Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:05,173 --> 00:00:07,408
Ooh, these will make
Great earrings.
2
00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:13,714
Man, fishing in alaska.
I wish I was going.
3
00:00:13,781 --> 00:00:17,518
Yeah, me too.
Then I can have your room.
4
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:21,289
Okay, kids. Come on,
Lets load up the car.
5
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,799
Carl, I'm worried
About those tiny planes.
6
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:35,369
One big gust of wind,
And you're kissing a glacier.
7
00:00:35,436 --> 00:00:38,639
Risk and adventure is the whole
Point of a trip like this.
8
00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:41,909
Still I wouldn't go
All by myself.
9
00:00:41,975 --> 00:00:46,114
Well, I'm off.
10
00:00:46,180 --> 00:00:52,586
With all that dumping, I hope
The fish are still jumping.
11
00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:07,901
* it's a rare condition
In this day and age *
12
00:01:07,968 --> 00:01:11,805
* to read any good news
On the newspaper page *
13
00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:15,109
* and love and tradition
Of the grand design *
14
00:01:15,176 --> 00:01:19,680
* some people say
Is even harder to find *
15
00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:22,916
* well, then, there must
Be some magic clue *
16
00:01:22,983 --> 00:01:26,854
* inside these gentle walls *
17
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:30,491
* 'cause all I see
Is a tower of dreams *
18
00:01:30,558 --> 00:01:34,628
* real love burstin'
Out of every seam *
19
00:01:35,796 --> 00:01:38,566
* as days go by *
20
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:42,803
* we're gonna fill our house
With happiness *
21
00:01:42,870 --> 00:01:45,339
* the moon may cry *
22
00:01:45,406 --> 00:01:49,042
* but we'll smother the blues
With tenderness *
23
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:52,546
* as days go by *
24
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:55,883
* there's room for you
Room for me *
25
00:01:55,949 --> 00:02:00,321
* for gentle hearts
And opportunity *
26
00:02:00,388 --> 00:02:03,524
* as days go by *
27
00:02:03,591 --> 00:02:07,161
* it's the bigger love
Of the family *
28
00:02:22,410 --> 00:02:23,977
I think you'll like
This neighborhood.
29
00:02:24,044 --> 00:02:25,979
Friendly,
Family kind of folks.
30
00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:27,981
Hmm. No wild parties?
31
00:02:28,048 --> 00:02:29,317
Nope.
32
00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:33,554
Darn, and I just
Unpacked everything.
33
00:02:33,621 --> 00:02:37,691
Harriette, there's a car
At the old hansen place.
34
00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:41,295
I guess some sucker
Finally bought
That old shack.
35
00:02:43,063 --> 00:02:44,164
Oh, hi.
36
00:02:44,232 --> 00:02:46,200
Carl, this is
Loretta mckay.
37
00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:49,203
I'm the sucker
Who bought the shack.
38
00:02:52,206 --> 00:02:53,407
Well,
I was just kidding.
39
00:02:53,474 --> 00:02:55,443
It's a fine place.
40
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:57,511
Slap a roof and a floor
On that baby,
41
00:02:57,578 --> 00:03:00,781
And bingo,
You got a house.
42
00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:03,984
Uh, carl usually puts
His best foot forward,
43
00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:06,687
Instead of in his mouth.
44
00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:09,323
Well, sit down.
Let's sit down.
45
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:12,192
If there's anything
I can do to help--
46
00:03:12,260 --> 00:03:13,827
Actually, there is.
47
00:03:13,894 --> 00:03:14,728
Oh?
48
00:03:14,795 --> 00:03:17,431
Her hot water heater
Isn't working.
49
00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:18,999
Does it
Have a resume?
50
00:03:19,066 --> 00:03:20,768
I could ask around.
51
00:03:24,772 --> 00:03:28,276
What can I say?
I'm blessed
With wit.
52
00:03:29,577 --> 00:03:32,513
Come on, loretta.
Let's have a look.
53
00:03:32,580 --> 00:03:34,047
And I'll
Make dinner.
54
00:03:34,114 --> 00:03:35,383
Welcome to the
Neighborhood.
55
00:03:35,449 --> 00:03:37,551
Thanks for the
Coffee, harriette.
56
00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:39,787
You have
A lovely home.
57
00:03:39,853 --> 00:03:40,854
Want to trade?
58
00:03:40,921 --> 00:03:43,757
For that old
Shack? Ha ha.
59
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:48,262
You know,
I really appreciate
This, carl.
60
00:03:48,329 --> 00:03:51,565
Hey,
My pleasure.
61
00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:53,634
Harriette told me
How wonderful you are,
62
00:03:53,701 --> 00:03:57,871
But she didn't mention
You're incredibly
Handsome, too.
63
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:05,413
Hee hee hee hee.
64
00:04:22,496 --> 00:04:25,799
Hi. You ordered
A root beer?
65
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:32,105
You got a sec,
My little pita pocket?
66
00:04:32,172 --> 00:04:33,574
Steve, I'm working.
67
00:04:33,641 --> 00:04:35,843
And the sight
Is sheer poetry.
68
00:04:35,909 --> 00:04:40,013
When you sling hash,
The angels sing.
69
00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:41,214
What do you want,
Steve?
70
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:44,452
I have
A present for you.
71
00:04:44,518 --> 00:04:45,753
"The star registry"?
72
00:04:45,819 --> 00:04:48,622
I've arranged to have
A star named after you.
73
00:04:48,689 --> 00:04:55,563
Celestial object
Number d42750-b-6218
74
00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:58,999
Shall now
And forevermore
Be called "Laura."
75
00:05:02,336 --> 00:05:04,137
Really?
That's kind of neat.
76
00:05:04,204 --> 00:05:06,374
It's only natural
That a heavenly body
77
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:08,842
Be named after
A heavenly body.
78
00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:09,643
Thanks, steve.
79
00:05:09,710 --> 00:05:13,347
I have to admit
I'm touched.
80
00:05:13,414 --> 00:05:15,282
Really,
My little supernova?
81
00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:18,952
Enough to engage
In a little lip wrestling?
82
00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:21,455
Pin me, baby.
83
00:05:21,522 --> 00:05:23,924
I'd rather
Kiss a flagpole
On a winter day.
84
00:05:27,495 --> 00:05:29,029
Can you believe him?
85
00:05:29,096 --> 00:05:30,964
I think
He's sweet.
86
00:05:31,031 --> 00:05:32,366
Excuse me?
87
00:05:32,433 --> 00:05:36,103
And cute.
Excuse me?
88
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,505
You're so lucky.
89
00:05:37,571 --> 00:05:39,673
I wish steve urkel
Liked me.
90
00:05:42,476 --> 00:05:44,645
Don't go away.
I'll be right back.
91
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:45,446
Steve,
We need to talk.
92
00:05:45,513 --> 00:05:47,581
Let's sit down.
93
00:05:47,648 --> 00:05:49,917
What's on your mind,
My cute little comet?
94
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:55,623
Steve, how long
Have we known each other?
95
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:56,924
Nine years,
Three months,
96
00:05:56,990 --> 00:05:58,225
Two weeks,
Four days,
97
00:05:58,291 --> 00:05:59,393
Six hours,
Eight minutes,
98
00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:01,328
And 14 seconds,
99
00:06:01,395 --> 00:06:02,796
15 seconds,
100
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:04,565
16 seconds--
101
00:06:04,632 --> 00:06:06,166
The whole time
We've known each other,
102
00:06:06,233 --> 00:06:09,503
You've been pestering me,
Hoping I'd fall in love
With you.
103
00:06:09,570 --> 00:06:11,271
It's my most
Cherished dream.
104
00:06:11,338 --> 00:06:12,940
Well, wake up.
105
00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:17,478
It's not going to happen.
106
00:06:17,545 --> 00:06:19,346
There's always hope,
Laura.
107
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:21,649
What if we're stranded on
A desert island together?
108
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:24,885
I'm a strong swimmer.
109
00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:27,387
What if I was
The last man on earth
110
00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:29,089
And you were
The last woman?
111
00:06:29,156 --> 00:06:30,591
Mankind would end with us.
112
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,195
So what are you
Trying to say?
113
00:06:35,262 --> 00:06:37,765
I'm saying that
I will never, never,
114
00:06:37,831 --> 00:06:41,569
Ever, ever
Fall in love with you.
115
00:06:41,635 --> 00:06:44,905
Laura, that concept's
Hard to grasp.
116
00:06:45,973 --> 00:06:47,207
Okay, then try this.
117
00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:49,610
A girl over there
Thinks you're sweet
And cute.
118
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:56,517
Whoa, that concept's
Even harder to grasp.
119
00:06:57,518 --> 00:06:58,418
Come on.
120
00:06:58,486 --> 00:06:59,853
Uh-uh.
121
00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:00,888
Come on.
122
00:07:07,628 --> 00:07:09,530
Susie, steve urkel.
123
00:07:09,597 --> 00:07:11,599
Steve, susie crenshaw.
124
00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:20,073
I'm just
A third wheel here,
125
00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:22,576
So I'll just be, uh...
126
00:07:27,848 --> 00:07:29,783
Hi.
127
00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:30,884
Hi.
128
00:07:32,352 --> 00:07:36,690
Laura, is steve
Actually sitting
With another girl?
129
00:07:36,757 --> 00:07:38,592
Yeah.
That's susie.
130
00:07:38,659 --> 00:07:40,861
She actually
Likes steve.
131
00:07:40,928 --> 00:07:44,064
Excuse me?
132
00:07:44,131 --> 00:07:44,832
I got them together,
133
00:07:44,898 --> 00:07:46,667
Hoping
They'd hit it off.
134
00:07:46,734 --> 00:07:49,537
Then maybe
He'd stop bugging you.
135
00:07:49,603 --> 00:07:53,140
That's the plan,
But I don't
Expect it to work.
136
00:07:53,206 --> 00:07:56,844
Did you know an elephant
Can be pregnant
Up to two years?
137
00:07:59,847 --> 00:08:02,650
Did you know
Ancient egyptians
Shaved their eyebrows
138
00:08:02,716 --> 00:08:06,086
To mourn the death
Of their cats?
139
00:08:06,153 --> 00:08:09,056
Gee, I wonder
What they shaved
When a relative died.
140
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:26,039
So me and my partner
Burst through the door,
141
00:08:26,106 --> 00:08:28,008
And there we are,
Standing face to face
142
00:08:28,075 --> 00:08:32,546
With
A united states senator
And his mistress.
143
00:08:32,613 --> 00:08:34,915
Whoo. Did you
Recognize him right away?
144
00:08:34,982 --> 00:08:38,986
Not till he took off
The zorro suit.
145
00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:42,522
Oh, carl, you tell
The most wonderful stories.
146
00:08:42,590 --> 00:08:45,793
I've lived quite a life.
147
00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:48,095
Want to come in
And say hi to harriette?
148
00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:51,464
I've monopolized too much
Of your time already.
149
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,867
But thanks for looking
At my water heater.
150
00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:54,902
My pleasure.
151
00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:56,770
I'm just sorry
I couldn't fix it.
152
00:08:56,837 --> 00:09:00,540
Oh, and
I'm really sorry about
That little explosion.
153
00:09:00,608 --> 00:09:02,009
Oh, don't worry.
154
00:09:02,075 --> 00:09:06,580
That wall needed
To be knocked out anyway.
155
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:08,616
Well, see you later,
Loretta.
156
00:09:08,682 --> 00:09:11,785
Uh, I hope it's
Not too much later.
157
00:09:21,261 --> 00:09:22,730
Hee hee hee hee.
158
00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:33,941
Carl.
159
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:35,308
What?
160
00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:39,613
Do you know
What time it is?
161
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:43,083
Uh...7:30...8:00.
162
00:09:43,150 --> 00:09:45,485
It's 9:06.
163
00:09:45,552 --> 00:09:46,754
You know
The old saying--
164
00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:49,156
Time flies when
You're having--
165
00:09:50,758 --> 00:09:52,292
To fix
A water heater.
166
00:09:53,694 --> 00:09:55,262
Do you realize
You missed dinner?
167
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:56,263
Well, yeah, but, uh--
168
00:09:56,329 --> 00:09:58,098
I made flank steak,
169
00:09:58,165 --> 00:09:59,499
Mashed potatoes,
170
00:09:59,566 --> 00:10:01,134
And butter beans.
171
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:02,235
Oh, honey, good.
172
00:10:02,302 --> 00:10:03,403
I'm starved.
173
00:10:03,470 --> 00:10:05,338
I ate it all.
174
00:10:07,074 --> 00:10:07,875
Oh.
175
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:11,344
Well, I'll
Have a pop tart.
176
00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:13,513
Why didn't you call?
177
00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:15,482
Well, harriette,
She just moved in.
178
00:10:15,548 --> 00:10:16,817
She doesn't have
The phone hooked up yet.
179
00:10:16,884 --> 00:10:19,252
You could
Have walked over.
180
00:10:19,319 --> 00:10:20,921
All the way back--
181
00:10:20,988 --> 00:10:22,622
I should've
Done that.
182
00:10:22,690 --> 00:10:23,991
I should've
Done that.
183
00:10:24,057 --> 00:10:26,694
You do realize
What's happening
Here, don't you?
184
00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:28,561
I think so.
185
00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:29,863
We're having
An argument,
186
00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:33,033
And you ate
My dinner.
187
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:36,536
Carl winslow, you
Are the most naive man.
188
00:10:36,603 --> 00:10:38,672
That woman wants you.
189
00:10:38,739 --> 00:10:41,541
For what?
190
00:10:41,608 --> 00:10:45,312
For the same reason
That senator was
Wearing that zorro suit.
191
00:10:47,447 --> 00:10:49,149
Oh, no!
192
00:10:49,216 --> 00:10:51,952
Oh, yeah!
193
00:10:52,019 --> 00:10:54,221
Harriette,
You're way off base.
194
00:10:54,287 --> 00:10:56,857
I'm a woman.
I know about these things.
195
00:10:56,924 --> 00:10:58,959
I'm a man.
I sense them.
196
00:10:59,026 --> 00:11:00,761
Loretta mckay
Isn't after me.
197
00:11:00,828 --> 00:11:01,995
She thinks of me
198
00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:05,999
As a tip-top,
Number-one,
Fix-it guy.
199
00:11:06,066 --> 00:11:08,001
It's not her
Water heater
200
00:11:08,068 --> 00:11:10,203
She's looking
To get fixed!
201
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:12,706
Well,
Where you going?
202
00:11:12,773 --> 00:11:15,108
To finish off
The pop tarts!
203
00:11:31,124 --> 00:11:32,292
Steve, look.
204
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:35,829
Oh, yeah, sweet knees,
It's our table.
205
00:11:43,103 --> 00:11:44,772
Excuse me.
206
00:11:54,614 --> 00:11:56,383
Thank you, steve.
207
00:11:56,449 --> 00:11:59,419
That's okay
It was my turn.
208
00:12:01,889 --> 00:12:05,058
Steve, you're 15 minutes
Late for work.
209
00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:06,994
I had to cover
Your tables.
210
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:10,630
Sorry. I was shopping
With my suse.
211
00:12:10,697 --> 00:12:13,566
I only introduced
You guys a week ago,
212
00:12:13,633 --> 00:12:15,635
And already
She's your suse?
213
00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:17,905
Laura, I'm busy, okay?
214
00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:20,841
Okay, my little
Crepe suzette,
215
00:12:20,908 --> 00:12:24,211
It's time for
Your daily present.
216
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:29,482
Steve, a locket.
217
00:12:29,549 --> 00:12:31,218
It's beautiful.
218
00:12:31,284 --> 00:12:32,786
Only when
You wear it.
219
00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:36,023
Oh, urkie.
220
00:12:36,857 --> 00:12:38,826
Oh, please.
221
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:45,565
Laura?
222
00:12:45,632 --> 00:12:47,400
You okay, honey?
223
00:12:47,467 --> 00:12:48,668
I'm fine.
224
00:12:48,735 --> 00:12:50,770
Oh, good. 'cause
For a moment over there,
225
00:12:50,838 --> 00:12:53,340
It looked like you
Were a little jealous.
226
00:12:53,406 --> 00:12:55,708
But that's silly, right?
227
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,945
Right.
228
00:13:10,690 --> 00:13:12,525
Mother winslow,
What time is it?
229
00:13:12,592 --> 00:13:15,929
One minute later
Than the last time
You asked me.
230
00:13:18,932 --> 00:13:21,869
Carl's been at loretta's
Over an hour.
231
00:13:21,935 --> 00:13:24,637
How long can it take
To fix a leaky faucet?
232
00:13:24,704 --> 00:13:28,976
Carl's doing it,
So it might take
Two, three months.
233
00:13:32,913 --> 00:13:35,148
You're upset
With him,
Aren't you?
234
00:13:35,215 --> 00:13:36,349
A little.
235
00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:38,952
I could tell.
For the past week,
236
00:13:39,019 --> 00:13:41,554
You been eating up
All his favorite foods.
237
00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:47,694
Mother winslow,
I'm worried about
Loretta mckay.
238
00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:49,029
I don't
Blame you.
239
00:13:49,096 --> 00:13:53,033
That floozy's
Trying to steal
Your husband.
240
00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:54,534
You think so, too?
241
00:13:54,601 --> 00:13:57,604
I've seen
Her kind before.
242
00:13:57,670 --> 00:14:01,708
She's
A man-burglar.
243
00:14:01,774 --> 00:14:05,178
Should I lock up carl
Or knock loretta
Upside the head?
244
00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:07,547
No, you do
Something else,
245
00:14:07,614 --> 00:14:09,349
Something
Much harder.
246
00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:10,850
What's that?
247
00:14:10,918 --> 00:14:13,853
Honey, you trust
Your husband.
248
00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:19,526
Hello, steve?
Sorry to get you
Out of the shower.
249
00:14:19,592 --> 00:14:21,929
Could you come over
Tomorrow morning?
250
00:14:21,995 --> 00:14:25,132
We need to talk.
It's no big deal,
251
00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:27,634
But I'd feel better
If I get it--
252
00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:36,143
I would've
Been here sooner,
253
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:38,411
But my mom made me
Put on a towel.
254
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:42,415
What did you want
To talk to me about?
255
00:14:42,482 --> 00:14:44,584
You and the suse.
256
00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:46,486
Ohh.
257
00:14:46,553 --> 00:14:49,856
Is it possible
That the green-eyed
Monster of jealousy
258
00:14:49,923 --> 00:14:52,559
Is rearing
Its ugly head?
259
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:53,560
Actually, it was.
260
00:14:53,626 --> 00:14:54,261
Aha!
261
00:14:54,327 --> 00:14:56,629
For a second.
262
00:14:56,696 --> 00:14:58,098
Hmm.
263
00:14:58,165 --> 00:15:01,101
When you called
Susie pet names
And gave her gifts--
264
00:15:01,168 --> 00:15:04,071
You were willing
To do anything,
Even murder,
265
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:06,606
To win me back.
266
00:15:06,673 --> 00:15:09,676
Steve, I'm talking.
267
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:11,945
Oh, sorry.
268
00:15:12,012 --> 00:15:15,915
Pay attention
Because this is
Hard to explain.
269
00:15:15,983 --> 00:15:18,385
Steve, ever since
We've met,
270
00:15:18,451 --> 00:15:22,922
You've been
Like a...Whining,
Buzzing mosquito.
271
00:15:23,790 --> 00:15:24,958
I keep swatting
At you,
272
00:15:25,025 --> 00:15:27,294
But you refuse
To be squashed.
273
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,963
That's me--
The unsquashable urkel.
274
00:15:32,032 --> 00:15:34,534
Then you started
Buzzing around susie.
275
00:15:34,601 --> 00:15:37,337
And for a second,
I actually almost missed
276
00:15:37,404 --> 00:15:40,107
Your obnoxious,
Grating presence.
277
00:15:41,374 --> 00:15:45,278
Then I came to my senses
And asked you over
278
00:15:45,345 --> 00:15:48,448
To tell you I'm happy
For you and susie.
279
00:15:48,515 --> 00:15:52,085
In fact, you guys
Are the perfect couple.
280
00:15:52,152 --> 00:15:54,454
Oh, well,
Actually...
281
00:15:55,855 --> 00:15:57,524
We're
An ex-couple.
282
00:15:57,590 --> 00:15:58,658
Say what?
283
00:15:58,725 --> 00:16:00,060
Well, a week ago,
284
00:16:00,127 --> 00:16:03,263
Susie was a shy,
Fragile flower
Afraid to open.
285
00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:05,732
But I applied a
Generous sprinkling
286
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:06,799
Of urkel
Miracle grow,
287
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:10,370
And lo and behold,
She blossomed.
288
00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:12,805
And I'm proud to say
An hour ago,
289
00:16:12,872 --> 00:16:16,009
I introduced susie
To the captain
Of the chess club.
290
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:18,011
What? You went
Through all that trouble
291
00:16:18,078 --> 00:16:19,146
Bringing her
Out of her shell
292
00:16:19,212 --> 00:16:22,282
Just to lose her
To doyle easterwood?
293
00:16:22,349 --> 00:16:27,520
That was my intention
All along.
294
00:16:27,587 --> 00:16:30,490
However,
My masterful plan
295
00:16:30,557 --> 00:16:31,891
Seems to have had a...
296
00:16:31,958 --> 00:16:34,727
Serendipitous
Side effect.
297
00:16:38,698 --> 00:16:39,532
You missed me.
298
00:16:39,599 --> 00:16:40,867
For a second.
299
00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:43,070
Long enough
To give me hope.
300
00:16:43,136 --> 00:16:45,805
I love you,
Laura.
301
00:16:45,872 --> 00:16:46,906
Go home, steve.
302
00:16:46,973 --> 00:16:49,742
Ah, yes!
Music to my ears.
303
00:16:49,809 --> 00:16:50,977
How about a movie
Friday?
304
00:16:51,044 --> 00:16:52,312
Drop dead.
305
00:16:52,379 --> 00:16:56,049
Talk to me, baby.
Let's seal it
With a kiss.
306
00:16:58,585 --> 00:16:59,519
I'd rather throw up.
307
00:16:59,586 --> 00:17:03,690
Ah, yes! Bang! Zap!
I'm on fire!
308
00:17:03,756 --> 00:17:07,427
Fortunately,
I have a cold
Shower waiting.
309
00:17:07,494 --> 00:17:11,264
Ah, yes! The smell
Of fresh door
In my face!
310
00:17:16,669 --> 00:17:19,072
Well, here we are.
311
00:17:19,139 --> 00:17:22,209
Thank you
For walking
Me home...Again.
312
00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:24,877
Thank you for looking
At my leaky faucet.
313
00:17:24,944 --> 00:17:25,978
My pleasure.
314
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:28,781
I'm sorry
I couldn't fix it.
315
00:17:31,084 --> 00:17:33,820
And I'm real sorry
About that
Little flood.
316
00:17:35,122 --> 00:17:37,457
Hey, I always
Wanted a jacuzzi.
317
00:17:40,927 --> 00:17:41,994
Oh!
318
00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:44,297
I brought this all
The way over here
319
00:17:44,364 --> 00:17:47,033
And almost forgot
To give it to you.
320
00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:49,869
Oh, what's this?
321
00:17:49,936 --> 00:17:52,239
Just
A little thank you
322
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:55,875
For all the things
You tried to fix.
323
00:17:55,942 --> 00:17:58,478
Oh.
324
00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:01,748
Musical underwear?
325
00:18:01,814 --> 00:18:03,516
Yeah!
326
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:07,487
They play only you
By the platters.
327
00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:10,857
I hope you don't
Already have them.
328
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:11,824
No, no.
329
00:18:11,891 --> 00:18:13,860
This is
My very first pair
330
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:15,995
Of singing underpants.
331
00:18:16,062 --> 00:18:17,797
Oh.
332
00:18:18,498 --> 00:18:19,999
Whew.
333
00:18:20,066 --> 00:18:22,902
You know, loretta,
334
00:18:22,969 --> 00:18:25,938
This is an awfully
Personal gift.
335
00:18:26,005 --> 00:18:27,540
Are you embarrassed?
336
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,709
Well, a little.
337
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:32,245
Would you like
To come over
To my place
338
00:18:32,312 --> 00:18:35,114
And try them on?
339
00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:41,188
Say what?
340
00:18:41,254 --> 00:18:43,623
You know,
Model them for me?
341
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:49,162
Am I making you
Nervous?
342
00:18:49,229 --> 00:18:51,598
Oh, no, no.
343
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:53,500
Ooh!
344
00:18:55,268 --> 00:18:56,969
A little.
345
00:18:57,036 --> 00:19:00,207
Carl, don't you think
I'm attractive?
346
00:19:00,273 --> 00:19:03,009
Oh, I think
You're very
Attractive...
347
00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:05,144
Very, very
Attractive.
348
00:19:05,212 --> 00:19:07,647
Stay there.
349
00:19:08,448 --> 00:19:10,149
Carl, what's the matter?
350
00:19:10,217 --> 00:19:13,553
Loretta,
I'm a married man.
351
00:19:13,620 --> 00:19:15,322
Yeah?
352
00:19:16,223 --> 00:19:18,325
Doesn't that
Bother you?
353
00:19:18,391 --> 00:19:19,426
I just thought
We could have
A little fun.
354
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:22,462
Now, loretta,
Stop that.
355
00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:26,466
Look, I can't
Cheat on my wife.
356
00:19:26,533 --> 00:19:27,534
I'm sorry.
357
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:30,870
You're just going
To have to find yourself
358
00:19:30,937 --> 00:19:33,540
Another handyman.
359
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:38,144
Too bad.
360
00:19:38,211 --> 00:19:40,747
Your loss.
361
00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:57,764
Hi, honey.
362
00:19:57,830 --> 00:19:59,165
Carl.
363
00:19:59,232 --> 00:20:02,569
So. Did you fix
Whatever loretta wanted?
364
00:20:04,371 --> 00:20:06,339
Sweetheart,
You were right.
365
00:20:06,406 --> 00:20:08,708
That woman
Made a pass at me.
366
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:09,609
And?
367
00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:13,613
Hey, I shut her
Down cold.
368
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,815
Oh. Really?
369
00:20:15,882 --> 00:20:18,918
Yeah. Go ahead,
Dust her body
For fingerprints.
370
00:20:18,985 --> 00:20:21,921
You won't find mine.
371
00:20:23,022 --> 00:20:25,258
I'm glad.
372
00:20:25,325 --> 00:20:26,959
Oh, sweetheart...
373
00:20:28,127 --> 00:20:32,198
Look, I'm sorry
I made you worry.
374
00:20:32,265 --> 00:20:33,933
You tried to warn me
About loretta,
375
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,669
But I didn't
Listen to you.
376
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:40,673
I guess
I underestimated my
Irresistible charm,
377
00:20:40,740 --> 00:20:44,277
My killer
Good looks,
378
00:20:44,344 --> 00:20:48,415
My awesome
Animal magnetism.
379
00:20:51,918 --> 00:20:55,788
Let's face it.
The woman would have
Jumped a scarecrow.
380
00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:00,360
Harriette?
381
00:21:01,060 --> 00:21:03,896
Well, honey,
382
00:21:03,963 --> 00:21:06,833
What's
The matter?
383
00:21:06,899 --> 00:21:08,968
Harriette.
384
00:21:09,869 --> 00:21:12,171
Well...
385
00:21:12,238 --> 00:21:14,541
I guess
I'm just relieved.
386
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:17,477
Loretta's
An attractive woman,
387
00:21:17,544 --> 00:21:20,079
And I was scared,
Well,
388
00:21:20,146 --> 00:21:22,682
That you'd give
Into temptation
389
00:21:22,749 --> 00:21:26,486
And that...
I'd have to kill you.
390
00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:32,091
Sweetheart,
Listen to me.
391
00:21:32,158 --> 00:21:34,327
You are
The only woman
392
00:21:34,394 --> 00:21:38,798
That I'll ever want
Now and forever.
393
00:21:38,865 --> 00:21:40,299
Oh, carl.
394
00:21:44,871 --> 00:21:46,773
[music plays]
395
00:21:49,108 --> 00:21:53,713
* only you *
396
00:21:53,780 --> 00:21:57,950
* can make this world
Seem right *
397
00:22:00,387 --> 00:22:03,856
* only you *
398
00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:04,891
[music stops]
399
00:22:12,565 --> 00:22:15,602
Was that music
Coming from your pants?
400
00:22:20,239 --> 00:22:21,107
Let's
Go upstairs.
401
00:22:21,173 --> 00:22:23,543
I'll explain it
To you.
402
00:22:27,213 --> 00:22:29,348
[music plays]
27243
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
