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1
00:00:00,728 --> 00:00:02,428
Previously on"Hot in Cleveland"...
2
00:00:02,463 --> 00:00:03,724
What the hell
is all this stuff?
3
00:00:04,675 --> 00:00:07,670
You had to date
a cop, didn't you?
4
00:00:09,835 --> 00:00:12,702
I'm in frickin' jail!
5
00:00:12,737 --> 00:00:14,068
Elka, I'm gonna be blunt.
6
00:00:14,102 --> 00:00:15,969
The State has a very
solid case against you.
7
00:00:16,003 --> 00:00:18,171
So you want me to
pretend to be senile?
8
00:00:18,206 --> 00:00:20,450
This is a hearing to
determine if the defendant
9
00:00:20,485 --> 00:00:22,152
is competent to stand trial.
10
00:00:22,186 --> 00:00:23,924
For the defense, we have
11
00:00:23,959 --> 00:00:27,064
the very capable Kirk Stark.
12
00:00:27,098 --> 00:00:29,402
Good afternoon, Counselor.
Good afternoon, Judge.
13
00:00:29,436 --> 00:00:33,040
It is now.
14
00:00:33,075 --> 00:00:36,643
If I get an all-female jury,
I've got it made.
15
00:00:36,678 --> 00:00:38,011
All: [Laughing]
16
00:00:39,287 --> 00:00:41,223
In a Situation Comedythere are two separate,
17
00:00:41,258 --> 00:00:43,359
but equallyimportant stories.
18
00:00:43,393 --> 00:00:44,963
The "A" story, which is about
19
00:00:44,997 --> 00:00:46,597
the comic adventuresof characters.
20
00:00:46,631 --> 00:00:51,902
And the "B" story, which is thesame thing, but shorter.
21
00:00:51,936 --> 00:00:53,737
These arethose stories.
22
00:01:00,742 --> 00:01:02,343
Elka, how you doing?
You nervous?
23
00:01:02,378 --> 00:01:05,883
I'm too screwed
to be nervous.
24
00:01:05,918 --> 00:01:08,086
Oh, now, come on.
25
00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:09,255
Let's just be positive.
26
00:01:09,289 --> 00:01:10,490
How?
27
00:01:10,525 --> 00:01:13,227
They caught me red-handed
with stolen mafia loot.
28
00:01:13,262 --> 00:01:14,396
True.
29
00:01:14,430 --> 00:01:17,299
But your lawyer is
irresistible to women,
30
00:01:17,334 --> 00:01:20,237
and we have six female jurors.
31
00:01:20,271 --> 00:01:21,338
[Slams down gavel]
32
00:01:21,372 --> 00:01:22,706
Okay, people.
33
00:01:22,740 --> 00:01:24,707
We continue with
case number 10421.
34
00:01:24,742 --> 00:01:26,943
The People vs.Elka Ostrovsky.
35
00:01:26,977 --> 00:01:30,480
And we know Judge Lesser
has the hots for your lawyer.
36
00:01:30,514 --> 00:01:33,483
Everybody have
a good weekend?
37
00:01:33,517 --> 00:01:36,385
Kirk?
38
00:01:36,419 --> 00:01:38,054
[Gasping]
39
00:01:38,088 --> 00:01:39,389
Oh, no.
40
00:01:39,423 --> 00:01:43,661
What did you do to
that beautiful face?
41
00:01:43,696 --> 00:01:49,069
I told him, softball
is an ugly man's sport.
42
00:01:49,103 --> 00:01:51,738
- I was expecting a bunt.
- What's wrong with you?
43
00:01:51,772 --> 00:01:55,777
Nobody bunts in softball.
44
00:01:55,811 --> 00:01:58,113
- This happened yesterday?
- That's right.
45
00:01:58,148 --> 00:02:00,750
I thought you said you were
going to your mother's house.
46
00:02:03,622 --> 00:02:05,423
I mean, as so
many men do...
47
00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:06,725
After church...
48
00:02:06,759 --> 00:02:10,696
On Sundays.
49
00:02:10,730 --> 00:02:12,598
May I see you in Chambers?
50
00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:13,633
Cynthia?
51
00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,235
It's "Your Honor".
52
00:02:15,269 --> 00:02:18,105
And no, you may not.
53
00:02:18,139 --> 00:02:20,440
I'm gonna need a minute
to process all this.
54
00:02:20,475 --> 00:02:23,643
So sit your lying,
hideous face down!
55
00:02:28,510 --> 00:02:35,510
Sync by dr.jackson | Corr. by Alice
for www.addic7ed.com
56
00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:39,360
- It's all over.
- No, maybe not.
57
00:02:39,394 --> 00:02:42,330
Check out juror number eight.
58
00:02:45,735 --> 00:02:47,303
Oh, sure.
The nerd.
59
00:02:47,337 --> 00:02:50,139
Haven't you seen him
looking at you?
60
00:02:50,174 --> 00:02:52,509
I have had the feeling
that someone was
61
00:02:52,543 --> 00:02:54,878
mentally undressing me.
62
00:02:54,912 --> 00:02:59,516
But for me that's not unusual.
63
00:02:59,550 --> 00:03:01,752
Well, trust me.
It's him.
64
00:03:01,786 --> 00:03:04,121
So all you have to do is flirt,
65
00:03:04,155 --> 00:03:05,489
and maybe he'll
feel sorry for you
66
00:03:05,523 --> 00:03:07,992
and vote to acquit.
67
00:03:08,026 --> 00:03:10,260
It works with
speeding tickets.
68
00:03:10,295 --> 00:03:11,428
Really?
69
00:03:11,463 --> 00:03:13,797
You know, I've never
been pulled over.
70
00:03:13,832 --> 00:03:16,467
Because girls like you
don't speed, dear.
71
00:03:16,501 --> 00:03:20,405
But girls like me don't
know anything else.
72
00:03:20,439 --> 00:03:25,678
Well, all you have to do
is turn one juror.
73
00:03:25,712 --> 00:03:29,182
Done, and done.
74
00:03:29,216 --> 00:03:32,686
Butterscotch,
do your stuff.
75
00:03:42,499 --> 00:03:43,599
All right.
76
00:03:43,634 --> 00:03:45,968
I've moved on.
77
00:03:46,003 --> 00:03:47,303
But I am in no mood to play,
78
00:03:47,338 --> 00:03:49,105
so nobody better
waste my time.
79
00:03:49,140 --> 00:03:52,276
The case of
People vs. Elka Ostrovsky
80
00:03:52,310 --> 00:03:54,312
is now in session.
81
00:04:13,101 --> 00:04:14,335
There.
82
00:04:14,369 --> 00:04:16,070
What do you think?
83
00:04:16,104 --> 00:04:18,172
You are amazing.
84
00:04:18,206 --> 00:04:20,740
I know you're talking
to your reflection.
85
00:04:20,775 --> 00:04:21,875
But I'll take the compliment.
86
00:04:21,909 --> 00:04:24,177
Now, where are
my smart glasses?
87
00:04:24,211 --> 00:04:26,145
- The ones without the lenses?
- Yes.
88
00:04:26,180 --> 00:04:27,980
Getting an interview
with the Governor's wife
89
00:04:28,015 --> 00:04:29,148
was quite a coup for me.
90
00:04:29,183 --> 00:04:30,716
And I want to look like
a serious journalist.
91
00:04:30,751 --> 00:04:33,019
Well, I don't think she's
gonna be that challenging.
92
00:04:33,053 --> 00:04:36,155
She seems a little
blonde to me.
93
00:04:36,189 --> 00:04:37,290
Yeah, I see what you mean.
94
00:04:37,324 --> 00:04:41,528
Highlights on,
but nobody's home.
95
00:04:41,562 --> 00:04:43,530
I'm gonna see if I can
get any news about Elka's trial.
96
00:04:43,564 --> 00:04:44,898
Hmm.
97
00:04:44,932 --> 00:04:47,000
Ah, Victoria Chase.
98
00:04:47,035 --> 00:04:49,303
- Heather Shaw.
- Oh, it's so nice to meet you.
99
00:04:49,338 --> 00:04:50,805
I'm a big fan
of your husband's.
100
00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:52,807
And you make such
a handsome couple.
101
00:04:52,842 --> 00:04:53,909
Okay, look Vicky.
102
00:04:53,943 --> 00:04:55,477
We can do this two ways.
103
00:04:55,511 --> 00:04:57,046
We can keep up
the goo-ga-ga,
104
00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:58,713
and coast like merry idiots,
105
00:04:58,748 --> 00:05:00,281
or we can grow a pair
and admit it.
106
00:05:00,316 --> 00:05:01,750
We're both in this
to manipulate
107
00:05:01,784 --> 00:05:04,218
the poor saps
we call, "the people."
108
00:05:04,253 --> 00:05:06,987
Go on.
109
00:05:07,021 --> 00:05:08,421
America might not know
110
00:05:08,456 --> 00:05:10,657
about the First Family
of Ohio now.
111
00:05:10,691 --> 00:05:12,525
But if I got anything
to do with it, they will.
112
00:05:12,559 --> 00:05:13,526
Wow.
113
00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:15,728
You just wanna be famous.
114
00:05:15,762 --> 00:05:19,999
Dear God, I finally
understand politics.
115
00:05:20,033 --> 00:05:21,467
Well, we've got
a long ways to go.
116
00:05:21,502 --> 00:05:23,836
Right now, we're completely
unknown outside Ohio.
117
00:05:23,871 --> 00:05:25,171
Even right next door to that
118
00:05:25,206 --> 00:05:28,074
bleeding abscess
people call Indiana.
119
00:05:28,109 --> 00:05:30,043
But while Charles
is only Governor now...
120
00:05:30,078 --> 00:05:31,779
Who knows where
he could end up.
121
00:05:31,813 --> 00:05:33,381
If you play his cards right.
122
00:05:33,415 --> 00:05:34,749
I mean, look at Sarah Palin.
123
00:05:34,783 --> 00:05:36,518
Now that woman
knows marketing.
124
00:05:36,552 --> 00:05:38,987
Fat chance getting my nitwit
of a teenage daughter on.
125
00:05:39,021 --> 00:05:41,556
Dancing with the Stars.
126
00:05:41,590 --> 00:05:43,791
Well, maybe if
she gets pregnant.
127
00:05:43,826 --> 00:05:46,228
Mm, knock wood.
128
00:05:46,262 --> 00:05:50,132
You know, I am not without
ambition in my field, either.
129
00:05:50,166 --> 00:05:51,600
Just yesterday,
someone told me
130
00:05:51,634 --> 00:05:53,936
that I had the legs
for Fox News.
131
00:05:53,970 --> 00:05:55,204
Well that's one of
the highest compliments
132
00:05:55,238 --> 00:05:57,540
you can get in journalism.
133
00:05:57,574 --> 00:05:58,807
Thank you.
134
00:05:58,842 --> 00:06:01,043
So let's use each other
to get to the top.
135
00:06:01,077 --> 00:06:03,812
In Hollywood,
we call that friendship.
136
00:06:03,847 --> 00:06:07,783
So we are campaigning
against illiteracy, right?
137
00:06:07,817 --> 00:06:09,285
Or childhood obesity.
138
00:06:09,319 --> 00:06:11,053
I'm waiting to see
which one polls better.
139
00:06:11,087 --> 00:06:12,521
In fact, I'm waiting for
the numbers to get in.
140
00:06:12,556 --> 00:06:13,655
Let me see what's going on.
141
00:06:13,690 --> 00:06:17,259
What's going on?
142
00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:19,628
I just got a bunch
of texts from Mel.
143
00:06:19,663 --> 00:06:21,097
"Elka's about to
take the stand."
144
00:06:21,131 --> 00:06:22,999
"I'm not supposed
to text in court."
145
00:06:23,033 --> 00:06:26,369
"Here comes the bailiff,
he's taking my cell ph..."
146
00:06:26,404 --> 00:06:27,637
That's the end of
the transmission.
147
00:06:27,672 --> 00:06:28,638
Oh, damn.
148
00:06:28,673 --> 00:06:29,940
Well, this story better be good
149
00:06:29,974 --> 00:06:32,275
if it's making us
miss all of that.
150
00:06:32,310 --> 00:06:33,610
The poll is in.
151
00:06:33,644 --> 00:06:35,912
It's childhood obesity
over illiteracy.
152
00:06:35,947 --> 00:06:38,715
They probably couldn't
read the poll question.
153
00:06:38,749 --> 00:06:41,719
Tell the dumb kid to go home
and send in the fatty.
154
00:06:41,753 --> 00:06:43,587
Hey, I know you.
155
00:06:43,621 --> 00:06:45,589
You're Joy Scroggs,
the eyebrow queen.
156
00:06:45,624 --> 00:06:47,357
You did Oprah's arch.
157
00:06:47,392 --> 00:06:48,992
I'm not at liberty to say,
but trust me,
158
00:06:49,027 --> 00:06:50,061
if I were at liberty to say,
159
00:06:50,095 --> 00:06:51,228
my answer would
certainly not be,
160
00:06:51,263 --> 00:06:52,930
"I'm not at
liberty to say."
161
00:06:52,965 --> 00:06:55,733
I like the way you evade.
It's nice, it's sexy.
162
00:06:55,768 --> 00:06:57,735
Would you be willing
to do my husband's brows?
163
00:06:57,770 --> 00:07:00,171
Or should I say brow?
164
00:07:00,205 --> 00:07:01,472
- Oh, tragedy.
- Mm-Hmm.
165
00:07:01,507 --> 00:07:04,041
Walking hair ball.
166
00:07:04,076 --> 00:07:06,044
- Well, it's very manly.
- Mm-Hmm.
167
00:07:06,078 --> 00:07:07,512
Oh, let's not sugarcoat it.
168
00:07:07,546 --> 00:07:09,514
We're not getting
within 50 miles of D.C.
169
00:07:09,549 --> 00:07:13,318
With these dandruff-catchers
on his forehead.
170
00:07:13,352 --> 00:07:15,720
So if you'd be willing
to trim back these hedges
171
00:07:15,755 --> 00:07:18,423
you can name your price.
172
00:07:18,457 --> 00:07:19,557
Well, actually,
instead of money
173
00:07:19,591 --> 00:07:20,892
I could use some help.
174
00:07:20,926 --> 00:07:22,627
You see, I'm having some
green card problems
175
00:07:22,661 --> 00:07:23,728
and your influence...
176
00:07:23,762 --> 00:07:25,663
Hey, buddy,
look at you!
177
00:07:25,697 --> 00:07:27,364
[Giggling]
178
00:07:27,399 --> 00:07:28,933
You call this obese?
179
00:07:28,968 --> 00:07:30,935
This is husky at best.
180
00:07:30,969 --> 00:07:33,470
Now you go find me a
fatter kid or a smaller shirt.
181
00:07:33,505 --> 00:07:34,872
Now.
182
00:07:34,906 --> 00:07:37,741
Have you seen the buffet table?
183
00:07:43,514 --> 00:07:45,215
Please state your name.
184
00:07:45,249 --> 00:07:47,016
Elka Ostrovsky.
185
00:07:47,051 --> 00:07:49,652
I'm single.
186
00:07:49,686 --> 00:07:53,521
Very single.
187
00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:55,423
A capricorn.
188
00:07:55,457 --> 00:07:58,860
And I love nights
curled up with a book,
189
00:07:58,894 --> 00:08:03,197
and a special someone.
190
00:08:08,236 --> 00:08:10,871
Actually, it was my
late husband's wishes
191
00:08:10,905 --> 00:08:13,707
that the stolen
items remain hidden.
192
00:08:13,741 --> 00:08:19,280
I'm powerless in the
presence of a real man.
193
00:08:21,383 --> 00:08:25,621
I used to be, too.
194
00:08:25,656 --> 00:08:28,024
Mrs. Ostrovsky,
you continued to honor
195
00:08:28,058 --> 00:08:30,193
your late husband's wishes
after his passing?
196
00:08:30,227 --> 00:08:32,195
Oh, yes.
197
00:08:32,230 --> 00:08:34,932
Those were not easy years.
198
00:08:34,966 --> 00:08:38,602
So, so alone.
199
00:08:38,637 --> 00:08:42,006
So in need of comfort.
200
00:08:44,409 --> 00:08:47,945
Juror number eight,
are you okay?
201
00:08:49,914 --> 00:08:52,182
You seem to be breathing heavy.
202
00:08:52,217 --> 00:08:55,319
It's creepy and distracting.
203
00:08:55,354 --> 00:08:58,322
Doing fine, your honor.
204
00:08:58,356 --> 00:09:00,390
Just fine.
205
00:09:00,425 --> 00:09:04,328
And the witness may continue...
206
00:09:04,363 --> 00:09:06,531
As long as she likes.
207
00:09:16,286 --> 00:09:17,353
Wow, it sounds like the
208
00:09:17,387 --> 00:09:19,422
prosecution has
a pretty strong case.
209
00:09:19,456 --> 00:09:21,156
Whatever.
210
00:09:21,190 --> 00:09:23,092
- You don't seem very upset.
- Right?
211
00:09:23,126 --> 00:09:25,827
I mean, the case goes
to the jury tomorrow.
212
00:09:25,862 --> 00:09:27,996
She keeps saying she's
got an ace up her sleeve.
213
00:09:28,030 --> 00:09:29,230
Not an ace.
214
00:09:30,264 --> 00:09:31,565
A letter.
215
00:09:32,100 --> 00:09:35,468
From juror number eight.
216
00:09:36,003 --> 00:09:37,938
"Meet me in the
second floor broom closet
217
00:09:37,973 --> 00:09:39,340
"tomorrow before court."
218
00:09:39,374 --> 00:09:42,343
"I'll have my driver
drop me off a little early."
219
00:09:42,377 --> 00:09:43,477
Your driver?
220
00:09:43,512 --> 00:09:45,746
He sounds rich.
221
00:09:45,781 --> 00:09:46,914
On the other hand,
how rich could he be
222
00:09:46,949 --> 00:09:49,684
if he couldn't
get off jury duty?
223
00:09:50,219 --> 00:09:51,386
You're seriously going to go
224
00:09:51,420 --> 00:09:53,055
into a broom closet
with a juror?
225
00:09:53,089 --> 00:09:54,523
Isn't that jury tampering?
226
00:09:54,808 --> 00:09:59,511
It is if you're
doing it right.
227
00:09:59,545 --> 00:10:00,545
Elka!
228
00:10:00,579 --> 00:10:01,646
What?
229
00:10:01,680 --> 00:10:03,848
Flirting with the guy
was your idea.
230
00:10:03,882 --> 00:10:05,983
Yeah, but I meant
just flirting.
231
00:10:06,017 --> 00:10:07,651
And you could
get into trouble.
232
00:10:07,685 --> 00:10:09,519
I say avoid the jury tampering
233
00:10:09,553 --> 00:10:11,388
and just pray for
a light sentence.
234
00:10:11,422 --> 00:10:13,223
I don't need prayer.
235
00:10:13,257 --> 00:10:16,893
I've got my broom closet.
236
00:10:16,927 --> 00:10:18,060
Broom closet?
237
00:10:18,095 --> 00:10:19,195
Both of you standing?
238
00:10:19,230 --> 00:10:23,166
I object.
Morally and logistically.
239
00:10:23,201 --> 00:10:24,968
How far are
you willing to go?
240
00:10:25,002 --> 00:10:29,439
Oh, pretty far.
I'm desperate.
241
00:10:29,473 --> 00:10:33,276
Also, it's been a while.
242
00:10:48,961 --> 00:10:52,063
Justice has been serviced.
243
00:10:55,334 --> 00:10:57,301
I wonder how long
the jury will deliberate.
244
00:10:57,336 --> 00:10:58,770
Doesn't matter to me.
245
00:10:58,804 --> 00:11:01,438
Did you...
246
00:11:01,473 --> 00:11:05,776
I met with a certain juror on
a subject of mutual interest.
247
00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:09,880
All right, I have
important breaking news
248
00:11:09,915 --> 00:11:11,248
and it's not even about me.
249
00:11:11,283 --> 00:11:12,783
Have you heard
something about the trial?
250
00:11:12,817 --> 00:11:14,218
It's about Joy.
251
00:11:14,252 --> 00:11:16,754
You're the Governor's hooker.
What?
252
00:11:16,788 --> 00:11:18,489
Well, there's a
picture of you on his lap,
253
00:11:18,524 --> 00:11:20,992
it's the lead story on
Channel Seven's website.
254
00:11:21,026 --> 00:11:24,429
"Gov in photo scandal
with mystery straddler?"
255
00:11:24,463 --> 00:11:27,098
Well, I had to sit
on top of him for leverage.
256
00:11:27,133 --> 00:11:29,735
I practically needed a
chain saw to thin those brows,
257
00:11:29,769 --> 00:11:32,637
I had to use a
number seven tweezers.
258
00:11:32,672 --> 00:11:36,709
If you were in the business,
you'd know how extreme that was.
259
00:11:36,743 --> 00:11:38,410
God, this is terrible.
What am I gonna do?
260
00:11:38,445 --> 00:11:39,578
No, it's okay.
It's okay.
261
00:11:39,613 --> 00:11:40,846
You can't see your face.
262
00:11:40,881 --> 00:11:42,916
Oh, it's her all right.
Look at the hand.
263
00:11:42,950 --> 00:11:45,986
Oh, yeah.
264
00:11:46,020 --> 00:11:49,289
- What about my hand?
- It looks like a man hand.
265
00:11:49,323 --> 00:11:50,891
No, it doesn't.
266
00:11:50,926 --> 00:11:52,059
It's just the
angle of the picture.
267
00:11:52,094 --> 00:11:53,627
My hand is foreshortened.
268
00:11:53,662 --> 00:11:56,664
Does that mean it
looks like a dude's?
269
00:11:56,698 --> 00:11:57,899
Come on.
Look at her legs.
270
00:11:57,933 --> 00:11:59,801
That's obviously
not a man's leg.
271
00:11:59,835 --> 00:12:02,737
Yes, those belong to
a beautiful, sexy woman.
272
00:12:02,771 --> 00:12:04,005
Thank you.
273
00:12:04,039 --> 00:12:05,873
Who will reveal her steamy
affair with the Governor
274
00:12:05,908 --> 00:12:09,977
on my show,
"Oh, hi, Ohio."
275
00:12:10,012 --> 00:12:11,779
But you know I'm
just plucking his eye brows.
276
00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:12,981
Well, that's not
what it looks like.
277
00:12:13,015 --> 00:12:14,816
Oh, please say that
you're his hooker.
278
00:12:14,850 --> 00:12:17,418
No, then I'll never
get my green card.
279
00:12:17,453 --> 00:12:18,820
I'll go on your show
and tell the truth.
280
00:12:18,854 --> 00:12:20,088
The truth?
281
00:12:20,122 --> 00:12:23,558
Well, my viewers
deserve better than that.
282
00:12:23,592 --> 00:12:25,560
Hasn't the Governor's
office said anything yet?
283
00:12:25,595 --> 00:12:26,895
No, not a word.
284
00:12:26,929 --> 00:12:29,230
So I could own this story
if you'd just play ball.
285
00:12:29,265 --> 00:12:31,999
Like a dude.
286
00:12:32,033 --> 00:12:34,234
No, and that's final.
287
00:12:34,269 --> 00:12:36,537
[Slams down gavel]
288
00:12:36,572 --> 00:12:37,538
Ladies and gentlemen,
289
00:12:37,573 --> 00:12:40,809
the jury has reached a verdict.
290
00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:43,912
What did I say
about looking at me?
291
00:12:43,947 --> 00:12:46,849
That messed up face
is freaking me out.
292
00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:02,027
We the jury find
the defendant, Elka Ostrovsky...
293
00:13:02,426 --> 00:13:05,080
Watch me act surprised.
294
00:13:05,239 --> 00:13:08,016
Guilty.
295
00:13:08,050 --> 00:13:11,286
What?
296
00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:14,155
Defendant will remain
free on bail until sentencing.
297
00:13:14,190 --> 00:13:16,524
And defense counsel
will be responsible
298
00:13:16,559 --> 00:13:19,928
for all ancillary court costs,
including, but not limited,
299
00:13:19,963 --> 00:13:22,965
to the $800 the court
spent on this damn weave.
300
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,768
[Slams down gavel]
301
00:13:28,206 --> 00:13:29,306
Now don't panic.
302
00:13:29,341 --> 00:13:30,741
The judge still has
a lot of discretion
303
00:13:30,776 --> 00:13:32,310
when it comes to sentencing.
304
00:13:32,344 --> 00:13:33,711
Now if you'll all
testify on her behalf,
305
00:13:33,746 --> 00:13:35,146
and I'll turn on the charm.
306
00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:38,850
Is it possible your face has
gotten even less attractive?
307
00:13:38,885 --> 00:13:40,418
It has?
308
00:13:40,453 --> 00:13:42,087
Oh, damn.
309
00:13:42,121 --> 00:13:45,123
I think I'm having an
allergic reaction to the salve.
310
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:47,292
Are you... crying?
311
00:13:47,326 --> 00:13:49,261
Some of it is
my stitches weeping.
312
00:13:49,295 --> 00:13:50,462
But...
313
00:13:50,496 --> 00:13:52,264
Yeah, I am a little upset.
314
00:13:52,298 --> 00:13:54,232
Women are being so mean to me.
315
00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:55,567
Nobody's opening a door,
316
00:13:55,601 --> 00:13:57,002
or holding an elevator.
317
00:13:57,036 --> 00:14:01,073
I had to tear open my own
sugar packet at Starbuck's!
318
00:14:01,107 --> 00:14:03,776
I need a moment.
319
00:14:03,810 --> 00:14:05,044
What went wrong?
320
00:14:05,078 --> 00:14:07,313
I thought you tampered
with juror number eight.
321
00:14:07,348 --> 00:14:09,749
I tampered the
heck out of him.
322
00:14:09,784 --> 00:14:12,719
Oh, there he is now.
Let's go get him.
323
00:14:12,754 --> 00:14:14,888
- You!
- I thought you liked her.
324
00:14:14,923 --> 00:14:17,157
Who?
325
00:14:17,191 --> 00:14:19,993
Hello.
326
00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,595
Sorry, he's having
a little episode.
327
00:14:21,629 --> 00:14:23,396
It happens from time to time.
328
00:14:23,431 --> 00:14:24,931
What do you mean,
"an episode?"
329
00:14:24,966 --> 00:14:26,366
He suffers from
a condition called
330
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:28,601
"Transient
Global Amnesia."
331
00:14:28,635 --> 00:14:30,002
If he gets over-stimulated,
332
00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:32,471
he loses his
short-term memory for a while.
333
00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:33,572
Something must have gotten him
334
00:14:33,606 --> 00:14:38,344
excited this morning
and triggered it.
335
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,712
He forgot everything?
336
00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:44,017
Everything that happened
between breakfast and lunch.
337
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,554
You poor bow-tied
son-of-a-gun.
338
00:14:46,588 --> 00:14:51,426
You don't even know
what you had.
339
00:15:05,927 --> 00:15:07,927
- You couldn't sleep either?
- Mm-mm.
340
00:15:07,962 --> 00:15:09,362
I'm still trying to figure out
341
00:15:09,396 --> 00:15:10,496
what I'm gonna say at
Elka's sentencing hearing.
342
00:15:10,530 --> 00:15:11,664
I'm so scared for her.
343
00:15:11,698 --> 00:15:13,599
Yeah, me too.
344
00:15:13,633 --> 00:15:15,067
It's so hard to believe that
345
00:15:15,101 --> 00:15:17,603
they could actually
send her to jail.
346
00:15:17,637 --> 00:15:18,670
I know.
347
00:15:18,705 --> 00:15:20,239
Prison.
348
00:15:20,273 --> 00:15:22,307
It's horrible.
349
00:15:22,342 --> 00:15:25,543
Well, not always.
350
00:15:25,578 --> 00:15:27,712
On Edge of Tomorrow,
when Honor St. Raven
351
00:15:27,746 --> 00:15:30,015
went in for
double murder,
352
00:15:30,049 --> 00:15:31,683
she was released
after six weeks
353
00:15:31,717 --> 00:15:34,252
for saving the warden's children
from an axe murderess.
354
00:15:34,286 --> 00:15:35,487
And not only that,
355
00:15:35,521 --> 00:15:37,855
she earned a degree
in Advanced Bionics
356
00:15:37,889 --> 00:15:40,591
from the Yale University
of Correspondence.
357
00:15:40,625 --> 00:15:45,094
So sometimes prison is
just what you make of it.
358
00:15:45,129 --> 00:15:47,597
Elka's gonna be there
more than six weeks.
359
00:15:47,631 --> 00:15:50,433
Ah, well then she
can get two degrees.
360
00:15:50,467 --> 00:15:51,434
Sorry.
361
00:15:51,468 --> 00:15:53,669
I joke when I'm scared.
362
00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:55,704
I guess I figure that
if I act as if
363
00:15:55,739 --> 00:15:58,241
it isn't serious,
maybe it won't be.
364
00:15:58,275 --> 00:16:00,010
Unfortunately, it is.
365
00:16:00,044 --> 00:16:01,912
Oh.
You too, huh?
366
00:16:01,946 --> 00:16:06,517
I keep picturing Elka
alone in a cold, dark cell.
367
00:16:06,552 --> 00:16:10,755
But that image has lost
its happy glow for me.
368
00:16:10,790 --> 00:16:12,124
You know, if
none of us can sleep
369
00:16:12,158 --> 00:16:13,892
I bet Elka's still up.
370
00:16:13,927 --> 00:16:15,227
Her light's still on.
371
00:16:15,262 --> 00:16:18,464
She's probably going
crazy with anxiety.
372
00:16:18,498 --> 00:16:21,133
Pour her a cup of tea,
I'll go get her.
373
00:16:21,168 --> 00:16:22,635
God, what a day.
374
00:16:22,669 --> 00:16:23,836
Elka getting convicted,
375
00:16:23,870 --> 00:16:27,640
and you literally
man-handling the Governor.
376
00:16:27,674 --> 00:16:30,409
God, I could use that as
a lead-in to my story.
377
00:16:30,444 --> 00:16:33,279
There is no story.
378
00:16:33,313 --> 00:16:34,847
I just wish I could get
the Governor's office
379
00:16:34,881 --> 00:16:36,215
to return my phone calls
380
00:16:36,249 --> 00:16:38,684
before someone ID's me
and I get deported.
381
00:16:38,718 --> 00:16:40,486
Now, see, this is why
you have to strike first.
382
00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:41,887
Now let me get your story out.
383
00:16:41,922 --> 00:16:43,122
Tell the world about
384
00:16:43,157 --> 00:16:46,393
the Governor's
"sex for amnesty" scheme.
385
00:16:46,427 --> 00:16:49,396
There was no
"sex for amnesty" scheme.
386
00:16:49,430 --> 00:16:52,934
Mostly because I didn't
think of it fast enough.
387
00:16:52,968 --> 00:16:55,436
Why can't I just say
I was plucking his brows?
388
00:16:55,471 --> 00:16:56,704
Well, why say
that when I can
389
00:16:56,739 --> 00:16:58,540
turn you into
something much better.
390
00:16:58,574 --> 00:17:00,175
A celebrity victim.
391
00:17:00,209 --> 00:17:02,110
Now say what you will
about our country,
392
00:17:02,144 --> 00:17:04,346
but we do not
deport our celebrities.
393
00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:09,017
No, at worst, we exile
them to reality shows.
394
00:17:09,052 --> 00:17:11,019
She's gone.
395
00:17:11,053 --> 00:17:12,187
Elka's gone.
396
00:17:12,221 --> 00:17:13,988
Well, where did she go?
397
00:17:14,023 --> 00:17:15,723
I don't know, but she's
gone and she left a note.
398
00:17:15,758 --> 00:17:16,858
What's it say?
399
00:17:16,892 --> 00:17:19,027
"I'm gone."
400
00:17:19,061 --> 00:17:20,294
That's it?
401
00:17:20,329 --> 00:17:23,298
"P. S. Sorry to go without
saying good-bye,
402
00:17:23,332 --> 00:17:24,933
"but when I realized
my sentence depended on
403
00:17:24,967 --> 00:17:28,203
"whatever half-baked testimony
you three bird-brains cooked up,
404
00:17:28,237 --> 00:17:32,006
"I decided to take my chances
and light out for the territory."
405
00:17:32,041 --> 00:17:34,209
What's that?
"Light out for the territory?"
406
00:17:34,243 --> 00:17:36,445
It means she went West.
407
00:17:36,479 --> 00:17:38,580
"P.P.S. There's more
Internet pictures"
408
00:17:38,614 --> 00:17:41,349
of the Governor getting off
with Lady French Fry.
409
00:17:41,384 --> 00:17:43,685
Oh, my God, no.
410
00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:44,853
Lady French Fry.
411
00:17:44,887 --> 00:17:46,388
That's a new one.
412
00:17:46,422 --> 00:17:49,058
"P.P.P.S. Joy,
I may not see you again,
413
00:17:49,092 --> 00:17:52,228
and I've been sitting on
"Lady French Fry" for a week.
414
00:17:52,263 --> 00:17:53,463
I had to get it off my chest.
415
00:17:53,497 --> 00:17:58,634
If you had a chest,
you'd know what I mean.
416
00:17:58,669 --> 00:18:00,903
She loved to
insult my chest.
417
00:18:00,938 --> 00:18:02,138
And my hair.
418
00:18:02,172 --> 00:18:05,174
And my inability
to hold on to a man.
419
00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:07,143
And my intelligence.
420
00:18:07,177 --> 00:18:09,645
And my morals.
421
00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,682
She's like a mother to me.
422
00:18:12,716 --> 00:18:16,218
You don't think she's
actually gone West, do you?
423
00:18:16,253 --> 00:18:18,321
What state is West of Ohio?
424
00:18:18,355 --> 00:18:23,561
I wanna say Maryland.
425
00:18:23,595 --> 00:18:24,796
Well, she's
out there somewhere,
426
00:18:24,830 --> 00:18:27,232
and we have to find her
before the police do.
427
00:18:27,266 --> 00:18:30,102
Where would she go to hide out?
428
00:18:35,776 --> 00:18:38,977
If you're back here,
who's driving the wagon?
429
00:18:39,012 --> 00:18:40,546
The horse, naturally.
430
00:18:40,580 --> 00:18:42,548
Relax thyself.
431
00:18:42,582 --> 00:18:45,117
She knows the way.
432
00:18:45,151 --> 00:18:47,119
So where we're going,
433
00:18:47,153 --> 00:18:50,589
I'm completely cut off
from the outside world?
434
00:18:50,623 --> 00:18:53,558
Indeed.
435
00:18:53,592 --> 00:18:55,360
Works for me.
436
00:18:55,394 --> 00:19:00,430
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for www.addic7ed.com
437
00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:05,030
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