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COUGHS
2
00:00:12,741 --> 00:00:14,119
I before E.
3
00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:15,560
COUGHS
4
00:00:15,561 --> 00:00:17,000
Except after C.
5
00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:16,999
Sorry, I've got an awful cough!
6
00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:18,140
FORCED LAUGH
7
00:00:18,141 --> 00:00:19,280
Shh!
8
00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:23,199
What on earth?!
9
00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:26,720
The library is open!
10
00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:31,639
Class K, this is unacceptable.
11
00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:34,559
The only thing
I can't accept is that dandruff.
12
00:00:34,560 --> 00:00:38,239
You've got a whole generation
of snowflakes on them shoulders.
13
00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:39,759
How dare you!
14
00:00:39,760 --> 00:00:43,839
How dare you, with that
lemon and herb energy!
15
00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:45,599
Now, look...
16
00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:48,680
What perfume you wearing?
Eau De unseasoned chicken?!
17
00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:53,039
At least you're
doing your bit for the environment,
18
00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:56,199
because those bags
under your eyes are for life.
19
00:00:56,200 --> 00:01:00,759
Madam, might I suggest, "jack-at
po-tah-toh" to go with that...
20
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:01,880
GAGS
21
00:01:01,881 --> 00:01:02,999
..tuna and mayo breath!
22
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:05,518
Don't think it's her breath, fam.
23
00:01:05,519 --> 00:01:08,280
You know what they say,
plenty more fish in the V.
24
00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:13,639
And that's that. On period.
ALL: Period!
25
00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:15,839
Are you out of your tiny minds?!
26
00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:18,439
It ain't personal,
it's a reading exam,
27
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:21,279
and you just got
read like on Drag Race.
28
00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:23,959
Sir's been prepping us all term.
29
00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:26,839
No, literacy as in
reading and writing.
30
00:01:26,840 --> 00:01:30,359
Books, analysis, critical thinking.
31
00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:31,959
Excuse me!
32
00:01:31,960 --> 00:01:33,879
Sir! OK, Miss Gorrel.
33
00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:36,719
Now look what you've done!
Oh, wait, I'm so sorry!
34
00:01:36,720 --> 00:01:39,599
No, but, sorry, that was unreal,
I'm so proud of you all!
35
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:43,319
Oh, shit, sir, if I fail another
exam, my mum is going to kill you.
36
00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:47,919
Oh, don't worry, just tell her
education isn't about the
destination, it's about the journey.
37
00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:49,639
I said, she'll kill YOU!
38
00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:52,320
Who else do you think our
parents are going to blame?
39
00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:55,919
NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE
40
00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:57,719
What I will say is...
41
00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:59,519
NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE
42
00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:01,439
Whatever!
43
00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:03,760
NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE
44
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:08,639
Enough!
45
00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:13,999
Oh, my God!
46
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:15,600
Miss Hoburn, wait!
47
00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:23,360
♪ Yeah, proper tings
48
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,799
♪ Original style
49
00:02:38,800 --> 00:02:40,078
♪ We come to kick the drum
50
00:02:40,079 --> 00:02:42,640
♪ The wicked money spoil, yeah. ♪
51
00:02:48,280 --> 00:02:51,479
Last week, Usma's mum told me,
if her grades slip again,
52
00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:54,479
she's going to soak my cleansing
cloth in chloroform.
53
00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:56,119
Jesus, she actually said that?
54
00:02:56,120 --> 00:02:57,919
Word for word...
55
00:02:57,920 --> 00:02:59,519
..with her eyes!
56
00:02:59,520 --> 00:03:04,199
Whoa! I mean, all the parents are so
savage, I dress straight for them.
57
00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:06,479
Hm? Last parents' evening...
58
00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:08,079
Go on.
59
00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:09,380
SNIFFS
60
00:03:09,381 --> 00:03:10,680
I wore...
61
00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:13,879
..Burton.
62
00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:15,759
You're joking. I'm sorry, mate.
63
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:18,559
Mr Carmichael,
despite my best efforts,
64
00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:21,599
it looks like I'm stuck at this
godforsaken school for the long haul
65
00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:25,559
and now, thanks to you,
we could go into special measures.
66
00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:28,519
Oh, well...
SINGSONG: You're wel-come!
67
00:03:28,520 --> 00:03:31,559
No, special is...
SINGSONG: ba-a-a-ad!
68
00:03:31,560 --> 00:03:35,159
We'll be under constant supervision,
crucified for every tiny mistake
69
00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:38,359
by these, well, apparatchiks.
70
00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:40,440
Mr Harper, what are you doing here?
Eh?
71
00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:43,559
Oh, I just assumed I'd
be in trouble an' all.
72
00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:45,159
You're not "in trouble an' all".
73
00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:48,839
It's Mr Carmichael's
head on the chopping board today.
Go on, shoo! Sweet.
74
00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:52,719
Now, thanks to you, your form are in
danger of failing basic literacy.
75
00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:57,359
So, at 4pm today, Class K will
sit another literacy exam.
76
00:03:57,360 --> 00:04:00,559
Members of the exam board
will stay here today to
77
00:04:00,560 --> 00:04:02,279
observe their preparations.
78
00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:04,999
If any member of staff
tries to help Class K,
79
00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:08,799
it will count as cheating,
an automatic fail. T-ch! T-ch!
80
00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:13,199
I get it, no cheating, no cheating!
Are you still going to
WhatsApp the questions as usual?
81
00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:14,560
- No!
- SHE LAUGHS
82
00:04:14,563 --> 00:04:16,879
No, absolutely not, absolutely...
83
00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:19,119
I don't know what you're
talking about, no.
84
00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:22,999
The exam will take the form of a
spoken presentation, as they are
harder to cheat in.
85
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:26,439
Hm. This decision was taken after
some rather silly concerns were
86
00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:29,919
raised about my own behaviour
in this morning's exam. I mean,
87
00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:34,599
literally ask anyone, ask anyone,
I always... I always carry
88
00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:37,879
a pocket English dictionary in my
pocket. The clue's in the title!
89
00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:42,679
And would the examiners like to tell
us what book the children
are going to be reading?
90
00:04:42,680 --> 00:04:45,199
LOUD THUMP
91
00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:48,999
Oh, yes, good choice,
the plays of great British writer
92
00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:50,319
George Bernard Shaw.
93
00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:52,599
Oh, I'm pretty sure he was Irish.
94
00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:56,839
Don't...
The board would like you to read
George Bernard Shaw's play,
95
00:04:56,840 --> 00:04:59,999
Pygmalion, and then they would
like you to present a critical
96
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:02,319
analysis of said play.
97
00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:06,679
Oh, dear, yes, that is... I think
that's the only copy in the library.
98
00:05:06,680 --> 00:05:09,279
Most of our books are in much better
nick, but I've always got
99
00:05:09,280 --> 00:05:12,039
a thumb in Bernard Shaw.
Well, two thumbs, essentially.
100
00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:15,439
I mean, I probably, if I could,
get a whole fist in the guy!
101
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:16,639
Sorry, Miss? Yes?
102
00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:19,079
Is there any chance
we can read a different play?
103
00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:23,399
Enough, we are going to do this
presentation by the book,
104
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:25,799
or you will all suffer
the consequences.
105
00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:27,359
Give me your phones.
106
00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:29,759
No Google, no TikTok,
107
00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:32,319
no Wikipedia, no ChatGPT.
108
00:05:32,320 --> 00:05:33,640
Come on, man.
109
00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:39,240
Of course.
Guys, get it together!
110
00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:42,520
GULPS
111
00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:45,839
Hey! Oh!
112
00:05:45,840 --> 00:05:46,840
STUTTERS
113
00:05:46,841 --> 00:05:47,841
I'm so stressed.
114
00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:52,399
Whoa, I think I'm having a stroke.
I can smell dog shit!
115
00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:55,359
That's not a symptom of a stroke.
116
00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:59,559
Oh, um, Blessing, actually, I think
that was you, I saw you tread in it
earlier.
117
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:00,960
SCREAMS
118
00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:05,319
What? Jinx, why didn't you tell me?
119
00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:07,679
I didn't want to be a white saviour.
120
00:06:07,680 --> 00:06:11,319
As a reluctantly cishet girl who
goes on two holidays every year,
121
00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:16,279
except for a fortnight in Cornwall,
I am very aware of my blind spots.
122
00:06:16,280 --> 00:06:19,079
Maybe you wanted to tread in it.
123
00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:22,160
Yo, yo, yo, yo, guys...
Guys, she Jinxed it.
124
00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:25,239
I Jinxed it? What's that?
125
00:06:25,240 --> 00:06:26,759
Ah, it's just banter, innit?
126
00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:29,279
It's what you say when someone's
too white to function.
127
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:33,199
As in, me, my, my name...
Who... Who says that?
128
00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:35,359
Oh, just... Just us
and the rest of the school.
129
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:38,158
Pavel... and Edna.
My cousin, my mum.
130
00:06:38,159 --> 00:06:41,119
My parrot said it one time.
My hairdresser, ooh, my nail tech.
131
00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,999
Everyone.
He did, I remember him saying that.
132
00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,158
Yo, wait, Jinx.
133
00:06:46,159 --> 00:06:47,720
WHISTLE
134
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:03,279
WHISTLE
135
00:07:03,280 --> 00:07:05,879
OK, hippos,
who's hungry for more balls?
136
00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:09,399
As I said to the missus last...
Not appropriate.
137
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:12,200
Right, you know what you're doing,
I'll be in me office.
138
00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:14,440
Jinx? Oh. Er...
139
00:07:14,441 --> 00:07:15,639
SNIFFS
140
00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:18,079
Hey, what's the matter?
141
00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:21,719
You see someone drinking
out a plastic cup again?
142
00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:24,159
No, nothing. I'm sorry.
143
00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:25,559
How thick do you think I am?
144
00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:27,199
Come on, you can tell me.
145
00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:29,519
Oh, sir, I don't think you're thick.
146
00:07:29,520 --> 00:07:32,479
I think you're
the product of a broken system.
147
00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:35,519
No, I meant, you can
tell me why you're crying.
148
00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:37,159
Well, go on, I'm a good listener.
149
00:07:40,720 --> 00:07:42,119
RECORD SCRATCH
150
00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:44,759
..and my therapist says I overthink
things, but what child of six isn't
151
00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:47,359
traumatised by the bloodthirsty
consumerism of duck-duck-goose?
152
00:07:47,360 --> 00:07:49,359
And then, when I was 11...
Jinx, Jinx! Jesus!
153
00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:53,319
You worry too much.
Why do you care what people think?
154
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,439
I can't help it.
155
00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:57,839
My first word was "sorry",
and yesterday,
156
00:07:57,840 --> 00:07:59,719
I apologised to my own reflection.
157
00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:02,519
Right, well...
Well, I can help with that.
158
00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:06,479
We've got to toughen you up.
Come on girl, we've got work to do.
159
00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:07,799
SCREAMS
160
00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:11,839
Remember, two legs good,
four legs bad, yeah?
161
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:15,479
If your feet are on the ground,
you're listening, you're involved.
162
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:16,620
Are you listening? Yes.
163
00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:17,759
HORN
164
00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:20,839
No! Never listen!
165
00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:25,159
Further, further... Further.
166
00:08:25,160 --> 00:08:26,840
SCREAMS
167
00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:32,960
Right.
168
00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:37,519
There's one seat left on the train.
169
00:08:37,520 --> 00:08:39,798
Excuse me, elderly lady...
Not that you look elderly,
170
00:08:39,799 --> 00:08:41,120
I'm sure you have a lovely
171
00:08:41,121 --> 00:08:42,440
skin care routine.
172
00:08:39,799 --> 00:08:42,439
HORN
173
00:08:42,440 --> 00:08:46,399
Pardon me, I see that you are with
child, if you'd like to take a seat.
HORN
174
00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:51,039
You're on the Stanstead Express
for a 6am flight to Cork,
what you drinking?
175
00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:52,100
Er... Flat white? Nope.
176
00:08:52,101 --> 00:08:53,159
HORN
177
00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:55,000
- Sorry, oat flat white.
- HORN
178
00:08:55,003 --> 00:08:57,919
Vodka? Nope.
What's wrong with vodka?
179
00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:59,020
It's slimming. Oh!
180
00:08:59,021 --> 00:09:00,119
HORN
181
00:09:00,120 --> 00:09:03,599
COCKNEY-ESQUE ACCENT: Pint of
Guinness and a white wine spritzer
for the lady. Better.
182
00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,559
At the minute, yeah,
you're here, isosceles.
183
00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:09,279
We need more equilateral, yeah?
184
00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:12,759
So I'm talking elbows out,
knees out, neck forward, yeah?
185
00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:14,639
GRUNTS
186
00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:17,159
All right, you win!
187
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:19,479
Oh, wait a minute, what's this?
188
00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:21,559
The clouds have opened,
the sun's come out,
189
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:24,559
it's about to hit nine degrees
Celsius, you got ten seconds
190
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:27,359
to take your top off and start
blaring Pitbull out your phone!
191
00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:30,319
Take my top off?
No, don't do that, actually.
192
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:33,199
Now, this phone cost me 200 quid.
193
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:36,599
It's where I keep the only photos
I have of my late grandmother
194
00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:38,239
and my beautiful baby boy.
195
00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:41,399
Guess what, I ain't backed it up.
196
00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:42,920
Now, what you going to do?
197
00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:46,080
Three, two, one.
198
00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:50,599
Wanker!
199
00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:54,959
Are you Tottenham in disguise?
Brap-brap, oi!
200
00:09:54,960 --> 00:09:56,840
By St George, I think she's got it.
201
00:10:00,080 --> 00:10:02,039
Yo, Detective Pikachu,
go faster, man.
202
00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:05,160
There are thousands of pages.
The man wrote a lot of plays, OK?
203
00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:09,319
Psst! How's it going?
204
00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:11,679
Sir, why are you
dressed like a nurse?
205
00:10:11,680 --> 00:10:14,279
Because Hoburn and that exam woman
are trying stop me from
206
00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:17,119
helping you and this is an
emergency and I'm always on theme.
207
00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:20,759
So don't be coming at me with that
Kourtney and Kim
season 18, episode one energy, OK?
208
00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:23,719
What? Well, we ain't even started
Pygmalion yet.
209
00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:26,239
Sir, why don't you teach us
anything useful?
210
00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:29,599
That concealer application
is looking pretty useful to me,
211
00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:31,999
sis, but I am sorry, OK?
212
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,319
Your parents are going to kill me.
Bruv, I ain't scared of my dad.
213
00:10:35,320 --> 00:10:37,359
If man steps to me,
he's getting whacked.
214
00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:40,440
If he steps towards you, it will
be diagonally, cos he's a bishop.
215
00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:45,119
Huh? It's a chess joke. No? OK.
216
00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:48,359
Don't worry, I got it.
No, you didn't, but, thank you.
217
00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:50,799
Sir, it's calm,
we have Jinx, remember?
218
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,399
She probably knows the play.
219
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,719
Ah, of course, and where is that
little piece of tofu?
220
00:10:55,720 --> 00:10:57,240
Yo, yo, yo.
221
00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:02,079
Ah, she'll know what a Pygmalion is.
That's Tony's juice!
222
00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:04,839
OK, Jemima, it's giving.
223
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:07,119
Giving nothing?
224
00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:10,279
Like your silhouette in that outfit.
225
00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:12,079
OK!
226
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:14,599
Um... Obsessed.
227
00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:19,359
But we kinda need to focus on the
presentation, so, wind your neck in.
228
00:11:19,360 --> 00:11:21,959
Mm... Yeah, the presentation.
229
00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:24,959
I guess you're right about me,
cos I really couldn't give
230
00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:28,279
a shit about it,
or any of you lot for that matter.
231
00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:29,399
Wig.
232
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,479
But the play is probably written
by some dead, old white guy.
233
00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:34,480
Mm, you going to eat those?
234
00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:39,359
Goddamn! Blessing's right.
235
00:11:39,360 --> 00:11:42,919
I bet there's loads about misogyny
and objectifying women in there.
236
00:11:42,920 --> 00:11:47,119
Jinx, you hate that shit.
Nah, drop me out, you melt.
237
00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:50,320
Why are you talking like Mr Harper?
238
00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:55,960
BELL RINGS
239
00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:05,559
Look, I'm telling you lot,
there's a code in the title, right?
240
00:12:05,560 --> 00:12:07,840
Yo, I've rearranged the letters.
241
00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:12,399
Pyg-mal-ion.
242
00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:15,679
Like a pig Iron Man,
olden-day superhero shit.
243
00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:17,079
OK!
244
00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:19,719
There's loads of superhero
stuff in the costume cupboard.
245
00:12:19,720 --> 00:12:23,639
Nah, Pygmalion's that dirty
STI Warren's nan got on that
swingers cruise.
246
00:12:23,640 --> 00:12:27,159
Stop saying that, it wasn't for
swingers, it was for lonely hearts.
247
00:12:27,160 --> 00:12:31,159
Yeah? Why do you think they called
the jacuzzi egg drop soup? Urgh!
248
00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:32,919
Juvenile.
249
00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:36,840
Hey, Jinx. Hey, babe. Hey, bestie.
250
00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:40,919
Come on, Jinx, I know you love
these dry old books.
251
00:12:40,920 --> 00:12:44,679
Before I met you, I thought
period drama was wearing
white jeans on a heavy day.
252
00:12:44,680 --> 00:12:50,399
Oh! Yes! It's the last page, there's
something about a sculpture and a
character called Eliza Doolittle.
253
00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:52,679
Is she pretty? Show me her.
254
00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:54,839
Oh... Forgot it wasn't a phone.
255
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:59,519
OK, so if we all work together,
we can each take one act of the play
and read it for the presentation.
256
00:12:59,520 --> 00:13:01,480
Hey, yo, yo, yo, yo! What is this?
257
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:06,279
I found it stashed in
the dressing-up cupboard.
258
00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:09,039
Hey, it's got
shit about all of yous in it.
259
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:13,479
Oh, my God!
It's a burn book, it's going to
be full of gossip, give me!
260
00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:19,039
Hey, nah, nah, nah, nah. Hey,
listen to this. "Harrison is so
dumb, people do reps with him."
261
00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:22,520
Oh! All right, OK...
262
00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:25,839
Ooh, found one on you!
263
00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:28,799
"Warren's got as much personality
as that bit of water that
264
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:31,519
"builds on out-of-date yoghurts."
265
00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:33,679
Well, well... Oh, oh!
266
00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:36,879
"Inchez's bars are
so soft, people hear them
267
00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:39,359
"and say I can't believe
it's not butter!"
268
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:41,160
Hey, give me that, give me that.
269
00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:48,159
"Usma is so dumb..."
Oh, no! "..she'd try using Bic
Biro on her eyebrow."
270
00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,280
Give me that book!
271
00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:53,680
Ooh...
272
00:13:56,080 --> 00:14:00,039
Oh... "Blessing's breath stinks
so bad,
273
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:03,000
"when she yawns, her teeth duck."
274
00:14:04,840 --> 00:14:05,920
What's up!
275
00:14:05,921 --> 00:14:06,999
LAUGHTER
276
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:08,199
Yeah?
277
00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:11,039
Well, see how you lot
get on without my help.
278
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:12,279
What? Yo...
279
00:14:12,280 --> 00:14:13,599
No, no, no, no, no!
280
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,839
You have to help.
281
00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:17,519
It's fragile, please! Give it to me!
282
00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:18,959
Get off!
283
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:21,040
THEY SHOUT OVER EACH OTHER
284
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:27,399
Jinx, you've got gravy on the book.
285
00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:28,620
Pfft. Ah, shut up!
286
00:14:28,621 --> 00:14:29,839
LAUGHTER
287
00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:31,919
Look, how come there's nothing
about you in there?
288
00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:34,319
Wait. Because she wrote it.
289
00:14:34,320 --> 00:14:37,239
Jinx wrote down all the shit
she's too scared to say
290
00:14:37,240 --> 00:14:38,919
to my immaculate face!
291
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,559
Fine.
292
00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:42,519
Maybe I did write it.
293
00:14:42,520 --> 00:14:46,239
Since I'm such a two-faced bitch.
294
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:47,520
Jesus.
295
00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:52,280
And you owe me a bargain bucket!
296
00:14:54,680 --> 00:14:56,519
Well, that's just brilliant.
297
00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:57,679
The book's ruined.
298
00:14:57,680 --> 00:15:00,399
Bravo! I can't believe I let you all
drag me down to your level.
299
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:02,439
I ain't gonna be where
I'm not appreciated.
300
00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:04,719
I'm Harry-Styling this out
and going solo.
301
00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:06,599
Shapeesh!
302
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:08,599
You're dickheads anyway, man.
303
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,639
Don't touch it - just leave it, OK?
304
00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:14,199
Oh, here you go, mate.
Here you go. Wahey! Wanker!
305
00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:16,999
Oi! What have you done to Jinx?
306
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,999
On the one day I needed her to be
her beggy little self,
307
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:22,079
you've turned her
into a little tramp.
308
00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:24,679
Without her, Class K are screwed.
309
00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:27,319
Yeah. Yeah, I taught that girl
to fart in public.
310
00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:28,439
And you know something?
311
00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:30,359
I've never felt more alive
in my life.
312
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:33,559
Well, I'm glad you feel alive,
because if they fail
313
00:15:33,560 --> 00:15:37,199
this presentation, their parents
are going to kill me!
314
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:39,799
Give me your phone.
The examiner took mine.
315
00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:41,959
Oh. Sorry, mate. She's a write-off.
316
00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:44,759
God! And none of the other teachers
will give me their phones
317
00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:46,039
because they're all snakes.
318
00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:48,239
We're running out of time.
319
00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:50,279
We need to google this play.
320
00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:51,599
We need a phone.
321
00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:54,199
Then we're gonna have to go looking
in the shadows, for the sickos
322
00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:57,439
and the freaks, where no
sane person would ever go.
323
00:15:57,440 --> 00:15:59,279
The library.
324
00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,039
Worse.
325
00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:03,160
Much, much worse.
326
00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:08,040
SHE PLAYS RIFF
327
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:14,639
All right, shaggers?
328
00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:15,839
Life's crap, innit?
329
00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:18,119
Tell you what, anyone fancy
a scream into the abyss?
330
00:16:18,120 --> 00:16:20,679
AMERICAN ACCENT: Hey, oh,
what's that tune you're playing?
331
00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,079
It's, like, so depressing.
332
00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:23,919
How about we prank call
each other's moms
333
00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:25,599
and pretend we've been in
a car accident?
334
00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:26,679
Oh, gnarly!
335
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:28,559
Oi, give us your phone, please.
Five minutes.
336
00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:30,079
Harper, Carmichael.
337
00:16:30,080 --> 00:16:32,959
I do not want to see you
trying to help Class K.
338
00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:35,559
You see, I have a zero-tolerance
policy on cheating.
339
00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:37,279
Now, off you go.
340
00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:38,420
In separate directions.
341
00:16:38,421 --> 00:16:39,560
THEY SIGH
342
00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:42,040
See you later, dude.
343
00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:48,199
Sis, let me use your phone
for two minutes
344
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:49,600
and I'll do your eyebrows.
345
00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:52,759
Why are you laughing?
346
00:16:52,760 --> 00:16:54,000
The burn book.
347
00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:04,720
LAUGHTER ECHOES
348
00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:14,999
Why are you giving these
out to everyone?!
349
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:17,838
I kicked off me Jesus creepers
and threw on some mug boots.
350
00:17:17,839 --> 00:17:20,719
What? It's just a bit of banter.
No big deal.
351
00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:21,838
Here you are, boys.
352
00:17:21,839 --> 00:17:24,559
I should've done this
a long time ago.
353
00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:26,399
Consider yourself unfollowed!
354
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,040
Buh-bye.
355
00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:32,200
Please, can I just borrow
someone's phone very qui...?
356
00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:35,479
Can you just stop laughing!
357
00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:37,239
I need a phone right now.
358
00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:38,920
I need to google Pygmalion.
359
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:46,599
It's not that bad -
it has personality!
360
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,199
You know what? I'm gonna be getting
you lot back for this.
361
00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:50,640
You guys are mean!
362
00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:55,559
Butter? Flour me, man.
363
00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:57,879
That burn book knows
nothing about my music.
364
00:17:57,880 --> 00:17:58,999
Let me use your phone.
365
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,199
Soz, the police are still
holding it in evidence.
366
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,719
That detective has a real
head girl energy.
367
00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:05,159
Yo, what is this?
368
00:18:05,160 --> 00:18:07,919
Miss Hoburn wanted me to organise
a literary tea in honour
369
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:09,679
of the examiner.
370
00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,199
A slice of March Hare.
371
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:14,999
You think it's rabbit but
it's actually pork,
372
00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,199
because nothing is what it seems.
373
00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:19,399
In fact, technically
it's not even pork.
374
00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:22,399
Mistaken - fake bacon.
375
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:23,959
Piggy pop!
376
00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:26,319
Sluiced from the floor
of the abattoir.
377
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:30,079
Wait. If you make me a sculpture
of a pig for this presentation,
378
00:18:30,080 --> 00:18:32,159
I'll let you direct my next
music video.
379
00:18:32,160 --> 00:18:34,039
Oh, I knew you'd see sense!
380
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,119
Just think what you can build
with this stuff.
381
00:18:36,120 --> 00:18:37,999
I just need a pig, Fraser.
382
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:41,039
Just leave it in the playground
before the presentation, yeah?
383
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:44,679
Oh, and those examiners cannot
see you help me. You feel me?
384
00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:45,879
Now?
385
00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:48,399
Why you gotta make
everything weird, fam?
386
00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:49,839
HE TUTS
387
00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:51,519
DANCE MUSIC
388
00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:54,079
Jinx! This has gone too far.
389
00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:56,879
That presentation starts in an hour
and if Class K fail,
390
00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:58,119
everyone suffers.
391
00:18:58,120 --> 00:19:00,199
Oi, Skids, chuck us a coke.
392
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:01,399
Skids?
393
00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:02,639
His name's Mark.
394
00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:04,480
That is quality, to be fair.
395
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:08,360
HORN BLARES
396
00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:11,679
Do you know what, Jinx?
397
00:19:11,680 --> 00:19:14,519
When I first met you I thought,
"What a melt."
398
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:17,239
I don't know if it was your hair,
or the little clips that you
399
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:19,879
put in your hair or them little buns
that you do on your head or...
400
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:22,439
Why is it all hair related?
Look, what I'm saying is,
401
00:19:22,440 --> 00:19:24,279
I'm glad you're happier like this.
402
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:27,879
But I told you to stop worrying -
never told you to stop caring.
403
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,120
You never hang your mates
out to dry, Jinx.
404
00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:34,080
HOOTER
405
00:19:34,081 --> 00:19:35,320
Jesus!
406
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:39,719
I spend my bank holiday
itemising problematic tropes
407
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:42,279
and rap genius, and they call me
Greta-no-mates.
408
00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:45,999
I re-use my pasta water to wash
my hair and they say I stink.
409
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:48,719
If they spent a little less time
being dicks,
410
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:51,999
they'd realise that Pygmalion is
just the film Pretty Woman.
411
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:55,879
Warren's seen it 14 times
with his nan.
412
00:19:55,880 --> 00:19:57,639
Now, if you don't mind,
413
00:19:57,640 --> 00:20:01,120
Skids and I are gonna smash a packet
of Tangfastic to the spit pit.
414
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:09,919
Big mistake, Jinx.
415
00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:11,440
Huge.
416
00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:15,680
Oof. She's called Judith.
417
00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:18,879
Named her after Mother.
418
00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:21,079
Same disappointed look in her eyes.
419
00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:23,559
Cute. Listen, in my defence,
420
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:27,799
I'm feeling very emotional
because, well, I love my kids
421
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:30,999
and that scrubby little English
teacher kept refusing to tell me
422
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,999
what happens in Pygmalion.
423
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,639
So, one thing led to another...
424
00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:38,439
MUSIC: Mathilde
by Scott Walker
425
00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:40,679
♪ Mama, can you hear me yell... ♪
MUFFLED SHOUTS
426
00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:42,959
♪ Your baby boy's
gone back to hell... ♪
427
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,719
Witnesses?
I don't think so. Beginner's luck.
428
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:48,359
So what am I gonna do about
this English teacher?
429
00:20:48,360 --> 00:20:50,199
Hmm. Slippery little suckers.
430
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,399
You could always pay me now
and break the ice.
431
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:54,439
Fraser, why are you quoting
Pretty Woman?
432
00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:56,959
Because Pretty Woman is Pygmalion.
433
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:59,359
Guy meets girl, turns her into
something she's not.
434
00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:01,359
Girl learns to love who she was
before.
435
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:03,359
It's basically
my relationship template.
436
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:05,639
Yes, Fraser! Thank God
you're so bad with women,
437
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:08,279
but how am I gonna tell the kids
with Hoburn watching me?
438
00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:11,559
Leave the English teacher to me.
You just do what you do best.
439
00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:12,959
Karaoke?
440
00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:15,760
MUSIC: Pretty Woman
by Roy Orbison
441
00:21:21,720 --> 00:21:23,320
Oof!
442
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:25,719
OK, I'm dead.
443
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:29,319
♪ Pretty woman,
walkin' down the street
444
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:31,599
♪ Pretty woman,
the kind I like to meet... ♪
445
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:32,839
Sorry, what?
446
00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:34,679
Well, Jinx let slip
that it was Pretty Woman,
447
00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:36,399
so I'm trying to give
the class a heads up.
448
00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:38,119
Mm. PRETTY Woman, but snaps.
449
00:21:38,120 --> 00:21:40,239
Piss off. Argh! Come on.
450
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:41,519
You're so selfish, man.
451
00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:43,599
Just show me
what you're writing about...
452
00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:45,559
KIDS SPEAK OVER EACH OTHER
453
00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:46,839
Say, "Pretty Woman."
454
00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:47,919
Pretty...
455
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:49,559
Pretty Woman, pretty Woman!
456
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,639
Pretty Woman!
457
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:52,640
INDISTINCT CHATTER
458
00:21:52,641 --> 00:21:53,641
That's her!
459
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:59,279
Erm, they didn't look like
they were working.
460
00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:00,479
Oh, shit, what time is it?
461
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:02,679
I haven't got my phone -
I'm screwed!
462
00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:04,679
Right, that presentation
starts soon,
463
00:22:04,680 --> 00:22:08,039
so we need to find a way into that
classroom without anyone seeing us.
464
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:10,039
You're not claustrophobic, are you?
465
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:13,319
♪ Oh, pretty woman... ♪
I can't get in.
466
00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:15,199
I feel like I'm thumbing in a softy.
467
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:17,519
You need to get in the foetal
position like when
468
00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:19,359
you're hiding in the boot
of a woman's car.
469
00:22:19,360 --> 00:22:21,239
No good. Stephen, you're up.
470
00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:23,799
Huh? Ah, absolutely not.
471
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,399
Any minute now them kids are gonna
be sat in that assembly hall
472
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:28,239
waiting for that exam to start.
473
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:29,600
Fine!
474
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:33,679
It's 2010. It's 2010.
You're Gaga, you're Gaga,
475
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:36,239
you're Gaga, you're Gaga!
476
00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:38,639
Do you want me to grease you up
or are you gonna go in dry?
477
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:40,399
Shut up, Fraser.
478
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:42,519
I'm gonna go in bareback.
479
00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:45,000
SQUELCHING
480
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:00,720
Let's go.
481
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:04,599
Argh...
482
00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:07,439
Mitchell, watch where you're going!
483
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:09,800
God, it stinks in here!
484
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:15,039
HIP-HOP PLAYS ON HEADPHONES
485
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:17,439
Fraser... Woohoo!
486
00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:18,599
Inchez!
487
00:23:18,600 --> 00:23:21,799
Pygmalion is Pretty Woman!
488
00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,999
Oh, my God!
489
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,759
STEPHEN SCREAMS
490
00:23:26,760 --> 00:23:28,040
Inchez!
491
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:34,759
Mr Harper! Where are you going
in those clothes?
492
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:36,239
Well, I could ask you
the same thing.
493
00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:37,999
What, you going shoplifting
in that coat?
494
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,439
Oh, give it a rest! Oh!
495
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:41,679
I found the English teacher
in a cupboard,
496
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:43,399
babbling about Pretty Woman.
497
00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:45,999
Perhaps I should've taken
his hood off before he passed out.
498
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:47,359
But you're cheating?
499
00:23:47,360 --> 00:23:48,879
Well, obviously.
500
00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:50,280
It's our only hope!
501
00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:53,759
This is the first time I've been
able to shake off those
502
00:23:53,760 --> 00:23:55,039
exam board ghouls.
503
00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:56,439
All right, so what's your plan?
504
00:23:56,440 --> 00:23:58,599
I plan to flash the children
during the exam.
505
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:01,639
Right, don't stress. Stephen is
in there right now telling the kids.
506
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:03,999
But the presentation has started.
507
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:05,239
Can't you tell the time?
508
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:07,039
Bernie, I'll level with ya.
509
00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:10,159
I have absolutely no idea how
this thing works.
510
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:11,759
CLOCK TICKS
511
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:14,559
Hurry up, you fool!
512
00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:16,400
Oh, I'm so sorry we're late.
513
00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:22,399
TIMERS BEEP
514
00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:24,119
Once upon a time,
515
00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:26,319
in a farm,
far, far away in Ireland,
516
00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:28,719
there lived Dr Doolittle.
517
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:30,199
Oh, God, we're dead.
518
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:32,039
Shut up, yoghurt boy. You shut up!
519
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:34,039
In a world...
520
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,359
..where metal meets flesh...
Inchez, stop, listen!
521
00:24:36,360 --> 00:24:37,999
..and all is chaos,
522
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:39,400
where swine rule...
523
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,079
Pop!
524
00:24:42,080 --> 00:24:44,159
Booyaka!
525
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:45,559
What are you doing?
526
00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:46,639
Chill, Miss.
527
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:48,079
It's a 4-D experience, innit?
528
00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,559
One pig refused to go home.
529
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:51,719
His name...
530
00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:53,359
..Pig Iron Man.
531
00:24:53,360 --> 00:24:54,759
Oi, dickhead,
532
00:24:54,760 --> 00:24:56,239
move to the left.
533
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:58,519
It's got nothing to do with pigs.
534
00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:00,079
Ahem.
535
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:02,519
Sirs, madams,
536
00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:04,839
Eliza Doolittle is a hot girl
537
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:08,079
who had to deal with everybody's
jealousy, even in the olden days.
538
00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:09,719
Is olden days a literary term?
539
00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:11,719
Go find a personality!
540
00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:13,039
Go get a brain cell!
541
00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:14,519
I'm gonna get him!
542
00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:16,200
- Go for the eyes.
- SHOUTING
543
00:25:16,203 --> 00:25:18,039
I can't die in a pig,
I can't die in a pig.
544
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,119
Not in this look, not in this wig!
545
00:25:20,120 --> 00:25:22,439
No, no, not the nails - argh!
546
00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:23,959
SHOUTING
547
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:25,439
And scene!
548
00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:26,540
SHOUTING STOPS
549
00:25:26,541 --> 00:25:27,639
Erm...
550
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:29,520
- USMA SIGHS
- Judas!
551
00:25:29,523 --> 00:25:31,879
Ladies and gentlemen
of the exam board,
552
00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:36,000
we present to you Class K's
presentation on Pygmalion.
553
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:47,839
Because, after all,
aren't we all Pygmalion?
554
00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:53,319
Ahem... Today, Mr Harper transformed
me from an anxious bibliophile
555
00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:55,199
and vegan into a yob,
556
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:58,239
the kind of person who hangs
their mates out to dry.
557
00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:01,639
Usma represents the person
Eliza Doolittle was
558
00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:04,519
forced to become -
elegant but submissive.
559
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:05,959
And peng.
560
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:09,559
Harrison embodies the blank pages
in our lives that we are yet
561
00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:10,799
to have written.
562
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:12,920
MUFFLED: Argh, argh, argh!
563
00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:16,999
Oh, shoot!
564
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:20,159
Oh, don't mind him - he's just
the English teacher.
565
00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:23,439
Who represents the... blindness
of the patriarchy.
566
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:25,399
STEPHEN: Oh, my life, enough!
567
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:26,679
Ugh!
568
00:26:26,680 --> 00:26:28,319
GASPS
569
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:30,760
Ah...
570
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:34,080
Oh, there's gunge in the wig!
571
00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:37,160
Oh...
572
00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:41,040
Water!
573
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:43,480
I need water!
574
00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:47,279
Ah!
575
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:48,919
To drink!
576
00:26:48,920 --> 00:26:49,999
Oh.
577
00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:53,599
And, ah, Mr Carmichael embodies
578
00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:56,319
the core themes of Pygmalion...
579
00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:58,999
..that within us all is a bold -
580
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:01,399
and certainly authentic -
581
00:27:01,400 --> 00:27:03,879
soul waiting to burst out.
582
00:27:03,880 --> 00:27:05,679
We just...
583
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,840
We just need the courage to be seen
for who we truly are.
584
00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:23,159
And... period!
585
00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:24,719
No.
586
00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:26,920
CHEERING
587
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:33,360
LAUGHTER
588
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:39,799
Can't believe I'm saying this, Jinx,
but that burn book was jokes.
589
00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:42,999
Oh, well, I didn't actually
write it.
590
00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:46,639
You guys all assumed I did
and I was a little bit butt-hurt,
591
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:48,599
so I just went with it.
592
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:49,799
Sorry.
593
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:52,559
Wait, so if you didn't write it,
then who did?
594
00:27:52,560 --> 00:27:54,239
Ah... My notebook!
595
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:55,439
Thank God.
596
00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:57,599
Wait, are you serious?
You wrote this?
597
00:27:57,600 --> 00:27:59,319
Ah, have you met your parents?
598
00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:01,519
I have to have clap-backs for
when they go on about how
599
00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:03,959
amazing you all are and how much
of a terrible teacher I am.
600
00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:07,239
But you're not a terrible teacher.
Yeah. Aw!
601
00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:09,119
I guess I am amazing. Hm!
602
00:28:09,120 --> 00:28:10,359
Thank you!
603
00:28:10,360 --> 00:28:14,039
But if you wrote it, then why isn't
there anything bad about Jinx in it?
604
00:28:14,040 --> 00:28:16,479
Oh, because my parents don't
come to the school.
605
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:19,079
They don't ask questions or
they're just too busy,
606
00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:22,799
or they just don't... care.
607
00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:25,399
Which is their loss,
because they wouldn't get to hear
608
00:28:25,400 --> 00:28:28,519
all the amazing things
I would tell them about you.
609
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:29,799
Oh...
610
00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:32,840
Well, erm, you could tell me now.
611
00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:35,799
Don't be a beg.
612
00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:37,039
Come on, home time.
613
00:28:37,040 --> 00:28:38,519
Warren, chair.
614
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:40,879
Oh, and you know the Burton suit?
615
00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:41,999
Burn it.
616
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:43,439
I won't be needing her any more.
617
00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:44,680
Come here!
618
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:53,280
♪ Yeah, proper tings
619
00:29:07,680 --> 00:29:09,479
♪ Original style
620
00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:13,200
♪ We come to kick the drum
The wicked money spoil, yeah. ♪
74932
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