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1
00:00:04,729 --> 00:00:08,154
And that is what we call
the hammer tire!
2
00:00:08,515 --> 00:00:10,903
The sledgehammer does not come
with your Demamp Camp:
3
00:00:10,922 --> 00:00:13,681
Working Out With Tires DVD purchase.
4
00:00:14,021 --> 00:00:15,195
Blake, you get that?
5
00:00:15,213 --> 00:00:17,775
God damn it, Adam. Yes.
We got it.
6
00:00:17,798 --> 00:00:20,145
Hey, Blake,
don't talk to me like that.
7
00:00:20,201 --> 00:00:21,420
Ders, did we get that?
8
00:00:21,446 --> 00:00:23,299
That argument for the
behind-the-scenes camera?
9
00:00:23,311 --> 00:00:25,859
Oh, no, no, no, this camera's not
behind-the-scenes footage, okay?
10
00:00:25,883 --> 00:00:27,459
This is my MTV True Life:
11
00:00:27,491 --> 00:00:28,847
I'm in a M?nage A Braj.
12
00:00:28,866 --> 00:00:30,087
Heh, heh, M?nage A Braj.
13
00:00:30,106 --> 00:00:31,544
- Let's focus, all right?
- All right, yep.
14
00:00:31,557 --> 00:00:33,251
We're missing some exercises here.
15
00:00:33,459 --> 00:00:34,955
- Let me check the list.
- Pffft.
16
00:00:34,979 --> 00:00:37,482
We got the tire hammer.
We got tire jump.
17
00:00:37,494 --> 00:00:38,501
- Tire wiggle.
- Yep.
18
00:00:38,528 --> 00:00:39,590
- Tire waggle.
- Got it.
19
00:00:39,608 --> 00:00:40,746
- The tire flip lift!
- Yes.
20
00:00:40,780 --> 00:00:42,381
- That's right.
- Good call, good call.
21
00:00:42,405 --> 00:00:43,193
Blake, you getting this?
22
00:00:43,199 --> 00:00:45,094
Oh, I'm getting it, baby.
We got it.
23
00:00:46,139 --> 00:00:49,653
This next exercise,
your bis might turn into tris,
24
00:00:49,771 --> 00:00:53,314
while your tris might turn
into God knows what.
25
00:00:53,497 --> 00:00:54,930
Are you ready?
26
00:00:55,078 --> 00:00:56,121
Yeah.
27
00:00:58,537 --> 00:00:59,984
Oh!
28
00:01:00,171 --> 00:01:01,787
My shoulders!
29
00:01:01,853 --> 00:01:02,898
We gotta get you to a hospital!
30
00:01:02,935 --> 00:01:04,373
- Pop it back into place!
- No, no, no.
31
00:01:04,411 --> 00:01:05,990
- I'm gonna pop it back!
- No, don't...
32
00:01:06,021 --> 00:01:07,197
Ohhh!
33
00:01:07,239 --> 00:01:08,919
That made it so much worse!
34
00:01:12,141 --> 00:01:16,563
Sync and correction by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
35
00:01:20,977 --> 00:01:22,603
- Let me out.
- I cannot believe
36
00:01:22,615 --> 00:01:25,095
they let you walk out of
the E.R. looking this way.
37
00:01:25,113 --> 00:01:26,139
We gotta get you fixed.
38
00:01:26,145 --> 00:01:28,380
Yeah, for 2,000 bucks?
Yeah, right.
39
00:01:28,386 --> 00:01:30,031
I'm saving up for hair plugs
for when I need them
40
00:01:30,055 --> 00:01:31,569
- in the future.
- Well, what's the deal, man?
41
00:01:31,587 --> 00:01:32,582
I thought you had insurance.
42
00:01:32,607 --> 00:01:34,222
We laughed so much times at those
43
00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:35,781
- Geico Gecko commercials.
- Mm-hmm.
44
00:01:35,799 --> 00:01:37,730
I guess my Grandpa must have
taken me off his plan,
45
00:01:37,754 --> 00:01:38,977
which is fine,
'cause I hate that man.
46
00:01:39,008 --> 00:01:40,530
Don't wanna be on his stupid
insurance anyways.
47
00:01:40,796 --> 00:01:41,796
Could you let me out of here?
48
00:01:41,820 --> 00:01:43,529
You can't live like this,
Adam, come on.
49
00:01:43,548 --> 00:01:46,296
You have to start the wave today
at Jillian's hockey game.
50
00:01:46,327 --> 00:01:48,244
- I can lead the wave.
- I can...
51
00:01:48,268 --> 00:01:50,191
Okay, that actually hurts a lot.
I'll do it next time.
52
00:01:50,203 --> 00:01:51,602
Doesn't matter.
Could you open the door?
53
00:01:51,635 --> 00:01:52,602
All right, fine, it's settled.
54
00:01:52,620 --> 00:01:54,099
We're gonna go see Gramps Demamp.
55
00:01:54,158 --> 00:01:55,322
Yep. 'Cause you know what?
56
00:01:55,346 --> 00:01:57,117
You're lucky you even have a grandpa.
57
00:01:57,190 --> 00:01:58,597
I never even met mine.
58
00:01:58,663 --> 00:02:00,639
I bet he was awesome.
I be he had crazy hair.
59
00:02:00,658 --> 00:02:01,558
Yeah, I bet he did.
60
00:02:01,589 --> 00:02:03,111
I mean, old people are really cool.
61
00:02:03,135 --> 00:02:04,843
They're like...
they're like the crypt keeper.
62
00:02:04,868 --> 00:02:07,460
- They just tell you stories.
- Yeah, or like young wizards.
63
00:02:07,492 --> 00:02:08,925
Fine. I'll tell you guys.
64
00:02:09,060 --> 00:02:10,687
My grandfather touched me as a kid.
65
00:02:10,778 --> 00:02:12,474
- In the butt hole.
- What?
66
00:02:12,492 --> 00:02:14,784
Okay, he didn't actually touch me.
He refused to hug me.
67
00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:16,209
I am not gonna go see my Grandpa!
68
00:02:16,239 --> 00:02:17,675
You let me out of this car right now.
69
00:02:17,687 --> 00:02:19,042
No, we're taking you
to see him, all right?
70
00:02:19,081 --> 00:02:21,130
- Blake, map it. We're going.
- Got it.
71
00:02:21,752 --> 00:02:24,435
Hi. Here to see George Demamp.
72
00:02:24,497 --> 00:02:25,745
He's my grandfather.
73
00:02:25,898 --> 00:02:27,381
If he's dead, I'm okay with that.
74
00:02:27,447 --> 00:02:29,376
You act like you wouldn't
care, but you would.
75
00:02:29,394 --> 00:02:31,574
You would cry.
Sign in, please.
76
00:02:31,865 --> 00:02:33,565
Whoa, check it out, guys.
77
00:02:33,665 --> 00:02:35,344
This dude throws knives into cats.
78
00:02:35,367 --> 00:02:38,167
That's a gun and a coyote.
You can tell from the snout.
79
00:02:38,421 --> 00:02:40,210
- Oh.
- But yeah, this is my day job.
80
00:02:40,235 --> 00:02:42,254
My real passion is animal control.
81
00:02:42,544 --> 00:02:44,693
My little line is,
"the animals in here
82
00:02:44,724 --> 00:02:46,701
are way worse
than the coyotes out there."
83
00:02:47,539 --> 00:02:48,847
That's a good joke.
84
00:02:48,860 --> 00:02:49,965
- That's clever.
- That's funny.
85
00:02:49,995 --> 00:02:51,379
- Thank you.
- It's not clever.
86
00:02:51,410 --> 00:02:53,162
And it sure as hell
isn't a good joke.
87
00:02:53,202 --> 00:02:56,365
The people that walk these halls
built this country, okay?
88
00:02:56,578 --> 00:02:58,057
- It's my little line.
- All right.
89
00:02:58,121 --> 00:03:01,152
Which room is my dumb, stupid,
fat, ugly Grandpa in?
90
00:03:01,269 --> 00:03:03,688
Gun one, gun two...
91
00:03:03,712 --> 00:03:05,859
Hey, Grandpa!
92
00:03:05,998 --> 00:03:07,668
Oh.
93
00:03:08,165 --> 00:03:09,338
Well, well, well.
94
00:03:09,359 --> 00:03:12,080
Look who it is.
Short-wide.
95
00:03:12,109 --> 00:03:13,536
Mm, good one.
96
00:03:13,590 --> 00:03:15,171
You come out of the closet yet?
97
00:03:17,246 --> 00:03:18,072
No.
98
00:03:18,090 --> 00:03:20,315
Only closet I'm in is the one
that I'm trapped in.
99
00:03:20,382 --> 00:03:22,545
With R. Kelly, watching a rap opera.
100
00:03:22,576 --> 00:03:24,276
Ah, cut the crap.
I know why you're here.
101
00:03:24,301 --> 00:03:27,049
You want to weasel
back onto my health insurance,
102
00:03:27,104 --> 00:03:28,435
you damn freeloader.
103
00:03:28,453 --> 00:03:30,329
I'm not a freeloader, okay?
104
00:03:30,341 --> 00:03:33,683
It's just I can't afford health insurance,
and I expect it to be free.
105
00:03:33,824 --> 00:03:35,994
- I have to go to the hospital.
- Hospital?
106
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:38,830
Hospital didn't help me
when I rode a Jeep
107
00:03:38,849 --> 00:03:43,039
out of a B-52 at 35,000 feet...
108
00:03:43,063 --> 00:03:46,662
- It was 25,000 last time.
- 35,000 feet,
109
00:03:46,739 --> 00:03:49,776
had to parachute
into enemy territory,
110
00:03:49,800 --> 00:03:52,049
and took eight bullets up my ass.
111
00:03:52,096 --> 00:03:52,731
Yeah.
112
00:03:52,755 --> 00:03:56,182
But you don't know anything about that
because you've never been in a war!
113
00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:57,686
Yeah, I've never been in a war
114
00:03:57,711 --> 00:04:00,152
'cause there's never been
any big wars for me to serve in!
115
00:04:00,177 --> 00:04:02,477
Oh, jeez, you know,
I don't have time for this.
116
00:04:02,514 --> 00:04:04,395
I've got my annual Luau,
117
00:04:04,445 --> 00:04:07,323
and I am in charge of the pig.
118
00:04:07,538 --> 00:04:10,121
And I'm not talking
about your Aunt Holly.
119
00:04:10,531 --> 00:04:12,945
Aunt Holly has a glandular disorder.
120
00:04:13,106 --> 00:04:14,482
Hey, could you hold that door?
121
00:04:14,507 --> 00:04:16,034
I actually can't open doors!
122
00:04:16,062 --> 00:04:19,032
Ow! Ow!
123
00:04:20,821 --> 00:04:21,964
I demand...
124
00:04:23,449 --> 00:04:25,132
Why did you bring your flip cam?
125
00:04:25,189 --> 00:04:26,608
'Cause I'm changing the plan.
126
00:04:26,638 --> 00:04:27,858
It's gonna be MTV True Life:
127
00:04:27,878 --> 00:04:29,761
I'm into old people.
I don't care.
128
00:04:29,799 --> 00:04:32,177
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Check out this old Braj.
129
00:04:33,725 --> 00:04:37,067
On a big ol' shady oak tree
130
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:39,991
Oh, man. This dude is sick!
131
00:04:40,041 --> 00:04:42,304
I'm talking, like, terminally chill.
132
00:04:42,341 --> 00:04:43,414
He is chill.
133
00:04:43,445 --> 00:04:46,752
I'm just gonna need a fresher angle
than some aged rocker.
134
00:04:46,770 --> 00:04:49,232
I mean, W.W.K.L.D.?
135
00:04:49,537 --> 00:04:50,837
What would Kurt Loder do?
136
00:04:50,886 --> 00:04:52,510
Said I was born
137
00:04:52,685 --> 00:04:55,209
Old people have been around
since the dawn of time.
138
00:04:55,272 --> 00:04:57,638
They have stories and messages.
Here's one now.
139
00:04:57,709 --> 00:05:00,656
Hey, ma'am, can I ask you
a few ques...
140
00:05:01,171 --> 00:05:02,683
we'll find a better one than that.
141
00:05:04,824 --> 00:05:06,042
Hey, nice shot.
142
00:05:06,134 --> 00:05:07,097
I know.
143
00:05:07,122 --> 00:05:08,750
Is it okay if I ask you
a couple questions?
144
00:05:08,789 --> 00:05:09,708
Questions?
145
00:05:09,749 --> 00:05:11,234
Just questions about your life.
146
00:05:11,253 --> 00:05:14,158
You know, I feel like people
of your generation
147
00:05:14,508 --> 00:05:16,221
have such wisdom that you can share.
148
00:05:16,270 --> 00:05:18,890
Why don't you tell me
about what you did
149
00:05:18,914 --> 00:05:20,487
before you lived here?
150
00:05:20,561 --> 00:05:23,047
I traveled to the world's
best cities,
151
00:05:23,178 --> 00:05:24,814
and in exchange,
152
00:05:24,919 --> 00:05:27,130
I married a rich man I didn't love.
153
00:05:27,165 --> 00:05:29,209
- Yeah.
- But enough about me.
154
00:05:29,650 --> 00:05:32,289
- Shoot.
- I-I don't know how to play.
155
00:05:32,305 --> 00:05:34,834
My dad never let me in the
billiards room growing up, so...
156
00:05:34,852 --> 00:05:36,334
Oh, that's heartbreaking.
157
00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:37,996
Maybe I can help you.
158
00:05:38,201 --> 00:05:39,311
Ow.
159
00:05:39,843 --> 00:05:41,521
All right, I'll start low?
160
00:05:41,546 --> 00:05:43,302
Now, before you shoot...
161
00:05:43,717 --> 00:05:45,288
Close your eyes,
162
00:05:45,643 --> 00:05:47,084
and put it in.
163
00:05:48,135 --> 00:05:49,769
Is everything okay in here?
164
00:05:49,810 --> 00:05:52,126
It's fine, Mark.
Just fine.
165
00:05:53,485 --> 00:05:56,674
Why don't we go somewhere where
we can be a little more private?
166
00:05:56,937 --> 00:05:58,085
All right.
167
00:05:58,129 --> 00:06:01,562
She don't want me no more
168
00:06:02,054 --> 00:06:03,811
Whoo!
169
00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:05,721
Yeah!
That was awesome, man!
170
00:06:05,744 --> 00:06:07,263
Where'd you learn
how to play like that?
171
00:06:07,298 --> 00:06:09,538
I roadied for ZZ Top.
172
00:06:10,044 --> 00:06:12,610
Plus I started taking
guitar lessons last year.
173
00:06:12,633 --> 00:06:13,844
I love ZZ Top.
174
00:06:13,868 --> 00:06:16,367
They're like the champagne
of beer-drinking music.
175
00:06:16,447 --> 00:06:18,935
Brother, I could tell you
some stories.
176
00:06:18,983 --> 00:06:20,895
I would love to hear those.
177
00:06:20,944 --> 00:06:23,373
Oh, my gosh.
What are you...
178
00:06:23,683 --> 00:06:24,544
what are you doing?
179
00:06:24,575 --> 00:06:26,983
I... you got a cigarette in your neck.
180
00:06:27,324 --> 00:06:29,617
Hey, you can't smoke in here.
181
00:06:29,711 --> 00:06:30,854
He can't smoke in here.
182
00:06:30,897 --> 00:06:33,264
And he knows that, because we've
been through this, Arthur.
183
00:06:33,489 --> 00:06:34,469
Haven't we?
184
00:06:35,903 --> 00:06:38,667
I don't get to have
any fun in this dump.
185
00:06:38,812 --> 00:06:40,811
They took away my cigarettes.
186
00:06:40,939 --> 00:06:42,754
They took away my booze.
187
00:06:42,809 --> 00:06:45,459
I can't even steal any pills anymore.
188
00:06:45,477 --> 00:06:48,409
I mean, what is wrong
with young people today, huh?
189
00:06:48,504 --> 00:06:51,115
They need to respect their elders'...
190
00:06:51,245 --> 00:06:54,437
desire to do as many drugs
as they want.
191
00:06:54,460 --> 00:06:57,615
You seem to me to be
a pretty righteous hombre.
192
00:06:58,852 --> 00:07:00,808
I wish you were my grandpa.
193
00:07:00,833 --> 00:07:02,021
I tell you what.
194
00:07:02,308 --> 00:07:04,452
You run some interference for me,
195
00:07:04,677 --> 00:07:06,668
help me score some pills,
196
00:07:06,856 --> 00:07:09,270
you can call me
anything you want, son.
197
00:07:09,375 --> 00:07:12,516
I know that I haven't been
in, like, a war war.
198
00:07:12,553 --> 00:07:15,191
But last spring, I got
in a fight at a dodgers game,
199
00:07:15,229 --> 00:07:16,546
and yeah, he beat me up pretty good.
200
00:07:16,565 --> 00:07:18,662
It was a very, very violent
Mexican man.
201
00:07:18,687 --> 00:07:20,316
But I got the first laugh.
202
00:07:20,335 --> 00:07:22,110
But you're too fat to fight.
203
00:07:22,171 --> 00:07:25,171
Go home, short-wide.
I got a pig to carve.
204
00:07:25,199 --> 00:07:27,302
And I'm not talking
about your Aunt Silvia.
205
00:07:27,345 --> 00:07:29,876
Stop it! You stop!
206
00:07:30,236 --> 00:07:31,870
Ow!
207
00:07:32,272 --> 00:07:34,011
Ow.
208
00:07:34,980 --> 00:07:36,483
I am not a pussy.
209
00:07:36,724 --> 00:07:38,553
And I'm gonna prove it to you.
210
00:07:47,365 --> 00:07:50,369
{pub}I'm gonna launch off this roof
at 7 miles per hour
211
00:07:50,400 --> 00:07:52,122
like a war helicopter.
212
00:07:52,604 --> 00:07:54,848
Then I'm gonna deploy this bed sheet
213
00:07:55,118 --> 00:07:57,235
as my parachute...
214
00:07:57,992 --> 00:08:00,749
And gently drop down to safety.
215
00:08:01,052 --> 00:08:02,979
You're gonna die.
216
00:08:03,184 --> 00:08:05,454
So would your girlfriend
be mad if she knew
217
00:08:05,484 --> 00:08:07,828
you were all alone
in another woman's room?
218
00:08:08,030 --> 00:08:09,175
No, I don't even have a girlf...
219
00:08:09,193 --> 00:08:11,066
I'm between girlfriends right now.
220
00:08:11,100 --> 00:08:13,097
Models is what I'm usually dating,
221
00:08:13,115 --> 00:08:16,291
but no, this is
strictly journalistic, so...
222
00:08:16,576 --> 00:08:19,204
well, come and get your scoop.
223
00:08:19,619 --> 00:08:21,269
I know what you're doing, but...
224
00:08:21,643 --> 00:08:22,931
your husband's
sleeping right there.
225
00:08:22,956 --> 00:08:24,576
Oh, honey, my husband's
been sleeping there
226
00:08:24,588 --> 00:08:26,432
for the last six years.
227
00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:27,621
Drop your pants,
228
00:08:27,664 --> 00:08:30,543
and I'll tell you everything
you want.
229
00:08:30,950 --> 00:08:32,369
All right, I just...
230
00:08:32,492 --> 00:08:34,250
I really want to be on MTV True Life.
231
00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:35,963
Have you seen it?
232
00:08:35,997 --> 00:08:38,061
It's pretty good.
233
00:08:39,114 --> 00:08:40,564
Oh, not so fast, Bronco.
234
00:08:40,595 --> 00:08:42,276
- Ow.
- I may not be old,
235
00:08:42,294 --> 00:08:43,562
but I am old-fashioned.
236
00:08:44,193 --> 00:08:48,306
So, uh, dance for me first.
237
00:08:54,070 --> 00:08:56,354
Right? And then a little bit of this.
It's not the butterfly.
238
00:08:56,381 --> 00:08:58,435
It's the tootsie roll.
Know what I mean?
239
00:09:11,150 --> 00:09:12,944
Nice day.
240
00:09:12,972 --> 00:09:14,779
- Uh-huh.
- What kind of enchiladas
241
00:09:14,811 --> 00:09:16,826
were those, huh?
Road kill?
242
00:09:16,895 --> 00:09:18,313
Mm-hmm.
243
00:09:18,450 --> 00:09:20,720
Wouldn't mind if we had
some smooth pudding
244
00:09:20,745 --> 00:09:22,339
every once in a while.
245
00:09:23,961 --> 00:09:25,429
Oh! Oh!
246
00:09:25,448 --> 00:09:26,460
I'm coming, sir.
247
00:09:26,490 --> 00:09:27,929
- Oh, bacon bits!
- Okay.
248
00:09:27,948 --> 00:09:29,114
Oh, just the tip of my hip...
249
00:09:29,145 --> 00:09:30,948
no, no need to touch, really!
250
00:09:31,124 --> 00:09:32,723
No, it's fine.
251
00:09:32,767 --> 00:09:33,773
You got witch hands.
252
00:09:33,801 --> 00:09:36,440
- No.
- You got witch hands, okay?
253
00:09:36,464 --> 00:09:38,187
Oh, so tell me about the '60s.
254
00:09:38,212 --> 00:09:40,691
Did you march, and for what side?
255
00:09:40,919 --> 00:09:43,589
What happened?
Did somebody hit the emergency...
256
00:09:43,627 --> 00:09:46,827
Peggy, Jesus Christ.
Not again.
257
00:09:46,975 --> 00:09:48,125
Again?
258
00:09:50,930 --> 00:09:52,124
Nice, I think we got 'em, man.
259
00:09:52,151 --> 00:09:54,360
Hey! You are not two old men.
260
00:09:54,399 --> 00:09:57,602
You are an old man, but you are not.
261
00:10:00,697 --> 00:10:02,199
And in conclusion,
262
00:10:02,217 --> 00:10:04,194
as the civil rights activist
263
00:10:04,457 --> 00:10:06,986
Dr. Martens Luther King once said,
264
00:10:07,443 --> 00:10:09,504
take yee sleazy.
265
00:10:10,576 --> 00:10:12,086
And I'm out.
266
00:10:17,851 --> 00:10:19,867
Ow, my shoulders!
267
00:10:19,892 --> 00:10:21,048
Oh, God!
268
00:10:21,064 --> 00:10:22,998
Oh, God!
269
00:10:26,540 --> 00:10:27,429
Damn it.
270
00:10:27,841 --> 00:10:29,692
Okay, you three, guess what.
271
00:10:29,711 --> 00:10:32,923
Go to your rooms,
and say aloha to the Luau.
272
00:10:32,954 --> 00:10:35,666
But make it the good-bye aloha,
'cause you're not going.
273
00:10:35,700 --> 00:10:38,547
Get. And you three,
get the hell out of here.
274
00:10:38,565 --> 00:10:39,541
Don't film me.
275
00:10:39,594 --> 00:10:41,050
Don't film me anymore.
276
00:10:41,073 --> 00:10:43,063
This is all your fault.
277
00:10:43,136 --> 00:10:45,806
- Blake.
- See ya, Grandpa.
278
00:10:46,515 --> 00:10:47,660
This sucks.
279
00:10:47,694 --> 00:10:49,724
I finally get a grandpa
worth keeping and loving,
280
00:10:49,748 --> 00:10:51,477
and his beard slips
right through my fingers.
281
00:10:51,489 --> 00:10:53,040
Yeah, and I might as well
call my true life
282
00:10:53,048 --> 00:10:56,024
MTV True Life: I can't make
an MTV True Life to save my life.
283
00:10:56,049 --> 00:10:58,847
- This isn't over. Mm-mm.
- No, it's not.
284
00:10:58,865 --> 00:11:00,492
You still need insurance
from your Gramps.
285
00:11:00,509 --> 00:11:02,920
I need to prove to that
old turd that I'm a real Demamp.
286
00:11:02,982 --> 00:11:04,562
I'm gonna steal
his wrinkly ass out of here,
287
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:06,010
and then I'm gonna take him
to the yard,
288
00:11:06,060 --> 00:11:07,059
and the yard is our house,
289
00:11:07,084 --> 00:11:08,790
and I'm gonna bark at him
like a big dog,
290
00:11:08,808 --> 00:11:10,474
'cause I'm a big dog,
and I'm ready to...
291
00:11:10,522 --> 00:11:12,816
Howwwl!
292
00:11:13,301 --> 00:11:15,027
- What are you talking about?
- I don't know, man.
293
00:11:15,057 --> 00:11:17,376
I'm in a lot of pain right now.
I think I might die.
294
00:11:17,632 --> 00:11:20,255
Lady and old dudes,
295
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:24,043
welcome to the inautical
our Luau for old people party.
296
00:11:24,067 --> 00:11:25,536
Hey, what's up?
297
00:11:26,617 --> 00:11:28,753
- Jillian!
- Hey!
298
00:11:28,779 --> 00:11:30,937
- Where's the Luau stuff?
- What is this?
299
00:11:30,956 --> 00:11:32,032
I don't know.
It's a Luau.
300
00:11:32,052 --> 00:11:33,695
It's a different kind of Luau.
301
00:11:33,719 --> 00:11:36,472
Luau? Blake texted me Lou Albano.
302
00:11:36,676 --> 00:11:38,112
- What?
- I thought he meant, like,
303
00:11:38,136 --> 00:11:40,086
"Captain Lou" Albano,
the wrestling manager
304
00:11:40,104 --> 00:11:41,605
and Cindy Lauper's dad.
305
00:11:41,630 --> 00:11:44,223
Ohhh, yeah, psh.
Look at that.
306
00:11:44,311 --> 00:11:48,641
Phone must've auto-corrected
Luau to Lou Albano.
307
00:11:48,883 --> 00:11:50,468
Wow, that's insane.
308
00:11:50,493 --> 00:11:52,902
How often are you texting
the words "Lou Albano"?
309
00:11:52,936 --> 00:11:54,254
I don't know.
310
00:11:54,279 --> 00:11:56,007
Like, four to five times a week.
311
00:11:56,580 --> 00:11:58,799
But what's up with all the cool, uh,
312
00:11:58,860 --> 00:12:00,646
hip, happening chicks, Jillian?
313
00:12:00,656 --> 00:12:02,427
Oh, this is my hockey team.
314
00:12:02,458 --> 00:12:03,698
We were gonna go to the bar
315
00:12:03,710 --> 00:12:05,774
after our big win,
but this seemed like more fun.
316
00:12:05,787 --> 00:12:08,369
Yeah, bunch of crazy Russian bitches.
317
00:12:09,113 --> 00:12:10,844
No, they're dolls.
They're sweet girls.
318
00:12:10,907 --> 00:12:13,659
- Oh, I bet.
- What's up, babies?
319
00:12:13,740 --> 00:12:15,522
You know the mouth of the South
ain't gonna miss
320
00:12:15,540 --> 00:12:18,888
a "Captain Lou" Albano party
with hockey chicks!
321
00:12:20,178 --> 00:12:21,678
Slash-Luau.
322
00:12:23,121 --> 00:12:24,301
It's me.
Uh, it's Karl.
323
00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:26,198
I'm dressed as Jimmy Hart.
324
00:12:36,108 --> 00:12:40,438
{pub}So how does our Luau compare
to your old folks' Luau?
325
00:12:41,461 --> 00:12:43,288
I like this one a lot better.
326
00:12:43,344 --> 00:12:45,064
Thank you.
We worked kind of...
327
00:12:45,082 --> 00:12:46,344
Oh, I see what you're...
328
00:12:46,412 --> 00:12:49,065
God, you're...
hey! Here's the deal.
329
00:12:49,777 --> 00:12:51,547
I'll let you have a dance, one song,
330
00:12:51,565 --> 00:12:53,406
but then you gotta answer
one of my questions.
331
00:12:53,465 --> 00:12:55,364
- Sure thing, babe.
- All right.
332
00:12:55,767 --> 00:12:57,117
Have a good...
333
00:12:57,733 --> 00:12:59,877
have a good time.
334
00:13:02,374 --> 00:13:04,605
Ahh.
335
00:13:04,761 --> 00:13:06,886
- Now, this is my kinda party.
- Yeah.
336
00:13:06,898 --> 00:13:09,439
- What's going on here?
- Russian drinking game.
337
00:13:09,464 --> 00:13:10,707
No pussy men allowed.
338
00:13:10,738 --> 00:13:13,826
Whoa, okay,
USA all the way, all right?
339
00:13:13,845 --> 00:13:16,459
I bet 20 bucks my Gramps here
could drink y'all
340
00:13:16,478 --> 00:13:19,043
Dolph Lundgrenettes under the table.
341
00:13:19,675 --> 00:13:21,497
- Let's go.
- All right.
342
00:13:21,516 --> 00:13:22,803
Show 'em who's boss.
343
00:13:24,003 --> 00:13:25,216
Mm-hmm.
344
00:13:29,208 --> 00:13:30,360
- Whoo!
- Ahh.
345
00:13:30,384 --> 00:13:31,968
- Yeah!
- Lina.
346
00:13:31,986 --> 00:13:34,038
- We need more vodka.
- Why?
347
00:13:34,381 --> 00:13:37,352
We got plenty of good alcohol
right here.
348
00:13:37,564 --> 00:13:39,218
Oh, no, that's hand sanitizer.
349
00:13:39,254 --> 00:13:40,948
That's not...
350
00:13:45,161 --> 00:13:46,688
Ah.
351
00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:48,677
Want some?
352
00:13:48,722 --> 00:13:50,073
He beat me.
353
00:13:50,292 --> 00:13:52,577
Straight up.
Pay him.
354
00:13:52,645 --> 00:13:53,738
Pay this man his money.
355
00:13:53,829 --> 00:13:55,411
Whoo!
356
00:13:55,577 --> 00:13:57,182
Anybody got any hard drugs?
357
00:13:58,225 --> 00:13:59,938
USA.
358
00:14:00,164 --> 00:14:01,313
Uh-oh.
359
00:14:01,332 --> 00:14:03,326
Grandpa.
He's just taking a nap.
360
00:14:03,339 --> 00:14:05,475
- Grandpa...
- Whoo!
361
00:14:05,769 --> 00:14:07,933
Anybody got any hard drugs?
362
00:14:09,890 --> 00:14:12,256
Grandpa, I know you think
I pussed out earlier,
363
00:14:12,274 --> 00:14:13,739
but I'm gonna prove to you
once and for all
364
00:14:13,764 --> 00:14:15,319
I'm a real Demamp, starting now.
365
00:14:15,331 --> 00:14:16,632
- Jillian, you ready?
- Yep.
366
00:14:16,666 --> 00:14:18,589
- Okay.
- On action, okay? Ready?
367
00:14:18,614 --> 00:14:20,173
Yep.
Grandpa, you watching?
368
00:14:20,202 --> 00:14:22,420
- And action.
- Yo.
369
00:14:22,456 --> 00:14:25,055
What it is?
Adam Demamp here,
370
00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:28,799
here with Demamp Camp:Working Out With Tires.
371
00:14:28,946 --> 00:14:32,167
As you saw earlier,
I de-located both of my arms
372
00:14:32,173 --> 00:14:34,387
doing my classic dead tire flip lift.
373
00:14:34,475 --> 00:14:37,328
But I plan on doing the impossible
374
00:14:37,346 --> 00:14:39,717
to prove to my grandfather
that I'm not a pussy.
375
00:14:39,745 --> 00:14:42,668
That's him right there, although that
has nothing to do with the video.
376
00:14:42,707 --> 00:14:44,008
But I shall do it right now,
377
00:14:44,025 --> 00:14:46,552
1,000 times in a row,
starting right now.
378
00:14:46,856 --> 00:14:49,217
Okay. Are you getting this?
379
00:14:49,249 --> 00:14:50,699
Grandpa, are you watching?
380
00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:53,369
Oh!
381
00:14:53,525 --> 00:14:55,451
- Oh, my back!
- Adam...
382
00:14:55,475 --> 00:14:57,165
I ripped my back muscle in half!
383
00:15:05,122 --> 00:15:06,552
Hey, I'm so sorry to interrupt.
384
00:15:06,577 --> 00:15:09,041
Is it okay if I borrow
your dance partner, just for a second?
385
00:15:09,062 --> 00:15:10,276
Get over here.
386
00:15:10,295 --> 00:15:12,900
I don't know what your endgame is,
but that old horny lady over there
387
00:15:12,918 --> 00:15:14,746
thinks you're a guy,
so unless you want her
388
00:15:14,765 --> 00:15:16,095
to find out otherwise,
389
00:15:16,133 --> 00:15:19,674
you better answer some questions
for my new documentary, MTV True Life:
390
00:15:19,708 --> 00:15:21,904
I'm a Russian lesbian hockey
player living in America,
391
00:15:21,976 --> 00:15:23,331
maybe legally.
392
00:15:23,732 --> 00:15:25,768
How about I just beat your ass?
393
00:15:26,046 --> 00:15:27,263
I don't fight girls.
394
00:15:27,387 --> 00:15:29,259
Oh! No, please!
395
00:15:29,290 --> 00:15:30,504
Oh, yes!
396
00:15:30,529 --> 00:15:32,577
I love it when they fight over me.
397
00:15:32,592 --> 00:15:34,295
Fight, fight!
398
00:15:35,909 --> 00:15:38,454
You're dancing with a woman.
399
00:15:39,347 --> 00:15:40,923
Oh, and one...
400
00:15:40,948 --> 00:15:42,785
And two... And three!
401
00:15:42,797 --> 00:15:44,564
That's it.
We got a new winner.
402
00:15:44,582 --> 00:15:45,834
We've got a winner!
403
00:15:45,852 --> 00:15:47,980
She knocked you out like a bitch!
404
00:15:49,007 --> 00:15:50,388
Russian whip-its.
405
00:15:50,497 --> 00:15:51,409
Oh, dear.
406
00:15:51,434 --> 00:15:53,922
It will blow the hair
right off your babushka.
407
00:15:56,063 --> 00:15:58,626
We want to keep the hair on
his babushka today, thank you.
408
00:15:58,648 --> 00:16:00,092
- Okay...
- Ha, ha, ha!
409
00:16:00,105 --> 00:16:03,417
Hockey team...
hey, no!
410
00:16:04,693 --> 00:16:05,735
See what you...
411
00:16:05,820 --> 00:16:07,182
Great. All right.
412
00:16:07,277 --> 00:16:08,880
Do you need to go
to the restroom, or what?
413
00:16:08,911 --> 00:16:10,594
- Yeah, I...
- He can't breathe.
414
00:16:10,813 --> 00:16:12,917
He can't breathe.
He can't breathe!
415
00:16:12,935 --> 00:16:14,351
CPR! Anybody?
416
00:16:14,370 --> 00:16:15,695
- Blake...
- I got you, Grandpa.
417
00:16:15,707 --> 00:16:17,729
Uh, just, uh,
split the mustache, and...
418
00:16:17,753 --> 00:16:18,816
- no, no, no!
- And kind of just...
419
00:16:18,828 --> 00:16:20,870
no! Mouth to neck.
420
00:16:20,894 --> 00:16:22,451
- Huh?
- Mouth, neck.
421
00:16:22,469 --> 00:16:24,914
- You got to help me, Grandson.
- Oh, no, no.
422
00:16:25,113 --> 00:16:27,277
Maybe this is just your time
to go, my old man.
423
00:16:27,283 --> 00:16:28,042
I can't breathe.
424
00:16:28,066 --> 00:16:29,652
You got to help your old Grandpa.
425
00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:31,672
Okay, okay, okay,
okay, okay, fine, fine.
426
00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:33,534
Uh...
Uh...
427
00:16:33,637 --> 00:16:37,006
Eh... Uh...
Ugh...
428
00:16:41,007 --> 00:16:42,823
- Oh! Oh!
- I'm good.
429
00:16:44,033 --> 00:16:46,516
I got your... I got your
throat spluge on my mouth!
430
00:16:46,547 --> 00:16:47,639
Oh, my God!
431
00:16:47,664 --> 00:16:50,665
That was a rush.
Do you wanna keep it going?
432
00:17:00,175 --> 00:17:02,298
{pub}Just give me
the health insurance, please!
433
00:17:03,464 --> 00:17:06,342
Just give me the health insurance!
434
00:17:06,438 --> 00:17:08,980
Please! I don't know what else to do.
435
00:17:08,999 --> 00:17:10,574
Oh, Jesus!
436
00:17:10,669 --> 00:17:14,456
Oh, fuck, now I burned my hand.
437
00:17:17,081 --> 00:17:19,006
Just made it in time.
438
00:17:21,933 --> 00:17:23,725
George! Hey!
439
00:17:23,838 --> 00:17:25,028
It's time to go home.
440
00:17:25,052 --> 00:17:27,330
Oh, I don't think so, Mark.
441
00:17:27,349 --> 00:17:29,734
You took my pig away from me.
442
00:17:29,746 --> 00:17:32,471
And I'm not talking
about this piece right here.
443
00:17:32,502 --> 00:17:34,594
So sayonara.
444
00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:36,777
Yeah... no. No.
445
00:17:37,100 --> 00:17:39,484
Your Grandpa's a total dick.
446
00:17:39,939 --> 00:17:41,118
Grandpa!
447
00:17:41,149 --> 00:17:43,163
Come on.
All right, all right, all right.
448
00:17:43,585 --> 00:17:45,879
- Keep them in the truck.
- Saved your life, man.
449
00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:47,984
I saw George heading west.
450
00:17:48,006 --> 00:17:50,170
He's not gonna get far
on those artificial hips.
451
00:17:50,656 --> 00:17:52,471
Tranq gun.
452
00:17:52,768 --> 00:17:55,071
No. He's my Grandpa.
453
00:17:55,766 --> 00:17:57,628
I got this.
454
00:18:01,503 --> 00:18:03,646
Oh! Oh, that hurt.
455
00:18:03,733 --> 00:18:05,094
Yeah. Okay.
456
00:18:05,198 --> 00:18:07,351
- West is the other way.
- Okay.
457
00:18:07,670 --> 00:18:09,546
Yeah. Ugh.
458
00:18:10,058 --> 00:18:11,617
You hiding from me?
459
00:18:11,841 --> 00:18:14,487
I'm a way better hiderer
than you'll ever be.
460
00:18:14,853 --> 00:18:16,509
Oh, I found you.
461
00:18:16,584 --> 00:18:19,562
I... you... agh! Ow!
462
00:18:19,649 --> 00:18:21,093
Jeez.
463
00:18:21,947 --> 00:18:22,860
Get back here!
464
00:18:22,884 --> 00:18:24,245
Ow.
465
00:18:24,507 --> 00:18:26,442
I'm gonna shoot you so hard!
466
00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:28,184
Come on.
467
00:18:30,531 --> 00:18:32,186
Jeez, it's like Double Dare in here.
468
00:18:33,204 --> 00:18:35,824
Jesus, how many plants
does this... ugh.
469
00:18:35,855 --> 00:18:36,918
What's happening?
470
00:18:37,123 --> 00:18:39,038
You have a beautiful home. I love it.
471
00:18:40,871 --> 00:18:43,316
Ow. Is this marble?
It's beautiful.
472
00:18:43,335 --> 00:18:45,229
Hey! You get back here!
473
00:18:47,139 --> 00:18:48,516
Get back here!
474
00:18:49,010 --> 00:18:51,278
You get back here right now!
475
00:18:51,808 --> 00:18:52,924
Get down!
476
00:18:53,043 --> 00:18:54,295
Get down!
477
00:18:55,604 --> 00:18:58,003
Whoo! Whoooo!
478
00:19:11,155 --> 00:19:12,339
Oh!
479
00:19:12,927 --> 00:19:15,268
- Agh.
- Man down.
480
00:19:16,876 --> 00:19:20,053
Sorry about that. Family stuff.
You guys have grandpas, right?
481
00:19:20,137 --> 00:19:22,533
Grandpa? Oh, my God.
I'm so sorry.
482
00:19:22,551 --> 00:19:23,950
There was no other way.
483
00:19:23,962 --> 00:19:25,783
No, no, it's okay.
484
00:19:25,811 --> 00:19:28,539
I'm proud of you because...
485
00:19:28,690 --> 00:19:31,401
You proved yourself to be a real man.
486
00:19:32,449 --> 00:19:33,537
Unlike me.
487
00:19:33,558 --> 00:19:36,320
- What?
- I'm not a war hero.
488
00:19:36,783 --> 00:19:39,945
I got a dishonorable discharge
because...
489
00:19:40,390 --> 00:19:43,990
I shot myself in the leg
to avoid combat.
490
00:19:44,015 --> 00:19:47,391
And the only reason
I was so hard on you
491
00:19:47,552 --> 00:19:50,837
was because I didn't want you
to end up like me.
492
00:19:51,243 --> 00:19:52,943
I'm a loser.
493
00:19:52,968 --> 00:19:54,690
You're not a loser.
494
00:19:54,797 --> 00:19:56,240
You are a Demamp.
495
00:19:56,721 --> 00:19:58,432
It's not in our T.N.A.
496
00:19:58,561 --> 00:20:02,294
I'm gonna put you
back on the health insurance.
497
00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:03,912
You know why?
498
00:20:04,174 --> 00:20:04,989
Why?
499
00:20:05,001 --> 00:20:08,677
Because you learned
how to take a punch.
500
00:20:10,303 --> 00:20:11,836
Ow!
501
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,622
Fuck!
502
00:20:14,265 --> 00:20:15,780
Welcome to Demamp Camp:
503
00:20:15,849 --> 00:20:17,125
Fully insured.
504
00:20:17,156 --> 00:20:18,400
On this new edition,
505
00:20:18,419 --> 00:20:20,713
I will be showing you
a brand-new exercise
506
00:20:20,732 --> 00:20:24,212
that I just created using my
own brain and intelligence.
507
00:20:24,262 --> 00:20:26,517
It's called "the roof-fly-delt-pump".
508
00:20:26,529 --> 00:20:27,855
Basically, you get a running start,
509
00:20:27,873 --> 00:20:29,693
pump your delts so hard that you come
510
00:20:29,706 --> 00:20:33,621
to a nice, soft landing,
because you've just flown
511
00:20:33,665 --> 00:20:35,156
for a few seconds.
512
00:20:35,174 --> 00:20:36,635
Let's do this!
513
00:20:36,786 --> 00:20:38,807
Come on, here we go. Yeah!
514
00:20:39,812 --> 00:20:43,053
- Ohhh!
- Oh! Adam!
515
00:20:43,097 --> 00:20:44,625
Blake, we get it?
516
00:20:44,743 --> 00:20:46,128
Dude, you don't have
to keep asking me
517
00:20:46,140 --> 00:20:47,917
if we got... oh.
518
00:20:47,987 --> 00:20:50,150
Actually, I ran out of batteries.
519
00:20:50,437 --> 00:20:51,506
Ders, did you get it?
520
00:20:51,541 --> 00:20:53,512
Yeah, did you get
the behind-the-scenes?
521
00:20:53,593 --> 00:20:54,873
Yeah, I got it.
522
00:20:54,910 --> 00:20:56,248
MTV True Life:
523
00:20:56,281 --> 00:20:58,587
I'm trying to get on Tosh.0.
524
00:20:58,695 --> 00:21:03,695
Sync and correction by Mlmlte
www.addic7ed.com Resync for WEB-DL by Norther
525
00:21:03,745 --> 00:21:08,295
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
37314
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