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1
00:00:02,833 --> 00:00:04,932
Nikki, uh...
Nikki in there yet?
2
00:00:06,199 --> 00:00:07,665
No...
3
00:00:07,733 --> 00:00:10,665
But I did see her at her
locker after first period
4
00:00:10,733 --> 00:00:12,465
talking to Kenny moran.
5
00:00:12,533 --> 00:00:15,865
You know, he is the captain
of the football team.
6
00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:17,932
When you say things
like that,
7
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:19,832
you're being way more
childish than I am,
8
00:00:19,900 --> 00:00:22,065
like a billion, trillion,
gajillion times more.
9
00:00:22,133 --> 00:00:24,298
Oh, here she comes!
Here she comes.
10
00:00:24,366 --> 00:00:25,865
She see the flowers yet?
11
00:00:25,933 --> 00:00:27,532
Ah, she's smiling...
12
00:00:27,599 --> 00:00:29,032
She's reading
the card!
13
00:00:29,099 --> 00:00:31,465
She stopped smiling.
14
00:00:31,533 --> 00:00:34,365
Ooh, she's coming in here.
Ooh, she's pissed!
15
00:00:35,500 --> 00:00:37,465
What the hell are these
supposed to mean?
16
00:00:37,533 --> 00:00:40,465
Relax. It's just... just my way of
saying thank you for a job well done.
17
00:00:40,533 --> 00:00:42,932
Doing the same
thing for everybody.
18
00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:44,099
Hey, Paul, uh...
19
00:00:44,166 --> 00:00:46,165
Nice press conference yesterday.
20
00:00:46,233 --> 00:00:48,065
Uh... Here.
21
00:00:50,033 --> 00:00:51,565
Take my watch.
22
00:00:53,033 --> 00:00:55,932
Oh, thanks, Mike!
23
00:00:55,999 --> 00:00:58,365
Mike, I'm in a
relationship with Arthur!
24
00:00:58,433 --> 00:00:59,665
Oh, really?
25
00:00:59,733 --> 00:01:01,732
Don't you see how
unfair this is to me?
26
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,298
Ok, I should
just go...
27
00:01:03,365 --> 00:01:04,431
no. You should just stay.
28
00:01:04,499 --> 00:01:05,765
We're just gonna tell
you later anyway.
29
00:01:05,833 --> 00:01:09,066
Yeah, that would
be more efficient.
30
00:01:09,133 --> 00:01:12,966
If you want me to back off so
that you can see how you...
31
00:01:13,033 --> 00:01:16,099
Really feel about Arthur, I
can do that, you know? I...
32
00:01:16,167 --> 00:01:19,699
only if you really,
really, really want me to.
33
00:01:19,766 --> 00:01:22,398
I really, really,
really want you to.
34
00:01:22,466 --> 00:01:25,398
Are you gonna be
ok with that?
35
00:01:26,967 --> 00:01:28,932
Hah hah hah hah hah!
36
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:32,498
(HEARTBEAT THUMPS)
Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah!
37
00:01:32,566 --> 00:01:35,598
(THA-DUMP THA-DUMP)
Aah! Aah! Hah hah!
38
00:01:35,666 --> 00:01:37,865
(THA-DUMP THA-DUMP) Hah hah hah!
Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!
39
00:01:41,432 --> 00:01:43,699
Sure, no problem.
40
00:01:55,199 --> 00:01:58,098
Captioning made possible by
dreamworks television, llc, abc inc.,
41
00:01:58,165 --> 00:02:01,198
and the crisp,
clear refreshing taste of 7up
42
00:02:11,432 --> 00:02:13,331
Mike, I know
I agreed to go
43
00:02:13,399 --> 00:02:15,398
to that waterfront
dedication today,
44
00:02:15,466 --> 00:02:17,565
but with all those
random people out there,
45
00:02:17,633 --> 00:02:19,331
who's to say one of 'em
wouldn't be a heckler
46
00:02:19,399 --> 00:02:20,831
or an activist...
47
00:02:20,899 --> 00:02:23,398
Or a disgruntled
former CIA agent
48
00:02:23,466 --> 00:02:25,831
who's been stalking me
for years
49
00:02:25,899 --> 00:02:27,931
and has a high-powered
plastic gun
50
00:02:27,999 --> 00:02:30,265
that he hides
in a rabbit's foot.
51
00:02:30,332 --> 00:02:33,665
Sir, you rented in the line
of fire again, didn't ya?
52
00:02:33,732 --> 00:02:35,831
No! (LAUGHS)
53
00:02:35,899 --> 00:02:37,498
Maybe.
54
00:02:39,432 --> 00:02:41,231
Mike, the director of the
gay pride parade called.
55
00:02:41,299 --> 00:02:43,331
They're withdrawing the mayor's
invitation to ride on the float
56
00:02:43,399 --> 00:02:45,132
unless he responds
to the incident.
57
00:02:45,199 --> 00:02:46,798
What incident?
58
00:02:46,866 --> 00:02:49,731
Oh, remember we had the mayor
speak to the gay communities
59
00:02:49,799 --> 00:02:51,331
of all 5 boroughs?
60
00:02:51,399 --> 00:02:54,098
Brooklyn and the Bronx went
great, but in retrospect,
61
00:02:54,166 --> 00:02:56,998
we really shouldn't have had
him start that third speech
62
00:02:57,066 --> 00:02:58,965
with "hello, queens."
63
00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:04,565
That's not funny.
64
00:03:04,633 --> 00:03:06,832
So you see why
I put you two together
65
00:03:06,899 --> 00:03:08,798
to come up with the speech.
You finished yet?
66
00:03:08,866 --> 00:03:10,832
Some of James'
best work.
67
00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:12,798
Oh, please.
It wasn't me.
68
00:03:12,866 --> 00:03:15,865
I'm just looking for
a simple yes or no.
69
00:03:15,933 --> 00:03:17,265
Yes.
Yes.
70
00:03:17,333 --> 00:03:18,265
What speech?
71
00:03:18,333 --> 00:03:20,099
I thought you knew.
72
00:03:21,899 --> 00:03:24,965
Stuart, don't ever touch
my date book again.
73
00:03:25,033 --> 00:03:27,265
You don't know
it was me.
74
00:03:27,333 --> 00:03:30,332
"February 9th.
Service Stuart."
75
00:03:32,066 --> 00:03:34,665
10th is good for me,
too.
76
00:03:34,733 --> 00:03:38,265
You know what, stu? A few months
ago, this might have bothered me.
77
00:03:38,333 --> 00:03:41,199
But now...
I'm confident.
78
00:03:41,266 --> 00:03:43,265
I have a great
boyfriend.
79
00:03:43,333 --> 00:03:44,765
Life is good.
80
00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:46,765
You cannot
affect me.
81
00:03:46,833 --> 00:03:50,798
I put fake nude pictures
of you on the Internet.
82
00:03:50,866 --> 00:03:52,065
Mmm!
83
00:03:52,133 --> 00:03:53,132
It's over, Stuart.
84
00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:54,765
Hi, guys.
85
00:03:54,833 --> 00:03:56,832
Hi, sweetie.
86
00:03:56,899 --> 00:03:58,965
I'll be
right back.
87
00:03:59,033 --> 00:04:01,398
We're a good couple,
aren't we?
88
00:04:01,465 --> 00:04:03,765
Why would you care
what I think?
89
00:04:03,833 --> 00:04:07,765
Well, you and Nikki are so close, I
thought we should be close, too.
90
00:04:07,833 --> 00:04:09,965
Come on, Carter.
91
00:04:16,267 --> 00:04:18,832
This your first time
taping news footage?
92
00:04:18,900 --> 00:04:20,266
Yeah, how'd you know?
93
00:04:20,332 --> 00:04:23,065
Just a wild guess.
94
00:04:23,133 --> 00:04:25,199
Mike, let's get this
dedication over with.
95
00:04:25,267 --> 00:04:28,431
Hey, Mr. mayor, whaddaya say you
give me a little publicity here?
96
00:04:28,499 --> 00:04:30,865
Have a hot dog.
It's on me.
97
00:04:30,933 --> 00:04:33,799
Sorry, but I find vender
food to be repulsive.
98
00:04:33,866 --> 00:04:35,799
Thanks anyway.
Vote Winston!
99
00:04:35,866 --> 00:04:37,799
Mr. mayor...
100
00:04:37,866 --> 00:04:39,899
we're over here.
There you go.
101
00:04:39,966 --> 00:04:43,298
Mike, this pier doesn't
seem that secure.
102
00:04:43,365 --> 00:04:45,199
Aren't there any
secret service around?
103
00:04:45,267 --> 00:04:48,598
Yes, sir, right there.
We got one over there,
104
00:04:48,666 --> 00:04:50,266
and this little girl
with the balloons.
105
00:04:50,332 --> 00:04:51,832
Sir, there are
bodyguards everywhere.
106
00:04:51,900 --> 00:04:53,199
And Paul's here
and Nikki's here.
107
00:04:53,267 --> 00:04:55,266
You have my personal guarantee
nothing is gonna hap...
108
00:04:55,332 --> 00:04:56,698
it's a gun!
(POP POP POP)
109
00:04:56,766 --> 00:04:58,398
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
110
00:05:01,900 --> 00:05:03,199
I'm hit! I'm hit!
111
00:05:03,267 --> 00:05:05,365
No, no, no, sir, sir.
112
00:05:05,432 --> 00:05:07,598
It's just that
little girl's balloon.
113
00:05:09,499 --> 00:05:10,765
Oh.
114
00:05:10,833 --> 00:05:12,932
Then I'm probably ok!
115
00:05:22,267 --> 00:05:24,698
Gay parade speech.
Gay...
116
00:05:24,766 --> 00:05:27,698
Parade speech.
117
00:05:27,766 --> 00:05:30,698
This is not how I wanted
to spend my evening.
118
00:05:30,766 --> 00:05:32,531
Relax.
We can do this.
119
00:05:32,599 --> 00:05:34,398
You know, it's your
fault we're here,
120
00:05:34,466 --> 00:05:36,431
miss forget to
give the, uh...
121
00:05:36,499 --> 00:05:39,598
Message to... Us two.
122
00:05:39,666 --> 00:05:43,398
I said I was sorry.
Now drop it, ok?
123
00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:52,631
Gay parade speech.
Gay...
124
00:05:52,699 --> 00:05:54,866
Parade speech.
125
00:05:54,933 --> 00:05:58,099
This is not how I wanted
to spend my evening.
126
00:05:58,167 --> 00:05:59,465
I need a break.
127
00:05:59,532 --> 00:06:00,866
Me, too.
128
00:06:04,666 --> 00:06:08,698
Carter, is... is that little dog of
yours still trying to kill himself?
129
00:06:08,766 --> 00:06:12,665
James, that is just Stuart's
twisted sense of humor.
130
00:06:12,733 --> 00:06:16,232
He's chewing on a bottle
of your sleeping pills.
131
00:06:18,566 --> 00:06:21,065
No, no!
132
00:06:21,133 --> 00:06:23,132
Gimme that!
133
00:06:23,199 --> 00:06:25,365
How'd he get in
the medicine cabinet?
134
00:06:25,433 --> 00:06:28,565
Hey, he may be old, but he
still climbs like a puppy.
135
00:06:28,633 --> 00:06:32,032
Just this last week, he was able to get
into the fuse box, the knife drawer,
136
00:06:32,099 --> 00:06:34,832
and the... Microwave.
137
00:06:34,900 --> 00:06:36,365
Come on,
let's watch the tube.
138
00:06:36,433 --> 00:06:39,365
Hey, see if the
telly tubbies are on!
139
00:06:39,433 --> 00:06:41,432
People, people,
though I grant you
140
00:06:41,499 --> 00:06:44,498
procrastination has long been a
useful tool of the successful scribe,
141
00:06:44,566 --> 00:06:48,265
we are under too narrow a time
constraint to utilize that amenity.
142
00:06:48,333 --> 00:06:51,565
If you're through
barfing up a dictionary,
143
00:06:51,633 --> 00:06:54,132
I have one thing
to say to you.
144
00:06:54,199 --> 00:06:57,098
The movie a few good menis on in 2 minutes.
145
00:06:57,166 --> 00:07:00,165
Tch. I've never seen that
movie, and I don't care.
146
00:07:00,233 --> 00:07:03,199
Tom cruise
in a Navy uniform.
147
00:07:07,133 --> 00:07:08,332
Ten hut!
148
00:07:15,266 --> 00:07:17,364
I don't understand what all
this coverage is about.
149
00:07:17,432 --> 00:07:19,099
This was no big deal.
150
00:07:19,166 --> 00:07:22,165
It was horrible, mom. I saw my whole
life flash before my very eyes.
151
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:27,199
Which reminds me, Uncle
Lou still owes me $5.00.
152
00:07:27,266 --> 00:07:29,466
I gotta go.
153
00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:31,765
Paul, I want
my watch back.
154
00:07:31,833 --> 00:07:34,532
Sorry, chief.
You gave it to me.
155
00:07:36,833 --> 00:07:38,699
You didn't have to
walk me to work.
156
00:07:38,766 --> 00:07:40,899
I just wanted to
make sure you're ok.
157
00:07:40,967 --> 00:07:43,199
Buncha balloons popped. Someone
pushed me outta the way. I'm fine.
158
00:07:43,266 --> 00:07:44,199
Hey, Mike, old buddy.
159
00:07:44,266 --> 00:07:45,765
Hey, Arthur, old...
160
00:07:45,833 --> 00:07:47,999
Arthur.
161
00:07:48,066 --> 00:07:49,599
More flowers?
162
00:07:49,666 --> 00:07:53,265
They're not as nice as the ones
she brought home yesterday...
163
00:07:53,333 --> 00:07:54,832
From her mother.
164
00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:56,866
You, uh, kept those
flowers, huh?
165
00:07:56,933 --> 00:07:58,499
Lemme walk you out.
166
00:07:58,566 --> 00:08:01,065
You should have
seen this bouquet.
167
00:08:01,133 --> 00:08:03,998
Yeah, I called my mom and asked
her to back off a little bit,
168
00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:06,032
but she never pays
any attention to me.
169
00:08:06,099 --> 00:08:07,865
Well, leave your mother alone.
She's crazy about you.
170
00:08:07,933 --> 00:08:09,665
You listen to the man.
171
00:08:10,866 --> 00:08:12,765
I'm not goin'
in there, Mike.
172
00:08:12,832 --> 00:08:15,433
All of those strange faces.
I mean, look at that guy.
173
00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:17,165
What's he got
in his hand?
174
00:08:18,766 --> 00:08:22,498
I believe that's one of those
new tricky sandwich guns, sir?
175
00:08:22,566 --> 00:08:24,498
I'm a public figure,
Mike.
176
00:08:24,566 --> 00:08:26,498
Now, I know this
sounds silly to you,
177
00:08:26,566 --> 00:08:28,565
but yesterday made me
feel very vulnerable.
178
00:08:28,632 --> 00:08:31,598
Why all of a sudden now? You've
been the mayor for 3 years.
179
00:08:31,666 --> 00:08:33,998
I used to be married
to Helen.
180
00:08:34,066 --> 00:08:36,165
I didn't care
if I got shot.
181
00:08:36,232 --> 00:08:38,932
Thanks so much
for meeting me, Carter.
182
00:08:38,999 --> 00:08:41,998
Well, if there's one thing
us homosexuals are good for,
183
00:08:42,066 --> 00:08:44,032
it's listening.
184
00:08:44,099 --> 00:08:46,932
We're also pretty good
at decorating,
185
00:08:46,999 --> 00:08:50,198
and, of course,
having sex with men.
186
00:08:50,266 --> 00:08:51,865
But, hey,
that's old news.
187
00:08:51,933 --> 00:08:53,898
Now, what's on
your mind?
188
00:08:55,832 --> 00:08:58,165
I decided to
propose to Nikki.
189
00:08:58,232 --> 00:08:59,765
Oh...
190
00:08:59,832 --> 00:09:01,032
Thank you!
191
00:09:02,666 --> 00:09:05,665
I got reservations at an amazing
bed and breakfast in nantucket.
192
00:09:05,733 --> 00:09:07,298
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
193
00:09:07,366 --> 00:09:08,732
You're kidding, right?
194
00:09:08,799 --> 00:09:10,932
Artie, baby...
195
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:14,399
Nikki hates the mushy,
romantic, girly-man stuff.
196
00:09:14,466 --> 00:09:16,332
Tell me how I can
make her happy.
197
00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,432
Arthur...
198
00:09:18,500 --> 00:09:20,499
This moment belongs
to you and Nikki,
199
00:09:20,566 --> 00:09:24,165
and I'm not gonna get in the
middle, no matter what you say.
200
00:09:24,233 --> 00:09:26,465
Ok!
Well...
201
00:09:26,533 --> 00:09:28,365
the first thing
you're gonna need...
202
00:09:28,433 --> 00:09:30,132
Is a clown suit.
203
00:09:32,033 --> 00:09:35,932
Sir, all I'm saying is you're gonna
have to leave the office eventually.
204
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,365
It's after 11:00.
205
00:09:37,433 --> 00:09:38,465
Actually,
206
00:09:38,533 --> 00:09:41,132
it's 10:53.
207
00:09:41,199 --> 00:09:43,132
Is this
waterproof?
208
00:09:48,566 --> 00:09:53,032
I don't know, Paul. Let's go to
the east river and find out.
209
00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:55,865
You know, Howard Hughes ran his
entire empire from one room,
210
00:09:55,933 --> 00:09:57,865
top of the sands hotel.
211
00:09:57,933 --> 00:10:02,132
Well, sir, Howard Hughes had foot-long
fingernails, and he died of syphilis.
212
00:10:02,199 --> 00:10:05,132
You gotta get out of this office and
go give your gay parade speech.
213
00:10:05,199 --> 00:10:07,865
Mike, I don't even
have the speech.
214
00:10:07,933 --> 00:10:09,765
Carter and James
still have it.
215
00:10:14,266 --> 00:10:17,065
You know what, sir? Why don't I show you
the tape of the waterfront opening?
216
00:10:17,133 --> 00:10:20,032
Confront your fears. You know
what my greatest fear is?
217
00:10:20,100 --> 00:10:23,065
Well, it's not
sweating or annoying people.
218
00:10:28,433 --> 00:10:30,898
How about that? 10:54!
219
00:10:34,100 --> 00:10:35,432
You know, Paul,
you're right.
220
00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:37,432
You're right.
I have to face this.
221
00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:39,365
Sir, I'm gonna
put this on slow mo.
222
00:10:39,433 --> 00:10:42,232
Now you can see how everybody
jumped to protect you.
223
00:11:00,866 --> 00:11:02,531
Ooh.
224
00:11:15,199 --> 00:11:16,899
Hey, janelle,
I'm here to see the mayor.
225
00:11:16,966 --> 00:11:18,398
And you are?
226
00:11:19,866 --> 00:11:21,932
Here to see
the mayor.
227
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,965
I'm sorry, sir, but
he's completely booked.
228
00:11:25,033 --> 00:11:27,865
Janelle... I make
the man's schedule.
229
00:11:27,933 --> 00:11:30,364
He's free until
march.
230
00:11:30,432 --> 00:11:31,799
(WHISPERS)
He's listening.
231
00:11:31,866 --> 00:11:33,099
(KNOCKS ON DOOR)
232
00:11:33,167 --> 00:11:35,032
Come on, sir. We
got a city to run.
233
00:11:35,100 --> 00:11:37,298
The vendors are
threatening to retaliate.
234
00:11:37,365 --> 00:11:39,498
You need your
right-hand man.
235
00:11:39,566 --> 00:11:41,231
You're out! If I'm
out, who's in?
236
00:11:41,299 --> 00:11:43,231
Janelle, Randall and I
have a busy afternoon,
237
00:11:43,299 --> 00:11:47,264
so hold all calls. Mike, we'll try
and fit you in later, all right?
238
00:11:59,866 --> 00:12:01,799
(SNORING)
239
00:12:01,867 --> 00:12:04,032
Watch your hands,
junior!
240
00:12:05,666 --> 00:12:06,799
Sorry.
241
00:12:06,867 --> 00:12:10,331
I was dreaming
I was an apple picker.
242
00:12:13,432 --> 00:12:15,298
Oh, my God!
We're late!
243
00:12:15,366 --> 00:12:16,598
Aah!
244
00:12:16,666 --> 00:12:18,799
Come on! Let's go,
let's go, let's go!
245
00:12:18,867 --> 00:12:20,032
Oh, God!
246
00:12:23,867 --> 00:12:25,799
We never wrote
the speech!
247
00:12:25,867 --> 00:12:28,066
All right, all right, all right,
248
00:12:28,134 --> 00:12:30,365
did you ever oversleep
for a test in college?
249
00:12:30,432 --> 00:12:32,498
Yeah, once, the night before
Professor Franklin's Latin final.
250
00:12:32,566 --> 00:12:34,298
What did you do?
I rolled over and said,
251
00:12:34,366 --> 00:12:36,631
"hey, Professor Franklin,
we're late."
252
00:12:37,633 --> 00:12:39,732
Come on! We gotta
write something!
253
00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:41,099
Ah, ok...
254
00:12:41,167 --> 00:12:43,099
This is just a speech
about gay pride.
255
00:12:43,167 --> 00:12:44,233
This should be easy.
256
00:12:44,299 --> 00:12:46,732
He's right.
He's right.
257
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,066
We have to, uh, we have
to stay calm. Uh...
258
00:12:49,134 --> 00:12:51,531
(SHOUTS) I've got nothing!
Me neither.
259
00:12:51,599 --> 00:12:53,866
You come on! You're gay, you're
proud, and you never shut up.
260
00:12:53,933 --> 00:12:56,032
Start blabbin',
I'll write it down.
261
00:12:56,100 --> 00:12:57,099
This is hopeless.
262
00:12:57,167 --> 00:13:00,233
We are complete
and utter failures.
263
00:13:00,299 --> 00:13:03,432
(SNAPS FINGERS)
Are you getting this?
264
00:13:03,499 --> 00:13:05,799
Damn you, tom cruise!
265
00:13:05,866 --> 00:13:08,165
Damn your winning smile!
266
00:13:12,300 --> 00:13:15,332
Paul, get out. The mayor
and I need to talk.
267
00:13:16,899 --> 00:13:20,865
Mike, anything you have to say to
me, you can say in front of Paul.
268
00:13:20,933 --> 00:13:24,532
Fine. Sir, I think
we should fire Paul.
269
00:13:26,899 --> 00:13:30,665
Mike, we've been watching the
tape of the pier opening again.
270
00:13:30,733 --> 00:13:34,699
Oh, now, now watch this. You see...
If you play it in reverse,
271
00:13:34,766 --> 00:13:37,632
it looks like you're
actually trying to save me.
272
00:13:40,233 --> 00:13:43,165
Oh, no, there you go,
thinking only of yourself.
273
00:13:43,233 --> 00:13:44,799
Care!
274
00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:45,799
Don't care.
275
00:13:45,866 --> 00:13:47,232
Care!
276
00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:50,398
Don't care.
277
00:13:50,466 --> 00:13:51,598
Care!
278
00:13:52,833 --> 00:13:54,699
Don't care.
279
00:13:54,766 --> 00:13:57,598
Sir, I know... I know
what it looked like,
280
00:13:57,666 --> 00:14:00,598
but... Let me assure you, I
am completely there for you.
281
00:14:00,666 --> 00:14:03,099
No one is more devoted
to you than I am.
282
00:14:03,166 --> 00:14:04,331
Paul is.
Right, Paul?
283
00:14:04,399 --> 00:14:05,299
That's right, sir.
284
00:14:05,367 --> 00:14:07,099
Sit, Paul.
285
00:14:07,166 --> 00:14:09,065
See?
Blind obedience.
286
00:14:09,133 --> 00:14:11,099
See, that's the difference
between you and me, Mike.
287
00:14:11,166 --> 00:14:13,099
I would do anything
for this man.
288
00:14:13,166 --> 00:14:14,599
Show him, Paul.
289
00:14:14,666 --> 00:14:16,632
Burn your hand.
290
00:14:25,933 --> 00:14:28,099
You know,
I would, sir...
291
00:14:28,166 --> 00:14:30,099
I don't... I don't
have a lighter.
292
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:37,732
Here you go, smokey.
293
00:14:39,233 --> 00:14:41,665
Look, sir,
all I'm saying is
294
00:14:41,733 --> 00:14:43,965
I don't see...
295
00:14:47,166 --> 00:14:49,866
I don't see why we can't just get
past this and go back to work.
296
00:14:49,933 --> 00:14:52,965
I just thought you might
need a little rest...
297
00:14:53,033 --> 00:14:55,299
After all of that
diving out of the way!
298
00:14:57,166 --> 00:14:59,165
Oh, is that what
you thought?
299
00:14:59,233 --> 00:15:01,199
Yes, that's what
I thought.
300
00:15:02,666 --> 00:15:04,498
Fine.
301
00:15:04,566 --> 00:15:06,032
Fine.
302
00:15:06,799 --> 00:15:08,099
(WHIMPERS) Ow...
303
00:15:08,167 --> 00:15:10,498
I'm gonna need
some medical attention.
304
00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:17,032
Nikki?
305
00:15:17,099 --> 00:15:18,032
Hmm?
306
00:15:18,100 --> 00:15:19,631
Say that thing
again.
307
00:15:19,699 --> 00:15:21,465
What thing?
308
00:15:21,532 --> 00:15:24,598
That thing about how I
can't affect your life.
309
00:15:25,933 --> 00:15:28,865
There is nothing
you can do or say
310
00:15:28,933 --> 00:15:32,498
that will ever again have any
kind of consequence on my life.
311
00:15:32,566 --> 00:15:36,665
(HONK HONK HONK HONK)
312
00:15:40,100 --> 00:15:41,531
Nikki...
313
00:15:41,599 --> 00:15:48,032
Will you marry me?
314
00:15:48,100 --> 00:15:50,565
Why are you
in a clown suit?
315
00:15:50,632 --> 00:15:53,565
Carter told me how your
grandfather was a clown and...
316
00:15:53,632 --> 00:15:55,365
(YELLS)
That's not Carter!
317
00:15:56,566 --> 00:16:00,399
It's over...
When I say it's over!
318
00:16:06,099 --> 00:16:10,698
Hey, I don't mind making a fool
of myself in front of you.
319
00:16:15,033 --> 00:16:18,399
I love you more than anything
else in this world, Nikki.
320
00:16:19,799 --> 00:16:21,765
Will ya marry me?
321
00:16:23,299 --> 00:16:24,399
Wow.
322
00:16:26,099 --> 00:16:29,032
You really think she's
gonna marry that bozo?
323
00:16:39,799 --> 00:16:41,532
Hey, sir.
324
00:16:41,599 --> 00:16:44,032
I just came
to drop these off.
325
00:16:44,099 --> 00:16:46,965
I'll have Paul pick them
up later when he, um...
326
00:16:47,033 --> 00:16:50,065
Comes back from the emergency room.
You ok, Mike?
327
00:16:50,133 --> 00:16:54,332
You ever felt like you're
losing someone, sir,
328
00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:58,298
someone you really care for, and there's
not a thing you can do about it?
329
00:16:58,366 --> 00:17:00,032
Aw, come on.
330
00:17:00,099 --> 00:17:02,131
Things aren't
that bad.
331
00:17:02,199 --> 00:17:04,264
It's just those words...
332
00:17:04,332 --> 00:17:06,066
I love you. I...
333
00:17:06,132 --> 00:17:09,066
Every time I've wanted to
say I love you to someone
334
00:17:09,132 --> 00:17:12,032
that I can't imagine a day
without seeing their face,
335
00:17:12,099 --> 00:17:14,498
it just always
comes out as...
336
00:17:14,566 --> 00:17:16,398
I'll see ya later.
337
00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:20,732
The worst part is that
I'm the one who's caused
338
00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:22,732
all the problems
in the relationship.
339
00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:25,799
I keep finding myself saying,
"I hope they say it first."
340
00:17:29,033 --> 00:17:30,632
I love you, Mike.
341
00:17:39,033 --> 00:17:40,699
Excuse me, sir?
342
00:17:40,766 --> 00:17:43,498
I love you, Mike.
343
00:17:43,566 --> 00:17:45,932
I was talking
about a woman.
344
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:47,364
Oh.
345
00:17:47,432 --> 00:17:48,899
I see.
346
00:17:48,967 --> 00:17:50,932
Don't... don't get me
wrong, sir.
347
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,966
I... I... our relationship
means the world to me.
348
00:17:54,033 --> 00:17:56,331
I would do anything
for you.
349
00:17:56,399 --> 00:17:57,632
And?
350
00:17:57,700 --> 00:18:00,431
And that's how
I feel.
351
00:18:00,499 --> 00:18:02,098
Hell with it.
352
00:18:02,166 --> 00:18:03,831
Mr. mayor...
353
00:18:03,899 --> 00:18:07,465
you have any idea how much it
hurts to say to someone...
354
00:18:07,533 --> 00:18:09,965
I love you...
355
00:18:10,033 --> 00:18:12,065
(VOICE BREAKS)
And not hear it back?
356
00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:14,965
Sir, it's just
those words, sir.
357
00:18:15,033 --> 00:18:16,198
Sir, I...
358
00:18:18,599 --> 00:18:20,565
I'll see ya later!
359
00:18:22,599 --> 00:18:25,665
You say you don't want me
in that gay pride parade.
360
00:18:25,732 --> 00:18:30,465
Well, I say... Deep down in places
you don't talk about at parties,
361
00:18:30,533 --> 00:18:32,565
you want me
on that float.
362
00:18:32,633 --> 00:18:34,632
You need me on that float.
363
00:18:34,699 --> 00:18:38,365
This is my
favorite part.
364
00:18:38,432 --> 00:18:40,865
Sir, we're looking for a
simple... you want answers?
365
00:18:40,932 --> 00:18:42,731
I think I'm entitled.
You want answers?
366
00:18:42,799 --> 00:18:43,831
I want the truth!
367
00:18:43,899 --> 00:18:45,865
You can't handle
the truth!
368
00:18:50,299 --> 00:18:51,731
Mike.
369
00:18:51,799 --> 00:18:52,931
Hey.
370
00:18:52,999 --> 00:18:54,532
Hey.
371
00:18:54,599 --> 00:18:56,865
I'm going away
with Arthur.
372
00:18:56,932 --> 00:18:58,532
Oh. So...
373
00:18:58,599 --> 00:19:00,465
All right,
so you're gonna go.
374
00:19:00,533 --> 00:19:02,032
So that means
you probably...
375
00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:03,232
yeah. Yeah.
Probably.
376
00:19:03,299 --> 00:19:04,865
Nikki...
377
00:19:04,933 --> 00:19:07,665
you know, Mike, I don't think we
should even talk about it really.
378
00:19:07,733 --> 00:19:08,865
Hey, Mr. mayor!
Nikki, wait...
379
00:19:08,933 --> 00:19:11,565
you don't like hot dogs?
380
00:19:11,633 --> 00:19:13,465
Try one with everything!
381
00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:27,332
Hey! Hey!
382
00:19:29,266 --> 00:19:32,232
That was
very brave, Mike.
383
00:19:34,033 --> 00:19:35,798
I love you, sir.
384
00:19:37,033 --> 00:19:40,898
I have been waiting years
to hear those words.
385
00:19:44,833 --> 00:19:47,199
I love you, too, sir.
386
00:19:47,266 --> 00:19:48,665
Shut up, Paul.
387
00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:54,699
(POP POP POP)
388
00:19:54,766 --> 00:19:56,432
Good night, man.
389
00:19:58,266 --> 00:19:59,898
You know what
I don't get?
390
00:19:59,966 --> 00:20:02,032
You'd jump in front
of a bullet
391
00:20:02,100 --> 00:20:05,532
to protect someone you
really loved in a second.
392
00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:08,199
I took a day off.
393
00:20:20,533 --> 00:20:22,199
That was you.
394
00:20:25,533 --> 00:20:26,965
Hey.
395
00:20:27,033 --> 00:20:28,965
Nikki, I thought
you were...
396
00:20:29,033 --> 00:20:31,165
Going to, uh...
397
00:20:41,533 --> 00:20:43,498
Wow.
398
00:20:43,566 --> 00:20:46,532
I think maybe I
should go tell Arthur
399
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:48,632
I'm not gonna go
away with him.
400
00:20:58,033 --> 00:21:00,165
I think maybe
you should.
401
00:21:09,033 --> 00:21:10,564
See ya later.
402
00:21:10,632 --> 00:21:12,398
Me, too.
403
00:21:19,599 --> 00:21:21,032
Hey, Mike.
404
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:24,032
I see by this schedule
405
00:21:24,100 --> 00:21:26,698
I got a press conference
at the sewage treatment plant.
406
00:21:26,766 --> 00:21:28,531
Well, not at.
407
00:21:30,267 --> 00:21:31,865
In.
408
00:21:32,866 --> 00:21:34,266
Would you like
your watch back?
409
00:21:34,332 --> 00:21:36,331
Very much.
410
00:21:37,699 --> 00:21:38,631
Paul.
411
00:21:38,699 --> 00:21:40,766
The real one.
412
00:21:47,299 --> 00:21:48,899
Oh, and Paul...
413
00:21:50,332 --> 00:21:52,799
If you burn yourself
on purpose,
414
00:21:52,866 --> 00:21:54,865
you don't get
workman's comp.
415
00:21:57,599 --> 00:21:59,132
MAN: Sit, ubu, sit.Good dog.
416
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:00,331
(BARKING)
417
00:22:01,933 --> 00:22:02,999
Moo.
418
00:22:03,049 --> 00:22:07,599
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