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1
00:00:58,825 --> 00:01:00,816
You all right?
2
00:01:01,828 --> 00:01:04,524
You still haven't given me your number.
3
00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:05,792
No.
4
00:01:06,800 --> 00:01:08,131
Mary...
5
00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:12,204
it's the same for me.
6
00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:14,763
- Honestly?
- I was just as nervous as you were.
7
00:01:15,942 --> 00:01:18,103
In that bathroom, I was a teenager again.
8
00:01:19,179 --> 00:01:21,170
These things happen.
9
00:01:23,283 --> 00:01:25,274
I didn't plan it.
10
00:01:26,052 --> 00:01:28,145
Any more than you did.
11
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:31,589
Don't spoil it, please. Come on.
12
00:01:31,624 --> 00:01:33,319
It's all right.
13
00:01:33,359 --> 00:01:35,350
It's all right!
14
00:01:36,563 --> 00:01:38,554
It's all right.
15
00:01:43,136 --> 00:01:45,127
(Tinker) It's gone in, so it's got to come out.
16
00:01:52,145 --> 00:01:54,113
What make is that?
17
00:01:54,147 --> 00:01:55,580
Boeing?
18
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:03,278
- Keep at it, lads!
- Lovejoy, let's go shopping.
19
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:34,851
(Camera clicks)
20
00:02:55,208 --> 00:02:58,803
Ah! I suppose you want to know
what Lovejoy's doing
21
00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:03,407
swanning around the country in a limo
and swilling champagne at - what is it? -
22
00:03:03,449 --> 00:03:05,974
11:20 on a Thursday morning? (Tuts)
23
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:08,010
Well, I'll tell you.
24
00:03:09,222 --> 00:03:11,486
Greg Veitch of Sydney,
25
00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:15,460
that's Sydney, Australia, where
the soaps come from and the Ashes go to.
26
00:03:15,495 --> 00:03:17,520
He's up from Oz to buy a few antiques.
27
00:03:17,564 --> 00:03:21,728
Don't knock it. 10% of whatever he buys.
28
00:03:21,768 --> 00:03:24,066
There's so many
unscrupulous types about.
29
00:03:24,103 --> 00:03:27,937
You know what I mean. Part of my brief
is to make sure he does not get done over.
30
00:03:27,974 --> 00:03:31,102
Or, if he does get done over,
it's me that does it.
31
00:03:31,144 --> 00:03:33,908
- Lovejoy!
- Greg!
32
00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:35,938
Excuse me.
33
00:03:36,549 --> 00:03:41,646
Look at the patina on that.
Centuries of use, regular polishing.
34
00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:43,849
- You like it?
- I love it. It's beautiful.
35
00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:46,085
- Talk me through it.
- You testing me again?
36
00:03:46,125 --> 00:03:48,992
No, I'm here to learn
as well as lighten my wallet.
37
00:03:49,028 --> 00:03:51,189
Silver, George the First,
38
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:53,529
approximately...
39
00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:56,091
Uh... approximately 28 ounces.
40
00:03:56,135 --> 00:03:59,764
- 28 and a half.
- I've failed again.
41
00:03:59,806 --> 00:04:02,502
- So do we haggle?
- There's no hurry.
42
00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:04,772
- It's a bargain.
- Sure it's a bargain.
43
00:04:04,811 --> 00:04:06,802
I'll tell you why.
44
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:11,183
- Not the real thing.
- You're kidding. What, in here?
45
00:04:11,217 --> 00:04:13,742
- It happens.
- But it's got a hallmark, look.
46
00:04:13,786 --> 00:04:18,120
Yeah, sure it has, but look at the space
between the hallmark and the base.
47
00:04:18,157 --> 00:04:21,991
The hallmark's been cut from
a genuine piece and then put in here.
48
00:04:22,028 --> 00:04:25,930
- Are you sure?
- The hallmark's genuine, coffee pot isn't.
49
00:04:25,965 --> 00:04:28,525
Lovejoy, you're an ace.
50
00:04:28,568 --> 00:04:30,559
We're in great trim.
51
00:04:32,672 --> 00:04:35,505
- But I'm still looking for a eureka.
- What's that?
52
00:04:35,541 --> 00:04:40,478
Oh, the biggie, the... the great white.
I won't know it till I see it,
53
00:04:40,513 --> 00:04:43,710
but we gotta give it a burl.
I can't go home without my eureka.
54
00:04:44,651 --> 00:04:45,982
That's what I'm here for.
55
00:04:46,019 --> 00:04:47,350
(Police radio)
56
00:04:49,022 --> 00:04:51,047
Is your husband at home, Mrs. Russell?
57
00:04:51,090 --> 00:04:53,081
No, he's in court.
58
00:04:54,193 --> 00:04:56,184
Identification. May I see some?
59
00:05:02,902 --> 00:05:06,099
Do you recognize him?
60
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,608
- No.
- His name is Blaine.
61
00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:12,076
Jerry Blaine.
62
00:05:12,111 --> 00:05:14,978
- Are you sure?
- Yes, I'm quite sure.
63
00:05:16,783 --> 00:05:18,580
Ahem.
64
00:05:18,618 --> 00:05:20,586
You...
65
00:05:20,620 --> 00:05:22,679
You had lunch with Blaine last Tuesday.
66
00:05:24,824 --> 00:05:26,815
That's not true.
67
00:05:27,794 --> 00:05:29,125
No.
68
00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:37,431
- Were you following me?
- No, we were following him.
69
00:05:37,470 --> 00:05:39,097
Why?
70
00:05:39,138 --> 00:05:41,436
- He has form.
- He's got a prison record.
71
00:05:41,474 --> 00:05:44,773
- Recently released from Wormwood Scrubs.
- I don't believe it.
72
00:05:44,811 --> 00:05:48,076
It's true. We thought he had
a meet fixed with another villain.
73
00:05:50,316 --> 00:05:54,184
- I don't know what to say.
- Blaine was killed last night.
74
00:05:59,158 --> 00:06:01,820
He was shot with a small-caliber pistol.
75
00:06:01,861 --> 00:06:05,695
It's what's known as a virginity protector.
It's a lady's gun.
76
00:06:07,433 --> 00:06:10,368
- I see.
- A known villain with form,
77
00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:12,564
still on parole...
78
00:06:12,605 --> 00:06:14,835
and a judge's wife.
79
00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:17,536
I don't understand.
80
00:06:17,577 --> 00:06:21,069
- Are you accusing me?
- Do you have an alibi for yesterday?
81
00:06:21,114 --> 00:06:24,515
Say, late afternoon, early evening,
four till nine o'clock?
82
00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:27,314
Yes, I... I think I was here.
83
00:06:27,353 --> 00:06:28,911
- Yes, I was.
- Alone?
84
00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,946
- Yes.
- Can you prove that?
85
00:06:32,358 --> 00:06:34,349
- I... I don't know...
- (Phone)
86
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,385
Yes, I think I could. I need...
87
00:06:37,764 --> 00:06:39,095
Excuse me.
88
00:06:40,566 --> 00:06:41,897
60950.
89
00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:46,598
Yes, he is. It's for you.
90
00:06:50,610 --> 00:06:52,009
Shand.
91
00:06:52,044 --> 00:06:54,012
Yes, guv.
92
00:06:54,046 --> 00:06:56,378
Yeah, I'm with her now.
93
00:06:56,416 --> 00:06:58,407
Uh, no, not yet, no.
94
00:06:59,952 --> 00:07:02,352
Yeah. Yeah, will do.
95
00:07:02,388 --> 00:07:04,413
It's the super. He wants a result.
96
00:07:04,457 --> 00:07:07,119
Look, Inspector, if this story gets out...
97
00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:09,390
Yeah, but it's not a story, though, is it?
98
00:07:10,496 --> 00:07:13,988
It will ruin my marriage
and damage my husband's career.
99
00:07:15,968 --> 00:07:18,129
Well, he's already had one heart attack.
100
00:07:19,839 --> 00:07:23,775
- This could kill him!
- What are you suggesting, Mrs. Russell?
101
00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:25,801
I'm not suggesting anything. I'm...
102
00:07:27,380 --> 00:07:29,610
I'm begging you not to take it any further.
103
00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:40,717
You see, the problem is,
you lied, didn't you?
104
00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:43,524
You said you didn't know Blaine.
105
00:07:43,563 --> 00:07:45,690
- I was frightened.
- Cliff?
106
00:07:45,731 --> 00:07:48,598
Well, you're the guv'nor.
107
00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:52,661
- You didn't know Blaine was a criminal?
- I knew nothing about the man at all.
108
00:07:55,241 --> 00:07:56,799
I believe you.
109
00:07:57,910 --> 00:08:01,038
Now, at this stage, it may be containable.
110
00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:05,141
Your name could be
left out the frame for a price.
111
00:08:05,184 --> 00:08:07,414
- Cliff?
- Not my decision.
112
00:08:07,453 --> 00:08:09,785
He plays by the rules, does our Cliff.
113
00:08:09,822 --> 00:08:13,986
You see, the trouble is, it's gone higher
than us. There's others involved.
114
00:08:14,026 --> 00:08:17,723
- How many others?
- The super, the Blaine family brief.
115
00:08:17,763 --> 00:08:20,926
- The police lab that processed the photos.
- Us.
116
00:08:22,735 --> 00:08:25,226
I haven't any money!
117
00:08:25,271 --> 00:08:27,239
Mrs. Russell, please!
118
00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:33,368
This is my husband's house.
119
00:08:33,412 --> 00:08:35,403
He handles the financial affairs.
120
00:08:36,649 --> 00:08:39,447
I've got a few shares, a PEP,
121
00:08:39,485 --> 00:08:41,919
and a small amount in a building society.
122
00:08:41,954 --> 00:08:44,650
- That's all!
- Then sell off a few baubles.
123
00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:47,557
- It shouldn't be too difficult.
- If you move quickly...
124
00:08:47,593 --> 00:08:50,892
- Very quickly.
...we may be able to persuade the super.
125
00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:59,937
(Greg) Did Jameson make all of these?
(Lovejoy) Yeah.
126
00:08:59,972 --> 00:09:03,567
- All of them?
- What do you reckon?
127
00:09:03,609 --> 00:09:06,544
- They're fun, aren't they?
- I think so.
128
00:09:07,680 --> 00:09:09,705
One London dealer bought a lot of them.
129
00:09:09,749 --> 00:09:11,410
Uh-huh.
130
00:09:11,450 --> 00:09:14,613
- Jamie?
- Hey, Lovejoy!
131
00:09:14,654 --> 00:09:17,088
- Greg Veitch.
- G'day.
132
00:09:17,123 --> 00:09:18,750
- How are you?
- Fine.
133
00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:21,726
- How are my lamp brackets?
- Ready by the end of the week.
134
00:09:21,761 --> 00:09:26,755
- Bit meat and potatoes, isn't it, brackets?
- Nine to 12, work. Two to six, play.
135
00:09:26,799 --> 00:09:29,233
- I'll show Greg around, OK?
- Aye, carry on.
136
00:09:29,268 --> 00:09:33,136
- Hear about the Giacometti frauds?
- Twenty million quid's worth.
137
00:09:33,172 --> 00:09:36,767
- What happened?
- Somebody nicked old Alberto's moulds.
138
00:09:36,809 --> 00:09:40,074
- Copies have been popping up all over.
- How naughty.
139
00:09:40,112 --> 00:09:42,103
No chance of us getting hold of any?
140
00:10:51,617 --> 00:10:54,848
No, no, you really should see our place.
It's on the beach.
141
00:10:54,887 --> 00:10:58,721
Uh, three stories,
view of the ocean from every room.
142
00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:01,955
10,000 squares, six bedrooms,
five state-of-the-art baths.
143
00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:05,521
- Oh! A lot of room for two.
- We've got Viv's oldest with us.
144
00:11:05,564 --> 00:11:08,829
- Vivienne's your wife?
- Yeah. She's my third.
145
00:11:08,868 --> 00:11:12,861
I always marry little women.
It takes fewer furs for the coat.
146
00:11:14,874 --> 00:11:18,207
- Was yours a family business?
- Lady Jane,
147
00:11:18,244 --> 00:11:21,441
my old man was so dumb,
when he died they made him into a stock cube.
148
00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:24,677
He couldn't pour piss out of a boot
with instructions on the heel.
149
00:11:24,717 --> 00:11:26,708
Oh, sorry. Being a bit crude there.
150
00:11:26,752 --> 00:11:27,946
(All) Oh...
151
00:11:27,987 --> 00:11:29,648
(All) Ah!
152
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:31,816
(Man) I say!
153
00:11:31,857 --> 00:11:34,587
- Oh! Absolutely beautiful.
- (Applause)
154
00:11:35,728 --> 00:11:39,858
- What's this? Guy Fawkes?
- It's someone's birthday.
155
00:11:39,899 --> 00:11:42,459
Oh, it's Mary Russell.
156
00:11:42,501 --> 00:11:44,765
Anybody you don't know?
157
00:11:44,804 --> 00:11:47,602
Excuse me. I must just go and say
many happy returns.
158
00:11:50,943 --> 00:11:53,503
(Greg) That's a class act.
159
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:56,106
Where do you fit in, Lovejoy?
160
00:11:56,148 --> 00:11:58,139
Family friends.
161
00:11:58,751 --> 00:12:01,447
- You never thought of giving Oz a try?
- No.
162
00:12:01,487 --> 00:12:05,583
Oh, you should. It's changing fast.
Ten years ago they used to joke
163
00:12:05,624 --> 00:12:09,560
what's the difference between Australia
and yogurt? Yogurt has a culture.
164
00:12:09,595 --> 00:12:11,927
How can you tell that
Jesus wasn't an Aussie?
165
00:12:11,964 --> 00:12:15,764
They searched, they couldn't find
three wise men or a virgin.
166
00:12:15,801 --> 00:12:19,635
They don't do those jokes anymore.
Just as well.
167
00:12:19,672 --> 00:12:23,608
It wasn't a birthday.
It's their anniversary.
168
00:12:23,642 --> 00:12:27,169
Lady Jane,
it's time for you to sing for your supper.
169
00:12:27,213 --> 00:12:28,976
Oh, dear.
170
00:12:29,014 --> 00:12:31,676
Well, singing never was my strong suit.
171
00:12:31,717 --> 00:12:35,847
Jane, Lovejoy has worked wonders,
but I still need two or three special pieces.
172
00:12:35,888 --> 00:12:39,881
I've got the crown, the pearls and sundries,
but I've not got the coal and ore.
173
00:12:39,925 --> 00:12:43,258
- Are you with me?
- Mm. Not easy.
174
00:12:43,295 --> 00:12:46,492
If I go home without it,
Viv will throw a tantie.
175
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:49,663
- Oh, thank you, Andrea.
- You're welcome.
176
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:59,104
What about Fairford Hall, Sir Max Spence?
177
00:12:59,145 --> 00:13:00,134
Ah.
178
00:13:00,179 --> 00:13:03,148
- Who's he?
- Impoverished aristocracy.
179
00:13:03,182 --> 00:13:05,548
He's just been clobbered with death duties.
180
00:13:14,260 --> 00:13:17,593
Well, if I have another one,
you're going to have to stay over
181
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:21,191
because I won't trust myself
to drive you home.
182
00:13:21,233 --> 00:13:25,863
- In which case, don't have another one.
- Yeah, I knew you were going to say that.
183
00:13:25,905 --> 00:13:29,466
Well, if you won't do the indecent thing...
184
00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:36,244
Did I tell you, by the way, about this old edition
of the Karma Sutra I've been reading?
185
00:13:36,282 --> 00:13:39,183
- You mentioned it.
- And this chapter on the Hastini,
186
00:13:39,218 --> 00:13:41,277
- or elephant woman.
- Lovejoy...
187
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:45,017
And this position known as
"the twining of the creeper."
188
00:13:45,057 --> 00:13:47,321
- Lovejoy!
- Wait till you've heard about it.
189
00:13:47,359 --> 00:13:50,817
- Stop it!
- It's to do with honey... and black pepper.
190
00:13:50,863 --> 00:13:53,195
- No. Lovejoy!
- Black pepper.
191
00:13:55,868 --> 00:13:58,098
- Something wrong?
- I don't know.
192
00:13:58,137 --> 00:14:00,662
What is it?
193
00:14:00,706 --> 00:14:03,800
Silver spoon.
Probably the one Alex was born with.
194
00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:06,073
- How did that get in there?
- I have no idea.
195
00:14:07,179 --> 00:14:10,910
It's a Carolean sealed top...
196
00:14:10,950 --> 00:14:14,283
initialed with a "W".
No, no, I beg your pardon, that's an "M".
197
00:14:15,988 --> 00:14:17,979
I've never seen it before in my life.
198
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:20,924
It certainly wasn't in my jacket
before we went to Andrea's.
199
00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:23,485
It certainly doesn't come
from any restaurant.
200
00:14:23,529 --> 00:14:26,430
Somebody has put it in the wrong jacket.
201
00:14:26,465 --> 00:14:27,796
Mm.
202
00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:31,860
- Lovejoy.
- Yeah?
203
00:14:33,505 --> 00:14:36,599
What exactly do they do
with black pepper?
204
00:14:37,343 --> 00:14:39,334
Janey, Janey, Janey...
205
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:44,572
Number five was the judge and
Mrs. Russell. Remember the cake?
206
00:14:44,617 --> 00:14:48,348
Every calorie, Andrea.
You got a number for him?
207
00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:52,118
No, but he's the Honorable
Judge Raymond Russell or something.
208
00:14:52,157 --> 00:14:55,354
- Right, two to go.
- One couple, table three.
209
00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:57,362
I never saw them before.
210
00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:58,693
- Plastic?
- Cash.
211
00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,790
- Quaint.
- Two fifties, I remember.
212
00:15:00,833 --> 00:15:03,461
Yes, so would I.
Right, that's one to go.
213
00:15:03,502 --> 00:15:07,438
One businessman, table one.
Mr. Simpson. In the corner.
214
00:15:07,473 --> 00:15:09,703
- He's in your line of business.
- Really?
215
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:11,733
(Speaks Italian)
216
00:15:11,777 --> 00:15:13,506
- Got a number for him?
- Yeah.
217
00:15:13,545 --> 00:15:17,811
Bishop's Stortford 658463.
218
00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:20,648
- And he's booked for lunch.
- Thank you, Andrea.
219
00:15:20,686 --> 00:15:23,120
Hell of a lot of fuss about a spoon.
220
00:15:23,155 --> 00:15:26,750
I don't like it when people give me things.
221
00:15:27,660 --> 00:15:30,185
(Eric) Hello, Lovejoy Associates.
Can I help you?
222
00:15:30,229 --> 00:15:32,857
- Hello, Eric?
- 0h, hello, Lady Jane.
223
00:15:32,898 --> 00:15:37,426
Hello. Tell Lovejoy I'm on my way
to see Sir Max, Sir Max Spence,
224
00:15:37,469 --> 00:15:39,460
and I'll ask if today's a good day for him.
225
00:15:39,505 --> 00:15:41,939
- This afternoon?
- Oh, will that be suitable?
226
00:15:41,974 --> 00:15:42,963
Yes, I'm free.
227
00:15:43,008 --> 00:15:45,909
- Silly sod. I put it in the wrong pocket.
- Careless.
228
00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,436
- Very.
- Why didn't you mention it to Andrea?
229
00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:52,712
I wasn't sure where it happened.
I just knew I was a spoon short.
230
00:15:52,751 --> 00:15:54,776
What does the "P" stand for?
231
00:15:54,820 --> 00:15:57,448
Uh... My wife Pat.
232
00:15:57,489 --> 00:15:59,218
- Patricia.
- Ah!
233
00:15:59,258 --> 00:16:01,249
- What's wrong?
- "P" is an "M".
234
00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:02,624
Ah.
235
00:16:05,731 --> 00:16:09,258
(Tinker) Don't let him see what
you're looking at. Move down, Eric.
236
00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:11,292
- It's George the Third.
- That's right.
237
00:16:11,337 --> 00:16:13,430
Peter and Anne Bateman, 1790s.
238
00:16:14,173 --> 00:16:17,904
- Isn't it a beauty?
- Twenty-odd ounces, I'd say.
239
00:16:17,943 --> 00:16:21,538
Anybody would be thrilled
to own something like that.
240
00:16:21,580 --> 00:16:25,573
- It's not my eureka.
- No, it's not, but it's worth picking up.
241
00:16:25,617 --> 00:16:29,053
Don't go straight to it.
We'll look at something else first.
242
00:16:29,088 --> 00:16:31,079
What's its price, Eric?
243
00:16:34,393 --> 00:16:36,759
- A.B.E.O.
- That's a big help.
244
00:16:36,795 --> 00:16:39,355
- Eight hundred.
- Start at five.
245
00:16:39,398 --> 00:16:43,391
- You'll be lucky!
- Six and they might take you seriously.
246
00:16:43,435 --> 00:16:46,700
Eric, people always take me seriously.
247
00:16:47,706 --> 00:16:50,266
Yeah, of course they do, Greg.
Of course they do.
248
00:16:54,246 --> 00:16:56,373
(Mrs. Russell) I put it there.
249
00:16:56,415 --> 00:16:58,212
Why?
250
00:16:58,250 --> 00:17:00,741
Because I needed to know
if I could trust you.
251
00:17:00,786 --> 00:17:04,278
- Just ask Jane.
- I didn't know how well you knew her.
252
00:17:05,024 --> 00:17:07,925
This could be an expensive way
of checking people out.
253
00:17:08,827 --> 00:17:10,818
I was desperate.
254
00:17:11,597 --> 00:17:13,565
Am desperate.
255
00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:20,632
You need help?
256
00:17:20,672 --> 00:17:24,733
I need to sell some spoons
and replace them with look-alikes
257
00:17:24,777 --> 00:17:26,768
good enough to fool most people.
258
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:30,038
Please, sit down.
259
00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:32,481
Ahem.
260
00:17:33,452 --> 00:17:35,443
Including the judge, for example?
261
00:17:36,922 --> 00:17:39,516
And at a fraction of the cost.
262
00:17:39,558 --> 00:17:42,686
- How long have you got?
- 24 hours.
263
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:46,129
Not me you need, Mrs. Russell,
it's the Magic Circle - all of them.
264
00:17:47,132 --> 00:17:49,794
- Not a chance.
- There are other things.
265
00:17:49,835 --> 00:17:52,963
With respect,
there's the Van Der Elst in the hall.
266
00:17:53,005 --> 00:17:55,769
No, the spoons are mine.
The other things aren't.
267
00:18:01,447 --> 00:18:03,813
How much cash do you need?
268
00:18:03,849 --> 00:18:05,840
Several thousand.
269
00:18:07,186 --> 00:18:11,316
And you really can't talk to your husband
about any of this?
270
00:18:11,356 --> 00:18:14,018
You can talk to me about it.
271
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:17,151
Will you talk to Jane?
272
00:18:21,166 --> 00:18:24,431
Thank you, James.
We won't be needing you again today.
273
00:18:24,470 --> 00:18:27,098
- Thanks, fella.
- Thanks, Greg.
274
00:18:27,139 --> 00:18:29,130
Nice doing business with you.
275
00:18:29,174 --> 00:18:31,165
(Tinker sings)
276
00:18:40,052 --> 00:18:41,383
Aha!
277
00:18:42,221 --> 00:18:44,883
- Who is he?
- What?
278
00:18:44,923 --> 00:18:46,914
The other man.
279
00:18:47,593 --> 00:18:50,960
- How did you know?
- Oh, Janey, please.
280
00:18:50,996 --> 00:18:54,625
Lovejoy, she and Ray are devoted.
They're been married for 17 years.
281
00:18:54,666 --> 00:18:57,726
- They've got all this together...
- Janey, get to the point.
282
00:18:57,769 --> 00:18:59,930
An indiscretion.
283
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:03,203
- Well, of course. Go on.
- With a crook.
284
00:19:03,242 --> 00:19:05,403
Prison record.
285
00:19:05,444 --> 00:19:07,776
And now, he's been killed.
286
00:19:11,116 --> 00:19:13,107
Is she a suspect?
287
00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:15,882
Two policemen from the Met
have offered to help.
288
00:19:19,358 --> 00:19:21,383
How?
289
00:19:21,426 --> 00:19:25,522
By omitting her name from enquiries
for a large consideration.
290
00:19:29,701 --> 00:19:31,692
Janey...
291
00:19:31,737 --> 00:19:34,934
this stinks.
I don't believe a word of this.
292
00:19:35,807 --> 00:19:40,244
Lovejoy, Alex and I have known them
for years. Mary's such a sweet woman.
293
00:19:40,279 --> 00:19:44,306
I'm sure she is, but just because a friend
of yours committed an indiscretion...
294
00:19:44,349 --> 00:19:45,680
Yes?
295
00:19:46,952 --> 00:19:49,921
- It's nothing to do with me.
- Well...
296
00:19:49,955 --> 00:19:52,446
- I said we'd help.
- We?
297
00:19:53,926 --> 00:19:55,257
You.
298
00:20:00,265 --> 00:20:02,256
Thank you, Jane.
299
00:20:08,273 --> 00:20:10,264
It's a vase.
300
00:20:10,309 --> 00:20:12,004
Rare?
301
00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:14,604
Yeah, it's as rare as
rocking-horse droppings.
302
00:20:15,881 --> 00:20:18,975
Argy-Rousseau. Cost me 11,000.
303
00:20:19,017 --> 00:20:21,349
That's 22 Australian.
304
00:20:21,386 --> 00:20:23,718
It's a beaut.
305
00:20:23,755 --> 00:20:26,383
No, I just want to know
if I need an export license.
306
00:20:27,993 --> 00:20:30,962
Were you going to put them on the policy?
307
00:20:30,996 --> 00:20:33,988
Hang on, just a minute.
Can you go a bit further down here?
308
00:20:34,766 --> 00:20:38,702
I'll keep it in the safe
and you talk to the airline about shipping.
309
00:20:38,737 --> 00:20:42,764
You got trouble, right here in River City
with a capital "T" and that rhymes with "P"
310
00:20:42,808 --> 00:20:45,936
and that stands for..."police."
311
00:20:45,978 --> 00:20:48,003
I'm too young to go to prison, Lovejoy.
312
00:20:48,046 --> 00:20:50,037
And I'm too old.
313
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:53,415
Tinker, where's your sense of adventure?
314
00:20:53,452 --> 00:20:55,818
I left it behind in the NAAFI in 1953.
315
00:20:57,990 --> 00:21:01,323
Lady Jane will be very upset about this.
316
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:04,227
- Is she in on it?
- Her and Mary Russell, like that.
317
00:21:05,163 --> 00:21:07,961
- Well, you never said.
- Didn't think I had to.
318
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:11,800
Anyway, Jane and I told Mary to stall them,
tell them she needed more time.
319
00:21:11,837 --> 00:21:13,896
They were going to call today, you see.
320
00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:17,306
We were going to set up a meeting
and we were going to be there.
321
00:21:17,342 --> 00:21:19,003
- We?
- We.
322
00:21:19,044 --> 00:21:21,774
To do what?
323
00:21:21,813 --> 00:21:23,144
Surveillance.
324
00:21:23,181 --> 00:21:26,412
Eric is our security expert after all, Tink.
325
00:21:26,451 --> 00:21:29,318
- But he didn't finish the course, Lovejoy.
- (Eric) Nearly!
326
00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:32,951
- You want to bug the meeting, right?
- Oh, my God.
327
00:21:32,991 --> 00:21:38,054
Well, it's easy-peasy, because I can get
one of these electronic briefcases, right?
328
00:21:38,096 --> 00:21:40,564
You open it up,
there's a microphone inside...
329
00:21:40,599 --> 00:21:42,226
- Get one!
- Wilco.
330
00:21:42,267 --> 00:21:45,100
And after the meet... we tail 'em.
331
00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:46,468
Oh, my God.
332
00:21:46,505 --> 00:21:49,531
- I'm on the Harley, right?
- I'm in Miriam.
333
00:21:49,574 --> 00:21:52,065
- Tink, that butcher's van.
- Oh, my God!
334
00:21:52,110 --> 00:21:55,546
- Melgrave's. You remember.
- That's the one. See if you can get it.
335
00:21:55,580 --> 00:21:58,947
- Must I, Lovejoy?
- Well, why not?
336
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:01,111
The smell of animal blood makes me sick.
337
00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:03,144
Oh, my God.
338
00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:12,092
This was designed by Archibald Knox.
339
00:22:14,066 --> 00:22:16,899
- The Celtic tracery is beautiful.
- (Greg) Seen many like it?
340
00:22:16,935 --> 00:22:18,926
Oh, it's very rare.
341
00:22:18,970 --> 00:22:23,031
Uh, Sir Max,
what did we decide about the Pugin?
342
00:22:23,075 --> 00:22:25,305
Twenty-five thousand.
343
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:28,404
- Twenty, wasn't it?
- No, twenty-five.
344
00:22:28,447 --> 00:22:30,438
Twenty.
345
00:22:33,151 --> 00:22:35,142
Enameled cabochon.
346
00:22:36,588 --> 00:22:38,453
- What do you think, Greg?
- I like it.
347
00:22:38,490 --> 00:22:40,549
- Three.
- I'd have thought two.
348
00:22:40,592 --> 00:22:43,083
- Three.
- Uh, Greg, a word.
349
00:22:45,397 --> 00:22:47,922
- I make the deals, you sign the checks.
- If you say so.
350
00:22:47,966 --> 00:22:49,957
That's the way it works.
351
00:22:50,736 --> 00:22:54,172
- Two grand, top whack.
- Oh, I'm not so sure.
352
00:22:54,206 --> 00:22:56,538
All right, then.
353
00:22:57,275 --> 00:22:59,266
Oh, don't be too hasty.
354
00:23:01,780 --> 00:23:03,771
I can live with two.
355
00:23:08,019 --> 00:23:10,010
(Clock chimes)
356
00:23:13,392 --> 00:23:14,620
Oh, Greg.
357
00:23:14,659 --> 00:23:16,820
Excuse me.
358
00:23:16,862 --> 00:23:18,193
Burne-Jones.
359
00:23:19,431 --> 00:23:22,491
- What is it, young fellow?
- You can ask Sir Max.
360
00:23:22,534 --> 00:23:25,332
Um, do you have a toilet I can use?
361
00:23:25,370 --> 00:23:27,395
Yes. Straight out and first turn left.
362
00:23:31,143 --> 00:23:33,577
- What do you think, Greg?
- That's terrific.
363
00:23:33,612 --> 00:23:36,274
That'll look great over Viv's desk.
364
00:23:41,753 --> 00:23:43,482
(Whispers) Eureka.
365
00:23:43,522 --> 00:23:45,513
You beaut.
366
00:23:48,093 --> 00:23:52,120
No point hanging your noses
over that, boys. Not for sale.
367
00:23:53,765 --> 00:23:56,029
- What is it?
- Tell him, Lovejoy.
368
00:23:57,068 --> 00:23:59,002
It's a Benin bronze.
369
00:23:59,037 --> 00:24:02,700
The only other place you'll see one
is the Berggruen collection.
370
00:24:02,741 --> 00:24:06,609
It's a head for a king's altar.
"Oba" they call them.
371
00:24:07,813 --> 00:24:12,113
You know, Benin City
was sacked by the Brits in 1897.
372
00:24:13,185 --> 00:24:15,517
Oh, they still make them, but not like this.
373
00:24:15,554 --> 00:24:19,081
- Where's Benin?
- Bendel State in Nigeria.
374
00:24:20,258 --> 00:24:22,453
Must be worth a power of money.
375
00:24:22,494 --> 00:24:25,554
- Oh, it's worth a million.
- Why won't you sell it, then?
376
00:24:25,597 --> 00:24:29,761
Well, I would tomorrow, but the Department
of Trade vetoed an export license.
377
00:24:29,801 --> 00:24:31,860
I can't apply again for seven years.
378
00:24:32,604 --> 00:24:34,799
The Waverly Criteria.
379
00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:37,274
- What's that?
- Red tape.
380
00:24:37,309 --> 00:24:42,337
Can't flog things of national
and cultural interest, blah, blah.
381
00:24:42,380 --> 00:24:47,010
And knowing that, domestic buyers
think they have me over a barrel.
382
00:24:47,686 --> 00:24:49,313
Sod 'em!
383
00:24:53,525 --> 00:24:56,926
- It's stunning.
- Yes, it is, indeed.
384
00:24:56,962 --> 00:24:59,396
Well, come on, Lulu.
385
00:24:59,431 --> 00:25:02,332
"Do not go gentle into that good night
386
00:25:02,367 --> 00:25:05,200
"Rage, rage against the dying of the light"
387
00:25:05,237 --> 00:25:07,228
- Lovejoy?
- Hm?
388
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:09,867
Eureka!
389
00:25:10,876 --> 00:25:13,572
Greg, you heard him.
390
00:25:16,014 --> 00:25:18,073
Lovejoy...
391
00:25:18,116 --> 00:25:19,606
I want it.
392
00:25:21,887 --> 00:25:23,878
(Phone)
393
00:25:27,759 --> 00:25:29,750
60590.
394
00:25:31,096 --> 00:25:33,087
Yes, Inspector.
395
00:25:34,266 --> 00:25:37,360
Um, not here.
I have the decorators in.
396
00:25:38,737 --> 00:25:41,228
The Green Man.
397
00:25:41,273 --> 00:25:43,605
No, but I'll find it.
398
00:25:43,642 --> 00:25:45,337
Two o'clock.
399
00:25:45,377 --> 00:25:48,039
Yes. Yes, I'll see you there.
400
00:25:48,947 --> 00:25:50,278
Goodbye.
401
00:25:50,982 --> 00:25:54,008
- Well done!
- I feel sick.
402
00:25:54,052 --> 00:25:56,043
Leave it to Lovejoy. He'll sort it out.
403
00:25:57,322 --> 00:25:59,347
(Sighs)
404
00:25:59,391 --> 00:26:01,882
Yes, it's terrible, it's terrible, terrible.
405
00:26:14,673 --> 00:26:16,664
(Phone)
406
00:26:21,813 --> 00:26:23,144
Veitch.
407
00:26:25,417 --> 00:26:26,816
Sir Max.
408
00:26:27,953 --> 00:26:30,251
I was just thinking about you.
409
00:26:30,288 --> 00:26:33,382
Cymbidium Rievaulx Hamsey.
410
00:26:33,425 --> 00:26:35,723
It's beautiful, isn't it?
411
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:38,593
It's not a rare orchid, as orchids go,
412
00:26:38,630 --> 00:26:43,124
but it's a terrible blighter to grow.
413
00:26:43,168 --> 00:26:45,898
The Benin bronze.
You wanted to talk about it.
414
00:26:45,937 --> 00:26:50,237
Oh, very direct, Anzacs. Always noticed.
415
00:26:50,275 --> 00:26:53,335
I've been thinking.
416
00:26:53,378 --> 00:26:55,369
And chewing it over.
417
00:26:58,183 --> 00:27:00,413
Metal. I'd rather buy plastics.
418
00:27:01,820 --> 00:27:05,119
There might, just might,
419
00:27:05,156 --> 00:27:08,956
be a way round our problem.
420
00:27:08,994 --> 00:27:11,292
Our problem? I approve.
421
00:27:11,329 --> 00:27:14,787
We needn't bring Lovejoy into it, need we?
422
00:27:14,833 --> 00:27:17,734
- No, I see no reason.
- Well, you know what they say,
423
00:27:17,769 --> 00:27:20,397
- a commission saved is a...
- Is a commission saved,
424
00:27:20,438 --> 00:27:23,100
split two ways -
your way, my way.
425
00:27:23,141 --> 00:27:25,632
The trouble is that it's...
426
00:27:26,544 --> 00:27:29,604
It involves a slight...
427
00:27:29,648 --> 00:27:31,878
How shall I put it?
428
00:27:31,916 --> 00:27:36,114
A slight bending of the law.
429
00:27:36,154 --> 00:27:39,123
Well, what are laws for, Sir Max...
430
00:27:39,157 --> 00:27:41,455
if not to be bent?
431
00:28:21,332 --> 00:28:23,926
(Farmer) Friesians, Hereford...
432
00:28:23,968 --> 00:28:25,299
Oh!
433
00:28:28,807 --> 00:28:30,798
(Indistinct conversation)
434
00:28:42,353 --> 00:28:44,344
Thank you.
435
00:28:44,856 --> 00:28:48,622
The same principle as the Trojan horse.
436
00:28:48,660 --> 00:28:52,391
- I don't understand.
- Well, hide it inside something else.
437
00:28:52,430 --> 00:28:55,126
Oh, I see! Right, right.
438
00:28:55,166 --> 00:28:57,134
Is this legal?
439
00:28:57,168 --> 00:28:59,102
Er, well...
440
00:28:59,137 --> 00:29:01,105
not entirely, no.
441
00:29:01,139 --> 00:29:05,508
The damn Department of Trade,
they won't grant me an export license.
442
00:29:05,543 --> 00:29:08,535
Dreary farts.
Can't appeal again till '99!
443
00:29:08,580 --> 00:29:11,208
- I shall be dead by then.
- It is yours, aye?
444
00:29:11,249 --> 00:29:13,911
Of course it's mine!
445
00:29:13,952 --> 00:29:16,682
That has been in the Spence family
since the 1890s.
446
00:29:16,721 --> 00:29:18,780
The question is, can you do it?
447
00:29:18,823 --> 00:29:22,190
Oh, aye, I could.
Just no' sure that I should.
448
00:29:26,498 --> 00:29:28,489
How much?
449
00:29:29,734 --> 00:29:31,725
- For all three?
- Yeah, the lot.
450
00:29:32,837 --> 00:29:35,169
Um, two grand?
451
00:29:35,206 --> 00:29:37,538
Four. I'll give you four.
452
00:29:37,575 --> 00:29:40,009
That help make your mind up?
453
00:29:56,027 --> 00:29:59,690
You got a good look at Shand
and the car, right, Tink?
454
00:29:59,731 --> 00:30:00,823
Tink?
455
00:30:00,865 --> 00:30:04,323
- I'm not a baby.
- Oh, you look terrible.
456
00:30:04,369 --> 00:30:06,633
I'm not well.
457
00:30:18,316 --> 00:30:20,307
Hi. Sit down.
458
00:30:23,788 --> 00:30:26,484
- Would you like something to drink?
- No.
459
00:30:26,524 --> 00:30:28,321
No, thank you.
460
00:30:30,295 --> 00:30:32,889
So where is it?
461
00:30:32,931 --> 00:30:34,922
I haven't got it.
462
00:30:34,966 --> 00:30:36,831
- What?
- I need more time.
463
00:30:36,868 --> 00:30:41,202
- I told you...
- You didn't give me long enough. Please.
464
00:30:41,272 --> 00:30:45,003
If you haven't got the money then
our report has to go in with the photos.
465
00:30:45,043 --> 00:30:48,570
Inspector, please.
Just another 24 hours.
466
00:30:48,613 --> 00:30:49,910
Nah.
467
00:30:49,948 --> 00:30:53,281
Listen, I'm selling some silver.
468
00:30:53,318 --> 00:30:55,946
I should have the money
by the end of today.
469
00:30:55,987 --> 00:30:59,650
That, plus some shares I'm selling.
Well, it'll be enough.
470
00:30:59,691 --> 00:31:02,319
What difference can one day make?
471
00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:03,486
Please!
472
00:31:05,263 --> 00:31:07,697
All right.
473
00:31:07,732 --> 00:31:10,997
- Thank you.
- I'll call. Same time tomorrow.
474
00:31:11,035 --> 00:31:12,935
Be ready.
475
00:31:12,971 --> 00:31:14,336
I promise.
476
00:31:42,433 --> 00:31:47,837
The thing is, gentlemen,
I can't fire another bronze round it.
477
00:31:47,872 --> 00:31:51,308
Why not?
Cos it might crack the original.
478
00:31:51,342 --> 00:31:52,969
(Sir Max) Good point.
479
00:31:53,011 --> 00:31:57,414
So... I'll have to model over it.
480
00:31:57,448 --> 00:31:58,881
Oh...
481
00:31:58,917 --> 00:32:00,578
Plaster!
482
00:32:00,618 --> 00:32:04,213
Yes, why not? That'll do fine.
483
00:32:04,255 --> 00:32:06,746
And then when that's dry,
484
00:32:06,791 --> 00:32:10,124
sculpt it, and then...
485
00:32:10,161 --> 00:32:12,391
special paint.
486
00:32:12,430 --> 00:32:14,955
How much? One, two...
487
00:32:14,999 --> 00:32:17,399
Aye, six coats.
488
00:32:17,435 --> 00:32:19,665
What for?
489
00:32:19,704 --> 00:32:21,934
- Why?
- To harden it up.
490
00:32:21,973 --> 00:32:25,966
Give it that coldness.
I mean, have you ever kissed bronze?
491
00:32:26,811 --> 00:32:29,371
Doesnae kiss you back, does it?
492
00:32:29,414 --> 00:32:32,349
That's right. Not a problem.
493
00:32:32,383 --> 00:32:34,146
- When can you start?
- Whenever.
494
00:32:34,185 --> 00:32:37,211
- Now.
- Do I no' get a cuppa tea first?
495
00:32:37,255 --> 00:32:38,586
Must you?
496
00:32:40,024 --> 00:32:42,015
Excuse me.
497
00:32:42,827 --> 00:32:45,125
Do you no' trust me?
498
00:32:45,163 --> 00:32:47,154
I trust everybody.
499
00:32:48,366 --> 00:32:49,697
Once.
500
00:33:36,547 --> 00:33:40,506
- So where are they?
- I had to pop off into a hedge.
501
00:33:40,551 --> 00:33:42,542
You're cracking up, Tink.
502
00:33:50,294 --> 00:33:52,728
- Hi, John.
- Afternoon, ma'am.
503
00:34:05,676 --> 00:34:08,770
- Thank God that's over.
- Oh, darling, how was it?
504
00:34:08,813 --> 00:34:10,075
Awful.
505
00:34:10,114 --> 00:34:13,106
- Did anything go wrong?
- Not that I know of.
506
00:34:14,252 --> 00:34:17,050
I just feel so...
507
00:34:17,088 --> 00:34:19,318
so soiled...
508
00:34:19,357 --> 00:34:22,053
having to crawl to him.
509
00:34:59,230 --> 00:35:01,755
Oh, don't tell me.
510
00:35:01,799 --> 00:35:04,791
The smell of blood!
511
00:35:04,836 --> 00:35:07,862
I've got some Scotch in the office.
512
00:35:07,905 --> 00:35:09,167
Scotch!
513
00:35:15,513 --> 00:35:19,643
- Eric's tape.
- Tape we hear on the way to the Tower.
514
00:35:22,286 --> 00:35:24,754
(Eric) Surveillance at the Green Man pub.
515
00:35:24,789 --> 00:35:30,159
Field agent E Catchpole.
1400 hours, 17th of the seventh.
516
00:35:30,194 --> 00:35:34,324
(Farmer #1)
Seen some of them horses at Hunsdon Mead?
517
00:35:34,365 --> 00:35:37,493
(Farmer #2)
Average eat last year was 77 kilos.
518
00:35:37,535 --> 00:35:40,527
(Farmer #1) Those Frenchman, though,
they made over an hundred.
519
00:35:40,571 --> 00:35:43,062
(Farmer #2) Your frog always were
an hungry bugger.
520
00:35:43,107 --> 00:35:45,234
(Farmer #1) Famous for it.
521
00:35:45,276 --> 00:35:47,710
Your froggie always was
an hungry bugger!
522
00:35:47,745 --> 00:35:49,372
I don't like it much...
523
00:35:49,413 --> 00:35:51,677
Marvelous!
524
00:35:56,954 --> 00:35:58,546
Marvelous.
525
00:35:58,589 --> 00:36:03,151
There I am out risking life and limb
and here you are having a laugh.
526
00:36:03,194 --> 00:36:05,628
- How did it go?
- Have I got news for you.
527
00:36:05,663 --> 00:36:09,030
Where did he take you,
you hungry bugger?
528
00:36:09,066 --> 00:36:11,227
(Imitates farmer)
Him too fat, he be...
529
00:36:12,370 --> 00:36:16,101
To a council estate
on the outskirts of Ipswich.
530
00:36:16,140 --> 00:36:18,404
I thought he was in the Met.
531
00:36:18,442 --> 00:36:21,934
No, that's what he told Mary Russell.
532
00:36:21,979 --> 00:36:24,914
Wasn't really a policeman at all,
was he, Eric?
533
00:36:24,949 --> 00:36:28,077
- Well, how do you know?
- Instinct. Gut reaction.
534
00:36:28,119 --> 00:36:30,178
Well, he used to be in the job.
535
00:36:30,221 --> 00:36:35,249
Used to be a DI, didn't he? But he got
thrown out over three years ago.
536
00:36:35,293 --> 00:36:37,386
How did you find that out?
537
00:36:37,428 --> 00:36:42,263
Well, I don't suppose you ever were
a paperboy, were you, Lady Jane?
538
00:36:42,300 --> 00:36:44,234
As a matter of fact, no, I wasn't.
539
00:36:44,268 --> 00:36:46,566
Well, if you ever want to find anything out,
540
00:36:46,604 --> 00:36:50,131
go to the local newsagents.
They're like the Ministry of Information.
541
00:36:50,174 --> 00:36:53,632
- Very good, Eric.
- Mind you, I had to dig deep.
542
00:36:53,678 --> 00:36:56,670
- How deep?
- Well, an ice-cream cornet,
543
00:36:56,714 --> 00:37:01,014
quarter of jelly beans,
fizzy pop and a comic.
544
00:37:01,052 --> 00:37:03,043
For a nipper.
545
00:37:53,070 --> 00:37:55,265
No, gentlemen.
546
00:37:55,306 --> 00:37:57,297
This way, please.
547
00:38:02,580 --> 00:38:05,344
- Good afternoon. What a lovely day.
- Who the hell are you?
548
00:38:05,383 --> 00:38:08,477
- Lovejoy. Who the hell are you?
- Er, what is all this?
549
00:38:08,519 --> 00:38:09,850
Ah, Shand.
550
00:38:09,887 --> 00:38:16,622
I have here some lovely piccies
of you and Mrs. Russell at the Green Man.
551
00:38:16,661 --> 00:38:21,064
They're all of you and Mrs. Russell at the
Green Man. Plus some background music.
552
00:38:21,098 --> 00:38:23,464
- I need more time.
- I told you...
553
00:38:23,501 --> 00:38:25,492
You didn't give me long enough.
554
00:38:27,171 --> 00:38:28,934
Please.
555
00:38:28,973 --> 00:38:33,205
Well, if you haven't got the money then
our report has to go in with the photos.
556
00:38:33,244 --> 00:38:35,644
Enough of that.
557
00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:38,808
"After a protracted illness,
Detective Inspector Michael Shand
558
00:38:38,849 --> 00:38:41,579
"was declared
permanently unfit for police work.
559
00:38:41,619 --> 00:38:44,087
"He will retire on December 23rd, 1988."
560
00:38:44,121 --> 00:38:48,148
"Detective Inspector Shand was suspended
from police duty in 1987."
561
00:38:49,026 --> 00:38:51,620
So what do you want?
562
00:38:53,964 --> 00:38:57,730
What's the penalty these days
for impersonating a police officer?
563
00:39:00,304 --> 00:39:02,829
All right, Lovejoy,
you want to make a deal?
564
00:39:04,008 --> 00:39:06,306
My piccies for your piccies?
565
00:39:07,945 --> 00:39:08,934
Yeah.
566
00:39:08,979 --> 00:39:12,881
And you never bother Mrs. Russell
or her husband again.
567
00:39:24,528 --> 00:39:26,223
Shut it.
568
00:39:26,263 --> 00:39:28,254
Shand? Tape.
569
00:39:32,570 --> 00:39:34,970
Wait till they play the rest of it.
570
00:39:35,005 --> 00:39:38,532
Abracadabra!
571
00:39:41,178 --> 00:39:42,577
Fantastic.
572
00:39:42,613 --> 00:39:44,604
Cold, huh?
573
00:39:44,648 --> 00:39:46,639
- All right to lift?
- Of course.
574
00:39:49,620 --> 00:39:52,214
It doesn't often happen.
I'm speechless.
575
00:39:56,627 --> 00:39:58,185
Lovejoy? Greg Veitch.
576
00:39:58,229 --> 00:40:02,563
This is farewell and goodbye.
I had to go back sooner than expected.
577
00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:06,627
Sorry we didn't crack the eureka.
Leaves something for next time, eh?
578
00:40:06,670 --> 00:40:11,801
Thanks to you and the boys for your help.
You should've got the check by now.
579
00:40:11,842 --> 00:40:14,470
As they say,
your blood's worth bottling, sport.
580
00:40:14,512 --> 00:40:16,673
If you get to Sydney, first shout's on me.
581
00:40:18,149 --> 00:40:21,585
Give us a thought when
you next get your leg over Lady Jane.
582
00:40:21,619 --> 00:40:23,610
- Lovejoy!
- What?
583
00:41:11,202 --> 00:41:13,193
(Squeaks)
584
00:41:43,567 --> 00:41:47,867
Charlene, get me on
the first flight out of Nelson.
585
00:41:47,905 --> 00:41:51,602
And listen, have Torchy Jacobson
call me from England, will you?
586
00:42:00,985 --> 00:42:03,112
Ah. Jameson?
587
00:42:03,153 --> 00:42:05,280
Sir Max.
588
00:42:05,322 --> 00:42:08,655
How about a couple more bronzes,
dear boy?
589
00:42:12,496 --> 00:42:15,090
(Greg) Count the hours, Lovejoy.
590
00:42:15,132 --> 00:42:17,123
What am I talking about?
591
00:42:17,167 --> 00:42:21,160
I'm talking about a Benin bronze.
I'm talking about $600,000 Australian.
592
00:42:21,205 --> 00:42:24,368
I'm talking about Sir Max Spence
and Jameson and you!
593
00:42:25,943 --> 00:42:28,844
Because you are the bastard
who introduced me to them!
594
00:42:31,115 --> 00:42:34,141
The Mafia have a saying, Lovejoy.
595
00:42:34,184 --> 00:42:37,449
"Never hate your enemy,
it affects your judgment."
596
00:42:37,488 --> 00:42:39,820
But I'm finding that very hard.
597
00:42:53,704 --> 00:42:55,695
(Knocking)
598
00:43:16,660 --> 00:43:18,651
He's not here!
599
00:43:18,696 --> 00:43:22,598
He must've had a call from Sydney as well
and decided to go away for the summer.
600
00:43:22,633 --> 00:43:24,863
Lovejoy, about those few days' holiday
you owe me.
601
00:43:24,902 --> 00:43:27,769
Come on! We're going to see Jameson.
602
00:43:27,805 --> 00:43:29,796
- OK, Eric?
- Heeey!
603
00:43:46,323 --> 00:43:48,314
(Police radio)
604
00:43:56,967 --> 00:44:01,427
Arson. They reckon the whole place
reeked of kerosene when they got here.
605
00:44:01,472 --> 00:44:03,963
- What about Jameson?
- No sign of him.
606
00:44:04,008 --> 00:44:05,999
(Phone)
607
00:44:09,346 --> 00:44:12,213
Personally, I'd sooner be dead
when I'm cremated.
608
00:44:14,018 --> 00:44:16,009
Lovejoy?
609
00:44:19,690 --> 00:44:21,590
Hello, Lovejoy?
610
00:44:21,625 --> 00:44:24,025
Want to know what happened
to Jameson's studio?
611
00:44:24,061 --> 00:44:26,689
I said frighten him and
they thought I said "fry him."
612
00:44:26,730 --> 00:44:29,858
Tell Sir Max that's what happens
to drongos who cross me.
613
00:44:29,900 --> 00:44:31,891
You're next, Lovejoy.
614
00:44:33,237 --> 00:44:34,568
Janey.
615
00:45:03,834 --> 00:45:05,768
Max!
616
00:45:09,473 --> 00:45:11,065
Max!
617
00:45:11,108 --> 00:45:13,099
Oh, Lovejoy.
618
00:45:14,812 --> 00:45:16,803
Ah, Max!
619
00:45:21,585 --> 00:45:23,576
Is anything wrong?
620
00:45:24,621 --> 00:45:27,613
- The Benin bronze.
- What?
621
00:45:27,658 --> 00:45:31,389
- What happened to it?
- I've no idea what you're talking about.
622
00:45:31,428 --> 00:45:33,760
Sir Max, please.
623
00:45:33,797 --> 00:45:37,198
You made a deal with Jameson,
didn't you?
624
00:45:37,234 --> 00:45:41,170
- Fantasy, Lovejoy.
- Someone set fire to his studio.
625
00:45:42,272 --> 00:45:44,331
- Who?
- Greg Veitch.
626
00:45:44,374 --> 00:45:47,810
- He's gone.
- No, he's back, and...
627
00:45:47,845 --> 00:45:49,005
Excuse me, Jane.
628
00:45:49,046 --> 00:45:51,310
...wants your balls on a fork.
629
00:45:51,348 --> 00:45:53,976
Oh, my goodness.
630
00:45:54,017 --> 00:45:56,008
What did you do with the money?
631
00:45:59,757 --> 00:46:02,021
- I spent it.
- All of it?
632
00:46:02,059 --> 00:46:03,617
- All.
- What on?
633
00:46:03,660 --> 00:46:06,720
I sent it straight to the Inland Revenue.
Death duties.
634
00:46:06,764 --> 00:46:09,062
That's great, Max.
What about the bronze?
635
00:46:09,099 --> 00:46:14,298
- In Jameson's studio.
- There is no Jameson's studio.
636
00:46:14,338 --> 00:46:16,329
What was it doing there anyway?
637
00:46:18,876 --> 00:46:20,776
Come on, Max.
638
00:46:20,811 --> 00:46:22,802
Tell us.
639
00:46:26,683 --> 00:46:28,173
I sold it.
640
00:46:28,218 --> 00:46:29,879
Again?
641
00:46:29,920 --> 00:46:32,081
To a Chinese gentleman.
642
00:46:33,157 --> 00:46:35,523
And a Russian.
643
00:46:35,559 --> 00:46:38,221
And to an awfully charming Nigerian.
644
00:46:56,547 --> 00:46:58,845
(Eric) What have you found?
645
00:46:58,882 --> 00:47:01,316
- I'm not sure.
- Could it be?
646
00:47:01,351 --> 00:47:03,615
Looks kinda like it, eh?
647
00:47:04,922 --> 00:47:06,913
Million quid's worth?
648
00:47:09,359 --> 00:47:11,350
(Eric) Are you sure, Lovejoy?
649
00:47:11,395 --> 00:47:16,059
I mean, are you sure you haven't just
cooked this up? It was just a thought.
650
00:47:16,099 --> 00:47:19,865
I have an auntie in Lyme Regis
pining for a visit.
651
00:47:26,443 --> 00:47:28,536
Your chair, Lovejoy.
652
00:47:28,579 --> 00:47:30,570
It's like a fairy on a Christmas tree.
653
00:47:42,226 --> 00:47:45,855
What's that smell?
I've smelt it before, recently.
654
00:47:47,664 --> 00:47:48,995
Kerosene.
655
00:47:50,100 --> 00:47:52,466
Oh, my God.
656
00:47:52,502 --> 00:47:57,303
I mean, what are we going to do? How are
we going to get this bloke off our backs?
657
00:47:57,341 --> 00:48:01,004
"If you can keep your head
whilst all about you are losing theirs..."
658
00:48:02,613 --> 00:48:03,910
Yeah?
659
00:48:03,947 --> 00:48:05,938
- I've forgotten the rest.
- Oh!
660
00:48:14,892 --> 00:48:16,223
Shand.
661
00:48:17,060 --> 00:48:19,051
(Knocking)
662
00:48:26,270 --> 00:48:28,636
- Mr. Veitch?
- Yeah.
663
00:48:28,672 --> 00:48:33,439
We're police officers, sir. I'm Detective Inspector
Shand. This is Detective Sergeant Redston.
664
00:48:33,477 --> 00:48:36,844
We're making some enquiries, sir, about a fire.
665
00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:40,281
A suspected arson attack
at a local sculptor's foundry.
666
00:48:53,363 --> 00:48:56,230
- You look well for a dead 'un, Jerry.
- What do you want?
667
00:48:56,266 --> 00:48:59,861
What do you think I want?
Half of what Veitch gave you.
668
00:48:59,903 --> 00:49:04,272
And this will be the final farewell
performance, won't it, Inspector?
669
00:49:05,008 --> 00:49:06,805
Ahem.
670
00:49:09,012 --> 00:49:11,003
Plus the negs.
671
00:49:13,850 --> 00:49:15,841
- Ta.
- Er, Lovejoy.
672
00:49:16,586 --> 00:49:19,077
Your negs.
I'll give your love to Mary Russell.
673
00:49:28,699 --> 00:49:31,600
Still thinking of popping down
to Lyme Regis, Tink?
674
00:49:31,635 --> 00:49:35,765
Oh, there's no great rush.
She can wait till summer goes.
675
00:49:35,806 --> 00:49:37,797
And those days off, Eric?
676
00:49:37,841 --> 00:49:41,242
I don't think so. There's too much
to do around here, isn't there?
677
00:49:41,278 --> 00:49:43,337
Oh, there's far too much, yeah.
678
00:49:44,281 --> 00:49:46,875
- Can I ask a question?
- Certainly.
679
00:49:46,917 --> 00:49:50,910
- As long as it has to do with black pepper.
- No, it certainly has not.
680
00:49:50,954 --> 00:49:53,286
Whatever happened to the Benin bronze?
681
00:49:53,323 --> 00:49:56,349
It melted in the Jameson fire.
682
00:49:56,393 --> 00:50:01,626
Yeah, it's probably stuck to the sole
of some fireman's size 12 boot.
683
00:50:01,665 --> 00:50:04,532
- What do you say, Lovejoy?
- Being an incurable romantic,
684
00:50:04,568 --> 00:50:08,299
I think it's like the Maltese Falcon.
We haven't heard the last of it yet.
685
00:50:08,338 --> 00:50:10,431
- What?
- You heard what Jameson said.
686
00:50:10,474 --> 00:50:12,874
But I'm a divvy,
I sense these things.
687
00:50:12,909 --> 00:50:15,503
Oh, put the kettle on, Lovejoy!
688
00:50:15,545 --> 00:50:16,534
Ha-ha!
689
00:50:16,584 --> 00:50:21,134
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