All language subtitles for Southern Charm S06E04 Barking up the Wrong Tree House 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 H 264-NTb_track3_[eng]

- Previously on

- Previously on
"Southern Charm"...

For Kathryn,
it's out with the old

and in with the new.

New house...
$6,600 a month.

- What?

- New car...

A Rolls is the epitome of...

- I'm rich as (BLEEP).

- And new man.

- I'm actually dating someone.

He's a senator.

- Meanwhile, for me, well,
it's always Groundhog Day.

Being at home with
a baby all day is very...

mind-numbing.

And after Kathryn
planned a girl's trip...

- I'm talking yoga.
I'm talking hiking.

- We knew one person who
wouldn't be on the guest list.

- I just feel like
Kathryn has a problem with me

because I have such a close
relationship with Thomas.

- And just as things
were really heating up

between Austen and Madison...

- If I could reach across,
I'd kiss you.

- [kisses]

- Shep and Craig had no choice

but to extinguish the flame.

- Madison had her friend
DM Danni's new boyfriend

with, like, a picture of her
and was like, "Hey,

do you think my friend's hot?"
- What?

- Rip the Band-Aid off.
Do you want this to fester?

Then do it right now.
- Just call her.

- What you're telling me
is that that's true.

[dramatic music]

- That was a total admission.

- Holy sh--.

Yeah, I'm sorry, dude.
That actually sucks, dude.

- Don't worry about.
It's okay.

♪ ♪

[upbeat jazzy music]

♪ ♪

- [exhales]
You know, my hair,

I don't know, Madison...

- Something's not right
on the top part.

- It's not right.
She was distracted today.

♪ ♪

- [exhales]

I think I lost my phone.

♪ ♪

(BLEEP).

[razor buzzing]

- [exhales]

I think my brain's not working.

I should probably
drink some water.

- Knock knock.

- Hi.
- I have a surfboard for Shep.

- So Shep said, "I'm getting
my hair cut at this place.

Will you drop a surfboard
off there?"

- That's exactly
what he told me.

- That's good service.
- Yep.

- [mutters] Oh, my God.

[keys clacking]

[playful knocking on door]

- Yo.

What's up?
- Hey, buddy.

God, come in like
a ----ing freight train.

- You know, being productive
and active and sh--.

Saving the world.
- Are you?

- Yeah, I brought you sh--.
- You did?

- Yeah, you know,
trying to be a good friend.

- Thank--dude, this is best
thing you've ever done for me.

- Honestly, it probably is.
- No, it might be.

- Do you have a beer?
I need a beer.

Do you want one?
- No, I do not.

(BLEEP) no.

I just need all this nutrition.

Dude.

Was this whole thing blown
out of proportion?

- I don't think so.
- No?

- No.
Your girlfriend had her friend

message a guy
because she's so sneaky that

she knows how to do this
without getting caught.

- Right.
Okay, okay.

I guess...
I mean, sh--, man.

I clearly have feelings,
you know?

I wish that I could turn it
on and off like Shep.

- Yeah, but, dude,
I think she's a man-eater.

- She only had
like three boyfriends.

- She only had three boyfriends

because the other ones
didn't respond on Instagram.

- (BLEEP) you.
- [chuckles]

- But, dude, it's embarrassing
to admit to your friends

that you love someone

and then to, like, get--

I don't know, man.
- You're like--

- Clearly, I have no idea what
I'm doing and I've never known.

- [laughs]
I'm not laughing at you.

I'm laughing with the hilarity
that is girls.

No one ever knows what
they're ----ing doing.

- [sighs]

I've never been in such, like,
a good spot.

Like, I'd never been in
such, like, a good place,

you know, with someone.

But as much as it hurts to say,
it's over.

I mean, you gotta just
tell yourself that

clearly, she doesn't
care about you

like you thought she did.

Is it bad that
I'm gonna miss her?

- No, it just is what it is.
People suck.

- I am so sad, man.
- I know.

You should watch "Frozen."

That's what I do when I'm sad.
- [soft laugh]

[upbeat jazzy music]

♪ ♪

- Miss Chelsea.

- Hi.
- How are you?

- You just got a delivery,
ya diva.

- I did, did I?
Look at this, man.

- Is that--what size is that?

- It's 7'4".

I'm an old, fat guy now,
so I gotta get a big board.

- Let's cut your hair

and then you can cuddle
with that when we're done.

- Okay.

I just washed my hair,

so you can just, like,
spray it or whatever.

- Yeah, we're just gonna wet it.

- It was either you or Madison.

- Competition's tough, huh?

- Uh, I don't think she'll
be cutting my hair anytime soon.

- No, why is that?

- You--I think you know the st--

that she--she DM--
she got a friend to DM Danni's--

- Yes.
- Okay. Well.

- This might be cold.
- It's okay.

- Okay, so
have you seen this DM?

- No.
- Okay.

- I'm not Nancy Drew
or anything.

But anyway, I guess it's over.

Austen was pretty upset.

- Oh, he's so upset about
a message on Instagram

but not too upset
to have a threesome on her.

- This is ----ing bullsh--.
- Madison. Madison.

- Listen, she could have
walked away after that

and nobody would have blamed her
one single bit.

- But that's what I'm saying,
how can you be

so upset over
an Instagram message...

- Because they tried
to make it work.

- After you've been cheating
on each other?

To me, you get what you give.

- Go ahead?

- If you want a good woman

and someone that doesn't
cheat on you,

then be a good man and don't
cheat on the person you're with.

- Yeah, well...
- Do better.

And you'll find better.
- Yeah, maybe so.

Well, yeah, yeah, okay.
That's true.

But the threesome
was so long ago.

Can we forget that?
That was four months ago.

You can't rake
someone over the coals

for the rest of their lives.

You're the only chill person
that he's ever dated in my...

- Well, from what I heard
last from Madison,

well, he talked sh-- about me.

And she has
the screenshots of it.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- Which isn't that cool
of her to do.

- He was like, "(BLEEP) Chelsea.

All she does
is talk sh-- anyway."

- Oh, boy.

- "She, like, lives
some fake life on Instagram."

- Jesus.

So you're kind of like...
- I'm not here saying that--

- You've had it up to here
with Austen.

- Yeah.

I've never mentioned Austen
to my--

to Nick, to my boyfriend.

So it's odd to me
that he's talking about

his ex to his girlfriend.

And then his girlfriend
tells his ex, which is great.

[laughs]

- It looks really good, Chelsea.

- I know you like it
kind of messy and not fixed.

- Yeah.

All right.

I am going to

set the world on fire
with this cut.

I should probably
be more humble.

[upbeat jazzy music]

♪ ♪

- Okay.
[tsking]

[soft music]

[baby cries softly]

[tsks]

[sighs]
Oh, Lord.

I am really drowning

in being home all day
with my child.

[baby crying]

There are some women
who flourish in this.

P-P!

Aren't you sleepy?

But it is not making me
be the best mom

that I can be, being at home.

That sounds awful,
but I don't care.

How's my girl?
Huh?

[exhales] Ooh.

I know you're hungry.

Here.

There you go.

You're not hungry?

Aww.
[baby cries]

Here.
[gasps] Look.

Shh.

Oh, come on!

Please, don't you want to eat?

Look, look.

Oh, God, okay.

You need to eat.
You need to eat.

You gotta eat, little P.

Here, you play
in your little cage

while Mommy makes
a phone call, okay?

[baby crying]

I feel like this is
a lesson being presented

in front of me by God.

Like, you have to learn
to let go of some control

and allow someone to help you
with your baby.

Let's try to eat
one more time, okay?

[baby babbling]

I need a nanny, but it
literally keeps me up at night,

worrying about this.

[dramatic musical flourish]

"Is she gonna do this right?
Is she gonna--

"is she gonna put
her diaper on too tight?

"Is she gonna cut her food
in too big of bites?

And then she's gonna choke,
and she's not gonna know

"how to do
the Heimlich maneuver,

"and then she's not
gonna know how to

open the gates
for the ambulance."

I mean, these are the things
that I think about.

And it's truly nuts.

[baby fussing]
Aww.

Please?

Look.
There you go.

[exhales] Okay.

Coming up...

- I'm trying to pack
for this trip,

and I don't know what to bring.

- Oh.

[funky upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Tyson!

[whistles]

Are you mad 'cause I'm packing?
You know I'm leaving you?

Come on.
Come on.

[soft jazzy music]

♪ ♪

[line trilling]

- The mailbox is full
and cannot accept

any messages at this time.

Goodbye.
- Bye.

[phone taps]
Okay.

- Hi.
- Hi, um.

Okay, I'm trying to pack
for this trip,

and I don't know what to bring.

- Oh, no.

- Oh, no!

- Oh, no, not again!

Have you heard from Kathryn
by any chance?

'Cause she isn't picking up
any phone calls.

- Okay, today's Thursday.

[both knocking]

Kathryn, it's Danni and Naomi.
Open the door.

I thought she was in Miami,
but was come--

was gonna be back
well before the trip.

- [stammers]
You're asking the wrong person.

- Okay.

[line trilling]

- Hey.

- Well, I just called Kathryn

to kind of see
what the game plan was

and her voice mailbox
was full, so.

- Are we hunting or are we
painting each other's nails?

- Hmm.

- [soft groan]

- Nothing actually went on.

I literally just
shut off the world.

- Kathryn.
I swear to God,

I did not know
if you were alive.

I think it is hard
for a lot of people

to be friends with Kathryn.

She really doesn't
hold herself accountable.

But it would be so much simpler
if you would communicate.

- I mean, if she's
not texting you back,

she's not gonna text me back.
But...

We just need to know
if we need to pack, you know,

like, Uggs or stilettos.

It's very simple.

So simple.

[soft dramatic music]

- You really did.

- [sighs]

- What if we don't
hear from her?

Are we still going?

- Yeah, we gotta--
we gotta stick to that plan.

All right.

- Okay, I'll talk to you later.

- All right, well,
just keep me posted

if you hear from her.

Now I'm--I can't help
but be anxious about it.

[suspenseful music]

[car door opens, shuts]

♪ ♪

- [soft mutter]

Oh, sh--, there's mail.

[punchy music]

♪ ♪

"Lost orange and white
Persian cat."

[snorts]
What in the world?

Home.

For a day.

[exhales]

[soft chuckle]

All right.

[phone chiming]

[soft laugh]

What up?

- What's the French toast?

I--

- I've been in New York,

and then I was in Miami,
and now I'm home.

- Oh, good God.
Please don't tell me

they're making a big ----ing
deal out of this.

- No one's called me, Danni!

- No one has--you've called me.
That is it.

So don't make this a big thing.

You have called me.
That is it.

I set concrete plans
that were very, very clear.

I'm planning this girls trip
to Bolt-tree Farmhouse.

I think that's
what it's called.

Or Bolt Farm Treehouse,
something like that anyways.

- Well, good.
I'll keep you updated

on, like, details, I suppose.

I have no idea why

this has become,
one, even an issue,

and, two, if you're asking me
what should I pack or wear?

Come on.
Come on, look on Pinterest.

- I think that we're all
just gonna ride together.

- So I'll let
all the other girls know.

And I will talk to you tomorrow.

- All right, bye.

- Coming up...

- Did y'all know
that some people

put gummy bears up their butt?

- What?
- Yeah.

- I don't understand why anybody
puts anything up their butt,

including a wiener.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Buyer's guide.

That's a lot of paperwork
for a first car, dang.

Good Lord.

[knocking on door]

Hi.
- This is so amazing.

- Aww, thanks.

- How you doing?
You look cute.

- Thank you.
- [gasps] I mean...

- Yeah, come on in,
and check it out.

- Girl, this is gorgeous.

How many levels, four?
- It's four.

- I have learned
over the years

with Kathryn,
the best thing you can do

is not try to meddle
in her business.

She inevitably
always resurfaces.

And at this point,
I'm not even concerned about it.

[knocking on door]

God.
- [startles]

- Hello?
- That was so loud.

- Hi.
Sorry, I did not...

- No, you're fine.
- Did not mean to be that loud.

- Hello. Come on.
- Oh, my gosh, this is amazing.

Hi.
- How you doing?

- Good. How are you?
- You look good.

- Kathryn as a friend,
in a nutshell,

is texting her
and not always knowing

you're gonna get a text back;

making plans and not knowing
if she's gonna show up.

Does Thomas have the kids
this week?

- I actually do.
- [soft gasp]

- Yeah. My mom's
gonna watch 'em tonight.

- But I don't want to
piss Kathryn off.

I don't want her
to be mad at us.

So I'm just gonna avoid.

[knocking on door]
- [startles]

- Oh, God!
That thing is so terrifying.

- Hey.
- What's up?

Girl, you living large!

- Isn't it a good feeling?
- It is.

[knocking on door]
[startles] Oh, my God.

- Hey.
- Yo.

- [laughs] Hey, girl.
- Hey, boo.

- What's up?
- Hey.

- The whole gang's here now.
- Hey, DB.

- Y'all ready to get going?
- I'm so excited to be going.

- [soft grunt]
- Okay.

- I'm excited to host y'all.

- I say we all just start
fartin' and burpin'.

- You got room, Kat?
- Oh, yeah, I'm good.

- All right, bitches,
you ready to ride?

[soft jazzy music]

- So what's on the agenda
once we get there?

- We're gonna
go to this vineyard

near the treehouses.

- That's awesome.

- And then after the vineyard,
we're having dinner.

But I want us to relax
the whole time.

- Cool.
- Does anybody want any candy?

I brought gummy bears.
- I have some gummy bears.

- It's essential.

- Did y'all know
that some people

put gummy bears up their butt?

all: Why?

- I don't know.
- For instant satisfaction.

- I don't understand why...
- Who told you that?

- Anybody puts anything
up their butt,

including a wiener.

- I'm not into that stuff.

- People chug alcohol
through their butt.

- Yeah, it's called
butt-chugging.

- What?
- Yeah.

- Eww.
Oh, my God.

- It's like a fetish.
- I can't.

- You can look it up.

Don't Google it, actually,

because you cannot un-see that.

- So where'd you just fly in
from, Kathryn?

- Um, I got back from New York
yesterday morning.

- How was it?
- It was great.

I really, really like it a lot.

- How long have you
been seeing this guy?

- Two months, maybe.

- Okay, so if y'all
fall in love and get married,

is he gonna move here?

- Well, uh, we've discussed
somewhat of the potential.

[cymbal shimmers]

- Wait, hold on, rewind.

[tape rewinding]

- He, um, is retiring then
to the private sector

for a law firm
that's in Florida, right?

And they want to open up
an office in Charleston.

- Wow.
- Yes.

- That's serious.
- Yeah.

This is like the first time
that I actually feel,

you know, giddy and excited
about someone

since, I guess, I met Thomas.

And I really, truly
like the fact that

he actually won the senate seat,
'cause I thought it was

gonna be a little bit of
a "(BLEEP) you" to Thomas.

- "Limehouse Paint & Body."

- Oh, Lord.
- [laughs]

[upbeat jazzy music]

♪ ♪

- Look who is it.

- I didn't get
the English countryside memo

on the outfit.

- We didn't get the Kesha memo
on the outfit.

- You're gonna get
the mosquito amendment.

- I brought a sweater.

God, I am getting
chewed already, but

this is my favorite place
on the entire Earth.

Airy Hall Plantation
is where I grew up.

It's been in my family
my whole life.

It's about an hour south
of Charleston.

It's on the Ashepoo River.

My horses have
always been there.

And we play polo out there.

My family has
every single holiday there.

It's home.
That's where my heart is.

- When was the last time
you went fishing, Eliza?

- When I was like seven.
- Well.

- Well, it's great for stress.
- [soft laugh]

- When I was Dad's bestie.

- If there's one thing we got,
it's plenty of stress.

- Yep, we do.

Growing up, my dad was
one of my idols.

And, you know,
we were like this.

But after the affair,

I didn't talk to my dad for...

um, almost a year.

- You know what a redfish is,
Lizzy?

- Yes.
Well, not really.

No.
- [chuckles]

- We went from being
this perfect, well-known family

to broken apart.

Like...
- There you go.

- All right, perfect.
- Whoo!

And I just wanted to, like,

[exhales]
pull the sheets up

and just, like, hide.

Ooh, ooh, ooh.
- Got it, reel, reel, reel!

- You got one, you got one,
you got one, you got one.

Pull it!
- I'm pulling, I'm--

- Oh! Yeah!
- You got a redfish.

- Whoo-hoo!
- A redfish.

- I've forgiven him, but

it's never gonna be
like it was.

We have scars, you know?

[somber music]

He does too.

Bite the fish.
- That's a good red right there.

- Good job.
- Pick him up.

- Okay, pretend like
you're having fun.

Ah, beautiful, beautiful.

- Are you gonna eat it?
- Yeah. Very cool.

- Slimy.
- I'ma walk down to the dock

down here.
- Okay.

- Ah, these bugs.
I'm getting annihilated.

- How you--how are you feeling
after what happened?

- Cheating death is the weirdest
feeling I have ever felt.

I was invited to go
on a trip to the Bahamas

with a man I've been dating
named Don.

And we were going on
his friend's private plane.

We were on the way there,
but he forgot his passport.

So he calls his friend
and he's like,

"Y'all go without us.
Like, we don't want to

make you miss your trip."

I was ticked.

Then later in the day,
he was like,

"The plane crashed.
It's gone."

Makes you appreciate your life
1 million times more.

- Well, that makes me
appreciate you.

I couldn't live without you.

- It also has made me
really think about

people I surround myself with.

Like, if I died today,
I want to have

good relationships with
everyone.

You know, I just feel, like,
not as welcome since the affair.

- Let's try to...
- Okay.

- To be positive-energy
type people.

And if that works, great.

If it doesn't work,
then get new friends.

- [soft laugh] Thank you.
- [chuckles]

- Free advice.

- But I love you.
Come here and give me a hug.

both: I love you.

- I'm so--so happy
you're still here.

I love you so much.

- Coming up...

What is Whitney like?

Did he get fully nude?

- He kept his glasses on.

[screams and laughter]

[upbeat bluegrass music]

♪ ♪

- Y'all, we are, like, out.
- [laughs]

- How pretty!
- So this is supposed to be

like, 40 acres of land.

- I feel like
we're pulling into, like,

"Robin Hood:
Prince of Thieves."

- I was gonna say
"Blair Witch Project."

- No!
- Oh, (BLEEP)!

- Y'all, this does kind of
freak me out though.

- Stop.
- I'm just saying.

We're out in the middle
of nowhere,

and nobody would hear us scream.

[brooding music]

- Wow, it's pretty back here.

- Hi.
- Hey.

- This is beautiful.

- Welcome to Bolt Farm
Treehouse.

- This is so cool.
- This is great.

- We have y'all set up
in two treehouses.

This is the
Living Room Treehouse,

and we have the Wildflower
Treehouse just down the way.

After you get settled in,
we have transportation for you

to go to Deep Water Vineyard.

And then you'll come back here,
and Logan will help

get dinner ready
inside the Honeymoon Treehouse.

- Awesome.
- Do you want to check it out?

- Yeah.
- Okay, bye!

[laughter]

- I've never been
in a treehouse.

- Go ahead.
- Yeah, make yourself at home.

- [gasps]
Oh, my gosh!

It looks like something
out of, like, a fairy tale.

- Oh, my God.

Y'all, this is perfect.
- I mean, this is beyond.

- I feel like I came out of,
like, Pinterest right now.

- This is amazing.
- Thank you.

- [gasps] Oh, my God!

- Do you want to see
the Wildflower Treehouse?

- Yeah.
- Okay.

[dainty music]

- There's an avenue of oak trees

that's covered in moss
over here,

but they're several hundred
years old.

- oh, my God.
How pretty.

Lookit, look how you can
see the flowers.

- So cool.

- This one has a more like...
- Ooh!

- Wild, spirited,
adventurous feel.

- Y'all, this is so perfect.
- Look!

- Oh, my gosh, that is amazing.

- I want those
for my kitchen window.

- Don't they look--
they stained glass in that?

- These things are cool as sh--.

- Well, we'll let you guys
get settled.

- Yeah.
- Sounds good.

- Make yourself at home.
- This is incredible.

- I know, how are we gonna pick?

- I'm happy wherever
y'all put me.

- Kathryn, you pick first.
- Yeah, Kathryn.

- 'Cause this was your idea, so
which place do you like better?

- I want this one, honestly.

- I was gonna say,
this looks like your style.

- I'll stay at the other one.
- Well, actually I prefer--

I'll stay in the other one.
- I'll stay in here.

- I'll stay in here.
So should we go get our stuff?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- Let's unload.
- [grunting]

[soft upbeat music]

- Let's pop that Moet.

- I feel like this is so
romantic for all three of us.

Y'all, a round bed,
this has been my dream

ever since "MTV Cribs"
with Michael Jordan.

- It's too much pressure.
I have to let it go.

[cork pops]
- Oh!

- Oh, sorry,
that was uneventful.

- I'm excited to try this wine.

- I don't know what a vineyard
is like, to be honest with you.

- Is it wrong of us
to drink around Kathryn?

Like, is that rude?

- I mean, it's her idea
to go to a vineyard.

- I know.
- And we're not all

getting, like,
freaking hammered.

- Hey, speak for yourself,
sister.

- [soft laugh]
- I'm getting tanked.

- Hold on, y'all, I'm gonna
put on a different shirt.

Sorry, y'all.
Look for another T-shirt.

Y'all can go if you want.

- Yeah.
- [sighs] Jeez.

- It's so weird
to think that I, like,

don't have to worry about Palmer
right now.

- Who's watching her?
- My mom.

- Oh, well, she's on it.
- I can tell her what to do.

- She raised you,
and look at you.

- Yeah, look at me.
[soft chuckle]

Oh, man.

- It's like we're at
adult summer camp a little bit.

- Yes.
- But adult fall camp.

- I could seriously
just go to sleep right now.

- Hey.
- Hey, ladies.

Y'all ready to
go to this vineyard?

- Okay.
- Wake up, mama bear.

- I'm ready.
- Okay.

- Yeah, let's go.
- Come on, girl.

- All right.
- I should've changed clothes.

What the (BLEEP) am I wearing?

- Am I sitting in the front?
- Okay.

- Y'all excited?
- Yes.

- I'm, like, very ready
for a glass of wine.

[upbeat bluegrass music]

- [laughs]

Look how pretty
those trees are.

I don't think I like rose.

- "Rosé"?
- Rosé.

[laughter]

- Oh, this is beautiful.
- This is gorgeous.

- "Deep Water."

- Who knew there was
a vineyard out here?

[elegant bluegrass music]

- Retha? Kathryn.
- So happy to have you.

- Nice to see you.
- Hi!

- Just have a seat.
- Alrighty.

♪ ♪

- Well, we are so delighted
to have you all

on this rather
liquid sunshine day.

But on days like this,
when it rains, we pour.

- Oh, I like it!
- You're good.

- The only grape
that we can grow here

is that old Southern favorite,
the muscadine.

So we're going to start
with Magnolia.

It's a little bit
like a Riesling.

- Oh, I like Riesling a lot.

- You can spit.
- It can be chilled also.

Nicely chilled
on a really hot day,

I think it's really nice.

- [smacking lips] Okay.

- So let's go to
Deep Water Blend.

It can be chill--
- Oh, I don't--I'm okay.

- Okay.
- Sorry.

- It tastes a lot better
than they smell.

- [chuckles]
I've heard that before.

- Do you have any
non-alcoholic wine by chance?

- I have some muscadine juice.

- All right.
- Oh, cool.

- Which is absolutely delicious.

- Cheers, y'all.
I'm excited now.

[soft laughter]

- Oh, Lord.
- Oh, that is sweet.

- All right, well,
you're welcome to have

anything that you would like.

all: Thank you.

- Thanks, Retha.
- You're welcome.

[phone chimes]

- Y'all, Whitney just texted me.
- Whitney?

- He said, "Yo, where you at?"

- Wait, is Whitney
trying to holler?

- Apparently, yeah.
- Like, booty call?

- [gasps]
- [groans]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Hi, welcome to Tidal Grounds.

- First time here.
- Welcome.

- It's cool.
- Thanks.

- Um, I'm the guy who's ordering
the pumpkin spice latte.

- What size would you like?
- Medium's fine.

- Medium?
- Ice, please.

That is all for now.
- Perfect.

- Okay.

Yeah, big guy.
- Oh, yeah.

Yeah, way--that feels good.
- Look at you.

You got a full serving.

- It's a ----ing
French press, bro.

- Oh, maybe I'll get a cup.

- Get a pot, man.

I don't--don't want you
hitting off my sh--.

- I might have a--
just a little bit.

Pumpkin spice.
- Thank you very much.

- Enjoy.
- Okay.

- Yeah.
- Anyway.

How you doing?

- [sighs] I don't know.

I'm kind of, uh,
waiting to see--

Smoochie is not in good shape.

- It just sucks.
- Yeah.

She can't walk.

It's ----ing heartbreaking,
dude.

- Jesus.
- She has a tumor.

And probably I'll have to...
- Put her out.

- Let her exit this world in a--
- Yeah.

She had a good life.
- Very good.

I mean, look, she's been
with me for 13 years.

- Wow.
Your longest relationship ever.

- Well then, my mom...

Only woman that hasn't
let me down.

[both laugh]

- What is Whitney like?

- [laughs]
- Oh, no-no-no, no-no-no.

- Was Whitney jealous
of your man?

- I want to know.
- Mm-mm.

- Adult.
- What is Whitney like?

How many rounds?

- [scoffs] One.

[laughter]

- Was it real passionate?
- No.

- Was there any noises
that he makes?

- Yeah, what...
- [groans]

- Y'all, I'm not going there.

- Did he get fully nude?

- He kept his glasses on.

[screams and laughter]

- Coming up...

- Kathryn, why were you MIA
this week?

[dramatic music]

- I'm just living
my ----ing life, man.

[upbeat bluegrass music]

♪ ♪

- All right, ladies.

- Back at camp, y'all.
So dinner's at 7:30.

We have an hour and a half
to, like, chill.

- Kay.
- All right.

We'll see y'all in a little bit.
- Okay.

♪ ♪

- [sighs] Okay.

All right, I've gotta
go to the bathroom.

- I'm gonna
make us some guacamole.

- Okay.

[upbeat country music]

♪ ♪

- Oh, my gosh,
it smells like campfire.

- Incense, look--
doesn't it look a little hazy?

- This is so pretty.
- I know.

♪ ♪

- I feel like I never
take the chance to, like,

look up at the sky enough,
you know?

- [soft laugh]

- [mouth full] I feel like we
shouldn't be eating in this bed.

- I know.

But we're on vacation.

- I'm gonna check on little P.

[chips crunching]

Not working.

What do you do if
you have an emergency out here?

- My text messages
aren't even going through.

- My aren't either--
I have no service.

One thing that
makes me nervous, like,

what if they needed
to get in touch with me?

I gotta stop overthinking.
- Yeah, don't think like that.

They're fine.
Jason's a freaking doctor like--

- I know, that's what
I tell myself.

- Yeah.

- But he still
does not do things

as good as I do them.

[pensive music]

And you know Kathryn, like,
this is an issue in general.

- It's just not normal behavior,
and she gets a pass every time.

But at what point is it
you just don't give a sh--

about your friends sometimes,
you know what I'm saying?

That there is a line
between that.

And a friendship is
a two-way street.

- It's gotta--
the conversation has to be had.

It has to be had tonight.

I just, like--we gotta look for
the right opportunity for

it to happen, because I don't
want it to be counterproductive.

- Exactly, so we need to
tell her

and hope that she can
see where we're coming from.

- Yeah.
- "You cannot do this."

[doorknob rattles]
[door creaks]

- Hey.
- Hello.

- Hey, boo-boo.
- I just went and checked out

the little place where
we're eating.

And it's so cute.
- Yeah, this'll be good.

- Yes, ma'am.

[thunder cracks]
[rain pattering]

- Okay, we're gonna run.

- Oh, sh--, I can't see.

Oh, this is gonna be slippery.

- Oh, a little sprinkle.
- Don't bust your butt.

- Ooh!

Oh, wow.
How beautiful is this?

- So pretty.

- Oh, man, not wearing
a sports bra.

[both laugh]

- Oh, my God,
is it coming down heavier?

- Welcome!
- Run, run.

- This is nice.
- Isn't this so cute?

- How did you not get wet?
- We did.

- Did y'all make it
before the rain?

both: No.
- We ran in the rain.

All right, here's waters
for everyone.

- I'm a little bit winded.

- What's up, Logan?
- Hi, guys, how are y'all?

Hold on, let me get you guys
some drinks.

You guys want some wine?
- Do you have pinot noir?

- Uh, I've got some
muscadine wine

from the Deep Water Vineyard.

♪ ♪

- Sounds good.
- Yeah?

- Let's go for it.
- You tasted that earlier?

- Yeah, that was
part of our wine tasting.

- [soft laugh] Nice.
- Yeah, cool.

- Cheers to being badass women.
- Yes.

To all having wonderful men
but not needing them.

- Ooh!

Okay.
- Wait, I do need Jason though.

- Yeah, I was gonna say, like--
- I, like, really need Nick.

I don't know what I would do.

- I'm so hungry.
I'm so excited about this.

Thank you.
- Yeah, you're welcome.

- Look at
the cute little plates.

- You guys enjoy.
Thank you.

- Oh, this is a crab cake.

This is gonna taste so yummy.
- Mm-hmm.

- Mmm!
- It's good.

Have you and Metul
been in a fight yet?

- I mean, we've gotten into,
like, one fight,

but it was really just
me fighting

and him being like,
"Just chill."

And--and I'm like,
goddamn it,

like, let me be crazy!

'Cause that's just
what I'm used to doing.

You're a ----ing liar.

- You can keep
going around ----ing

burning all these bridges
and being mean to people.

- Burning bridges? I don't give
a (BLEEP) about that bridge.

- What about my bridge?
- Also don't give a sh--

about that either.
- Yeah, it's very clear.

- It's like every
relationship you're in, like...

- Mm-hmm.
- You learn something from.

- Yeah.

When was your first fight
with Jason?

- Have y'all ever had a fight?
- Yes!

Oh, my God, it's always me.
- But is it like--

- But you know what's
different about Jason,

how I knew he was the one?

He has never ever put me down.
Ever.

Not even in the slightest way.

That's when you have--
you know, you have a good man.

- I seem to have to always
learn it the hard way though.

Always learn it the hard way.
Like, the hardest way.

- You created all this bullsh--.

- Don't be a--
you need to calm down.

- I been putting up with
this sh-- for two years.

- What is wrong with you?

- Kathryn, tell us more
about Joe.

- He's really kind.

He's, like, Sicilian,
like, Italian.

So he calls me, like, "baby,"
like, "Hey, baby."

You know what I mean?
- What?

- Just like Whitney.
- It's different.

Ugh.

- It's not at all
what I was imagining.

- No, I know.
- "Hey, baby."

- He works out a lot.
Like...

- Really?

- But, um, he's a good person.

He's--I think, yeah.

I want y'all to meet him.
He's gonna be in town next week.

- Yeah, we'll be cool.
- Yeah.

- We'll meet him.
For sure, we'll be relaxed.

- That was so uncool
the way you said that.

- No, we'll be fine.
- [laughs]

- Like, I'll--I'll act fine.
I don't know about y'all.

[soft laugh] But...

- Hey, guys, here's
the main course for you guys.

Got some quail for you.

- Dang, quail.
- Oh, my gosh.

- Nice.

- Thanks, Logan.

- You guys need
anything else right now?

- Think we're good.
- You're good?

- Thank you. This looks great.
- Awesome. You guys enjoy.

both: Thank you.
- Yeah.

[soft music]

♪ ♪

- Okay, so I just
want to know more about Joe.

[dramatic sting]

[tense music]

- There's something, like,

special, I guess, between us,
I feel.

- What?

- I really don't know
how to explain it.

Something just clicks.

- You're at ease--like, you're
at ease around each other?

- Yeah, like, when we hang out,

it's really easy
to be around him.

And he wants me to
be successful in my own right

and stuff, you know?

He, like, encourages me
to be more proactive.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[tense music]

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

- I went to a charity event
in New York.

And then missed my flight
back to Charleston.

So I just took one to Miami,
stayed there.

- Can I be honest?

You know how protective
I am of you.

Sorry, I just have to say it.

♪ ♪

You have built so much

for yourself in
the last couple months,

and you're self-sabotaging
right now.

Because...
- How am I self-sabotaging?

What?
- You left town for a week.

- I wasn't gone a week
at all, no.

- Okay, you were gone five days,
whatever.

But, like,
you weren't responsive.

And we all thought you were
gonna be back

Saturday or Sunday.

- Okay, but I wasn't...
- Why?

- Because I chose to
go to Miami.

- Why'd you choose?

'Cause you had
a prior engagement.

- 'Cause I had no reason
to be back.

- That's not true.
We both know that.

- What was my prior engagement?

- Kathryn, it's not--
I'm not doing tit-for-tat.

- I don't know what else
you want me to say.

I'm not self-sabotaging,

and I worked really ----ing hard
to get here.

And I don't like feeling
attacked in the sense of, like,

oh, everything's crumbling apart
because I took a trip to Miami.

- I'm not saying that.
I'm not saying that at all.

- No one--no one thinks that.

- I jus--I don't know.
I'm just worried,

because you've changed
in the last month.

Your per--your--
- Really?

- Yes.
I--I feel like,

your personality has been
a little bit testy.

And the only thing that
I can equate to it

is the fact that
you're seeing this guy.

And I know
your pattern of behavior,

and I know when you start to,
like, avoid, avoid, avoid.

- I'm not avoiding anything.

I'm just living
my ----ing life, man.

I don't know.

- Look, okay,
I'm gonna be honest.

You are 27--
you're only 27,

and you've been through
some sh-- that

no normal person should ever
have to ----ing go through.

And you've had to deal with
these situations that

are so just so chaotic that

you haven't been
held accountable

for just, like, day-to-day.

You need to work on time.
Meet me here at 5:00.

That doesn't mean 6:00.

Simple things you just
haven't had to deal with.

And I just feel like--
I don't know.

I mean, does--

- The reason I'm late
is because I spent three years

moving from house to house
with no structure at all,

have dealt with
severe depression.

And getting my life
in an organized fashion

is literally retraining
myself to be able to do that.

- I 100--I get it.

- I've been living with
my parents.

I've been going through custody.

Like, I don't have structure.
So, you're right...

- The rest of the world
does though, Kathryn.

- But I'm--I'm getting there.

- So I just want to give you...
- Can I just finish?

- The expectation of
everybody else.

- I understand.

And it's not like
I do it on purpose.

It's not out of disrespect.
- I know you don't.

- I'm ----ing working my ass off

to get all my sh-- together,
y'all.

- I know, Kathryn, I know, but--
- Like, I'm sorry--

- But, Kathryn, so is
everyone else in the world.

- Yeah, everybody can say that.
- Like, everyone has a battle.

You know what I'm saying?
- I'm not saying like

it's an excuse.
- I'm not attacking you.

- It's a fault of mine, yes.

I have an issue with it, but

I'm trying my best
to get to a point where

I can handle
all the sh-- going on

and be places on time.

If you have pointers,
I will love them,

because I'm Googling
on Pinterest,

"How to organize time better."
"How to be a morning person."

No joke.
I'm legit doing my best.

- I think Kathryn's probably
under more stress

than she's ever been
in her entire life.

But at some point,

you gotta pull up
your big-girl panties

and, you know,
quit making excuses.

- I think we just
want to make sure that

you're making sound decisions.

[plate squeaks]

But I have to say this, because
this has been bothering me.

Like, apparently you bought,
like,

a very new, expensive car.

And--and that, to me,
as your friend, like,

I would not be a friend to you
if I didn't tell you that

I thought that was very--
a very foolish thing to do.

And I just want
to make sure that

you just think
through things do.

- I'm definitely
thinking things through.

And--it's not--
I'm not even going into it.

- No, and--and
you don't have to.

I just--I guess,
I want you to know, like,

- She's saying
what the perception is.

- What the perception is.

The perception is very, very
not great.

And as your friend,
I'm telling you to your face.

- That's fine.

[suspenseful music]

What I do with my money
is my business.

I don't ask Naomie
how she funded her business.

I don't ask Chelsea how she
just renovated an entire home.

I mean, I just don't ask
these people these questions

'cause it's of no concern.

- You have to understand

from an outsider,
what it looks like.

- Ay-yi-yi-yi-yi.
- You have to think about the--

- But, like, why should I care

what it looks like
to other people?

- Because it affects
your future.

- Y'all are my friends,
like, this is like--

- I know, but
we're your friends.

- Y'all know I'm not crazy.

- Kathryn, I don't want you--
I can sense that

you're feeling attacked
and stuff,

and I just want you to know
that it not at all

the place that
we're coming from.

And if you say that you're fine
and you feel good and stuff,

then that's--that's all--
that's the only answer

that we need.

- Okay.

- ♪ Ba-ba-doo ♪

♪ Ba-ba dee-ee-ee ♪

- This has gotten
significantly awkward.

- ♪ It's easy ♪

♪ As the birds and the bees
and the one, two, threes ♪

[music broods]

- On the next episode
of "Southern Charm"...

- That is such a betrayal
by Madison to ----ing

send a private message
between you and your boyfriend.

- I don't know what's worse,
cheating on you,

or doing something like that.

- She's diabolical.

- Do you think
you sabotage relationships?

Do you do something

that you know is
gonna make it go haywire?

- Okay, yes.

- If he goes to jail,
I'll be a single mom.

It's just, like, overwhelming,
'cause it's--

like, the court date's
getting sooner.

- Craig, what are we doing here?

I thought we were having,
like, a slumber party.

- Well, I was
inviting you guys here

to trick you into helping me
fill orders.

- Fill orders?
- What?

As labor?
- Free labor!

- Why are you talking about me
to your girlfriend?

- I--that was a drunken...
- Drunk?

Take your drunken whatever
and shove it up your ass.

- I've been a great ----ing
friend to you, so (BLEEP) off

right now,
I'm not even talking to you.

- You're a ----ing joke
right now, sorry.

- Why are you being a douche?

- She's a ---ing child, man.

[dramatic musical flourish]

- For more "Southern Charm,"
go to bravotv.com.