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My name is Alex Riley,
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and this is the story of my life.
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Now, in order for you to
get the complete picture,
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I should probably start with...
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- ...the day that changed everything.
- _
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As an only child growing up in Chicago,
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I had two major obsessions:
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one was inventing stuff...
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[upbeat music]
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[objects rattling]
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The other was Michael Jordan.
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Jordan takes the fallaway, and...
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But like I said,
all that was about to change.
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Hey, honey.
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You know that pilot I've been seeing?
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The one from LA? What about him?
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He asked me to marry him.
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And what did you say?
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? ?
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00:00:35,772 --> 00:00:37,272
And just like that,
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I was forced to live in a house
full of complete strangers...
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A house that happened to be
smack-dab in the middle of...
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Laker country.
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Turns out that wouldn't be
the worst day of my life.
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- Not by a long shot.
- _
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Abby.
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Learn a lot today, okay?
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Dad?
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Where's my lunch?
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Oh, boy.
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Leaving my daughter's
lunch on the kitchen table
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isn't the bad thing I was talking about.
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[tires screech]
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Sarah! Sarah?
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Sarah!
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This is.
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Sarah!
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[rhythmic rustling]
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[rustling stops]
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Well, at least
when life hits rock bottom,
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things can't get any worse, right?
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- Wrong.
- _
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When you're ranking life-changing days,
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it's hard to top the one
where you almost died.
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[grunting]
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? ?
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But our life stories aren't defined
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by the things that happen to us.
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They're defined by how we
choose to deal with them.
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? ?
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I'll admit I have dealt with some things
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better than others.
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Ugh!
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[dog barking]
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? ?
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- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
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Rise and shine, little bro.
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Don't want to be late for school,
little bro.
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You think you could
stop calling me that?
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Why? When my dad marries your mom,
we're legally gonna be bros.
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Step-bros.
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But I'm actually talking
about the word "little".
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I mean, we're in the same grade.
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Yeah, I'm 39 days older,
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and that's a responsibility
I don't take lightly.
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Here.
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I picked out your first
day of school outfit.
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Thanks?
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But I got my own clothes.
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Oh. Okay.
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I just... thought
it'd be a good color on you.
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? ?
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Hope it tastes okay.
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00:02:53,930 --> 00:02:55,163
In Chicago, it was just the two of us,
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so we mostly did takeout.
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Yeah, by mostly,
she means every single meal.
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That's all right, Maggie.
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00:03:02,172 --> 00:03:04,839
All I need for breakfast
is my morning coffee...
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00:03:04,841 --> 00:03:06,941
along with a little sugar.
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00:03:08,044 --> 00:03:09,978
I'll take my breakfast to go.
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00:03:09,980 --> 00:03:11,813
Yeah, I think
I just lost my appetite forever.
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Whoa.
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That sucker's always
been a little wobbly.
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Just slip that napkin back
under the leg there, would you?
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Actually, I think I got
something a little bit better.
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The Alex Riley Adjustable Table Wedge.
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Patent pending.
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It works on the same
principle as a car jack.
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Here, let's give it a try.
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[device clacking]
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Sweet, I can eat with both hands again.
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You should bring your wedge
to school, honey.
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It's a great conversation starter.
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Eh! Wrong.
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Your school identity's locked
in during the first week,
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and we can't let Little Bro's identity
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be "inventor nerd".
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00:03:42,912 --> 00:03:45,847
Well, I'm just happy to have
a nerd living under my roof.
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You nerds are taking over the world.
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00:03:47,484 --> 00:03:48,850
Who knows, you may just grow up
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to be one of those famous inventors
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like that dweeb who started Microsoft.
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- Bill Gates?
- No, that's not it.
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Pretty sure his name's Gene.
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00:03:56,860 --> 00:03:58,726
Well, when I grow up,
I'm gonna come up with an idea
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00:03:58,728 --> 00:04:00,862
that'll change the world.
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The following occurs every day
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in Japanese restaurants across America.
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Mmm. This sushi looks so good!
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00:04:07,971 --> 00:04:09,504
Oh, no!
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I accidentally dropped another piece
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of expensive sushi onto the floor.
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00:04:13,576 --> 00:04:15,943
But that is a thing of the past,
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thanks to... the Switch-Fork.
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00:04:22,118 --> 00:04:23,151
Yum!
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00:04:23,153 --> 00:04:25,253
Arigato, Switch-Fork!
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Mm-hmm!
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_
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Okay, so it wasn't the idea
that'll change the world.
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00:04:34,764 --> 00:04:36,064
We'll get 'em next time, right?
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? ?
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00:04:38,401 --> 00:04:40,068
What the hell's wrong with you?
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I'm trying to eat healthy,
so I order salad,
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but when my food comes,
I instantly regret it,
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so I steal your fries.
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I thought it was our thing.
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Okay.
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00:04:47,177 --> 00:04:48,910
"Tough love from your CFO" time.
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In the past year,
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Riley Industries has gone
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from an annual revenue of 2.3 million
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00:04:53,349 --> 00:04:54,749
to pretty much zero.
133
00:04:54,751 --> 00:04:56,150
Okay, define "pretty much".
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00:04:56,152 --> 00:04:57,785
Zero.
135
00:04:57,787 --> 00:04:59,954
Now it's tough love time
from your best friend.
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Dude, your life's a mess.
137
00:05:01,558 --> 00:05:03,357
- Okay, define "mess".
- Sarah got the house.
138
00:05:03,359 --> 00:05:04,792
Yeah, but I got to keep my patents.
139
00:05:04,794 --> 00:05:05,860
You're living in my garage.
140
00:05:05,862 --> 00:05:06,618
Rent-free.
141
00:05:06,664 --> 00:05:08,754
- So I longer have a man cave.
- No, you do.
142
00:05:08,765 --> 00:05:10,368
There's just another man living in it.
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And now you only see Abby twice a week.
144
00:05:14,304 --> 00:05:17,505
Look, I know it's only been
six months since the divorce,
145
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but you gotta get it together.
146
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I have inventor's block, okay?
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It's not that easy to get over.
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Sure it is.
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00:05:23,179 --> 00:05:24,879
You just gotta get your mind right.
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00:05:24,881 --> 00:05:26,581
Try what I do.
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Every night before bed,
I visualize my future.
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Jasmine will be grown,
so Wendy and I will move
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to a secluded island
where our only worry
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is keeping the Caribbean sand
out of our pi�a coladas.
155
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That is some vivid imagery, man.
156
00:05:38,595 --> 00:05:41,062
Keep explaining that with
your eyes firmly closed.
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Ooh, I got a lot of fries.
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Alex, seriously.
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What's your life gonna look
like 25 years from now?
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? ?
161
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Riley takes the ball away!
162
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Good! Bulls win!
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Dad wasn't able to make it
for your first day back,
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but he sent this instead.
165
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What? [laughs]
166
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Caribbean sand.
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Well, I hope
he's enjoying his pi�a colada.
168
00:06:02,085 --> 00:06:04,152
When he called, he did sound wasted.
169
00:06:04,154 --> 00:06:06,087
Yeah. Oh, speaking of.
170
00:06:06,089 --> 00:06:08,389
Do me a favor, Jasmine...
At some point today,
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would you gather the staff?
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I have a... a...
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sort of a big announcement to make.
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Gather the staff. What a good idea.
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Why didn't I think of
doing something like that?
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- All: Surprise!
- _
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You're very quick.
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Abby. What are you doing here?
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The Bulls have a game tonight.
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- Dad, you look great.
- Hey.
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I just flew in for an hour
before I head up to Sacramento.
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Is that okay?
I don't want you getting in trouble.
183
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I'm the GM. I can do whatever I want.
184
00:06:32,982 --> 00:06:34,682
Except make you head coach.
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Fine. Keep running a stagnant offense.
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See if I care.
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Okay, Alex,
what's your big announcement?
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Ah, um... so...
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I'm retiring.
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Effective immediately.
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? ?
192
00:06:48,131 --> 00:06:50,097
Surprise.
193
00:06:50,099 --> 00:06:51,599
So, what are you working on?
194
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Ideas for your identity-creating moment.
195
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It can be anything so long
as it's big and memorable.
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How comfortable are
you with public nudity?
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I understand how you
want me to be popular.
198
00:07:01,511 --> 00:07:02,258
You know, I get it,
199
00:07:02,279 --> 00:07:04,412
but I've never really
been into the whole
200
00:07:04,414 --> 00:07:06,113
"having a ton of friends" thing.
201
00:07:06,115 --> 00:07:07,849
Who doesn't want to
have a ton of friends?
202
00:07:07,851 --> 00:07:10,685
Me? As explicitly expressed
in my last sentence?
203
00:07:10,687 --> 00:07:13,688
Okay, look, Justin,
I really appreciate all the...
204
00:07:13,690 --> 00:07:17,325
? There she goes ?
205
00:07:17,327 --> 00:07:21,329
? There she goes again ?
206
00:07:21,331 --> 00:07:23,231
? Racing through ?
207
00:07:23,233 --> 00:07:24,832
Did everything just go
slo-mo for a second there?
208
00:07:24,834 --> 00:07:26,434
Nori Sterling.
209
00:07:26,436 --> 00:07:28,603
Yeah, she has
that effect on guys at first.
210
00:07:28,605 --> 00:07:29,647
But you'll get over it.
211
00:07:29,706 --> 00:07:32,039
And I'm gonna see her
every day at this bus stop?
212
00:07:32,041 --> 00:07:33,708
You'll see her,
but that's as far as it'll go.
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00:07:33,710 --> 00:07:35,142
She only dates high school guys.
214
00:07:35,144 --> 00:07:36,510
She's never gonna actually speak...
215
00:07:36,512 --> 00:07:37,511
Hey, Justin.
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00:07:37,513 --> 00:07:38,980
Both: Uh...
217
00:07:38,982 --> 00:07:40,047
You must be Justin's step-brother.
218
00:07:40,049 --> 00:07:42,583
My parents told me there's a
new kid in the neighborhood.
219
00:07:42,585 --> 00:07:43,651
Yup. Completely new.
220
00:07:43,653 --> 00:07:44,752
Just moved in yesterday.
221
00:07:44,754 --> 00:07:45,887
Could not be any newer.
222
00:07:45,889 --> 00:07:47,755
I'm gonna stop talking now.
223
00:07:47,757 --> 00:07:49,957
Well, welcome to the bus stop.
224
00:07:49,959 --> 00:07:51,525
[gasps]
225
00:07:51,527 --> 00:07:53,294
Here, let me get that for you.
226
00:07:53,296 --> 00:07:55,129
The Extendo-Grab 5000.
227
00:07:55,131 --> 00:07:56,330
Patent pending.
228
00:07:56,332 --> 00:07:58,499
And he's Inventor Nerd.
229
00:08:01,070 --> 00:08:02,470
There you go.
230
00:08:02,472 --> 00:08:04,071
Thanks.
231
00:08:04,073 --> 00:08:05,172
I'm Nori.
232
00:08:05,174 --> 00:08:06,607
I'm Alex.
233
00:08:06,609 --> 00:08:09,210
? There she goes ?
234
00:08:09,212 --> 00:08:12,146
[The La's' "There She Goes"
playing over stereo]
235
00:08:12,148 --> 00:08:14,615
Whenever I hear this song,
it makes me think of a girl.
236
00:08:14,617 --> 00:08:16,984
- Mommy?
- No.
237
00:08:16,986 --> 00:08:19,620
No, Mommy's song is "Psycho Killer".
238
00:08:19,622 --> 00:08:21,956
Daddy, can I ask you
something important?
239
00:08:21,958 --> 00:08:23,457
Of course, Abby,
you can talk to me about anything.
240
00:08:23,459 --> 00:08:24,959
I mean, unless it's ladies stuff,
241
00:08:24,961 --> 00:08:27,328
'cause... I am not ready for that yet.
242
00:08:27,330 --> 00:08:28,996
Are you 100% positive
243
00:08:28,998 --> 00:08:31,165
that Michael Jordan was
the best player ever?
244
00:08:31,167 --> 00:08:32,767
Absolutely.
245
00:08:32,769 --> 00:08:34,669
I mean, why do you even have to ask?
246
00:08:34,671 --> 00:08:36,704
'Cause kids at school
were saying Kobe's better.
247
00:08:36,706 --> 00:08:39,440
Okay, and that is why...
say it with me...
248
00:08:39,442 --> 00:08:42,343
Both: Lakers fans are stupid.
249
00:08:42,345 --> 00:08:44,445
[laughing]
250
00:08:45,381 --> 00:08:46,447
Wait, why is there a "for sale" sign
251
00:08:46,449 --> 00:08:47,348
in front of the house?
252
00:08:47,350 --> 00:08:53,654
? ?
253
00:08:55,425 --> 00:08:57,220
Abby, honey,
why don't you go play inside, okay?
254
00:08:57,255 --> 00:08:58,291
I don't want to.
255
00:08:58,294 --> 00:08:59,418
Okay, what your mother's trying to say
256
00:08:59,496 --> 00:09:00,972
is that Mommy and I are
gonna yell at each other.
257
00:09:01,031 --> 00:09:02,897
Oh. I'll be inside.
258
00:09:02,899 --> 00:09:04,665
Care to explain?
259
00:09:04,667 --> 00:09:06,734
Well, you know the chef
I've been dating?
260
00:09:06,736 --> 00:09:08,978
The guy with the place on Melrose?
Yeah, what about him?
261
00:09:09,038 --> 00:09:10,147
He asked me to marry him.
262
00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:11,079
What did you say?
263
00:09:11,107 --> 00:09:12,693
Oh. Duh.
264
00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:14,775
He's opening a second
location in San Francisco,
265
00:09:14,777 --> 00:09:17,345
so we're moving in a week. [groans]
266
00:09:17,347 --> 00:09:19,213
Honestly, Sarah,
I can't believe you're willing
267
00:09:19,215 --> 00:09:22,049
to leave Abby behind
for some random chef.
268
00:09:22,051 --> 00:09:23,718
I'm not leaving Abby behind.
269
00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:26,988
She's coming to San Francisco with me.
270
00:09:32,229 --> 00:09:33,728
Look, you're crazy if you
think I'm gonna let you
271
00:09:33,730 --> 00:09:35,530
take Abby 400 miles away from here.
272
00:09:35,532 --> 00:09:36,865
Okay, I don't want to be
pulling her out of school
273
00:09:36,867 --> 00:09:37,999
and away from her friends either,
274
00:09:38,001 --> 00:09:39,167
but what's the alternative?
275
00:09:39,169 --> 00:09:40,268
I mean, you live in a garage.
276
00:09:40,270 --> 00:09:41,903
It's a two-car garage!
277
00:09:41,905 --> 00:09:44,003
How can you expect to
take care of her full-time
278
00:09:44,038 --> 00:09:45,268
and you can't even
take care of yourself?
279
00:09:45,303 --> 00:09:47,374
Well, I... it's... hmm.
280
00:09:47,386 --> 00:09:48,886
Look, I just need one sale
281
00:09:48,888 --> 00:09:49,987
and everything will turn around, okay?
282
00:09:49,989 --> 00:09:53,390
- It's... it's like...
- Please don't tell me
283
00:09:53,392 --> 00:09:54,635
you're gonna use a basketball metaphor.
284
00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:56,493
It's like in basketball, okay?
285
00:09:56,495 --> 00:09:58,729
If a player isn't
hitting from the outside,
286
00:09:58,731 --> 00:10:00,670
the coach will draw him up
a play to get him a layup,
287
00:10:00,705 --> 00:10:02,413
and once he sees the
ball go through the hoop,
288
00:10:02,448 --> 00:10:03,914
he gets his confidence back,
289
00:10:03,949 --> 00:10:05,499
and then his shots start falling again.
290
00:10:05,958 --> 00:10:07,404
- Which one is a layup?
- [groans]
291
00:10:07,436 --> 00:10:09,072
Okay, see, this is why we didn't work.
292
00:10:09,114 --> 00:10:10,413
I mean, that,
and your complete disregard
293
00:10:10,415 --> 00:10:11,881
for the sanctity of our vows.
294
00:10:11,883 --> 00:10:12,916
You really feel like you're that close
295
00:10:12,918 --> 00:10:14,484
to turning it around?
296
00:10:14,486 --> 00:10:15,752
I just gotta hit a layup.
297
00:10:15,754 --> 00:10:17,190
Okay? It'll be a piece of cake.
298
00:10:17,289 --> 00:10:19,355
Mom, can I have
a piece of cake for dessert?
299
00:10:19,424 --> 00:10:21,157
Sure, but you have to order
a salad with your burger
300
00:10:21,159 --> 00:10:22,289
instead of fries.
301
00:10:22,394 --> 00:10:24,361
You can sneak some of my fries,
Little B.
302
00:10:24,363 --> 00:10:25,895
It'll be our thing.
303
00:10:25,897 --> 00:10:27,764
I don't really want a thing.
I just want...
304
00:10:27,766 --> 00:10:31,101
? There she goes ?
305
00:10:31,103 --> 00:10:33,370
- Nori.
- [music stops]
306
00:10:33,372 --> 00:10:34,971
You're still seeing her in slo-mo?
307
00:10:34,973 --> 00:10:36,840
Dude, I told you, she's never gonna...
308
00:10:36,842 --> 00:10:38,375
? There she goes again ?
309
00:10:38,377 --> 00:10:39,642
Oh, man, she's waving at you.
310
00:10:39,644 --> 00:10:41,344
She's waving at me.
311
00:10:41,346 --> 00:10:43,780
Do you realize how huge this is?
312
00:10:43,782 --> 00:10:45,081
First, a bus stop hello.
313
00:10:45,083 --> 00:10:46,649
Now a public wave?
314
00:10:46,651 --> 00:10:48,618
That can only mean one thing.
315
00:10:48,620 --> 00:10:50,553
Nori Sterling's into you.
316
00:10:50,555 --> 00:10:52,756
I thought she only
dated high school boys.
317
00:10:52,758 --> 00:10:55,558
I just figured out what your
school identity's gonna be.
318
00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:57,093
There's a dance on Friday night.
319
00:10:57,095 --> 00:10:58,628
Everyone will be there. It's perfect.
320
00:10:58,630 --> 00:10:59,729
Perfect for what?
321
00:10:59,731 --> 00:11:01,598
The birth...
322
00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:03,266
[whispering] ...of a legend.
323
00:11:03,268 --> 00:11:06,169
Friday night,
in front of the whole school,
324
00:11:06,171 --> 00:11:08,972
you're gonna kiss Nori Sterling.
325
00:11:08,974 --> 00:11:11,975
[wistful music]
326
00:11:12,504 --> 00:11:14,344
Hey. How's it comin'?
327
00:11:14,346 --> 00:11:15,345
Terrible.
328
00:11:15,347 --> 00:11:17,814
Ah, dude, come on.
I'm sure it's not that bad.
329
00:11:17,816 --> 00:11:19,149
Is that a wheel?
330
00:11:19,151 --> 00:11:20,450
Yeah, I was trying to reinvent it.
331
00:11:20,452 --> 00:11:21,606
Turns out you can't.
332
00:11:21,621 --> 00:11:24,054
- Okay, I'm taking that book.
- Careful, that's important.
333
00:11:24,056 --> 00:11:25,008
And you're not getting it back
334
00:11:25,024 --> 00:11:27,032
until we get your mind
right once and for all.
335
00:11:27,126 --> 00:11:28,992
Now, your happy place can be anything.
336
00:11:28,994 --> 00:11:31,628
Just pick someplace nice and peaceful.
337
00:11:31,630 --> 00:11:32,595
[birds chirping]
338
00:11:32,597 --> 00:11:33,730
[sighs]
339
00:11:33,732 --> 00:11:35,365
[upbeat calypso music]
340
00:11:35,367 --> 00:11:36,900
I need an idea! I need an idea!
341
00:11:36,902 --> 00:11:39,002
I need an idea!
342
00:11:39,004 --> 00:11:40,370
? I got the power! ?
343
00:11:40,372 --> 00:11:41,671
Here's the plan.
344
00:11:41,673 --> 00:11:42,839
When I give the DJ the signal,
345
00:11:42,841 --> 00:11:43,873
he'll play a slow song.
346
00:11:43,875 --> 00:11:44,874
Ask Nori to dance.
347
00:11:44,876 --> 00:11:46,276
She'll say yes.
348
00:11:46,278 --> 00:11:47,544
Then, out on that dance floor,
349
00:11:47,546 --> 00:11:49,379
with the whole school watching,
350
00:11:49,381 --> 00:11:51,014
it's legend time.
351
00:11:51,016 --> 00:11:53,049
I have issues with
every part of that plan.
352
00:11:53,051 --> 00:11:54,417
I hear you.
353
00:11:54,419 --> 00:11:55,452
I'm ignoring what you're saying,
354
00:11:55,454 --> 00:11:56,719
but I hear you.
355
00:11:56,721 --> 00:11:58,388
? I got the power! ?
356
00:11:58,390 --> 00:12:00,423
Ladies, how are you this fine evening?
357
00:12:00,425 --> 00:12:02,492
Hey, Justin. Hey, Alex.
358
00:12:02,494 --> 00:12:03,893
I like your shirt.
359
00:12:03,895 --> 00:12:06,229
I picked it out for him.
360
00:12:06,231 --> 00:12:08,131
So, Nori, are you having a good...
361
00:12:08,133 --> 00:12:09,466
[sneezes loudly]
362
00:12:09,468 --> 00:12:11,334
[record needle scratches]
363
00:12:11,336 --> 00:12:12,669
[slow music plays over stereo]
364
00:12:12,671 --> 00:12:15,004
Excuse us for one second.
365
00:12:15,006 --> 00:12:16,539
Was... was that the signal?
366
00:12:16,541 --> 00:12:17,674
Yes and no.
367
00:12:17,676 --> 00:12:18,942
The signal is a sneeze,
368
00:12:18,944 --> 00:12:20,877
but that was an actual sneeze.
369
00:12:20,879 --> 00:12:22,445
So, man, I don't think I
can ask her to slow-dance.
370
00:12:22,447 --> 00:12:25,715
I mean, I've barely even talked to her.
371
00:12:25,717 --> 00:12:27,016
? Look into my eyes ?
372
00:12:27,018 --> 00:12:29,285
Want to dance?
373
00:12:29,287 --> 00:12:31,254
? ?
374
00:12:32,057 --> 00:12:33,756
Hey, Father, how you doin'?
375
00:12:33,758 --> 00:12:36,926
Let's see, it's been, like...
well, forever...
376
00:12:36,928 --> 00:12:40,497
since my last confession
because I'm not Catholic.
377
00:12:40,499 --> 00:12:43,132
Anyway, is there some kind
of prayer that I can say
378
00:12:43,134 --> 00:12:44,968
that'll get Jesus to
give me an awesome idea
379
00:12:44,970 --> 00:12:47,904
that I can turn around and
sell for a ton of money?
380
00:12:47,906 --> 00:12:49,506
Yeah. Seems about right.
381
00:12:49,508 --> 00:12:52,575
Meditation didn't work.
Religion didn't work.
382
00:12:52,577 --> 00:12:54,978
So that leaves one final option.
383
00:12:54,980 --> 00:12:56,379
Medicinal baked goods.
384
00:12:56,381 --> 00:12:58,114
- Now we're talking.
- All right.
385
00:12:58,116 --> 00:13:02,585
Good ideas... start flowing.
386
00:13:02,587 --> 00:13:06,022
[both laughing]
387
00:13:06,024 --> 00:13:09,759
[both snoring]
388
00:13:09,761 --> 00:13:11,528
? Look into your heart ?
389
00:13:11,530 --> 00:13:14,430
I'm so sorry, was that...
was that your toe again?
390
00:13:14,432 --> 00:13:16,099
Maybe you should let me lead.
391
00:13:16,101 --> 00:13:18,902
Wait, I was supposed to be leading?
392
00:13:18,904 --> 00:13:21,804
? Nothin' there to hide ?
393
00:13:21,806 --> 00:13:23,473
Better, right?
394
00:13:23,475 --> 00:13:25,241
Way better.
395
00:13:25,243 --> 00:13:27,210
? ?
396
00:13:27,212 --> 00:13:28,912
[making kissing sounds]
397
00:13:28,914 --> 00:13:30,380
[whispering] Shut up.
398
00:13:32,183 --> 00:13:33,616
Excuse me, Nori, just need to borrow
399
00:13:33,618 --> 00:13:35,051
my little bro for a sec.
400
00:13:35,053 --> 00:13:36,386
Come on. Everyone's watching.
401
00:13:36,388 --> 00:13:37,554
It's now or never.
402
00:13:37,556 --> 00:13:39,055
Here, eat this mint.
403
00:13:39,057 --> 00:13:40,924
Legends have fresh breath.
404
00:13:42,928 --> 00:13:44,260
Look, I don't know if you've heard,
405
00:13:44,262 --> 00:13:45,929
but there's a rumor going around
406
00:13:45,931 --> 00:13:47,463
that I date high school boys.
407
00:13:47,465 --> 00:13:48,998
[voice breaking] What?
Never. I've never...
408
00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,700
It's not true.
409
00:13:50,702 --> 00:13:52,402
Just because I don't date
anyone at our school,
410
00:13:52,404 --> 00:13:54,904
people make up mean stories about me.
411
00:13:54,906 --> 00:13:58,141
Well, why don't you date
anyone at our school?
412
00:13:58,143 --> 00:14:00,443
Because... until now,
413
00:14:00,445 --> 00:14:03,379
there hasn't been anyone that I liked.
414
00:14:03,381 --> 00:14:04,914
Till now?
415
00:14:04,916 --> 00:14:07,850
? There's no love ?
416
00:14:07,852 --> 00:14:11,421
? Like your love ?
417
00:14:11,423 --> 00:14:13,856
? And no other ?
418
00:14:13,858 --> 00:14:14,824
[gulps down mint]
419
00:14:14,826 --> 00:14:16,292
He's choking.
420
00:14:16,294 --> 00:14:17,894
You're telling me.
421
00:14:17,896 --> 00:14:20,330
No, he's literally choking.
422
00:14:20,332 --> 00:14:21,831
[gulping and gagging]
423
00:14:21,833 --> 00:14:23,633
Little bro!
424
00:14:23,635 --> 00:14:26,269
? ?
425
00:14:26,271 --> 00:14:27,804
[Alex and Justin grunting]
426
00:14:27,806 --> 00:14:28,938
Ugh!
427
00:14:28,940 --> 00:14:34,243
? All the way, yeah ?
428
00:14:34,245 --> 00:14:37,447
? You know it's true ?
429
00:14:37,449 --> 00:14:39,882
[crowd gasps]
430
00:14:39,884 --> 00:14:41,784
No!
431
00:14:45,534 --> 00:14:46,756
I'm so sorry, Nori.
432
00:14:47,148 --> 00:14:48,858
Just leave her alone, Chokey.
433
00:14:49,811 --> 00:14:51,427
Ch... Chokey?
434
00:14:51,429 --> 00:14:52,528
Uh-oh.
435
00:14:52,530 --> 00:14:54,430
- Chokey.
- All: Chokey.
436
00:14:54,432 --> 00:14:57,967
[chanting] Chokey! Chokey! Chokey!
437
00:14:57,969 --> 00:15:00,003
No, I... I don't want to be Chokey.
438
00:15:00,005 --> 00:15:02,271
Sorry, little bro. The mob has spoken.
439
00:15:02,273 --> 00:15:03,673
And once they land on a nickname,
440
00:15:03,675 --> 00:15:05,341
there's no turning back.
441
00:15:05,343 --> 00:15:06,843
What's up, One-Nut?
442
00:15:06,845 --> 00:15:08,378
All: Chokey! Chokey!
443
00:15:08,380 --> 00:15:09,679
? ?
444
00:15:13,777 --> 00:15:15,343
I'll have a cheeseburger, dry bun,
445
00:15:15,345 --> 00:15:16,778
and all the fries you
can fit on the plate.
446
00:15:16,780 --> 00:15:18,413
Oh, he just had a heart attack,
447
00:15:18,415 --> 00:15:20,537
so he'll have a salad instead of fries.
448
00:15:20,572 --> 00:15:21,416
Thanks.
449
00:15:21,418 --> 00:15:23,188
Hey, why don't you fly
to Sacramento with me?
450
00:15:23,223 --> 00:15:24,285
You could stay at Uncle Justin's.
451
00:15:24,371 --> 00:15:26,450
That's Governor Uncle Justin.
452
00:15:26,452 --> 00:15:28,218
Oh, yeah. How weird is that?
453
00:15:28,220 --> 00:15:29,720
Pretty damn weird.
454
00:15:30,789 --> 00:15:32,289
So, you're gonna be okay?
455
00:15:32,291 --> 00:15:34,158
When have I ever not been?
456
00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:35,459
Well, there was that time
you were super depressed
457
00:15:35,461 --> 00:15:36,760
and lived in a garage.
458
00:15:36,762 --> 00:15:38,395
Okay, it was a two-car garage,
459
00:15:38,397 --> 00:15:39,897
and you thought it was cool.
460
00:15:39,899 --> 00:15:41,199
I was eight, and I was humoring you.
461
00:15:41,267 --> 00:15:43,634
Abby, I may be entering
life's fourth quarter...
462
00:15:43,636 --> 00:15:44,968
Oh, seriously,
did you come out of the womb
463
00:15:44,970 --> 00:15:46,837
speaking in basketball metaphors?
464
00:15:46,839 --> 00:15:48,605
No.
465
00:15:48,607 --> 00:15:51,742
Something I picked up as a kid.
466
00:15:51,744 --> 00:15:53,243
Hey.
467
00:15:53,245 --> 00:15:55,045
I want to show you something.
468
00:15:55,047 --> 00:15:56,613
I really just want to go to bed.
469
00:15:56,615 --> 00:15:58,382
Oh, come on. It'll only take a minute.
470
00:15:58,384 --> 00:16:00,317
[sighs] Fine.
471
00:16:00,319 --> 00:16:02,085
I know how much you like Michael Jordan.
472
00:16:02,087 --> 00:16:04,254
I don't just like him. I love him.
473
00:16:04,256 --> 00:16:08,559
Well, here he is, missing
about a bazillion shots in a row.
474
00:16:08,561 --> 00:16:10,227
I get it, okay? This is Laker country.
475
00:16:10,229 --> 00:16:11,862
Sorry, but I'm not in the mood to talk
476
00:16:11,864 --> 00:16:13,463
about how overrated Michael
Jordan is right now.
477
00:16:13,465 --> 00:16:16,567
Overrated?
478
00:16:16,569 --> 00:16:20,070
Last season,
he scored 33.6 points per game
479
00:16:20,072 --> 00:16:22,639
and shot 52% from the field.
480
00:16:22,641 --> 00:16:24,069
Then why are you showing me this?
481
00:16:24,176 --> 00:16:27,811
'Cause that also means he
missed 48% of his shots.
482
00:16:27,813 --> 00:16:29,012
That's almost half.
483
00:16:29,014 --> 00:16:30,681
In a single season,
484
00:16:30,683 --> 00:16:33,917
the greatest basketball
player on the planet
485
00:16:33,919 --> 00:16:37,454
missed 1,036 shots.
486
00:16:40,092 --> 00:16:42,459
We all miss shots, Alex.
487
00:16:43,896 --> 00:16:46,396
And great ones keep shooting.
488
00:16:48,667 --> 00:16:50,734
So Justin told you about the dance, huh?
489
00:16:51,348 --> 00:16:52,936
Yep.
490
00:16:57,977 --> 00:17:01,111
[doorbell rings]
491
00:17:02,615 --> 00:17:04,581
? ?
492
00:17:04,583 --> 00:17:06,550
I need your help.
493
00:17:06,552 --> 00:17:08,552
? ?
494
00:17:08,554 --> 00:17:10,854
Oh, my God,
that's the worst thing I've ever tasted.
495
00:17:10,856 --> 00:17:12,489
Yep, your mom made it.
496
00:17:12,491 --> 00:17:16,593
Pretty sure she substituted
salt for sugar again.
497
00:17:16,595 --> 00:17:18,829
I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.
498
00:17:18,831 --> 00:17:21,231
You look like you're
having a nervous breakdown.
499
00:17:21,233 --> 00:17:23,066
All my life,
I've been able to look into the future
500
00:17:23,068 --> 00:17:25,736
and figure out what people need.
501
00:17:25,738 --> 00:17:28,939
Now it's like that well's dried up.
502
00:17:28,941 --> 00:17:31,275
Well, if the strategy isn't working,
503
00:17:31,277 --> 00:17:34,044
sometimes it helps to
do the exact opposite.
504
00:17:34,046 --> 00:17:35,545
The opposite of looking into the future
505
00:17:35,547 --> 00:17:37,247
is looking into the past.
506
00:17:37,249 --> 00:17:40,117
Not exactly a great
strategy for an inventor.
507
00:17:40,119 --> 00:17:42,119
Oh, God, please take this away from me.
508
00:17:42,121 --> 00:17:43,132
Oh, Alex.
509
00:17:43,155 --> 00:17:46,426
You just need to get back in touch
with that kid I met 25 years ago.
510
00:17:46,458 --> 00:17:48,091
That kid was gonna change the world.
511
00:17:48,093 --> 00:17:51,028
That kid does not exist anymore.
512
00:17:51,030 --> 00:17:53,530
That kid was killed by adulthood.
513
00:17:55,834 --> 00:17:57,768
Ah, shoot. Could you get that?
514
00:17:57,770 --> 00:18:00,337
Bending isn't so easy for me these days.
515
00:18:00,339 --> 00:18:02,706
No problem.
516
00:18:02,708 --> 00:18:07,411
? ?
517
00:18:07,413 --> 00:18:10,314
You dropped that fork on purpose.
518
00:18:10,316 --> 00:18:11,815
Yep.
519
00:18:12,559 --> 00:18:13,917
So it isn't the world-changing idea
520
00:18:13,919 --> 00:18:15,686
that I was searching for.
521
00:18:15,687 --> 00:18:18,704
_
522
00:18:19,325 --> 00:18:21,558
But it did give me what I needed.
523
00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:23,360
A new beginning.
524
00:18:23,362 --> 00:18:26,229
There was no new
beginning for me and Nori.
525
00:18:26,231 --> 00:18:28,198
But you know how I said
that our lives are defined
526
00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:30,767
by how we choose to deal with bad stuff?
527
00:18:30,769 --> 00:18:32,369
Well, the way I dealt with Nori
528
00:18:32,371 --> 00:18:35,605
after the mint disaster was simple.
529
00:18:35,607 --> 00:18:38,875
Totally avoided her.
530
00:18:38,877 --> 00:18:41,178
But here's the thing
about new beginnings.
531
00:18:41,180 --> 00:18:43,246
They don't always start on page one.
532
00:18:43,248 --> 00:18:45,015
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
533
00:18:45,017 --> 00:18:48,452
But you know what?
You can keep the mint.
534
00:18:48,454 --> 00:18:49,953
Believe it or not,
one of those things cost me
535
00:18:49,955 --> 00:18:52,522
the love of my life 50 years ago.
536
00:18:52,524 --> 00:18:54,257
Alex?
537
00:18:54,259 --> 00:18:56,426
Eleanor.
538
00:18:57,663 --> 00:19:00,564
[The La's "There She Goes"]
539
00:19:00,566 --> 00:19:01,698
? ?
540
00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:03,033
Nori.
541
00:19:03,035 --> 00:19:05,135
Turns out Nori owns the place.
542
00:19:05,137 --> 00:19:06,870
She bought the diner
a couple of years ago
543
00:19:06,872 --> 00:19:08,672
after her husband died.
544
00:19:08,674 --> 00:19:12,542
Pretty crazy that this place
has not changed in 50 years.
545
00:19:12,544 --> 00:19:14,077
That's what I love about it.
546
00:19:14,079 --> 00:19:16,079
It's like a time machine.
547
00:19:16,081 --> 00:19:19,516
Which is one of the things
I haven't managed to invent.
548
00:19:19,518 --> 00:19:21,551
That, and the non-choking mint.
549
00:19:21,553 --> 00:19:22,986
Too soon.
550
00:19:22,988 --> 00:19:24,755
[laughs]
551
00:19:26,125 --> 00:19:28,091
Well, I'm gonna let you get back to it.
552
00:19:28,093 --> 00:19:29,826
And I've gotta get home
because I've gotta figure out
553
00:19:29,828 --> 00:19:32,396
what I'm gonna do with
the rest of my life.
554
00:19:32,398 --> 00:19:36,266
Gosh, it was... it was really
great seeing you again, Alex.
555
00:19:36,268 --> 00:19:37,834
Ah... mm.
556
00:19:37,836 --> 00:19:39,536
[giggles]
557
00:19:50,883 --> 00:19:53,984
[The Flaming Lips' "Do You Realize?"]
558
00:19:53,986 --> 00:19:58,989
? ?
559
00:19:58,991 --> 00:20:01,224
Keep shooting.
560
00:20:01,226 --> 00:20:08,532
? ?
561
00:20:11,136 --> 00:20:15,672
? Do you realize ?
562
00:20:15,674 --> 00:20:18,542
? ?
563
00:20:18,544 --> 00:20:21,845
? That you have ?
564
00:20:21,847 --> 00:20:28,018
? The most beautiful face? ?
565
00:20:28,020 --> 00:20:29,152
? Do you realize ?
566
00:20:29,154 --> 00:20:31,254
Keep shooting.
567
00:20:31,256 --> 00:20:34,024
That's exactly what I intend on doing.
568
00:20:34,026 --> 00:20:35,759
But no player,
569
00:20:35,761 --> 00:20:37,427
not even the great Michael Jordan,
570
00:20:37,429 --> 00:20:38,462
can win on his own.
571
00:20:38,464 --> 00:20:40,096
[soft knocking]
572
00:20:40,098 --> 00:20:41,865
In order to succeed...
573
00:20:41,867 --> 00:20:44,468
? Do you realize ?
574
00:20:44,501 --> 00:20:46,570
...you need great teammates.
575
00:20:46,572 --> 00:20:48,138
Hey, Dad.
576
00:20:48,140 --> 00:20:49,840
[giggling]
577
00:20:49,842 --> 00:20:51,708
Hi!
578
00:20:51,710 --> 00:20:53,977
Welcome!
579
00:20:53,979 --> 00:20:55,145
You like the new house?
580
00:20:56,752 --> 00:20:58,777
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
581
00:20:58,827 --> 00:21:03,377
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