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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,057 --> 00:00:04,910 All right, sorry about the close quarters, Coop. 2 00:00:04,911 --> 00:00:06,455 We're gonna be working from the home office for a while. 3 00:00:06,456 --> 00:00:07,630 Yeah, it sucks. 4 00:00:07,631 --> 00:00:11,038 Panoramic view, fiber-optic wi-fi, working toilets. 5 00:00:11,538 --> 00:00:12,932 Cheeseburgers on pretzel bread. 6 00:00:12,966 --> 00:00:15,034 That's it, I quit. 7 00:00:15,068 --> 00:00:17,837 Cooper, wait until you try Gabi's waffle fries. 8 00:00:17,871 --> 00:00:20,706 With my special, secret-recipe ketchup. 9 00:00:20,741 --> 00:00:21,908 Ooh, what's the secret? 10 00:00:21,942 --> 00:00:23,009 (Whispers) Bought it at the store. 11 00:00:25,045 --> 00:00:27,046 Here, why don't you... why don't you try some? 12 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:29,081 Oh, no! 13 00:00:29,116 --> 00:00:30,709 Oh, I'm so sorry. 14 00:00:30,710 --> 00:00:33,846 Why don't you come to the laundry room with me and I'll help you get it out. 15 00:00:35,823 --> 00:00:37,790 Gabi, I don't even care about this shirt. 16 00:00:37,825 --> 00:00:38,958 I found it in a dumpster... 17 00:00:42,896 --> 00:00:46,799 (Chuckles) Oh, I see what you're doing. 18 00:00:46,834 --> 00:00:48,868 Quick, spill some on my pants. 19 00:00:48,902 --> 00:00:50,803 Ooh, I see what you're doing. 20 00:00:50,838 --> 00:00:51,804 (Giggles) 21 00:00:55,542 --> 00:00:58,845 You know what, I feel really bad about sneaking behind Josh's back... 22 00:00:58,879 --> 00:01:01,648 But it's also kind of hot. 23 00:01:01,682 --> 00:01:04,651 It's fascinating that your criminal tendencies bring on arousal. 24 00:01:04,685 --> 00:01:08,288 Wow, look at you with the sexy talk. 25 00:01:08,322 --> 00:01:10,323 Okay, let's get out of here before Josh gets suspicious. 26 00:01:10,357 --> 00:01:11,524 Oh, whoa, what about the stain? 27 00:01:11,558 --> 00:01:13,126 Should I take the shirt off? 28 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:15,061 You do that and we'll never get out of here. 29 00:01:16,930 --> 00:01:18,798 (Theme music playing) 30 00:01:20,989 --> 00:01:24,045 Sync and corrected by thatjulio www.addic7ed.com 31 00:01:25,773 --> 00:01:28,541 I think I'm going to like this juice fast. 32 00:01:28,575 --> 00:01:29,842 All these colorful bottles... 33 00:01:29,877 --> 00:01:32,578 it's like a rainbow of health. 34 00:01:32,613 --> 00:01:36,649 Screw health, there better be a skinny Yolanda at the end of this rainbow. 35 00:01:38,185 --> 00:01:41,120 This one's called "Morning Madness." I wonder why. 36 00:01:44,091 --> 00:01:46,359 Oh, I see why. 37 00:01:46,393 --> 00:01:48,294 (Laughing) 38 00:01:50,964 --> 00:01:51,898 Uh-oh. 39 00:01:53,100 --> 00:01:55,635 - Hey, Elliot, where you going? - Talk later! 40 00:01:57,871 --> 00:01:58,871 So I'll see you tonight at my place? 41 00:01:58,906 --> 00:02:00,773 - Yeah. - Why are you going to Gabi's? 42 00:02:00,808 --> 00:02:02,408 - Ah! - Josh! 43 00:02:02,443 --> 00:02:04,777 Wait, you two aren't... 44 00:02:04,812 --> 00:02:06,479 Dating? No! 45 00:02:06,513 --> 00:02:07,480 We would never go out behind your back. 46 00:02:07,514 --> 00:02:08,581 That would be deceitful. 47 00:02:08,615 --> 00:02:11,184 I don't even find her attractive anymore. 48 00:02:12,486 --> 00:02:14,253 I mean, you know, no, thanks! 49 00:02:14,288 --> 00:02:15,321 Pass! 50 00:02:17,358 --> 00:02:19,792 We get it. 51 00:02:19,827 --> 00:02:21,194 So why are you going to her place? 52 00:02:21,228 --> 00:02:24,964 (Scoffs) Well, he's coming to see, um... 53 00:02:24,998 --> 00:02:26,733 Sofia. 54 00:02:26,767 --> 00:02:28,501 You're dating Sofia? 55 00:02:28,535 --> 00:02:29,469 Go, Coop! 56 00:02:29,503 --> 00:02:31,504 Yeah! Yeah, who knew. 57 00:02:31,538 --> 00:02:32,872 And you're okay with this, Gabi? 58 00:02:32,906 --> 00:02:34,607 Of course. 59 00:02:34,641 --> 00:02:37,677 Without me, their entire relationship would not exist. 60 00:02:37,711 --> 00:02:39,612 I mean, I introduced them a couple of weeks ago 61 00:02:39,646 --> 00:02:41,347 and they just... they hit it off like crazy. 62 00:02:41,382 --> 00:02:44,350 Yeah, this whole thing is crazy. 63 00:02:45,986 --> 00:02:47,053 Why didn't you guys just tell me? 64 00:02:48,055 --> 00:02:49,255 It was new. 65 00:02:49,289 --> 00:02:52,125 So, so new. 66 00:02:52,159 --> 00:02:55,728 Well, how about tomorrow night Caroline and I take you and Sofia to dinner? 67 00:02:56,764 --> 00:02:57,730 - Um... - Um... 68 00:02:57,765 --> 00:03:01,567 Or I could cook for you guys here so I can keep an eye on things, 69 00:03:01,602 --> 00:03:03,403 like... like the dinner. 70 00:03:05,272 --> 00:03:07,340 Yeah, cool. Just something simple. 71 00:03:07,374 --> 00:03:09,208 Of course, Josh. 72 00:03:09,243 --> 00:03:11,144 Wouldn't want to cook up anything too complicated. 73 00:03:17,217 --> 00:03:19,919 Radio DJ: And the phone lines are open. 74 00:03:19,953 --> 00:03:22,054 Oh, come on. Mama needs a new pair of tickets. 75 00:03:22,089 --> 00:03:23,122 Please, please, please. 76 00:03:23,157 --> 00:03:26,826 Radio DJ: Jose from Stockton, you're our ninth caller! You just won tickets 77 00:03:26,860 --> 00:03:28,795 to the sold-out Lorde concert. 78 00:03:28,829 --> 00:03:30,830 Are you sure Sofia's going to be okay with this? 79 00:03:30,864 --> 00:03:31,898 Oh, yeah. Don't worry about it. 80 00:03:31,932 --> 00:03:35,601 You suck, Jose from Stockton. I hate you! 81 00:03:35,636 --> 00:03:38,304 Okay, maybe worry a little bit. 82 00:03:38,338 --> 00:03:40,373 I was talking to the radio. 83 00:03:40,407 --> 00:03:43,142 I have been trying to win Lorde tickets all day. 84 00:03:43,177 --> 00:03:46,179 Oh... well, you know what's going to make you feel better? 85 00:03:47,347 --> 00:03:50,149 Me making you an amazing dinner tomorrow night. 86 00:03:50,184 --> 00:03:52,084 What'd you do? 87 00:03:52,119 --> 00:03:54,086 (Sighs) Why is it every time I try and do something nice 88 00:03:54,121 --> 00:03:55,121 you think it's 'cause I did something bad? 89 00:03:55,155 --> 00:03:56,589 Well, did you? 90 00:03:56,623 --> 00:03:58,591 I did. 91 00:03:58,625 --> 00:04:00,793 Is it gonna ruin my night, my week or my life? 92 00:04:00,828 --> 00:04:03,529 (Chuckles) You're so funny... 93 00:04:03,564 --> 00:04:05,364 And pretty. 94 00:04:05,399 --> 00:04:07,500 No wonder Cooper wants to take you on a date with Josh and Caroline. 95 00:04:07,534 --> 00:04:09,235 What? 96 00:04:09,269 --> 00:04:11,204 Look, Josh almost caught me and Cooper together, 97 00:04:11,238 --> 00:04:13,306 and I covered and I said he was going out with you. 98 00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:16,042 At first I thought it was a bad idea, 99 00:04:16,076 --> 00:04:19,111 but now that I hear it, it's horrendous. 100 00:04:19,146 --> 00:04:21,881 - It's gonna be fun. - Hm... 101 00:04:21,915 --> 00:04:23,883 An uncomfortable way. 102 00:04:23,951 --> 00:04:25,985 Well, no, it's not gonna be uncomfortable at all... 103 00:04:26,019 --> 00:04:27,086 See, I told you she'd be fine with it. 104 00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:29,856 'Cause I'm not going. 105 00:04:29,890 --> 00:04:30,890 No, you have to. 106 00:04:30,924 --> 00:04:32,658 What's the word I'm looking for? No. 107 00:04:32,693 --> 00:04:33,860 But I'm making your favorite hors d'oeuvres. 108 00:04:33,894 --> 00:04:35,495 - No. - And I have a plan 109 00:04:35,529 --> 00:04:36,496 that you're gonna break up with Cooper at dinner. 110 00:04:36,530 --> 00:04:37,663 Oh. No. 111 00:04:39,333 --> 00:04:41,534 Okay, I'm just gonna keep asking until you say yes, all right? 112 00:04:41,568 --> 00:04:43,603 (Spanish accent) I'm going to ask in a Spanish accent. 113 00:04:43,637 --> 00:04:46,339 (Baby voice) I'm going to ask like a little baby. 114 00:04:46,373 --> 00:04:48,074 (Robot voice) I'm going to ask like a robot. 115 00:04:48,108 --> 00:04:51,344 Okay, okay. I will do it, but I'm not gonna be happy about it. 116 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:53,813 Oh, see? Cooper won't either. 117 00:04:53,847 --> 00:04:55,815 You guys have so much in common already. 118 00:05:00,053 --> 00:05:01,854 Oh my damn. (Sniffing) 119 00:05:01,889 --> 00:05:04,857 What the hell is that smell? 120 00:05:04,892 --> 00:05:08,594 Oh, it's stuffed mushrooms with garlic, eggplant and parmesan. 121 00:05:08,629 --> 00:05:10,396 She was being rhetorical, bitch! 122 00:05:11,698 --> 00:05:14,433 Sorry, day two of our juice cleanse. 123 00:05:16,603 --> 00:05:18,337 I just need one sniff. 124 00:05:20,207 --> 00:05:22,008 Oh, yeah, that's what I'm talking about. 125 00:05:22,042 --> 00:05:23,075 Oh, let me get in there. 126 00:05:24,344 --> 00:05:26,245 Oh, that's good stuff. 127 00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:27,947 - Yeah. - Real good stuff. 128 00:05:27,981 --> 00:05:29,749 Put that down! 129 00:05:29,783 --> 00:05:31,784 Just one more sniff. I can stop anytime I want. 130 00:05:31,818 --> 00:05:34,654 Oh, no, this is breaking bad. 131 00:05:40,727 --> 00:05:42,828 Oh, Juju, this is so much fun. 132 00:05:42,863 --> 00:05:45,398 How much longer? 133 00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:46,432 They're right there. 134 00:05:46,466 --> 00:05:47,400 I know. 135 00:05:47,434 --> 00:05:48,634 How much longer? 136 00:05:50,671 --> 00:05:52,271 (Gabi chuckles) 137 00:05:52,339 --> 00:05:54,273 Aren't these two so cute together? 138 00:05:54,308 --> 00:05:57,076 The way they keep scooting towards each other. 139 00:05:58,211 --> 00:05:59,245 (Nervous laugh) 140 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:02,815 So, did Sofia tell you that she got promoted at work? 141 00:06:02,849 --> 00:06:04,884 You did? Congratulations... 142 00:06:04,918 --> 00:06:07,853 Again. 143 00:06:07,888 --> 00:06:10,890 I know that she got promoted because we're dating. 144 00:06:12,492 --> 00:06:14,393 Good for you, Sofia. 145 00:06:14,428 --> 00:06:18,264 Yeah, it only took two years for my meteoric rise from intern to assistant. 146 00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:21,300 I now work for Garber of Garber, Stukenbaker, and Rizz. 147 00:06:21,335 --> 00:06:22,335 - Winston Garber? - Yeah. 148 00:06:22,369 --> 00:06:24,270 - That's my godfather. - No way! 149 00:06:24,304 --> 00:06:26,238 Though, I call him "Dickie Donut." 150 00:06:26,273 --> 00:06:31,110 You call Mr. Garber, "Dickie Donut"? 151 00:06:31,144 --> 00:06:33,145 Well, the only nickname I get to call him is "sir." 152 00:06:33,180 --> 00:06:34,847 Why do you call him that? 153 00:06:34,881 --> 00:06:38,684 Well, you know that limerick, "there once was a man from nantucket"? 154 00:06:38,719 --> 00:06:40,653 That's Dickie. But with a donut. 155 00:06:40,687 --> 00:06:42,488 (Laughing) 156 00:06:47,361 --> 00:06:48,628 (Boisterous laughing) 157 00:06:48,662 --> 00:06:50,563 I just can't get over how great you two are together. 158 00:06:50,597 --> 00:06:53,366 Well, who wouldn't want to be with this caramel-coated angel? 159 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:54,500 (Laughs) 160 00:06:54,534 --> 00:06:59,905 Wow, that was... A little bit racist but flattering at the same time. 161 00:07:01,174 --> 00:07:02,174 You are amazing. 162 00:07:02,209 --> 00:07:04,076 (Gasps) Thank you for getting me. 163 00:07:04,111 --> 00:07:08,681 So sorry to interrupt, but can I borrow my caramel-coated friend for a minute? 164 00:07:10,817 --> 00:07:14,620 Can I just say, when I grow up I want to be Caroline! 165 00:07:14,655 --> 00:07:16,522 Yeah, yeah. She's tall. 166 00:07:16,556 --> 00:07:18,791 Um, listen, I just want to go over the break-up plan really quick. 167 00:07:18,825 --> 00:07:21,727 Okay, you're gonna text me, I'm gonna pretend it's from my ex-boyfriend, 168 00:07:21,762 --> 00:07:23,629 Cooper will get mad, we'll fight, break up, 169 00:07:23,664 --> 00:07:25,598 and then hopefully Caroline and I will stay friends. 170 00:07:25,632 --> 00:07:27,166 Okay. 171 00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:30,136 So Josh and I can't agree on what singer to hire for the wedding. 172 00:07:30,170 --> 00:07:33,039 He wants Harry Connick Jr. I want John Legend. 173 00:07:33,073 --> 00:07:35,041 (Laughs) Why don't you just get Lorde? 174 00:07:35,075 --> 00:07:37,877 Well, she's a guest and I'd hate to ask her to sing. 175 00:07:37,911 --> 00:07:39,779 (Giggling) 176 00:07:41,715 --> 00:07:43,949 You know Lorde?! 177 00:07:43,984 --> 00:07:46,886 Sofia loves Lorde. 178 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:49,355 I know this 'cause we're dating. 179 00:07:51,391 --> 00:07:54,427 I have been trying to win Lorde tickets all week. 180 00:07:54,461 --> 00:07:55,461 Really? 181 00:07:55,495 --> 00:07:57,129 Well, I can get us tickets... 182 00:07:57,164 --> 00:07:58,497 And backstage passes. 183 00:07:58,532 --> 00:08:01,067 - We can go together. - Really? 184 00:08:02,302 --> 00:08:04,336 - (Cell phone chimes) - Oh. 185 00:08:04,371 --> 00:08:07,973 Uh, is that your ex-boyfriend texting you again? 186 00:08:12,112 --> 00:08:13,612 Nope. 187 00:08:14,981 --> 00:08:16,615 So tell me about Lorde. 188 00:08:26,048 --> 00:08:28,917 Oh, angry baking I see. 189 00:08:30,527 --> 00:08:31,777 Well, good night. 190 00:08:32,655 --> 00:08:35,623 Oh, so you're gonna be able to sleep after betraying your best friend? 191 00:08:35,658 --> 00:08:37,592 Okay, someone's a little mad. 192 00:08:37,626 --> 00:08:39,327 You were supposed to break up with Cooper at dinner, 193 00:08:39,361 --> 00:08:40,361 not make plans for another date. 194 00:08:40,396 --> 00:08:41,596 It's not a date, okay? 195 00:08:41,630 --> 00:08:46,267 We're just driving with another couple to see a concert and then go to dinner. 196 00:08:46,302 --> 00:08:48,169 Actually, that does sound like a date. 197 00:08:48,204 --> 00:08:50,205 You strayed very far from the plan. 198 00:08:50,239 --> 00:08:53,107 Yeah, a plan that you just assumed that I would go along with, 199 00:08:53,142 --> 00:08:54,876 like I do all your plans. 200 00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:57,812 You know what? You take me for granted. 201 00:08:57,846 --> 00:08:59,914 (Scoffs) I do not take you for granted. 202 00:08:59,949 --> 00:09:02,817 You agreed to the plan and then you went rogue. 203 00:09:02,851 --> 00:09:05,587 For Lorde! 204 00:09:05,621 --> 00:09:08,356 Well, you know what? No, I forbid you to go. 205 00:09:08,390 --> 00:09:09,691 Forbid me? 206 00:09:09,725 --> 00:09:14,295 Well, nobody forbids Sofia Maria Consuela Rafaella Rodriguez! 207 00:09:15,397 --> 00:09:19,133 Not only am I going to the concert, I am out of here. 208 00:09:20,202 --> 00:09:22,103 (Door slams) 209 00:09:22,137 --> 00:09:24,105 Fine! 210 00:09:24,139 --> 00:09:26,074 Now it's time for some angry eating. 211 00:09:29,845 --> 00:09:31,012 (Sadly) Oh, that's so good. 212 00:09:35,718 --> 00:09:36,851 Good morning, Gabi. 213 00:09:36,885 --> 00:09:37,852 Oh, hey, Josh. 214 00:09:39,555 --> 00:09:40,521 You okay? 215 00:09:40,556 --> 00:09:41,522 Not really. 216 00:09:41,557 --> 00:09:44,325 Sofia didn't come home last night and I have no idea where she is. 217 00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:45,727 - Good morning. - Good morning. 218 00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:50,198 She's, uh, right there. I'll be in my office. 219 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:52,567 Sofia? 220 00:09:52,601 --> 00:09:54,068 Oh, hi, Gabi. 221 00:09:55,170 --> 00:09:57,105 You spent the night here? 222 00:09:57,139 --> 00:10:00,008 Sure did. Caroline invited me. 223 00:10:00,042 --> 00:10:02,076 Sofia sit down and have some breakfast. 224 00:10:02,111 --> 00:10:03,978 Um, could we get two coffees? 225 00:10:07,016 --> 00:10:09,784 (Chuckles) Here you go. 226 00:10:09,818 --> 00:10:11,019 (Whispers) What's going on? 227 00:10:11,053 --> 00:10:12,654 Oh, no need to whisper. 228 00:10:12,688 --> 00:10:14,055 Sofia told me everything. 229 00:10:14,089 --> 00:10:15,890 "Everything" everything? 230 00:10:15,924 --> 00:10:20,628 Yes, she called me last night and could tell that I was upset, so I told her why... 231 00:10:20,663 --> 00:10:21,763 Cooper and I broke up. 232 00:10:21,797 --> 00:10:23,531 (Sighs) Thank God. 233 00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:29,370 I mean, I'm so sorry for you. 234 00:10:29,405 --> 00:10:31,439 It is sad, but I made her feel better. 235 00:10:31,473 --> 00:10:33,207 We're still going to see Lorde. 236 00:10:33,242 --> 00:10:35,376 Oh, Caroline, you're the best. 237 00:10:35,411 --> 00:10:37,145 A good, good friend. 238 00:10:37,179 --> 00:10:40,114 You've been friends for three hours! 239 00:10:41,283 --> 00:10:42,917 Oh my God. 240 00:10:42,951 --> 00:10:44,686 That's the longest friendship I've ever had. 241 00:10:48,757 --> 00:10:51,726 Whoo, this cleanse is cleansing me out of my will to live. 242 00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:55,396 I'm so hungry, I'd slap your mamma for some caramel corn. 243 00:10:56,765 --> 00:11:00,501 Well, why don't you complain about it some more, you whiny hag! 244 00:11:00,536 --> 00:11:01,636 I'm sorry. 245 00:11:01,670 --> 00:11:04,372 I feel like in the final round of the Hunger Games. 246 00:11:06,175 --> 00:11:07,542 Why'd we go on this damn thing anyway? 247 00:11:09,545 --> 00:11:12,413 My ex-husband just got engaged... 248 00:11:12,448 --> 00:11:14,248 To a 28-year-old... 249 00:11:14,283 --> 00:11:17,085 Who's, you know, 28 years old. 250 00:11:17,119 --> 00:11:20,021 Which means I've got to get back into my fighting weight... 251 00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:22,857 In case I got to fight her. 252 00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:25,159 So... so why did you go on this diet? 253 00:11:25,194 --> 00:11:26,961 If I tell you, you'll laugh. 254 00:11:26,995 --> 00:11:28,096 Just cough it up! 255 00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,766 Sorry, low blood sugar. 256 00:11:34,570 --> 00:11:36,637 Some guys I used to work with back in the '80s 257 00:11:36,672 --> 00:11:38,506 are visiting and I just want to look my best. 258 00:11:38,540 --> 00:11:40,375 Oh, why would I laugh at that? 259 00:11:40,409 --> 00:11:45,446 Because we were exotic dancers called "The Boy Toys of Illinois." 260 00:11:49,118 --> 00:11:50,318 Oh, I gotta see this. 261 00:11:52,087 --> 00:11:54,021 - (Pop music playing) - (Women cheering) 262 00:11:55,257 --> 00:11:56,891 (Whip cracks) 263 00:12:08,904 --> 00:12:10,838 (Laughing) 264 00:12:13,442 --> 00:12:14,575 I got... I got... 265 00:12:15,811 --> 00:12:18,646 I'm laughing so hard, I'm burning all kinds of calories. 266 00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:23,618 Gabi, I'm not really in the mood to make out. 267 00:12:23,652 --> 00:12:25,119 No, me either. 268 00:12:25,154 --> 00:12:26,354 Sofia and I got into the biggest fight. 269 00:12:26,388 --> 00:12:27,388 Everything is so messed up. 270 00:12:27,423 --> 00:12:29,157 Don't worry, I have a plan. 271 00:12:29,191 --> 00:12:32,260 Okay, I'm really good at pattern recognition, 272 00:12:32,294 --> 00:12:36,964 and every time you say you have a plan, something bad happens. 273 00:12:37,399 --> 00:12:39,567 No no, it'll fix this whole mess Sofia made. 274 00:12:39,601 --> 00:12:42,203 Gabi, this isn't Sofia's fault. 275 00:12:42,237 --> 00:12:44,939 If you hadn't told her to lie in the first place, 276 00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:46,040 none of this would have ever happened. 277 00:12:46,074 --> 00:12:48,809 Well, excuse me for really, really liking you 278 00:12:48,844 --> 00:12:50,177 and doing everything I can so that we can be together. 279 00:12:50,212 --> 00:12:54,615 All of this lying and deception is really making my shingles flare up. 280 00:12:55,617 --> 00:12:57,585 And they've been dormant a very long time. 281 00:12:59,521 --> 00:13:03,157 Well, how else are we supposed to see each other without losing our jobs? 282 00:13:03,191 --> 00:13:08,162 Gabi, you're adorable and so much fun to be around, 283 00:13:08,196 --> 00:13:11,098 but I just don't know if I'm up for the non-stop adventure 284 00:13:11,133 --> 00:13:13,934 that comes with being your boyfriend. 285 00:13:13,969 --> 00:13:16,170 I hope we can be friends. 286 00:13:16,204 --> 00:13:18,005 Yeah, me too... 287 00:13:18,040 --> 00:13:19,874 Or that you die in a fire... I mean, me too. 288 00:13:29,563 --> 00:13:31,664 For lunch today, I made a Chinese chicken salad 289 00:13:31,699 --> 00:13:34,467 with radicchio, fresh orange slices, and crispy wontons. 290 00:13:34,501 --> 00:13:36,436 Enjoy. (Whimpering) 291 00:13:36,470 --> 00:13:38,471 Well, just leave one. Cooper left early. 292 00:13:38,905 --> 00:13:40,806 He's really bummed out about the breakup with Sofia. 293 00:13:40,841 --> 00:13:42,741 (Crying) 294 00:13:42,776 --> 00:13:43,809 Whoa. 295 00:13:43,844 --> 00:13:45,578 You're taking this pretty hard. 296 00:13:45,612 --> 00:13:48,514 Uh, yeah, they were just a really great couple. 297 00:13:48,548 --> 00:13:49,548 I was really rooting for them. 298 00:13:49,583 --> 00:13:50,516 Oh, me too. 299 00:13:50,550 --> 00:13:53,519 And they weren't really dating, I was the one who was dating Cooper. 300 00:13:53,553 --> 00:13:56,088 Wait. What? 301 00:13:56,123 --> 00:13:57,256 What are you talking about? 302 00:13:57,290 --> 00:13:58,424 What about dinner with Sofia? 303 00:13:58,458 --> 00:14:01,160 It was fake. I made her go. 304 00:14:01,194 --> 00:14:03,195 In my defense, I had a whole plan. 305 00:14:03,230 --> 00:14:05,131 So I wouldn't find out. 306 00:14:05,165 --> 00:14:06,899 Look, this only happened because of your stupid rule 307 00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:08,167 about not dating anybody that you work with. 308 00:14:08,201 --> 00:14:09,735 I had no choice. 309 00:14:09,769 --> 00:14:11,937 You could have... Not dated him. 310 00:14:14,574 --> 00:14:17,676 You know, Gabi, I gotta be honest, I'm less than thrilled with you right now. 311 00:14:17,711 --> 00:14:20,579 Listen, I know I probably deserve to be yelled at, but can you just... 312 00:14:20,614 --> 00:14:23,349 can you just not be my boss right now and just be my friend? 313 00:14:23,383 --> 00:14:25,351 'Cause I really need one. 314 00:14:25,385 --> 00:14:27,386 Of course. 315 00:14:27,420 --> 00:14:29,355 (Sighs) I'm just really upset. 316 00:14:29,389 --> 00:14:31,557 I feel like I lost the best relationship I ever had. 317 00:14:31,591 --> 00:14:33,292 Come on, has it even been a week? 318 00:14:33,326 --> 00:14:35,461 No, I'm not talking about Cooper. 319 00:14:35,495 --> 00:14:37,930 I'm talking about Sofia. 320 00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:40,199 Oh. 321 00:14:40,233 --> 00:14:42,701 She's been my best friend since seventh grade, 322 00:14:42,736 --> 00:14:44,937 and now I feel like Caroline's gonna take her away from me. 323 00:14:44,971 --> 00:14:46,705 I wouldn't worry about Caroline. 324 00:14:46,740 --> 00:14:47,840 She tires of her friends pretty quickly. 325 00:14:47,874 --> 00:14:49,742 I don't even learn their names anymore. 326 00:14:49,776 --> 00:14:52,578 Well, she won't ditch Sofia. 327 00:14:52,612 --> 00:14:53,846 She's a keeper. 328 00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:56,549 And so are you. 329 00:14:56,583 --> 00:14:59,285 Look, we're all going to Lorde tonight, so why don't you grab Cooper's extra ticket 330 00:14:59,319 --> 00:15:01,453 and you and Sofia can maybe work things out. 331 00:15:01,488 --> 00:15:04,456 This is a really special night for her, and if I go, it'll just ruin the whole thing. 332 00:15:04,491 --> 00:15:06,258 Do you want me to say something? 333 00:15:06,293 --> 00:15:08,127 No, please don't say anything. 334 00:15:08,161 --> 00:15:09,995 Promise me you won't say anything. 335 00:15:10,030 --> 00:15:11,163 Okay. 336 00:15:12,299 --> 00:15:13,365 And one last thing... 337 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:18,037 - Are Cooper and I fired? - No. 338 00:15:18,071 --> 00:15:19,872 Then can I go home early? I've had a really hard day. 339 00:15:21,775 --> 00:15:22,741 Go. 340 00:15:22,776 --> 00:15:24,677 And can I take this extra salad? 341 00:15:24,711 --> 00:15:25,644 'Cause I already tossed it with the dressing and... 342 00:15:25,679 --> 00:15:26,745 Go! 343 00:15:30,884 --> 00:15:32,718 Wow. (Chuckles) 344 00:15:32,752 --> 00:15:35,321 Last time I was in a limo was for my prom. 345 00:15:35,355 --> 00:15:38,524 F.Y.I., if somebody pukes in here... security deposit? Gone. 346 00:15:38,558 --> 00:15:40,326 To new best friends. 347 00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:41,360 Oh. 348 00:15:41,394 --> 00:15:42,428 And old ones. 349 00:15:42,462 --> 00:15:46,065 But more new. (Laughs) 350 00:15:46,099 --> 00:15:48,133 You're being kind of quiet. 351 00:15:48,168 --> 00:15:49,868 (Tersely) Get in the party mood. 352 00:15:51,171 --> 00:15:52,805 Sofia, can you take a photo of us? 353 00:15:52,839 --> 00:15:54,073 Sure. 354 00:15:55,875 --> 00:15:56,842 Okay. 355 00:15:56,876 --> 00:15:58,744 - (Sighs) Um... - (Phone chimes) 356 00:15:58,778 --> 00:16:01,547 Oh, Josh, you just got a text from Gabi. 357 00:16:01,581 --> 00:16:04,750 "Remember, don't tell Sofia that Cooper broke up with me. 358 00:16:04,784 --> 00:16:06,518 Hope she's having fun." 359 00:16:07,687 --> 00:16:09,221 Cooper broke up with her? 360 00:16:09,256 --> 00:16:12,324 You didn't hear it from me, but... yes. 361 00:16:12,359 --> 00:16:14,526 Oh my God. 362 00:16:14,561 --> 00:16:17,062 - Okay, stop the limo. - Wait, what's going on? 363 00:16:17,097 --> 00:16:18,197 Okay, uh... 364 00:16:18,231 --> 00:16:19,365 I wasn't really dating Cooper. 365 00:16:19,399 --> 00:16:22,067 I was only pretending to for Gabi so that Cooper 366 00:16:22,102 --> 00:16:23,869 and Gabi wouldn't get in trouble with Josh. 367 00:16:23,903 --> 00:16:25,137 (Gasps) 368 00:16:25,171 --> 00:16:27,139 So you lied to me? 369 00:16:27,173 --> 00:16:32,978 This whole thing was just a sick charade so... so you could see Lorde. 370 00:16:33,013 --> 00:16:37,483 (Chuckles) I had no idea you could be so devious. 371 00:16:37,517 --> 00:16:38,851 I didn't think I could love you more! 372 00:16:38,885 --> 00:16:40,686 - Oh! - (Laughing) 373 00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:42,421 Okay, I love you, too. 374 00:16:42,455 --> 00:16:43,689 I gotta go. 375 00:16:46,393 --> 00:16:49,128 (Exhales) 376 00:16:49,162 --> 00:16:51,096 Limo sex? 377 00:16:51,131 --> 00:16:53,098 - Is there any other kind? - Get over here. 378 00:16:53,133 --> 00:16:54,133 (Giggling) 379 00:16:57,137 --> 00:17:00,139 Okay, I peed three times. 380 00:17:00,173 --> 00:17:01,874 I'm ready for the moment of truth. 381 00:17:02,909 --> 00:17:04,043 But first my watch. 382 00:17:10,750 --> 00:17:11,750 (Sharp inhale) 383 00:17:11,785 --> 00:17:13,686 Yes, I lost 30 pounds. 384 00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:14,853 What?! 385 00:17:14,888 --> 00:17:16,755 30 pounds?! Let me on there. 386 00:17:17,757 --> 00:17:20,726 (Shrieks) I lost 35. 387 00:17:22,862 --> 00:17:24,396 Wait. 388 00:17:24,431 --> 00:17:28,334 In three days, is that even possible? 389 00:17:28,368 --> 00:17:32,137 Okay, I have a confession. 390 00:17:32,172 --> 00:17:35,541 I wanted you to feel good about yourself in front of your exotic dancer friends. 391 00:17:35,575 --> 00:17:38,377 So I cheated the scale back 15 pounds. 392 00:17:38,411 --> 00:17:41,347 But that still means that you lost 15 and I lost 20. 393 00:17:41,381 --> 00:17:47,953 Uh, not really, because I also wanted you to feel good about yourself, 394 00:17:47,987 --> 00:17:50,089 so I cheated it back 15 pounds. 395 00:17:50,123 --> 00:17:52,858 So I only lost 5 pounds? 396 00:17:52,892 --> 00:17:55,828 Better than me, I didn't lose anything... 397 00:17:57,697 --> 00:17:59,798 Except my self-confidence. 398 00:17:59,833 --> 00:18:00,766 (Doorbell rings) 399 00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:02,968 Oh, no. It's "The Boy Toys." 400 00:18:05,505 --> 00:18:07,506 I'm gonna tell them that Elliot died 401 00:18:07,540 --> 00:18:09,708 in a pole dancing accident and that I'm Dwayne, 402 00:18:09,743 --> 00:18:11,610 his chubby twin brother. 403 00:18:11,644 --> 00:18:14,913 No no no, you have nothing to be ashamed of. 404 00:18:14,948 --> 00:18:18,784 Now you open that door and you be proud of the body God gave you. 405 00:18:28,695 --> 00:18:30,729 Elliot? 406 00:18:30,764 --> 00:18:32,564 Wow, you look great. 407 00:18:33,867 --> 00:18:35,734 Thank you! 408 00:18:35,769 --> 00:18:37,436 So do you. 409 00:18:38,805 --> 00:18:42,541 Not as good as me. 410 00:18:42,575 --> 00:18:44,877 And please tell me that fine lady standing next to you 411 00:18:44,911 --> 00:18:46,612 is joining us for drinks tonight. 412 00:18:46,646 --> 00:18:50,616 Well, as long as it comes with a side of buffalo wings 413 00:18:50,650 --> 00:18:51,817 and a pizza... 414 00:18:54,554 --> 00:18:55,654 I'm in. 415 00:18:55,688 --> 00:18:56,789 Hey-yy! 416 00:19:04,964 --> 00:19:07,499 Gabi? 417 00:19:07,534 --> 00:19:08,567 Sofia, what are you doing here? 418 00:19:08,601 --> 00:19:11,637 Well, I couldn't go to the concert after I heard about you and Cooper. 419 00:19:11,671 --> 00:19:12,638 Are you okay? 420 00:19:12,672 --> 00:19:14,640 You gave up seeing Lorde? 421 00:19:14,674 --> 00:19:15,774 That doesn't matter, what matters is... 422 00:19:15,809 --> 00:19:19,545 No no no, what matters is you, and that I hate my life without you. 423 00:19:19,579 --> 00:19:22,548 I am so sorry I took you for granted, and it'll never happen again. 424 00:19:23,983 --> 00:19:26,552 "I will never take you for grant." 425 00:19:28,521 --> 00:19:29,621 Yeah, I ran out of frosting. 426 00:19:29,656 --> 00:19:31,890 Listen, I love you and I'm really sorry. 427 00:19:31,925 --> 00:19:35,828 Oh, no, I'm sorry. I got so excited about the concert I didn't stick to the plan. 428 00:19:35,862 --> 00:19:39,731 And I got so excited about my plan, I didn't stick to my girl. 429 00:19:39,766 --> 00:19:44,570 (Spanish accent) So I'm going to apologize in a Spanish accent, okay? 430 00:19:44,604 --> 00:19:46,939 (Baby voice) And I'm gonna apologize like a little baby. 431 00:19:46,973 --> 00:19:48,907 (Robot voice) And I'm going to apologize like a robot. 432 00:19:48,942 --> 00:19:50,843 Okay, okay, I forgive you. 433 00:19:50,877 --> 00:19:52,544 So, uh... 434 00:19:52,579 --> 00:19:56,682 Why don't you grab the cake, I got the wine, we turn on "The Notebook", 435 00:19:56,716 --> 00:19:58,650 and let's get you over Cooper. 436 00:19:58,685 --> 00:20:01,520 Eh, who needs Cooper when I have the best friend ever? 437 00:20:01,554 --> 00:20:02,688 Here you go. 438 00:20:04,591 --> 00:20:06,592 - (Sighs) - (Muffled) Oh my God. 439 00:20:06,626 --> 00:20:07,726 (Muffled) Oh, I'm so good at my job. 440 00:20:13,120 --> 00:20:15,112 I can't believe you invited Caroline over here. 441 00:20:15,113 --> 00:20:16,932 I can't believe she said, "yes." 442 00:20:18,192 --> 00:20:21,327 She probably just wants the blood of young girls for her face cream or something. 443 00:20:21,361 --> 00:20:24,330 Will you relax? We're just having lunch. 444 00:20:24,364 --> 00:20:26,165 Hmm, that's what Hannibal Lecter said. 445 00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:27,533 (Knocking) 446 00:20:27,568 --> 00:20:30,036 She's here! Ah! 447 00:20:32,039 --> 00:20:33,272 - Hi! - Hi! 448 00:20:38,045 --> 00:20:39,212 No. 449 00:20:39,246 --> 00:20:41,247 No no no no no. 450 00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:42,248 (Scoffs) Oh no. 451 00:20:48,128 --> 00:20:50,081 I thought she�d never leave. 452 00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,552 Sync and corrected by thatjulio www.addic7ed.com 453 00:20:51,602 --> 00:20:56,152 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33689

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