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1
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(lively percussion playing) CROWD: Go! Go!
2
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Good luck tonight. May the floor be soaked
3
00:00:06,894 --> 00:00:08,962
with the blood of your enemy.
4
00:00:08,963 --> 00:00:11,264
Someone's been watching Game of Thrones.
5
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What's Game of Thrones?
6
00:00:12,700 --> 00:00:14,300
KATRINA: What are you talking about?
7
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You're supposed to plan my wedding,
8
00:00:16,470 --> 00:00:19,338
not ruin it, you whack job.
9
00:00:19,339 --> 00:00:21,774
All right, love you, Ma. Bye.
10
00:00:21,775 --> 00:00:23,876
Always ends with a positive.
11
00:00:23,877 --> 00:00:25,311
Now my mother's claiming you can't dye
12
00:00:25,312 --> 00:00:27,313
a couple of swans pink,
even if it's your wedding.
13
00:00:27,314 --> 00:00:28,414
MARJORIE: Aw, no.
14
00:00:28,415 --> 00:00:30,216
What are you gonna do?
15
00:00:30,217 --> 00:00:32,985
Just spitballing here...
uh, cancel the wedding?
16
00:00:32,986 --> 00:00:34,954
We haven't even picked a date yet.
17
00:00:34,955 --> 00:00:37,590
You're all over the place
with these crazy wedding plans.
18
00:00:37,591 --> 00:00:40,526
Yesterday she wanted a
tiara made out of sparklers.
19
00:00:40,527 --> 00:00:42,161
Yeah, until they said it wasn't safe
20
00:00:42,162 --> 00:00:43,963
'cause my veil could catch on fire.
21
00:00:43,964 --> 00:00:47,133
Don't listen to them;
it's your special day.
22
00:00:47,134 --> 00:00:48,134
Aw, thanks, Marj.
23
00:00:48,135 --> 00:00:50,336
(phone ringing) Oh, I got to take this.
24
00:00:51,171 --> 00:00:52,405
What, Ma?
25
00:00:52,406 --> 00:00:54,573
Really? That's your solution?
26
00:00:54,574 --> 00:00:56,842
What's romantic about dyeing a duck?
27
00:00:58,545 --> 00:01:00,012
Hey, guys.
28
00:01:00,013 --> 00:01:02,481
What are you going for? Lesbian scarecrow?
29
00:01:03,183 --> 00:01:04,150
Lumber-Jackie.
30
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Aw, you took mine. Come back to me.
31
00:01:06,153 --> 00:01:08,187
I am wearing a woman's plaid shirt
32
00:01:08,188 --> 00:01:09,855
because I recently realized...
33
00:01:09,856 --> 00:01:11,090
Paula Bunyan.
34
00:01:12,459 --> 00:01:15,461
I recently realized that I
need to be a little more careful
35
00:01:15,462 --> 00:01:17,296
with my outfits when announcing the games
36
00:01:17,297 --> 00:01:18,997
with my teenage cohost.
37
00:01:18,998 --> 00:01:20,766
If the Saints manage the clock,
38
00:01:20,767 --> 00:01:23,736
they should be in good
shape tonight. Jared?
39
00:01:25,972 --> 00:01:27,606
He agrees.
40
00:01:27,607 --> 00:01:29,508
So that's why I'm dressed...
41
00:01:29,509 --> 00:01:31,743
Like a human bagpipe.
42
00:01:31,744 --> 00:01:33,145
...more conservatively.
43
00:01:33,146 --> 00:01:35,747
Oh, crap. Look who we got reffing tonight.
44
00:01:35,748 --> 00:01:37,816
We hate that guy.
45
00:01:37,817 --> 00:01:39,918
I know we hate refs in
general, because they, you know,
46
00:01:39,919 --> 00:01:41,620
try to make the game fair and all...
47
00:01:42,622 --> 00:01:43,989
...but why this guy in particular?
48
00:01:43,990 --> 00:01:45,590
Over the years, he's made so many
49
00:01:45,591 --> 00:01:47,125
crappy calls against us.
50
00:01:47,126 --> 00:01:50,162
November 12, 2007... traveling.
51
00:01:50,163 --> 00:01:54,032
March 18, 2009... shot clock violation.
52
00:01:54,033 --> 00:01:56,768
Dad, when's my birthday?
53
00:01:56,769 --> 00:01:58,670
Summer?
54
00:01:58,671 --> 00:01:59,938
Ronny, that's not fair.
55
00:01:59,939 --> 00:02:01,973
You know we had too many kids.
56
00:02:01,974 --> 00:02:04,409
I've always thought he was cute.
57
00:02:04,410 --> 00:02:06,077
Cute? Please!
58
00:02:06,078 --> 00:02:08,780
If my face fell off and he offered me his,
59
00:02:08,781 --> 00:02:10,248
I still wouldn't take it.
60
00:02:10,249 --> 00:02:11,183
Even if it was
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00:02:11,184 --> 00:02:12,551
the last face on earth
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00:02:12,552 --> 00:02:15,086
that could be safely
harvested and installed.
63
00:02:15,087 --> 00:02:16,655
Smart, Gerard. A lot of times
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00:02:16,656 --> 00:02:19,791
people's faces fall off and
there's no plan in place.
65
00:02:20,860 --> 00:02:22,127
(whistle blows)
66
00:02:22,128 --> 00:02:23,595
Foul?!
67
00:02:23,596 --> 00:02:24,829
That's not a foul!
68
00:02:24,830 --> 00:02:27,365
I've seen better calls
at the suicide hotline!
69
00:02:28,334 --> 00:02:30,001
What game are you watching, ref?
70
00:02:30,002 --> 00:02:31,870
That's right, Arthur, you let him have it.
71
00:02:31,871 --> 00:02:33,238
But remember your blood pressure...
72
00:02:33,239 --> 00:02:34,539
you're a walking time bomb.
73
00:02:34,540 --> 00:02:36,941
Hey, settle down, Coach! That's a warning.
74
00:02:36,942 --> 00:02:39,277
Ronny, go out there and argue the call.
75
00:02:39,278 --> 00:02:41,446
Maybe get a technical. Fire the team up.
76
00:02:41,447 --> 00:02:43,648
As a guidance counselor,
I try to be constructive.
77
00:02:43,649 --> 00:02:45,850
Maybe if I start with
a couple of compliments
78
00:02:45,851 --> 00:02:48,686
on the calls we like,
he'll be more receptive...
79
00:02:48,687 --> 00:02:50,588
Will you just get out there!
80
00:02:50,589 --> 00:02:52,223
That's a nice vest,
81
00:02:52,224 --> 00:02:54,993
but I don't appreciate you yelling at me.
82
00:02:57,696 --> 00:03:00,031
Dude, how was that even a foul?
83
00:03:00,032 --> 00:03:02,934
He made contact with the
shooter during a shot.
84
00:03:02,935 --> 00:03:04,936
Well, that's new information.
85
00:03:04,937 --> 00:03:08,539
But, I mean, still, come on,
how do you know he did that?
86
00:03:08,540 --> 00:03:11,075
Because I saw it and I heard it.
87
00:03:11,076 --> 00:03:13,611
So you just have an answer
for everything, don't you?
88
00:03:13,612 --> 00:03:14,645
Yeah.
89
00:03:14,646 --> 00:03:15,646
I amuse you?
90
00:03:15,647 --> 00:03:17,381
You know what amuses me?
91
00:03:17,382 --> 00:03:19,817
You calling yourself a ref!
92
00:03:19,818 --> 00:03:20,918
Ha-ha-ha!
93
00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:22,320
Amused!
94
00:03:22,321 --> 00:03:26,390
You know, I have never been
insulted so adorably before.
95
00:03:26,391 --> 00:03:28,826
Wait, are you flirting with me?
96
00:03:28,827 --> 00:03:30,828
I am. I think you're very cute.
97
00:03:30,829 --> 00:03:34,632
Well, that's the first
good call you've made.
98
00:03:34,633 --> 00:03:36,567
Ronny, what are you doing? Give him hell!
99
00:03:36,568 --> 00:03:39,170
Oh. I have to look mad, but I am not!
100
00:03:39,171 --> 00:03:41,105
You want to get a drink after the game?!
101
00:03:41,106 --> 00:03:42,239
That sounds nice!
102
00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:43,941
And maybe we'll get a bite to eat, too!
103
00:03:43,942 --> 00:03:46,210
Fine! We'll work out the details later!
104
00:03:46,211 --> 00:03:47,311
Fine!
105
00:03:47,312 --> 00:03:48,445
Oh.
106
00:03:48,446 --> 00:03:49,680
I'm supposed to get a technical.
107
00:03:49,681 --> 00:03:51,015
You want me to just throw you out?
108
00:03:51,016 --> 00:03:52,383
No. Yes. I don't know.
109
00:03:52,384 --> 00:03:54,018
This is so exciting! (whistle blows)
110
00:03:54,019 --> 00:03:54,919
You're out of here!
111
00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:56,754
Oh! What?!
112
00:03:56,755 --> 00:03:58,322
That boy is an angel!
113
00:03:58,323 --> 00:04:00,424
Huh. Now every member of the family's
114
00:04:00,425 --> 00:04:01,892
been kicked out of a basketball game.
115
00:04:01,893 --> 00:04:03,127
I was not kicked out.
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I was escorted.
117
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Sync and corrections by: kDragon
www.Addic7ed.com
118
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The McCarthys SO1E11
Original air date 29/01
119
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Hey, I, uh, want to apologize
120
00:04:13,478 --> 00:04:15,613
for my family's behavior at the game.
121
00:04:15,614 --> 00:04:18,549
I wish I could say they
mean well, but they don't.
122
00:04:18,550 --> 00:04:21,018
They just don't.
123
00:04:21,019 --> 00:04:23,354
Wait. You're a McCarthy?
124
00:04:23,355 --> 00:04:24,922
You didn't know?
125
00:04:24,923 --> 00:04:26,957
Thank you.
126
00:04:26,958 --> 00:04:28,559
Hey, I've dealt with worse.
127
00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:31,429
Which is not true... they're
the worst I've ever dealt with.
128
00:04:31,430 --> 00:04:32,596
Ah.
129
00:04:32,597 --> 00:04:34,465
That's not a deal-breaker, is it?
130
00:04:34,466 --> 00:04:36,367
No. Not at all.
131
00:04:36,368 --> 00:04:38,202
Good. I'm glad.
132
00:04:38,203 --> 00:04:40,070
In fact, it might be kind of fun
133
00:04:40,071 --> 00:04:42,640
to be the bad boy that
the family disapproves of.
134
00:04:42,641 --> 00:04:44,675
You're from the wrong side of the tracks,
135
00:04:44,676 --> 00:04:46,477
but I see good in you.
136
00:04:46,478 --> 00:04:48,545
Why won't they let us be together?
137
00:04:48,546 --> 00:04:50,047
I don't know, Johnny.
138
00:04:50,048 --> 00:04:53,851
I blame society and its
stupid, stupid rules.
139
00:04:53,852 --> 00:04:55,152
You know my name is Doug, right?
140
00:04:55,153 --> 00:04:56,920
Yeah, but Johnny's a
better “bad boy” name.
141
00:04:56,921 --> 00:04:58,055
Yeah. Totally. Okay.
142
00:04:58,056 --> 00:05:00,824
The forbidden romance of Johnny and...
143
00:05:00,825 --> 00:05:02,893
- Who are you, Billy?
- No, I'm Rhonda.
144
00:05:03,761 --> 00:05:04,928
The preacher's daughter.
145
00:05:04,929 --> 00:05:06,997
Who's got to get out
of this one-horse town
146
00:05:06,998 --> 00:05:09,833
'cause she's tired of
sewing her own dresses.
147
00:05:10,535 --> 00:05:12,269
Or Billy. Whatever.
148
00:05:14,605 --> 00:05:16,540
(doorbell rings)
149
00:05:17,375 --> 00:05:18,442
Oh, hey, Katrina.
150
00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:20,744
Gerard's not here, so on your way.
151
00:05:20,745 --> 00:05:22,112
Oh. No...
152
00:05:22,113 --> 00:05:24,948
I actually didn't come to talk to Gerard.
153
00:05:24,949 --> 00:05:26,149
And you didn't talk to him.
154
00:05:26,150 --> 00:05:27,384
- Mission accomplished!
- No, no.
155
00:05:28,486 --> 00:05:31,755
Marj, did you guys go out
for Chinese last night?
156
00:05:31,756 --> 00:05:33,623
It was last-minute. We didn't think to...
157
00:05:33,624 --> 00:05:35,158
Oh, wait a minute, we didn't.
158
00:05:35,159 --> 00:05:37,761
Gerard said he had Chinese
with you guys last night,
159
00:05:37,762 --> 00:05:39,396
but clearly he was lying.
160
00:05:39,397 --> 00:05:41,798
(sighs) I think he might be cheating on me.
161
00:05:41,799 --> 00:05:44,100
What? Gerard? He would never.
162
00:05:44,101 --> 00:05:45,936
I know. I never would have suspected him,
163
00:05:45,937 --> 00:05:48,138
but when I checked the
odometer on his car...
164
00:05:48,139 --> 00:05:50,573
Wait, you check his odometer?
165
00:05:50,574 --> 00:05:51,908
Yeah, once a week.
166
00:05:51,909 --> 00:05:53,777
Well, there's your mistake.
Why check the odometer
167
00:05:53,778 --> 00:05:55,879
when you can just hang on to the bottom
168
00:05:55,880 --> 00:05:58,648
like Robert De Niro in Cape Fear?
169
00:05:58,649 --> 00:06:01,785
Oh, my God, that movie was so funny!
170
00:06:01,786 --> 00:06:03,753
Wow.
171
00:06:03,754 --> 00:06:05,722
Plus, the other day, I found
a receipt in his pocket.
172
00:06:05,723 --> 00:06:07,190
You also go through his pockets.
173
00:06:07,191 --> 00:06:08,525
Good. Yeah.
174
00:06:08,526 --> 00:06:10,693
It was from an Arby's
all the way up iLowell.
175
00:06:10,694 --> 00:06:12,629
And ever since we started
planning the wedding,
176
00:06:12,630 --> 00:06:16,065
he's just been acting
really tense and squirrely.
177
00:06:16,066 --> 00:06:17,667
Oh, well, he's always been that way.
178
00:06:17,668 --> 00:06:18,935
When he and Sean were born,
179
00:06:18,936 --> 00:06:20,870
the doctor said, “The big one is relaxed,
180
00:06:20,871 --> 00:06:23,806
but the little one's
tense and squirrely. ”
181
00:06:23,807 --> 00:06:25,375
Marj, I'm worried.
182
00:06:25,376 --> 00:06:27,977
Last night was the first time
in as long as I can remember
183
00:06:27,978 --> 00:06:29,912
that we went to bed without fighting.
184
00:06:29,913 --> 00:06:32,482
Katrina, look, I raised that boy.
185
00:06:32,483 --> 00:06:34,283
I promise you,
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00:06:34,284 --> 00:06:36,652
no one is more loyal than he is.
187
00:06:36,653 --> 00:06:38,421
Well, I hope you're right, Marj.
188
00:06:38,422 --> 00:06:40,022
'Cause if he's cheating on me,
189
00:06:40,023 --> 00:06:43,226
there is no way I'm marrying him.
190
00:06:47,831 --> 00:06:49,732
Gerard might be cheating on Katrina!
191
00:06:50,500 --> 00:06:52,535
What? No.
192
00:06:52,536 --> 00:06:54,937
I know my twin better than
anyone I've ever shared
193
00:06:54,938 --> 00:06:57,306
a womb with; Gerard would
never cheat on Katrina.
194
00:06:57,307 --> 00:06:58,774
I don't think he'd cheat either.
195
00:06:58,775 --> 00:07:01,911
But even if he was, why would
you be so happy about it?
196
00:07:01,912 --> 00:07:04,113
Do I have to spell it out?
197
00:07:04,114 --> 00:07:06,282
He's cheating, she finds out,
198
00:07:06,283 --> 00:07:08,417
wedding's off, Katrina's gone,
199
00:07:08,418 --> 00:07:11,120
ticker tape parade!
200
00:07:11,121 --> 00:07:14,957
Sailors kissing nurses in the street!
201
00:07:14,958 --> 00:07:17,760
The economy rebounds!
202
00:07:18,862 --> 00:07:21,697
Why is nobody more excited?!
203
00:07:21,698 --> 00:07:25,234
Oh, right. We don't want to jinx it.
204
00:07:30,907 --> 00:07:32,174
(knocking)
205
00:07:32,175 --> 00:07:33,609
Be there in a jiffy.
206
00:07:33,610 --> 00:07:35,677
(quietly): Jiffy?
207
00:07:38,114 --> 00:07:39,715
What the hell's a jiffy?
208
00:07:39,716 --> 00:07:41,850
A short amount of time.
Why are we coming in?
209
00:07:41,851 --> 00:07:43,118
Why are we closing the door?
210
00:07:43,119 --> 00:07:45,721
Ronny, I want to tell you I'm proud of you.
211
00:07:45,722 --> 00:07:47,055
What's with the wine?
212
00:07:47,056 --> 00:07:49,124
I enjoy a little wine in the evening.
213
00:07:49,125 --> 00:07:50,092
Two glasses?
214
00:07:50,093 --> 00:07:52,628
I enjoy a lot of wine in the evening.
215
00:07:52,629 --> 00:07:53,629
So, Dad, you were saying?
216
00:07:53,630 --> 00:07:55,163
Right. Ronny...
217
00:07:55,164 --> 00:07:57,099
Didn't you used to have
four pillows on your couch?
218
00:07:57,100 --> 00:07:58,834
Marjorie, please, we're having a jiffy.
219
00:07:58,835 --> 00:08:01,169
Jiffies are quick. This is not a jiffy.
220
00:08:01,170 --> 00:08:03,138
At the game last night, you showed me
221
00:08:03,139 --> 00:08:05,407
that you share my passion for coaching.
222
00:08:05,408 --> 00:08:07,542
Oh, there's the fourth
pillow. Why is it over here?
223
00:08:07,543 --> 00:08:08,844
Because I like it there.
224
00:08:08,845 --> 00:08:11,346
When did this happen? I
feel like we're drifting.
225
00:08:11,347 --> 00:08:12,848
Anyway...
226
00:08:12,849 --> 00:08:16,084
for what you did at that
game, you've earned this.
227
00:08:16,085 --> 00:08:17,285
A whistle?
228
00:08:17,286 --> 00:08:18,620
My father gave me this.
229
00:08:18,621 --> 00:08:22,190
And now... I'm giving it to you.
230
00:08:24,327 --> 00:08:25,961
Thank you, Dad.
231
00:08:25,962 --> 00:08:27,662
I'm really honored.
232
00:08:27,663 --> 00:08:29,531
Are these Grandpa's teeth marks?
233
00:08:29,532 --> 00:08:31,900
Okay, truth is, that may not be Grandpa's.
234
00:08:31,901 --> 00:08:33,668
I find a lot of whistles.
235
00:08:33,669 --> 00:08:35,103
Great. Well...
236
00:08:35,104 --> 00:08:36,871
I will boil this and wear it with pride.
237
00:08:36,872 --> 00:08:38,006
Good night.
238
00:08:38,007 --> 00:08:39,874
Wait. Ronny, I also have great news.
239
00:08:39,875 --> 00:08:42,243
Gerard might be cheating on Katrina.
240
00:08:42,244 --> 00:08:44,713
What? There's no way that's true.
241
00:08:44,714 --> 00:08:46,481
Oh, yeah? Well, apparently, the other night
242
00:08:46,482 --> 00:08:49,150
he went to the Arby's in Lowell.
243
00:08:49,151 --> 00:08:51,586
That is where the movie stars go to cheat.
244
00:08:51,587 --> 00:08:54,255
Now, thanks for the whistle
and for the latest Arby's buzz.
245
00:08:54,256 --> 00:08:56,257
Good night.
246
00:08:56,258 --> 00:08:57,592
Oh.
247
00:08:57,593 --> 00:08:59,661
Hello.
248
00:08:59,662 --> 00:09:00,595
Oh, my God.
249
00:09:00,596 --> 00:09:02,597
What the hell is he doing here?
250
00:09:02,598 --> 00:09:04,599
Who knows? But he better get out of here,
251
00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:07,335
and he better not come
back in, like, half an hour
252
00:09:07,336 --> 00:09:09,203
if that works for him, time-wise!
253
00:09:09,204 --> 00:09:10,405
MARJORIE: Wait a minute,
254
00:09:10,406 --> 00:09:12,140
it all adds up.
255
00:09:12,141 --> 00:09:14,275
Two wineglasses, pillows rearranged
256
00:09:14,276 --> 00:09:16,144
in a suggestive manner.
257
00:09:16,145 --> 00:09:18,146
This is a date!
258
00:09:24,586 --> 00:09:27,755
This is going right back
in the lost-and-found box.
259
00:09:31,460 --> 00:09:33,461
Preacher's mad, Rhonda.
260
00:09:33,462 --> 00:09:35,329
Preacher's real mad.
261
00:09:41,656 --> 00:09:42,555
Hey, guys.
262
00:09:42,556 --> 00:09:44,557
Really? Save your “hey, guys”"
263
00:09:44,558 --> 00:09:47,527
We all know your dirty little secret.
264
00:09:47,528 --> 00:09:50,130
Ronny, you know I never quote the Bible,
265
00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:53,099
but “man shall not
lie down with refs. ”
266
00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:55,034
You still haven't quoted the Bible.
267
00:09:55,035 --> 00:09:56,636
I still think Doug's really cute.
268
00:09:56,637 --> 00:09:57,637
What?
269
00:09:57,638 --> 00:10:00,039
I mean he's gross. I have no courage.
270
00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,642
Okay, seriously, you guys?
271
00:10:02,643 --> 00:10:06,279
Ronny, what if word gets out?
What would people think of us?
272
00:10:06,280 --> 00:10:09,282
In your mind, what do
people think of us right now?
273
00:10:09,283 --> 00:10:10,917
Solid citizens,
274
00:10:10,918 --> 00:10:12,185
pillars of the community.
275
00:10:12,186 --> 00:10:15,054
Basically, we're the modern-day Kennedys.
276
00:10:15,055 --> 00:10:16,856
Okay, this is insane.
277
00:10:16,857 --> 00:10:19,726
You're all making a
blanket judgment about refs.
278
00:10:19,727 --> 00:10:22,028
When the Irish first came to America,
279
00:10:22,029 --> 00:10:24,530
people hated them just
because they were from Ireland.
280
00:10:24,531 --> 00:10:26,199
Sure, but once everyone got to know us,
281
00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:28,301
they realized we're delightful.
282
00:10:28,302 --> 00:10:30,469
Yes. Once they got to know us.
283
00:10:30,470 --> 00:10:32,071
And you guys don't even know Doug.
284
00:10:32,072 --> 00:10:33,806
What else do we need to know?
285
00:10:33,807 --> 00:10:36,843
Well, for one thing, reffing
isn't even his only job.
286
00:10:36,844 --> 00:10:38,744
He also builds boats.
287
00:10:38,745 --> 00:10:40,479
Boat builder? Ugh.
288
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:42,048
Like we need more boats.
289
00:10:42,049 --> 00:10:44,350
Gerard's right, the
water's laden with them.
290
00:10:44,351 --> 00:10:45,618
ARTHUR: Look, Ronny,
291
00:10:45,619 --> 00:10:47,086
you need to understand, your mother and I
292
00:10:47,087 --> 00:10:48,554
are from a different generation.
293
00:10:48,555 --> 00:10:51,757
Oh, the old “different
generation” excuse again.
294
00:10:51,758 --> 00:10:53,159
When have I ever used that?
295
00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:56,395
Recycling. Seatbelts. ATMs.
296
00:10:56,396 --> 00:10:59,999
Hey, I'm not feeding my checks to a robot.
297
00:11:01,201 --> 00:11:03,035
You know what you are?
298
00:11:03,036 --> 00:11:06,672
You're all... refist.
299
00:11:06,673 --> 00:11:07,973
Whoa. Hey.
300
00:11:07,974 --> 00:11:10,109
That is a harsh made-up word.
301
00:11:10,110 --> 00:11:12,444
We're not refist, we're just old-timey.
302
00:11:12,445 --> 00:11:14,380
That's not a new point; that's your
303
00:11:14,381 --> 00:11:17,483
“different generation”
excuse dressed up in new words.
304
00:11:17,484 --> 00:11:20,386
What can I say? I'm from a bygone era.
305
00:11:20,387 --> 00:11:22,955
Maybe we should get to know him.
306
00:11:22,956 --> 00:11:25,424
Oh, please. Like they'd even try.
307
00:11:25,425 --> 00:11:27,059
They're not open-minded enough.
308
00:11:27,060 --> 00:11:30,696
Oh, really? Well, how's
this for open-minded?
309
00:11:30,697 --> 00:11:32,297
Bring him over for dinner tomorrow night.
310
00:11:32,298 --> 00:11:34,700
Oh, no. That's not necessary.
311
00:11:34,701 --> 00:11:36,635
Interesting... you
accuse us of being refist,
312
00:11:36,636 --> 00:11:39,071
but you don't give us a
chance to prove that we're not.
313
00:11:39,072 --> 00:11:40,606
I think we know
314
00:11:40,607 --> 00:11:42,908
who's really closed-minded here, don't we?
315
00:11:43,743 --> 00:11:46,812
You know what? I will bring him over.
316
00:11:46,813 --> 00:11:49,247
Oh, no. Not necessary.
317
00:11:49,248 --> 00:11:52,618
Hmm. Looks like we're back
to you being closed-minded.
318
00:11:52,619 --> 00:11:53,685
Damn it.
319
00:11:53,686 --> 00:11:54,920
Fine.
320
00:11:54,921 --> 00:11:56,088
Dinner tomorrow night.
321
00:11:56,089 --> 00:11:58,723
Damn it.
322
00:11:58,724 --> 00:12:00,959
Fine. Doug and I will be here at 7:00.
323
00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:02,894
Why not come at 6:00?
We'll be here at 5:00.
324
00:12:02,895 --> 00:12:05,864
I don't think anybody
wants to eat that early.
325
00:12:05,865 --> 00:12:08,066
See you and Doug here
tomorrow night, Ronny.
326
00:12:09,202 --> 00:12:10,802
I'm not like the rest of them.
327
00:12:10,803 --> 00:12:13,071
I'm gonna keep on thinking he's cute.
328
00:12:13,072 --> 00:12:15,173
Thank you, Jackie. You're an inspiration.
329
00:12:15,174 --> 00:12:17,275
Should I sing? No.
330
00:12:20,379 --> 00:12:21,947
Hey, Gerard, you want
to watch the game later?
331
00:12:21,948 --> 00:12:23,882
I can't. Busy. Yeah, me too.
332
00:12:23,883 --> 00:12:26,351
I got to watch the game later.
333
00:12:27,753 --> 00:12:29,988
Busy, huh?
334
00:12:29,989 --> 00:12:31,890
Where you off to?
335
00:12:31,891 --> 00:12:33,124
Why the third degree?
336
00:12:33,125 --> 00:12:35,693
Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to pry.
337
00:12:35,694 --> 00:12:39,597
All right, if you must know...
I got to go to the store.
338
00:12:39,598 --> 00:12:41,099
Return some shoes.
339
00:12:41,100 --> 00:12:42,534
They're too small.
340
00:12:42,535 --> 00:12:45,270
Oh, well, thanks for your candor.
341
00:12:47,573 --> 00:12:50,808
It's confirmed: Gerard
is cheating on Katrina.
342
00:12:50,809 --> 00:12:52,110
What are you talking about?
343
00:12:52,111 --> 00:12:54,579
He's returning shoes
because they're too small?
344
00:12:54,580 --> 00:12:56,748
No shoes have ever been
too small on Gerard.
345
00:12:56,749 --> 00:13:00,284
He's got the feet of a geisha.
346
00:13:05,416 --> 00:13:06,583
Hello, everyone.
347
00:13:06,584 --> 00:13:07,484
You all remember
348
00:13:07,485 --> 00:13:09,285
Doug, who was gracious enough
349
00:13:09,286 --> 00:13:12,155
to come here and set aside past hostility.
350
00:13:14,425 --> 00:13:16,392
For present hostility.
351
00:13:17,194 --> 00:13:18,628
Thank you so much for having me.
352
00:13:18,629 --> 00:13:20,296
You have a very lovely home.
353
00:13:20,297 --> 00:13:21,331
How do you know?
354
00:13:21,332 --> 00:13:23,132
You can't see it.
355
00:13:24,234 --> 00:13:27,103
Because I'm blind. Okay, that's a new one.
356
00:13:27,104 --> 00:13:28,371
Nice manners.
357
00:13:28,372 --> 00:13:31,808
Comes over and judges the
freshness of our insults.
358
00:13:31,809 --> 00:13:34,277
You know, maybe this
wasn't such a good idea.
359
00:13:34,278 --> 00:13:35,611
No, it's fine.
360
00:13:35,612 --> 00:13:36,879
Guys, Doug's here
361
00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:39,415
so you can all show
how open-minded you are.
362
00:13:39,416 --> 00:13:43,186
So be better. Be...
better people than you are.
363
00:13:43,187 --> 00:13:44,654
Fine.
364
00:13:44,655 --> 00:13:46,088
Welcome, Doug.
365
00:13:46,089 --> 00:13:48,558
We feel neutral, if not slightly positive,
366
00:13:48,559 --> 00:13:50,193
about you being here.
367
00:13:50,194 --> 00:13:52,528
Doug, the stripes on your referee shirt
368
00:13:52,529 --> 00:13:54,730
are perfectly parallel... good work there.
369
00:13:54,731 --> 00:13:56,098
Well, I didn't make the shirt.
370
00:13:56,099 --> 00:13:58,034
Just take the compliment. It's all I got.
371
00:13:59,036 --> 00:14:00,303
You're okay with me.
372
00:14:00,304 --> 00:14:02,138
I don't judge people by
the color of their shirts,
373
00:14:02,139 --> 00:14:04,206
only by their physical attractiveness.
374
00:14:04,207 --> 00:14:06,609
Well, that's... better?
375
00:14:06,610 --> 00:14:07,810
Much better.
376
00:14:07,811 --> 00:14:11,247
Dad? Anything you want to add?
377
00:14:11,248 --> 00:14:12,515
Fine.
378
00:14:12,516 --> 00:14:16,218
On November 12, 2007...
379
00:14:17,220 --> 00:14:21,056
my player may have taken a third step.
380
00:14:22,926 --> 00:14:24,960
Oh, okay. Thank you.
381
00:14:24,961 --> 00:14:26,996
Uh, not sure that that was me.
382
00:14:26,997 --> 00:14:28,831
I wasn't even reffing back then.
383
00:14:28,832 --> 00:14:30,566
Oh, sorry.
384
00:14:30,567 --> 00:14:32,167
You all look alike to me.
385
00:14:32,168 --> 00:14:34,103
Dad.
386
00:14:34,104 --> 00:14:36,038
You can't say that.
387
00:14:36,039 --> 00:14:37,139
Why, Ronny?
388
00:14:37,140 --> 00:14:39,241
Why can't we say how we really feel?
389
00:14:40,243 --> 00:14:41,743
I don't like you, Doug.
390
00:14:42,779 --> 00:14:44,413
I don't like what you stand for.
391
00:14:44,414 --> 00:14:45,981
I don't like your boats.
392
00:14:46,850 --> 00:14:48,750
All you refs do is walk around
393
00:14:48,751 --> 00:14:50,853
telling people what they did wrong.
394
00:14:50,854 --> 00:14:52,888
Well, I tried blowing the
whistle to compliment people...
395
00:14:52,889 --> 00:14:55,857
kind of slowed down the games.
396
00:14:55,858 --> 00:14:57,426
I don't like your quips.
397
00:14:58,461 --> 00:15:00,762
Well, well, well.
398
00:15:00,763 --> 00:15:02,097
Look who's here.
399
00:15:02,098 --> 00:15:04,900
I thought you'd be off in
Lowell, rolling around naked
400
00:15:04,901 --> 00:15:06,501
in a bunch of roast beef.
401
00:15:06,502 --> 00:15:09,504
What? What are you talking about?
402
00:15:09,505 --> 00:15:11,006
Katrina, you seem upset.
403
00:15:11,007 --> 00:15:14,309
Go ahead, sweetie, air it all out.
404
00:15:14,310 --> 00:15:15,510
Admit it, Gerard!
405
00:15:15,511 --> 00:15:17,546
You're cheating on me with
some skank from Lowell.
406
00:15:17,547 --> 00:15:19,915
What? I would never cheat on you.
407
00:15:19,916 --> 00:15:22,284
Oh yeah? Well, I know
you're going to Lowell,
408
00:15:22,285 --> 00:15:24,252
and you always bring this bag with you.
409
00:15:24,253 --> 00:15:26,955
What is this? Your overnight cheating bag?
410
00:15:26,956 --> 00:15:29,257
And why does it have a
lock on it? What's in it?
411
00:15:29,258 --> 00:15:30,625
Fling paraphernalia?
412
00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:32,927
Slutty underwear?
413
00:15:33,763 --> 00:15:35,563
Axe body spray?
414
00:15:35,564 --> 00:15:37,799
Katrina, you're wrong.
415
00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:39,467
Okay, if you're not cheating,
416
00:15:39,468 --> 00:15:41,569
then I guess you wouldn't mind
opening this bag right now.
417
00:15:41,570 --> 00:15:44,739
Katrina, don't do this...
not in front of my family.
418
00:15:44,740 --> 00:15:46,975
Open this right now or
I will leave you forever!
419
00:15:46,976 --> 00:15:49,444
Why do you even need to see
what's in the bag, Katrina?
420
00:15:49,445 --> 00:15:51,146
Go with your gut.
421
00:15:53,015 --> 00:15:55,049
Gerard, I'm waiting.
422
00:15:56,852 --> 00:15:58,553
Fine.
423
00:16:05,894 --> 00:16:07,729
Oh, my God.
424
00:16:07,730 --> 00:16:08,596
What?
425
00:16:08,597 --> 00:16:10,965
My boy's a ref.
426
00:16:11,834 --> 00:16:13,501
That's right, I've been reffing.
427
00:16:14,336 --> 00:16:16,137
Oh, my God, Arthur.
428
00:16:16,138 --> 00:16:18,606
I thought we did everything right.
429
00:16:19,742 --> 00:16:20,908
So you're not cheating?
430
00:16:20,909 --> 00:16:22,310
We haven't heard the whole story.
431
00:16:22,311 --> 00:16:24,078
He still may be.
432
00:16:24,913 --> 00:16:26,714
It was just part-time.
433
00:16:26,715 --> 00:16:28,583
But why didn't you tell me?
434
00:16:28,584 --> 00:16:31,686
Because I was trying to save
extra money for our wedding,
435
00:16:31,687 --> 00:16:34,722
and I knew you'd feel bad if
I was working an extra job.
436
00:16:34,723 --> 00:16:37,925
Oh, Ger-Bear, you're wrong.
437
00:16:37,926 --> 00:16:40,194
I was gonna say, why
don't you get an extra job
438
00:16:40,195 --> 00:16:42,363
so we could have a nicer wedding?
439
00:16:42,364 --> 00:16:43,464
Really?
440
00:16:43,465 --> 00:16:44,565
Yeah.
441
00:16:44,566 --> 00:16:46,333
But of all the ways to make money...
442
00:16:47,035 --> 00:16:48,602
why reffing?
443
00:16:49,604 --> 00:16:51,539
Someone offered me a reffing gig.
444
00:16:51,540 --> 00:16:55,309
And I said I'd only do it
once, but it was so easy.
445
00:16:56,344 --> 00:16:57,678
And the money was good.
446
00:16:57,679 --> 00:16:59,113
Eventually, I just
447
00:16:59,114 --> 00:17:00,181
learned how to...
448
00:17:00,182 --> 00:17:02,549
go dead inside while I was doing it.
449
00:17:04,753 --> 00:17:07,521
I assume you'll all never
want to speak to me again,
450
00:17:07,522 --> 00:17:09,323
so...
451
00:17:09,324 --> 00:17:11,625
I guess this is good-bye.
452
00:17:14,562 --> 00:17:15,963
Gerard.
453
00:17:16,998 --> 00:17:19,166
You'll always be my son.
454
00:17:21,636 --> 00:17:25,572
Is this really just about being a referee?
455
00:17:25,573 --> 00:17:27,074
No.
456
00:17:27,075 --> 00:17:29,576
Yes.
457
00:17:29,577 --> 00:17:31,044
(whistle blows)
458
00:17:32,514 --> 00:17:33,981
How things change, you know?
459
00:17:33,982 --> 00:17:36,316
I'm glad I got to know
that guy as a person.
460
00:17:36,317 --> 00:17:38,852
Yeah, now with all that drama behind us,
461
00:17:38,853 --> 00:17:40,988
I'm getting to know him, too.
462
00:17:40,989 --> 00:17:45,092
See, today's boats are typically
built with a U-shaped hull.
463
00:17:45,093 --> 00:17:46,193
But really it's the Vikings
464
00:17:46,194 --> 00:17:47,594
who should get all the credit for this,
465
00:17:47,595 --> 00:17:50,630
because they knew more
than we ever imagined
466
00:17:50,631 --> 00:17:53,366
about water displacement.
467
00:17:53,367 --> 00:17:55,102
You know what I find really fascinating?
468
00:17:55,103 --> 00:17:56,703
Is it boat-related?
469
00:17:56,704 --> 00:17:58,038
Yeah, it's boat-related.
470
00:17:58,039 --> 00:18:00,473
Studies have shown that U-shaped hulls
471
00:18:00,474 --> 00:18:03,710
attract more barnacles
than V-shaped hulls.
472
00:18:03,711 --> 00:18:05,912
You know who doesn't care about barnacles?
473
00:18:05,913 --> 00:18:07,914
Bad Boy Johnny.
474
00:18:07,915 --> 00:18:11,017
Rhonda, you are a bad influence. Oh, yeah?
475
00:18:11,018 --> 00:18:13,987
Yeah, 'cause you got
to care about barnacles.
476
00:18:13,988 --> 00:18:16,189
I guess I was so focused
on the family stuff
477
00:18:16,190 --> 00:18:18,825
that I didn't realize we
have nothing in common.
478
00:18:18,826 --> 00:18:21,494
He calls you Rhonda?
479
00:18:21,495 --> 00:18:24,931
As soon as I said it, I knew
it'd become the headline.
480
00:18:27,668 --> 00:18:29,736
(whistle blows) What? That didn't look like
481
00:18:29,737 --> 00:18:31,771
traveling to me. Me neither.
482
00:18:31,772 --> 00:18:34,974
But as I've learned,
Doug is a human person.
483
00:18:34,975 --> 00:18:37,277
So be respectful when you
go out there and tell him
484
00:18:37,278 --> 00:18:39,112
that was a garbage call.
485
00:18:42,082 --> 00:18:44,183
Come on. Traveling? Really?
486
00:18:44,184 --> 00:18:45,985
That's my call. Speaking of which,
487
00:18:45,986 --> 00:18:48,421
I haven't heard from you
in a few days. What's up?
488
00:18:48,422 --> 00:18:50,723
Oh. Now?
489
00:18:50,724 --> 00:18:52,225
Okay.
490
00:18:52,226 --> 00:18:53,593
Doug, you're great.
491
00:18:53,594 --> 00:18:57,563
You're smart and you know
so very much about boats,
492
00:18:57,564 --> 00:19:00,900
but I just don't think we
have a whole lot in common.
493
00:19:00,901 --> 00:19:02,635
Oh.
494
00:19:02,636 --> 00:19:03,970
I get it.
495
00:19:03,971 --> 00:19:05,338
Thank you for understanding.
496
00:19:05,339 --> 00:19:07,106
Yeah, you took a walk on the wild side,
497
00:19:07,107 --> 00:19:09,075
pissed off your parents
a little, now you can
498
00:19:09,076 --> 00:19:11,611
tell all your friends
you've been with a ref.
499
00:19:11,612 --> 00:19:13,312
What? What are you talking about?
500
00:19:13,313 --> 00:19:15,548
You got a taste of the stripes?
501
00:19:15,549 --> 00:19:18,184
Satisfied your zebra fever?
502
00:19:18,185 --> 00:19:19,952
That's not even a thing.
503
00:19:19,953 --> 00:19:21,253
Admit it, Ronny.
504
00:19:21,254 --> 00:19:23,089
You'll never see me as more than a referee.
505
00:19:23,090 --> 00:19:25,057
- What?
- You know what? (whistle blows)
506
00:19:25,058 --> 00:19:27,226
Get off my court!
507
00:19:28,762 --> 00:19:30,296
What was that?
508
00:19:30,297 --> 00:19:31,630
He played the ref card.
509
00:19:31,631 --> 00:19:34,706
Hey, you watch your mouth.
Your brother's a ref.
510
00:19:34,707 --> 00:19:38,608
Sync and corrections by: kDragon
www.Addic7ed.com
511
00:19:38,658 --> 00:19:43,208
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