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1
00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:13,555
Well, I'm moving
to Colorado
2
00:00:13,596 --> 00:00:15,181
to start
my new life with Holly.
3
00:00:15,223 --> 00:00:18,309
Just up here
getting used to the altitude.
4
00:00:18,351 --> 00:00:19,436
- Michael?
- Yes?
5
00:00:19,477 --> 00:00:20,687
I've got a treat for you.
6
00:00:20,729 --> 00:00:21,855
Oh!
7
00:00:21,896 --> 00:00:23,189
Thank you.
Like a butler.
8
00:00:23,231 --> 00:00:25,442
Colorado specialty--
Rocky Mountain oysters.
9
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:29,946
Wow, those do not
taste like oysters.
10
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:31,489
That's because
they're not oysters.
11
00:00:31,531 --> 00:00:32,907
They're bull testicles!
12
00:00:32,949 --> 00:00:34,701
I cut them off
fresh this morning!
13
00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:36,161
Ha!
14
00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:38,246
Sick freak.
What is wrong with you?
15
00:00:38,288 --> 00:00:40,248
What is wrong with you.
I'm the sick freak?
16
00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:42,667
After what you did,
you expect to be buttled?
17
00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,169
After you didn't
recommend me?
18
00:00:44,210 --> 00:00:46,421
Dwight, I don't own
Dunder Mifflin, okay?
19
00:00:46,463 --> 00:00:48,006
[scoffs]
20
00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:50,133
The job
was not mine to give.
21
00:00:54,846 --> 00:00:56,348
[sighs]
22
00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:58,600
Look, I need your advice
on something.
23
00:00:58,641 --> 00:01:02,854
I am told that there are bears
in the Rockies.
24
00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:03,938
Where did you hear that?
25
00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:06,608
Obvious XM radio?
26
00:01:06,649 --> 00:01:07,859
Well,
I was just thinking
27
00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:11,905
that maybe I should keep
a salami in my pocket...
28
00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:13,031
Great idea.
29
00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,366
In order
to feed the bears.
30
00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:16,701
Especially if you think
that life would be better
31
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,370
without legs!
32
00:01:18,411 --> 00:01:20,038
How do you mean?
33
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,540
Black bears can smell a salami
at five miles, Michael.
34
00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:23,750
What are you thinking?
35
00:01:23,792 --> 00:01:25,543
And they run
faster than a horse.
36
00:01:25,585 --> 00:01:27,504
So if you were thinking about
outrunning them on a horse,
37
00:01:27,545 --> 00:01:28,588
I would try a cheetah.
38
00:01:28,630 --> 00:01:30,924
You in tight pants, Michael,
39
00:01:30,965 --> 00:01:33,259
are a salami
to a black bear.
40
00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:35,220
- Do you understand?
- Mm-hmm.
41
00:01:35,261 --> 00:01:38,348
You're like
a giant walking salami.
42
00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:40,016
Okay, so no salami
in the pants.
43
00:01:40,058 --> 00:01:41,226
How about a pepperoni?
44
00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,436
Any kind of meat
you can possibly name.
45
00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:44,562
Okay.
46
00:01:44,604 --> 00:01:47,565
{\an8}[cheerful music]
47
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:54,322
{\an8}♪ ♪
48
00:02:18,471 --> 00:02:19,723
[deep breath]
49
00:02:19,764 --> 00:02:21,808
You're not gonna
take all your toys, are you?
50
00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:23,393
{\an8}Hmm?
51
00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:24,519
{\an8}I mean, you don't--
52
00:02:24,561 --> 00:02:25,979
{\an8}you don't have
a job lined up, so...
53
00:02:26,021 --> 00:02:28,481
{\an8}it's not like you have
a desk to put 'em on.
54
00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:29,441
{\an8}Well, I have interviews.
55
00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:30,900
{\an8}That's nice.
56
00:02:30,942 --> 00:02:32,861
{\an8}What about that truck?
57
00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:35,280
{\an8}Can I have
this little truck?
58
00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:36,489
{\an8}Was thinking
thinking I might
59
00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:38,450
{\an8}glue a stapler on top
60
00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:42,370
{\an8}or put a hole here
and stick pens in it.
61
00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:43,496
{\an8}You okay?
62
00:02:43,538 --> 00:02:44,622
{\an8}Yes.
63
00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:46,374
{\an8}Yes, you know what,
64
00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:49,127
{\an8}take my favorite truck, sure.
65
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,879
{\an8}You know what, uh...
66
00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:53,006
{\an8}it's your
last couple of days.
67
00:02:53,048 --> 00:02:54,632
{\an8}I'm gonna
get out of your hair.
68
00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:55,967
{\an8}Oh, you don't--
69
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,969
{\an8}I will be
in the break room.
70
00:02:58,011 --> 00:02:59,346
{\an8}Okay, that sounds good.
71
00:02:59,387 --> 00:03:00,597
{\an8}Thank you.
72
00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:05,185
{\an8}[whispers]
Dead man walking.
73
00:03:05,226 --> 00:03:06,269
{\an8}Sad?
74
00:03:06,311 --> 00:03:07,687
{\an8}Boo hoo hoo!
75
00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:08,980
{\an8}[laughs] No.
76
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,815
{\an8}No, no.
I don't leave till tomorrow,
77
00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:13,902
{\an8}so tomorrow
I will be a wreck.
78
00:03:21,409 --> 00:03:23,036
{\an8}- Stay away from Erin.
- Hey.
79
00:03:23,078 --> 00:03:24,329
{\an8}I'm your boss.
80
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:26,289
{\an8}Why don't you, uh,
stay away from me?
81
00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:28,166
{\an8}No, I'm gonna stand
where I want, okay?
82
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:29,793
{\an8}You don't want to get
on my bad side.
83
00:03:29,834 --> 00:03:31,211
{\an8}I've seen
some horrible things.
84
00:03:31,252 --> 00:03:33,254
{\an8}I own over 200 horror movies.
85
00:03:33,296 --> 00:03:35,131
{\an8}Okay, that's so weird!
Just go away!
86
00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:37,842
{\an8}No, you go away.
87
00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:39,511
{\an8}[toilet flushes]
88
00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:46,309
{\an8}Hi, Jim.
89
00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,021
{\an8}You guys
are filming people
90
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:52,524
{\an8}when they go
to the bathroom now?
91
00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:53,900
{\an8}How about cupcakes?
92
00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:55,402
{\an8}Please.
93
00:03:55,443 --> 00:03:57,112
{\an8}- What's wrong with cupcakes?
- Everything.
94
00:03:57,153 --> 00:03:58,655
{\an8}There they are.
95
00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:01,157
{\an8}The party planning committee
together again.
96
00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:03,034
{\an8}Well, we all wanted to plan
your good-bye party.
97
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:05,036
{\an8}We thought this
would be easier.
98
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:06,538
{\an8}We thought.
99
00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:07,831
{\an8}It's an experiment.
100
00:04:07,872 --> 00:04:10,125
{\an8}The three of us have all been
chairmen before.
101
00:04:10,166 --> 00:04:11,835
{\an8}So this is the dream team.
102
00:04:11,876 --> 00:04:13,461
{\an8}Hey!
103
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:15,213
{\an8}What are you saying?
104
00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:17,966
{\an8}The dream team
and Meredith.
105
00:04:18,008 --> 00:04:19,467
{\an8}We decided
on the ice cream.
106
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,344
{\an8}Mint chocolate chip--
your favorite.
107
00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:22,262
Mmm!
108
00:04:22,303 --> 00:04:23,513
Yeah, that was
a surprise.
109
00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:24,723
You know what?
110
00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:26,057
I'm thinking maybe
we should get ice cream
111
00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,517
that everybody will like.
112
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:28,518
How about vanilla?
113
00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,311
Let's get vanilla.
114
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:31,646
Okay.
115
00:04:31,688 --> 00:04:34,441
Tomorrow, I want everybody
to have a good time.
116
00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:35,734
No drama.
117
00:04:35,775 --> 00:04:37,736
And as for today,
118
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:38,945
just a typical day.
119
00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:40,572
All right?
120
00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:42,365
Should we get toppings?
121
00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:45,118
- What do you like, Pam?
- What?
122
00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:47,537
What kind of topping
would you like?
123
00:04:47,579 --> 00:04:49,039
Hot fudge?
124
00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:50,582
Sounds good.
125
00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:52,125
Fudge it up.
126
00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:59,382
I bought this for myself.
127
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,928
And yesterday,
128
00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,472
they gave me this.
129
00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:17,192
I still need something
to drink out of, though.
130
00:05:29,412 --> 00:05:30,830
Attention, everyone.
131
00:05:30,872 --> 00:05:32,665
Before I leave tomorrow,
I would like to reveal a secret
132
00:05:32,707 --> 00:05:35,502
that I have kept
for over 20 years.
133
00:05:35,543 --> 00:05:38,254
Secret about Phyllis.
134
00:05:38,296 --> 00:05:39,589
Please, Michael.
135
00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:42,342
When Phyllis was
in high school,
136
00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:46,179
she was so cute.
137
00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:49,099
And she still is.
138
00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:52,227
I thought he knew
about the baby I gave away.
139
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,824
Do you hate
that I am proud and brown
140
00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:08,702
and standing here, alive,
141
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:11,162
with baby oil
on my Nubian thighs?
142
00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:12,747
I will survive.
143
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:15,083
I will survive.
144
00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:17,168
Big mama Angelou.
145
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:19,379
[groans]
146
00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:20,964
Doing the crossword.
147
00:06:21,006 --> 00:06:25,301
Let us do one last crossword
together, as brothers.
148
00:06:25,343 --> 00:06:26,845
- No.
- Shall we? Yes, let's.
149
00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,430
Nope. No.
150
00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:36,980
It's called hentai,
and it's art.
151
00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:38,690
- Look, Michael.
- Hmm!
152
00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:40,108
It's a going-away present
153
00:06:40,150 --> 00:06:41,609
so your hands
won't get cold.
154
00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:42,569
Ah.
155
00:06:42,610 --> 00:06:43,987
It's almost done,
156
00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:45,864
but you can't get them wet,
157
00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:47,699
and they can't be
dry-cleaned either.
158
00:06:47,741 --> 00:06:50,452
You have to hand wash
without water,
159
00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:51,619
wring dry gently,
160
00:06:51,661 --> 00:06:53,872
and use a hair dryer
on cool.
161
00:06:56,041 --> 00:06:57,584
Sounds great.
162
00:06:57,625 --> 00:06:59,961
I just think it's great.
163
00:07:00,003 --> 00:07:02,589
Oh, I have gifts as well.
164
00:07:02,630 --> 00:07:06,551
And I will start by giving
the first gift to Phyllis.
165
00:07:06,593 --> 00:07:09,888
Phyllis, you are
shy and sweet,
166
00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:12,766
and you don't often
speak your mind,
167
00:07:12,807 --> 00:07:15,268
but you should,
because you have great ideas.
168
00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:17,145
So, Phyllis,
I am giving you this
169
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:18,813
so you can always remember
to speak your mind.
170
00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:21,107
[laughs]
Gee, thanks, Michael.
171
00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:22,525
- You're welcome.
- It's cute.
172
00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:26,488
Stanley, you love your
"so-du-ku" and your puzzles.
173
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,740
I bestow upon you...
174
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,575
my felt.
175
00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:32,577
May you never lose
176
00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:34,913
the fun-loving quality
in life.
177
00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:37,457
Where's the rest of it?
178
00:07:37,499 --> 00:07:38,833
It's got no balls.
179
00:07:38,875 --> 00:07:40,251
Well, okay.
180
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:42,128
And Andy.
181
00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:46,341
Andy, who needs confidence
that he is a great salesman,
182
00:07:46,383 --> 00:07:47,967
I give you
183
00:07:48,009 --> 00:07:50,637
my clients.
184
00:07:50,679 --> 00:07:52,514
Our ten
most important accounts.
185
00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:54,641
Wow.
186
00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,101
- Excuse me, what?
- Yeah, wow.
187
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:58,436
You know I'm
the worst salesman here, right?
188
00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:01,064
But you're the best salesman
on the inside.
189
00:08:01,106 --> 00:08:02,232
What does that even mean?
190
00:08:02,273 --> 00:08:04,275
You sold us all on Andy--
191
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,653
a product
that nobody wanted.
192
00:08:06,695 --> 00:08:09,322
Thanks again
for the pool table, Michael.
193
00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:10,782
I'm gonna lose 'em.
194
00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:11,741
You're not going
to lose them.
195
00:08:11,783 --> 00:08:13,076
I promise you
that I will.
196
00:08:13,118 --> 00:08:14,327
Just do your best.
197
00:08:14,369 --> 00:08:15,870
I have faith in you.
198
00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:21,042
Gimme those clients.
199
00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:22,168
No.
200
00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:25,171
Do you believe that?
201
00:08:25,213 --> 00:08:27,340
I've given up expecting
Michael to do the right thing
202
00:08:27,382 --> 00:08:28,550
or the decent thing
203
00:08:28,591 --> 00:08:30,510
or even
the comprehensible thing.
204
00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:32,554
I used to be obese.
205
00:08:32,595 --> 00:08:34,180
Once you've
conquered obesity,
206
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:35,932
everything else is easy.
207
00:08:35,974 --> 00:08:39,811
Life literally
moves in slow motion.
208
00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:41,855
I'm not saying
I'm Superman,
209
00:08:41,896 --> 00:08:44,441
but let me just
put it this way,
210
00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:46,568
if I were shot in the head,
211
00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:48,695
I'm pretty sure
everything would be fine.
212
00:08:48,737 --> 00:08:50,488
I almost welcome it.
213
00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:53,450
Hey, hey!
214
00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:55,368
How's the number-crunching
going?
215
00:08:55,410 --> 00:08:56,703
[in monotone]
Num-num-num-num-num-num.
216
00:08:56,745 --> 00:08:58,663
I'm stuck in a cage.
217
00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:00,165
I'd rather be skiing.
218
00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:01,499
[speaking normally]
Actually, I am going to be
219
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:02,709
skiing a week from now.
220
00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:05,128
Michael, I'm really
gonna miss you.
221
00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:07,130
You are so damn funny.
222
00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:08,965
I know, I know.
223
00:09:09,007 --> 00:09:12,177
And Kevin, I have
something for you.
224
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:13,428
Oh!
225
00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:17,557
- Oh.
- Oh.
226
00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:19,184
You know who that is?
227
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:21,936
Oh.
228
00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:27,692
Don't be a caricature, Kevin.
229
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:30,487
Never be a caricature.
230
00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,655
How did that feel
when I tore that up?
231
00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:34,074
- Better?
- Good.
232
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:35,533
Stand up.
233
00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:41,831
You will be thin.
234
00:09:41,873 --> 00:09:45,960
You won't drool over pizza
like an animal anymore.
235
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:48,254
But, I--
236
00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:51,216
You will find love.
237
00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:53,968
Michael, I'm pretty much okay
with who I am now.
238
00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:55,470
Don't be.
239
00:09:55,512 --> 00:09:57,472
You should never settle
for who you are.
240
00:09:58,473 --> 00:09:59,766
Come here.
241
00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:01,142
Meredith, come here.
242
00:10:03,311 --> 00:10:04,521
Hold hands.
243
00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:07,440
- [groans] Michael.
- Just do it.
244
00:10:07,482 --> 00:10:09,150
Look into each other's eyes.
245
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:12,904
Think about it.
246
00:10:27,502 --> 00:10:30,422
Oscar, Oscar, Oscar.
247
00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:32,257
Oscar,
248
00:10:32,298 --> 00:10:33,758
you are a--
249
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,385
Michael, I just lost
Porter Hardware!
250
00:10:35,427 --> 00:10:36,845
I just--I lost 'em.
251
00:10:36,886 --> 00:10:38,430
Okay, you know what?
252
00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:41,349
Just do your best, buddy.
253
00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:42,809
[groans]
Okay.
254
00:10:42,851 --> 00:10:45,562
Oscar, you are very smart,
255
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:49,649
and you have
a gigantic education,
256
00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:52,318
and I think of you
as my scarecrow,
257
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:54,320
because you gave me
a brain.
258
00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:57,198
So that's
why I made you this.
259
00:11:00,702 --> 00:11:03,163
Thank you, Michael.
260
00:11:03,204 --> 00:11:04,247
It's beautiful.
261
00:11:05,373 --> 00:11:07,459
[laughing]
262
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,877
It looks like...
263
00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:13,423
It looks like it was made
by a two-year-old monkey
264
00:11:13,465 --> 00:11:15,717
on a farm.
265
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,803
And he just...
266
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:22,932
he just accepted it,
that I...
267
00:11:22,974 --> 00:11:26,478
that I put all this work
into it.
268
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:28,396
Oh, man.
269
00:11:28,438 --> 00:11:32,317
He--he has the lowest opinion
of me of anybody.
270
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:33,526
Oh!
271
00:11:33,568 --> 00:11:35,236
Was it just me,
272
00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:37,739
or did you think we were gonna
have sex at some point?
273
00:11:37,781 --> 00:11:39,115
It was just you.
274
00:11:39,157 --> 00:11:40,450
How would you
have wanted to do it?
275
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:41,993
I--don't.
276
00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,703
Okay, you know what?
Inappropriate,
277
00:11:43,745 --> 00:11:45,205
because I am engaged happily,
278
00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:48,416
and you, you have landed
yourself a senator.
279
00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:49,584
State senator.
280
00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:51,211
Mm-hmm. Bravo.
281
00:11:51,252 --> 00:11:52,712
- Brava.
- Bra--?
282
00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:53,880
Do you want to see
some pictures?
283
00:11:53,922 --> 00:11:56,591
- I just got these.
- Sure.
284
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:58,551
Um, these are--
okay, um,
285
00:11:58,593 --> 00:12:00,804
- this is us at the theater.
- Ohh!
286
00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:02,889
And, uh, antiquing.
287
00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:04,599
Oh. [stilted laugh]
288
00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:06,226
Oh, rollerblading.
289
00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:07,477
Rollerblading.
290
00:12:07,519 --> 00:12:08,728
Who's that?
Who's that guy?
291
00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:10,230
Oh, that's Thomas,
Robert's aide.
292
00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:11,356
Hmm.
293
00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:13,692
I guess this could be
the one, huh?
294
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:16,653
Yeah. Yeah.
295
00:12:16,695 --> 00:12:18,947
Mr. Lawston--Lawson,
296
00:12:18,988 --> 00:12:22,617
what you need to know
is that you're my client,
297
00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:23,993
and since you're my client,
298
00:12:24,035 --> 00:12:25,870
I think about you
night and day.
299
00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:27,789
I think about you
in the shower.
300
00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:29,332
[stammers, laughs]
301
00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:30,750
That came out weird.
302
00:12:30,792 --> 00:12:31,918
It's not like I masturbate
303
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,753
at the thought of you
or something.
304
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:35,964
N-no, no, no, no, no.
305
00:12:36,006 --> 00:12:38,299
No, p-please, don't do anything
over the phone.
306
00:12:38,341 --> 00:12:39,968
Can I be honest with you?
I'm intimidated
307
00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:42,512
by your incredibly deep voice
right now,
308
00:12:42,554 --> 00:12:45,432
and I'd just love the chance
to come in in person
309
00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:50,270
and make a final plea, please?
310
00:12:50,311 --> 00:12:53,023
Yes, thank you! Bye.
311
00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:55,859
I'll give you a dollar
for the rest of your clients.
312
00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:57,110
Think about it.
313
00:12:59,362 --> 00:13:02,323
[whistling]
314
00:13:02,365 --> 00:13:06,327
[sizzling]
315
00:13:06,369 --> 00:13:08,496
- Hey.
- Hey.
316
00:13:08,538 --> 00:13:11,791
Um, I'm gonna be
dropping in
317
00:13:11,833 --> 00:13:13,168
on one of our biggest clients
this afternoon,
318
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:14,627
and I could use
some backup.
319
00:13:14,669 --> 00:13:16,671
Let's rip it up, homes.
320
00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,089
All right.
321
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:20,008
Boom.
322
00:13:24,554 --> 00:13:26,639
Walk away, bitch.
323
00:13:26,681 --> 00:13:28,266
- Oh, um, Michael.
- Hmm?
324
00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:30,560
Uh, where do you want
your last paycheck sent?
325
00:13:30,602 --> 00:13:32,729
Last paycheck?
326
00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:37,025
Do you have an address yet
in Colorado?
327
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:38,777
No.
328
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:42,322
What town do
Holly's parents live in?
329
00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:43,198
I'm not sure.
330
00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:47,535
Um, Mountain... ton,
I think.
331
00:13:47,577 --> 00:13:50,038
Sounds beautiful.
332
00:13:52,457 --> 00:13:53,667
You should do
more stuff like that.
333
00:13:53,708 --> 00:13:55,001
I'm going to.
334
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,836
Hey.
It's almost your last day.
335
00:13:56,878 --> 00:13:57,837
Come on. Sit with us.
336
00:13:57,879 --> 00:13:59,422
No, I'm almost done.
337
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:01,174
- You sure?
- Yeah.
338
00:14:02,884 --> 00:14:04,552
So I'm going to Carbondale
this afternoon
339
00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:05,845
to get a new bulk shredder.
340
00:14:05,887 --> 00:14:07,472
Finally.
341
00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:09,015
That old shredder sucked.
342
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:10,016
It's a good shredder.
343
00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:11,184
It just keeps breaking.
344
00:14:11,226 --> 00:14:13,103
Yeah, and it won't
shred magazines.
345
00:14:13,144 --> 00:14:15,105
It's not supposed
to shred magazines, Kevin.
346
00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:17,273
I know.
347
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:19,025
Did you break
the shredder, Kevin?
348
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:20,652
No.
It's just
349
00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:22,696
that old shredder sucks.
350
00:14:22,737 --> 00:14:24,406
Just get one
that'll shred magazines.
351
00:14:24,447 --> 00:14:25,949
[cries softly]
352
00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:28,702
I don't think any of them
are supposed to shred magazines.
353
00:14:28,743 --> 00:14:30,578
Michael, you all right?
354
00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,330
[voice breaking]
Yeah.
355
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:36,292
Ah, these boots, man,
they're really...
356
00:14:36,334 --> 00:14:38,253
hurting my feet.
357
00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:41,006
Ugh. Ah.
358
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:43,883
I think I'm gonna try to find
my old shoes.
359
00:14:48,013 --> 00:14:49,848
You really think
it's about his boots?
360
00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:52,142
No.
361
00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:06,948
Do you ever regret leaving?
362
00:15:06,990 --> 00:15:09,492
I'd say about 90%
of every day. [chuckles]
363
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:11,494
- Hmm.
- But look, Michael,
364
00:15:11,536 --> 00:15:13,705
everybody is getting downsized
these days.
365
00:15:13,747 --> 00:15:15,707
- Oh, no, no, no, no.
- There is no shame in...
366
00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:17,042
This was my decision.
367
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:18,710
I'm going to Colorado
to be with Holly.
368
00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:20,587
Sure, yeah, and I left
369
00:15:20,628 --> 00:15:24,049
to "spend more time
with my kids."
370
00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:26,384
Oh, I never thought
I'd be that guy
371
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:28,219
that hangs around
the public library.
372
00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:30,180
No, really, David,
I didn't get fired.
373
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:32,891
Well...
374
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:35,185
well, then this is
a terrible decision.
375
00:15:35,226 --> 00:15:36,478
Michael, I mean,
if what you're telling me
376
00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:38,396
is actually
the accurate truth,
377
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:39,689
then don't do this.
378
00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:41,858
You are very, very lucky
to have a job.
379
00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:43,401
And Colorado?
380
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,403
Between you and me,
Colorado's one big REI store.
381
00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:46,905
Nobody reads books--
382
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:48,865
except if you count
that Joseph Campbell book
383
00:15:48,907 --> 00:15:50,200
they read over and over again.
384
00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:51,534
Everybody's a racist,
385
00:15:51,576 --> 00:15:53,036
women don't shave
their underarms.
386
00:15:53,078 --> 00:15:55,163
I mean, it-it--
[computer beeps]
387
00:15:58,416 --> 00:16:00,502
[crying] I can't--
388
00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:02,712
I can't do this.
389
00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:05,548
All the channels
are gonna be different there.
390
00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,550
I'm not gonna be able
to find my shows.
391
00:16:07,592 --> 00:16:11,680
I'm not going
to start improv at level one.
392
00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:14,849
I don't think my credits
are gonna transfer.
393
00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:16,726
Ohh! And you know what?
394
00:16:16,768 --> 00:16:21,106
I just figured out where I was
supposed to go to vote.
395
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:22,691
[sniffles]
396
00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:24,734
I gotta call her.
397
00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:28,947
And I'm going to tell her
that I cannot come.
398
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:32,283
[line ringing]
399
00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:34,035
Hello there.
400
00:16:34,077 --> 00:16:36,079
Hi.
401
00:16:36,121 --> 00:16:38,039
What is the name
of our town?
402
00:16:38,081 --> 00:16:39,541
Boulder.
403
00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:41,584
Is something wrong?
Are you okay?
404
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:44,587
No. No, I just needed
to hear your voice.
405
00:16:44,629 --> 00:16:46,256
[deep voice]
Oh, you mean this?
406
00:16:46,297 --> 00:16:48,925
[laughing]
407
00:16:48,967 --> 00:16:50,301
Yeah.
408
00:16:50,343 --> 00:16:52,804
[in falsetto]
Yes, my hero.
409
00:16:52,846 --> 00:16:54,931
[deep voice]
I'll pay the rent.
410
00:16:54,973 --> 00:16:57,767
[laughing]
411
00:16:57,809 --> 00:16:59,811
Okay,
my mom's looking at me
412
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:01,730
like she has
no sense of humor.
413
00:17:01,771 --> 00:17:02,939
It's a joke.
414
00:17:02,981 --> 00:17:05,191
[laughing]
415
00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:06,693
Oh, I miss you.
416
00:17:06,735 --> 00:17:07,944
Well, I'll see you tonight.
417
00:17:07,986 --> 00:17:10,196
I'll pick you up
outside baggage claim.
418
00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:12,282
Okay, I'll see you tonight.
419
00:17:12,323 --> 00:17:14,451
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
420
00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:21,750
Yeah, so I know
I told everybody
421
00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:23,710
that tomorrow
is my last day,
422
00:17:23,752 --> 00:17:27,714
but I'm--
I'm gonna be leaving tonight.
423
00:17:27,756 --> 00:17:29,674
I, uh, head
to the airport at 4:00.
424
00:17:34,012 --> 00:17:36,181
[sighs]
And, uh,
425
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:38,391
I have said good-bye
to half of them.
426
00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:47,067
Well, you know, Michael,
I have a brother in Boulder.
427
00:17:47,108 --> 00:17:48,818
Rory Flenderson.
428
00:17:48,860 --> 00:17:50,862
You should look him up.
429
00:17:58,453 --> 00:18:00,121
Okay.
430
00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:01,122
Okay?
431
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:06,461
Ahem, Kelly?
432
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:11,383
Kelly?
433
00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:12,884
Kelly?
434
00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:13,968
What?
435
00:18:14,010 --> 00:18:16,346
If I just went away
right now,
436
00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:19,057
would that be the best gift
that I could give you?
437
00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:21,643
Yes, please.
Please go away
438
00:18:21,685 --> 00:18:23,812
and stop using
that weird, slow voice.
439
00:18:29,150 --> 00:18:31,194
- [electrical buzzing]
- She was once my girl,
440
00:18:31,236 --> 00:18:33,530
and she is your girl now.
441
00:18:33,571 --> 00:18:35,031
Wow.
442
00:18:35,073 --> 00:18:36,324
Yeah.
443
00:18:36,366 --> 00:18:38,410
This is
totally unnecessary.
444
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:39,869
You're not prone
to seizures?
445
00:18:39,911 --> 00:18:41,663
No.
446
00:18:41,705 --> 00:18:43,498
It's really buzzing.
447
00:18:43,540 --> 00:18:45,834
I don't even
hear her anymore.
448
00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:47,043
Cool.
449
00:18:49,587 --> 00:18:51,297
Thanks, Michael.
450
00:18:51,339 --> 00:18:53,133
Don't thank me.
451
00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:54,592
Thank her.
452
00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:01,641
Truthfully...
453
00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:03,893
I just didn't want to pack it.
454
00:19:03,935 --> 00:19:07,480
So Michael said we can do
whatever we want cake-wise.
455
00:19:07,522 --> 00:19:08,815
What do we want?
456
00:19:08,857 --> 00:19:10,525
- Erotic.
- See?
457
00:19:10,567 --> 00:19:11,818
This is what happens.
458
00:19:11,860 --> 00:19:13,570
You can't let a street dog
into the house.
459
00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:15,113
Mmm, let's hear her out.
460
00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:16,197
I would, uh,
461
00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:17,699
like to hear
more about these cakes.
462
00:19:17,741 --> 00:19:19,367
I know these Ethiopians
that run a cake shop.
463
00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:20,618
Good God.
464
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:22,495
They make these cakes
that are wild.
465
00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:23,663
I mean...
466
00:19:23,705 --> 00:19:25,999
they show everything.
467
00:19:26,041 --> 00:19:27,667
I don't--I don't think
we want a--
468
00:19:27,709 --> 00:19:28,835
No, I know
what you're thinking,
469
00:19:28,877 --> 00:19:30,545
but it's not just Black.
They do it all.
470
00:19:30,587 --> 00:19:33,965
The best erotic bakers
are foreigners.
471
00:19:34,007 --> 00:19:36,885
In their country, they were
doctors or master artists,
472
00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:40,347
but over here, the only
opportunity they have
473
00:19:40,388 --> 00:19:43,433
is to be erotic bakers.
474
00:19:43,475 --> 00:19:45,018
Lucky us.
475
00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:46,936
And the women
on these cakes,
476
00:19:46,978 --> 00:19:48,688
they're not
just guys' fantasies.
477
00:19:48,730 --> 00:19:51,066
They have real, full women.
478
00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:52,400
It is refreshing.
479
00:19:52,442 --> 00:19:55,111
Okay, don't turn this
into some feminist issue.
480
00:19:55,153 --> 00:19:57,781
As a person who buys
a lot of erotic cakes,
481
00:19:57,822 --> 00:20:00,533
it just feels good
to be represented on one.
482
00:20:00,575 --> 00:20:02,410
You know what?
I think we should get
483
00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:04,454
some other input.
484
00:20:04,496 --> 00:20:05,914
I think we should
do cupcakes.
485
00:20:05,955 --> 00:20:07,540
I am one of the few people
who looks hot
486
00:20:07,582 --> 00:20:08,708
eating a cupcake.
487
00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:10,627
Yeah, cupcakes,
that's what I said.
488
00:20:10,669 --> 00:20:12,003
No.
I am not cleaning up
489
00:20:12,045 --> 00:20:14,089
a bunch of
uneaten cupcake bottoms.
490
00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:15,715
You know, we don't really care
about your opinion.
491
00:20:15,757 --> 00:20:17,384
You're just a tie-breaker.
492
00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:19,844
Um, Pam?
493
00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:21,304
Oh, hey, Michael.
494
00:20:21,346 --> 00:20:23,264
I'm just gonna go to Carbondale
to price some shredders.
495
00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:24,265
I'll see you later.
496
00:20:24,307 --> 00:20:26,101
Okay.
497
00:20:44,285 --> 00:20:45,495
Gabe!
498
00:20:45,537 --> 00:20:46,996
I need to talk to you.
499
00:20:47,038 --> 00:20:48,331
You can't be in here.
This is a ladies' bathroom.
500
00:20:48,373 --> 00:20:50,083
No, Erin,
I respect your privacy,
501
00:20:50,125 --> 00:20:51,668
but I will follow you in here
[toilet flushes]
502
00:20:51,710 --> 00:20:53,837
Every time you go
if that's what it takes.
503
00:20:53,878 --> 00:20:55,088
Hey, Creed.
504
00:20:55,130 --> 00:20:58,299
Not cool, man.
505
00:20:58,341 --> 00:20:59,926
[whispers]
I really think you should leave.
506
00:20:59,968 --> 00:21:02,387
Someday, you are going to tell
our grandchildren
507
00:21:02,429 --> 00:21:03,596
about how their grandfather
won you back
508
00:21:03,638 --> 00:21:04,806
in a women's room.
509
00:21:04,848 --> 00:21:05,932
Gabe, can we talk
about this later?
510
00:21:05,974 --> 00:21:07,350
I have to go.
I have to go.
511
00:21:07,392 --> 00:21:09,102
Just read the letter
under your windshield wiper.
512
00:21:09,144 --> 00:21:10,353
Okay? It explains everything.
513
00:21:10,395 --> 00:21:11,855
- Okay.
- Okay?
514
00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:13,440
- Do you want--
- Gabe!
515
00:21:13,481 --> 00:21:14,399
Well.
516
00:21:15,942 --> 00:21:17,193
Here's the thing, Rory.
517
00:21:17,235 --> 00:21:19,404
I think you guys would
hit it off in an odd way.
518
00:21:19,446 --> 00:21:21,531
I could bring him
a welcome basket.
519
00:21:21,573 --> 00:21:22,782
I'll surprise him.
520
00:21:22,824 --> 00:21:24,743
Okay, well, you should
give him a little time
521
00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:25,910
to settle in, but...
522
00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:27,287
Does he like jams?
523
00:21:27,328 --> 00:21:28,913
My shelves are
overflowing with preserves.
524
00:21:28,955 --> 00:21:32,334
Well, no,
he hates jams.
525
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:39,007
[both laughing]
526
00:21:42,218 --> 00:21:44,471
Got you, Rory.
527
00:21:44,512 --> 00:21:45,472
Darryl.
528
00:21:45,513 --> 00:21:46,556
Hey.
529
00:21:46,598 --> 00:21:48,016
I would like to give you
530
00:21:48,058 --> 00:21:50,769
the only copy
of Somehow I Manage,
531
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:52,395
unfinished.
532
00:21:52,437 --> 00:21:54,689
If there's anybody here
who can finish it, it's you.
533
00:21:54,731 --> 00:21:56,232
[laughs]
534
00:21:56,274 --> 00:21:57,942
That's sweet, Mike.
535
00:21:57,984 --> 00:22:01,071
Let's see here.
536
00:22:01,112 --> 00:22:04,074
Here's a chapter called
"Gum."
537
00:22:04,115 --> 00:22:06,326
- Mmm.
- With one sentence.
538
00:22:06,368 --> 00:22:08,787
"Everybody likes the guy who
offers them a stick of gum."
539
00:22:08,828 --> 00:22:11,331
Mm-hmm. It's true.
540
00:22:11,373 --> 00:22:12,582
I mean...
541
00:22:12,624 --> 00:22:14,334
that's for realers.
542
00:22:14,376 --> 00:22:15,794
Ah, I see
you've been practicing.
543
00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:17,420
- Mm-hmm.
- You can use that in Colorado.
544
00:22:17,462 --> 00:22:18,672
That state is 90% Black.
545
00:22:18,713 --> 00:22:20,507
It is? I didn't know that.
546
00:22:20,548 --> 00:22:21,966
Hmm.
547
00:22:22,008 --> 00:22:24,678
Darryl,
I have one last wish.
548
00:22:24,719 --> 00:22:26,471
I would like
to use the baler.
549
00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:27,847
No.
550
00:22:27,889 --> 00:22:29,140
Can't let you do that, Mike.
551
00:22:29,182 --> 00:22:30,183
- No problem.
- Sorry.
552
00:22:30,225 --> 00:22:31,643
- Worth a try.
- All right.
553
00:22:31,685 --> 00:22:33,812
Darryl said I could use
the baler because I'm leaving.
554
00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:35,021
No.
555
00:22:37,982 --> 00:22:41,986
All right, guys, well,
556
00:22:42,028 --> 00:22:45,740
see ya later, warehouse.
557
00:22:45,782 --> 00:22:48,034
Catch you
on the flippety-flip.
558
00:22:51,746 --> 00:22:53,581
All right then,
559
00:22:53,623 --> 00:22:55,083
see you guys.
560
00:22:55,125 --> 00:22:57,335
Catch you later, warehouse.
561
00:22:57,377 --> 00:23:00,922
See you
on the flippety-flip.
562
00:23:00,964 --> 00:23:03,258
Catch you
on the flippety-flip.
563
00:23:06,428 --> 00:23:10,265
Catch you guys
on the flippety-flip.
564
00:23:10,306 --> 00:23:11,433
Come on.
565
00:23:11,474 --> 00:23:13,893
[exhales] Okay.
So what's our approach?
566
00:23:13,935 --> 00:23:15,186
You a veteran?
567
00:23:15,228 --> 00:23:16,396
Do I have a month to live?
568
00:23:16,438 --> 00:23:19,399
You gonna get married
tomorrow? What?
569
00:23:19,441 --> 00:23:20,817
Hmm?
570
00:23:20,859 --> 00:23:23,111
I thought we'd just talk
about our customer service
571
00:23:23,153 --> 00:23:27,240
and exceptional paper quality.
572
00:23:27,282 --> 00:23:29,617
That's stupid.
[laughing]
573
00:23:29,659 --> 00:23:31,202
Well, what do I know?
574
00:23:31,244 --> 00:23:33,413
I know.
What do you know?
575
00:23:33,455 --> 00:23:34,539
We gotta get psyched up.
576
00:23:34,581 --> 00:23:36,041
Okay, guy?
577
00:23:36,082 --> 00:23:37,834
Let's get psyched.
578
00:23:37,876 --> 00:23:39,961
Is there an animal shelter
on the way?
579
00:23:41,629 --> 00:23:42,756
Yeah.
580
00:23:42,797 --> 00:23:43,882
Awesome!
581
00:23:43,923 --> 00:23:45,633
Ani-ani-shelto.
582
00:23:45,675 --> 00:23:47,802
- [laughs]
- Here we come.
583
00:23:47,844 --> 00:23:49,429
Andy, do you know
how to high-five?
584
00:23:49,471 --> 00:23:50,513
Yeah.
585
00:23:50,555 --> 00:23:51,931
'Cause if you do,
now's the time.
586
00:23:51,973 --> 00:23:53,099
All right.
587
00:23:53,141 --> 00:23:55,060
Not while I'm driving.
588
00:23:55,101 --> 00:23:57,062
Catch you guys...
589
00:23:57,103 --> 00:24:00,398
[forklift engine rumbling]
590
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:02,859
Catch you guys
on the flippety-flip.
591
00:24:04,652 --> 00:24:06,780
Flippety-flip.
592
00:24:06,821 --> 00:24:09,407
[sighing]
593
00:24:09,449 --> 00:24:10,867
Flippety-flip.
594
00:24:13,870 --> 00:24:15,663
Really?
595
00:24:15,705 --> 00:24:18,166
Okay, see you guys.
596
00:24:25,131 --> 00:24:26,758
You know how I met
Jo Bennett
597
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:29,052
and got started
on my ladder of success?
598
00:24:29,094 --> 00:24:30,428
No, I don't.
599
00:24:32,597 --> 00:24:36,267
Walkin' along,
out of work... again,
600
00:24:36,309 --> 00:24:38,103
thinking to myself,
601
00:24:38,144 --> 00:24:40,021
I've only got enough cash
to buy a sandwich
602
00:24:40,063 --> 00:24:41,648
or get drunk.
603
00:24:41,690 --> 00:24:43,983
And I see this guy
604
00:24:44,025 --> 00:24:45,610
trying to steal
this lady's dog.
605
00:24:45,652 --> 00:24:48,530
So I grab the dog,
he runs off.
606
00:24:48,571 --> 00:24:51,783
She's so grateful,
she hires me.
607
00:24:51,825 --> 00:24:53,076
Aw, wow.
608
00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:55,078
Gimme that dog!
609
00:24:55,120 --> 00:24:57,330
It's not your dog!
610
00:24:57,372 --> 00:24:59,249
- Yeah.
- [laughs]
611
00:24:59,290 --> 00:25:01,751
- Again.
- Oh, okay.
612
00:25:01,793 --> 00:25:05,296
Gimme that damn dog,
you [bleep] thief!
613
00:25:05,338 --> 00:25:07,215
It's her dog!
614
00:25:07,257 --> 00:25:08,591
Don't ever do it again!
615
00:25:08,633 --> 00:25:11,011
You hear me?
616
00:25:11,052 --> 00:25:12,137
You feel that energy?
617
00:25:12,178 --> 00:25:13,596
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah?
618
00:25:13,638 --> 00:25:15,807
Whoo! Yeah.
619
00:25:15,849 --> 00:25:17,142
Whoo! Unh!
620
00:25:17,183 --> 00:25:20,437
Okay, again.
621
00:25:20,478 --> 00:25:23,273
I know that Gabe is young
and hot and everything,
622
00:25:23,314 --> 00:25:26,609
and he's begging me
to reconsider,
623
00:25:26,651 --> 00:25:31,448
but I...I just think
I'm in love with someone else.
624
00:25:31,489 --> 00:25:32,824
- Kevin?
- Andy.
625
00:25:32,866 --> 00:25:34,284
Ahh.
626
00:25:34,325 --> 00:25:35,702
I wish I knew
who my birth mother was
627
00:25:35,744 --> 00:25:38,163
so she could just tell me
who to choose.
628
00:25:39,330 --> 00:25:42,042
Maybe neither.
629
00:25:42,083 --> 00:25:43,376
I'm not attracted
to Kevin.
630
00:25:43,418 --> 00:25:44,544
Erin, listen to me.
631
00:25:44,586 --> 00:25:46,338
You shouldn't rush
into this at all.
632
00:25:46,379 --> 00:25:47,589
And you know why?
633
00:25:47,630 --> 00:25:49,591
Because you are beautiful,
634
00:25:49,632 --> 00:25:50,800
and you are fun,
635
00:25:50,842 --> 00:25:51,885
and you are smart.
636
00:25:54,554 --> 00:25:56,014
And when the right guy
comes along,
637
00:25:56,056 --> 00:25:57,557
you'll know it.
638
00:25:57,599 --> 00:25:58,850
You will.
639
00:26:00,643 --> 00:26:01,603
Hey.
640
00:26:03,355 --> 00:26:04,481
And you know what?
641
00:26:04,522 --> 00:26:06,149
You don't need a mom,
642
00:26:06,191 --> 00:26:07,233
because you have
my number
643
00:26:07,275 --> 00:26:08,651
and you can call me anytime.
644
00:26:10,028 --> 00:26:11,279
Extension 147.
645
00:26:11,321 --> 00:26:12,781
- N...
- I know.
646
00:26:12,822 --> 00:26:14,741
Okay. Okay.
647
00:26:20,872 --> 00:26:23,875
Did you want the 2726
or the 2730?
648
00:26:23,917 --> 00:26:25,460
Phyllis?
649
00:26:25,502 --> 00:26:27,170
Phyllis,
are my mittens done?
650
00:26:27,212 --> 00:26:29,047
No. No.
I'm on a sale--
651
00:26:29,089 --> 00:26:31,341
Okay, listen,
it's 2:00 p.m.
652
00:26:31,383 --> 00:26:33,468
From now until 4:00,
your priority is knitting.
653
00:26:33,510 --> 00:26:34,886
Knit like the wind.
654
00:26:34,928 --> 00:26:36,179
Okay.
655
00:26:36,221 --> 00:26:38,890
Dwight, I will be
leaving tomorrow.
656
00:26:38,932 --> 00:26:39,849
Yes?
657
00:26:39,891 --> 00:26:42,185
So I wanted
to give you that.
658
00:26:42,227 --> 00:26:43,478
It's a letter
of recommendation.
659
00:26:51,403 --> 00:26:53,738
This is gonna be good.
660
00:26:53,780 --> 00:26:55,156
Ahem.
661
00:26:55,198 --> 00:26:56,449
"To whom it may concern."
662
00:26:56,491 --> 00:26:58,410
Good, real personal.
Thanks, Michael.
663
00:26:58,451 --> 00:27:00,912
"The dictionary defines
'superlative'
664
00:27:00,954 --> 00:27:03,873
"as 'of the highest kind,
quality, or order,
665
00:27:03,915 --> 00:27:06,835
surpassing all else
or others; supreme.'"
666
00:27:06,876 --> 00:27:08,294
That's great.
667
00:27:08,336 --> 00:27:09,462
If I wanted
the dictionary definition,
668
00:27:09,504 --> 00:27:10,755
I'd buy a dictionary.
669
00:27:10,797 --> 00:27:14,384
"I define it
as Dwight Shrute.
670
00:27:14,426 --> 00:27:16,636
"As a sales executive,
as a leader,
671
00:27:16,678 --> 00:27:20,557
"as a man,
and as a friend,
672
00:27:20,598 --> 00:27:25,061
"he is of the highest kind,
quality, and order;
673
00:27:25,103 --> 00:27:26,730
supreme."
674
00:27:32,277 --> 00:27:33,778
Lots more like that.
675
00:27:33,820 --> 00:27:34,821
Really repetitive.
676
00:27:39,075 --> 00:27:42,579
What's this?
677
00:27:42,620 --> 00:27:44,998
"2:45 behind the building,
paintball."
678
00:27:47,334 --> 00:27:48,918
Ohh!
679
00:28:14,027 --> 00:28:15,904
Aah!
680
00:28:15,945 --> 00:28:17,280
Ah ha ha ha!
681
00:28:17,322 --> 00:28:19,949
No! Ha ha ha ha!
682
00:28:19,991 --> 00:28:21,576
Ow! Ow! Ow!
683
00:28:21,618 --> 00:28:23,870
Come on, come on!
Give it up!
684
00:28:23,912 --> 00:28:25,163
Yaah!
685
00:28:25,205 --> 00:28:27,832
- Ow! Ow!
- [laughing]
686
00:28:29,167 --> 00:28:32,379
[both shouting]
687
00:28:38,551 --> 00:28:40,637
- Are you ready for this?
- Yeah, I guess.
688
00:28:40,679 --> 00:28:43,181
I guess? Hey. Hey.
689
00:28:43,223 --> 00:28:45,892
This is not the time
to be the funny guy, Andy.
690
00:28:45,934 --> 00:28:48,895
Okay? This is the time
to save the dog.
691
00:28:50,522 --> 00:28:52,440
[retches, spits]
692
00:28:52,482 --> 00:28:53,858
Let's go.
693
00:28:58,697 --> 00:29:01,199
I would like to start
by just saying
694
00:29:01,241 --> 00:29:02,784
that I have not worked with
695
00:29:02,826 --> 00:29:05,620
Mr. Andy Bernard here
for very long.
696
00:29:05,662 --> 00:29:09,749
But I can say
that he is no Michael Scott.
697
00:29:09,791 --> 00:29:12,502
I can't sit here and tell you
that he's gonna be a success.
698
00:29:12,544 --> 00:29:14,379
Uh, I can't sit here
and tell you
699
00:29:14,421 --> 00:29:16,256
that he's even
the best man for the job.
700
00:29:16,297 --> 00:29:19,426
But I can say this.
701
00:29:19,467 --> 00:29:21,386
He's got potential.
702
00:29:21,428 --> 00:29:23,680
Sure.
703
00:29:23,722 --> 00:29:26,016
You know, I always say,
"Go big or go home."
704
00:29:26,057 --> 00:29:27,851
You go with this guy,
705
00:29:27,892 --> 00:29:30,603
you could be making the biggest
mistake of your life.
706
00:29:30,645 --> 00:29:34,024
Or the biggest good decision
of your life.
707
00:29:34,065 --> 00:29:35,817
It's either gonna be
the best thing you ever did,
708
00:29:35,859 --> 00:29:39,863
or the worst thing
you ever did.
709
00:29:39,904 --> 00:29:42,323
If you want some boring,
white bread clock-watcher
710
00:29:42,365 --> 00:29:43,992
who's gonna get
you your paper
711
00:29:44,034 --> 00:29:47,412
when you ordered it
for the agreed-upon price,
712
00:29:47,454 --> 00:29:49,831
Andy's not your guy.
713
00:29:49,873 --> 00:29:53,043
If that's what you want,
go with another company.
714
00:29:53,084 --> 00:29:55,962
Pick up the phone right now
and call 'em.
715
00:29:56,004 --> 00:29:57,756
I got a list here.
716
00:29:57,797 --> 00:29:59,424
If you want that--in fact,
I'm gonna leave it
717
00:29:59,466 --> 00:30:01,051
right here anyway--
718
00:30:04,346 --> 00:30:05,638
You ever play
Russian Roulette?
719
00:30:07,515 --> 00:30:10,852
Time to spin
the chamber, Boris...
720
00:30:10,894 --> 00:30:13,605
by signing up
for another year.
721
00:30:16,358 --> 00:30:17,609
Why are we even
thinking cake?
722
00:30:17,650 --> 00:30:20,278
We could do a pie.
We could do a cookie pie.
723
00:30:20,320 --> 00:30:23,490
I just feel that cake
is so Norman Rockwell.
724
00:30:23,531 --> 00:30:26,076
You know, unless we're going
for a Norman Rockwell thing,
725
00:30:26,117 --> 00:30:27,160
in which case, go for it.
726
00:30:27,202 --> 00:30:29,954
Hey, everybody here
loves Jell-O.
727
00:30:29,996 --> 00:30:33,166
You cut it into little cubes,
you chill it just so.
728
00:30:33,208 --> 00:30:36,711
You got teeth or no teeth--
anyone can enjoy it.
729
00:30:36,753 --> 00:30:37,837
How about cupcakes?
730
00:30:37,879 --> 00:30:39,130
- No.
- No cupcakes!
731
00:30:39,172 --> 00:30:40,340
- No.
- Okay.
732
00:30:40,382 --> 00:30:41,508
You guys
are overthinking this.
733
00:30:41,549 --> 00:30:43,426
- Let's just get a cake.
- Exactly.
734
00:30:43,468 --> 00:30:44,928
Now, Darryl,
what if I told you
735
00:30:44,969 --> 00:30:47,389
you could have a cake
that is delicious
736
00:30:47,430 --> 00:30:50,600
and also sexy as hell?
737
00:30:50,642 --> 00:30:51,935
I'm listening.
738
00:30:51,976 --> 00:30:53,436
No smut cakes.
739
00:30:53,478 --> 00:30:55,230
What about fruit?
740
00:30:57,482 --> 00:30:59,734
With yogurt, obviously.
741
00:30:59,776 --> 00:31:01,986
Fruit by itself, gross.
742
00:31:03,863 --> 00:31:05,615
Oh, I know what that meeting
is about.
743
00:31:05,657 --> 00:31:07,367
It's about cake.
744
00:31:07,409 --> 00:31:09,703
And they didn't ask me.
745
00:31:09,744 --> 00:31:13,665
Of all the people to not ask
about cake, they--
746
00:31:15,667 --> 00:31:17,168
[paper slaps desk]
I know what you did.
747
00:31:17,210 --> 00:31:19,796
You invited everyone
into the conference room
748
00:31:19,838 --> 00:31:23,133
to talk about cake,
and I was omitted.
749
00:31:23,174 --> 00:31:24,968
I was omitted!
750
00:31:25,010 --> 00:31:28,680
Did Michael not just talk to
you about being a caricature?
751
00:31:28,722 --> 00:31:31,141
Oh, yeah, I decided
not to be a caricature.
752
00:31:31,182 --> 00:31:32,726
Mm-hmm.
753
00:31:34,227 --> 00:31:35,770
Mm.
754
00:31:35,812 --> 00:31:38,982
This new philosophy
is not going to be easy,
755
00:31:39,024 --> 00:31:42,527
but it's hard
because it's important.
756
00:31:45,155 --> 00:31:46,823
But it could also be hard
757
00:31:46,865 --> 00:31:49,034
because I shouldn't be
doing it.
758
00:31:53,455 --> 00:31:54,998
Uh, what happened to you?
759
00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:56,666
You should see
the other guy.
760
00:32:02,672 --> 00:32:05,008
Jim, where is Pam?
761
00:32:05,050 --> 00:32:07,385
Uh, she's still pricing
the whatevers...
762
00:32:07,427 --> 00:32:08,511
the shredders.
763
00:32:08,553 --> 00:32:10,638
But it is already 3:00.
764
00:32:16,144 --> 00:32:17,270
Right.
765
00:32:31,743 --> 00:32:32,994
Whether you're scared
of dying
766
00:32:33,036 --> 00:32:34,788
or dying alone
767
00:32:34,829 --> 00:32:36,915
or dying drunk
in a ditch,
768
00:32:36,956 --> 00:32:38,458
don't be.
769
00:32:38,500 --> 00:32:39,793
It's going to be okay.
770
00:32:39,834 --> 00:32:41,127
Yeah, I was tripling up.
771
00:32:41,169 --> 00:32:43,129
There's not enough time
in the day
772
00:32:43,171 --> 00:32:45,924
to have a special moment
with everybody.
773
00:32:47,258 --> 00:32:50,136
Actually, Creed, would you mind
giving me back my boots?
774
00:32:50,178 --> 00:32:51,930
I think I'm gonna give 'em
another try.
775
00:32:51,971 --> 00:32:53,640
Uh, I'd like
to help you out, boss,
776
00:32:53,682 --> 00:32:56,976
but it doesn't work that way,
and you know it.
777
00:32:57,018 --> 00:32:59,229
Uh, do you need me?
778
00:32:59,270 --> 00:33:01,356
Yeah, Meredith,
I actually thought
779
00:33:01,398 --> 00:33:03,817
that you and I were going to
have sex as well.
780
00:33:03,858 --> 00:33:05,318
You sure we didn't?
781
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:07,612
No, we didn't,
and I could not
782
00:33:07,654 --> 00:33:09,155
be more proud of that.
783
00:33:09,197 --> 00:33:12,450
I am proud of-of you,
I'm proud of us.
784
00:33:12,492 --> 00:33:14,828
I'm just... we made it.
785
00:33:14,869 --> 00:33:16,287
Dodged a bullet.
786
00:33:16,329 --> 00:33:18,998
Well, it ain't over
till it's over.
787
00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:20,166
Goodbye, dear.
788
00:33:24,045 --> 00:33:26,339
And you,
why are you still here?
789
00:33:26,381 --> 00:33:28,383
I'm either
gonna quit today
790
00:33:28,425 --> 00:33:30,510
or stay to make sure that
Andy's career is destroyed.
791
00:33:30,552 --> 00:33:33,471
No, you are not
going to quit today.
792
00:33:33,513 --> 00:33:34,889
For goodness sake,
793
00:33:34,931 --> 00:33:37,017
this is not going to be
your last day at the office.
794
00:33:37,058 --> 00:33:40,520
[sighs]
Everybody gets dumped, Gabe.
795
00:33:40,562 --> 00:33:42,105
Can I give you
a piece of advice?
796
00:33:43,565 --> 00:33:45,233
A little cover-up
on your Adam's apple
797
00:33:45,275 --> 00:33:47,110
will make it appear smaller,
798
00:33:47,152 --> 00:33:49,404
which will make you look less
like a transvestite.
799
00:33:52,032 --> 00:33:54,242
[clicks tongue]
800
00:34:00,999 --> 00:34:02,417
That is cold, sir.
801
00:34:02,459 --> 00:34:03,710
Absolutely cold.
You know what?
802
00:34:03,752 --> 00:34:05,462
It was a complete waste
of my time.
803
00:34:09,924 --> 00:34:12,427
Uh, Deangelo,
I'm, uh...
804
00:34:12,469 --> 00:34:14,387
I forgot my bag,
so I'm gonna...
805
00:34:14,429 --> 00:34:17,557
- I'll meet you in the car.
- Okay, whatever.
806
00:34:17,599 --> 00:34:18,641
Sir.
807
00:34:19,976 --> 00:34:23,313
I'd just like to apologize
for that.
808
00:34:23,355 --> 00:34:25,190
I could tell you that he has
a steel plate in his head,
809
00:34:25,231 --> 00:34:26,900
or that he's crazy,
810
00:34:26,941 --> 00:34:30,570
but the truth is, I think
he's just a terrible salesman.
811
00:34:30,612 --> 00:34:34,407
And I want you to know
that if you re-up with us,
812
00:34:34,449 --> 00:34:37,202
anything you need,
day or night,
813
00:34:37,243 --> 00:34:39,371
I will be the one
to take your call.
814
00:34:41,539 --> 00:34:43,124
Keep talkin'.
815
00:34:45,794 --> 00:34:47,545
Yes.
816
00:34:47,587 --> 00:34:49,172
Okay. All right.
817
00:34:49,214 --> 00:34:50,632
No. Well, thank you.
818
00:34:50,674 --> 00:34:52,384
Thank you. All right.
819
00:34:52,425 --> 00:34:53,968
Take care.
820
00:34:54,010 --> 00:34:55,887
You'll never guess.
We did it.
821
00:34:55,929 --> 00:34:57,097
Hey!
822
00:34:57,138 --> 00:34:58,306
[laughing]
823
00:34:58,348 --> 00:34:59,766
Ha ha!
824
00:34:59,808 --> 00:35:01,643
Ohh! All right.
825
00:35:03,478 --> 00:35:05,146
All right.
826
00:35:05,188 --> 00:35:07,649
- Good job, boss.
- We did it. Yeah.
827
00:35:07,691 --> 00:35:08,692
Ohh.
828
00:35:13,154 --> 00:35:15,699
Okay, everybody, come on.
829
00:35:15,740 --> 00:35:17,450
Conference room, five seconds!
Here we go!
830
00:35:17,492 --> 00:35:19,327
Hurry up!
Let's do this!
831
00:35:22,330 --> 00:35:24,624
Yes.
What is this about?
832
00:35:24,666 --> 00:35:26,167
- What is this meeting about?
- Mm-hmm.
833
00:35:26,209 --> 00:35:27,877
All right.
834
00:35:27,919 --> 00:35:30,130
Well...
835
00:35:30,171 --> 00:35:33,591
okay. Here we are
in the conference room.
836
00:35:33,633 --> 00:35:34,884
Once again.
837
00:35:34,926 --> 00:35:40,432
And I just wanted
to call you all here together
838
00:35:40,473 --> 00:35:43,309
because I have
something important...
839
00:35:43,351 --> 00:35:44,811
well, there's two things, actually.
840
00:35:44,853 --> 00:35:48,273
Okay, first, I would like
a whereabouts on Pam,
841
00:35:48,314 --> 00:35:52,527
and, secondly, Phyllis,
how are those mittens coming?
842
00:35:52,569 --> 00:35:55,613
Because I would actually like to
bring them home and pack them,
843
00:35:55,655 --> 00:35:57,365
and I am leaving
for the day at 4:00.
844
00:35:57,407 --> 00:35:58,867
They're almost done,
845
00:35:58,908 --> 00:36:01,286
but my knuckles are swelling
a little, and I can't--
846
00:36:01,327 --> 00:36:02,829
Well, power through
the arthritis, Phyllis.
847
00:36:02,871 --> 00:36:04,080
You can do it.
848
00:36:05,999 --> 00:36:08,418
Is that it?
849
00:36:08,460 --> 00:36:09,961
Um, hmm?
850
00:36:10,003 --> 00:36:11,379
Is that it?
851
00:36:17,844 --> 00:36:21,514
Um... hmm.
852
00:36:21,556 --> 00:36:22,640
No.
853
00:36:24,517 --> 00:36:25,894
No.
854
00:36:25,935 --> 00:36:29,314
There's a special guest
that I would like to invite
855
00:36:29,356 --> 00:36:32,359
to say one last goodbye,
so here he comes.
856
00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:33,610
He's coming right in.
857
00:36:33,651 --> 00:36:36,071
[in Asian accent]
Hi, everybody!
858
00:36:36,112 --> 00:36:38,406
It's Ping!
[all groan]
859
00:36:38,448 --> 00:36:40,492
And I'm here to say goodbye
860
00:36:40,533 --> 00:36:42,118
to all you wonderful people.
861
00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:44,954
Thank you, everybody!
862
00:36:44,996 --> 00:36:46,998
You've been so wonderful.
863
00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:49,292
We were such a good--
864
00:36:49,334 --> 00:36:51,044
I "rove" you all.
865
00:36:51,086 --> 00:36:52,337
I "rove" you very much.
866
00:36:52,379 --> 00:36:53,713
Hey, can I talk to you
for a second?
867
00:36:53,755 --> 00:36:56,174
Sure. See you later!
868
00:36:58,218 --> 00:36:59,469
So I've been meaning
to tell you.
869
00:36:59,511 --> 00:37:00,887
I want to take you
out for lunch.
870
00:37:00,929 --> 00:37:01,888
For your last day.
871
00:37:01,930 --> 00:37:03,181
Oh.
872
00:37:03,223 --> 00:37:04,516
What do you think?
Tomorrow? Lunch?
873
00:37:04,557 --> 00:37:06,726
- You and me?
- Okay.
874
00:37:08,895 --> 00:37:11,356
You're not leaving tomorrow.
875
00:37:11,398 --> 00:37:13,191
You're leaving today, right?
876
00:37:14,567 --> 00:37:16,319
Maybe.
877
00:37:16,361 --> 00:37:18,071
Wow, so that's it, huh?
878
00:37:18,113 --> 00:37:21,282
Just 4:00
and you are gone for good.
879
00:37:21,324 --> 00:37:23,993
Why am I so sad?
880
00:37:24,035 --> 00:37:26,162
Am I doing the wrong thing?
881
00:37:26,204 --> 00:37:28,790
Absolutely not.
882
00:37:28,832 --> 00:37:32,252
It's just that sometimes
goodbyes are a bitch.
883
00:37:36,214 --> 00:37:39,300
T-shirt idea.
"Goodbyes stink."
884
00:37:41,136 --> 00:37:43,805
Okay. All right. So...
885
00:37:46,307 --> 00:37:48,351
James Halpert...
886
00:37:52,522 --> 00:37:54,774
[voice breaking] You started
with this company...
887
00:37:57,360 --> 00:37:58,862
As a fine young man.
888
00:37:58,903 --> 00:38:01,906
You know what
I think we should do?
889
00:38:01,948 --> 00:38:04,034
I think we should just
save the goodbyes for tomorrow.
890
00:38:04,075 --> 00:38:05,660
At lunch.
891
00:38:05,702 --> 00:38:09,748
Oh. Okay.
892
00:38:09,789 --> 00:38:14,252
And then tomorrow
I can tell you...
893
00:38:14,294 --> 00:38:15,628
[clears throat]
894
00:38:15,670 --> 00:38:18,381
What a great boss
you turned out to be.
895
00:38:21,176 --> 00:38:23,303
Best boss I ever had.
896
00:38:25,347 --> 00:38:26,973
[horn honks]
897
00:38:27,015 --> 00:38:28,350
Oh, shoot.
898
00:38:28,391 --> 00:38:29,934
That's my cab.
899
00:38:29,976 --> 00:38:31,269
- All right.
- All right.
900
00:38:31,311 --> 00:38:33,480
Listen, Michael, I really--
901
00:38:33,521 --> 00:38:35,148
I did text Pam, but...
902
00:38:35,190 --> 00:38:36,733
I know. It's okay.
903
00:38:36,775 --> 00:38:38,693
Just give her a hug,
all right?
904
00:38:40,612 --> 00:38:42,238
I will see you
tomorrow at lunch.
905
00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:45,200
I am looking forward
to lunch.
906
00:38:45,241 --> 00:38:47,744
And hearing about
what a great boss I am.
907
00:38:49,162 --> 00:38:50,455
You got it.
908
00:38:53,041 --> 00:38:54,542
Okay.
909
00:38:56,294 --> 00:38:57,712
Okay.
910
00:39:01,925 --> 00:39:03,259
[sighs]
911
00:39:09,265 --> 00:39:10,725
Phyllis.
912
00:39:10,767 --> 00:39:12,352
Mm-hmm.
Oh, they're still not done.
913
00:39:12,394 --> 00:39:14,938
Oh, no, no, no.
Let me see.
914
00:39:14,979 --> 00:39:19,984
Oh, Phyllis.
Nice try.
915
00:39:20,026 --> 00:39:21,361
I love 'em.
916
00:39:45,593 --> 00:39:47,762
See ya tomorrow, boss.
917
00:39:47,804 --> 00:39:49,014
Later, guys.
918
00:40:01,276 --> 00:40:02,402
- all: Hey!
- What's going on?
919
00:40:02,444 --> 00:40:04,112
- all: Hey!
- Michael.
920
00:40:04,154 --> 00:40:05,447
What happened?
921
00:40:05,488 --> 00:40:06,948
What is the--
922
00:40:32,057 --> 00:40:33,558
Hey, you know what, Hank?
923
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:37,645
Why don't you give me
a small cup of coffee to go?
924
00:40:39,981 --> 00:40:42,400
That will be $6.
925
00:40:42,442 --> 00:40:44,986
Hmm. Well, okay.
926
00:40:45,028 --> 00:40:46,780
Why don't you just
take it out of the 20?
927
00:40:46,821 --> 00:40:49,657
So... now I'm buying you
coffee?
928
00:40:49,699 --> 00:40:51,493
That's still a $14 tip.
929
00:40:53,995 --> 00:40:56,998
I cannot believe that you are
my last goodbye.
930
00:41:00,669 --> 00:41:03,129
Holly's my family now.
931
00:41:03,171 --> 00:41:04,923
She's my family.
932
00:41:04,964 --> 00:41:07,133
And the babies
that I make with her
933
00:41:07,175 --> 00:41:09,052
will be my children.
934
00:41:09,094 --> 00:41:12,138
The people that you work with
are just,
935
00:41:12,180 --> 00:41:17,602
when you get down to it,
your very best friends.
936
00:41:17,644 --> 00:41:19,813
They say on your deathbed
937
00:41:19,854 --> 00:41:23,900
you never wish you spent
more time at the office,
938
00:41:23,942 --> 00:41:25,068
but I will.
939
00:41:25,110 --> 00:41:29,197
Got to be a lot better
than a deathbed.
940
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:32,534
I actually
don't understand deathbeds.
941
00:41:32,575 --> 00:41:35,036
I mean,
who would buy that?
942
00:41:37,539 --> 00:41:41,835
Well, I guess this is it.
943
00:41:41,876 --> 00:41:44,921
Hey, will you guys let me know
if this ever airs?
944
00:41:44,963 --> 00:41:46,923
Thank you.
945
00:41:46,965 --> 00:41:48,675
All right. Oh.
946
00:41:50,385 --> 00:41:53,388
This is gonna feel so good
947
00:41:53,430 --> 00:41:55,640
getting this thing
off my chest.
948
00:41:58,059 --> 00:42:00,687
[no audio]
949
00:42:39,434 --> 00:42:41,227
No, he wasn't sad.
950
00:42:41,269 --> 00:42:43,521
He was full of hope.
951
00:42:43,563 --> 00:42:45,398
About Colorado.
952
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:47,400
And he was hoping
to get an upgrade
953
00:42:47,442 --> 00:42:48,818
as an awards member.
954
00:42:50,820 --> 00:42:52,739
And he said
he was just real excited
955
00:42:52,781 --> 00:42:55,408
to get home and see Holly.
956
00:42:55,450 --> 00:42:58,536
[jet engines whooshing]
957
00:43:08,546 --> 00:43:10,131
How I feel
about Michael leaving.
958
00:43:10,173 --> 00:43:13,510
I can tell you what I'll tell
everyone who asks.
959
00:43:13,551 --> 00:43:17,681
I can confirm that he
worked here during those dates.
960
00:43:17,722 --> 00:43:20,225
And that...
961
00:43:20,266 --> 00:43:22,435
yeah.
962
00:43:22,477 --> 00:43:24,270
Michael once asked me
if gay guys
963
00:43:24,312 --> 00:43:26,940
squeeze each other's boobs.
964
00:43:26,981 --> 00:43:29,901
[laughs]
I'll never forget that.
965
00:43:29,943 --> 00:43:36,366
Michael had quite a way
with words.
966
00:43:36,408 --> 00:43:40,078
And now you can play clips
of him messing up words.
967
00:43:40,120 --> 00:43:42,747
Or not--I'm not gonna tell you
how to do your job.
968
00:43:42,789 --> 00:43:44,165
I'm sorry, can we just talk
about the way
969
00:43:44,207 --> 00:43:45,709
that Ryan was acting today?
970
00:43:45,750 --> 00:43:48,545
He gets into this whole aloof
"don't talk to me" mood,
971
00:43:48,586 --> 00:43:50,296
but then if I ignore him,
he gets angry
972
00:43:50,338 --> 00:43:52,048
because I ignored him all day.
973
00:43:52,090 --> 00:43:53,425
So then I do
finally talk to him,
974
00:43:53,466 --> 00:43:54,843
and then he's all, like, broody,
975
00:43:54,884 --> 00:43:56,052
and it's one-syllable grunts.
976
00:43:56,094 --> 00:43:57,429
I--tell me what
I'm supposed to do, Ryan.
977
00:43:57,470 --> 00:43:58,430
Just tell me.
978
00:44:04,644 --> 00:44:06,521
- Did he say where...
- I have no idea.
979
00:44:06,563 --> 00:44:08,398
Well,
if he's not gonna make it,
980
00:44:08,440 --> 00:44:11,735
at least we should go ahead
and eat the cake.
981
00:44:11,776 --> 00:44:14,362
Yeah.
982
00:44:14,404 --> 00:44:17,115
I, for one,
love the corners.
983
00:44:25,665 --> 00:44:27,250
Why did I just do that?
984
00:44:27,292 --> 00:44:29,252
This is not even that good.
985
00:44:29,294 --> 00:44:31,546
I don't even--
I don't even want it.
986
00:44:33,715 --> 00:44:35,300
I had cake for lunch.
987
00:44:38,970 --> 00:44:40,180
No, you know what?
I've been good.
988
00:44:40,221 --> 00:44:42,265
I deserve this.
989
00:44:42,307 --> 00:44:44,559
Oh.
Oh, um...
990
00:44:44,601 --> 00:44:45,810
What am I doing?
991
00:44:45,852 --> 00:44:47,437
Come on, Deangelo.
992
00:44:47,479 --> 00:44:48,688
Hey...
993
00:44:53,943 --> 00:44:56,029
No!
994
00:44:56,071 --> 00:44:58,031
Uh-oh.
995
00:44:58,073 --> 00:44:59,366
No!
66888
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