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1
00:00:20,095 --> 00:00:22,003
Okay, off to school.
2
00:00:22,023 --> 00:00:23,838
Again. It's like every
day with that place.
3
00:00:23,858 --> 00:00:26,391
At least part of the day will
be taken up with that assembly.
4
00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:29,344
Right. Assemblies are...
always so not boring.
5
00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:31,012
- I love assembling.
- What assembly?
6
00:00:31,106 --> 00:00:33,014
It's called the "College
Is Cool" assembly.
7
00:00:33,034 --> 00:00:35,425
I-I guess they want us
to think college is cool.
8
00:00:35,444 --> 00:00:37,536
Well, then they should
have called it "Coolidge."
9
00:00:37,687 --> 00:00:38,929
College? Already?
10
00:00:39,022 --> 00:00:40,781
But you're too young
to think about that.
11
00:00:40,933 --> 00:00:42,185
I think college
sounds kind of fun.
12
00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:43,600
You get to live in a dorm.
13
00:00:43,693 --> 00:00:45,580
I've always wanted to
wear flip-flops in the shower.
14
00:00:45,604 --> 00:00:46,861
You don't need
to go off to college.
15
00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:49,122
Stay home with us.
Wear flip-flops here.
16
00:00:49,275 --> 00:00:50,532
Our tub is disgusting.
17
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:52,609
Lin, relax. They're
not going today.
18
00:00:52,628 --> 00:00:54,035
It's still a ways off.
19
00:00:54,129 --> 00:00:56,113
Yeah, right. What,
like ten years?
20
00:00:56,206 --> 00:00:57,206
- Four years.
- God.
21
00:00:57,299 --> 00:00:58,465
Well, we better head out.
22
00:00:58,617 --> 00:01:00,262
Yeah, don't want
to miss a minute. Bye.
23
00:01:00,286 --> 00:01:02,097
- Bye, Mom. -GENE: Bye, Mama.
- No, kids, don't go!
24
00:01:02,121 --> 00:01:03,562
God. God.
25
00:01:04,139 --> 00:01:05,898
My babies!
26
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,734
Lin. Breathe.
27
00:01:08,885 --> 00:01:10,402
Easy.
28
00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:12,738
Linda? You okay?
29
00:01:12,965 --> 00:01:14,631
You've been making
that sound a lot.
30
00:01:14,724 --> 00:01:15,724
Yeah, Teddy.
31
00:01:15,818 --> 00:01:17,634
I'm just thinking
about how our children
32
00:01:17,653 --> 00:01:20,061
are gonna leave us one day,
and then we'll be all alone.
33
00:01:20,155 --> 00:01:21,747
With each other?
34
00:01:21,824 --> 00:01:22,824
I guess.
35
00:01:22,917 --> 00:01:24,061
Yeah, you'll-you'll
still have me.
36
00:01:24,085 --> 00:01:25,809
- And me.
- Well, more me.
37
00:01:25,828 --> 00:01:26,660
Yeah, probably more you.
38
00:01:26,754 --> 00:01:28,145
I better get going.
39
00:01:28,163 --> 00:01:29,588
Two funerals this weekend.
40
00:01:29,665 --> 00:01:30,981
Was it a murder-suicide?
41
00:01:31,150 --> 00:01:32,407
- Geez. -Teddy.
- Sorry, sorry.
42
00:01:32,484 --> 00:01:33,764
My mom got me
hooked on Dateline.
43
00:01:33,794 --> 00:01:35,986
Good show. You get to
see a lot of the country.
44
00:01:36,079 --> 00:01:37,079
Um... bye?
45
00:01:37,172 --> 00:01:38,430
Bye! Enjoy your funerals.
46
00:01:38,582 --> 00:01:40,462
- -Hi.
- My car broke down.
47
00:01:40,509 --> 00:01:42,676
Can I use your phone
to call a tow truck?
48
00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,494
No. Course you can, hon.
49
00:01:44,663 --> 00:01:46,163
I'll get you the number
of the tow guy we like.
50
00:01:46,181 --> 00:01:48,332
- Head Shoulders Knees and Tows.
- Thank you so much.
51
00:01:48,350 --> 00:01:50,350
My son gave me a fancy phone,
52
00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:52,018
but I never
remember to charge it.
53
00:01:52,171 --> 00:01:54,504
I'm like that with toilets. I
never remember to flush 'em.
54
00:01:54,673 --> 00:01:56,115
Yeah, technology, right?
55
00:01:56,266 --> 00:01:58,433
Hi, I'm at Bob's
Burgers on, um...
56
00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:00,360
- On Ocean Avenue.
- On Ocean Avenue.
57
00:02:00,512 --> 00:02:03,013
On Ocean Avenue,
and I need a tow truck.
58
00:02:03,031 --> 00:02:04,531
Yes, my name is Bea Cromwell.
59
00:02:04,608 --> 00:02:06,850
- Your name sounds familiar.
- Really?
60
00:02:06,852 --> 00:02:09,353
Maybe it's just 'cause
it reminds me of bees.
61
00:02:09,446 --> 00:02:10,607
I'm
leaving. Bye, Bob.
62
00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:12,109
- Bye, Linda.
- Yeah, it's a gray Toyota.
63
00:02:12,133 --> 00:02:13,173
- Bye, Teddy.
- Bye, Teddy.
64
00:02:13,283 --> 00:02:14,358
Don't do a murder-suicide.
65
00:02:14,376 --> 00:02:15,542
- We won't.
- Probably won't.
66
00:02:15,694 --> 00:02:17,027
Okay. Thank you. Bye.
67
00:02:17,045 --> 00:02:18,545
- Are they coming?
- Yes.
68
00:02:18,697 --> 00:02:20,951
They said they're busy today,
so it'll be around 45 minutes.
69
00:02:20,975 --> 00:02:22,141
Is it okay if I wait here?
70
00:02:22,368 --> 00:02:24,125
- Sure. Coffee?
- Okay. Thanks.
71
00:02:24,219 --> 00:02:25,793
- So, you live nearby?
- Um...
72
00:02:25,888 --> 00:02:27,663
- No, Connecticut.
- Ooh, Connecticut.
73
00:02:27,665 --> 00:02:29,873
Did you know it's
spelled "Connect-icut"?
74
00:02:29,966 --> 00:02:31,299
- Weird?
- Yup.
75
00:02:31,318 --> 00:02:32,634
What is that? You
print out a whole book?
76
00:02:32,653 --> 00:02:34,895
Yeah, in-in a
way, it's a manuscript.
77
00:02:35,047 --> 00:02:36,380
Ooh, you're a writer?
78
00:02:36,398 --> 00:02:37,958
Were you sick of
writing in Connecticut?
79
00:02:38,050 --> 00:02:39,065
Too much nice foliage?
80
00:02:39,218 --> 00:02:40,734
Sometimes stuff's just too nice.
81
00:02:40,886 --> 00:02:42,530
No, I'm in town for a
reading of one of my books.
82
00:02:42,554 --> 00:02:45,055
What do you write?
Maybe I've read your stuff.
83
00:02:45,224 --> 00:02:46,544
You write any of
those audiobooks?
84
00:02:46,650 --> 00:02:49,817
I've written, in a few
different genres, actually.
85
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:51,728
Kids' books, adult fiction...
86
00:02:51,747 --> 00:02:55,232
You're Bea Cromwell! I
know how I know your name!
87
00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:56,900
You wrote Snail and Newt.
88
00:02:56,993 --> 00:02:58,752
My God...!
89
00:02:58,904 --> 00:03:01,738
Yeah, well, that was many,
many years ago, yes, yes.
90
00:03:01,757 --> 00:03:03,740
Bob, this is Bea Cromwell.
91
00:03:03,833 --> 00:03:05,166
She wrote all the
Snail and Newts.
92
00:03:05,260 --> 00:03:07,186
Yes, I-I heard you screaming.
93
00:03:07,337 --> 00:03:09,671
Our family has
really enjoyed your books.
94
00:03:09,765 --> 00:03:12,098
Aw, we must have read
Snail and Newt to our kids
95
00:03:12,251 --> 00:03:13,767
100 times when they were little.
96
00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:16,028
"Snail and Newt gaze at
the sweet strawberry tart.
97
00:03:16,179 --> 00:03:17,529
"'You don't think they'll be mad
98
00:03:17,756 --> 00:03:19,531
"if we take a
nibble, right, Snail?'
99
00:03:19,683 --> 00:03:20,723
"'I don't think so, Newt.
100
00:03:20,776 --> 00:03:22,034
"'What if they left it for us?
101
00:03:22,261 --> 00:03:23,905
"Then it would be
rude for us not to eat it, '
102
00:03:23,929 --> 00:03:24,761
"replied Snail.
103
00:03:24,763 --> 00:03:25,946
"'I hate being rude.
104
00:03:26,098 --> 00:03:27,447
"We'd better eat
the whole thing.'
105
00:03:27,599 --> 00:03:29,244
Snail and Newt begin
to devour the tart..."
106
00:03:29,268 --> 00:03:31,192
"Finally, there it was,
the mysterious treasure
107
00:03:31,286 --> 00:03:33,770
"they had hiked, biked
and climbed to find.
108
00:03:33,863 --> 00:03:35,380
"'We're rich, ' said Newt.
109
00:03:35,532 --> 00:03:37,607
"'I do hope we don't get
hoity-toity, ' said Snail.
110
00:03:37,626 --> 00:03:40,610
"'Yes.
Hoity or toity,
111
00:03:40,629 --> 00:03:42,446
but not both, ' said Newt."
112
00:03:45,709 --> 00:03:47,208
- Dad, wake up!
- Dad, Dad. -Keep reading.
113
00:03:47,228 --> 00:03:48,560
Sorry, sorry. I'm awake.
114
00:03:48,787 --> 00:03:50,729
"The pond was quiet.
The loudest sound was
115
00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:52,397
"the crickets in the long grass.
116
00:03:52,549 --> 00:03:55,216
"Snail held Newt's hand
as the changes gripped him
117
00:03:55,236 --> 00:03:58,144
"and he became a true
creature of the under-pond.
118
00:03:58,313 --> 00:03:59,980
"'Newt.
119
00:04:00,132 --> 00:04:02,983
"'Newt, I would give
anything to go with you.
120
00:04:03,135 --> 00:04:04,576
If only I could...'"
121
00:04:04,728 --> 00:04:06,303
I'm sorry, Bob. You take it.
122
00:04:06,321 --> 00:04:07,654
"'If only I could.'
123
00:04:07,806 --> 00:04:09,566
"And when Newt couldn't
stay in the open air
124
00:04:09,658 --> 00:04:11,975
"for another moment,
he let go of Snail
125
00:04:12,068 --> 00:04:14,494
"and slipped under
the surface of the pond.
126
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:16,496
'Goodbye, Newt.'"
127
00:04:16,573 --> 00:04:17,647
God, it got me, too.
128
00:04:17,741 --> 00:04:18,999
Those are the best books
129
00:04:19,151 --> 00:04:20,462
about snails and
newts ever written.
130
00:04:20,486 --> 00:04:21,926
So, is that what
your reading is for?
131
00:04:22,004 --> 00:04:23,644
- Did you write another one?
- No.
132
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:25,413
I-I loved writing those books,
133
00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:27,991
but I wrote them years
ago when my kids were little.
134
00:04:28,084 --> 00:04:30,385
I-I write dramatic
thrillers now for adults.
135
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:32,604
Books for adults? I
guess that's a thing.
136
00:04:32,756 --> 00:04:33,772
Yes. Yes, it is.
137
00:04:33,999 --> 00:04:35,832
My new book is about
a middle-aged librarian
138
00:04:35,851 --> 00:04:38,460
who learns mixed martial
arts to infiltrate the mob
139
00:04:38,462 --> 00:04:40,261
and break up a rare
books crime ring.
140
00:04:40,355 --> 00:04:41,688
Yeah, that book sounds good.
141
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:44,007
I didn't really listen to
what you said it was about,
142
00:04:44,026 --> 00:04:45,342
but, Bea,
143
00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:47,101
the Snail and Newt
books were magical.
144
00:04:47,195 --> 00:04:49,491
- Thanks. I don't...
- And if you can make that kind of magic,
145
00:04:49,515 --> 00:04:50,831
why would you ever stop?
146
00:04:50,940 --> 00:04:53,292
You think David Copperfield
would say, "No more magic"
147
00:04:53,443 --> 00:04:55,368
and never pull out another
dove from his blouse?
148
00:04:55,445 --> 00:04:57,037
You're very sweet,
Linda, sort of,
149
00:04:57,131 --> 00:04:59,539
but I'm not writing another
Snail and Newt book.
150
00:04:59,691 --> 00:05:01,449
But maybe? Maybe?
151
00:05:01,543 --> 00:05:03,302
Am I seeing a nod?
Was that a nod?
152
00:05:03,529 --> 00:05:05,137
Lin, you're the
one who's nodding.
153
00:05:05,364 --> 00:05:08,307
Yeah, okay. All right, okay.
154
00:05:08,534 --> 00:05:10,216
Pizza day, a-pizza day.
155
00:05:10,369 --> 00:05:11,769
I've been chanting
this all morning,
156
00:05:11,870 --> 00:05:14,871
and the teachers love
it 'cause it's pizza day.
157
00:05:14,964 --> 00:05:16,540
Crap.
158
00:05:16,633 --> 00:05:17,799
Look at Mr. Frond.
159
00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:19,651
Okay. So far I hate this game.
160
00:05:19,803 --> 00:05:21,545
Yeah, I sort of wish
there was more to it.
161
00:05:21,563 --> 00:05:23,679
What has he got there?
Why is he acting so squirmy?
162
00:05:23,681 --> 00:05:25,715
- Let's go make him squirmier.
- But it's pizza day!
163
00:05:25,734 --> 00:05:27,551
It's in the Constitution.
164
00:05:27,569 --> 00:05:28,569
Okay, fine.
165
00:05:28,645 --> 00:05:30,220
Mr. Frond?
166
00:05:30,238 --> 00:05:31,979
What you got behind
your back there?
167
00:05:32,074 --> 00:05:33,481
Nothing.
168
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:34,833
Is that cat food?
169
00:05:35,060 --> 00:05:36,168
Yes. That's my lunch.
170
00:05:36,319 --> 00:05:37,561
Adults eat different things.
171
00:05:37,579 --> 00:05:39,487
So we've got that
to look forward to.
172
00:05:40,916 --> 00:05:42,248
Cat food and a cat toy?
173
00:05:42,401 --> 00:05:43,658
You're really into the culture.
174
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:45,827
- Yep.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, Mr. Frond.
175
00:05:45,921 --> 00:05:47,328
- What's going on here?
- Nothing!
176
00:05:47,422 --> 00:05:49,514
Okay, then I guess
we'll just follow you
177
00:05:49,666 --> 00:05:51,408
and watch you during
your eat and play time.
178
00:05:51,501 --> 00:05:52,904
All right, all right, listen.
179
00:05:52,928 --> 00:05:54,768
My cat is stuck in the
tree in front of school,
180
00:05:54,913 --> 00:05:57,522
and I'm trying to lure him
down before anyone finds out.
181
00:05:57,749 --> 00:06:00,100
Why is your cat stuck
in a tree at school?
182
00:06:00,252 --> 00:06:01,768
- I
- had to bring him.
183
00:06:01,845 --> 00:06:03,489
Dr. Bojangles has one
more day of his allergy meds,
184
00:06:03,513 --> 00:06:05,346
and he needs it
every three hours.
185
00:06:05,440 --> 00:06:07,699
I tried to sneak him into
work with me, but he got out.
186
00:06:07,926 --> 00:06:09,534
He's very athletic.
187
00:06:09,686 --> 00:06:11,046
I don't know where
he gets it from,
188
00:06:11,096 --> 00:06:12,376
but it's definitely not from me.
189
00:06:12,598 --> 00:06:13,999
Anyway, he climbed up
the tree in front of the school,
190
00:06:14,023 --> 00:06:15,448
and now he's stuck up there.
191
00:06:15,601 --> 00:06:17,670
And if Principal Spoors finds
out I brought Dr. Bojangles
192
00:06:17,694 --> 00:06:19,861
to school again, I'll
be in so much trouble.
193
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,122
He's weird about
bringing cats to school.
194
00:06:22,198 --> 00:06:23,607
I have to get him
down during lunch
195
00:06:23,700 --> 00:06:25,753
because I'm supposed to
be "available for counseling"
196
00:06:25,777 --> 00:06:27,386
fourth period, and
then it's the assembly
197
00:06:27,554 --> 00:06:29,295
and I have to introduce
the college people.
198
00:06:29,390 --> 00:06:31,056
And they want me to
say, "Make some noise
199
00:06:31,207 --> 00:06:32,373
for continuing education,"
200
00:06:32,467 --> 00:06:34,059
and I just don't
think I can pull off
201
00:06:34,210 --> 00:06:35,780
- the phrase "make some noise."
- No, you can't.
202
00:06:35,804 --> 00:06:37,599
So you're just gonna go
to the front of the school
203
00:06:37,623 --> 00:06:39,547
where everyone in
the school can see you
204
00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:41,307
'cause of this thing
called windows,
205
00:06:41,460 --> 00:06:43,143
and you're gonna be
holding some cat food
206
00:06:43,295 --> 00:06:44,403
and jiggling a cat toy?
207
00:06:44,554 --> 00:06:46,463
And jiggling your
moneymaker, probably.
208
00:06:46,481 --> 00:06:47,792
You need a cover
story. Like, for instance,
209
00:06:47,816 --> 00:06:50,984
a guidance counselor
and a few students outside,
210
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:54,079
doing something that is totally
normal and not cat-related.
211
00:06:54,306 --> 00:06:56,915
- Interesting.
- And maybe all these kind students
212
00:06:57,066 --> 00:06:58,992
receive in return for helping is
213
00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:01,402
a couple of "get out of
detention free" cards?
214
00:07:01,422 --> 00:07:03,480
What the heck is a "get
out of detention free" card?
215
00:07:03,573 --> 00:07:05,165
To get us out of
future detentions.
216
00:07:05,317 --> 00:07:07,462
Doesn't it sound like something
that should already exist?
217
00:07:07,486 --> 00:07:08,760
No, I-I can't bribe kids
218
00:07:08,837 --> 00:07:11,488
with "get out of detention
free" cards. They're not real.
219
00:07:11,581 --> 00:07:13,317
Plus, it would be
unethical. Okay, it's a deal.
220
00:07:13,341 --> 00:07:14,824
- Yes!
- Let me at that thing!
221
00:07:16,495 --> 00:07:18,495
Bob, look
what I got from upstairs.
222
00:07:18,588 --> 00:07:20,772
- Snail and Newt.
- Wait, you went up to the apartment?
223
00:07:20,999 --> 00:07:23,257
So nobody was watching
the front of the house.
224
00:07:23,351 --> 00:07:24,834
I'm gonna remind her
225
00:07:24,853 --> 00:07:27,520
how special these books
are so she'll write another one.
226
00:07:27,673 --> 00:07:29,339
Or you could just
stop pressuring her
227
00:07:29,432 --> 00:07:30,932
and let her do what
she wants to do?
228
00:07:31,026 --> 00:07:32,509
Well, in my plan
I'm helping children
229
00:07:32,527 --> 00:07:34,511
and bringing families
together, and in your plan...
230
00:07:34,529 --> 00:07:36,346
Well, your plan sucks, no offense.
231
00:07:36,364 --> 00:07:38,457
Hey, Bea, look what I got.
232
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:40,517
Snail and Newt.
Yeah, there it is.
233
00:07:40,535 --> 00:07:42,961
- Yeah, look at it. You wrote this.
- Yes.
234
00:07:43,112 --> 00:07:45,188
Hey, Bea, it's
me Newt. Remember me?
235
00:07:46,449 --> 00:07:47,966
I'm Snail, I've got
236
00:07:48,117 --> 00:07:48,692
- a little hat on my head.
- Bob's Burgers.
237
00:07:48,710 --> 00:07:49,710
I just, um...
238
00:07:49,861 --> 00:07:51,470
Actually, I need to
use the restroom.
239
00:07:51,697 --> 00:07:53,432
Would you keep an
eye out for the tow truck?
240
00:07:53,456 --> 00:07:54,881
Sure thing, my
little Bea Author.
241
00:07:55,033 --> 00:07:57,291
- Get it? She does.
- Okay, thanks.
242
00:07:57,385 --> 00:07:58,846
That was the tow truck.
243
00:07:58,870 --> 00:08:00,312
They're pulling up now, I think.
244
00:08:00,463 --> 00:08:02,481
Already? No, no, no, no, no, no!
245
00:08:02,557 --> 00:08:05,391
Hi. I know
this is a little weird,
246
00:08:05,544 --> 00:08:07,877
but could you come back in
a few minutes or half an hour?
247
00:08:07,971 --> 00:08:10,137
No, that's not how this works.
248
00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:12,473
No, I know, but it's
important. You understand.
249
00:08:12,493 --> 00:08:14,475
- Just come back in a bit.
- No...
250
00:08:14,495 --> 00:08:16,995
Listen, what if I told you
Bea Cromwell isn't gonna write
251
00:08:17,146 --> 00:08:19,664
any more Snail and Newt books
unless we change her mind?
252
00:08:19,891 --> 00:08:21,333
Yeah... I'm gonna drive away.
253
00:08:21,484 --> 00:08:22,704
- But you're coming back?
- Nope.
254
00:08:22,728 --> 00:08:25,078
No, wait! You left.
255
00:08:25,172 --> 00:08:26,541
Boy. Okay.
256
00:08:26,565 --> 00:08:28,398
Did you just do
what I think you did?
257
00:08:29,584 --> 00:08:31,136
- Still no tow truck?
- Not yet.
258
00:08:32,904 --> 00:08:35,055
- More like a slow truck, right?
- My God.
259
00:08:38,927 --> 00:08:40,744
Lin, you sent Bea
Cromwell's tow truck away.
260
00:08:40,762 --> 00:08:42,503
Are we holding her hostage
now? I mean, are you?
261
00:08:42,523 --> 00:08:44,338
I'm gonna tell the
police it was all you.
262
00:08:44,432 --> 00:08:45,749
- I just work here.
- I didn't mean to.
263
00:08:45,767 --> 00:08:47,607
I mean, I did, but
different. It just happened.
264
00:08:47,677 --> 00:08:49,753
We need to
get Bea's tow truck back here.
265
00:08:49,771 --> 00:08:51,530
Okay, yes, let's call them.
266
00:08:51,681 --> 00:08:52,939
- Or...
- Or what?
267
00:08:53,108 --> 00:08:54,348
- We call them in a little bit.
- What? No.
268
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:55,867
This is already happening, Bob.
269
00:08:56,094 --> 00:08:58,203
And I was making
progress, pre-progress.
270
00:08:58,430 --> 00:08:59,871
I just need a little more time.
271
00:09:00,098 --> 00:09:02,115
- I don't like it.
- It's fine.
272
00:09:02,191 --> 00:09:04,543
Bea? You want to have
a burger while you wait?
273
00:09:04,694 --> 00:09:07,045
You know, the tow truck really
should be here any second.
274
00:09:07,272 --> 00:09:08,696
I'd, um, I'd hate for
you to make a burger
275
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:11,532
- and I can't stay to eat it.
- Don't worry about that.
276
00:09:11,552 --> 00:09:14,127
Bob loves making burgers,
even if they don't get eaten.
277
00:09:14,279 --> 00:09:16,515
Sometimes he just makes 'em
and throws 'em right in the trash.
278
00:09:16,539 --> 00:09:18,131
- Right, Bob?
- No, I don't do that.
279
00:09:18,300 --> 00:09:20,116
- Sometimes.
- Never done that.
280
00:09:20,135 --> 00:09:21,893
- Make her a burger, please.
- Yup.
281
00:09:22,045 --> 00:09:23,377
Look!
282
00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:25,471
Well, I for one
283
00:09:25,624 --> 00:09:28,458
love these outdoor
guidance counseling sessions.
284
00:09:28,551 --> 00:09:30,627
You under a tree,
standing on a ladder,
285
00:09:30,645 --> 00:09:33,146
facing away from us, teaching
us about self-confidence.
286
00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:36,316
- And trees.
- Yup, there's nothing odd about this at all.
287
00:09:36,468 --> 00:09:38,635
Darn it. He's too scared
to play with his toy,
288
00:09:38,804 --> 00:09:40,728
and he's not hungry
enough to come for the food.
289
00:09:40,897 --> 00:09:42,396
I've never felt
that way in my life.
290
00:09:42,416 --> 00:09:43,876
I need a taller ladder.
291
00:09:43,900 --> 00:09:45,787
- No! The bell.
- Wait, wait, wait, we can do this.
292
00:09:45,811 --> 00:09:48,235
We'll just skip our last
class before assembly.
293
00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:49,996
No. No. No skipping class.
294
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:51,405
The assembly.
295
00:09:51,499 --> 00:09:53,483
Principal Spoors will
know if I'm not there.
296
00:09:53,576 --> 00:09:55,630
Why do I have to be so good
at introducing assemblies?
297
00:09:55,654 --> 00:09:58,430
Dr. Bojangles, I need
you to either come down
298
00:09:58,581 --> 00:10:00,432
in the next 35 minutes
or stay up there
299
00:10:00,583 --> 00:10:02,842
for the next two hours,
for your own safety.
300
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:05,328
But I don't know if you're
understanding any of this.
301
00:10:05,347 --> 00:10:07,330
He probably got the
gist. He seems smart.
302
00:10:07,423 --> 00:10:09,423
- He is a doctor.
- It's an honorary degree.
303
00:10:09,501 --> 00:10:12,110
I gave it to him, and
I can take it away.
304
00:10:12,261 --> 00:10:13,572
There's so much
more they could do.
305
00:10:13,596 --> 00:10:15,780
These two characters,
they've got legs.
306
00:10:16,007 --> 00:10:17,576
Well, not Snail, but,
you know, like...
307
00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:20,118
Snail and Newt go to
dental hygienist school.
308
00:10:20,269 --> 00:10:21,694
Kids like that, right?
309
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:24,530
Or what about if Snail and
Newt inherit a haunted mansion?
310
00:10:24,625 --> 00:10:27,292
I know! They
could find a human baby
311
00:10:27,443 --> 00:10:29,276
and raise it up to be
a country music star.
312
00:10:29,371 --> 00:10:31,630
Maybe I should call the
tow truck company again?
313
00:10:31,781 --> 00:10:34,023
- It has been a while. May I use your...?
- No.
314
00:10:34,042 --> 00:10:35,616
I can't call the tow truck?
315
00:10:35,710 --> 00:10:37,802
They actually called while
you were in the bathroom.
316
00:10:38,029 --> 00:10:39,804
- They did?
- Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
317
00:10:40,031 --> 00:10:41,547
Oops. They're
running a little late
318
00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:43,808
because, one of
their tow trucks broke down.
319
00:10:44,035 --> 00:10:46,311
Can you believe it? A tow
truck needing a tow truck.
320
00:10:46,462 --> 00:10:47,940
That's like a doctor
needing a doctor.
321
00:10:47,964 --> 00:10:49,372
Wait, they probably do.
322
00:10:49,465 --> 00:10:51,132
Where were we?
What about...
323
00:10:51,193 --> 00:10:54,043
- Snail and Newt meet a time-traveling spider monkey?
- No.
324
00:10:54,137 --> 00:10:56,488
Who can tell me what
this constellation is?
325
00:10:56,639 --> 00:10:58,064
- The Big Dipper?
- No.
326
00:10:58,216 --> 00:10:59,473
Follow the laser.
327
00:10:59,567 --> 00:11:00,474
The Medium Dipper?
328
00:11:00,568 --> 00:11:02,735
Anyone besides Peter? It's Leo.
329
00:11:02,888 --> 00:11:03,903
He's a lion. See?
330
00:11:04,147 --> 00:11:05,947
Kind of looks like a
cat? Sort of? Not really.
331
00:11:05,982 --> 00:11:07,891
I mean, I don't know
who named these things,
332
00:11:07,909 --> 00:11:10,309
but, you know, maybe
cats used to look different?
333
00:11:10,395 --> 00:11:12,486
- Yes, Gene?
- Nothing.
334
00:11:12,580 --> 00:11:15,899
I just love Leos...
DiCaprio, da Vinci.
335
00:11:15,901 --> 00:11:17,233
Anyway, go on.
336
00:11:17,402 --> 00:11:19,471
Do you think she's starting
to change her mind at all?
337
00:11:19,495 --> 00:11:21,087
- She's coming around, right?
- I mean,
338
00:11:21,239 --> 00:11:23,831
she said, "I'm gonna go work
on my manuscript by myself,"
339
00:11:23,925 --> 00:11:26,184
and then she sat in
the farthest booth away
340
00:11:26,335 --> 00:11:28,169
and she hasn't made
eye contact since.
341
00:11:28,263 --> 00:11:29,670
I just thought if
I could show her
342
00:11:29,690 --> 00:11:31,097
how much we love the books...
343
00:11:31,249 --> 00:11:33,416
Lin, I think she's clear on
how much we love the books.
344
00:11:33,435 --> 00:11:35,585
So maybe it's time to...
345
00:11:35,678 --> 00:11:37,587
You're doing the right thing,
346
00:11:37,756 --> 00:11:40,198
after not doing the
right thing so, so much.
347
00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:43,201
Bea? I'm gonna give
the tow truck another call.
348
00:11:43,428 --> 00:11:44,536
Okay. Thank you.
349
00:11:44,763 --> 00:11:47,113
Hi, I'm calling from Bob's
Burgers on Ocean Avenue.
350
00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:49,782
And, we would
like the truck to come back.
351
00:11:49,935 --> 00:11:51,710
Can I get you something else?
352
00:11:51,937 --> 00:11:54,379
More coffee? Some
ice cream? Napkins?
353
00:11:54,606 --> 00:11:57,031
Sorry, I-I'm just saying
things that we have.
354
00:11:57,125 --> 00:11:58,550
Thank you, no.
355
00:11:58,701 --> 00:12:00,345
No, you
don't need to talk to her.
356
00:12:00,369 --> 00:12:02,612
I'll pay extra, just...
Okay, fine. Hold on.
357
00:12:02,630 --> 00:12:04,205
- Um, Bea?
- Yeah?
358
00:12:04,299 --> 00:12:06,132
They, want to talk to you.
359
00:12:06,284 --> 00:12:07,392
God.
360
00:12:07,543 --> 00:12:09,469
You have to let
go of it from your end.
361
00:12:09,545 --> 00:12:11,378
- Sorry, yeah.
- What are we gonna do?
362
00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:13,639
Just keep smiling
like everything's fine.
363
00:12:13,734 --> 00:12:16,234
Yes, I want the truck. I've
been waiting for a long...
364
00:12:16,311 --> 00:12:17,961
What do you mean cancel again?
365
00:12:17,979 --> 00:12:19,882
- No.
- Keep smiling. Keep smiling.
366
00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:23,390
I definitely want the truck as
soon as possible. Thank you.
367
00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:26,077
Well, I'm gonna wait
outside. No reason.
368
00:12:26,229 --> 00:12:27,804
Yup. Makes sense.
369
00:12:27,822 --> 00:12:29,230
Bea, I'm sorry. Let me explain!
370
00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:30,807
You're coming at me. Um...
371
00:12:30,825 --> 00:12:34,068
No, I know what I did was
a lot, but let me explain.
372
00:12:34,162 --> 00:12:36,329
Look!
373
00:12:36,481 --> 00:12:38,481
Snail keychain.
Hey, that's cute.
374
00:12:38,574 --> 00:12:40,407
And now you've got my
keys. Please just, um...
375
00:12:40,502 --> 00:12:42,001
I'd like... I'd like
to leave now!
376
00:12:42,153 --> 00:12:43,911
- Lin, maybe...
- No, Bea.
377
00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:44,930
You don't understand...
378
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:46,317
You can't keep
me trapped in here.
379
00:12:46,341 --> 00:12:48,099
Stop! Don't come any closer.
380
00:12:48,251 --> 00:12:50,417
Bea, don't leave.
381
00:12:50,437 --> 00:12:52,197
I mean, you can go if
you want to, but don't.
382
00:12:52,330 --> 00:12:53,690
I'm not saying
that in a scary way.
383
00:12:53,756 --> 00:12:55,014
Don't run away from me!
384
00:12:55,166 --> 00:12:56,566
Bea!
385
00:13:00,930 --> 00:13:02,280
Bea, I'm sorry!
Come back inside!
386
00:13:02,431 --> 00:13:03,597
I'll give you your keys,
we can talk about this!
387
00:13:03,617 --> 00:13:04,783
Leave me alone!
388
00:13:04,934 --> 00:13:06,504
- Lin, stop chasing her.
- I'm not chasing her.
389
00:13:06,528 --> 00:13:08,953
I'm helping her.
I'm fine, it's fine.
390
00:13:09,030 --> 00:13:11,848
- Bea!
- I-I got... I got to go inside.
391
00:13:11,866 --> 00:13:13,774
But remember you
can also come inside
392
00:13:13,794 --> 00:13:15,518
and stop doing all of this.
393
00:13:15,537 --> 00:13:16,686
I'll be right in.
394
00:13:16,688 --> 00:13:18,187
It's gonna be fine.
Everything's fine!
395
00:13:18,356 --> 00:13:20,873
If this is goodbye, I love you.
396
00:13:30,702 --> 00:13:32,869
Damn, they're getting
me excited about college.
397
00:13:33,038 --> 00:13:34,295
- Really?
- Tina! Louise!
398
00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:35,866
Don't go into the assembly.
399
00:13:35,890 --> 00:13:37,982
I know how to get
Dr. Bojangles out of the tree.
400
00:13:38,134 --> 00:13:39,633
Ms. Twitchell's laser pointer.
401
00:13:39,653 --> 00:13:42,053
She let me borrow it because I
said I want to do science now.
402
00:13:42,138 --> 00:13:44,564
So if you see her, tell
her I'm doing science now.
403
00:13:44,716 --> 00:13:46,215
Gene, you brilliant bastard.
404
00:13:46,234 --> 00:13:49,068
I can almost smell those "get
out of detention free" passes,
405
00:13:49,220 --> 00:13:51,571
and they smell like getting
out of detention for free.
406
00:13:51,723 --> 00:13:53,573
Gosh, I guess we have
to miss the assembly
407
00:13:53,725 --> 00:13:55,166
to go help Mr. Frond again.
408
00:13:55,393 --> 00:13:57,076
- Too bad.
- Yeah.
409
00:13:57,228 --> 00:13:58,652
You were being sarcastic.
410
00:13:58,730 --> 00:14:00,321
But won't we get in trouble
for skipping the assembly?
411
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:01,840
Frond won't let that happen.
412
00:14:02,067 --> 00:14:05,176
Plus, Tina, Dr. Bojangles' life
hangs in the balance, literally.
413
00:14:05,328 --> 00:14:07,086
If only we could
show Dr. Bojangles
414
00:14:07,238 --> 00:14:08,640
that "hang in there"
kitty cat poster.
415
00:14:08,664 --> 00:14:10,331
Okay, fine. Let's
go find Mr. Frond.
416
00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:11,850
Isn't he emceeing the assembly?
417
00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:13,092
Well, he's not here,
418
00:14:13,244 --> 00:14:14,524
so he must be in
hair and makeup?
419
00:14:14,596 --> 00:14:16,337
Why do you
need such a tall ladder?
420
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:17,834
You could fall and get hurt.
421
00:14:17,858 --> 00:14:19,357
I told you, it's very important,
422
00:14:19,584 --> 00:14:21,228
but I also can't tell
you anything about it.
423
00:14:21,252 --> 00:14:23,194
Mr. Frond, I can't
let you do this.
424
00:14:23,346 --> 00:14:25,438
You know how
uncoordinated you are.
425
00:14:25,590 --> 00:14:27,492
In-in a cute way. It's endearing.
426
00:14:27,516 --> 00:14:29,926
Now, let's go enjoy the
assembly together?
427
00:14:29,944 --> 00:14:30,944
Aah!
428
00:14:31,020 --> 00:14:32,261
The assembly.
429
00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:33,854
Damn, he's not here either.
430
00:14:33,874 --> 00:14:34,947
Cat, yes. Frond, no.
431
00:14:35,041 --> 00:14:36,398
Unless the cat ate him?
432
00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:38,042
There'd be signs of a struggle
433
00:14:38,211 --> 00:14:39,693
and bits of sweater
vest everywhere.
434
00:14:39,787 --> 00:14:41,582
We'll just have to do this ourselves.
435
00:14:41,606 --> 00:14:43,623
I'm gonna call us
The Pointer Sisters
436
00:14:43,775 --> 00:14:45,550
because I'm so excited!
437
00:14:45,701 --> 00:14:46,718
It's not working.
438
00:14:46,869 --> 00:14:48,255
- That cat's broken.
- Give me that.
439
00:14:48,279 --> 00:14:49,946
You can't just flick it around.
440
00:14:50,039 --> 00:14:51,205
You got to flirt a little.
441
00:14:51,299 --> 00:14:52,615
I'd date that dot.
442
00:14:52,617 --> 00:14:54,800
Bea? Let me in, please.
443
00:14:54,895 --> 00:14:57,378
- Mort!
- Hi, Linda!
444
00:14:57,397 --> 00:14:59,380
- Hi, Mort!
- Leave me alone!
445
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,307
I just want to talk to you, Bea!
446
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:02,901
Mort? Come on, let me in.
447
00:15:03,052 --> 00:15:04,068
We're not letting her in.
448
00:15:04,295 --> 00:15:05,978
Mort, can you tell Bea
449
00:15:06,131 --> 00:15:08,798
I'm a very nice, normal person?
450
00:15:08,891 --> 00:15:11,058
There you go, follow that dot,
451
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:12,301
you adorable idiot.
452
00:15:12,470 --> 00:15:13,970
Tina, get ready to
try and grab him.
453
00:15:13,988 --> 00:15:17,156
Gene, it seems like
you two have more in common,
454
00:15:17,292 --> 00:15:18,750
so maybe you should try.
455
00:15:18,826 --> 00:15:21,477
Okay. Here I
come, Dr. Bojangles.
456
00:15:21,496 --> 00:15:24,738
Permission to put my
hands in your armpits?
457
00:15:24,758 --> 00:15:26,907
- Wow.
- Okay.
458
00:15:26,927 --> 00:15:29,986
Now, you just have to carry
him all the way to Frond's office.
459
00:15:30,079 --> 00:15:33,339
Try to make him look like...
a kid who needs counseling?
460
00:15:33,491 --> 00:15:35,416
If anyone asks,
you're having trouble
461
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:37,510
adjusting to your parents'
new living situation.
462
00:15:37,662 --> 00:15:38,937
And it's not your fault.
463
00:15:39,088 --> 00:15:40,438
I don't hear her anymore.
464
00:15:40,589 --> 00:15:42,440
Maybe she realized
that she was scaring you
465
00:15:42,591 --> 00:15:43,991
and she went back
to the restaurant?
466
00:15:44,169 --> 00:15:46,071
She's usually a nice
person, when she's not scary.
467
00:15:46,095 --> 00:15:48,095
What do you say we open the door?
468
00:15:48,114 --> 00:15:49,355
I mean, this is a business,
469
00:15:49,524 --> 00:15:51,324
and sometimes people
come in here, alive ones.
470
00:15:51,509 --> 00:15:52,867
Okay.
471
00:15:53,769 --> 00:15:55,602
And... there you go. No Linda.
472
00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:56,937
- Here I am!
- God!
473
00:15:56,957 --> 00:15:58,514
Sorry. Was that not fun?
474
00:15:58,533 --> 00:16:00,183
That was supposed
to be fun. Look, Bea.
475
00:16:00,351 --> 00:16:02,961
I'm just here to give you your
keys and say I'm really sorry.
476
00:16:03,129 --> 00:16:04,370
Okay, fine. Thank you.
477
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:06,539
So sorry the tow truck
guy left 'cause of me,
478
00:16:06,691 --> 00:16:07,690
and I didn't tell you.
479
00:16:07,709 --> 00:16:09,025
It's only because of the books.
480
00:16:09,118 --> 00:16:10,429
And I won't take up
any more of your time,
481
00:16:10,453 --> 00:16:11,861
but it's $6.50 for the burger.
482
00:16:11,879 --> 00:16:13,972
I'm j... I'm just kidding.
It's on Mort. Right, Mort?
483
00:16:14,123 --> 00:16:15,364
- Wait, what?
- I'm kidding.
484
00:16:15,458 --> 00:16:16,975
Burger's on the
house, of course.
485
00:16:17,126 --> 00:16:19,051
You see? I'm a fun person.
486
00:16:19,204 --> 00:16:20,204
Yeah, you're delightful.
487
00:16:20,296 --> 00:16:22,054
Thank you. Hey,
let's start over.
488
00:16:22,207 --> 00:16:23,873
Clean slate. Hi, I'm Linda,
489
00:16:23,891 --> 00:16:26,291
and I haven't held you hostage
in my restaurant at all today.
490
00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:28,728
And so what's your name, Bea Cromwell?
491
00:16:28,822 --> 00:16:30,046
Bless you.
492
00:16:30,139 --> 00:16:31,214
There's the allergies.
493
00:16:31,307 --> 00:16:32,376
This guy needs his medicine.
494
00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:33,825
The divorce has
been hard on him.
495
00:16:33,976 --> 00:16:35,551
Almost there.
496
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,404
What's happening here?
497
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:41,666
So, you'll maybe consider
writing another Snail and Newt?
498
00:16:41,817 --> 00:16:45,169
Whatever I have
to say until you're gone.
499
00:16:45,321 --> 00:16:48,064
Aw, great. Well,
so nice to meet you.
500
00:16:48,233 --> 00:16:50,399
Here's your keys.
501
00:16:50,401 --> 00:16:52,343
We're good, right? I
feel like we're good.
502
00:16:52,420 --> 00:16:54,012
Should we hug? Let's have a hug.
503
00:16:54,163 --> 00:16:55,996
No, no, no.
504
00:16:57,592 --> 00:16:59,166
I'll, be right back.
505
00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:00,237
Sorry.
506
00:17:00,261 --> 00:17:02,245
All right. Okay.
507
00:17:02,263 --> 00:17:03,670
- Hi, Bob.
- Yep.
508
00:17:03,806 --> 00:17:06,441
That's pretty much what I
pictured was happening here.
509
00:17:10,605 --> 00:17:13,756
Bea, I'm so sorry
about what my wife did,
510
00:17:13,775 --> 00:17:15,867
but maybe you could let her go?
511
00:17:16,018 --> 00:17:17,109
Lin, are you okay?
512
00:17:17,278 --> 00:17:18,497
I'm
fine. I'm great.
513
00:17:18,521 --> 00:17:20,038
Where'd you learn
how to do that?
514
00:17:20,265 --> 00:17:23,115
I studied Krav Maga when I
was researching my latest book.
515
00:17:23,268 --> 00:17:25,117
Very cool. I took
a bike safety class
516
00:17:25,270 --> 00:17:26,435
at the rec center.
517
00:17:26,454 --> 00:17:29,196
- Kind of similar.
- Bea? M-Ms. Cromwell?
518
00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:30,456
L-Linda's not as dangerous
519
00:17:30,608 --> 00:17:32,458
as she might have
seemed to you before.
520
00:17:32,610 --> 00:17:34,627
Canceling my tow
truck? Taking my keys?
521
00:17:34,779 --> 00:17:36,220
I also picked up a hair of yours
522
00:17:36,447 --> 00:17:38,259
that fell off your head
to show the kids later.
523
00:17:38,283 --> 00:17:39,706
Sorry, I know it's weird.
524
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,945
I just feel safer if we do
this until the tow truck comes,
525
00:17:41,969 --> 00:17:43,452
- and maybe the police.
- I get it.
526
00:17:43,621 --> 00:17:46,046
I still don't know what
cat you're talking about.
527
00:17:46,066 --> 00:17:48,066
This cat.
528
00:17:48,217 --> 00:17:50,810
No animals at
school. Wait a second.
529
00:17:50,962 --> 00:17:52,219
I recognize you.
530
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:54,797
Did Mr. Frond bring
his cat to school again?
531
00:17:54,890 --> 00:17:56,074
- No, no. -What, no?
- No, no.
532
00:17:56,301 --> 00:17:57,967
He looked at me
when I said Mr. Frond.
533
00:17:58,060 --> 00:17:59,726
See? There. He
just did it again.
534
00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:01,746
This is our... science project.
535
00:18:01,897 --> 00:18:03,155
Yeah. We made it?
536
00:18:03,249 --> 00:18:05,308
- Pretty good?
- Dear Lord.
537
00:18:05,442 --> 00:18:08,477
How dare
you bring a cat to school?
538
00:18:08,496 --> 00:18:10,096
You probably thought
I'd go easier on you
539
00:18:10,239 --> 00:18:12,072
because he looks
just like my cat,
540
00:18:12,166 --> 00:18:14,741
but you can't bring a
cat onto school property.
541
00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:17,503
Everyone knows that. I'll
handle this, Ms. Schnur.
542
00:18:17,655 --> 00:18:19,839
You three march
yourselves into my office.
543
00:18:19,991 --> 00:18:21,157
I'm calling your parents.
544
00:18:21,175 --> 00:18:22,675
I mean, don't be
too hard on them.
545
00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:24,827
No, no. I'm none too pleased.
546
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:26,345
None too pleased!
547
00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:29,590
It's a good thing I have
allergy medicine for you,
548
00:18:29,758 --> 00:18:31,425
cat I've never met in my life.
549
00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:32,777
In. In. In. In.
550
00:18:32,928 --> 00:18:34,170
All right.
551
00:18:34,188 --> 00:18:36,263
So, you're really good at this.
552
00:18:36,432 --> 00:18:38,432
- What's it called again?
- Krav Maga.
553
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:40,860
Maybe Snail and Newt
could do, Kraw Magoo.
554
00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:42,845
- That would be fun.
- Hey, Lin?
555
00:18:42,938 --> 00:18:46,365
I know how much you...
We all loved those books,
556
00:18:46,517 --> 00:18:47,917
but she doesn't
really need to write
557
00:18:47,943 --> 00:18:49,368
any more Snail
and Newt, does she?
558
00:18:49,445 --> 00:18:51,370
I mean, you know, someday
we'll have grandkids.
559
00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:53,798
Hopefully, like,
20 years from now,
560
00:18:54,025 --> 00:18:55,875
but you'll get to
read them the books
561
00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:57,376
if you're not in jail.
562
00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:59,879
Bea, maybe you could let her go?
563
00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:01,622
And I could hold
her down for you?
564
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:04,291
- W-Would that be helpful?
- I know I went overboard.
565
00:19:04,385 --> 00:19:06,310
It's just I-I thought if
you could write a book,
566
00:19:06,537 --> 00:19:08,704
another book, we
could be back in our bed,
567
00:19:08,797 --> 00:19:11,632
all-all snuggling and
crying and laughing again,
568
00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:14,819
and maybe no one has to grow
up and leave and go to college.
569
00:19:14,970 --> 00:19:16,988
I know it doesn't
make sense. I know.
570
00:19:17,139 --> 00:19:19,181
Lin, if it helps,
I'm pretty sure
571
00:19:19,183 --> 00:19:21,884
at least two of our kids are
gonna have to live at home
572
00:19:21,977 --> 00:19:23,219
for a long time.
573
00:19:23,312 --> 00:19:25,312
I just wish I could
freeze those moments
574
00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:27,814
and go back and live
in 'em a little longer.
575
00:19:27,909 --> 00:19:29,834
You know? Before it's all gone
576
00:19:30,061 --> 00:19:32,244
and we end up here at Mort's.
577
00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:34,079
Get to end up
here. Friend prices.
578
00:19:34,232 --> 00:19:36,174
It makes me sad,
579
00:19:36,359 --> 00:19:37,544
and then I did all this stuff.
580
00:19:37,568 --> 00:19:40,327
- I'm-I'm sorry, Bea.
- Listen, Linda.
581
00:19:40,346 --> 00:19:41,570
My kids are in college now.
582
00:19:41,664 --> 00:19:43,406
And, yeah, it's different,
and I miss them.
583
00:19:43,424 --> 00:19:45,024
And they definitely
don't call me enough,
584
00:19:45,076 --> 00:19:46,075
but it's also good.
585
00:19:46,093 --> 00:19:47,410
Is it? It sounds awful.
586
00:19:47,578 --> 00:19:49,745
- Your life sounds awful.
- Okay, just stop.
587
00:19:49,764 --> 00:19:52,415
It's good because this is
what's supposed to happen.
588
00:19:52,583 --> 00:19:53,916
They're supposed to grow up.
589
00:19:53,935 --> 00:19:56,861
Stuff changes, and then
you enjoy the changes.
590
00:19:57,012 --> 00:19:58,696
And I do so much
less laundry now.
591
00:19:58,847 --> 00:20:00,606
- Yeah.
- That does sound nice.
592
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,091
Thank you, Bea.
593
00:20:02,184 --> 00:20:05,703
I can't feel my arms or my
neck anymore, but thank you.
594
00:20:06,597 --> 00:20:09,373
Bye, Bea! Maybe I'll
come by your reading!
595
00:20:09,450 --> 00:20:10,857
- No!
- I'll just stop by.
596
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:12,268
Ooh, gosh, she's strong.
597
00:20:12,286 --> 00:20:13,886
I love that she put
you in a full nelson.
598
00:20:14,029 --> 00:20:15,549
I love that you
were in a full nelson.
599
00:20:15,623 --> 00:20:17,548
I want to reenact what
happened all night.
600
00:20:17,700 --> 00:20:19,884
Children's book authors.
Great at grappling?
601
00:20:20,035 --> 00:20:21,368
And spelling, I bet.
602
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:23,203
So, how was the
college assembly?
603
00:20:23,223 --> 00:20:25,781
Was it awful, I
hope? Just kidding.
604
00:20:25,874 --> 00:20:27,874
Sort of. I mean, it's
good if you're excited.
605
00:20:27,894 --> 00:20:29,930
What's exciting is, we're
gonna be able to get in anywhere
606
00:20:29,954 --> 00:20:32,212
because our records
are going to be spotless,
607
00:20:32,232 --> 00:20:34,214
thanks to our
friend Dr. Bojangles.
608
00:20:34,234 --> 00:20:36,067
- Who?
- He's a cat who's also a doctor.
609
00:20:36,294 --> 00:20:39,645
Okay. I'm a little
worried about that.
610
00:21:05,782 --> 00:21:07,840
What about Snail
and Newt try stand-up?
611
00:21:07,992 --> 00:21:11,677
Snail and Newt get
fun haircuts. Two tight perms.
612
00:21:11,829 --> 00:21:14,663
Snail and Newt go on
tour with Guns N' Roses.
613
00:21:14,682 --> 00:21:16,682
Snail and Newt
start a fight club.
614
00:21:16,834 --> 00:21:18,776
Snail and Newt go to Buffalo.
615
00:21:18,853 --> 00:21:21,094
Snail and Newt eat
too much mac and cheese,
616
00:21:21,114 --> 00:21:22,688
and then they can't poop.
617
00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:25,007
Snail and Newt go
to couples' counseling
618
00:21:25,026 --> 00:21:26,450
and they work it all out.
619
00:21:32,314 --> 00:21:34,314
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