Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,635 --> 00:00:03,335
This is a really
special day, Charlie.
2
00:00:03,247 --> 00:00:06,814
I never thought I'd see myself
in a long-term relationship.
3
00:00:06,689 --> 00:00:08,355
Happy one-month anniversary.
4
00:00:11,054 --> 00:00:12,954
Hey, guys!
5
00:00:12,902 --> 00:00:16,102
Enjoying your lunch?
6
00:00:15,993 --> 00:00:19,060
Okay, this has been fun.
I-I'll see ya later.
7
00:00:18,956 --> 00:00:20,522
Oh, Caitlin, I'm sorry.
8
00:00:20,484 --> 00:00:21,718
Why don't you join us?
9
00:00:21,695 --> 00:00:23,163
I don't want to interrupt.
10
00:00:23,130 --> 00:00:24,596
That's all right. Ahem.
11
00:00:24,563 --> 00:00:27,397
I should moisturize.
12
00:00:27,303 --> 00:00:30,236
Actually, I have to bring this food back
to the office, so maybe some other time.
13
00:00:30,139 --> 00:00:31,572
How about the three of us
have dinner tonight?
14
00:00:31,542 --> 00:00:33,175
Oh, I'd love that.
15
00:00:33,134 --> 00:00:35,268
See you later.
16
00:00:35,205 --> 00:00:36,704
That's very sweet of you,
17
00:00:36,671 --> 00:00:38,838
inviting Caitlin to dinner
with us.
18
00:00:38,774 --> 00:00:41,308
Well, I want to get to know
your friends.
19
00:00:42,948 --> 00:00:44,614
Oh, great.
20
00:00:44,573 --> 00:00:47,272
I just spotted my ex.
21
00:00:47,185 --> 00:00:49,585
Um, you know what?
Maybe we should leave.
22
00:00:49,512 --> 00:00:52,211
I don't want this to be awkward
for you.
23
00:00:52,124 --> 00:00:53,357
Jennifer...
24
00:00:53,335 --> 00:00:55,635
I'm not the jealous type.
25
00:00:55,565 --> 00:00:57,831
I'm a secure
and confident guy.
26
00:00:57,763 --> 00:01:00,498
I mean, you do think I'm
confident, don't you?
27
00:01:00,409 --> 00:01:02,075
Of course you are.
28
00:01:02,034 --> 00:01:03,633
So...
29
00:01:03,594 --> 00:01:07,061
Who is it, the eurodude with
too much hair product?
30
00:01:06,940 --> 00:01:09,606
No, uh, over a bit.
31
00:01:09,521 --> 00:01:12,621
It's the scrawny guy next to
the babe in the halter top?
32
00:01:12,515 --> 00:01:15,415
No, it's the babe
in the halter top.
33
00:01:20,576 --> 00:01:24,310
Well, you've got good taste.
34
00:01:47,372 --> 00:01:49,639
Oh, Caitlin,
I have a question for you.
35
00:01:49,571 --> 00:01:52,138
A friend of mine...
let's call him "John"...
36
00:01:52,056 --> 00:01:54,289
is having trouble
with his girlfriend.
37
00:01:54,222 --> 00:01:56,923
Now, John has been
under a lot of stress lately
38
00:01:56,836 --> 00:01:58,969
'cause he's the mayor
of a large city
39
00:01:58,906 --> 00:02:00,573
in the middle of an election.
40
00:02:00,532 --> 00:02:01,632
Sir...
41
00:02:01,615 --> 00:02:03,549
Sir, are you John?
42
00:02:03,495 --> 00:02:04,928
Busted.
43
00:02:04,896 --> 00:02:06,696
Anyway...
44
00:02:06,649 --> 00:02:08,816
Claire thinks that I'm being
selfish
45
00:02:08,751 --> 00:02:11,651
because I insist that we always
stay at my place.
46
00:02:11,556 --> 00:02:13,789
Well, sir?
Sir, if I may suggest...
47
00:02:13,723 --> 00:02:15,923
Carter, please, I need a woman's
perspective.
48
00:02:15,857 --> 00:02:17,457
Well...
49
00:02:17,418 --> 00:02:19,485
Frankly, sir, I think Claire's
right.
50
00:02:19,425 --> 00:02:21,292
You were saying?
51
00:02:21,242 --> 00:02:23,442
Well, sir,
Claire just wants to know
52
00:02:23,377 --> 00:02:24,776
that you're equals
in this relationship.
53
00:02:24,746 --> 00:02:25,947
Just make a gesture.
54
00:02:25,925 --> 00:02:28,025
Let her know you're sensitive
to her feelings.
55
00:02:27,965 --> 00:02:32,798
Carter,
you sure know women.
56
00:02:32,616 --> 00:02:36,883
Walk with me.
57
00:02:36,727 --> 00:02:38,794
Stuart... ahem.
58
00:02:38,734 --> 00:02:41,134
You've had a lot of sexual
experiences, right?
59
00:02:41,059 --> 00:02:43,093
Right.
60
00:02:43,035 --> 00:02:46,702
And some of them have been
with other people?
61
00:02:49,090 --> 00:02:51,889
Some.
62
00:02:51,798 --> 00:02:54,065
I need to talk about
something personal.
63
00:02:53,996 --> 00:02:55,696
Can we do it later?
64
00:02:55,652 --> 00:02:57,886
My mother's gonna be calling
any second.
65
00:02:57,819 --> 00:02:59,586
We haven't talked
in two years.
66
00:02:59,540 --> 00:03:02,573
I found out that Jennifer has
been with a woman.
67
00:03:02,472 --> 00:03:05,071
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
68
00:03:10,214 --> 00:03:12,214
Continue.
69
00:03:12,157 --> 00:03:14,523
Usually, I'd think this type
of thing was cool,
70
00:03:14,450 --> 00:03:16,384
but I don't know,
this is different.
71
00:03:16,331 --> 00:03:18,531
Charlie, I've found there are
three stages
72
00:03:18,466 --> 00:03:19,833
in dating a bisexual woman.
73
00:03:19,804 --> 00:03:24,070
Stage one... cool, great,
loving it.
74
00:03:23,913 --> 00:03:25,280
Stage two...
75
00:03:25,253 --> 00:03:28,320
you start to think
maybe you can't satisfy her
76
00:03:28,216 --> 00:03:29,483
the way a woman can.
77
00:03:29,458 --> 00:03:31,358
Stage three...
78
00:03:31,306 --> 00:03:33,507
you were right.
79
00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:35,573
You're wrong.
80
00:03:35,512 --> 00:03:37,612
Jennifer's totally
into our relationship.
81
00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:40,284
In fact, she invited Caitlin
to dinner tonight
82
00:03:40,195 --> 00:03:42,829
because she wants to get
to know my friends.
83
00:03:42,745 --> 00:03:45,411
So she wants to get to know
84
00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:50,192
your hot, blond, female friend?
85
00:03:50,009 --> 00:03:51,842
Yeah, you got nothing
to worry about.
86
00:03:55,776 --> 00:03:58,542
Hey, Charlie, it was great
seeing you and Jennifer.
87
00:03:58,452 --> 00:04:01,186
She's a real girl's girl.
88
00:04:01,097 --> 00:04:04,330
What do you mean
"girl's girl"?
89
00:04:04,219 --> 00:04:07,319
I don't know, she's the first
woman you've dated
90
00:04:07,215 --> 00:04:09,382
who's shown
any interest in me.
91
00:04:09,318 --> 00:04:12,884
Yeah, well, she sleeps
with me and loves it.
92
00:04:18,972 --> 00:04:21,306
I can't believe this.
93
00:04:21,233 --> 00:04:25,201
A sister Agnes just called me
from Claudia's convent.
94
00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:27,157
Apparently, Claudia wants half
my money
95
00:04:27,096 --> 00:04:28,430
in our divorce settlement.
96
00:04:28,403 --> 00:04:30,369
Why didn't Claudia call you
herself?
97
00:04:30,315 --> 00:04:32,615
When Claudia left me
to become a nun,
98
00:04:32,545 --> 00:04:33,978
she took a vow of silence.
99
00:04:33,946 --> 00:04:36,580
Silence and celibacy...
that's tough.
100
00:04:36,496 --> 00:04:38,695
Yeah, luckily, our marriage
prepared her for both.
101
00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:41,905
She's trying to get
at my nest egg.
102
00:04:41,848 --> 00:04:43,249
I've been saving that money
103
00:04:43,218 --> 00:04:45,351
since I made that cash
at my bar mitzvah.
104
00:04:45,289 --> 00:04:47,056
Paul,
you're not even jewish.
105
00:04:47,011 --> 00:04:48,977
Yeah, well, none of the kids
at my breakdance party
106
00:04:48,923 --> 00:04:50,155
seemed to care.
107
00:04:50,133 --> 00:04:53,600
Oh, the arbitration is
tomorrow. I'm screwed.
108
00:04:53,478 --> 00:04:57,844
I'll say. What judge isn't
gonna favor a nun?
109
00:04:57,683 --> 00:05:00,550
Maybe
the mayor's girlfriend.
110
00:05:00,455 --> 00:05:01,622
Claire is a judge.
111
00:05:01,603 --> 00:05:03,070
She likes the mayor.
112
00:05:03,037 --> 00:05:05,737
The mayor likes me.
Therefore, she likes me.
113
00:05:05,649 --> 00:05:08,382
If she presides over
the arbitration, I'll win!
114
00:05:08,294 --> 00:05:11,394
It's a perfect plan! Paul, the
last time you had a perfect plan,
115
00:05:11,289 --> 00:05:13,790
the paramedics had to pump
quarters out of your stomach.
116
00:05:17,470 --> 00:05:20,504
Sorry I'm late.
I could not get across town.
117
00:05:20,402 --> 00:05:22,534
Oh, do you go through the park
or take 59th street?
118
00:05:22,472 --> 00:05:24,939
I go both ways.
119
00:05:24,862 --> 00:05:28,129
I like to pick one way
and stick with it.
120
00:05:28,017 --> 00:05:29,449
Here, have a seat.
121
00:05:34,198 --> 00:05:37,298
So, have you seen any movies
lately?
122
00:05:37,192 --> 00:05:39,659
I just got "dirty Harry"
on DVD.
123
00:05:39,583 --> 00:05:41,049
It's pretty awesome.
124
00:05:41,016 --> 00:05:42,749
Oh, I hated that movie.
125
00:05:42,705 --> 00:05:43,805
Me too.
126
00:05:43,788 --> 00:05:45,988
It's just two hours
of male bravado.
127
00:05:45,923 --> 00:05:48,223
Stupid movie.
128
00:05:48,153 --> 00:05:50,586
Charlie told me you're not
seeing anyone.
129
00:05:50,510 --> 00:05:53,110
I cannot believe that.
You are so beautiful.
130
00:05:53,027 --> 00:05:55,361
Caitlin's just waiting
for the perfect guy.
131
00:05:55,290 --> 00:05:56,524
Mr. right.
132
00:05:57,870 --> 00:05:59,504
A man.
133
00:05:59,464 --> 00:06:03,064
We ordered some appetizers.
You have to try my calamari.
134
00:06:02,936 --> 00:06:04,936
Mmm!
135
00:06:04,881 --> 00:06:06,647
It's delicious.
136
00:06:06,601 --> 00:06:08,601
Try some more.
137
00:06:08,545 --> 00:06:09,779
Mmm.
138
00:06:11,157 --> 00:06:12,257
Here.
139
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:13,541
Taste mine.
140
00:06:13,515 --> 00:06:16,916
Oh, no, thanks, Charlie.
Um, I don't like ribs.
141
00:06:16,797 --> 00:06:19,130
Stupid ribs.
142
00:06:23,710 --> 00:06:24,811
[LAUGHS]
143
00:06:24,794 --> 00:06:27,461
Well,
don't you look happy.
144
00:06:27,376 --> 00:06:30,276
I'm guessing you got Claire
to preside over your case.
145
00:06:30,179 --> 00:06:32,979
Yep. My money's staying
right where it is...
146
00:06:32,887 --> 00:06:35,587
in a no-interest-bearing
checking account.
147
00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:37,133
Oh, excuse me, ladies!
148
00:06:37,092 --> 00:06:41,092
Do you mind if I read you a
passage from the book of Paul?
149
00:06:40,948 --> 00:06:42,282
I'm not familiar with that.
150
00:06:42,255 --> 00:06:44,355
It's the book
of Paul lassiter.
151
00:06:44,294 --> 00:06:46,194
"And the lord saideth,
152
00:06:46,142 --> 00:06:50,208
'warm up the station wagon,
'cause you're gonna lose.'"
153
00:06:51,973 --> 00:06:53,539
nah.
154
00:06:55,222 --> 00:06:57,689
Great idea, Paul...
heckle the nuns.
155
00:06:57,612 --> 00:06:59,178
[CHUCKLES]
156
00:06:59,141 --> 00:07:00,108
Hello, Claire.
157
00:07:00,097 --> 00:07:01,598
I'm working,
158
00:07:01,563 --> 00:07:03,630
so if you don't mind,
it's "judge Simmons."
159
00:07:03,570 --> 00:07:04,704
Hello, judge Simmons.
160
00:07:04,685 --> 00:07:06,486
Don't "hello" me.
161
00:07:06,438 --> 00:07:10,105
Look, I know that staying over
at the mansion all the time
162
00:07:09,975 --> 00:07:11,775
is very difficult for you,
163
00:07:11,727 --> 00:07:13,994
so I'd like to make
a gesture.
164
00:07:13,925 --> 00:07:17,092
So you're willing to stay over
at my place once in a while?
165
00:07:16,985 --> 00:07:19,884
Oh, God, no.
I got you an overnight bag.
166
00:07:19,788 --> 00:07:21,821
It's a piece of luggage.
167
00:07:21,764 --> 00:07:23,363
That's not a gesture.
168
00:07:23,325 --> 00:07:25,692
It's a parting gift
when you lose on a game show.
169
00:07:25,619 --> 00:07:28,485
It has wheels. See?
170
00:07:28,391 --> 00:07:29,690
This is unbelievable.
171
00:07:29,664 --> 00:07:31,332
You don't know how
to compromise, do you?
172
00:07:32,787 --> 00:07:34,387
I compromise!
173
00:07:34,348 --> 00:07:36,582
When?
You think I enjoy antiquing?
174
00:07:36,515 --> 00:07:39,049
I'm a wealthy man.
I can afford new stuff.
175
00:07:42,856 --> 00:07:45,089
Judge Simmons,
may I just say
176
00:07:45,022 --> 00:07:46,589
that the verdict is in,
177
00:07:46,552 --> 00:07:51,252
and you are guilty
of looking lovely today.
178
00:07:51,076 --> 00:07:54,909
My good friend the mayor
is a very lucky man.
179
00:07:54,772 --> 00:07:56,539
Mr. lassiter...
180
00:07:56,492 --> 00:07:59,093
I hope your opening statement
carries more weight
181
00:07:59,010 --> 00:08:01,176
than that pathetic attempt
at flattery.
182
00:08:01,112 --> 00:08:03,546
T-that was
my opening statement.
183
00:08:10,383 --> 00:08:12,583
I'm so glad Jen invited me
to go out with you guys.
184
00:08:12,519 --> 00:08:16,085
"Jen"?
You call her "Jen"?
185
00:08:15,959 --> 00:08:19,493
What does she call you...
"caity-poo"?
186
00:08:19,369 --> 00:08:22,335
What the hell are you
talking about?
187
00:08:22,237 --> 00:08:25,370
Look, Jennifer
has been with a woman.
188
00:08:25,263 --> 00:08:26,629
She has?
189
00:08:26,601 --> 00:08:29,467
Everyone's done that
except me.
190
00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:32,320
Well, you might have a shot.
191
00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,221
It's obvious she's totally
into you.
192
00:08:35,171 --> 00:08:36,705
It doesn't surprise me,
193
00:08:36,670 --> 00:08:38,269
the way you've been
acting around her.
194
00:08:38,231 --> 00:08:39,331
Are you saying I'm hitting on
your girlfriend?
195
00:08:39,314 --> 00:08:40,914
I wasn't saying that,
196
00:08:40,875 --> 00:08:43,342
but I find it interesting it's
the first place you went.
197
00:08:43,266 --> 00:08:45,266
Hmm?
198
00:08:45,209 --> 00:08:48,509
Just because Jen's been with
girls doesn't mean she wants me.
199
00:08:48,396 --> 00:08:50,362
It's obvious she's crazy
about you.
200
00:08:50,307 --> 00:08:52,573
Ready to go, Charlie?
201
00:08:55,532 --> 00:08:59,098
I'll get us a cab.
202
00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:00,972
Thanks so much
for joining us.
203
00:09:00,917 --> 00:09:02,117
I had a great time.
204
00:09:02,095 --> 00:09:03,663
Me too.
205
00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:20,458
Good morning.
Oh, hey.
206
00:09:20,416 --> 00:09:22,550
You were right about Jen.
207
00:09:22,487 --> 00:09:24,754
She is clearly into me.
208
00:09:24,686 --> 00:09:26,919
As soon as
we got in the cab,
209
00:09:26,852 --> 00:09:28,752
she gave me
the most passionate kiss.
210
00:09:28,699 --> 00:09:30,699
You have no idea.
211
00:09:32,396 --> 00:09:34,663
I have some idea.
212
00:09:34,594 --> 00:09:36,494
It's like somebody
flipped a switch,
213
00:09:36,443 --> 00:09:38,509
and all this sexual energy
was unleashed.
214
00:09:38,450 --> 00:09:40,550
I can still taste
her lip gloss.
215
00:09:40,489 --> 00:09:42,756
It was, uh, papaya or...
216
00:09:42,687 --> 00:09:45,154
Mango?
217
00:09:45,077 --> 00:09:46,244
Yes!
218
00:09:46,224 --> 00:09:47,658
Wait a minute.
219
00:09:47,626 --> 00:09:50,792
How do you know
what she tasted like?
220
00:09:50,684 --> 00:09:52,918
Uh, when we said goodbye,
221
00:09:52,851 --> 00:09:56,385
she kind of gave me
a kiss on the lips.
222
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:58,561
How do you "kind of" give
someone a kiss on the lips?
223
00:09:58,491 --> 00:10:00,159
I probably shouldn't
have said anything.
224
00:10:00,116 --> 00:10:01,483
I'm sure it meant nothing.
225
00:10:01,454 --> 00:10:03,454
No, no, no. No.
Show me the kiss.
226
00:10:03,398 --> 00:10:06,131
Was it like this...
227
00:10:07,221 --> 00:10:11,421
Or like this?
228
00:10:11,268 --> 00:10:13,268
Show me
the second one again.
229
00:10:17,035 --> 00:10:18,768
You getting anything?
230
00:10:18,723 --> 00:10:21,790
No, but I'm surprised
you are.
231
00:10:23,694 --> 00:10:26,261
Some women are just
very affectionate.
232
00:10:26,179 --> 00:10:27,945
Maybe she's
a lip-kisser.
233
00:10:27,900 --> 00:10:30,300
I'm not buying it.
We need a second opinion.
234
00:10:30,226 --> 00:10:31,559
Stuart,
can you get in here?
235
00:10:31,533 --> 00:10:32,698
I'm really swamped
right now.
236
00:10:32,679 --> 00:10:36,313
It's about women
kissing each other.
237
00:10:38,829 --> 00:10:40,795
Stuart,
what would you call a woman
238
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:42,474
who kisses another woman
on the lips?
239
00:10:42,429 --> 00:10:44,262
A lesbian.
240
00:10:45,997 --> 00:10:48,297
What if they were
saying goodbye?
241
00:10:48,228 --> 00:10:52,228
A lesbian
saying goodbye.
242
00:10:52,083 --> 00:10:55,450
What if they're just very fond
of each other as friends
243
00:10:55,333 --> 00:10:58,233
and are expressing
mutual respect and affection?
244
00:10:58,137 --> 00:11:03,870
Everything you just said...
with "lesbian" in front of it.
245
00:11:03,649 --> 00:11:05,215
This is ridiculous!
246
00:11:05,178 --> 00:11:07,144
You know,
if you are so worried,
247
00:11:07,090 --> 00:11:09,290
why don't you just ask her
if she's attracted to me?
248
00:11:09,224 --> 00:11:11,558
Because a relationship
is built on trust.
249
00:11:11,487 --> 00:11:13,120
I really like this woman.
250
00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:15,680
We have so much in common.
She's a lot like me.
251
00:11:15,598 --> 00:11:17,331
So why would she want to
cheat on you?
252
00:11:17,286 --> 00:11:19,086
Because we have
so much in common...
253
00:11:19,038 --> 00:11:20,471
she's a lot like me.
254
00:11:20,439 --> 00:11:22,406
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
255
00:11:22,351 --> 00:11:24,186
Hello?
256
00:11:24,136 --> 00:11:25,736
Oh, hey, Jennifer.
257
00:11:25,697 --> 00:11:28,363
Yeah, sure.
Hold on.
258
00:11:31,719 --> 00:11:33,352
Hey, Jennifer.
259
00:11:33,313 --> 00:11:35,112
A designers' sample sale?
260
00:11:35,065 --> 00:11:38,198
Ooh, do you think they have
knee-high boots?
261
00:11:38,092 --> 00:11:40,192
Okay,
I will meet you there.
262
00:11:40,131 --> 00:11:42,264
You can't go shopping with her.
Why not?
263
00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,534
Because she's going
to get you alone,
264
00:11:43,508 --> 00:11:44,808
put you
in some tight clothes,
265
00:11:44,783 --> 00:11:46,382
and then try
to get you out of them.
266
00:11:46,343 --> 00:11:48,310
What makes you think
she'd do that?
267
00:11:48,255 --> 00:11:50,289
'Cause that's what
I would do.
268
00:11:53,990 --> 00:11:55,624
Answer me this...
269
00:11:55,584 --> 00:11:57,883
if nuns take
a vow of poverty,
270
00:11:57,813 --> 00:12:00,447
what do they need
m money for?
271
00:12:00,363 --> 00:12:03,562
Sister Claudia would like to use
the money to clothe the needy,
272
00:12:03,453 --> 00:12:05,520
feed the hungry,
shelter the homeless,
273
00:12:05,460 --> 00:12:08,261
and provide medicine
for the sick.
274
00:12:08,170 --> 00:12:10,302
That's very admirable.
275
00:12:10,239 --> 00:12:12,773
And what would you do
with the money, Mr. lassiter?
276
00:12:14,191 --> 00:12:15,691
The same.
277
00:12:17,282 --> 00:12:21,548
God, being in a relationship
with a woman is so difficult.
278
00:12:21,392 --> 00:12:22,958
How do you deal with it,
Carter?
279
00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:27,053
I date men.
280
00:12:26,999 --> 00:12:29,699
That'll be my fallback.
281
00:12:29,612 --> 00:12:31,345
Sir?
Mm-hmm.
282
00:12:31,301 --> 00:12:33,035
Claire is killing me
with this arbitration.
283
00:12:32,990 --> 00:12:34,189
She's mean,
she's vindictive.
284
00:12:34,168 --> 00:12:35,969
She's like a black widow
circling her prey.
285
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:37,120
What's your point?
286
00:12:37,100 --> 00:12:38,866
I like her.
287
00:12:38,819 --> 00:12:40,220
I think you should
get back together with her.
288
00:12:40,190 --> 00:12:42,090
Forget it.
I'm not making up with her.
289
00:12:42,038 --> 00:12:45,405
Sir, a little compromise in a
relationship never hurt anybody.
290
00:12:45,289 --> 00:12:47,289
Destroyed my marriage
with Helen.
291
00:12:47,232 --> 00:12:48,765
She won our first argument,
292
00:12:48,729 --> 00:12:51,596
and for the next 20 years
she had the upper hand.
293
00:12:51,501 --> 00:12:53,468
What was
the argument about?
294
00:12:53,413 --> 00:12:54,914
Who would have
the upper hand.
295
00:12:56,313 --> 00:12:58,213
She never respected me
after that.
296
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,594
I am not going to let this
happen with Claire.
297
00:13:00,518 --> 00:13:01,851
Mnh-mnh.
298
00:13:01,824 --> 00:13:03,525
It's a matter
of principle.
299
00:13:03,482 --> 00:13:04,715
But, sir,
I have no principles.
300
00:13:04,692 --> 00:13:06,359
Why should I
have to suffer?
301
00:13:08,070 --> 00:13:10,436
Every cause
needs a martyr, Paul...
302
00:13:10,363 --> 00:13:13,664
And you're mine.
303
00:13:13,550 --> 00:13:17,817
I don't care if you wind up
on the street selling pencils.
304
00:13:17,660 --> 00:13:19,560
That's how much
this means to me.
305
00:13:19,508 --> 00:13:21,040
Oh, God.
306
00:13:21,005 --> 00:13:22,439
Sir, if you care
about Claire,
307
00:13:22,408 --> 00:13:24,108
you have to move beyond
your first marriage.
308
00:13:24,064 --> 00:13:26,264
She shouldn't have to pay
for what Helen did to you.
309
00:13:26,199 --> 00:13:28,265
He's right.
Come on, be a pal.
310
00:13:28,207 --> 00:13:30,673
If Claire stays mad at you,
I'm gonna lose,
311
00:13:30,595 --> 00:13:33,462
and if I lose, I gotta give
Claudia a lot of money.
312
00:13:33,367 --> 00:13:35,101
How much
are we talking here?
313
00:13:38,115 --> 00:13:39,749
You add a zero,
314
00:13:39,709 --> 00:13:41,909
that's what I pay Helen
every month.
315
00:13:44,106 --> 00:13:46,805
She seeing anyone?
316
00:13:52,103 --> 00:13:54,969
Oh, look.
317
00:13:54,875 --> 00:13:56,341
I snagged
the last cashmere...
318
00:13:56,308 --> 00:13:58,275
I saw that first.
319
00:13:58,220 --> 00:14:00,287
I'll get it back...
there's no way she's a size 2.
320
00:14:00,227 --> 00:14:04,594
Wow... you look
really sexy in that top.
321
00:14:04,434 --> 00:14:06,966
Oh.
322
00:14:06,886 --> 00:14:08,653
How 'bout now?
323
00:14:08,608 --> 00:14:10,074
Hmm. Still sexy.
324
00:14:10,041 --> 00:14:12,974
I'm not gonna get it.
325
00:14:12,877 --> 00:14:14,344
Do you mind
if I try it on?
326
00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:16,078
Sure.
327
00:14:18,293 --> 00:14:21,326
Oh, I'm really glad
you invited me here.
328
00:14:21,224 --> 00:14:23,257
Yeah, it's fun,
isn't it?
329
00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:25,500
Oh!
330
00:14:25,430 --> 00:14:26,697
Oh.
331
00:14:27,756 --> 00:14:28,889
I...
332
00:14:28,871 --> 00:14:31,138
Saw this in "vogue."
333
00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:33,571
I like it.
334
00:14:33,491 --> 00:14:36,225
Let's see...
335
00:14:36,136 --> 00:14:37,603
Hmm.
336
00:14:37,569 --> 00:14:39,769
How do my boobs look
in this shirt?
337
00:14:39,705 --> 00:14:41,304
I don't know.
338
00:14:41,265 --> 00:14:44,199
Um, I-I didn't even
notice you had boobs.
339
00:14:44,101 --> 00:14:47,535
You know who you should ask?
Men. Men love boobs.
340
00:14:47,415 --> 00:14:49,649
Damn,
this button's stuck.
341
00:14:49,582 --> 00:14:51,349
Can you give me a hand?
342
00:14:51,302 --> 00:14:52,701
Okay...
343
00:14:52,672 --> 00:14:54,705
I-I can't do this
anymore.
344
00:14:54,647 --> 00:14:58,315
Uh, Jen, it... it seems
that you're attracted to me.
345
00:14:58,184 --> 00:15:01,884
And while I am flattered
and I do like you very much,
346
00:15:01,753 --> 00:15:03,753
it's just...
it's not in that way.
347
00:15:03,697 --> 00:15:07,096
Caitlin,
I'm not attracted to you.
348
00:15:06,977 --> 00:15:08,977
Oh.
349
00:15:08,922 --> 00:15:11,556
Want to look for handbags?
350
00:15:11,471 --> 00:15:14,104
What is going on?
351
00:15:14,019 --> 00:15:15,652
I'm... I'm sorry.
352
00:15:15,613 --> 00:15:18,013
You know, I never should
have jumped to conclusions.
353
00:15:17,939 --> 00:15:20,039
It's just that Charlie
got into my head.
354
00:15:19,978 --> 00:15:21,578
Charlie?
What did he tell you?
355
00:15:21,539 --> 00:15:24,439
Well, he said that you had
a relationship with a woman,
356
00:15:24,342 --> 00:15:28,976
and I guess I got a little paranoid
after you kissed me, so...
357
00:15:28,804 --> 00:15:31,904
That's how I say goodbye.
I'm just a lip-kisser.
358
00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:35,299
Believe me, Caitlin,
I am in no way attracted to you.
359
00:15:35,176 --> 00:15:38,343
Yeah, I heard you
the first time.
360
00:15:38,235 --> 00:15:41,901
I just cannot believe
Charlie doesn't trust me.
361
00:15:41,772 --> 00:15:43,338
Oh, don't blame this
all on him.
362
00:15:43,300 --> 00:15:46,135
He was just thrown by your past.
He's really a good guy.
363
00:15:46,041 --> 00:15:47,907
He trusts you
more than you think.
364
00:15:51,808 --> 00:15:53,941
Hey.
365
00:15:53,878 --> 00:15:57,245
What are you guys doing
in casuals?
366
00:15:57,129 --> 00:15:59,262
You are unbelievable.
367
00:16:00,315 --> 00:16:01,748
[SIGHS]
368
00:16:01,716 --> 00:16:03,150
Excuse me...
369
00:16:03,119 --> 00:16:06,153
Do you think this top
is too revealing?
370
00:16:06,050 --> 00:16:09,117
No.
371
00:16:11,881 --> 00:16:15,014
Claire, can we talk?
372
00:16:14,907 --> 00:16:17,807
Oh, look at the tissues.
Have you been crying?
373
00:16:17,711 --> 00:16:20,045
No, those are Paul's.
374
00:16:21,377 --> 00:16:22,542
What do you want?
375
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,556
Well, I-I want you
to have this.
376
00:16:24,497 --> 00:16:27,464
Didn't I already tell you
where you can put that?
377
00:16:27,365 --> 00:16:30,699
Yes, but I was pretty sure
it would void the warranty.
378
00:16:30,584 --> 00:16:33,283
Open it.
379
00:16:35,267 --> 00:16:36,867
These are your things.
380
00:16:36,828 --> 00:16:39,529
I'm gonna need them
if I stay at your place tonight.
381
00:16:39,441 --> 00:16:42,074
I really appreciate this.
382
00:16:41,991 --> 00:16:44,258
Oh, and tonight, um,
383
00:16:44,189 --> 00:16:47,156
you'll be doing
more than sleeping.
384
00:16:47,057 --> 00:16:50,090
Oh, that's good...
you got your cable fixed.
385
00:16:52,090 --> 00:16:54,824
Claire, Claire, Claire, Claire...
What?
386
00:16:54,735 --> 00:16:56,936
You mean everything to me,
and I realize
387
00:16:56,869 --> 00:16:59,670
that the only way that this
relationship is gonna work
388
00:16:59,578 --> 00:17:01,311
is if I stop being
so selfish.
389
00:17:01,267 --> 00:17:03,233
Ohh...
390
00:17:03,179 --> 00:17:05,045
My favorite chocolates.
391
00:17:04,995 --> 00:17:08,295
Those are mine.
392
00:17:08,181 --> 00:17:10,948
Well, it's, uh, almost time
to start up again,
393
00:17:10,857 --> 00:17:12,623
so I'm gonna see you
tonight.
394
00:17:12,578 --> 00:17:14,578
[GIGGLES]
395
00:17:14,521 --> 00:17:17,022
Would you mind being
a little easier on Paul?
396
00:17:16,942 --> 00:17:18,843
He's not such a bad guy.
397
00:17:18,791 --> 00:17:20,591
Ah, there's my buddy now!
398
00:17:20,543 --> 00:17:21,909
Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa.
399
00:17:21,881 --> 00:17:24,781
"Buddy" is
a little strong,
400
00:17:24,685 --> 00:17:27,152
don't you think?
401
00:17:27,075 --> 00:17:28,607
Judge Simmons...
402
00:17:28,572 --> 00:17:30,839
I'm afraid I have given you
the impression
403
00:17:30,771 --> 00:17:32,471
that the mayor and I
are close.
404
00:17:32,427 --> 00:17:33,928
We are not.
405
00:17:33,894 --> 00:17:38,094
Like you, I find him
to be selfish, stubborn,
406
00:17:37,941 --> 00:17:40,073
and a bad lover.
407
00:17:41,732 --> 00:17:47,432
I've left enough women
unsatisfied to know the look.
408
00:17:47,212 --> 00:17:50,645
Paul, Claire and I
are back together again.
409
00:17:50,525 --> 00:17:54,759
Oh, why do you hate me?!
410
00:17:59,606 --> 00:18:01,339
I can't believe Charlie.
411
00:18:01,294 --> 00:18:03,894
I tell him I've been with
one woman, and he freaks out.
412
00:18:03,811 --> 00:18:05,845
I know... I was judged
the same way in college
413
00:18:05,787 --> 00:18:07,655
when people found out
I was with two guys.
414
00:18:07,603 --> 00:18:10,370
Really?
How did that happen?
415
00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:13,113
Well, I was with Joe
until I was a sophomore,
416
00:18:13,020 --> 00:18:15,987
and then I dated Dave
my junior and senior years.
417
00:18:21,815 --> 00:18:22,980
Charlie,
why are you wearing that?
418
00:18:22,961 --> 00:18:25,628
I put my coat down
for one second,
419
00:18:25,541 --> 00:18:27,408
and some woman bought it.
420
00:18:27,358 --> 00:18:29,858
I'm not gonna freeze
out there.
421
00:18:29,779 --> 00:18:31,213
They took your shirt, too?
422
00:18:31,181 --> 00:18:33,315
No, this is mine.
423
00:18:34,398 --> 00:18:35,765
Jennifer...
424
00:18:35,738 --> 00:18:38,337
I shouldn't have followed you
to that store.
425
00:18:38,254 --> 00:18:39,888
It was
a dumb thing to do.
426
00:18:39,848 --> 00:18:41,214
I know. It was ridiculous
for me to think
427
00:18:41,185 --> 00:18:43,185
you could ever be
attracted to Caitlin.
428
00:18:43,129 --> 00:18:45,830
Yeah,
we covered that.
429
00:18:45,743 --> 00:18:47,609
Charlie, I shared
something personal with you
430
00:18:47,559 --> 00:18:48,992
because I trusted you,
431
00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:51,460
and you assumed I'm
some sex-crazed nympho
432
00:18:51,382 --> 00:18:53,549
who's going to cheat on you
with Caitlin...
433
00:18:53,484 --> 00:18:55,385
a woman you call
your best friend?
434
00:18:55,333 --> 00:18:56,866
I mean, really.
435
00:18:56,830 --> 00:18:58,930
That is the lamest,
most pathetic...
436
00:18:58,869 --> 00:19:01,302
you call me
your best friend?
437
00:19:01,226 --> 00:19:03,627
Ohh.
438
00:19:03,553 --> 00:19:04,786
I want you to know
439
00:19:04,764 --> 00:19:06,864
that our relationship
means the world to me.
440
00:19:06,803 --> 00:19:09,503
Oh, well, it means
a lot to me, too.
441
00:19:09,415 --> 00:19:11,582
I'm gonna go.
442
00:19:13,398 --> 00:19:16,331
Best friend. Mm.
443
00:19:17,955 --> 00:19:20,354
Jennifer, I'm just not used to
being in a relationship
444
00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:22,181
with a woman that has
your dating history.
445
00:19:22,129 --> 00:19:23,795
How do you think I feel?
446
00:19:23,753 --> 00:19:25,954
I mean, just yesterday
Stuart was going on
447
00:19:25,889 --> 00:19:28,222
about all the "Bettys"
you've hooked up with.
448
00:19:28,150 --> 00:19:30,350
For your information,
I've only been with five.
449
00:19:30,286 --> 00:19:31,719
You've only been
with five women?
450
00:19:31,688 --> 00:19:34,221
Only five named Betty.
451
00:19:34,140 --> 00:19:36,973
[SIGHS]
452
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:38,680
Usually I'm not
the jealous type,
453
00:19:38,633 --> 00:19:41,499
but I don't know how to compete
with a whole other gender.
454
00:19:41,404 --> 00:19:44,038
I was worried you'd start
missing what I don't have.
455
00:19:43,954 --> 00:19:46,453
I mean, my skin isn't that soft.
I don't smell that great.
456
00:19:46,375 --> 00:19:47,642
Yes, you do.
457
00:19:47,618 --> 00:19:49,518
I know.
458
00:19:49,466 --> 00:19:51,700
You want to
get out of here?
459
00:19:51,633 --> 00:19:54,033
Sure.
460
00:20:00,171 --> 00:20:01,171
Bitch.
461
00:20:06,099 --> 00:20:09,164
Forgive me, father,
for I have sinned.
462
00:20:09,061 --> 00:20:12,561
It's been a number of decades
since my last confession.
463
00:20:12,439 --> 00:20:15,505
Since that time,
I've staged a fake bar mitzvah,
464
00:20:15,402 --> 00:20:17,502
taken the lord's name
in vain,
465
00:20:17,441 --> 00:20:19,841
and I moved
a sizable amount of money
466
00:20:19,766 --> 00:20:21,367
into a Swiss bank account
467
00:20:21,328 --> 00:20:24,028
to keep it out of the hands
of my ex-wife,
468
00:20:23,941 --> 00:20:25,841
who is now a nun.
469
00:20:26,553 --> 00:20:28,853
Gotcha.
470
00:21:25,489 --> 00:21:26,621
Sit, ubu, sit.Good dog.
471
00:21:26,622 --> 00:21:27,823
(Barking)
472
00:21:27,824 --> 00:21:30,291
Moo.
473
00:21:30,341 --> 00:21:34,891
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
33571
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.