All language subtitles for Son.of.a.Critch.S01E11.WEBRip.x264-TG.Hi

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese Download
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,421 --> 00:00:03,188 Mary: Sports day today! You better fuel up, huh? 2 00:00:03,213 --> 00:00:04,437 Adult mark: Sports day. 3 00:00:04,462 --> 00:00:06,273 The worst day of the year for a wimp. 4 00:00:06,298 --> 00:00:08,002 An all-day gym class. 5 00:00:08,027 --> 00:00:10,596 I can't eat. The thought of the whole school. 6 00:00:10,621 --> 00:00:12,399 Seeing me collapse in a potato sack. 7 00:00:12,423 --> 00:00:14,155 Is giving my butterflies caterpillars. 8 00:00:14,180 --> 00:00:16,402 Oh... Now, don't ya worry, mark. 9 00:00:16,427 --> 00:00:19,429 We don't expect you to win a bunch of ribbons. Like your brother. 10 00:00:19,454 --> 00:00:22,697 We know you're not gonna win anything. Just have fun. 11 00:00:22,726 --> 00:00:24,442 Adult mark: Such confidence in me. 12 00:00:24,467 --> 00:00:25,289 Hmm. 13 00:00:25,314 --> 00:00:27,547 Adult mark: I was not athletic but, in fairness, 14 00:00:27,571 --> 00:00:29,170 I didn't have the best teachers. 15 00:00:29,239 --> 00:00:30,583 - No shame in losing, son. - [kettle whistles] 16 00:00:30,608 --> 00:00:33,029 - Pop: Kettle's boiled. - I got it. 17 00:00:33,054 --> 00:00:34,629 Mike, luv, I'm sorry, 18 00:00:34,654 --> 00:00:36,489 But I can't give you a driving lesson today. 19 00:00:36,513 --> 00:00:38,755 - What? Why? - [sighs] your father and I. 20 00:00:38,780 --> 00:00:41,080 Agreed to volunteer for sports day. 21 00:00:41,105 --> 00:00:43,016 - What? - My driving test is on Monday! 22 00:00:43,041 --> 00:00:44,638 I have no idea how to parallel park! 23 00:00:44,663 --> 00:00:46,295 Somebody has gotta take me! 24 00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:50,177 - Uh, I'll take you. - Oh no, that's you won't. 25 00:00:50,202 --> 00:00:53,039 - You don't have a licence! - I drive all the time. 26 00:00:53,063 --> 00:00:54,641 You haven't driven since confederation. 27 00:00:54,665 --> 00:00:56,842 Driving a car's like ridin' a bike! 28 00:00:56,866 --> 00:00:59,779 Uh, no offense, pop, but... 29 00:00:59,804 --> 00:01:01,402 I think you're too old to drive. 30 00:01:01,472 --> 00:01:03,512 Mary: Oh, sweet Jesus, no. [kettle clangs lightly] 31 00:01:06,732 --> 00:01:08,365 Oh, too old, am I? 32 00:01:09,341 --> 00:01:11,524 Well, you might be surprised to know. 33 00:01:11,548 --> 00:01:15,728 That I'm still spry enough to turn the... Whatchamacallit. 34 00:01:15,752 --> 00:01:19,138 The... You know, the round thing with the barmy part. 35 00:01:19,163 --> 00:01:20,928 - The steering wheel? - Yes! 36 00:01:20,953 --> 00:01:23,255 That's exactly what it is! 37 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:26,659 Steering wheel, yeah. Well, that was a test, 38 00:01:26,684 --> 00:01:29,849 And you, young man, are ready for a lesson. 39 00:01:30,193 --> 00:01:32,343 Mike sr.: [mouthing] no, you can't go. 40 00:01:32,368 --> 00:01:34,052 [fridge items rattle] 41 00:01:34,077 --> 00:01:36,416 You know what, pop? I don't think I actually need to know. 42 00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:38,302 How to park, so uh... You're off the hook. 43 00:01:38,327 --> 00:01:40,538 Dammit! I'm giving you a lesson! 44 00:01:40,563 --> 00:01:42,927 I'm not too old to drive! 45 00:01:43,587 --> 00:01:45,020 [liquid pours] 46 00:01:45,045 --> 00:01:46,771 - Mary: Pop? - What?! 47 00:01:47,106 --> 00:01:48,551 That's orange juice. 48 00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:51,965 Yeah. So? 49 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:55,780 That's what I want. Vitamin c. 50 00:01:57,343 --> 00:01:58,903 It's good for gout. 51 00:02:01,902 --> 00:02:03,635 [sips tea] 52 00:02:03,660 --> 00:02:04,925 Hmm. 53 00:02:08,076 --> 00:02:11,263 Mmm, mmm, mmm-mmm-mmm. Mmm! 54 00:02:12,179 --> 00:02:14,021 Mmm, mmm. 55 00:02:14,707 --> 00:02:17,073 [loud gulp, clears his throat] 56 00:02:18,137 --> 00:02:21,045 Don't you laugh. I'll see you in the car. 57 00:02:21,091 --> 00:02:22,862 Adult mark: I was going to be humiliated. 58 00:02:22,886 --> 00:02:25,019 In front of the whole school, but it could be worse. 59 00:02:25,055 --> 00:02:26,911 Pop: [coughing] Jesus christ! 60 00:02:26,936 --> 00:02:28,990 Adult mark: My brother was about to die. 61 00:02:30,705 --> 00:02:32,505 [birds chirp] 62 00:02:32,530 --> 00:02:34,930 Adult mark: All the parents came out on sports day. 63 00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:36,897 Many were excited to see their kids, 64 00:02:36,934 --> 00:02:38,545 Who failed the rest of the year, 65 00:02:38,569 --> 00:02:41,224 Redeem themselves with ribbons. 66 00:02:41,249 --> 00:02:43,683 And then there were mine. [car door slams shut] 67 00:02:43,849 --> 00:02:45,681 Are you sure you both have to come? 68 00:02:45,706 --> 00:02:48,441 [sighs] we got stuck volunteering, to be honest. 69 00:02:48,466 --> 00:02:51,690 Mrs. Perez is like a vampire. Just 'cause she got bit, 70 00:02:51,715 --> 00:02:54,271 She's trying to damn as many souls as she can. 71 00:02:54,296 --> 00:02:56,262 Mrs. Perez: [shouting] did you bring any food? 72 00:02:57,599 --> 00:03:00,271 [whispers] I didn't bring any food. 73 00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:04,682 Fox: Mom? Mom? 74 00:03:04,707 --> 00:03:06,088 [low groan] 75 00:03:06,113 --> 00:03:07,612 Aren't you comin'? 76 00:03:07,998 --> 00:03:10,564 Oh, I can watch ya from here, sure. 77 00:03:11,016 --> 00:03:12,693 - Please? - Ugh... 78 00:03:12,718 --> 00:03:14,830 All the other parents actually got out of their cars. 79 00:03:14,855 --> 00:03:17,050 Oh, that's just what I needs now, right? 80 00:03:17,074 --> 00:03:18,849 To be hangin' out with the other parents. 81 00:03:18,874 --> 00:03:20,541 Mom, come on! 82 00:03:20,566 --> 00:03:21,965 I'm gonna break the school record. 83 00:03:21,990 --> 00:03:24,483 I'm gonna get all gold, I promise! 84 00:03:25,148 --> 00:03:27,399 - Woman: Sarah?! - Please? 85 00:03:27,718 --> 00:03:30,685 - Woman: Sarah! - Okay! I'm comin'! 86 00:03:31,116 --> 00:03:33,551 Sister margaret: All right then. Uh... Mrs. Critch, 87 00:03:33,576 --> 00:03:36,477 I have you and mrs. Perez at the refreshments station. 88 00:03:36,502 --> 00:03:38,547 Ooh... Exciting. 89 00:03:38,572 --> 00:03:41,017 Mr. Perez, I hear you work at the hospital. 90 00:03:41,042 --> 00:03:42,774 You'll run the first-aid tent. 91 00:03:42,799 --> 00:03:45,767 Oh no, no, I'm just a technician. 92 00:03:45,792 --> 00:03:47,776 I fix the machines, that's all. 93 00:03:48,050 --> 00:03:50,283 - Hmm. Modesty is a virtue. - Uh, but... 94 00:03:50,308 --> 00:03:52,740 Mr. Critch, I'll have you run the pa. 95 00:03:52,776 --> 00:03:54,575 - How does that sound? - Ha! 96 00:03:54,611 --> 00:03:57,411 Well, I'm more hard news than sports, sister. 97 00:03:58,724 --> 00:04:00,524 Uh, yes, sister. Thank you, sister. 98 00:04:00,549 --> 00:04:02,327 Sorry, sister. 99 00:04:02,398 --> 00:04:04,030 [indistinct chatter] 100 00:04:05,154 --> 00:04:06,886 Surprised to see you. 101 00:04:06,911 --> 00:04:09,511 Thought for sure you'd get off with so many health conditions. 102 00:04:09,554 --> 00:04:11,599 Enh. At least we're in this together. 103 00:04:11,818 --> 00:04:13,650 What shall we lose at first? Long jump? 104 00:04:13,828 --> 00:04:16,844 Sorry, I got out of it. 105 00:04:17,051 --> 00:04:18,422 What? 106 00:04:18,447 --> 00:04:20,501 I'm helping my dad in the first-aid tent. 107 00:04:20,537 --> 00:04:22,172 [sighs] you gotta get me in there. 108 00:04:22,197 --> 00:04:24,556 - Not without an injury. - But don't worry, 109 00:04:24,581 --> 00:04:26,383 I'm sure you'll hurt yourself. 110 00:04:26,408 --> 00:04:28,633 Kids: [indistinct chatter] 111 00:04:28,658 --> 00:04:31,236 Ooh. I see your mom's here. 112 00:04:31,261 --> 00:04:33,895 Yeah. Why wouldn't she be, dork? 113 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:36,328 - I was just making small talk. - I... Didn't... 114 00:04:36,353 --> 00:04:38,419 She seems lovely. [pa system squawks] 115 00:04:38,488 --> 00:04:40,287 Mike critch, reporting field-side. 116 00:04:40,324 --> 00:04:41,489 At st. Bridget's sports day. 117 00:04:41,525 --> 00:04:44,137 We now go live to sister rose. 118 00:04:44,161 --> 00:04:45,894 [low mic feedback] 119 00:04:47,635 --> 00:04:50,881 When we think of sport, children, 120 00:04:51,070 --> 00:04:53,698 We must remember the ancient romans. 121 00:04:53,723 --> 00:04:56,320 Had a sports day too. [bunting flutters] 122 00:04:56,345 --> 00:04:59,328 Theirs was held in the colosseum. 123 00:05:00,028 --> 00:05:03,574 When they threw st. Ignatius to the lions, he exclaimed, 124 00:05:03,918 --> 00:05:07,420 "I am as grain of the field. 125 00:05:07,552 --> 00:05:10,203 And must be ground by the teeth of the lions, 126 00:05:10,228 --> 00:05:13,462 That I may become fit to sit at his table." 127 00:05:14,394 --> 00:05:19,274 So, today, have fun on this field. 128 00:05:20,813 --> 00:05:23,000 Win your ribbons. 129 00:05:23,715 --> 00:05:26,360 But when you pin them to your chests, 130 00:05:26,438 --> 00:05:28,838 Remember the rivers of blood. 131 00:05:28,863 --> 00:05:30,939 That once flowed from the chests. 132 00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:33,109 Of the early christians, 133 00:05:33,134 --> 00:05:35,234 Which stained the sand. 134 00:05:35,259 --> 00:05:39,094 Within that roman colosseum. 135 00:05:40,528 --> 00:05:42,469 Father? [Mic rustles] 136 00:05:42,898 --> 00:05:45,231 Father handrigan: Let the games begin! 137 00:05:45,256 --> 00:05:48,824 Mr. Byrne: [clears throat] kids: [cheering] 138 00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:51,015 All right, people, listen up. 139 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,273 Here is how the day will be ranked. 140 00:05:53,298 --> 00:05:55,276 Gold for excellence, 141 00:05:55,301 --> 00:05:57,100 Silver for losers, 142 00:05:57,125 --> 00:05:59,892 And bronze for the also-rans. 143 00:05:59,917 --> 00:06:02,651 And finally, the participation ribbon. 144 00:06:02,676 --> 00:06:04,776 Which says you may have showed up, 145 00:06:04,801 --> 00:06:07,213 - But you didn't "show up." - I'll take it. 146 00:06:07,238 --> 00:06:09,549 In 1965, 147 00:06:09,574 --> 00:06:12,775 I achieved personal excellence. 148 00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:16,480 By winning five gold ribbons. 149 00:06:16,688 --> 00:06:19,298 That is a st. Bridget's record. 150 00:06:19,322 --> 00:06:21,758 That stands to this very day. 151 00:06:21,783 --> 00:06:25,555 Like me, it is unbreakable. 152 00:06:25,580 --> 00:06:27,891 I'm gonna break that scumbag's record. 153 00:06:27,916 --> 00:06:30,116 Mr. Byrne: Ready... Break! 154 00:06:30,141 --> 00:06:32,608 [shrill whistle blast, airhorn blares] 155 00:06:32,679 --> 00:06:34,824 Kids: [cheering excitedly, indistinct chatter] 156 00:06:34,849 --> 00:06:36,649 Ritchie: Break a leg. Mark: Hopefully. 157 00:06:36,674 --> 00:06:39,653 - [horn blasts] - ah! Horn works, that's good. 158 00:06:39,678 --> 00:06:43,458 Oh... No gloves in the glove box. That's bad. 159 00:06:43,483 --> 00:06:46,328 Now, the first thing you're gonna wanna do. 160 00:06:46,353 --> 00:06:48,665 Is toggle your gauges, 161 00:06:48,690 --> 00:06:51,023 Adjust your seat, and uh... 162 00:06:51,321 --> 00:06:53,866 You just make sure you've got plenty of room in the ashtray. 163 00:06:53,890 --> 00:06:55,586 Okay. Okay, pop, I-I get it, 164 00:06:55,611 --> 00:06:57,910 But are we actually gonna drive? 165 00:06:57,935 --> 00:06:59,979 - Slow down, b'y. - We're gettin' there. 166 00:07:00,004 --> 00:07:02,275 [sighs heavily] pop, we've been here forever. 167 00:07:02,300 --> 00:07:04,281 Please, just get onto the road. 168 00:07:04,306 --> 00:07:06,914 Look, the key is looking both ways. 169 00:07:06,939 --> 00:07:08,639 And then, behind you. 170 00:07:08,664 --> 00:07:10,030 [car idles] 171 00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:11,930 There's no one behind us! 172 00:07:11,955 --> 00:07:14,021 We are in an empty parking lot! 173 00:07:14,046 --> 00:07:15,746 Please, pop, let me take the wheel. 174 00:07:15,771 --> 00:07:17,111 You're too old to drive. 175 00:07:17,136 --> 00:07:19,985 All right, all right, cut your whining! 176 00:07:21,791 --> 00:07:24,496 [gearshift clunks, horn blares as car passes] 177 00:07:24,521 --> 00:07:25,932 Jesus! God! 178 00:07:25,956 --> 00:07:28,711 [window rolls down] frig off, ya prick! 179 00:07:28,827 --> 00:07:31,594 [engine rumbles loudly] 180 00:07:32,460 --> 00:07:34,929 Adult mark: Like a cat on a motivational poster, 181 00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:36,753 Fox was hanging in there, 182 00:07:36,833 --> 00:07:38,599 Fuelled with the kind of stubborn. 183 00:07:38,668 --> 00:07:40,499 You only get from hating your gym teacher. 184 00:07:40,524 --> 00:07:43,503 - [stopwatch clicks] - okay. You won. You can let go. 185 00:07:43,528 --> 00:07:46,195 That is a gold ribbon. 186 00:07:46,220 --> 00:07:48,409 All right, that is a new school record. 187 00:07:48,478 --> 00:07:50,144 For the arm hang. 188 00:07:50,180 --> 00:07:51,788 For girls. 189 00:07:51,975 --> 00:07:55,273 The boys record is... 30 seconds longer, 190 00:07:55,418 --> 00:07:58,886 And that is a record I hold to this very day. 191 00:07:58,922 --> 00:08:01,133 - What?! - I could have beaten that! 192 00:08:01,157 --> 00:08:02,823 You told me to let go! 193 00:08:02,859 --> 00:08:05,338 Boys and girls have different physical thresholds. 194 00:08:05,362 --> 00:08:07,428 There has to be a natural order, 'kay? 195 00:08:08,564 --> 00:08:10,186 [yells] mark, you're next. 196 00:08:10,834 --> 00:08:13,534 [apparatus thumps, mark inhales sharply] 197 00:08:14,020 --> 00:08:15,984 - [relieved exhale] agh... - [stopwatch clicks] 198 00:08:16,009 --> 00:08:20,177 [chuckles] and mark has set a new boy's record. 199 00:08:20,351 --> 00:08:23,130 For shortest arm hang ever! 200 00:08:23,155 --> 00:08:27,023 [mr. Byrne's and kids laugh] 201 00:08:27,911 --> 00:08:30,696 Adult mark: If everyone was going to laugh at me anyway, 202 00:08:30,720 --> 00:08:33,046 I might as well make them laugh on purpose. 203 00:08:33,225 --> 00:08:35,090 Your daughter's doing very well! 204 00:08:35,115 --> 00:08:37,067 Yeah! Oh, she's great at sports. 205 00:08:37,092 --> 00:08:39,129 I mean, not so much everything else, but you know. 206 00:08:39,217 --> 00:08:40,494 Fox: Mom! Did you see? 207 00:08:40,519 --> 00:08:42,219 I got gold! 208 00:08:42,244 --> 00:08:43,941 I would've had the boys record too, 209 00:08:43,966 --> 00:08:45,677 But mr. Byrne stopped the clock on me! 210 00:08:45,702 --> 00:08:48,569 Don't go showin' everyone up, now. Nobody likes that. 211 00:08:48,770 --> 00:08:50,303 Well, sure, it's just sports. 212 00:08:50,328 --> 00:08:52,530 I just don't want you gettin' a big head on ya, that's all. 213 00:08:52,555 --> 00:08:54,236 [quietly] no worry of that around her. 214 00:08:54,261 --> 00:08:56,689 Mike sr.: Boys and girls club are selling chippers. 215 00:08:56,713 --> 00:08:58,832 And ice cream sandwiches for fifty cents. 216 00:08:58,857 --> 00:09:01,193 Why don't you go on back out there and I'll be right out. 217 00:09:01,217 --> 00:09:03,183 - No, but... - Go on! 218 00:09:05,202 --> 00:09:07,226 Did you have somethin' to say to me? 219 00:09:07,291 --> 00:09:09,234 Just gonna offer you a cookie. 220 00:09:09,374 --> 00:09:11,270 Chocolate chip. Go on! 221 00:09:11,294 --> 00:09:12,927 They look store bought. 222 00:09:12,996 --> 00:09:15,696 Gold. Congratulations. 223 00:09:15,765 --> 00:09:18,632 - You're goin' down, old man. - Suzanne: [laughing] 224 00:09:18,777 --> 00:09:20,443 Mom! Look! 225 00:09:20,468 --> 00:09:22,982 - [laughs] oh, that's... Stop! - Mike sr.: And the grade 8 boys. 226 00:09:23,006 --> 00:09:24,839 Are the victors in the tug of war. 227 00:09:24,908 --> 00:09:27,116 Congratulations, boys! 228 00:09:27,141 --> 00:09:30,310 Hey. I'm gonna have to start calling you klondike. 229 00:09:30,347 --> 00:09:32,379 'Cause that's one heck of a gold rush. 230 00:09:32,415 --> 00:09:34,327 Mr. Byrne: All right, bring it in! Bring it in! 231 00:09:34,351 --> 00:09:36,717 You see, the gold rush was a migration of sorts. 232 00:09:36,786 --> 00:09:38,831 Of prospectors to the yukon... 233 00:09:38,855 --> 00:09:41,088 Who cares about ribbons, anyways? 234 00:09:42,070 --> 00:09:43,722 Adult mark: I wanted to go after her, 235 00:09:43,747 --> 00:09:47,081 But fox was as interested in me as her mom was in her. 236 00:09:47,263 --> 00:09:49,730 Fox: Mom! Mary: I think your little one's. 237 00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:51,688 Trying to get your attention there. 238 00:09:51,713 --> 00:09:54,013 Sports, baby! Yeah! 239 00:09:54,629 --> 00:09:57,499 - Uh... Huh, huh... - My god, 240 00:09:57,766 --> 00:10:00,166 Some people don't mind their youngsters at all. 241 00:10:00,191 --> 00:10:02,316 Mike sr.: Up next, we have my son, mark, 242 00:10:02,379 --> 00:10:04,611 At the high jump! Just get it over with, son. 243 00:10:04,648 --> 00:10:06,147 It's like ripping off a band-aid. 244 00:10:06,172 --> 00:10:08,482 [shrill whistle blast] adult mark: I decided to compete. 245 00:10:08,551 --> 00:10:10,154 In my own version of the biathlon. 246 00:10:10,179 --> 00:10:13,353 But instead of ski and shoot, I'd run and joke. 247 00:10:14,299 --> 00:10:16,010 Mr. Byrne: Gimme that pole! 248 00:10:16,035 --> 00:10:17,601 - Woo! - Give me that... 249 00:10:17,626 --> 00:10:19,438 - Yeah! - [kids laugh] 250 00:10:19,463 --> 00:10:21,202 Woo! 251 00:10:21,676 --> 00:10:23,675 [ghostly] ahhh... I'm a ghost! 252 00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:26,500 Woo-ooo! Ooo... I'm a ghost. 253 00:10:26,525 --> 00:10:28,866 Boooo... I'm a ghost 254 00:10:29,270 --> 00:10:30,782 [shrill whistle blast] oooo... 255 00:10:30,845 --> 00:10:32,743 You are not funny! 256 00:10:32,964 --> 00:10:35,119 Mike sr.: Attention, students! Due to rain, some of the grass... 257 00:10:35,144 --> 00:10:36,543 Sin. Tsk, tsk, tsk. 258 00:10:36,779 --> 00:10:38,646 Mike sr.: Nothing will be cancelled... 259 00:10:38,671 --> 00:10:41,166 That little fella's ruinin' it for everyone, if you ask me. 260 00:10:41,191 --> 00:10:43,684 Not fit, I says. 261 00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:45,827 - [indistinct chatter] - 'scuse me. 262 00:10:45,998 --> 00:10:48,131 You are making an arse of yourself. 263 00:10:48,156 --> 00:10:50,034 So? That's all I'm good for. 264 00:10:50,059 --> 00:10:51,334 I can't do any of this stuff. 265 00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:53,292 - How do you know? - You haven't even tried. 266 00:10:53,347 --> 00:10:56,725 - I'm sorry I'm not athletic! - I can't change who I am! 267 00:10:56,921 --> 00:10:58,388 Oh, give it up! 268 00:10:58,763 --> 00:11:01,631 Nobody is mad at you 'cause you suck at sports. 269 00:11:01,726 --> 00:11:04,090 They're mad at ya 'cause you're makin' this all about you! 270 00:11:04,327 --> 00:11:06,513 You could be the worst one on the team and still win, 271 00:11:06,538 --> 00:11:08,419 But if you don't even try, well, then you're just draggin' 272 00:11:08,444 --> 00:11:10,108 Everybody else down with ya! 273 00:11:10,551 --> 00:11:11,913 Hey! [Snaps her fingers] 274 00:11:12,141 --> 00:11:14,787 I don't give a flying frig if you win, 275 00:11:14,827 --> 00:11:16,827 But you are gonna try your best. 276 00:11:16,852 --> 00:11:18,116 And if you don't, 277 00:11:18,141 --> 00:11:20,733 Oh, you are gonna win a gold in long distance running 278 00:11:20,757 --> 00:11:24,336 'cause by the Jesus, if I catches ya, I'll kill ya! 279 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:25,741 Smarten up! 280 00:11:25,766 --> 00:11:28,311 Adult mark: Like a mother bird kicking its baby from the nest, 281 00:11:28,336 --> 00:11:30,581 Mom was a fan of tough love. 282 00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:33,367 She was right. I was letting everyone down, 283 00:11:33,392 --> 00:11:35,125 Including myself. 284 00:11:35,150 --> 00:11:37,483 [shrill whistle blast] I was going to do it. 285 00:11:37,508 --> 00:11:39,307 I was going to show everyone. 286 00:11:39,332 --> 00:11:41,965 I was going to bring home the gold! 287 00:11:41,990 --> 00:11:46,659 ♪♪♪ 288 00:11:46,970 --> 00:11:49,269 [bar clatters, heavy thud] urgh! Oh! 289 00:11:49,294 --> 00:11:50,788 [grunts] 290 00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:53,609 Ow... 291 00:11:55,236 --> 00:11:56,635 [pole knocks] 292 00:11:56,802 --> 00:11:58,613 - Just, just leave it. - Just leave it there. 293 00:11:58,638 --> 00:12:00,270 [pole rattles] just, just... Go on. 294 00:12:00,295 --> 00:12:01,705 Get. Get! 295 00:12:01,730 --> 00:12:04,430 Adult mark: Or maybe a silver would be nice. 296 00:12:07,094 --> 00:12:08,356 [T] 297 00:12:08,381 --> 00:12:10,216 Mike sr.: That red-headed girl is in the lead; 298 00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:11,939 Boy-with-glasses is on her heels; 299 00:12:11,975 --> 00:12:15,042 Girl-too-tall-for-her-age is keeping pace, and... 300 00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:17,145 Lastly, my boy is in the rear. 301 00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:18,724 Woman: Woo-hoo! 302 00:12:18,748 --> 00:12:20,167 Man: Hustle! Mary: Come on, mark! 303 00:12:20,192 --> 00:12:22,228 - Parents: [clap and cheer] - I'm here to end you. 304 00:12:22,252 --> 00:12:23,884 You're welcome to try. 305 00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:25,686 Adult mark: I really tried. 306 00:12:25,755 --> 00:12:27,888 I tried like I'd never tried for anything. 307 00:12:28,024 --> 00:12:29,902 In my 12 long years on earth. 308 00:12:29,926 --> 00:12:32,705 Mark, there's a stack of participations over there. 309 00:12:32,729 --> 00:12:36,163 Maybe grab a couple and save yourself the trouble. 310 00:12:36,232 --> 00:12:39,278 Adult mark: But try as I might, I still sucked. 311 00:12:39,302 --> 00:12:41,268 - [breathing hard] - [shrill whistle blast] 312 00:12:42,672 --> 00:12:44,512 Mike sr.: And there'll be a fifty-fifty draw. 313 00:12:44,574 --> 00:12:47,708 If you want a ticket, please see sister margaret. 314 00:12:47,844 --> 00:12:49,643 By the bathrooms. 315 00:12:49,679 --> 00:12:51,645 [indistinct chatter] 316 00:12:53,249 --> 00:12:56,116 - Hi. - Hi. 317 00:12:57,453 --> 00:13:00,053 - Uh, um... - [ice rattles in cooler] 318 00:13:01,123 --> 00:13:02,923 Juice? 319 00:13:07,129 --> 00:13:09,663 All right. [Light pats] 320 00:13:13,135 --> 00:13:15,581 I hope this helps. 321 00:13:15,605 --> 00:13:17,872 - [sharp pained inhale] - oh, sorry. 322 00:13:18,007 --> 00:13:19,674 Sorry. 323 00:13:19,809 --> 00:13:21,409 [laughter, indistinct chatter] 324 00:13:21,544 --> 00:13:22,943 Hey. 325 00:13:22,979 --> 00:13:24,912 Congratulations. 326 00:13:25,047 --> 00:13:26,747 It's pretty cool to see. 327 00:13:26,883 --> 00:13:28,482 You're really gonna break that record. 328 00:13:28,551 --> 00:13:30,162 Thanks. 329 00:13:30,186 --> 00:13:32,965 [indistinct chatter] kid: All right, come on. 330 00:13:32,989 --> 00:13:36,257 Glad somebody cares. 331 00:13:36,392 --> 00:13:38,091 How are you holding up? 332 00:13:38,127 --> 00:13:40,827 Embarrassed, winded, 333 00:13:40,864 --> 00:13:43,564 Hurting inside and out, [sighs] 334 00:13:43,699 --> 00:13:46,634 But I, I kind of, almost, had fun that time. 335 00:13:46,703 --> 00:13:48,835 Mr. Byrne: Mike! Kick it back! 336 00:13:48,872 --> 00:13:50,905 Just kick the thing! 337 00:13:53,276 --> 00:13:55,887 - Woman: Keep going! - [hard kick] whoa! 338 00:13:55,911 --> 00:13:57,723 - [hard thud] - oh! 339 00:13:57,747 --> 00:13:59,647 [gasping for air] 340 00:14:00,917 --> 00:14:03,548 He's fine. Just got the wind knocked out of him, that's all. 341 00:14:03,573 --> 00:14:05,496 Adult mark: Getting the wind knocked out of you. 342 00:14:05,521 --> 00:14:08,300 Was one of those injuries that only ever happened in childhood. 343 00:14:08,324 --> 00:14:09,990 Like getting a stitch. Ritchie: Mark! 344 00:14:10,059 --> 00:14:12,459 I knew you'd make it! I'll grab you a soda. 345 00:14:12,495 --> 00:14:14,194 Uh, don't go! 346 00:14:14,264 --> 00:14:16,463 My leg still hurts. 347 00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:19,232 Oh. Sorry. 348 00:14:21,070 --> 00:14:23,504 Relax. You can give up now. 349 00:14:23,573 --> 00:14:26,607 [sighs heavily] [ice rattles] 350 00:14:26,676 --> 00:14:29,142 Adult mark: My chest was as bruised as my ego, 351 00:14:29,178 --> 00:14:32,012 But I finally had an honourable discharge. 352 00:14:32,048 --> 00:14:35,594 But my mother's glare was colder than any pop can. 353 00:14:35,618 --> 00:14:38,063 I knew what I had to do. 354 00:14:38,087 --> 00:14:40,321 - [can rolls in the ice] - hey! 355 00:14:40,456 --> 00:14:43,557 - Where ya goin'? - I'm gonna win a ribbon. 356 00:14:43,626 --> 00:14:45,838 - [horn blares] - asshole! 357 00:14:45,862 --> 00:14:47,339 What the hell's his problem? 358 00:14:47,363 --> 00:14:49,363 Pop, you're not even goin' 30. 359 00:14:49,498 --> 00:14:51,332 Please, it's my lesson, just let me drive. 360 00:14:51,467 --> 00:14:53,829 You think I'm too old to drive, don't ya? Hmm? 361 00:14:53,978 --> 00:14:56,245 Ah, thank god I'm not sharin' a room with you. 362 00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:58,052 Probably wake up in the middle of the night. 363 00:14:58,077 --> 00:15:00,277 To find you standing there with a pillow! 364 00:15:00,302 --> 00:15:01,835 Don't get mad, but... 365 00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:03,826 Your eyesight just isn't what it used to be. 366 00:15:03,851 --> 00:15:05,951 And what do you know about getting old? 367 00:15:05,976 --> 00:15:07,575 Everybody babying you! 368 00:15:07,600 --> 00:15:09,916 Everyone telling you what you can't do! 369 00:15:09,953 --> 00:15:11,931 Hey, pop, I, I think you're going too fast. 370 00:15:11,956 --> 00:15:14,368 - You think I like to drive? - I hate driving! 371 00:15:14,393 --> 00:15:16,560 You know what I hate more than bloody well driving? 372 00:15:16,585 --> 00:15:19,392 Is people telling me I can't bloody well drive! 373 00:15:19,417 --> 00:15:21,377 - Pop! You gotta slow down! - [police siren wails] 374 00:15:21,402 --> 00:15:24,115 - Oh! Oh shoot! God! - Oh my god, the pigs! 375 00:15:24,140 --> 00:15:26,072 Oh! What am I gonna do? 376 00:15:26,097 --> 00:15:27,874 - Pull over! - Oh jeez... 377 00:15:27,899 --> 00:15:29,532 [grunts] 378 00:15:29,557 --> 00:15:31,790 [sighs] I'm an old fool. 379 00:15:31,815 --> 00:15:34,322 Now, they're gonna take my licence. 380 00:15:34,948 --> 00:15:37,962 I'm too old to drive. [siren wail gets louder] 381 00:15:38,441 --> 00:15:40,642 [siren stops wailing] I'm just too old. 382 00:15:40,667 --> 00:15:43,212 [sighs] dammit! [police door clicks opens] 383 00:15:43,884 --> 00:15:45,450 [door bangs shut] 384 00:15:48,096 --> 00:15:49,628 Ah, young mike! 385 00:15:49,789 --> 00:15:51,688 Takin' him out for a few lessons are ya, pat? 386 00:15:51,713 --> 00:15:53,560 Well, he won't listen to me. 387 00:15:53,585 --> 00:15:56,345 Maybe you'll listen to officer butt, here. 388 00:15:56,370 --> 00:15:58,448 Ah, he's too timid. 389 00:15:58,473 --> 00:16:00,473 Not quite ready for the road. 390 00:16:00,498 --> 00:16:02,164 Bit of a nervous nelly, 391 00:16:02,223 --> 00:16:04,690 Just like his father. [pop and officer butt chuckle] 392 00:16:04,859 --> 00:16:07,959 Oh, damn kids today, they just don't know how to drive. 393 00:16:08,277 --> 00:16:09,657 That true? 394 00:16:11,473 --> 00:16:12,984 Yes, officer. 395 00:16:13,009 --> 00:16:15,409 Sorry, I'm just a little nervous is all. 396 00:16:15,633 --> 00:16:17,666 All right. I'll let you off with a warning. 397 00:16:17,691 --> 00:16:19,086 Stick to the side roads, 398 00:16:19,111 --> 00:16:20,978 And listen to your grandfather! [hard pats] 399 00:16:21,223 --> 00:16:23,298 - Both: [chuckling] - yes, sir. 400 00:16:24,138 --> 00:16:26,939 Um... Well, thanks. I, I, I... 401 00:16:26,964 --> 00:16:29,031 Hey, don't mention it. 402 00:16:29,056 --> 00:16:32,058 - You wanna switch back? - No, no. Uh... 403 00:16:32,143 --> 00:16:34,345 I think you're ready. 404 00:16:34,949 --> 00:16:37,892 [birds chirp, pop chuckles softly] 405 00:16:38,181 --> 00:16:40,474 Mom! I tied mr. Byrne for the record, 406 00:16:40,510 --> 00:16:42,388 But three-legged race is next! 407 00:16:42,412 --> 00:16:44,145 They didn't have that when he went here. 408 00:16:44,280 --> 00:16:46,346 - I'm gonna beat him! - It'll all be over then, 409 00:16:46,416 --> 00:16:48,014 - Will it? Good. - Uh... 410 00:16:48,051 --> 00:16:50,817 - I'll bet you got a medal. - [laughs] go on! 411 00:16:51,921 --> 00:16:53,554 How are ya there, paul? 412 00:16:53,689 --> 00:16:56,156 Lisa not here today? Nah, I 'spose not. 413 00:16:56,292 --> 00:16:57,958 Her eight-months pregnant and all. 414 00:16:58,094 --> 00:17:00,327 She's probably at home, right? 415 00:17:00,396 --> 00:17:02,296 Well, you should go watch. 416 00:17:02,431 --> 00:17:04,164 Your youngster there now, [button pops] 417 00:17:04,300 --> 00:17:06,533 Or else you might have to watch your back. 418 00:17:06,602 --> 00:17:10,003 [indistinct chatter] 419 00:17:10,073 --> 00:17:12,918 Button up, now. [whistle blows in the distance] 420 00:17:12,942 --> 00:17:14,842 [distant laughter and chatter] 421 00:17:16,312 --> 00:17:19,513 I know that I should probably mind my own business, 422 00:17:19,649 --> 00:17:21,927 But for some reason that little girl, 423 00:17:21,951 --> 00:17:24,184 She just thinks the world of you. 424 00:17:25,955 --> 00:17:28,567 And all she wants is for you to... 425 00:17:28,591 --> 00:17:30,491 Show some kind of interest in her. 426 00:17:34,097 --> 00:17:36,396 You're right. 427 00:17:36,432 --> 00:17:39,533 You should mind your own business. 428 00:17:39,569 --> 00:17:41,335 My love, come on now. 429 00:17:41,470 --> 00:17:43,504 Let's go! We don't wanna miss anything! 430 00:17:43,639 --> 00:17:45,172 Adult mark: All eyes were on fox. 431 00:17:45,241 --> 00:17:47,207 This was history in the making. 432 00:17:47,243 --> 00:17:48,542 [shrill whistle blast] 433 00:17:48,578 --> 00:17:51,011 Last event: Three-legged race. 434 00:17:52,414 --> 00:17:54,481 I'm gonna beat your ass, old man. 435 00:17:54,550 --> 00:17:56,929 [chuckles] that's cheating. 436 00:17:56,953 --> 00:17:59,019 We didn't have that in my day. It's not fair. 437 00:17:59,088 --> 00:18:00,866 You already cheated. 438 00:18:00,890 --> 00:18:02,923 You wouldn't let me go for the boy's record! 439 00:18:02,959 --> 00:18:04,959 Okay. 440 00:18:05,094 --> 00:18:06,426 You wanna compete with the boys? 441 00:18:06,462 --> 00:18:08,729 Good. 442 00:18:08,798 --> 00:18:11,031 This event will be co-ed. 443 00:18:11,100 --> 00:18:13,300 The winners gets two gold ribbons! 444 00:18:14,403 --> 00:18:16,003 [shrill whistle blast] pair up! 445 00:18:16,138 --> 00:18:17,838 Uh, ritchie and tina. 446 00:18:17,907 --> 00:18:20,373 Gary and avery. 447 00:18:20,409 --> 00:18:22,776 Fox and mark. 448 00:18:22,845 --> 00:18:24,323 Adult mark: Mr. Byrne was determined. 449 00:18:24,347 --> 00:18:26,647 To protect his record with the most devastating tool. 450 00:18:26,782 --> 00:18:29,449 Of sabotage he could find... Me. 451 00:18:33,856 --> 00:18:35,389 R.: And now a first-time event. 452 00:18:35,524 --> 00:18:37,591 In sports day history at st. Bridget's: 453 00:18:37,726 --> 00:18:39,727 A mixed doubles three-legged race. 454 00:18:39,862 --> 00:18:42,529 The ankle twister, the hobbler, the equalizer. 455 00:18:42,598 --> 00:18:44,464 Good luck all! 456 00:18:44,534 --> 00:18:46,333 Better not wreck this for me. 457 00:18:46,468 --> 00:18:48,647 Hate to say this, but I'm pretty sure I will. 458 00:18:48,671 --> 00:18:50,382 [shrill whistle blast] 459 00:18:50,406 --> 00:18:52,339 [inspirational music plays] 460 00:18:53,409 --> 00:19:01,409 ♪♪♪ 461 00:19:02,818 --> 00:19:04,785 Adult mark: Everyone loves an underdog. 462 00:19:04,854 --> 00:19:07,354 Even our mothers had put aside their differences. 463 00:19:07,489 --> 00:19:09,857 The louder they cheered, the faster I went. 464 00:19:09,992 --> 00:19:13,159 It was as if nothing could stop us. 465 00:19:13,196 --> 00:19:16,063 - [low slow-motion voice] - come on! 466 00:19:16,132 --> 00:19:18,977 Adult mark: Then I did. 467 00:19:19,001 --> 00:19:20,935 [distantly] aggggghhhhhhhhh! 468 00:19:21,070 --> 00:19:24,037 - [low slow-motion voice] - oh, for... Noooo! 469 00:19:25,074 --> 00:19:27,741 Come on, fox! 470 00:19:27,876 --> 00:19:30,344 [lawn rustles] 471 00:19:30,413 --> 00:19:32,313 Oh! Go on without me! 472 00:19:32,448 --> 00:19:35,427 Fox: I can't, idiot! 473 00:19:35,451 --> 00:19:38,797 - [low slow-motion voice] - come on! Come on! 474 00:19:38,821 --> 00:19:41,589 [low slow-motion cheering] 475 00:19:43,526 --> 00:19:45,092 Woman: Get off, get off! 476 00:19:45,227 --> 00:19:48,062 [fox grunts, whistle blows, cheering and clapping] 477 00:19:48,197 --> 00:19:52,065 - Third place for my boy! - A complete shock for everyone! 478 00:19:52,101 --> 00:19:54,200 [cheering and clapping] 479 00:19:54,237 --> 00:19:56,903 - [panting] we won! - We lost, dumb-ass. 480 00:19:56,939 --> 00:19:58,305 But... We won third! 481 00:19:58,440 --> 00:20:02,887 - Still got it! - All time sports day greatest! 482 00:20:02,912 --> 00:20:05,642 [laughing] the greatest, you hear me?! 483 00:20:05,667 --> 00:20:07,826 Adult mark: Mr. Bryne had peaked in junior high. 484 00:20:07,850 --> 00:20:10,798 And he spent decades hanging onto those past glories. 485 00:20:10,823 --> 00:20:12,819 Luckily, that was one record. 486 00:20:12,844 --> 00:20:14,986 That fox was not going to break. 487 00:20:15,072 --> 00:20:18,345 That sports day, she won the prize she really wanted. 488 00:20:18,370 --> 00:20:20,681 - Oh... - I'm sorry. 489 00:20:20,767 --> 00:20:23,167 I wasted your time. I didn't break the record. 490 00:20:23,192 --> 00:20:27,329 I saw all o' that, my ducky, and you were awesome. 491 00:20:27,354 --> 00:20:28,728 Oh... 492 00:20:28,788 --> 00:20:31,154 You're always a winner in my books. 493 00:20:31,298 --> 00:20:32,951 Sure, look at all the gold on ya. 494 00:20:32,975 --> 00:20:35,548 You got more gold than mr. T. [chuckles] 495 00:20:35,573 --> 00:20:37,740 I got my first real ribbon! 496 00:20:37,765 --> 00:20:40,278 - Third place. - Seriously? 497 00:20:40,303 --> 00:20:42,169 So, there were only three of you in the race? 498 00:20:42,194 --> 00:20:43,282 Hey. 499 00:20:45,269 --> 00:20:47,881 [hands clap lightly, light pat] 500 00:20:47,906 --> 00:20:49,683 So? How was he? 501 00:20:49,708 --> 00:20:51,475 Pop: He almost got a ticket, 502 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,733 But I talked the cop out of it. 503 00:20:54,657 --> 00:20:55,989 [gruff chuckle] 504 00:20:56,645 --> 00:21:00,848 [light pats] Adult mark: That day, I learned that you never really lose. 505 00:21:00,873 --> 00:21:02,251 Unless you quit, 506 00:21:02,276 --> 00:21:04,309 And that with the right people on your side, 507 00:21:04,334 --> 00:21:07,517 Losing can feel an awful lot like winning. 508 00:21:08,323 --> 00:21:15,195 ♪♪♪ 509 00:21:16,018 --> 00:21:22,890 ♪♪♪ 510 00:21:23,025 --> 00:21:29,963 ♪♪♪ 511 00:21:29,999 --> 00:21:37,504 ♪♪♪ 38320

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.