All language subtitles for Gilmore Girls S04E10 1080p WEB-DL DD+ 2.0 x264-TrollHD_track3_[und]

Previously
On "Gilmore girls"...

Jason stiles,
Look at you.

I want to be your partner.

You want to become my partner?
Yes.

I can take you out
To dinner tomorrow night.

I'm not having dinner
With you.

Talk to me about jason.

He's my father's partner.
I've known him forever.

Maybe you should just go out
And see what happens.

Dad would flip,

And mom hates him, so she would
See it as some personal attack,

And I'm just getting her off me
For spilling wine on the carpet.

I'm here.
I brought bagels.

Oh! Tobin!
Great, I'm starving.

Asher, this is
My granddaughter, rory,

And her friend,
Paris geller.

Paris.

I'd love to do a profile
On you for the paper.

Tomorrow work for you?

I do teach, you know.

What is he doing here?

He is the night manager.
It's day.

This is an emergency meeting.
I need him here.

I told you I cannot be
In the same room with him.

This is jason stiles.

You still have
Those reservations?

Why'd you change your mind?

There was this thing
With my mother.

Whatever it is
Your mother did today,

Do you think she might do it
Again tomorrow night?

I think there's
An excellent possibility.

It's culs-de-sac.

No way!
It is.

The plural of cul-de-sac
Is culs-de-sac?

Doesn't even
Sound like english.

That's because
It's french.

I hate to be
The bearer of bad news.

Words should sound right
To be right.

So what -- the plural of yo-yo
Is yos-yo?

Yeah, 'cause that sounds
So natural.

As natural as
Culs-de-sac.

Hey, when did lane
Start working here?
A couple days ago.

She filled out
An application,

And luke brought her in
For an interview.

An interview?
So official.

They sat in complete silence
For a full five minutes.

Then luke said,
"How you doing?"

And she said, "Good,"
And then he gave her the job.

So what do we get
Out of this?

We got someone on the inside
Now, a friend of ours.

And out of it,
We could get...

The secret things
He keeps back there.
His show-girl costume.

Extra jelly packets, butter,
Discarded day-old bread.

But we get that when we go
Dumpster diving.

Hey, luke.

Look at this.

Who? Lane?
She's superwaitress.

Able to leap tall pancakes
In a single bound.

Or is it panscake?

It's not gonna work out.

She's so good.

She's too good.

I'm not even sure why
She took the job.

I mean, I totally blew
The interview.

Hey, guys.

You got this, luke?
Yeah, I got it.

I need
That english muffin.

When there was a lull,

She cleaned the menus
Without being asked.

Do you mean mensu?
Stop it.

This isn't challenging enough.
She's gonna get bored.

Buy her a chemistry set.
Or a foosball table.

I should find something
To do.

Having help
Is stressing him.

Now, why do you have to get
Back to campus so early?

Classes don't start
For a couple of days.

I have a lot
Of stuff to do.

It'll be nice and quiet
With no roommates around.

Where are the roomsmate?

Janet's mountain-climbing,
Tanna's home,

And paris went skiing
With her boyfriend.

So you're just ignoring
The plural thing now?
Yeah.

You haven't mentioned paris'
Boyfriend in a while.

Everything good there?

Yeah.
Something's not right?

There's the weirdness of both
Of them being busy with school,

And he's miles away at
Princeton, but they're good.

She called me
From the slopes,

And they sounded like
They were having a blast.

Hey, luke,
Coffee in the corner.

Boy, maybe this lane/luke team
Isn't gonna work out.

Yeah.

Where do you think
Luke will go?

Maybe a big chain
Will take him on.

Wonder if he has
A forklift license.

He could
Redeem recyclables.

You mean recycsable?

* if you're out
On the road *

* feelin' lonely
And so cold *

* all you have to do
Is call my name *

* and I'll be there
On the next train *

* where you lead,
I will follow *

* anywhere that you tell me to

* if you need

* if you need

* you need me to be with you

* I will follow

* oh, oh, oh

* where you lead,
I will follow *

* any, anywhere
That you tell me to *

* if you need

* if you need

* you need me to be with you

* I will follow where you lead

This is in and out,

Pick a molding for the public
Areas, meeting adjourned.

No food sampling.
It's not on the agenda.

I have not seen sookie
Once this month

When she has not greeted me by
Shoving something in my mouth.

You sure it was food
Every time?

As long as super-low-rise jeans
Are the fashion for men,

I must stay trim or die.

[ sighs ]

Sookie:
Come on in!

How low are we
Talking here?

I've had to wax.
Subject over.

Ooh!

Ooh! This is nice.

That's my favorite, too.
Little pricey.

It's amazing how we always
Pick the pricey.

You guys want something
To drink?
No.

I made hot water for tea.

You like earl grey, right?

If you have some.

I have it all ready.
Earl grey...

And try this pizzelle.
I knew it!

This is a tasting.

I just need your opinion.

My opinion is you're trying
To fatten me out of a love life.

I thought you were celibate.
Not by choice.

You woke up davey.
You want to go
Check on him?

He'll be out here
In a second.

He's two months and already
Walking?

I'm missing
The big moments.

Tobin!
Tobin?

Hi. And I'm high around
This little thing.

He's such an angel.

Sookie: [ baby talk ]
Hello, little bubby.

Did that mean old michel
Wake you up?

I know I'm being punk'd.

We've got the whole team
Back together.

I'm ecstatic.
Did you know about this?

I heard that tobin
Was back in town,

But I didn't hear
You were the --

Baby's nanny?

Just till something more
Permanent comes along.

Davey fell for this guy
Lock, stock, and barrel.

It was love
At first sight.

My whole life is kids.
I have 11 nieces and nephews.

How joyous for you.

Tobin, we heard you'd moved.

Yes. Right after the old inn
Burned down.

I moved to utah because I heard
There's job opportunities

For industrious mormons.

I didn't know
You were a mormon.

I wasn't, so I became one.
The paperwork took weeks.

And I didn't know about
The alcohol thing.

They famously abstain.

No coffee either.

The choir's fabulous, but then
There's the funny underwear.

Then he called me from the road
And suggested this.

How wonderful.

I see you're trying
The pizzelles.

Are they not pieces of heaven
Shaped like cookies?

Wonderful.

They'd be perfect for breakfast,
Too, with cappuccino.

I've never thought of them
For breakfast.

It occurred to me.

You could serve them on that
Green platter we bought.

The colors would juxtapose
Nicely.

You went shopping together?

Yes, I turned sookie on
To a place

That sells hard-to-find
Kitchenwares.

I found some websites I'd like
To recommend to you, lorelai.

I spent a lot of time online
When I was a mormon.

There wasn't
Much else to do.

Is this not an inn meeting
For inn employees only?

Oh, shh!
It's okay, little baby.

I think your voice hits a pitch
That hurts his ears.

My voice has the same pitch
As anyone else's.

Michel hates babies.

I do not hate babies.

Babies hate you.
They do not hate me.

All I'm saying is we have
Limited time together,

The three of us, and we cannot
Afford to waste it,

The three of us,
And he's cutting in.

I'm not cutting in.

But the fact is, wherever
Sookie goes, the baby goes,

And wherever the baby goes,
I go -- it's my job.

We even made a little joke
Earlier --

The baby has
A meeting today.

[ both laugh ]

[ gasps ]
I love this.

We do, too.

Would you like a cup of tea,
Tobin?

Just a little lapsing oolong,
Please.

You knew that?
Yes, I did.

Come on!
Everyone does.

Did you?
Of course I did.

So everyone in
The entire world

Knew the plural of cul-de-sac
Was culs-de-sac?
Yes.

Okay. So mariah carey's out
With some friends,

And she's had a couple
Cocktails.

She glances down from the roof
And says,

"Oh, look at all those
Culs-de-sac."

Why are they on the roof?
It's a rooftop bar.

How have you
Been saying it?
Cul-de-sacs.

And no one
Ever corrected you?

No, because that's the way
It should be.

Even if it isn't technically
Correct,

It should be pronounced
That way.

Mom, just let it go.

I will never let this go.

Is there a dessert?
Yes, and we have a special
Surprise for you.

We brought it back
From switzerland.

We're getting
A mountain goat?

Let's go into
The living room.

Dessert from switzerland.
The land of chocolate.

Richard: you two are going
To love this.

Lorelai: is it as good as
Toblerone?

It's better
Than toblerone.

What is that?

It's marzipan.

Marzipan?

The finest marzipan in all of
Europe, made by cloistered nuns.

We toured their cloister --
It was right out of
"The sound of music."

What happened
To the chocolate?

You compared it to toblerone.
That's chocolate.

You brought up toblerone.

I just said it was better than
That because I think it is.

Marzipan is candy.
You like candy.

Marzipan is not candy.

It is a unique substance
Unto itself,

Like velveeta
Or plutonium.

You're not even
Going to try it?

I'll pass.
I'll try some, grandma.

Take the one with
The little pig on it.

We got the pigs for you and
The bunny for your mother.

Oh, you got me bunnies?

They're for whomever now.

Well, no.
I'll try a bunny.

Don't force yourself.

I want a bunny.

Delicious.

Richard: those nuns kick
You-know-what.

Now, who can that be?
It's probably jason.

He said he might drop
Something by on his way
Back from the airport.

Emily:
In the middle of dinner?

Richard:
He won't be here long.

The flight from australia
Is draining.

Jason, welcome back.

I didn't mean to interrupt
Your evening.

Look how fit he looks,
Emily.

He looks very fit.
Hello, jason.

You've met lorelai and rory.

It's nice to see you again.

Richard,
Here are the papers,

And they do not need
To be notarized.

Oh, that's a huge help.

So, mom, maybe our guest
Would, uh...

Oh, jason, would you like
Some marzipan?

Would I?
I love marzipan.

Take as much as you like and put
Some extra into a napkin,

Just not the one lorelai
Spat her piece into.

Mmm. Delicious.

Mm-hmm.
Oh, I'll be going.

It was good to see you all
Again.

No, no, no, richard.
You don't have to see me out.

See you tomorrow.

He must have been hiking
The whole time.

He looks wonderful.

Excuse me.

Have you swallowed
Your marzipan yet?

Mm-hmm.

Mnh-mnh.

Jason: hello?

Um, so, you're back.

I am no hologram.

Australia was good?

Very good. Hot.

You tie your wallaby down,
Sport?

[ laughs ]

No, I just drank a lot of beer
And thought about you a lot.

That's very sweet.

So when are we getting
Together again?

When do you want?
How 'bout now?

Too spontaneous.
How about monday night?

For what?
Dinner, et cetera.

Sounds good, et cetera.
I'll call you.

What are you gonna do
With your marzipan?

I'll just serve it
To the clients I don't like.

Well, bye.

I'll see you monday.

Man:
Almost done here, young lady.

You were smart.

You come back early,
You beat the rush.

I just wanted to get a jump
On things.

I like the campus when it's
Kind of empty like this,

You know -- all quiet.

Snow's pretty, too.
Yeah, very pretty.

There's something very magical
About this campus.

I've been here 23 years
Come august,

And I've never been bored.

You okay?

What?

You feeling okay?
Yes.

I, uh...Yes.
Thanks.

Rory.

Paris, hi.
You're back early.

You're back early.
Just thought I'd get a jump
On things.

How was your trip?
Thought I'd come back early.

Where's your stuff?

Well, I got back early this
Morning, so I unpacked,

And then I went
To visit my mom.

She good?
She wasn't there.

Jamie says hello.
Hello back at him.

So you guys have fun?

I told you that
On the phone.

You have fun after that?

The resort was beautiful --
A little too star-studded.

Harrison ford and
Calista flockhart were there.

They tongue-kiss in public.

Then she'd tickle his tummy,
And he'd giggle -- it was foul.

To each his own.

I'll get out of your way.

I'll get out of your way.
You're not in my way.

I'll just stay here then.
Good.

[ sighs ]

And scene.

What are you doing?
Oh! God! Rory!
Announce yourself!

Were you brushing dirt
Under the sink?

No, I'm brushing crumbs
Under the sink.

You're a pig.

You're just learning that?
Why are you here, anyway?

Oh, crabby and dirty.

I thought you were going to hang
At school for some alone time.

Alone time suddenly included
Paris.

I thought paris was skiing
With jamie.

Paris is definitely
Not skiing,

And paris is definitely
Not with jamie.

There are little marshmallow
Easter bunnies under here.

No, what did you mean when you
Said paris was not with jamie?

Paris is seeing
Somebody else.

A psychiatrist?
A professor.

At yale?
Yes.

Lorelai gilmore, you've been
Holding out on me.

It's so weird.

One minute, she's in love
With jamie and then the next,

She's making out with
A professor in a dark corner.

You saw them making out?

Apparently, the big game
Was big for everyone.

I can't believe paris
Is doing an older man.

Who said doing?
I just said kissing, that's it.

Rory, come on.

When you're dating
An older man,

You're probably doing
Older-man things.

So what age are we talking here,
Like 35, 40?

45? 46?

47? 47 1/2? 48?

60!
Shut up!

He went to school
With grandpa.

That's how they met.
We were having lunch.

He came by.
Grandpa introduced them.

She wanted to get an interview,
And apparently, she got one.

60? Like 60 60?

I'm sorry.

Now I know who woody allen's
Next leading lady's gonna be.

And it's so annoying.

She's hiding it from me,
So I'm not supposed to know.

I'm supposed to think
She's still with jamie,
Which she's not.

Are you sure?
No.

I don't like intrigue.
I don't want intrigue.

I like jamie.
He's a nice guy.

Paris should not be treating him
Like this.

Honey, if she likes
Another guy,

There's nothing you can do
About it.

Let us all remember dean.

This is not
The same as dean.

I did not cheat on dean
With an old guy.

Is the old guy married?
He was.

He has kids, grown kids.

What would the school say
If they knew about this?

Yes, what about that?

This guy's risking everything --
His job, his reputation.

He'll always have paris.

How long have you been waiting
With that one?

I just had a feeling
The opportunity would
Present itself.

Maybe it's a phase.
It'll pass.

Yeah, or he will.

Hello?

What?

Michel?
Calm down.

I can't understand you

When you're not
Screaming hysterically.

Okay, well,
What are you --

Okay!
Okay, I'll be right there.

Goodbye. I gotta go.
Why? What's up?

Michel's spazzing.
Why?

Will you be here
When I get back?

If you don't mind.

Paris was getting out her
Potter's wheel as I was leaving.

I'll go pick up chinese.

Or we can just eat
What's under the sink.

Get egg rolls.

All right, just watch out.
Old guys don't like 'em bossy.

You took so long!
Why?

You need to charter
An airplane?

I came as quickly as I --
Ow!

What is going on?
Move quicker, please.

Is sookie here?
She and the farmer
Went to see a movie.

Do they know you're here?
Yes, they do.

And they're okay
With that?

Michel, stop.
What's going on?

I offered to babysit.
I'm sorry, you did what?

I heard sookie talking
To the potato man about
Wanting to go out,

And there was no one
To watch the baby,

So I offered to watch it
For her.

Watch him for her.

And she let you?
Yes, she let me.

I came over, and the minute that
She left, it started to cry.

He started to cry.
He wouldn't stop.

I did the jiggle and the bouncy
And the airplane.

And then I even picked it up.

I picked him up,
But it didn't matter.

He wouldn't stop crying.
So finally I invented a game.

What kind of game?
I called it baby crepe.

I don't think I know that one.
It's quite ingenious.

You get down on the floor and
You roll him up in a blanket

And then you pull it back
And forth and back and forth.

He loved it.
He did not cry.

He smiled, he giggled.

He was having the time
Of his life.

And then, I pulled back
The blanket a little too hard,

And he rolled under the bed,
And he got stuck.

Oh, my god!

I tried to get him out,

But I couldn't get him to grab
The string,

And then he fell asleep,
And I worried if I woke him up,

The screaming
Would start again.

I can't believe you rolled
Little davey under the bed.

Davey?
Yes, davey -- sookie's baby.

I've been calling him truman.
Why?

I thought that's
What his name was.

Where'd you get truman from?

Do you think he's gonna
Hold this against me?

The man that rolled him
Under the bed?

No, I think you're good.

Man, he really is sleeping.
He looks so peaceful.

See? I made him happy.

We need to lift this bed
And get him up.

What are you doing?
Taking off my shirt.

What part of "Lift the bed
And get him out"

Translates to you taking off
Your shirt?

This is an expensive shirt.

I'm not lifting the bed
With a naked you.

I wasn't going to take off
My pants.

Leave the shirt on.
It will wrinkle.

Not as much as it will
If sookie comes home

And finds truman
Under the bed.

Lift up here,
And I'll get him out.

I can't hold this by myself.
Are you crazy?

Are you ready?
No!

Hey. Hey, davey.

I gotcha.

[ grunts ]

You're snoozy, huh?

How is he?
He's just fine.

He's just fine.

There you go.
Just kick back.

Wait till mommy gets home.

Now please tell me
What is going on here.

Nothing.

Why are you babysitting?

You hate babies.
Not really.

You do not babysit -- ever.

And yet here you are wearing
Your super-low-cut jeans

Making up baby games,
And I want to know why.

I hate tobin!

He's a sniveling, little tushie
Kisser, and I hate him!

He weasels his way into
Every area of my life.

The only good thing about the
Independence inn burning down

Was that tobin was gone,
But yet, here he is, back.

He's like the cat.

The one that came back
The very next day.

"You thought he was a goner,
But the cat came back.

He just wouldn't stay away."

Michel, you do not have
To be jealous of tobin.

He wants to replace me.

As what?
As everything.

He wants to replace me
In my entire life.

He's going to keep
Worming his way in

Until you no longer find any
Reason to have me around.

You're being silly.
He's going to succeed.

It doesn't matter that I have
All the experience

And the credentials and
The history to run this inn.

He likes the baby.
He holds the baby.

He doesn't roll the baby
Under the bed -- he wins!

Oh, he does not win.

Michel, this rivalry
Is in your head.

It is, huh?
Yes.

So you do not like tobin
Better than me?

No. We like tobin.

We're addicted to you.
You are?

Yes, we asked you to come with
Us to the dragonfly, didn't we?

We love you, michel,

And as long as you stay far,
Far away from little davey,

We will continue loving you.

Oh. I can do that.

Okay.

Okay...Hold on...And...

What do you think?

It stinks.

Well, it's a newspaper hat.

It's not supposed
To spark a trend.

There.

How'd you do that?
Martha stewart.

Martha stewart actually
Did a segment

On how to make a hat
Out of newspaper?

Yes.

Well, it looks nice.

Aah!
What is this?!

Academically approved torture?!

Make your own hat -- that's how
You get on the paper?

'cause that has what to do
With anything?

Relax, glenn.
It's tradition.

It's not tradition.
It's hazing.

Why don't they just handcuff us
Naked to a streetlamp

Wearing a sign that says,

"Honk if you like
Unbiased journalism"?

I'm not doing it.

You don't wear the hat,
You're not getting on the paper.

I need another sheet.

Ladies and gentlemen,

Tonight represents a melding
Of the old and the new.

For one night, identifying
The two groups will be easy.

The old will be the ones running
Around frantically

Trying to get out the latest
Issue of the daily news,

And the new will be
The ones in the stupid hats.

It's a much-beloved tradition
That for one night, all night,

You don a hat
Of your own making,

Wait on members of
The paper while observing

The inner working
Of the yale daily news.

There's a lot of new,
Fresh talent

Sitting in this room tonight --

Rory gilmore,

An unflinchingly honest reviewer
Who shows no mercy,

But a great deal of dark wit
In her pieces.

Paris geller, whose interview
With professor asher fleming

Was the most intimate
And revealing portrait

Of a complicated man
That I have ever read.

Glenn babble,

Whose cartoon commentaries
On the american family

Prove that he was never hugged
A day in his life.

It's hard work being here,
But it's an honor.

You're working with
The best of the best.

From here, you can go
To the new york times,

The washington post.

You can even sell out
Your ideals completely

Like the cofounders of
The daily news did

When they started
Time magazine,

Which has basically become
An overhyped, illustrated
Birdcage liner.

News for the "Reader's digest"
Bunch, I call it.

The "Just give us the gist of
It" magazine

Masquerading as
A real news outlet.

I mean, let's face it --

If it weren't for waiting rooms
All over the world,

There'd be absolutely no need
For time magazine...At all.

I hate time magazine!
Cheryl, I need tea!

You never told me what you
Thought of my article.

Um, what article?

My interview
With asher fleming.

Did you read it?
I skimmed it.

I have a copy
In our room.

I can give it
To you tomorrow.
I'm sure it's good.

But still,
I'd like you to read it.

I trust your opinion,
And I'd like to be able
To discuss it with you.

Look, we're supposed to be
Taking dinner orders, so...

Hello?
Hi.

No phone calls while you're
Wearing the hat!

Hold on.

I will be right back.
Where are you going?

You're not supposed to leave
While you're wearing the hat.

I will be right back.

It's a good thing high school

Had already beaten all
The self-esteem out of me.

Jason: how could you talk
Through an entire movie?

Well, nothing else
Was happening.

An entire movie
Was happening.

There were people in costumes
And horses.

I did see the horses.
I thought you liked horses.

I do like horses,
But they never let them talk.

That's because this wasn't
A talking-horse movie.

You want some wine?
Oh, I don't know.

You're vibing my movie-watching
Habits.

I am not vibing your habits.

I'm merely saying that
The large man in a wife beater

Sitting in front of us

Invited me into the lobby
To discuss your habits,

And had I accepted
His charming invitation,

I might be in traction
Right now.

You could totally
Have outrun him.

Thank you.

So, this is your place.

This is it.
Hmm. Interesting.

So, what's the verdict?

Well, you're not
A tchotchke guy.

I don't like too many
Objects around

That have no obvious purpose.

The purpose of tchotchkes
Is to make you happy.

They make you smile.

They make a room seem
Fun and whimsical.

I invite a clown over
Once a week

To make the room feel
Fun and whimsical,

So I feel all set
In that department.

I thought you said
You had a dog.
I do.

Where is he?
Over there.

Oh.

He's cute and very still.

Yeah, he's the best.

What is his name?
Cyrus.

Perfect name for a dog --
Cyrus.

Hi, cyrus.

Is he breathing?
Yes.

Cyrus was actually trained by
The monks of new skete.

He's incredibly well-behaved.
He was housebroken in an hour.

He has a two-bark minimum
For delivery guys,

Three for everybody else,
But the best thing about him

Is he doesn't do any
Of the standard "Sit and
Lie down" commands.

I taught him very
Special commands

That only my dog
Could know.

Like what?

Like...A little
To the left.

Shut up.

Cyrus,
A little to the left.

What the hell's
That good for?

Well, what the hell
Is "Sit" good for?

When you sit,
You get a cookie.

Well, when you move
A little to the left,

You get the satisfaction of
Knowing you are doing something,

But you are not
Pandering for a dog bone.

Can he move a little
To the right?
No, not yet.

We just do a little to the left
Until he hits the wall,

And then I turn him around.

You and your dog
Are extremely weird.
Thank you.

Thank you.

I'm not sure we're setting
Such a good example

For cyrus over there.

Oh, you might be right.

Cyrus...

Okay.

Well, that one, I get.

Every week,
You argue with me.

Doyle, it's a perfectly
Good article.

We don't do "Perfectly good"
Here.

You want to do "Perfectly good,"
Go to harvard.

Jackass.

Can you beat him to death
With that?

I don't think so.
It's soft serve.

I got your ice cream.

What is this?

Strawberry ice cream.

It has strawberries in it.

I don't even know how
To respond to that.

I wanted plain strawberry
Ice cream

Without chunks
Of strawberries in it.

This has chunks.
I see one.

I can't eat this.

Would you like me to get you
Something else?

No, just forget it.

Fine. Bring it back.

Are you okay, doyle?

Yes. Why wouldn't I be?

You just seem a little bit
Annoyed tonight.

I have an issue to put out with
A big hole on the back page,

Because my editorial writers
Chose to be unopinionated today!

And that's it?

And I got rejected for a job
As yale's stringer

To time magazine.

Oh, so, that explains it.

This is a major blow
To my career.

You're 20.

One day you're feeling good,
You're the fair-haired boy,

And the next day
You're schleprock.

You're not schleprock.
Tell that to my dad.

Okay, I just have to say how
Amazingly unfair it is

That I have a rubber band
Working its way into my brain,

And paris gets to bail.

Paris isn't here?
No, she isn't.

You didn't know she left?

I knew that there was this thing
With her family

That she was really
Concerned about.

She got that call,
And her aunt is sick,

And I heard her say something
About going to the hospital,

So I think that's
Where she went.

All right, well, come get me
The minute she gets back.

I will.

Lorelai: hey, do you have
A cosmo lying around?

I want to see how many calories
I just burned off.

It's 55.

Oh, no,
It's way more than 55.

I know what 55 is, and that,
My friend, is not 55.

Thanks.

Are you cold?
I could turn up the heat.

Oh, please,
Enough with the bragging.

[ chuckles ]
So, you're good?

I'm good.
[ sighs ]

I'm gonna fall asleep
Extremely happy tonight.

Hi.
Hi back.

Are you thinking about joining
Me back here anytime soon?

Joining you? Well...

Jason?

Okay, just remember, you like
That I have little quirks.

Okay.

They're what make me me.

You're not gonna ask to wear
My dress, are you?

[ chuckles ] No.

I was just wondering
If you wouldn't mind

Sleeping in
The guest room tonight.

Well...Didn't see
That one coming.

I am the world's
Lightest sleeper.

I have chronic insomnia,

So I toss and I turn
Like a crazy person,

And I can't sleep in the same
Bed with another person.

You're serious?
Yeah.

You want me to go
In the guest room?

It's a really nice room.

You know,
Why don't I just go?

Oh, no, no, please, I swear,
I want you to stay.

I want to see you
In the morning.

I want you to be here
When I get up.

Well, not here. In there.

Jason, you don't have to go
To all this trouble

Just to get me to leave.

I don't want you to leave.

I can handle the truth.

This is the truth.

I have things I need to do
Tomorrow.

I should probably go home
Anyhow.

Please,
Just look at the room.

Just one look.
A peek.

You don't even have to use
Both eyes if you don't want to.

[ sighs ]

One look.

That's all I ask.

Well, that and you get out
Of the bed very slowly.

Don't flirt with me.
I'm finding you weird right now.

Here you go.

Here it is.

It's okay.

There are hundreds of great
Books in here,

Ranging from the classics --
"Wuthering heights" --

To the real classics --
"Valley of the dolls."

Nice taste.

Fully loaded minibar, soda,
Candy, little bottles of hooch,

A really great cd player,
Cds down below,

And a dvd library above.

Dvds but no tv?
Aha.

Oh, come on,
That is cool.

Okay, fine, it's cool.
The room is good.

It's better than "Good."
I would love this room.

You do know you can
Have it, don't you?

I can't have any
Distractions in my room,

Or I won't sleep.

Really?
That's right.

Tv, reading material,
Unbelievably gorgeous woman.

I should at least get billing
Over the tv.

It's plasma.
Oh, right.

So, what do you think?
Well...

There's kiehl's products
In the bathroom.

Jason, I promise, if I leave,
It won't be that big a deal.

It'll be a very
Big deal to me.

Please. Stay.

Okay.
Yes?

Yes. Freak.

Thank you.

Even for the "Freak,"
Thank you.

There's a loofah
In the top drawer.

Jason: good night.

Good night.

[ giggles ]

[ footsteps approaching ]

Whew. It's late.
[ chuckles ]

Late, late, late, late, late,
Late, late.

Don't you wanna know
Where I was?

No, I don't.

I completely
Lost track of time.

I should remember to take
A watch with me from now on.

Man, when I got
That call tonight,

I had no idea it was
Gonna go this late.

Yes, it was quite a night.

Tonight.

You're sure you don't wanna
Know where I was?

No, I don't wanna know
Where you were,

And I don't wanna know
What you were doing

Or who you were
Doing it with.

I had to cover for you when
Doyle noticed you were gone,

So I told him you were
At a family thing.

And as far as I'm concerned,
That's where you were --

At your family thing.

And in the future,
I want nothing to do

With anything to do with what
You were doing tonight

Or who you were doing it with,
Especially who.

Now, go to sleep.

I smell like pipe tobacco.

Oh, jeez.

[ footsteps descending stairs ]

Hi, cyrus.

Oh, good.

Listen, would you still find me
Attractive if I were poor?

Um, no.

Aw, that's what I figured.
Sleep good?

I watched "The daily show,"

Fell into the best sleep
I've ever had,

Woke up, watched "Fast times
At ridgemont high,"

And had a vanilla-scented
Jacuzzi bath.

Oh, so, that's what the look
On your face is.

I thought it was from sex
With me.

No, it's from
The jacuzzi bath.

Good morning.
Good morning.

Coffee's over here.
Thank you.

Coffee smells good.

Hey, can we not sleep together
Again tonight?

Absolutely.

You want cheese
In your eggs?
Why not?

Mmm, good.

I think we're ready to go.

Wow, look what you've
Done here.

Well, I am trying
To impress you.

Trust me, once you're completely
Mad about me,

It is back to corn flakes
And beer.

This is lovely.

You are lovely.

Very good.

Tomorrow I'll make blintzes.

Um, listen, we should talk about
What we're gonna do.

About what?

I mean, you know,

What we're gonna, uh,
Say to people about us.

How about "Yahoo"?

I'm talking about
What we're gonna say
To my parents about us.

I thought we'd say
That we're having

Repeated sexual encounters
Out of wedlock, continuously,

As catholic schoolchildren
Are walking by.

No, you know, we like each
Other, we're dating --

Pretty simple.

Nothing is simple
When it comes to my parents.

What do you want to say?

I'd like to say nothing.
Nothing?

It isn't really any of their
Business anyhow, is it?

No, but we can't just say
Nothing.

It'll cause too many problems
If they know.

In my experience, these things
Have a way of coming out.

How?
I don't know.
Somebody slips up.

I'm non-slip, like one of those
Rubber mats you stick in
The bottom of the tub.

Why can't we tell your parents
About this?

I just think it's weird.

You're in business with my
Father, and he won't like this.

My father has never gotten
Used to anything.

He still misses diesel fuel.

You don't find it exhausting,
Keeping secrets?

You have to watch
Everything you say.

I always have to watch
Everything I say around
My parents anyway.

How about we just tell one of
Them, just to see how that goes?

Jason, we will tell them
Eventually, I promise.

Just not now.

Okay, they're your parents,

And if you feel that strongly,
Then we'll wait.

Thank you.

Hey, can I feed this
To cyrus?

Hey, cyrus,
You want the bacon?

That is one strange dog,
Jason.

Excuse me, you know how much
Longer it's going on?

No. Uh...

Well, hello.
Are we too late?

No, of course not.

May I have your ticket?
I don't have a ticket.

You can't take the tour
Without a ticket.

Excuse me, dorrie,
This is my daughter.

Oh! Well, hello there.

Hi.
Come in, lorelai.

Bye.

Mom, what is going on?

We let the historical
Society use our house
For a walking tour.

It's for a good cause,
And I am never doing it again.

It was supposed to end
At 5:00, emily.

What do you want me to do,
Throw them out?

This is not
How it's done.

This is not how
Proper charities work.

You do not infringe
On people's lives.

You make a plan
And stick to it.

They hired actors
To be the family.

We are not actors!

Richard, please.

Dorrie: this is not
Part of the tour.
Sorry, emily.

That's quite all right,
Dorrie.

It is not all right, dorrie.

Richard, just ignore it
And pass the carrots.

This is lunacy.
I feel as if I was in a zoo.

Dad, you know what monkeys do

When they don't like people
Staring at them in the zoo?

No, I don't.
And you don't want to.

How do you know?
I can just tell.

Don't play that piano!
Don't you see the sign?

There was supposed
To be a sign.
There is a sign.

Well, it's not
A very good sign.

Dorrie: the house was built
In 1906 by stanford white.

That's it.

The house was built
In 1907,

And he was a protégé
Of stanford white.

I'm getting a migraine.

So, you're a full-fledged
Newspaperwoman now.
Yes, I am.

Congratulations.
Thank you.

Now you got to get yourself
A nickname like smitty

And start talking
Really fast.

Faster than I already do?
Whatever it takes.

Emily: what where you going
To do, hit the man?

He went into my desk!
He was 85 years old!

It's never too late
To learn a lesson.

This is it, emily.
I mean it.

I know you do, richard.

The next time you plan
A function,

We will rent a hall
And do it properly,

Like the fibromyalgia function
Last night.

That is the proper way
To raise money.

You went to a function
Last night...

We didn't host the one
Last night.

We were just guests.
It was fine.

It wasn't here.
It was perfect.

The food was terrible.

The fact that people still
Insist on serving paella

Is simply beyond me.

However,
The room looked lovely.

And the music was excellent.

And the guest list
Was very good --

A lovely group of people,
Except for --
Emily!

Would it have hurt the woman
To buy an undergarment?

[ gasps ] Who?

She was a very nice girl.

I wouldn't request to see her
Thesis on anything,

But she was charming
And a good dancer.

Who's the dumb girl
Without the underwear?

Jason's date.

Jason brought a date?

And I had to sit next to her
All night.

Oh, the fascinating time
We had.

I know all the best places
To get my acrylics filled.

Your mother is a snob.
She was quite beautiful.

She was, huh?

She's perfect for jason.

So, how beautiful was she?

Are we talking
Catherine zeta-jones

Or the weird-looking
Hilton sister?

She looks like exactly
The kind of gold digger

Who would latch onto an immature
Little con artist like jason.

My goodness, emily, tell us how
You really feel about the boy.

But when you say
"Gold digger,"

Do you mean she was
Cheap-looking?

Yes.
No.

Is he serious
About this girl?
Who can tell?

She looks like a perfectly fine
First wife for him.

Now the old man
Is just baiting me.

We don't have to put
The reception area over there.

I just want to know where my
Office is going to be.

Fonzie used the bathroom
As his office.

What are you saying, that what's
Good enough for the fonz

Isn't good enough for you?

Fonzie used that bathroom office
Only intermittently

And not for any business
For which he was paid.

He had use of a private office
At the auto shop he worked at,

Then access
To the teachers' lounge

Where he taught night school
Part time.

You're taking this fonzie thing
Way too seriously.

Hey. What are you
Doing here?

I was on my way to new york,

And I wanted to see this inn
You're always talking about.

Oh, well, uh, sure.

Hello, I'm sookie.

Sookie is my partner here.

Hi, sookie,
I'm jason stiles.

Yes, you are.

Michel gerard.

Michel is the manager
Of the dragonfly.

It's nice to meet you.

I'm just gonna show
Jason around.

Follow me.

Your friends seem
Really nice.

Oh, they're the best.

So, who do they think
I am?

What do you mean?

Did you tell them we're
Dating, or do they think
I make your hats?

They know who you are.
This place
Is really great.

You think?
I do.

That's good.

You seem
A little distracted.

Did I come at a bad time?

No, you came
At a perfect time.

I heard you went
To a function last night.

Ah, fibromyalgia --
A very dull disease.

I also heard
You didn't go alone.
No, I didn't.

So, you brought a date?

Yes, I did.

Okay, good.
Well, I'm glad.

My mother said she didn't
Wear any underwear.

Emily didn't wear
Any underwear?

Your date didn't wear
Any underwear.

I don't know that for a fact,
But if emily said so,

Far be it for me
To call her a liar.

Uh, okay, hey,
You wanna see the stables?

Well, there they are.
Well, tour's over.

Bathroom's to the left.

You wanna tell me what you're
Bothered about?

We're sleeping together,

And you're taking bare-butted
Women to functions?

Crystal is just a friend --

A friend named crystal?

Who are you?
Hugh hefner?

Whoa, wait a sec.

I would have much rather taken
You to that function.

Crystal is very sweet,
But the mocking of the sick

Is completely beyond
Her capabilities.

You told me
That your parents

Were not supposed
To know about us.

And since this is a function
Your parents would be attending,

I thought taking you would be
Out of the question.

You could have gone alone.

There are two seats, and you're
Expected to fill them.

You could have told me so I
Wasn't blindsided by my parents.

This is what I mean about
Keeping secrets.

It never works.
Let's just tell your parents.

Then we never have to have
This conversation again.

I am in a business where there
Are lots of functions.

I have to go
To those functions,

And I don't want
To take other people,

But I'm going to have to

If you won't let me say
Something to your father.

I have no interest in spending
A second of my time

With any other woman but you,
And eartha kitt.

Well, sure.

So, what do you say?

Can we end the madness
And tell your parents?

No.
No?

I know it's tricky
To keep this a secret,

But I just don't think
It's time to tell them yet.

If that means I have to adjust,
Then I have to adjust.

Now that you've told me
How you feel,

I think it's fine if you take
Crystal to these functions.

Fine for you -- you don't have
To talk to the woman.

Maybe you don't understand.

It's like beating your head
Against a wall with spikes.

Wanna see
The apple trees?

She thinks that babe
Can really talk.

Contemporary
Political fiction?

Yes.

I swore this semester
Would be different.

I would get
To class on time.

I would finish
My assignments on time.

I would do everything
On time.

I left my purse
On the bench.

Ugh!

I haven't started
Speaking yet.

[ laughter ]

Asher fleming
Is teaching this course?

I know.
Isn't it cool?

Ah, well...

Rory gilmore.

We meet again.

Hello,
Professor fleming.

You're taking this class?
Yes, I am.

Wonderful.
I look forward to it.

After all, it seems very
Natural, doesn't it?

Especially since you and I

Have someone very important
In common --

Your grandfather.

[ chuckles ]

Good man.
Yes, sir, very good.

All right, well,
Let's get settled.

The class is contemporary
Political fiction.

I am professor fleming.

All those in the wrong class,
Please leave.

How do you know you're in
The wrong class?

If you do not enjoy
A good argument,

If you find it difficult
To voice a differing opinion,

And if you cannot appreciate
An intelligently cloaked insult,

Then you're in the wrong class.

If all of these things appeal
To you,

Then you are in for
An interesting semester.

I'll be handing out
The reading lists.

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