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In last week's episode of Soap,
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00:00:04,070 --> 00:00:05,571
Carol told Jodie
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00:00:05,572 --> 00:00:07,072
she'd love to marry him.
4
00:00:07,073 --> 00:00:09,575
But Carol's father wasnot in love with the idea.
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00:00:09,576 --> 00:00:12,077
Chester is coming hometo his loved ones
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00:00:12,078 --> 00:00:14,079
and would love it if he knewwho they were.
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00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:17,082
Mary's professor would loveto see more of Mary...
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00:00:17,083 --> 00:00:18,083
but Mary would love it
9
00:00:18,084 --> 00:00:20,085
if her professor wouldleave her alone.
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00:00:20,086 --> 00:00:22,087
Burt has met Mary's professor
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00:00:22,088 --> 00:00:24,089
and would love Maryto leave school.
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00:00:24,090 --> 00:00:26,091
Eunice would loveto see more of Dutch,
13
00:00:26,092 --> 00:00:27,593
who she loves, but she can't,
14
00:00:27,594 --> 00:00:29,595
because Dutch isrunning from the police
15
00:00:29,596 --> 00:00:30,596
who would love to catch him.
16
00:00:30,597 --> 00:00:33,098
Elaine told Danny she loves him
17
00:00:33,099 --> 00:00:36,101
and hopes it's not too latefor him to love her too.
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00:00:36,102 --> 00:00:37,603
Danny would love to love her.
19
00:00:37,604 --> 00:00:40,105
And Sally told Burtshe loves him,
20
00:00:40,106 --> 00:00:42,608
and she'd love to be his lover.
21
00:00:42,609 --> 00:00:44,109
Confused?
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00:00:44,110 --> 00:00:46,112
You won't be afterthis week's episode of... Soap.
23
00:00:52,118 --> 00:00:54,119
This is the storyof two sisters,
24
00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:56,121
Jessica Tate,
25
00:00:56,122 --> 00:00:58,624
and Mary Campbell.
26
00:00:59,626 --> 00:01:02,127
These are the Tates...
27
00:01:02,128 --> 00:01:05,631
and these are the Campbells.
28
00:01:05,632 --> 00:01:09,135
And this is Soap.
29
00:01:37,163 --> 00:01:40,165
So you see, colonel,
if we leave before dusk,
30
00:01:40,166 --> 00:01:42,167
we could seize and destroy
that bunker.
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00:01:42,168 --> 00:01:44,169
And that would be
a good thing to do, you say.
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00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:45,671
It's the only logical step
33
00:01:45,672 --> 00:01:48,674
in the liberation of France.
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00:01:48,675 --> 00:01:49,675
Bentley...
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00:01:50,677 --> 00:01:52,678
Could you help me?
Sure.
36
00:01:52,679 --> 00:01:54,179
My wife
will be down in a moment.
37
00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:56,182
Oh.
What does she look like?
38
00:01:57,684 --> 00:02:00,686
Dumpy broad, short black hair...
39
00:02:00,687 --> 00:02:02,188
nose like a fish.
40
00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:04,690
What's her name?
41
00:02:04,691 --> 00:02:06,191
Eric.
42
00:02:06,192 --> 00:02:08,193
Thanks.
43
00:02:08,194 --> 00:02:09,695
The bunker, colonel.
44
00:02:09,696 --> 00:02:13,198
Major, are you sure
that I'm "Colonel" Tate?
45
00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:15,201
Positive, sir.
46
00:02:17,203 --> 00:02:18,204
Boland...
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00:02:21,708 --> 00:02:22,708
What is that?
Steak.
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00:02:22,709 --> 00:02:23,709
It's burnt!
49
00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,211
You like it that way.
50
00:02:27,213 --> 00:02:28,714
Good morning, darling.
51
00:02:28,715 --> 00:02:30,716
Ah, Monica. Right?
52
00:02:30,717 --> 00:02:33,218
Jessica.
53
00:02:33,219 --> 00:02:35,220
Chester, dear.
I'm your wife.
54
00:02:35,221 --> 00:02:39,225
You are? Hey, great.
55
00:02:41,227 --> 00:02:42,728
We get along, don't we?
56
00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,730
Yes.
57
00:02:44,731 --> 00:02:45,971
How are you feeling today, Dad?
58
00:02:46,733 --> 00:02:47,733
Dad?
59
00:02:47,734 --> 00:02:50,235
I just introduced myself to him
in the bathroom.
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00:02:50,236 --> 00:02:52,237
But darling,
he only remembers things
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00:02:52,238 --> 00:02:53,739
for a little while.
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00:02:53,740 --> 00:02:56,241
About five seconds.
63
00:02:56,242 --> 00:02:57,242
This is Billy, Chester.
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00:02:57,243 --> 00:03:00,746
Oh... Billy Chester.
65
00:03:00,747 --> 00:03:03,248
No, I'm your son, Billy.
66
00:03:03,249 --> 00:03:06,752
My son? My own son.
67
00:03:06,753 --> 00:03:09,254
Oh, what a wonderful thing.
68
00:03:09,255 --> 00:03:11,257
A son, Geraldine.
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00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:15,761
A fine, strong son.
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00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:17,763
Oh, Billy...
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00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:19,765
Bill.
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00:03:19,766 --> 00:03:21,266
♪ My boy, Bill ♪
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00:03:21,267 --> 00:03:24,269
♪ Will be as strong
And as tall as a tree ♪
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00:03:24,270 --> 00:03:26,271
♪ My Bill ♪
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00:03:26,272 --> 00:03:28,774
Have a seat, son.
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00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:31,276
Smoke?
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00:03:31,277 --> 00:03:32,277
No, thanks.
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00:03:32,278 --> 00:03:35,280
Keep it from the rest
of the troops,
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00:03:35,281 --> 00:03:36,782
but the colonel is a lunatic.
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00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:39,284
Good morning.
81
00:03:39,285 --> 00:03:41,286
Good morning.
Have we met?
82
00:03:41,287 --> 00:03:43,789
Begging the colonel's pardon,
sir,
83
00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:44,790
but what about our mission?
84
00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:48,294
Oh! Oh, quite right, major.
Quite right.
85
00:03:52,298 --> 00:03:54,800
Promise me you'll be here
when I return, Marjorie.
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00:03:54,801 --> 00:03:55,801
Yes.
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00:03:55,802 --> 00:03:56,802
Well, I'm off.
88
00:03:56,803 --> 00:03:58,805
I'll say.
89
00:04:00,306 --> 00:04:02,307
♪ When Johnny comes
Marching home again ♪
90
00:04:02,308 --> 00:04:04,810
♪ Hurrah, hurrah ♪
91
00:04:04,811 --> 00:04:07,312
A real loony.
92
00:04:07,313 --> 00:04:09,815
Mother, what are we
gonna do about Daddy?
93
00:04:09,816 --> 00:04:11,316
What do you mean?
94
00:04:11,317 --> 00:04:13,318
I think he needs to be somewhere
95
00:04:13,319 --> 00:04:15,320
where he can get proper care.
96
00:04:15,321 --> 00:04:16,822
He can't get that here.
97
00:04:16,823 --> 00:04:18,323
Maybe there's some place
98
00:04:18,324 --> 00:04:20,325
that has some sort of therapy
that could help him.
99
00:04:20,326 --> 00:04:22,327
Oh, Eunice.
100
00:04:22,328 --> 00:04:26,832
You mean put Daddy away...
in an institution?
101
00:04:26,833 --> 00:04:28,333
But darling, the doctor said
102
00:04:28,334 --> 00:04:30,836
that he might snap out of it
any time.
103
00:04:31,838 --> 00:04:32,838
And maybe not.
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00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:36,842
Eunice, I don't
want him to come out of it
105
00:04:36,843 --> 00:04:38,844
with a bunch of strangers.
106
00:04:38,845 --> 00:04:40,345
I mean, if he looks up
107
00:04:40,346 --> 00:04:42,848
and sees a bunch of faces
he doesn't recognize,
108
00:04:42,849 --> 00:04:45,351
he might not know
he's come out of it.
109
00:04:53,359 --> 00:04:57,362
Dad and Gramps just blew up
Mr. Kirby's garage.
110
00:04:57,363 --> 00:05:01,366
Mr. Kirby's going
to be very upset.
111
00:05:01,367 --> 00:05:03,869
Especially since he was
parking his car at the time.
112
00:05:14,380 --> 00:05:16,381
Here it is.
I packed it up for you.
113
00:05:16,382 --> 00:05:17,382
Thanks.
114
00:05:17,383 --> 00:05:18,383
I think everything is here.
115
00:05:18,384 --> 00:05:19,885
Great. Uh, before I forget,
116
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,887
I wanna give you back your key.
117
00:05:21,888 --> 00:05:22,888
Why don't you keep it?
118
00:05:22,889 --> 00:05:24,389
What am I gonna do with it?
119
00:05:24,390 --> 00:05:26,391
Well, you never know.
Maybe someday, you'll...
120
00:05:26,392 --> 00:05:27,893
Then I'll ring the bell.
121
00:05:27,894 --> 00:05:28,894
Just because
you're getting married
122
00:05:28,895 --> 00:05:30,395
doesn't mean we have to stop...
123
00:05:30,396 --> 00:05:31,396
It does.
124
00:05:31,397 --> 00:05:32,397
Come on.
125
00:05:32,398 --> 00:05:34,399
My blue v-neck. You know,
I thought I lost that.
126
00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:36,902
Listen, you know
a lot of guys have mistresses.
127
00:05:36,903 --> 00:05:38,404
You'll have me.
128
00:05:39,906 --> 00:05:41,406
But that is not mine, Dennis.
129
00:05:41,407 --> 00:05:42,407
That is yours.
130
00:05:42,408 --> 00:05:43,408
No, it isn't.
131
00:05:43,409 --> 00:05:44,910
Well, it's not mine.
132
00:05:44,911 --> 00:05:46,912
Sure, it is. You bought it
at the flea market.
133
00:05:46,913 --> 00:05:50,415
Dennis, never in my life
have I bought a ceramic hippo.
134
00:05:50,416 --> 00:05:51,416
It's yours.
135
00:05:51,417 --> 00:05:52,918
Why is it mine?
Because you hate it?
136
00:05:52,919 --> 00:05:53,919
Fine. It's not yours, it's mine.
137
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:55,921
I love it.
I wish I had two.
138
00:05:55,922 --> 00:05:56,922
All right, I'll keep the hippo.
139
00:05:56,923 --> 00:05:59,424
If you think she won't like
the hippo, I'll take it.
140
00:05:59,425 --> 00:06:00,926
It has nothing to do with her.
141
00:06:00,927 --> 00:06:02,427
Hey,
it doesn't go with her decor.
142
00:06:02,428 --> 00:06:03,929
I understand.
143
00:06:03,930 --> 00:06:05,431
It clashes with Early Uptight.
144
00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:07,933
Goodbye, Dennis.
145
00:06:07,934 --> 00:06:09,434
Jodie, wait. I'm
sorry. Please, wait.
146
00:06:09,435 --> 00:06:11,436
What do you want me to do,
crawl?
147
00:06:11,437 --> 00:06:13,438
I mean, I rebuff you
just one little time...
148
00:06:13,439 --> 00:06:15,440
Rebuffed?
149
00:06:15,441 --> 00:06:16,942
You got married.
150
00:06:16,943 --> 00:06:18,944
Well, still, how long are you
gonna make me pay for it?
151
00:06:18,945 --> 00:06:20,946
That's not what I'm doing,
Dennis.
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00:06:20,947 --> 00:06:22,447
That's not what I'm doing
at all.
153
00:06:22,448 --> 00:06:24,449
Oh, come on. Don't tell me
you're marrying Carol
154
00:06:24,450 --> 00:06:25,450
because you've
suddenly gone straight.
155
00:06:25,451 --> 00:06:27,953
No, I'm marrying her
partly because I should
156
00:06:27,954 --> 00:06:29,454
and partly because I want to.
157
00:06:29,455 --> 00:06:31,457
And what about us?
I thought you loved me.
158
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:34,960
I do.
159
00:06:36,462 --> 00:06:38,964
Then how can you marry her?
160
00:06:38,965 --> 00:06:40,966
Dennis, she's having my baby.
161
00:06:40,967 --> 00:06:43,468
So she's having your baby.
So what?
162
00:06:43,469 --> 00:06:44,970
And, anyway,
how do you know it's yours?
163
00:06:44,971 --> 00:06:46,471
It's mine.
164
00:06:46,472 --> 00:06:47,472
I mean, it could be anybody's.
165
00:06:47,473 --> 00:06:48,473
It probably is.
166
00:06:48,474 --> 00:06:49,975
Dennis, come on.
167
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:51,977
Jodie, the little slut
has got more guys jumping her
168
00:06:51,978 --> 00:06:52,979
than the hurdles.
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00:06:55,481 --> 00:06:57,983
And you're gonna
be the jerk that supports her.
170
00:06:57,984 --> 00:06:59,985
Well, I hope you're happy
with spit-up on your shoulder
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00:06:59,986 --> 00:07:01,146
and a milkman with your wife.
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00:07:21,007 --> 00:07:22,007
Eunice.
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00:07:26,012 --> 00:07:27,513
Eunice!
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00:07:28,514 --> 00:07:29,515
Damn!
175
00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:34,019
Dutch!
176
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:35,020
Eunice, is that you?
177
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:37,022
Who is it, please?
178
00:07:37,023 --> 00:07:39,024
What do you mean, who is it?
It's me.
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00:07:39,025 --> 00:07:40,525
Dutch!
180
00:07:40,526 --> 00:07:42,027
Eunice, keep it down, will you?
181
00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:44,529
We don't want the whole
world to know we're up here.
182
00:07:44,530 --> 00:07:46,031
Oh, it's okay.
Only Mrs. Mendelbaum knows.
183
00:07:46,032 --> 00:07:47,532
Who's Mrs. Mendelbaum?
184
00:07:47,533 --> 00:07:49,034
She's the super
of this building.
185
00:07:49,035 --> 00:07:51,036
She buzzed me in.
Didn't she buzz you in?
186
00:07:51,037 --> 00:07:52,537
Eunice,
I just escaped from prison.
187
00:07:52,538 --> 00:07:53,539
Nobody has to buzz me in.
188
00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:59,044
Eunice, what are you
doing on that roof?
189
00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:01,046
You said to meet you on a roof.
190
00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:03,048
So here I am, on a roof...
meeting.
191
00:08:03,049 --> 00:08:06,051
Eunice, I said
814 Delancey Street.
192
00:08:06,052 --> 00:08:07,052
You're on 816 Delancey Street!
193
00:08:07,053 --> 00:08:09,554
You said 816 Delancey Street.
194
00:08:09,555 --> 00:08:10,555
No, I didn't.
195
00:08:10,556 --> 00:08:12,557
Yes, you did.
You said 816 Delaney Street.
196
00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:14,059
I know this
197
00:08:14,060 --> 00:08:15,560
because your birthday is
August 16th.
198
00:08:15,561 --> 00:08:16,561
Eight-sixteen, see?
199
00:08:16,562 --> 00:08:19,564
Eunice, my birthday is
August the 14th.
200
00:08:19,565 --> 00:08:22,067
Oh! Oh...
201
00:08:22,068 --> 00:08:25,071
Well, Dutch,
come over to my roof, okay?
202
00:08:27,573 --> 00:08:28,934
No, Eunice. It's
better this way...
203
00:08:30,076 --> 00:08:31,076
because this is goodbye.
204
00:08:31,077 --> 00:08:33,078
What?
205
00:08:33,079 --> 00:08:34,079
This is goodbye.
206
00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:35,580
Are you crazy?
207
00:08:35,581 --> 00:08:38,083
You call me down to a slum
in the middle of the night
208
00:08:38,084 --> 00:08:39,084
for goodbye?
209
00:08:39,085 --> 00:08:40,585
Well, yeah.
210
00:08:40,586 --> 00:08:43,588
I come down here
on a subway full of flashers,
211
00:08:43,589 --> 00:08:47,092
right into the middle
of junkie heaven for goodbye?
212
00:08:48,094 --> 00:08:49,594
Stay right there, Dutch.
213
00:08:49,595 --> 00:08:51,596
Don't move from your roof.
214
00:08:51,597 --> 00:08:54,599
I'm coming right over there
to push you off.
215
00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:56,101
Eunice! Eunice!
This is crazy.
216
00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:58,603
You can't be involved with me.
It's no good for you.
217
00:08:58,604 --> 00:09:00,105
And if I'm with you,
I'm gonna get caught.
218
00:09:00,106 --> 00:09:01,606
Don't worry about it.
219
00:09:01,607 --> 00:09:03,108
In another two minutes,
you're gonna be dead!
220
00:09:03,109 --> 00:09:05,110
Eunice! Don't try
to come across there.
221
00:09:05,111 --> 00:09:07,112
You could fall!
222
00:09:07,113 --> 00:09:09,114
Eunice? Eunice,
what is it?
223
00:09:09,115 --> 00:09:10,615
I'm scared of heights, Dutch.
224
00:09:10,616 --> 00:09:12,117
Stay right there.
225
00:09:12,118 --> 00:09:13,118
Oh, I feel nauseous.
226
00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:14,119
Don't move.
227
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,120
What if I throw up?
228
00:09:15,121 --> 00:09:16,121
Don't look down.
229
00:09:16,122 --> 00:09:18,623
Oh, I hate you!
230
00:09:18,624 --> 00:09:20,125
Eunice, I love you.
231
00:09:20,126 --> 00:09:21,626
Yeah, you love me so much
you're leaving me.
232
00:09:21,627 --> 00:09:23,128
But I'm doing it for you.
233
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:24,129
I'm leaving you for you.
234
00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:25,630
Don't do me any favors.
235
00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:28,633
I don't want you to leave me.
I hate you.
236
00:09:28,634 --> 00:09:30,635
No, I don't. I love you.
237
00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:33,638
Okay. Okay.
I won't do it.
238
00:09:33,639 --> 00:09:34,720
I'll take you with me.
Oh...
239
00:09:40,646 --> 00:09:41,646
Dutch.
Eunice.
240
00:09:41,647 --> 00:09:42,647
Oh, Dutch...
241
00:09:42,648 --> 00:09:45,650
Eunice, we're six stories up.
242
00:09:45,651 --> 00:09:47,152
We can't make love in mid-air.
243
00:09:47,153 --> 00:09:49,155
What do you think,
I'm a dragonfly?
244
00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:52,157
Back up, honey.
245
00:09:52,158 --> 00:09:53,158
Okay, darling.
246
00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:54,159
Listen, here's the plan.
247
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:56,161
My grandmother
has a little farm,
248
00:09:56,162 --> 00:09:57,662
upstate New York.
249
00:09:57,663 --> 00:09:59,664
Now, nobody knows it's there.
250
00:09:59,665 --> 00:10:01,666
I'm gonna give you my directions
how to get there.
251
00:10:01,667 --> 00:10:03,168
And you read 'em very carefully.
252
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:04,669
And I'll be there
tomorrow night.
253
00:10:04,670 --> 00:10:05,670
Oh, Dutch!
254
00:10:05,671 --> 00:10:08,673
A farm, our own little farm!
255
00:10:08,674 --> 00:10:10,175
Oh, I'm so happy.
256
00:10:10,176 --> 00:10:11,676
Oh...
257
00:10:11,677 --> 00:10:12,677
Honey?
258
00:10:12,678 --> 00:10:15,180
Yes, darling.
Let go.
259
00:10:15,181 --> 00:10:18,183
Here. Here's
the directions.
260
00:10:18,184 --> 00:10:19,684
Here.
261
00:10:19,685 --> 00:10:21,186
Now, you come as soon
as you can.
262
00:10:21,187 --> 00:10:24,689
Okay. Goodbye, my darling,
and be careful.
263
00:10:24,690 --> 00:10:29,194
Ah, don't hug me.
Just kiss me.
264
00:10:29,195 --> 00:10:30,195
I'd better go.
265
00:10:30,196 --> 00:10:32,197
And remember, mum's the word.
266
00:10:32,198 --> 00:10:33,698
Okay. Shh.
267
00:10:33,699 --> 00:10:36,201
Mum's the word.
268
00:10:39,205 --> 00:10:40,706
Mrs. Mendelbaum!
269
00:11:03,729 --> 00:11:05,730
Where is it?
270
00:11:05,731 --> 00:11:07,733
I smelled it
coming up the driveway!
271
00:11:08,734 --> 00:11:11,736
Oh! I love popcorn.
272
00:11:11,737 --> 00:11:13,238
You know, when I go
to the movies,
273
00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:14,739
it's just to eat the popcorn.
274
00:11:14,740 --> 00:11:15,740
I don't care what's playing.
275
00:11:15,741 --> 00:11:17,242
Me too.
276
00:11:17,243 --> 00:11:20,745
You know, one day
when you were 2 years old,
277
00:11:20,746 --> 00:11:22,247
I gave you some popcorn,
278
00:11:22,248 --> 00:11:24,750
and you shoved it
up your little nose.
279
00:11:29,255 --> 00:11:33,759
It wasn't a sad story.
What's the matter?
280
00:11:35,261 --> 00:11:36,262
I'm pregnant.
281
00:11:38,764 --> 00:11:42,267
Oh, Corinne.
Oh, That's wonderful!
282
00:11:42,268 --> 00:11:44,769
I mean,
that is really wonderful.
283
00:11:44,770 --> 00:11:45,771
No?
284
00:11:47,273 --> 00:11:49,774
It's a terrible time
to have a baby.
285
00:11:49,775 --> 00:11:53,278
Tim can't find a job,
and we're living here.
286
00:11:53,279 --> 00:11:54,779
He's so depressed.
287
00:11:54,780 --> 00:11:57,282
How can I have a baby
when everything's wrong?
288
00:11:57,283 --> 00:12:00,286
You mean you want to wait
until everything's right?
289
00:12:01,787 --> 00:12:03,288
You might never have a baby.
290
00:12:06,792 --> 00:12:08,293
But you see...
291
00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:09,794
when I thought of me pregnant,
292
00:12:09,795 --> 00:12:12,797
I kind of pictured it
differently, you know.
293
00:12:12,798 --> 00:12:14,799
Like, I pictured
294
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:18,303
a little Cape Cod house
with a vegetable garden,
295
00:12:18,304 --> 00:12:20,805
and Tim going off to work,
296
00:12:20,806 --> 00:12:22,807
and me fixing food
297
00:12:22,808 --> 00:12:25,310
in my little country kitchen.
298
00:12:25,311 --> 00:12:27,812
The only thing I got
right was the food.
299
00:12:27,813 --> 00:12:30,315
It's just not how I pictured it.
300
00:12:30,316 --> 00:12:32,318
Nothing ever is.
301
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:36,561
Do you think it would be wrong
if I didn't have the baby?
302
00:12:37,823 --> 00:12:40,325
It isn't a question of wrong.
303
00:12:40,326 --> 00:12:42,827
But I do think
that if you don't want a baby,
304
00:12:42,828 --> 00:12:44,329
then you shouldn't have a baby.
305
00:12:46,332 --> 00:12:47,332
You know what?
306
00:12:47,333 --> 00:12:49,835
I think you want the baby.
307
00:12:52,338 --> 00:12:53,339
I do.
308
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:56,841
It's just...
I'm afraid to have a baby
309
00:12:56,842 --> 00:12:57,842
when we have nothing.
310
00:12:57,843 --> 00:13:01,846
Oh... you have
more than nothing.
311
00:13:01,847 --> 00:13:03,348
I mean,
you may not have the kitchen
312
00:13:03,349 --> 00:13:05,351
and the garden and the house,
but you have Tim.
313
00:13:06,352 --> 00:13:09,854
He loves you very much.
314
00:13:09,855 --> 00:13:12,857
That's much better than
a Cape Cod kitchen, Corinne.
315
00:13:12,858 --> 00:13:14,359
It's a Cape Cod house, Ma.
316
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:16,861
Much better
than a Cape Cod house, Corinne.
317
00:13:16,862 --> 00:13:18,363
I know.
318
00:13:20,366 --> 00:13:23,869
Why do you want
to live on Cape Cod?
319
00:13:26,372 --> 00:13:28,373
I mean, it's very damp, Corinne.
320
00:13:28,374 --> 00:13:30,876
You're never gonna
have a nice hairdo.
321
00:13:31,877 --> 00:13:33,378
I don't wanna live on Cape Cod.
322
00:13:33,379 --> 00:13:36,382
Then why do you want
a house there?
323
00:13:38,884 --> 00:13:39,885
It's a type of house, Ma.
324
00:13:42,388 --> 00:13:43,889
Oh.
325
00:13:45,891 --> 00:13:47,392
You're scared, aren't you?
326
00:13:48,394 --> 00:13:53,898
You know, every time
I was pregnant, I was scared.
327
00:13:53,899 --> 00:13:54,899
I was always afraid
328
00:13:54,900 --> 00:13:56,401
I wouldn't know
how to be a mother...
329
00:13:56,402 --> 00:13:58,403
although I already was a mother.
330
00:13:58,404 --> 00:13:59,904
But I was always scared
331
00:13:59,905 --> 00:14:01,906
that I wouldn't know
how to do it.
332
00:14:01,907 --> 00:14:02,908
And I did it.
333
00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:05,910
Do you think
I'd be a good mother?
334
00:14:05,911 --> 00:14:08,913
Oh, you'll be
a wonderful mother...
335
00:14:08,914 --> 00:14:09,915
Like me.
336
00:14:13,919 --> 00:14:15,420
It's kind of exciting, you know?
337
00:14:15,421 --> 00:14:16,921
I know.
338
00:14:16,922 --> 00:14:18,423
I'm gonna have a baby.
339
00:14:18,424 --> 00:14:21,426
You told me.
340
00:14:21,427 --> 00:14:22,927
A baby!
341
00:14:22,928 --> 00:14:25,930
A baby!
342
00:14:25,931 --> 00:14:28,934
My baby is going to have a baby.
343
00:14:34,940 --> 00:14:36,441
Now, I don't want you to think
344
00:14:36,442 --> 00:14:37,942
that I started that train strike
345
00:14:37,943 --> 00:14:39,444
just to drive you home.
346
00:14:39,445 --> 00:14:41,446
Thanks for the ride.
347
00:14:41,447 --> 00:14:42,947
You have incredible eyes.
348
00:14:42,948 --> 00:14:45,950
No, they cross.
349
00:14:45,951 --> 00:14:47,952
Listen, I've got a headache.
350
00:14:47,953 --> 00:14:49,393
Could I trouble you
for some aspirin?
351
00:14:49,955 --> 00:14:51,456
I don't think we have any.
352
00:14:51,457 --> 00:14:52,957
Could you look?
353
00:14:52,958 --> 00:14:56,962
Oh, yes. Wait right here.
354
00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:24,989
Hello...
355
00:15:24,990 --> 00:15:26,991
Oh...
Hi.
356
00:15:26,992 --> 00:15:28,493
Jeez, I'm sorry.
357
00:15:28,494 --> 00:15:30,495
We thought we were alone.
Obviously.
358
00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:31,996
Hi.
359
00:15:31,997 --> 00:15:32,997
Hey, Ma.
360
00:15:32,998 --> 00:15:34,499
Sit down.
361
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,501
Professor Martins
was just having some aspirin,
362
00:15:36,502 --> 00:15:38,002
and then he's leaving, so sit.
363
00:15:38,003 --> 00:15:40,004
Oh, no, no, it's okay.
We really have to go.
364
00:15:40,005 --> 00:15:42,006
Oh, don't
be silly. Stay.
365
00:15:42,007 --> 00:15:43,007
There's no reason to leave.
366
00:15:43,008 --> 00:15:44,509
Oh, no, that's okay.
367
00:15:44,510 --> 00:15:46,010
We have tickets
to go see Chorus Line.
368
00:15:46,011 --> 00:15:48,012
Oh, forget it.
It's a terrible play.
369
00:15:48,013 --> 00:15:50,515
It got awful reviews.
370
00:15:50,516 --> 00:15:52,517
Don't waste your
time. Stay here.
371
00:15:52,518 --> 00:15:55,019
But Ma, Chorus Line
has been a hit
372
00:15:55,020 --> 00:15:56,521
for a couple of years.
373
00:15:56,522 --> 00:15:57,522
Oh, Chorus Line.
374
00:15:57,523 --> 00:15:58,523
Yeah.
375
00:15:58,524 --> 00:16:01,526
I thought you said Conga Line.
376
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:03,027
Because Conga Line
was a terrible play.
377
00:16:03,028 --> 00:16:06,030
No, it's Chorus Line
we're seeing.
378
00:16:06,031 --> 00:16:07,031
Good night, Ma.
379
00:16:07,032 --> 00:16:08,533
Good night, Mare.
Good night.
380
00:16:08,534 --> 00:16:10,034
Good night, professor.
381
00:16:10,035 --> 00:16:11,035
Good night. Good night.
382
00:16:15,541 --> 00:16:18,043
Well, did the devil
and Miss Jones leave?
383
00:16:19,545 --> 00:16:21,546
Hi, Chuck. Hello, Bob.
How are you?
384
00:16:21,547 --> 00:16:22,547
Uh, right now?
385
00:16:22,548 --> 00:16:24,048
How do you say...
looking for action.
386
00:16:24,049 --> 00:16:25,049
No, we were...
387
00:16:25,050 --> 00:16:26,551
just on our way out, Mary.
388
00:16:26,552 --> 00:16:28,052
Oh, no, don't go.
Stay.
389
00:16:28,053 --> 00:16:30,555
Sit down. Let's chat
for a while.
390
00:16:30,556 --> 00:16:32,056
Oh, not tonight, Mary.
Not tonight.
391
00:16:32,057 --> 00:16:34,559
Because tonight
I got me a date with a doll.
392
00:16:39,565 --> 00:16:40,565
How was the aspirin?
393
00:16:40,566 --> 00:16:42,567
Oh, fine. Fine.
394
00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:44,569
Good.
395
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:46,571
Well, good night.
396
00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:49,073
Oh, so soon?
397
00:16:49,074 --> 00:16:51,076
Good night.
398
00:16:52,578 --> 00:16:54,078
How'd you get that?
399
00:16:54,079 --> 00:16:55,079
What, my neck or...
400
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:59,083
No, that... that scar.
401
00:16:59,084 --> 00:17:01,085
Oh, oh, that. Well, uh...
402
00:17:01,086 --> 00:17:02,587
when my sister and I were young,
403
00:17:02,588 --> 00:17:04,088
we saw this Errol Flynn movie,
404
00:17:04,089 --> 00:17:07,091
and we were practicing a duel
with coat hangers, and she won.
405
00:17:07,092 --> 00:17:09,594
Oh, how horrible. Horrible.
406
00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:12,096
Well, it happened
over 36 years ago.
407
00:17:12,097 --> 00:17:13,178
I'm over the initial shock.
408
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:15,600
Anatole!
409
00:17:15,601 --> 00:17:17,101
What in the world are you doing?
410
00:17:17,102 --> 00:17:18,603
Well, I'm just attracted to you,
411
00:17:18,604 --> 00:17:20,104
and I can't help
showing my feelings.
412
00:17:20,105 --> 00:17:21,105
Well, I can't help showing
413
00:17:21,106 --> 00:17:22,106
my feelings either.
414
00:17:22,107 --> 00:17:23,608
Get out.
Mary...
415
00:17:23,609 --> 00:17:24,609
Anatole, please.
416
00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:26,110
What are you doing?
No, wait.
417
00:17:40,626 --> 00:17:43,628
Well, I'm not just gonna
stand here.
418
00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:45,630
I'll go tell him...
419
00:17:45,631 --> 00:17:47,132
I'll tell him what?
420
00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:51,636
Look, Burt, do something.
421
00:17:51,637 --> 00:17:53,639
Do... what can I do? Do what?
422
00:17:56,141 --> 00:18:00,144
Oh, God! Get me away from here.
423
00:18:00,145 --> 00:18:02,647
Oh, boy!
424
00:18:03,649 --> 00:18:04,649
Well, you are lucky
425
00:18:04,650 --> 00:18:06,150
my husband wasn't here
to see this,
426
00:18:06,151 --> 00:18:08,153
because you would
not be alive to groan.
427
00:18:09,655 --> 00:18:10,655
Get out!
428
00:18:32,678 --> 00:18:34,179
Burt...
429
00:18:38,183 --> 00:18:39,684
Come in.
430
00:18:39,685 --> 00:18:41,686
I didn't know who else to call.
431
00:18:41,687 --> 00:18:43,688
Well, what happened?
432
00:18:43,689 --> 00:18:45,691
You said "any time."
433
00:18:47,192 --> 00:18:48,192
That's right.
434
00:18:48,193 --> 00:18:51,696
Any time, anywhere, any place...
435
00:18:51,697 --> 00:18:54,198
Well, I know it's late,
but here I am anyhow.
436
00:18:54,199 --> 00:18:56,701
Burt, What happened?
437
00:18:56,702 --> 00:18:59,203
Nothing much.
438
00:18:59,204 --> 00:19:01,206
I went home and found Mary
and her professor...
439
00:19:03,208 --> 00:19:04,208
Mary and her pro...
440
00:19:05,210 --> 00:19:08,713
I found Mary
and her professor...
441
00:19:11,216 --> 00:19:12,216
Oh, no.
442
00:19:12,217 --> 00:19:15,219
Yeah. I didn't know
what to do.
443
00:19:15,220 --> 00:19:16,721
I didn't know
whether to burst in or what.
444
00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:18,723
I felt like bursting in.
445
00:19:18,724 --> 00:19:19,724
I was so angry,
446
00:19:19,725 --> 00:19:21,726
but I didn't know what to do
once I burst in.
447
00:19:21,727 --> 00:19:25,730
I mean, I wasn't gonna kill him,
so why burst in?
448
00:19:25,731 --> 00:19:27,231
What was I gonna do?
449
00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:28,733
Burst in,
put out some Taco chips,
450
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:29,735
and talk about it?
451
00:19:33,238 --> 00:19:35,239
So I just went into a bar,
452
00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:37,742
and I had a drink...
or 17.
453
00:19:39,244 --> 00:19:40,745
It's okay, though,
454
00:19:40,746 --> 00:19:43,248
because I hold my liquor
very well.
455
00:19:46,752 --> 00:19:48,252
Hey!
456
00:19:48,253 --> 00:19:52,256
Hey, maybe it was the professor
and some other woman.
457
00:19:52,257 --> 00:19:53,758
Maybe Mary loaned them
the couch.
458
00:19:56,762 --> 00:19:57,763
There.
459
00:20:09,274 --> 00:20:11,776
That wasn't
very strong, though, Sal.
460
00:20:11,777 --> 00:20:13,778
That was ginger ale, Burt.
461
00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:15,280
I think you've had enough.
462
00:20:16,281 --> 00:20:18,783
Hey, you know what?
463
00:20:20,285 --> 00:20:22,286
It was probably the upholsterer.
464
00:20:22,287 --> 00:20:25,289
Mary wanted new slipcovers
for the couch,
465
00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:27,792
and he was getting a look at it.
466
00:20:27,793 --> 00:20:30,795
An upholsterer who looked
like the professor,
467
00:20:30,796 --> 00:20:34,298
getting a good look
at the couch...
468
00:20:34,299 --> 00:20:36,801
on top of Mary.
469
00:20:36,802 --> 00:20:38,804
I'm gonna kill him!
I'm gonna break...
470
00:20:42,808 --> 00:20:44,809
Crazy place for a table.
471
00:20:44,810 --> 00:20:48,313
Who put the table in here?
472
00:21:08,834 --> 00:21:12,336
Burt, you're not going home.
473
00:21:12,337 --> 00:21:14,338
You're too drunk,
and you're too upset.
474
00:21:14,339 --> 00:21:15,840
What's he do?
475
00:21:15,841 --> 00:21:18,342
What's he do,
recite poetry to her?
476
00:21:18,343 --> 00:21:20,344
Is that the big attraction?
477
00:21:20,345 --> 00:21:22,346
Is that what does it,
a little poetry?
478
00:21:22,347 --> 00:21:25,850
A guy comes along,
tells you your eyes are pools...
479
00:21:25,851 --> 00:21:27,852
off comes the pantyhose?
480
00:21:27,853 --> 00:21:29,854
Is that what I have
to go through life
481
00:21:29,855 --> 00:21:31,355
worried about?
482
00:21:31,356 --> 00:21:34,358
Guys who rhyme their way
into my marriage?
483
00:21:34,359 --> 00:21:36,861
I can't believe
she did that to you.
484
00:21:36,862 --> 00:21:37,862
I mean, I just can't believe it.
485
00:21:37,863 --> 00:21:40,364
Well, if you can't believe it,
486
00:21:40,365 --> 00:21:42,867
can you imagine the trouble
I'm having here?
487
00:21:44,369 --> 00:21:47,371
How could she ever do that
to you?
488
00:21:47,372 --> 00:21:48,372
If I was married to you,
489
00:21:48,373 --> 00:21:51,375
I'd never even look
at another man.
490
00:21:51,376 --> 00:21:52,376
You wouldn't?
491
00:21:52,377 --> 00:21:54,879
Oh, are you kidding?
492
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:58,883
Doesn't she know
how lucky she is?
493
00:21:58,884 --> 00:21:59,884
She should thank God
she has you.
494
00:21:59,885 --> 00:22:02,888
Instead, she's off...
God! That makes me sick.
495
00:22:05,390 --> 00:22:06,891
How could she do that to you?
496
00:22:06,892 --> 00:22:08,392
And in your own house, no less.
497
00:22:08,393 --> 00:22:09,894
And on our couch.
498
00:22:09,895 --> 00:22:11,395
On your couch.
499
00:22:11,396 --> 00:22:13,397
I picked that couch out.
500
00:22:13,398 --> 00:22:14,398
You didn't.
501
00:22:14,399 --> 00:22:18,402
The color,
I picked out the color.
502
00:22:18,403 --> 00:22:20,905
It's a good color.
It goes with everything.
503
00:22:20,906 --> 00:22:23,408
Oh, it's going with everything
now.
504
00:22:25,410 --> 00:22:27,411
Oh, Mary...
505
00:22:27,412 --> 00:22:30,414
I never thought
she would do that.
506
00:22:30,415 --> 00:22:32,917
I mean, how could she do
what she's doing?
507
00:22:32,918 --> 00:22:34,418
And now what am I gonna do
508
00:22:34,419 --> 00:22:35,920
now that she's done
what she did?
509
00:22:35,921 --> 00:22:38,923
Oh, God.
510
00:22:38,924 --> 00:22:40,925
It's who I married...
511
00:22:40,926 --> 00:22:42,928
I wanna die.
512
00:22:45,931 --> 00:22:47,933
Burt, you can't leave.
513
00:22:49,434 --> 00:22:50,935
I could,
if I could find the door.
514
00:22:52,437 --> 00:22:56,440
You're in absolutely
no condition to go anywhere.
515
00:22:56,441 --> 00:22:57,942
You're sleeping here tonight.
516
00:22:57,943 --> 00:22:59,443
Where?
517
00:22:59,444 --> 00:23:01,445
On the couch.
518
00:23:01,446 --> 00:23:05,449
Oh, well,
as long as it's on the couch.
519
00:23:05,450 --> 00:23:06,451
With me.
520
00:23:20,966 --> 00:23:23,467
Will Eunice be happyliving on a farm with Dutch?
521
00:23:23,468 --> 00:23:25,970
Will Jodie be happy with Carol?
522
00:23:25,971 --> 00:23:27,471
Or will he be unhappywithout Dennis?
523
00:23:27,472 --> 00:23:28,973
How happy will Tim be
524
00:23:28,974 --> 00:23:31,475
when he finds outCorinne is pregnant?
525
00:23:31,476 --> 00:23:32,977
Will Burt make Sally happy?
526
00:23:32,978 --> 00:23:35,980
And if he does,how happy will that make Burt?
527
00:23:35,981 --> 00:23:37,481
Will Mary be happy
528
00:23:37,482 --> 00:23:39,483
studying Englishin the professor's class...
529
00:23:39,484 --> 00:23:41,485
or shouldshe take karate instead?
530
00:23:41,486 --> 00:23:43,487
For the sakeof everyone's happiness,
531
00:23:43,488 --> 00:23:45,489
should Jessica put Chester away?
532
00:23:45,490 --> 00:23:46,991
Or should she let himgo through life
533
00:23:46,992 --> 00:23:48,993
as a happy-go-lucky idiot?
534
00:23:48,994 --> 00:23:50,494
These questions and many others
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00:23:50,495 --> 00:23:52,495
will be answered on next week'sepisode of... Soap.
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00:23:59,504 --> 00:24:02,006
Soap was videotapedbefore a studio audience.
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