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1
00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:11,428
[phone rings]
2
00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:18,768
Happy Halloween, everyone.
3
00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:21,438
Oh, that's great. Hey.
4
00:00:21,479 --> 00:00:23,314
Happy Halloween.
5
00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:24,983
Jan called.
6
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:28,319
O...kay.
7
00:00:28,361 --> 00:00:32,407
I know why she's calling.
8
00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:33,491
It's the end of the month,
9
00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:35,368
and I was supposed
to let somebody go
10
00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:37,037
by the end of the month.
11
00:00:37,078 --> 00:00:38,455
[sighs]
12
00:00:38,496 --> 00:00:40,749
And somehow I'm supposed
to put on a costume and smile.
13
00:00:40,790 --> 00:00:42,500
[dialing]
14
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:44,336
Okay.
15
00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:45,670
(female receptionist)
Jan Levinson's office.
16
00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:47,839
Hey, Sherri,
Michael Scott returning.
17
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,382
Oh, she's in a meeting.
18
00:00:49,424 --> 00:00:52,218
She just wanted the name
of the employee you let go.
19
00:00:52,260 --> 00:00:53,845
Well, I'm gonna wait 'til
the end of the day.
20
00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:54,804
Because the book said
it's best to wait
21
00:00:54,846 --> 00:00:56,431
until the end of the day.
22
00:00:56,473 --> 00:00:58,850
I just need the name of who
you're planning to let go.
23
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:02,020
I...don't... know... yet.
24
00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:03,688
I will have to call her back.
25
00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:06,816
I know she wanted the name.
26
00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:08,443
Okay, Sherri?
27
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:09,903
Yeah?
28
00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:13,656
If you were getting fired,
how would you wanna be told
29
00:01:13,698 --> 00:01:15,158
so that you could
still be friends
30
00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:18,495
with the person firing you?
31
00:01:18,536 --> 00:01:20,872
Jan wants the name as soon
as possible, Michael.
32
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:22,749
Thanks.
Mmm-hmm.
33
00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:25,377
I'll call her back.
34
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:28,213
Wish I could fire Sherri.
35
00:01:28,254 --> 00:01:29,964
Hey, I'm still here. Okay.
36
00:01:30,006 --> 00:01:31,549
I'm sorry. Yeah.
37
00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:32,634
No?
Okay.
38
00:01:32,676 --> 00:01:36,179
Bye.
Hanging up now.
39
00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:40,225
[light rock music]
40
00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:47,190
♪ ♪
41
00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:18,179
I thought you were gonna come
as something scarier this year.
42
00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:22,475
Well, I'm a black cat.
43
00:02:22,517 --> 00:02:23,977
They're bad luck.
44
00:02:24,019 --> 00:02:25,603
I just think
it's a little silly.
45
00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:28,314
We said scarier costumes,
and no one did it.
46
00:02:28,356 --> 00:02:31,526
I did it, and I'm never
gonna do it again,
47
00:02:31,568 --> 00:02:32,861
that's for sure.
48
00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:35,572
No, you look cute. Yeah.
49
00:02:35,613 --> 00:02:38,783
I mean,
you even did your hands.
50
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:41,703
No, I didn't.
51
00:02:57,010 --> 00:03:00,013
Hey, you.
52
00:03:00,055 --> 00:03:03,350
Big Jim.
53
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:06,102
Phyllis, working hard, Phyllis?
54
00:03:06,144 --> 00:03:08,605
Of course,
you're always working hard.
55
00:03:08,646 --> 00:03:10,357
Keep it up.
56
00:03:10,398 --> 00:03:13,318
And there's Stanley.
No costume?
57
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:16,363
Well, no, not trying to fit in.
58
00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:18,948
I wish I had your confidence.
I really do.
59
00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:21,368
Something wrong, Michael?
No, no.
60
00:03:21,409 --> 00:03:23,328
What could possibly be wrong?
61
00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:24,913
Everything's great.
62
00:03:24,954 --> 00:03:28,375
Just keep living your lives.
63
00:03:28,416 --> 00:03:31,127
Everything's gonna be fine.
64
00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:35,215
[sighs]
65
00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:42,806
You are all such wonderful,
innocent people.
66
00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:59,572
I mean, you hear
about layoffs in the news,
67
00:03:59,614 --> 00:04:01,658
but when you actually have
to do it yourself,
68
00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:03,493
it is heavy stuff.
69
00:04:03,535 --> 00:04:04,953
It's--
70
00:04:04,994 --> 00:04:08,081
I mean, these are people's
lives you're talking about.
71
00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:11,793
You wanted me?
Yes.
72
00:04:17,298 --> 00:04:19,509
Papier-mâché?
Yes.
73
00:04:19,551 --> 00:04:21,428
Yesh.
Hmm.
74
00:04:21,469 --> 00:04:26,349
Um, Pam I have
to let somebody go today.
75
00:04:26,391 --> 00:04:29,310
This is the hardest thing
I've ever had to do.
76
00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:31,479
Why did you put it off
until Halloween?
77
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:33,898
Because it's very scary stuff.
78
00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:36,276
Well, I think it's gonna put
a damper on the party a little.
79
00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:37,610
You're worried about the party?
80
00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:39,112
There's a man's
life at stake here.
81
00:04:39,154 --> 00:04:41,531
So it's a man?
No.
82
00:04:41,573 --> 00:04:44,075
Or a woman.
A human life.
83
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,286
If you had to guess,
84
00:04:46,327 --> 00:04:49,831
who would it be,
based on their job performance?
85
00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:52,208
And who do you think
deserves to be fired?
86
00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:53,460
Who would that be?
87
00:04:53,501 --> 00:04:56,629
I just answer the phone.
88
00:04:56,671 --> 00:05:01,468
And sometimes you just let
it go to voice mail.
89
00:05:05,597 --> 00:05:08,808
Your costume is fantastic.
90
00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:11,644
I know.
[laughs]
91
00:05:11,686 --> 00:05:14,647
I sent away for it
in July from a catalog.
92
00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:15,899
[laughs]
93
00:05:15,940 --> 00:05:18,151
Oh, no.
Don't, don't, don't, don't.
94
00:05:18,193 --> 00:05:19,652
Aah.
95
00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:20,695
[both laugh]
96
00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:21,780
Okay.
97
00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:25,950
Oh, man.
Okay, I have to fire somebody.
98
00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:32,499
What is that?
What are you supposed to be?
99
00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:36,336
I'm a three-hole punch
version of Jim.
100
00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:37,629
'Cause he can have me
either way.
101
00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:40,215
Plain white Jim,
or three-hole punch.
102
00:05:40,256 --> 00:05:42,842
That's great.
(Jim) Oh, yeah.
103
00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:45,887
Yeah, well, look.
What about me?
104
00:05:45,929 --> 00:05:48,264
[imitates light saber sound]
105
00:05:48,306 --> 00:05:51,726
What are you?
A monk?
106
00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:53,770
I am a Sith Lord.
107
00:05:56,231 --> 00:05:57,691
(Dwight)
Oh, big deal.
108
00:05:57,732 --> 00:06:00,777
Three round pieces of paper
taped to his shirt.
109
00:06:00,819 --> 00:06:04,572
This cost me $129.
110
00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:06,741
Ass.
111
00:06:25,427 --> 00:06:27,554
Hey, you guys excited
about the party?
112
00:06:27,595 --> 00:06:30,849
It's gonna be fun. Yeah.
113
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:34,060
Oh, look at you.
Showing your colors.
114
00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:36,229
Bet you wish you wore
a dress every day.
115
00:06:36,271 --> 00:06:37,605
What are you implying?
116
00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:39,816
All good.
Happy Halloween.
117
00:06:39,858 --> 00:06:41,109
What happened
118
00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:43,069
to all those spooky
decorations that we had?
119
00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:45,030
The cobwebs and such?
120
00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,449
I don't know.
We put them all up last night.
121
00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:50,785
[loud vacuum]
122
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:53,163
Well, you know what?
Go buy some more.
123
00:06:53,204 --> 00:06:54,539
I'll approve
the overages.
124
00:06:54,581 --> 00:06:56,082
Sound good?
Yeah.
125
00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:57,834
Good.
126
00:06:57,876 --> 00:07:02,797
Oh, yeah, also,
about budget stuff,
127
00:07:02,839 --> 00:07:04,257
um, I'm gonna need you
to find like a--
128
00:07:04,299 --> 00:07:08,678
a full employee salary
plus benefits, like 50 grand.
129
00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:10,847
I'm gonna need you to find
50 grand in the numbers.
130
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:12,640
But we don't keep two cents--
131
00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:14,100
Well, that's not
what I'm saying.
132
00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:15,435
Just, you know, find it.
133
00:07:15,477 --> 00:07:18,313
Pretend that your
jobs depend on it.
134
00:07:24,694 --> 00:07:26,488
Mmm-hm-hmm.
135
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,948
Interesting take on Dorothy.
I love it.
136
00:07:28,990 --> 00:07:30,867
Hey, you know what would
even be better?
137
00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:32,702
Soccer ball and cleats.
138
00:07:32,744 --> 00:07:34,037
Why is that?
139
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:35,413
Bend It Like Beckham.
140
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,374
Oh, like, the movie
about the Indian girl
141
00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:39,000
who plays soccer?
142
00:07:39,042 --> 00:07:40,460
Yeah.
143
00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:42,253
That would be perfect.
144
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:44,839
Yeah, I mean, I guess
I could do that.
145
00:07:44,881 --> 00:07:47,550
I don't really play soccer
or anything.
146
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:50,303
Well, I don't really
have two heads, so.
147
00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:55,266
Today, by the end of today?
148
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:56,810
I wish I could take this off.
149
00:07:56,851 --> 00:07:59,646
I'm just not feeling this
right now at all.
150
00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:02,023
I need this special stuff
to wipe the glue off,
151
00:08:02,065 --> 00:08:07,320
and I left it at home, so...
152
00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:09,823
I hope I'm not fired.
153
00:08:09,864 --> 00:08:12,492
Wait, what are you again?
Oh, right.
154
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:14,160
Three-hole punch!
155
00:08:14,202 --> 00:08:17,455
[cackles]
156
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,000
Okay, greatest strength.
157
00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:22,002
Okay, okay.
158
00:08:22,043 --> 00:08:24,170
A doglike obedience
to authority.
159
00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:25,630
Nice.
160
00:08:25,672 --> 00:08:28,341
That doesn't sound good.
Okay, okay.
161
00:08:28,383 --> 00:08:32,053
Um, how 'bout
the ultimate team player?
162
00:08:32,095 --> 00:08:34,180
Dwight is special,
163
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:37,183
but I don't believe that his
talents are being used
164
00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:38,518
in this office.
165
00:08:38,560 --> 00:08:40,687
So Pam and I have
put his résumé
166
00:08:40,729 --> 00:08:44,399
on monster.com, Google, craigslist.
167
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:46,860
We're really interested
most in jobs
168
00:08:46,901 --> 00:08:48,653
that take Dwight
out of state.
169
00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:51,489
Um, preferably Alaska.
Or India.
170
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:54,200
He's a gun nut. Mmm.
171
00:08:54,242 --> 00:08:57,620
Sticks to his guns.
172
00:08:57,662 --> 00:09:03,043
Hey, Jim.
What's up, Hef?
173
00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:04,419
Michael?
174
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,755
What?
Oh, what?
175
00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:07,964
Michael, do you have the name
176
00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:10,050
of the employee
you're letting go?
177
00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:13,053
I'd like to start working
on outplacement.
178
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:14,929
Fine.
179
00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:17,474
If you are so anxious
to see a head roll,
180
00:09:17,515 --> 00:09:19,726
it's you.
181
00:09:19,768 --> 00:09:22,312
There,
you brought it on yourself.
182
00:09:22,354 --> 00:09:23,980
Too bad.
183
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:26,775
Can't say that I'm sorry.
It's a relief.
184
00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:28,443
I don't report to you, Michael.
185
00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:29,986
I report to the head of HR
in New York.
186
00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:32,072
You asked for a name.
I gave you a name.
187
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:34,866
Now you're not doing your job.
Why don't you just resign?
188
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,659
They would just
send someone else.
189
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:38,661
You need to have
an HR representative.
190
00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:42,040
Just know that
if I could have fired you,
191
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:44,125
I would have.
192
00:09:44,167 --> 00:09:46,461
I know, Michael.
193
00:09:46,503 --> 00:09:48,713
Well, I looked through
all the budgets.
194
00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:50,465
And there is one department...
Yes?
195
00:09:50,507 --> 00:09:52,092
that has three people...
Yeah?
196
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:54,260
Doing the work that could
be done by two.
197
00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:55,220
This is great.
198
00:09:57,013 --> 00:10:00,266
Oh.
199
00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:04,187
Yeah. Oh.
200
00:10:04,229 --> 00:10:07,440
[knocking]
Yeah?
201
00:10:07,482 --> 00:10:09,484
Can I come in, Lord Scott?
202
00:10:09,526 --> 00:10:12,904
Mm-hmm.
203
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:18,952
So who's it gonna be?
204
00:10:18,993 --> 00:10:20,704
Someone from accounting?
Good choice.
205
00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,622
No, there is no downsizing.
206
00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:25,166
Michael, everyone knows
there's downsizing,
207
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:28,503
and everyone is scared.
208
00:10:31,381 --> 00:10:33,299
It's my costume.
It's too eerie.
209
00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,135
Mine's scarier.
210
00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:36,636
Irrelevant but wrong.
211
00:10:36,678 --> 00:10:38,555
Who do you think
it should be? Jim, definitely.
212
00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:39,723
No, Jim brings in money.
213
00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,641
Phyllis.
Eh.
214
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:45,562
Stanley. Pam.
Oscar. Meredith.
215
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:48,356
Kevin. Angela.
216
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:50,108
It's not a popularity contest.
217
00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:52,986
Although it does make sense
to fire the least popular,
218
00:10:53,028 --> 00:10:56,865
because it has the least
effect on morale.
219
00:10:56,906 --> 00:10:58,867
One of the warehouse guys.
220
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:01,703
What?
221
00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,913
There was someone
left off that list?
222
00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:05,874
Who?
Who is he saying?
223
00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,709
[exhales like Darth Vader]
224
00:11:07,751 --> 00:11:10,170
You're right.
I didn't even think of him.
225
00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:12,172
No, Michael.
226
00:11:12,213 --> 00:11:13,965
Yeah, that's actually
a really good idea.
227
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:17,052
No, not me.
Yeah, I could.
228
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:18,678
Not Dwight.
229
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:19,929
I'm not saying
that's what he said.
230
00:11:19,971 --> 00:11:21,556
I know that's what he said.
231
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,683
What?
232
00:11:23,725 --> 00:11:25,769
Tell him not Dwight.
233
00:11:25,810 --> 00:11:27,937
That is not a very nice
thing to say about him.
234
00:11:27,979 --> 00:11:29,647
Tell him to stop.
Are you kidding?
235
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:30,857
Quiet you.
236
00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,692
I agree.
He'd land on his feet.
237
00:11:32,734 --> 00:11:34,569
Make him be quiet.
238
00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:39,657
Those aren't chips and dip.
239
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:41,618
No, I made brownies.
240
00:11:41,659 --> 00:11:43,244
[scoffs]
241
00:11:43,286 --> 00:11:44,954
What?
242
00:11:44,996 --> 00:11:47,665
I'm just trying to figure out
why you're sabotaging things.
243
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:49,959
I made brownies.
244
00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:55,048
And I made cookies.
Same category.
245
00:11:55,090 --> 00:11:58,968
I'm guessing Angela's the one
in the neighborhood
246
00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:04,224
who gives the trick-or-treaters
some toothbrushes.
247
00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:06,476
Pennies.
248
00:12:06,518 --> 00:12:08,561
Walnuts.
249
00:12:08,603 --> 00:12:11,231
Dunder Mifflin,
this is Pam.
250
00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,733
Uh, yeah.
251
00:12:13,775 --> 00:12:15,735
Just one second.
252
00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:18,697
I will transfer you
to our manager, Michael Scott.
253
00:12:20,323 --> 00:12:23,243
[Jim's phone rings]
254
00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:24,828
[sighs]
255
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:27,080
Michael Scott here.
256
00:12:27,122 --> 00:12:31,668
Yes, I am regional manager
of this orifice.
257
00:12:31,710 --> 00:12:33,753
Mmm-hmm.
258
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:36,673
Dwight Schrute is amazing.
259
00:12:36,715 --> 00:12:38,717
Yeah.
260
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:41,553
No, he is actually the single
greatest employee
261
00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:43,430
of his generation.
262
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:44,931
Mmm-hmm.
263
00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:46,641
You know what?
I'm gonna tell you what.
264
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:48,893
You hire Dwight K. Schrute,
265
00:12:48,935 --> 00:12:51,187
and he does not meet, nay,
266
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:55,650
exceed every one
of your wildest expectations,
267
00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:57,777
well, then you can hold me,
268
00:12:57,819 --> 00:13:00,572
Michael Gary Scott,
269
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:03,199
personally and financially responsible.
270
00:13:03,241 --> 00:13:05,201
Okay. Okay.
271
00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:07,203
Okay-kay-kay-kay.
272
00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:08,663
Okay.
273
00:13:13,877 --> 00:13:16,296
Stanley, could you come
with me, please.
274
00:13:16,338 --> 00:13:20,800
No.
275
00:13:20,842 --> 00:13:22,594
As assistant regional manager--
276
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:24,596
To the--
Look.
277
00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:26,598
I've got some bad news.
278
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:27,766
You're fired.
279
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:29,642
You need to pack up
your things and go.
280
00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:32,187
[laughs]
I'm serious, Stanley.
281
00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:34,481
It's over, I'm sorry.
282
00:13:34,522 --> 00:13:36,441
You're fired.
283
00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:38,234
Get your fingers off my phone.
284
00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:42,822
[laughs harder]
285
00:13:42,864 --> 00:13:46,409
So, how did it go with Stanley?
286
00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:47,827
How--how'd he take it?
287
00:13:47,869 --> 00:13:49,704
He wouldn't listen to me.
Oh, come on.
288
00:13:49,746 --> 00:13:50,997
If you wanna fire him,
289
00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:52,207
you're gonna have
to tell him yourself.
290
00:13:52,248 --> 00:13:54,292
I don't wanna fire Stanley.
I never said that.
291
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:57,170
I'm certainly not going
to do it myself.
292
00:13:57,212 --> 00:14:00,632
Get those big, baleful
eyes staring at me.
293
00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:02,258
Yikes.
294
00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:04,511
Okay, just--
295
00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:07,681
Cumberland Mills?
296
00:14:07,722 --> 00:14:10,725
And how did you get
my résumé?
297
00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:12,519
Oh, no, no.
I'm very flattered.
298
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:13,937
Don't get me wrong.
299
00:14:13,978 --> 00:14:16,690
I'm just not sure
that it's my official resume,
300
00:14:16,731 --> 00:14:19,693
or if it's something
that maybe
301
00:14:19,734 --> 00:14:23,279
a satisfied customer
posted online.
302
00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:26,741
What does it say under
martial arts training?
303
00:14:26,783 --> 00:14:30,120
Oh, okay, I'm gonna have
to supplement that.
304
00:14:30,161 --> 00:14:32,580
Could I have your fax number?
305
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,708
(Dwight)
Would I ever leave this company?
306
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:36,626
Look, I'm all about loyalty.
307
00:14:36,668 --> 00:14:38,003
In fact, I feel like
308
00:14:38,044 --> 00:14:40,588
part of what I'm getting
paid for here is my loyalty.
309
00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:42,966
(Dwight)
But if there were somewhere else
310
00:14:43,008 --> 00:14:45,552
that valued that loyalty
more highly,
311
00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:49,973
I'm going wherever
they value loyalty the most.
312
00:14:50,015 --> 00:14:52,559
I am going to have
to do this Soprano style,
313
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,185
just whack 'em.
314
00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:55,937
Guys, could you take
the freight elevator please?
315
00:14:55,979 --> 00:14:57,564
Hey, you want to see
a really messed up show,
316
00:14:57,605 --> 00:14:58,648
follow us around.
You know what?
317
00:14:58,690 --> 00:14:59,607
That's my foot!
Come to our office.
318
00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:01,026
Ass, ass, ass!
You guys!
319
00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:02,736
Ass, ass, ass!
Hi, Mom!
320
00:15:02,777 --> 00:15:05,864
Ass, ass, ass!
Ass, ass, ass, ass!
321
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:08,283
I will handle it
in the best way possible,
322
00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:11,077
but in case he
or she goes postal,
323
00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:13,413
you will be available
to subdue.
324
00:15:13,455 --> 00:15:15,040
Am I correct?
325
00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:17,876
Who is it?
I don't know.
326
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:20,170
Hey, are you on our payroll,
327
00:15:20,211 --> 00:15:22,172
or are you employed
by the building?
328
00:15:22,213 --> 00:15:24,841
Building.
Oh, shoot.
329
00:15:24,883 --> 00:15:28,303
Okay, well, just have
your pepper spray ready.
330
00:15:28,345 --> 00:15:31,681
You're on your own.
331
00:15:31,723 --> 00:15:33,683
All right, all right,
this is it.
332
00:15:33,725 --> 00:15:35,018
By the time I get back
to our floor,
333
00:15:35,060 --> 00:15:37,562
I will have decided.
334
00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:40,440
Wow, that's a fast elevator.
335
00:15:40,482 --> 00:15:44,277
I have a proposal, everybody.
Listen up.
336
00:15:44,319 --> 00:15:48,698
Now, corporate has been really
breathing down my neck
337
00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:51,826
to make some pay cuts,
but I refuse to fire anyone,
338
00:15:51,868 --> 00:15:55,997
so I was thinking that maybe
339
00:15:56,039 --> 00:15:59,292
all of you would
take a 10% pay cut,
340
00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:02,545
and that would save the money, yeah?
341
00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:05,465
Yeah, we're not doing that.
342
00:16:05,507 --> 00:16:09,344
I have kids in college.
Make a decision.
343
00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:11,304
Okay, great, fine.
344
00:16:11,346 --> 00:16:15,475
Well then,
if anyone is annoyed later
345
00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:18,937
at what goes down,
you know who to blame--Stanley,
346
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:23,233
not the guy who was trying
to be creative.
347
00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:25,527
Michael, it's almost 5:00.
348
00:16:25,568 --> 00:16:28,363
Leave me alone, okay?
349
00:16:30,824 --> 00:16:32,909
Oh, hey.
350
00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,453
Oh, your dress is stuck
in the back.
351
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:38,248
Oh.
352
00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:43,169
So you got the fax?
353
00:16:43,211 --> 00:16:45,547
So why didn't you add it
to the res--
354
00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:47,007
What do you mean?
355
00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:48,341
Of course martial arts training
is relevant.
356
00:16:48,383 --> 00:16:50,135
Oh, excuse me.
357
00:16:50,176 --> 00:16:52,846
I know about a billion Asians
that would beg to differ.
358
00:16:52,887 --> 00:16:55,473
Uh, yeah, I get
a little frustrated
359
00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:57,225
when I'm dealing
with incompetence.
360
00:16:57,267 --> 00:16:59,060
Well, you know what?
You can go to hell too.
361
00:16:59,102 --> 00:17:01,479
And I will see you there... burning.
362
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:03,231
Fine. Okay, wait.
363
00:17:03,273 --> 00:17:05,900
So you'll let me know
when you've made a decis--
364
00:17:09,904 --> 00:17:12,157
Jim is really talented.
365
00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:15,827
And he should be the one who's
getting a better job offer.
366
00:17:15,869 --> 00:17:16,870
Like, for real.
367
00:17:16,911 --> 00:17:18,371
Don't take this the wrong way,
368
00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:21,958
but you should go
for that job.
369
00:17:25,128 --> 00:17:28,631
Um, it's in Maryland.
370
00:17:28,673 --> 00:17:30,759
Yeah.
371
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:32,177
But, I mean,
look at the salary.
372
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,763
And it's definitely
a step up.
373
00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:37,182
And a challenge.
374
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:42,145
Yeah.
375
00:17:43,355 --> 00:17:46,399
Yeah, you know what?
Maybe--
376
00:17:46,441 --> 00:17:50,320
Maybe I will.
377
00:17:52,030 --> 00:17:54,491
Jim...
378
00:17:54,532 --> 00:17:59,162
This is called leveraging
an offer.
379
00:17:59,204 --> 00:18:02,624
Michael, can I talk
to you for a moment? Oh, God.
380
00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:04,292
I just thought you should know
381
00:18:04,334 --> 00:18:08,213
that I was just offered
a job with better pay,
382
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:11,883
better benefits and a better
title at Cumberland Mills.
383
00:18:11,925 --> 00:18:13,093
Fantastic.
384
00:18:13,134 --> 00:18:14,386
And I turned it down.
385
00:18:14,427 --> 00:18:17,138
What? That would've
solved all my problems.
386
00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:19,516
Out of loyalty
to this company...
387
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:21,226
Oh, you idiot.
388
00:18:21,267 --> 00:18:23,728
So I was hoping to be made
assistant regional manager.
389
00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:26,564
If you left, I wouldn't have
to fire anybody.
390
00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:28,191
But then you wouldn't
have me here.
391
00:18:28,233 --> 00:18:30,819
Big deal, oh, it would've
worked out so well.
392
00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:32,070
Can you get it back?
393
00:18:32,112 --> 00:18:33,113
It's in Maryland.
394
00:18:33,154 --> 00:18:34,698
You can call.
Can you call 'em?
395
00:18:34,739 --> 00:18:37,450
I can't--I suppose I--no.
396
00:18:37,492 --> 00:18:39,160
They never really made me
an offer anyway.
397
00:18:39,202 --> 00:18:41,663
[growls]
Why are you torturing me?
398
00:18:41,705 --> 00:18:45,417
God.
399
00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:48,962
Honestly, I don't think that
Michael has the slightest clue
400
00:18:49,004 --> 00:18:50,672
of who he's going to fire.
401
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:52,799
I think he keeps hoping that
someone's going to volunteer.
402
00:18:52,841 --> 00:18:56,511
Uh, or be run over
by a bus before the deadline.
403
00:18:56,553 --> 00:18:58,388
But in the end, really what's
going to happen is
404
00:18:58,430 --> 00:19:00,140
it's gonna be the first
person to give him
405
00:19:00,181 --> 00:19:01,224
a dirty look in the hall.
406
00:19:01,266 --> 00:19:02,809
[clicks tongue]
407
00:19:02,851 --> 00:19:05,895
And therein lies the true
essence of his charisma.
408
00:19:05,937 --> 00:19:07,147
[clears throat]
409
00:19:07,188 --> 00:19:09,649
Can I speak to you a minute?
410
00:19:09,691 --> 00:19:13,278
Um... yes.
411
00:19:38,136 --> 00:19:39,262
Michael, I really
didn't mean to--
412
00:19:39,304 --> 00:19:41,389
Help me.
413
00:19:41,431 --> 00:19:42,849
I'm sorry?
414
00:19:42,891 --> 00:19:45,060
I want you to role
play firing me.
415
00:19:45,101 --> 00:19:47,437
I want you to fire me,
and I will take it.
416
00:19:47,479 --> 00:19:49,564
Oh, you want me
to be you? Yes.
417
00:19:49,606 --> 00:19:51,691
I want you to be me,
and I will be Creed.
418
00:19:51,733 --> 00:19:53,443
Oh, are you firing Creed?
No, no.
419
00:19:53,485 --> 00:19:57,405
No, that's just first--thing.
Can't--in head.
420
00:19:57,447 --> 00:19:59,574
We should switch seats
in order to...
421
00:19:59,616 --> 00:20:03,119
Yes, that's a good idea.
422
00:20:03,161 --> 00:20:05,246
Excuse me.
423
00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:08,375
[clears throat]
424
00:20:08,416 --> 00:20:11,670
I'm really sorry,
but I have to let you go.
425
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:14,089
And it's purely budgetary.
426
00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:15,590
It's not personal--
427
00:20:15,632 --> 00:20:18,301
[screams]
I'm gonna kill myself!
428
00:20:18,343 --> 00:20:19,427
Wow.
429
00:20:19,469 --> 00:20:21,179
I'm going to kill myself!
430
00:20:21,221 --> 00:20:22,514
And it's your fault!
431
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,099
That's an overreaction.
432
00:20:24,140 --> 00:20:25,767
Corporate is really
breathing down my neck.
433
00:20:25,809 --> 00:20:27,602
And they're saying
this has to be done
434
00:20:27,644 --> 00:20:29,104
by the end of the month.
435
00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:31,523
Is this you? Are you being you,
or is this Creed?
436
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:35,652
I--this is Creed.
437
00:20:35,694 --> 00:20:38,905
Okay.
I'm improvising, so just try to keep up.
438
00:20:38,947 --> 00:20:40,448
[phone rings]
And I'm very angry.
439
00:20:40,490 --> 00:20:42,117
Hold that thought.
Creed?
440
00:20:42,158 --> 00:20:44,160
Michael Scott here.
I'm gonna kill you for firing me.
441
00:20:44,202 --> 00:20:45,829
Toby? Mmm-hmm?
442
00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:48,039
I really have to take this,
Creed, so it was really worth--
443
00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:49,833
Get off, get off.
No, no.
444
00:20:56,297 --> 00:20:59,175
Just, just--yeah.
[sighs]
445
00:20:59,217 --> 00:21:00,301
[door closes]
446
00:21:00,343 --> 00:21:02,345
What happened?
447
00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:04,180
It wasn't me. Oh.
448
00:21:04,222 --> 00:21:05,598
That was, like, crazy.
449
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:08,351
I know.
'Cause I was--
450
00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:17,861
Uh, hey, Creed?
451
00:21:17,902 --> 00:21:19,320
Huh?
452
00:21:19,362 --> 00:21:21,031
Could I talk to you
for a second?
453
00:21:27,996 --> 00:21:33,335
Do you want some coffee?
No, no, I had some, thanks.
454
00:21:33,376 --> 00:21:35,754
Oh, wow.
455
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:38,423
How long have you worked here?
How many years, Creed?
456
00:21:38,465 --> 00:21:41,176
15 years, I think.
Yeah, that's right.
457
00:21:41,217 --> 00:21:45,013
15 years and 3 months.
458
00:21:45,055 --> 00:21:47,974
Wow, you were hired
before I was.
459
00:21:48,016 --> 00:21:50,143
You must be thinking
about retirement.
460
00:21:50,185 --> 00:21:53,104
Oh, no, I need the money.
461
00:21:53,146 --> 00:21:55,065
Why?
What do you mean, why?
462
00:21:55,106 --> 00:21:58,693
It's just that you
never got married,
463
00:21:58,735 --> 00:22:01,571
and you live in an apartment.
464
00:22:01,613 --> 00:22:03,365
I don't know.
I've got nephews.
465
00:22:03,406 --> 00:22:04,699
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
466
00:22:04,741 --> 00:22:07,202
And I buy 'em stuff, you know?
467
00:22:07,243 --> 00:22:09,704
Oh, made some bad investments.
468
00:22:09,746 --> 00:22:11,831
Why are you asking me this?
469
00:22:11,873 --> 00:22:13,750
Just trying to be your friend.
470
00:22:13,792 --> 00:22:16,419
Well, you never asked me
about my life before is all.
471
00:22:16,461 --> 00:22:18,963
Of course I did.
I always--yes, I do.
472
00:22:19,005 --> 00:22:21,466
Mm, do you have something
specific you wanted
473
00:22:21,508 --> 00:22:23,218
to talk to me about?
474
00:22:23,259 --> 00:22:25,387
Are you pulling my leg, or...
475
00:22:25,428 --> 00:22:27,055
No.
476
00:22:27,097 --> 00:22:28,932
You have no clue why
I've asked you in here.
477
00:22:28,973 --> 00:22:30,392
I do not.
478
00:22:30,433 --> 00:22:33,978
Okay, well, here's the deal.
479
00:22:34,020 --> 00:22:36,356
You are great.
480
00:22:36,398 --> 00:22:38,274
Very ambitious.
481
00:22:38,316 --> 00:22:40,485
And I feel like you want more
482
00:22:40,527 --> 00:22:42,779
than this little office
has to offer.
483
00:22:42,821 --> 00:22:45,240
And I understand that you'd
wanna just spread your wings
484
00:22:45,281 --> 00:22:47,659
and fly the coop.
485
00:22:47,701 --> 00:22:49,202
What are you telling me?
486
00:22:49,244 --> 00:22:52,664
We're gonna have to--
You--you want something better.
487
00:22:52,706 --> 00:22:55,250
No, I don't.
I wanna stay right here.
488
00:22:55,291 --> 00:22:57,252
No, you wanna leave.
489
00:22:57,293 --> 00:22:59,337
No, I wanna stay here.
490
00:22:59,379 --> 00:23:01,047
Why are you making this
so hard?
491
00:23:01,089 --> 00:23:02,841
I think there's
a misunderstanding, Michael.
492
00:23:02,882 --> 00:23:04,134
I think you're right.
493
00:23:04,175 --> 00:23:07,095
Can I go?
No, of course, you can't go.
494
00:23:07,137 --> 00:23:11,266
We haven't even started
this horrible process of--
495
00:23:11,307 --> 00:23:13,351
Okay, Creed,
496
00:23:13,393 --> 00:23:18,106
I need to let somebody
go today.
497
00:23:18,148 --> 00:23:21,109
They told me I need
to let somebody go.
498
00:23:21,151 --> 00:23:23,194
And as much as I think
you're a great guy,
499
00:23:23,236 --> 00:23:27,282
and I like you,
you're--you're, good-bye.
500
00:23:27,323 --> 00:23:28,950
Let's fight it.
501
00:23:28,992 --> 00:23:30,243
Hmm?
502
00:23:30,285 --> 00:23:31,619
Let's call Jan,
and fight this thing together
503
00:23:31,661 --> 00:23:32,912
like the old days.
504
00:23:32,954 --> 00:23:34,372
What old days?
What are you talking about?
505
00:23:34,414 --> 00:23:35,957
Did you start
the paperwork yet?
506
00:23:35,999 --> 00:23:37,792
It's right here
on the desk, yeah.
507
00:23:37,834 --> 00:23:39,294
You don't have to do this, Michael.
508
00:23:39,336 --> 00:23:41,212
I can't--
Undo it!
509
00:23:41,254 --> 00:23:42,714
(Michael)
I can't change anything.
510
00:23:42,756 --> 00:23:44,424
(Creed)
No, you have the power to undo it.
511
00:23:44,466 --> 00:23:46,092
You undo it.
512
00:23:46,134 --> 00:23:48,345
Michael, undo it.
513
00:23:48,386 --> 00:23:49,763
Yeah, I went hunting once.
514
00:23:49,804 --> 00:23:51,765
Shot the deer
in the leg.
515
00:23:51,806 --> 00:23:54,559
Had to kill it with a shovel.
Took about an hour.
516
00:23:54,601 --> 00:23:55,810
Why do you ask?
517
00:23:55,852 --> 00:23:57,729
I have to fire
someone today.
518
00:23:57,771 --> 00:23:59,731
Okay?
Fine.
519
00:23:59,773 --> 00:24:03,610
Fire someone else.
Fire Devon, he's terrible.
520
00:24:03,651 --> 00:24:06,196
I am so much better
at my job than Devon.
521
00:24:06,237 --> 00:24:08,323
Okay, well,
I already picked you.
522
00:24:08,365 --> 00:24:09,699
And you know that.
523
00:24:09,741 --> 00:24:11,910
So, unless I just
go through with this,
524
00:24:11,951 --> 00:24:13,453
you're always gonna look at me
525
00:24:13,495 --> 00:24:14,871
as the guy
who almost fired you.
526
00:24:14,913 --> 00:24:17,707
No, no, no, no, no.
I will forget so fast.
527
00:24:17,749 --> 00:24:19,167
You will be my savior.
528
00:24:19,209 --> 00:24:22,337
You're the guy who
gave me my life back.
529
00:24:22,379 --> 00:24:24,673
Thank you.
530
00:24:24,714 --> 00:24:26,675
I knew you'd see my way,
Michael, God bless you.
531
00:24:26,716 --> 00:24:28,510
You're a fine man.
Don't...
532
00:24:28,551 --> 00:24:30,178
Listen, you will not regret
this either.
533
00:24:30,220 --> 00:24:32,138
Devon's terrible.
No one's gonna miss him.
534
00:24:32,180 --> 00:24:35,809
[imitates Durante]
Good, good, good.
535
00:24:51,491 --> 00:24:55,286
Devon, could I talk
to you for a sec?
536
00:24:55,328 --> 00:24:57,872
Creed's an idiot.
You know that. Well, he...
537
00:24:57,914 --> 00:25:00,458
No, no, no, no, no, you had it
right the first time.
538
00:25:00,500 --> 00:25:02,544
Well, maybe I did. Exactly.
539
00:25:02,585 --> 00:25:04,629
You gotta go
with your gut, man.
540
00:25:04,671 --> 00:25:06,548
Huh. Well...
541
00:25:06,589 --> 00:25:09,217
No, I can't--
No.
542
00:25:09,259 --> 00:25:11,094
I can't go back.
I would look like an idiot.
543
00:25:11,136 --> 00:25:13,054
That's why I'm being fired?
No.
544
00:25:13,096 --> 00:25:14,806
So you might not look
like an idiot? No.
545
00:25:14,848 --> 00:25:16,516
It was all
the stuff that I said.
546
00:25:16,558 --> 00:25:19,394
It was the business downturn,
the cutbacks, and, and--
547
00:25:19,436 --> 00:25:21,187
This is unbelievable!
548
00:25:21,229 --> 00:25:24,607
I just hope that you
and I can remain friends.
549
00:25:26,526 --> 00:25:29,279
(Michael)
Devon, wait... please.
550
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:31,656
Look, look.
551
00:25:31,698 --> 00:25:35,410
In addition to severance,
and everything,
552
00:25:35,452 --> 00:25:39,789
I want to give you
553
00:25:39,831 --> 00:25:41,958
this gift certificate
to Chili's.
554
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:44,461
From me.
555
00:25:44,502 --> 00:25:47,380
Okay? No hard feelings.
556
00:25:49,466 --> 00:25:52,552
Kevin, Jim, Pam, Kelly,
557
00:25:52,594 --> 00:25:55,055
Toby, Oscar, Meredith,
558
00:25:55,096 --> 00:25:57,307
Phyllis, Stanley, or the temp.
559
00:25:57,349 --> 00:25:59,476
If any of you wanna meet me
for a drink,
560
00:25:59,517 --> 00:26:00,935
I'm gonna be
at Poor Richard's.
561
00:26:00,977 --> 00:26:05,065
And the rest of you
can go to hell.
562
00:26:10,487 --> 00:26:13,406
What about the Halloween party?
563
00:26:16,409 --> 00:26:18,495
(Pam)
Oh, hey, Jim. Wait, stop.
564
00:26:18,536 --> 00:26:21,498
Um, I'm sorry
565
00:26:21,539 --> 00:26:24,501
for pushing you
toward Cumberland.
566
00:26:25,418 --> 00:26:28,296
Seriously, if you left here,
I would blow my brains out.
567
00:26:28,338 --> 00:26:31,007
[both laugh]
568
00:26:31,049 --> 00:26:32,676
Come on.
569
00:26:32,717 --> 00:26:35,136
(Jim)
That's just a figure of speech, you know?
570
00:26:35,178 --> 00:26:37,013
Blow your brains out?
Come on.
571
00:26:37,055 --> 00:26:39,182
All it really means
is that we're friends.
572
00:26:39,224 --> 00:26:41,434
I mean, who else
is she gonna talk to
573
00:26:41,476 --> 00:26:43,395
if I'm gone, right?
574
00:26:43,436 --> 00:26:46,147
I mean, if she left I wouldn't
blow my brains out.
575
00:26:46,189 --> 00:26:48,900
Of course, I would take
that job in Maryland.
576
00:26:48,942 --> 00:26:50,819
Because it's double the pay,
577
00:26:50,860 --> 00:26:52,904
and soft shell crab
just happens
578
00:26:52,946 --> 00:26:55,031
to be my favorite food.
579
00:27:01,746 --> 00:27:03,790
This is Jan.
His name was Devon.
580
00:27:03,832 --> 00:27:05,250
Excuse me?
581
00:27:05,291 --> 00:27:09,087
The human being man's name
was Devon.
582
00:27:09,129 --> 00:27:10,338
Devon.
583
00:27:10,380 --> 00:27:13,383
D--oh, is the man that you--
Yes.
584
00:27:13,425 --> 00:27:15,010
The person that you fired,
Michael, is that--
585
00:27:15,051 --> 00:27:18,179
Yes, it is. Okay.
586
00:27:18,221 --> 00:27:21,725
You sound a little upset.
587
00:27:21,766 --> 00:27:24,853
Well, I am a little, justifiably.
588
00:27:24,894 --> 00:27:28,314
My Halloween is ruined.
589
00:27:28,356 --> 00:27:31,234
Well, I have to say
that I'm impressed.
590
00:27:31,276 --> 00:27:34,654
Michael, I know how hard
that was.
591
00:27:34,696 --> 00:27:37,657
Do you?
I don't think you do.
592
00:27:37,699 --> 00:27:40,869
Devon was one
of my best buddies,
593
00:27:40,910 --> 00:27:44,956
and now he hates me.
594
00:27:44,998 --> 00:27:46,833
Well, I'm glad you did it, Michael.
595
00:27:46,875 --> 00:27:49,044
You're glad.
And so, good job.
596
00:27:49,085 --> 00:27:51,212
Thanks, thanks so much.
You think it was good?
597
00:27:51,254 --> 00:27:53,006
Think I did a good job?
Yeah, great job.
598
00:27:53,048 --> 00:27:54,799
Great, I feel good.
599
00:27:54,841 --> 00:27:56,801
I'm gonna give myself a pat
on the back.
600
00:27:56,843 --> 00:27:59,179
There, I'm doing it,
right there.
601
00:27:59,220 --> 00:28:00,555
Great.
602
00:28:00,597 --> 00:28:03,975
I destroyed a man today.
603
00:28:04,017 --> 00:28:05,894
This morning Devon walked
in thinking he was
604
00:28:05,935 --> 00:28:08,355
on top of the world,
605
00:28:08,396 --> 00:28:12,400
and it's like I shot him.
606
00:28:12,442 --> 00:28:16,946
It's like I shot him
in the stomach
607
00:28:16,988 --> 00:28:21,618
with a cannon.
608
00:28:21,659 --> 00:28:25,080
[gags]
Excuse me.
609
00:28:41,054 --> 00:28:44,140
Oh, please turn that off.
Please turn it off.
610
00:28:44,182 --> 00:28:46,142
You're supposed to be a cat?
611
00:28:46,184 --> 00:28:47,852
Yes.
612
00:28:47,894 --> 00:28:49,437
You know, guys,
613
00:28:49,479 --> 00:28:53,066
Michael has really incredible
decision-making abilities.
614
00:28:53,108 --> 00:28:55,568
Michael's really incredible
at making decisions.
615
00:28:55,610 --> 00:28:58,321
Yeah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
616
00:29:00,573 --> 00:29:02,951
Pussy.
617
00:29:02,992 --> 00:29:05,787
Here, pussy, pussy, pussy.
618
00:29:05,829 --> 00:29:07,497
Pussy, pussy.
619
00:29:07,539 --> 00:29:08,957
Meow.
620
00:29:08,998 --> 00:29:13,294
You people are revolting.
621
00:29:13,336 --> 00:29:17,924
By far, the least popular
people here.
622
00:29:17,966 --> 00:29:23,013
I should have fired you.
623
00:29:23,054 --> 00:29:28,935
Who knew Devon was so popular,
had so many friends,
624
00:29:28,977 --> 00:29:31,771
was so well-loved.
625
00:29:31,813 --> 00:29:34,065
(Dwight)
I feel like I made the right choice.
626
00:29:34,107 --> 00:29:35,358
Things happen for a reason.
627
00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:37,652
I wasn't destined to go
to Cumberland Mills.
628
00:29:37,694 --> 00:29:42,323
Just like Anakin Skywalker was
destined to become Darth Vader,
629
00:29:42,365 --> 00:29:45,994
I am destined to sell paper
here at Dunder Mifflin.
630
00:29:46,036 --> 00:29:48,580
That's what I was put
on this Earth to do.
631
00:29:48,621 --> 00:29:50,290
(Michael)
I love Halloween.
632
00:29:50,331 --> 00:29:52,000
You, know it's just--
it's just fun.
633
00:29:52,042 --> 00:29:54,127
Every year, it's just fun.
634
00:29:54,169 --> 00:29:56,755
Last Halloween,
I came as Janet Jackson's boob.
635
00:29:56,796 --> 00:29:58,381
[scoffs]
636
00:29:58,423 --> 00:29:59,883
It was topical.
637
00:29:59,924 --> 00:30:01,509
People got a big
kick out of it.
638
00:30:01,551 --> 00:30:04,304
The year before that,
I came as Monica Lewinsky.
639
00:30:04,346 --> 00:30:08,516
And I wore a stained dress.
640
00:30:08,558 --> 00:30:10,935
The year before that,
I also came as Monica Lewinsky.
641
00:30:10,977 --> 00:30:13,146
And before that,
I was O.J.
642
00:30:13,188 --> 00:30:15,148
It was pretty funny.
643
00:30:15,190 --> 00:30:17,067
Oh, I wish you were here
last year.
644
00:30:22,822 --> 00:30:23,948
[doorbell]
645
00:30:25,325 --> 00:30:27,494
(children)
Trick or treat!
646
00:30:27,535 --> 00:30:28,953
[laughs]
Hey!
647
00:30:28,995 --> 00:30:30,246
How you doin'? Wow!
648
00:30:30,288 --> 00:30:31,915
You guys look great.
649
00:30:31,956 --> 00:30:33,458
I'm a bumblebee.
650
00:30:33,500 --> 00:30:35,210
You look great.
651
00:30:35,251 --> 00:30:36,878
And you're a princess?
652
00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:38,421
A fairy princess.
653
00:30:38,463 --> 00:30:40,382
You're very--
I'm a lion.
654
00:30:40,423 --> 00:30:42,384
You're a lion.
Wow, I want to hear your--
655
00:30:42,425 --> 00:30:44,511
Oh, okay, that's all yours.
That's all yours.
656
00:30:44,552 --> 00:30:46,846
Grab it, grab it.
You know what?
657
00:30:46,888 --> 00:30:48,515
You guys are getting
all of these.
658
00:31:14,416 --> 00:31:16,501
Quiet, you.
45961
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