Original subtitles

??

??

Tim, we meet again.

Great to be back in Amsterdam.

Love this town.

Hello, Maximilian.

Do you think you can at least try

to get along with this foster family?

Who's Maximilian?

Sorry. Max.

No more 3:00 A.M. hip-hop concert.

No more bubble wrap under the toilet seat.

And no more stray dog stampedes.

I... I mean it!

I didn't have anything to do with those dogs.

Then how did they get in the house?

Maybe they had their own key.

This is your last chance. I'm all out of families.

If it doesn't work out with the Hunters,

you're gonna have to go to Blackfriar's.

The orphanage?

I hear they serve nothing but gruel seven days a week.

That's not true.

They serve it six days a week.

On Sundays, you go hungry.

What? I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

It's not that bad.

But I guarantee, the Hunters' is nicer.

Now, if I could only find it...

I'll guide you.

??

(Tim) Erik and Kate have taken in four foster kids already

and they all get along great.

(Max) I'll try to try. Take a right here.

(Tim) Cool.

We're here.

This isn't the house.

It's not?

Must be something wrong with my phone.

But, hey, since we're here,

how about some fries? Your treat.

(Anika) Come on, hurry, Sal!

Now, Sal? Can I do it now?

Take it easy, Anika.

(beep)

We have to do both photos at the same time.

We need somebody else.

What do you say, Daniel?

I'm working on my own project.

(Sal) Tess?

(sighs) Why do we need somebody else?

Just do it yourself. I can't.

I need to record the results for later analysis.

What are you monsters up to?

We're doing an experiment.

(Sal) Trying to.

I need another research assistant.

What kind of experiment?

Carbon dioxide reactivity.

We're gonna see which soda shoots higher,

normal or diet Colazzer.

You want to do this in the house?

For science?

Sounds good to me!

??

(Tim) Definitely no stray dog stampedes in here.

I feel ya.

(beep)

(Sal) I'm rolling.

When I give the signal.

Oh, hold on.

I need another mint.

Oh, stop eating the mints, Nika!

They're so good.

Three...

two...

one, and... (doorbell rings)

He's here.

Guess we'll have to pick this up later.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, guys, you know the deal.

As soon as Max steps inside,

he is not a foster kid, he is a Hunter,

same as all of us, okay?

Let's do our best to make him feel like one, okay?

Okay. Okay! Yeah.

(Erik) Tess?

Can I at least get a thumbs-up?

Brilliant.

Hi, Tim.

And you must be Maximilian.

Hi! I'm Kate.

What's up, Kate?

Come on in.

(whispering) What?

??

Aye, wow.

(Max) Wow.

I'm Erik Hunter.

Welcome, Maximilian.

??

(creaking, light switch clicks)

Nice place. Hmm.

Looks like a museum.

Well, it is a museum, at least part-time.

But most importantly, it's your new home.

Did you buy all this stuff?

Most of it has been in my family for generations.

It's pretty valuable,

but we're not gonna sell any of it.

If we did, the next generation

wouldn't be able to enjoy it, hmm?

Come on.

Let's meet everyone.

(Erik) This is Anika.

Sal.

Tess.

(clears throat)

And this big guy is Daniel.

Dude!

You are cut like a canned ham.

Is adopting kids from all over the world

like your thing or something?

(laughs) No.

The Hunters adopted me when I was a kid.

They brought me over from the UK.

It's the best thing that ever happened to me.

I'm just paying it forward.

(Max) It's gonna take me a while to learn everyone's names,

so in the meantime, you look smart.

Yes!

So I'm gonna call you... Mega Brain.

You'll be... Alt Girl.

And you'll be...

Canned Ham.

What about me?

I think I'll call you Spunky Monkey.

(chuckles) Can I call you Dude Bro?

Call me anything, except for Maximilian.

So what do you guys do for fun around here?

Well, actually, Sal is in the middle

of a scientific experiment.

He needs another research assistant.

Interested?

Sounds kinda boring.

Not this experiment.

If you say so, Spunky.

Is it my breath?

I brushed before I came here, all right?

All right, not really, but...

Wait, wait!

The mint is for the experiment.

When Sal gives the signal, drop it in the soda.

Huh?

You'll see.

(Sal) And... drop!

(shouting and laughter)

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

Whoa!

Oh, my gosh, the diet Colazzer went way higher!

You guys are not like other families I've stayed with.

Now let's show Max around the house.

(Erik) Who wants to do the honors?

Oh, I'll do it, I'll do it!

You don't want us to clean up the mess?

No, we'll take care of that.

All right, Mega Brain. Give me the grand tour.

Right, Dude Bro. Follow me.

Oh, wait, um, this is the rec room, by the way.

Right, 'cause you wreck it.

(Erik and Kate chuckling)

The kitchen.

This is Anika's room.

Daniel's room.

Library.

You're losing the room, dude.

Tess's room.

I'm busy!

And last but not least... our room.

You guys hungry? I'm ordering pizza.

Oh, can we get a Sal special?

I already got it down.

Garlic, mozzarella, fresh basil,

and a hint of parmesan cheese.

So what would you like on your pizza, Max?

No. Don't tell me, don't tell me.

You seem like the adventurous type.

How about...

pulled pork and peaches?

That sounds really...

Appalling. ...amazing.

'Cause I'll eat it all. It's all mine!

There's another one coming, by the way.

(Erik) Whee! (all cheering)

Okay!

No, stop!

Please, come on, stop!

(indistinct chatter)

So have you been here the longest?

Actually, Anika's been here for the longest.

Hmm. (Anika) Mm-hmm.

Erik and Kate adopted me when I was just a baby.

And I've been in the family for five... five years.

Daniel and Tess were already here when I came.

We were such an awesome family...

before Sal came.

(laughter)

Kidding!

I don't know, in... in all the other

foster families I've been in,

I've always felt like, you know,

an extra chair or something.

It's pretty cool you guys call this your family.

We don't just call it a family,

we are a family.

(Daniel) You'll see.

Cheers. To Max.

Cheers, buddy! Whoo! Cheers!

Cheers, Max! Whoo!

(Erik) Welcome.

??

(knocking, door opens)

Hey.

Hey.

Just wanted to see how you're doin'.

Do you need anything?

Uh, no. Everything's great.

You're all so... great.

So, Max, I don't know

too much about your history

or what you've been through,

but if there's ever anything you want to talk about,

Erik and I are here for you, okay?

Of course, you don't have to.

It's only if you feel like it.

What's important to me is that you realize

that this is your house now.

This is your home.

I, uh, like your dress.

Well, thank you.

Erik and I are going to the opera.

(doorbell rings) Have fun.

We'll be home real late,

so you try and have a good night's sleep, okay?

Thanks, Kate... uh, for everything.

(man) Don't be an idiot, Hunter.

(Erik) Please, lower your voice.

Do me a favor. Take my offer.

You're never gonna get any better.

Right... because I'll never sell.

Everything's for sale, Hunter.

It's just a matter of finding the right price.

Not this house.

This is my home.

And more importantly, my children's.

(chuckles) Yeah.

Well, with my offer,

you could buy your children their own island, hmm?

Who's buying an island?

Nobody. I was just explaining

to Mr. Brule how our house is not for sale.

Maybe you can talk some sense into him, Mrs. Hunter.

You're barking up the wrong tree, Mr. Brule.

You're making a mistake.

Wow! You look stunning.

(chuckling) Thank you.

(Erik) Let's go.

??

(door closes)

??

??

Erik?

Kate?

Guys, wake up! Erik and Kate are gone!

(line ringing)

This is the voicemail of Erik Hunter.

Messages after the beep.

(beep)

22...

Straight to voicemail again.

23...

Maybe they stayed at a hotel or something.

Why would they do that? And why wouldn't they call?

Maybe...

they didn't want to wake us up!

29... 30.

Are you gonna keep doing that?

Exercise helps me clear my head.

All you do is exercise.

And my head is always clear.

(rumbling) I'm hungry.

Oh, Kate always makes breakfast.

I'll do it!

What? I'm a great cook.

??

What's this?

It looks really bad.

It's all burnt.

Good morning, my peeps.

What's for breakfast?

Maybe I'll order in.

We have a problem.

Kate and Erik didn't come home last night.

What do you mean they didn't come home?

This is totally unlike them.

We have no idea where they could be.

But I'm sure that they're fine.

What do we do?

(Sal) We stay calm...

and track Erik's cell phone.

Here... it... comes!

(Max) "Phone not found."

Great. Can we freak out now?

One... two...

Does he always do that in a crisis?

He's just clearing his head.

How's your head, Daniel?

Could be clearer.

Last night, before they went to the opera,

I heard Erik arguing with someone.

He called him... Brule.

Do you think this guy did something?

They have an argument like once a week.

Mr. Brule's been trying to buy the house.

He's a bit of a jerk, but basically harmless.

Well, I don't understand why we're just sitting around.

We should go look for Erik and Kate.

We should go to the opera house.

Maybe someone there saw something.

That's a great idea. Let's do it, come on!

You guys should really eat something before you go.

49... 50! All clear!

??

It's the Sunday matinee. Erik takes me sometimes.

You like opera?

Oh, yeah!

I mean...

it's okay.

Thank you very much. Enjoy the show, sir.

Oh, oh, oh. Tickets, please. Tickets, please.

Our parents were here last night.

Oh, that's great. So were 1,600 other people.

Now show me your tickets.

Maybe you know them. Erik Hunter?

And Kate Hunter.

Erik and Kate Hunter? They're your parents?

You know them?

Never heard of them. Now show me your tickets.

Look... our dad lost his wallet

last night and he sent us down here

to see if we could find it.

And we just wanted to get a quick look around. Yeah!

You'll never even know we were here.

Take a hike.

What's the big deal? Come on.

Tell your father to look for the lost and found.

Now, get out of here.

What are you doing?

Looking for clues.

Tess... there's nothing here.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

Do you think they're okay?

Tell me the truth.

Just 'cause I'm the youngest,

that doesn't mean people should lie to me.

I do think they're okay. I really do.

Then where could they be?

What are you doing? This isn't helping.

But it sure is fun.

(laughter)

(gasps)

We're in trouble now. Eeh!

What's that?

No idea.

Who are they?

I don't know that, either.

But I do know one thing.

Anika, we found our first clue.

??

Now what?

Let me see.

I know.

We round up 100 rats,

right, let them loose in the opera,

everyone runs out screaming, and we sneak inside.

Even if we could find that many rats,

to transport them we'd need cages

and we'd probably get bit.

How about this? We call up,

and we tell them there's a zombie

in the men's room...

sitting on the toilet.

A zombie?

What do you got, Mega Brain?

Oh, don't strain your brain.

I got it.

What? Come on.

(Daniel) "How to cook your first meal."

"Canned ham."

I don't think so.

You mad, bro? Just 'cause Max didn't

give you a cool nickname like Alt Girl?

Or Spunky Monkey.

Who cares what some twerp calls me?

Whatcha got there?

We found it in Kate and Erik's room.

It was hidden behind the painting of them.

(Daniel) Two old geezers in weird clothes.

Big whoop.

Danny, aren't you worried about Erik and Kate?

Of course I am, but I'm sure there's a logical explanation,

and they're gonna walk in that door any minute.

Don't you think it's kind of weird...

that it was hidden? I mean...

why would they do that?

There's something written on it.

"Saga."

What's Saga?

It looks like there's more to it,

but it... it's too faint to read.

Oh, yeah. This works.

(Sal) Why do I have to be the girl?

You look good. (sighs)

(man) What are you doing back here?

You should be on stage. It's show time.

Right, right.

Um... Brucedonna here had to pee.

Brunhilda!

How old are you?

Run. (man) Hey, come back here!

Hey!

Where are we going? Erik and Kate's seats.

The balcony, follow me!

??

Let's see what's for dinner.

Piece of cake.

(grunting)

(opera singing)

(patrons muttering)

Where? Seats six and seven.

(usher) There they are.

Get over here, you little hoodlums.

Max?

Just... do something.

Now! What?

Do what they do in movies. Create a diversion.

??

(record scratching)

(usher) You! Hey, you!

What are you doing there?

Get over here, come on!

You're getting out of here right now.

Look.

What? What does it mean?

I don't know. Let's find out.

?? (fire alarm beeping)

What's happening?

Nothing! I'm just making dinner.

It'll be ready in five minutes.

(new alarm beeping)

Better make it ten.

(doorbell rings) I got it.

Daniel, is everything okay?

I heard the alarm.

Should I call the fire department?

Yes. I mean, no.

Um, I mean... you're fine.

??

(birds chirping)

Daniel...

you also look fine. (giggles)

I do?

Are your parents home? (record scratching)

Uh, yeah.

That's exactly where they are... home.

I mean, where else would they be at dinnertime?

Um, Kate is actually helping me.

Or... Or I'm helping her.

It's all good.

All right.

Well, enjoy your spaghetti.

How'd you know we're having spaghetti?

Just a hunch. See ya.

What a disaster.

I just wanted to surprise you guys

with a healthy, home-cooked meal.

I'm useless.

No, you're not. We tasted your sauce.

What'd you think?

It was good. What's your secret?

Oh, well, it was nothing really.

I mean, once I got the jar open...

Did they come home?

Call, text?

Oh, you guys are just in time for dinner.

Yeah, nice decoration job.

The spaghetti sauce on the walls really ties the room together.

Oh, ha-ha.

So you guys were gone for a long time.

Did you find anything?

We found this...

under Erik and Kate's seats.

(Sal) It's Kate's handwriting, no doubt.

Any idea what it means?

(Tess) "Saganash"?

It was hidden behind that hideous picture

of Erik and Kate.

"Saga."

As in "Saganash."

I think something's happened to Erik and Kate.

Something serious.

I'm calling the police.

(imitating buzzer) Wrong answer.

Huh?

Because they'll call child services,

who will put us in a new foster home.

There is no foster family that will take all of us.

Which means that...

They'll split us up. No!

Or worse, send us to Blackfriar's orphanage,

AKA the house of gruel.

(Tess) Nobody's splitting us up.

We all came from different places.

We may not look alike

or have the same blood, but we're family.

Family stays together, am I right?

Definitely! Right. Sure!

So... what do we do?

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