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1
00:00:14,915 --> 00:00:16,960
Sarge, I tell you,
you're wasting your time.
2
00:00:16,984 --> 00:00:19,029
Well, all I know is, that
business in that saloon
3
00:00:19,053 --> 00:00:20,413
has fallen off 50 percent.
4
00:00:20,437 --> 00:00:22,716
Now, we gotta find some
way to get those troopers back.
5
00:00:22,740 --> 00:00:24,618
Maybe we ought to stop
watering the whiskey.
6
00:00:24,642 --> 00:00:26,402
Ha, ha, ha.
7
00:00:31,866 --> 00:00:33,448
Where are you?
8
00:00:45,146 --> 00:00:47,490
Well, I'm not asking you
how to run my business.
9
00:00:47,514 --> 00:00:50,176
Now, look, the captain still
think Pete owns that saloon.
10
00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:52,079
You just back up whatever I say.
11
00:00:52,103 --> 00:00:54,636
Okay, sarge, but
he said no before.
12
00:00:58,125 --> 00:00:59,724
Come in.
13
00:01:04,031 --> 00:01:05,031
Captain.
14
00:01:07,851 --> 00:01:10,547
At ease, men. I'm
just sealing this letter.
15
00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:12,782
Right, sir. There. There we are.
16
00:01:12,806 --> 00:01:13,806
Now, what...?
17
00:01:16,193 --> 00:01:18,704
Now, what can I do for you, men?
18
00:01:18,728 --> 00:01:20,873
Well, sir, we've come on
behalf of good old Pete.
19
00:01:20,897 --> 00:01:21,892
Good old Pete?
20
00:01:21,916 --> 00:01:23,343
The bartender
over at the saloon.
21
00:01:23,367 --> 00:01:24,911
The widower. With nine children.
22
00:01:24,935 --> 00:01:26,128
All with rickets.
23
00:01:26,152 --> 00:01:29,282
Oh, no, I'm awfully
sorry to hear that.
24
00:01:29,306 --> 00:01:31,451
Maybe we could take some
money out of the troop fund
25
00:01:31,475 --> 00:01:32,702
and give him a hand.
26
00:01:32,726 --> 00:01:34,704
Oh, no, sir. He would
never accept charity.
27
00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:36,673
What does he
want? Dancing girls.
28
00:01:36,697 --> 00:01:38,558
Dancing girls? For rickets?
29
00:01:38,582 --> 00:01:39,742
You don't understand, sir.
30
00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:41,444
You see, Pete could
triple his business
31
00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:43,913
if you would just allow
him to have dancing girls.
32
00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:45,715
That's right. Their shapely legs
33
00:01:45,739 --> 00:01:47,450
could get his
kids' legs in shape.
34
00:01:47,474 --> 00:01:50,737
Sergeant, you know
that I have always felt
35
00:01:50,761 --> 00:01:52,655
that there is no
place at Fort Courage
36
00:01:52,679 --> 00:01:53,840
for this sort of thing.
37
00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:56,092
It's a distracting
element for the troops.
38
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,862
Sir, I think it's very important
for the morale of the troops.
39
00:01:58,886 --> 00:02:02,015
I mean, there's nothing better
after a long day of soldiering
40
00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:03,366
than to relax with a beer
41
00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:05,501
and to soak up a
little entertainment.
42
00:02:05,525 --> 00:02:08,188
What if we should
have an...? Oh. Here.
43
00:02:08,212 --> 00:02:10,590
What if we should have
a surprise Indian attack?
44
00:02:10,614 --> 00:02:12,458
Well, we'd surprise them, sir.
45
00:02:12,482 --> 00:02:13,977
None of our men
would be in the fort.
46
00:02:14,001 --> 00:02:15,612
They'd all be
over at the saloon.
47
00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:19,065
Ah, but did it ever occur to you
they would attack the saloon?
48
00:02:19,089 --> 00:02:20,750
They'd be playing
into our hands, sir.
49
00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:22,318
An Indian with a
tomahawk is no match
50
00:02:22,342 --> 00:02:24,003
for a girl with
taps on her shoes.
51
00:02:24,027 --> 00:02:26,205
Yes, sir. All things
being considered.
52
00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:28,374
I mean, Pete trying to
make a living for his family.
53
00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:30,143
The kids with their
rickety little legs.
54
00:02:30,167 --> 00:02:32,579
The morale of F Troop. Well...
55
00:02:32,603 --> 00:02:35,565
Actually, there is nothing
in the manual about it.
56
00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:37,367
That's right, sir,
nothing in the manual.
57
00:02:37,391 --> 00:02:39,769
It's for a good cause.
Yes, it is for a good cause.
58
00:02:39,793 --> 00:02:42,072
Where does Pete expect
to get these dancing girls?
59
00:02:42,096 --> 00:02:43,323
From Dodge City, sir.
60
00:02:43,347 --> 00:02:45,747
It's part of our cultural
exchange program.
61
00:02:46,566 --> 00:02:48,311
Well, thank you very much, sir.
62
00:02:48,335 --> 00:02:50,747
I am sure that you
will never regret this.
63
00:03:04,734 --> 00:03:08,431
Sarge, you did it.
You are beautiful.
64
00:03:08,455 --> 00:03:11,084
Just stick with me, pal.
This is only the beginning.
65
00:03:17,948 --> 00:03:19,542
Whoa.
66
00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:21,611
Oh, excuse me, soldiers,
is this where I find
67
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:23,379
the military
governor of the town?
68
00:03:23,403 --> 00:03:25,915
Yeah, right in there. Captain
Parmenter's his name.
69
00:03:25,939 --> 00:03:28,151
Are you a stranger in
these parts, stranger?
70
00:03:28,175 --> 00:03:29,452
Yes, but not for long.
71
00:03:29,476 --> 00:03:31,304
I'm Dan Larson, the
new owner of the saloon.
72
00:03:31,328 --> 00:03:32,805
Why don't you
drop around tonight?
73
00:03:32,829 --> 00:03:33,990
Drinks are on the house.
74
00:03:34,014 --> 00:03:36,058
Well, thank you,
Mr.Larson. Very nice of you...
75
00:03:36,082 --> 00:03:37,710
New owner of the saloon?!
76
00:03:37,734 --> 00:03:40,046
Hey! What are you talking about?
77
00:03:40,070 --> 00:03:43,616
Oh, you must be
Sergeant O'Rourke,
78
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,301
former holder of this lease.
79
00:03:45,325 --> 00:03:46,803
How'd you get that?
80
00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:49,271
When the owner of the
building turned down my bid,
81
00:03:49,295 --> 00:03:50,890
he made the
mistake of telling me
82
00:03:50,914 --> 00:03:53,026
he was leasing to a
soldier on active duty,
83
00:03:53,050 --> 00:03:54,494
the rest was easy.
84
00:03:54,518 --> 00:03:57,463
Listen, we got no room here at
Fort Courage for blackmailers.
85
00:03:57,487 --> 00:04:00,833
Oh, come now, sergeant,
every town needs a crook.
86
00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:07,696
Oh, uh, the offer of drinks
on the house still goes.
87
00:05:32,198 --> 00:05:34,577
Oh, hi, Wild Eagle. Hi, Crazy.
88
00:05:34,601 --> 00:05:35,945
O'Rourke.
89
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,364
Hi, Chief. Hi, Craze.
90
00:05:37,388 --> 00:05:40,516
We've been expecting you.
Have some of whiskey ready.
91
00:05:40,540 --> 00:05:42,919
Squaws have been
working their feet to the bone.
92
00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:45,087
Have been operating
still round the sundial.
93
00:05:45,111 --> 00:05:47,456
Well, that's fine, but I
can't take delivery right now.
94
00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:48,575
I just lost the saloon.
95
00:05:48,599 --> 00:05:50,443
Please, sergeant,
don't make jokes.
96
00:05:50,467 --> 00:05:52,778
Hekawis have no sense of humor.
97
00:05:52,802 --> 00:05:55,899
The Navajos are the
laughers. Yeah, yeah, Navajos.
98
00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:57,434
They a million laughs.
99
00:05:57,458 --> 00:05:59,185
He's not joking.
100
00:05:59,209 --> 00:06:01,020
Some guy come into
town and found out
101
00:06:01,044 --> 00:06:03,189
the sarge was running
the saloon illegally
102
00:06:03,213 --> 00:06:05,225
and took over the
lease by blackmail.
103
00:06:05,249 --> 00:06:07,927
Yeah, Larson's his name.
And larceny's his game.
104
00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:09,562
You got dirty deal, O'Rourke.
105
00:06:09,586 --> 00:06:11,931
Wild Eagle hate man
who do a thing like that.
106
00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:14,033
Nothing worse than crook.
107
00:06:14,057 --> 00:06:16,403
Where this man now?
Now, wait a minute, chief.
108
00:06:16,427 --> 00:06:18,238
I don't want you to
go on the warpath.
109
00:06:18,262 --> 00:06:19,489
What warpath?
110
00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:21,579
Want to sell him the whiskey.
111
00:06:22,532 --> 00:06:24,460
That's a fine thing, chief.
112
00:06:24,484 --> 00:06:25,694
I thought you always said
113
00:06:25,718 --> 00:06:27,580
the sarge and me
was like sons to you.
114
00:06:27,604 --> 00:06:30,066
I just put you up for adoption.
115
00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:33,686
Maybe Shoshones take you?
Yeah, they crazy about kids.
116
00:06:33,710 --> 00:06:36,055
Chief, you gotta help
me get my saloon back.
117
00:06:36,079 --> 00:06:38,591
If you don't sell your
whiskey to this blackmailer,
118
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:40,226
it'll drive him out of business.
119
00:06:40,250 --> 00:06:41,677
How long you think that take?
120
00:06:41,701 --> 00:06:44,264
Believe me, chief, he'll be
out of town in two moons.
121
00:06:44,288 --> 00:06:46,332
Make it a moon and a
half and you got a deal.
122
00:06:46,356 --> 00:06:48,117
Fair enough, and if
he's not gone by then,
123
00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:49,435
I pay for the whiskey.
124
00:06:49,459 --> 00:06:50,636
Someone coming.
125
00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:53,139
You can bet me it's Larson.
126
00:06:53,163 --> 00:06:54,779
It's Larson, all right.
127
00:06:56,449 --> 00:06:57,943
Whoa.
128
00:06:57,967 --> 00:06:59,812
Him not look like crook.
129
00:06:59,836 --> 00:07:01,097
Can't go by face.
130
00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:03,683
Sergeant O'Rourke
not look like one either.
131
00:07:03,707 --> 00:07:05,985
Don't bother getting
off your wagon, Larson.
132
00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:08,054
You can't buy a
drop of whiskey here.
133
00:07:08,078 --> 00:07:09,071
That's right.
134
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,356
The Hekawis are our friends
135
00:07:10,380 --> 00:07:12,358
and they don't do
business with blackmailers.
136
00:07:12,382 --> 00:07:15,227
You tell him, chief. Sergeant
O'Rourke speak truth.
137
00:07:15,251 --> 00:07:18,113
Hekawis very loyal
people. Poor, but loyal.
138
00:07:18,137 --> 00:07:21,234
Never break word. Friendship
mean more than money.
139
00:07:21,258 --> 00:07:23,969
Nothing you say can
make me sell you whiskey.
140
00:07:23,993 --> 00:07:25,337
That's very admirable, chief.
141
00:07:25,361 --> 00:07:26,856
At least make offer.
142
00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:29,025
Wild Eagle. Six dollars a case.
143
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:30,309
We deliver anywhere.
144
00:07:30,333 --> 00:07:32,312
I'm surprised at you, Craze.
145
00:07:32,336 --> 00:07:34,314
Oh, I didn't come up
here to buy any whiskey.
146
00:07:34,338 --> 00:07:35,331
You didn't?
147
00:07:35,355 --> 00:07:36,849
No, I thought perhaps the chief
148
00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:38,417
would like to buy some of mine.
149
00:07:38,441 --> 00:07:39,869
You got whiskey?
150
00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:41,209
All I could use.
151
00:07:43,547 --> 00:07:45,975
There it is. Blackfoot bourbon.
152
00:07:45,999 --> 00:07:49,362
Apache ale, Comanche
cognac and Shawnee sherry.
153
00:07:49,386 --> 00:07:52,916
Well, good day, gentlemen.
I have to dash back.
154
00:07:52,940 --> 00:07:54,617
Grand opening tonight, you know.
155
00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:58,237
Hope you'll all be there to
see my line of dancing girls.
156
00:08:03,416 --> 00:08:05,395
Dancing girls? Dancing girls?
157
00:08:05,419 --> 00:08:08,397
Dancing girls? Now, now, Jane.
158
00:08:08,421 --> 00:08:10,266
You, as military
governor of this fort,
159
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:11,934
would stand by
and let a stranger
160
00:08:11,958 --> 00:08:13,987
run the saloon with
10 dancing girls?
161
00:08:14,011 --> 00:08:15,455
Twelve, but who's counting?
162
00:08:15,479 --> 00:08:17,356
I just bet you know
how many there are.
163
00:08:17,380 --> 00:08:19,992
You probably couldn't wait
to go over there and greet 'em.
164
00:08:20,016 --> 00:08:21,727
Now, Jane, as military governor,
165
00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,379
it was my duty to
check their costumes
166
00:08:23,403 --> 00:08:25,581
and see that they were
not going to be scantily clad.
167
00:08:25,605 --> 00:08:27,383
Well, are they gonna
be scantily clad?
168
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:28,734
Not now.
169
00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:30,119
Wilton Parmenter.
170
00:08:30,143 --> 00:08:32,288
Oh, now, Jane, you're
getting upset over nothing.
171
00:08:32,312 --> 00:08:34,907
Why, I think Fort Courage
is ready for dancing girls.
172
00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:36,458
And I think it's indecent.
173
00:08:36,482 --> 00:08:37,844
Now, Janey, don't be a prude.
174
00:08:37,868 --> 00:08:39,746
Why, at rehearsal
this afternoon...
175
00:08:39,770 --> 00:08:41,097
At rehearsal?
176
00:08:41,121 --> 00:08:42,598
I had to check the dance too.
177
00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:45,518
And all they were doing was
this new dance from France, see?
178
00:08:45,542 --> 00:08:47,369
It's called the
cancan. Now, watch.
179
00:08:47,393 --> 00:08:50,289
♪ Da, da, da Yum ba-bum ♪
180
00:08:50,313 --> 00:08:51,774
♪ Bum, bum, bum Bum ba-bum ♪
181
00:08:51,798 --> 00:08:53,542
Now, is there anything
wrong with that?
182
00:08:53,566 --> 00:08:55,646
Not when you're
wearing a cavalry uniform.
183
00:08:57,471 --> 00:09:00,371
♪ Bum ba-bum, shh Bum, shh... ♪
184
00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:04,453
Oh, sorry, sir. We didn't
know you were busy.
185
00:09:04,477 --> 00:09:05,905
Oh, no, no, that's all right.
186
00:09:05,929 --> 00:09:07,840
Sir, we can come
back at intermission.
187
00:09:07,864 --> 00:09:09,058
No. No.
188
00:09:09,082 --> 00:09:10,927
As a matter of fact,
I'm glad you're here
189
00:09:10,951 --> 00:09:13,428
because Jane and I were just
discussing the dancing girls.
190
00:09:13,452 --> 00:09:14,747
I think it's shameful.
191
00:09:14,771 --> 00:09:15,798
You do?
192
00:09:15,822 --> 00:09:17,132
Yes, I do, O'Rourke.
193
00:09:17,156 --> 00:09:19,401
Now... Now, sergeant,
explain to Jane
194
00:09:19,425 --> 00:09:21,637
why we need dancing
girls at Fort Courage.
195
00:09:21,661 --> 00:09:23,773
But I don't think we
should have them, sir.
196
00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:26,175
I mean, I... I agree
completely with Jane.
197
00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:29,061
You do? Well, what
about Pete the bartender?
198
00:09:29,085 --> 00:09:32,148
Didn't you tell me his children
were suffering from rickets?
199
00:09:32,172 --> 00:09:34,099
Not rickets, sir. Crickets.
200
00:09:34,123 --> 00:09:35,968
Crickets? O'ROURKE:
That's right, sir.
201
00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:37,286
They had the house surrounded.
202
00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:38,921
The children
couldn't get any sleep.
203
00:09:38,945 --> 00:09:40,306
But that's all over, sir.
204
00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:41,523
They burned the fields,
205
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:43,987
and now those kids
are sleeping like babies.
206
00:09:45,035 --> 00:09:48,097
What about our cultural
exchange program with Dodge City?
207
00:09:48,121 --> 00:09:49,832
Dodge City, sir, is a sin city.
208
00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:53,486
Do you realize that they have
40 saloons and one school?
209
00:09:53,510 --> 00:09:56,772
And they serve
whiskey there too.
210
00:09:56,796 --> 00:09:59,108
Now, Wilton, what are
you gonna do about this?
211
00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:01,794
I've already given permission
for the girls to dance.
212
00:10:01,818 --> 00:10:03,079
Sir, if there are no troopers,
213
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:04,747
there'll be no
business in the saloon.
214
00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:06,065
And if there's no business,
215
00:10:06,089 --> 00:10:09,985
this, uh, undesirable element
will be forced to leave town.
216
00:10:10,009 --> 00:10:12,971
And here come the
troopers into town.
217
00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,392
Captain, you better
do something fast.
218
00:10:16,416 --> 00:10:18,376
Those men are
headed for the saloon.
219
00:10:21,905 --> 00:10:22,898
Halt.
220
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:24,756
Hey, halt! Oof.
221
00:10:27,677 --> 00:10:30,589
Oh, captain.
222
00:10:30,613 --> 00:10:33,308
Are you all right, sir?
Yes, yes, I'm fine. I'm fine.
223
00:10:33,332 --> 00:10:34,694
All right, troop, fall in!
224
00:10:34,718 --> 00:10:38,298
The captain has something
important to say to you.
225
00:10:38,322 --> 00:10:41,984
Men, this is your
captain speaking.
226
00:10:42,008 --> 00:10:43,135
I would like to announce
227
00:10:43,159 --> 00:10:45,671
that you are all
restricted to the fort.
228
00:10:45,695 --> 00:10:49,642
No one will be allowed
in town until further notice.
229
00:10:51,702 --> 00:10:54,146
How dare you give your
captain the grumbles!
230
00:10:54,170 --> 00:10:56,766
Take over, sergeant. Yes, sir.
231
00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:59,768
All right, everybody,
back to the fort.
232
00:10:59,792 --> 00:11:02,004
Hey, sarge, how come
the captain won't let us
233
00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:03,439
come to town no more?
234
00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:06,475
Because horse soldiers
and dancing girls don't mix.
235
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:09,395
The captain made his mind
up awful sudden-like, O'Rourke.
236
00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,197
I'll bet this was all your idea.
237
00:11:11,221 --> 00:11:13,132
No, it was our idea.
238
00:11:13,156 --> 00:11:15,636
All right, get a move on.
239
00:11:17,794 --> 00:11:20,890
Sarge, they're mad at us.
240
00:11:20,914 --> 00:11:22,541
Ah, they'll get over it.
241
00:11:22,565 --> 00:11:24,009
Well, just the same.
242
00:11:24,033 --> 00:11:28,281
Let's not have any target
practice for at least 24 hours.
243
00:11:32,742 --> 00:11:35,604
Dobbs, would you please
show me how to blow the bugle?
244
00:11:35,628 --> 00:11:37,673
I've always wanted to
learn how to blow the bugle
245
00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:39,047
and you're just about the...
246
00:11:41,768 --> 00:11:44,647
Duffy, please tell me the
story of the Alamo again.
247
00:11:44,671 --> 00:11:46,082
Let me see if I got it right.
248
00:11:46,106 --> 00:11:47,633
There you were
with Davy Crockett,
249
00:11:47,657 --> 00:11:50,341
and Santa Anna
came charging across...
250
00:11:52,095 --> 00:11:54,757
Vanderbilt, old pal.
You've lost a lot of weight.
251
00:11:54,781 --> 00:11:56,230
Please tell me how you did it.
252
00:11:59,885 --> 00:12:01,330
Hey, Agarn. Yes!
253
00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:02,582
Oh, it's you, sarge.
254
00:12:02,606 --> 00:12:04,383
I'm going over the
things we're gonna need
255
00:12:04,407 --> 00:12:06,101
when we get the
saloon back from Larson.
256
00:12:06,125 --> 00:12:08,504
Sarge, the men have been
giving me the silent treatment.
257
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:10,273
They've been giving
it to me too, so what?
258
00:12:10,297 --> 00:12:11,357
Now, look, it's a cinch.
259
00:12:11,381 --> 00:12:13,225
After two days of
restriction to this fort,
260
00:12:13,249 --> 00:12:15,695
the guys are gonna drink
more than six cases of whiskey.
261
00:12:15,719 --> 00:12:17,296
So we gotta get
word to Wild Eagle.
262
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:19,599
Sarge, maybe you don't
mind the men not talking to you,
263
00:12:19,623 --> 00:12:21,117
but I can't take it. I'm...
264
00:12:21,141 --> 00:12:22,534
Well, I'm the sensitive type.
265
00:12:22,558 --> 00:12:24,436
Agarn, I'm talking to you.
266
00:12:24,460 --> 00:12:27,189
Sarge, it's not enough. I
want my buddies to talk to me.
267
00:12:27,213 --> 00:12:30,777
Dobbs, old buddy, talk to
me. Say something. Anything.
268
00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:36,299
You see that, sarge?
Did you see that?
269
00:12:36,323 --> 00:12:38,467
He hates me. They all hate me.
270
00:12:38,491 --> 00:12:40,102
Oh, come on,
stop carrying on so.
271
00:12:40,126 --> 00:12:41,654
It's only for a little while.
272
00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:43,923
Why don't you go hit
your bunk. Get some rest.
273
00:12:43,947 --> 00:12:45,758
You're right. You're right.
274
00:13:02,082 --> 00:13:05,444
So this beautiful señorita
comes up to me and says:
275
00:13:05,468 --> 00:13:09,604
"My name is
Conchita." And I said...
276
00:13:10,990 --> 00:13:13,685
So this beautiful señorita
comes up to me and says:
277
00:13:13,709 --> 00:13:15,238
"My name is Conchita."
278
00:13:16,813 --> 00:13:18,791
That's the funniest
thing I ever heard.
279
00:13:18,815 --> 00:13:20,459
That's a knee-slapper,
Duffy. Ha, ha.
280
00:13:20,483 --> 00:13:22,984
I'll finish the
story later, men.
281
00:13:25,905 --> 00:13:27,454
Vanderbilt.
282
00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:30,253
Polly want a cracker?
283
00:13:30,277 --> 00:13:32,743
Polly want a cracker.
284
00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:36,030
Polly want a cracker?
285
00:13:37,667 --> 00:13:40,501
You gotta speak to me,
Polly. Say something.
286
00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:45,656
You've poisoned this
parrot's mind against me.
287
00:13:46,810 --> 00:13:48,988
Dobbs, you gotta talk to me.
288
00:13:49,012 --> 00:13:51,523
Say anything to me, Dobbs.
Anything or I'll go crazy.
289
00:13:51,547 --> 00:13:53,943
You don't wanna see a man
go crazy, do you, Dobbs?
290
00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:55,761
I tell you I'll go crazy, Dobbs.
291
00:13:55,785 --> 00:13:58,680
Crazy. Dobbs, Dobbs.
292
00:13:58,704 --> 00:14:02,885
Dobbs, you can't do this to
me. Dobbs, I am your buddy.
293
00:14:02,909 --> 00:14:04,853
Dobbs, say anything to me.
294
00:14:04,877 --> 00:14:06,305
Well, say something
to me, Dobbs.
295
00:14:06,329 --> 00:14:08,407
Say something. Anything, Dobbs.
296
00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:10,843
Dobbs. Dobbs. Agarn?
297
00:14:10,867 --> 00:14:13,762
You said something to me,
Dobbs. You said my name.
298
00:14:13,786 --> 00:14:16,704
What is it, Dobbs? What is
it? You're standing on my foot.
299
00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:22,504
I'm sorry, Dobbs. I'll
fix that up in a minute.
300
00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:24,106
I've got some good
polish over here.
301
00:14:24,130 --> 00:14:25,491
Won't take any time at all.
302
00:14:25,515 --> 00:14:27,393
It'll be beautiful,
Dobbs. Be just like new.
303
00:14:27,417 --> 00:14:29,278
You'll love it, Dobbs.
You'll just love it.
304
00:14:29,302 --> 00:14:31,046
Agarn? Yes, Duffy?
305
00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:33,749
Anything I can do for you,
Duffy? Polish your boots?
306
00:14:33,773 --> 00:14:36,602
Press your uniform? Trim
your mustache? Name it.
307
00:14:36,626 --> 00:14:38,237
Agarn, if you want
us to talk to you,
308
00:14:38,261 --> 00:14:39,822
there's something
you can do for us.
309
00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:42,358
What is it, Duffy?
Name it. Anything.
310
00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:45,611
Figure out a way we can get into
town to see those dancing girls.
311
00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:47,045
Yeah.
312
00:14:47,069 --> 00:14:52,489
If I did that, the sarge would
never speak to me again.
313
00:14:54,444 --> 00:14:57,573
Oh, well, there's
only one of him
314
00:14:57,597 --> 00:15:00,225
and there's 12 of
you and a parrot.
315
00:15:13,663 --> 00:15:15,078
Aha! Ha!
316
00:15:22,471 --> 00:15:24,271
Come on.
317
00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:58,133
All right, you men, look alive.
318
00:15:58,157 --> 00:16:00,886
I want the area in front of the
captain's quarters cleaned up,
319
00:16:00,910 --> 00:16:01,904
is that clear?
320
00:16:01,928 --> 00:16:03,110
Now, let's go.
321
00:16:09,719 --> 00:16:11,435
All right, men, into the wagon.
322
00:16:12,738 --> 00:16:14,538
Hey, move to the right.
323
00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:34,269
I'll see you for dinner, Wilton.
324
00:16:34,293 --> 00:16:35,554
Thanks for the strawberries.
325
00:16:35,578 --> 00:16:37,406
You're welcome,
Wilton. Hi, Jane.
326
00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:38,574
Hi, Agarn.
327
00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:40,392
Uh, allow me to help
you in the wagon.
328
00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:42,461
Why, thank you, Agarn.
329
00:16:42,485 --> 00:16:44,405
Oh, Jane. Yes, Wilton?
330
00:16:46,222 --> 00:16:48,049
You, uh, forgot your basket.
331
00:16:48,073 --> 00:16:50,285
Oh, well, just throw it
in the wagon, Wilton.
332
00:16:50,309 --> 00:16:51,609
Oh.
333
00:16:58,284 --> 00:16:59,300
Corporal...
334
00:17:00,986 --> 00:17:02,597
What were the men
doing in that wagon?
335
00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:05,367
Searching it, sir.
336
00:17:05,391 --> 00:17:07,202
Now, why would they
be searching my wagon?
337
00:17:07,226 --> 00:17:08,553
Jane, that's a military secret.
338
00:17:08,577 --> 00:17:10,022
Now, see here, corporal.
339
00:17:10,046 --> 00:17:12,524
It's obvious that those men
were trying to sneak into town.
340
00:17:12,548 --> 00:17:14,760
Yeah, right here!
341
00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:18,113
Agarn, I want you to throw
these men in the guardhouse.
342
00:17:18,137 --> 00:17:19,815
What seems to be
the trouble, sergeant?
343
00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:22,251
Well, sir, I caught Duffy
crawling into the cannon
344
00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:24,986
and Dobbs was gonna
shoot him over the wall.
345
00:17:25,010 --> 00:17:27,773
It's obvious, sergeant,
that this confinement
346
00:17:27,797 --> 00:17:30,276
is breaking down the
morale of my troop.
347
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:33,295
Men, this is your
captain speaking.
348
00:17:33,319 --> 00:17:36,481
As of now, I am
rescinding the order
349
00:17:36,505 --> 00:17:38,417
restricting you to the fort.
350
00:17:38,441 --> 00:17:39,768
What's that mean?
351
00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:41,253
It means that now
we can go to town
352
00:17:41,277 --> 00:17:42,810
and see them dancing girls.
353
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,892
Hip, hip... ALL: Hooray!
354
00:17:46,916 --> 00:17:49,094
Hip, hip... ALL: Hooray!
355
00:17:49,118 --> 00:17:51,079
Hip hip... MEN: Hooray!
356
00:17:51,103 --> 00:17:52,480
What are you cheering for?
357
00:17:52,504 --> 00:17:54,322
Nothing, sarge, I
just like to cheer.
358
00:18:02,599 --> 00:18:03,992
Come on, hey.
359
00:18:04,016 --> 00:18:05,594
All right, come on.
360
00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:07,463
Take it easy,
be a little patient.
361
00:18:07,487 --> 00:18:10,332
Everybody'll get their table.
Now, just be a little patient.
362
00:18:10,356 --> 00:18:12,734
Well, good evening,
gentlemen. Nice to see you.
363
00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:14,235
Wish we could say
the same, Larson.
364
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:15,988
I'm afraid you'll have
to stand out here.
365
00:18:16,012 --> 00:18:17,656
There's a three-hour
wait for tables.
366
00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,241
You think you got
it made, don't you?
367
00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:21,626
That's a one-beer-a-night
crowd. Yeah.
368
00:18:21,650 --> 00:18:23,929
You haven't found out what
I'm charging for that beer.
369
00:18:23,953 --> 00:18:25,380
Figures, you'd raise the price.
370
00:18:25,404 --> 00:18:27,182
There's also a cover
charge, gentlemen.
371
00:18:27,206 --> 00:18:28,567
A cover charge!
372
00:18:28,591 --> 00:18:30,218
Come on, sarge... Wait a minute.
373
00:18:30,242 --> 00:18:31,787
How much? A dollar a couple.
374
00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:34,695
And I must say you
make a lovely couple.
375
00:18:36,249 --> 00:18:37,827
I'd have punched
him in the nose,
376
00:18:37,851 --> 00:18:40,195
but it's so unladylike.
377
00:18:40,219 --> 00:18:42,114
Ah, it wouldn't have
done any good anyway.
378
00:18:42,138 --> 00:18:44,016
At these prices, he
won't go out of business
379
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,367
until the building collapses.
380
00:18:45,391 --> 00:18:47,236
Ah, don't worry, I'm
gonna think of some way
381
00:18:47,260 --> 00:18:48,671
to get him out of here.
382
00:18:48,695 --> 00:18:50,355
Wait a minute, what did you say?
383
00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:53,241
He won't go out of business
until the building collapses.
384
00:18:53,265 --> 00:18:57,318
Agarn, I don't know why
people say you're dumb.
385
00:19:21,894 --> 00:19:24,856
Who says I'm dumb? Shh.
386
00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:27,259
Sarge, I know it's cheaper
in here, but it's no fun.
387
00:19:27,283 --> 00:19:29,127
We're only gonna be
here till closing time.
388
00:19:29,151 --> 00:19:30,996
We are? And then what?
389
00:19:31,020 --> 00:19:33,265
We're gonna do a
little carpentry work.
390
00:19:33,289 --> 00:19:35,467
Carpentry work? Yeah.
391
00:19:35,491 --> 00:19:37,502
You know, sarge, I am... Shh.
392
00:19:37,526 --> 00:19:40,405
Tomorrow, the military
governor of the territory...
393
00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:42,007
Captain Parmenter. Right.
394
00:19:42,031 --> 00:19:46,300
Is going to make a building
inspection of this saloon.
395
00:19:56,628 --> 00:19:58,206
When you change
your costume, Lilly,
396
00:19:58,230 --> 00:19:59,692
let's run through
that new number.
397
00:19:59,716 --> 00:20:01,176
I'll only be a minute, Dan.
398
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:02,611
Oh, good afternoon, captain.
399
00:20:02,635 --> 00:20:05,447
Sergeant O'Rourke. Corporal.
Good afternoon, Mr. Larson.
400
00:20:05,471 --> 00:20:07,866
We don't open until 6,
but I'm always delighted
401
00:20:07,890 --> 00:20:09,918
to have my friends
drop in anytime.
402
00:20:09,942 --> 00:20:13,038
I'm here on official
business. Oh?
403
00:20:13,062 --> 00:20:16,024
The captain's just here to make
a routine building inspection.
404
00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:18,943
Well, I'm sure you'll find
everything in good order.
405
00:20:18,967 --> 00:20:21,146
Good, good. Now, I have
several safety precautions
406
00:20:21,170 --> 00:20:22,331
I have to ask you about.
407
00:20:22,355 --> 00:20:24,532
Well, why don't you
sit right down here, sir?
408
00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:25,951
No, no, no, captain.
409
00:20:25,975 --> 00:20:27,357
Sit over here, sir.
410
00:20:33,266 --> 00:20:36,094
Are you all right, sir?
Yes, yes, I'm all right.
411
00:20:36,118 --> 00:20:39,064
Well, the chairs in this place
certainly are in bad shape.
412
00:20:39,088 --> 00:20:40,733
That's never happened before.
413
00:20:40,757 --> 00:20:42,084
A likely story.
414
00:20:42,108 --> 00:20:44,825
Sir, I demand a
complete investigation.
415
00:20:48,348 --> 00:20:50,992
That table was in perfectly
good shape last night.
416
00:20:51,016 --> 00:20:52,394
Why don't you
step over to the bar
417
00:20:52,418 --> 00:20:54,346
and have a sarsaparilla
to quiet your nerves?
418
00:20:54,370 --> 00:20:55,580
Good idea, sergeant.
419
00:20:55,604 --> 00:20:57,721
Yes, sir, I think a drink
is just what you need, sir.
420
00:20:58,707 --> 00:21:01,736
It's, uh... It's on
the house, captain.
421
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:03,905
Aha! Trying to
bribe the captain.
422
00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:05,674
I knew he'd get
around to that, sir.
423
00:21:05,698 --> 00:21:08,032
I'm not trying to bribe anybody.
424
00:21:10,670 --> 00:21:13,231
Are you all right, sir?
425
00:21:13,255 --> 00:21:15,500
This whole place
is falling apart.
426
00:21:15,524 --> 00:21:17,218
There's nothing
wrong with this place.
427
00:21:17,242 --> 00:21:18,486
It's in excellent condition.
428
00:21:18,510 --> 00:21:21,123
Dan, are you ready
to see this new step?
429
00:21:21,147 --> 00:21:22,147
Go ahead, Lilly.
430
00:21:24,032 --> 00:21:26,011
Oh, you'll love this, captain.
431
00:21:26,035 --> 00:21:27,463
All right, Harry. Hit it.
432
00:21:29,855 --> 00:21:31,216
Harry, go down to the cellar.
433
00:21:31,240 --> 00:21:33,052
Lilly has fallen
through the stage.
434
00:21:33,076 --> 00:21:35,053
It's in worse shape
than I imagined.
435
00:21:35,077 --> 00:21:36,171
I don't understand this.
436
00:21:36,195 --> 00:21:37,756
Everything was
all right yesterday.
437
00:21:37,780 --> 00:21:39,357
I'd better go upstairs
and check that
438
00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:41,359
and see what kind
of condition that's in.
439
00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:42,677
O'Rourke? Oh, yes?
440
00:21:42,701 --> 00:21:44,346
I know that you're
behind all of this
441
00:21:44,370 --> 00:21:45,931
and you're not
gonna get away with it.
442
00:21:45,955 --> 00:21:48,333
Why, I don't have any idea
what you're talking about.
443
00:21:48,357 --> 00:21:49,968
You know what I'm talking about.
444
00:21:49,992 --> 00:21:52,137
This should teach you
a lesson, Mr. Larson.
445
00:21:52,161 --> 00:21:54,306
The next time you try to
steal somebody's saloon,
446
00:21:54,330 --> 00:21:56,124
you should have
it inspected first.
447
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:59,816
I haven't lost this saloon yet. I
can handle Captain Parmenter.
448
00:22:06,725 --> 00:22:09,610
Hey, captain. I'm
so sorry about that.
449
00:22:11,514 --> 00:22:13,530
You were saying, Mr. Larson?
450
00:22:18,787 --> 00:22:26,588
Oh, my. Oh, yes. Well... Yeah!
451
00:22:37,773 --> 00:22:39,518
Hi, Jane. Hello, Wilton.
452
00:22:39,542 --> 00:22:40,835
You wanted to see me? Yes.
453
00:22:40,859 --> 00:22:42,704
I just wanted to tell you
how proud I am of you
454
00:22:42,728 --> 00:22:44,222
for running Dan
Larson out of town.
455
00:22:44,246 --> 00:22:46,124
Oh, that was nothing, Jane.
456
00:22:46,148 --> 00:22:48,711
It's my duty as military
governor of Fort Courage
457
00:22:48,735 --> 00:22:51,346
to see that no undesirable
elements come into town.
458
00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:53,548
That's why you're getting
rid of the dancing girls.
459
00:22:53,572 --> 00:22:55,417
I didn't say I was
getting rid of the girls.
460
00:22:55,441 --> 00:22:58,287
You mean to tell me that
you're gonna let those hussies
461
00:22:58,311 --> 00:23:00,589
get up on-stage and
throw their legs like this.
462
00:23:00,613 --> 00:23:03,041
Now, just a minute, Jane.
You've got this thing all wrong.
463
00:23:03,065 --> 00:23:04,826
Then you'll get rid
of the dancing girls?
464
00:23:04,850 --> 00:23:07,028
No, I mean you're doing
the dance wrong. Now, watch.
465
00:23:07,052 --> 00:23:09,514
♪ Da, da, da Yum ba-bum ♪
466
00:23:09,538 --> 00:23:10,632
♪ Bum, bum, bum ♪
467
00:23:10,656 --> 00:23:12,417
Now, that's how
you do the cancan.
468
00:23:12,441 --> 00:23:14,152
Wilton Parmenter,
you're terrible.
469
00:23:14,176 --> 00:23:16,321
You're right, Jane. I
should kick a little higher.
470
00:23:16,345 --> 00:23:17,338
That's not what I meant.
471
00:23:17,362 --> 00:23:18,991
Oh, Jane.
472
00:23:19,015 --> 00:23:20,892
In olden days, a
glimpse of stocking
473
00:23:20,916 --> 00:23:22,493
was looked on as
something shocking.
474
00:23:22,517 --> 00:23:24,596
Now, heaven
knows, anything goes.
475
00:23:24,620 --> 00:23:27,465
All right, all right. I've
made my decision.
476
00:23:27,489 --> 00:23:29,368
We'll dance over to
the saloon and tell them.
477
00:23:36,482 --> 00:23:37,459
Ah!
478
00:23:37,483 --> 00:23:38,443
Captain Parmenter.
479
00:23:38,467 --> 00:23:40,111
What are you doing
here, sir? Jane.
480
00:23:40,135 --> 00:23:42,481
As a matter of fact, I was
going to ask you the same thing.
481
00:23:42,505 --> 00:23:44,383
You see, sir, when we
heard that good old Pete
482
00:23:44,407 --> 00:23:45,967
got his saloon back
from Mr. Larson,
483
00:23:45,991 --> 00:23:48,453
we thought we'd just come in
here and help him fix the place.
484
00:23:48,477 --> 00:23:50,405
You remember Pete?
Nine kids, rickets?
485
00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:51,707
I thought you said crickets.
486
00:23:51,731 --> 00:23:54,109
The crickets are gone,
but the rickets are back.
487
00:23:54,133 --> 00:23:56,377
Wilton, you better tell
'em what you came for.
488
00:23:56,401 --> 00:23:59,598
Oh, yes. I came to tell Pete
that I've changed my mind.
489
00:23:59,622 --> 00:24:01,900
We're not going to
have any dancing girls.
490
00:24:01,924 --> 00:24:04,002
No dancing girls?
That's right, sergeant.
491
00:24:04,026 --> 00:24:06,071
It creates too many
problems with the troopers.
492
00:24:06,095 --> 00:24:07,256
Problems, sir?
493
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:08,673
Problems. Right.
494
00:24:08,697 --> 00:24:10,175
So when you see good old Pete,
495
00:24:10,199 --> 00:24:12,060
you tell him he can
still operate his saloon
496
00:24:12,084 --> 00:24:13,395
but without dancing girls.
497
00:24:13,419 --> 00:24:16,781
Come on, Wilton, we got a
lot of wild strawberries to pick.
498
00:24:16,805 --> 00:24:19,165
Jane, please. Not
in front of the men.
499
00:24:23,112 --> 00:24:25,140
So how do you like that?
500
00:24:25,164 --> 00:24:26,246
Yeah.
501
00:24:32,621 --> 00:24:34,433
I knew there was one I missed.
35715
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