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1
00:00:08,609 --> 00:00:12,546
Laura...
The most beautiful
Sister in the world.
2
00:00:14,282 --> 00:00:15,416
Forget it, eddie.
3
00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:18,052
The laura savings
And loan is closed.
4
00:00:19,787 --> 00:00:21,322
Laura, that's cold.
5
00:00:21,389 --> 00:00:22,890
I gave you
A compliment,
6
00:00:22,956 --> 00:00:25,359
And you give
Back an insult.
7
00:00:25,426 --> 00:00:27,928
I'm sorry, eddie. I didn't mean
To hurt your feelings.
8
00:00:27,995 --> 00:00:29,330
That's better.
9
00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:31,199
So can I borrow
50 bucks?
10
00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:35,069
What happened?
Another speeding ticket?
11
00:00:35,136 --> 00:00:36,537
No.
12
00:00:36,604 --> 00:00:39,840
They got me on some
Obscure technicality.
13
00:00:39,907 --> 00:00:41,275
Did you know
They expect you
14
00:00:41,342 --> 00:00:44,478
To stop at a stop sign
Every single time?
15
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,950
Sorry, I can't help you, eddie.
I'm saving up for a computer.
16
00:00:50,017 --> 00:00:51,719
That's just like you...
17
00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:53,587
To think
Only of yourself.
18
00:00:55,356 --> 00:00:57,625
Good news! I'm here.
19
00:01:06,100 --> 00:01:07,435
Ooh.
20
00:01:11,105 --> 00:01:13,141
Steve, I realize
21
00:01:13,207 --> 00:01:15,443
People ask you this
Every day of your life,
22
00:01:15,509 --> 00:01:18,846
But why do you
Look like that?
23
00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:22,483
I've been working
In my basement nonstop,
24
00:01:22,550 --> 00:01:25,453
And I decided it was time
For a fish stick break.
25
00:01:33,961 --> 00:01:36,697
Mmm.
26
00:01:36,764 --> 00:01:39,433
Now that's flounder.
27
00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:41,235
Want a bite?
28
00:01:41,302 --> 00:01:43,604
Steve, you're supposed
To cook those.
29
00:01:43,671 --> 00:01:46,607
And lose that wonderful
Ocean taste?
30
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:50,778
So, you still
Trying to perfect
31
00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:52,913
Those radio-controlled
Garbage cans?
32
00:01:52,980 --> 00:01:56,250
Not since
I had to pick mom
Up at the dump.
33
00:01:57,818 --> 00:02:00,120
I'm working
On something more
Important now--
34
00:02:00,188 --> 00:02:01,622
A robot.
35
00:02:01,689 --> 00:02:03,924
I've entered
The national
Robotics contest.
36
00:02:03,991 --> 00:02:06,627
I'm on the verge of
Creating artificial
Intelligence.
37
00:02:06,694 --> 00:02:09,763
It's a discovery
That will
Change the world.
38
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:11,098
Steve...
39
00:02:11,165 --> 00:02:14,635
Bud, pal, amigo,
Compadre, homeboy...
40
00:02:16,504 --> 00:02:18,606
Does this contest
Have cash prizes?
41
00:02:18,672 --> 00:02:20,774
Nope. First prize
Is a computer.
42
00:02:20,841 --> 00:02:22,176
Oh.
43
00:02:22,243 --> 00:02:24,445
Computer?
44
00:02:25,413 --> 00:02:27,748
Did you say
"Computer"?
45
00:02:27,815 --> 00:02:31,118
Oh, yeah. Top-of-the-line,
State-of-the-art.
46
00:02:31,185 --> 00:02:32,920
If you win
That computer,
47
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:34,622
Could I borrow
It sometime?
48
00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:36,424
Oh, pshaw.
49
00:02:38,359 --> 00:02:39,827
I already
Have a computer.
50
00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:41,362
I got a used one
From nasa.
51
00:02:41,429 --> 00:02:44,232
My uncle colonel werner
Von urkel gave it to me.
52
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:47,668
If I win the computer,
53
00:02:47,735 --> 00:02:50,371
You can just have
The silly old thing.
54
00:02:51,439 --> 00:02:52,773
Oh, steve! Thank you!
55
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,308
Oh...
56
00:02:57,478 --> 00:02:58,679
Oh...
57
00:02:58,746 --> 00:03:00,281
Oh...
58
00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:07,455
I--I better
Get back to the l-l-lab.
59
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:19,933
I'm together now.
60
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:22,336
I'll be leaving.
61
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,985
* it's a rare condition *
62
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:39,587
* in this day and age *
63
00:03:39,653 --> 00:03:42,823
* to read any good news
On the newspaper page *
64
00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:46,527
* and love and tradition
Of the grand design *
65
00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:50,764
* some people say
Is even harder to find *
66
00:03:50,831 --> 00:03:54,201
* well, then, there must be
Some magic clue *
67
00:03:54,268 --> 00:03:58,005
* inside these gentle walls *
68
00:03:58,071 --> 00:04:01,809
* 'cause all I see
Is a tower of dreams *
69
00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:05,679
* real love burstin'
Out of every seam *
70
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,883
* as days go by *
71
00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:13,621
* we're gonna fill our house
With happiness *
72
00:04:13,687 --> 00:04:16,590
* the moon may cry *
73
00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:20,894
* we're gonna smother
The blues with tenderness *
74
00:04:20,961 --> 00:04:23,997
* when days go by *
75
00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:27,468
* there's room for you
Room for me *
76
00:04:27,535 --> 00:04:31,572
* for gentle hearts
And opportunity *
77
00:04:31,639 --> 00:04:34,675
* as days go by *
78
00:04:34,742 --> 00:04:39,747
* it's the bigger love
Of the family *
79
00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:55,796
Okay, let's see.
Six words...
80
00:04:55,863 --> 00:05:00,033
"If blank could
Blank blank now."
81
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:03,170
Oh, I give up.
It's too hard.
82
00:05:03,236 --> 00:05:06,374
Um, "If they could
See me now."
83
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:09,710
Yep. Shirley maclaine
In sweet charity.
84
00:05:11,278 --> 00:05:12,880
Very good.
85
00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:16,049
Now beat it.
86
00:05:18,719 --> 00:05:20,721
They watch
Too much tv.
87
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:29,730
Ooh, mother winslow,
Is that a new dress?
88
00:05:29,797 --> 00:05:30,998
Yep.
89
00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:33,401
Oh,
It is gorgeous.
90
00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:35,436
Oh, glad you like it.
91
00:05:35,503 --> 00:05:37,371
It was so expensive...
92
00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:39,707
I had to write you
Out of my will.
93
00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:46,414
Wai-ub-ub-ub-ub--
94
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:49,216
Thup-thup-thup-
Thup-thup.
95
00:05:49,282 --> 00:05:50,584
Where you going?
96
00:05:50,651 --> 00:05:52,920
I'm going dancing
With fletcher thomas.
97
00:05:52,986 --> 00:05:54,321
Again?
98
00:05:54,388 --> 00:05:56,056
Mama, that's twice
In one week.
99
00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:57,558
So?
100
00:05:57,625 --> 00:06:00,694
Mother, I just plain don't
Like that fletcher guy.
101
00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:03,631
I see how
He looks at you
When you walk by.
102
00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:04,832
Really?
103
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:08,702
Oh, that walk you
Showed me is paying off.
104
00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:12,205
Go ahead, honey.
Strut your stuff.
105
00:06:12,272 --> 00:06:14,408
Flip those hips.
106
00:06:14,475 --> 00:06:17,310
Step and sway.
Step and sway.
107
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:19,913
Got to take
His breath away.
108
00:06:21,415 --> 00:06:23,717
Oh, great. Terrific.
109
00:06:23,784 --> 00:06:25,318
My wife
And my sister-in-law
110
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:28,321
Are giving my mother
Floozy lessons.
111
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:33,260
Carl, I'm 80 years old,
And fletcher is 83.
112
00:06:33,326 --> 00:06:35,395
We're spending
A lot of time together
113
00:06:35,463 --> 00:06:38,065
Because we don't have
A lot of time left.
114
00:06:43,170 --> 00:06:44,404
And that's it, mom?
115
00:06:44,472 --> 00:06:46,907
Oh, no...
116
00:06:46,974 --> 00:06:49,342
We also get
Two-for-one discounts
117
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:51,545
For the hot tub club.
118
00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:19,106
Mother.
119
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:23,644
Ooh. Well, well.
The paper's not here yet.
120
00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:26,714
Mother...
121
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:28,916
It is 6:15
In the morning.
122
00:07:28,982 --> 00:07:30,083
Where were you?
123
00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:31,218
I was at fletcher's.
124
00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:33,521
What? Was he there?
125
00:07:33,587 --> 00:07:35,823
Oh, was he ever.
126
00:07:39,226 --> 00:07:41,161
Mama!
127
00:07:41,228 --> 00:07:43,664
Oh, lighten up.
128
00:07:43,731 --> 00:07:45,265
Okay, mother,
That is it.
129
00:07:45,332 --> 00:07:48,101
I don't want you to see
That fletcher ever again.
130
00:07:48,168 --> 00:07:49,336
What?
131
00:07:49,402 --> 00:07:51,539
You heard me.
He is off-limits.
132
00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:55,175
Carl,
I'm your mother.
133
00:07:55,242 --> 00:07:56,243
But, mama--
134
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:57,477
You show me respect!
135
00:07:57,545 --> 00:07:58,679
But, mama--
136
00:07:58,746 --> 00:07:59,980
I know you're stubborn
As a mule,
137
00:08:00,047 --> 00:08:02,883
But you don't have
To act like a jackass!
138
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:16,564
Waldo, my traffic ticket
Has to be paid tomorrow,
139
00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,599
Or I could lose my license.
140
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:23,070
You think you could borrow the
Money from your sister?
141
00:08:25,272 --> 00:08:26,740
Sorry. My family
Is saving up
142
00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:28,676
To send
My brother reynaldo
To the olympics.
143
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:31,545
Oh. What's his event?
144
00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:37,751
You mean you have to
Pick one ahead of time?
145
00:08:40,053 --> 00:08:42,189
Well, that's usually
The way it works.
146
00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:45,626
Oh, he was just go to barcelona
And get in the shortest line.
147
00:08:50,664 --> 00:08:52,265
Have you
Seen laura?
148
00:08:52,332 --> 00:08:53,433
Nope.
149
00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:54,835
Sure you have.
150
00:08:54,902 --> 00:08:57,871
Pretty girl,
Dark hair...
151
00:08:57,938 --> 00:09:00,173
Your sister,
For god's sakes.
152
00:09:03,076 --> 00:09:06,213
I meant I haven't
Seen her today.
153
00:09:06,279 --> 00:09:08,315
Oh...Cool.
154
00:09:09,817 --> 00:09:12,119
Well, come on. I got
To show you guys something.
155
00:09:18,626 --> 00:09:21,528
Gentlemen,
Allow me to present
156
00:09:21,595 --> 00:09:24,732
An unparalleled
Electronic achievement.
157
00:09:24,798 --> 00:09:28,335
The one, the only...
158
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,604
Urkelbot!
159
00:09:39,647 --> 00:09:42,783
Wow!
You invented robonerd.
160
00:09:45,786 --> 00:09:47,454
Does he move?
161
00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:49,556
Does he move?
162
00:09:49,623 --> 00:09:52,025
Well...
163
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:57,364
[gears whir]
164
00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:37,905
Hello.
165
00:10:40,107 --> 00:10:42,175
What
A lovely house.
166
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,151
Did I do that?
167
00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:58,826
Gee, this is incredible!
How are you controlling it?
168
00:10:58,892 --> 00:11:00,728
Ah, now, that's the beauty part.
169
00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:02,062
You see, I'm not.
170
00:11:02,129 --> 00:11:04,131
Urkelbot has
Artificial intelligence.
171
00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:07,835
And that means he can walk
And think all by himself.
172
00:11:09,302 --> 00:11:12,272
I was created
By the handsome,
Intelligent, sexy
173
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:14,274
Steven q. Urkel.
174
00:11:25,485 --> 00:11:26,954
He worships me.
175
00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:29,256
He's learning at
An incredible rate.
176
00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:30,724
By my calculations,
177
00:11:30,791 --> 00:11:32,692
His
Intelligence doubles
Every 20 minutes.
178
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:36,463
Every 18 minutes
And 35 seconds,
To be exact.
179
00:11:40,333 --> 00:11:41,701
Show-off.
180
00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:46,106
Hey, guys, I--
181
00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:53,380
Whoa, mama.
182
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:08,128
Laura my luscious lilly.
This is urkelbot.
183
00:12:08,195 --> 00:12:10,463
Steve you did it.
You built a robot.
184
00:12:10,530 --> 00:12:12,465
Oh, yes.
Yes, yes.
185
00:12:14,768 --> 00:12:16,069
He talks and
Everything.
186
00:12:16,136 --> 00:12:17,737
You're a cinch
To win first prize.
187
00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:20,307
And you'll get your
Computer, babycakes.
188
00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:22,943
Urkelbot's kind of cute.
189
00:12:24,044 --> 00:12:26,146
And you, my dear,
190
00:12:26,213 --> 00:12:29,182
Are a sight for
Sore optical scanners.
191
00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:32,285
Have you
And steven q. Urkel
192
00:12:32,352 --> 00:12:35,322
Formed a human
Emotional attachment?
193
00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:36,790
What?
194
00:12:36,857 --> 00:12:39,092
Are you hot
For each other's bods?
195
00:12:41,728 --> 00:12:43,396
No!
Yes!
196
00:12:43,463 --> 00:12:46,533
I think I'm in love.
197
00:12:49,036 --> 00:12:50,804
How about a kiss?
198
00:12:55,208 --> 00:12:57,911
Steve, that hunk of metal
Just made a pass at me.
199
00:12:57,978 --> 00:12:59,112
I'm sorry, laura.
200
00:12:59,179 --> 00:13:01,448
I'll reprogram him
Immediately.
201
00:13:01,514 --> 00:13:03,550
Good.
This is too weird.
202
00:13:07,154 --> 00:13:09,322
Wow. A robot
That chases after girls.
203
00:13:09,389 --> 00:13:12,860
Yeah. We're
Being replaced
By machines, man.
204
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:17,530
Urkelbot, I'm afraid I'm going
To have to turn you off.
205
00:13:17,597 --> 00:13:19,366
I don't think so.
206
00:13:19,432 --> 00:13:21,969
Hyah!
207
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:35,382
[gears wind down]
208
00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:39,887
Ohh.
209
00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:41,488
Boy, that
Was a close one.
210
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:42,622
Yeah.
211
00:13:42,689 --> 00:13:43,690
[clump]
212
00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:45,258
[gears whir]
213
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:46,359
Gotcha.
214
00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:48,528
But...But I flipped
Your "Off" switch.
215
00:13:48,595 --> 00:13:52,132
Yeah? Well, I bypassed
That circuit.
216
00:13:52,199 --> 00:13:54,434
"Off" is for losers.
217
00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:56,569
I'm an "On" kind of guy.
218
00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:02,910
Oh, laura.
219
00:14:06,479 --> 00:14:07,580
Wait! Wait!
220
00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:09,182
Laura's my girl.
221
00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:15,088
Ha! I will not rest
Until she is mine.
222
00:14:15,155 --> 00:14:18,658
Now you
Listen to me, bub.
223
00:14:18,725 --> 00:14:20,127
I am your creator,
224
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,963
And I am the boss
Around here.
225
00:14:24,431 --> 00:14:25,798
Not anymore.
226
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,567
This is war,
Nerd-boy.
227
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,610
Now, listen mother.
228
00:14:37,677 --> 00:14:40,613
I'm afraid I have
To lay down the law.
229
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:42,549
No more fletcher thomas.
230
00:14:42,615 --> 00:14:43,816
No more discussion.
231
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,553
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah..
Don't argue with me.
232
00:14:47,955 --> 00:14:50,190
I have spoken.
233
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:59,199
Mother.
234
00:15:03,070 --> 00:15:04,471
What is it, carl?
235
00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:06,339
Would you please come
And take a seat?
236
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,075
I have something
To say to you.
237
00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:16,249
Yes?
238
00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:25,825
I'm sorry, mommy.
239
00:15:25,892 --> 00:15:27,794
Oh, baby,
Come here.
240
00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:29,662
Oh,
There, there,
Baby doll.
241
00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:34,667
I hate it when
You're mad at me.
242
00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:39,739
I don't know
Why I'm so crazed
About you two.
243
00:15:39,806 --> 00:15:41,975
You don't?
244
00:15:42,042 --> 00:15:44,744
Well, it's just that
When he looks at you,
245
00:15:44,811 --> 00:15:48,948
It's obvious that he really
Likes you and respects you.
246
00:15:49,016 --> 00:15:51,184
How can you trust
A man like that?
247
00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:57,024
Carl, let me
Ask you something.
248
00:15:57,090 --> 00:15:58,925
Did you
Trust your father?
249
00:15:58,992 --> 00:16:00,827
Absolutely.
250
00:16:00,893 --> 00:16:02,895
Everybody did.
251
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:06,566
My father was the finest man
Who ever walked this earth.
252
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:08,135
Yes, he was.
253
00:16:08,201 --> 00:16:09,869
And that's why
I chose him.
254
00:16:09,936 --> 00:16:13,673
And, I might add,
I had plenty
To choose from.
255
00:16:17,844 --> 00:16:20,980
I was a knockout, honey.
256
00:16:22,882 --> 00:16:23,916
Well, ma...
257
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,018
Mm-hmm?
258
00:16:25,085 --> 00:16:27,087
You still
Are a knockout.
259
00:16:29,456 --> 00:16:33,526
Son, if I had
The good taste to
Choose your father,
260
00:16:33,593 --> 00:16:36,529
Shouldn't you trust
My judgment now?
261
00:16:36,596 --> 00:16:38,065
Huh?
262
00:16:42,902 --> 00:16:44,037
Yes, mama.
263
00:16:44,104 --> 00:16:46,306
Well, then,
Come here and hug me.
264
00:16:48,275 --> 00:16:49,742
I love you,
You little devil.
265
00:16:49,809 --> 00:16:51,111
I'm sorry, mom.
266
00:17:04,891 --> 00:17:06,526
[crack]
267
00:17:09,262 --> 00:17:11,131
[knock on door]
268
00:17:12,165 --> 00:17:13,766
* who is it? *
269
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:15,502
It's me, laura.
270
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:41,228
Steve?
271
00:17:41,661 --> 00:17:42,629
Steve?
272
00:17:42,695 --> 00:17:44,030
Where's steve?
273
00:17:44,097 --> 00:17:47,100
That scrawny human
With the big feet?
274
00:17:47,167 --> 00:17:49,702
Yeah.
Where is he?
275
00:17:49,769 --> 00:17:51,871
Who in sam hill cares?
276
00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:54,274
I do. He just
Called and asked
Me to come over.
277
00:17:54,341 --> 00:17:56,176
He said it was a matter
Of life and death.
278
00:17:56,243 --> 00:17:58,211
That wasn't steve.
279
00:17:58,278 --> 00:18:00,847
That was me.
280
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,715
I can do anyone.
281
00:18:03,983 --> 00:18:06,253
[as carl]
Steve, go home.
282
00:18:06,319 --> 00:18:08,855
[as harriette]
Steve, go home.
283
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:11,358
[as eddie]
Steve, go home.
284
00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:13,993
[as laura]
Steve, go home.
285
00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:17,130
[as elvis]
* well, since
My baby left me *
286
00:18:17,197 --> 00:18:19,432
* I found a new place
To dwell *
287
00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:22,269
* well, it's down
At the end
Of lonely street *
288
00:18:22,335 --> 00:18:24,637
* at heartbreak hotel *
289
00:18:32,579 --> 00:18:33,480
Okay, hold it.
290
00:18:33,546 --> 00:18:35,982
I want to know
Where steve is.
291
00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:37,617
Forget steve.
292
00:18:37,684 --> 00:18:38,885
He was inferior.
293
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:41,020
I am superior.
You will marry me,
294
00:18:41,087 --> 00:18:44,357
And we will
Function happily
Ever after.
295
00:18:44,424 --> 00:18:47,360
Come on, baby.
Let's energize.
296
00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:48,928
Help!
297
00:18:48,995 --> 00:18:51,364
Laura, is that you?
298
00:18:51,431 --> 00:18:52,932
Steve, where are you?
299
00:18:52,999 --> 00:18:54,934
In the closet.
300
00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:56,569
No, I'm not.
301
00:18:56,636 --> 00:19:00,240
I'm...In new york
On a business trip.
302
00:19:02,442 --> 00:19:04,177
Steve, are you okay?
303
00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:07,880
No. This closet
Doesn't have
A bathroom.
304
00:19:07,947 --> 00:19:10,149
Open this door
Right now.
305
00:19:10,217 --> 00:19:11,884
Forget it, sugar-knees.
306
00:19:11,951 --> 00:19:14,454
I'm much better looking
Than that drip,
307
00:19:14,521 --> 00:19:17,257
And I'm 4,000 times smarter.
308
00:19:22,695 --> 00:19:24,631
Steve, how do you
Cut him off?
309
00:19:24,697 --> 00:19:26,899
You can't.
He's out of control.
310
00:19:26,966 --> 00:19:29,236
Steve, help me.
He's after me!
311
00:19:29,302 --> 00:19:32,171
Stand back.
I'm going to break
The door down.
312
00:19:32,239 --> 00:19:34,374
[thud]
313
00:19:35,875 --> 00:19:37,477
Ow!
314
00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:41,648
Face it. You're mine.
315
00:19:43,149 --> 00:19:45,385
Let go of me!
316
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,527
Did I do that?
317
00:19:55,895 --> 00:19:57,330
That does it.
318
00:19:57,397 --> 00:19:59,532
No more mr. Nicebot.
319
00:20:01,133 --> 00:20:02,201
Steve,
Watch out.
320
00:20:02,269 --> 00:20:03,503
That thing
Is crazy.
321
00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:04,471
Stay back!
322
00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:08,107
Go to your room!
I'm your father!
323
00:20:08,174 --> 00:20:09,842
Don't you sass me!
324
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:14,314
Steve, watch out!
325
00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:16,015
Come on over here.
326
00:20:16,082 --> 00:20:17,650
Oh, boy.
327
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:28,661
Uh-oh, co2.
328
00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:30,497
Toodle-oo.
329
00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:32,999
Warning--
System shutdown.
330
00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:34,233
[as carl]
Steve, go...
331
00:20:34,301 --> 00:20:35,935
[as eddie]
Steve, go...
332
00:20:36,002 --> 00:20:39,706
[as elvis]
* I feel so lonely
I could die *
333
00:20:43,410 --> 00:20:44,944
Steve, you saved me!
334
00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:48,448
Thank you.
335
00:20:48,515 --> 00:20:50,149
Thank you
Ever so much.
336
00:20:50,216 --> 00:20:52,184
Hey, no sweat, my pet.
337
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:54,454
Steve...
338
00:20:54,521 --> 00:20:57,857
I want you to turn
This thing into a go-cart.
339
00:20:57,924 --> 00:21:01,328
But, but, all he needs
Is a little reprogramming.
340
00:21:01,394 --> 00:21:04,431
I'll make a few minor
Adjustments to his personality
Circuits.
341
00:21:04,497 --> 00:21:06,132
But he was a monster.
342
00:21:06,198 --> 00:21:10,269
Well, I will grant
You, subtlety wasn't
His strong point.
343
00:21:11,804 --> 00:21:15,107
But, laura, urkelbot
Was a machine
With feelings.
344
00:21:15,174 --> 00:21:17,276
He fell hopelessly
In love with you.
345
00:21:17,344 --> 00:21:20,980
So let's be honest, the only
Thing he was really guilty of
346
00:21:21,047 --> 00:21:23,383
Was having
Good taste.
347
00:21:26,553 --> 00:21:28,655
That's sweet, steve.
348
00:21:28,721 --> 00:21:30,857
Well, I'm a sweet
Kind of guy, laura.
349
00:21:33,626 --> 00:21:35,061
And it's
My fondest dream
350
00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:38,665
That someday
You'll realize that
And marry me.
351
00:21:38,731 --> 00:21:40,066
Ooh, yeah.
352
00:21:41,768 --> 00:21:43,002
We'll build
A clapboard house
353
00:21:43,069 --> 00:21:44,871
On the banks of the
Susquehanna river.
354
00:21:44,937 --> 00:21:48,174
And we'll have
3.2 children
And 1.7 cars.
355
00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:49,609
And a kittie
And a doggie.
356
00:21:49,676 --> 00:21:51,344
Ooh, you'll make
Lunch every day,
357
00:21:51,411 --> 00:21:52,779
And I'll barbecue
Every night.
358
00:21:52,845 --> 00:21:55,515
And on cold nights,
We'll put on our
Bunny slippers
359
00:21:55,582 --> 00:21:57,016
And listen to
Accordion albums.
360
00:21:57,083 --> 00:21:59,686
Oh, gosh, I've got to
Write this down.
23963
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