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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,523 ♪ come and knock on our door ♪ 2 00:00:13,547 --> 00:00:15,625 ♪ come and knock on our door ♪ 3 00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,627 ♪ we've been waiting for you ♪ 4 00:00:17,651 --> 00:00:19,295 ♪ we've been waiting for you ♪ 5 00:00:19,319 --> 00:00:21,931 ♪ where the kisses are Hers and hers and his ♪ 6 00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:24,200 ♪ three's company too ♪ 7 00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:26,202 ♪ come and dance on our floor ♪ 8 00:00:26,226 --> 00:00:28,204 ♪ come and dance on our floor ♪ 9 00:00:28,228 --> 00:00:31,040 - ♪ take a step that is new ♪ - ♪ take a step that is new ♪ 10 00:00:31,064 --> 00:00:34,143 ♪ we've a lovable space That needs your face ♪ 11 00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:37,046 ♪ three's company too ♪ 12 00:00:37,070 --> 00:00:39,916 ♪ you'll see that Life is a ball again ♪ 13 00:00:39,940 --> 00:00:43,352 ♪ laughter is calling for you ♪ 14 00:00:43,376 --> 00:00:46,456 - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ - ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ 15 00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:49,147 ♪ three's company too ♪ 16 00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:11,448 ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪ 17 00:01:11,472 --> 00:01:13,204 ♪ three's company too. ♪ 18 00:01:18,178 --> 00:01:20,111 Oh come on! 19 00:01:21,448 --> 00:01:23,548 Chrissy! Janet! 20 00:01:32,058 --> 00:01:35,137 Help! My nose is caught! 21 00:01:35,161 --> 00:01:37,139 Janet! 22 00:01:37,163 --> 00:01:39,909 - aah! - hi, jack. What are you doing? 23 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,545 My nose is caught in The doorbell. Come on! 24 00:01:42,569 --> 00:01:44,514 Janet, come here! Look at jack. 25 00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:46,883 - this is really funny. - yeah, it's really funny. 26 00:01:48,909 --> 00:01:51,153 - just please get this out. - yes, okay, alright. 27 00:01:51,177 --> 00:01:53,278 Ow! 28 00:01:54,848 --> 00:01:57,960 Will somebody give me a hand Here? These bottles are heavy. 29 00:01:57,984 --> 00:02:01,230 I always said you couldn't Hold your liquor, jack. 30 00:02:01,254 --> 00:02:03,488 - here. - okay. 31 00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:08,538 My arms have grown six inches! 32 00:02:08,562 --> 00:02:11,430 It's better than if They grew a foot! 33 00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:19,783 Jack, listen, is this all The stuff that you got? 34 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:22,585 - there's more downstairs. I'll go get it. - whatever you do, 35 00:02:22,609 --> 00:02:25,488 Don't let mr. Roper see you. You Know how he feels about parties. 36 00:02:25,512 --> 00:02:27,924 Don't worry, janet. I Learned camouflage 37 00:02:27,948 --> 00:02:29,926 And stalking when I was a boy scout. 38 00:02:29,950 --> 00:02:31,994 Did you get any merit badges? 39 00:02:32,018 --> 00:02:35,086 No, but I got a couple Of campfire girls. 40 00:02:38,725 --> 00:02:41,704 Don't worry, it's an old boy Scout trick it confuses the enemy. 41 00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:43,528 Thank you! 42 00:02:45,365 --> 00:02:47,977 I don't know what we're Going to all this trouble for. 43 00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:50,847 Mr. Roper is bound to find Out we're having a party. 44 00:02:50,871 --> 00:02:53,416 I know, chrissy, but he Won't find out until tonight, 45 00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:56,419 And then it'll be too late For him to do anything about it. 46 00:02:56,443 --> 00:03:00,523 - yeah, but I feel so guilty. - chrissy, we're not doing Anything wrong. 47 00:03:00,547 --> 00:03:02,525 - we're only Having a party. - yeah... 48 00:03:02,549 --> 00:03:04,661 It's the first one We've had in over a year. 49 00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:06,763 - that's true. - yeah. 50 00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:10,700 Our friends have been asking Us to parties all year long, right? 51 00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:13,069 And if we don't invite Them to at least one party, 52 00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:15,738 Then we'll be lucky if We have any friends left. 53 00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:17,473 - you think so? - sure. 54 00:03:17,497 --> 00:03:20,242 Our social life would just Dwindle right down to nothing. 55 00:03:20,266 --> 00:03:23,167 - that's true. - we'd be living Like nuns. 56 00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:26,771 Would that make jack a monk? 57 00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:39,062 - hi, jack. - hi! Hi! Hi! 58 00:03:39,086 --> 00:03:41,064 - hi, mr. Roper. - been shopping? 59 00:03:41,088 --> 00:03:43,066 No, just getting a Couple of snacks. 60 00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:45,501 - a lot of wine there. - well... 61 00:03:45,525 --> 00:03:47,503 That's enough for a whole party. 62 00:03:47,527 --> 00:03:49,438 A party? Oh no, no, no. 63 00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:51,474 It's just some cooking wine. 64 00:03:51,498 --> 00:03:53,977 What are you Cooking, an elephant? 65 00:03:54,001 --> 00:03:58,081 You're so funny! An elephant! 66 00:03:58,105 --> 00:04:00,249 - actually... - let me give you a hand with that. 67 00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:02,351 - oh no, you don't have to. - no, go ahead, jack. 68 00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:04,308 - you don't... - it's okay. 69 00:04:05,846 --> 00:04:08,057 Do we have any of those... 70 00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,627 What do you call them, Those bacon-flavored things? 71 00:04:10,651 --> 00:04:12,450 Pigs? 72 00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:17,199 Jack: mr. Roper, you don't Have to come into the kitchen. 73 00:04:17,223 --> 00:04:19,102 - no, thanks. - it's roper. 74 00:04:19,126 --> 00:04:21,860 - roper? Chrissy, Hide the food! - okay. 75 00:04:30,203 --> 00:04:33,004 - hi! - hi, there! 76 00:04:34,307 --> 00:04:37,286 - what's all this? - oh, it's food. 77 00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:39,456 I know it's food, 78 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:42,392 - but for what? - for eating. 79 00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:44,394 But it's not just for you. 80 00:04:44,418 --> 00:04:46,918 Oh yes, it is! See? 81 00:04:51,825 --> 00:04:53,803 You trying to be funny? 82 00:04:53,827 --> 00:04:55,827 Perish the thought! 83 00:04:59,332 --> 00:05:02,534 - are you Having a party? - a party?! 84 00:05:06,373 --> 00:05:08,418 - not us. - janet: yes. 85 00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:10,720 Oh yes, yes... 86 00:05:10,744 --> 00:05:13,022 Yes, of course, We're having a party. 87 00:05:13,046 --> 00:05:15,291 Why, it's the one We invited you to. 88 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:17,949 Nobody invited me. 89 00:05:20,287 --> 00:05:23,065 Did you forget to call? 90 00:05:23,089 --> 00:05:25,424 Me? 91 00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:29,372 Oh no, I didn't forget to call, 92 00:05:29,396 --> 00:05:32,676 'cause jack was supposed to Call. Did you forget to call? 93 00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:35,745 You kids aren't Fooling me for a minute. 94 00:05:35,769 --> 00:05:38,381 No... What... Mr. Roper, I Was just about to call. 95 00:05:38,405 --> 00:05:40,850 In fact, look, if you Hurry downstairs, 96 00:05:40,874 --> 00:05:42,994 You'll be just in time To answer your phone. 97 00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:46,923 Hold it. Hold it. 98 00:05:46,947 --> 00:05:49,592 I'm going to tell you what I Told you after the last party. 99 00:05:49,616 --> 00:05:51,594 - no more parties! - mr. Roper, 100 00:05:51,618 --> 00:05:53,829 I know our last party Was a little noisy... 101 00:05:53,853 --> 00:05:54,697 A little noisy? 102 00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:57,133 It was a riot! It woke me up. 103 00:05:57,157 --> 00:06:00,559 You know what it takes to Wake me up? Just ask mrs. Roper. 104 00:06:01,895 --> 00:06:04,741 No, no, no, you better not. 105 00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:06,843 Anyway, no more parties! 106 00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:08,912 - but mr. Roper... - no! 107 00:06:08,936 --> 00:06:11,536 That's an order From your landlord! 108 00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:16,352 What do we do? 109 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:19,989 I guess we'll have to Appeal to a higher court. 110 00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:22,158 - mrs. Roper? - exactly. 111 00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:24,761 Now we have to decide which One of us is going to do it. 112 00:06:24,785 --> 00:06:26,718 - okay. - you or chrissy. 113 00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,373 Dumb kids. 114 00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:40,131 Bird: dumb kids. Dumb kids. 115 00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:48,651 You're a good bird. 116 00:06:48,675 --> 00:06:51,187 You're a smart bird too. 117 00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:54,691 We don't like noisy Parties, do we? 118 00:06:55,181 --> 00:06:57,381 Makes our feathers fall out. 119 00:06:58,351 --> 00:07:00,871 Play with your little toy-toy. 120 00:07:01,488 --> 00:07:03,466 Come on. 121 00:07:03,490 --> 00:07:06,335 Say it... "Stanley, Stanley." come on. 122 00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:08,905 "Stanley." 123 00:07:08,929 --> 00:07:10,862 Excuse me. 124 00:07:14,768 --> 00:07:17,279 Oh, it's you. 125 00:07:17,303 --> 00:07:20,249 Listen, if you came down to Try and get me to change my mind, 126 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,284 - you're wasting your time. - I didn't. 127 00:07:22,308 --> 00:07:24,887 I came here to Talk to mrs. Roper. 128 00:07:24,911 --> 00:07:27,151 Oh. Come on in. 129 00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:32,228 Wait a minute. I'm on To your little game. 130 00:07:32,252 --> 00:07:34,731 It's not going to do You any good. No parties! 131 00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:37,100 Well, can I just talk To her for a minute? 132 00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:40,536 I said it won't do you any good. There's only one boss around here. 133 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:44,195 It's not nice to talk About me behind my back. 134 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:48,377 Hi, chrissy. What Brings you here? 135 00:07:48,401 --> 00:07:50,847 Well, mrs. Roper, we're Having a party tonight, 136 00:07:50,871 --> 00:07:54,350 - and we'd like To invite you. - oh, how nice! 137 00:07:54,374 --> 00:07:56,452 Wait a minute. That's not fair. 138 00:07:56,476 --> 00:08:00,322 - I already told them They couldn't have a party. - is that your final word? 139 00:08:00,346 --> 00:08:02,291 - yeah. - good. 140 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,715 Then we won't have to Hear any more from you. 141 00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:10,633 I'd love to come, chrissy. 142 00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,902 - oh good. - and thanks For the invitation. 143 00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:15,293 You're welcome. Bye, mr. Roper. 144 00:08:17,363 --> 00:08:21,610 - helen, you're going Against my wishes. - don't be silly, stanley. 145 00:08:21,634 --> 00:08:24,647 - it's just A little party. - and our wedding service said, 146 00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:27,249 "Love, honor and obey." It didn't say, "Love, honor 147 00:08:27,273 --> 00:08:29,251 And make stanley Look like a jerk"! 148 00:08:29,275 --> 00:08:33,845 That's because god had Already taken care of that part. 149 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,860 You're making me look Foolish in front of the kids. 150 00:08:37,884 --> 00:08:39,963 Now they're gonna be Upstairs laughing at me. 151 00:08:39,987 --> 00:08:43,265 And at 8:00, I'll join them! 152 00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:45,267 No, you won't. 153 00:08:45,291 --> 00:08:47,637 You'll be downstairs, In the bedroom with me! 154 00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:51,629 What's the difference Where I laugh? 155 00:09:02,342 --> 00:09:04,453 It's after 10:00. 156 00:09:04,477 --> 00:09:08,057 - where is everybody? - it's an omen! 157 00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:10,059 If you give a party And nobody shows up, 158 00:09:10,083 --> 00:09:12,195 It means bad luck Is coming your way. 159 00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:15,264 No, chrissy, come on. That's an old wife's tale. 160 00:09:15,288 --> 00:09:17,834 It is not! I heard it From joan frasier, 161 00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:19,791 And she's only 24! 162 00:09:22,295 --> 00:09:25,341 Listen, I have an Idea, okay? Ready? 163 00:09:25,365 --> 00:09:27,644 Why don't we just start The party without them? 164 00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:30,246 - let's do that! - good idea! 165 00:09:30,270 --> 00:09:32,115 Come on, everybody, let's eat! 166 00:09:32,139 --> 00:09:34,183 You know, I really Believe that any minute 167 00:09:34,207 --> 00:09:37,567 All of our friends are just gonna Come barging right through that door! 168 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,659 Or maybe not. 169 00:09:42,683 --> 00:09:45,803 I don't understand what's Happening. They all said they'd come! 170 00:09:47,554 --> 00:09:50,233 - wait a second. Here's a car! - janet: there is? 171 00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:52,601 It's margo and tom! 172 00:09:52,625 --> 00:09:54,971 Yeah, but they're always The last ones to come. 173 00:09:54,995 --> 00:09:58,040 This time they're the first Ones. Maybe it's a surprise party! 174 00:09:59,732 --> 00:10:02,879 Okay, mrs. Roper, let's show them We're gonna have a swinging time! 175 00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:07,449 - oh, why not? - getting down! 176 00:10:07,473 --> 00:10:09,818 What are you doing? 177 00:10:09,842 --> 00:10:12,911 What do we need With other people? 178 00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:17,760 Jack! Hey, jack, they're Getting back in their car! 179 00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:19,661 - are you kidding? - no. 180 00:10:19,685 --> 00:10:21,563 Margo! Tom! 181 00:10:21,587 --> 00:10:23,732 Chrissy, why would they do that? 182 00:10:23,756 --> 00:10:27,316 Maybe they didn't think They were late enough. 183 00:10:31,564 --> 00:10:33,742 Well... 184 00:10:33,766 --> 00:10:36,779 This is sure a lot different Than the last party we threw. 185 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:39,315 - yeah, everybody Came early. - yeah. 186 00:10:39,339 --> 00:10:41,984 Gosh, there must have Been 75 people here. 187 00:10:42,008 --> 00:10:46,477 - remember the bed Collapsed? - really? 188 00:10:47,914 --> 00:10:51,049 - all those coats. - oh yeah. 189 00:10:52,119 --> 00:10:53,696 Hi! 190 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,765 What's the matter? Couldn't you catch them? 191 00:10:55,789 --> 00:10:59,002 No, I caught this instead. This was Stuck to the staircase downstairs. 192 00:10:59,026 --> 00:11:01,337 Hey, wait a minute! Let me see that. 193 00:11:01,361 --> 00:11:03,706 That's stanley's handwriting. 194 00:11:03,730 --> 00:11:06,998 Oh no! 195 00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:10,835 This time, he's gone too far! 196 00:11:14,540 --> 00:11:17,053 - what is it, jack? - what does it say? 197 00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:19,455 "Sorry, folks, party cancelled. 198 00:11:19,479 --> 00:11:22,624 - had to leave town." - aw... 199 00:11:22,648 --> 00:11:26,095 - that... - go ahead, chrissy, say it for all of us! 200 00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:30,188 That... Roper! 201 00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,510 You're not fooling me, you know? 202 00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:44,747 You tried to pretend you Were leaving me once before, 203 00:11:44,771 --> 00:11:48,039 But you couldn't Do it. Remember? 204 00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,142 It was just a bluff. 205 00:11:53,980 --> 00:11:57,340 I know what it is. You're upset, aren't you? 206 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:03,099 I can always tell. It's the Only time you stop talking. 207 00:12:03,123 --> 00:12:05,190 You toad! 208 00:12:07,294 --> 00:12:10,829 Well, that's better. Now we're communicating. 209 00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:14,710 All this just because I stopped the party? 210 00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:19,548 This is just the straw that Broke the camel's back, stanley! 211 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,684 Now I've got to Get away from you. 212 00:12:21,708 --> 00:12:24,987 I'm going to go and Stay with my sister. 213 00:12:25,011 --> 00:12:27,078 Helen, you're just being silly. 214 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:31,149 Helen? 215 00:12:39,392 --> 00:12:42,126 How far are you going To carry this bluff? 216 00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:52,614 Oh, come on, jack. Give it up. 217 00:12:52,638 --> 00:12:55,885 You're not going to get anybody To come back here for a party now. 218 00:12:55,909 --> 00:12:58,542 Yeah, I'm already here And I don't want to come. 219 00:13:00,213 --> 00:13:02,524 Don't worry. This is betty. Betty's crazy about me. 220 00:13:02,548 --> 00:13:05,962 She'll call a couple a girlfriends, They'll call a couple of fellas... 221 00:13:05,986 --> 00:13:08,697 Hello, betty? Jack tripper here. 222 00:13:08,721 --> 00:13:10,632 Hi. No, we're home. 223 00:13:10,656 --> 00:13:13,002 Some practical Joker put up that sign. 224 00:13:13,026 --> 00:13:15,004 The party's still on! 225 00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:17,840 So how about coming Over here right now? 226 00:13:17,864 --> 00:13:20,009 You're undressed and in bed? 227 00:13:20,033 --> 00:13:23,346 Well, how about me coming Over there right now? 228 00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:25,481 Hello, betty? Betty? 229 00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:29,018 Oh boy. 230 00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:31,220 Mr. Roper: open up! 231 00:13:31,244 --> 00:13:33,655 - it's roper! - oh that fink! 232 00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:36,292 - janet: Don't let him in! - of course I'll let him in, 233 00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,961 Then I'm gonna let him have it! 234 00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:41,530 Both: I hope you're happy! 235 00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:44,467 Do you know what you did?! 236 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,568 - you spoiled our party! - my wife left me! 237 00:13:46,592 --> 00:13:48,570 All of our friends... What did you say? 238 00:13:48,594 --> 00:13:51,207 I said my wife left me, And it's all your fault. 239 00:13:51,231 --> 00:13:54,010 - our fault? - yeah, filling her head With those crazy ideas. 240 00:13:54,034 --> 00:13:56,879 - we didn't do Any such thing. - mr. Roper: you must have. 241 00:13:56,903 --> 00:14:00,423 Why would she leave a man Like me if she wasn't crazy? 242 00:14:01,574 --> 00:14:04,353 You're upset now. You're Saying things you don't mean. 243 00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:06,788 Let her stay away. It'll Be a vacation for me. 244 00:14:06,812 --> 00:14:09,052 Come on, you don't mean that. 245 00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:12,294 Why is everybody telling Me what I don't mean?! 246 00:14:12,318 --> 00:14:14,530 I know what I mean. And what I mean is, 247 00:14:14,554 --> 00:14:16,798 I like being alone. 248 00:14:16,822 --> 00:14:20,236 I can do what I feel Like, when I feel like it, 249 00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:23,261 Where I feel like it, And how I feel like it! 250 00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:31,247 I feel hungry. 251 00:14:31,271 --> 00:14:33,282 What? 252 00:14:33,306 --> 00:14:36,807 Helen didn't make me Dinner before she left. 253 00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:44,214 - well... - thanks. 254 00:14:51,758 --> 00:14:53,758 You got a little Wine to go with this? 255 00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:02,211 I finished answering Mrs. Roper's letter. 256 00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:04,880 Did she say anything about When she's coming back? 257 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:08,172 Uh-huh. When pigs grow wings. 258 00:15:12,778 --> 00:15:14,878 That could take weeks. 259 00:15:19,652 --> 00:15:22,698 Yeah, well I hope not. I can't Take much more of roper. 260 00:15:22,722 --> 00:15:25,668 - he's up here All the time. - I know, I know. 261 00:15:25,692 --> 00:15:28,504 - I'm gonna go mail my letter. - oh, janet, wait a second. 262 00:15:28,528 --> 00:15:31,006 Wait. Listen... If You run into roper, 263 00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:34,743 Don't invite him up here. He's not Mooching any more meals off of us. 264 00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:37,613 Jack, you're the one who Invited him up here last time. 265 00:15:37,637 --> 00:15:40,115 What else could I do? 266 00:15:40,139 --> 00:15:42,084 He was standing With a knife and a fork 267 00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:44,286 Sticking out of His shirt pocket! 268 00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:46,555 Roper: anybody home? 269 00:15:46,579 --> 00:15:48,624 Chrissy, get under the couch. 270 00:15:48,648 --> 00:15:50,581 - hey... - get rid of him! 271 00:15:53,319 --> 00:15:55,631 Did somebody say "Come in"? 272 00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:59,223 - I'm going To mail a letter. - well, good good. 273 00:16:06,266 --> 00:16:08,978 Is he gone yet? 274 00:16:09,002 --> 00:16:11,113 No. 275 00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:13,682 Oh, hi, mr. Roper! Get down, chrissy! 276 00:16:13,706 --> 00:16:15,784 Keep looking. 277 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:18,654 It might have rolled Under the couch. 278 00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:20,545 I lost a sock. 279 00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:29,165 - you think It rolled away? - it was in a ball... 280 00:16:29,189 --> 00:16:31,367 Is there anything We can do for you? 281 00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:34,236 - I thought you might Like some company. - oh no, thanks. 282 00:16:34,260 --> 00:16:37,780 That's nice of you, but We're very busy. Keep looking! 283 00:16:41,634 --> 00:16:43,879 Boy, that smells good. 284 00:16:43,903 --> 00:16:45,981 Thank you. It's Just a little dinner. 285 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,750 It's just barely enough For the three of us. 286 00:16:48,774 --> 00:16:51,620 I wasn't hinting for you To give me something to eat. 287 00:16:51,644 --> 00:16:53,556 I have plenty to eat downstairs. 288 00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:56,725 I've got peanut Butter and bread, and... 289 00:16:56,749 --> 00:16:58,860 And a knife. 290 00:16:58,884 --> 00:17:01,230 Well, that's good. 291 00:17:01,254 --> 00:17:03,654 That smells good. 292 00:17:04,990 --> 00:17:08,230 So do you. What are you wearing? 293 00:17:17,203 --> 00:17:20,449 - I think I'll go. - so soon? 294 00:17:20,473 --> 00:17:22,451 Yeah... I got to go. 295 00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:24,342 Okay. 296 00:17:30,149 --> 00:17:33,729 Mr. Roper's starting a New take-out business. 297 00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:36,798 - what? - I've heard of chicken In a bucket, 298 00:17:36,822 --> 00:17:38,834 But I've never seen Chicken in a pocket! 299 00:17:38,858 --> 00:17:40,625 What? 300 00:17:43,596 --> 00:17:45,841 - did you get the letter Off all right? - yeah. 301 00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:47,843 It was real easy. 302 00:17:47,867 --> 00:17:51,513 I stuck it in the slot, opened my Fingers, and it fell right down. 303 00:17:51,537 --> 00:17:53,915 Can I talk to you privately? 304 00:17:53,939 --> 00:17:55,884 Oh well, mr. Roper, I got to get up... 305 00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:57,319 Please? 306 00:17:57,343 --> 00:18:01,078 Oh... Sure. Why not? 307 00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:09,398 Oh. 308 00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:12,934 Here. Sit down. The Place is a mess, isn't it? 309 00:18:12,958 --> 00:18:16,037 It's not so bad. 310 00:18:16,061 --> 00:18:17,906 Helen really used To keep it neat. 311 00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:20,709 - I'll say that For her. - aw... 312 00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:23,479 - you miss her, Don't you? - me? 313 00:18:23,503 --> 00:18:25,781 Nah. Not at all. 314 00:18:25,805 --> 00:18:28,650 - you don't? - no. 315 00:18:28,674 --> 00:18:31,487 But he misses her. 316 00:18:31,511 --> 00:18:34,290 I hear him at Night, lying awake, 317 00:18:34,314 --> 00:18:38,394 Tossing and Turning, missing her. 318 00:18:38,418 --> 00:18:40,362 He likes her, huh? 319 00:18:40,386 --> 00:18:42,431 Now that she's gone, 320 00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:44,433 He realizes how Much he likes her. 321 00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:47,068 How about a telephone Call asking her to come back? 322 00:18:47,092 --> 00:18:49,612 I don't let him use the phone. 323 00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:57,312 Well, you could Call her for his sake. 324 00:18:57,336 --> 00:18:59,715 Janet, tell me something. 325 00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:01,983 If you were helen, 326 00:19:02,007 --> 00:19:05,487 - would you Come back to me? - no. 327 00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:09,057 Well, I mean, no, not the Way you're looking now. 328 00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:11,059 But if you combed your hair, 329 00:19:11,083 --> 00:19:12,750 And you got all dressed up... 330 00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:18,066 - then you'd come back? - I wouldn't. 331 00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:20,591 But she might. Sure, she might. 332 00:19:43,148 --> 00:19:45,794 I look good, huh? 333 00:19:45,818 --> 00:19:48,430 I'm going to go Bring helen back. 334 00:19:48,454 --> 00:19:50,566 I'm going to go to her sister's. 335 00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:53,368 She's going to come out and say, 336 00:19:53,392 --> 00:19:56,605 "Oh stanley!" 337 00:19:56,629 --> 00:19:59,341 And I'm going to say, "Helen... 338 00:19:59,365 --> 00:20:01,298 I love you." 339 00:20:05,237 --> 00:20:08,438 Yeah, what the hell! Helen, I love you! 340 00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:11,987 I'm going to go to the door... 341 00:20:12,011 --> 00:20:13,889 And I'm going to say... 342 00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:16,859 - "You're coming With me, woman!" - I beg your pardon? 343 00:20:16,883 --> 00:20:19,361 Oh I'm sorry. 344 00:20:19,385 --> 00:20:22,430 - you're mrs... From the pet shop. - yes, mrs. Hollins. 345 00:20:22,454 --> 00:20:24,432 Oh, come in. 346 00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:28,169 - I didn't recognize you With your clothes on. - mr. Roper! 347 00:20:28,193 --> 00:20:30,806 I mean, I usually see You with that smock. 348 00:20:30,830 --> 00:20:32,841 You left this Behind at the shop. 349 00:20:32,865 --> 00:20:35,911 - it's the vitamins For your parakeet. - oh. Thank you. 350 00:20:35,935 --> 00:20:38,914 - how's your Parakeet doing? - not too good. 351 00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:41,016 I'm lonely... I mean... 352 00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:42,985 - he's lonely. - aw... 353 00:20:43,009 --> 00:20:44,987 Can I have a look at The poor little thing? 354 00:20:45,011 --> 00:20:46,944 Sure. Sure. 355 00:20:49,448 --> 00:20:53,584 I'm just... I was just so Happy when you called me. 356 00:20:54,787 --> 00:20:56,965 I still can't believe it. 357 00:20:56,989 --> 00:21:00,002 - he really misses me? - oh, mrs. Roper, 358 00:21:00,026 --> 00:21:04,506 At night we hear these gurgling Sobs coming from downstairs. 359 00:21:04,530 --> 00:21:06,864 That's the toilet. 360 00:21:08,634 --> 00:21:10,846 No, that's mr. Roper. 361 00:21:10,870 --> 00:21:14,337 - he's not the man He used to be. - he never was. 362 00:21:15,508 --> 00:21:18,153 The important thing Is, he missed you. 363 00:21:18,177 --> 00:21:22,558 Maybe I have been A little hasty. 364 00:21:22,582 --> 00:21:24,593 Should I give him Another chance? 365 00:21:24,617 --> 00:21:26,884 - is he worth it? - of course! 366 00:21:27,987 --> 00:21:30,231 No, he's not. 367 00:21:30,255 --> 00:21:32,523 But he's mine. 368 00:21:35,060 --> 00:21:37,461 - helen. - stanley... 369 00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:41,899 Stanley, don't say a word now. 370 00:21:42,969 --> 00:21:45,669 Don't say anything. Just listen. 371 00:21:46,739 --> 00:21:51,587 Now... If two people Love each other, 372 00:21:51,611 --> 00:21:55,791 Does it matter whether They like each other? 373 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,759 I mean, all the time. 374 00:21:57,783 --> 00:22:00,784 Isn't that what Love is all about? 375 00:22:02,722 --> 00:22:04,733 Here we are! Nothing Like some vitamins 376 00:22:04,757 --> 00:22:07,836 - to pep a fellow up! - oh. 377 00:22:07,860 --> 00:22:09,638 I didn't know you had company. 378 00:22:09,662 --> 00:22:11,974 - helen, I can explain. - I'm mrs. Hollins. 379 00:22:11,998 --> 00:22:14,198 I just came over to See his little friend. 380 00:22:17,302 --> 00:22:19,302 Oh. 381 00:22:20,540 --> 00:22:22,918 It's not what you Think. You'd better go. 382 00:22:22,942 --> 00:22:25,186 I can straighten out This whole mess, somehow. 383 00:22:25,210 --> 00:22:27,956 - nice meeting you. - likewise. 384 00:22:27,980 --> 00:22:30,526 Bye! 385 00:22:30,550 --> 00:22:33,194 Before you lose your Temper, you got to believe me. 386 00:22:33,218 --> 00:22:36,453 - nothing happened! - I know. 387 00:22:38,524 --> 00:22:40,468 You don't know. I'm a man! 388 00:22:40,492 --> 00:22:42,137 I'm capable. 389 00:22:42,161 --> 00:22:44,294 Given time... 390 00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:48,043 You caught me With another woman. 391 00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:50,311 You should be shocked and upset. 392 00:22:50,335 --> 00:22:53,303 Okay, so I'm shocked and upset. 393 00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,084 That's better. 394 00:22:56,108 --> 00:22:58,787 Come on, stanley, I Didn't come back home 395 00:22:58,811 --> 00:23:02,558 To fight with you. I came back to... 396 00:23:02,582 --> 00:23:04,848 To forgive and forget. 397 00:23:07,186 --> 00:23:09,631 Thank you. 398 00:23:09,655 --> 00:23:11,789 I'm glad you came back. 399 00:23:24,436 --> 00:23:27,082 Thank you, stanley. 400 00:23:27,106 --> 00:23:30,619 And now comes the Best part of the fight. 401 00:23:30,643 --> 00:23:32,588 What's that? 402 00:23:32,612 --> 00:23:35,691 Making up. 403 00:23:35,715 --> 00:23:37,948 Come on, lover. 404 00:23:39,018 --> 00:23:40,784 I knew there was a catch. 405 00:23:52,965 --> 00:23:56,734 These past few days Have been fantastic! 406 00:23:58,137 --> 00:24:01,116 Stanley has been so attentive 407 00:24:01,140 --> 00:24:03,919 And so loving and so romantic! 408 00:24:03,943 --> 00:24:06,343 I feel like a bride On her honeymoon! 409 00:24:08,247 --> 00:24:11,693 - mrs. Roper, That's wonderful. - yeah, I'm so happy for you. 410 00:24:11,717 --> 00:24:15,130 Oh, hey, I got him to Let you give your party! 411 00:24:15,154 --> 00:24:17,032 - you did? - that's fantastic! 412 00:24:17,056 --> 00:24:21,025 - how did you Persuade him to do that? - oh, just a little bribery. 413 00:24:22,094 --> 00:24:25,228 - what did you give him? - a night off. 414 00:24:50,722 --> 00:24:53,235 Ritter's voice: "Three's Company" was videotaped 415 00:24:53,259 --> 00:24:55,192 in front of a studio audience. 31202

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