728 --> 00:04:32,480
I’m more into right-brained,
left-wing shiz, like, painting!
95
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I’m submitting a piece
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to the Exclamation
Fine Arts Festival,
97
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and the first prize
is a full ride
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00:04:36,901 --> 00:04:38,570
to the Exclamation Art College.
99
00:04:38,653 --> 00:04:41,406
Oh, Frida, the dream
is to get out of this podunk,
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00:04:41,489 --> 00:04:43,408
backwards, one-horse,
dead-end shithole.
101
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Every one of these losers
would give their middle nut
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to get outta here.
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-Please take my middle nut!
-Take me!
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I mean, it’s a good art school.
Plus, Cleo’s here.
105
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She’s pretty much my muse.
106
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(EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
107
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(MUSIC INTENSIFIES, FADES) ♪
108
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Here you go, boo.
This one’s finished.
109
00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:04,596
Oh, cool!
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Our heads on a platter.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
111
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-'Cause we a feast, babe!
-So, good. (CHUCKLES)
112
00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:14,105
Listen, Frida,
snorkeling can make you rich!
113
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So, instead of giving
Cleo paintings,
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you can buy her things
she’ll actually enjoy,
115
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like catamarans
and Gila monsters.
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Every girl wants a Gila monster
these days.
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(GRUNTS, BREATHES DEEPLY)
Safe and sound.
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Yeah. You really think
I could make it big
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as a swimmer with a pipe?
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00:05:37,128 --> 00:05:41,299
It’s called snorkeling, and yes,
you could. With me by your side.
121
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Okay. Let me submit this
to the festival,
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then I’ll give it a try.
Later, Principal Scudworth!
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Frida. Call me
Coach Scuddy Buddy.
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(CHUCKLES) Nah. Bye!
125
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-(BAND MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-Steady! A little higher!
126
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You got it, Marie?
127
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(GRUNTS, GROANS)
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You’re the base,
Marie Antoinette.
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The most important position
on the mat!
130
00:06:02,278 --> 00:06:03,697
So, we need you
to hold it together.
131
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:06,491
(GROANS) I am try...
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00:06:06,574 --> 00:06:08,076
(GRUNTS)
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-(BONES POPPING)
-(SCREAMS)
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(CHEERLEADERS SCREAM)
135
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(GASPS) Her head
is completely off!
136
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:18,294
Get the school nurse over here.
I think she needs a Tylenol.
137
00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:21,172
On the plus side,
at least she lost a few pounds.
138
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:22,257
We need a new base
139
00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:24,342
for the reverse
pyramid stunt, stat!
140
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:26,636
No one else is strong enough,
Harriet!
141
00:06:26,678 --> 00:06:29,347
Well, we need to find someone!
The reverse pyramid
142
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is the whole reason
I’m getting scouted
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00:06:31,182 --> 00:06:33,018
by Big City College University.
144
00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:35,270
They’ve got the best
film program in the country,
145
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and a cheer scholarship
is my only way in.
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-Good luck!
-(OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
147
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,696
Looks like Harriet’s in trouble
without Marie Antoinette.
148
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When popular kids suffer,
Bleacher Creatures rejoice!
149
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-BLEACHER CREATURES: Huzzah!
-Yes.
150
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-(QUIETLY) Uh, huzzah.
-Oh! Evil idea alert.
151
00:06:53,204 --> 00:06:56,332
Let’s sabotage the cheerleaders
from the inside.
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00:06:56,374 --> 00:07:01,046
-You mean wear their skins?
-No, Ivan the Terrible.
153
00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:04,507
Joan can join the squad
and take 'em down from within.
154
00:07:04,549 --> 00:07:06,968
And trigger
another Cheermageddon!
155
00:07:07,052 --> 00:07:08,219
What’s Cheermageddon?
156
00:07:08,303 --> 00:07:10,513
-(DOO WOP MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-Some years ago Gertrude Stein
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00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:12,599
had a cheer scholarship
to Oxford
158
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until she went
to hold up the Y in "Yell"
159
00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:16,353
and it was upside down.
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00:07:16,394 --> 00:07:18,521
(OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
161
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(CROWD GASPS)
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00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,900
TOPHER BUS: The cheerleaders
appeared to be saying,
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“Hell together.”
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-Huh? (GRUNTS)
-TOPHER: Everyone was so confused
165
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-that the sports team lost
the sports game. -Hot dogs!
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(BOTH SCREAMS)
167
00:07:30,408 --> 00:07:31,701
(CROWD SCREAMS)
168
00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:33,244
TOPHER: As the holder
of the inverted Y,
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00:07:33,328 --> 00:07:34,621
Gertrude ended up losing
170
00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:37,165
her full-ride cheerleading
scholarship to Oxford
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-to cheer for the queen.
-(CROWD BOOING)
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Okay, wait, I don’t really
wanna ruin Harriet’s life.
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She was my best friend.
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Until she kicked you
to the curb.
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The same curb to which
we’ve all been kicked.
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Bleacher Creatures don’t get
offered scholarships
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to fancy schools.
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You think any of us are ever
gonna get outta this town?
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We can’t even get out
of these bleachers.
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00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,435
But I don’t know
if I wanna hurt her
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just because she’s upset.
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HARRIET TUBMAN:
Don’t Joan this up, squad!
183
00:08:00,271 --> 00:08:01,439
-Yes, that's right.
-Huh?
184
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,774
Joan’s a verb now.
185
00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:05,527
It means "screwing everything up
for everyone else."
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00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:09,614
Oh my God! It's already
in the Urban Dictionary.
187
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All right, I’ll take her down.
188
00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:14,953
(SINISTER LAUGHTER)
189
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:17,789
-(CHEWS NERVOUSLY)
-(CROWD CHEERING)
190
00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:19,916
(SCUDWORTH GULPING)
191
00:08:19,957 --> 00:08:21,543
Hey, P. Scud.
Any words of wisdom
192
00:08:21,626 --> 00:08:23,211
-for my first match?
-(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
193
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:24,379
All right, rookie.
194
00:08:24,462 --> 00:08:26,089
I'm going to give you
the same advice
195
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:29,300
the great Schneider Snorkelle
once gave me.
196
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:32,971
Go out there and point at fish.
197
00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:34,347
Got it.
198
00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:36,975
-(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-(BLOWS WHISTLES)
199
00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:38,727
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(SCREAMS)
200
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,855
-(WATER SPLASHING)
-(DING)
201
00:08:42,772 --> 00:08:43,898
(DING)
202
00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:45,817
(CONTINUOUS DINGING)
203
00:08:46,484 --> 00:08:47,527
(DING)
204
00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:48,820
Yes!
205
00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:50,822
(DOLPHIN SQUEAKING)
206
00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:51,990
(SCOREBOARD DINGING)
207
00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:54,617
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CONTINUOUS DINGING)
208
00:08:54,659 --> 00:08:56,953
(CROWD CHEERING)
209
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:57,996
(DINGING)
210
00:08:58,079 --> 00:08:59,164
(TIMER CLICKS)
211
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:00,498
(DING)
212
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,042
-(SCOREBOARD DINGS)
-(BUZZER BLARES)
213
00:09:02,125 --> 00:09:03,960
(CROWD CHEERS)
214
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,337
I never thought I’d say this,
215
00:09:05,420 --> 00:09:08,256
but Clone High wins
the snorkeling match!
216
00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:11,301
(SHOUTING) Goal-d-fish!
217
00:09:11,343 --> 00:09:12,594
We actually won.
218
00:09:12,677 --> 00:09:14,846
-You did it, Frida!
-Thanks, Coach.
219
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,015
(CHANTING) We tried!
Yeah, yeah we tried!
220
00:09:17,098 --> 00:09:19,184
No, you morons, you won!
221
00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:21,269
It doesn’t mean
we didn’t try, Coach!
222
00:09:21,353 --> 00:09:23,355
(CHANTING) We tried!
Yeah, yeah, we tried!
223
00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:24,856
And were successful!
224
00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:27,108
(MARCHING BAND MUSIC
PLAYING) ♪
225
00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:30,362
(CHEWS)
226
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,697
Okay, Genghis,
your job is just to stand here
227
00:09:32,781 --> 00:09:35,116
and hold everyone up.
Do you think you can do that?
228
00:09:35,450 --> 00:09:36,576
Yes!
229
00:09:36,659 --> 00:09:38,912
-Okay, squad, reverse pyramid!
-(MARIE ANTOINETTE SCREAMS)
230
00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:42,332
That’s it, Genghis!
231
00:09:42,374 --> 00:09:44,709
Pyramid, let’s see
those arms up straight!
232
00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:47,087
-(CHEERLEADERS SCREAM)
-No, not you, Genghis!
233
00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:48,713
(CHEERLEADERS GASP)
234
00:09:48,797 --> 00:09:50,715
Whoa! Got it!
235
00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:51,925
-Whoa.
-Joan?
236
00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:53,176
What is she doing here?
237
00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:54,928
Whoa! She just caught
all five of them.
238
00:09:55,011 --> 00:09:57,681
-Uh, actually there were nine.
-(CHEERLEADER SCREAMS, GROANS)
239
00:09:57,722 --> 00:09:59,099
What’s all this about?
240
00:09:59,182 --> 00:10:01,059
You said you think
cheerleading is for stupid
241
00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:02,352
-shouting whores.
-(MARIE SCREAMS)
242
00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:04,020
Ah, used to.
243
00:10:04,062 --> 00:10:07,190
But now, I think
it’s for smart shouting whores.
244
00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:08,692
-(CHEERLEADER SCREAMS)
-(THUD)
245
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:11,945
As much as it pains me
after you betrayed me,
246
00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:13,988
I need you on my squad.
247
00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:17,909
But you’re not in my squad.
Got it, Betray Zellweger?
248
00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:19,536
Got it.
249
00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:23,373
(CHEERLEADERS SCREAM, GROAN)
250
00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:25,709
For Frid’s a jolly
Good Kahlo! ♪
251
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,961
For Frid’s a jolly
Good Kahlo! ♪
252
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:29,587
-(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
-Excuse me.
253
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,423
-Uh, is this where I can find...
-(GASPS)
254
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:32,674
...Frida Kahlo?
255
00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:33,967
-(CHEERLEADER SCREAMS)
-Oh, my God!
256
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:35,385
-(BOTTLE SHATTERING)
-Schneider Snorkelle!
257
00:10:35,427 --> 00:10:38,513
-Scudworth, is that you?
-Yes, sir.
258
00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:40,640
My God, you look like shit.
259
00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:42,183
But hell,
I thought you were dead,
260
00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:44,436
so I-- I guess congratulations.
261
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,771
Frida, this is the most
influential man
262
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:48,189
in the world of snorkeling.
263
00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:49,941
Listen to every word
he has to say.
264
00:10:50,025 --> 00:10:51,860
I wish I did
when I had the chance.
265
00:10:51,943 --> 00:10:54,779
(CLEARS THROAT) I like
what I saw out there today, kid.
266
00:10:54,863 --> 00:10:56,448
I wanna make you part
267
00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:59,284
of the Schneider
Snorkeling family.
268
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:03,955
How does 5,000 schmackers sound
as a signing bonus?
269
00:11:04,039 --> 00:11:05,457
-Whoa!
-That’s a lot of money
270
00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:06,958
-for most people, not me.
-(WHISTLES)
271
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:10,086
And you. I like
the redemption angle here.
272
00:11:10,128 --> 00:11:11,629
If you can get this team to make
273
00:11:11,713 --> 00:11:13,965
the National
Snorkeling Invitational,
274
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:16,301
I’ll give you a spot
on our coaching staff
275
00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:18,470
-at the new facility.
-(UPLIFTING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
276
00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,847
The Schnorkelplex.
Big City, USA.
277
00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:22,932
Just don’t Joan it up this time.
278
00:11:22,974 --> 00:11:25,226
I won’t let you down again,
Mister Snorkelle!
279
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:26,394
-All right, then.
-(SCREAMS)
280
00:11:26,478 --> 00:11:27,854
-I’m off to look at more kids...
-(GROANS)
281
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:29,397
-...in swimsuits.
-(JFK GROANING)
282
00:11:29,481 --> 00:11:32,233
Uh, for scouting purposes,
of course.
283
00:11:32,317 --> 00:11:33,318
-(TOWEL WHIPPING)
-(JFK SCREAMING)
284
00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:35,570
-(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-Okay, squad!
285
00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:37,280
Now, that our snorkeling team
is good,
286
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:38,615
we’ve got a better shot
at making it
287
00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:39,991
out of this disgusting town.
288
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:43,161
We need to play
to our big strength, spelling.
289
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:47,248
No, Betsy Ross! No!
That’s wrong.
290
00:11:47,332 --> 00:11:49,668
Listen, squad.
We have to get this right.
291
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,003
We can’t have
another Cheermageddon!
292
00:11:52,087 --> 00:11:55,173
So, Cheermageddon’s
pretty bad, huh?
293
00:11:55,256 --> 00:11:57,592
It’s only, like,
my biggest fear in the world
294
00:11:57,676 --> 00:12:00,845
other than jack-in-the-boxes.
The toy and the restaurant.
295
00:12:00,887 --> 00:12:02,514
Everyone expects me
to get recruited
296
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:06,142
by Big City College University
and if I don’t get in...
297
00:12:06,184 --> 00:12:08,019
Hey, why am I telling you
any of this?
298
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:10,105
We’re not friends anymore.
(SCOFFS)
299
00:12:10,188 --> 00:12:14,526
I know, we’re just cheerleaders
on the same team.
300
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:15,735
Exactly. You know,
301
00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:17,696
this isn’t easy for me to say,
obviously,
302
00:12:17,779 --> 00:12:20,031
but, um, you were okay
out there today. (SIGHS)
303
00:12:20,115 --> 00:12:21,908
-I was?
-Let’s just say you weren’t
304
00:12:21,991 --> 00:12:24,202
a total flaming garbage dump
and leave it at that.
305
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:26,788
-Professional compliment over!
-(GASPS)
306
00:12:28,957 --> 00:12:30,375
TOPHER: Psst! Nice work.
307
00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:32,002
Making them think
you’re actually enjoying
308
00:12:32,043 --> 00:12:34,170
doing those dumb cheers
with those stupid idiots.
309
00:12:34,212 --> 00:12:37,298
Yeah. It really seemed like
I was having fun hanging out
310
00:12:37,382 --> 00:12:38,925
with my old pal, right?
311
00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:40,719
TOPHER: Now,
that Harriet trusts you,
312
00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:43,054
we can put our super complicated
plan in place.
313
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:44,931
IVAN THE TERRIBLE:
When they spell out “Clone High,”
314
00:12:45,015 --> 00:12:48,309
you’ll switch out the letters
so it spells out, “Bone High.”
315
00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,395
TOPHER: (CHUCKLES)
Isn’t that so funny?
316
00:12:50,478 --> 00:12:51,688
"Bone" instead of "clone."
317
00:12:51,730 --> 00:12:52,939
It’s like, wha... (CHUCKLES)
318
00:12:53,023 --> 00:12:54,899
It’s gonna be
a full on Cheermageddon!
319
00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:58,445
-(BLEACHER CREATURES LAUGH)
-Yeah. (FAKE LAUGHS) Right.
320
00:12:58,528 --> 00:13:00,238
-(CROWD CHEERS)
-SACAGAWEA: Well, snorkel fans,
321
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,032
Clone High’s
hot streak continues.
322
00:13:02,073 --> 00:13:05,243
If they keep this up, we could
be heading for Big City, USA.
323
00:13:06,202 --> 00:13:07,787
Throw me an energy bar, Coach.
324
00:13:07,871 --> 00:13:09,122
Not a chance in hell.
325
00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:11,374
We’ve got another match
in 15 minutes.
326
00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:14,419
Eating now could end
your entire snorkeling career.
327
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:17,088
-Why do you say that?
-Don’t you get it?
328
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,090
-(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-Cramps!
329
00:13:19,174 --> 00:13:20,091
Yikes.
330
00:13:20,175 --> 00:13:21,593
If we’re going to make
nationals,
331
00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:23,428
you still got a lot to learn.
332
00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,638
And I’ve got a lot to teach.
333
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:28,433
(CHOMPS)
Oh, God. Yuck. Goddamn it.
334
00:13:28,516 --> 00:13:30,727
(GAGS) I did you a favor.
335
00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:34,272
-(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-(FRIDA PANTS, GRUNTS)
336
00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:37,275
(GUNSHOT)
337
00:13:43,615 --> 00:13:44,616
(GUNSHOT)
338
00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:45,658
(BLOWS)
339
00:13:47,118 --> 00:13:48,870
(LAUGHS)
340
00:13:57,087 --> 00:13:58,463
(KISSES)
341
00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,465
(LAUGHS) Whoo!
342
00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:03,051
-(GRUNTS)
-Yes!
343
00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:05,470
Yes!
344
00:14:09,099 --> 00:14:10,600
(SURFER ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
345
00:14:10,642 --> 00:14:15,146
GROUP: (CHANTING) Frida! Frida!
Frida! Frida! Frida!
346
00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:17,023
Free pinto bean budinos
for the winners.
347
00:14:17,107 --> 00:14:18,149
GROUP: Whoo!
348
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:19,192
Listen up.
349
00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:21,444
If we win next Friday,
we’ll earn a spot
350
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:25,156
in the National Snorkeling
Invitational in Big City, USA,
351
00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:27,826
and I can finally leave
this town for good.
352
00:14:27,909 --> 00:14:29,452
Frida, keep up the good work.
353
00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:31,329
The rest of you,
don’t Joan this out.
354
00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:35,375
-Uh, it’s “Joan this up.”
-Never correct me! (GRUMBLES)
355
00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:38,294
Wait, I thought you were going
to that art expo next Friday?
356
00:14:38,336 --> 00:14:41,172
You know, I never heard back
about the stuff I submitted.
357
00:14:41,256 --> 00:14:42,382
But it doesn’t matter.
358
00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:45,427
I need that snorkeling money
so I can buy you pricy things.
359
00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:46,845
Which reminds me,
how do you like this
360
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,179
dining room set by Broyhill?
361
00:14:48,263 --> 00:14:50,056
-(APPLAUSE)
-(CROWD GASPING)
362
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,350
Oh, my God, yes! Give it to me.
363
00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,269
(CHUCKLES) A lot better
than those worthless paintings
364
00:14:54,352 --> 00:14:55,645
I used to give you, huh?
365
00:14:55,687 --> 00:14:59,858
I mean, I wanna say no,
but, like, I physically can’t.
366
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,484
(LAUGHS)
You know what I’m saying?
367
00:15:01,526 --> 00:15:03,236
(CHUCKLES) Yeah.
368
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:06,156
(SIGHS) Listen, Frida.
369
00:15:06,197 --> 00:15:09,034
You need to do
what makes you happy.
370
00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:12,037
-That’s sweet, babe.
-Well, I mean it.
371
00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:14,789
And if spoiling me rotten
makes you happy,
372
00:15:14,873 --> 00:15:17,334
I’m just gonna have
to respect that.
373
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,003
It does make me happy.
And to be honest,
374
00:15:20,045 --> 00:15:22,422
I don’t think about painting
at all anymore.
375
00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:28,219
(SOFT GUITAR
DRAMATIC FLOURISH) ♪
376
00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:32,057
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
377
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:34,059
I can’t believe it,
but we’re one win away
378
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:35,518
from the National Invitational.
379
00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:37,937
We’re gonna have
to be absolutely flawless today.
380
00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:39,647
Right.
381
00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:42,317
-Thanks, Gertrude.
-(GRUMBLES)
382
00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:44,194
Wait, Gertrude Stein?
383
00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:47,072
Yeah. After Cheermageddon,
she just lost it.
384
00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:49,824
We let her help out around here.
Keeps her off the streets.
385
00:15:49,908 --> 00:15:52,911
But the fact that it takes
only one mistake to end up that way,
386
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:54,287
it’s terrifying, you know?
387
00:15:54,371 --> 00:15:56,122
-(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-Yeah.
388
00:15:56,206 --> 00:15:58,708
I’ve never said that out loud
to anyone before.
389
00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:01,252
But I gotta admit,
talking about it with you, uh,
390
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,338
actually makes me
feel less afraid.
391
00:16:03,421 --> 00:16:05,590
(CLICKS TONGUE)
Aw, well that’s nice.
392
00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:07,550
And I can’t believe
I’m saying this,
393
00:16:07,592 --> 00:16:10,512
but I might actually be
in the process of forgiving you.
394
00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:13,348
Maybe a person
can get over a betrayal.
395
00:16:13,431 --> 00:16:14,849
They can?
396
00:16:14,933 --> 00:16:18,019
But could they get over
two betrayals?
397
00:16:18,103 --> 00:16:19,396
You know, hypothetically?
398
00:16:19,437 --> 00:16:21,898
No way, girl! One betrayal max.
399
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:25,110
But luckily,
that’s all we’re dealing with.
400
00:16:25,193 --> 00:16:27,153
Welp, off to stretch
before the big match.
401
00:16:27,237 --> 00:16:29,239
(CHUCKLES) Two betrayals.
Good one, Joan!
402
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:32,033
-(JOAN OF ARC GROANS SOFTLY)
-(OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
403
00:16:32,117 --> 00:16:35,578
-Girl’s locker room, Topher.
-TOPHER: Right, right, sorry.
404
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,956
-(UPLIFTING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-(BIRDS CHIRPING)
405
00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:46,214
Today’s the day, Cinnamon.
Redemption is in the air.
406
00:16:50,802 --> 00:16:52,470
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
407
00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:54,639
-Ah, undoubtedly a well-wisher.
-(GLASS SHATTERING)
408
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:55,807
Clone High High School,
409
00:16:55,890 --> 00:16:57,976
Principal Cinnamon
J. Scudworth speaking.
410
00:16:58,018 --> 00:16:59,144
What? (CHUCKLES)
411
00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:00,645
Oh, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.
412
00:17:00,729 --> 00:17:03,565
No. No, no, no.
A thousand times no.
413
00:17:03,648 --> 00:17:06,651
She’s on her way to the National
Snorkeling Invitational.
414
00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:09,487
She doesn’t want any part
of your art expo.
415
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:12,824
This is a classic
“talk to the hand” situation.
416
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:13,950
Unsubscribe.
417
00:17:13,992 --> 00:17:15,285
-FRIDA: Hey, Scudworth.
-(SCREAMS)
418
00:17:15,326 --> 00:17:17,662
Did you ever hear
from that art expo I entered?
419
00:17:17,704 --> 00:17:18,997
They were supposed to call here
420
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:21,499
because it’s weird for grown-ups
to call high school kids.
421
00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:25,045
It is weird for grown-ups
to call high school kids.
422
00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:27,922
(HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) I never
heard a thing from that contest!
423
00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:31,217
-(TELEPHONE RINGING)
-(RECEIVER CLATTERING)
424
00:17:31,301 --> 00:17:33,386
Oh, okay. Just wanted to check.
425
00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:35,847
I-- I guess snorkeling
really is my only option.
426
00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:39,476
Now, you’re talking!
See you out there, superstar!
427
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:42,520
-(WHEELS SQUEAKING)
-(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
428
00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:45,231
Don’t look at me like that.
Turn around.
429
00:17:46,608 --> 00:17:48,526
I can still see your eyes!
430
00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:52,697
Keep turning!
Oh, you are just like my mother!
431
00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:54,324
(CROWD CHEERING)
432
00:17:54,366 --> 00:17:56,326
CHEERLEADERS:
Sports! Sports! Sports! Sports!
433
00:17:56,368 --> 00:17:59,329
Sports! Sports! Sports! Sports!
434
00:17:59,371 --> 00:18:01,373
There you are!
What took you so long?
435
00:18:01,456 --> 00:18:03,249
I was kinda nervous,
so I went and painted some stuff
436
00:18:03,333 --> 00:18:04,417
to calm me down.
437
00:18:04,501 --> 00:18:06,336
This is the last painting
I’ll ever do
438
00:18:06,378 --> 00:18:09,047
since I’m obviously
very bad at it.
439
00:18:09,130 --> 00:18:10,423
-That you are!
-(PAINTING CLATTERING)
440
00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:12,717
Now get changed.
It’s winning time.
441
00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:16,388
Hey, Scudworth, just want
to say good luck tonight.
442
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:19,057
Hope we don't
"cramp" your style.
443
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:20,975
(GROUP LAUGHS)
444
00:18:21,976 --> 00:18:24,521
-'Cause you got a cramp.
-I know that, Abe!
445
00:18:25,897 --> 00:18:29,150
-(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-(TOILET RATTLING)
446
00:18:30,360 --> 00:18:33,321
(GRUNTS) Here you go!
447
00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:36,908
Are you sure we wanna do this?
448
00:18:36,950 --> 00:18:39,828
Don’t you get it?
Harriet’s not your friend, Joan.
449
00:18:39,911 --> 00:18:42,706
She’s just strong-arming you
into using your strong arms.
450
00:18:42,747 --> 00:18:43,998
You think she’s gonna be
your friend
451
00:18:44,082 --> 00:18:45,834
when the season is over?
She ain’t.
452
00:18:45,917 --> 00:18:49,421
But you know who is?
We, the Bleacher Creatures.
453
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:53,341
-The outcasts of society!
-The pariahs of the school!
454
00:18:53,425 --> 00:18:55,593
Also, can you Venmo me your dues
for this month?
455
00:18:55,677 --> 00:18:58,471
Bleacher Creatures forever!
456
00:19:00,265 --> 00:19:02,058
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-Folks, it’s the moment
457
00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:04,227
we’ve all been waiting for.
458
00:19:04,269 --> 00:19:05,770
-(CROWD CHEERS)
-(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
459
00:19:05,854 --> 00:19:07,772
Snorkelers, secure your goggles!
460
00:19:07,856 --> 00:19:09,399
(AIR HORN BLARES)
461
00:19:12,485 --> 00:19:13,778
Go, Frida! Point!
462
00:19:13,820 --> 00:19:16,865
Go, babe!
Mama needs a cashmere pashmina!
463
00:19:16,948 --> 00:19:19,284
Look over there! Look! Point!
Look! Point!
464
00:19:19,367 --> 00:19:21,411
See. The. Fish.
Point at that one!
465
00:19:21,453 --> 00:19:24,456
Point with your whole body!
Use the snorkel!
466
00:19:24,539 --> 00:19:26,166
Circle breathing,
circle breathing!
467
00:19:26,249 --> 00:19:28,293
Don't miss the grouper!
468
00:19:28,376 --> 00:19:30,879
-There's another one!
-Hey, I think this is yours.
469
00:19:30,962 --> 00:19:33,298
No, I don’t want it.
Get outta the way. I’m coaching.
470
00:19:33,381 --> 00:19:36,718
Excuse me, Frida gave this
to you as a gift.
471
00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:38,303
And it clearly meant a lot
to her
472
00:19:38,345 --> 00:19:40,263
if she went to the trouble
of painting it for you,
473
00:19:40,305 --> 00:19:41,765
and you’re gonna take it!
474
00:19:41,806 --> 00:19:44,309
Ugh! Fine,
I’ll take the stupid--
475
00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:47,729
-(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-(GASPS) But this isn’t stupid.
476
00:19:48,730 --> 00:19:49,981
It’s exquisite.
477
00:19:50,732 --> 00:19:51,900
What have I done?
478
00:19:53,485 --> 00:19:54,652
(CONTINUOUS DINGING)
479
00:19:57,322 --> 00:20:00,575
(INSPIRING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
480
00:20:02,243 --> 00:20:04,829
-(CROWD GASPING)
-(COUGHS, GROANS)
481
00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:06,998
Frida, are you okay?
What’s going on?
482
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,626
She got accepted
to the art expo.
483
00:20:09,668 --> 00:20:10,960
That’s where she belongs.
484
00:20:11,002 --> 00:20:13,296
No way. Congrats, babe!
485
00:20:13,338 --> 00:20:16,508
But the contest is starting now!
I’ll never make it in time!
486
00:20:16,591 --> 00:20:20,011
Oh, yes, you will.
This may be a one-horse town,
487
00:20:20,095 --> 00:20:21,805
but sometimes... (WHISTLES)
488
00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:24,474
-(HORSE NEIGHS)
-(CROWD GASPING)
489
00:20:24,516 --> 00:20:26,643
...one horse is all you need.
490
00:20:26,685 --> 00:20:29,187
Scudworth!
Get Frida back in that pool,
491
00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:31,481
or I will personally guarantee
492
00:20:31,523 --> 00:20:33,566
that you never get
outta this town!
493
00:20:33,650 --> 00:20:36,027
This isn’t about me.
It’s about Frida.
494
00:20:36,111 --> 00:20:37,862
And Frida is an artist.
495
00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:40,490
So, with all due respect,
Schneider Snorkelle
496
00:20:40,532 --> 00:20:43,451
-you can schuck it!
-Yeah, schuck off!
497
00:20:44,703 --> 00:20:46,204
-All right!
-Let’s go, babe!
498
00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:49,958
-Hi-ya!
-(HORSE NEIGHS)
499
00:20:50,041 --> 00:20:54,713
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(INSPIRING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
500
00:20:59,050 --> 00:21:00,969
BYSTANDER: (SCREAMING)
Watch out for that horse!
501
00:21:01,052 --> 00:21:02,053
(CAR CRASHING)
502
00:21:02,095 --> 00:21:04,347
-(SOLDIER SCREAMING)
-(HELICOPTER THRUMMING)
503
00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:06,725
-(SOLDIER SCREAMING)
-(EXPLOSIONS)
504
00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:08,226
-(FIRE TRUCK BLARING)
-(DOLPHIN SQUEAKING)
505
00:21:08,309 --> 00:21:10,729
Ooh. I hope everyone’s okay.
506
00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,022
Hey, since Cleo left
507
00:21:12,063 --> 00:21:13,565
and she’s the top
of the pyramid,
508
00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:15,150
we should probably
just call it, huh?
509
00:21:15,233 --> 00:21:18,403
No way! A scout from Big City
College University is here!
510
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:19,571
We’ll have to make some
adjustments.
511
00:21:19,654 --> 00:21:20,864
I’ll move to top left
512
00:21:20,905 --> 00:21:22,532
and have Abigail shift
to Cleo’s spot.
513
00:21:22,574 --> 00:21:24,701
Uh, wait,
so you’ll be holding...
514
00:21:24,743 --> 00:21:28,580
The all-important first letter.
But as long as you’re the base,
515
00:21:28,663 --> 00:21:30,165
I know we can do it.
516
00:21:30,248 --> 00:21:32,167
-(OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-(BLEACHER CREATURES LAUGH)
517
00:21:32,250 --> 00:21:33,335
(CROWD CHEERS)
518
00:21:33,418 --> 00:21:36,171
(CHANTING) Let’s hear you
scream for our snorkel team!
519
00:21:36,254 --> 00:21:37,922
(CHEERLEADERS CHEERING)
520
00:21:41,009 --> 00:21:43,636
-(GRUNTS)
-(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
521
00:21:47,807 --> 00:21:50,352
GERTRUDE STEIN: I used
to be somebody.
522
00:21:51,478 --> 00:21:52,729
Gertrude Stein?
523
00:21:52,771 --> 00:21:56,858
No! I spelled a dirty word.
Now, I’m Dirty Gerty!
524
00:21:57,942 --> 00:22:00,445
(CACKLES, SCREECHES)
525
00:22:00,528 --> 00:22:03,656
I made a nest out of pom-poms!
(CACKLES)
526
00:22:03,740 --> 00:22:07,243
Harriet! Don’t!
You can’t put up that letter!
527
00:22:07,285 --> 00:22:08,912
What? Why?
528
00:22:08,953 --> 00:22:11,122
If you don’t want
to end up like Dirty Gerty,
529
00:22:11,206 --> 00:22:12,540
you gotta trust me.
530
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:17,337
Ready, team? Three, two, one!
531
00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:19,756
(CROWD CHEERING)
532
00:22:19,798 --> 00:22:22,967
-One high!
-As in, we’re all one!
533
00:22:23,051 --> 00:22:24,761
No matter what our differences,
534
00:22:24,803 --> 00:22:26,888
-we’re still One High!
-(LAUGHS) Ah!
535
00:22:26,971 --> 00:22:28,139
(SIGHS)
536
00:22:28,223 --> 00:22:31,101
TOPHER: “One High”?
What happened to “Bone High”?
537
00:22:31,142 --> 00:22:34,813
One High is like implying
all of us are high...
538
00:22:34,854 --> 00:22:38,358
on marijuana pot!
That’s a sick burn.
539
00:22:38,441 --> 00:22:42,612
Violence was chosen today.
Hurrah! One High!
540
00:22:42,654 --> 00:22:43,822
-What just happened?
-(GRUNTS)
541
00:22:43,863 --> 00:22:45,031
Who did this?
542
00:22:45,115 --> 00:22:47,659
-Harriet, I’m a jerk.
-(UPLIFTING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
543
00:22:47,701 --> 00:22:51,287
I was mad at you,
so I was going to betray you...
544
00:22:51,329 --> 00:22:54,082
Again. But I couldn’t go
through with it
545
00:22:54,165 --> 00:22:57,252
and not just because I have
terrible follow through.
546
00:22:57,335 --> 00:23:00,463
I understand if you go
right back to hating me again.
547
00:23:01,673 --> 00:23:04,926
Wait! The important thing is,
you told me.
548
00:23:05,010 --> 00:23:06,261
And to be honest,
549
00:23:06,344 --> 00:23:08,096
I really do wanna be
friends again.
550
00:23:08,179 --> 00:23:11,266
-(GASPS) Really?
-(SHUSHES) In secret.
551
00:23:11,349 --> 00:23:13,268
You’re still a social outcast,
remember?
552
00:23:13,351 --> 00:23:15,311
I would be honored
to be your friend
553
00:23:15,353 --> 00:23:17,188
that you’re too embarrassed
to admit you’re friends with
554
00:23:17,272 --> 00:23:18,481
to your other friends.
555
00:23:18,523 --> 00:23:21,317
Well, I guess,
I’ll see you around...
556
00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:22,902
(WHISPERING) ...friend.
557
00:23:24,571 --> 00:23:26,489
(CHANTING) We tried!
Yeah, yeah, we tried!
558
00:23:26,531 --> 00:23:27,532
ABE LINCOLN: What’d we do?
559
00:23:27,615 --> 00:23:29,701
(CHANTING) Yeah, we tried!
Yeah, yeah, we tried!
560
00:23:29,784 --> 00:23:30,827
So hard.
561
00:23:30,869 --> 00:23:32,912
Why don’t you go hit
the showers, fellas?
562
00:23:32,996 --> 00:23:33,913
(JFK HUMMING)
563
00:23:33,997 --> 00:23:35,081
-(TOWEL WHIPPING)
-(JFK YELPS)
564
00:23:35,165 --> 00:23:37,792
(SIGHS) Looks like
it didn’t go our way.
565
00:23:37,876 --> 00:23:40,170
It was a blood bath.
But what about you?
566
00:23:40,211 --> 00:23:41,921
How was the art expo?
567
00:23:42,005 --> 00:23:44,382
They gave me this.
I wanted to turn it down
568
00:23:44,424 --> 00:23:46,718
'cause giving awards
for art is kinda stupid.
569
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:49,637
But I thought it would look good
on a special someone.
570
00:23:50,889 --> 00:23:52,515
Me? What?
571
00:23:52,557 --> 00:23:55,060
I know that wasn’t easy,
what you did for me today.
572
00:23:55,143 --> 00:23:57,437
But I really appreciate it,
Coach Scuddy Buddy.
573
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:00,857
She said the nickname
I assigned myself.
574
00:24:02,317 --> 00:24:04,778
(UPLIFTING MUSIC
INTENSIFIES) ♪
575
00:24:11,451 --> 00:24:13,620
(MUSIC FADES) ♪
576
00:24:13,703 --> 00:24:18,583
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
577
00:25:02,460 --> 00:25:04,337
(SONG CONCLUDES) ♪
578
00:25:04,387 --> 00:25:08,937
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