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1
00:00:02,183 --> 00:00:05,330
(Shawn)
'One thousand
nine hundred and ninety nine.'
2
00:00:05,660 --> 00:00:06,183
Two thousand.
3
00:00:06,216 --> 00:00:09,183
"I love you."
4
00:00:21,500 --> 00:00:23,300
Yeah, hello, Lisa?
Hey, baby, come over.
5
00:00:23,333 --> 00:00:25,166
I've been workin'
on somethin' all mornin'.
6
00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:27,830
I got a surprise for you, girl.
7
00:00:27,116 --> 00:00:29,233
Alright, see you
in a minute. Buh-bye.
8
00:00:33,183 --> 00:00:34,350
Hey, Shawn.
9
00:00:34,383 --> 00:00:37,366
[dominos rattling]
10
00:00:46,283 --> 00:00:47,316
Aw.
11
00:00:47,350 --> 00:00:50,216
I love you, too, Shawn.
12
00:00:53,100 --> 00:00:55,133
[theme song]
13
00:00:56,150 --> 00:00:57,383
♪ We're brothers ♪
14
00:00:58,160 --> 00:00:59,266
♪ We're happy
and we're singin' ♪
15
00:00:59,300 --> 00:01:01,200
♪ And we're colored ♪
16
00:01:02,250 --> 00:01:04,316
♪ Give me a high-five ♪
17
00:01:04,350 --> 00:01:07,830
(male #1)
'Alright, cut and print.
Beautiful, guys.'
18
00:01:07,116 --> 00:01:08,383
'Dynamite. That is..'
19
00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:11,283
♪ Girl what you got
goin' on tonight? ♪
20
00:01:11,316 --> 00:01:14,660
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
21
00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:16,216
♪ Won't you just chill
with me tonight ♪
22
00:01:16,250 --> 00:01:18,333
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
23
00:01:18,366 --> 00:01:21,116
♪ Girl what you got
going on tonight? ♪
24
00:01:21,150 --> 00:01:23,116
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
25
00:01:23,150 --> 00:01:26,330
♪ Won't you just chill
with me tonight ♪
26
00:01:26,660 --> 00:01:28,500
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪
27
00:01:28,830 --> 00:01:29,300
♪ I got something
that you gonna like ♪♪
28
00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:39,500
for work and Mr.
Clotworthy
is gonna kill me.
29
00:01:39,830 --> 00:01:41,283
Oh, don't worry, about it,
I'll catch you a cab.
30
00:01:41,316 --> 00:01:43,350
Back up off the curb, please.
Thank you.
31
00:01:45,300 --> 00:01:47,183
[shouting]
Taxi!
32
00:01:50,250 --> 00:01:52,000
Taxi!
33
00:01:52,330 --> 00:01:53,133
Hey, boy, come here!
34
00:01:53,166 --> 00:01:54,366
You'll never
catch
no cab like that
35
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:56,660
screaming like a maniac.
36
00:01:56,100 --> 00:01:58,000
You oughta show some class.
37
00:01:58,330 --> 00:01:59,150
Watch.
38
00:02:00,660 --> 00:02:01,500
Here.
39
00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:02,266
Taxi?
40
00:02:05,150 --> 00:02:07,200
[clears throat]
41
00:02:07,233 --> 00:02:08,350
Taxi?
42
00:02:09,383 --> 00:02:11,200
[clears throat]
Pardon me.
43
00:02:11,233 --> 00:02:13,366
Would you happen to have
some Grey Poupon?
44
00:02:16,233 --> 00:02:18,660
I don't believe this, man.
45
00:02:18,100 --> 00:02:20,316
What does it take for a
brother
to catch a cab around here?
46
00:02:20,350 --> 00:02:22,266
What's he gotta do, lie down
in the middle of the street
47
00:02:22,300 --> 00:02:24,216
and hope
a cab don't run him
over?
48
00:02:24,250 --> 00:02:27,150
I know, right?
49
00:02:27,183 --> 00:02:29,116
Hey, Marlon, why don't you lie
down in the middle of the
street
50
00:02:29,150 --> 00:02:31,150
and hope this next
cab
don't run you over?
51
00:02:31,183 --> 00:02:32,333
I bet.
52
00:02:36,116 --> 00:02:37,250
[tires screeching]
53
00:02:37,283 --> 00:02:39,160
Oh, Lord!
54
00:02:40,266 --> 00:02:41,316
Thanks, kid!
55
00:02:41,350 --> 00:02:43,116
You got it, baby.
56
00:02:43,150 --> 00:02:45,133
Alright, let's buckle up
in there!
57
00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:47,366
Keep him safe.
Fifty-five. Stay alive!
58
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,133
Mo-ove out, baby.
59
00:02:49,166 --> 00:02:50,350
Let's go!
60
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:54,200
[instrumental music]
61
00:02:57,250 --> 00:03:00,330
Hey, pops,
I'm sorry I'm late,
man
62
00:03:00,660 --> 00:03:02,116
but you ain't gonna
believe
what happened.
63
00:03:02,150 --> 00:03:04,316
I got abducted by some aliens.
64
00:03:05,316 --> 00:03:07,160
- Really?
- Yeah.
65
00:03:07,500 --> 00:03:08,330
This is the third time this week
66
00:03:08,660 --> 00:03:10,166
you've been abducted by aliens.
67
00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:11,300
Well, they sure make
a lot of trips to come
68
00:03:11,333 --> 00:03:13,166
and see you, don't they?
69
00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:15,350
- Yeah, you tellin' me?
- You know what I'mma do?
70
00:03:15,383 --> 00:03:19,330
I'm gonna deduct it
from your pay.
71
00:03:19,660 --> 00:03:21,150
See, pop, that's wrong,
you don't deduct Benny's
pay
72
00:03:21,183 --> 00:03:24,200
when he takes
off
for Yom Kippur.
73
00:03:24,233 --> 00:03:26,333
You think I need trouble
with the Jewish Defense League
74
00:03:26,366 --> 00:03:29,250
off up in here?
75
00:03:29,283 --> 00:03:32,266
Now get in the kitchen
and scrape the grill clean.
76
00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:34,216
You know, you ain't too old
to get spanked.
77
00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:35,316
[both laughing]
78
00:03:35,350 --> 00:03:37,500
Pop, how you gonna
play me like that
79
00:03:37,830 --> 00:03:38,216
in front of people, man.
80
00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:41,250
I'll take them
pants down right
now.
81
00:03:41,283 --> 00:03:43,300
Somebody hand me an egg beater.
82
00:03:50,366 --> 00:03:53,160
See, this ain't
even right, Benny.
83
00:03:53,500 --> 00:03:57,160
See, pops is keeping
the black man down.
84
00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:58,100
Fight the power!
85
00:03:58,133 --> 00:04:00,150
No justice, no peace!
86
00:04:00,183 --> 00:04:01,266
And free Mike Tyson.
87
00:04:01,300 --> 00:04:04,250
As-salamu alaykum,
88
00:04:04,283 --> 00:04:06,266
[instrumental music]
89
00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:11,160
Marlon, I had a bad day.
Don't talk to me.
90
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:14,166
And I don't even wanna see
your lopsided pumpkin-head.
91
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:15,266
You hear me?
92
00:04:16,216 --> 00:04:18,233
Marlon, are you home?
93
00:04:20,500 --> 00:04:23,160
Well, good, then.
That's how I wanted it,
anyway.
94
00:04:24,350 --> 00:04:28,660
Yo, Shawn, my day was whack.
I don't wanna hear from you.
95
00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:30,116
I don't wanna see that
little
pretty-girl face of yours.
96
00:04:30,150 --> 00:04:32,160
- You understand me?
- I hear you.
97
00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:33,200
[screams]
98
00:04:34,250 --> 00:04:36,266
I didn't even know
you was here, B.
99
00:04:38,183 --> 00:04:40,266
Hey! That's the last root beer.
100
00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:42,133
Come on, man, you know
I always drink root beer
101
00:04:42,166 --> 00:04:44,330
when I have a bad day.
102
00:04:44,660 --> 00:04:45,183
Come on, man, get
off!
That's mine.
103
00:04:45,216 --> 00:04:46,216
- No, you get off!
- Get off!
104
00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:47,250
- You get off.
- Let go.
105
00:04:47,283 --> 00:04:48,283
- You let go.
- Let go!
106
00:04:48,316 --> 00:04:49,350
- You let go.
- Let go.
107
00:04:49,383 --> 00:04:51,200
- Let go.
- Alright.
108
00:04:51,233 --> 00:04:53,160
On three,
we'll both let
go.
109
00:04:53,500 --> 00:04:55,216
Whoever had the worst day
gets to drink the root
beer.
110
00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,330
- Okay?
- Okay.
111
00:04:57,660 --> 00:04:59,216
(both)
One, two, three.
112
00:05:02,266 --> 00:05:04,830
Alright, let go, just together.
113
00:05:04,116 --> 00:05:06,183
- One, two, three.
- One, two, three. Hands up.
114
00:05:06,216 --> 00:05:08,300
Hands in the air
like you're gettin'
arrested.
115
00:05:10,133 --> 00:05:12,660
- Okay.
- Okay.
116
00:05:12,100 --> 00:05:13,383
- Alright.
- Cool.
117
00:05:16,283 --> 00:05:17,366
Today at work
118
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:19,216
pops threatened
to pull down my pants
119
00:05:19,250 --> 00:05:22,316
and spank me in front
of the whole entire
restaurant.
120
00:05:22,350 --> 00:05:25,366
- Wow, that ain't right.
- Mm-hmm.
121
00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,233
I mean, you're his employee.
122
00:05:27,266 --> 00:05:29,166
He should treat
you
with respect.
123
00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:31,366
Yeah, I know,
I guess I'm just a busboy.
124
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,216
Marlon, don't talk like that.
125
00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:36,660
Haven't I taught you
anything
about self-respect,
stupid?
126
00:05:37,350 --> 00:05:39,250
Remember that time
when pops was coaching you
127
00:05:39,283 --> 00:05:41,660
in Little League?
128
00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:43,233
Yeah, he used to tell me
I play like a girl
129
00:05:43,266 --> 00:05:44,316
until that one day
130
00:05:44,350 --> 00:05:46,300
I caught that line drive
right in my mouth.
131
00:05:46,333 --> 00:05:48,166
[grunting]
132
00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:50,660
Yeah, you had teeth
like Leon Spinks
133
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:52,250
but pops respected
you afterwards.
134
00:05:52,283 --> 00:05:54,366
Yeah, yeah, man.
135
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:56,283
See, you need to go tell pop
136
00:05:56,316 --> 00:05:58,660
to give you
the respect you
deserve
137
00:05:58,100 --> 00:05:59,100
'cause you're an adult
138
00:05:59,133 --> 00:06:00,166
and you have a job to do.
139
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,660
Yeah! I'm an adult
with a job.
140
00:06:03,100 --> 00:06:05,250
- Who buses those tables, who?
- I do.
141
00:06:05,283 --> 00:06:07,166
Who jumps up and down
in the dumpster
142
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,216
to flatten out the garbage?
143
00:06:08,250 --> 00:06:09,266
- Who?
- I do.
144
00:06:09,300 --> 00:06:12,660
And who crawls through
the air shaft
145
00:06:12,100 --> 00:06:13,166
to clean out the dead rats
146
00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:16,116
before the health inspector
comes, who?
147
00:06:16,150 --> 00:06:18,166
I do.
148
00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:20,333
See, you're not worthless, man.
149
00:06:20,366 --> 00:06:23,300
- Yeah. I am somebody.
- That's right.
150
00:06:23,333 --> 00:06:25,383
See, what you need, brother..
151
00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:28,150
...is self...respect..
152
00:06:28,183 --> 00:06:30,160
...not self neglect.
153
00:06:30,500 --> 00:06:32,000
Oh, preach on, brother.
154
00:06:32,330 --> 00:06:34,316
You need...in-spiration.
155
00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:37,500
- Mm-hmm.
- Nothumiliation!
156
00:06:37,830 --> 00:06:38,333
Ha ha! Amen, Lord!
157
00:06:38,366 --> 00:06:42,830
You need to be treated
with dignity and class
158
00:06:42,116 --> 00:06:45,160
not to be hit with a brush
on your ass!
159
00:06:46,150 --> 00:06:47,183
Oh, I'm gettin' the spirit.
160
00:06:47,216 --> 00:06:48,200
[mumbling]
161
00:06:48,233 --> 00:06:50,660
I rebuke you, brother!
162
00:06:50,100 --> 00:06:52,160
I rebuke you!
163
00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:53,250
And I tell you..
164
00:06:53,283 --> 00:06:55,160
I tell you to go to pop
165
00:06:55,500 --> 00:06:57,116
and get your respect
you deserve!
166
00:06:57,150 --> 00:06:58,200
- That's right!
- That's right!
167
00:06:58,233 --> 00:06:59,333
I'mma do it!
168
00:06:59,366 --> 00:07:01,200
I'mma go to pop
and I'mma get my
respect!
169
00:07:01,233 --> 00:07:03,333
- Keep hope alive.
- Keep the pope alive!
170
00:07:03,366 --> 00:07:06,330
No, keep hope alive!
171
00:07:06,660 --> 00:07:08,000
Uh, keep Bob Hope alive!
172
00:07:08,330 --> 00:07:09,233
- Keep hope alive!
- Oh, uh..
173
00:07:09,266 --> 00:07:11,333
O.J. was on the phone. Five!
174
00:07:11,366 --> 00:07:13,830
Keep hope alive!
175
00:07:13,116 --> 00:07:15,330
A.C. helped him drive!
176
00:07:15,660 --> 00:07:16,660
Keep hope alive!
177
00:07:16,100 --> 00:07:18,366
Uh, Mike Tyson
gets out in
'95!
178
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,250
Keep hope alive!
179
00:07:21,350 --> 00:07:23,000
Ah!
180
00:07:23,330 --> 00:07:25,660
Nobody messes with my root beer.
181
00:07:27,160 --> 00:07:29,330
Thank you. Keep the pope alive!
182
00:07:32,166 --> 00:07:34,250
Thank you kindly. Come again.
183
00:07:34,283 --> 00:07:36,283
[laughs]
184
00:07:36,316 --> 00:07:39,200
Look, pops,
I need to talk to you.
185
00:07:39,233 --> 00:07:42,216
- I got customers.
- I don't care what you got.
186
00:07:42,250 --> 00:07:45,150
Look here, pops.
I demand respect from
you.
187
00:07:45,183 --> 00:07:47,116
- I do respect you.
- Good.
188
00:07:47,150 --> 00:07:49,383
Now, go clean the vomit
in the bathroom.
189
00:07:51,383 --> 00:07:54,116
Did you even hear what I said?
190
00:07:54,150 --> 00:07:55,300
What?
191
00:07:55,333 --> 00:07:57,830
Come on, pop, man.
192
00:07:57,116 --> 00:07:59,316
Look, I know I'm late a lot,
but I work hard for you.
193
00:07:59,350 --> 00:08:01,333
Hard? You think this is hard?
194
00:08:01,366 --> 00:08:04,166
- Yeah.
- This ain't hard, young man.
195
00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:05,316
You try gettin' up
at 4 in the mornin'
196
00:08:05,350 --> 00:08:07,830
goin' down in a deep hole
197
00:08:07,116 --> 00:08:08,283
breathin' toxic dust
198
00:08:08,316 --> 00:08:10,166
carryin' hundreds of
pounds
of rocks on your back
199
00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:12,366
day after day
after day after
day.
200
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,330
You did that, pop?
201
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:15,250
Hell no!
202
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,266
That's coal
mining,
but that's hard.
203
00:08:19,300 --> 00:08:21,233
See, you have no
idea
how hard it is
204
00:08:21,266 --> 00:08:23,183
out there in the real world.
205
00:08:23,216 --> 00:08:27,200
Oh, really? Well, maybe
I just need to find out.
206
00:08:27,233 --> 00:08:29,116
I
207
00:08:30,333 --> 00:08:31,366
What did you say?
208
00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:33,200
You heard me.
209
00:08:33,233 --> 00:08:36,660
I
210
00:08:36,100 --> 00:08:40,100
That's right.
Hasta la vista,
baby.
211
00:08:40,133 --> 00:08:42,383
That's right, I'm out that
door
and I'm never comin' back.
212
00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:45,366
I'm out there
to make me a fortune,
Mister..
213
00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:48,200
...Butterfly Collar.
214
00:08:48,233 --> 00:08:52,183
That's right. Now, who's gonna
clean up your little vomit now?
215
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,250
Benny, come here,
I got a job for you.
216
00:09:02,830 --> 00:09:04,300
[instrumental music]
217
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:07,660
[groans]
218
00:09:09,166 --> 00:09:11,266
Oy, vey!
219
00:09:11,300 --> 00:09:13,116
[groans]
220
00:09:13,150 --> 00:09:15,350
Shawn, you'll never
guess
what happened.
221
00:09:15,383 --> 00:09:17,183
I know, I know,
I talked to pops.
222
00:09:17,216 --> 00:09:18,316
Look, G, I'm sorry.
223
00:09:18,350 --> 00:09:20,500
I didn't know
when I told you to stand up
224
00:09:20,830 --> 00:09:21,200
for yourself,
you'd quit your job.
225
00:09:21,233 --> 00:09:24,216
[blowing a raspberry]
Oh, pops schmops.
226
00:09:24,250 --> 00:09:26,383
- Everything worked out fine,
G.
- Really?
227
00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:28,266
Yeah, you'll never guess
what your little brother
228
00:09:28,300 --> 00:09:30,350
been up to, Shawn.
Come on, come with me, G.
229
00:09:30,383 --> 00:09:32,300
- Wait, hold on! Marlon!
- Come on.
230
00:09:33,233 --> 00:09:35,100
[instrumental music]
231
00:09:36,133 --> 00:09:38,300
What the hell is this?
232
00:09:38,333 --> 00:09:41,830
Grandma's old car.
233
00:09:41,116 --> 00:09:44,233
Why does it have
Lionel Richie's old afro on
top?
234
00:09:44,266 --> 00:09:47,350
Well, you know how black people
can't catch a cab in this city.
235
00:09:47,383 --> 00:09:49,116
Well, they can now.
236
00:09:49,150 --> 00:09:50,200
Introducin'..
237
00:09:50,233 --> 00:09:52,133
...Afro Pick-You-Up.
238
00:09:52,166 --> 00:09:56,330
A cab company
exclusively
for the brotherman..
239
00:09:56,660 --> 00:09:57,133
...not..
240
00:09:57,166 --> 00:09:59,330
...the other man.
241
00:10:09,366 --> 00:10:11,300
It's a little dry.
242
00:10:11,333 --> 00:10:13,333
Moisture on this brothers.
243
00:10:24,100 --> 00:10:26,383
I'll have a small green salad.
244
00:10:28,233 --> 00:10:31,200
No dressing, no croutons..
245
00:10:31,233 --> 00:10:33,316
...and a lemon wedge
on the side.
246
00:10:34,333 --> 00:10:37,316
[laughing]
247
00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:42,250
Man, who are you kidding?
248
00:10:42,283 --> 00:10:45,283
Benny, give me three hamburgers,
everything on it.
249
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:49,830
Piece of cheese cake
and a chocolate malt.
250
00:10:50,330 --> 00:10:51,830
Hey, thanks, pops.
251
00:10:51,116 --> 00:10:53,133
You ain't gotta fake it
in here, brother.
252
00:10:55,316 --> 00:10:57,350
What's wrong with you?
253
00:10:57,383 --> 00:10:59,366
That pit bull
Clotworthy
is killin' me.
254
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:02,830
I've been workin' double
shifts,
I feel like a dead man
255
00:11:02,116 --> 00:11:04,330
I haven't seen Lisa all week.
256
00:11:04,660 --> 00:11:06,100
Boy, pops, I tell you,
this is hard.
257
00:11:06,133 --> 00:11:08,383
Hard? You don't know hard.
258
00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,150
Hard is feeling your way
through a burning building.
259
00:11:11,183 --> 00:11:12,266
Grabbing a cryin' kid
260
00:11:12,300 --> 00:11:14,166
and tossin' him across
your shoulders.
261
00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:15,300
Runnin' down
three flights of stairs
262
00:11:15,333 --> 00:11:17,283
with the, with the smoke
burning your eyes
263
00:11:17,316 --> 00:11:19,366
and the flames
licking your boots.
264
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:21,830
Pops, you did that?
265
00:11:21,116 --> 00:11:22,366
Hell no!
266
00:11:24,660 --> 00:11:25,233
That's firefighting
267
00:11:25,266 --> 00:11:27,330
but that's hard.
268
00:11:27,660 --> 00:11:30,660
You sure know a lot about jobs
you've never done.
269
00:11:30,100 --> 00:11:33,830
I know enough not to be
a coal miner or a
firefighter.
270
00:11:34,183 --> 00:11:38,330
Well, look what
the cat dragged in!
271
00:11:38,660 --> 00:11:40,166
Aha! Hello, little people.
272
00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,366
Come to get your job back,
huh, Marlon?
273
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:47,330
[laughing]
274
00:11:47,660 --> 00:11:48,250
I laugh at you, old man.
275
00:11:48,283 --> 00:11:51,100
You and your little
trailer park friends.
276
00:11:53,150 --> 00:11:54,383
So what did you come here for?
277
00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:57,300
I'm rich, baby,
I just came to flaunt it.
278
00:11:57,333 --> 00:12:01,133
You mean, people actually ride
around that Afro-Amero of
yours?
279
00:12:01,166 --> 00:12:04,000
Riding and tipping.
280
00:12:05,830 --> 00:12:07,250
All that from the cab?
281
00:12:07,283 --> 00:12:10,333
Affirmative.
You know, you laughed at me.
282
00:12:10,366 --> 00:12:12,183
That was a bad move.
283
00:12:12,216 --> 00:12:14,116
Here you go.
284
00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:15,366
Hey, Benny.
285
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,133
Here's a couple of bucks.
286
00:12:17,166 --> 00:12:19,116
Go buy yourself
some of that cologne you like
287
00:12:19,150 --> 00:12:21,316
that, uh, Hai Karate.
288
00:12:21,350 --> 00:12:25,000
Who would have believed your
brother would become a success?
289
00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:27,366
Look like I owe your
mama
50 bucks.
290
00:12:31,100 --> 00:12:33,000
Guess what, Marlon,
after you left the
diner
291
00:12:33,330 --> 00:12:35,100
I started to think about
how successful you are.
292
00:12:35,133 --> 00:12:37,266
So I called up my boss
and I told him somethin'
293
00:12:37,300 --> 00:12:40,150
I should've told him
a long time ago.
294
00:12:40,183 --> 00:12:41,350
You told him
you and Lisa knocked boots
295
00:12:41,383 --> 00:12:44,160
in the back of the truck?
296
00:12:44,500 --> 00:12:45,283
No, G, I quit my job.
297
00:12:45,316 --> 00:12:48,100
I'm joinin' the Afro
Pick-You-Up service with you.
298
00:12:48,133 --> 00:12:50,383
- Youwhat?
- Yeah, kid, yo!
299
00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:52,366
You'd be real proud of me, man.
300
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,133
I called my boss
straight up and I said
301
00:12:55,166 --> 00:12:57,000
"Look, Mr. Clotworthy
302
00:12:57,330 --> 00:12:59,150
"you miserable, Bengay-smellin'
303
00:12:59,183 --> 00:13:03,000
"toupee-wearin', ignorant bum
304
00:13:03,330 --> 00:13:04,233
"I...quit!
305
00:13:04,266 --> 00:13:05,266
"Heh, that's right.
306
00:13:05,300 --> 00:13:07,116
'"Say goodbye to the best thing'
307
00:13:07,150 --> 00:13:08,233
"that ever happened to this
308
00:13:08,266 --> 00:13:11,330
doo-doo brown suit company. Ha!"
309
00:13:11,660 --> 00:13:14,500
Shawn, you shouldn't have
done that, man.
310
00:13:14,830 --> 00:13:16,830
Why not, G?
I'm your brother,
man.
311
00:13:16,116 --> 00:13:19,160
Don't get greedy,
share the wealth.
312
00:13:19,500 --> 00:13:20,500
You want me to share the wealth?
313
00:13:20,830 --> 00:13:22,133
- Yeah.
- Alright, fine.
314
00:13:22,166 --> 00:13:25,316
Here's everything I earned
with my cab business.
315
00:13:25,350 --> 00:13:28,383
A marble, a Buffalo
nickel
and a tooth?
316
00:13:30,300 --> 00:13:33,160
But in the diner
you told pop you were rich.
317
00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:34,200
Yeah, well,
I just wanted to make him
318
00:13:34,233 --> 00:13:35,283
look bad in front of Benny.
319
00:13:35,316 --> 00:13:38,830
God, man, what am I
gonna do now?
320
00:13:38,116 --> 00:13:42,830
Gosh! I'm never gonna find a
job
as good as the one at APS.
321
00:13:42,116 --> 00:13:43,366
What am I gonna do?
322
00:13:45,660 --> 00:13:48,330
You can go into the cab
business
with me.
323
00:13:48,660 --> 00:13:51,000
Boy, you didn't make two
cents.
How you gonna say that?
324
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:53,000
Well, that's 'cause I didn't
have my college-educated
325
00:13:53,330 --> 00:13:54,200
big brother with me.
326
00:13:54,233 --> 00:13:56,500
Yeah, well, I mean..
327
00:13:56,830 --> 00:13:59,200
I am the one in the family
with all the business smarts.
328
00:13:59,233 --> 00:14:02,233
I have always wanted to open up
my own company.
329
00:14:02,266 --> 00:14:04,183
See? Just think, Shawn.
330
00:14:04,216 --> 00:14:06,116
This is our destiny, baby.
331
00:14:06,150 --> 00:14:07,166
Me and you..
332
00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:10,300
...entrepreneurs.
333
00:14:10,333 --> 00:14:13,166
You know what? I think you got
a point there, little brother.
334
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:15,150
I mean, with my brains..
335
00:14:15,183 --> 00:14:16,233
...and your..
336
00:14:16,266 --> 00:14:18,250
[laughing]
337
00:14:18,283 --> 00:14:20,250
...and your car..
338
00:14:20,283 --> 00:14:22,183
...we can go nationwide.
339
00:14:22,216 --> 00:14:24,330
Yes!
340
00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:25,100
There you go, partner.
341
00:14:25,133 --> 00:14:27,216
- Yes!
- Let's go get paid!
342
00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:33,660
[Spanish music on stereo]
343
00:14:33,100 --> 00:14:35,300
[singing in Spanish]
344
00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:45,333
[turns off radio]
345
00:14:45,366 --> 00:14:48,250
[speaking in foreign language]
346
00:14:48,283 --> 00:14:51,500
Si, el stupido.
347
00:14:51,830 --> 00:14:52,166
We've been riding around
for three hours
348
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,333
and no customers.
349
00:14:54,366 --> 00:14:57,183
That's 'cause we ain't go
where the black people are.
350
00:14:57,216 --> 00:14:58,250
Marlon, we're in Harlem.
351
00:14:58,283 --> 00:15:01,333
Where you wanna go Zimbabwe?
352
00:15:01,366 --> 00:15:03,133
Well, look,
let's just forget
about
353
00:15:03,166 --> 00:15:04,266
all the brothers and sisters
354
00:15:04,300 --> 00:15:06,133
and let's just go
pick up anybody.
355
00:15:06,166 --> 00:15:09,250
Need I remind you that
the idea of Afro Pick-You-Up
356
00:15:09,283 --> 00:15:11,250
is to pick up the brotherman
357
00:15:11,283 --> 00:15:14,183
not the other man?
358
00:15:14,216 --> 00:15:15,316
Need I remind you
359
00:15:15,350 --> 00:15:17,283
that we're two broke,
jobless brothers
360
00:15:17,316 --> 00:15:20,660
ridin' around
in a four-door Afro?
361
00:15:22,350 --> 00:15:25,000
Let's go try over
by the port
authority.
362
00:15:26,166 --> 00:15:30,330
Look out, Midtown,
we're crossing over, dudes!
363
00:15:30,660 --> 00:15:31,216
'Whoa!'
364
00:15:31,250 --> 00:15:33,300
Oh, look, there's a guy over
there. Let's pick him up.
365
00:15:33,333 --> 00:15:36,116
[screaming]
366
00:15:37,316 --> 00:15:40,366
Hey, Mr.
Executive,
where to, fella?
367
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:42,316
Nowhere. I'm, I'm fine.
368
00:15:42,350 --> 00:15:44,366
Oh, come on in, Caucasoid.
369
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,350
We're a legitimate cab company.
370
00:15:46,383 --> 00:15:49,160
Here. Here's our ID.
371
00:15:53,183 --> 00:15:55,333
No, thanks, I'm, I'm fine.
372
00:15:55,366 --> 00:15:57,100
I know what you're thinking.
373
00:15:57,133 --> 00:15:59,266
You're thinking,
"Two black guys
374
00:15:59,300 --> 00:16:02,166
"in a cab with an afro on top?
375
00:16:02,200 --> 00:16:05,133
Come on, not my cup of tea."
376
00:16:05,166 --> 00:16:06,350
Look here, once you go black
377
00:16:06,383 --> 00:16:09,830
you'll never go back.
378
00:16:09,116 --> 00:16:10,266
No, really,
I-I'm not interested.
379
00:16:10,300 --> 00:16:12,660
Come on, man, just get in.
380
00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:13,233
Hey, we even got
an old "Jet" magazine
381
00:16:13,266 --> 00:16:15,116
with Lola Falana
as the centerfold.
382
00:16:15,150 --> 00:16:18,300
You remember her from those
hilarious "Bob Hope" specials?
383
00:16:18,333 --> 00:16:20,283
Look, I-I'm not
getting in the car.
384
00:16:20,316 --> 00:16:22,160
So just leave me alone, alright?
385
00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:24,830
You're gonna get inside the cab.
386
00:16:25,366 --> 00:16:28,116
- Get up in here.
- Alright.
387
00:16:28,150 --> 00:16:30,350
- So where to?
- Nowhere!
388
00:16:30,383 --> 00:16:33,150
I live here, you idiots!
389
00:16:33,183 --> 00:16:34,366
- Oh!
- Okay.
390
00:16:36,366 --> 00:16:38,116
Sorry about that!
391
00:16:38,150 --> 00:16:39,133
Oh, man!
392
00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:41,283
He stole our "Jet" magazine!
393
00:16:41,316 --> 00:16:43,330
Man, I tell you,
those white guys
394
00:16:43,660 --> 00:16:45,283
sure do love them
some Lola Falanas.
395
00:16:45,316 --> 00:16:47,366
Hey, look,
that dude over there need a
cab.
396
00:16:54,183 --> 00:16:55,250
So, mister, where to?
397
00:16:55,283 --> 00:16:57,116
Take me
to the World Trade Center
398
00:16:57,150 --> 00:16:59,133
and step on it!
399
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:02,830
Yes, sir.
400
00:17:02,116 --> 00:17:03,233
[engine cranking]
401
00:17:03,266 --> 00:17:04,300
[clock ticking]
402
00:17:04,333 --> 00:17:06,160
[sighs]
403
00:17:07,133 --> 00:17:08,233
Hey.
404
00:17:08,266 --> 00:17:10,000
What's that noise?
405
00:17:10,330 --> 00:17:11,366
I don't know.
406
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:13,500
Hey, you hear that, mister?
407
00:17:13,830 --> 00:17:15,216
What, that loud ticking?
408
00:17:15,250 --> 00:17:17,330
Yeah.
409
00:17:17,660 --> 00:17:19,100
No. No. I don't hear anything.
410
00:17:20,250 --> 00:17:21,366
[sighs]
411
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:23,150
Shawn, it's such
a beautiful night.
412
00:17:23,183 --> 00:17:25,116
Let's take
the long scenic route.
413
00:17:25,150 --> 00:17:26,383
Oh, no, no. No scenic route.
414
00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:29,200
I'm in a big hurry.
415
00:17:29,233 --> 00:17:31,283
- Hey, the ticking stopped.
- Good.
416
00:17:32,250 --> 00:17:34,200
Oh, no! Stop the car!
417
00:17:34,233 --> 00:17:36,300
- Let me out now!
- No. Hey, not here, G.
418
00:17:36,333 --> 00:17:38,383
- This is a bad neighborhood.
- I don't care. Let me out.
419
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:40,366
This isn't
a good neighborhood, man!
420
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,283
(male #1)
'What did my people do?
I can't believe it!'
421
00:17:42,316 --> 00:17:44,250
Hey! That guy forgot to pay us.
422
00:17:44,283 --> 00:17:46,266
- 'Oh, no!'
- Ah, don't worry about it.
423
00:17:46,300 --> 00:17:48,100
- You know what I always say.
- 'Mm-hmm.'
424
00:17:48,133 --> 00:17:51,383
(both)
What goes around, comes around.
425
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:54,133
[explosion]
426
00:18:04,830 --> 00:18:05,333
Four hours of nothin'.
427
00:18:05,366 --> 00:18:07,830
This is never gonna work, G.
428
00:18:07,116 --> 00:18:09,830
I'm going back to beg
for my old job back.
429
00:18:09,116 --> 00:18:11,200
What? You're gonna quit?
430
00:18:11,233 --> 00:18:14,660
Come on, man, pop didn't raise
no quitters, Shawn.
431
00:18:14,100 --> 00:18:15,150
You know how we always say
432
00:18:15,183 --> 00:18:16,333
"When the tough gets goin'
433
00:18:16,366 --> 00:18:19,166
you gotta kill
two birds with one stone."
434
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:23,266
What do you say?
435
00:18:23,300 --> 00:18:27,116
Onward, white man, ho!
436
00:18:32,316 --> 00:18:34,133
Where to, sir?
437
00:18:34,166 --> 00:18:39,000
Going to see Cath
just one more time?
438
00:18:39,330 --> 00:18:42,233
Goin' home to watch
some re-runs of "Hee Haw?"
439
00:18:42,266 --> 00:18:44,500
Shut your freaking mouth
440
00:18:44,830 --> 00:18:46,333
and mind your own
freakin' business.
441
00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:50,233
New Yorkers are
so freakin' rude.
442
00:18:51,266 --> 00:18:53,216
Oh, I got your freakin' rude.
443
00:18:53,250 --> 00:18:55,366
- Aah!
- Oh! Oh, my God!
444
00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,350
- He's got a freakin' gun!
- Oh!
445
00:18:58,383 --> 00:19:00,366
Shut the freak up!
446
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:04,160
And drive me to freakin' Canada.
447
00:19:06,250 --> 00:19:09,350
Shawn, Canada,
that's 300 miles!
448
00:19:09,383 --> 00:19:11,150
Somethin' like that.
449
00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:14,330
We're rich.
We're rollin' in dough, baby!
450
00:19:14,660 --> 00:19:17,160
♪ We're in the money
we're in the money ♪♪
451
00:19:17,500 --> 00:19:20,133
I'm not payin' you,
you freakin' moron!
452
00:19:20,166 --> 00:19:22,300
Will you shut up?
You're gonna get us killed!
453
00:19:22,333 --> 00:19:25,150
You're the one that wanted
to pick a white guy.
454
00:19:25,183 --> 00:19:26,166
Alright!
455
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:28,216
That's freakin' it! Get out!
456
00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:29,350
What the freak
are you talkin' about?
457
00:19:29,383 --> 00:19:31,333
We're in the middle
of the freakin' street!
458
00:19:31,366 --> 00:19:34,300
Get out of the freakin' car!
459
00:19:34,333 --> 00:19:36,116
[both screaming]
460
00:19:36,150 --> 00:19:37,366
[tires screeching]
461
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,183
[cars honking]
462
00:19:41,216 --> 00:19:43,500
Now, that's better.
463
00:19:44,366 --> 00:19:46,166
[screaming]
464
00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:48,500
[crashes]
465
00:19:48,830 --> 00:19:49,300
[instrumental music]
466
00:19:49,333 --> 00:19:52,250
Damn! I'm all freaked out.
467
00:19:52,283 --> 00:19:55,660
Man, that was
a freakin'
nightmare.
468
00:19:55,100 --> 00:19:57,266
Yo, Benny,
where's pops?
469
00:19:57,300 --> 00:19:59,166
Homeboy's chilling
in the basement.
470
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:01,366
Could you go down there
and get him, please?
471
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:05,000
[speaking in foreign language]
472
00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:09,316
I gotta call my boss
and beg for my job back.
473
00:20:12,316 --> 00:20:14,250
Yeah, hello, Mr. Clotworthy?
474
00:20:14,283 --> 00:20:16,116
Yeah, it's me, Shawn.
475
00:20:16,150 --> 00:20:18,266
I'm just callin' because
I heard somebody called you up
476
00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:21,350
pretending to be me
layin' a lot of insults on
you.
477
00:20:21,383 --> 00:20:23,350
I just wanna let you know
that I would never say
478
00:20:23,383 --> 00:20:26,500
nothin' like that.
Oh, I love my job.
479
00:20:26,830 --> 00:20:28,250
I would never even
dream about quittin'.
480
00:20:28,283 --> 00:20:32,250
He said what? I would never
say that you wear atoupee.
481
00:20:32,283 --> 00:20:35,300
I mean, everyone knows
you wear hair plugs.
482
00:20:35,333 --> 00:20:38,133
It's obvious.
I mean, they're an inch
apart.
483
00:20:39,300 --> 00:20:41,116
Okay. Alright, then.
484
00:20:41,150 --> 00:20:42,383
Well, then,
I'll see you on Monday.
485
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,316
Alright, then. Peace. Take care.
486
00:20:45,350 --> 00:20:47,500
What are you boys doing here?
487
00:20:47,830 --> 00:20:48,316
Hey! What's up, pop?
488
00:20:48,350 --> 00:20:50,366
Let me help you with that.
489
00:20:52,166 --> 00:20:53,383
You know, pop, I was thinkin'.
490
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,383
Although I love bein' on my
own
and makin' all my money
491
00:20:57,160 --> 00:20:58,233
I think it's better that..
492
00:20:58,266 --> 00:21:00,830
...I be back here with you.
493
00:21:00,116 --> 00:21:03,333
O-oh! The taxicab business
went bust, huh?
494
00:21:03,366 --> 00:21:07,200
Yeah. I guess it's harder
than
I thought in the real
world.
495
00:21:09,330 --> 00:21:10,133
Welcome home, son.
496
00:21:10,166 --> 00:21:12,000
- Thank you, pop.
- 'Wait a minute.'
497
00:21:12,330 --> 00:21:14,150
Hold up, hold up, before
y'all get all lovey-dovey.
498
00:21:14,183 --> 00:21:16,316
Pops, Marlon is not comin'
back
to work for you
499
00:21:16,350 --> 00:21:18,283
until you treat him
like an adult.
500
00:21:18,316 --> 00:21:20,283
Don't worry,
I'mma treat him well.
501
00:21:20,316 --> 00:21:22,133
And as for you, Marlon
502
00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:25,366
you gotta treat this job like
a responsible, young adult
503
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:27,366
because if you don't, you're
gonna be in a lot of trouble
504
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:29,383
with me, you got it?
505
00:21:30,160 --> 00:21:31,383
- Yes, Shawn.
- Alright.
506
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,830
You know, pops, starting today
507
00:21:34,116 --> 00:21:36,150
I'mma be very responsible.
508
00:21:38,183 --> 00:21:40,300
[clanging]
509
00:21:40,333 --> 00:21:42,250
- Responsibility.
- Responsibility.
510
00:21:42,283 --> 00:21:45,000
(Marlon and Shawn)
Responsibility.
511
00:21:45,330 --> 00:21:47,133
- Responsibility.
- Alright.
512
00:21:47,166 --> 00:21:50,160
[dishes clanging]
513
00:21:50,500 --> 00:21:51,383
[instrumental music]
514
00:21:57,500 --> 00:22:00,660
[sighs]
Benny, this is hard. Ah!
515
00:22:00,100 --> 00:22:01,333
(Benny)
You think, this is hard?
516
00:22:01,366 --> 00:22:04,366
[speaking in foreign language]
517
00:22:16,133 --> 00:22:18,660
You did all that?
518
00:22:18,100 --> 00:22:22,166
Hell no! That's pig farming,
but that's hard.
519
00:22:24,133 --> 00:22:26,166
(Shawn)Look up, Marlon, say cheese.
36627
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