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1
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I know why I've waited
2
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Know why I've been blue
3
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Praying each night for someone
4
00:00:40,124 --> 00:00:43,918
Exactly like you
5
00:00:44,837 --> 00:00:48,297
Why should we spend money
6
00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:52,051
On a show or two
7
00:00:52,136 --> 00:00:55,513
No one does those love scenes
8
00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:58,391
Exactly like you
9
00:00:58,475 --> 00:01:01,894
You make me feel so grand
10
00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:05,690
I wanna hand the world to you
11
00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:09,402
You seem to understand
12
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Each foolish little scheme
I'm schemin'
13
00:01:13,115 --> 00:01:16,075
Dream I'm dreamin'
14
00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:19,746
Now I know why Mother
15
00:01:19,830 --> 00:01:23,583
Taught me to be true
16
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:27,253
She meant me for someone
17
00:01:27,337 --> 00:01:30,757
Exactly like you
18
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:40,141
Hollywood, California, city of contrasts.
19
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Home to the rich and powerful
20
00:01:42,811 --> 00:01:45,605
yet so popular
with the broken and destitute.
21
00:01:45,689 --> 00:01:49,901
Here sex hunger is reflected
in every aspect of daily life
22
00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:53,696
and instant gratification
is tirelessly pursued.
23
00:01:55,032 --> 00:01:58,493
A center of casual violence
and capricious harassment
24
00:01:58,577 --> 00:02:00,870
where rampant vice and amorality
25
00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:03,414
permeate every strata of society
26
00:02:03,499 --> 00:02:07,335
and the barrier between food and sex
has totally dissolved.
27
00:02:09,713 --> 00:02:13,883
It is a known fact that prolonged exposure
to just such a psychopathic environment
28
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:18,304
will eventually warp
even the most normal and decent among us.
29
00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:21,516
This then is the story of Hollywood today.
30
00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:25,812
Not a pretty story,
but presented here exactly as it happened.
31
00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:29,982
Really? Stomach cramps?
32
00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:31,901
But it's such a good buy.
33
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:36,864
Well, so is lighter fluid at $1.50 a pint,
but I wouldn't serve it to my dinner guests.
34
00:02:37,699 --> 00:02:39,075
Forget about Mountain Brook.
35
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,202
My dinner date wouldn't
know the difference anyway.
36
00:02:41,286 --> 00:02:43,329
How about a nice
37
00:02:44,039 --> 00:02:45,456
Beaujolais?
38
00:02:45,541 --> 00:02:48,334
I'm sure it would go
very well with your meat.
39
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:51,087
How much?
3.50, plus tax.
40
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:54,257
All right. I'll take it on your say-so.
41
00:02:55,634 --> 00:02:57,844
Thank you.
42
00:02:59,972 --> 00:03:03,558
Now, you be sure to let me know
if you're not completely satisfied.
43
00:03:03,642 --> 00:03:06,018
With wine, you mean?
44
00:03:06,103 --> 00:03:09,522
Bland, did you refuse to sell that customer
a bottle of Mountain Brook?
45
00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:11,232
I certainly did. It's undrinkable.
46
00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:14,235
I'm not interested in your opinion,
Mr. Gourmet.
47
00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:17,530
If a customer wants a brand of wine
that we carry, that's what he gets.
48
00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:19,866
Mr. Cray, I tried a bottle of Mountain Brook.
It made me sick.
49
00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:21,909
Well, it makes me three times as sick
50
00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:24,745
if I get stuck with those 10 cases
we got piled up downstairs.
51
00:03:24,830 --> 00:03:26,706
I think this man -
And another thing.
52
00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:31,210
Who told you to order a case
of Château Lafite Rothschild?
53
00:03:31,295 --> 00:03:33,421
This stuff goes for $400 a bottle.
54
00:03:33,505 --> 00:03:35,548
We don't have customers
for that kind of item!
55
00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:38,384
You got your head up your ass?
Mr. Cray, I think
56
00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:42,221
Excuse me. One of you gentlemen mind giving
me the money out of that cash register?
57
00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:44,599
What?
I said give me the money out of the register, sucker.
58
00:03:44,683 --> 00:03:46,309
And make it fast!
59
00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:51,939
Mr. Cray, you killed him.
60
00:03:52,024 --> 00:03:53,274
Yeah.
61
00:03:53,358 --> 00:03:55,902
Now how about that Château Lafite?
62
00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:58,404
Dr. Benihana.
63
00:03:58,488 --> 00:04:00,823
Dr. Benihana,
you're wanted in Neurosurgery.
64
00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:03,075
Dr. Benihana.
65
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:05,369
Dr. Benihana,
you're wanted in Neurosurgery.
66
00:04:05,454 --> 00:04:07,955
What's this garbage?
67
00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:11,125
Liver puree, asparagus salad
and mixed fruit mash.
68
00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,668
Make a new man of you.
69
00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:15,087
Christ.
Hey, Mary.
70
00:04:15,172 --> 00:04:18,799
Paul called. He's leaving the liquor store early.
Said he'd pick you up after work.
71
00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:20,801
Okay. Thanks, Sheila.
Paul?
72
00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:23,804
Isn't that the dumpy dude
who came by for you a couple days ago?
73
00:04:23,889 --> 00:04:26,807
Boy, he seems like a giant hard-off.
74
00:04:26,892 --> 00:04:29,769
He happens to be my husband.
75
00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:31,771
Baby, you got a problem.
76
00:04:31,855 --> 00:04:34,106
And we could solve it so easily.
77
00:04:34,191 --> 00:04:36,108
Oh, what's that supposed to mean?
78
00:04:36,193 --> 00:04:39,153
Baby, with a shape like yours,
that's like wasting a natural resource.
79
00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:41,697
Open your mouth.
If I do, will you open your legs?
80
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:44,700
I might do something for you.
81
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,286
If you would do something for me.
82
00:04:47,371 --> 00:04:48,871
Eat that.
83
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:07,682
Dewey.
84
00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:09,475
How would you like to unblock Golden Boy?
85
00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:11,185
Love to.
86
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:16,273
Yuck!
87
00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:21,028
Okay, I'm ready.
I can see you are.
88
00:05:22,197 --> 00:05:24,615
I'll bet you thought
I was gonna run out on you.
89
00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:27,576
No. You know
a good thing when you see it.
90
00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:32,873
Hey, Mary, they want you
down in the kitchen.
91
00:05:32,958 --> 00:05:35,876
I was just about to give Mr. Baker his high colonic.
What?
92
00:05:35,961 --> 00:05:38,879
Don't worry. I'll do it for you.
Oh, Dewey, would you?
93
00:05:38,964 --> 00:05:42,216
But try not to tear anything
like you did last time. Bye.
94
00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:44,218
Hey.
Don't worry. She's just kidding.
95
00:05:44,302 --> 00:05:47,179
Actually, enemas are my specialty.
96
00:05:54,229 --> 00:05:57,148
What a luxury to be picked up.
How was your day?
97
00:05:57,232 --> 00:05:59,859
Not great.
What's wrong?
98
00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:01,861
I have a little headache.
99
00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:05,865
Oh. I hope it goes away when James comes.
100
00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:07,575
That's all right.
101
00:06:07,659 --> 00:06:09,869
We're having
chicken cacciatore tonight.
102
00:06:09,953 --> 00:06:14,040
I hope this place that James found
is gonna be as good as it sounds.
103
00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:17,043
You know, I was thinking about
what we should name it.
104
00:06:17,127 --> 00:06:19,879
I know that you love Chez Bland,
and I do too, but
105
00:06:19,963 --> 00:06:23,883
well, what if we just called it
Paul and Mary's Country Kitchen?
106
00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:09,095
So I have to take her to these parties
and watch her get laid.
107
00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:11,806
Oh, God. Wives are the pits.
Tell me about it.
108
00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:15,935
So, are you two going to the party?
We live here.
109
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:17,937
Too bad.
110
00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:20,022
Excuse us.
Oh?
111
00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:22,691
Hey, you guys, this is the floor.
All right!
112
00:07:24,820 --> 00:07:27,738
Hey, come down to 234. We'll get it on.
113
00:07:27,823 --> 00:07:30,741
You two live in the building. You must swing, right?
Wrong!
114
00:07:30,826 --> 00:07:34,286
Good night.
Well, you don't, but I'll bet anything she does.
115
00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:44,922
This building is beginning to
attract some real scum.
116
00:07:45,006 --> 00:07:47,716
Oh, no. I don't believe it.
117
00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:54,932
$175 a month rent increase?
How are we gonna pay that?
118
00:07:55,016 --> 00:07:58,435
Now, don't worry, honey. We can live on
our InstaCash card for a month or two.
119
00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:01,939
Aren't you forgetting something?
It was canceled last month for nonpayment.
120
00:08:02,023 --> 00:08:05,818
Oh. Well, we still have our jobs.
121
00:08:05,902 --> 00:08:08,320
Oh, no, Paul.
122
00:08:08,405 --> 00:08:10,573
I told him not to buy that cheap wine.
123
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:14,076
Bad wine at a bargain price is no bargain.
But what does he care?
124
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,370
It's not your fault.
125
00:08:16,454 --> 00:08:19,331
We just weren't meant to work
in shops or hospitals.
126
00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:23,335
All those bills and no credit.
What are we gonna
127
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:26,714
Mary, why don't we sell your mother's
collection of fabulous '50s furniture?
128
00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:30,593
Oh, no, Paul. You know Mama
only loaned it to us until she dies.
129
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:35,347
Well, there's that money we set aside
for the down payment on the restaurant.
130
00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:38,684
But that's not gonna keep us for very long.
You'll get another job.
131
00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:41,896
I could get a raise.
We'll get by somehow.
132
00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:44,190
James!
133
00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:48,194
What am I gonna say to him?
Don't say anything to him.
134
00:08:48,278 --> 00:08:51,947
Stall him. I just don't want that
restaurant to slip through our fingers.
135
00:08:53,992 --> 00:08:56,577
James -
How you doin', pal? Am I early or what?
136
00:08:56,661 --> 00:08:59,580
Well, the early bird gets the pussy. Am I right?
Pussy? Now, come on
137
00:08:59,664 --> 00:09:03,042
Jesus, she looks like a party all to herself.
Now come on. Get out of here!
138
00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:05,544
Mister, you'd better get out of here.
139
00:09:05,629 --> 00:09:08,547
If you're not screwing her, somebody's
gonna screw her. Might as well be me, man.
140
00:09:08,632 --> 00:09:10,883
I'll screw you later, sweetheart.
Hey, babe, hey
141
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:13,177
Shouldn't have done that.
142
00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:19,475
Oh, my God!
He's gonna do it again. Quick! Get him in the bathroom.
143
00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:22,603
Come on.
I'm s I'm sorry.
144
00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:25,105
Come on. Come on.
Oh, I'm sorry.
145
00:09:25,190 --> 00:09:26,941
No, no.
146
00:09:27,943 --> 00:09:29,944
Some things are private, man.
147
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:38,619
Well, we've got to spray the room
with something the smell.
148
00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:42,122
I just don't know why
they let swingers in the building.
149
00:09:42,207 --> 00:09:44,333
Because they're so transient,
that's why.
150
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:48,045
They're always pairing up and switching off
and moving in and moving out
151
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:51,048
and the landlords
get to raise the rent every 10 minutes.
152
00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:53,050
Sexual liberation.
153
00:09:53,134 --> 00:09:56,053
Just look what it's brought us.
154
00:09:56,137 --> 00:09:59,765
That is exactly the sort of person we
should refuse to serve in our restaurant.
155
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:06,605
Hello?
156
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,440
What article?
157
00:10:08,525 --> 00:10:11,277
Oh. Bon Appétit. Yeah, that's me.
158
00:10:11,361 --> 00:10:15,239
Yes, I have a few bottles of that.
1948, as a matter of fact.
159
00:10:15,323 --> 00:10:17,992
Oh, no, I don't think
I'd be interested, no.
160
00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:20,452
Well, all right.
I'll tell you what, Mr. Peck.
161
00:10:20,537 --> 00:10:22,705
If I do I'll give you a call.
Okay?
162
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:24,790
Thank you. Good-bye.
163
00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:27,084
Who was that?
164
00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:29,503
Some wine collector from New York
staying at the Wilton.
165
00:10:29,587 --> 00:10:33,507
Wanted to buy some of my Château Lafite.
Fat chance.
166
00:10:33,591 --> 00:10:36,510
That reminds me though -
What are we drinking tonight?
167
00:10:36,594 --> 00:10:39,513
James is from the Valley.
He probably likes Chablis.
168
00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:41,515
James! I forgot all about James.
169
00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:45,060
Paul, we can't have that guy here if James comes.
Hello.
170
00:10:46,855 --> 00:10:49,773
Hello? Can you hear me?
171
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:52,276
Maybe he's asleep.
172
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,861
Hello?
173
00:10:54,571 --> 00:10:56,572
Oh, my God.
174
00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:59,325
Hey, come on. Wake up.
175
00:10:59,409 --> 00:11:02,328
You've got to go now. Come on. Wake up.
176
00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:04,330
Mary, he doesn't seem to be breathing.
177
00:11:04,414 --> 00:11:08,584
Do you think he drowned in the toilet?
Oh! Well, he's not breathing.
178
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,836
What do you think?
179
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,838
He's dead!
Oh, great!
180
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,340
What do we do now?
181
00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:17,343
I don't know! Call the police?
Well, call the police!
182
00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:19,803
Call the police!
Use the emergency number!
183
00:11:21,097 --> 00:11:23,390
I hope they hurry.
184
00:11:23,475 --> 00:11:25,851
Hello. Officer, is this the police?
185
00:11:25,935 --> 00:11:28,854
Yes, wh-who do I speak to
to report a murder?
186
00:11:28,938 --> 00:11:31,690
Not a murder! An accidental death!
187
00:11:31,775 --> 00:11:34,526
Officer, I'm sorry.
An accidental death.
188
00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:37,529
Guess what.
189
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:39,907
No, I think you have the wrong number.
190
00:11:41,242 --> 00:11:44,620
What are you gonna do with him?
Help him find his party.
191
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,955
Come on.
192
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,624
Good luck.
193
00:11:54,297 --> 00:11:56,215
Twice?
194
00:11:56,299 --> 00:11:58,217
Welcome to paradise.
195
00:11:58,301 --> 00:12:01,220
I've got to go.
Oh, come on. What's your hurry?
196
00:12:01,304 --> 00:12:03,806
Look at this place.
It's like a free candy store.
197
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:06,058
And you can eat
any piece you can find.
198
00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:09,061
NNo, thank you. I've really got to go now. My wife
Your wife?
199
00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:11,563
Hey, come on.
How pussy-whipped can you get?
200
00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:14,191
Look around. Look at her!
She's got eyes for you. She digs you.
201
00:12:14,275 --> 00:12:15,734
Really! Roger!
202
00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:17,403
She's your type too.
203
00:12:17,487 --> 00:12:19,321
I've seen it many times before.
Yeah.
204
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,573
But it's not the same one.
205
00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:24,201
Look at what he's stirring his drink with!
206
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:25,577
How gross!
207
00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:28,747
I really have to go.
We're having a friend for dinner.
208
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:31,917
If I don't get back -
Oh, why are you so uptight?
209
00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:35,629
Come on, you're just trying to prevent
yourself from having a good time
210
00:12:35,713 --> 00:12:39,591
from gettin' laid, from gettin' free.
211
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:41,969
Right. G-good night.
212
00:12:42,053 --> 00:12:43,846
Hey.
213
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,270
You look like you need discipline, slave.
214
00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:54,273
I have to go. Really.
We're having a friend to dinner.
215
00:12:54,357 --> 00:12:57,651
Lick my boot, pig!
216
00:12:59,362 --> 00:13:02,573
Paul? James's office called.
217
00:13:03,741 --> 00:13:05,742
He'll be here in 15 minutes.
He
218
00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:08,412
Hello, baby.
Where's Paul?
219
00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:12,207
He's gettin' it on with the Marquise de
Sade, so I thought I'd get it on with you.
220
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,917
What do you say?
No, thank you.
221
00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:15,919
No, thank you?
Is that all you're gonna say?
222
00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:19,131
You're not even gonna help my ego by telling
me you got some weird pussy disease?
223
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:21,717
You get out of here.
Come on, honey!
224
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:23,719
Come on. Listen, don't be that way.
225
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:26,847
Look, underneath these expensive clothes
there's a real, lonely human being.
226
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:29,641
So come on!
Be nice to me! Be nice to me!
227
00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:31,477
No!
228
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:37,983
No! Get off me!
229
00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:40,402
Help! Paul! Help!
230
00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:42,488
Help! Paul!
231
00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,781
Help me! No! No!
232
00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:46,533
Get him off me, Paul!
233
00:13:52,248 --> 00:13:54,166
Paul!
234
00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:57,169
Paul! Stop it! You'll kill him!
235
00:13:57,253 --> 00:13:59,505
You killed him!
236
00:13:59,589 --> 00:14:02,007
What?
He's dead. He's really dead.
237
00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:05,093
Oh, shit. That's all I need.
238
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:08,096
What are we gonna do now?
We can't call the police this time.
239
00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:09,932
I don't know what we're gonna do.
240
00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:12,601
Maybe we could take him out into the
hallway by the swingers' apartment
241
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,978
and they'll think
that he fell down accidentally.
242
00:14:15,063 --> 00:14:19,691
Mary, look at this. This guy is a junior
officer at the Bank of San Fernando.
243
00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:22,194
He must have $600 here.
244
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:24,530
Ed Folsley, Jr., Credit Card Division.
245
00:14:24,614 --> 00:14:27,533
Do you suppose he's the one
that canceled our credit card?
246
00:14:27,617 --> 00:14:29,826
James!
247
00:14:29,953 --> 00:14:33,455
What are we gonna say?
Take the money and put that back where you found it.
248
00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:35,374
But, Mary, what if they
go through the wallet?
249
00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:37,543
What if the police go through the wallet
and find the money missing?
250
00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:39,711
You leave a little bit of the money,
and they don't mind!
251
00:14:39,796 --> 00:14:41,713
I don't want to leave any of the money!
Paul!
252
00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:43,507
Mary, this guy threw up on our carpet.
253
00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:46,218
He canceled our InstaCash card.
He owes us at least $600!
254
00:14:46,302 --> 00:14:48,720
Mary!
Just a minute!
255
00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:52,724
$600, Mary. Think of it. 600. That could buy a
lot of things. I'm not gonna put that back.
256
00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:56,562
Okay, don't put the money back. Just go out there
and make sure James does not come in here.
257
00:14:56,646 --> 00:14:59,064
What am I gonna say to James?
Give him a drink. Make small talk.
258
00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:02,317
I can't make small talk.
You can. Now get out there and be calm.
259
00:15:06,489 --> 00:15:09,324
Just talk to James
and don't let him come in.
260
00:15:15,665 --> 00:15:19,084
Oh. Paul, Hi. Door was open.
I just came right in.
261
00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,712
Are you and Mary having
a little argument?
262
00:15:21,796 --> 00:15:24,756
'Cause I heard some noise in the kitchen.
I thought perhaps you
263
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:27,759
No. She's just finishing dinner.
264
00:15:27,844 --> 00:15:29,595
It'll be ready in a minute.
265
00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:31,930
I was helping her pound the veal.
266
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:34,182
Veal? Veal's my favorite food.
267
00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:37,227
But it's so expensive.
You shouldn't have gone to the trouble.
268
00:15:37,312 --> 00:15:40,105
Oh, well, actually
the veal is for tomorrow night.
269
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:42,899
We're having chicken.
Oh.
270
00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:45,027
Okay.
271
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:47,863
Would you like a drink? I know I would.
Yeah.
272
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,616
What can I get you?
273
00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:52,159
Whiskey would be fine.
274
00:15:52,243 --> 00:15:54,161
Whiskey
275
00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:56,079
would be fine.
276
00:15:57,248 --> 00:15:59,458
Whiskey would be fine.
277
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,548
He wants some whiskey.
278
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:09,384
Mary, we're both
going to end up in prison.
279
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:11,053
No, we're not.
280
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:14,389
We are going to end up in the country
with our own nice little restaurant.
281
00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:16,975
None of this ever happened.
282
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:20,312
Now, you take this drink to James
283
00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:23,899
and dinner will be ready in five minutes.
284
00:16:25,401 --> 00:16:27,486
Mary, I just killed a man.
285
00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:29,613
He was a man, honey.
286
00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:32,240
Now he's just a bag of garbage.
287
00:16:33,409 --> 00:16:36,203
I can't imagine anything more perfect.
288
00:16:36,287 --> 00:16:38,580
What's the down payment?
20,000.
289
00:16:38,665 --> 00:16:40,832
In two weeks?
Well, it's a great place.
290
00:16:40,917 --> 00:16:42,668
It's gonna go pretty quick.
291
00:16:42,752 --> 00:16:45,379
It's gonna get a taker.
I just hope it's you.
292
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:50,092
Well, look, I hate to eat and run
293
00:16:50,176 --> 00:16:54,513
but got a little homework
to catch up on at home, so
294
00:16:54,597 --> 00:16:57,015
Let me know about the place as soon as you can.
We will.
295
00:16:57,100 --> 00:17:00,018
You'll be hearing from us in a couple of days.
Oh, good. Okay. Bye.
296
00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:01,645
Good night, James.
Thanks for dinner.
297
00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:03,897
You're welcome.
Good night. Bye.
298
00:17:04,774 --> 00:17:06,858
Where are we gonna get $20,000?
299
00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:09,277
Come on.
Help me take out the garbage.
300
00:17:30,174 --> 00:17:33,552
I was thinking about going to
the bank tomorrow for a loan.
301
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:39,725
What do you think?
I guess it took him.
302
00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:42,728
No, I mean about the bank and the loan.
What loan?
303
00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:46,398
I was thinking about going to
the bank and getting a loan.
304
00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:52,154
Here. No bank
is gonna loan us any $20,000.
305
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:54,531
No, I know that.
306
00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:57,534
But a bank might loan us 10,000.
307
00:17:57,618 --> 00:18:00,537
And then we could sell
some of your wine collection.
308
00:18:00,621 --> 00:18:03,123
Sell some of my wine collection?
Why not?
309
00:18:03,207 --> 00:18:06,918
Mary, you know I've been
saving that wine for our restaurant.
310
00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:10,255
But, honey, if we don't do something
there's not gonna be any restaurant.
311
00:18:10,339 --> 00:18:11,673
Yeah.
312
00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:15,260
What if you just sold a few
of the most expensive bottles?
313
00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:17,929
A few? Like four?
314
00:18:18,014 --> 00:18:20,849
How about eight?
Eight?
315
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:22,976
Well, okay. Six.
316
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:25,061
Six?
How much would that bring us?
317
00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:27,814
Oh.
318
00:18:27,899 --> 00:18:29,900
Six would bring us, oh, I don't know
319
00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:32,319
about 500 a bottle.
320
00:18:32,403 --> 00:18:34,988
Oh, that's $3,000.
321
00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:38,158
Paul, that would be such a help.
322
00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:40,619
Yeah. 3,000.
323
00:18:40,703 --> 00:18:42,537
Okay.
324
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,791
Paul and Mary Bland
325
00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:48,251
announce the opening
of their new restaurant.
326
00:18:50,046 --> 00:18:52,464
Mary, if we call it the Country Kitchen
327
00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:55,467
can the specialty still be
the Bland Enchilada?
328
00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:57,886
I hope so. It's the best thing I do.
329
00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:03,725
Have to find the money
for the restaurant first.
330
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:06,228
Isn't this man from New York rich?
331
00:19:06,312 --> 00:19:08,939
Well, he's staying at the Beverly Wilton.
He can't be broke.
332
00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:12,484
Well, if he buys the wine
333
00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:15,445
and I get the loan from the bank
334
00:19:15,530 --> 00:19:18,031
perhaps maybe we can swing this.
335
00:19:21,786 --> 00:19:24,120
Paul?
Yeah.
336
00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:25,997
Where's my brush?
337
00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:28,166
Oh, it's in the bureau, honey.
338
00:19:35,758 --> 00:19:38,009
Paul?
Yeah?
339
00:19:39,345 --> 00:19:41,596
What's this?
What's what?
340
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:44,516
This card. Doris the Dominatrix?
341
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:48,854
Discipline mild or severe,
as you require.
342
00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:51,690
Call for an appointment.
Oh, that.
343
00:19:51,774 --> 00:19:54,693
She's some madwoman
who attacks people with a whip.
344
00:19:54,777 --> 00:19:57,696
She was at that swingers party.
She gave you a card?
345
00:19:57,780 --> 00:19:59,698
She gave everybody her card.
346
00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:01,408
That's disgusting.
347
00:20:01,492 --> 00:20:04,870
Apparently a lot of swingers
enjoy that sort of thing.
348
00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:08,081
I don't mind a little hugging and kissing.
349
00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:10,625
But that
350
00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:23,179
Mary.
351
00:20:23,264 --> 00:20:26,391
What do you think makes them
go for that weird stuff?
352
00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:29,185
Are they crazy?
They're sick.
353
00:20:29,270 --> 00:20:30,896
This world is overflowing
354
00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:34,065
with millions of sexual freaks.
355
00:20:34,150 --> 00:20:36,568
We're so lucky to have found each other.
356
00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:40,071
I know. Good night, dear.
357
00:20:40,156 --> 00:20:42,532
Sweet dreams.
358
00:20:48,539 --> 00:20:51,458
So how long will you be gone?
359
00:20:51,542 --> 00:20:54,294
I don't know.
As long as it takes to apply for a loan.
360
00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:57,923
You'll probably get it.
That dress sure shows off your collateral.
361
00:20:58,007 --> 00:20:59,758
Think so?
362
00:20:59,842 --> 00:21:01,760
Thanks for covering for me, Sheila.
363
00:21:01,844 --> 00:21:04,596
Clean-up crew,
you are needed in Intensive Care.
364
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:07,599
That was pretty nasty,
what you let that creep do to me yesterday.
365
00:21:07,683 --> 00:21:09,601
Well, whatever it was,
it must have worked.
366
00:21:09,685 --> 00:21:11,436
Yeah. They're letting me out.
367
00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:13,355
Congratulations. Good-bye.
368
00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:15,774
Not so fast.
369
00:21:15,858 --> 00:21:18,109
Why don't you let me
buy you a drink or somethin'?
370
00:21:18,194 --> 00:21:20,528
Forget it. Oh!
371
00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:24,157
Oh. What are you doing? I have an
appointment. I'm gonna be late now.
372
00:21:24,241 --> 00:21:27,369
Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to
373
00:21:30,456 --> 00:21:32,540
Is this you?
374
00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:34,376
Doris the Dominatrix?
That's right, buster.
375
00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:38,004
I'm way out of your league, so stay away
from me or I'll hit you with my whip.
376
00:21:38,089 --> 00:21:41,132
I thought you were
a lot more hip than you let on.
377
00:21:43,594 --> 00:21:45,512
How 'bout telling me where she lives.
378
00:21:45,596 --> 00:21:49,933
Oh, Mr. Baker, that's against regulations.
379
00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:58,024
Un moment!
380
00:22:02,196 --> 00:22:04,489
Mr. Bland.
How are you? I'm John Peck.
381
00:22:04,573 --> 00:22:06,992
How do you do?
You brought them with. Good, good.
382
00:22:07,076 --> 00:22:09,995
Why don't we put the little beauties down
here on the coffee table.
383
00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:12,205
Yes, excellent.
384
00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:15,000
A lovely year. Lovely.
385
00:22:15,084 --> 00:22:17,585
Are you hungry?
I was about to go to the restaurant.
386
00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:20,505
We can leave these here.
No one will trouble them, I'm sure.
387
00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:24,384
I'll buy you a little déjeuner and we can
haggle about price over the steak tartare.
388
00:22:24,468 --> 00:22:27,846
It's not Jour Cinq, but I'm sure you'll
find the cuisine here quite palatable.
389
00:22:27,930 --> 00:22:29,848
I'm often amazed in my travels
390
00:22:29,932 --> 00:22:31,891
Oh, I only want to sell six.
391
00:22:31,976 --> 00:22:36,062
Six? Is that all?
Oh, well, that's too bad.
392
00:22:36,147 --> 00:22:39,357
Well, I suppose one takes
what one can get in this life, eh?
393
00:22:39,442 --> 00:22:41,276
Would you excuse me, please?
394
00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:43,111
I have to cash some traveler's checks.
395
00:22:56,584 --> 00:22:58,084
Oh.
396
00:23:07,470 --> 00:23:09,220
Thank you.
397
00:23:09,305 --> 00:23:12,932
Mrs. Bland.
Nice to see you. Please sit down.
398
00:23:14,894 --> 00:23:17,062
I have your loan application right here.
399
00:23:17,146 --> 00:23:21,775
Let's see. You and Mr. Bland wish to
purchase a restaurant out in Valencia.
400
00:23:21,859 --> 00:23:23,902
Yes, that's right.
401
00:23:23,986 --> 00:23:26,738
Have you or your husband
ever been in the rest
402
00:23:26,822 --> 00:23:30,658
No, but I've been
a nutritionist at General Parker
403
00:23:30,743 --> 00:23:33,787
and my husband's been a wine merchant
for several years now.
404
00:23:35,414 --> 00:23:38,041
Well, looking at you, Mrs. Bland
405
00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:42,962
I have no doubt in my mind that you would be
a success at anything you put your hand to.
406
00:23:43,047 --> 00:23:45,965
Well, thank you very much, Mr. Leech.
407
00:23:46,050 --> 00:23:50,386
I would relish the possibility of
becoming one of your clientele.
408
00:23:50,471 --> 00:23:53,890
Both my husband and I would really
like you to come to our restaurant
409
00:23:53,974 --> 00:23:55,642
if we get it.
410
00:23:55,726 --> 00:23:58,144
It was actually more your hospitality
411
00:23:58,229 --> 00:24:00,313
that I was thinking about, Mrs. Bland.
412
00:24:00,397 --> 00:24:04,109
Your enthusiasm is very encouraging,
Mr. Leech.
413
00:24:04,193 --> 00:24:05,819
Thank you, Mrs. Bland.
414
00:24:05,903 --> 00:24:09,072
I'm feeling quite encouraged myself.
415
00:24:17,206 --> 00:24:19,082
You through with this?
416
00:24:19,166 --> 00:24:21,709
Yes, I -
Good. I'll go bury it.
417
00:24:32,972 --> 00:24:35,348
Mr. Peck?
418
00:24:37,309 --> 00:24:41,938
Mrs. Bland, every weekend I give a party for
some of my more sexually liberated friends.
419
00:24:42,022 --> 00:24:45,233
Many of them are bank customers
like yourself.
420
00:24:45,317 --> 00:24:48,987
Could you come next weekend?
You can bring your husband, if you want to.
421
00:24:49,071 --> 00:24:51,739
Oh, that's nice, but it's getting late
422
00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:55,243
and I do have to get back to the hospital,
so if you would just
423
00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:57,745
I'd like to help you in every way I can,
Mrs. Bland
424
00:24:57,830 --> 00:25:00,915
but I have to be sure that you're going to
comply with all of the bank's wishes.
425
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,334
$10,000 is a great deal of money.
426
00:25:03,419 --> 00:25:05,587
Mr. Leech, I'm sure the bank
has nothing to worry about.
427
00:25:05,671 --> 00:25:07,380
It's gonna get everything
that's coming to it.
428
00:25:07,464 --> 00:25:10,758
It's just that the bank wants to see what it's getting into.
Oh, Mr. Leech! Please!
429
00:25:10,843 --> 00:25:14,262
If I could just sort of poke around
in your safety deposit box
430
00:25:14,346 --> 00:25:17,265
Stop it, you filthy pervert!
You're like everybody else!
431
00:25:17,349 --> 00:25:20,518
Mr. Leech!
Are you all right, Mr. Leech?
432
00:25:20,603 --> 00:25:23,730
I rejected this woman's loan application
on grounds of insufficient credit.
433
00:25:23,814 --> 00:25:27,192
In desperation she made certain advances
to me, which I of course repulsed.
434
00:25:27,276 --> 00:25:29,235
You liar!
Get her out of here, Thomas!
435
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:33,364
Never mind about the police. She's just upset.
Liar! Pervert! Hypocrite!
436
00:25:33,449 --> 00:25:36,201
Rapist! Psycho! You You swinger, you!
437
00:25:36,285 --> 00:25:38,870
You're letting that woman go?
438
00:25:40,956 --> 00:25:45,210
Gosh, Mr. Leech, you're such a good man.
439
00:25:45,294 --> 00:25:47,420
Thank you, Miss Adams.
440
00:25:47,504 --> 00:25:51,466
Have I told you about the party
I'm giving this weekend?
441
00:25:53,177 --> 00:25:55,303
Paul?
Yeah?
442
00:25:55,387 --> 00:25:57,388
He didn't buy -
Buy?
443
00:25:57,473 --> 00:25:59,557
He stole all six bottles.
444
00:25:59,642 --> 00:26:01,893
Did you get the loan?
No.
445
00:26:02,895 --> 00:26:04,812
The creep tried to put the make on me.
446
00:26:04,897 --> 00:26:07,482
People are pigs.
How do they get away with it?
447
00:26:07,566 --> 00:26:10,902
Why should they live so well when
good people like you and me get shafted?
448
00:26:10,986 --> 00:26:16,157
I don't know. The next person who puts his
hands on me is gonna get shafted right back.
449
00:26:17,576 --> 00:26:19,869
Mary, honey.
450
00:26:19,954 --> 00:26:22,080
What?
My back hurts.
451
00:26:22,164 --> 00:26:24,332
Would you walk on it for me?
452
00:26:24,416 --> 00:26:26,417
Sure.
453
00:26:32,508 --> 00:26:34,801
Hiya, Doris!
What are you doing here? Get out!
454
00:26:34,885 --> 00:26:37,262
Don't panic. I didn't blow your cover
back at the hospital.
455
00:26:37,346 --> 00:26:40,515
Mary, who is this guy?
Nobody. He's a patient from the hospital.
456
00:26:40,599 --> 00:26:43,726
Nobody? I got money.
You want big bucks? I got 'em.
457
00:26:43,811 --> 00:26:46,521
I don't mind paying cash for gash,
as long as it's class.
458
00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:49,565
What the hell do you think you're doing?
459
00:26:49,650 --> 00:26:52,568
I didn't know you knew I was into rape fantasies.
Get off her! Are you crazy?
460
00:26:52,653 --> 00:26:55,113
I told you, man, I can't wait.
Now listen, buddy.
461
00:26:55,197 --> 00:26:59,158
Don't worry about it. You can have her back
just as soon as I'm finished.
462
00:26:59,243 --> 00:27:01,786
Dynamite! Oh!
463
00:27:01,870 --> 00:27:04,289
No!
Yeah, yeah!
464
00:27:04,373 --> 00:27:07,166
Charge!
465
00:27:07,251 --> 00:27:09,252
Paul!
466
00:27:13,632 --> 00:27:16,384
Paul! Paul!
Now, there's a nasty bitch!
467
00:27:16,468 --> 00:27:20,513
You're gonna get so hot, you're gonna
burn a hole right through the couch.
468
00:27:20,597 --> 00:27:22,890
Get off me!
Jesus!
469
00:27:36,405 --> 00:27:37,989
Are you all right?
470
00:27:38,073 --> 00:27:40,158
Goddamn swinger.
471
00:27:42,202 --> 00:27:43,578
Dead.
472
00:27:43,662 --> 00:27:45,163
Good.
473
00:27:46,206 --> 00:27:49,625
Paul, there is nearly $500 here.
474
00:27:49,710 --> 00:27:52,628
These swinger types
always seem to have money.
475
00:27:52,713 --> 00:27:55,173
Well, now it's ours.
You want his watch?
476
00:27:55,257 --> 00:27:56,758
Thanks.
477
00:27:56,842 --> 00:28:00,887
Do you realize that we have made
almost $1,000 in two days, tax free?
478
00:28:00,971 --> 00:28:03,181
Just by killing people.
479
00:28:03,265 --> 00:28:07,310
Horrible, sex-crazed maniacs
that nobody in the world would miss.
480
00:28:07,394 --> 00:28:11,522
I wonder how much we could make
if we really put our minds to it.
481
00:28:11,607 --> 00:28:13,024
What do you mean?
482
00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:15,360
This city is full of rich perverts.
483
00:28:15,444 --> 00:28:17,820
If somehow we could get them
to come to the apartment
484
00:28:17,905 --> 00:28:21,366
But, Mary, why would they?
We'd have to lure them with
485
00:28:21,450 --> 00:28:22,867
Sex.
486
00:28:22,951 --> 00:28:25,828
But you wouldn't really have to
487
00:28:25,913 --> 00:28:29,499
I mean, you wouldn't actually do anything.
Of course not.
488
00:28:29,583 --> 00:28:32,377
The minute they try anything dirty,
you pop them in the head
489
00:28:32,461 --> 00:28:34,629
and get rid of them,
like you did with this guy.
490
00:28:34,713 --> 00:28:36,297
Mary, how would we contact them?
491
00:28:36,382 --> 00:28:38,883
We don't know anything
about this swinger business.
492
00:28:39,635 --> 00:28:42,053
Ask someone who does.
493
00:28:43,472 --> 00:28:45,390
All of them read this?
494
00:28:45,474 --> 00:28:48,476
Isn't there something a little more -
Classier?
495
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:51,854
Nope. This paper covers the field
from the richest to the poorest.
496
00:28:51,939 --> 00:28:54,357
If they're kinky,
they read the Hollywood Press.
497
00:28:54,441 --> 00:28:57,527
Come on, honey! You like this!
498
00:28:57,611 --> 00:28:59,779
You know, if you steam fresh vegetables
499
00:28:59,863 --> 00:29:01,781
and then puree them in a blender
500
00:29:01,865 --> 00:29:03,783
it would be better for your baby.
501
00:29:03,867 --> 00:29:07,203
Mary's a nutritionist.
No kidding. Does that pay well?
502
00:29:07,287 --> 00:29:09,622
About 450 after taxes.
503
00:29:09,706 --> 00:29:12,625
Oh, honey, you'll make
a hell of a lot more in my racket.
504
00:29:12,709 --> 00:29:15,253
Are you gonna work with her?
505
00:29:15,337 --> 00:29:18,256
Why not? You get the bi
and gay trade that way.
506
00:29:18,340 --> 00:29:21,175
And those people have
a lot of money, believe me.
507
00:29:22,928 --> 00:29:24,512
I don't think -
I understand.
508
00:29:24,596 --> 00:29:27,515
Everybody's gotta make up his own mind
about where to draw the line.
509
00:29:27,599 --> 00:29:30,143
I personally draw the line
at golden showers.
510
00:29:30,227 --> 00:29:32,645
Golden showers?
511
00:29:32,729 --> 00:29:36,607
Listen. Did you ever do any acting?
I did some in high school.
512
00:29:36,692 --> 00:29:38,734
Well, that's all it is, is acting.
513
00:29:38,819 --> 00:29:41,612
Lick my sneakers, you little worm!
514
00:29:41,697 --> 00:29:43,656
See what I mean? It's easy!
515
00:29:44,658 --> 00:29:46,993
Lick my sneaker, you little worm.
516
00:29:47,077 --> 00:29:49,120
See? You're a natural.
517
00:29:49,204 --> 00:29:53,332
That's my laundry. If I don't get it into
the dryer quickly, it'll wrinkle bad.
518
00:29:53,417 --> 00:29:56,085
Was there anything else
you wanted to ask about?
519
00:29:56,170 --> 00:29:59,088
No, I think we've just about covered it.
There's nothing to it.
520
00:29:59,173 --> 00:30:01,090
Just remember to get the money up front.
521
00:30:01,175 --> 00:30:04,135
And whatever they want to do,
stop if it draws blood.
522
00:30:06,054 --> 00:30:08,973
I'll bet we could
get started on this for about $400.
523
00:30:09,057 --> 00:30:10,975
We have to take out an ad first.
524
00:30:11,059 --> 00:30:14,520
Yeah. And I have to rent a post office box someplace.
Paul, we have a ticket!
525
00:30:16,356 --> 00:30:18,441
No, it's just a flyer.
526
00:30:18,525 --> 00:30:20,526
Wait, wait. What is it?
527
00:30:21,904 --> 00:30:24,822
Some lock service that
puts in new locks cheap.
528
00:30:24,907 --> 00:30:26,657
12.95.
529
00:30:26,742 --> 00:30:31,162
When Mrs. Berkowitz was robbed,
it cost her $35 to put new locks in.
530
00:30:31,246 --> 00:30:33,873
12.95 isn't a bad price.
531
00:30:33,957 --> 00:30:36,167
Raoul's Lock and Key Service.
532
00:30:36,251 --> 00:30:39,462
Raoul. Probably just got in
from Guadalajara.
533
00:30:39,546 --> 00:30:42,632
I think it's a good idea.
What's a good idea?
534
00:30:42,716 --> 00:30:44,342
Putting in new locks.
535
00:30:44,426 --> 00:30:48,429
We don't want people wandering in
when we're bopping perverts.
536
00:30:51,183 --> 00:30:53,351
Look, Mary. Our ad's out.
537
00:30:53,435 --> 00:30:55,353
We do anything.
538
00:30:55,437 --> 00:30:58,022
Well, that's certainly
laying it on the line.
539
00:30:58,106 --> 00:31:01,400
Whatever your sex fantasies,
from the ordinary to the most bizarre
540
00:31:01,485 --> 00:31:03,694
Carla and Nancy will accommodate you.
541
00:31:03,779 --> 00:31:06,197
Cute names.
Well, what do you think?
542
00:31:07,282 --> 00:31:09,200
Does that answer your question?
543
00:31:09,284 --> 00:31:11,202
All that in the box today?
544
00:31:11,286 --> 00:31:13,204
Our first clients.
545
00:31:13,288 --> 00:31:15,039
You go first.
546
00:31:17,834 --> 00:31:20,044
Dear Mommy
547
00:31:21,630 --> 00:31:24,590
Here is an indecent picture of me.
548
00:31:24,675 --> 00:31:28,177
As you can see,
I have been a very bad boy
549
00:31:28,262 --> 00:31:31,722
and I hope you will
discipline me very severely.
550
00:31:31,807 --> 00:31:33,516
Yours, Bobby R.
551
00:31:35,102 --> 00:31:37,562
Well, he left a phone number.
552
00:31:37,646 --> 00:31:39,313
Well, there's a phone.
553
00:31:45,404 --> 00:31:48,072
Hello. Is this Bobby R?
554
00:31:49,283 --> 00:31:52,743
Well, this is your mother calling.
Cruel Carla.
555
00:31:52,828 --> 00:31:54,745
Were you expecting my call?
556
00:31:54,830 --> 00:31:56,914
Insult him. Call him names.
557
00:31:56,999 --> 00:32:01,085
Yes, Bobby, you little worm.
I saw what you did
558
00:32:01,169 --> 00:32:04,922
and I'm going to teach you a lesson
that you're never gonna forget.
559
00:32:05,007 --> 00:32:07,466
But it's gonna cost you a lot.
How much?
560
00:32:07,551 --> 00:32:09,635
It's it's gonna cost
561
00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:11,137
$300.
562
00:32:11,221 --> 00:32:14,140
It's gonna cost you $300.
563
00:32:14,224 --> 00:32:15,808
Yes.
564
00:32:15,892 --> 00:32:17,852
He said yes!
565
00:32:17,936 --> 00:32:20,438
Address?
566
00:32:20,522 --> 00:32:25,776
All right, I want you to come
to 525 Oxford Lane at 7:00.
567
00:32:25,861 --> 00:32:28,112
And bring cash, you little jerk!
568
00:32:28,196 --> 00:32:30,364
No checks and no credit cards!
569
00:32:31,533 --> 00:32:33,534
Thank you.
570
00:32:33,619 --> 00:32:36,579
Well
571
00:32:36,663 --> 00:32:38,664
How'd I do?
He's coming, isn't he?
572
00:32:38,749 --> 00:32:40,124
Yeah.
Let's call another one.
573
00:32:40,208 --> 00:32:42,126
I think we can do two a night.
Don't you?
574
00:32:42,210 --> 00:32:44,295
How about this guy for 9:00?
Ecch!
575
00:32:44,379 --> 00:32:47,131
Yeah, but he's got
a Beverly Hills address.
576
00:32:47,215 --> 00:32:49,800
See if he'll go 350.
577
00:32:49,885 --> 00:32:51,802
Who could that be?
I don't know.
578
00:32:51,887 --> 00:32:53,804
Just a minute! Who is it?
579
00:32:53,889 --> 00:32:56,015
Lock service!
Lock service?
580
00:32:57,893 --> 00:33:00,811
Hello. Lock service.
You the lady of the house?
581
00:33:00,896 --> 00:33:02,813
Yes. This is my husband here.
582
00:33:02,898 --> 00:33:04,523
Hello.
Hello.
583
00:33:04,608 --> 00:33:07,526
Okay, okay, let's take a look around here.
584
00:33:07,611 --> 00:33:10,863
You ain't got no back door?
No. Why should that make a difference?
585
00:33:10,947 --> 00:33:13,866
This is the main point of entry.
What other point would there be?
586
00:33:13,950 --> 00:33:16,369
Someplace you would never think of,
like the windows.
587
00:33:16,453 --> 00:33:18,829
The windows?
Oh, yeah. These thieves are very slick.
588
00:33:18,914 --> 00:33:21,582
But we're on the 5th floor.
There's no fire escape.
589
00:33:21,667 --> 00:33:24,085
You think that'll stop them?
Well, I just don't see how anybody could
590
00:33:24,169 --> 00:33:26,087
Look, I don't want to argue with you.
591
00:33:26,171 --> 00:33:28,339
Oh, yeah, it's a good thing you called me.
Why?
592
00:33:28,423 --> 00:33:30,508
'Cause any thief with half a brain
could open this lock
593
00:33:30,592 --> 00:33:32,218
with a plastic card or a flexible ruler.
594
00:33:32,302 --> 00:33:33,803
How?
See?
595
00:33:33,887 --> 00:33:35,513
Oh, good heavens.
And look.
596
00:33:35,597 --> 00:33:38,516
There's only four screws holding it in place.
He's right.
597
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:40,518
One good kick and it would be gone.
598
00:33:40,602 --> 00:33:44,563
I could put in a new one like I advertised for $20.
It said 12.95 in your flyer.
599
00:33:44,648 --> 00:33:46,774
That was the old price.
The old price?
600
00:33:46,858 --> 00:33:48,651
Everything's going up.
Well, yeah, but
601
00:33:48,735 --> 00:33:51,153
Hey, it's a nice place you got here.
Well, thank you.
602
00:33:51,238 --> 00:33:54,156
It would be a crime to let some punk
burglar break in and take all of your
603
00:33:54,241 --> 00:33:56,784
You keep anything of value around here?
604
00:33:56,868 --> 00:33:58,786
No, nothing.
Well, Paul, that's not true.
605
00:33:58,870 --> 00:34:01,789
What about your wine collection?
My husband collects very good wine.
606
00:34:01,873 --> 00:34:03,791
Oh, yeah? Is that worth much?
607
00:34:03,875 --> 00:34:06,210
Some of the bottles are worth $500.
Mary!
608
00:34:06,294 --> 00:34:08,045
Oh, yeah?
609
00:34:08,130 --> 00:34:10,381
Well, hey, you don't wanna take a chance with that.
No.
610
00:34:10,465 --> 00:34:13,384
Besides, if anybody breaks through
one of my special locks
611
00:34:13,468 --> 00:34:17,638
I guarantee not only to replace the lock but
also the value of anything that is stolen.
612
00:34:17,723 --> 00:34:19,974
How often does that happen?
Never.
613
00:34:20,058 --> 00:34:23,185
Listen, what about these windows?
Are these really a problem?
614
00:34:23,270 --> 00:34:26,731
In most cases no.
Of course, there's always a chance.
615
00:34:26,815 --> 00:34:29,233
How much would it cost
to have the windows fixed too?
616
00:34:29,317 --> 00:34:31,235
$800.
Eight hun What?
617
00:34:31,319 --> 00:34:33,237
Well, you just can't put on locks.
618
00:34:33,321 --> 00:34:37,241
You gotta put up bars, and you gotta wire
the windows to the central alarm system
619
00:34:37,325 --> 00:34:39,577
that activates the telephone signal
to the police.
620
00:34:39,661 --> 00:34:41,162
Forget it.
621
00:34:41,246 --> 00:34:42,997
Mr
622
00:34:43,081 --> 00:34:45,791
Call me Raoul.
M-Mr. Raoul.
623
00:34:45,876 --> 00:34:49,336
Are you at all familiar with handcuffs?
624
00:34:49,421 --> 00:34:51,714
Once or twice. Why?
625
00:34:51,798 --> 00:34:55,843
Well, how much would it cost
to put sets of handcuffs in the walls?
626
00:34:55,927 --> 00:34:57,845
You wanna put handcuffs in your wall?
627
00:34:57,929 --> 00:34:59,680
Yeah. Just as a decorative motif.
628
00:34:59,765 --> 00:35:03,434
Well, never mind. When can you do the locks?
Hey, right now.
629
00:35:03,518 --> 00:35:08,147
Trust me. You and your husband ain't gonna
spend another insecure night in this place.
630
00:35:13,987 --> 00:35:17,448
Mr. Rabbit said,
Do you promise not to eat me?
631
00:35:17,532 --> 00:35:20,493
And Mrs. Fox said, Give me $500.
632
00:35:22,370 --> 00:35:25,122
I've been very bad, haven't I, Mommy?
633
00:35:25,207 --> 00:35:28,375
Are you gonna teach me a good lesson?
Are you gonna spank me?
634
00:35:28,460 --> 00:35:31,754
Yes, you have been bad, Bobby,
and I am gonna spank you.
635
00:35:31,838 --> 00:35:33,297
No, hard.
636
00:35:33,381 --> 00:35:36,050
So hard you won't be able
to sit down! Ever!
637
00:35:36,134 --> 00:35:40,221
Like hell you will.
Screw you, Mommy, you hostile bitch.
638
00:35:43,099 --> 00:35:46,018
Just a minute. I'll be back.
639
00:35:48,438 --> 00:35:50,356
What is taking you so long?
640
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:53,484
Can't you get him to do something to you?
Hit you? Anything!
641
00:35:53,568 --> 00:35:56,821
I can't hit him if he doesn't make me angry.
Honestly, Paul.
642
00:35:58,740 --> 00:36:00,950
I made a mess!
643
00:36:01,034 --> 00:36:04,078
Look, Bobby, if you want Mommy
to discipline you
644
00:36:04,162 --> 00:36:06,413
you're going to have to do
what Mommy likes.
645
00:36:06,498 --> 00:36:08,999
Oh, yes, Bobby. Mommy likes that.
646
00:36:09,084 --> 00:36:13,462
Oh! Don't bite me there, Bobby!
Oh, Bobby, please, no!
647
00:36:13,547 --> 00:36:17,842
Bobby! Stop, stop! I can't stand it!
Please! You're hurting me!
648
00:36:17,926 --> 00:36:19,677
Bobby, don't bite me there!
649
00:36:19,761 --> 00:36:22,179
No! Please!
650
00:36:24,432 --> 00:36:26,725
Where'd he get you?
651
00:36:26,810 --> 00:36:31,021
He didn't get me.
I was pretending to get you out here.
652
00:36:33,108 --> 00:36:35,568
This may turn out to be
harder than we thought.
653
00:36:35,652 --> 00:36:38,571
Very well, Fräulein! I ask you again!
654
00:36:38,655 --> 00:36:42,116
And if I do not get an answer,
you will force me to give you pain.
655
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:44,827
Where are they hiding?
656
00:36:44,911 --> 00:36:48,330
What? You still have no memory?
657
00:36:48,415 --> 00:36:51,834
Oh, I don't know why it is
658
00:36:51,918 --> 00:36:55,129
that I feel so merciful today.
659
00:36:55,213 --> 00:36:58,465
Fräulein, perhaps
660
00:36:59,718 --> 00:37:01,635
it is because you look
661
00:37:01,720 --> 00:37:06,682
so innocent, so respectful of me.
662
00:37:06,766 --> 00:37:09,894
Or perhaps it is because
663
00:37:09,978 --> 00:37:13,230
I know that the more
you wait for the pain
664
00:37:13,315 --> 00:37:16,400
the more you will enjoy the pain.
665
00:37:17,569 --> 00:37:19,778
Even now
666
00:37:19,863 --> 00:37:22,781
these creamy white shoulders
667
00:37:22,866 --> 00:37:25,200
are aching for the lash.
668
00:37:25,285 --> 00:37:28,370
I will never tell you where they are,
you filthy Nazi pig.
669
00:37:35,295 --> 00:37:37,338
So
670
00:37:37,422 --> 00:37:40,341
you want to play rough, do you?
671
00:37:40,425 --> 00:37:43,344
I will show you rough.
672
00:37:47,098 --> 00:37:49,016
Oh, what an ordeal.
673
00:37:49,100 --> 00:37:51,393
I thought he would never stop talking.
674
00:37:52,437 --> 00:37:54,855
Nobody can say we don't earn this money.
675
00:37:54,940 --> 00:37:58,943
A check!
I told him not to bring a check!
676
00:37:59,027 --> 00:38:01,528
After this no more actors. Okay?
677
00:38:01,613 --> 00:38:03,530
Why don't you go to bed, honey?
678
00:38:03,615 --> 00:38:06,700
I'll bag the Nazi and straighten up around here.
Okay.
679
00:38:06,785 --> 00:38:09,787
I'll see you in a little while.
Good night.
680
00:40:17,457 --> 00:40:20,167
Paul, where's the money?
I don't know. Isn't it here?
681
00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:22,169
Did you take it into the bedroom?
Of course I
682
00:40:22,253 --> 00:40:24,088
Somebody's in here.
683
00:40:24,172 --> 00:40:27,174
They're in the kitchen. Come on.
684
00:40:29,427 --> 00:40:30,886
The lock man.
685
00:40:30,970 --> 00:40:33,347
I should have known
it was too cheap to be true. Okay, Raoul
686
00:40:33,431 --> 00:40:35,432
If that's your name.
Give us the money back.
687
00:40:35,517 --> 00:40:38,185
What money?
The money you took from the other room. Give it back.
688
00:40:38,269 --> 00:40:40,062
Why? Is it yours?
689
00:40:40,146 --> 00:40:42,272
Of course it's ours.
Maybe it belongs to that vato in the bag.
690
00:40:42,357 --> 00:40:44,274
We didn't kill him.
That was an accident.
691
00:40:44,359 --> 00:40:45,734
And the other one?
692
00:40:45,819 --> 00:40:47,277
That was another accident -
That was the strangest thing
693
00:40:47,362 --> 00:40:49,279
What happened?
The gas from the kitchen
694
00:40:49,364 --> 00:40:50,614
He was hit by lightning
Paul!
695
00:40:50,698 --> 00:40:53,617
You know what I think?
I think you killed these people.
696
00:40:53,701 --> 00:40:56,328
And I don't think you want
the police to know about it.
697
00:40:56,412 --> 00:40:58,539
What if we did kill 'em?
What makes you think we won't kill you?
698
00:40:58,623 --> 00:41:01,458
Yeah.
You can try.
699
00:41:01,543 --> 00:41:04,795
But I'm willing to make a deal -
We're not giving up any of that money.
700
00:41:04,879 --> 00:41:08,382
Why should we give up any of it?
We had to kill two people to get it.
701
00:41:08,466 --> 00:41:11,593
You killed two people for less than a thousand dollars?
One of them shortchanged us.
702
00:41:11,678 --> 00:41:13,971
That seems like a lot of work
for not so much money.
703
00:41:14,055 --> 00:41:15,973
As a matter of fact, it was easy.
704
00:41:16,057 --> 00:41:17,975
We lured those people here
with an ad in the Hollywood Press
705
00:41:18,059 --> 00:41:19,810
and then I hit them
over the head with this.
706
00:41:19,894 --> 00:41:22,646
The Hollywood Press?
That's right. This is Naughty Nancy.
707
00:41:22,730 --> 00:41:25,566
No!
And Cruel Carla.
708
00:41:25,650 --> 00:41:27,234
No! I don't believe it.
709
00:41:27,318 --> 00:41:29,319
You don't believe it?
Show him the ad.
710
00:41:29,404 --> 00:41:30,988
Come here.
711
00:41:34,367 --> 00:41:36,368
There, on the table.
712
00:41:40,540 --> 00:41:43,458
Oh, man, that's fantastic.
713
00:41:43,543 --> 00:41:44,960
You know
714
00:41:45,044 --> 00:41:47,754
I was gonna answer that ad myself.
715
00:41:47,839 --> 00:41:51,758
I gotta hand it to you. You guys got
a very original scam going here.
716
00:41:51,843 --> 00:41:53,760
Well, it was mostly Mary's idea.
717
00:41:53,845 --> 00:41:56,013
Paul's just being modest.
718
00:41:56,097 --> 00:41:58,891
It is so sweet to see such
a loving couple as yourselves.
719
00:41:58,975 --> 00:42:01,185
Now about this proposition -
We're not interested.
720
00:42:01,269 --> 00:42:02,519
Cálmate, cabrón.
721
00:42:02,604 --> 00:42:04,897
You want the money?
I'll give you back the money.
722
00:42:04,981 --> 00:42:06,690
All I want is the cadavers.
723
00:42:06,774 --> 00:42:08,275
The what?
The bodies.
724
00:42:08,359 --> 00:42:10,027
What do you want them for?
725
00:42:10,111 --> 00:42:13,155
That's my business.
But I'm gonna split it with you 50-50.
726
00:42:13,239 --> 00:42:15,699
You take the cash,
you give me everything else.
727
00:42:15,783 --> 00:42:18,368
We're gonna make a nice profit.
$200, $300 for each of us.
728
00:42:18,453 --> 00:42:20,412
That's ridiculous. Those -
It's a deal.
729
00:42:20,496 --> 00:42:22,331
Just think. No more trash compactor.
730
00:42:22,415 --> 00:42:24,875
Mary, how do we know
he won't just go to the police?
731
00:42:24,959 --> 00:42:28,879
Yeah, right, pendejo.
I'm a fuckin' professional thief, man.
732
00:42:28,963 --> 00:42:31,256
Well, all right.
733
00:42:31,341 --> 00:42:33,884
We'll give you the two bodies
we have on hand at the moment.
734
00:42:33,968 --> 00:42:37,512
You see what you can do with them. Then, in
a few days, if you bring back the money
735
00:42:37,597 --> 00:42:39,306
we'll have some more for you.
736
00:42:39,390 --> 00:42:41,767
Now, do we get the cash back?
But of course.
737
00:42:58,243 --> 00:43:00,244
Well, that was easy.
738
00:43:00,328 --> 00:43:02,913
Maybe for you.
739
00:43:02,997 --> 00:43:05,040
Watch out for his sword.
740
00:43:07,627 --> 00:43:10,045
This costume is so hot.
741
00:43:10,129 --> 00:43:12,839
Yeah? Well, for $400
you could be Humpty-Dumpty.
742
00:43:12,924 --> 00:43:14,591
Believe me, I'm not complaining.
743
00:43:14,676 --> 00:43:16,885
Who is it?
744
00:43:16,970 --> 00:43:18,720
It's me, Raoul.
745
00:43:18,805 --> 00:43:21,431
Did you bring the money?
Come on. Let me in.
746
00:43:27,522 --> 00:43:30,565
What is she supposed to be?
A cartoon mouse.
747
00:43:30,650 --> 00:43:33,277
Man, I hate to see a beautiful woman
degraded like that.
748
00:43:33,361 --> 00:43:36,697
Yeah, well, we don't
choose these fantasies. They do.
749
00:43:37,949 --> 00:43:40,117
Come on.
Help me get this guy in the bag.
750
00:43:42,662 --> 00:43:44,162
Excuse me.
751
00:43:46,082 --> 00:43:49,960
Well, let's have it, Raoul. How much cash did
you get for those two stiffs we advanced?
752
00:43:50,044 --> 00:43:51,545
$1,400.
753
00:43:51,629 --> 00:43:53,630
That makes your share $700.
754
00:43:53,715 --> 00:43:55,340
Raoul, that's wonderful.
755
00:43:55,425 --> 00:43:58,802
That ring that one guy had -
That must have been worth quite a lot?
756
00:43:58,886 --> 00:44:02,139
Gold-plate and cut glass?
Worth maybe $20, $30.
757
00:44:02,223 --> 00:44:04,808
I could have told you
that ring wasn't worth anything.
758
00:44:10,064 --> 00:44:12,274
How much does the King
pay for, like, raw material?
759
00:44:12,358 --> 00:44:15,360
Fifty cents a pound.
Fifty cents a pound?
760
00:44:15,445 --> 00:44:16,987
All right, man.
761
00:44:17,071 --> 00:44:19,990
Tomorrow night, I'm gonna bring you,
like, 400 or 500 pounds.
762
00:44:20,074 --> 00:44:24,494
Hey, I don't know, man. I don't like to fuck
around with the King. It's my job, you know.
763
00:44:24,579 --> 00:44:27,331
Hey, I don't shit where I eat.
764
00:44:27,415 --> 00:44:30,167
Yeah. I know what you mean.
765
00:44:30,251 --> 00:44:32,544
Okay, listen, man.
I'm gonna take care of you.
766
00:44:32,628 --> 00:44:34,671
You want a 30-inch color TV?
You got it.
767
00:44:34,756 --> 00:44:37,591
But you gotta take this stuff from me.
It's perfect for the King, man.
768
00:44:37,675 --> 00:44:41,887
It's fresh.
No, man. Forget the TV. I need wheels.
769
00:44:41,971 --> 00:44:44,348
Is that all you need is wheels, ese?
Yeah.
770
00:44:44,432 --> 00:44:46,183
IPues órale!
771
00:44:46,267 --> 00:44:48,352
I'm gonna get you
some fine-looking wheels. All right?
772
00:44:48,436 --> 00:44:50,187
All right!
773
00:44:52,940 --> 00:44:54,649
That hippie guy's not gonna show up.
774
00:44:54,734 --> 00:44:56,735
We've thrown away $70 on this light show.
775
00:44:56,819 --> 00:44:59,529
Who's the 9:00?
Some sickie with a Great Dane.
776
00:44:59,614 --> 00:45:01,698
A Great Dane?
$500.
777
00:45:01,783 --> 00:45:03,909
Oh. Do we have to kill the dog too?
778
00:45:03,993 --> 00:45:06,870
Probably. It might lead somebody
back here otherwise.
779
00:45:06,954 --> 00:45:09,414
Why don't we give the dog
to Raoul as a present?
780
00:45:11,334 --> 00:45:13,418
Sorry. It was just a thought.
781
00:45:13,503 --> 00:45:15,253
Are you hungry?
I'm starving.
782
00:45:15,338 --> 00:45:17,798
Me too. I'm gonna go to the store
and get something.
783
00:45:17,882 --> 00:45:21,343
Chicken all right?
Yes, but go to Ralph's. I just like their produce better.
784
00:45:21,427 --> 00:45:22,886
Okay.
785
00:45:22,970 --> 00:45:25,305
Oh, and, Paul -
Yeah?
786
00:45:25,390 --> 00:45:27,391
Do you think you could buy
another frying pan?
787
00:45:27,475 --> 00:45:30,727
I'm just a little squeamish about cooking
in the one we're using to kill people.
788
00:45:30,812 --> 00:45:32,646
Yeah, sure.
789
00:45:41,614 --> 00:45:44,741
What'd you do, forget your keys?
790
00:45:47,078 --> 00:45:48,995
Hey, baby. Groovy outfit.
Oh.
791
00:45:49,080 --> 00:45:52,416
You're late, so -
Oh, I can't be late. Time is all relative.
792
00:45:52,500 --> 00:45:55,168
Wait a minute. I'm peaking. I'm peaking.
The music is The Dead.
793
00:45:55,253 --> 00:45:57,546
The incense, coconut.
I'm afraid that there's been
794
00:45:57,630 --> 00:46:01,425
Oh, don't be afraid. Don't be afraid.
Fear is a mind trap, baby.
795
00:46:01,509 --> 00:46:05,303
What we fear is the past becoming
the future. What we really have is now.
796
00:46:05,388 --> 00:46:07,305
There's been some mistake,
and so if you
797
00:46:07,390 --> 00:46:09,975
Oh, I know the mistake.
I see. You want me to cool you out
798
00:46:10,059 --> 00:46:11,726
No.
And make you less uptight.
799
00:46:11,811 --> 00:46:14,938
Okay. I know how to do that. Little Thai stick.
You guys like Thai sticks?
800
00:46:15,022 --> 00:46:18,358
No. I don't want any Thai stick, and I don't
want to get cooled out, whatever that means.
801
00:46:18,443 --> 00:46:20,318
I would just like you to leave now and
802
00:46:20,403 --> 00:46:22,654
Okay. You're bumming me out.
I'm trying to play ball with you here.
803
00:46:22,738 --> 00:46:25,407
I'm trying to play the game. I'm trying your lingo.
I'm trying your jargon.
804
00:46:25,491 --> 00:46:27,576
But you're making me upti You think I'm an uncool dude?
No.
805
00:46:27,660 --> 00:46:28,660
An unhip daddy?
No.
806
00:46:28,744 --> 00:46:30,245
Think just 'cause I got
a Ronson lighter
807
00:46:30,329 --> 00:46:31,872
maybe a couple credit cards,
I'm an uncool dude?
808
00:46:31,956 --> 00:46:33,832
No.
Tell you something. I've been to hell and back, bitch.
809
00:46:33,958 --> 00:46:37,127
Yeah. While you were sitting at home watching
Captain Kangaroo and munching on Cocoa Puffs
810
00:46:37,211 --> 00:46:40,130
I don't have a TV.
I was in 'Nam defending your ass?
811
00:46:40,214 --> 00:46:42,507
Oh, but I'm not hip enough for you. No.
812
00:46:42,592 --> 00:46:46,178
I didn't know that you hippie broads wore underwear?
It's a costume!
813
00:46:46,262 --> 00:46:47,971
Oh, sure it's a costume.
Get off me!
814
00:46:48,055 --> 00:46:50,682
Oh, look out.
Here comes the duke now!
815
00:46:50,766 --> 00:46:52,726
Get off me!
816
00:47:23,716 --> 00:47:25,884
Hijo.
817
00:47:25,968 --> 00:47:28,178
Look at this.
818
00:47:28,262 --> 00:47:30,222
How much?
819
00:47:30,306 --> 00:47:32,265
A lot, chiquita.
820
00:47:32,975 --> 00:47:34,726
Mucho dinero.
821
00:47:41,442 --> 00:47:43,443
Does that make you feel better?
822
00:47:46,322 --> 00:47:48,323
You feel comfortable now?
823
00:47:51,577 --> 00:47:53,078
Hey, look.
824
00:48:00,294 --> 00:48:03,380
It's Thai stick.
What is that stuff?
825
00:48:03,464 --> 00:48:05,215
You never had Thai?
826
00:48:05,299 --> 00:48:07,259
No. Is it good?
827
00:48:07,343 --> 00:48:09,261
Oh, it's the best.
828
00:48:09,345 --> 00:48:11,721
Try some. It'll make you feel real good.
No.
829
00:48:11,806 --> 00:48:14,474
Just inhale it real deep and hold it.
830
00:48:19,188 --> 00:48:21,439
I can't.
That's okay. Try it again.
831
00:48:27,989 --> 00:48:29,447
Is it good?
832
00:48:29,532 --> 00:48:32,117
It makes me feel funny.
833
00:48:33,202 --> 00:48:36,413
I feel warm.
Yeah.
834
00:48:36,497 --> 00:48:38,498
Like your blood has fire in it.
835
00:48:39,834 --> 00:48:41,751
I think I should get dressed now.
836
00:48:41,836 --> 00:48:43,962
You should be dressed.
837
00:48:44,046 --> 00:48:46,673
Only in the most beautiful furs.
838
00:48:46,757 --> 00:48:50,510
The finest silk next to your fine body.
839
00:48:50,595 --> 00:48:52,512
I have to get up.
840
00:48:52,597 --> 00:48:56,266
You should have servants
to massage you, pamper you.
841
00:48:57,476 --> 00:49:01,521
A sexy woman like you
should always be relaxed.
842
00:49:02,565 --> 00:49:04,691
Like a beautiful
843
00:49:04,775 --> 00:49:06,776
Rich
844
00:49:06,861 --> 00:49:09,404
purring cat.
845
00:49:10,364 --> 00:49:13,325
The lights. Turn out the lights.
846
00:49:19,874 --> 00:49:22,375
I got kind of carried away, honey. I
847
00:49:22,460 --> 00:49:25,503
What are you doing here?
Oh, it's a good thing he came when he did.
848
00:49:25,588 --> 00:49:28,089
If it wasn't for Raoul,
this creep would have raped me.
849
00:49:28,174 --> 00:49:29,924
This the guy we thought wouldn't show up?
850
00:49:30,009 --> 00:49:32,802
I had to strangle him with his own beads.
You did?
851
00:49:32,887 --> 00:49:35,347
Well, thanks.
How much money did he have on him?
852
00:49:35,431 --> 00:49:38,350
$700.
And here's 300 from the last one.
853
00:49:40,478 --> 00:49:42,979
That's friction from the rug.
854
00:49:43,064 --> 00:49:45,231
It makes an electrical charge.
855
00:49:49,070 --> 00:49:52,822
Well, Paul, I'd say this has been
a pretty profitable evening for you?
856
00:49:52,907 --> 00:49:55,158
Yeah. Not bad.
I better be going.
857
00:49:55,242 --> 00:49:57,160
Yeah.
I'll see you guys tomorrow night.
858
00:49:57,244 --> 00:49:59,913
Can you manage him?
Vayos con Dios.
859
00:50:03,250 --> 00:50:05,960
Vayos con Dios?
860
00:50:06,045 --> 00:50:07,962
He's teaching you Spanish now?
861
00:50:08,047 --> 00:50:10,006
That way he can talk to you
behind my back?
862
00:50:10,091 --> 00:50:13,301
Don't be silly, Paul. Everybody knows
what vayos con Dios means.
863
00:50:13,386 --> 00:50:16,596
Yeah. How come there's only $900 here?
864
00:50:16,681 --> 00:50:19,849
I gave 100 to Raoul.
After all, he did kill him.
865
00:50:19,934 --> 00:50:24,646
I suppose he earned it. I don't know, Mary.
I just don't trust that guy.
866
00:50:24,730 --> 00:50:27,440
Paul, you act as if we're lovers
or something.
867
00:50:29,110 --> 00:50:32,028
What time's the next one due?
9:00.
868
00:50:32,113 --> 00:50:34,864
Would you knock him off really quickly?
I'm kind of tired.
869
00:50:34,949 --> 00:50:37,534
You're sure you wouldn't rather
have Raoul come back and do it?
870
00:50:37,618 --> 00:50:40,078
There he is. What do I look like?
871
00:50:40,162 --> 00:50:41,788
Great.
872
00:50:43,165 --> 00:50:44,708
Bow, wow, wow.
873
00:50:47,420 --> 00:50:50,964
Oh, great. Trigger likes you already.
874
00:50:52,967 --> 00:50:55,593
Attention all male nurses.
875
00:50:55,678 --> 00:50:58,221
Excuse me.
Your dance is canceled for this evening.
876
00:50:58,305 --> 00:51:01,725
I got an appointment
to see Mrs. Bland, the nurse.
877
00:51:01,809 --> 00:51:04,227
It's for an examination.
A physical examination?
878
00:51:04,311 --> 00:51:07,230
Yeah. I think I got T.B. Or somethin'.
879
00:51:07,314 --> 00:51:12,068
You'll find Mrs. Bland down the hall
and to your left, room 145.
880
00:51:12,153 --> 00:51:14,070
Attention all male nurses.
881
00:51:14,155 --> 00:51:16,990
Your dance is canceled for this evening.
882
00:51:21,036 --> 00:51:22,662
Come in.
883
00:51:24,915 --> 00:51:27,917
The nurse at the desk
gave me a funny look when I asked for you.
884
00:51:28,002 --> 00:51:30,086
Never mind her.
Take off your shirt.
885
00:51:30,171 --> 00:51:31,880
What for?
886
00:51:31,964 --> 00:51:35,175
Because I want it to look as though
I'm examining you if anybody comes in.
887
00:51:35,259 --> 00:51:37,218
You want me to take off my pants too?
888
00:51:37,303 --> 00:51:40,722
Raoul.
And then maybe you'd like me to take off your pants.
889
00:51:40,806 --> 00:51:43,767
Raoul, I agreed to see you because
890
00:51:43,851 --> 00:51:46,770
I think that we should discuss
what happened the other night.
891
00:51:46,854 --> 00:51:48,313
Yeah.
892
00:51:48,397 --> 00:51:50,356
That's all I've been thinkin' about
for three days.
893
00:51:50,441 --> 00:51:53,818
It was a mistake. That's all.
894
00:51:53,903 --> 00:51:56,863
I don't want you to think
that it could ever happen again.
895
00:51:56,947 --> 00:52:01,117
I'm not about to risk my marriage
for the sake of some low animal attraction.
896
00:52:01,202 --> 00:52:04,454
What risk?
Your husband's never gonna know.
897
00:52:04,538 --> 00:52:06,206
Yes, he will.
898
00:52:06,290 --> 00:52:08,082
We know each other too well.
899
00:52:08,167 --> 00:52:11,836
He can sense when something's different.
Maybe you're right.
900
00:52:11,921 --> 00:52:14,506
Maybe we should go to your husband
and tell him everything.
901
00:52:14,590 --> 00:52:16,633
Are you crazy?
Yeah, I'm crazy!
902
00:52:16,717 --> 00:52:18,635
About you, chiquita.
903
00:52:18,719 --> 00:52:21,054
I don't care about your husband.
I don't care about the money.
904
00:52:21,138 --> 00:52:24,098
I don't care about nothin' but you.
That's ridiculous.
905
00:52:24,183 --> 00:52:26,643
You don't understand
who you're dealing with.
906
00:52:26,727 --> 00:52:30,480
I'm a hot-blooded,
emotional, crazy Chicano!
907
00:52:30,564 --> 00:52:33,483
I think you're
a calculating little bastard.
908
00:52:33,567 --> 00:52:35,068
Bastard?
909
00:52:41,075 --> 00:52:44,494
All right then. I'm gonna go to your
husband, and I'm gonna tell him everything.
910
00:52:44,578 --> 00:52:47,080
And then we'll have to
fight for you man-to-man.
911
00:52:47,164 --> 00:52:50,416
A man in love will do anything,
and I am a man in love.
912
00:52:50,501 --> 00:52:52,961
And I think you're a little bit
in love with me too?
913
00:52:53,045 --> 00:52:55,255
Don't be silly.
914
00:52:55,339 --> 00:52:58,174
That's nonsense.
I'm not in love with you.
915
00:52:58,259 --> 00:53:02,178
I was confused that night
because of that cigarette that you gave me.
916
00:53:02,263 --> 00:53:04,639
You'll like it even better
the second time.
917
00:53:05,641 --> 00:53:07,976
If I'm wrong
918
00:53:08,060 --> 00:53:10,061
I'll never bother you again.
919
00:53:18,195 --> 00:53:20,113
Is it a deal?
920
00:53:21,448 --> 00:53:23,324
You'll say nothing to Paul?
921
00:53:23,409 --> 00:53:27,036
I promise. Come on, chiquita.
922
00:53:27,121 --> 00:53:29,080
I want to make love to you.
923
00:53:29,164 --> 00:53:32,542
Well, just this once, but
924
00:53:32,626 --> 00:53:34,544
as long as you turn out the lights.
925
00:53:34,628 --> 00:53:37,630
Any way you like it.
And I know you're gonna like it.
926
00:53:39,341 --> 00:53:41,050
Here.
927
00:53:41,135 --> 00:53:43,469
You remember the way
I taught you to smoke this?
928
00:53:43,554 --> 00:53:45,138
I think so.
929
00:53:49,184 --> 00:53:51,978
Oh, baby, I'm gonna drive you crazy.
930
00:53:55,774 --> 00:53:58,818
Have you seen Mary?
Not for a half hour or so. Why?
931
00:53:58,903 --> 00:54:02,196
It's past 1:00, and there's a whole ward
that hasn't had its lunch yet.
932
00:54:02,281 --> 00:54:05,241
Hold down the desk for a while.
I'll see if I can scare her up.
933
00:54:05,326 --> 00:54:08,912
Well, make it snappy, 'cause those amputees get
awfully mean if they don't get their grub.
934
00:54:12,416 --> 00:54:14,334
This was very wrong.
935
00:54:15,419 --> 00:54:17,587
You didn't think that a little while ago.
936
00:54:17,671 --> 00:54:19,964
Then you didn't want to stop.
937
00:54:20,049 --> 00:54:24,594
Mary, if you've finished your examination,
you're wanted in B Ward.
938
00:54:24,678 --> 00:54:28,806
Oh, my God. It's after 1:00.
939
00:54:31,685 --> 00:54:33,603
Shush! Someone's gonna hear you.
940
00:54:33,687 --> 00:54:35,188
You know, chiquita?
941
00:54:35,272 --> 00:54:37,565
You and me could
make each other very happy
942
00:54:37,650 --> 00:54:40,944
and very rich
if it wasn't for your husband.
943
00:54:41,028 --> 00:54:44,739
It is only because of my husband
that I'm here in the first place.
944
00:54:44,823 --> 00:54:48,201
If he excited you the way I do,
you wouldn't even be with me.
945
00:54:48,285 --> 00:54:52,080
Paul and I have been together for 10 years.
Our marriage is based on something
946
00:54:52,164 --> 00:54:54,123
much more important than sex.
947
00:54:54,208 --> 00:54:58,628
Like what?
Like friendship and security.
948
00:54:58,712 --> 00:55:04,676
There would be more security for both of us if
we split the money two ways instead of three.
949
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:08,096
You are crazy.
What would you do if
950
00:55:08,180 --> 00:55:13,977
just supposing now -
if something were to happen to Paul?
951
00:55:14,061 --> 00:55:16,688
Would you continue
to do business with me?
952
00:55:16,772 --> 00:55:19,565
Nothing is going to happen to Paul.
953
00:55:19,650 --> 00:55:22,485
No. No, nothing's gonna happen to Paul.
954
00:55:23,320 --> 00:55:25,154
But you never know.
955
00:55:25,239 --> 00:55:27,448
Yeah, baby.
956
00:55:30,494 --> 00:55:31,995
What do you want?
957
00:55:32,079 --> 00:55:36,040
I'd like a vibrator,
please, and a pair of handcuffs.
958
00:55:36,125 --> 00:55:38,710
Get him out of here. He's not 18.
Hey, man. Come on. I'm 18.
959
00:55:38,794 --> 00:55:40,920
Get him out of here!
Aw, come on. Give me the magazine back.
960
00:55:41,005 --> 00:55:42,672
Let's go. Out of the store, kid.
Shit.
961
00:55:42,756 --> 00:55:44,465
And a ring.
962
00:55:44,550 --> 00:55:46,175
And a what?
963
00:55:46,260 --> 00:55:49,512
A cock ring.
Oh, a cock ring. What size?
964
00:55:49,596 --> 00:55:52,223
Hey. Did you get the latest
issue of Nuns and Nazis?
965
00:55:52,307 --> 00:55:53,808
Tuesday.
966
00:55:53,892 --> 00:55:56,894
What size?
Medium, I suppose.
967
00:55:56,979 --> 00:55:59,439
Is it for you?
Medium will be fine.
968
00:55:59,523 --> 00:56:02,025
Sure. Okay. Your vibrators
start at 10.95 and go up.
969
00:56:02,109 --> 00:56:07,071
We've got the Salami,
the Man-O-War and Alien.
970
00:56:07,156 --> 00:56:08,906
Just give me the cheapest one.
971
00:56:08,991 --> 00:56:10,825
Wait a minute.
There's nothing cheap about my store.
972
00:56:10,909 --> 00:56:12,577
You mean inexpensive, don't you?
973
00:56:12,661 --> 00:56:14,704
Isn't that what you meant?
Yes.
974
00:56:14,788 --> 00:56:17,999
That's what I thought you meant.
You want a cheap pair of handcuffs too?
975
00:56:18,083 --> 00:56:19,584
Yes.
976
00:56:19,668 --> 00:56:21,711
All right. You're gonna need
some lubricant for this vibrator.
977
00:56:21,795 --> 00:56:24,464
We've got K-Y and Lay-Orgy gel.
978
00:56:24,548 --> 00:56:26,799
Hey, you taste it,
you're gonna buy it, all right?
979
00:56:26,884 --> 00:56:32,138
The Lay-Orgy gel comes
in lemon, mint, cherry or trail mix.
980
00:56:32,222 --> 00:56:34,474
Trail mix?
I was making a joke.
981
00:56:36,185 --> 00:56:38,227
Just these three items will be fine.
982
00:56:38,312 --> 00:56:41,230
You know, you're probably
gonna need some stay-hard roll-on.
983
00:56:41,315 --> 00:56:42,982
No, thank you.
Some titty lube?
984
00:56:43,067 --> 00:56:44,108
No.
China Shrink Cream?
985
00:56:44,193 --> 00:56:46,402
No.
Ben Wa Dancing Egg?
986
00:56:46,487 --> 00:56:48,780
Just these three items will be fine.
987
00:56:50,449 --> 00:56:52,992
Okay, hot rod. It comes to $19.50.
988
00:56:53,077 --> 00:56:56,871
But I'm tellin' ya, you're gonna need
a lubricant for this vibrator.
989
00:56:56,955 --> 00:56:59,457
Unless your date's inflatable. Ha!
990
00:56:59,541 --> 00:57:05,505
For your information, I am buying this
to use as a novelty cocktail stirrer.
991
00:57:05,589 --> 00:57:07,256
Sure!
992
00:57:55,806 --> 00:57:58,599
Paul, nobody is trying to kill you.
993
00:57:58,684 --> 00:58:00,476
We're the ones who are killing people.
994
00:58:00,561 --> 00:58:03,354
Twice he tried to run me down,
the rotten little beaner.
995
00:58:03,438 --> 00:58:05,940
What rotten little beaner?
Guess.
996
00:58:06,024 --> 00:58:08,568
Paul, did you actually
see Raoul driving the car?
997
00:58:08,652 --> 00:58:10,987
No, he was wearing
some kind of ski mask or something.
998
00:58:11,071 --> 00:58:14,198
You said it was a Toyota.
Have you ever seen Raoul in a Toyota?
999
00:58:14,283 --> 00:58:17,952
Well, maybe he borrowed it. How do I know?
Maybe he stole it. It was definitely him.
1000
00:58:18,036 --> 00:58:21,330
Paul, I think you're jumping to conclusions,
and I don't want to discuss it anymore.
1001
00:58:21,415 --> 00:58:23,708
Now why don't you help me
with these letters?
1002
00:58:24,501 --> 00:58:26,169
What's a basket job?
1003
01:00:47,811 --> 01:00:49,729
Hey, I thought you said 50 cents a pound.
1004
01:00:49,813 --> 01:00:53,983
That's for trimmed, man.
For this stuff, you're lucky to get 30.
1005
01:00:54,067 --> 01:00:56,235
Hey, all right.
I should have trimmed it. You're right.
1006
01:00:56,320 --> 01:00:58,571
All right, man.
We got some driving to do. Let's go.
1007
01:01:03,285 --> 01:01:05,328
Dog food?
Doggie King brand.
1008
01:01:05,412 --> 01:01:08,789
Oh, well. So what? Who cares?
As long as we get our cut.
1009
01:01:08,874 --> 01:01:11,625
Mary, what if somebody recognizes
a piece of clothing or jewelry?
1010
01:01:11,710 --> 01:01:13,711
That's not likely.
What if somebody finds out
1011
01:01:13,795 --> 01:01:16,297
what the night crew at Doggie King
is feeding into their grinder?
1012
01:01:16,381 --> 01:01:18,299
I am sure that Raoul
knows what he's doing.
1013
01:01:18,383 --> 01:01:21,510
I'll say he does. You know where
he's getting most of the money?
1014
01:01:21,595 --> 01:01:23,596
From the cars.
Cars?
1015
01:01:23,680 --> 01:01:25,514
The cars. Something we never thought of.
1016
01:01:25,599 --> 01:01:27,892
He takes the car keys
out of those people's pockets
1017
01:01:27,976 --> 01:01:30,936
and then he figures out which of the cars
parked downstairs belong to them
1018
01:01:31,021 --> 01:01:33,439
and then he sells the cars
for a lot of money
1019
01:01:33,523 --> 01:01:35,441
a lot more than he's splitting with us.
1020
01:01:35,525 --> 01:01:37,318
I don't believe you.
1021
01:01:37,402 --> 01:01:40,446
Mary, he's making thousands
of dollars from those cars.
1022
01:01:40,530 --> 01:01:43,866
Nonsense.
We'll see if it's nonsense when I confront him with it tonight.
1023
01:01:43,950 --> 01:01:47,203
Listen to me, Paul. In a couple of weeks
we will have everything we wanted.
1024
01:01:47,287 --> 01:01:50,790
Until then, what is the point of making trouble?
I'll tell you what's the point.
1025
01:01:50,874 --> 01:01:54,877
That son of a bitch is making a play for my
wife and trying to kill me. That's the point.
1026
01:01:54,961 --> 01:01:57,880
Oh, my God. My 9:00.
1027
01:01:59,674 --> 01:02:01,634
Hello?
1028
01:02:01,718 --> 01:02:04,220
Just a minute.
1029
01:02:04,304 --> 01:02:06,263
Just a minute.
1030
01:02:06,348 --> 01:02:08,307
Keep your shirt on.
1031
01:02:08,392 --> 01:02:11,310
Vayos con Dios indeed.
1032
01:02:11,395 --> 01:02:13,062
Paula?
I said just a minute.
1033
01:02:13,146 --> 01:02:15,231
Paul, I can't find the pants
to this costume. I'm
1034
01:02:15,315 --> 01:02:16,982
I'm coming.
1035
01:02:17,067 --> 01:02:19,360
Oh, Paula!
Fuck the costume.
1036
01:02:24,366 --> 01:02:27,076
Doggie King
1037
01:02:27,160 --> 01:02:31,372
Your Majesty, this is delicious.
1038
01:02:31,456 --> 01:02:33,582
Really!
1039
01:02:33,667 --> 01:02:38,212
Nothing but the finest
for me and my best friends.
1040
01:02:39,214 --> 01:02:41,006
What makes doggies happy?
1041
01:02:41,091 --> 01:02:42,842
It's a simple thing
1042
01:02:45,512 --> 01:02:47,263
Well, what a surprise.
1043
01:02:47,347 --> 01:02:49,348
I hope you don't mind
my dropping in like this.
1044
01:02:49,433 --> 01:02:51,642
Of course not.
Please forgive the condition of the house.
1045
01:02:51,726 --> 01:02:54,270
Frank had some old army buddies
in last night, and
1046
01:02:54,354 --> 01:02:56,689
Please.
Well
1047
01:02:56,773 --> 01:02:58,649
So, how's it going?
1048
01:02:58,733 --> 01:03:00,609
Great. Of course
1049
01:03:00,694 --> 01:03:04,196
It is a mixed bag.
Some of those people that come to us
1050
01:03:04,281 --> 01:03:06,282
Pretty gross?
It's not just that.
1051
01:03:06,366 --> 01:03:09,994
Some of them are into fantasies that
require a great deal of acting ability
1052
01:03:10,078 --> 01:03:13,581
and while Mary has gotten a whole lot
better in the last few weeks
1053
01:03:13,665 --> 01:03:16,500
there's one situation where I'm afraid
1054
01:03:16,585 --> 01:03:18,377
You need a pro.
Exactly.
1055
01:03:18,462 --> 01:03:20,588
Mary doesn't know anything
about this, of course.
1056
01:03:20,672 --> 01:03:22,882
I didn't want to hurt her feelings.
You understand.
1057
01:03:22,966 --> 01:03:28,137
Of course.
So, what's the deal? Full costume?
1058
01:03:28,221 --> 01:03:29,221
Yes.
1059
01:03:29,306 --> 01:03:32,057
But not the type you're used to.
1060
01:03:32,142 --> 01:03:34,602
Excuse me.
1061
01:03:35,896 --> 01:03:37,605
Excuse me.
1062
01:03:40,984 --> 01:03:43,360
Do you believe in the sixth sense?
1063
01:03:43,445 --> 01:03:45,488
I think I gave you over a dollar.
No, no, no, no.
1064
01:03:45,572 --> 01:03:49,658
The sixth sense.
Some blind people have it. I have it.
1065
01:03:49,743 --> 01:03:52,203
May I sit down?
Yeah. Go ahead.
1066
01:03:57,751 --> 01:04:01,086
You have been very wicked,
and you are in terrible danger.
1067
01:04:01,171 --> 01:04:03,881
So is everybody who eats here.
1068
01:04:05,342 --> 01:04:08,886
You have been earning money
from an evil undertaking
1069
01:04:08,970 --> 01:04:13,807
and if you keep it up,
you will burn for all eternity in hell.
1070
01:04:13,892 --> 01:04:16,393
Hey, sister. I'm in hell right now.
1071
01:04:16,478 --> 01:04:18,395
That money's gonna help get me out.
1072
01:04:21,024 --> 01:04:24,485
That money is gonna bring
a curse down on you!
1073
01:04:24,569 --> 01:04:28,781
You'll have more bad luck
than you ever dreamed possible!
1074
01:04:29,574 --> 01:04:31,492
Not religious?
1075
01:04:31,576 --> 01:04:35,246
Doris, when we get through with him, he'll be
happy to clean the latrines at a leper colony.
1076
01:04:35,330 --> 01:04:37,456
Unleash the border patrol.
1077
01:04:43,797 --> 01:04:45,714
Mr. Raoul Mendoza?
1078
01:04:45,799 --> 01:04:47,633
Maybe.
1079
01:04:47,717 --> 01:04:51,387
I'm with the immigration Department.
May I see your green card, please?
1080
01:04:51,471 --> 01:04:53,389
I'll see you later, man.
1081
01:04:53,473 --> 01:04:56,058
Green card? What are you talking about?
I ain't no wetback.
1082
01:04:56,142 --> 01:04:58,852
According to our information
1083
01:04:58,937 --> 01:05:01,063
your birth certificate is a forgery.
1084
01:05:01,147 --> 01:05:05,234
You got the wrong Mendoza, baby.
Sure, all you vatos say that.
1085
01:05:05,318 --> 01:05:07,736
Hey, you don't scare me any.
This is all talk.
1086
01:05:07,821 --> 01:05:10,906
Oh, yeah? Well, you better get
while the getting's good.
1087
01:05:10,991 --> 01:05:14,159
This time tomorrow I'm gonna have
enough on you to drop-kick your ass
1088
01:05:14,244 --> 01:05:16,161
back over the Rio Grande.
1089
01:05:16,246 --> 01:05:18,998
Hasta la vista, cholo.
1090
01:05:19,082 --> 01:05:23,127
Nervous and flustered, eh? But you don't see
him jumping on the next plane for Mexico City?
1091
01:05:23,211 --> 01:05:25,254
Okay, we better escalate to plan C.
1092
01:05:28,425 --> 01:05:31,176
Who is it?
Health inspector.
1093
01:05:36,725 --> 01:05:39,977
Hi. Mr. Raoul Mendoza?
1094
01:05:40,061 --> 01:05:42,438
¿Cómo está usted?
1095
01:05:42,522 --> 01:05:45,274
I'm Sally Cummings
from the L.A. Health Department
1096
01:05:45,358 --> 01:05:50,446
and I've been sent here by the city to warn
everyone on your socioeconomic level
1097
01:05:50,530 --> 01:05:53,824
about an epidemic of a new kind
of venereal disease.
1098
01:05:53,908 --> 01:05:56,201
Hey, lady.
Don't worry about me. I'm clean.
1099
01:05:56,286 --> 01:05:58,287
Of course you are.
1100
01:05:58,371 --> 01:06:01,040
Just look on this as a free checkup.
1101
01:06:07,756 --> 01:06:11,884
You want me to strip?
No, just open your mouth.
1102
01:06:13,011 --> 01:06:14,386
Okay.
1103
01:06:14,471 --> 01:06:16,847
Fine.
1104
01:06:16,931 --> 01:06:20,601
Now, breathe deeply.
1105
01:06:22,896 --> 01:06:28,317
Have you had any headaches,
earaches or persistent sores?
1106
01:06:28,401 --> 01:06:30,069
Only when I skip foreplay.
1107
01:06:30,153 --> 01:06:35,282
Very funny. Now, let me see your eyes.
1108
01:06:35,367 --> 01:06:37,910
You've got it!
1109
01:06:37,994 --> 01:06:41,121
But don't worry. It can be controlled.
1110
01:06:41,206 --> 01:06:45,793
Here. Just take two of these
each time you have sexual relations.
1111
01:06:45,877 --> 01:06:48,420
Before or after?
Before.
1112
01:06:48,505 --> 01:06:50,381
Well, you better give me
about five of these.
1113
01:06:50,465 --> 01:06:52,841
I'm a guy that really likes to party.
You know what I mean?
1114
01:06:52,926 --> 01:06:54,885
Now make sure you take those.
Otherwise
1115
01:06:54,969 --> 01:06:57,513
we can't be responsible
for the consequences.
1116
01:06:57,597 --> 01:07:00,516
You wouldn't want to end up like this.
1117
01:07:02,602 --> 01:07:05,104
IChingao!
What's wrong?
1118
01:07:07,941 --> 01:07:10,067
I better take some more of these pills.
1119
01:07:10,151 --> 01:07:11,694
What pills?
1120
01:07:11,778 --> 01:07:15,531
Oh, you know,
they're they're like vitamins.
1121
01:07:16,783 --> 01:07:19,034
Damn. I can't get the top off.
Here. Let me.
1122
01:07:21,871 --> 01:07:23,664
You better give me two of 'em.
1123
01:07:23,748 --> 01:07:26,875
Who gave these to you?
A nurse. Why?
1124
01:07:28,002 --> 01:07:30,295
They don't look like vitamins.
1125
01:07:31,756 --> 01:07:33,424
These are saltpeter.
1126
01:07:33,508 --> 01:07:36,135
That's what they give little kids in camp
so they don't play with themselves.
1127
01:07:36,219 --> 01:07:38,303
What?
If you want to force me to make love to you
1128
01:07:38,388 --> 01:07:39,972
you better not take any more of these.
1129
01:07:40,056 --> 01:07:42,307
Son of a bitch!
1130
01:07:42,392 --> 01:07:44,935
Your husband did this.
Did what?
1131
01:07:45,019 --> 01:07:47,604
God, he's fixed it
so I can't make love to you.
1132
01:07:48,857 --> 01:07:50,357
Scalpel.
Scalpel.
1133
01:07:50,442 --> 01:07:51,567
Suture.
Suture.
1134
01:07:51,651 --> 01:07:53,610
Frying pan.
1135
01:07:58,491 --> 01:08:00,284
Well, there's one consideration.
1136
01:08:00,368 --> 01:08:04,079
If you'd done what he'd asked,
he would have died anyway.
1137
01:08:04,164 --> 01:08:06,790
The funny thing is
is that he is a real doctor.
1138
01:08:06,875 --> 01:08:10,043
I recognize him from the hospital.
What a world.
1139
01:08:14,591 --> 01:08:18,010
Hello? James. Nice of you to call.
1140
01:08:18,094 --> 01:08:21,764
Yes. Of course
we're still interested in the house.
1141
01:08:21,848 --> 01:08:23,766
They have.
1142
01:08:23,850 --> 01:08:26,560
Oh, they are.
1143
01:08:26,644 --> 01:08:29,438
No. We'll just see what we can do.
1144
01:08:29,522 --> 01:08:32,232
Okay. Thank you, James.
1145
01:08:32,317 --> 01:08:34,234
Bye.
1146
01:08:34,319 --> 01:08:36,820
Don't tell me.
There's been another offer on our house?
1147
01:08:36,905 --> 01:08:39,907
We have to come up
with $25,000 by Friday
1148
01:08:39,991 --> 01:08:44,036
or another couple is gonna take the place and
turn it into a clinic for rich, fat people.
1149
01:08:44,120 --> 01:08:46,079
Nobody is getting that house but us.
1150
01:08:46,164 --> 01:08:49,124
We'll just have to speed up production.
Speed up production?
1151
01:08:51,169 --> 01:08:55,380
What about that ritzy swingers party Doris is going to tonight?
The one with the hot tub.
1152
01:08:57,050 --> 01:08:59,301
Hi, swingers. I'm Howard Swine
1153
01:08:59,385 --> 01:09:01,136
your horny host
that's hung with the most.
1154
01:09:01,221 --> 01:09:04,973
Though I hate to boast,
I'm big as a post and warm as toast!
1155
01:09:05,058 --> 01:09:08,644
Cool it, Howard. Those are all the things
he couldn't say on the radio
1156
01:09:08,728 --> 01:09:12,648
so now he's making up
for lost time constantly.
1157
01:09:12,732 --> 01:09:15,150
I'm so glad you decided to come.
1158
01:09:15,235 --> 01:09:17,152
I come whether I decide to or not.
1159
01:09:17,237 --> 01:09:20,572
Great, Howard.
Why don't you go now?
1160
01:09:20,657 --> 01:09:23,033
Hey. You can't fluff me off like that.
1161
01:09:23,117 --> 01:09:25,786
I'm your host -
your horny host that's hung with the most.
1162
01:09:25,870 --> 01:09:29,623
Though I hate to boast,
I'm big as a post and warm as toast!
1163
01:09:29,707 --> 01:09:32,501
I knew this party
would be full of assholes.
1164
01:09:32,585 --> 01:09:33,877
It's Doris!
1165
01:09:33,962 --> 01:09:38,549
Oh, beat me, Doris! Work me!
Make me write bad checks!
1166
01:09:38,633 --> 01:09:40,342
Cash his check!
Scum!
1167
01:09:40,426 --> 01:09:43,345
You better beg for mercy.
Give him hell!
1168
01:09:43,429 --> 01:09:45,013
Harder. Harder!
1169
01:09:47,767 --> 01:09:52,020
All these bozos have to pretend like
it's all a joke in front of their friends.
1170
01:09:52,105 --> 01:09:55,107
But half of them will look me up for real next week.
Go, go, go.
1171
01:09:55,191 --> 01:09:58,318
He'll be back for more.
Happy hunting.
1172
01:09:58,403 --> 01:10:02,406
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
1173
01:10:02,490 --> 01:10:06,952
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go
1174
01:10:07,036 --> 01:10:10,038
go, go, go, go, go, go!
1175
01:10:10,123 --> 01:10:12,207
Oh, my. Is she all right?
What happened?
1176
01:10:12,292 --> 01:10:14,418
To fine food.
And great wine.
1177
01:10:15,795 --> 01:10:17,462
Mountain Brook!
1178
01:10:17,547 --> 01:10:20,716
Just be as honest with me as you can.
Okay. You're a creep.
1179
01:10:20,800 --> 01:10:22,718
All right. Now let me rephrase that.
1180
01:10:22,802 --> 01:10:26,346
Hi. My name is Susan. What's yours?
1181
01:10:26,431 --> 01:10:28,932
I'm Paul, and this is my wife, Mary.
1182
01:10:29,017 --> 01:10:32,227
Well, I'm very pleased
to make your acquaintance.
1183
01:10:32,312 --> 01:10:35,272
I was just saying
to my husband Moose over there
1184
01:10:35,356 --> 01:10:38,066
you're a highly unusual looking couple.
1185
01:10:38,151 --> 01:10:41,820
We were wondering if you'd like to
get together with us and have a little fun.
1186
01:10:41,905 --> 01:10:43,614
What did you have in mind?
1187
01:10:43,698 --> 01:10:46,033
Gee, we're up for about anything.
1188
01:10:46,117 --> 01:10:49,578
You see, we're both bi,
so we can go either way.
1189
01:10:49,662 --> 01:10:52,664
But actually, we do like straight sex.
1190
01:10:52,749 --> 01:10:55,959
Moose is into voyeurism
1191
01:10:56,044 --> 01:10:59,296
and I'm into exhibitionism.
1192
01:10:59,380 --> 01:11:03,300
Oh, we like B&D, but we don't like S&M.
1193
01:11:03,384 --> 01:11:05,385
We met at the A&P.
1194
01:11:07,555 --> 01:11:09,264
But we don't like labels.
1195
01:11:09,349 --> 01:11:12,100
Speaking of labels,
that's a marvelous outfit you have on.
1196
01:11:12,185 --> 01:11:13,852
Did you get it at Saks?
1197
01:11:13,937 --> 01:11:15,896
Saks?
1198
01:11:15,980 --> 01:11:19,149
Oh, no.
I got the whole thing at Penney's.
1199
01:11:19,233 --> 01:11:23,779
Very nice of you to ask us,
but we're actually into Saint Bernards.
1200
01:11:23,863 --> 01:11:26,323
Oh, really?
1201
01:11:28,409 --> 01:11:30,869
Well, see you around.
1202
01:11:30,954 --> 01:11:32,913
Moose, honey, they're into doggies.
1203
01:11:32,997 --> 01:11:34,873
Dogs?
They're at the right party.
1204
01:11:34,958 --> 01:11:40,087
Oh, but look. There are two Guccis
coming on to a Pierre Cardin. Let's go.
1205
01:11:40,171 --> 01:11:43,006
Mary, if I'm really gonna throw myself
into this, I need a stiff drink.
1206
01:11:43,091 --> 01:11:46,635
Can I get you one?
Oh, no. I think I'll check out the ladies' room.
1207
01:11:46,719 --> 01:11:49,137
Meet you back here.
Okay.
The chick was so fat
1208
01:11:49,222 --> 01:11:52,099
the whole thing just tore loose
from the ceiling and almost killed me.
1209
01:11:52,225 --> 01:11:55,394
Some basket job.
Yeah? Well, you get what you pay for.
1210
01:11:55,478 --> 01:11:57,187
In Tijuana?
1211
01:12:09,909 --> 01:12:13,370
Mrs. Bland. Fancy meeting you here.
1212
01:12:14,956 --> 01:12:19,167
Not so old-fashioned
as you pretended after all?
1213
01:12:19,252 --> 01:12:21,753
Excuse me, Mr. Leech.
You know, that little scene
1214
01:12:21,838 --> 01:12:24,756
you played the other day
in my office really turned me on.
1215
01:12:24,841 --> 01:12:28,510
You've no idea. I kept wondering
what the passion was like
1216
01:12:28,594 --> 01:12:31,888
with the hair down and the clothes off.
1217
01:12:31,973 --> 01:12:35,767
And now, I am going to
find out for myself.
1218
01:12:56,831 --> 01:12:59,750
Where are the ludes?
1219
01:13:17,477 --> 01:13:19,644
Hold it up. Hold the bitch up.
1220
01:13:21,314 --> 01:13:23,106
Okay, you two. Mush!
1221
01:13:23,191 --> 01:13:24,941
Good night, Doris!
1222
01:13:31,407 --> 01:13:33,950
Paul.
There you are. I was wondering what happened to you.
1223
01:13:34,035 --> 01:13:35,994
Paul, we have to get out of here.
We have to go now.
1224
01:13:36,079 --> 01:13:37,996
You two don't seem to be joining
in the fun and games.
1225
01:13:38,081 --> 01:13:40,290
Do you have V.D., or are you here as tourists?
Neither.
1226
01:13:40,374 --> 01:13:42,209
What is your scene anyway?
1227
01:13:42,293 --> 01:13:45,754
We invite swingers to our place
and then murder them for their money.
1228
01:13:51,761 --> 01:13:53,178
Great, man.
1229
01:13:54,347 --> 01:13:56,306
Have you lost your mind?
Why did you say that?
1230
01:13:56,390 --> 01:13:58,809
Oh, why not? He's forgotten already.
1231
01:13:58,893 --> 01:14:01,603
Paul, you're getting drunk.
1232
01:14:01,687 --> 01:14:03,772
Paul, I just killed Mr. Leech.
1233
01:14:03,856 --> 01:14:05,607
You know, Mr. Leech from the bank.
1234
01:14:05,691 --> 01:14:08,193
Yeah? Well, I just stepped on
Mr. Snail from the garden.
1235
01:14:08,277 --> 01:14:11,279
No, Paul. I'm not joking.
He came on to me in the bathroom
1236
01:14:11,364 --> 01:14:13,198
and I killed him with a rattail comb.
1237
01:14:13,282 --> 01:14:15,117
Sounds messy.
Did he have a lot on him?
1238
01:14:15,201 --> 01:14:17,744
Yes, but I couldn't get it.
I had to throw him out the window.
1239
01:14:17,829 --> 01:14:19,329
Out the window?
Yes. Here.
1240
01:14:19,413 --> 01:14:21,623
But Is that him?
1241
01:14:21,707 --> 01:14:23,667
Come on. We can get that money.
1242
01:14:23,751 --> 01:14:27,170
Come on. Come on, everybody.
It's hot tub time!
1243
01:14:27,255 --> 01:14:30,715
Come on! Come on, everybody!
Out of your clothes and into the tub!
1244
01:14:30,800 --> 01:14:32,467
In the tub!
1245
01:14:32,552 --> 01:14:34,719
Last one in is a lousy lay!
1246
01:14:51,404 --> 01:14:53,905
Hey! You two spoilsports.
1247
01:14:53,990 --> 01:14:56,032
What are you doing
over there by the fence?
1248
01:14:56,117 --> 01:14:57,868
None of your damn business!
1249
01:14:57,952 --> 01:15:02,289
I'm the host here, goddamn it. Now get out
of your clothes and get into the hot tub
1250
01:15:02,373 --> 01:15:04,499
or get the hell out!
Yeah!
1251
01:15:04,584 --> 01:15:07,836
We don't want any wet blankets
or spoilsports at this party.
1252
01:15:07,920 --> 01:15:10,589
We're here to swing, aren't we, kids?
1253
01:15:10,673 --> 01:15:13,425
Oh, yeah? Well, swing on this.
1254
01:15:18,264 --> 01:15:22,225
Okay, that's 3,000 there. This is 429.
1255
01:15:22,310 --> 01:15:25,770
And this is Oh. One, two, three
1256
01:15:25,855 --> 01:15:28,690
Hello? One-Way Auto?
1257
01:15:28,774 --> 01:15:31,860
Do you have one of those
double-decker car carriers?
1258
01:15:31,944 --> 01:15:34,321
Well, bring it over to 1510 Blue Jay Way.
1259
01:15:34,405 --> 01:15:36,323
We've got a bonanza for you.
1260
01:15:45,333 --> 01:15:49,044
Give me the cash, Jack
No money back
1261
01:15:49,128 --> 01:15:52,214
Give me the green, Gene
No in-between
1262
01:15:52,298 --> 01:15:56,051
Give me those dollars, don't you holler
That's your money, honey
1263
01:15:56,135 --> 01:15:57,886
That's what I need
1264
01:15:59,889 --> 01:16:03,391
Give me the cash, Jack
No money back
1265
01:16:03,476 --> 01:16:06,937
Give me the green, Gene
No in-between
1266
01:16:07,021 --> 01:16:09,064
Ain't content without the rent
1267
01:16:09,148 --> 01:16:12,234
And as I said again
I need the loot
1268
01:16:12,318 --> 01:16:14,444
Yes, I do
1269
01:16:14,528 --> 01:16:17,280
Give me the cash, Jack
No money back
1270
01:16:17,365 --> 01:16:21,409
Give me the green, Gene
No in-between
1271
01:16:21,494 --> 01:16:23,495
I want to hold
some of that gold
1272
01:16:23,579 --> 01:16:26,456
And live a style well and fine
1273
01:16:28,167 --> 01:16:29,876
Give me the cash, Jack
1274
01:16:29,961 --> 01:16:31,753
No money back
1275
01:16:31,837 --> 01:16:35,382
Give me the green, Gene
No in-between
1276
01:16:35,466 --> 01:16:38,468
Oh, I can't believe it.
$40,000 in one night.
1277
01:16:38,552 --> 01:16:42,389
Yeah. Tomorrow we can call James,
move in to Paul and Mary's Country Kitchen.
1278
01:16:42,473 --> 01:16:44,432
Hey. Did you leave
the light on in the bedroom?
1279
01:16:44,517 --> 01:16:47,143
Paul, have you been drinking?
Where did you ge
1280
01:16:49,981 --> 01:16:54,776
So, not only do you try to
make me into a big maricón
1281
01:16:54,860 --> 01:16:58,446
but you sell cars behind my back
and don't even give me a cut.
1282
01:16:58,531 --> 01:17:00,407
Don't worry, chiquita.
1283
01:17:00,491 --> 01:17:02,951
The time has come to liberate you
from this husband of yours.
1284
01:17:03,035 --> 01:17:05,120
Listen, Raoul -
Shut up!
1285
01:17:05,204 --> 01:17:07,122
You're gonna dump me?
1286
01:17:07,206 --> 01:17:09,833
Well, Mary and me
are gonna dump you, ese.
1287
01:17:09,917 --> 01:17:12,252
Just when you get
this business going great
1288
01:17:12,336 --> 01:17:14,796
you want to take
this beautiful, sexy woman
1289
01:17:14,880 --> 01:17:18,008
and stick her in some country kitchen
and make her sweat for you?
1290
01:17:18,092 --> 01:17:19,801
What an asshole.
1291
01:17:19,885 --> 01:17:22,304
And she's such a lady that she don't even complain.
Raoul
1292
01:17:22,388 --> 01:17:24,472
Keep cool, baby. I know what I'm doing.
1293
01:17:24,557 --> 01:17:26,516
I got ambition.
1294
01:17:28,227 --> 01:17:31,187
We're gonna expand this business
1295
01:17:31,272 --> 01:17:34,065
bring in some real sexy
younger girls to dress up
1296
01:17:34,150 --> 01:17:37,777
instead of my wife,
who's gonna be too busy having my kids.
1297
01:17:37,862 --> 01:17:40,739
And while she's busy having your children,
the young sexy ones
1298
01:17:40,823 --> 01:17:42,198
Shut up!
1299
01:17:42,283 --> 01:17:45,577
Chiquita.
Yeah?
1300
01:17:45,661 --> 01:17:49,247
Go bring me that frying pan.
Hurry up.
1301
01:17:50,082 --> 01:17:51,583
Mary!
1302
01:17:51,667 --> 01:17:54,419
And we're gonna move into a place
that's real class.
1303
01:17:55,296 --> 01:17:57,339
Red velvet wallpaper
1304
01:17:57,423 --> 01:17:59,215
gold lamps
1305
01:17:59,300 --> 01:18:01,551
and those real good
black velvet paintings.
1306
01:18:01,635 --> 01:18:03,428
No cheap stuff.
1307
01:18:03,512 --> 01:18:05,722
I can't find it.
1308
01:18:05,806 --> 01:18:07,432
Come on.
1309
01:18:24,033 --> 01:18:27,369
Damn kids broke the compactor.
Must have put bottles in it or something.
1310
01:18:27,453 --> 01:18:31,039
Paul, what are we gonna do about Raoul?
Oh, don't worry about him.
1311
01:18:31,123 --> 01:18:33,958
Don't worry about him?
I'll drop him off at Doggie King.
1312
01:18:34,043 --> 01:18:39,297
Oh, Paul, would would you mind not
dropping him off at the dog food center?
1313
01:18:39,382 --> 01:18:42,258
Getting sentimental, Mary?
No.
1314
01:18:42,343 --> 01:18:44,928
Paul, there's something I never told you.
1315
01:18:45,012 --> 01:18:48,139
Raoul and I
1316
01:18:48,224 --> 01:18:49,891
I know.
No.
1317
01:18:49,975 --> 01:18:53,269
I know.
Oh, no, Paul. You don't know, because he
1318
01:18:53,354 --> 01:18:56,147
You see, what happened
is he forced me to smoke this drug
1319
01:18:56,232 --> 01:18:58,024
and then he raped me.
1320
01:18:58,109 --> 01:19:01,236
And then he told me that if I didn't
continue to have relations with him
1321
01:19:01,320 --> 01:19:04,239
that he was gonna tell you,
and I couldn't let anyone hurt you.
1322
01:19:04,323 --> 01:19:07,200
And so we continued -
He deserved everything he got
1323
01:19:07,284 --> 01:19:09,411
but that's all over now, okay?
1324
01:19:09,495 --> 01:19:12,914
Look. In an hour or so, we're gonna sign
the papers, give James the money
1325
01:19:12,998 --> 01:19:16,459
James! Paul, I forgot all about James.
We promised him dinner
1326
01:19:16,544 --> 01:19:18,378
I know.
And he's gonna be here in 45 minutes.
1327
01:19:18,462 --> 01:19:19,963
I'll go to the store and get something.
1328
01:19:20,047 --> 01:19:22,215
The store? You can't go to the store.
You don't have time.
1329
01:19:22,299 --> 01:19:25,427
Paul, we've got to improvise something.
1330
01:19:25,511 --> 01:19:28,346
You know, it's times like these,
when I see two great people
1331
01:19:28,431 --> 01:19:30,765
like you and Mary
get the house of your dreams
1332
01:19:30,850 --> 01:19:34,436
well, my job becomes something more than
just a thing you do from 9:00 to 5:00.
1333
01:19:34,520 --> 01:19:36,271
That's very kind of you, James.
1334
01:19:36,355 --> 01:19:38,273
Oh, listen. I mean it. Really.
1335
01:19:38,357 --> 01:19:40,859
I think it's great
that you made it without
1336
01:19:40,943 --> 01:19:42,902
knocking other people aside to get there.
1337
01:19:42,987 --> 01:19:45,989
That's a real compliment,
coming from a real estate dealer.
1338
01:19:46,073 --> 01:19:47,782
Maybe I ought to be a wine seller.
1339
01:19:47,867 --> 01:19:51,077
I didn't know there was so much money
selling those things door-to-door.
1340
01:19:51,162 --> 01:19:53,121
Are you all right?
1341
01:19:53,205 --> 01:19:55,665
Boy, is this stuff terrific.
1342
01:19:55,749 --> 01:19:58,543
Well, I hope you make this
a permanent item on your menu.
1343
01:19:59,628 --> 01:20:00,879
It's French.
1344
01:20:00,963 --> 01:20:03,715
No, actually, it's more Spanish.
1345
01:20:03,799 --> 01:20:05,800
It's so tender.
1346
01:20:05,885 --> 01:20:07,802
Yeah. I know.
1347
01:20:07,887 --> 01:20:12,015
It's amazing what you can do with a cheap
piece of meat if you know how to treat it.
1348
01:20:12,099 --> 01:20:14,893
And, of course, the right
wine always helps.
1349
01:20:14,977 --> 01:20:16,644
I'll drink to that.
1350
01:20:16,729 --> 01:20:20,982
Now I know why Mother
1351
01:20:21,066 --> 01:20:24,319
Taught me to be true
1352
01:20:24,403 --> 01:20:27,447
She meant me for someone
1353
01:20:27,531 --> 01:20:30,742
Exactly like you
108368
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