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1
00:00:01,200 --> 00:00:04,700
Middleman HQ.
6:16 PM
2
00:02:30,900 --> 00:02:31,865
I'm not gonna lie to you,
3
00:02:31,900 --> 00:02:36,200
some of them are subbing for boyfriends
who stand up their dates for three hours.
4
00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:40,800
Grayscale dot matrix relationship
voodoo... nice.
5
00:02:41,700 --> 00:02:44,065
So, you want a cold pocket?
6
00:02:44,100 --> 00:02:46,350
Oh, for the love of...You cooked, too?
7
00:02:46,385 --> 00:02:48,600
Hot Pockets are the American empanada.
8
00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:52,700
So, can we start the groveling apology part
of the evening now?
9
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:58,500
Tyler, you told me that you loved
that I had a job I was good at.
10
00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:02,200
And I'd be a pretty awful girlfriend
if I didn't feel the same way about you, right?
11
00:03:03,700 --> 00:03:06,400
- I brought a bribe.
- Fork it over.
12
00:03:08,300 --> 00:03:11,200
Wow. It's a tennis bracelet.
13
00:03:11,300 --> 00:03:13,300
A diamond tennis bracelet.
14
00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:16,500
You can stay your inner Lacey.
The diamonds are lab grown.
15
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:19,200
Completely conflict-free.
16
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:23,000
Thank you, Tyler. I guess I'll go
take a tennis lesson or two.
17
00:03:23,100 --> 00:03:24,600
Look, I know, it's not you.
18
00:03:25,100 --> 00:03:27,800
Maybe I wasted too much of my childhood
in Panama
19
00:03:27,835 --> 00:03:29,665
watching badly-dubbed reruns of Dallas.
20
00:03:29,700 --> 00:03:31,900
Well, who didn't want to know
quién le disparó a J.R.?
21
00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:37,400
But seriously, I have always fantasized
about being able to buy my lady diamonds.
22
00:03:37,700 --> 00:03:39,200
I hope you like it.
23
00:03:39,700 --> 00:03:42,000
Seeing as how it's completely your fault
I got it for you.
24
00:03:42,035 --> 00:03:44,800
Because I kinda love you, Wendy Watson.
25
00:03:44,835 --> 00:03:46,000
Really?
26
00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:48,000
You kinda love me?
27
00:03:48,300 --> 00:03:50,700
That was an unfortunate turn of phrase.
28
00:03:50,735 --> 00:03:53,800
I meant to say I love you.
29
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:57,200
Well, in that case, I kinda love you too,
Tyler Ford.
30
00:04:04,100 --> 00:04:06,200
Just this one call, then the watch
and the Bluetooth...
31
00:04:06,235 --> 00:04:08,300
Taking a nap in the freezer.??
32
00:04:13,100 --> 00:04:14,865
Dubbie, it is I, the Middleman.
33
00:04:14,900 --> 00:04:18,700
Really? Calling me on the Middlewatch
that only we have?
34
00:04:19,100 --> 00:04:21,100
I was thinking, mirrors.
35
00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:25,400
What if he's creating some sort of
massive infinity mirror to reflect,
36
00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:28,900
and in doing so, trap all light
and mankind inside?
37
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,800
Uh, boss, can you hang on a sec?
38
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:34,700
Gotta go clean my nose off
this bloody grindstone.
39
00:04:34,735 --> 00:04:36,600
Oh, poop.
40
00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:38,800
Enjoy your date, Dubbie.
41
00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:43,050
- Wendy...
- Oh, no. I know that look.
42
00:04:43,085 --> 00:04:45,000
I'm usually the one giving that look.
43
00:04:45,100 --> 00:04:47,100
I'm so sorry. That was Manservant Neville.
44
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:51,200
Apparently there's a crisis with
our One uMaster Per Child Initiative.
45
00:04:51,300 --> 00:04:54,700
It involves train routes and an angry
Malaysian regional governor.
46
00:04:54,735 --> 00:04:56,265
My boss is sending someone to pick me up.
47
00:04:56,300 --> 00:04:59,100
This is sucktacular.
They're downtown, right?
48
00:04:59,500 --> 00:05:03,800
At least we have a few minutes to do this.
49
00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:07,700
And this.
50
00:05:08,900 --> 00:05:10,400
I don't know about that.
51
00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:13,600
But we may have some time to do this.
52
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:19,200
What the hell is that?
53
00:05:19,300 --> 00:05:21,200
Oh, man.
54
00:05:22,300 --> 00:05:23,900
Oh, it's Manservant Neville.
55
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:26,700
Your boss? You've got to be kidding me.
56
00:05:26,735 --> 00:05:29,200
Tyler, hurry!
57
00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:31,000
We're landing on the roof.
58
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:33,400
I'll call you tomorrow.
59
00:05:35,900 --> 00:05:40,000
www.1000fr.com presents
60
00:05:42,100 --> 00:05:47,100
Sync:FRS@Ȭ
61
00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:54,600
Middleman S01 E12
62
00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:58,400
The illegal sublet Wendy shares with another
young, photogenic,and self-respecting artist.
63
00:05:58,435 --> 00:06:00,700
Oh, my God. Are you crying?
64
00:06:01,100 --> 00:06:04,000
No... just a little.
65
00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:07,400
And what did you say?
66
00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,800
I said, "I kinda love you, too."
67
00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:13,100
At least I think I did.
68
00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:17,200
Pretty hard to hear over the thunderous din
of rotating airfoils.
69
00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,200
Come on, Dub-Dub.
70
00:06:19,300 --> 00:06:23,000
I know last night may have been a different
kind of whirlwind of excitement,
71
00:06:23,035 --> 00:06:24,065
but these things happen.
72
00:06:24,100 --> 00:06:28,100
Really? How many dates have you had unfold
like the second act ofMiss Saigon?
73
00:06:28,135 --> 00:06:29,200
You're in love!
74
00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:32,000
You should be dancing and singing,
75
00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:34,800
with little animated mice running
up your hand.
76
00:06:34,900 --> 00:06:36,800
Well, what if Fatboy changes him?
77
00:06:37,100 --> 00:06:41,400
He used to be a musician. What if he
turns into Tennis Bracelet Guy full time?
78
00:06:41,500 --> 00:06:43,300
What if he starts calling people "Bubby"
79
00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:46,900
and has some assistant named Ingrid call
and cancel our anniversary plans
80
00:06:46,935 --> 00:06:49,965
because he's detained in Papua,
New Guinea with Manservant Neville
81
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:54,200
because he's been rolling out the uMaster
to a forward-thinking cannibal tribe.
82
00:06:54,300 --> 00:06:56,300
- Not seeing it.
- It could happen.
83
00:06:57,100 --> 00:06:59,800
I went through the same thing
when you started your job.
84
00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:04,400
Ask Noser. And look, you're still
the same old Dub-Dub.
85
00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:08,200
I just had to be flexible and manage
my expectations.
86
00:07:08,235 --> 00:07:10,700
Ew! What's that supposed to mean?
87
00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:14,500
It means I've taken a few eggs out
of my Wendy basket.
88
00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:17,065
I make back-up plans.
89
00:07:17,100 --> 00:07:19,900
Yet, our Wonder Twin powers
are still intact.
90
00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:22,600
I don't know.
91
00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:26,800
I can't shake the feeling that I'm gonna kiss
Matt Damon in The Bourne Identitygood night
92
00:07:26,835 --> 00:07:29,100
and wake up to Matt Damon inThe Good Shepherd.
93
00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:31,600
Didn't his girlfriend die in
The Bourne Supremacy?
94
00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:33,600
Yeah, but he really loved her.
95
00:07:35,100 --> 00:07:37,500
And Tyler really loves you.
96
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:40,800
It's his circumstances that have changed,
not who he is.
97
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,100
Shoot.
98
00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:46,100
- I gotta...
- Go to work.
99
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,800
- I get it.
- Just circumstances, right?
100
00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:55,600
Our near maniac's managed to strike again,
this time at a manufacturer of merriment.
101
00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:58,800
Who steals a beryllium sphere
and an oscillation overthruster
102
00:07:58,835 --> 00:07:59,965
then hits a toy factory?
103
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:03,600
Today we're grief counselors with
the United States Police Force.
104
00:08:03,635 --> 00:08:06,300
You're Officer Russell,
I'm officer Van Cleef.
105
00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:08,300
Oh. I gotta grab this.
106
00:08:09,900 --> 00:08:10,700
Hey.
107
00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:13,100
Look, about last night, I...
108
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,065
I'm just sorry, that's all.
109
00:08:16,100 --> 00:08:18,800
- I called to say I'm sorry.
- Tyler, I get it.
110
00:08:18,900 --> 00:08:21,665
You can't exactly control all
the circumstances of your job.
111
00:08:21,700 --> 00:08:25,100
Yeah, I know, but I don't want you to
think I'm turning into Tennis Bracelet Guy.
112
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:26,400
Tennis Bracelet Guy?
113
00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:28,965
??You know, the guy who throws
fancy baubles at his girl
114
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:31,400
to make up for the fact that he's not
even in the relationship.
115
00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:32,365
Keep going like we are,
116
00:08:32,400 --> 00:08:35,200
pretty soon you'd run through
all the racquet sport-based jewelry.
117
00:08:35,300 --> 00:08:37,300
I meant the things I said last night, Wendy.
118
00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:39,100
So did I.
119
00:08:39,900 --> 00:08:42,400
And, hey, it's not like I have
the world's least demanding job, either.
120
00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:46,400
So, what do you say that you and I set aside
a block of Wendy and Tyler time
121
00:08:46,435 --> 00:08:48,500
that cannot be touched, like tonight?
122
00:08:48,900 --> 00:08:50,665
And if Manservant Neville calls,
123
00:08:50,700 --> 00:08:53,965
I will tell him that he can find himself
a new assistant.
124
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:57,400
And what do you say you and I pick up
right before I Airwolf'ed off the roof?
125
00:08:57,435 --> 00:09:00,000
I'd say tonight sounds... great.
126
00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:03,700
Um... it's gonna have to be tomorrow night.
127
00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:07,300
- I love you, Wendy Watson.
- And I'm sitting next to my boss.
128
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:14,300
That's not gonna give me J- Horror nightmares
for the rest of my life.
129
00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:16,200
Who steals baby eyes?
130
00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:19,600
She was so sweet. Now she's blind.
131
00:09:19,900 --> 00:09:21,900
- They're all blind.
- Mama, Mama.
132
00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:23,400
I don't get it.
133
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:28,200
I work hard. I support a wife, an ex-wife.
I have two ingrate kids.
134
00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:31,800
I went green before Ed Begley,
Jr. made it cool.
135
00:09:32,300 --> 00:09:37,200
Why can't I cut a break? What about me?
136
00:09:40,700 --> 00:09:44,800
Sir, I realize you're in
a precarious emotional state,
137
00:09:44,835 --> 00:09:48,900
Sometimes it helps with grief
to talk through the trauma.
138
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,200
Now, I understand you found a mirror?
139
00:09:54,500 --> 00:09:55,800
Looks like a river.
140
00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:02,700
So, he steals 100,000 toy eyeballs
and leaves this.
141
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:08,900
A man, a light bulb and a river.
142
00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:11,400
Maybe his plan is to confuse
the hell out of us.
143
00:10:11,500 --> 00:10:12,700
A plan?
144
00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:17,400
Dubbie, a man, a plan! Not a river,
but a canal.
145
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:19,965
A man, a plan, a canal... Panama.
146
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:23,900
????The perfect palindrome. Same phrase
forward, same phrase backwards.
147
00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,300
Who leaves a palindrome?
148
00:10:25,900 --> 00:10:27,700
Typical super-villain horse feathers.
149
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:29,600
Can't wait to hear this guy's monologue.
150
00:10:29,900 --> 00:10:33,900
"I'm The Palindrome. Feel my power.
Power my feel. Palindrome the am I."
151
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:36,500
Peter Piping weirdoes.
152
00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:40,000
But why the eyes this time?
153
00:10:40,100 --> 00:10:42,400
They don't seem all that nefarious
on their own.
154
00:10:43,300 --> 00:10:46,500
Wait a minute. Hey, Sob Story.
155
00:10:46,900 --> 00:10:50,500
These eyes, you wouldn't happen to know if
they're made out of something special, would you?
156
00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:51,900
Like I said, I'm green.
157
00:10:52,100 --> 00:10:56,100
The eyes are polydichloric euthimal.
Non-toxic, biodegradable, safe...
158
00:10:56,135 --> 00:10:59,800
Eyes Without a Face!
Polydichloric euthimal? You fool!
159
00:10:59,900 --> 00:11:01,400
Do you have any idea what you've done?
160
00:11:01,500 --> 00:11:03,600
What kind of grief counselors are you?
161
00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:06,200
Ida, run the following through OCD.
162
00:11:06,300 --> 00:11:08,900
Our villain, shall we call him
The Palindrome,
163
00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:11,565
has a beryllium sphere,
an oscillation overthruster
164
00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:14,300
and now a near limitless supply
of polydichloric euthimal.
165
00:11:14,335 --> 00:11:16,400
Got it. Uh-oh.
166
00:11:16,700 --> 00:11:18,700
OCD's talking and it's talking crazy.
167
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:20,200
Then it's as I feared.
168
00:11:20,300 --> 00:11:24,100
Throw in a sufficient power source and
The Palindrome will have everything to activate...
169
00:11:24,135 --> 00:11:25,700
A Quantum Singularity Machine.
170
00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:29,500
Sorry I popped my cork back there, but
this is a sack full of eels and coat hangers.
171
00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:32,000
The Palindrome has the power
to open a mini black hole.
172
00:11:32,300 --> 00:11:34,500
Like the kind that eats socks in the dryer?
173
00:11:34,700 --> 00:11:39,000
The kind connecting different worlds
and parallel dimensions.
174
00:11:39,100 --> 00:11:41,200
My little pony.
175
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:44,800
The Palindrome lifts up the space-time
continuum's petticoats
176
00:11:44,835 --> 00:11:46,700
we'll all be trussed up but good.
177
00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:52,300
Ida, jump on the HEYDAR and search
for power spikes exceeding 1.012 gigawatts.
178
00:11:52,500 --> 00:11:54,500
What is this, my first school play?
179
00:11:54,535 --> 00:11:56,400
I already got an address.
180
00:12:05,500 --> 00:12:07,500
Dubbie, it's the fourth mirror.
181
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:11,465
That's not even Panama. that's just a hat.
182
00:12:11,500 --> 00:12:14,400
I swear, even if he's not opening
a Quantum Singularity,
183
00:12:14,435 --> 00:12:16,600
I'm still smoking this guy on principle.
184
00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:18,900
There he is.
185
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:23,900
House of Pancakes.
186
00:12:24,100 --> 00:12:26,500
The Quantum Singularity Machine's powering up.
187
00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:28,300
Can't we just shoot him?
188
00:12:28,700 --> 00:12:30,100
You smell that?
189
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:33,000
Ionized polydichloric euthimal gas.
190
00:12:33,400 --> 00:12:36,500
We discharge our weapons,
the entire place goes Vesuvius.
191
00:12:36,700 --> 00:12:38,200
- Right.
- All right.
192
00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:41,000
I confront him, get him off
on the monologue, you go around...
193
00:12:41,035 --> 00:12:42,600
Switch off the machine
while he's distracted?
194
00:12:42,700 --> 00:12:44,800
Dang skippy. Break.
195
00:12:45,500 --> 00:12:49,100
So, you thought you'd get away with it.
I get it.
196
00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:52,400
You shoot, I die. I shoot, you die.
197
00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:54,600
I'm willing to die, are you?
198
00:12:54,700 --> 00:12:58,100
So, uh, Mr. Palindrome,
199
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:00,200
maybe you'd like to tell me
why you're doing this?
200
00:13:00,235 --> 00:13:02,000
- No.
- Really?
201
00:13:02,300 --> 00:13:05,600
No twisted evil plan you'd like
to get off your chest?
202
00:13:06,100 --> 00:13:08,600
No tale of childhood humiliation you
need to share
203
00:13:08,635 --> 00:13:11,065
in order to elucidate the path
of pure darkness
204
00:13:11,100 --> 00:13:14,400
that brought us to this inevitable
Manichaean showdown?
205
00:13:14,500 --> 00:13:15,665
Shut up!
206
00:13:15,700 --> 00:13:16,865
It doesn't make sense.
207
00:13:16,900 --> 00:13:19,900
Why set an elaborate clue trail if you
have nothing to say when you're found?
208
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:36,200
Dubbie, look out!
209
00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:44,565
Where am I?
210
00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:48,100
How long have I been out?
211
00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:01,000
Boss? Boss! It's me. I don't know
if you can hear me,
212
00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:04,700
but I got sucked in and I'm in hot pursuit
of Johnny Won't Monologue.
213
00:14:04,735 --> 00:14:08,000
So, if you're here, now would be
a good time to say something.
214
00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:25,200
The world is one family.
215
00:14:25,300 --> 00:14:29,465
We are all sons and daughters,
brothers and sisters.
216
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:35,900
The people united, obedient and loyal
to the aims of society that works.
217
00:14:36,900 --> 00:14:38,265
I believe in you, my children,
218
00:14:38,300 --> 00:14:42,100
and all I ask in return is
that you believe in me.
219
00:14:42,300 --> 00:14:47,500
As your father, your architect,
your first among equals.
220
00:14:47,800 --> 00:14:51,300
Remember, Manservant Neville serves you.
221
00:14:51,700 --> 00:14:54,000
The world is one family.
222
00:14:54,300 --> 00:14:58,300
We are all sons and daughters,
brothers and sisters,
223
00:14:58,500 --> 00:14:59,765
- Sorry.
- united.
224
00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:01,300
No cutting. End of the line.
225
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:04,800
- Line? Line for what?
- For your daily spray of soup, maggot.
226
00:15:04,835 --> 00:15:06,700
I don't want a spray of soup.
227
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:09,400
- Can I have her soup?
- Shut up, worm.
228
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:12,000
Got a fighter, huh?
229
00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:14,500
Where's your i.d.? You know the penalty.
230
00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:17,100
Your Fatboy i.d. Where is it?
231
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,500
Sound the alarm. We've got an unidentified!
232
00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:24,100
Shoot to kill!
233
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:28,000
I believe in you, my children.
234
00:15:28,035 --> 00:15:29,700
All I ask in return...
235
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:31,500
Second level clear.
236
00:15:31,900 --> 00:15:33,500
Two-ten status update.
237
00:15:39,300 --> 00:15:41,200
I think I heard something.
238
00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:44,200
Bravo Team, any visual confirmation
on unidentified?
239
00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:46,900
Assemble for the Pledge!
240
00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:50,400
Assemble for the Pledge!
241
00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:53,365
Hey, boss? I don't know if you're getting this,
242
00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:58,300
but remember when you said the Singularity
might lead to a parallel universe?
243
00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,600
Well, it did.
244
00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:02,065
I'm pretty much trapped...
245
00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:06,100
...in Alan Parker's 1982 theatrical
film version of The Wall.
246
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:09,365
One corporation above all men...
247
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:13,500
Finding a place to hide from the roaming
death squads is a top priority.
248
00:16:14,300 --> 00:16:18,900
Oh, and also, I want a raise.
249
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,100
An evil hallway in an evil parallel universe.
11:52 AM
250
00:16:23,900 --> 00:16:25,200
Who's the man?
251
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:27,000
Noser. Thank god.
252
00:16:27,100 --> 00:16:29,100
I said, "Who's the man!"
253
00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,800
Um... that would be Shaft?
254
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,800
- What kind of man?
- Uh...complicated man?
255
00:16:34,835 --> 00:16:36,000
Who understands him?
256
00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:38,800
- Noser, please.
- Answer me now!
257
00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,300
No one but his woman.
258
00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:44,600
Right on. You can go in.
259
00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:48,700
An evil loft in an evil parallel universe.
Exactly two seconds later.
260
00:16:50,900 --> 00:16:55,000
Of course. Why wouldn't my living room
be an exotic dancer lounge?
261
00:16:55,035 --> 00:16:56,400
Hasenpfeffer?
262
00:16:56,500 --> 00:16:58,600
- Excuse me?
- Rabbit stew.
263
00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:01,900
Lacey's secret recipe. Best lunch
buffet in town.
264
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,300
Joe.
265
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:06,500
Joe 90, Esquire. Attorney to Fatboy.
266
00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:09,300
Yeah, Bubby, I've got a high security clearance.
267
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:11,700
You don't know me, do you?
268
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:17,165
Feisty. Let's go up to the champagne room,
see if we can change that.
269
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:21,500
Wendy Watson! I always knew someday
you'd come walking back through my door.
270
00:17:21,700 --> 00:17:22,700
Lacey!
271
00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:27,000
That's for my first year in Fatboy
darning camp!
272
00:17:27,035 --> 00:17:28,500
- Darning camp?
- Yeah.
273
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:30,500
Storm trooper socks and underwear?
274
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:32,800
And this is for my second year!
275
00:17:33,100 --> 00:17:35,300
- God, stop, wait.
- Cat fight!
276
00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:37,800
- You abandoned me.
- No, I would never.
277
00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:39,400
Then what do you call it?
278
00:17:39,900 --> 00:17:40,965
Freshman year of art school,
279
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:43,900
Fatboy takes over and turns it
into management traing school.
280
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,300
That's horrible.
281
00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:46,600
Back-stabbing
282
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:49,300
Look, just calm down.
283
00:17:49,800 --> 00:17:53,700
You were supposed to meet me at the protest
rally, but you sold me out, Dub-Dub.
284
00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:57,000
Took that job over at Fatboy
and got me arrested.
285
00:17:58,300 --> 00:17:59,900
Now look at me.
286
00:18:00,300 --> 00:18:02,000
Noser, throw her out!
287
00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:05,200
Lacey, I swear, that wasn't me.
288
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:08,500
I haven't seen your face in five years,
Wendy Watson.
289
00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:10,300
And I never need to see it again!
290
00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:13,700
Let me go, Noser. I know the way out.
291
00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:18,100
Fatboy! Man, I hate these guys.
292
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:20,200
- Shoot to kill.
- Die, pigs!
293
00:18:29,700 --> 00:18:32,200
Fatboy can't know I was here.
They'll pull my clearance.
294
00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:35,200
- Then help me.
- An unidentified? You kidding?
295
00:18:35,700 --> 00:18:37,600
Sayonara,Bubby.
296
00:18:38,300 --> 00:18:40,100
There she is. Get her!
297
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,300
Come with me if you want to live.
298
00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:48,900
- Medic! Get a medic!
- Weapon fire.
299
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:57,300
Thanks, man. I flashed all the way
to myquincea era before you swooped in.
300
00:18:57,500 --> 00:19:00,000
I heard an unidentified was in danger
in Theta Sector and...
301
00:19:00,035 --> 00:19:01,000
Pip!
302
00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:05,300
You know me? Forgive me. I take great care
to know all my parishioners.
303
00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:08,800
Wait. You're...
304
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:12,800
You're telling me that you're Father Pip?
305
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,100
A man of the cloth?
306
00:19:15,300 --> 00:19:16,500
Celibate?
307
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:18,500
I can get you out of the city, my child.
308
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:20,400
Safe from Fatboy.
309
00:19:20,500 --> 00:19:23,700
Of course, there are risks.
We both might not make it.
310
00:19:23,735 --> 00:19:28,000
You're telling me that you, Pip,
311
00:19:28,300 --> 00:19:32,400
a priest, are willing to risk your life
for me?
312
00:19:33,700 --> 00:19:35,600
We're all children of the Lord.
313
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,500
I'm in the mirror universe.
314
00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:40,600
I'm sorry? The mirror universe?
315
00:19:41,100 --> 00:19:45,165
The parallel universe, where everyone
who's good is evil and evil is good.
316
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:48,900
It's like that episode ofStar Trek where
Spock had a goatee and Chekhov tried to...
317
00:19:48,935 --> 00:19:50,000
Star Trek?
318
00:19:50,300 --> 00:19:54,300
You mean the sci-fi series from the '60s
starring the great George Takei?
319
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,800
It is an evil universe.
320
00:19:57,500 --> 00:19:59,800
Look, I need you to take me to see someone.
321
00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:05,000
There's a man in my world, someone so good,
someone so "aw shucks" wholesome
322
00:20:05,035 --> 00:20:07,200
that I just gotta believe he's
still the same man here.
323
00:20:07,500 --> 00:20:11,500
'Cause if he's not I might as well just
take the fetal position and pop in a thumb.
324
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:14,200
Where can I find this balm in Gilead?
325
00:20:16,100 --> 00:20:17,165
The regular universe.Middleman HQ.
12:21 PM
326
00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:21,500
How many times are you gonna watch
that real-time situation recording archive?
327
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:24,600
As many as it takes to understand
what happened while I was knocked out
328
00:20:24,900 --> 00:20:26,700
and where Wendy went.
329
00:20:28,100 --> 00:20:30,800
Where are you? What's with your suit?
330
00:20:31,300 --> 00:20:33,500
Where's your beard?
331
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:37,700
The Palindrome goes into the Singularity
wearing a black suit and a goatee.
332
00:20:37,735 --> 00:20:40,700
And he exits the Singularity
in a light colored suit,
333
00:20:40,900 --> 00:20:42,600
sansfacial hair.
334
00:20:42,700 --> 00:20:44,900
Well, either he shaved and changed,
335
00:20:45,300 --> 00:20:48,465
of that's The Palindrome from
a parallel universe.
336
00:20:48,500 --> 00:20:51,800
Wherever that man is, he has
a Quantum Singularity Machine.
337
00:20:52,300 --> 00:20:54,500
If anyone knows where Wendy is, it's he.
338
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:57,600
Come puppet blood, monkey fudge or terracotta,
339
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,300
I'm getting her back.
340
00:21:02,100 --> 00:21:06,600
Hey, state your business. And make it snappy.
I'm working on my tan lines.
341
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:09,265
Ida? You're Ida.
342
00:21:09,300 --> 00:21:13,300
Congratulations. That's officially the least
intelligent thing I've heard all day.
343
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:15,600
Oh, yeah. You're her, all right.
344
00:21:16,100 --> 00:21:18,900
OK, well, this is not gonna
make a lot of sense,
345
00:21:18,935 --> 00:21:21,700
but I went through this Quantum Singularity...
346
00:21:21,735 --> 00:21:23,300
You know, something just occurred to me.
347
00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:24,565
What's that?
348
00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:27,900
I don't give a baboon's butt
about your complicated back story.
349
00:21:28,100 --> 00:21:31,100
Here's how it works. If you got the cash,
we've got the action.
350
00:21:31,300 --> 00:21:33,300
Save the rest of it for your shrink.
351
00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:40,600
What? Did your brain separate
from your body in the Singularity?
352
00:21:40,700 --> 00:21:42,100
Get a move on!
353
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,700
Hey. I found this one crying in the lobby.
354
00:21:48,900 --> 00:21:52,300
I'll be over here exalting in the fact
I can't get cancer.
355
00:21:59,800 --> 00:22:02,200
Shut it before I throw a hook in it.
356
00:22:02,235 --> 00:22:04,600
They're real and they're spectacular.
357
00:22:11,700 --> 00:22:13,900
Nice bike.
358
00:22:14,700 --> 00:22:18,400
Hello? Earth to man in chaps.
359
00:22:21,100 --> 00:22:25,000
It's not a bike. It's the Middlehog.
360
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:27,600
- Oh.
- Let me guess.
361
00:22:28,700 --> 00:22:32,100
You're a Middleman-in-training
from a parallel universe.
362
00:22:32,700 --> 00:22:34,865
You were chasing an A-number one nut job
363
00:22:34,900 --> 00:22:38,000
when he opened up a Quantum Singularity to this world,
364
00:22:38,100 --> 00:22:40,600
inadvertently pulling you through with him.
365
00:22:41,900 --> 00:22:45,700
Now little Dorothy just wants to get back home.
366
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:46,800
How'd you guess?
367
00:22:47,100 --> 00:22:49,700
Classic gun strapped to
that pretty leg of yours.
368
00:22:50,300 --> 00:22:52,700
Gives you away immediately
as a Middle-trainee.
369
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:54,965
I meant the Quantum Singularity part.
370
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:59,200
The HEYDAR chimed that there was a rip
in space time near the soup lines.
371
00:22:59,700 --> 00:23:01,400
And you didn't investigate?
372
00:23:02,100 --> 00:23:04,000
It's none of my business.
373
00:23:04,100 --> 00:23:06,800
- It is now.
- Sorry.
374
00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:11,900
Mirror sidekick or not,
I'm just The Middleman.
375
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:14,800
I don't lift a finger till you give me
my chubbies.
376
00:23:14,835 --> 00:23:15,900
Excuse me?
377
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:19,600
Chubbies. Oinkers. Piggies.
378
00:23:20,300 --> 00:23:23,900
- Cash, money.
- Oh. Money, I have.
379
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:30,400
right!
380
00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:32,700
Guess your world's ain't down
with the sickness.
381
00:23:32,900 --> 00:23:35,100
Meet Mr. Chubby.
382
00:23:35,500 --> 00:23:38,065
Ever since Fatboy won the Battle of D.C.,
383
00:23:38,100 --> 00:23:41,200
these little pink freaks have served
as official currency.
384
00:23:41,700 --> 00:23:44,600
So, unless you got something else
to sell,
385
00:23:45,100 --> 00:23:46,565
Ida shows you the door.
386
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:48,500
How can you call yourself The Middleman?
387
00:23:49,100 --> 00:23:52,300
Charging people who need help?
You make me want to puke.
388
00:23:52,335 --> 00:23:54,600
Puke all you want, sidecar.
389
00:23:55,700 --> 00:23:58,565
This is the United States of Fatboy, baby.
390
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:02,300
Love it or hate it, everyone sings
for their supper.
391
00:24:02,700 --> 00:24:04,865
You can't pay, you're out of luck.
392
00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:08,400
Wow. Vanity really does cheapen the soul
and weaken the mind.
393
00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:14,100
Does this feed the greed?
394
00:24:17,700 --> 00:24:19,400
Nicely.
395
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:23,200
Ida, fire up the HEYDAR.
396
00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:27,000
Middlechick just bought herself a partner.
397
00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:32,000
I have an idea on the man in the real-time
situation recording archive.
398
00:24:32,300 --> 00:24:34,265
His name is Ivan Avi.
399
00:24:34,300 --> 00:24:38,400
His home address: 1997 Plissken Circle.
400
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,765
I hacked Fatboy Surveillance
and found an ID of the man
401
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:45,000
who left that power plant with
the Quantum Singularity Machine.
402
00:24:45,100 --> 00:24:50,300
His name is Ivan Avi. His home address
is 1997 Plissken Circle.
403
00:24:50,700 --> 00:24:52,700
Let's get to it.
404
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:58,600
Sir, you may want to freeze.
405
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:07,400
Grab ankle,.You'll never make me go back
to that horrible place!
406
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:10,100
- Put down the machine.
- Please, I just want my partner back.
407
00:25:12,500 --> 00:25:15,200
- Ah,
- Oh, phooey.
408
00:25:17,100 --> 00:25:19,865
I'm never going back again, never.
Not on my life!
409
00:25:19,900 --> 00:25:22,400
All I'm interested in is your
Quantum Singularity Machine.
410
00:25:22,500 --> 00:25:24,300
If I wanted to build another,
could it be done?
411
00:25:24,500 --> 00:25:27,100
I just want your Quantum Singularity Machine.
412
00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:28,865
Can I build one, or what?
413
00:25:28,900 --> 00:25:33,000
Sure, if you could get your hands on
a medical-grade sphere of beryllium
414
00:25:33,035 --> 00:25:36,500
and a one-of-a-kind oscillation overthruster.
415
00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:45,800
Maniacal laughter.
Didn't see that one coming.
416
00:25:45,835 --> 00:25:48,100
I'm a patient man, Mr. Avi,
if that's your name.
417
00:25:48,500 --> 00:25:51,500
But this old fishing line's reached
its breaking strain.
418
00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:54,600
My partner's trapped on the other side
of that Quantum Singularity
419
00:25:54,700 --> 00:25:56,300
and you're going to tell me how to get her.
420
00:25:56,400 --> 00:26:01,400
Hold on. Did you say someone's trapped
in my world? But that's horrible.
421
00:26:01,700 --> 00:26:05,300
I mean it. It was supposed to be
a one-for-one Ivan exchange.
422
00:26:05,335 --> 00:26:06,900
Exchange.
423
00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:08,465
Jimmy crack corn.
424
00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:11,800
See, our plan was sheer elegance
in its simplicity.
425
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:14,200
Save it. Just help me understand.
426
00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:17,300
I was born an orphan in a world much
like this,
427
00:26:17,335 --> 00:26:19,700
only as if reflected through a dark mirror.
428
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:21,565
That's why The Palindrome left those mirrors.
429
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:25,200
Oh no, that was my idea. I always
wanted to be an artist.
430
00:26:25,300 --> 00:26:27,900
But I was born into an evil world,
431
00:26:28,300 --> 00:26:31,900
skies choked with ammonia,
seas full of benzene,
432
00:26:31,935 --> 00:26:36,265
baby farms, random suffocations, bears.
433
00:26:36,300 --> 00:26:39,300
- Oh.
- All of it run by Fatboy Industries.
434
00:26:39,400 --> 00:26:43,300
Even as a boy, I knew I didn't belong.
And then I turned 13.
435
00:26:43,700 --> 00:26:46,500
During a freak limbo accident
at my Bar Mitzvah party,
436
00:26:46,535 --> 00:26:48,400
I severed my pineal gland.
437
00:26:48,700 --> 00:26:53,500
That's when I began having psychic visions
of a parallel world,
438
00:26:53,535 --> 00:26:59,200
with antitrust laws, lead-free toys,
non-aerosolized soup.
439
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:04,700
I soon realized I was seeing through
the eyes of my mirror-self,
440
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:07,865
a wicked boy equally trapped in your world
441
00:27:07,900 --> 00:27:11,000
who also lost his pineal gland
in a freak accident.
442
00:27:11,300 --> 00:27:13,700
And I can see which one of you
got the monologue gene.
443
00:27:13,900 --> 00:27:16,800
Over time we learned to communicate.
Pooling our talents,
444
00:27:17,100 --> 00:27:20,600
we each built a Quantum Singularity Machine
so we might switch places.
445
00:27:20,635 --> 00:27:23,700
That's all. I never meant
to involve your friend.
446
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:25,865
Your Quantum Singularity Machine.
447
00:27:25,900 --> 00:27:28,900
If it can't be rebuilt, can its effects
at least be replicated?
448
00:27:28,935 --> 00:27:30,665
Well, my mirror-universe self and I
449
00:27:30,700 --> 00:27:33,465
designed it to simulate the effect
of firing a phased polaron
450
00:27:33,500 --> 00:27:37,000
cannon at a black hole in outer space
from both universes simultaneously.
451
00:27:37,035 --> 00:27:37,900
Theoretically,
452
00:27:38,700 --> 00:27:42,750
if you and your partner were to stand
in the same place, at the same time,
453
00:27:42,785 --> 00:27:46,800
and fire a phased polaron cannon
at the exact same point in the sky...
454
00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:48,665
Sounds like we have a plan.
455
00:27:48,700 --> 00:27:52,800
But no, no, it won't work. Nobody,
and I mean nobody,
456
00:27:52,835 --> 00:27:54,600
has a phased polaron cannon.
457
00:27:54,700 --> 00:27:56,665
I do. In my weapons archive.
458
00:27:56,700 --> 00:27:59,100
But that's impossible. Niels Bohr
died while building it...
459
00:27:59,135 --> 00:28:00,700
In 1962.
460
00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:02,900
Ah, Bohr, he's anything but.
461
00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:05,400
You should see the Christmas card
he sent me last year.
462
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:06,900
What a gas.
463
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:11,800
Ida, I need coordinates for the nearest
black hole in our corner of the night sky.
464
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:15,600
If your universe truly mirrors mine,
465
00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:18,600
my counterpart should also
have a phased polaron cannon.
466
00:28:18,900 --> 00:28:22,100
Is there any way to get a message to my partner,
Wendy, through your twin?
467
00:28:22,135 --> 00:28:23,700
Of course, we're psychically linked.
468
00:28:23,735 --> 00:28:25,200
Good.
469
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:36,600
He's in this room. He's in this room
right now with your partner.
470
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:40,800
He's in pain.
471
00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:47,000
- That was me asking nicely.
- OK. That's enough. Stop it.
472
00:28:50,900 --> 00:28:54,100
Last time I tried that move on Sensei Ping
he plucked out my eye.
473
00:28:54,135 --> 00:28:56,000
HolyKill Bill: Volume 2.
474
00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:58,400
Sensei Ping put out your eye? Why?
475
00:28:58,435 --> 00:29:00,400
Maybe because he's a psychotic.
476
00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:03,800
- 'Course he got his at the dread pyramid of...
- Itzilichlitlichlitzl?
477
00:29:03,900 --> 00:29:05,800
- You didn't save him?
- Save him?
478
00:29:06,300 --> 00:29:08,600
I'm the one who dropped the dime
with the Luchadores.
479
00:29:09,100 --> 00:29:10,800
You're sick.
480
00:29:12,300 --> 00:29:15,465
I have a message for Dubbie.
481
00:29:15,500 --> 00:29:17,000
That's what my boss calls me.
What is it?
482
00:29:17,035 --> 00:29:19,100
He says, "Dubbie,
483
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:24,950
fire the phase polaron cannon
at coordinates ascension
484
00:29:24,985 --> 00:29:30,300
16 hours, 3 minutes, 32 seconds,
declination 9.483 degrees
485
00:29:30,335 --> 00:29:34,000
from the geographical center of the city
486
00:29:34,300 --> 00:29:36,750
at precisely 9:29pm tonight.
487
00:29:36,785 --> 00:29:39,165
Can you tell my boss I'm OK?
488
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:41,900
Oh, wait. There's more. Come closer.
489
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:50,800
OK. Now you're gonna let me go
or the girl dies.
490
00:29:54,100 --> 00:29:57,700
Ivan, Ivan, did Wendy get the message?
491
00:29:57,800 --> 00:30:00,000
I don't know.
492
00:30:00,700 --> 00:30:03,400
But my brother, he...He's dead.
493
00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:06,400
Did you lose a chunk of brain with that eye?
494
00:30:06,435 --> 00:30:07,900
It had to be done, sweetheart.
495
00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:11,500
You straight up murdered the one guy
who could communicate with my world.
496
00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:14,100
Same guy who had a gun to your throat.
497
00:30:14,135 --> 00:30:15,400
I could have handled it.
498
00:30:15,500 --> 00:30:17,700
I was trained by Sensei Ping, same as you!
499
00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:22,600
Look, if I have cause to squeeze a trigger,
I'm not gonna pull my punch.
500
00:30:22,635 --> 00:30:24,400
This isn't your world, Bubbles.
501
00:30:24,700 --> 00:30:28,200
I don't step out my door each morning into
a field of lilacs and candy canes.
502
00:30:28,235 --> 00:30:30,200
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it.
503
00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:34,200
This is New Jack City. Might makes right.
Blah, blah, blah.
504
00:30:34,700 --> 00:30:35,900
Well, look what it's gotten you.
505
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,750
Leather pants and a fake-bake robot.
506
00:30:38,785 --> 00:30:41,300
Hey, I'd use the sun if I could see it.
507
00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:44,000
Just get me the phased polaron cannon
and I'm gone.
508
00:30:44,035 --> 00:30:46,900
Trust me, I would, just to be rid
of your yap.
509
00:30:47,900 --> 00:30:52,000
But I sold it to Fatboy Industries three
years ago to pay the rent on this grease pit.
510
00:30:52,900 --> 00:30:55,250
Well, if you didn't have a problem
selling it to the enemy,
511
00:30:55,285 --> 00:30:57,692
you're not gonna have a problem
helping me steal it back.
512
00:30:57,727 --> 00:31:00,100
Why don't I save us the trouble
and just pull this pin, huh?
513
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:02,400
Whoa, cowboy. Her idea, not mine.
514
00:31:02,700 --> 00:31:06,000
My advice? Fatboy bombed out Delta Sector
last week.
515
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:07,865
Real estate should be mighty cheap.
516
00:31:07,900 --> 00:31:10,365
- You think I'm gonna stay here?
- Over suicide?
517
00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:13,600
- I have people counting on me.
- How can you hope your gambit's gonna work?
518
00:31:13,635 --> 00:31:15,900
I get to hope because I fight for it.
519
00:31:16,500 --> 00:31:18,800
Bet that sounded real pretty in your head.
520
00:31:18,900 --> 00:31:23,300
How can a man like you live in the same skin
and have the same brain as my boss?
521
00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:28,000
He wasn't always like this.
522
00:31:28,300 --> 00:31:30,300
He used to be a real Middleman.
523
00:31:30,700 --> 00:31:32,500
But then he died.
524
00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:34,400
Who?
525
00:31:40,300 --> 00:31:41,900
Chief. I'm surrounded by Fatboy agents.
526
00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:43,300
Tyler was the Middleboy?
527
00:31:43,335 --> 00:31:45,500
Why'd you leave?
528
00:31:46,500 --> 00:31:48,200
Chief?
529
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,465
Please. No!
530
00:31:52,500 --> 00:31:53,800
Never found the trigger man.
531
00:31:54,100 --> 00:31:56,300
The only clue was that red anodized ray gun.
532
00:31:56,500 --> 00:31:58,865
But if that phased polaron cannon's anywhere,
533
00:31:58,900 --> 00:32:02,100
it's in Manservant Neville's
private control room at Fatboy Command,
534
00:32:02,135 --> 00:32:03,600
leaving one question:
535
00:32:03,700 --> 00:32:05,500
how are you gonna get it?
536
00:32:09,700 --> 00:32:11,600
I need your help.
537
00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:15,700
So, let me get this straight.
538
00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:19,300
After five years, two of which I spent
learning more about jockey shorts
539
00:32:19,335 --> 00:32:21,300
than any woman has ever wanted or intended,
540
00:32:21,500 --> 00:32:24,300
you've come back wanting me to help you
break into Fatboy Command?
541
00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:27,700
I know how much you hate them.
This could be your chance for revenge.
542
00:32:28,100 --> 00:32:31,000
You've exactly ten seconds to throw
your into the street
543
00:32:31,035 --> 00:32:32,500
before Noser does it for you!
544
00:32:34,100 --> 00:32:36,265
Well, don't you want to hear my offer?
545
00:32:36,300 --> 00:32:39,600
- What could you possibly offer?
- Something I know I couldn't give you before.
546
00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:41,900
An apology.
547
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:44,000
I need you to listen.
548
00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:47,500
Because every time you look at me
I can see how much I hurt you.
549
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:51,400
And I'm sure I had my reasons. Everyone does.
550
00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:56,600
But I can't think of a single one that
justifies you being in that darning camp.
551
00:32:57,000 --> 00:32:59,800
And I wish I could take back all the pain
that I caused you.
552
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:03,400
All I can do is say I'm sorry.
I wish I'd been stronger.
553
00:33:04,500 --> 00:33:05,900
But I'm a different person now,
554
00:33:06,300 --> 00:33:09,900
and I can't imagine a universe
where I don't need your friendship.
555
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:12,200
There's no way we're breaking in, you know.
556
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:16,500
Fatboy Command's locked up tighter
than a public drinking fountain.
557
00:33:16,535 --> 00:33:18,900
Then it's a good thing you've got a man
on the inside.
558
00:33:27,300 --> 00:33:30,700
- Not enough Bunny for one day?
- What's with the thunderclouds, ladies?
559
00:33:30,900 --> 00:33:32,900
There's plenty of Joe to go around.
560
00:33:35,500 --> 00:33:37,800
And you have photographic evidence.
561
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:50,300
Oh, God. They're gonna put me in the beard.
562
00:33:50,800 --> 00:33:51,800
Beard?
563
00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:54,700
Standard Fatboy employee torture protocol.
564
00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:57,500
It always starts with the beard of bees.
565
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,300
Just keep it together and you'll have nothing
to worry about.
566
00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:03,500
- There any cameras in this place?
- No.
567
00:34:03,800 --> 00:34:06,600
Corporate policy. No cameras allowed
on Fatboy premises.
568
00:34:11,200 --> 00:34:13,400
That girl's out there without a Fatboy card.
569
00:34:13,700 --> 00:34:16,100
She won't get far if they haven't
got her already.
570
00:34:16,135 --> 00:34:18,500
- I don't care.
- You know, she reminds me of someone.
571
00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:21,000
- Someone else you didn't help.
- I don't care.
572
00:34:21,100 --> 00:34:23,000
She's going to storm that fortress alone.
573
00:34:23,100 --> 00:34:25,200
This is your chance. You can make good again.
574
00:34:25,300 --> 00:34:28,200
Hey, Ida, news flash coming up
on the wire.
575
00:34:28,235 --> 00:34:29,800
Oh, no. What is it?
576
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:31,800
I don't care.
577
00:34:31,835 --> 00:34:33,200
Then I quit.
578
00:34:33,500 --> 00:34:37,400
Even this obstructed bowel of a planet
doesn't deserve a Middleman like you.
579
00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:44,400
This is it. Manservant Neville's
private control room.
580
00:34:44,435 --> 00:34:46,100
Sorry. I don't have a card for this door.
581
00:34:56,300 --> 00:34:58,900
There's just something hinky
about that combination.
582
00:35:06,300 --> 00:35:10,100
Assault rifle, assault rifle,
futuristic metal thing.
583
00:35:10,135 --> 00:35:12,000
That must be the phased polaron cannon.
584
00:35:14,900 --> 00:35:18,300
OK, good. Let's split. This place
is giving me the Willy Wonkas.
585
00:35:20,700 --> 00:35:22,800
Uh, Lace?
586
00:35:22,900 --> 00:35:24,200
Oh, God.
587
00:35:24,700 --> 00:35:27,000
- What's behind me?
- Just stay calm.
588
00:35:27,035 --> 00:35:29,600
And don't turn around.
589
00:35:30,700 --> 00:35:33,500
- Man in a bag! Man in a bag!
- No, no, no.
590
00:35:33,900 --> 00:35:35,500
It's Manservant Neville.
591
00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:37,765
Maybe I didn't read my Fatbible close enough,
592
00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:40,600
but isn't he supposed to be
in charge of this place?
593
00:35:40,635 --> 00:35:43,500
Well, nobody ever sees him because he's so...
594
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:46,000
Cryogenically frozen?
595
00:35:53,300 --> 00:35:55,100
Wendy, stay away from that thing.
596
00:35:55,500 --> 00:35:58,200
Come on, Lace, you really think
Mansicle Neville...
597
00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:01,100
It's you?
598
00:36:01,500 --> 00:36:02,665
I don't understand.
599
00:36:02,700 --> 00:36:05,600
Please, haven't you done enough to me?
600
00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:09,400
All I want is out of this misery.
601
00:36:09,500 --> 00:36:13,800
I tried to return control to the people.
602
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:17,300
But you betrayed me.
603
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:19,800
- I did?
- No.
604
00:36:21,500 --> 00:36:23,400
I did.
605
00:36:23,500 --> 00:36:26,400
Dub-Dub, why is there another Dub-Dub?
606
00:36:26,500 --> 00:36:28,400
Put down my cannon.
607
00:36:30,600 --> 00:36:32,200
You don't seem surprised to see me.
608
00:36:32,500 --> 00:36:34,665
Our HEYDAR picked up the rip in space.
609
00:36:34,700 --> 00:36:37,400
- You have a HEYDAR?
- There's little in this world I don't have.
610
00:36:37,500 --> 00:36:41,800
I know that red ray gun. You killed Tyler?
611
00:36:41,900 --> 00:36:45,400
Oh, right. The hottie.
612
00:36:46,100 --> 00:36:47,500
Hm, let me guess.
613
00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:51,865
You're a "good guy" in your world,
just like Tyler?
614
00:36:51,900 --> 00:36:55,100
Really scraping the bottom of
that sidekick barrel, aren't you?
615
00:36:55,135 --> 00:36:56,600
What is going on?
616
00:36:56,700 --> 00:37:00,400
Lacey, so typically behind the curve.
617
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:02,365
Allow me to explain.
618
00:37:02,400 --> 00:37:06,200
When I was 14, my father disappeared,
619
00:37:06,300 --> 00:37:07,965
under mysterious...
620
00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:10,800
And as of yet unexplained circumstances.
621
00:37:12,300 --> 00:37:14,400
Control room combination.
622
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:17,600
- It's the day Dad disappeared.
- So I never forget.
623
00:37:18,300 --> 00:37:21,800
Never let go of the feeling of things happening
beyond my control.
624
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:25,200
When I saw the tide turn to Fatboy,
625
00:37:25,500 --> 00:37:27,800
saw them taking over, I figured,
626
00:37:27,900 --> 00:37:31,300
why not be on the side of control for once?
627
00:37:32,500 --> 00:37:37,100
After a year of assisting
the great Manservant Neville,
628
00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:38,700
I saw what he really wanted.
629
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:40,900
To loosen Fatboy's grip,
630
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:44,800
give the power back to the people
and go green,
631
00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:46,700
whatever the hell that means.
632
00:37:46,900 --> 00:37:50,000
And so, we went our separate ways.
633
00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:54,000
- His was into this cryo-bed.
- You secretly rule Fatboy.
634
00:37:54,300 --> 00:37:56,165
That explains the no-camera policy.
635
00:37:56,200 --> 00:38:00,100
Uh, guys, when I asked what was going on,
I meant about you two being twins.
636
00:38:00,135 --> 00:38:03,500
She's me from a parallel universe,
you imbecile.
637
00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:06,800
And yes, Joe-90, there are no cameras here.
638
00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:09,100
I can't have anyone seeing me now, can I?
639
00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:11,800
- No, ma'am.
- Thanks for sounding the silent alarm.
640
00:38:16,800 --> 00:38:18,565
You killed Joe-90!
641
00:38:18,600 --> 00:38:22,400
As I was saying, only my private guards
know the truth about me.
642
00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:27,000
Gentlemen, would you please come up
to my control room?
643
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,500
Wait. There's just one thing you
haven't counted on.
644
00:38:33,300 --> 00:38:35,100
I was trained by Sensei Ping.
645
00:38:37,900 --> 00:38:40,600
The guards will be here any second.
We're fish in a barrel.
646
00:38:40,700 --> 00:38:42,700
Get the phase polaron cannon.
647
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:45,300
But please, let me go!
648
00:38:45,700 --> 00:38:47,900
Help! I'm sorry!
649
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:48,800
Miss Watson?
650
00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:51,900
Settle down, gentlemen, I've
got everything under control.
651
00:38:52,300 --> 00:38:56,800
Hey, Dub-Dub, there's just one thing
you haven't counted on.
652
00:38:57,900 --> 00:39:00,200
I can prove my identity.
653
00:39:09,300 --> 00:39:11,700
after all our history together.
654
00:39:11,735 --> 00:39:13,300
How can you do this?
655
00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:17,100
Kill your best friend and someone
who shares your body and mind?
656
00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:18,700
Is this who you are?
657
00:39:20,000 --> 00:39:22,500
You're right. What am I doing?
I can't do this.
658
00:39:22,535 --> 00:39:23,500
Really?
659
00:39:23,900 --> 00:39:26,665
Psych. Guards, ready.
660
00:39:26,700 --> 00:39:28,300
Well, it was worth a shot.
661
00:39:28,700 --> 00:39:29,665
I'm sorry, Lace.
662
00:39:29,700 --> 00:39:32,800
- Aim.
- At least I got my Dub-Dub back.
663
00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:34,300
Sorta.
664
00:39:34,600 --> 00:39:36,200
Fire.
665
00:39:39,300 --> 00:39:40,800
Eat hot death,.
666
00:39:41,400 --> 00:39:42,800
Cover your eyes!
667
00:39:47,900 --> 00:39:50,100
- Who is this guy?
- He's just The Middleman.
668
00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:53,800
He's kinda hot.
669
00:40:06,600 --> 00:40:08,500
Sorry about the Middlehog.
670
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:09,700
???It's just a bike.
671
00:40:10,100 --> 00:40:12,500
Guess you're gonna have to storm
the gates and take it back?
672
00:40:14,100 --> 00:40:16,700
I'm not about to make fighting Fatboy
my daily bread.
673
00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:19,500
First order of business after
I send you back
674
00:40:19,600 --> 00:40:22,100
is turning this city into a dot
in my rear view.
675
00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:25,400
I'm gonna hotwire a car.
676
00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:29,100
Well, you gotta do what you gotta do.
677
00:40:29,600 --> 00:40:33,000
But, uh, thank you.
678
00:40:33,100 --> 00:40:34,200
Don't do that.
679
00:40:34,300 --> 00:40:37,900
- Do what?
- Make me your hero.
680
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:41,500
Good grief, is he always like this?
681
00:40:41,700 --> 00:40:43,100
With the perma-frown?
682
00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:45,465
Lace...
683
00:40:45,500 --> 00:40:49,400
I'm just glad that the Wendy Watson
that I used to know is still alive somewhere.
684
00:40:49,700 --> 00:40:52,500
Man, Dub-Dub, you show up,
you make them love you,
685
00:40:52,535 --> 00:40:55,500
then you're off into a Quantum Singularity.???
686
00:40:55,600 --> 00:40:58,800
- What a tease.
- It's time.
687
00:41:11,300 --> 00:41:12,700
Stay.
688
00:41:13,300 --> 00:41:15,800
Fight. You're The Middleman.
689
00:41:16,000 --> 00:41:19,000
If you don't, who will?
690
00:41:37,800 --> 00:41:41,100
So, I guess you'll be going?
691
00:41:41,700 --> 00:41:43,200
You know,
692
00:41:43,900 --> 00:41:47,200
I like the way you handled yourself
back there at Fatboy Command.
693
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:52,700
Have you ever considered the exciting
field of temporary employment?
694
00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:01,800
I hate to leave you at your doorstep
after your harrowing ordeal.
695
00:42:01,835 --> 00:42:04,800
At times like these I wish O2STK
had some kind of counseling service.
696
00:42:05,100 --> 00:42:07,900
Well, you showed up to get me,
that's all the reassurance I need.
697
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:11,300
You know, Dubbie, when I saw my mirror
self through that gateway,
698
00:42:11,335 --> 00:42:13,265
a single question ran through my mind.
699
00:42:13,300 --> 00:42:16,200
No, you would not look cooler
with an eye patch.
700
00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:17,900
A man's got to wonder.
701
00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:23,000
But the question was: how far from
that other Middleman am I, really?
702
00:42:23,400 --> 00:42:25,600
I have to say, I find it a mite unsettling.
703
00:42:25,635 --> 00:42:28,600
Maybe, but it works both ways.
704
00:42:29,100 --> 00:42:31,000
And, I know if you,
705
00:42:31,300 --> 00:42:34,300
all the yous out there,
weren't you to the core,
706
00:42:34,900 --> 00:42:37,000
I would have never made it out alive.
707
00:42:37,200 --> 00:42:38,365
So, thanks.
708
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:40,600
No. Thank you, Dubbie.
709
00:42:41,300 --> 00:42:42,900
I just hope he steps up.
710
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:45,200
That world really needs its Middleman.
711
00:42:45,300 --> 00:42:46,965
That choice is in his hands now.
712
00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:50,700
Yeah. We're talking about a guy
who chooses to wear leather chaps.
713
00:43:06,500 --> 00:43:08,400
Hello, Lacey.
714
00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:13,700
Hi.
715
00:43:15,100 --> 00:43:19,600
Don't you two get any ideas.
This here's no pleasure craft.
716
00:43:38,900 --> 00:43:41,300
Fits just like a glove.
717
00:43:42,300 --> 00:43:46,400
All right, kiddies, let's kick some
coil-tailed bacon.
718
00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:55,200
Yes, Mother, me and Tyler are doing
just fine.
719
00:43:56,300 --> 00:43:58,000
I promise.
720
00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:01,900
The job is going great.
721
00:44:02,300 --> 00:44:03,900
My boss?
722
00:44:04,100 --> 00:44:06,500
Well, he's still into guns,
just like Dad.
723
00:44:07,500 --> 00:44:10,100
Yeah, I can't wait to go in tomorrow
and see what comes up.
724
00:44:12,200 --> 00:44:15,200
Really? I don't think I've heard you
say that before.
725
00:44:16,100 --> 00:44:18,100
You think I sound happy?
726
00:44:19,300 --> 00:44:23,400
Well, Mother, that might be because
all is right with the world.
727
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