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1
00:00:03,057 --> 00:00:04,910
All right, sorry about
the close quarters, Coop.
2
00:00:04,911 --> 00:00:06,455
We're gonna be working from
the home office for a while.
3
00:00:06,456 --> 00:00:07,630
Yeah, it sucks.
4
00:00:07,631 --> 00:00:11,038
Panoramic view, fiber-optic
wi-fi, working toilets.
5
00:00:11,538 --> 00:00:12,932
Cheeseburgers on pretzel bread.
6
00:00:12,966 --> 00:00:15,034
That's it, I quit.
7
00:00:15,068 --> 00:00:17,837
Cooper, wait until you
try Gabi's waffle fries.
8
00:00:17,871 --> 00:00:20,706
With my special, secret-recipe ketchup.
9
00:00:20,741 --> 00:00:21,908
Ooh, what's the secret?
10
00:00:21,942 --> 00:00:23,009
(Whispers) Bought it at the store.
11
00:00:25,045 --> 00:00:27,046
Here, why don't you...
why don't you try some?
12
00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:29,081
Oh, no!
13
00:00:29,116 --> 00:00:30,709
Oh, I'm so sorry.
14
00:00:30,710 --> 00:00:33,846
Why don't you come to the laundry room
with me and I'll help you get it out.
15
00:00:35,823 --> 00:00:37,790
Gabi, I don't even care about this shirt.
16
00:00:37,825 --> 00:00:38,958
I found it in a dumpster...
17
00:00:42,896 --> 00:00:46,799
(Chuckles) Oh, I see what you're doing.
18
00:00:46,834 --> 00:00:48,868
Quick, spill some on my pants.
19
00:00:48,902 --> 00:00:50,803
Ooh, I see what you're doing.
20
00:00:50,838 --> 00:00:51,804
(Giggles)
21
00:00:55,542 --> 00:00:58,845
You know what, I feel really bad
about sneaking behind Josh's back...
22
00:00:58,879 --> 00:01:01,648
But it's also kind of hot.
23
00:01:01,682 --> 00:01:04,651
It's fascinating that your criminal
tendencies bring on arousal.
24
00:01:04,685 --> 00:01:08,288
Wow, look at you with the sexy talk.
25
00:01:08,322 --> 00:01:10,323
Okay, let's get out of here
before Josh gets suspicious.
26
00:01:10,357 --> 00:01:11,524
Oh, whoa, what about the stain?
27
00:01:11,558 --> 00:01:13,126
Should I take the shirt off?
28
00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:15,061
You do that and we'll
never get out of here.
29
00:01:16,930 --> 00:01:18,798
(Theme music playing)
30
00:01:20,989 --> 00:01:24,045
Sync and corrected by thatjulio
www.addic7ed.com
31
00:01:25,773 --> 00:01:28,541
I think I'm going to like this juice fast.
32
00:01:28,575 --> 00:01:29,842
All these colorful bottles...
33
00:01:29,877 --> 00:01:32,578
it's like a rainbow of health.
34
00:01:32,613 --> 00:01:36,649
Screw health, there better be a skinny
Yolanda at the end of this rainbow.
35
00:01:38,185 --> 00:01:41,120
This one's called "Morning
Madness." I wonder why.
36
00:01:44,091 --> 00:01:46,359
Oh, I see why.
37
00:01:46,393 --> 00:01:48,294
(Laughing)
38
00:01:50,964 --> 00:01:51,898
Uh-oh.
39
00:01:53,100 --> 00:01:55,635
- Hey, Elliot, where you going?
- Talk later!
40
00:01:57,871 --> 00:01:58,871
So I'll see you tonight at my place?
41
00:01:58,906 --> 00:02:00,773
- Yeah.
- Why are you going to Gabi's?
42
00:02:00,808 --> 00:02:02,408
- Ah!
- Josh!
43
00:02:02,443 --> 00:02:04,777
Wait, you two aren't...
44
00:02:04,812 --> 00:02:06,479
Dating? No!
45
00:02:06,513 --> 00:02:07,480
We would never go out behind your back.
46
00:02:07,514 --> 00:02:08,581
That would be deceitful.
47
00:02:08,615 --> 00:02:11,184
I don't even find her attractive anymore.
48
00:02:12,486 --> 00:02:14,253
I mean, you know, no, thanks!
49
00:02:14,288 --> 00:02:15,321
Pass!
50
00:02:17,358 --> 00:02:19,792
We get it.
51
00:02:19,827 --> 00:02:21,194
So why are you going to her place?
52
00:02:21,228 --> 00:02:24,964
(Scoffs) Well, he's coming to see, um...
53
00:02:24,998 --> 00:02:26,733
Sofia.
54
00:02:26,767 --> 00:02:28,501
You're dating Sofia?
55
00:02:28,535 --> 00:02:29,469
Go, Coop!
56
00:02:29,503 --> 00:02:31,504
Yeah! Yeah, who knew.
57
00:02:31,538 --> 00:02:32,872
And you're okay with this, Gabi?
58
00:02:32,906 --> 00:02:34,607
Of course.
59
00:02:34,641 --> 00:02:37,677
Without me, their entire
relationship would not exist.
60
00:02:37,711 --> 00:02:39,612
I mean, I introduced
them a couple of weeks ago
61
00:02:39,646 --> 00:02:41,347
and they just... they
hit it off like crazy.
62
00:02:41,382 --> 00:02:44,350
Yeah, this whole thing is crazy.
63
00:02:45,986 --> 00:02:47,053
Why didn't you guys just tell me?
64
00:02:48,055 --> 00:02:49,255
It was new.
65
00:02:49,289 --> 00:02:52,125
So, so new.
66
00:02:52,159 --> 00:02:55,728
Well, how about tomorrow night Caroline
and I take you and Sofia to dinner?
67
00:02:56,764 --> 00:02:57,730
- Um...
- Um...
68
00:02:57,765 --> 00:03:01,567
Or I could cook for you guys here
so I can keep an eye on things,
69
00:03:01,602 --> 00:03:03,403
like... like the dinner.
70
00:03:05,272 --> 00:03:07,340
Yeah, cool. Just something simple.
71
00:03:07,374 --> 00:03:09,208
Of course, Josh.
72
00:03:09,243 --> 00:03:11,144
Wouldn't want to cook up
anything too complicated.
73
00:03:17,217 --> 00:03:19,919
Radio DJ: And the phone lines are open.
74
00:03:19,953 --> 00:03:22,054
Oh, come on. Mama needs
a new pair of tickets.
75
00:03:22,089 --> 00:03:23,122
Please, please, please.
76
00:03:23,157 --> 00:03:26,826
Radio DJ: Jose from Stockton, you're
our ninth caller! You just won tickets
77
00:03:26,860 --> 00:03:28,795
to the sold-out Lorde concert.
78
00:03:28,829 --> 00:03:30,830
Are you sure Sofia's
going to be okay with this?
79
00:03:30,864 --> 00:03:31,898
Oh, yeah. Don't worry about it.
80
00:03:31,932 --> 00:03:35,601
You suck, Jose from Stockton. I hate you!
81
00:03:35,636 --> 00:03:38,304
Okay, maybe worry a little bit.
82
00:03:38,338 --> 00:03:40,373
I was talking to the radio.
83
00:03:40,407 --> 00:03:43,142
I have been trying to
win Lorde tickets all day.
84
00:03:43,177 --> 00:03:46,179
Oh... well, you know what's
going to make you feel better?
85
00:03:47,347 --> 00:03:50,149
Me making you an amazing
dinner tomorrow night.
86
00:03:50,184 --> 00:03:52,084
What'd you do?
87
00:03:52,119 --> 00:03:54,086
(Sighs) Why is it every time
I try and do something nice
88
00:03:54,121 --> 00:03:55,121
you think it's 'cause I did something bad?
89
00:03:55,155 --> 00:03:56,589
Well, did you?
90
00:03:56,623 --> 00:03:58,591
I did.
91
00:03:58,625 --> 00:04:00,793
Is it gonna ruin my
night, my week or my life?
92
00:04:00,828 --> 00:04:03,529
(Chuckles) You're so funny...
93
00:04:03,564 --> 00:04:05,364
And pretty.
94
00:04:05,399 --> 00:04:07,500
No wonder Cooper wants to take you
on a date with Josh and Caroline.
95
00:04:07,534 --> 00:04:09,235
What?
96
00:04:09,269 --> 00:04:11,204
Look, Josh almost caught
me and Cooper together,
97
00:04:11,238 --> 00:04:13,306
and I covered and I said
he was going out with you.
98
00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:16,042
At first I thought it was a bad idea,
99
00:04:16,076 --> 00:04:19,111
but now that I hear it, it's horrendous.
100
00:04:19,146 --> 00:04:21,881
- It's gonna be fun.
- Hm...
101
00:04:21,915 --> 00:04:23,883
An uncomfortable way.
102
00:04:23,951 --> 00:04:25,985
Well, no, it's not gonna
be uncomfortable at all...
103
00:04:26,019 --> 00:04:27,086
See, I told you she'd be fine with it.
104
00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:29,856
'Cause I'm not going.
105
00:04:29,890 --> 00:04:30,890
No, you have to.
106
00:04:30,924 --> 00:04:32,658
What's the word I'm looking for? No.
107
00:04:32,693 --> 00:04:33,860
But I'm making your
favorite hors d'oeuvres.
108
00:04:33,894 --> 00:04:35,495
- No.
- And I have a plan
109
00:04:35,529 --> 00:04:36,496
that you're gonna break
up with Cooper at dinner.
110
00:04:36,530 --> 00:04:37,663
Oh. No.
111
00:04:39,333 --> 00:04:41,534
Okay, I'm just gonna keep asking
until you say yes, all right?
112
00:04:41,568 --> 00:04:43,603
(Spanish accent) I'm going
to ask in a Spanish accent.
113
00:04:43,637 --> 00:04:46,339
(Baby voice) I'm going
to ask like a little baby.
114
00:04:46,373 --> 00:04:48,074
(Robot voice) I'm going to ask
like a robot.
115
00:04:48,108 --> 00:04:51,344
Okay, okay. I will do it, but
I'm not gonna be happy about it.
116
00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:53,813
Oh, see? Cooper won't either.
117
00:04:53,847 --> 00:04:55,815
You guys have so much in common already.
118
00:05:00,053 --> 00:05:01,854
Oh my damn. (Sniffing)
119
00:05:01,889 --> 00:05:04,857
What the hell is that smell?
120
00:05:04,892 --> 00:05:08,594
Oh, it's stuffed mushrooms with
garlic, eggplant and parmesan.
121
00:05:08,629 --> 00:05:10,396
She was being rhetorical, bitch!
122
00:05:11,698 --> 00:05:14,433
Sorry, day two of our juice cleanse.
123
00:05:16,603 --> 00:05:18,337
I just need one sniff.
124
00:05:20,207 --> 00:05:22,008
Oh, yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
125
00:05:22,042 --> 00:05:23,075
Oh, let me get in there.
126
00:05:24,344 --> 00:05:26,245
Oh, that's good stuff.
127
00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:27,947
- Yeah.
- Real good stuff.
128
00:05:27,981 --> 00:05:29,749
Put that down!
129
00:05:29,783 --> 00:05:31,784
Just one more sniff. I
can stop anytime I want.
130
00:05:31,818 --> 00:05:34,654
Oh, no, this is breaking bad.
131
00:05:40,727 --> 00:05:42,828
Oh, Juju, this is so much fun.
132
00:05:42,863 --> 00:05:45,398
How much longer?
133
00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:46,432
They're right there.
134
00:05:46,466 --> 00:05:47,400
I know.
135
00:05:47,434 --> 00:05:48,634
How much longer?
136
00:05:50,671 --> 00:05:52,271
(Gabi chuckles)
137
00:05:52,339 --> 00:05:54,273
Aren't these two so cute together?
138
00:05:54,308 --> 00:05:57,076
The way they keep scooting
towards each other.
139
00:05:58,211 --> 00:05:59,245
(Nervous laugh)
140
00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:02,815
So, did Sofia tell you that
she got promoted at work?
141
00:06:02,849 --> 00:06:04,884
You did? Congratulations...
142
00:06:04,918 --> 00:06:07,853
Again.
143
00:06:07,888 --> 00:06:10,890
I know that she got promoted
because we're dating.
144
00:06:12,492 --> 00:06:14,393
Good for you, Sofia.
145
00:06:14,428 --> 00:06:18,264
Yeah, it only took two years for my
meteoric rise from intern to assistant.
146
00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:21,300
I now work for Garber of
Garber, Stukenbaker, and Rizz.
147
00:06:21,335 --> 00:06:22,335
- Winston Garber?
- Yeah.
148
00:06:22,369 --> 00:06:24,270
- That's my godfather.
- No way!
149
00:06:24,304 --> 00:06:26,238
Though, I call him "Dickie Donut."
150
00:06:26,273 --> 00:06:31,110
You call Mr. Garber, "Dickie Donut"?
151
00:06:31,144 --> 00:06:33,145
Well, the only nickname I
get to call him is "sir."
152
00:06:33,180 --> 00:06:34,847
Why do you call him that?
153
00:06:34,881 --> 00:06:38,684
Well, you know that limerick, "there
once was a man from nantucket"?
154
00:06:38,719 --> 00:06:40,653
That's Dickie. But with a donut.
155
00:06:40,687 --> 00:06:42,488
(Laughing)
156
00:06:47,361 --> 00:06:48,628
(Boisterous laughing)
157
00:06:48,662 --> 00:06:50,563
I just can't get over how
great you two are together.
158
00:06:50,597 --> 00:06:53,366
Well, who wouldn't want to be
with this caramel-coated angel?
159
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:54,500
(Laughs)
160
00:06:54,534 --> 00:06:59,905
Wow, that was... A little bit racist
but flattering at the same time.
161
00:07:01,174 --> 00:07:02,174
You are amazing.
162
00:07:02,209 --> 00:07:04,076
(Gasps) Thank you for getting me.
163
00:07:04,111 --> 00:07:08,681
So sorry to interrupt, but can I borrow
my caramel-coated friend for a minute?
164
00:07:10,817 --> 00:07:14,620
Can I just say, when I grow
up I want to be Caroline!
165
00:07:14,655 --> 00:07:16,522
Yeah, yeah. She's tall.
166
00:07:16,556 --> 00:07:18,791
Um, listen, I just want to go over
the break-up plan really quick.
167
00:07:18,825 --> 00:07:21,727
Okay, you're gonna text me, I'm gonna
pretend it's from my ex-boyfriend,
168
00:07:21,762 --> 00:07:23,629
Cooper will get mad, we'll fight, break up,
169
00:07:23,664 --> 00:07:25,598
and then hopefully Caroline
and I will stay friends.
170
00:07:25,632 --> 00:07:27,166
Okay.
171
00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:30,136
So Josh and I can't agree on what
singer to hire for the wedding.
172
00:07:30,170 --> 00:07:33,039
He wants Harry Connick
Jr. I want John Legend.
173
00:07:33,073 --> 00:07:35,041
(Laughs) Why don't you just get Lorde?
174
00:07:35,075 --> 00:07:37,877
Well, she's a guest and
I'd hate to ask her to sing.
175
00:07:37,911 --> 00:07:39,779
(Giggling)
176
00:07:41,715 --> 00:07:43,949
You know Lorde?!
177
00:07:43,984 --> 00:07:46,886
Sofia loves Lorde.
178
00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:49,355
I know this 'cause we're dating.
179
00:07:51,391 --> 00:07:54,427
I have been trying to win
Lorde tickets all week.
180
00:07:54,461 --> 00:07:55,461
Really?
181
00:07:55,495 --> 00:07:57,129
Well, I can get us tickets...
182
00:07:57,164 --> 00:07:58,497
And backstage passes.
183
00:07:58,532 --> 00:08:01,067
- We can go together.
- Really?
184
00:08:02,302 --> 00:08:04,336
- (Cell phone chimes)
- Oh.
185
00:08:04,371 --> 00:08:07,973
Uh, is that your ex-boyfriend
texting you again?
186
00:08:12,112 --> 00:08:13,612
Nope.
187
00:08:14,981 --> 00:08:16,615
So tell me about Lorde.
188
00:08:26,048 --> 00:08:28,917
Oh, angry baking I see.
189
00:08:30,527 --> 00:08:31,777
Well, good night.
190
00:08:32,655 --> 00:08:35,623
Oh, so you're gonna be able to sleep
after betraying your best friend?
191
00:08:35,658 --> 00:08:37,592
Okay, someone's a little mad.
192
00:08:37,626 --> 00:08:39,327
You were supposed to break
up with Cooper at dinner,
193
00:08:39,361 --> 00:08:40,361
not make plans for another date.
194
00:08:40,396 --> 00:08:41,596
It's not a date, okay?
195
00:08:41,630 --> 00:08:46,267
We're just driving with another couple
to see a concert and then go to dinner.
196
00:08:46,302 --> 00:08:48,169
Actually, that does sound like a date.
197
00:08:48,204 --> 00:08:50,205
You strayed very far from the plan.
198
00:08:50,239 --> 00:08:53,107
Yeah, a plan that you just
assumed that I would go along with,
199
00:08:53,142 --> 00:08:54,876
like I do all your plans.
200
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:57,812
You know what? You take me for granted.
201
00:08:57,846 --> 00:08:59,914
(Scoffs) I do not take you for granted.
202
00:08:59,949 --> 00:09:02,817
You agreed to the plan
and then you went rogue.
203
00:09:02,851 --> 00:09:05,587
For Lorde!
204
00:09:05,621 --> 00:09:08,356
Well, you know what?
No, I forbid you to go.
205
00:09:08,390 --> 00:09:09,691
Forbid me?
206
00:09:09,725 --> 00:09:14,295
Well, nobody forbids Sofia Maria
Consuela Rafaella Rodriguez!
207
00:09:15,397 --> 00:09:19,133
Not only am I going to the
concert, I am out of here.
208
00:09:20,202 --> 00:09:22,103
(Door slams)
209
00:09:22,137 --> 00:09:24,105
Fine!
210
00:09:24,139 --> 00:09:26,074
Now it's time for some angry eating.
211
00:09:29,845 --> 00:09:31,012
(Sadly) Oh, that's so good.
212
00:09:35,718 --> 00:09:36,851
Good morning, Gabi.
213
00:09:36,885 --> 00:09:37,852
Oh, hey, Josh.
214
00:09:39,555 --> 00:09:40,521
You okay?
215
00:09:40,556 --> 00:09:41,522
Not really.
216
00:09:41,557 --> 00:09:44,325
Sofia didn't come home last night
and I have no idea where she is.
217
00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:45,727
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
218
00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:50,198
She's, uh, right there.
I'll be in my office.
219
00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:52,567
Sofia?
220
00:09:52,601 --> 00:09:54,068
Oh, hi, Gabi.
221
00:09:55,170 --> 00:09:57,105
You spent the night here?
222
00:09:57,139 --> 00:10:00,008
Sure did. Caroline invited me.
223
00:10:00,042 --> 00:10:02,076
Sofia sit down and have some breakfast.
224
00:10:02,111 --> 00:10:03,978
Um, could we get two coffees?
225
00:10:07,016 --> 00:10:09,784
(Chuckles) Here you go.
226
00:10:09,818 --> 00:10:11,019
(Whispers) What's going on?
227
00:10:11,053 --> 00:10:12,654
Oh, no need to whisper.
228
00:10:12,688 --> 00:10:14,055
Sofia told me everything.
229
00:10:14,089 --> 00:10:15,890
"Everything" everything?
230
00:10:15,924 --> 00:10:20,628
Yes, she called me last night and could
tell that I was upset, so I told her why...
231
00:10:20,663 --> 00:10:21,763
Cooper and I broke up.
232
00:10:21,797 --> 00:10:23,531
(Sighs) Thank God.
233
00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:29,370
I mean, I'm so sorry for you.
234
00:10:29,405 --> 00:10:31,439
It is sad, but I made her feel better.
235
00:10:31,473 --> 00:10:33,207
We're still going to see Lorde.
236
00:10:33,242 --> 00:10:35,376
Oh, Caroline, you're the best.
237
00:10:35,411 --> 00:10:37,145
A good, good friend.
238
00:10:37,179 --> 00:10:40,114
You've been friends for three hours!
239
00:10:41,283 --> 00:10:42,917
Oh my God.
240
00:10:42,951 --> 00:10:44,686
That's the longest
friendship I've ever had.
241
00:10:48,757 --> 00:10:51,726
Whoo, this cleanse is cleansing
me out of my will to live.
242
00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:55,396
I'm so hungry, I'd slap your
mamma for some caramel corn.
243
00:10:56,765 --> 00:11:00,501
Well, why don't you complain
about it some more, you whiny hag!
244
00:11:00,536 --> 00:11:01,636
I'm sorry.
245
00:11:01,670 --> 00:11:04,372
I feel like in the final
round of the Hunger Games.
246
00:11:06,175 --> 00:11:07,542
Why'd we go on this damn thing anyway?
247
00:11:09,545 --> 00:11:12,413
My ex-husband just got engaged...
248
00:11:12,448 --> 00:11:14,248
To a 28-year-old...
249
00:11:14,283 --> 00:11:17,085
Who's, you know, 28 years old.
250
00:11:17,119 --> 00:11:20,021
Which means I've got to get
back into my fighting weight...
251
00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:22,857
In case I got to fight her.
252
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:25,159
So... so why did you go on this diet?
253
00:11:25,194 --> 00:11:26,961
If I tell you, you'll laugh.
254
00:11:26,995 --> 00:11:28,096
Just cough it up!
255
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,766
Sorry, low blood sugar.
256
00:11:34,570 --> 00:11:36,637
Some guys I used to work
with back in the '80s
257
00:11:36,672 --> 00:11:38,506
are visiting and I just
want to look my best.
258
00:11:38,540 --> 00:11:40,375
Oh, why would I laugh at that?
259
00:11:40,409 --> 00:11:45,446
Because we were exotic dancers
called "The Boy Toys of Illinois."
260
00:11:49,118 --> 00:11:50,318
Oh, I gotta see this.
261
00:11:52,087 --> 00:11:54,021
- (Pop music playing)
- (Women cheering)
262
00:11:55,257 --> 00:11:56,891
(Whip cracks)
263
00:12:08,904 --> 00:12:10,838
(Laughing)
264
00:12:13,442 --> 00:12:14,575
I got... I got...
265
00:12:15,811 --> 00:12:18,646
I'm laughing so hard, I'm
burning all kinds of calories.
266
00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:23,618
Gabi, I'm not really
in the mood to make out.
267
00:12:23,652 --> 00:12:25,119
No, me either.
268
00:12:25,154 --> 00:12:26,354
Sofia and I got into the biggest fight.
269
00:12:26,388 --> 00:12:27,388
Everything is so messed up.
270
00:12:27,423 --> 00:12:29,157
Don't worry, I have a plan.
271
00:12:29,191 --> 00:12:32,260
Okay, I'm really good
at pattern recognition,
272
00:12:32,294 --> 00:12:36,964
and every time you say you have
a plan, something bad happens.
273
00:12:37,399 --> 00:12:39,567
No no, it'll fix this
whole mess Sofia made.
274
00:12:39,601 --> 00:12:42,203
Gabi, this isn't Sofia's fault.
275
00:12:42,237 --> 00:12:44,939
If you hadn't told her
to lie in the first place,
276
00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:46,040
none of this would have ever happened.
277
00:12:46,074 --> 00:12:48,809
Well, excuse me for
really, really liking you
278
00:12:48,844 --> 00:12:50,177
and doing everything I can
so that we can be together.
279
00:12:50,212 --> 00:12:54,615
All of this lying and deception is
really making my shingles flare up.
280
00:12:55,617 --> 00:12:57,585
And they've been dormant a very long time.
281
00:12:59,521 --> 00:13:03,157
Well, how else are we supposed to see
each other without losing our jobs?
282
00:13:03,191 --> 00:13:08,162
Gabi, you're adorable and
so much fun to be around,
283
00:13:08,196 --> 00:13:11,098
but I just don't know if I'm
up for the non-stop adventure
284
00:13:11,133 --> 00:13:13,934
that comes with being your boyfriend.
285
00:13:13,969 --> 00:13:16,170
I hope we can be friends.
286
00:13:16,204 --> 00:13:18,005
Yeah, me too...
287
00:13:18,040 --> 00:13:19,874
Or that you die in a
fire... I mean, me too.
288
00:13:29,563 --> 00:13:31,664
For lunch today, I made
a Chinese chicken salad
289
00:13:31,699 --> 00:13:34,467
with radicchio, fresh orange
slices, and crispy wontons.
290
00:13:34,501 --> 00:13:36,436
Enjoy. (Whimpering)
291
00:13:36,470 --> 00:13:38,471
Well, just leave one. Cooper left early.
292
00:13:38,905 --> 00:13:40,806
He's really bummed out
about the breakup with Sofia.
293
00:13:40,841 --> 00:13:42,741
(Crying)
294
00:13:42,776 --> 00:13:43,809
Whoa.
295
00:13:43,844 --> 00:13:45,578
You're taking this pretty hard.
296
00:13:45,612 --> 00:13:48,514
Uh, yeah, they were just
a really great couple.
297
00:13:48,548 --> 00:13:49,548
I was really rooting for them.
298
00:13:49,583 --> 00:13:50,516
Oh, me too.
299
00:13:50,550 --> 00:13:53,519
And they weren't really dating, I
was the one who was dating Cooper.
300
00:13:53,553 --> 00:13:56,088
Wait. What?
301
00:13:56,123 --> 00:13:57,256
What are you talking about?
302
00:13:57,290 --> 00:13:58,424
What about dinner with Sofia?
303
00:13:58,458 --> 00:14:01,160
It was fake. I made her go.
304
00:14:01,194 --> 00:14:03,195
In my defense, I had a whole plan.
305
00:14:03,230 --> 00:14:05,131
So I wouldn't find out.
306
00:14:05,165 --> 00:14:06,899
Look, this only happened
because of your stupid rule
307
00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:08,167
about not dating anybody
that you work with.
308
00:14:08,201 --> 00:14:09,735
I had no choice.
309
00:14:09,769 --> 00:14:11,937
You could have... Not dated him.
310
00:14:14,574 --> 00:14:17,676
You know, Gabi, I gotta be honest, I'm
less than thrilled with you right now.
311
00:14:17,711 --> 00:14:20,579
Listen, I know I probably deserve
to be yelled at, but can you just...
312
00:14:20,614 --> 00:14:23,349
can you just not be my boss
right now and just be my friend?
313
00:14:23,383 --> 00:14:25,351
'Cause I really need one.
314
00:14:25,385 --> 00:14:27,386
Of course.
315
00:14:27,420 --> 00:14:29,355
(Sighs) I'm just really upset.
316
00:14:29,389 --> 00:14:31,557
I feel like I lost the best
relationship I ever had.
317
00:14:31,591 --> 00:14:33,292
Come on, has it even been a week?
318
00:14:33,326 --> 00:14:35,461
No, I'm not talking about Cooper.
319
00:14:35,495 --> 00:14:37,930
I'm talking about Sofia.
320
00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:40,199
Oh.
321
00:14:40,233 --> 00:14:42,701
She's been my best friend
since seventh grade,
322
00:14:42,736 --> 00:14:44,937
and now I feel like Caroline's
gonna take her away from me.
323
00:14:44,971 --> 00:14:46,705
I wouldn't worry about Caroline.
324
00:14:46,740 --> 00:14:47,840
She tires of her friends pretty quickly.
325
00:14:47,874 --> 00:14:49,742
I don't even learn their names anymore.
326
00:14:49,776 --> 00:14:52,578
Well, she won't ditch Sofia.
327
00:14:52,612 --> 00:14:53,846
She's a keeper.
328
00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:56,549
And so are you.
329
00:14:56,583 --> 00:14:59,285
Look, we're all going to Lorde tonight,
so why don't you grab Cooper's extra ticket
330
00:14:59,319 --> 00:15:01,453
and you and Sofia can
maybe work things out.
331
00:15:01,488 --> 00:15:04,456
This is a really special night for her, and
if I go, it'll just ruin the whole thing.
332
00:15:04,491 --> 00:15:06,258
Do you want me to say something?
333
00:15:06,293 --> 00:15:08,127
No, please don't say anything.
334
00:15:08,161 --> 00:15:09,995
Promise me you won't say anything.
335
00:15:10,030 --> 00:15:11,163
Okay.
336
00:15:12,299 --> 00:15:13,365
And one last thing...
337
00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:18,037
- Are Cooper and I fired?
- No.
338
00:15:18,071 --> 00:15:19,872
Then can I go home early?
I've had a really hard day.
339
00:15:21,775 --> 00:15:22,741
Go.
340
00:15:22,776 --> 00:15:24,677
And can I take this extra salad?
341
00:15:24,711 --> 00:15:25,644
'Cause I already tossed
it with the dressing and...
342
00:15:25,679 --> 00:15:26,745
Go!
343
00:15:30,884 --> 00:15:32,718
Wow. (Chuckles)
344
00:15:32,752 --> 00:15:35,321
Last time I was in a limo was for my prom.
345
00:15:35,355 --> 00:15:38,524
F.Y.I., if somebody pukes in
here... security deposit? Gone.
346
00:15:38,558 --> 00:15:40,326
To new best friends.
347
00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:41,360
Oh.
348
00:15:41,394 --> 00:15:42,428
And old ones.
349
00:15:42,462 --> 00:15:46,065
But more new. (Laughs)
350
00:15:46,099 --> 00:15:48,133
You're being kind of quiet.
351
00:15:48,168 --> 00:15:49,868
(Tersely) Get in the party mood.
352
00:15:51,171 --> 00:15:52,805
Sofia, can you take a photo of us?
353
00:15:52,839 --> 00:15:54,073
Sure.
354
00:15:55,875 --> 00:15:56,842
Okay.
355
00:15:56,876 --> 00:15:58,744
- (Sighs) Um...
- (Phone chimes)
356
00:15:58,778 --> 00:16:01,547
Oh, Josh, you just got a text from Gabi.
357
00:16:01,581 --> 00:16:04,750
"Remember, don't tell Sofia
that Cooper broke up with me.
358
00:16:04,784 --> 00:16:06,518
Hope she's having fun."
359
00:16:07,687 --> 00:16:09,221
Cooper broke up with her?
360
00:16:09,256 --> 00:16:12,324
You didn't hear it from me, but... yes.
361
00:16:12,359 --> 00:16:14,526
Oh my God.
362
00:16:14,561 --> 00:16:17,062
- Okay, stop the limo.
- Wait, what's going on?
363
00:16:17,097 --> 00:16:18,197
Okay, uh...
364
00:16:18,231 --> 00:16:19,365
I wasn't really dating Cooper.
365
00:16:19,399 --> 00:16:22,067
I was only pretending to
for Gabi so that Cooper
366
00:16:22,102 --> 00:16:23,869
and Gabi wouldn't get in trouble with Josh.
367
00:16:23,903 --> 00:16:25,137
(Gasps)
368
00:16:25,171 --> 00:16:27,139
So you lied to me?
369
00:16:27,173 --> 00:16:32,978
This whole thing was just a sick
charade so... so you could see Lorde.
370
00:16:33,013 --> 00:16:37,483
(Chuckles) I had no idea
you could be so devious.
371
00:16:37,517 --> 00:16:38,851
I didn't think I could love you more!
372
00:16:38,885 --> 00:16:40,686
- Oh!
- (Laughing)
373
00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:42,421
Okay, I love you, too.
374
00:16:42,455 --> 00:16:43,689
I gotta go.
375
00:16:46,393 --> 00:16:49,128
(Exhales)
376
00:16:49,162 --> 00:16:51,096
Limo sex?
377
00:16:51,131 --> 00:16:53,098
- Is there any other kind?
- Get over here.
378
00:16:53,133 --> 00:16:54,133
(Giggling)
379
00:16:57,137 --> 00:17:00,139
Okay, I peed three times.
380
00:17:00,173 --> 00:17:01,874
I'm ready for the moment of truth.
381
00:17:02,909 --> 00:17:04,043
But first my watch.
382
00:17:10,750 --> 00:17:11,750
(Sharp inhale)
383
00:17:11,785 --> 00:17:13,686
Yes, I lost 30 pounds.
384
00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:14,853
What?!
385
00:17:14,888 --> 00:17:16,755
30 pounds?! Let me on there.
386
00:17:17,757 --> 00:17:20,726
(Shrieks) I lost 35.
387
00:17:22,862 --> 00:17:24,396
Wait.
388
00:17:24,431 --> 00:17:28,334
In three days, is that even possible?
389
00:17:28,368 --> 00:17:32,137
Okay, I have a confession.
390
00:17:32,172 --> 00:17:35,541
I wanted you to feel good about yourself
in front of your exotic dancer friends.
391
00:17:35,575 --> 00:17:38,377
So I cheated the scale back 15 pounds.
392
00:17:38,411 --> 00:17:41,347
But that still means that
you lost 15 and I lost 20.
393
00:17:41,381 --> 00:17:47,953
Uh, not really, because I also wanted
you to feel good about yourself,
394
00:17:47,987 --> 00:17:50,089
so I cheated it back 15 pounds.
395
00:17:50,123 --> 00:17:52,858
So I only lost 5 pounds?
396
00:17:52,892 --> 00:17:55,828
Better than me, I didn't lose anything...
397
00:17:57,697 --> 00:17:59,798
Except my self-confidence.
398
00:17:59,833 --> 00:18:00,766
(Doorbell rings)
399
00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:02,968
Oh, no. It's "The Boy Toys."
400
00:18:05,505 --> 00:18:07,506
I'm gonna tell them that Elliot died
401
00:18:07,540 --> 00:18:09,708
in a pole dancing accident
and that I'm Dwayne,
402
00:18:09,743 --> 00:18:11,610
his chubby twin brother.
403
00:18:11,644 --> 00:18:14,913
No no no, you have
nothing to be ashamed of.
404
00:18:14,948 --> 00:18:18,784
Now you open that door and you
be proud of the body God gave you.
405
00:18:28,695 --> 00:18:30,729
Elliot?
406
00:18:30,764 --> 00:18:32,564
Wow, you look great.
407
00:18:33,867 --> 00:18:35,734
Thank you!
408
00:18:35,769 --> 00:18:37,436
So do you.
409
00:18:38,805 --> 00:18:42,541
Not as good as me.
410
00:18:42,575 --> 00:18:44,877
And please tell me that fine
lady standing next to you
411
00:18:44,911 --> 00:18:46,612
is joining us for drinks tonight.
412
00:18:46,646 --> 00:18:50,616
Well, as long as it comes
with a side of buffalo wings
413
00:18:50,650 --> 00:18:51,817
and a pizza...
414
00:18:54,554 --> 00:18:55,654
I'm in.
415
00:18:55,688 --> 00:18:56,789
Hey-yy!
416
00:19:04,964 --> 00:19:07,499
Gabi?
417
00:19:07,534 --> 00:19:08,567
Sofia, what are you doing here?
418
00:19:08,601 --> 00:19:11,637
Well, I couldn't go to the concert
after I heard about you and Cooper.
419
00:19:11,671 --> 00:19:12,638
Are you okay?
420
00:19:12,672 --> 00:19:14,640
You gave up seeing Lorde?
421
00:19:14,674 --> 00:19:15,774
That doesn't matter, what matters is...
422
00:19:15,809 --> 00:19:19,545
No no no, what matters is you, and
that I hate my life without you.
423
00:19:19,579 --> 00:19:22,548
I am so sorry I took you for
granted, and it'll never happen again.
424
00:19:23,983 --> 00:19:26,552
"I will never take you for grant."
425
00:19:28,521 --> 00:19:29,621
Yeah, I ran out of frosting.
426
00:19:29,656 --> 00:19:31,890
Listen, I love you and I'm really sorry.
427
00:19:31,925 --> 00:19:35,828
Oh, no, I'm sorry. I got so excited about
the concert I didn't stick to the plan.
428
00:19:35,862 --> 00:19:39,731
And I got so excited about my
plan, I didn't stick to my girl.
429
00:19:39,766 --> 00:19:44,570
(Spanish accent) So I'm going to
apologize in a Spanish accent, okay?
430
00:19:44,604 --> 00:19:46,939
(Baby voice) And I'm gonna
apologize like a little baby.
431
00:19:46,973 --> 00:19:48,907
(Robot voice) And I'm going
to apologize like a robot.
432
00:19:48,942 --> 00:19:50,843
Okay, okay, I forgive you.
433
00:19:50,877 --> 00:19:52,544
So, uh...
434
00:19:52,579 --> 00:19:56,682
Why don't you grab the cake, I got
the wine, we turn on "The Notebook",
435
00:19:56,716 --> 00:19:58,650
and let's get you over Cooper.
436
00:19:58,685 --> 00:20:01,520
Eh, who needs Cooper when
I have the best friend ever?
437
00:20:01,554 --> 00:20:02,688
Here you go.
438
00:20:04,591 --> 00:20:06,592
- (Sighs)
- (Muffled) Oh my God.
439
00:20:06,626 --> 00:20:07,726
(Muffled) Oh, I'm so good at my job.
440
00:20:13,120 --> 00:20:15,112
I can't believe you
invited Caroline over here.
441
00:20:15,113 --> 00:20:16,932
I can't believe she said, "yes."
442
00:20:18,192 --> 00:20:21,327
She probably just wants the blood of young
girls for her face cream or something.
443
00:20:21,361 --> 00:20:24,330
Will you relax? We're just having lunch.
444
00:20:24,364 --> 00:20:26,165
Hmm, that's what Hannibal Lecter said.
445
00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:27,533
(Knocking)
446
00:20:27,568 --> 00:20:30,036
She's here! Ah!
447
00:20:32,039 --> 00:20:33,272
- Hi!
- Hi!
448
00:20:38,045 --> 00:20:39,212
No.
449
00:20:39,246 --> 00:20:41,247
No no no no no.
450
00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:42,248
(Scoffs) Oh no.
451
00:20:48,128 --> 00:20:50,081
I thought she�d never leave.
452
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,552
Sync and corrected by thatjulio
www.addic7ed.com
453
00:20:51,602 --> 00:20:56,152
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