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1
00:00:00,016 --> 00:00:01,913
Adult Adam: Ah, the last
week of school.
2
00:00:01,975 --> 00:00:04,418
It's a truly magical feeling
of impending freedom
3
00:00:04,490 --> 00:00:07,334
as the entire student body
unites in not giving a crap.
4
00:00:08,144 --> 00:00:09,807
Even the teachers were checked out.
5
00:00:09,864 --> 00:00:11,365
All right, stop your stretching.
6
00:00:11,428 --> 00:00:13,142
We're gonna watch
the movie "Bloodsport".
7
00:00:13,201 --> 00:00:14,262
Not that I'm complaining,
8
00:00:14,307 --> 00:00:16,243
but isn't that, like,
wildly inappropriate
9
00:00:16,306 --> 00:00:17,992
and has nothing to do with gym class?
10
00:00:18,059 --> 00:00:19,962
"Sports" are in the title.
Leave me alone.
11
00:00:20,015 --> 00:00:21,716
I got nothing left to give you kids!
12
00:00:21,774 --> 00:00:22,941
You did this to me!
13
00:00:22,999 --> 00:00:24,538
But for all us eighth graders,
14
00:00:24,593 --> 00:00:26,708
the last week of school
meant one thing.
15
00:00:26,773 --> 00:00:30,643
All right, boys and girls, today
begins Freshman Fear Week.
16
00:00:30,752 --> 00:00:31,590
[Students gasp]
17
00:00:31,631 --> 00:00:33,847
This is when upperclassmen
18
00:00:33,915 --> 00:00:36,583
hunt down terrified
incoming ninth graders
19
00:00:36,669 --> 00:00:38,051
and throw them in the showers.
20
00:00:38,110 --> 00:00:39,811
- Did he say "hunt"?
- Balls!
21
00:00:39,871 --> 00:00:41,612
No! I made it through middle school
22
00:00:41,671 --> 00:00:43,208
without using those showers!
23
00:00:43,264 --> 00:00:43,847
Back in the '80s,
24
00:00:43,891 --> 00:00:45,866
school policy on cruel
hazing traditions...
25
00:00:45,913 --> 00:00:47,693
[Chuckling] Oh, yeah. Tended
to be a tad more lax.
26
00:00:47,753 --> 00:00:49,417
I swear, one day, they'll realize
27
00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:51,451
this whole practice
is completely barbaric.
28
00:00:51,523 --> 00:00:53,691
You will never live to see that day!
29
00:00:53,767 --> 00:00:56,090
But... you're my brother.
You're supposed to protect me.
30
00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:57,081
Opposite!
31
00:00:57,124 --> 00:00:59,592
I've been training
for this my whole life.
32
00:00:59,664 --> 00:01:02,499
Every headlock, noogie, and wet willy
33
00:01:02,692 --> 00:01:03,936
has led to this moment.
34
00:01:03,985 --> 00:01:05,719
There has to be a way out of this.
35
00:01:05,778 --> 00:01:08,120
There is, but it's not pretty.
36
00:01:08,190 --> 00:01:10,243
Mama! Barry's gonna hurt me!
37
00:01:10,307 --> 00:01:11,140
I'm here, Schmoo.
38
00:01:11,182 --> 00:01:12,316
He's gonna hunt me down
39
00:01:12,363 --> 00:01:13,790
and throw me into the gross
gym showers!
40
00:01:13,842 --> 00:01:14,711
- No!
- Yes!
41
00:01:14,753 --> 00:01:15,162
- No!
42
00:01:15,212 --> 00:01:16,546
And then he's gonna rip my shoes off
43
00:01:16,597 --> 00:01:18,689
and make me touch the floor
without flip-flops!
44
00:01:18,754 --> 00:01:21,055
You're not athletic
enough to get athlete's foot!
45
00:01:21,124 --> 00:01:22,457
Help me! I'm just a boy!
46
00:01:22,508 --> 00:01:24,207
[Gasps] I got you, baby.
47
00:01:24,265 --> 00:01:25,731
Oh, God! No, I don't.
48
00:01:25,785 --> 00:01:26,533
[Thud]
49
00:01:26,572 --> 00:01:28,024
I'm twisted up inside
50
00:01:28,077 --> 00:01:31,412
But nonetheless,
I feel the need to say
51
00:01:31,501 --> 00:01:33,969
Synced and corrected by Nest0r
www.addic7ed.com
52
00:01:34,214 --> 00:01:35,548
I don't know the future
53
00:01:35,599 --> 00:01:39,037
But the past keeps getting
clearer every day
54
00:01:39,827 --> 00:01:41,761
It was June 2, 1980-something,
55
00:01:41,833 --> 00:01:43,367
the end of the school year...
56
00:01:43,432 --> 00:01:45,766
A moment that would live
in time forever.
57
00:01:45,846 --> 00:01:46,939
Hey, guys.
58
00:01:47,007 --> 00:01:49,459
Still looking for contributions
for the time capsule.
59
00:01:49,532 --> 00:01:51,914
So far, we've got
one Hall & Oates poster,
60
00:01:51,984 --> 00:01:52,874
put in by me.
61
00:01:52,917 --> 00:01:54,517
I'm gonna put in a naked
picture of myself
62
00:01:54,573 --> 00:01:57,892
so I can look back and say,
"Yeah, Naked Rob had it."
63
00:01:57,981 --> 00:01:59,737
I'm gonna put myself in there.
64
00:02:00,044 --> 00:02:01,698
Boom! Livin' in the future.
65
00:02:01,755 --> 00:02:04,123
Dude, it's a time capsule,
not a time machine.
66
00:02:04,668 --> 00:02:05,706
Right?
67
00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:07,055
You're funny
68
00:02:07,105 --> 00:02:10,173
and have trouble making
eye contact with girls.
69
00:02:10,257 --> 00:02:11,590
I like it.
70
00:02:11,733 --> 00:02:14,234
All except for the haircut
and the posture, but I can fix that.
71
00:02:14,307 --> 00:02:16,175
Thanks, I think? Hey, Erica!
72
00:02:16,236 --> 00:02:17,031
Oh!
73
00:02:17,072 --> 00:02:17,992
You want to sign my yearbook?
74
00:02:18,033 --> 00:02:20,134
I saved you precious real
estate right next to my face.
75
00:02:20,756 --> 00:02:21,224
Fine.
76
00:02:21,282 --> 00:02:22,600
Yeah, you know, if you need
some more time with it,
77
00:02:22,651 --> 00:02:23,206
you could just give it back to me.
78
00:02:23,242 --> 00:02:25,326
Okay, you're done. "Have a summer."
79
00:02:25,516 --> 00:02:27,583
Did you mean, like, "good summer" or...
80
00:02:27,658 --> 00:02:30,393
Or "bitchin' summer" or...
Or "sexy summer"?
81
00:02:30,471 --> 00:02:31,469
Just "summer".
82
00:02:31,514 --> 00:02:33,489
83
00:02:33,552 --> 00:02:35,676
Do you think she meant
it like "Have a summer"
84
00:02:35,751 --> 00:02:37,218
or "Have a summer"?
85
00:02:37,281 --> 00:02:38,900
Dude, you got to let this go.
86
00:02:38,957 --> 00:02:41,003
- Yeah, don't be such a Duckie.
- Such a what?
87
00:02:41,067 --> 00:02:43,499
Duckie, the twerpy, lovesick best friend
88
00:02:43,571 --> 00:02:45,338
who never gets Molly Ringwald.
89
00:02:45,397 --> 00:02:46,397
That's you, bro.
90
00:02:46,452 --> 00:02:47,221
Pbht! Please!
91
00:02:47,252 --> 00:02:48,704
If I'm anyone from "Pretty in Pink",
92
00:02:48,757 --> 00:02:50,558
it's feather-haired
bad boy James Spader.
93
00:02:50,628 --> 00:02:52,000
- That is delusional.
- Get to know yourself, bro.
94
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:55,710
Geoffrey, Andrew, Robert,
I need to speak to my child.
95
00:02:55,806 --> 00:02:57,507
She's using our proper first names.
96
00:02:57,574 --> 00:02:59,049
- Move it.
- It's scary 'cause she said "Andrew."
97
00:02:59,103 --> 00:03:00,594
- What?!
- I didn't even do anything!
98
00:03:00,648 --> 00:03:03,783
Adam says you're gonna haze
and humiliate him at school?
99
00:03:03,868 --> 00:03:05,134
Oh, that. Yeah, that's happening.
100
00:03:05,183 --> 00:03:09,066
- Like heck it is!
- You lay one finger on my baby...
101
00:03:09,166 --> 00:03:12,141
You mean the pubescent monster
standing next to you?
102
00:03:12,399 --> 00:03:14,772
Take a look at him, Ma.
He's all grown up now.
103
00:03:14,843 --> 00:03:18,913
That is not... the, uh...
104
00:03:19,016 --> 00:03:20,617
No, that's not...
105
00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:23,843
Is this true?
106
00:03:23,884 --> 00:03:26,172
No! Look at me!
107
00:03:26,409 --> 00:03:27,790
Actually, don't.
108
00:03:27,832 --> 00:03:30,316
Uh, close your eyes and imagine
me from last year.
109
00:03:30,389 --> 00:03:31,372
Oh, my God!
110
00:03:31,416 --> 00:03:34,008
He's right. My baby
is going to high school.
111
00:03:34,083 --> 00:03:36,573
No! Stop reeling
at the passage of time!
112
00:03:36,646 --> 00:03:37,613
Protect me!
113
00:03:37,666 --> 00:03:38,766
Your voice!
114
00:03:38,823 --> 00:03:41,591
I'm just now hearing
it for the first time.
115
00:03:41,679 --> 00:03:45,048
It's like the last gasp
of an old helium balloon.
116
00:03:45,147 --> 00:03:46,614
[Softly] No.
117
00:03:46,677 --> 00:03:47,878
Oh, yes.
118
00:03:47,935 --> 00:03:50,950
I just broke Mom's spirit,
so now I can shower you.
119
00:03:51,033 --> 00:03:52,234
Get ready, bro.
120
00:03:52,409 --> 00:03:54,791
Shhhhhhhhhhh.
121
00:03:54,872 --> 00:03:55,939
Why are you shushing me?
122
00:03:55,985 --> 00:03:58,179
That's not a shush.
That's a shower sound.
123
00:03:58,246 --> 00:04:00,954
What are you talking about?
This is a shower sound.
124
00:04:01,031 --> 00:04:01,851
Kwwwwwwwhhhhh!
125
00:04:01,892 --> 00:04:04,766
That's the ocean, bro. A
shower sounds like this.
126
00:04:04,846 --> 00:04:05,508
Shhhhhh!
127
00:04:05,530 --> 00:04:07,318
You're making a fool out of yourself!
128
00:04:07,378 --> 00:04:08,766
Listen to me. Listen.
129
00:04:08,818 --> 00:04:10,329
- Kwwwwaaahhhhhhh!
- Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
130
00:04:10,393 --> 00:04:12,193
- Kwwwwaaahhhhhhh!
- Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
131
00:04:12,263 --> 00:04:14,564
- Kwwwwaaahhhhhhh!
- Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
132
00:04:14,653 --> 00:04:17,000
- [Sniffing deeply]
- Oh.
133
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,259
- Hi.
- Hello.
134
00:04:18,309 --> 00:04:21,478
Don't mind me. I'm just
having some Bev time.
135
00:04:21,573 --> 00:04:22,568
[Sniffs]
136
00:04:22,836 --> 00:04:24,741
Do you mind closing the door, please?
137
00:04:24,802 --> 00:04:27,738
Mur? Your wife is sitting
in the broom closet,
138
00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:29,068
sniffing a baby blanket.
139
00:04:29,117 --> 00:04:29,881
That's her thing.
140
00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:31,513
She sits in there and sniffs
them to remind her
141
00:04:31,569 --> 00:04:34,162
of when our children were
babies and not the worst.
142
00:04:34,237 --> 00:04:35,538
And that doesn't bother you?
143
00:04:35,588 --> 00:04:36,921
What do I know? I'm just the husband.
144
00:04:37,507 --> 00:04:38,530
[Sighs]
145
00:04:38,575 --> 00:04:39,442
Fine.
146
00:04:39,484 --> 00:04:41,857
[Sniffing deeply]
147
00:04:41,928 --> 00:04:43,192
[Sighs]
148
00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:44,356
That's good blankie.
149
00:04:44,394 --> 00:04:47,730
Bevy, I know it's hard with Adam
going into high school,
150
00:04:47,819 --> 00:04:51,607
but you can't hide here
in the closet forever.
151
00:04:51,704 --> 00:04:52,722
[Sighs]
152
00:04:52,767 --> 00:04:53,900
You're right.
153
00:04:53,947 --> 00:04:55,649
Just... Just take this thing
154
00:04:55,716 --> 00:04:56,988
and put it where I can never find it.
155
00:04:57,038 --> 00:04:58,591
It's time to let go.
156
00:04:58,863 --> 00:05:00,936
- It doesn't appear like you are.
- I'm letting go.
157
00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:02,531
I shouldn't have to struggle like this.
158
00:05:02,586 --> 00:05:03,476
Set me free.
159
00:05:03,518 --> 00:05:04,845
Al! Will you help me?!
160
00:05:04,896 --> 00:05:06,472
She's got superhuman strength!
161
00:05:06,527 --> 00:05:08,713
Take it! I'm handing it over.
162
00:05:08,781 --> 00:05:11,419
She's got the forearms of a tennis pro.
163
00:05:11,494 --> 00:05:12,415
Take the blankie.
164
00:05:12,458 --> 00:05:13,824
Put your back into it.
165
00:05:13,876 --> 00:05:15,410
Cure me of my sickness.
166
00:05:15,467 --> 00:05:17,256
As my mom was losing
her safety blanket,
167
00:05:17,315 --> 00:05:19,453
my friends and I were living in danger.
168
00:05:19,519 --> 00:05:20,526
Are you okay, Taz?
169
00:05:20,571 --> 00:05:23,311
No, man! I'm so wet, I'm so cold.
170
00:05:23,389 --> 00:05:24,623
They didn't even give me a towel.
171
00:05:24,672 --> 00:05:26,116
If they can throw Taz
Money in the showers,
172
00:05:26,151 --> 00:05:27,416
there's no hope for us!
173
00:05:27,466 --> 00:05:29,504
We just have to come up with a plan
before the bell rings.
174
00:05:29,568 --> 00:05:30,802
It's too late!
175
00:05:30,993 --> 00:05:32,484
Shhh! Shhh!
176
00:05:32,538 --> 00:05:33,864
Why is he shushing us?
177
00:05:34,153 --> 00:05:37,369
No matter what happens,
we go down together.
178
00:05:37,456 --> 00:05:38,112
For sure.
179
00:05:38,150 --> 00:05:38,928
- [Bell rings]
- No!
180
00:05:38,968 --> 00:05:39,836
- Take him, not me!
181
00:05:40,283 --> 00:05:41,861
It was every man for himself.
182
00:05:41,916 --> 00:05:43,016
We tried to escape,
183
00:05:43,063 --> 00:05:45,116
but that day, we faced
the greatest shower ambush
184
00:05:45,180 --> 00:05:46,732
the eighth grade had ever seen!
185
00:05:46,787 --> 00:05:48,911
No! Wait! No showers!
186
00:05:48,977 --> 00:05:51,857
My turtlenecks shrink
when they get we-e-t!
187
00:05:51,940 --> 00:05:53,032
188
00:05:53,078 --> 00:05:55,646
Those next 10 seconds
lasted an eternity
189
00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:58,399
as my friends were
picked off one by one.
190
00:05:58,476 --> 00:06:00,521
They even got Taz Money... again!
191
00:06:00,585 --> 00:06:01,271
No!
192
00:06:02,022 --> 00:06:02,845
Next thing I knew,
193
00:06:02,886 --> 00:06:05,354
I was facing off against my destiny.
194
00:06:05,637 --> 00:06:08,172
Maybe it was panic.
Maybe it was nerd rage.
195
00:06:08,253 --> 00:06:09,345
Maybe it was the fact
196
00:06:09,391 --> 00:06:11,647
that my brother had been kicking
my butt my whole life.
197
00:06:11,715 --> 00:06:12,596
Aaaaaaah! But right then,
198
00:06:12,639 --> 00:06:14,807
I said, "No more".
199
00:06:14,964 --> 00:06:18,533
200
00:06:18,627 --> 00:06:20,070
[Thud]
201
00:06:20,122 --> 00:06:22,523
What the [bleep]
202
00:06:23,999 --> 00:06:27,381
Nice one, Goldfarb.
Walk it off, Goldberg.
203
00:06:27,748 --> 00:06:30,466
Ow. Ah...
204
00:06:32,898 --> 00:06:34,587
[Whimpers]
205
00:06:34,654 --> 00:06:36,455
[Breathing heavily]
206
00:06:39,731 --> 00:06:41,972
What did I just do?
207
00:06:42,040 --> 00:06:44,374
You just became hot, freshman.
208
00:06:44,444 --> 00:06:45,599
That was badass.
209
00:06:45,647 --> 00:06:48,473
In that one moment, I had
done the impossible!
210
00:06:48,552 --> 00:06:50,316
I became awesome!
211
00:06:50,359 --> 00:06:53,132
Meanwhile, the school time
capsule was a complete dud.
212
00:06:53,210 --> 00:06:55,935
Seriously? This is why
I had a sign-up sheet!
213
00:06:56,318 --> 00:06:57,446
Why do I even bother?
214
00:06:57,493 --> 00:06:58,937
Geoff: New Kids on the B., huh?
215
00:06:58,990 --> 00:07:02,058
You know, my Nana says that I look
like handsome renegade Donnie Wahlberg.
216
00:07:02,272 --> 00:07:05,674
Oh, your Nana is so sweet...
but... wrong.
217
00:07:07,754 --> 00:07:09,988
If you're any Donnie,
you're Donny Osmond.
218
00:07:10,056 --> 00:07:12,304
Clean and non-threatening.
219
00:07:12,372 --> 00:07:13,672
I dig that.
220
00:07:14,053 --> 00:07:15,372
Thanks?
221
00:07:16,307 --> 00:07:18,868
While our resident Duckie
was still looking for love,
222
00:07:18,942 --> 00:07:22,200
my mom was on a desperate
hunt for a blankie.
223
00:07:22,385 --> 00:07:25,068
What is this? You look insane.
224
00:07:25,145 --> 00:07:27,589
You haven't by chance
seen a baby blanket...
225
00:07:27,661 --> 00:07:30,135
Uh, blue, soft, precious
beyond measure...
226
00:07:30,207 --> 00:07:31,472
You know, a standard blankie?
227
00:07:31,522 --> 00:07:32,731
You mean that gross, blue rag
228
00:07:32,780 --> 00:07:34,552
that smells like chickenpox
and nightmare sweat?
229
00:07:34,611 --> 00:07:36,946
You shut your face-mouth!
But, yes, that's the one.
230
00:07:37,830 --> 00:07:39,966
Okay, don't freak out...
231
00:07:40,032 --> 00:07:41,390
but I took it.
232
00:07:41,441 --> 00:07:43,189
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
233
00:07:43,248 --> 00:07:45,082
I wrapped it around a New Kids plate
234
00:07:45,143 --> 00:07:46,518
and put it in a time capsule!
235
00:07:46,569 --> 00:07:47,956
No! No, no, no, no, no!
236
00:07:48,008 --> 00:07:49,969
That blankie is the only thing I have
237
00:07:50,032 --> 00:07:52,046
to remember my favorite baby!
238
00:07:52,110 --> 00:07:53,542
First of all, ouch.
239
00:07:53,595 --> 00:07:55,699
But I think this is a good thing.
240
00:07:55,764 --> 00:07:58,786
Your closet time is...
How do I put it?...
241
00:07:58,869 --> 00:08:00,875
Sad and creepy.
242
00:08:00,939 --> 00:08:02,641
This will force you to go cold turkey.
243
00:08:02,699 --> 00:08:05,188
Or I just dig it up first
thing in the morning!
244
00:08:05,261 --> 00:08:05,668
No.
245
00:08:05,701 --> 00:08:06,701
- Yes.
- No way.
246
00:08:06,735 --> 00:08:08,397
All people will remember all summer
247
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:10,883
is my crazy mom digging
up the school's front lawn.
248
00:08:10,954 --> 00:08:13,222
Good idea. You be my lookout.
249
00:08:13,291 --> 00:08:15,236
Don't even put
that thought in your mind.
250
00:08:15,298 --> 00:08:18,159
Too late. Look in my eyes, Erica.
251
00:08:18,239 --> 00:08:19,505
It's locked in.
252
00:08:19,555 --> 00:08:21,254
Come on, I need you.
253
00:08:21,312 --> 00:08:24,747
If you do this, I promise, next year,
254
00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:27,432
I will not go storming
down to the school.
255
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,707
Seriously? My whole senior year
256
00:08:29,774 --> 00:08:32,805
without my crazy mom roaming
the hallways like a blond ghost?
257
00:08:32,888 --> 00:08:33,888
That's what I'm promising.
258
00:08:33,946 --> 00:08:35,343
We dig during first period,
259
00:08:35,395 --> 00:08:37,557
while everyone is still
half asleep in class.
260
00:08:37,624 --> 00:08:38,358
Understand?
261
00:08:38,397 --> 00:08:39,931
You have my word, boop.
262
00:08:39,986 --> 00:08:42,379
You will not humiliate
me more than normal.
263
00:08:42,450 --> 00:08:45,737
We're gonna dig to get the blankie
264
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:47,796
Okay, that's... That's enough.
265
00:08:47,859 --> 00:08:51,033
And I'm gonna sniff it
'cause it's so snuggly
266
00:08:51,119 --> 00:08:52,962
You have a serious problem.
267
00:08:53,133 --> 00:08:55,116
There were only two days
left until summer,
268
00:08:55,179 --> 00:08:58,201
and that meant one thing...
Nobody cared.
269
00:08:58,284 --> 00:09:01,166
Okay, your calculus
teacher called in sick.
270
00:09:01,247 --> 00:09:02,698
Wish I'd have thought of it.
271
00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:05,277
So we're gonna watch
a math-based movie...
272
00:09:05,349 --> 00:09:07,001
"Cannonball Run II."
273
00:09:07,058 --> 00:09:08,281
How is that a math movie?
274
00:09:08,330 --> 00:09:11,798
"II." It's got a number in it... Math.
275
00:09:11,890 --> 00:09:13,421
Beverly: Psst. Snuggy.
276
00:09:13,475 --> 00:09:14,723
[Sighing] Oh.
277
00:09:15,241 --> 00:09:17,772
Mr. Coach Mellor, can
I go to the bathroom?
278
00:09:18,010 --> 00:09:20,293
279
00:09:20,588 --> 00:09:21,244
[Whispering] Hey,
280
00:09:21,282 --> 00:09:23,065
why are you going
to the bathroom with a shovel?
281
00:09:23,125 --> 00:09:24,916
Oh, is this a lady thing?
282
00:09:24,975 --> 00:09:27,868
No. I got to dig
up the stupid time capsule.
283
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,467
Oh, no.
284
00:09:29,516 --> 00:09:30,414
I'm boned.
285
00:09:30,511 --> 00:09:32,267
I stashed a tape professing
my love to Erica
286
00:09:32,326 --> 00:09:33,006
in that time capsule
287
00:09:33,044 --> 00:09:34,496
so that our kids could
hear it 30 years from now.
288
00:09:34,549 --> 00:09:35,789
Nice move, Duckie.
289
00:09:35,845 --> 00:09:37,587
I'm not Duckie! It's romantic.
290
00:09:37,646 --> 00:09:39,386
I even serenade her
with the power ballad
291
00:09:39,445 --> 00:09:40,545
"Heat of the Moment" by Asia.
292
00:09:40,591 --> 00:09:41,629
- It's classic Duckie, bro.
- Yeah.
293
00:09:41,674 --> 00:09:43,727
Aw, you're right! I got
to get that tape back.
294
00:09:43,792 --> 00:09:46,260
295
00:09:46,333 --> 00:09:47,800
[Both grunting]
296
00:09:47,853 --> 00:09:49,530
How are you so good at this?
297
00:09:49,587 --> 00:09:51,687
Jazzercise builds upper-body strength.
298
00:09:51,753 --> 00:09:53,424
Stop! You can't dig that up!
299
00:09:53,481 --> 00:09:55,221
You stop! We have one minute
till the bell rings,
300
00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:56,693
and then everyone will see us.
301
00:09:56,745 --> 00:09:58,446
Ooh! There! I see shiny metal.
302
00:09:58,504 --> 00:10:00,011
We're one scoop away. Wait, wait, wait!
303
00:10:00,065 --> 00:10:01,555
I'll help so I can open it first!
304
00:10:01,609 --> 00:10:03,443
Uh, aah! [Clang]
305
00:10:03,504 --> 00:10:05,996
Oh! Oh! [Screaming]
306
00:10:06,069 --> 00:10:06,832
D-D-D-Don't worry!
307
00:10:06,872 --> 00:10:08,816
I'll... I'll plug it with my body!
308
00:10:08,878 --> 00:10:10,431
[Screaming]
309
00:10:10,486 --> 00:10:12,016
Erica, save me!
310
00:10:12,071 --> 00:10:12,912
Geoff!
311
00:10:12,953 --> 00:10:14,170
My tummy's drowning!
312
00:10:14,219 --> 00:10:15,522
Oh, my God!
313
00:10:15,572 --> 00:10:16,743
Principal Ball: Beverly Goldberg!
314
00:10:16,791 --> 00:10:19,092
My office... now!
315
00:10:19,161 --> 00:10:21,520
May I ask what this is regarding?
316
00:10:21,591 --> 00:10:23,191
Aaah!
317
00:10:23,262 --> 00:10:24,395
As my mom and sister
318
00:10:24,442 --> 00:10:26,151
were flooding the front of the school,
319
00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:27,817
Barry was drowning in embarrassment
320
00:10:27,873 --> 00:10:29,659
from my epic body slam.
321
00:10:29,719 --> 00:10:31,219
Hey, man, how's your back?
322
00:10:31,283 --> 00:10:33,028
A little sore, but I'm on the mend.
323
00:10:33,087 --> 00:10:33,985
Thanks for asking.
324
00:10:34,027 --> 00:10:36,128
That wasn't concern. That was ridicule.
325
00:10:36,194 --> 00:10:38,722
Ha! You got flipped
on your ass like a turtle.
326
00:10:38,795 --> 00:10:39,669
[Laughs]
327
00:10:40,530 --> 00:10:43,161
JTP, I need your counsel immediately.
328
00:10:43,768 --> 00:10:46,526
Um... is it cool
if we talk after school...
329
00:10:46,604 --> 00:10:48,731
or later this summer?
330
00:10:48,797 --> 00:10:49,612
Yeah, the thing is,
331
00:10:49,653 --> 00:10:51,651
you got body-slammed
by a middle schooler,
332
00:10:51,715 --> 00:10:53,722
which makes you lower
than a freshman now,
333
00:10:53,785 --> 00:10:55,977
so we have to keep our distance.
334
00:10:56,045 --> 00:10:56,607
You get it.
335
00:10:56,643 --> 00:10:59,445
You guys can't blow me off.
I'm your leader. JTP!
336
00:11:03,185 --> 00:11:04,217
What the hell?
337
00:11:04,269 --> 00:11:06,838
You're supposed
to automatically repeat "JTP".
338
00:11:06,913 --> 00:11:08,814
Has the entire school turned on me?
339
00:11:09,101 --> 00:11:10,030
We need to talk.
340
00:11:10,082 --> 00:11:11,127
Oh, God, you're breaking up with me.
341
00:11:11,172 --> 00:11:13,038
No, of course not. Yet.
342
00:11:13,100 --> 00:11:15,129
- We just need to undo what happened.
- Right. Easy.
343
00:11:15,193 --> 00:11:16,974
So, just lure Adam into a public space
344
00:11:17,033 --> 00:11:18,890
and dispense a swift
beatdown for all to see.
345
00:11:18,951 --> 00:11:20,832
Done. Quick question.
346
00:11:20,931 --> 00:11:22,603
Is there anything else I can do
347
00:11:22,660 --> 00:11:24,534
- that doesn't require me going near him?
- Why?
348
00:11:24,595 --> 00:11:28,064
I'm, like... How would you put it?...
349
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:29,826
Very afraid of him.
350
00:11:30,609 --> 00:11:32,128
Adam, your nerdy brother,
351
00:11:32,182 --> 00:11:34,267
who dives for cover when
someone pops a balloon?
352
00:11:34,332 --> 00:11:35,338
Correct.
353
00:11:36,481 --> 00:11:37,332
This is a lot.
354
00:11:37,389 --> 00:11:39,856
As Barry was facing
his cold, dark future,
355
00:11:39,928 --> 00:11:41,888
my sister was feeling the heat.
356
00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:43,590
Congrats. Your little stunt
357
00:11:43,647 --> 00:11:46,278
broke the water line leading
to the locker room.
358
00:11:46,569 --> 00:11:50,059
You ruined both Freshman Fear Week
359
00:11:50,151 --> 00:11:51,618
and a timeless tradition
360
00:11:51,672 --> 00:11:54,007
started by the great
William Penn himself,
361
00:11:54,077 --> 00:11:57,778
who, after he founded
this institution in 1689,
362
00:11:57,874 --> 00:12:00,349
immediately threw a freshman
into the showers!
363
00:12:00,421 --> 00:12:02,389
[Clears throat]
364
00:12:02,452 --> 00:12:05,786
Oh, yeah, and, uh,
there are some people
365
00:12:05,875 --> 00:12:08,678
who are also very upset
about their pet project.
366
00:12:08,757 --> 00:12:10,083
Yes, I am upset.
367
00:12:10,134 --> 00:12:12,789
Everything in the time capsule
was completely ruined.
368
00:12:12,865 --> 00:12:13,270
Yes!
369
00:12:13,303 --> 00:12:15,217
Oh, everything except this one thing.
370
00:12:15,279 --> 00:12:16,412
No!
371
00:12:16,781 --> 00:12:18,351
We should throw that away
just to be fair.
372
00:12:18,407 --> 00:12:19,841
Oh, I think this is for you.
373
00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:24,887
"For future wife Erica Schwartz.
Love, your future hubby"?
374
00:12:25,132 --> 00:12:25,960
Really, dude?
375
00:12:26,002 --> 00:12:27,172
- Aww.
- Awkward.
376
00:12:27,219 --> 00:12:29,887
Geoff, for the millionth time,
I don't like you that way...
377
00:12:29,964 --> 00:12:32,277
Not now, not in the future, not ever.
378
00:12:32,841 --> 00:12:34,736
So I really am the Duckie.
379
00:12:35,299 --> 00:12:37,501
The dork from "Pretty in Pink"?
380
00:12:37,578 --> 00:12:40,857
Yes, that's a great example.
That's exactly who you are.
381
00:12:40,945 --> 00:12:42,479
I think Duckie's cute.
382
00:12:43,167 --> 00:12:44,211
Thanks.
383
00:12:44,378 --> 00:12:46,671
Okay, this conversation's gotten
away from me.
384
00:12:46,740 --> 00:12:48,074
Let's just wrap it up.
385
00:12:48,488 --> 00:12:50,970
Both of you are suspended for the day.
386
00:12:51,043 --> 00:12:51,851
Called your parents.
387
00:12:51,892 --> 00:12:53,086
They're on their way to pick you up.
388
00:12:53,134 --> 00:12:54,492
Message received. Come on, Schmoo.
389
00:12:54,543 --> 00:12:57,221
Buh-buh-buh-bip! I called your husband.
390
00:12:57,463 --> 00:12:59,643
I'm suspending you
from parenting for the day.
391
00:12:59,710 --> 00:13:02,345
Nice try, but Murray won't
care unless money's involved.
392
00:13:02,421 --> 00:13:04,220
Here's the bill.
393
00:13:05,041 --> 00:13:08,965
Are you kidding me?! 600
bucks for a broken pipe?!
394
00:13:09,938 --> 00:13:14,017
Well... the headline here
is, I saved Blankie.
395
00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:14,360
[Chuckles]
396
00:13:14,390 --> 00:13:17,394
Sure, it's lost its Adam smell,
but I'll just recharge it.
397
00:13:17,477 --> 00:13:18,642
You can't recharge a blanket.
398
00:13:18,690 --> 00:13:20,407
Ho-ho! You bet I can!
399
00:13:20,465 --> 00:13:22,120
I'll just sneak it into his pillowcase
400
00:13:22,177 --> 00:13:24,278
or mix it in his hamper like a stew.
401
00:13:24,343 --> 00:13:26,411
Don't do that. Don't
make a hamper stew.
402
00:13:26,476 --> 00:13:29,669
I just... I need the blanket.
403
00:13:30,121 --> 00:13:32,339
Once they grow up, it's all I'll have.
404
00:13:32,407 --> 00:13:34,577
Look, I know how hard this is for you.
405
00:13:34,644 --> 00:13:35,697
I do.
406
00:13:35,743 --> 00:13:37,625
They're more than my world, Murray.
407
00:13:37,686 --> 00:13:38,856
They're my life.
408
00:13:38,904 --> 00:13:41,473
If I'm not Mama, what am I?
409
00:13:42,460 --> 00:13:44,101
Well, that's up to you.
410
00:13:44,158 --> 00:13:46,492
While my mom had to figure
out her place in the world,
411
00:13:46,562 --> 00:13:48,926
I was loving my new life as a cool kid.
412
00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:50,832
Gummi Bears
413
00:13:50,893 --> 00:13:53,915
Bouncing here and there
and everywhere
414
00:13:53,998 --> 00:13:57,234
High adventure
that's beyond compare
415
00:13:57,321 --> 00:14:00,157
They are the Gummi Bears
416
00:14:00,237 --> 00:14:01,958
Look at him sitting there, Pops,
417
00:14:02,016 --> 00:14:04,194
acting like a badass street punk.
418
00:14:04,261 --> 00:14:05,228
- Adam?
- Correct.
419
00:14:05,272 --> 00:14:08,075
With the cartoons -
and the gelatin candies?
420
00:14:08,154 --> 00:14:10,722
He thinks he's bad? Well,
I'll show him who's bad.
421
00:14:10,796 --> 00:14:12,381
I wouldn't do that if I were you.
422
00:14:12,794 --> 00:14:13,426
Why not?
423
00:14:13,464 --> 00:14:15,501
'Cause I'm enjoying my leisure time.
424
00:14:15,565 --> 00:14:18,103
If I stand up, you're gonna regret it.
425
00:14:18,177 --> 00:14:19,344
I can't live this way!
426
00:14:19,392 --> 00:14:21,835
You ruined my life by fighting
back and winning!
427
00:14:21,907 --> 00:14:23,792
Hey, I needed a win!
428
00:14:23,853 --> 00:14:26,617
Do you realize how crappy
this year has been for me?
429
00:14:26,695 --> 00:14:30,295
I lost my girlfriend, puberty
was not kind to my body,
430
00:14:30,389 --> 00:14:32,419
and I got pantsed on the pull-up bar,
431
00:14:32,483 --> 00:14:33,683
undies and all!
432
00:14:33,810 --> 00:14:36,112
And then you tried to kick
me when I was down!
433
00:14:36,182 --> 00:14:38,630
No! I was trying to help you!
434
00:14:38,702 --> 00:14:39,794
By throwing me in the showers?!
435
00:14:39,840 --> 00:14:41,454
Yes, idiot!
436
00:14:41,510 --> 00:14:43,846
Only the cool kids get
hazed during Fear Week.
437
00:14:43,916 --> 00:14:46,524
When I was your age, no
one picked on me, and it sucked!
438
00:14:46,599 --> 00:14:48,400
I didn't want it to suck for you, too!
439
00:14:49,424 --> 00:14:52,314
I...didn't know that.
440
00:14:52,822 --> 00:14:55,753
Well... looks like next year
is gonna be awesome...
441
00:14:56,271 --> 00:14:57,348
for you, anyway.
442
00:14:57,394 --> 00:15:01,158
443
00:15:02,089 --> 00:15:03,199
It had been a day
444
00:15:03,246 --> 00:15:05,354
since I robbed Barry
of his pride and dignity.
445
00:15:05,419 --> 00:15:07,323
He was not taking it well.
446
00:15:07,385 --> 00:15:10,154
Goodbye, nunchucks.
I will need you no more.
447
00:15:10,241 --> 00:15:12,508
Find a master who's not a wussbag.
448
00:15:12,577 --> 00:15:15,699
Arigato, samurai sword.
449
00:15:15,784 --> 00:15:18,916
This is not a place of honor.
It's a place of shame.
450
00:15:19,001 --> 00:15:21,147
What did you do to the boy?
451
00:15:21,214 --> 00:15:23,057
He's trying to murder that garbage can.
452
00:15:23,117 --> 00:15:24,584
This isn't my fault.
453
00:15:24,638 --> 00:15:25,567
Did Barry seriously think
454
00:15:25,610 --> 00:15:27,593
I'd be a nerdy little brother forever?
455
00:15:27,656 --> 00:15:28,857
Actually, yes.
456
00:15:28,905 --> 00:15:31,294
Look at me. I'm getting
older and bigger.
457
00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:32,082
Things change.
458
00:15:32,121 --> 00:15:33,737
Well, no matter how big you get,
459
00:15:33,794 --> 00:15:36,096
you're always gonna be
Barry's little brother,
460
00:15:36,165 --> 00:15:38,047
and that means a lot to him.
461
00:15:38,108 --> 00:15:39,349
He sure doesn't act like it.
462
00:15:39,399 --> 00:15:42,179
Trust me, he loves being
your big brother.
463
00:15:42,257 --> 00:15:44,525
I-It's a huge part of who he is,
464
00:15:44,594 --> 00:15:48,448
and without that...
he's just not the same.
465
00:15:49,251 --> 00:15:51,045
Hey, Big Tasty, we need to talk.
466
00:15:51,105 --> 00:15:52,196
Whatever! Just stay away!
467
00:15:52,346 --> 00:15:53,692
Not that I'm scared of you,
468
00:15:53,743 --> 00:15:55,271
but, please, don't put hands on me.
469
00:15:55,326 --> 00:15:55,942
Come on, dude,
470
00:15:55,979 --> 00:15:58,703
we both know the only reason
I could body-slam you
471
00:15:58,781 --> 00:16:00,115
was the summer solstice.
472
00:16:00,175 --> 00:16:00,846
Summer what?
473
00:16:00,884 --> 00:16:02,983
You know, the one day a year
474
00:16:03,048 --> 00:16:04,797
when the moon is closest to the earth,
475
00:16:04,856 --> 00:16:06,266
which means there's less gravity?
476
00:16:06,319 --> 00:16:08,020
- There is?
- Yes.
477
00:16:08,077 --> 00:16:10,846
That's how a nerd like me
suddenly had super strength.
478
00:16:10,925 --> 00:16:11,875
It's science.
479
00:16:11,918 --> 00:16:14,182
Science, you say? Like
the kind with scientists?
480
00:16:14,251 --> 00:16:15,374
Oh, sure!
481
00:16:15,421 --> 00:16:18,279
With white lab coats
and clipboards and safety goggles.
482
00:16:18,359 --> 00:16:20,053
- Beakers?
- Tons of beakers, yeah.
483
00:16:20,110 --> 00:16:21,577
They hold them up the light and nod?
484
00:16:21,631 --> 00:16:23,403
How else would they see the chemicals?
485
00:16:24,192 --> 00:16:27,677
I knew there was no way
that happened for real!
486
00:16:27,776 --> 00:16:28,791
[Chuckles]
487
00:16:28,836 --> 00:16:30,921
So the balance of power
has been restored.
488
00:16:30,986 --> 00:16:31,930
You can be you again.
489
00:16:31,973 --> 00:16:33,416
It's not that easy!
490
00:16:33,469 --> 00:16:36,272
The whole school witnessed this
once-in-a-lifetime moment.
491
00:16:36,351 --> 00:16:37,417
It can't be undone.
492
00:16:37,463 --> 00:16:39,660
Actually, I think it can.
493
00:16:40,037 --> 00:16:43,272
494
00:16:44,352 --> 00:16:47,023
Okay! Not that complicated, people.
495
00:16:47,099 --> 00:16:48,887
I call your name,
496
00:16:48,947 --> 00:16:51,484
and then you go up and get
the piece of paper.
497
00:16:51,557 --> 00:16:53,845
But no showboating, no speeches,
498
00:16:53,914 --> 00:16:55,186
and no doing the worm, Dave Kim.
499
00:16:55,236 --> 00:16:56,742
I am onto you.
500
00:16:56,796 --> 00:16:58,224
This is America, man.
501
00:16:58,277 --> 00:17:00,486
Barry: Mic check, 1, 2. 1, 2.
502
00:17:00,554 --> 00:17:01,529
Mic check, 1, 2.
503
00:17:01,573 --> 00:17:03,007
Checkity-check-check.
504
00:17:03,059 --> 00:17:05,494
Stop checking and just
talk before we get busted!
505
00:17:05,554 --> 00:17:07,607
Attention, William Penn Academy!
506
00:17:07,672 --> 00:17:09,139
Prepare to bear witness
507
00:17:09,192 --> 00:17:12,386
to the most epic Fear
Week Prank of all time.
508
00:17:12,472 --> 00:17:15,708
Eighth graders, welcome to high school.
509
00:17:15,948 --> 00:17:17,238
Go kick some ass.
510
00:17:17,288 --> 00:17:18,722
I'm back, baby.
511
00:17:18,775 --> 00:17:20,705
[Asia's "Heat of the Moment" plays]
512
00:17:20,768 --> 00:17:21,400
Adult Adam: That day,
513
00:17:21,437 --> 00:17:24,025
I helped my brother
repair his damaged rep
514
00:17:24,100 --> 00:17:25,067
in one fell swoop.
515
00:17:25,098 --> 00:17:27,847
No! This is my graduation turtleneck!
516
00:17:27,925 --> 00:17:28,524
One thing I said
that I would never do
517
00:17:28,561 --> 00:17:28,787
[Bell rings]
518
00:17:28,817 --> 00:17:32,213
Just like that, all memories
of my brother getting body-slammed
519
00:17:32,303 --> 00:17:34,419
were completely washed away.
520
00:17:34,485 --> 00:17:37,654
I'm not a freshman! I'm
the principal, damn it!
521
00:17:37,740 --> 00:17:40,092
It's not funny when it happens to you!
522
00:17:40,162 --> 00:17:42,480
Dude, Goldberg just showered
the whole eighth grade!
523
00:17:42,550 --> 00:17:45,150
[Laughing] No way! Legendary!
524
00:17:45,225 --> 00:17:46,583
Classic Tasty!
525
00:17:46,634 --> 00:17:47,586
Growing up, we all have
526
00:17:47,630 --> 00:17:49,527
those magical moments etched in stone.
527
00:17:49,588 --> 00:17:52,602
For Barry Norman Goldberg,
his moment was now.
528
00:17:52,685 --> 00:17:55,183
Middle school's over, losers!
529
00:17:55,256 --> 00:17:58,450
Oh, my God, he's right!
Middle school's over!
530
00:17:58,537 --> 00:18:00,700
And we would scream
together songs unsung
531
00:18:00,766 --> 00:18:01,493
[Cheering]
532
00:18:01,533 --> 00:18:03,734
I think next year's gonna
be pretty damn awesome.
533
00:18:03,801 --> 00:18:04,386
It was the heat of the moment
534
00:18:04,423 --> 00:18:06,281
- I'm happy for you.
- For both of us.
535
00:18:06,342 --> 00:18:07,861
I'll make sure of it.
536
00:18:07,915 --> 00:18:09,523
But until then...
537
00:18:09,579 --> 00:18:11,093
Wait. What are you...
538
00:18:11,147 --> 00:18:12,380
The heat of the moment
539
00:18:12,429 --> 00:18:14,107
[Laughter] Yeah!
540
00:18:14,165 --> 00:18:14,976
JTP!
541
00:18:15,017 --> 00:18:16,601
JTP!
542
00:18:16,956 --> 00:18:19,191
And now you find yourself in '82
543
00:18:19,259 --> 00:18:21,327
Principal Ball: I want
all of you to go back to class!
544
00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:22,478
All of you!
545
00:18:23,406 --> 00:18:24,774
Let it happen, Earl.
546
00:18:24,825 --> 00:18:28,534
This prank deserves our respect.
Let it happen.
547
00:18:28,630 --> 00:18:30,230
Turns out, Freshman Fear Week
548
00:18:30,286 --> 00:18:32,027
was one of the best weeks of my life.
549
00:18:32,086 --> 00:18:34,397
We not only survived
the rite of passage,
550
00:18:34,466 --> 00:18:36,777
we soared right through it.
551
00:18:36,847 --> 00:18:40,744
Geoff:
[Off-key] 'Cause
it's the heat of the moment
552
00:18:40,844 --> 00:18:43,490
Heat of the moment
553
00:18:43,820 --> 00:18:45,530
Guys, you've got to hear this tape
554
00:18:45,588 --> 00:18:47,185
that Geoff Schwartz made me.
555
00:18:47,241 --> 00:18:49,625
He, like, rambles
on about how special I am.
556
00:18:49,696 --> 00:18:51,163
Such a dork.
557
00:18:51,217 --> 00:18:52,104
- Oh.
- Enough.
558
00:18:52,146 --> 00:18:52,759
- What?
559
00:18:52,796 --> 00:18:54,564
All year, you've been saying
you don't like the guy.
560
00:18:54,623 --> 00:18:55,656
That's 'cause I don't.
561
00:18:56,337 --> 00:18:57,138
- [Scoffs]
- What?
562
00:18:57,179 --> 00:19:00,827
But I don't. I don't
like Geoff Schwartz.
563
00:19:02,676 --> 00:19:04,039
It's crazy how sometimes
564
00:19:04,090 --> 00:19:05,838
your life can change in a flash...
565
00:19:05,897 --> 00:19:08,716
and all the things you were
blind to or refuse to admit
566
00:19:08,795 --> 00:19:11,520
are suddenly staring
you right in the face.
567
00:19:11,598 --> 00:19:14,284
Damn it, I like stupid Geoff Schwartz.
568
00:19:14,360 --> 00:19:17,773
And just like that, everything
suddenly falls into place...
569
00:19:17,926 --> 00:19:19,793
Uh, Geoff, can we t...
570
00:19:19,854 --> 00:19:21,727
Come on, sweetie, we got
to get to Blockbuster.
571
00:19:21,788 --> 00:19:23,756
Even if it's not the way
you thought it would.
572
00:19:23,819 --> 00:19:25,286
Hey, do you need something?
573
00:19:25,340 --> 00:19:27,908
It's... nothing.
574
00:19:28,380 --> 00:19:29,645
The heat of the moment
showed in your eyes
575
00:19:29,695 --> 00:19:31,387
Uh, h-have a great summer.
576
00:19:31,445 --> 00:19:33,046
Yeah, have a summer.
577
00:19:33,310 --> 00:19:35,311
Yeah, growing up is tough...
578
00:19:35,374 --> 00:19:37,079
but no matter how hard it gets,
579
00:19:37,137 --> 00:19:39,393
you can always look
forward to the future.
580
00:19:39,462 --> 00:19:40,546
Heat of the moment How do I look?
581
00:19:40,592 --> 00:19:42,341
Like my big boy. [Chuckles]
582
00:19:42,400 --> 00:19:44,712
Heat of the moment
showed in your eyes
583
00:19:44,781 --> 00:19:46,428
My big man.
584
00:19:46,699 --> 00:19:48,863
For me, I didn't know
what life would bring.
585
00:19:48,930 --> 00:19:50,545
And, sure, that was scary.
586
00:19:50,601 --> 00:19:53,186
But for the first time,
I wasn't so afraid.
587
00:19:53,261 --> 00:19:58,392
Congratulations, graduating
middle-school class of 198...
588
00:19:58,554 --> 00:20:00,121
[Feedback squeals, cheers and applause]
589
00:20:00,176 --> 00:20:01,786
It was the end of an era...
590
00:20:01,842 --> 00:20:03,008
You're the cutest!
591
00:20:03,074 --> 00:20:04,941
And the start of a brand-new one...
592
00:20:05,012 --> 00:20:07,180
Oh, just look at him.
593
00:20:07,256 --> 00:20:09,524
We are gonna have so
much fun in high school.
594
00:20:09,602 --> 00:20:11,252
- "We"?
- You know, you were right.
595
00:20:11,309 --> 00:20:13,745
I do need a life outside the house,
596
00:20:13,817 --> 00:20:16,948
and that is why I'm gonna get
my teaching certificate.
597
00:20:17,033 --> 00:20:18,800
What have you done, Murray?
598
00:20:18,859 --> 00:20:20,339
In more ways than one.
599
00:20:20,393 --> 00:20:22,158
Oh, and I want this to be a surprise,
600
00:20:22,217 --> 00:20:23,985
so don't tell the kids, okay?
601
00:20:24,053 --> 00:20:26,608
Don't worry, we'll let you
deliver that message.
602
00:20:26,683 --> 00:20:28,783
That's the thing
about our greatest memories.
603
00:20:28,848 --> 00:20:30,494
Sure, we don't always remember
604
00:20:30,551 --> 00:20:32,706
exactly who was there
or how it happened.
605
00:20:32,772 --> 00:20:36,005
All I remember was the blur
of 1980-something,
606
00:20:36,546 --> 00:20:38,914
and it was awesome.
607
00:20:39,452 --> 00:20:41,857
- Luck Tin Tin, save me!
- Luck Tin Tin, save me!
608
00:20:41,929 --> 00:20:44,169
Luck Tin Tin, attack!
[Indistinct shouting]
609
00:20:44,237 --> 00:20:45,971
- Oh!
- Aah!
610
00:20:46,029 --> 00:20:49,298
611
00:20:53,558 --> 00:20:55,714
[Cheers and laughter]
612
00:20:55,827 --> 00:21:00,013
Okay, as you know, you've been mocking
my changing voice for this entire year.
613
00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:01,890
But now that I'm going to high school,
614
00:21:01,949 --> 00:21:05,378
it's time for you to get
out all your insults here and now
615
00:21:05,469 --> 00:21:07,734
so we can bring this hurtful
chapter to a close.
616
00:21:07,802 --> 00:21:09,441
You sound like a harmonica in a dryer.
617
00:21:09,498 --> 00:21:12,293
You sound like the child of Louis
Armstrong and Harvey Fierstein.
618
00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:14,940
You sound like the Tin
Man before he was oiled.
619
00:21:15,014 --> 00:21:17,701
You sound like a witch
gave a frog a voice.
620
00:21:17,778 --> 00:21:19,987
Stop it! His voice is perfect.
621
00:21:20,054 --> 00:21:22,722
He sounds like a beautiful angel...
622
00:21:22,855 --> 00:21:25,256
with an undescended testicle.
623
00:21:25,327 --> 00:21:26,627
I regret this.
624
00:21:26,677 --> 00:21:31,227
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