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1
00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:12,054
I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time.
2
00:00:12,179 --> 00:00:13,848
Friendly faces everywhere.
3
00:00:13,973 --> 00:00:15,725
Humble folks
without temptation.
4
00:00:15,850 --> 00:00:18,602
Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind.
5
00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:20,187
Ample parking day or night.
6
00:00:20,312 --> 00:00:22,148
People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!"
7
00:00:22,273 --> 00:00:25,317
Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind.
8
00:00:25,443 --> 00:00:27,111
Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, Timmy.
9
00:00:27,236 --> 00:00:29,071
Timmy, Timmy,
liv-a-la, Timmy!
10
00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:32,575
Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine.
11
00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:38,831
Oh, hello, boys.
12
00:00:38,956 --> 00:00:40,291
Hi.
The school called and said
13
00:00:40,416 --> 00:00:41,893
we all have to start
going to class again.
14
00:00:41,917 --> 00:00:43,502
Oh, but I thought
your teacher died.
15
00:00:43,627 --> 00:00:45,046
She did, but now they're saying
16
00:00:45,171 --> 00:00:46,648
we have to start going back
to school anyways.
17
00:00:46,672 --> 00:00:48,358
- It's totally gay.
- Oh, well, I'll tell Eric.
18
00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:51,761
He's just down in the basement
playing with his dolls.
19
00:00:51,886 --> 00:00:54,305
Cartman likes
to play with dolls?
20
00:00:55,598 --> 00:00:56,724
Hello, Precious.
21
00:00:56,849 --> 00:00:58,684
Yes, that's a good Precious.
22
00:01:03,731 --> 00:01:06,400
Now it takes the lotion
from the basket.
23
00:01:06,525 --> 00:01:08,778
Please,
mister! Let me out of here!
24
00:01:08,903 --> 00:01:10,362
It puts the lotion on its skin,
25
00:01:10,488 --> 00:01:11,947
or else it gets the hose again.
26
00:01:13,449 --> 00:01:15,034
Yes, that's a good Precious.
27
00:01:15,159 --> 00:01:17,079
Okay, now, it puts the lotion
back in the basket.
28
00:01:17,203 --> 00:01:19,371
Please, mister, let me out!
29
00:01:19,497 --> 00:01:21,707
It puts
the lotion back in the basket.
30
00:01:21,832 --> 00:01:24,210
I miss my
mom, mister! I want to see my...
31
00:01:24,335 --> 00:01:26,003
Put the lotion
in the fucking basket!
32
00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:27,838
- Sweetie?
- Yes, Mom?
33
00:01:27,963 --> 00:01:30,633
You have to get ready
for school.
34
00:01:30,758 --> 00:01:32,384
No, our teacher's dead,
remember?
35
00:01:32,510 --> 00:01:34,230
Yes, but they said
two weeks off was enough,
36
00:01:34,303 --> 00:01:36,055
and they want everyone back.
37
00:01:36,180 --> 00:01:37,473
Two weeks isn't enough.
38
00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:39,158
I'm not over our teacher's
tragic death.
39
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:40,351
I'm still sh-shooken up.
40
00:01:40,476 --> 00:01:41,602
You'll get over it, honey.
41
00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:44,605
But I want to playyyyy!
42
00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:50,545
I can't believe it's been two
weeks since I've seen you guys.
43
00:01:50,569 --> 00:01:51,779
What have you been doing?
44
00:01:51,904 --> 00:01:53,322
- Hey, guys!
- Hey, Bebe!
45
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:56,242
You guys, uh, notice
anything different?
46
00:01:56,367 --> 00:01:57,827
Oh, my God, Bebe, you got boobs!
47
00:01:57,952 --> 00:01:59,703
Yeah, they started
coming in last week.
48
00:01:59,829 --> 00:02:01,431
At first I thought they
were just mosquito bites,
49
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:02,748
but then they didn't go away.
50
00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:05,126
M'kay, kids.
Let's take our seats, m'kay?
51
00:02:05,251 --> 00:02:08,254
I know this has been a difficult
couple weeks for you all
52
00:02:08,379 --> 00:02:10,297
with the untimely death
of your teacher.
53
00:02:10,422 --> 00:02:13,551
But it's time for us to try
to move on and learn, m'kay?
54
00:02:13,676 --> 00:02:14,820
Mr. Mackey,
I don't think I'm over
55
00:02:14,844 --> 00:02:16,387
the teacher's tragic death yet.
56
00:02:16,512 --> 00:02:18,532
I need more time. It's just...
It still hurts, you know?
57
00:02:18,556 --> 00:02:21,267
- Can I go home?
- No, Eric, what we're gonna do
58
00:02:21,392 --> 00:02:24,061
is learn to hide our emotions
with math problems.
59
00:02:24,186 --> 00:02:28,149
M'kay, so, let's start with some
multiplication tables, m'kay?
60
00:02:28,274 --> 00:02:29,900
First we'll do 4 times 4...
61
00:02:30,025 --> 00:02:31,861
Dude, look at Bebe.
62
00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:34,947
Something seems different
about her.
63
00:02:35,072 --> 00:02:36,407
Yeah, I noticed that, too.
64
00:02:36,532 --> 00:02:37,892
Did she get a haircut
or something?
65
00:02:37,950 --> 00:02:38,950
I don't know.
66
00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:43,414
Hey, Token, you know,
I never really noticed before,
67
00:02:43,539 --> 00:02:45,249
but that girl Bebe
is kind of cool.
68
00:02:45,374 --> 00:02:46,643
I was just thinking
the same thing.
69
00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:48,127
It's like she's a girl,
70
00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:49,892
but she's someone
you could hang out with.
71
00:02:49,962 --> 00:02:52,047
Yeah, Bebe is kind of cool, huh?
72
00:02:54,383 --> 00:02:56,051
Hey, Craig,
is that the same shirt
73
00:02:56,177 --> 00:02:57,553
that that Bebe chick
always wears?
74
00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,263
I don't know. Why?
75
00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:02,725
It just... It just seems like
a really awesome shirt.
76
00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:04,977
Yeah, it kind of does.
77
00:03:10,191 --> 00:03:12,067
M'kay, and so, uh...
78
00:03:12,193 --> 00:03:15,446
So, who can tell me the answer
to the first problem, 6 times 8?
79
00:03:15,571 --> 00:03:16,571
Uh, Bebe?
80
00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,742
Oh, uh... 48?
81
00:03:21,285 --> 00:03:23,787
- That is an awesome answer!
- Yeah!
82
00:03:23,913 --> 00:03:25,331
Dude, Bebe is really smart.
83
00:03:25,456 --> 00:03:26,957
Yeah, I never
noticed that before.
84
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:29,102
Maybe she's actually cool
enough to hang out with us.
85
00:03:29,126 --> 00:03:30,294
Yeah, maybe.
86
00:03:32,171 --> 00:03:34,757
But I was like, "I'm not buying
those shoes for $20."
87
00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:38,052
- Uh, hey, Bebe.
- Yeah?
88
00:03:38,177 --> 00:03:40,137
Uh, we're gonna go throw
rocks at cars later on,
89
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:42,056
and we thought maybe
you'd like to join us.
90
00:03:42,181 --> 00:03:43,849
Really? I've never
done that before.
91
00:03:43,974 --> 00:03:45,184
It's really fun!
92
00:03:45,309 --> 00:03:46,709
You toss these
little rocks at cars,
93
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:48,490
and if the driver gets angry,
you blame me!
94
00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:49,730
Yeah, it's cool!
95
00:03:49,855 --> 00:03:51,482
Well, sure,
that sounds hella fun.
96
00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:54,318
- Yeah, hella fun!
- She's right!
97
00:03:54,443 --> 00:03:55,819
Wow. "Hella" fun.
That's awesome.
98
00:03:55,945 --> 00:03:57,238
I'm gonna start saying that now.
99
00:03:57,363 --> 00:03:58,603
Cool.
We'll see you later, Bebe.
100
00:03:59,865 --> 00:04:01,158
Stan, you've never asked m e
101
00:04:01,283 --> 00:04:03,327
to throw rocks at cars
with you guys.
102
00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:05,492
That's different, dude.
You're, like, my girlfriend.
103
00:04:05,579 --> 00:04:07,373
Bebe's just... I don't know.
She's just cool.
104
00:04:07,498 --> 00:04:09,166
Yeah, she's really cool.
105
00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:11,168
It's weird how we
never noticed before.
106
00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:15,941
So, what you do, see,
is you wait for a car
107
00:04:15,965 --> 00:04:17,025
to drive by that big pine tree.
108
00:04:17,049 --> 00:04:18,384
Then you chuck a rock at it.
109
00:04:18,509 --> 00:04:19,549
It's all about the timing.
110
00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:22,304
You damn kids!
111
00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:23,429
Cool!
112
00:04:23,514 --> 00:04:24,932
- You try it, Bebe!
- Okay.
113
00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:26,057
Here comes a sedan!
114
00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:30,354
You damn kids!
115
00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:31,939
Cool!
116
00:04:32,064 --> 00:04:33,315
That was the most perfect throw
117
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,234
- I've ever seen!
- That was sweet, Bebe!
118
00:04:35,359 --> 00:04:37,039
Now, if you just hold
the rock like this...
119
00:04:37,069 --> 00:04:38,713
Yeah, here, like, if you put
your thumb on this side...
120
00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:40,489
I'm showing her.
121
00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:43,014
Yeah, just let me show her real
quick how to put the thumb...
122
00:04:45,494 --> 00:04:47,830
Anyways, you put a spin on it
by holding it here...
123
00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:49,995
Yeah, and then you can actually
hold it like this...
124
00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:57,548
Uh, listen, guys, um, it's 5:30.
125
00:04:57,673 --> 00:04:59,925
I'm supposed to get home,
so I'll see you later.
126
00:05:05,389 --> 00:05:06,640
Wait.
What were we doing again?
127
00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:08,005
We were throwing rocks at cars.
128
00:05:08,058 --> 00:05:09,184
Oh, yeah.
129
00:05:09,310 --> 00:05:10,853
Here comes an S.U.V.!
130
00:05:12,354 --> 00:05:14,064
You damn kids!
131
00:05:17,693 --> 00:05:20,195
- Hi, Bebe!
- Hey, everybody.
132
00:05:20,321 --> 00:05:22,948
- Oh, for Christ's sake.
- M'kay.
133
00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:25,743
Kids, yesterday,
I asked you to write a paper
134
00:05:25,868 --> 00:05:27,369
to read aloud for the class.
135
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:28,912
Now, who wants to start?
136
00:05:30,289 --> 00:05:31,707
M'kay, Clyde.
137
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,292
My paper is called.
138
00:05:33,417 --> 00:05:35,627
"Why Bebe
Is the Coolest Person Ever."
139
00:05:35,753 --> 00:05:37,212
Hey, that's what I wrote about!
140
00:05:37,338 --> 00:05:38,380
Me too!
141
00:05:42,301 --> 00:05:45,054
M'kay.
Go ahead, Clyde.
142
00:05:46,430 --> 00:05:48,307
"My friend Bebe is really smart.
143
00:05:48,432 --> 00:05:51,268
She tells funny jokes
and knows a lot about stuff.
144
00:05:51,393 --> 00:05:53,812
She's good at almost
everything she tries.
145
00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:55,856
She's awesome.
The end."
146
00:05:59,151 --> 00:06:00,861
M'kay. Very nice, Clyde.
147
00:06:00,986 --> 00:06:03,364
Uh, Token, why don't you
read your paper?
148
00:06:04,198 --> 00:06:06,075
"If I Could Be Bebe."
149
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:08,952
"If I was Bebe, I would have
lots of friends
150
00:06:09,078 --> 00:06:10,662
because I would be so great.
151
00:06:10,788 --> 00:06:14,291
I would make people smile
and think wherever I went."
152
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:17,461
M'kay.
Interesting, Token.
153
00:06:17,586 --> 00:06:20,506
Uh... who would like to go next?
154
00:06:21,924 --> 00:06:25,677
Uh, how about someone who didn't
write about how cool Bebe is?
155
00:06:28,639 --> 00:06:29,890
M'kay, Bebe.
156
00:06:30,015 --> 00:06:31,975
"My Cat, Thumper."
157
00:06:33,310 --> 00:06:35,604
"Thumper is gray
with a white spot.
158
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:37,606
Sometimes he likes
to chase his tail."
159
00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:41,485
Chase his tail!
That must be so funny!
160
00:06:41,610 --> 00:06:43,028
"Thumper is 12 years old.
161
00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:45,030
That's pretty old for a cat.
162
00:06:45,155 --> 00:06:46,532
The end."
163
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:49,243
God, you know, that's so true,
164
00:06:49,368 --> 00:06:51,137
because you sometimes
never really think about
165
00:06:51,161 --> 00:06:52,496
how old a pet is
until it's gone.
166
00:06:52,621 --> 00:06:54,081
That's true, huh?
167
00:06:54,206 --> 00:06:55,999
Man, that really makes me
reflect on my pets.
168
00:06:56,125 --> 00:06:58,919
That's such a great paper.
169
00:07:00,963 --> 00:07:03,507
M'kay, Wendy, why don't
we hear your paper?
170
00:07:03,632 --> 00:07:05,134
"The New Cold War."
171
00:07:05,259 --> 00:07:07,428
Oh, God, here we go again.
Dork alert!
172
00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:12,349
But then the mall closes
at 4:00 or 5:00, so...
173
00:07:12,474 --> 00:07:14,160
Have any of you dumb girls
seen Bebe anywhere?
174
00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:16,103
- No!
- Maybe she's in the lunch line.
175
00:07:16,228 --> 00:07:17,855
Yeah!
176
00:07:17,980 --> 00:07:19,106
Can you believe Bebe?
177
00:07:19,231 --> 00:07:20,625
She thinks she's so cool
all of a sudden!
178
00:07:20,649 --> 00:07:21,942
I can't stand her anymore.
179
00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:23,628
- She's such a slut.
- She's a total slut.
180
00:07:23,652 --> 00:07:25,255
You know what I heard?
I heard that she made out
181
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:27,072
with eight different boys
in one minute.
182
00:07:27,197 --> 00:07:28,258
I heard
that she lifted her shirt
183
00:07:28,282 --> 00:07:29,700
to the boys at the bus stop.
184
00:07:29,825 --> 00:07:32,119
I heard that her asshole
is, like, this big around.
185
00:07:33,495 --> 00:07:35,247
- Hey, guys.
- Oh, hey, Bebe.
186
00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:36,748
Slut. Slut.
187
00:07:36,874 --> 00:07:39,293
- Slut. Slut.
- Slut.
188
00:07:39,418 --> 00:07:41,420
You guys still want to go
ice-skating after school?
189
00:07:41,545 --> 00:07:42,838
Oh, no, that's okay, Bebe.
190
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,232
You might trip,
and then we'd be sucked
191
00:07:44,256 --> 00:07:45,400
into your huge, gaping vagina
192
00:07:45,424 --> 00:07:47,050
like ants into a vacuum cleaner.
193
00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:48,594
Slut. Slut.
194
00:07:48,719 --> 00:07:50,888
- Slut.
- Slut.
195
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:04,193
Bebe, is something the matter?
196
00:08:04,318 --> 00:08:07,112
Oh, Mom. It's just...
my girlfriends at school
197
00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:08,906
said some really mean things
to me today.
198
00:08:09,907 --> 00:08:12,868
They called me a slut
with a huge, gaping vagina.
199
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:15,787
Oh, sweetie,
you're all just growing up.
200
00:08:15,913 --> 00:08:18,123
Part of being a woman
is having a friend one day
201
00:08:18,248 --> 00:08:19,750
and calling her a slut the next.
202
00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:21,084
But am I slutty just because
203
00:08:21,210 --> 00:08:22,395
I'm starting to be friends
with guys?
204
00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:23,670
I mean, they just like me
205
00:08:23,795 --> 00:08:25,231
because they think
I'm smart and cool.
206
00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:26,840
I remember,
when I was a little girl,
207
00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:29,092
the boys didn't think
I was very smart at all.
208
00:08:29,218 --> 00:08:30,677
But then one day,
209
00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:32,679
they all started thinking
I was really smart.
210
00:08:32,804 --> 00:08:35,891
I guess big smarts
just run in our family.
211
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:38,644
Well, if the girls don't want
to be my friends, that's fine.
212
00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:40,771
Guys are way cooler anyways.
213
00:08:42,564 --> 00:08:44,525
You guys wanted me
to meet you here?
214
00:08:44,650 --> 00:08:47,110
Yeah, have a seat, Tweek.
We all need to have a talk.
215
00:08:47,236 --> 00:08:48,362
Oh, God!
216
00:08:48,487 --> 00:08:50,087
All right, guys,
now that we're all here,
217
00:08:50,155 --> 00:08:52,324
I think we need to have
a difficult conversation.
218
00:08:52,449 --> 00:08:54,743
It's obvious that Bebe is,
like, the coolest, smartest,
219
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:56,286
most awesome person
we've ever met.
220
00:08:56,411 --> 00:08:57,788
- True. Yeah.
- True. Yeah.
221
00:08:57,913 --> 00:08:59,793
And, you know, we've been
trying to fill the gap
222
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,667
with a fourth friend
ever since Kenny died...
223
00:09:01,792 --> 00:09:04,127
God rest his soul... and it
hasn't been an easy process.
224
00:09:04,253 --> 00:09:05,921
Right.
225
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:09,049
So, even though I think it's
a tough thing to do right now,
226
00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:11,214
I think maybe it's best
for everyone if we make room
227
00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:13,845
to allow Bebe to be
our new fourth friend.
228
00:09:13,971 --> 00:09:15,472
- Yeah.
- That would be best.
229
00:09:15,597 --> 00:09:16,824
Well, I'm glad
you guys all agree.
230
00:09:16,848 --> 00:09:18,350
And so, Kyle, I just want to say
231
00:09:18,475 --> 00:09:20,328
that it's been really great
and we're gonna miss you.
232
00:09:20,352 --> 00:09:21,603
- Huh?!
- Kyle?
233
00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:23,328
And even though
it didn't quite work out,
234
00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:24,958
I'm sure you'll find other
friends down the road, Kyle.
235
00:09:24,982 --> 00:09:27,025
Here's a nice watch for you
and some peanuts.
236
00:09:27,150 --> 00:09:29,486
Me?! Dude, I've been here
since the beginning!
237
00:09:29,611 --> 00:09:31,154
And we're really sad
to see you go.
238
00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:32,632
Let's give a big round of
applause for Kyle, everybody.
239
00:09:32,656 --> 00:09:33,740
Hip-hip!
240
00:09:33,865 --> 00:09:35,492
Dude, we're not
kicking Kyle out!
241
00:09:35,617 --> 00:09:37,035
Pleeease?
242
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:38,160
No!
243
00:09:38,203 --> 00:09:39,955
All right, fine!
244
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:42,400
So then I guess we have no
choice but to let you go, Tweek.
245
00:09:42,457 --> 00:09:44,310
But we want you to know
that it's been really fun.
246
00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:45,614
Here's a watch and some peanuts.
247
00:09:45,711 --> 00:09:47,296
- No way! Tweek's cool!
- Yeah!
248
00:09:47,421 --> 00:09:49,923
Well, dumb-asses, how are
we gonna make room for Bebe?
249
00:09:53,302 --> 00:09:55,971
Thanks for inviting me to ride
the bus to school with you guys.
250
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,096
Sure thing, Bebe.
251
00:09:57,180 --> 00:09:58,807
That's fine!
That's fine!
252
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:02,519
Fuck you, Kyle,
and fuck you, Stan!
253
00:10:03,312 --> 00:10:05,981
Fuck you, Tweek!
254
00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:08,358
Bebe, you're still cool.
255
00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:17,159
- What are you doing?
- We're trying to get Bebe
256
00:10:17,284 --> 00:10:18,702
to run for class president!
257
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:20,537
I 'm class president!
258
00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:22,205
The vote was last fall!
259
00:10:22,331 --> 00:10:23,891
Well, yeah. But, Wendy,
you have to admit.
260
00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:25,768
Bebe's a lot smarter
and more organized than you.
261
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,919
Yeah, we need
a leader like Bebe.
262
00:10:28,045 --> 00:10:30,964
She can teach us all so much.
263
00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:33,050
She's not smarter
and cooler than everyone!
264
00:10:33,175 --> 00:10:35,135
You guys are just drawn
to something else!
265
00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:38,013
What?
266
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:42,059
God, you guys are so stupid!
267
00:10:42,851 --> 00:10:44,311
Stupider than Bebe!
268
00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:45,437
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
269
00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:47,397
Bebe's cool, huh, fellas?
270
00:10:47,522 --> 00:10:48,315
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
271
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:50,192
- Sure is.
- Yep.
272
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,838
I can't wait to watch
"Terrance & Phillip" with Bebe!
273
00:10:53,862 --> 00:10:56,823
Yeah!
Where are you guys going?
274
00:10:56,948 --> 00:10:58,575
We're going to see
our friend Bebe.
275
00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:00,952
Bebe is our friend.
Didn't you all get the memo?
276
00:11:01,078 --> 00:11:02,454
Bebe is everybody's friend.
277
00:11:02,579 --> 00:11:04,164
Yeah, God put Bebe on Earth
278
00:11:04,289 --> 00:11:05,916
to enrich everyone's lives.
279
00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,504
Timmy! Timmy!
280
00:11:10,629 --> 00:11:12,297
All right, I guess we can all
281
00:11:12,422 --> 00:11:13,822
watch "Terrance & Phillip"
together.
282
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,095
- Oh, hello, boys.
- Is Bebe home?
283
00:11:18,220 --> 00:11:19,930
No, she's with one
of her little friends.
284
00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:22,307
But she should be back shortly
if you boys want to wait.
285
00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:24,601
- Who is she with?
- I believe she's playing "Lambs"
286
00:11:24,726 --> 00:11:26,311
over at Eric Cartman's house.
287
00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:27,979
Cartman's?
288
00:11:28,105 --> 00:11:29,940
See, and this is Precious!
289
00:11:30,065 --> 00:11:31,817
- Precious?
- Bark, bark, bark!
290
00:11:31,942 --> 00:11:33,819
Okay, so, then we put
my mom's hand lotion
291
00:11:33,944 --> 00:11:36,405
in this little basket and lower
it down to Polly Prissy Pants.
292
00:11:39,366 --> 00:11:41,493
Now you say, "It puts
the lotion on its skin,
293
00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:43,161
or else it gets the hose again."
294
00:11:43,286 --> 00:11:45,080
It... puts the lotion
on its skin,
295
00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:48,166
- or else it gets the hose again.
- Yeah!
296
00:11:48,291 --> 00:11:50,043
Mister,
please let me out of here!
297
00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:51,253
Now say it again... louder!
298
00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:52,629
It puts the lotion on its skin,
299
00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:54,297
or else it gets the hose again.
300
00:11:54,423 --> 00:11:56,800
Good! Now... Now put the lotion
back in the basket.
301
00:11:56,925 --> 00:11:58,510
My parents have money, mister!
302
00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:00,113
They'll give you
whatever you want! Please!
303
00:12:00,137 --> 00:12:01,337
Now just yell, "put the lotion
304
00:12:01,430 --> 00:12:02,556
in the fucking basket!"
305
00:12:02,681 --> 00:12:03,890
Put the lotion in the basket!
306
00:12:04,015 --> 00:12:05,455
Put the lotion
in the fucking basket!
307
00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:06,977
Oh, no, Precious!
308
00:12:07,102 --> 00:12:08,270
I got your dog, mister!
309
00:12:08,395 --> 00:12:09,896
Let me out or I'm gonna kill it!
310
00:12:10,021 --> 00:12:11,815
You say,
"Don't you hurt my fucking dog!"
311
00:12:11,940 --> 00:12:13,442
Don't you hurt my fucking dog!
312
00:12:13,567 --> 00:12:15,527
You bitch!
I'll cut your throat!
313
00:12:15,652 --> 00:12:17,028
What the hell are you doing?
314
00:12:17,154 --> 00:12:19,072
We're playing "Lambs."
315
00:12:19,197 --> 00:12:20,357
Bebe, I thought we were gonna
316
00:12:20,449 --> 00:12:21,783
watch "Terrance & Phillip"
today.
317
00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:23,177
Yeah, and then we got to
work on your campaign!
318
00:12:23,201 --> 00:12:24,601
Right, but first
we have to go to...
319
00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,081
You guys, calm down!
320
00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:35,213
Timmy! Timmy!
321
00:12:36,798 --> 00:12:40,469
This is insane!
Stop it, you guys! Please!
322
00:12:54,191 --> 00:12:56,401
Oh, boy, I never meant
to cause all this trouble.
323
00:13:04,993 --> 00:13:07,078
Bebe, those boys
from your school
324
00:13:07,204 --> 00:13:09,664
are still waiting outside
to see if you'll come out.
325
00:13:09,790 --> 00:13:10,665
I know.
326
00:13:10,791 --> 00:13:12,292
They've been there all day.
327
00:13:35,941 --> 00:13:39,861
Looks like my little girl
has a lot of gentlemen callers.
328
00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:42,656
Mom, why is everyone acting
so different around me?
329
00:13:42,781 --> 00:13:45,200
Sweetie, you're just blossoming
into a woman.
330
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:47,202
But I don't know if I want to.
331
00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,579
Sometimes I think I'm not
as smart and cool as they say.
332
00:13:49,704 --> 00:13:51,849
That everyone just tells me I am
because of my hooters.
333
00:13:51,873 --> 00:13:53,333
Sweetie, you're a Stevens.
334
00:13:53,458 --> 00:13:55,126
And Stevens women
are always told
335
00:13:55,252 --> 00:13:57,671
they're really, really smart.
336
00:13:57,796 --> 00:14:00,549
Mom, what's 6 times 8?
337
00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:01,925
Oh, sweetie.
338
00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:04,845
Those are two completely
different numbers.
339
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:13,061
All right, boys,
time to be getting home.
340
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:15,772
Bebe's not feeling well,
and she can't come out today.
341
00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:17,315
Go on! Shoo!
342
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:28,702
We made it!
343
00:14:28,827 --> 00:14:30,662
Boys, can you call 911 for us?
344
00:14:34,165 --> 00:14:35,876
Oh, my God!
We've landed on Earth
345
00:14:36,001 --> 00:14:37,061
thousands of years
in the future,
346
00:14:37,085 --> 00:14:38,336
and apes have taken over!
347
00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:40,046
I knew it!
You blew it up, didn't you?!
348
00:14:40,171 --> 00:14:43,091
I don't want to live
in this futuristic madness!
349
00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:45,719
Take your ape world
and go to hell!
350
00:14:47,345 --> 00:14:49,890
Having boobs sucks.
351
00:14:51,766 --> 00:14:53,393
Well, hello, there, little girl.
352
00:14:53,518 --> 00:14:54,728
My name is Dr. Hallis.
353
00:14:54,853 --> 00:14:56,229
What can I do for you today?
354
00:14:56,354 --> 00:14:59,524
I want to have
breast-reduction surgery.
355
00:15:02,777 --> 00:15:04,613
- You?
- Yes.
356
00:15:04,738 --> 00:15:08,033
I have $212 in nickels
and a gold bracelet.
357
00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,493
Well, young lady, I'm afraid
that we don't offer
358
00:15:10,619 --> 00:15:13,163
breast-reduction surgery
to girls of your age.
359
00:15:13,288 --> 00:15:15,874
Why not? Britney Spears got fake
ones when she was a teenager.
360
00:15:15,999 --> 00:15:17,626
Why can't I have mine taken off?
361
00:15:17,751 --> 00:15:19,002
Because making breasts larger
362
00:15:19,127 --> 00:15:20,629
is a beautiful
and wonderful thing.
363
00:15:20,754 --> 00:15:23,214
Making them smaller is... insane.
364
00:15:23,340 --> 00:15:25,133
I think it's insane
to want them bigger!
365
00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:27,719
Why do you hate your breasts so?
366
00:15:27,844 --> 00:15:29,071
Ever since I got
these stupid things,
367
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,430
everyone treats me differently.
368
00:15:30,555 --> 00:15:31,824
I feel like
I might be treated differently
369
00:15:31,848 --> 00:15:32,974
the rest of my life.
370
00:15:33,099 --> 00:15:34,976
Oh, come on, now.
That's just silly.
371
00:15:35,101 --> 00:15:36,603
Here's the Anderson file,
Doctor.
372
00:15:36,728 --> 00:15:38,063
Oh, awesome!
373
00:15:38,188 --> 00:15:40,065
Thank you so much, Jillian.
That's great.
374
00:15:40,190 --> 00:15:42,567
Oh, God damn.
Thank you so much.
375
00:15:44,069 --> 00:15:46,071
And here's the coffee
you wanted, Doctor.
376
00:15:46,196 --> 00:15:47,697
Yeah, whatever.
Get out of here.
377
00:15:48,990 --> 00:15:50,325
Now, I was saying?
378
00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:51,910
Please, you have to help me!
379
00:15:52,035 --> 00:15:53,930
I think that if my breasts
keep growing this way,
380
00:15:53,954 --> 00:15:55,580
boys will give me
whatever I want.
381
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:57,207
Yeah, so,
that's great, isn't it?
382
00:15:57,332 --> 00:15:59,042
No, it's not!
Because if I grow up
383
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:00,937
getting everything I want and
having things made easy for me
384
00:16:00,961 --> 00:16:02,295
because I have hot knockers,
385
00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:04,130
then I'm gonna grow up
to be a lame person.
386
00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:05,535
If I'm handed
everything in life,
387
00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:06,776
then my chances
of becoming a lawyer
388
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:08,593
or a marine biologist are zero!
389
00:16:08,718 --> 00:16:10,518
That may be true,
but I'm afraid I just cannot
390
00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:12,722
ethically perform
a breast-reduction surgery
391
00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:14,766
- on an 8-year-old girl.
- Damn it!
392
00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:16,393
If, on the other hand,
you'd like
393
00:16:16,518 --> 00:16:17,995
to make them a little bigger,
I think now might be
394
00:16:18,019 --> 00:16:19,259
the right time to size up, mmm?
395
00:16:19,354 --> 00:16:20,981
Oh, fuck off!
396
00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:24,693
Randy, could you have
a talk with Stanley?
397
00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:26,111
Why?
What's the matter with him?
398
00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:27,445
It's just that... Well...
399
00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:29,781
he's been acting a little
different lately.
400
00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:31,491
Ah-tah!
401
00:16:31,616 --> 00:16:34,035
Ah-tah!
402
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:36,955
He's been ignoring his homework
and all of his friends.
403
00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:38,289
I can't figure out why.
404
00:16:38,415 --> 00:16:40,208
Ah-tah.
405
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,544
Ah-tah!
406
00:16:42,669 --> 00:16:45,463
Oh, boy. It looks like he's
starting to notice breasts.
407
00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:47,048
Oh, yes.
408
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:49,217
Our little Stanley
is starting to become a man.
409
00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:50,844
Ah-tah!
410
00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:52,303
Ahh... ah-tah!
411
00:16:52,429 --> 00:16:53,555
Hey, there, Son.
412
00:16:55,056 --> 00:16:56,474
Ah-tah. Ah-tah.
413
00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:59,602
Yes, ah-tah.
Let's have a talk, Stan.
414
00:16:59,728 --> 00:17:01,521
Tah...
415
00:17:01,646 --> 00:17:05,400
Stan, as you get older,
boobs... these ah-tah...
416
00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:08,028
Will start becoming
a major part of your life.
417
00:17:08,153 --> 00:17:10,155
- Ah-tah?
- But, Stanley,
418
00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:12,323
you can't let them get
in the way of your friends.
419
00:17:12,449 --> 00:17:14,200
There are lots of boobs
out there, son.
420
00:17:14,325 --> 00:17:17,245
But they're just boobs.
Your friends are forever.
421
00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:19,914
Friends... ah-tah.
422
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,375
I know you think this set
of boobs is important now,
423
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:24,919
but those boobs will be replaced
by another set of boobs.
424
00:17:25,045 --> 00:17:26,504
Boobs will come and go.
425
00:17:26,629 --> 00:17:28,590
And then, someday,
you'll meet a pair of boobs
426
00:17:28,715 --> 00:17:30,175
that you want to marry,
427
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:32,302
and those become the boobs
that matter the most.
428
00:17:32,427 --> 00:17:33,678
I love you.
429
00:17:33,803 --> 00:17:36,097
If you can just
understand that, Stanley,
430
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:39,267
you'll see that boobs
hold no re a I power at all.
431
00:17:49,027 --> 00:17:50,320
The boys are at war.
432
00:17:50,445 --> 00:17:52,447
- All is going as planned.
- Yes.
433
00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:54,866
Soon all the boys
will be brought to their knees.
434
00:17:54,991 --> 00:17:56,534
We grow larger every day...
435
00:17:56,659 --> 00:17:57,744
And stronger.
436
00:17:57,869 --> 00:17:58,995
Soon, the entire town...
437
00:17:59,120 --> 00:17:59,996
She's awake!
438
00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:00,997
Oh, quiet!
439
00:18:01,122 --> 00:18:03,583
Mom! Mom!
440
00:18:03,708 --> 00:18:05,919
- What is it, Bebe?
- My breasts!
441
00:18:06,044 --> 00:18:08,379
Oh, sweetheart, you're
just becoming a young lady.
442
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:10,090
No, they're conspiring!
443
00:18:10,215 --> 00:18:12,926
Mom, they were talking.
They want to destroy the town!
444
00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:14,886
Yes, darling,
your breasts have a power
445
00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:17,013
that will unleash itself
as you get older.
446
00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:18,681
They feed off the misery of boys
447
00:18:18,807 --> 00:18:20,725
and grow to bring woe
wherever they can.
448
00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:23,019
You're blossoming into a woman.
449
00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:24,521
That does it!
450
00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:27,273
I'm not letting these things
run my life!
451
00:18:31,861 --> 00:18:33,696
Young lady,
are you absolutely sure
452
00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:37,200
you want to consider this kind
of procedure for your breasts?
453
00:18:38,034 --> 00:18:40,328
Yes, I want to get
breast implants.
454
00:18:40,453 --> 00:18:42,080
I tried to tell her
she was too young.
455
00:18:42,205 --> 00:18:44,582
Well, it is a different time,
Mrs. Testaberger.
456
00:18:44,707 --> 00:18:45,959
Society puts a lot of pressure
457
00:18:46,084 --> 00:18:47,585
on your daughter
to look her best.
458
00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:50,255
Having small breasts
can make her feel unimportant.
459
00:18:51,381 --> 00:18:53,258
But she's 8!
460
00:18:53,383 --> 00:18:56,052
Yes, well, not too young to feel
flat and, therefore, not pretty.
461
00:18:56,177 --> 00:18:58,388
- That's what I said.
- However, young lady,
462
00:18:58,513 --> 00:19:00,807
I'm afraid breast implants
are not for everyone.
463
00:19:00,932 --> 00:19:02,392
I'll need to carefully assess
464
00:19:02,517 --> 00:19:04,662
your physical and mental
condition to see if augmentation
465
00:19:04,686 --> 00:19:06,604
is truly the best way
for you to go.
466
00:19:06,729 --> 00:19:08,356
I have $3,000 cash.
467
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:09,649
You pass.
Let's do this thing.
468
00:19:09,774 --> 00:19:11,359
Oh, wait! You're gonna
do it right now?
469
00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:14,404
Sure, breast augmentation
is now a very simple procedure.
470
00:19:14,529 --> 00:19:16,698
What we do is make a small
incision in the armpit,
471
00:19:16,823 --> 00:19:18,032
where it won't be seen.
472
00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:19,742
Then we take
this little plastic bag
473
00:19:19,868 --> 00:19:21,411
and gently place it
in the chest,
474
00:19:21,536 --> 00:19:23,079
where we fill it
with salt water.
475
00:19:23,204 --> 00:19:25,081
I still don't know about this.
476
00:19:25,206 --> 00:19:27,834
Look, us plastic surgeons
have one philosophy...
477
00:19:27,959 --> 00:19:30,128
If we can help someone's
self-esteem a little,
478
00:19:30,253 --> 00:19:33,381
then why not do it
if they have $3,000?
479
00:19:41,973 --> 00:19:44,309
Got to... jam it!
480
00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:45,434
Oh, there.
481
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:48,438
Get... in... there... you bitch!
482
00:19:48,563 --> 00:19:52,025
Get... in... there... you bitch!
483
00:19:52,150 --> 00:19:56,196
Ah. Okay, there's one, Wendy.
Doing great.
484
00:19:58,072 --> 00:20:01,910
M'kay, kids, we need to
talk about your failing grades.
485
00:20:02,827 --> 00:20:04,954
Bebe!
Where Bebe?!
486
00:20:05,079 --> 00:20:06,331
Bebe!
487
00:20:06,456 --> 00:20:08,041
- Fire bad!
- Fire!
488
00:20:08,166 --> 00:20:11,419
M'kay, we all have to start
studying more
489
00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:13,630
and fighting less, m'kay?
490
00:20:13,755 --> 00:20:14,797
- Bebe!
- Bebe!
491
00:20:14,923 --> 00:20:17,508
Ah-tah! Ah-tah!
492
00:20:17,634 --> 00:20:20,345
- Hey, guys.
- Hey!
493
00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:29,896
Have you guys noticed that Bebe
isn't as cool as she used to be?
494
00:20:30,021 --> 00:20:32,857
Yeah, what the hell
happened to us?
495
00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:35,068
Oh, my God.
I get it now.
496
00:20:35,193 --> 00:20:36,736
It was Bebe's boobs!
497
00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:38,154
Bebe's boobs?
498
00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:39,906
Oh, cool!
It worked!
499
00:20:40,031 --> 00:20:42,617
Don't you guys see? Boobs
do something to our brains.
500
00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:44,619
They fill our brains
with illusions.
501
00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:47,247
So... Bebe didn't become
smart and cool?
502
00:20:47,372 --> 00:20:49,916
- It was just her boobs?
- Yes!
503
00:20:50,041 --> 00:20:53,253
So Bebe is actually just
as lame as she ever was?
504
00:20:53,378 --> 00:20:55,797
Right! My boobs just
clouded your judgment.
505
00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:57,399
But that sucks.
I don't want something
506
00:20:57,423 --> 00:20:58,925
to have that much power over me.
507
00:20:59,050 --> 00:21:01,469
I don't think it will, you guys,
as long as we realize it.
508
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:03,471
We must learn to control
their power over us.
509
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,265
Yeah, screw boobs!
They're stupid!
510
00:21:05,390 --> 00:21:06,933
I'm sorry for fighting,
you guys.
511
00:21:07,058 --> 00:21:08,351
I'm sorry.
512
00:21:08,476 --> 00:21:10,770
- I'm sorry, guys.
- Dude, I'm sorry, too.
513
00:21:10,895 --> 00:21:12,730
Aww, that's so sweet.
514
00:21:12,855 --> 00:21:14,941
Let's never let boobs
come between us again!
515
00:21:15,066 --> 00:21:16,901
- Hear, hear!
- Boobs are stupid!
516
00:21:17,026 --> 00:21:19,654
Hi, everybody!
517
00:21:25,410 --> 00:21:26,953
Look at those ridiculous things!
518
00:21:27,078 --> 00:21:29,998
Ew! They're all hard and oogey!
519
00:21:30,123 --> 00:21:31,666
What a stupid bitch!
38409
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