All language subtitles for Agents Très Spéciaux - Code U N C L E 2015 MULTI VFF-VO-VFQ HDlight 1080p x264 AC3-PopHD.eng

You look important.

Or, at least,
your suit does.

Well, I can get you
over the wall.

Would you consider that
important, Fraulein Schmidt?

A smart mouth
to go with the suit.

Statements like that
can get you

into a lot of trouble
around here.

Or, they can get you
out of it.

Make yourself comfortable,
why don't you.

Okay, Mr. important suit,

who are you
and what do you want?

I'm here to have a friendly chat
about your father.

I don't have a father.

I don't mean your late
foster father, the mechanic.

I mean your real father.
Dr. Udo Teller.

Hitler's favorite
rocket scientist.

That doesn't sound
very friendly.

You're wasting your time.

I haven't seen him
for 18 years.

Well, after the war,
he came to work for us.

He'd been enjoying
the American dream.

He had a great job working
for the U.S. nuclear program...

Pleasant house in the suburbs...
A new Cadillac

and a fat little dog
called "Schnitzel."

Then, two years ago,

he disappeared
like steam from a tea kettle.

Until now.

This was taken last week
in Rome.

Which one is supposed to be
my father?

Funny.

I'm told that
if your father's knowledge

gets into the wrong hands,

things could get a little messy.

You know,
end of the world.

That kind of thing.

What makes you think
I know where he is?

I don't think you do,

but I think you know
someone who does.

Your mother's brother:
Uncle Rudi.

I've also been told
that your father was never...

Actually a Nazi.

He was forced to work
for them.

So I'm here to help him.

- Why don't you help me.
- With what?

If I had 15 minutes,
we'd drink tea, eat biscuits,

I'd talk, you'd laugh,
and we'd be on our way.

Unfortunately, I don't.

So my offer is
come with me now

and be at a Chic little hotel
in West Berlin

in less than an hour.

Or stay here and spend the night
with the Russians

hanging from a pipe,
having your toenails removed.

That is what
I was looking for.

Do you mind terribly
if I borrow your car?

Could you pass me
that brown paper bag

from my case, please?

Are they still following us?

Yes.

Is there one of them?

Just hum if there is.

Mm.

Is he looking at us?

Mm.

Does he have just one hand
on the steering wheel?

Mm-hmm.

When you hear something
that sounds like a gunshot...

Drive.

Did you get him?

Let's just hope he doesn't drive
as quickly as he moves.

I got news for you.

He does.

Make a right.

And then an immediate left.

Nicely done.

Hold on.

Is he gone?

You know,
I don't think so.

Reverse down the sidewalk,

and then drive
around the block.

And, uh...

Meet me back here.

I think you should
look out the window.

You can't be serious.

He's trying to stop
the car.

We're struggling here.

Why don't you
take a shot at him?

Somehow it just doesn't seem
like the right thing to do.

First left,
then immediate right.

This road
isn't going anywhere.

It's taking us
exactly where we want to go.

It's getting narrower.
It's all part of the plan.

Now, put your foot down
and drive a little faster.

Good plan.

All we have to do
is get over two 20-foot walls

and a minefield.

Now what?

Take another left
through the window.

After you.

Follow me.

What are we doing here?

We're looking for agent Jones.

Hug me.

Jones, reverse!

Step back.

This place isn't Chic.

It isn't even a hotel.

No. But it's safer.
And the food isn't bad.

What's that?
Smells like feet.

Expensive feet.

He's here.

Our commitment to defend
Western Europe

and West Berlin, for example,
stands undiminished.

The United States will make
no deal with the Soviet Union

because the communist drive
to impose

their political
and economic system on others

is the primary cause
of world tension today.

I trust that miss Teller
was helpful.

You were right.

The Uncle, Rudolph Von Trulsch,
is the best shot.

That's it?
That's all you got?

He lives in Italy.
Rome.

Works for a shipping company
called Vinciguerra.

And now
you have Miss Teller.

My work here is done.

We already knew all that.

Your job here is done
when I tell you it's done.

You told me this was gonna be
a simple extraction.

It shoulda been.

I didn't ask you to light up
half of East Berlin.

They were waiting for me.
Don't flatter yourself.
They follow everybody.

What was waiting for me
was barely human.

You should've seen it run.

Grow a spine, Solo.

Contrary
to what you may think,

we are not in
the haberdashery business.

I don't think you understand.
It tore the back off my car.

Remind me, Solo.

How long
was your prison sentence?

You owe me five more years.

Now, I know you've been

taking care of yourself
on the side,

wetting your beak,
so to speak.

We don't pay you enough

to be able to put truffles
in your Risotto, Solo.

But don't ever make
the calamitous error

of mistaking
my deliberate short-sightedness

for blindness.

Now, you report for duty
tomorrow morning,

9:00 A.M. sharp.

And with a better attitude.

Look at 'em.

Merrily oblivious
as we labor tirelessly

to save them from extinction
and not even a thank you.

I tell myself, Solo,

that inside every Kraut,

there's an American
trying to get out.

A little tired
this morning, sir?

You'd be, too,
if you'd been up all night

trying to sort
this mess out.

Anything in particular,
sir, or...?

Or are you
just looking?

What I'm about to feed you,
Solo,

might taste a little bitter.

Nevertheless,
you're gonna have to swallow it.

Where we going
with this, sir?

Adrian.

Kuryakin.

What does that mean?

He said, "don't kill
your partner on your first day."

I know what he said.
What does it mean?

The main ingredient
of an Atom bomb

is enriched uranium.

Dr. Teller was
on the verge of a breakthrough

which would massively simplify
this process.

Making it possible

for almost anyone
to build a nuclear device.

We believe that

the Vinciguerra shipping
and aerospace company in Rome,

where Miss Teller's Uncle Rudi
is a senior executive,

is, in fact, the cover

for an international
criminal organization

with ties to former Nazis.

The founder,
Sergio Vinciguerra,

was a friend of Mussolini
and a known fascist.

Rumor has it
Sergio was responsible

for smuggling the Nazis' gold
to South America after the war.

It is now run by his son,
Alexander,

and his wife, Victoria.

Al, he's more playboy
than Tycoon.

But she...

Well, now,
she's something else altogether.

All our information
indicates a lethal combination

of beauty, brains and ambition.

She's the real fanatic.

Now that the old man is dead,
she's running the show.

We believe they're responsible
for Dr. Teller's disappearance.

Now...

Imagine the consequences

if he builds an Atom bomb
for them.

We have no choice
but to work together on this.

Your mission is to infiltrate
this organization

and to retrieve Dr. Teller
and his research.

It will be located
on a computer disk.

And whoever has that disk
will simply be

the most powerful nation
in the world.

You, Solo,
are to investigate

Victoria and Alexander
Vinciguerra.

Our Russian friend will focus on
Miss Teller and her Uncle Rudi.

We'll leave you two
to get acquainted.

Oleg.
Give my regards to Nina.

Obviously,
I was briefed about you.

Your corrupt and criminal
background...

Until you were caught

and the CIA blackmailed you
into working for them.

But what interests me,
given your profile,

is what would motivate you
to become

the CIA's most effective agent.

I concluded it must be
to counteract

the humiliation
of knowing your balls

are at the end
of a very long leash

held by a very short man.

I'm sure you understand
humiliation better than most.

Really? How so?

Well, after your performance
last night,

I thought
I should read up on you.

Rather a sad story,

what with your dad being
a big pal of Stalin's

and a top government official

with all the perks
and privileges...

Right up until he was caught
embezzling party funds.

How old were you
when he was sent to the Gulag?

10? 11 years old?

Was that when
the psychotic episodes started?

You did, however,
rise above it.

Special forces, KGB.

The youngest man to join,
in fact,

and their best
within three years.

I do wonder
if it was your father's shame

that gave you such drive,
though.

Or...

Was it your mother's
reputation?

I understand
that she was extremely popular

amongst your father's friends

after he was shipped off
to Siberia.

America is teaming up
with Russia.

Is this a joke?

It should tell you how important
this mission is.

To everyone.

I'm not going back
behind that wall.

And at the end of this,
that's what they'll want.

You don't have to go anywhere
that you don't want to go.

You're the star
of this show.

My woman would never wear
anything like that.

What's he doing here?

I told you. We're teaming up
with the Russians.

Doesn't get any more Russian
than the Red Peril here.

And why did he call me
his woman?

Because I am now
your fianc�.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

No!

Smoothly done.

Gaby.

Gaby.

Wait.

Give me a minute to explain.

It's your cover.

He's an architect
designing a new resort

for heroes of the Soviet Union
by the black sea.

The Russian minister of culture

has a weakness
for classical architecture

and he's sending your man there
to Rome to study.

He's also managed to secure
a visa for his fianc�e.

And naturally,
you'd introduce him

to your beloved Uncle Rudi.

And what about you?
What's your cover?

Jack Deveny,

antiquities dealer, specializing
in Greek and Roman sculpture.

The Vinciguerra family
just happen to have

one of the finest collections
in the world.

You're asking
too much of me.

You'll do fine.

No.

These dresses
are all in your size.

Excuse me?

Soviet architect
traveling to Rome

would never dress
his woman

in the clothes
you tried to put her in.

You tried to dress her
like someone on your side

thinks someone dress
behind the iron curtain.

She's from behind
the iron curtain.

That doesn't mean
she wants to bring it with her.

We need two purses, please.
An everyday and a clutch.

And grab that belt.

No.

No, not the Dior,
the Rabanne.

You can't put
a Paco Rabanne belt on a Patou.

She's not going to wear
a Patou.

What's wrong with a Patou?

Nothing.
If you're fat.

The Dior goes
with the Rabanne.

It won't match.

It doesn't have to match.

Have you seen
the price of this handbag?

It costs more
than my car.

You can get back
on your horse now, cowboy.

I'll see you in Rome.

Not bad.

I like this. Yes.

But it's missing...

A little something.

Now we are engaged.

Congratulations.

Enjoy your stay,
Mr. Waverly.

I hope so.

Jack Deveny.
Checking in.

Welcome to Rome,
Mr. Deveny.

Thank you.

I have a quick errand
to run.

Could you have my bag
taken to my room, please?

Of course.

Thank you.

Luigi.

Where are we going?

The same place
every architect goes

when they visit Rome.

To see the sights.

Hm.

So, Mr. Architect...

I'm sure you've done
your homework.

Why don't you tell me
a bit about the steps.

Good question.

The steps were constructed
in 1723.

Credited to
two Italian architects.

Really, built by Russian.

Sergei Ivanov.

Now, Sergei also had mother,
Yagoda,

who introduced him
to classical architecture

and whom he revered
as his muse.

Unfortunately for Sergei,

his mother died
in the middle of construction.

So in memory
of his beloved Yagoda,

he make one step to celebrate
every year of his mother's life.

So she died at 135.

No.

She died at 100.
He was 35.

So 135 steps.

Impressive.

So she gave birth
at the age of 65?

No. I...

evening, comrade.

You're not supposed to be
making contact in public.

- You're being followed.
- I know.

Two men from hotel lobby,
mid-30s,

one in brown suit,
other in leather jacket,

which is why
you should leave.

They diverted when you turned
down the steps.

So I imagine they'll be waiting
ahead for you.

I will handle them.

"Handle"?

Just to avoid any confusion,

you do mean give 'em your wallet
and act scared?

"Scared"?

What's going on?

You're being tested.

Someone is trying
to make sure

that your fianc�
is really an architect

and not someone
who's trained how to fight.

KGB agent, for example.

I said
you are not needed here.

I think you should
do as he says.

And remember...

Take it like a pussy.

This is not
the Russian way.

Nice shoes.

Thank you.

Perhaps
you give them to me.

I think your feet
are a little small.

Then gimme some money
for coffee.

Hm?

Dearest...

Give the gentlemen
something for coffee.

Enjoy your coffee.

Nice watch.

Darling,
give him the watch.

And the ring.

Thank you.

Give me the watch!

Give him the watch!

Illya.

Do as he says.

Calm down.

Not very good at this whole
subtlety thing, are you?

That man stole
my father's watch.

Aren't you supposed to be
a Russian architect?

Da, but a Russian architect
would fight.

Russian agent
would've killed them both.

So it's no trouble

unless you continue to question
my actions.

So you've actually
thought this through.

Would you like to finish
what you started?

Stop!

You two are supposed to be
looking after me.

So why am I
playing mother, huh?

Either you start to look like
you know what you're doing...

Or I'm out of here.

It's open.

Good evening,
Mr. Deveny.

With the compliments
of the hotel.

I apologize
it wasn't brought up earlier.

Thank you very much.

Is there anything else
I can do for you?

It's a fine
bottle of champagne.

Be a shame
to drink it alone.

Oh.

Uh...

I'm still on duty,
Mr. Deveny.

Pity.

But...

My shift ends
in five minutes.

I'm sure we can find something
to do for five minutes.

There's a party tomorrow
to celebrate

the 50th anniversary
of Vinciguerra shipping.

Uncle Rudi
has invited us.

Drink?

No. Thank you.

Would you like
bigger glass?

I will finish this bottle.

The only question is...

Are you gonna help me
or not?

No. Thank you.

This is fun?

This is not good idea.

I am going to bed.
Please turn this off.

No fun
dancing by yourself.

I need a partner.

No.

"No," as you can't dance?

Or you don't want to?

We'll call it both.

Clap.

And then...

Sorry.

Sorry.

You're not in East German
chop shop anymore.

Still no drink?

Don't you make me
put you over my knee.

So you don't
want to dance.

But you do
want to wrestle.

No, I did not say that.

Good night,
little chop shop girl.

This time,
I do need to go.

That is disappointing.

Just another five minutes?

I know your five minutes,
Mr. Deveny.

What are you doing here?
You're not supposed to be here.

These...

Are...

Russian...

Made.

One second.

These...

Are...

American...

Made.

And very low-tech.

That bow tie doesn't work
with that suit.

Good morning.

I enjoyed last night.

Is better for the mission

that we get to know each other
little bit more...

Intimately.

What does that mean?

It means
I like my woman strong.

Come.

Come on.

Maybe I get you present.

Mm.

Pump the brakes,
my Russian friend.

We might be engaged,
but I'm my own woman.

Besides, I wouldn't be wearing
my engagement ring.

Remember?
It's only just been stolen.

Your fianc�
would have gone out

first thing in the morning
to replace it.

Now we are engaged.

Again.

After you, fianc�.

Beg your pardon.

Excuse me, sir?
Excuse me?

Sir? Excuse me, sir?

Your invitation?

Of course.

I wonder,
did I leave it in the jag?

Could you please
come with me, sir?

I'm sure
we can clear this up.

Why on earth would you do that?

- Sorry.
- He doesn't have an invitation.

Are you okay?

- Thank you.
- But...

thank you.

I wonder what they do to people
without invitations.

I'm Victoria Vinciguerra.

I do believe an apology
is in order.

I'll take it from here.

Thank you.

Oh.

I'm okay, I think.

Is this beautiful woman
I hardly recognize

my favorite niece?

Gaby.

It's been too long.

You are a miracle worker, sir.

I want to hear all about
how you managed to get her out.

Contessa...

Jack Deveny.

Come sta, Contessa?

Yes, please.

Tell me,
how does a Russian architect

meet a German car mechanic
in East Berlin?

Well, it started
when I was brought out

to make improvements
on nine kilometers of the wall.

And one morning,
I was coming home...

He rear-ended a tank.

That is when I met

the most expensive mechanic
in East Germany.

And did they make you build
the wall as well as design it?

You're shaped like
a powerlifter, not an architect.

I like to jog.

How did you get the invitation
to my party?

Before we get there...

Allow me.

Contessa's a little heavy
with the lipstick.

And you're a little light
with your fingers.

Come sta, Contessa?

Well, I doubt
she'll miss it.

Etruscan, isn't it?

Oh.

May I?

If you don't,
there could be trouble.

What about my watch?

Are we in a rush?

No, I don't suppose
we are.

Now tell me, when did
this happy accident occur?

Two years ago.

- Two years ago?
- Yes.

You never wrote your Uncle Rudi
a word about it.

I wanted to make sure
it was serious.

Or were you,
perhaps, ashamed?

Why would she
be ashamed?

I know that the equity
of aristocratic blood

is not appreciated
by most communists.

But a good German girl knows
never to mix

the blood of a racehorse
with that of a cart horse.

Uncle Rudi?

That's not
a very nice thing to say.

Don't be so protective.

I'm sure our weightlifter
can defend himself.

Excuse me.

So you're a thief.

I like to call myself

a specialist
in complicated acquisitions.

I hope you wear a mask.

Sometimes.

Just never
when I'm stealing things.

What is it, exactly,
that you think

you can do for me,
Mr. Jack?

Let's just say I fill gaps
in important collections.

Those one or two
special pieces

that are impossible
to acquire without the...

The requisite skill set.

Gaby...

Victoria,
this is my Gaby.

The famous niece.

Hello.

I need to use the sink.

So use the ladies'.

What brings you to Rome,
Mr. Deveny?

Just here to see
the sights.

- Oh.
- Rudi.

- Ah, Waverly.
- Nice to see you.

Waverly runs the shipping
department at British oil.

Excuse me,
I said I need to use the sink.

What?

I am sorry
I'm so late, Rudi.

I stupidly seem to have lost
my invitation.

Jack Deveny.

Yes. Yes, I think we bumped
into each other outside.

Beg your pardon.

I do apologize.

No, not at all.
Not at all.

I noticed you're very good
with your hands.

Excuse me?

He said, "use the ladies'."

I witnessed your trick
with the tablecloth.

That's brilliant.
Were you once a waiter or...?

Have the jets been cleansed

and totally rechecked
for size and flow?

Oh, really?
Do you want to fix it?

I'd be delighted.

So I just need
the wrench.

I'd better give the Contessa
back her bracelet.

Why don't you pop into
the office tomorrow morning.

We can talk more
about filling in my gaps.

I'll try not to disappoint.

You see,
each one of us has a destiny.

And I believe I can help you
with yours.

You can see the future?

I can see us
having lunch tomorrow.

Alone.

Darling, time to go.
Sorry.

Darling,
I'll be a minute.

Now.

What are you doing?

Another time, perhaps.

Leaving so soon?

Illya isn't feeling
very well.

But we've had
a wonderful time.

Thank you, Uncle Rudi.

Where's Peril?

He's been in there
half an hour.

You've been spending a lot
of time in bathrooms recently.

Apparently, you put
someone called Count Lippi

in a hospital.

He had soft bones.
And don't question my methods.

What's he done?

Super agent here
decided to have some fun

with three young Italian boys
in the men's room.

They had it coming.

You need to control
your temper.

Your new boyfriend is a Nazi.

How did you find
Alexander Vinciguerra?

I think he's an athletic,
good-looking gazillionaire

who's offered me a job
and made advances towards me.

Still a Nazi.

I quite like him.

Yes, but is he
up to no good?

If you mean
by "no good,"

is he trying to steal me
away from my fianc�?

- The answer is yes.
- That's not happening.

I don't know
what you're upset about.

You're not even my fianc�.

As far as he is concerned,
I am.

And for the purpose
of the mission, I am.

So, like I said,
it's not happening.

Look at this.

This film I'm using
has been treated

to be sensitive
to gamma radiation.

These blurred lines here

means they've been
in close proximity

to radioactive material
in last 24 hours,

which means they have succeeded
in enriching the uranium.

We need to move quicker.

Tell you what,
I'm gonna go sleep on this.

Is this what you call
sleeping on it?

I suppose you're responsible
for the lights.

You're welcome.

The thing is...

I work better alone.

I work better alone, too.

I'm not leaving.

We have approximately 10 minutes
before the power comes back on.

You want to sit around
and talk about it...

Okay.
I'll let you tag along.

But it's in and out, no mess,
so nobody knows we've been here.

And we both forget about it
in the morning.

Okay.

What is that?

Super-hardened boron
sharpened with a CO2 laser.

Hm.

CO2 laser.

Coming?

I take top.

I'll take the bottom.

Problem?

Is there anything
I can do to help?

Yes. Be quiet.

Just let me do it.

Shall we?

Loving your work,
Peril.

Suca.

You do the labs.

I'll take the floor.

Meet me on the gantry
in five minutes.

Try not to get lost.

I didn't find anything.

Wait.

Why?

I thought that was
my father's watch.

Make mistake.

And what exactly
did you do to him?

At KGB,
we call it the kiss.

It takes years to master.

Although he's standing upright,
he's completely unconscious.

He'll be like this
for 20 minutes.

Can't touch.

Generator's back on.

Why do you think they have
radiation tools and suit

in satellite factory?

Next to hidden button.

We wouldn't have found that
without my father's watch.

Want to have a go?

Be my guest.

Hold this.

And these.

Uh, open these.

This...

Is a Swiss-built...

Vortbinderlanszmann
7010 model.

It has dual combination locks,
triple return rotators...

...and synchronized
cylinders.

The earlier models...

Had a design flaw.

It's a flaw
I intend to exploit.

Still...

...very difficult
to open.

But it's not...

...impossible.

And the flaw was...

People who designed this model
are not very good...

At stealing things.

I, however...

Am.

Did you deactivate alarm?

Model 7010
doesn't have an alarm.

Loving your work, cowboy.

Time to go!

Does this mean
anything to you?

It's part of centrifuge
for refining uranium.

I am not staying here.

Where are you gonna go?

Swimming.

We've got three exits,
and two of them are closed.

I would recommend turning
before you hit that wall.

The last thing I need
is your help.

You're not gonna make it.

Just shut up
and watch me work.

Hold on, cowboy.

Hm.

Keep quiet.

Follow me.

Mr. Deveny's room, please.

Hello?

Gaby...

It's done.

Room 304, please.

The meeting
is confirmed.

Sorry, Mrs. Vinciguerra,
there's no answer.

Key.

What's going on?

Where's my case?

Hello, Victoria.

Grape?

You've bugged him?

He tried to bug me.

He doesn't sound like
he needs your help.

You sure Victoria
believed you?

I gave it
everything I had.

Believe me.

I also got another meeting
with her later today.

So, what, we just let Gaby go
with Uncle Rudi?

If there's a chance
he'll lead us to her father,

do we have a choice?

This could be like leading
lamb to slaughter.

Going soft, Peril?

What you talking about?

- Good morning.
- Morning.

Your tracker's not sending
a signal.

Have you turned it on?

I think so.

Or do you
want to check it?

Be my guest.

It's your tracker.

You're the expert.
I'll be on the balcony.

They're still cold.

Sorry.

What are you
doing down there?

Trying not to get lost.

You're trembling.

That's because I'm scared.

It's going to be okay.

How do you know?

I'll be...

I'll be close by.

All turned on now?

Uncle Rudi's car has arrived.
Are you ready?

So your Uncle Rudi thinks
we should have a little chat.

I know my father is here
and that he works for you.

And how is that?

Simple.

I think I need to make
a telephone call.

Well, perhaps
you've come to us

at a fortuitous time,
Miss Teller.

Your father's work ethic

has been, as of late,
somewhat lacking.

Your presence will provide
the necessary motivation.

You leave my father to me.

Madame Vinciguerra
will be with you shortly.

She would like it if you
make yourself comfortable.

Thank you.

Help yourself to a drink.

So sorry
to keep you waiting.

You don't look like you slept
much last night, Mr. Deveny.

Funny you should say that,
Madame Vinciguerra.

Don't think this scotch
is helping either.

If I were a suspicious man,

I would say you put something
in my drink.

It's much easier to trust
a drink you fixed yourself.

But how did you know
I was gonna drink the scotch?

I didn't.

I laced all the drinks.

I don't like to leave
much to chance...

Mr. Solo.

I thought I was doing
so well.

Oh, don't be so hard
on yourself.

You were doing
fantastically well.

The fault doesn't lie
in your performance.

However, you couldn't control
the loyalty of young Gaby.

She gave you up
like an unwanted kitten.

I know my father is here
and that he works for you.

And how is that?

Simple.
My fianc�'s a KGB agent.

And the American
your wife has been entertaining

is with the CIA.

The Russians and the Americans
thought they were using me,

but I was using them
to get to you.

Really?

She seemed so innocent.

You're not the first man
to have fallen

for the charms
of a pretty, young woman.

It's a tracking device.

He's probably out there
in the woods

watching us right now.

I'm sure my...

Fianc� can confirm
everything I've said.

If you can catch him.

I think I need to make
a telephone call.

What are you doing?

I've been here before.

And last time, I fell
rather badly and hurt my head.

I'm afraid that isn't going
to stop you getting hurt.

Sleep well, Napoleon.

Only my mother
calls me Napoleon.

Mummy says hello.

You may have heard
of the Dark Angel of Ravensberg,

the butcher of Belsen.

And my personal favorite:

The fifth horseman,
doctor of the apocalypse.

What history
has failed to relate

is that this was not
three individuals,

but the tireless work
of a single artist.

And today,
you have the privilege

of experiencing his work
firsthand.

Hello again, Mr. Solo.

My apologies.

There's a short
in the wiring.

I thought I'd located it.

I keep telling the maestro
to modernize, but alas...

He's a hopeless
sentimentalist.

Oh.

We have contact.

Ah!

My apologies.

Won't happen again.

I'm so sorry I can't stay
to finish you off myself.

Rudi's never in a rush,
but sadly, I am.

And I want it
to be slow.

I'll send your regards
to little Gaby.

Once upon a time,
there was a little boy.

You wouldn't describe him

as a particularly special
little boy.

He was neither tall
nor handsome,

charismatic or amusing.

In fact, he appeared to be
exceedingly dull.

Because of this boy's
apparent shortcomings,

he was bullied mercilessly

and relentlessly
by the other children.

Year merged
with miserable year

as life continued to be
a living hell.

But what the other boys didn't
understand about their victim

was that he didn't see them
as enemies.

He saw them
as instruments of learning.

A priceless lesson was gleaned
from his tormentors.

Man has only two masters
in this world.

And their names
are pain and fear.

The boy found
he had quite a talent

for eliciting these feelings
in others.

So on the principle of playing
to your strengths,

he decided to make their
cultivation his life's work.

Fortunately for this boy,

history gave him
an unprecedented opportunity.

A world war.

The canvas, Mr. Solo,

on which he would produce
his greatest work.

You will go here,
Mr. Solo.

A whole page just for you.

And not in black and white,
like the others.

No.

Kodachrome.

The colors are so real,
you can almost taste them.

Ready?

There are two kinds of torture,
Mr. Solo.

One is for the extraction
of information.

The other...

Is for its own sake.

I must admit,
this does get frustrating.

But fortunately...

I'm in
an old-fashioned mood.

I think we'll start...

With the pliers.

I never thought
I'd say this.

I'm actually
quite pleased to see you.

You doing okay,
cowboy?

I thought I found
all your trackers.

You did.
Just not the ones in your shoes.

Do you mind?

You don't have to do things
to me to make me talk.

I'll tell you
everything I know.

You won't be able to stop me.

What about Gaby?

She betrayed you.
I will testify.

Don't kick yourself.
She fooled me, too.

It's not the same.

They have a glitch.

Then I'll fix it.

Wait. Please wait.

Do you still
have Teller?

Yes.

Has he succeeded
in enriching the uranium?

Oh, we are way beyond that.

There's already a bomb,
a nuclear warhead.

The reichsmarschall
will take delivery

tomorrow morning at 8:00.

They're sending a submarine.

Between that time and now,
it is being held

on Vinciguerra Island,
the family's private retreat.

I'll appear in court.
I'll inform on anyone.

I don't even need
to know them.

I'm yours to command.

Will you give us
a minute?

Don't go anywhere.

I'll be right here.

What do you think
we should do?

We have to get
to that Island.

What should we do
with him?

It's your call.

You're the one
he's been having fun with.

On the one hand,
we need him,

he's a world
of information.

But on the other hand,
I know exactly what'll happen.

He'll strike a deal
and struggle out of it.

He's prepared
to sell his ass on this,

and for that,
they'll give him his freedom.

He'll be out within months.

Or worse,
they'll offer him a job.

A man with that skill set's
never wanting for employment.

So, what do you think
we should do?

Just give me a minute.

Huh.

He fixed the glitch.

Damn.

I left my jacket
in there.

I'll let you two
get reacquainted.

Okay. Thank you.

That got their attention.

They'll have chopper
waiting for us at airport.

Gaby...

Mr. Solo,
we meet again.

Mr. Kuryakin.
My name's Waverly.

I believe your instructions
are to follow me, so, uh...

Follow me.

Very well done,
my darling.

They will send an army
to stop us.

Then we must give them
an appropriate welcome.

The line is secured.
You're now connected, sir.

You will report
to Commander Waverly

of British
Naval Intelligence

for the remainder
of the mission.

It is vital you retrieve

Dr. Teller
and the computer disk.

They are the key

to the U.S. of A.
Winning the arms race.

Kill the Russian,
if necessary.

Gentlemen, can you hear me?

Well, now if the Nazis
are due to take delivery

of this bomb at 0800,
then that gives us...

A luxurious 14 hours
in which to seize the Island,

secure the warhead,

and winkle out
poor Professor Teller.

There is also, of course,

the small matter
of retrieving my agent.

You have British agent
in this?

- Well, she's not British.
- "She"?

Here we go.

I'm starting to smell
the irony.

Gaby's working for you,
isn't she?

Oh, well done, Solo,
yep, yep.

You got there in the end.

My father
has been unwell.

That and the stress
led to self-doubt.

He's ready now
to resume his work.

A daughter's touch.

Gaby has agreed to assist me
to assure I finish in time.

Now that is a good idea.

You're wrong.

The thing is, Kuryakin,

that when Professor Teller
disappeared,

we assumed
that his Nazi colleagues

would come knocking
at his daughter's door,

so we recruited her
and waited.

And what we got, of course,
was you two.

I've been meaning
to thank you very much

for nearly fouling up
two years of my work.

You're wrong. I saw her
betray us at Vinciguerra.

Yes. I told her to.

The meeting is confirmed.

I think you know what
you have to do, Miss Teller.

You were about to be
exposed, Kuryakin.

It was the only way
she could stay in the game.

She knew that the ring
you gave her was bugged

and that you'd be listening
to every word she said.

If you can catch him. That would give
even the average Russian agent

plenty of time to escape.

And, of course,
you are not average,

are you, Kuryakin?
You're special.

Let me translate this
into English.

You told Gaby
to drop us in it

so you could find
her father first.

But now you've lost her,

so you need us to help find her
and finish the job.

Well, that is a very poor
translation, Solo, but...

Well, in a nutshell,
yes, please.

Thank you very much.

I think it's rather nice.

I mean, we're obviously
all very fond of Gaby

and now we have a chance
to save her, so...

Terrific.
We're a little early.

What is that?!

It's an aircraft carrier,
Kuryakin.

For a special agent,

you aren't having
a very special day, are you?

Reflector lens.

So, what does that do?

Well,
it's known as a coupler.

It sends a signal
which enables another missile

to lock onto this one
for double the impact.

It's left over
from when this was a warhead

that contained
conventional explosives.

Now that we are converting it
to nuclear, it's redundant.

I'm sorry.

We're nearly done,
Victoria.

Those are the words
we've been waiting to hear.

What are you doing?

Let's both stop playing games,
shall we?

Put her in a cell.

If you don't hear from me
in 20 minutes, kill her.

That's how long you have
to finish this.

You can start by putting back
the correct lens, professor.

So, Vinciguerra Island.

The plot is...

and stop me if I get this wrong,
Jockelson...

a stealth attack on the Island
from the sea.

We shall go in through the front
door here at the harbor.

Jockelson and his men
will get you in there

and keep the enemy
entertained.

The rest is up to you.

It's done.

And with three minutes
to spare.

The computer disk
with your research on it,

where is it?

And the backup.

What about Gaby?

She'll be
joining you shortly.

Looks like we found
Dr. Teller.

The bomb was here.

Hm.

Illya, come in.

I'm here.

Alexander has Gaby
and the bomb.

They're at the entrance.

Illya!

Solo!

Cowboy.

I'll be okay, Peril.

It's okay.

Well done, chaps.

Just one small snag.

Wrong warhead.

So it's a decoy.

No, no, no, it's a real bomb.
Quite a nasty one, too.

But not nuclearized.
There's no uranium in it.

There was a second warhead
in the lab.

Did you check
everything I asked, captain?

Radar, sonar,
aerial patrols

all report no other vehicles
have left this Island

since last night.

That includes submarines.

What about fishing boats
leaving the mainland?

The boats go out
every morning at dawn.

I saw them.
How many of them are there?

Almost 100.

They are spread out over
a 60-kilometer radius by now.

Yes, and that radius
is expanding every minute.

We don't even know
which boat we're looking for.

Rumor has it
that Sergio Vinciguerra,

who was responsible

for smuggling the Nazis' gold
to South America

at the end of the war.

He died five years ago,

having built Vinciguerra

into one of the biggest
shipping companies in the world.

Submarine surfaces at 0800,

which gives us 20 minutes,
gentlemen.

Diadema.

That's Sergio Vinciguerra's
old fishing boat.

I suggest we start there.

Can you get them
on the radio?

You can get a bearing
from the radio signal, yes?

If we keep them broadcasting
for long enough.

I have an idea
which might make things quicker.

Ten minutes and counting.

Mr. Solo, this is your cue.
Thank you.

Diadema,
this is Napoleon Solo.

Hello, Victoria.

I suspect that
you're already listening,

so I'll give you
this message directly.

Earlier today,
I killed your husband.

We're wasting our time.
This isn't working.

If you could just shut up,
thank you very much, Captain.

Ramp it up, please, Solo.
Come on.

I'd like to report

that he died honorably,
courageously, and selflessly.

But he didn't.

Instead, it was
a rather pitiful affair

involving tears, begging,

and offers to trade
anything and, indeed, anyone

so that I would spare
his life.

Napoleon.

I appreciate
your message,

and now I hope
you'll appreciate mine.

Any blood relation of yours
still living

will be dead
within the year.

They will die
slowly and painfully.

And you know
from personal experience

this is an area
in which we excel.

Bearing 045, Captain.

There's nothing
you'll be able to do

but witness their suffering
as you await your own death,

which I will save
for last.

This I vow
on my husband's soul.

It's all yours,
Captain. Thank you.

Won't you have to inform your
organization to achieve that?

After we deliver the warhead
you so desperately sought,

it will be the first item
on my agenda.

And you will die, Solo,
knowing you failed completely.

We have
the Professor's disk.

We can build
as many bombs as we need.

- Ready?
- Yes, proceed please, Captain.

I see one flaw
in that plan.

Entertain me.

While you've been telling me
how dangerous you are,

we've been locking on
to your radio signal.

Now, you can get a bearing
from the radio signal, yes?

If we keep them broadcasting
for long enough.

They're at 045,
Captain.

It's all yours, Captain.
Thank you.

Now we have
your general location.

It won't help you much.
I'll be gone in five minutes.

I haven't finished.

The coupling device

that you so considerately
left us on your decoy warhead

is accurate to 10 feet.

I have an idea which
might make things quicker.

Well,
it's known as a coupler.

It sends a signal,
which enables another missile

to lock onto this one
for double the impact.

The coupling device
is now activated,

and the bomb is armed.

That warhead,
although not nuclear,

shouldn't have
any trouble obliterating

a medium-size
fishing boat.

The aforementioned warhead
launched...

- Ready?
- Yes, proceed please, Captain.

...45 seconds ago...

...giving you about 30 seconds
until impact.

It won't trigger
the nuclear warhead,

as that requires fission.

So...

If you do want to make good
on your vow,

I suggest you abandon ship
immediately.

How's that for entertainment?

Very good.

Well done, Solo.

All packed?

The bellboy
is on his way up.

It's time to go home.

How about you?

I'm not going back
to East Germany.

No, that is probably not
a good idea for a British spy.

I'm sorry.

I really wanted to tell you,
but...

It's okay.

I would have done exactly
the same thing in your position.

I'm sorry about your father.

I lost him
a long time ago.

Cowboy's invited us
for a drink up in his room,

if you'd like.
I have to see Waverly.

In case we don't
see each other again.

No.

You should keep it.

As souvenir.

That way,
I can keep track of you.

Hello.

Come in.
Just finishing up.

Fix us
a couple of drinks.

I think we've earned them.

I guess
it's business as usual now.

Back to how things were.

Politics being what they are.

You feeling okay?

So, what now?

Mission accomplished?

Head back to Russia?

Something like this.

Yes.

You?

New York.

Almost forgot.

Got something for you.

You know
what my mission is?

Same as mine was.

Kill me if necessary...

To get that.

Absolutely hated
working with you, Peril.

You're a terrible spy,
cowboy.

Good evening,
gentlemen.

Rather touching scene.

Nice view,
glass of whiskey,

and a little bonfire
to keep you warm.

Rather good idea.

So I have news.

A fresh little unpleasantness
has arisen.

But I've spoken
to your superiors,

and now that we're all
such good friends,

they've kindly agreed

to let me keep the team together
for a while.

We leave in an hour.

Where we going?

Istanbul, Kuryakin.

You'll need
your curlywurly shoes.

Oh, and you have
a new code name.

A code name?

Yes, rather a good one:
U.N.C.L.E.