Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,774 --> 00:00:08,109
Uh, steve...
2
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:10,544
Steve?
3
00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:11,645
Huh?
4
00:00:11,712 --> 00:00:13,214
What is that?
5
00:00:13,281 --> 00:00:14,815
Aha.
6
00:00:14,882 --> 00:00:16,450
Fresh squid.
7
00:00:20,888 --> 00:00:22,590
Eww-aah.
8
00:00:30,664 --> 00:00:32,800
Hey, where
You going?
9
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:34,968
I think I'm gonna
Skip lunch
10
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:36,337
For a week.
11
00:00:37,905 --> 00:00:39,107
Hmm.
12
00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:45,746
* dum dum dee dum *
13
00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:47,348
* dum dum dee dum *
14
00:00:47,415 --> 00:00:48,982
* dum dum dee dum *
15
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:52,052
* dum dee dum
Dum dee dum **
16
00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:55,189
Myra, holy cow!
17
00:00:55,256 --> 00:00:56,624
Do you like my dress?
18
00:00:56,690 --> 00:00:58,326
I can still wear white,
19
00:00:58,392 --> 00:01:00,294
Darn it.
20
00:01:00,361 --> 00:01:02,530
Um, but--but why
Would you buy
A wedding dress?
21
00:01:02,596 --> 00:01:05,032
Because we're
Getting married
22
00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:06,534
Right after college,
23
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:10,471
And that's only
1,950 days away.
24
00:01:10,538 --> 00:01:11,539
Uh, myra,
25
00:01:11,605 --> 00:01:13,707
Don't you think
You're rushing things
26
00:01:13,774 --> 00:01:15,343
Just a smidge?
27
00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:17,911
Rushing?
In what way?
28
00:01:17,978 --> 00:01:21,014
Well, you're taking
Too much control,
29
00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:22,916
Making a lot of
Assumptions,
30
00:01:22,983 --> 00:01:25,519
And quite frankly,
I feel a little...
31
00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:27,155
Useless.
32
00:01:27,221 --> 00:01:28,856
Don't you worry.
33
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,691
They'll be plenty
For you to do
34
00:01:30,758 --> 00:01:32,460
On our wedding night.
35
00:01:32,526 --> 00:01:34,061
Wh--wh--for
Goodness sakes,
36
00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:35,763
Slow down!
37
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:37,965
I need some
Breathing room.
38
00:01:38,031 --> 00:01:39,600
Are you trying
To tell me
39
00:01:39,667 --> 00:01:40,768
You need more space?
40
00:01:40,834 --> 00:01:42,903
Yes, space.
41
00:01:42,970 --> 00:01:45,206
I need more space.
42
00:01:46,374 --> 00:01:49,610
Well, take all the space
You need, bucko.
43
00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:53,147
We're through.
44
00:01:55,349 --> 00:01:57,418
This is when you're
Supposed to stop me,
45
00:01:57,485 --> 00:02:00,221
Apologize, and beg me
To marry you.
46
00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:03,757
Well, I'm sorry, myra,
47
00:02:03,824 --> 00:02:06,594
But I can't do that.
48
00:02:06,660 --> 00:02:08,028
I see.
49
00:02:08,095 --> 00:02:10,298
I will not give you
The satisfaction
50
00:02:10,364 --> 00:02:12,566
Of seeing me lose
My temper.
51
00:02:40,694 --> 00:02:42,196
Listen, looky here--
52
00:02:42,263 --> 00:02:44,198
Looky here.
53
00:02:45,199 --> 00:02:46,166
Huh, huh?
54
00:02:46,234 --> 00:02:47,568
Harriette:
Hi, honey.
55
00:02:48,836 --> 00:02:50,170
What's wrong?
56
00:02:50,238 --> 00:02:52,306
Our neighbor,
Neidermeyer.
57
00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:54,942
Neidermeyer:
Yeah, hello.
58
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:55,976
Neidermeyer.
59
00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:57,044
Yeah, yeah.
Who's this?
60
00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:58,178
Winslow.
61
00:02:58,246 --> 00:02:59,680
What do you want?
62
00:02:59,747 --> 00:03:03,651
Your dog ate
My newspaper again.
63
00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:05,353
[laughs]
64
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:10,224
That dog belongs
On a leash.
65
00:03:10,291 --> 00:03:11,292
[laughs]
66
00:03:11,359 --> 00:03:13,227
You belong
On a leash!
67
00:03:14,562 --> 00:03:15,763
[click]
68
00:03:15,829 --> 00:03:18,332
He hung up on me!
69
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:19,933
I'll show
That blowhard.
70
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,602
Ca-ca-carl,
Carl, wait.
71
00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:23,637
What, you wanna
Piece of him, too?
72
00:03:23,704 --> 00:03:24,972
No.
73
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,006
Carl, please,
74
00:03:26,073 --> 00:03:27,040
Come on, honey.
75
00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:29,443
Sit down and cool off.
76
00:03:30,778 --> 00:03:33,514
Carl, you know
This feud between
You and nick,
77
00:03:33,581 --> 00:03:34,748
Is getting out of hand.
78
00:03:34,815 --> 00:03:36,550
Well, harriette,
It's not my fault.
79
00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:38,185
Now you see,
That's the attitude
80
00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:39,953
That keeps
The battle going.
81
00:03:40,020 --> 00:03:41,088
When's it gonna stop?
82
00:03:41,154 --> 00:03:43,190
When I bulldoze
His house.
83
00:03:43,257 --> 00:03:44,358
Uh, ca-ca-carl,
84
00:03:44,425 --> 00:03:45,926
Don't even joke
Like that.
85
00:03:45,993 --> 00:03:48,228
You know,
You're setting
A terrible example.
86
00:03:48,296 --> 00:03:50,063
Yesterday I saw
Richie and 3j
87
00:03:50,130 --> 00:03:51,665
Playing nick
And carl.
88
00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:54,935
Nick and carl?
89
00:03:55,002 --> 00:03:56,003
Yes.
90
00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:57,438
They were yelling
At each other
91
00:03:57,505 --> 00:03:59,340
And bumping bellies.
92
00:03:59,407 --> 00:04:01,008
You're kidding.
93
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,110
I think not.
94
00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:04,712
Well, gee, I--
95
00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:07,748
I never meant to set
A bad example
For the kids.
96
00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:10,384
Gee...
97
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:13,621
Harriette, it's just
That he makes me
So angry.
98
00:04:13,687 --> 00:04:16,424
I'm not gonna let him
Get the best of me.
99
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:18,659
Carl, he hasn't
Been getting
100
00:04:18,726 --> 00:04:19,727
The best of you.
101
00:04:19,793 --> 00:04:21,762
He's been getting
The worst of you.
102
00:04:39,780 --> 00:04:42,450
I cannot believe
That sigma theta
103
00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:44,217
Has its own
Beauty parlor.
104
00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:45,753
Well, it cost
A pretty penny,
105
00:04:45,819 --> 00:04:49,222
But on the plus side,
It keeps the penny pretty.
106
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:50,591
That's why allison's
President.
107
00:04:50,658 --> 00:04:52,259
She's a real wordsmith.
108
00:04:52,326 --> 00:04:53,927
Thank you, monica.
109
00:04:53,994 --> 00:04:55,663
You're welcome, allison.
110
00:04:57,331 --> 00:04:59,299
Why don't you show laura
Our computer room?
111
00:04:59,367 --> 00:05:00,368
Computer room?
112
00:05:00,434 --> 00:05:02,002
It overlooks the pool.
113
00:05:03,371 --> 00:05:05,773
So laura, why do you want
To join sigma theta?
114
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:08,308
Well, everybody says
It's the coolest
Sorority on campus.
115
00:05:08,376 --> 00:05:09,977
Good answer.
116
00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:11,379
[doorbell rings]
117
00:05:13,881 --> 00:05:15,349
Howdy there.
118
00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:16,750
Steve urkel.
119
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:17,951
I'm allison.
120
00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:19,353
And you're
Here because?
121
00:05:19,420 --> 00:05:21,321
To pick up
Laura winslow.
122
00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:23,256
Oh. Well, hang up
Your coat.
123
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:24,992
She'll be back
In a minute.
124
00:05:25,058 --> 00:05:26,059
Oh, thankee.
125
00:05:26,894 --> 00:05:28,896
[hums]
126
00:05:34,735 --> 00:05:37,004
While we're waiting
For laura,
127
00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:39,773
Why don't you
And I...Chat.
128
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,141
Hmm, chat?
129
00:05:41,208 --> 00:05:42,376
About what?
130
00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:43,977
About you.
131
00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:45,345
What's your major?
132
00:05:45,413 --> 00:05:46,880
Biological engineering.
133
00:05:46,947 --> 00:05:48,916
Right now I'm breeding
A grub worm
134
00:05:48,982 --> 00:05:51,118
With opposable thumbs.
135
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,252
Why?
136
00:05:52,319 --> 00:05:54,422
So it can hitchhike.
137
00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:57,057
That's very funny.
138
00:05:57,124 --> 00:05:58,258
[snorts]
139
00:05:58,325 --> 00:05:59,827
Why don't
We sit down?
140
00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:00,928
Yeah, okay.
141
00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:02,229
Wha-whoa!
142
00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:03,664
Whoa!
143
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,536
Sorry about that.
144
00:06:08,602 --> 00:06:10,871
Occasionally
I trip over...
145
00:06:10,938 --> 00:06:13,173
Everything.
146
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:15,275
You're a very
Unusual guy.
147
00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:16,710
I am?
148
00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:17,878
Mm-hmm.
149
00:06:17,945 --> 00:06:19,112
I know we just met,
150
00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:20,347
But there's
Something about you
151
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,483
That makes me...
Tingle.
152
00:06:24,785 --> 00:06:26,987
Well, maybe your
Butt's asleep.
153
00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:31,291
I don't think
That's it.
154
00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:33,226
You've got charisma,
155
00:06:33,293 --> 00:06:35,162
Style,
156
00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:37,097
Sex appeal.
157
00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:42,803
Something wrong?
158
00:06:42,870 --> 00:06:43,937
Yeah.
159
00:06:44,004 --> 00:06:46,740
Now my butt's asleep.
160
00:06:46,807 --> 00:06:49,677
You know,
Our sorority's
Having a party...
161
00:06:52,112 --> 00:06:53,814
Saturday night.
162
00:06:57,150 --> 00:06:59,052
Would you like
To be my date?
163
00:06:59,119 --> 00:07:00,788
Jeepers!
164
00:07:00,854 --> 00:07:03,691
Well, it sure is swell
Of you to ask me,
165
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:07,728
But I'm not sure if
I'm ready to date again.
166
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:24,712
I'll be here at 8:00.
167
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:26,213
Great.
168
00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:27,314
Uh, allison?
169
00:07:27,380 --> 00:07:29,149
Can I see you
For a sec?
170
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:31,318
Oh, boy.
171
00:07:31,384 --> 00:07:33,754
Don't go away.
172
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:35,222
I won't.
173
00:07:39,660 --> 00:07:41,394
I see you found
Your date
174
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,830
For our
Geek party.
175
00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:44,998
I didn't just find
Any old geek,
176
00:07:45,065 --> 00:07:47,000
I found the king geek.
177
00:07:56,143 --> 00:07:58,445
Ahh.
178
00:07:58,512 --> 00:08:00,648
You wanted
To see me,
Winslow?
179
00:08:00,714 --> 00:08:02,049
Uh, yeah, nick.
180
00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:03,784
I, uh...
181
00:08:03,851 --> 00:08:05,418
I...
182
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,687
Didn't I throw
That sweatshirt
183
00:08:06,754 --> 00:08:08,421
In the trash
Last week?
184
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,390
Yeah.
185
00:08:10,457 --> 00:08:11,792
Thanks.
186
00:08:12,793 --> 00:08:14,494
You're going
Through my trash?
187
00:08:14,562 --> 00:08:16,396
Hey, in here it's yours.
188
00:08:16,463 --> 00:08:18,431
When it's in a can
On the curb,
189
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:20,668
It's first come
First served.
190
00:08:20,734 --> 00:08:22,803
Now, what's up?
191
00:08:23,804 --> 00:08:25,906
Uh, look, nick, um,
192
00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:28,308
You know, ever since
You moved in next door,
193
00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:31,712
You and I have had
A little trouble
Getting along.
194
00:08:31,779 --> 00:08:33,246
Well, you're a jerk.
195
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:39,920
You know, ordinarily
A remark like that
Would cause me
196
00:08:39,987 --> 00:08:43,423
To reach down your
Throat and pull
Out your spleen.
197
00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:44,558
Yeah.
198
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:46,459
Yep, but not today.
199
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:47,961
And you know why?
200
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,030
You doubled up
On your wuss pills?
201
00:08:55,936 --> 00:08:57,470
Okay.
202
00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:58,538
No, no, no.
203
00:08:58,606 --> 00:09:00,608
You see, um,
Tomorrow night
204
00:09:00,674 --> 00:09:02,910
Is the big fight
On pay-per-view.
205
00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:04,845
It's for
The heavyweight title.
206
00:09:04,912 --> 00:09:07,648
So I-I'd like you
To watch it with me.
207
00:09:07,715 --> 00:09:10,317
Do I have
To pay half?
208
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,351
No, nick.
209
00:09:11,418 --> 00:09:13,120
It's my treat.
210
00:09:13,186 --> 00:09:14,622
What's the catch?
211
00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:16,123
There's no catch.
212
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:17,658
Just 2 guys hanging out,
213
00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:21,161
Trying to get
To know each other.
214
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,796
Wait a minute.
215
00:09:23,931 --> 00:09:28,135
You really wanna
Spend time with me?
216
00:09:28,201 --> 00:09:29,436
Sure.
217
00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:31,471
I wanna find out
If there's any chance
218
00:09:31,538 --> 00:09:33,306
That you and I
Can be friends.
219
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:36,343
You paying for
The grub, too?
220
00:09:38,245 --> 00:09:39,913
Yep.
221
00:09:39,980 --> 00:09:41,014
Whoa.
222
00:09:42,115 --> 00:09:43,550
Okay.
223
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:45,218
I'll be here.
224
00:09:51,058 --> 00:09:53,661
You have
A brain tumor
Or something?
225
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:56,329
No, nick.
226
00:09:56,396 --> 00:09:57,931
I'm just being neighborly.
227
00:10:02,402 --> 00:10:04,004
Thanks, neighbor.
228
00:10:12,780 --> 00:10:13,814
* is l.A. With it? *
229
00:10:13,881 --> 00:10:14,948
* come and get it *
230
00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:16,183
* new york,
Are you with it? *
231
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:17,117
* come and get it *
232
00:10:17,184 --> 00:10:18,351
* philadelphia,
You with it? *
233
00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:19,619
* come and get it *
234
00:10:19,687 --> 00:10:21,154
* come on, what
You gonna do? *
235
00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:22,990
* my friends all
Love to party *
236
00:10:23,056 --> 00:10:24,892
* my friends all
Love to party *
237
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,894
* my friends all
Love to party *
238
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,162
* my friends all
Love to party **
239
00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:36,636
Boys, would you get us
Some punch?
240
00:10:36,704 --> 00:10:37,905
Uh, punch,
Would that be
241
00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:39,973
The 18th century
British humor magazine,
242
00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:42,676
Or the popular sugar based
Party beverage?
243
00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:44,144
The latter.
244
00:10:44,211 --> 00:10:45,078
Make up your mind.
245
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,647
Do you want punch
Or a ladder?
246
00:10:50,550 --> 00:10:52,452
Whoo!
247
00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:55,488
My god, your date
Is a total cretin.
248
00:10:55,555 --> 00:10:57,090
Oh, you're just
Saying that
249
00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:59,259
To be nice.
250
00:10:59,326 --> 00:11:00,694
Aah, urkel in the house,
251
00:11:00,761 --> 00:11:02,696
Shakin' his groove thing!
252
00:11:14,207 --> 00:11:15,342
Geek: whoo!
253
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:17,745
Geek #2:
Yeah! Whoo!
254
00:11:22,615 --> 00:11:24,384
Ah, thank you,
Thank you, thank you.
255
00:11:26,286 --> 00:11:29,689
You know, you couldn't
Have picked a better
Suit for this party.
256
00:11:29,757 --> 00:11:31,324
Well, thank you,
Thank you, thank you.
257
00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:33,761
You know, I was gonna wear
My mohair pants,
258
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:35,595
But I got attacked
By a dog,
259
00:11:35,662 --> 00:11:38,131
And now they're
No hair pants.
260
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:41,468
Ooh, I hate when
That happens.
261
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,503
Glory!
262
00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:46,339
Look at that dress!
263
00:11:46,406 --> 00:11:49,242
Why it's so, so...
264
00:11:49,309 --> 00:11:51,244
Tight!
265
00:11:51,311 --> 00:11:54,614
I can almost see
What you had
For lunch.
266
00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:55,783
Excuse me, steve,
267
00:11:55,849 --> 00:11:57,885
I wanna talk to kimberly
For a second.
268
00:11:57,951 --> 00:11:59,386
Hurry back,
My princess.
269
00:11:59,452 --> 00:12:01,321
Your prince
In plaid awaits.
270
00:12:04,357 --> 00:12:05,692
Oh, man.
271
00:12:05,759 --> 00:12:06,894
What?
272
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,062
I almost wore that
Same suit tonight.
273
00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:10,563
Really?
274
00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:12,399
What were you doing
In my closet?
275
00:12:16,036 --> 00:12:18,638
Steven q. Urkel
At your service.
276
00:12:18,705 --> 00:12:21,308
Hey, we saw
Your date.
277
00:12:21,374 --> 00:12:22,709
Oh, yeah.
278
00:12:22,776 --> 00:12:24,277
Allison's a looker.
279
00:12:24,344 --> 00:12:25,712
And get a load of this,
280
00:12:25,779 --> 00:12:28,281
She asked me out.
281
00:12:28,348 --> 00:12:29,516
Hey, so did my date.
282
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:30,818
Mine, too.
283
00:12:30,884 --> 00:12:32,252
We're dudes.
We're dudes.
We're dudes.
284
00:12:32,319 --> 00:12:33,887
We're dudes.
We're dudes.
We're dudes.
285
00:12:33,954 --> 00:12:35,522
We're dudes.
We're dudes.
We're dudes.
286
00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,724
[fight bell rings]
Alright,
Here we go!
287
00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:39,692
Alright, stay
Away from him!
Stay away--
288
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:41,494
Hit 'em! Hit--
289
00:12:41,561 --> 00:12:42,529
Referee:
One...
290
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:43,897
2...
What do you mean?
291
00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:45,498
Get up you bum!
292
00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:46,900
You're a bum!
Get up!
293
00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:47,935
Get up!
You wuss!
294
00:12:48,001 --> 00:12:49,736
Get up!
Come on!
295
00:12:49,803 --> 00:12:51,604
Referee: 8, 9, 10!
Oh, please.
296
00:12:51,671 --> 00:12:53,841
Oh, man!
You believe that?!
297
00:12:53,907 --> 00:12:56,276
I just paid
50 bucks for a
10-second fight.
298
00:12:56,343 --> 00:12:57,410
Yeah.
299
00:12:57,477 --> 00:12:59,012
Better you than me.
300
00:13:03,350 --> 00:13:06,053
Ha ha ha, yeah.
301
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:09,222
Well, want some
Popcorn, nick?
302
00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:10,257
Oh.
303
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:11,558
Cost you 40 bucks.
304
00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:14,761
Thanks, carl.
305
00:13:14,828 --> 00:13:16,629
Oh, what are
You gonna do, right?
306
00:13:16,696 --> 00:13:18,798
Mmm, I like this
Cheese flavor.
307
00:13:18,866 --> 00:13:20,367
Yeah, me, too.
308
00:13:20,433 --> 00:13:22,702
But, uh, you know what?
309
00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:24,604
I don't wanna eat too much.
310
00:13:24,671 --> 00:13:27,374
Got a lady friend
Dropping by later.
311
00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:31,311
Ohh.
312
00:13:31,378 --> 00:13:32,913
What's her name?
313
00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:36,116
Cindy.
314
00:13:38,218 --> 00:13:39,853
Cin-dy?
315
00:13:40,854 --> 00:13:42,722
Mmm, she pretty?
316
00:13:42,789 --> 00:13:44,925
Is she pretty?
317
00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:46,894
Picture a combination
318
00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:49,396
Of michelle pfeiffer
319
00:13:49,462 --> 00:13:51,431
And heather locklear.
320
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:52,765
Whoa.
321
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:54,334
Now...
322
00:13:54,401 --> 00:13:55,602
Squint.
323
00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:03,710
That's cindy.
324
00:14:03,776 --> 00:14:05,078
Nice.
325
00:14:06,779 --> 00:14:08,415
Of course,
326
00:14:08,481 --> 00:14:09,849
Cindy's not as pretty
327
00:14:09,917 --> 00:14:12,252
As my ex-wife,
328
00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:13,286
Helen.
329
00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,522
Carl: oh.
330
00:14:15,588 --> 00:14:17,024
You know, it's weird.
331
00:14:17,090 --> 00:14:20,360
It's been 5 years
Since the divorce.
332
00:14:20,427 --> 00:14:22,395
I still miss her.
333
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:23,730
That's too bad, nick.
334
00:14:23,796 --> 00:14:26,299
Ah, what are
You gonna do?
335
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,335
It just didn't work out,
That's all.
336
00:14:31,004 --> 00:14:32,605
Money problems.
337
00:14:33,806 --> 00:14:35,775
Didn't make enough, huh?
338
00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:37,310
No, she didn't.
339
00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:46,253
See, I wanted us to be
A 2-income family.
340
00:14:46,319 --> 00:14:49,489
Helen wanted to stay home
And have kids.
341
00:14:49,556 --> 00:14:51,258
So we split up.
342
00:14:51,324 --> 00:14:52,725
Oh, gee,
343
00:14:52,792 --> 00:14:53,927
That's rough, nick.
344
00:14:53,994 --> 00:14:55,862
But--but now,
When I see you
345
00:14:55,929 --> 00:14:59,599
And your
Beautiful family...
346
00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:03,503
I realize
I made a mistake.
347
00:15:06,539 --> 00:15:08,008
A terrible mistake.
348
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:10,743
That's too bad, nick.
349
00:15:10,810 --> 00:15:12,879
Wanna watch a movie?
350
00:15:12,946 --> 00:15:16,083
You know, I begged her
Not to leave me.
351
00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:18,751
I fell to my knees
In the snow.
352
00:15:18,818 --> 00:15:19,987
She was holding
2 suitcases,
353
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:22,522
A taxi was waiting.
354
00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:24,291
It was christmas eve.
355
00:15:25,558 --> 00:15:26,659
Aw, nick.
356
00:15:26,726 --> 00:15:28,728
I pleaded with her,
"Helen, no!"
357
00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:29,862
Nick.
358
00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:32,832
"For god's sake,
Don't leave me!"
359
00:15:32,899 --> 00:15:34,067
Nick, nick, look,
It's columbo.
360
00:15:34,134 --> 00:15:35,935
Wanna watch columbo?
361
00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:41,941
[hip hop music plays]
362
00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:58,125
Girls: whoo!
363
00:16:00,060 --> 00:16:02,062
Everyone: whoo!
364
00:16:27,087 --> 00:16:29,256
I'm sorry,
I didn't know
There was a party.
365
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:30,990
I left my book
Bag here.
366
00:16:31,058 --> 00:16:32,625
Laura, you came at
The perfect time.
367
00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:35,995
We're just
About to announce
The winner.
368
00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:37,964
Winner?
What winner?
369
00:16:38,031 --> 00:16:41,101
We're having our
Annual geek party.
370
00:16:41,168 --> 00:16:42,635
Geek party?
371
00:16:42,702 --> 00:16:45,072
We each bring
The nerdiest guy
We can find.
372
00:16:45,138 --> 00:16:48,441
And the worst one
Gets crowned king geek.
373
00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:51,144
Don't these guys mind
374
00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:52,979
The way you're
Making fun of them?
375
00:16:53,046 --> 00:16:54,047
That's the best part.
376
00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:55,348
They have no idea.
377
00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:58,818
They actually think
We like them.
378
00:16:58,885 --> 00:17:00,053
That is
The cruelest thing
379
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:02,289
I've ever heard
In my entire life.
380
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:04,557
Yeah. Cool,
Isn't it?
381
00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:07,594
No, it's not cool.
382
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:09,929
These guys are people,
And they have feelings.
383
00:17:09,996 --> 00:17:11,098
Oh, please.
384
00:17:11,164 --> 00:17:12,165
Look at them.
385
00:17:12,232 --> 00:17:13,766
They're geeks.
386
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:15,602
[girls laugh]
387
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,039
Yeah?
388
00:17:20,107 --> 00:17:21,274
Well, one of
Those geeks
389
00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:23,110
Happens to be
A friend of mine.
390
00:17:23,176 --> 00:17:25,345
In that case,
You better find
Some new friends.
391
00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:28,781
Or maybe you need
To find another
Sorority.
392
00:17:28,848 --> 00:17:31,251
Oh, you're not
A sorority.
393
00:17:31,318 --> 00:17:32,485
You're a pack of vicious,
394
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,554
Self-centered,
Stuck-up barracudas
395
00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:36,523
With teased hair
And push-up bras.
396
00:17:41,228 --> 00:17:42,762
Hi, laura lee.
397
00:17:42,829 --> 00:17:44,197
Steve, I think
We should go.
398
00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:45,265
Are you kidding?
399
00:17:45,332 --> 00:17:47,300
Why, this party
Is popping.
400
00:17:47,367 --> 00:17:48,901
And look at my date.
401
00:17:48,968 --> 00:17:50,370
Fox-o-rama!
402
00:17:50,437 --> 00:17:53,039
And I think
She's wearing
A push-up bra.
403
00:17:53,106 --> 00:17:54,774
Come on, steve,
Let's go.
404
00:17:54,841 --> 00:17:56,576
No, sir, ma'am.
405
00:17:56,643 --> 00:17:58,611
I'm not leaving
The party of
The year
406
00:17:58,678 --> 00:18:00,847
Until you tell me
What in sam hill
407
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:01,881
Is going on here.
408
00:18:01,948 --> 00:18:02,982
Alright,
Steve, fine.
409
00:18:03,049 --> 00:18:05,452
This is a geek party.
410
00:18:05,518 --> 00:18:09,422
Well, of course
It's a greek party.
411
00:18:09,489 --> 00:18:12,292
It's a sorority,
For crying out loud.
412
00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:14,060
It's got, look,
Sigma theta,
413
00:18:14,127 --> 00:18:15,728
Based on the ancient
Greek alphabet--
414
00:18:15,795 --> 00:18:17,897
No, no, no, no.
415
00:18:17,964 --> 00:18:19,632
Not greek, geek.
416
00:18:19,699 --> 00:18:20,900
Geeks: huh?
417
00:18:20,967 --> 00:18:22,202
As in nerd,
418
00:18:22,269 --> 00:18:23,770
Dufus, dweeb.
419
00:18:23,836 --> 00:18:25,405
Geeks: ohh.
420
00:18:36,249 --> 00:18:37,684
Allison, is--
421
00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:41,588
Is this true?
422
00:18:41,654 --> 00:18:43,190
Um...
423
00:18:43,256 --> 00:18:45,658
Well, yeah.
424
00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:47,760
That's--
425
00:18:47,827 --> 00:18:49,396
That's really mean.
426
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:52,299
Oh, come on, it's
Just harmless fun.
427
00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:54,967
Hey, when you're
Hurting other people,
428
00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:56,769
That ain't harmless,
Sister.
429
00:18:58,571 --> 00:18:59,806
Steve: look,
430
00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:03,343
I might not be
The trendiest
Guy on campus,
431
00:19:03,410 --> 00:19:06,413
And I might not even
Be the best looking,
432
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:08,848
And I'm certainly not
The most coordinated.
433
00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:12,919
But you know what?
434
00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:15,855
I like myself...
435
00:19:15,922 --> 00:19:17,690
And that makes me cool.
436
00:19:17,757 --> 00:19:19,326
Geeks: yeah!
437
00:19:24,531 --> 00:19:27,834
Hey, I'm sorry,
Okay?
438
00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:29,869
Oh, you bet you're sorry.
439
00:19:31,404 --> 00:19:32,939
And the reason
You're sorry
440
00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,707
Is because you're
Gonna miss out
441
00:19:34,774 --> 00:19:38,245
On 153 pounds
442
00:19:38,311 --> 00:19:41,080
Of raging testosterone.
443
00:19:41,147 --> 00:19:43,583
Geeks: yeah!
444
00:19:43,650 --> 00:19:46,953
Hoo, hoo, hoo,
Hoo, hoo, hoo,
445
00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:49,222
Hoo, hoo,
Hoo, hoo,
446
00:19:49,289 --> 00:19:51,324
Hoo, hoo,
Hoo, hoo,
Hoo, hoo,
447
00:19:51,391 --> 00:19:53,393
Hoo, hoo,
Hoo, hoo,
Hoo, hoo.
448
00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:57,797
Say, "Goodbye"
To that, baby.
449
00:19:57,864 --> 00:19:59,499
Geeks: yeah!
450
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:02,969
Whoo!
451
00:20:10,577 --> 00:20:11,444
Hey, eddo.
452
00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:12,712
Want some breakfast?
453
00:20:14,180 --> 00:20:15,715
What are you having?
454
00:20:15,782 --> 00:20:17,216
Corn flakes, milk,
455
00:20:17,284 --> 00:20:18,918
Sliced bananas.
456
00:20:18,985 --> 00:20:20,820
Okay, that sounds safe.
457
00:20:20,887 --> 00:20:22,322
I can deal
With that.
458
00:20:22,389 --> 00:20:23,423
Heh heh heh.
459
00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:25,825
Good ol'
Corn flakes.
460
00:20:25,892 --> 00:20:28,528
Mmm.
461
00:20:32,965 --> 00:20:35,268
Say, man.
462
00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:40,640
Something moved
In that bowl.
463
00:20:41,874 --> 00:20:43,343
Sure.
464
00:20:43,410 --> 00:20:44,977
That's the live eel,
465
00:20:45,044 --> 00:20:46,479
Packed with protein.
466
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:49,316
Eww.
467
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:50,883
Steve, ugh!
468
00:20:52,419 --> 00:20:54,454
You so nasty!
469
00:20:56,188 --> 00:20:57,590
Eel!
470
00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,629
Hello, steven.
471
00:21:02,695 --> 00:21:04,196
My mother,
Frau monkhouse,
472
00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:06,065
Told me you called.
473
00:21:06,132 --> 00:21:07,534
Yes, I--
474
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,936
I wanted to talk to you.
475
00:21:10,002 --> 00:21:11,604
Quel subject?
476
00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:14,707
Well...
477
00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:17,344
If you would agree to be
A little less pushy
478
00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:19,546
About this
Marriage subject,
479
00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:23,583
Well, m-m-maybe we could
Get back together.
480
00:21:25,051 --> 00:21:26,619
Wait one minute.
481
00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:30,390
You think you could
Just toss me aside
482
00:21:30,457 --> 00:21:31,691
Like an old gym sock,
483
00:21:31,758 --> 00:21:34,327
And then expect me to
Jump back into your arms
484
00:21:34,394 --> 00:21:37,730
The second you snap
Your fickle fingers?
485
00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:38,865
Well...
486
00:21:38,931 --> 00:21:40,032
Okay!
487
00:21:40,099 --> 00:21:42,335
Mmm, mmm, mmm,
Mmm, mmm,
488
00:21:42,402 --> 00:21:44,036
Mmm, mmm, mmm,
Mmm, mmm.
30378
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.