All language subtitles for The Goldbergs s04e10 Han Ukkah Solo.eng

Adult Adam: When you were a kid,
cracking open a toy catalog

and making your holiday wish list was
the most exciting part of the year.

But now that I was a ninth-grade man,

I wanted something
you couldn't find in any store.

Psst! Yo!

Goldnerd. Come here.

- You got the money, I got the hook-up.
- Let me see it first.

Christmas came early.

He had a bootleg copy of

the "Star Wars Holiday Special."

Holy Kenobi! The legend is true!

This is the rarest film in existence.

Only aired once in the lame-ass '70s.

- Gimme, gimme, gimme!
- Pleasure doing business.

Enjoy your space wars.

Stop what you're doing.

I have the biggest holiday news
of all time.

If I were to stop what I'm doing, it'd
be more than what I'm actually doing.

Okay. So, as everyone knows,

"Star Wars" is my entire life,
soul, and universe.

[Snores]

[Claps] No dozing!

- Well, then be less boring.
- Boring?!

This is two hours' worth
of unseen "Star Wars" goodness.

"Star Wars."
Is that the one with the bear?

I mean, I-I even heard rumor
we meet Chewie's family.

Chuy? The guy who works
in my stock room?

No, Chewbacca.

Is he the little guy who yells,
"The plane, the plane"?

No, the wookiee? Han Solo's fuzz ball?

[Imitates Chewbacca]

[Snoring]

No dozing!

Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com

It was December 14th, 1980-something,
and that meant one thing...

the school holiday concert.

All:
Joy to the world

Yep. We did all
the fun Christmas classics.

We also did one half-assed tune

to give a shout-out
to the other holiday.

[Piano continues]

[Snaps]

You... need something?

Yeah, it's the second verse.

- That's you.
- That's a pass.

But it's the Hanukkah solo.
You do it every year.

I think the other, way better Goldberg
should do the solo.

Check it.

[Rapping]
Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel

I can't make it cool. It's impossible.

Thank you for that journey.

Erica, if you didn't want the solo,
then why did you sign up for it?

- I didn't. [Chuckles]
- Oh, yes, you did.

With a glitter pen.

That's not my handwriting.

'Cause I would never dot the
"I" in "Erica" with a heart.

Oh, she is so dead!

- You...
- Love me?

Oh, my little shmoopaloo.

Don't you shmoopaloo me.

What gives you the right
to forge my name on a sign up sheet?

It was on the bulletin board.

All the solos were taken
except for "Dreidel Cubed".

- That's what the hipcats call hit.
- No one calls it that!

The song isn't hip and I'm
tired of singing it every year.

Fine. Then you go in and tell your
grandfather and break his sweet heart.

He lives for that Hanukkah solo.

If you don't sing it,
you'll literally kill that poor old man.

I knew you'd say that.

Way to kill your grandfather
and Hanukkah, Erica.

But this is just your classic mom guilt.

It won't work.

- Pops, we need to talk.
- Of course, darling.

How can I make your life better?

Damn you, he's so adorable.

- So, you'll sing it.
- Nope.

And if you have a problem with that,

then you can just ask Barry to do it.

Barry? Please.

Just heard my name.

What am I not supposed to be hearing?

Surprise party? Award show?

Surprise award show party?

Honey, if I told you,
it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?

Damn it. That logic checks out.

Well, I'm gonna go find
my tuxedo T-shirt for no reason

and be back around 6:00, wink, wink.

Looks like my solo's
the least of your problems

now that you have to throw a surprise
award show party in 45 minutes.

As Erica ditched her solo,

I uncovered the mystery to the
"Star Wars Holiday Special."

It wasn't great.

Wow.

That was so... cool.

Were we watching two different things?

You don't know "Star Wars."

This special is really for the true fan.

So, the true fan

wants to watch Dorothy
from "The Golden Girls"

flirt with an alien?

Uh, okay, I admit it was an odd choice

to have Bea Arthur manage the cantina.

Let's just move on.

And what's the deal
with Lumpy and Itchy?

Chewie's family
had to be named something.

Lumpy and Itchy?

Couldn't they have spent
15 more seconds on the names?

I don't know!

And I don't know why
Art Carney is a family friend

or why Jefferson Starship
is performing for the Empire.

Starship's in their name.

That one actually makes sense to me.

Let's never speak of this again.

So, you didn't love it. Who cares?

I care!

I love "Star Wars." It's my life.

It makes no sense
why I didn't love this, too.

It happens to every kid.

The older you get, the more you realize

that all the things you loved
as a boy are pointless.

Are you saying I'm, like...

losing my sense of childlike wonder?

Well, you're not
a child anymore, so, yes.

And frankly, it's about time.
It happened to me when I was 6.

- 6?
- My dad lost a bet.

We slept in a car. It was a whole thing.

Hey, good talk.

As I lost faith in Chewie and Han Solo,

my mom was trying to land Erica's solo.

Hey, hey, Suzie Cinoman.

How's the number-one music
and interpretive-dance teacher

in Montgomery County?

What's gonna happen to me right now?

Well, all that's happening right now

is that this blondie
brought you some blondies.

I even sprinkled some cinnamon on top.

It's us in dessert form.

That's very nice.

I'm just, um, gonna go ahead
and open this door

- to make sure that people know I'm okay.
- Oh, come on.

Everything's just peachy.

Here. Have a bite of us.

Go on. Put it in your face.

- Yum, yum.
- Mm.

Mmm!

I guess we are friends now.

Best friends.

And while you're chewing
on that, chew on this...

You're gonna give Erica a solo
or it's your ass.

I knew it!

These blondies aren't just
sprinkled with cinnamon,

- they're sprinkled with deceit.
- Oh, give it up.

Erica has to sing about Hanukkah.

It's what her grandpa looks
forward to all year.

I tried. She's just not
down with the dreidel.

End of story.

Well, there must be one other
fun Hanukkah song.

- Think.
- There's this one.

[Singing "Ma'oz Tzur" in Hebrew]

Okay, you just spit all over me.

There is that one about
being frugal with oil.

I hate you right now.

Oh! I know! There's that
lively little one

about trying to escape the Greeks.

No! It's all no!

[Sighs]

I guess I'll just have to coax Erica

into writing her own Hanukkah song,

and she'll knock everyone's socks off.

I like your moxie,
but I'm pretty sure that

Hanukkah has been around for a while,
and no one has cracked that nut yet.

I bit that top one.

And so, my mom went to give Erica
something to chew on.

Hey, boopie. Whatcha doing?

Just noodling on a new song.

Oh, yeah? What's it about?

A boy who can't see
what's right in front of him.

Well, I know a pretty cool boy

- you could write a song about.
- Who?

- Judah Maccabee.
- Does he go to Lincoln?

- No, he's been dead for 2,000 years.
- Ew!

And he's the hunky warrior
who saved Hanukkah!

He booted the Greeks
out of the temple in Jerusalem.

He's the reason for the season.

This is starting to sound like school.

Come on. This is for Pops.

You're so talented at writing songs.

Share your gift with the world!

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

If anyone in this family
is gifted at music-ing,

it's Big Tasty.

Okay, if he's doing this, then clearly
it's a dead-end road. I'm out.

Kids, there's no need to fight over

who's gonna write
the perfect Hanukkah song.

Although Barry
does seem to want it more.

Yes! Barry wins! In your face!

You're just trying
to pit us against each other

so I write you a song out of spite.

It won't work.

[Mockingly] You're just trying to pit us

against each other
so meow, meow, meow, meow.

Idiot, you're playing into her plan.

Meow, meow, meow,
meow, meow, meow, meow.

[Normal voice] You're a cat, basically.

"Meow, meow, meow, meow.

I'm Garfield. I love lasagna!"

Ugh! You're so stupid! Fine!

I will write a better song than you

- with my eyes closed.
- Oh, yeah?

Well, this will be the song
that puts me on the map.

I'm guaranteed
to make millions off of it.

Millions? By writing a Hanukkah song?

Think about it. What's the
greatest cash cow of our time?

Give up?

- It's "Happy Birthday."
- Wait.

- Dude, no one owns that song.
- Wrong.

Two little old ladies
wrote it 100 years ago.

Now every time
it's sung on TV or movies,

they get $50,000.

- Boom!
- That's another $50,000.

Well, now I'm gonna be
the birthday guy for Hanukkah.

Ka-ching!

In your stupid face.

In yours!

I'm gonna write the best damn
Hanukkah song this world's ever seen,

because you suck
and you make me very mad.

Yay! The Hanukkah spirit is alive!

Hey, kiddo. What's shaking?

What's shaking is "Ghostbusters 2."

It's riddled with logic problems.

Since when can you use

magic slime and a Nintendo controller

to make the Statue of Liberty walk?

Since the ghost fellas can do anything.

Why are you being so hard on them?

After I watched
that "Star Wars" special,

I've been re-evaluating

- all the things I loved as a child.
- Don't do that.

All the movies I worship
have come into question.

- Don't do that.
- "Short Circuit 2," "Time Bandits,"

and don't even get me started
on "Jaws 4: The Revenge."

Stop right there.

I know you love that movie.

Until now!

Why would a shark swim
from New England to The Bahamas

to eat a lady who's husband
killed his shark friend?

Sharks have feelings, too.

"This time, it's personal."

How's that possible?

It's a fish!

Fish don't hold grudges.

Oh, so now you're a shark expert.

All these years,

I was a child who blindly loved

anything put in front of him,
but now I'm a man.

And it's all got to go.

And so I'd throw away
my childhood forever,

which would be harder than I thought.

Oh!

Yep. This was gonna take a while.

Damn it!

I'm going downstairs

and finding a trash can for men.

As the holiday concert got closer,

my mom had a perfect plan
to land Erica a solo.

So, I know I told you

we'd be working on a new Hanukkah song,

but we actually don't have one.

We have two.

- Erica, delight our ears.
- Okay.

Well, I don't want
to build it up too much,

but prepare yourselves

for the greatest Hanukkah song
ever written.

Okay.

Yeah, that's the birthday song.

Not fair, cheater.

I can't use that song.

I will have to pay those old ladies

hundreds of thousands of dollars,

and I've already spent our entire budget

on construction paper
for the snowflakes.

How could you let this happen, Erica?

All you had to do
was write a timeless classic

that would last for ages.

I got you covered, Mom.

JTP, drop the beat.

[Both beatboxing]

[Rapping]
How did Hanukkah
start, you all wonder

- Wow.
- Okay. What?

Education, y'all!

While I really do appreciate the effort

even though, uh,
one song was plagiarized

and the other one
was factually insane...

You are insane.

I added dinosaurs
to a holiday about lamps.

It's called spicing it up.

Look, the "Dreidel" song
was our only option

and, truthfully, none of this
was worth the hassle.

You can't do this to me!

To Pops. This is about him.

Not my problem.

The "Dreidel" song is cut.

But I have more sick rhymes

about a dreideldactyl and menorahsaurus.

They're dino-Hanukkah hybrids

who break-dance and fight crime.

Oh, ho!

[Rapping]
Yo, yo, yo,
I'm a dreideldactyl

And I'm also late, aren't I?

Hey.

I got something big to show Adam.

- Where is he?
- Upstairs.

He said he was gonna
tear down his movie posters

now that his whole world
has gone to crap.

Blah, blah, blah.

- I was making a sandwich.
- What?

- Why didn't you stop him?
- Stop him?

I told him this was about time.

This happens to everybody.
It just took him a few years longer.

Having unreasonable, childlike wonder

is what makes Adam Adam.

It's what I love about the boy.

I guess from now on, Adam isn't Adam.

- We'll call him Gary.
- Who the hell's Gary?

Gary's the kid in Adam's class

who's really good at baseball
and rides the moped.

Ah, Gary.

So normal. So good at shortstop.

I'm gonna show Adam

that there's still plenty
of wonder left in this world,

and you'll have to get off
your tuchas to stop me.

Eh. Well played, old man.

Well played.

Kiddo, you're coming with me.

I got something fantastic
you're guaranteed to love.

- I'm good.
- Well, imagine if they made a movie

with your favorite moving-picture maker,

George Lucas.

- The Great Bearded One?
- And what if Mr. Lucas then cast

that foxy Lea Thompson
from "Back in the Future"?

I'm slightly listening.

And what if I told you this very movie
was from the writer of "Indiana Jones"?

I'm an adult now.

I know it's simply not possible.

And yet it is,

and it's playing at the Hiway Theater.

If this movie can't restore
your faith in dreaming,

then nothing will.

As always, Pops was a man of his word.

Hi. Uh, three tickets

for the movie about the talking duck.

Except he took me to
the biggest flop of the '80s.

You know, I only see one movie a year.
This better be good.

It's George Lucas!

I bet everyone in school's gonna see it.

Well, except the other
Adam Goldberg in 11th grade.

He only goes to that cinema
downtown that serves wine.

It's been brought to my attention
that the "Dreidel Cubed" song

has been cut from the holiday concert.

Honestly, it's for the best.

It's not. We got to do the "Dreidel."

- She's gotten to you, hasn't she?
- She who?

She is standing right outside that door,

- isn't she?
- Yes.

So, here's the thing, Cinnabuns,

this Quaker school
was founded on the basis

that everyone deserves
a festive holiday song.

You can't have a holiday concert
without any Cha-nukkah songs.

- Just pick another one.
- Sure, Earl.

Uh, how about one of the famous ones
recorded by, oh, I don't know,

- Barry Manilow or Neil Diamond?
- Perfect.

They only did Christmas songs.
Even they knew what the audience wanted.

Well, look, if you don't do
any Cha-nukkah songs,

then you can't do
any Christmas songs, either.

Okay, this is going off the rails.

If we can't mention the holidays,

what are the kids
supposed to sing about?

Oh, I don't know.

The weather? Mittens?

The damn plow guy
that always skips your street?

I'm paying you!

You think of something, damn it!

Well, you've robbed the children of
the holidays. I hope you're happy.

In my defense,

I was only trying to undermine you.

As my mom killed the holiday concert,

I was bringing my
childlike wonder back to life

with a brand-new legendary movie.

Or so I thought.

Like they say, doll, love's strange.

- We could always give it a try.
- Lea Thompson: Okay.

Let's go for it, Mr. Macho.

What am I watching?!

Come on. The duck is like E.T.

He just wants to go home.

Then how come he's spending
so much time managing that band?

Al, the duck's gonna
make it with that lady.

- What have you brought us to?
- A family film.

It's a family film.

I can't watch this anymore.

- Well, then let's go.
- Really?

We can do that?

It's about time you learned
that an adult can walk out of anything

and demand his damn money back.

I do it once a year.

- Let's go.
- Adam, no!

It's not that bad.

A lady and a duck in bed?

Who the [bleep] thought
this was a good idea?

It was the final rehearsal

for the big non-holiday holiday concert.

[To tune of "Silent Night"]

- [To tune of "O Christmas Tree"]
-
O winter time, O winter time

- [To tune of "Here Comes Santa Claus"]
-
Here comes Uncle Doug

Okay, what the hell's going on?

Why are we singing
terrible songs about the weather

and someone's weird Uncle Doug?

Doug is my uncle and he lives in Ohio
and he helps me pay my rent.

And without naming names,
we are singing about the weather

because of Beverly Goldberg.

Oops. I let it slip.

Wait. This is your hot mom's fault?

[All booing]

Um, Miss Cinoman,

can you not just sit there
and let them boo at us?

Yeah, I'm only used to
wild cheering and hearing,

"Aw, yeah, Barry! You the man!"

[All booing]

Mom!

Hey-ey.

You stole Christmas,

and now the whole school blames us.

It was the worst day ever.
People booed me.

Me!

Thank God I'm getting a surprise award
show, otherwise I'd be devastated.

Honey, there's not gonna be a...

Don't. Just don't.

Look, Erica, I'm sorry.

I did not mean to ruin the concert.

Well, you did.

I'm sorry, Pops,

but I'm not singing your song this year.

What are you talking about?

Don't do this, Erica.

Do not upset this lovely old man.

Ba-bap. I'm talking about
the "Dreidel" song, Pops.

It's not happening.

Okay, I'm dealing
with an Adam crisis here,

so is this necessary?

The sweet man's busy. Leave him be.

Ba-da-bup!

Mom made me sing that song for you

ever since I was in the third grade.

Oh, I see what's going on.

Your mother's lied to you for a decade.

Have fun with that.

You're unbelievable.

Okay, okay.

Here's the thing.

I might have slightly used Pops

to guilt you into singing for me.

Well, did it ever occur to you
to just ask me like a normal person?

Please! I gave up on that years ago.

Look, when you were a little girl,

every day, you used to dress up

and put on shows for me.

It was everything.

I remember that.

Well, those days are gone.

Now it's a "no"
anytime I ask anything of you.

So, I tricked you.

I just love hearing my little girl sing.

I actually understand your point.

Good.

'Cause I'm done trying to trick you.

If you don't want to sing,
you don't have to.

I know I don't have to,

but now that you finally asked,

I kind of want to.

That night, my sister gave my mom

the Hanukkah gift she'd always wanted...

the joy of hearing her little girl sing.

-
Will be a better place

-
Will be a better place

And, as it turned out,

Pops had a gift for me, too.

Thought you might want this back.

"Holiday Special?"

Did you actually watch it?

Yep, and guess what?

I think you missed something pretty big.

This guy. Know him?

Of course. Boba Fett.

He's my favorite character.

Got to admit,
he was pretty cool in this.

Wait a second.

This was made way before
"Empire Strikes Back,"

so if you think about it,

the "Holiday Special" gave us the Fett.

All I know is
with the right point of view,

this special really is...
pretty damn special.

Pops.

Um...

I don't get it.

How do you manage to always
see the good in everything?

It's easy if you never
lose your childlike wonder.

It doesn't matter how old you are.

People like us always have it.

Really?

Really.

I need you to promise me one thing.

Always hold on to that wonder,
no matter what.

I will, Pops.

I love you.

I know.

And with that, Pops reminded me

that if you truly love something,

you never grow out of it.

That's the thing about the holidays.

Even the biggest Scrooge

might be moved by a sense of wonder.

You... replaced my favorite posters.

I guess it's a holiday miracle.

Once I saw the good
in the "Star Wars" special,

I began to see the good in everything.

And so I went back
to finish "Howard the Duck."

Turns out he became
a legendary cult badass.

Aren't you glad we came back
and saw the end?

Oh, yeah.

I wish I was half as cool as Howard.

He does have a way with the ladies.

[Both laugh]

-
Put a little love in your heart

[Laughs] That's my baby.

[Cheers and applause]

I had to lie to make this happen,
but it was totally worth it.

_

[Rapping]
Who's da mack?
It's Judah Mac

Barry:
He once choked out
a Tyrannosaurus

Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com

Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0