All language subtitles for The Wonder Years s06e13 Stones.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,535 --> 00:00:05,403 [ Joe Cocker's "With a Little Help From My Friends" plays ] 2 00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:20,251 ? Baby ? 3 00:00:20,253 --> 00:00:22,921 ? High with a little help from my friends ? 4 00:00:22,923 --> 00:00:25,156 ? Said I'm gonna make it with my friends ? 5 00:00:25,158 --> 00:00:27,859 ? Try with a little help from my friends ? 6 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,928 ? Oh, oh, I'm gonna keep on tryin' ? 7 00:00:29,930 --> 00:00:32,797 ? Get by with a little help from my friends ? 8 00:00:32,799 --> 00:00:35,033 ? I'm gonna keep on tryin', now, babe ? 9 00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:38,737 ? Ooh, ooh, ooh ? 10 00:00:40,207 --> 00:00:41,272 [ School bell rings ] 11 00:00:41,274 --> 00:00:42,307 And so I figured, 12 00:00:42,309 --> 00:00:44,442 Since the program was about Indians, 13 00:00:44,444 --> 00:00:45,777 That I should watch it, 14 00:00:45,779 --> 00:00:47,879 E-even though it meant skippin' the homework. 15 00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,180 Teen logic... 16 00:00:49,182 --> 00:00:51,583 At 16, it was a tool we used with abandon. 17 00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:52,717 'cause remember... 18 00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,353 You said there'd be Indian stuff on the test. 19 00:00:55,355 --> 00:00:58,123 And at what point did you realize 20 00:00:58,125 --> 00:01:00,792 "Kojak" was not an Indian name? 21 00:01:00,794 --> 00:01:02,794 Um... 22 00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:04,296 [ school bell rings ] 23 00:01:04,298 --> 00:01:07,732 And this logic came in all shapes and sizes. 24 00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:09,835 I don't care who he takes. 25 00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:12,304 Who wants a steady boyfriend, anyway? 26 00:01:12,306 --> 00:01:15,606 We used it to help us through life's tough moments. 27 00:01:15,608 --> 00:01:19,310 I mean, all that making out just gets your hair all sweaty! 28 00:01:21,181 --> 00:01:22,914 So, what's the big deal? 29 00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:24,982 It helped explain our behavioral oddities. 30 00:01:24,984 --> 00:01:26,618 If they don't want a few laughs, 31 00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:29,020 Then they shouldn't hand out frogs in biology. 32 00:01:29,022 --> 00:01:30,856 But never was our logic more useful 33 00:01:30,858 --> 00:01:33,491 Than when it lent credence to a really hot rumor. 34 00:01:33,493 --> 00:01:35,393 This is totally ridiculous, chuck. 35 00:01:35,395 --> 00:01:36,962 I swear to god, it's true. 36 00:01:36,964 --> 00:01:38,730 I'm sorry... the Rolling Stones do not come 37 00:01:38,732 --> 00:01:40,966 Within 300 miles of this town. 38 00:01:40,968 --> 00:01:43,869 It was a dull week in the winter of '73, 39 00:01:43,871 --> 00:01:46,271 So the rumor had spread like wildfire. 40 00:01:46,273 --> 00:01:48,206 I'm tellin' ya... Friday night, 41 00:01:48,208 --> 00:01:50,842 The Stones are gonna be at a place called Joe's 42 00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:52,176 Out on highway 9. 43 00:01:52,178 --> 00:01:54,011 Right. 44 00:01:54,013 --> 00:01:57,315 By junior year, I'd been down the old rumor trail 45 00:01:57,317 --> 00:01:58,516 One too many times. 46 00:01:58,518 --> 00:02:01,453 There's no way. Paul, tell him. 47 00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:04,389 It's a zillion to 1. It's not gonna happen. 48 00:02:04,391 --> 00:02:06,090 I rest my case. 49 00:02:06,092 --> 00:02:08,259 Maybe I was a little tough on the guy, 50 00:02:08,261 --> 00:02:09,760 But it was so clear to anyone 51 00:02:09,762 --> 00:02:11,829 With even a semblance of intelligence. 52 00:02:11,831 --> 00:02:15,400 Hey, you guys hear about the stones? 53 00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:18,102 Unfortunately, a semblance of intelligence 54 00:02:18,104 --> 00:02:19,403 Was in short supply. 55 00:02:19,405 --> 00:02:20,772 I don't want to hear it. 56 00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:23,174 Okay, I'm sorry. I lost my mind. 57 00:02:23,176 --> 00:02:24,408 Fine. 58 00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:26,310 It's just, I-i heard that for a while, 59 00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:29,881 This Joe was like the sixth Rolling Stone, you know? 60 00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:33,251 Great... insanity had taken over my school... 61 00:02:33,253 --> 00:02:35,286 [ siren wails ] 62 00:02:35,288 --> 00:02:38,022 And the law had taken over vine street. 63 00:02:39,292 --> 00:02:42,126 Oh, man. 64 00:02:42,128 --> 00:02:43,928 [ Siren fades ] 65 00:02:45,865 --> 00:02:48,432 Why don't you plead insanity, Kev? 66 00:02:48,434 --> 00:02:49,734 Shut up. 67 00:02:52,739 --> 00:02:54,973 May I see your license, please? 68 00:02:56,075 --> 00:02:59,377 Of course, a situation like this required I reach back 69 00:02:59,379 --> 00:03:02,514 For a little of my own teen logic. 70 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,148 You realize that it's impossible 71 00:03:04,150 --> 00:03:06,190 To go the speed limit on this street? 72 00:03:07,153 --> 00:03:08,786 Is that a fact? 73 00:03:08,788 --> 00:03:10,254 Okay... 74 00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:14,025 Here's the thing... 75 00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:16,093 Grades are really important to me. 76 00:03:16,095 --> 00:03:18,529 So I was really trying to get home... 77 00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:19,897 To study. 78 00:03:19,899 --> 00:03:23,534 Because... I know that... 79 00:03:23,536 --> 00:03:26,638 A lot of criminals got bad grades in school. 80 00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:30,708 S-so that if... Kids got better grades... 81 00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:35,713 By studying hard, then there would be less... 82 00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:38,082 Criminals around. 83 00:03:41,955 --> 00:03:44,188 Wow. Yeah. 84 00:03:46,225 --> 00:03:50,261 But when it came to logic, some guys had the knack... 85 00:03:50,263 --> 00:03:52,430 You must make your parents proud. 86 00:03:54,634 --> 00:03:57,402 And some guys had the ticket. 87 00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:58,603 Have a nice day. 88 00:03:58,605 --> 00:04:01,038 All of which added up to one thing. 89 00:04:01,040 --> 00:04:03,475 You had me sold. 90 00:04:03,477 --> 00:04:07,144 Somehow, I was gonna have to explain this to... 91 00:04:07,146 --> 00:04:08,446 It was great! 92 00:04:08,448 --> 00:04:09,747 My Dad. 93 00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:13,184 This guy, Zeke, comes in with a cowboy hat, a string tie, 94 00:04:13,186 --> 00:04:15,386 And he tells me he needs a truckload of furniture. 95 00:04:15,388 --> 00:04:17,088 [ Chuckles ] that's wonderful, honey. 96 00:04:17,090 --> 00:04:18,656 It was our biggest order yet! 97 00:04:18,658 --> 00:04:19,990 Still, that night, 98 00:04:19,992 --> 00:04:23,694 The furniture gods were smiling on me. 99 00:04:23,696 --> 00:04:24,728 Dad? 100 00:04:24,730 --> 00:04:26,397 Yeah. 101 00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:29,067 Yep, this was gonna be a piece of cake. 102 00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:31,069 You know that... S-stretch of road 103 00:04:31,071 --> 00:04:32,336 On vine street? 104 00:04:32,338 --> 00:04:34,472 - Mm-hmm. - Well... 105 00:04:34,474 --> 00:04:37,709 I was driving there this afternoon, and... 106 00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:40,545 You know, now it's like the guy wants to be my best friend. 107 00:04:40,547 --> 00:04:43,014 [ Chuckling ] I know. His wife called this morning. 108 00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:45,316 - She did? - Mm-hmm. 109 00:04:45,318 --> 00:04:47,785 They want to take us dancing tomorrow night. 110 00:04:49,188 --> 00:04:50,688 Oh. 111 00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:53,458 Square dancing. 112 00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:54,558 What? 113 00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:56,628 Uh-oh. 114 00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:57,661 [ chortles ] 115 00:04:57,663 --> 00:05:00,231 Square dancing?! [ laughs ] 116 00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:02,500 [ Utensil clanks ] 117 00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:04,435 Forget it. We're not goin'. 118 00:05:04,437 --> 00:05:07,004 Suddenly, I watched his mood change 119 00:05:07,006 --> 00:05:09,840 Faster than you could say "Sons of the Pioneers." 120 00:05:09,842 --> 00:05:13,477 Are you sure, honey? It might be good for business. 121 00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:16,514 Oh, brother. 122 00:05:16,516 --> 00:05:18,116 [ Wayne clapping ] 123 00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:20,685 ? Grab your partner, do-si-do ? 124 00:05:23,356 --> 00:05:24,889 Sorry. 125 00:05:24,891 --> 00:05:27,759 [ Humming ] 126 00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:30,061 What are you lookin' at? 127 00:05:31,731 --> 00:05:32,897 Nothing. 128 00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:34,499 Now, I may have been a criminal, 129 00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:37,869 But I wasn't stupid enough to try my luck right then. 130 00:05:37,871 --> 00:05:39,937 Nothing at all. 131 00:05:39,939 --> 00:05:43,273 It just wouldn't be logical. 132 00:05:43,275 --> 00:05:44,475 Speaking of which... 133 00:05:44,477 --> 00:05:46,678 Absolute confirmation. 134 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,612 All right, Gary Zerwinski's sister... 135 00:05:48,614 --> 00:05:50,114 She's a stewardess, right? 136 00:05:50,116 --> 00:05:53,417 She met Keith Richards on a flight to New York last year. 137 00:05:53,419 --> 00:05:55,053 Ooh! 138 00:05:55,055 --> 00:05:56,020 Yeah, so? So? 139 00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:57,287 I don't believe this. 140 00:05:57,289 --> 00:05:58,823 Anyways, they got to new York, 141 00:05:58,825 --> 00:06:00,858 They had a couple drinks... plural... 142 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:03,260 And now the stones are back in the U.S. Of a., 143 00:06:03,262 --> 00:06:05,529 And who does Keith Richards want to see? 144 00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:07,298 Shirley... 145 00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:08,532 Zerwinski. 146 00:06:08,534 --> 00:06:10,568 Voil�! 147 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:11,736 I'd had enough. 148 00:06:11,738 --> 00:06:14,238 I was the lone bastion of reason. 149 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:15,807 What?! 150 00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:18,142 You people are all crazy. 151 00:06:18,144 --> 00:06:20,345 Kevin, what's your problem? 152 00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:22,012 Huh? 153 00:06:22,014 --> 00:06:24,048 I mean, what if it could happen? 154 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,884 And what if we could be a part of it? 155 00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:29,654 Now, keep in mind, this was my best girl, 156 00:06:29,656 --> 00:06:31,489 My one true love. 157 00:06:31,491 --> 00:06:32,590 Think of it, Kevin. 158 00:06:32,592 --> 00:06:34,792 A night we could share with each other 159 00:06:34,794 --> 00:06:36,394 For the rest of our lives, 160 00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:38,863 And maybe someday tell our children about. 161 00:06:38,865 --> 00:06:40,764 Children? 162 00:06:40,766 --> 00:06:44,535 So, when she spun her dreams about magical nights 163 00:06:44,537 --> 00:06:46,604 And miracles and children... 164 00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:50,141 I could never risk missing something like that. 165 00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:52,743 What else could I say to those big brown eyes, 166 00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:54,044 Except... 167 00:06:58,884 --> 00:07:00,618 Who's paying for gas? 168 00:07:02,589 --> 00:07:04,488 - All right! - What the heck? 169 00:07:04,490 --> 00:07:06,891 There was a certain logic to this whole thing. 170 00:07:06,893 --> 00:07:08,893 And what did I have to lose? 171 00:07:08,895 --> 00:07:11,295 [ knock on door ] 172 00:07:11,297 --> 00:07:13,264 Kevin? Is this yours? 173 00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:14,532 Except my life. 174 00:07:14,534 --> 00:07:15,700 It went through the wash, and I... 175 00:07:15,702 --> 00:07:17,368 Honey, could you, uh... 176 00:07:17,370 --> 00:07:18,469 Oh. 177 00:07:18,471 --> 00:07:19,904 Oh, what's this? 178 00:07:19,906 --> 00:07:21,839 It's... Nothing. 179 00:07:21,841 --> 00:07:23,107 It's... 180 00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:25,342 It's a speeding ticket. Is this yours? 181 00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:27,444 Ii don't think so. 182 00:07:27,446 --> 00:07:30,214 It's got your name on it. 183 00:07:30,216 --> 00:07:33,051 Oh, yeah. That... that's mine. 184 00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:36,220 You want to tell me about it? 185 00:07:36,222 --> 00:07:37,421 Nope. 186 00:07:37,423 --> 00:07:41,459 Well... Dad, you know vine street? 187 00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:43,327 Everyone speeds there. 188 00:07:43,329 --> 00:07:45,063 I don't. 189 00:07:45,065 --> 00:07:46,330 Stay out of it, Wayne. 190 00:07:46,332 --> 00:07:48,632 [ Chortling ] 191 00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:50,501 So, what happened? 192 00:07:50,503 --> 00:07:54,338 It's just... Some tickets are really unfair. 193 00:07:54,340 --> 00:07:57,208 Yeah. I know they are. 194 00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:58,910 So how fast were you goin'? 195 00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:00,444 Well, that's the thing. 196 00:08:00,446 --> 00:08:02,346 That cop didn't even have a radar. 197 00:08:02,348 --> 00:08:03,981 He just... Guessed! 198 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,350 Come on, Kev. How fast? 199 00:08:06,352 --> 00:08:08,452 I figured, this was my father. 200 00:08:08,454 --> 00:08:10,922 He'd been in a few scrapes in his life. 201 00:08:10,924 --> 00:08:12,723 He'd understand. 202 00:08:12,725 --> 00:08:15,592 Just... Tell me the truth. 203 00:08:15,594 --> 00:08:19,363 And even though logic screamed at me not to... 204 00:08:19,365 --> 00:08:21,699 50 tops. 205 00:08:21,701 --> 00:08:23,801 I went with the facts. 206 00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:27,639 50?! 207 00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:29,640 In a 30-mile zone?! 208 00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:31,642 You're grounded! 209 00:08:33,079 --> 00:08:37,348 I may have miscalculated. 210 00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:38,549 Dad, can we at least talk about this? 211 00:08:38,551 --> 00:08:39,751 I don't want to talk about it. 212 00:08:39,752 --> 00:08:40,951 - But... - I don't want to hear about it. 213 00:08:40,953 --> 00:08:42,153 Dad, I have to go out tonight. 214 00:08:42,154 --> 00:08:43,654 Why? 215 00:08:43,656 --> 00:08:46,490 I knew I had to capture the magic the way Winnie had. 216 00:08:46,492 --> 00:08:48,726 This wasn't about one little night out. 217 00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:51,462 It was about our dreams, our children. 218 00:08:51,464 --> 00:08:55,433 The Rolling Stones are playing at some dive called Joe's. 219 00:08:57,236 --> 00:09:00,070 Hmmm. 220 00:09:00,072 --> 00:09:03,074 And if that stirring tribute wasn't enough... 221 00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:05,810 [ car horn plays "Dixie" ] 222 00:09:05,812 --> 00:09:07,011 What was that? 223 00:09:07,013 --> 00:09:09,480 Hey, you, Arnold! Get on out here! 224 00:09:09,482 --> 00:09:11,949 [ Chuckling ] whoa, Dad, uh... 225 00:09:11,951 --> 00:09:14,284 Roy and dale are here. [ chortles ] 226 00:09:14,286 --> 00:09:15,419 Great. 227 00:09:15,421 --> 00:09:17,321 - So, uh... - [ Sighs ] 228 00:09:17,323 --> 00:09:18,989 Dad, what do you say? 229 00:09:18,991 --> 00:09:21,792 Kevin, I'm going square dancing, 230 00:09:21,794 --> 00:09:23,794 And when I get home, that car of yours 231 00:09:23,796 --> 00:09:27,965 Better not have moved one inch off its oil spot. 232 00:09:27,967 --> 00:09:31,803 And somehow, I knew the man meant every single word. 233 00:09:31,805 --> 00:09:34,471 He even said it in sign language. 234 00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:40,310 Well... See ya, scrum. 235 00:09:40,312 --> 00:09:42,012 Have fun. [ Chortles ] 236 00:09:42,014 --> 00:09:43,614 [ Door closes ] 237 00:09:43,616 --> 00:09:45,182 Right. 238 00:09:45,184 --> 00:09:49,253 And there wasn't anything more I could say, except... 239 00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:51,321 Hello. Mrs. Cooper? 240 00:09:51,323 --> 00:09:53,157 Is Winnie there? 241 00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:56,727 I had no choice. I would have to cancel. 242 00:09:56,729 --> 00:10:00,131 And that's when I discovered a catastrophe in the making, 243 00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:02,466 An event of monumental significance, 244 00:10:02,468 --> 00:10:04,001 A potential disaster 245 00:10:04,003 --> 00:10:06,503 That could alter the course of the universe. 246 00:10:06,505 --> 00:10:08,038 And the reason was... 247 00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:09,573 We're out of milk. 248 00:10:09,575 --> 00:10:12,276 We were out of milk. 249 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:16,380 But it wasn't just that we were out of milk. 250 00:10:16,382 --> 00:10:18,382 If my Dad got up the next morning 251 00:10:18,384 --> 00:10:21,018 And couldn't have his cereal... 252 00:10:21,020 --> 00:10:23,053 Things like this didn't just happen. 253 00:10:23,055 --> 00:10:24,188 Kevin? 254 00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:25,489 There were forces at work here. 255 00:10:25,491 --> 00:10:26,657 Hello? 256 00:10:26,659 --> 00:10:28,225 Forces that demanded I go out and... 257 00:10:28,227 --> 00:10:29,660 Kevin?! 258 00:10:29,662 --> 00:10:32,997 Winnie? I'll pick you up in 10 minutes. 259 00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:35,632 [ Engine turns over ] 260 00:10:35,634 --> 00:10:38,736 Okay, I'd get the milk afterwards. 261 00:10:38,738 --> 00:10:41,172 That way, it would be fresher. 262 00:10:41,174 --> 00:10:44,108 Hey, it wasn't like I was defying my father. 263 00:10:44,110 --> 00:10:47,078 He needed the milk for his morning cereal. 264 00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:49,747 And even if it was stretching teenage logic 265 00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:50,982 To its maximum... 266 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,483 [ brakes squeal ] 267 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:56,287 He had specifically said not to move my car. 268 00:11:06,732 --> 00:11:09,900 And so that night, in a semi-stolen car, 269 00:11:09,902 --> 00:11:13,270 We were en route to the experience of a lifetime... 270 00:11:13,272 --> 00:11:17,975 Me, my girl, and Larry, Moe, and curly. 271 00:11:19,579 --> 00:11:21,145 Hey, you want some? 272 00:11:21,147 --> 00:11:23,114 Hey, no food in the car! 273 00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:24,848 This isn't food! Here. 274 00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:26,183 Thanks. [ Horns honking ] 275 00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:27,918 Whoops. [ Laughs ] 276 00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:30,154 Oh, man. Nice move. 277 00:11:30,156 --> 00:11:31,856 Hey, come on, Kevin. Lighten up, man. 278 00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:33,691 Yeah, I mean, it's not like it's your car anyway. 279 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:36,394 Great... I was growing concerned 280 00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:39,163 For my father's car, 281 00:11:39,165 --> 00:11:42,733 And my friends were turning it into a cheap motel. 282 00:11:42,735 --> 00:11:44,869 Where is this place, anyway? 283 00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:46,770 Just outside of Hinckley. 284 00:11:46,772 --> 00:11:49,640 Hinckley? Well, that's an hour away. 285 00:11:49,642 --> 00:11:52,310 Well, there's no way I'm driving to Hinckley. 286 00:11:52,312 --> 00:11:53,911 Well, what did you expect, Kev? 287 00:11:53,913 --> 00:11:56,446 The Rolling Stones are gonna come to your door? 288 00:11:56,448 --> 00:11:58,049 [ laughter ] 289 00:11:58,051 --> 00:12:01,385 No, Paul, I didn't expect them to come at all. Remember? 290 00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:04,821 Fine... you try to maintain some kind of maturity, 291 00:12:04,823 --> 00:12:07,358 And you're suddenly the bad guy. 292 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:10,261 Geez. What a downer. 293 00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:12,296 Okay. We'll go to Hinckley. 294 00:12:12,298 --> 00:12:14,231 [ laughter ] 295 00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:16,534 After all, I was in this deep. 296 00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:21,005 So, 47 miles, 3 pit stops, 297 00:12:21,007 --> 00:12:23,807 And any number of squashed raisinets later, 298 00:12:23,809 --> 00:12:25,209 We arrived at... 299 00:12:25,211 --> 00:12:27,544 Here it is... "Joe's place." 300 00:12:27,546 --> 00:12:30,414 [ owl hooting ] 301 00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:34,284 Just one little problem. 302 00:12:34,286 --> 00:12:37,120 The who? 303 00:12:37,122 --> 00:12:40,825 Not the Who... the Rolling Stones. 304 00:12:40,827 --> 00:12:42,727 [ Slow-tempo country music playing ] 305 00:12:42,729 --> 00:12:44,695 Hey, Joe. 306 00:12:44,697 --> 00:12:46,097 Hmm? 307 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:48,499 You got the Rolling Stones comin' here? 308 00:12:48,501 --> 00:12:50,133 The who? 309 00:12:50,135 --> 00:12:52,904 I reckon not. 310 00:12:52,906 --> 00:12:55,339 And, faced with the first disappointment 311 00:12:55,341 --> 00:12:57,707 Of the evening... [ Exhales sharply ] 312 00:12:57,709 --> 00:12:59,410 We did what red-blooded teenagers did best. 313 00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:02,346 You mean we drove over an hour... 314 00:13:02,348 --> 00:13:04,047 And there's no Rolling Stones? 315 00:13:04,049 --> 00:13:05,249 We turned on each other. 316 00:13:05,251 --> 00:13:07,485 Well, don't look at me. It's not my fault. 317 00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:09,920 And then we passed the buck. 318 00:13:09,922 --> 00:13:13,690 What? It's not mine, either. 319 00:13:13,692 --> 00:13:15,492 And we pointed fingers. 320 00:13:15,494 --> 00:13:17,394 No way! It was chuck! 321 00:13:17,396 --> 00:13:20,064 Hey, look at this! There are a whole mess of "Joe's"! 322 00:13:21,868 --> 00:13:23,200 Hey, you! 323 00:13:23,202 --> 00:13:24,968 That's my yellow pages! 324 00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:26,537 Whoops. Uh, yeah, let's hit it. 325 00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:28,071 Yeah. Come on. 326 00:13:28,073 --> 00:13:29,306 Bye! 327 00:13:31,577 --> 00:13:33,377 Come back here! 328 00:13:35,047 --> 00:13:36,546 Come on! Gun it! 329 00:13:36,548 --> 00:13:39,449 And with that, we were once again off on our mission. 330 00:13:39,451 --> 00:13:41,685 [ siren wailing ] only this time... 331 00:13:41,687 --> 00:13:44,655 We had company. 332 00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:47,358 [ siren continues ] 333 00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:49,160 [ Amplified ] pull your vehicle to the side of the road! 334 00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:51,595 - I don't believe this! - Now! 335 00:13:53,866 --> 00:13:55,966 Holy cow. 336 00:14:05,978 --> 00:14:07,744 It was almost ironic. 337 00:14:07,746 --> 00:14:10,314 We had traveled halfway across the world 338 00:14:10,316 --> 00:14:13,250 To get busted for stealing page 219 339 00:14:13,252 --> 00:14:14,818 Of the bell telephone book. 340 00:14:14,820 --> 00:14:18,122 Kind of a Jackrabbit start there, wasn't it, pal? 341 00:14:18,124 --> 00:14:20,724 Uh, uh... 342 00:14:20,726 --> 00:14:22,994 No, sir. 343 00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:26,830 I-I mean... Yes, sir. 344 00:14:26,832 --> 00:14:28,499 May I see your driver's license, please? 345 00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:32,636 And no amount of logic was gonna get me out of this one. 346 00:14:32,638 --> 00:14:35,772 [ mooing ] 347 00:14:35,774 --> 00:14:38,008 I was stuck... dead. 348 00:14:38,010 --> 00:14:39,043 [ sighs ] 349 00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:42,512 Officer? 350 00:14:42,514 --> 00:14:44,248 I can explain. 351 00:14:44,250 --> 00:14:45,783 Until... 352 00:14:45,785 --> 00:14:47,952 This is all my fault. 353 00:14:47,954 --> 00:14:51,254 Kevin is the best driver we know. 354 00:14:51,256 --> 00:14:53,490 And he was gonna stay home tonight, 355 00:14:53,492 --> 00:14:55,459 But he knew that if he did, 356 00:14:55,461 --> 00:14:57,594 We may have gotten rides to... 357 00:14:57,596 --> 00:15:00,364 Go see my grandmother in the hospital 358 00:15:00,366 --> 00:15:02,566 With someone who isn't a very good driver at all. 359 00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:03,833 And I know he was afraid 360 00:15:03,835 --> 00:15:06,203 That we might end up in some terrible crash... 361 00:15:06,205 --> 00:15:07,871 Or worse, and... 362 00:15:07,873 --> 00:15:09,639 That he might spend the rest of his life 363 00:15:09,641 --> 00:15:13,744 Wondering what might have been if only... He had been driving. 364 00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:17,013 It was the most obviously transparent, 365 00:15:17,015 --> 00:15:18,515 Clumsy piece of teen logic 366 00:15:18,517 --> 00:15:21,885 I had ever heard in my entire life. 367 00:15:22,888 --> 00:15:25,121 Okay, I understand. 368 00:15:25,123 --> 00:15:27,825 You drive careful, son. 369 00:15:27,827 --> 00:15:29,994 And he bought it. 370 00:15:29,996 --> 00:15:32,295 Yes, sir. 371 00:15:32,297 --> 00:15:34,331 And take care of this young lady. 372 00:15:34,333 --> 00:15:37,568 And you... say hi to your grandma. 373 00:15:38,804 --> 00:15:41,939 It was incredible. It was unbelievable. 374 00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:44,374 It was impossible. 375 00:15:44,376 --> 00:15:47,210 [ laughs ] 376 00:15:47,212 --> 00:15:49,446 And suddenly, it was clear... 377 00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:51,648 That this night was special. 378 00:15:51,650 --> 00:15:53,450 It was a matter of destiny. 379 00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:56,253 Something magical was awaiting us. 380 00:15:56,255 --> 00:15:58,356 And as we went from Smokey Joe's 381 00:15:58,358 --> 00:16:01,925 To Billy Joe's to Joe Joe's to ho Joe's, 382 00:16:01,927 --> 00:16:03,327 We never gave up. 383 00:16:03,329 --> 00:16:06,397 Because it all boiled down to one thing... 384 00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:08,299 The Rolling Stones... 385 00:16:08,301 --> 00:16:10,368 I knew it! 386 00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:12,870 I knew it. 387 00:16:12,872 --> 00:16:15,106 Would be at Wally's. 388 00:16:18,511 --> 00:16:21,945 And we'd found it. It was amazing. 389 00:16:21,947 --> 00:16:23,913 - Our very own... - This is it! 390 00:16:23,915 --> 00:16:25,716 Woodstock. 391 00:16:25,718 --> 00:16:29,019 This is unbelievable. 392 00:16:29,021 --> 00:16:30,821 I told you, Kevin. I told you. 393 00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,389 Yeah. 394 00:16:32,391 --> 00:16:36,060 Each of us knew every moment of our youth would be defined 395 00:16:36,062 --> 00:16:38,762 By its relationship in time to this one. 396 00:16:38,764 --> 00:16:42,499 It was our moment, and we were there. 397 00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:44,335 [ crowd chanting "mick!" ] 398 00:16:52,544 --> 00:16:54,177 There he is! 399 00:16:54,179 --> 00:16:55,912 [ Chanting continues ] 400 00:16:57,316 --> 00:16:58,749 Who is that? 401 00:16:58,751 --> 00:17:01,419 And, of course, it wasn't mick. 402 00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:02,887 It was wally... 403 00:17:02,889 --> 00:17:05,422 Now, listen, you kids! This is the last time I'm gonna tell ya! 404 00:17:05,424 --> 00:17:06,923 And his bullhorn. 405 00:17:06,925 --> 00:17:10,561 The Rolling Stones ain't here, and they ain't gonna be here! 406 00:17:10,563 --> 00:17:12,463 [ Crowd groans ] 407 00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:15,232 And wally let us know, in no uncertain terms, 408 00:17:15,234 --> 00:17:17,901 That the crowning event of our youth... 409 00:17:17,903 --> 00:17:21,071 The only people gonna be here is the police! 410 00:17:21,073 --> 00:17:22,473 Was a bust. 411 00:17:26,979 --> 00:17:29,112 Kevin, I'm really sorry. 412 00:17:29,114 --> 00:17:30,481 [ Chuckles ] nah, forget about it. 413 00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:31,781 What the heck. 414 00:17:31,783 --> 00:17:34,885 This wasn't the time for "I told you sos" 415 00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:35,953 Or rubbing it in. 416 00:17:35,955 --> 00:17:37,588 No, you were the only one who knew 417 00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:39,056 How ridiculous we sounded. 418 00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,224 Ah, come on. 419 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:42,993 I mean, we came here, we had a good time. 420 00:17:42,995 --> 00:17:45,028 What more could you ask? 421 00:17:45,030 --> 00:17:46,897 Right, guys? 422 00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:47,964 It felt pretty good. 423 00:17:47,966 --> 00:17:49,733 I was generous. [ engine turns over ] 424 00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:50,900 I was nonchalant. 425 00:17:50,902 --> 00:17:52,035 [ tires screech ] I was... 426 00:17:52,037 --> 00:17:53,503 [ crash ] 427 00:17:53,505 --> 00:17:54,938 An idiot! 428 00:17:56,709 --> 00:17:58,575 Suddenly, my goodwill ebbed. 429 00:17:58,577 --> 00:18:00,544 Now look what you made me do! 430 00:18:00,546 --> 00:18:02,946 Hey!We weren't driving. 431 00:18:02,948 --> 00:18:04,981 And I no longer felt generous. 432 00:18:04,983 --> 00:18:07,050 No!I was driving. 433 00:18:07,052 --> 00:18:08,651 And you know why? 434 00:18:08,653 --> 00:18:10,787 I felt rage. 435 00:18:10,789 --> 00:18:12,889 Because I'm crazy! 436 00:18:12,891 --> 00:18:15,558 I knew the Rolling Stones would never show up! 437 00:18:17,329 --> 00:18:18,428 [ Hubcap rattles ] 438 00:18:18,430 --> 00:18:20,330 I was really mad. 439 00:18:20,332 --> 00:18:22,533 And my foot hurt a lot. 440 00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:35,079 On the way home, 441 00:18:35,081 --> 00:18:37,448 Everyone was feeling pretty rotten, 442 00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:41,452 Lost in their own thoughts about missed opportunities. 443 00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:44,421 Me? I just had one thought. 444 00:18:44,423 --> 00:18:47,457 While the rest of the world would go on to college, 445 00:18:47,459 --> 00:18:53,030 Have careers, jobs, families, a life of their own... 446 00:18:53,032 --> 00:18:57,133 I would be spending the rest of the '70s... 447 00:18:57,135 --> 00:18:58,902 Grounded. 448 00:19:03,609 --> 00:19:06,443 [ sighs ] 449 00:19:06,445 --> 00:19:10,047 Face it... I was a young man without a future. 450 00:19:12,551 --> 00:19:16,853 And not only that, I'd even forgotten the milk. 451 00:19:16,855 --> 00:19:20,390 [ car horn plays "Dixie" ] 452 00:19:21,860 --> 00:19:23,293 [ Keys clatter ] 453 00:19:23,295 --> 00:19:26,630 My fate hung on my Dad's rear end. 454 00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:32,569 And as soon as he saw it, no story, no tale, 455 00:19:32,571 --> 00:19:35,439 No ocean of logic was going to help. 456 00:19:35,441 --> 00:19:38,308 Nothing would save me now. 457 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,582 Whoa! [ Hubcap rattles ] 458 00:19:44,584 --> 00:19:47,284 Except... 459 00:19:47,286 --> 00:19:49,419 Is everybody okay? 460 00:19:49,421 --> 00:19:52,422 Holy cow! 461 00:19:52,424 --> 00:19:55,025 [ Dog barking in distance ] 462 00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:56,593 I couldn't believe it. 463 00:19:56,595 --> 00:19:59,162 It was nothing but a mass of broken metal 464 00:19:59,164 --> 00:20:00,431 And busted bolts. 465 00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:02,699 Boy, I did it this time. 466 00:20:02,701 --> 00:20:05,335 Guess I'm just gonna have to learn to stop spinnin' yarns 467 00:20:05,337 --> 00:20:07,938 When I'm supposed to be applying brake. 468 00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,473 Yeah. 469 00:20:09,475 --> 00:20:15,111 In one clumsy move, the cowboy had given me back my life. 470 00:20:15,113 --> 00:20:19,016 I bet she's... Your pride and joy, too. 471 00:20:19,018 --> 00:20:20,617 Yeah. 472 00:20:20,619 --> 00:20:24,788 And, of course, there was only one appropriate thing to say. 473 00:20:24,790 --> 00:20:26,056 Sorry, Dad. 474 00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:26,923 Yeah. 475 00:20:26,925 --> 00:20:28,358 I'll tell ya what. 476 00:20:28,360 --> 00:20:30,928 I'm gonna make this up to ya, western-style. 477 00:20:30,930 --> 00:20:32,096 Our place up north 478 00:20:32,098 --> 00:20:34,965 Is in sorrowful need of furnishin' right now. 479 00:20:34,967 --> 00:20:38,601 And we'll take all the furniture you can make. 480 00:20:38,603 --> 00:20:40,737 Uh... 481 00:20:40,739 --> 00:20:42,739 What's a little bumper between friends, huh? 482 00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:43,740 [ Chuckles ] 483 00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,042 And just like that... 484 00:20:45,044 --> 00:20:47,244 I'm glad you feel that way about it. 485 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:48,845 Ah, sure. 486 00:20:48,847 --> 00:20:51,515 Now, about that furniture... 487 00:20:51,517 --> 00:20:54,384 My father's heartache turned into profit. 488 00:20:54,386 --> 00:20:58,489 But the truth was, it wasn't all this guy's fault. 489 00:20:58,491 --> 00:21:01,658 And somehow I couldn't help but feel a little guilty. 490 00:21:01,660 --> 00:21:04,761 You know, I feel a little guilty. 491 00:21:04,763 --> 00:21:07,031 [ Chuckles softly ] 492 00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:08,798 Why? 493 00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,134 Well, it's just that 494 00:21:10,136 --> 00:21:13,670 I know that some of that damage was already there. 495 00:21:13,672 --> 00:21:16,240 Uh-oh. 496 00:21:16,242 --> 00:21:18,142 You do? 497 00:21:18,144 --> 00:21:20,644 Yeah. 498 00:21:20,646 --> 00:21:24,781 I ran into the wall of the market yesterday. 499 00:21:24,783 --> 00:21:26,517 And that's when I realized 500 00:21:26,519 --> 00:21:30,487 There's all kinds of logic in this world. 501 00:21:30,489 --> 00:21:33,323 Why didn't you say anything? 502 00:21:33,325 --> 00:21:34,458 I don't know. 503 00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:38,495 I...Guess I just thought nobody would notice. 504 00:21:38,497 --> 00:21:41,731 Norma, we're fixin' to leave now. 505 00:21:41,733 --> 00:21:45,302 We had a wonderful time, Betty Lynn. 506 00:21:45,304 --> 00:21:48,638 And a lot of it doesn't make any sense. 507 00:21:51,476 --> 00:21:55,245 That night, moved by the forces of teen logic, 508 00:21:55,247 --> 00:21:59,182 I'd stolen my Dad's car, had a run-in with the police, 509 00:21:59,184 --> 00:22:03,053 A fight with my friends, and an accident. 510 00:22:03,055 --> 00:22:06,923 All in all, it was a great evening. 511 00:22:09,294 --> 00:22:12,395 Even if there were no Rolling Stones. 512 00:22:13,331 --> 00:22:15,632 [ feedback ] 513 00:22:15,634 --> 00:22:17,401 Man: [ British accent ] hey, Joe? 514 00:22:17,403 --> 00:22:19,403 Could I get some more volume? 515 00:22:19,405 --> 00:22:23,440 [ The Rolling Stones' "Brown Sugar" plays ] 516 00:22:23,490 --> 00:22:28,040 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 37511

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