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1
00:00:02,116 --> 00:00:04,660
- Baby boy, I ampumped,
- Yeah, yeah.
2
00:00:04,100 --> 00:00:06,233
It's your first
night
on network TV.
3
00:00:06,266 --> 00:00:09,233
On NBC. Which stands
for "No Black
Comedy."
4
00:00:09,266 --> 00:00:11,233
[laughs]
5
00:00:12,383 --> 00:00:14,233
I've been meaning
to ask you, son.
6
00:00:14,266 --> 00:00:16,300
How did you get a part on
"Everybody Loves Everybody?"
7
00:00:16,333 --> 00:00:18,233
That's an all-white show.
8
00:00:18,266 --> 00:00:20,233
Well, the producers said
they're trying to attract
9
00:00:20,266 --> 00:00:23,383
an alternate urban demographic.
10
00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:25,383
Just say black people.
11
00:00:27,830 --> 00:00:29,100
- This is a party, right?
- 'Yeah.'
12
00:00:29,133 --> 00:00:31,133
Where are the hor dervers?
13
00:00:33,266 --> 00:00:34,283
The what?
14
00:00:34,316 --> 00:00:37,000
The hoe derbes!
15
00:00:38,133 --> 00:00:39,133
It'shor d'oeuvres,
16
00:00:39,166 --> 00:00:41,100
Who taught you
how to speak? Magic?
17
00:00:41,133 --> 00:00:42,233
[laughing]
18
00:00:44,383 --> 00:00:46,660
[laughing]
19
00:00:46,100 --> 00:00:47,183
Sorry, pops,
I ain't got no
money
20
00:00:47,216 --> 00:00:48,350
to buy no
hor d'oeuvres,
man.
21
00:00:48,383 --> 00:00:51,330
All my money is tied up
in rebuilding the
newsstand.
22
00:00:51,660 --> 00:00:52,183
[knocking on door]
23
00:00:52,216 --> 00:00:55,000
- Hey, everybody.
- 'Hey, Dee.'
24
00:00:55,330 --> 00:00:56,150
I bought some food.
25
00:00:56,183 --> 00:00:58,316
- Dee, Dee, Dee.
- Ooh, I'm exhausted.
26
00:00:58,350 --> 00:01:01,000
- Dee.
- Ooh.
27
00:01:01,330 --> 00:01:03,100
Carrots and celery?
Where's the damn meat?
28
00:01:04,133 --> 00:01:05,300
I am on a diet.
29
00:01:05,333 --> 00:01:08,250
I already lost three pounds.
30
00:01:08,283 --> 00:01:11,150
Did you look behind you?
31
00:01:11,183 --> 00:01:12,250
- Hey, hey, hey.
- You!
32
00:01:12,283 --> 00:01:14,660
- There's Marlon's show,
c'mon!
- Oh, okay.
33
00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:15,366
- Shh.
- Shh, shh, shh.
34
00:01:17,500 --> 00:01:19,500
Honey! We won the game.
35
00:01:19,830 --> 00:01:20,250
You guys buy lunch.
36
00:01:20,283 --> 00:01:22,660
Hey, we would've won.
37
00:01:22,100 --> 00:01:25,233
But you girls
had an unfair
advantage.
38
00:01:25,266 --> 00:01:27,366
Luther's in the hiz-house,
y'all!
39
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,233
[indistinct chattering]
40
00:01:32,266 --> 00:01:34,316
He must have scored
30 points alone.
41
00:01:35,366 --> 00:01:37,000
We helped.
42
00:01:37,330 --> 00:01:38,266
[scoffs]
43
00:01:38,300 --> 00:01:41,383
Yeah. The way
Dr. Kevorkian helps old
people.
44
00:01:45,283 --> 00:01:47,333
- You see that?
- 'Oh, hee hee hee.'
45
00:01:47,366 --> 00:01:49,116
I improvised. I made that up.
46
00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:50,316
That and the, "Huh huh huh."
47
00:01:50,350 --> 00:01:52,830
O-kay-y-y.
48
00:01:52,116 --> 00:01:53,830
- Choo!
- Yeah.
49
00:01:53,116 --> 00:01:55,250
Was that your only line?
50
00:01:55,283 --> 00:01:57,316
- Are those your real breasts?
- Uh.
51
00:01:59,133 --> 00:02:00,283
Of course not.
52
00:02:02,250 --> 00:02:05,830
So...you guys up
for another game next week?
53
00:02:05,116 --> 00:02:06,333
- Hmm.
- Okay.
54
00:02:06,366 --> 00:02:09,366
But we'll be shirts,
and you'll be skins.
55
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:12,250
I'll be trippi-i-in'!
56
00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,333
White people
laugh at anything.
57
00:02:18,366 --> 00:02:20,350
[theme song]
58
00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:23,216
♪ We're brothers ♪
59
00:02:23,250 --> 00:02:26,266
♪ We're happy and we're
singin'
and we're colored ♪
60
00:02:28,116 --> 00:02:30,150
♪ Give me a high five ♪♪
61
00:02:30,183 --> 00:02:31,350
(male #1)
'Alright, cut and print.'
62
00:02:31,383 --> 00:02:34,660
'Beautiful, guys. Dynamite.'
63
00:02:34,100 --> 00:02:37,830
[theme music]
64
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,830
- Thank you.
- Hey.
65
00:03:02,116 --> 00:03:03,300
- You were good, baby boy.
- Thank you, thank you.
66
00:03:03,333 --> 00:03:05,233
Hey, you
breakin'
TV ground, man.
67
00:03:05,266 --> 00:03:07,183
You know, you're the
first
brother on that TV show
68
00:03:07,216 --> 00:03:08,366
that wasn't wearing a ski mask?
69
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:10,100
[laughs]
70
00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:11,266
Hey, pizza's ready.
71
00:03:11,300 --> 00:03:13,300
- Oh.
- Oh.
72
00:03:13,333 --> 00:03:15,500
Hey, Dee, you want a slice?
73
00:03:15,830 --> 00:03:17,216
Oh, no, thank you,
I'mma keep my
distance.
74
00:03:17,250 --> 00:03:19,100
I have willpower!
75
00:03:19,133 --> 00:03:20,183
Well, if that doesn't, Dee
76
00:03:20,216 --> 00:03:23,500
I'll chain your big ass
to that radiator.
77
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,266
Oh, man, you know what?
I gotta get out of here,
Marlon.
78
00:03:27,300 --> 00:03:30,000
I'm supposed to be taking
out
Jasmine to the movies.
79
00:03:30,330 --> 00:03:31,383
Do me a favor,
hook me up with $50.
80
00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:33,150
Fifty dollars?
81
00:03:33,183 --> 00:03:36,166
Come on, man, I'm payin'
for pizza, I'm payin' the
rent.
82
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:39,000
Next thing you know you want me
to pay for your sins.
83
00:03:40,366 --> 00:03:43,216
Alright, look.
84
00:03:43,250 --> 00:03:45,233
Here's two dollars.
85
00:03:46,216 --> 00:03:48,200
Go rent "Woo."
86
00:03:50,116 --> 00:03:51,333
Alright, here's another dollar.
87
00:03:51,366 --> 00:03:54,183
Get "Bout It, Bout It" too.
88
00:03:54,216 --> 00:03:55,283
Marlon, don't do this
to me, man.
89
00:03:55,316 --> 00:03:56,383
Come on,
I've been hooking you up
90
00:03:57,160 --> 00:03:58,350
for the past four years now.
91
00:03:58,383 --> 00:04:00,200
Alright. Here.
92
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:03,233
- Peace out.
- Okay.
93
00:04:03,266 --> 00:04:06,330
Hey. Yo, make sure
you clean that kitchen, man.
94
00:04:06,660 --> 00:04:07,366
And wash those dishes up
and take that garbage out.
95
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:11,160
That kitchen stinks, it
smells
like the WNBA's locker room.
96
00:04:14,166 --> 00:04:16,000
Ooh, that's funny.
97
00:04:16,330 --> 00:04:18,660
You payin' all the bills
and Shawn is still
98
00:04:18,100 --> 00:04:19,333
bossing you around.
99
00:04:19,366 --> 00:04:22,216
Dee, Shawn's always
ordering me around.
100
00:04:22,250 --> 00:04:23,300
This mornin'..
101
00:04:23,333 --> 00:04:25,350
...he even made me usesoap.
102
00:04:28,500 --> 00:04:30,500
Tryin' to get me all clean.
103
00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:32,100
Well..
104
00:04:32,133 --> 00:04:34,116
...it's none of my business..
105
00:04:34,150 --> 00:04:37,300
...you know, if don't mind
being treated like a little..
106
00:04:37,333 --> 00:04:39,166
...biatch!
107
00:04:39,200 --> 00:04:41,200
[instrumental music]
108
00:04:42,233 --> 00:04:46,283
Y'all be trippi-i-ing-ah!
109
00:04:46,316 --> 00:04:48,116
You are so obnoxious, man.
110
00:04:48,150 --> 00:04:50,350
You, uh, still
watchin' that tape?
111
00:04:50,383 --> 00:04:53,383
No, actually, I was just
sittin' here thinkin'.
112
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:55,830
Are you okay?
113
00:04:55,116 --> 00:04:56,166
You want an aspirin?
114
00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:59,330
[laughs
sarcastically]
I'm fine.
115
00:04:59,660 --> 00:05:00,350
Look here.
116
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:02,830
Sit down,
I gotta talk to you, man.
117
00:05:02,116 --> 00:05:03,216
- What?
- 'Somethin' seri..'
118
00:05:03,250 --> 00:05:04,333
Pl-please?
119
00:05:06,100 --> 00:05:07,166
Now, look, man.
120
00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:08,200
Since I'm the one making
121
00:05:08,233 --> 00:05:10,300
all the cheese up in here..
122
00:05:10,333 --> 00:05:12,250
...I think things
should be a little bit
different
123
00:05:12,283 --> 00:05:14,330
and there are
gonna be some changes.
124
00:05:14,660 --> 00:05:17,830
And I demand that you
listen
to what I gots to say!
125
00:05:19,330 --> 00:05:20,183
Please.
126
00:05:21,350 --> 00:05:23,250
Aight, well, you know,
I guess you should
127
00:05:23,283 --> 00:05:26,250
have some kind of say-so
in what goes on around here.
128
00:05:26,283 --> 00:05:27,266
What you got?
129
00:05:27,300 --> 00:05:29,000
First of all..
130
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:32,830
...it's too damn hot in here.
131
00:05:32,116 --> 00:05:35,283
Right now,
the temperature is 73 degrees.
132
00:05:35,316 --> 00:05:38,830
I want it to be71!
133
00:05:39,283 --> 00:05:41,100
Consider it done.
134
00:05:41,133 --> 00:05:43,200
Anything to stop you from
walkin' around here naked.
135
00:05:44,333 --> 00:05:46,660
- Goodnight.
- Wait, wait, wait, hold on.
136
00:05:46,100 --> 00:05:48,233
I got some more.
137
00:05:48,266 --> 00:05:49,366
Now, listen.
138
00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:53,660
When you bring
pretty girls up in
here..
139
00:05:53,100 --> 00:05:55,116
...I get to slop
'em
down first.
140
00:05:57,266 --> 00:06:00,830
Okay, I'll take sloppy seconds.
141
00:06:00,116 --> 00:06:03,330
Oh, can you keep the door
cracked so a brother can watch?
142
00:06:03,660 --> 00:06:05,200
[instrumental music]
143
00:06:05,233 --> 00:06:07,330
Ooh, Shawn.
144
00:06:07,660 --> 00:06:09,200
When is this gonna be done?
145
00:06:09,233 --> 00:06:11,250
Well, it was supposed
to be just a few days
146
00:06:11,283 --> 00:06:12,366
but now
the Village People's telling
me
147
00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:14,250
it's gonna be another week.
148
00:06:14,283 --> 00:06:17,500
Oh...you mean
I gotta stand up
here
149
00:06:17,830 --> 00:06:18,316
and look at these sweaty men
150
00:06:18,350 --> 00:06:22,366
with their butts hangin' outta
their jeans for seven more
days?
151
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,216
I'm afraid so.
152
00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:27,000
Alright.
153
00:06:27,330 --> 00:06:29,183
You know, I may not
be eatin' beef
154
00:06:29,216 --> 00:06:31,216
but I can look at it.
155
00:06:33,133 --> 00:06:35,266
Oh! Oh, I'm sorry.
156
00:06:35,300 --> 00:06:38,150
I'm sorry.
I just got a little dizzy.
157
00:06:38,183 --> 00:06:39,383
Oh-oh.
158
00:06:40,160 --> 00:06:42,166
- Oh, oh, I'm sorry.
- Hey, what's up, kid?
159
00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:44,183
- The place is looking good.
- Yeah, great, Marlon.
160
00:06:44,216 --> 00:06:46,100
Uh, you were supposed
to be here 20 minutes ago.
161
00:06:46,133 --> 00:06:48,330
And? So I'm late.
162
00:06:48,660 --> 00:06:50,300
You know, that happens
when you're the
breadwinner.
163
00:06:51,350 --> 00:06:53,316
- Yeah, great.
- Broke. Money.
164
00:06:53,350 --> 00:06:55,660
Yeah, that's funny.
165
00:06:55,100 --> 00:06:56,250
But I'm hungry, so let's go
eat.
Come on.
166
00:06:56,283 --> 00:06:59,000
Wait, hold on,
I ain't come down here to
eat.
167
00:06:59,330 --> 00:07:02,330
Ew. Trying to get a free meal.
168
00:07:02,660 --> 00:07:03,350
Look here, man,
I just came by
here
169
00:07:03,383 --> 00:07:06,283
to drop off this little
list of chores I got for
you.
170
00:07:06,316 --> 00:07:09,116
Boy, are you crazy?
I ain't doin' no chores.
171
00:07:09,150 --> 00:07:10,333
"Do the laundry. Cook dinner."
172
00:07:10,366 --> 00:07:14,660
And you're damn sure
I ain't gettin' no bikini wax.
173
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,233
Grandma said she wasn't
going to do it no more.
174
00:07:18,233 --> 00:07:19,266
Aight, look here.
175
00:07:19,300 --> 00:07:21,330
I'm payin' the bills, man.
176
00:07:21,660 --> 00:07:22,216
You listen to what I say now.
177
00:07:22,250 --> 00:07:24,316
You handle your
responsibilitie
s.
178
00:07:27,160 --> 00:07:29,150
Hey, yo, pop, man,
Marlon's outta control,
man.
179
00:07:29,183 --> 00:07:30,266
Well, yeah, son,
but like you say
180
00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,316
in a week,
you'll be straight.
181
00:07:34,366 --> 00:07:36,660
Hey, hey. Hey, yo.
182
00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:38,660
Hey, dude. Where you goin', man?
183
00:07:38,100 --> 00:07:40,200
We just got beeped, there's
an emergency on another job
184
00:07:40,233 --> 00:07:41,383
that pays a lot more money.
185
00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:44,160
Hey, ey, ey, I'm paying you
a lot of money too.
186
00:07:44,500 --> 00:07:46,500
See ya in a couple of months.
187
00:07:48,830 --> 00:07:49,150
Man.
188
00:07:49,183 --> 00:07:51,000
Pop, this is messed up, man.
189
00:07:51,330 --> 00:07:53,500
Yeah, I know
you're disappointed, son.
190
00:07:53,830 --> 00:07:54,366
But those months
will go by quickly.
191
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:56,116
I don't know, pop.
192
00:07:56,150 --> 00:07:57,266
With the newsstand
out of commission
193
00:07:57,300 --> 00:07:59,333
I don't have
any extra money comin' in.
194
00:07:59,366 --> 00:08:01,250
You know how crazy Marlon is.
195
00:08:01,283 --> 00:08:04,100
Shawn, Marlon
is a reasonable person.
196
00:08:04,133 --> 00:08:07,500
I know he won't
make a big deal out of this.
197
00:08:07,830 --> 00:08:08,316
Trust me.
198
00:08:10,166 --> 00:08:12,160
Here's the rest of your stuff.
199
00:08:12,500 --> 00:08:14,150
Uh, but I borrowed
a couple pair of p-panty
draws.
200
00:08:16,250 --> 00:08:17,316
Goodnight.
201
00:08:17,350 --> 00:08:19,266
Don't let the bedbugs bite.
202
00:08:19,300 --> 00:08:21,283
Ha ha ha, very funny.
203
00:08:21,316 --> 00:08:24,330
No, I'm dead serious. Here.
204
00:08:29,383 --> 00:08:30,350
Hey!
205
00:08:30,383 --> 00:08:32,150
[instrumental music]
206
00:08:35,133 --> 00:08:36,333
[instrumental music]
207
00:08:38,830 --> 00:08:40,100
Come on, Sleeping Beauty,
rise and shine
208
00:08:40,133 --> 00:08:42,250
and give God
your glory, glory.
209
00:08:45,133 --> 00:08:47,500
[whispering]
Shawn.
210
00:08:47,830 --> 00:08:48,383
You sleepin'?
211
00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:51,100
[shouting]
Well, wake up!
212
00:08:53,133 --> 00:08:55,233
[laughing]
213
00:08:56,366 --> 00:08:58,250
What the hell's
the matter with you, man?
214
00:08:58,283 --> 00:09:00,166
- Wake up. Look, look.
- Leave me alone!
215
00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:03,250
The early bird gets to put
his worm in two bushes.
216
00:09:04,350 --> 00:09:07,216
Hell, the early bird's
about to get plucked up.
217
00:09:08,233 --> 00:09:10,000
Oh, my, my.
218
00:09:10,330 --> 00:09:12,266
I see somebody
didn't sleep too well.
219
00:09:13,250 --> 00:09:14,333
No, I didn't.
220
00:09:14,366 --> 00:09:17,183
And your bed stinks.
221
00:09:17,216 --> 00:09:20,330
Smells like the seat
on Big Pun's tour bus.
222
00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:23,100
I gotta go to the bathroom, man.
223
00:09:23,133 --> 00:09:24,200
Oh, well, if you
goin' to the
bathroom
224
00:09:24,233 --> 00:09:26,216
you might need this.
225
00:09:28,150 --> 00:09:31,250
What am I gonna wipe with
this,
some eye boogers?
226
00:09:31,283 --> 00:09:34,266
Uh, that's your
rations
for the month.
227
00:09:34,300 --> 00:09:37,100
Hey. We just have
to tighten our
belts.
228
00:09:37,133 --> 00:09:39,660
I'm gonna have to tighten
more than my belt.
229
00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:41,830
Hey, hey,
hold all the
attitude.
230
00:09:41,116 --> 00:09:43,330
Look here, when you
payin' the bills
231
00:09:43,660 --> 00:09:44,300
you said I was
wastin' too much
money.
232
00:09:44,333 --> 00:09:46,000
Now look at you.
233
00:09:46,330 --> 00:09:48,283
All of a sudden
you wanna use
two-ply.
234
00:09:48,316 --> 00:09:50,383
What, you too good
for newspaper?
235
00:09:52,316 --> 00:09:56,000
Marlon, you don't get it,
I don't have any money to
waste.
236
00:09:56,330 --> 00:09:57,316
I can't even get
my clothes cleaned.
237
00:09:57,350 --> 00:09:59,333
Man, I got you,
don't worry about your
clothes.
238
00:09:59,366 --> 00:10:01,266
I got you hooked up,
you can wear some of my
stuff.
239
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:03,233
Come here. Boy,
we gonna hook you up.
240
00:10:03,266 --> 00:10:05,200
You gonna befly.
241
00:10:05,233 --> 00:10:08,283
One...put you
in this 8-ball
jacket.
242
00:10:09,366 --> 00:10:12,660
Here, put that on, come on.
243
00:10:12,100 --> 00:10:13,250
Go on, put that
on,
I know you want..
244
00:10:13,283 --> 00:10:16,500
You feel that
butter-soft leather?
Yeah.
245
00:10:16,830 --> 00:10:18,283
Yeah, look at you, boy!
Turn that collar up.
246
00:10:18,316 --> 00:10:20,660
Yeah!
247
00:10:20,100 --> 00:10:22,266
You stylin'!
248
00:10:22,300 --> 00:10:25,330
Put you in this
little
Golden Child hat.
249
00:10:29,250 --> 00:10:30,216
'Yeah.'
250
00:10:30,250 --> 00:10:34,160
♪ I-I-I I-I-I I want a knife ♪♪
251
00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:36,333
And here.
252
00:10:36,366 --> 00:10:38,660
Ah.
253
00:10:38,100 --> 00:10:40,250
Some Sasson jeans.
254
00:10:41,233 --> 00:10:44,333
Ooh la la.
255
00:10:44,366 --> 00:10:48,830
Marlon, you better get them
Garth Brooks jeans away from me.
256
00:10:48,116 --> 00:10:50,160
What, you don't like these?
257
00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:51,383
I got some Jordache in here.
258
00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:54,116
Sergio Valente's
two-tone, two-tone
knees?
259
00:10:54,150 --> 00:10:55,250
Uh-huh, are you having fun?
260
00:10:55,283 --> 00:10:57,233
You havin' fun
with your little game, huh?
261
00:10:57,266 --> 00:11:01,830
- I'm having a ball!
- Ha ha, crazy!
262
00:11:01,116 --> 00:11:03,166
- You look ridiculous!
- Ooh, you wild.
263
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:05,150
- You got jokes, huh?
- Yeah.
264
00:11:05,183 --> 00:11:07,216
You look like you just
fell outta "Beat Street."
265
00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:09,100
[laughs sarcastically]
266
00:11:09,133 --> 00:11:10,233
[knocking on door]
267
00:11:11,333 --> 00:11:13,383
- 'Not funny.'
- Hurrah! Ha ha ha.
268
00:11:16,250 --> 00:11:18,100
Hey, what's up, Jasmine?
269
00:11:18,133 --> 00:11:20,366
Baby, why do you look so...'80s?
270
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:22,366
[laughing]
271
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:24,300
'Cause me and Marlon,
w-we were doing a scene
272
00:11:24,333 --> 00:11:26,300
outta, outta the movie,
uh, "Breakin'."
273
00:11:26,333 --> 00:11:29,200
Yeah, I-I-I played,
uh, Boogaloo Shrimp.
274
00:11:31,330 --> 00:11:32,250
[laughing]
275
00:11:36,660 --> 00:11:38,300
Well, I hope you're not
taking me to brunch like
that.
276
00:11:38,333 --> 00:11:40,333
Brunch?
277
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:43,133
Oh, no, no, nah, nah, nah,
hang on one second.
278
00:11:45,100 --> 00:11:47,316
Marlon, I forgot, I was supposed
to be taking Jasmine to brunch.
279
00:11:47,350 --> 00:11:49,283
Do me a favor,
loan me some money
280
00:11:49,316 --> 00:11:52,250
and don't make me look bad.
281
00:11:52,283 --> 00:11:54,500
Mm-mm.
282
00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:58,150
Look here, man.
Hos ain't in the budget.
283
00:12:01,333 --> 00:12:04,316
Oh, Jasmine, girl. Oh, man!
284
00:12:04,350 --> 00:12:07,116
I completely forgot!
285
00:12:07,150 --> 00:12:09,316
I got a business meetin'.
286
00:12:09,350 --> 00:12:11,383
I, I can't take you
to brunch today.
287
00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:14,383
I.. Man, Ihate
when I do that, man!
288
00:12:17,283 --> 00:12:19,166
I hate when that happens.
I'm sorry.
289
00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:21,116
Baby, it's okay.
290
00:12:21,150 --> 00:12:23,250
I know
business before
pleasure.
291
00:12:23,283 --> 00:12:25,183
You handle your business today
292
00:12:25,216 --> 00:12:27,300
and I'll handle
my pleasure tomorrow.
293
00:12:38,330 --> 00:12:39,100
[laughs]
294
00:12:45,233 --> 00:12:47,333
You keep on kissin' me
like that, girl..
295
00:12:47,366 --> 00:12:49,383
...and I'mma
eat you up for brunch.
296
00:12:53,133 --> 00:12:54,216
Whoo.
297
00:12:54,250 --> 00:12:55,300
Mm, man.
298
00:12:55,333 --> 00:12:58,000
Tisha Campbell's
little sister is cute.
299
00:13:00,330 --> 00:13:01,330
How much longer
are you gonna throw
this
300
00:13:01,660 --> 00:13:02,660
up in my face, Marlon?
301
00:13:02,100 --> 00:13:03,216
As long as that face
302
00:13:03,250 --> 00:13:04,383
doesn't get off his lazy ass
303
00:13:05,160 --> 00:13:07,160
and get a G-O-B.
304
00:13:11,300 --> 00:13:13,200
You know what?
That's what I'm gonna do.
305
00:13:13,233 --> 00:13:14,333
That's what I'm gonna do,
I'mma go out there
306
00:13:14,366 --> 00:13:16,160
and I'mma get me a job.
307
00:13:16,500 --> 00:13:17,300
'I ain't puttin' up
with your crap no more.'
308
00:13:17,333 --> 00:13:19,830
That's right,
Shawn Williams is gonna
309
00:13:19,116 --> 00:13:21,233
get his self-respect back, boy.
310
00:13:24,316 --> 00:13:26,350
When the bell rings,
the nuggets are ready.
311
00:13:26,383 --> 00:13:28,660
- Put 'em in a box.
- Alright.
312
00:13:28,100 --> 00:13:29,383
When the whistle blows,
the fries are ready.
313
00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:32,000
Take 'em out,
put 'em under the heat lamp.
314
00:13:32,330 --> 00:13:33,830
Under the...heat..
315
00:13:33,116 --> 00:13:34,300
When the buzzer rings,
the burgers are ready.
316
00:13:34,333 --> 00:13:36,283
Take 'em out, stack 'em. Got it?
317
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,000
- Got it.
- Alright.
318
00:13:38,330 --> 00:13:40,500
I'm gonna take my
break,
go work on my fade.
319
00:13:40,830 --> 00:13:41,350
- Okay.
- Alright.
320
00:13:41,383 --> 00:13:43,300
Steve Harvey called.
321
00:13:43,333 --> 00:13:45,100
He wants his 'fro back.
322
00:13:46,333 --> 00:13:49,216
Welcome to Afro Burger.
Can I take your order, please?
323
00:13:49,250 --> 00:13:52,183
Shawn. Shawn Williams?
324
00:13:52,216 --> 00:13:54,830
Ms. Hanson?
325
00:13:54,116 --> 00:13:57,350
Oh, my God, I haven't seen you
since I graduated sixth grade.
326
00:13:57,383 --> 00:14:00,183
You were getting that summer
job
at the burger place.
327
00:14:00,216 --> 00:14:02,160
- Yeah, yeah.
- Well.
328
00:14:02,500 --> 00:14:03,216
Haven't you come a long way.
329
00:14:03,250 --> 00:14:04,300
[whistle blowing]
330
00:14:04,333 --> 00:14:06,300
Uh, just a sec.
331
00:14:07,316 --> 00:14:09,150
Look at him, children.
332
00:14:09,183 --> 00:14:10,266
This is what happens when you
333
00:14:10,300 --> 00:14:12,233
don't pay attention in my class.
334
00:14:12,266 --> 00:14:15,330
Nah, see...l-let me explain.
335
00:14:15,660 --> 00:14:16,166
I don't really work here.
336
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:17,300
See, I got my own business.
337
00:14:17,333 --> 00:14:19,500
Oh..
338
00:14:19,830 --> 00:14:21,330
Shawn, you don't
have to lie to me.
339
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:22,830
[ringing]
340
00:14:22,116 --> 00:14:23,350
Hello?
341
00:14:23,383 --> 00:14:26,300
Just give me 15 number 3s.
342
00:14:26,333 --> 00:14:29,330
Fifteen number threes,
got it. I got you.
343
00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:30,250
Fifteen number threes.
344
00:14:30,283 --> 00:14:33,266
[clattering]
345
00:14:44,233 --> 00:14:45,316
[car honking]
346
00:14:47,830 --> 00:14:49,830
A horn? What the hell is that?
347
00:14:49,116 --> 00:14:52,000
It's the
drive-through
window, idiot.
348
00:14:52,330 --> 00:14:54,366
Who you callin' idiot, with
your
Monica Lewinsky dress on?
349
00:14:56,133 --> 00:14:57,216
[car honking]
350
00:14:58,216 --> 00:14:59,183
Welcome to Afro Burger.
351
00:14:59,216 --> 00:15:01,500
Can I take your order, please?
352
00:15:01,830 --> 00:15:02,350
(woman on speaker)
'I'll have seven Afro
doubles--'
353
00:15:02,383 --> 00:15:05,000
Seven Afro doubles.
354
00:15:05,330 --> 00:15:06,830
'Five orders of fries.'
355
00:15:06,116 --> 00:15:08,660
- Five fries.
- 'And three malt--'
356
00:15:08,100 --> 00:15:10,183
- Three malt li--
- 'Of vanilla!'
357
00:15:10,216 --> 00:15:12,830
(Shawn)
'Three malt shakes.'
358
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:15,000
Hold on. Dee?
359
00:15:15,330 --> 00:15:16,350
Dee Baxter, is that you?
360
00:15:16,383 --> 00:15:19,133
- 'Shawn?'
- Dee.
361
00:15:19,166 --> 00:15:21,116
I thought you was on a diet.
362
00:15:21,150 --> 00:15:22,200
What's your big ass doing here?
363
00:15:22,233 --> 00:15:25,216
[tires screeching]
364
00:15:27,233 --> 00:15:29,333
Pardon me, can this line
move any faster?
365
00:15:29,366 --> 00:15:32,216
Look, lady, you're just
gonna have to wait..
366
00:15:32,250 --> 00:15:34,333
- Jasmine. Oh, my God.
- Shawn.
367
00:15:34,366 --> 00:15:36,316
So this is your
important business
lunch?
368
00:15:36,350 --> 00:15:38,216
Oh, uh, see,
I can explain the whole--
369
00:15:38,250 --> 00:15:40,350
- Don't bother.
- Hey, Jasmine.
370
00:15:40,383 --> 00:15:44,660
Girl, I hope this ain't gonna
affect our relationship, is
it?
371
00:15:44,100 --> 00:15:47,366
Outside of us not seeing
each other anymore? No.
372
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,333
But wait a minute, girl,
you may never get a chance
373
00:15:49,366 --> 00:15:51,350
to taste these nuggets!
374
00:15:51,383 --> 00:15:54,300
[instrumental music]
375
00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:57,383
Maybe you were
too rough on Shawn.
376
00:15:58,160 --> 00:15:59,300
He's been out
all hours of the
night.
377
00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:01,830
We've barely seen him all week.
378
00:16:01,116 --> 00:16:02,300
Come on, pop. Shawn's a big boy.
379
00:16:02,333 --> 00:16:04,266
He can take care of himself.
380
00:16:04,300 --> 00:16:05,383
What you all worried about?
381
00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:07,266
You ain't worried when
he's treatin' me rough.
382
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:10,150
Oh, come on, son,
you deserve it. You a fool.
383
00:16:13,383 --> 00:16:15,330
- 'Oh.'
- Hey, son.
384
00:16:15,660 --> 00:16:16,266
I see your boy is back.
385
00:16:16,300 --> 00:16:19,200
Well, I'm glad you are,
'cause, uh..
386
00:16:19,233 --> 00:16:22,150
...I got some laundry
for you to do. Bam! Handle
it.
387
00:16:22,183 --> 00:16:23,333
Peace out.
388
00:16:23,366 --> 00:16:26,166
I been workin' all week,
and I just got paid.
389
00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:27,183
Oh, okay.
390
00:16:27,216 --> 00:16:29,830
[phone ringing]
391
00:16:29,116 --> 00:16:31,216
Now go answer the phone, stupid.
392
00:16:33,100 --> 00:16:35,300
That's great, son.
What's the job?
393
00:16:35,333 --> 00:16:37,160
- Huh?
- What's the job?
394
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:38,316
Hey, hey, Shawn, Shawn.
395
00:16:38,350 --> 00:16:41,216
Some dude named Shorty.
Says you work for him.
396
00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:43,266
I'll take that in the back,
that's, um..
397
00:16:43,300 --> 00:16:45,300
...private business.
398
00:16:47,660 --> 00:16:49,330
What kinda job
give him all that
money?
399
00:16:49,660 --> 00:16:51,660
I don't know.
400
00:16:51,100 --> 00:16:53,100
What is he, being all shady
and secretive?
401
00:16:53,133 --> 00:16:55,150
- Yeah.
- Bein' out all late.
402
00:16:55,183 --> 00:16:57,200
Plus he work
for somebody named Shorty?
403
00:16:58,366 --> 00:17:00,500
(Shawn)
'Now, why do I gotta be
there'
404
00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:02,330
'so early tomorrow?'
405
00:17:02,660 --> 00:17:04,183
'For the coke delivery?'
406
00:17:04,216 --> 00:17:07,330
'But why can't the dude
deliver
the coke later in the day?'
407
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:08,500
Oh!
408
00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:12,350
[crying]
Oh, God!
My brother is a drug dealer!
409
00:17:12,383 --> 00:17:16,830
Oh, no, and I've lost my
son
to the underworld!
410
00:17:16,116 --> 00:17:18,383
God, if you rescue Shawn
from the belly of the
beast
411
00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:22,116
I promise, I promise
I'll cook with real
meat.
412
00:17:23,183 --> 00:17:25,316
Hold me, father. Oh.
413
00:17:25,350 --> 00:17:28,116
Jesus, help me, Lord,
help me, help me,
Jesus..
414
00:17:30,330 --> 00:17:31,300
Shawn, we know
what you're doing.
415
00:17:31,333 --> 00:17:34,266
Yeah, we overheard you
talking to Shorty in
there.
416
00:17:34,300 --> 00:17:35,316
Hey, well,
don't judge me, aight?
417
00:17:35,350 --> 00:17:37,183
At least I'm gettin' paid.
418
00:17:37,216 --> 00:17:39,250
Son, you.. But think of what
you doin' to our people.
419
00:17:39,283 --> 00:17:41,250
They puttin' that
junk
in their systems.
420
00:17:41,283 --> 00:17:45,000
Pop, I'm just givin' 'em
exactly what they want.
421
00:17:45,330 --> 00:17:46,233
You understand,
if they don't get it from me
422
00:17:46,266 --> 00:17:49,660
they just gonna get if from
someone right down the street.
423
00:17:49,100 --> 00:17:51,116
Besides, the kids love it.
424
00:17:53,233 --> 00:17:55,383
You sell it to the kids?
425
00:17:56,160 --> 00:17:58,150
Oh, Lord, not the babies!
426
00:18:00,830 --> 00:18:02,100
You're gonna give 'em emphysema!
427
00:18:03,660 --> 00:18:04,300
Marlon, don't knock it, man.
428
00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:07,150
The kids
are my best customers.
429
00:18:07,183 --> 00:18:09,316
Matter of fact,
any kid under eight years old
430
00:18:09,350 --> 00:18:11,333
gets a free refill.
431
00:18:13,166 --> 00:18:15,333
Hey, man, what the hell
is wrong with you?
432
00:18:15,366 --> 00:18:17,133
- What's your problem?
- Hey, hey, hey!
433
00:18:17,166 --> 00:18:19,233
- Ain't no son of mine--
- Hey, man! Back off!
434
00:18:19,266 --> 00:18:22,500
Ain't no son of mine
gonna be no drug
dealer!
435
00:18:22,830 --> 00:18:23,216
Drug dealer?
436
00:18:23,250 --> 00:18:25,216
It's okay, pop.
He's in denial.
437
00:18:25,250 --> 00:18:27,200
Listen, Shawn. You listen to me!
438
00:18:27,233 --> 00:18:29,660
What's wrong with you, man?
Stop it!
439
00:18:29,100 --> 00:18:30,266
- Listen to me!
- Stop, man!
440
00:18:30,300 --> 00:18:32,283
No, you listen!
441
00:18:37,500 --> 00:18:39,500
What's your problem, man?
442
00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:42,160
Let me tell you something..
443
00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:43,333
I'm okay, pop, I'm okay.
444
00:18:43,366 --> 00:18:47,160
Let me tell you something, man.
445
00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:49,216
It's my fault this is, this
is happening, okay? I'm
sorry.
446
00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:52,330
I didn't mean for this
to happen, Shawn, I swear,
okay?
447
00:18:52,660 --> 00:18:53,350
I'm sorry,
I'll do anything to stop
you
448
00:18:53,383 --> 00:18:55,830
from, from dealin', man.
449
00:18:55,116 --> 00:18:56,250
Look, I'll even give
you
your panty draws
back.
450
00:18:56,283 --> 00:18:58,216
Hey, hey, hey.
451
00:18:58,250 --> 00:19:00,250
Ain't nobody want that.
452
00:19:01,300 --> 00:19:03,133
Did you just say anything?
453
00:19:03,166 --> 00:19:05,133
Anything.
454
00:19:06,500 --> 00:19:07,250
Okay.
455
00:19:07,283 --> 00:19:08,350
Okay.
456
00:19:08,383 --> 00:19:10,183
You was right.
457
00:19:10,216 --> 00:19:12,830
I was dealin' drugs.
458
00:19:12,116 --> 00:19:14,160
It was easy money.
459
00:19:14,500 --> 00:19:16,150
Bing, bang, boom.
460
00:19:16,183 --> 00:19:18,183
Make the money. But now?
461
00:19:18,216 --> 00:19:20,200
I got hooked on the high life.
462
00:19:20,233 --> 00:19:22,830
I'm livin' large.
463
00:19:22,116 --> 00:19:24,366
I know, I know,
I know that, that high life
464
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:27,366
made you into a lowlife.
I kn.. I kn.. I know, baby.
465
00:19:29,300 --> 00:19:31,100
Mama knows.
466
00:19:31,133 --> 00:19:34,166
I'm tellin' you, Shawn. Look,
I just wanna apologize, man.
467
00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:35,350
Look, I know
I'm-I'm workin' on the show.
468
00:19:35,383 --> 00:19:37,166
I'll support us
both,
man, till you
469
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,316
till you get the money, okay?
470
00:19:38,350 --> 00:19:40,133
Just please, just..
471
00:19:40,166 --> 00:19:42,216
...just stop doing it.
472
00:19:42,250 --> 00:19:44,383
Hold me. Feel the love. Feel it.
473
00:19:47,660 --> 00:19:49,133
Get your hands off me, man.
474
00:19:51,660 --> 00:19:52,250
No strings attached?
475
00:19:52,283 --> 00:19:55,160
No strings attached, my friend.
476
00:19:55,383 --> 00:19:57,366
Mi amor.
477
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,330
Te quiero
478
00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:06,250
Okay.
479
00:20:06,283 --> 00:20:08,383
- I'll give it up.
- Oh, thank you, Father.
480
00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:11,183
Thank you, Lord, thank
you,
Lord, thank you, Lord.
481
00:20:11,216 --> 00:20:13,116
Thank you.
482
00:20:13,150 --> 00:20:14,383
But, uh, technically
483
00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:17,233
cow lips and ass are real meat.
484
00:20:18,166 --> 00:20:21,166
[instrumental music]
485
00:20:23,830 --> 00:20:24,383
(Shawn)
'Ooh-oof.'
486
00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:27,300
(Pops)
'For the first day, son,
you did pretty good.'
487
00:20:27,333 --> 00:20:29,830
Oh, yeah, pops.
488
00:20:29,116 --> 00:20:31,350
This is the most paper I
made
in a long time.
489
00:20:31,383 --> 00:20:34,350
- Yeah.
- Thanks to Marlon. Thanks,
bro.
490
00:20:34,383 --> 00:20:36,660
Thank you for loaning
me
the money to get
491
00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:37,266
a new contract.
I appreciate
that.
492
00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:39,333
Ah, no problem, Scarface.
493
00:20:41,283 --> 00:20:43,330
Hey, that's what
brothers are for, right?
494
00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:44,116
- You know.
- Heh.
495
00:20:44,150 --> 00:20:46,166
No, Marlon,
it was very nice of you
496
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:47,383
to help Shawn out
so he didn't have to
497
00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:50,830
work at that old
tacky burger place.
498
00:20:50,116 --> 00:20:51,200
Burger place?
499
00:20:51,233 --> 00:20:54,116
[chuckles]
500
00:20:54,150 --> 00:20:56,200
Oh, he was sellin'
Happy Meals, alright.
501
00:20:56,233 --> 00:20:58,233
Very
502
00:20:59,333 --> 00:21:02,330
- Anyway. Hey, Dee.
- What?
503
00:21:02,660 --> 00:21:04,100
I mean..
504
00:21:04,133 --> 00:21:06,000
Shawn wasn't working
at no burger joint.
505
00:21:06,330 --> 00:21:07,333
Shawn was slingin'
'em things off corners.
506
00:21:07,366 --> 00:21:10,116
- He was not, get outta here.
- Shawn was sellin' them
things.
507
00:21:10,150 --> 00:21:11,283
- Nah!
- Dee, he was..
508
00:21:11,316 --> 00:21:13,366
- Eh, he was selling the
yayo--
- Marlon.
509
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:15,333
- Marlon.
- What?
510
00:21:15,366 --> 00:21:17,200
Can't lie to you no more, man.
511
00:21:17,233 --> 00:21:19,160
Dee's right.
512
00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:23,133
I wasn't selling drugs.
I was workin' at Afro Burger.
513
00:21:23,166 --> 00:21:26,000
That order of coke
you overheard me talkin' about
514
00:21:26,330 --> 00:21:28,160
was for Coca-Cola.
515
00:21:29,660 --> 00:21:31,500
It was a real thing, though.
516
00:21:31,830 --> 00:21:33,366
So you was just playing me.
517
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,283
Kinda.
518
00:21:35,316 --> 00:21:37,830
Alright, I..
519
00:21:37,116 --> 00:21:38,333
...I guess we even.
520
00:21:38,366 --> 00:21:40,166
Okay. I'm not mad.
521
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:42,150
I guess I did get a
little bit
out of control with
power.
522
00:21:42,183 --> 00:21:45,333
- Something like the way you--
- A little out of control?
523
00:21:45,366 --> 00:21:48,500
Alright, look, when I'm
broke,
you look out for me.
524
00:21:48,830 --> 00:21:49,300
When you broke,
I'll look out for
you.
525
00:21:49,333 --> 00:21:51,116
- You bet. That's a deal.
- Alright? Alright.
526
00:21:51,150 --> 00:21:52,216
- One love, man.
- I don't need all that
love.
527
00:21:52,250 --> 00:21:54,116
That's cool right where it's..
528
00:21:54,150 --> 00:21:57,150
[instrumental music]
37385
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