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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,728 --> 00:00:02,428 Previously on "Hot in Cleveland"... 2 00:00:02,463 --> 00:00:03,724 What the hell is all this stuff? 3 00:00:04,675 --> 00:00:07,670 You had to date a cop, didn't you? 4 00:00:09,835 --> 00:00:12,702 I'm in frickin' jail! 5 00:00:12,737 --> 00:00:14,068 Elka, I'm gonna be blunt. 6 00:00:14,102 --> 00:00:15,969 The State has a very solid case against you. 7 00:00:16,003 --> 00:00:18,171 So you want me to pretend to be senile? 8 00:00:18,206 --> 00:00:20,450 This is a hearing to determine if the defendant 9 00:00:20,485 --> 00:00:22,152 is competent to stand trial. 10 00:00:22,186 --> 00:00:23,924 For the defense, we have 11 00:00:23,959 --> 00:00:27,064 the very capable Kirk Stark. 12 00:00:27,098 --> 00:00:29,402 Good afternoon, Counselor. Good afternoon, Judge. 13 00:00:29,436 --> 00:00:33,040 It is now. 14 00:00:33,075 --> 00:00:36,643 If I get an all-female jury, I've got it made. 15 00:00:36,678 --> 00:00:38,011 All: [Laughing] 16 00:00:39,287 --> 00:00:41,223 In a Situation Comedy there are two separate, 17 00:00:41,258 --> 00:00:43,359 but equally important stories. 18 00:00:43,393 --> 00:00:44,963 The "A" story, which is about 19 00:00:44,997 --> 00:00:46,597 the comic adventures of characters. 20 00:00:46,631 --> 00:00:51,902 And the "B" story, which is the same thing, but shorter. 21 00:00:51,936 --> 00:00:53,737 These are those stories. 22 00:01:00,742 --> 00:01:02,343 Elka, how you doing? You nervous? 23 00:01:02,378 --> 00:01:05,883 I'm too screwed to be nervous. 24 00:01:05,918 --> 00:01:08,086 Oh, now, come on. 25 00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:09,255 Let's just be positive. 26 00:01:09,289 --> 00:01:10,490 How? 27 00:01:10,525 --> 00:01:13,227 They caught me red-handed with stolen mafia loot. 28 00:01:13,262 --> 00:01:14,396 True. 29 00:01:14,430 --> 00:01:17,299 But your lawyer is irresistible to women, 30 00:01:17,334 --> 00:01:20,237 and we have six female jurors. 31 00:01:20,271 --> 00:01:21,338 [Slams down gavel] 32 00:01:21,372 --> 00:01:22,706 Okay, people. 33 00:01:22,740 --> 00:01:24,707 We continue with case number 10421. 34 00:01:24,742 --> 00:01:26,943 The People vs. Elka Ostrovsky. 35 00:01:26,977 --> 00:01:30,480 And we know Judge Lesser has the hots for your lawyer. 36 00:01:30,514 --> 00:01:33,483 Everybody have a good weekend? 37 00:01:33,517 --> 00:01:36,385 Kirk? 38 00:01:36,419 --> 00:01:38,054 [Gasping] 39 00:01:38,088 --> 00:01:39,389 Oh, no. 40 00:01:39,423 --> 00:01:43,661 What did you do to that beautiful face? 41 00:01:43,696 --> 00:01:49,069 I told him, softball is an ugly man's sport. 42 00:01:49,103 --> 00:01:51,738 - I was expecting a bunt. - What's wrong with you? 43 00:01:51,772 --> 00:01:55,777 Nobody bunts in softball. 44 00:01:55,811 --> 00:01:58,113 - This happened yesterday? - That's right. 45 00:01:58,148 --> 00:02:00,750 I thought you said you were going to your mother's house. 46 00:02:03,622 --> 00:02:05,423 I mean, as so many men do... 47 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:06,725 After church... 48 00:02:06,759 --> 00:02:10,696 On Sundays. 49 00:02:10,730 --> 00:02:12,598 May I see you in Chambers? 50 00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:13,633 Cynthia? 51 00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,235 It's "Your Honor". 52 00:02:15,269 --> 00:02:18,105 And no, you may not. 53 00:02:18,139 --> 00:02:20,440 I'm gonna need a minute to process all this. 54 00:02:20,475 --> 00:02:23,643 So sit your lying, hideous face down! 55 00:02:28,510 --> 00:02:35,510 Sync by dr.jackson | Corr. by Alice for www.addic7ed.com 56 00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:39,360 - It's all over. - No, maybe not. 57 00:02:39,394 --> 00:02:42,330 Check out juror number eight. 58 00:02:45,735 --> 00:02:47,303 Oh, sure. The nerd. 59 00:02:47,337 --> 00:02:50,139 Haven't you seen him looking at you? 60 00:02:50,174 --> 00:02:52,509 I have had the feeling that someone was 61 00:02:52,543 --> 00:02:54,878 mentally undressing me. 62 00:02:54,912 --> 00:02:59,516 But for me that's not unusual. 63 00:02:59,550 --> 00:03:01,752 Well, trust me. It's him. 64 00:03:01,786 --> 00:03:04,121 So all you have to do is flirt, 65 00:03:04,155 --> 00:03:05,489 and maybe he'll feel sorry for you 66 00:03:05,523 --> 00:03:07,992 and vote to acquit. 67 00:03:08,026 --> 00:03:10,260 It works with speeding tickets. 68 00:03:10,295 --> 00:03:11,428 Really? 69 00:03:11,463 --> 00:03:13,797 You know, I've never been pulled over. 70 00:03:13,832 --> 00:03:16,467 Because girls like you don't speed, dear. 71 00:03:16,501 --> 00:03:20,405 But girls like me don't know anything else. 72 00:03:20,439 --> 00:03:25,678 Well, all you have to do is turn one juror. 73 00:03:25,712 --> 00:03:29,182 Done, and done. 74 00:03:29,216 --> 00:03:32,686 Butterscotch, do your stuff. 75 00:03:42,499 --> 00:03:43,599 All right. 76 00:03:43,634 --> 00:03:45,968 I've moved on. 77 00:03:46,003 --> 00:03:47,303 But I am in no mood to play, 78 00:03:47,338 --> 00:03:49,105 so nobody better waste my time. 79 00:03:49,140 --> 00:03:52,276 The case of People vs. Elka Ostrovsky 80 00:03:52,310 --> 00:03:54,312 is now in session. 81 00:04:13,101 --> 00:04:14,335 There. 82 00:04:14,369 --> 00:04:16,070 What do you think? 83 00:04:16,104 --> 00:04:18,172 You are amazing. 84 00:04:18,206 --> 00:04:20,740 I know you're talking to your reflection. 85 00:04:20,775 --> 00:04:21,875 But I'll take the compliment. 86 00:04:21,909 --> 00:04:24,177 Now, where are my smart glasses? 87 00:04:24,211 --> 00:04:26,145 - The ones without the lenses? - Yes. 88 00:04:26,180 --> 00:04:27,980 Getting an interview with the Governor's wife 89 00:04:28,015 --> 00:04:29,148 was quite a coup for me. 90 00:04:29,183 --> 00:04:30,716 And I want to look like a serious journalist. 91 00:04:30,751 --> 00:04:33,019 Well, I don't think she's gonna be that challenging. 92 00:04:33,053 --> 00:04:36,155 She seems a little blonde to me. 93 00:04:36,189 --> 00:04:37,290 Yeah, I see what you mean. 94 00:04:37,324 --> 00:04:41,528 Highlights on, but nobody's home. 95 00:04:41,562 --> 00:04:43,530 I'm gonna see if I can get any news about Elka's trial. 96 00:04:43,564 --> 00:04:44,898 Hmm. 97 00:04:44,932 --> 00:04:47,000 Ah, Victoria Chase. 98 00:04:47,035 --> 00:04:49,303 - Heather Shaw. - Oh, it's so nice to meet you. 99 00:04:49,338 --> 00:04:50,805 I'm a big fan of your husband's. 100 00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:52,807 And you make such a handsome couple. 101 00:04:52,842 --> 00:04:53,909 Okay, look Vicky. 102 00:04:53,943 --> 00:04:55,477 We can do this two ways. 103 00:04:55,511 --> 00:04:57,046 We can keep up the goo-ga-ga, 104 00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:58,713 and coast like merry idiots, 105 00:04:58,748 --> 00:05:00,281 or we can grow a pair and admit it. 106 00:05:00,316 --> 00:05:01,750 We're both in this to manipulate 107 00:05:01,784 --> 00:05:04,218 the poor saps we call, "the people." 108 00:05:04,253 --> 00:05:06,987 Go on. 109 00:05:07,021 --> 00:05:08,421 America might not know 110 00:05:08,456 --> 00:05:10,657 about the First Family of Ohio now. 111 00:05:10,691 --> 00:05:12,525 But if I got anything to do with it, they will. 112 00:05:12,559 --> 00:05:13,526 Wow. 113 00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:15,728 You just wanna be famous. 114 00:05:15,762 --> 00:05:19,999 Dear God, I finally understand politics. 115 00:05:20,033 --> 00:05:21,467 Well, we've got a long ways to go. 116 00:05:21,502 --> 00:05:23,836 Right now, we're completely unknown outside Ohio. 117 00:05:23,871 --> 00:05:25,171 Even right next door to that 118 00:05:25,206 --> 00:05:28,074 bleeding abscess people call Indiana. 119 00:05:28,109 --> 00:05:30,043 But while Charles is only Governor now... 120 00:05:30,078 --> 00:05:31,779 Who knows where he could end up. 121 00:05:31,813 --> 00:05:33,381 If you play his cards right. 122 00:05:33,415 --> 00:05:34,749 I mean, look at Sarah Palin. 123 00:05:34,783 --> 00:05:36,518 Now that woman knows marketing. 124 00:05:36,552 --> 00:05:38,987 Fat chance getting my nitwit of a teenage daughter on. 125 00:05:39,021 --> 00:05:41,556 Dancing with the Stars. 126 00:05:41,590 --> 00:05:43,791 Well, maybe if she gets pregnant. 127 00:05:43,826 --> 00:05:46,228 Mm, knock wood. 128 00:05:46,262 --> 00:05:50,132 You know, I am not without ambition in my field, either. 129 00:05:50,166 --> 00:05:51,600 Just yesterday, someone told me 130 00:05:51,634 --> 00:05:53,936 that I had the legs for Fox News. 131 00:05:53,970 --> 00:05:55,204 Well that's one of the highest compliments 132 00:05:55,238 --> 00:05:57,540 you can get in journalism. 133 00:05:57,574 --> 00:05:58,807 Thank you. 134 00:05:58,842 --> 00:06:01,043 So let's use each other to get to the top. 135 00:06:01,077 --> 00:06:03,812 In Hollywood, we call that friendship. 136 00:06:03,847 --> 00:06:07,783 So we are campaigning against illiteracy, right? 137 00:06:07,817 --> 00:06:09,285 Or childhood obesity. 138 00:06:09,319 --> 00:06:11,053 I'm waiting to see which one polls better. 139 00:06:11,087 --> 00:06:12,521 In fact, I'm waiting for the numbers to get in. 140 00:06:12,556 --> 00:06:13,655 Let me see what's going on. 141 00:06:13,690 --> 00:06:17,259 What's going on? 142 00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:19,628 I just got a bunch of texts from Mel. 143 00:06:19,663 --> 00:06:21,097 "Elka's about to take the stand." 144 00:06:21,131 --> 00:06:22,999 "I'm not supposed to text in court." 145 00:06:23,033 --> 00:06:26,369 "Here comes the bailiff, he's taking my cell ph..." 146 00:06:26,404 --> 00:06:27,637 That's the end of the transmission. 147 00:06:27,672 --> 00:06:28,638 Oh, damn. 148 00:06:28,673 --> 00:06:29,940 Well, this story better be good 149 00:06:29,974 --> 00:06:32,275 if it's making us miss all of that. 150 00:06:32,310 --> 00:06:33,610 The poll is in. 151 00:06:33,644 --> 00:06:35,912 It's childhood obesity over illiteracy. 152 00:06:35,947 --> 00:06:38,715 They probably couldn't read the poll question. 153 00:06:38,749 --> 00:06:41,719 Tell the dumb kid to go home and send in the fatty. 154 00:06:41,753 --> 00:06:43,587 Hey, I know you. 155 00:06:43,621 --> 00:06:45,589 You're Joy Scroggs, the eyebrow queen. 156 00:06:45,624 --> 00:06:47,357 You did Oprah's arch. 157 00:06:47,392 --> 00:06:48,992 I'm not at liberty to say, but trust me, 158 00:06:49,027 --> 00:06:50,061 if I were at liberty to say, 159 00:06:50,095 --> 00:06:51,228 my answer would certainly not be, 160 00:06:51,263 --> 00:06:52,930 "I'm not at liberty to say." 161 00:06:52,965 --> 00:06:55,733 I like the way you evade. It's nice, it's sexy. 162 00:06:55,768 --> 00:06:57,735 Would you be willing to do my husband's brows? 163 00:06:57,770 --> 00:07:00,171 Or should I say brow? 164 00:07:00,205 --> 00:07:01,472 - Oh, tragedy. - Mm-Hmm. 165 00:07:01,507 --> 00:07:04,041 Walking hair ball. 166 00:07:04,076 --> 00:07:06,044 - Well, it's very manly. - Mm-Hmm. 167 00:07:06,078 --> 00:07:07,512 Oh, let's not sugarcoat it. 168 00:07:07,546 --> 00:07:09,514 We're not getting within 50 miles of D.C. 169 00:07:09,549 --> 00:07:13,318 With these dandruff-catchers on his forehead. 170 00:07:13,352 --> 00:07:15,720 So if you'd be willing to trim back these hedges 171 00:07:15,755 --> 00:07:18,423 you can name your price. 172 00:07:18,457 --> 00:07:19,557 Well, actually, instead of money 173 00:07:19,591 --> 00:07:20,892 I could use some help. 174 00:07:20,926 --> 00:07:22,627 You see, I'm having some green card problems 175 00:07:22,661 --> 00:07:23,728 and your influence... 176 00:07:23,762 --> 00:07:25,663 Hey, buddy, look at you! 177 00:07:25,697 --> 00:07:27,364 [Giggling] 178 00:07:27,399 --> 00:07:28,933 You call this obese? 179 00:07:28,968 --> 00:07:30,935 This is husky at best. 180 00:07:30,969 --> 00:07:33,470 Now you go find me a fatter kid or a smaller shirt. 181 00:07:33,505 --> 00:07:34,872 Now. 182 00:07:34,906 --> 00:07:37,741 Have you seen the buffet table? 183 00:07:43,514 --> 00:07:45,215 Please state your name. 184 00:07:45,249 --> 00:07:47,016 Elka Ostrovsky. 185 00:07:47,051 --> 00:07:49,652 I'm single. 186 00:07:49,686 --> 00:07:53,521 Very single. 187 00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:55,423 A capricorn. 188 00:07:55,457 --> 00:07:58,860 And I love nights curled up with a book, 189 00:07:58,894 --> 00:08:03,197 and a special someone. 190 00:08:08,236 --> 00:08:10,871 Actually, it was my late husband's wishes 191 00:08:10,905 --> 00:08:13,707 that the stolen items remain hidden. 192 00:08:13,741 --> 00:08:19,280 I'm powerless in the presence of a real man. 193 00:08:21,383 --> 00:08:25,621 I used to be, too. 194 00:08:25,656 --> 00:08:28,024 Mrs. Ostrovsky, you continued to honor 195 00:08:28,058 --> 00:08:30,193 your late husband's wishes after his passing? 196 00:08:30,227 --> 00:08:32,195 Oh, yes. 197 00:08:32,230 --> 00:08:34,932 Those were not easy years. 198 00:08:34,966 --> 00:08:38,602 So, so alone. 199 00:08:38,637 --> 00:08:42,006 So in need of comfort. 200 00:08:44,409 --> 00:08:47,945 Juror number eight, are you okay? 201 00:08:49,914 --> 00:08:52,182 You seem to be breathing heavy. 202 00:08:52,217 --> 00:08:55,319 It's creepy and distracting. 203 00:08:55,354 --> 00:08:58,322 Doing fine, your honor. 204 00:08:58,356 --> 00:09:00,390 Just fine. 205 00:09:00,425 --> 00:09:04,328 And the witness may continue... 206 00:09:04,363 --> 00:09:06,531 As long as she likes. 207 00:09:16,286 --> 00:09:17,353 Wow, it sounds like the 208 00:09:17,387 --> 00:09:19,422 prosecution has a pretty strong case. 209 00:09:19,456 --> 00:09:21,156 Whatever. 210 00:09:21,190 --> 00:09:23,092 - You don't seem very upset. - Right? 211 00:09:23,126 --> 00:09:25,827 I mean, the case goes to the jury tomorrow. 212 00:09:25,862 --> 00:09:27,996 She keeps saying she's got an ace up her sleeve. 213 00:09:28,030 --> 00:09:29,230 Not an ace. 214 00:09:30,264 --> 00:09:31,565 A letter. 215 00:09:32,100 --> 00:09:35,468 From juror number eight. 216 00:09:36,003 --> 00:09:37,938 "Meet me in the second floor broom closet 217 00:09:37,973 --> 00:09:39,340 "tomorrow before court." 218 00:09:39,374 --> 00:09:42,343 "I'll have my driver drop me off a little early." 219 00:09:42,377 --> 00:09:43,477 Your driver? 220 00:09:43,512 --> 00:09:45,746 He sounds rich. 221 00:09:45,781 --> 00:09:46,914 On the other hand, how rich could he be 222 00:09:46,949 --> 00:09:49,684 if he couldn't get off jury duty? 223 00:09:50,219 --> 00:09:51,386 You're seriously going to go 224 00:09:51,420 --> 00:09:53,055 into a broom closet with a juror? 225 00:09:53,089 --> 00:09:54,523 Isn't that jury tampering? 226 00:09:54,808 --> 00:09:59,511 It is if you're doing it right. 227 00:09:59,545 --> 00:10:00,545 Elka! 228 00:10:00,579 --> 00:10:01,646 What? 229 00:10:01,680 --> 00:10:03,848 Flirting with the guy was your idea. 230 00:10:03,882 --> 00:10:05,983 Yeah, but I meant just flirting. 231 00:10:06,017 --> 00:10:07,651 And you could get into trouble. 232 00:10:07,685 --> 00:10:09,519 I say avoid the jury tampering 233 00:10:09,553 --> 00:10:11,388 and just pray for a light sentence. 234 00:10:11,422 --> 00:10:13,223 I don't need prayer. 235 00:10:13,257 --> 00:10:16,893 I've got my broom closet. 236 00:10:16,927 --> 00:10:18,060 Broom closet? 237 00:10:18,095 --> 00:10:19,195 Both of you standing? 238 00:10:19,230 --> 00:10:23,166 I object. Morally and logistically. 239 00:10:23,201 --> 00:10:24,968 How far are you willing to go? 240 00:10:25,002 --> 00:10:29,439 Oh, pretty far. I'm desperate. 241 00:10:29,473 --> 00:10:33,276 Also, it's been a while. 242 00:10:48,961 --> 00:10:52,063 Justice has been serviced. 243 00:10:55,334 --> 00:10:57,301 I wonder how long the jury will deliberate. 244 00:10:57,336 --> 00:10:58,770 Doesn't matter to me. 245 00:10:58,804 --> 00:11:01,438 Did you... 246 00:11:01,473 --> 00:11:05,776 I met with a certain juror on a subject of mutual interest. 247 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:09,880 All right, I have important breaking news 248 00:11:09,915 --> 00:11:11,248 and it's not even about me. 249 00:11:11,283 --> 00:11:12,783 Have you heard something about the trial? 250 00:11:12,817 --> 00:11:14,218 It's about Joy. 251 00:11:14,252 --> 00:11:16,754 You're the Governor's hooker. What? 252 00:11:16,788 --> 00:11:18,489 Well, there's a picture of you on his lap, 253 00:11:18,524 --> 00:11:20,992 it's the lead story on Channel Seven's website. 254 00:11:21,026 --> 00:11:24,429 "Gov in photo scandal with mystery straddler?" 255 00:11:24,463 --> 00:11:27,098 Well, I had to sit on top of him for leverage. 256 00:11:27,133 --> 00:11:29,735 I practically needed a chain saw to thin those brows, 257 00:11:29,769 --> 00:11:32,637 I had to use a number seven tweezers. 258 00:11:32,672 --> 00:11:36,709 If you were in the business, you'd know how extreme that was. 259 00:11:36,743 --> 00:11:38,410 God, this is terrible. What am I gonna do? 260 00:11:38,445 --> 00:11:39,578 No, it's okay. It's okay. 261 00:11:39,613 --> 00:11:40,846 You can't see your face. 262 00:11:40,881 --> 00:11:42,916 Oh, it's her all right. Look at the hand. 263 00:11:42,950 --> 00:11:45,986 Oh, yeah. 264 00:11:46,020 --> 00:11:49,289 - What about my hand? - It looks like a man hand. 265 00:11:49,323 --> 00:11:50,891 No, it doesn't. 266 00:11:50,926 --> 00:11:52,059 It's just the angle of the picture. 267 00:11:52,094 --> 00:11:53,627 My hand is foreshortened. 268 00:11:53,662 --> 00:11:56,664 Does that mean it looks like a dude's? 269 00:11:56,698 --> 00:11:57,899 Come on. Look at her legs. 270 00:11:57,933 --> 00:11:59,801 That's obviously not a man's leg. 271 00:11:59,835 --> 00:12:02,737 Yes, those belong to a beautiful, sexy woman. 272 00:12:02,771 --> 00:12:04,005 Thank you. 273 00:12:04,039 --> 00:12:05,873 Who will reveal her steamy affair with the Governor 274 00:12:05,908 --> 00:12:09,977 on my show, "Oh, hi, Ohio." 275 00:12:10,012 --> 00:12:11,779 But you know I'm just plucking his eye brows. 276 00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:12,981 Well, that's not what it looks like. 277 00:12:13,015 --> 00:12:14,816 Oh, please say that you're his hooker. 278 00:12:14,850 --> 00:12:17,418 No, then I'll never get my green card. 279 00:12:17,453 --> 00:12:18,820 I'll go on your show and tell the truth. 280 00:12:18,854 --> 00:12:20,088 The truth? 281 00:12:20,122 --> 00:12:23,558 Well, my viewers deserve better than that. 282 00:12:23,592 --> 00:12:25,560 Hasn't the Governor's office said anything yet? 283 00:12:25,595 --> 00:12:26,895 No, not a word. 284 00:12:26,929 --> 00:12:29,230 So I could own this story if you'd just play ball. 285 00:12:29,265 --> 00:12:31,999 Like a dude. 286 00:12:32,033 --> 00:12:34,234 No, and that's final. 287 00:12:34,269 --> 00:12:36,537 [Slams down gavel] 288 00:12:36,572 --> 00:12:37,538 Ladies and gentlemen, 289 00:12:37,573 --> 00:12:40,809 the jury has reached a verdict. 290 00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:43,912 What did I say about looking at me? 291 00:12:43,947 --> 00:12:46,849 That messed up face is freaking me out. 292 00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:02,027 We the jury find the defendant, Elka Ostrovsky... 293 00:13:02,426 --> 00:13:05,080 Watch me act surprised. 294 00:13:05,239 --> 00:13:08,016 Guilty. 295 00:13:08,050 --> 00:13:11,286 What? 296 00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:14,155 Defendant will remain free on bail until sentencing. 297 00:13:14,190 --> 00:13:16,524 And defense counsel will be responsible 298 00:13:16,559 --> 00:13:19,928 for all ancillary court costs, including, but not limited, 299 00:13:19,963 --> 00:13:22,965 to the $800 the court spent on this damn weave. 300 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,768 [Slams down gavel] 301 00:13:28,206 --> 00:13:29,306 Now don't panic. 302 00:13:29,341 --> 00:13:30,741 The judge still has a lot of discretion 303 00:13:30,776 --> 00:13:32,310 when it comes to sentencing. 304 00:13:32,344 --> 00:13:33,711 Now if you'll all testify on her behalf, 305 00:13:33,746 --> 00:13:35,146 and I'll turn on the charm. 306 00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:38,850 Is it possible your face has gotten even less attractive? 307 00:13:38,885 --> 00:13:40,418 It has? 308 00:13:40,453 --> 00:13:42,087 Oh, damn. 309 00:13:42,121 --> 00:13:45,123 I think I'm having an allergic reaction to the salve. 310 00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:47,292 Are you... crying? 311 00:13:47,326 --> 00:13:49,261 Some of it is my stitches weeping. 312 00:13:49,295 --> 00:13:50,462 But... 313 00:13:50,496 --> 00:13:52,264 Yeah, I am a little upset. 314 00:13:52,298 --> 00:13:54,232 Women are being so mean to me. 315 00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:55,567 Nobody's opening a door, 316 00:13:55,601 --> 00:13:57,002 or holding an elevator. 317 00:13:57,036 --> 00:14:01,073 I had to tear open my own sugar packet at Starbuck's! 318 00:14:01,107 --> 00:14:03,776 I need a moment. 319 00:14:03,810 --> 00:14:05,044 What went wrong? 320 00:14:05,078 --> 00:14:07,313 I thought you tampered with juror number eight. 321 00:14:07,348 --> 00:14:09,749 I tampered the heck out of him. 322 00:14:09,784 --> 00:14:12,719 Oh, there he is now. Let's go get him. 323 00:14:12,754 --> 00:14:14,888 - You! - I thought you liked her. 324 00:14:14,923 --> 00:14:17,157 Who? 325 00:14:17,191 --> 00:14:19,993 Hello. 326 00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,595 Sorry, he's having a little episode. 327 00:14:21,629 --> 00:14:23,396 It happens from time to time. 328 00:14:23,431 --> 00:14:24,931 What do you mean, "an episode?" 329 00:14:24,966 --> 00:14:26,366 He suffers from a condition called 330 00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:28,601 "Transient Global Amnesia." 331 00:14:28,635 --> 00:14:30,002 If he gets over-stimulated, 332 00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:32,471 he loses his short-term memory for a while. 333 00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:33,572 Something must have gotten him 334 00:14:33,606 --> 00:14:38,344 excited this morning and triggered it. 335 00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,712 He forgot everything? 336 00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:44,017 Everything that happened between breakfast and lunch. 337 00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,554 You poor bow-tied son-of-a-gun. 338 00:14:46,588 --> 00:14:51,426 You don't even know what you had. 339 00:15:05,927 --> 00:15:07,927 - You couldn't sleep either? - Mm-mm. 340 00:15:07,962 --> 00:15:09,362 I'm still trying to figure out 341 00:15:09,396 --> 00:15:10,496 what I'm gonna say at Elka's sentencing hearing. 342 00:15:10,530 --> 00:15:11,664 I'm so scared for her. 343 00:15:11,698 --> 00:15:13,599 Yeah, me too. 344 00:15:13,633 --> 00:15:15,067 It's so hard to believe that 345 00:15:15,101 --> 00:15:17,603 they could actually send her to jail. 346 00:15:17,637 --> 00:15:18,670 I know. 347 00:15:18,705 --> 00:15:20,239 Prison. 348 00:15:20,273 --> 00:15:22,307 It's horrible. 349 00:15:22,342 --> 00:15:25,543 Well, not always. 350 00:15:25,578 --> 00:15:27,712 On Edge of Tomorrow, when Honor St. Raven 351 00:15:27,746 --> 00:15:30,015 went in for double murder, 352 00:15:30,049 --> 00:15:31,683 she was released after six weeks 353 00:15:31,717 --> 00:15:34,252 for saving the warden's children from an axe murderess. 354 00:15:34,286 --> 00:15:35,487 And not only that, 355 00:15:35,521 --> 00:15:37,855 she earned a degree in Advanced Bionics 356 00:15:37,889 --> 00:15:40,591 from the Yale University of Correspondence. 357 00:15:40,625 --> 00:15:45,094 So sometimes prison is just what you make of it. 358 00:15:45,129 --> 00:15:47,597 Elka's gonna be there more than six weeks. 359 00:15:47,631 --> 00:15:50,433 Ah, well then she can get two degrees. 360 00:15:50,467 --> 00:15:51,434 Sorry. 361 00:15:51,468 --> 00:15:53,669 I joke when I'm scared. 362 00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:55,704 I guess I figure that if I act as if 363 00:15:55,739 --> 00:15:58,241 it isn't serious, maybe it won't be. 364 00:15:58,275 --> 00:16:00,010 Unfortunately, it is. 365 00:16:00,044 --> 00:16:01,912 Oh. You too, huh? 366 00:16:01,946 --> 00:16:06,517 I keep picturing Elka alone in a cold, dark cell. 367 00:16:06,552 --> 00:16:10,755 But that image has lost its happy glow for me. 368 00:16:10,790 --> 00:16:12,124 You know, if none of us can sleep 369 00:16:12,158 --> 00:16:13,892 I bet Elka's still up. 370 00:16:13,927 --> 00:16:15,227 Her light's still on. 371 00:16:15,262 --> 00:16:18,464 She's probably going crazy with anxiety. 372 00:16:18,498 --> 00:16:21,133 Pour her a cup of tea, I'll go get her. 373 00:16:21,168 --> 00:16:22,635 God, what a day. 374 00:16:22,669 --> 00:16:23,836 Elka getting convicted, 375 00:16:23,870 --> 00:16:27,640 and you literally man-handling the Governor. 376 00:16:27,674 --> 00:16:30,409 God, I could use that as a lead-in to my story. 377 00:16:30,444 --> 00:16:33,279 There is no story. 378 00:16:33,313 --> 00:16:34,847 I just wish I could get the Governor's office 379 00:16:34,881 --> 00:16:36,215 to return my phone calls 380 00:16:36,249 --> 00:16:38,684 before someone ID's me and I get deported. 381 00:16:38,718 --> 00:16:40,486 Now, see, this is why you have to strike first. 382 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:41,887 Now let me get your story out. 383 00:16:41,922 --> 00:16:43,122 Tell the world about 384 00:16:43,157 --> 00:16:46,393 the Governor's "sex for amnesty" scheme. 385 00:16:46,427 --> 00:16:49,396 There was no "sex for amnesty" scheme. 386 00:16:49,430 --> 00:16:52,934 Mostly because I didn't think of it fast enough. 387 00:16:52,968 --> 00:16:55,436 Why can't I just say I was plucking his brows? 388 00:16:55,471 --> 00:16:56,704 Well, why say that when I can 389 00:16:56,739 --> 00:16:58,540 turn you into something much better. 390 00:16:58,574 --> 00:17:00,175 A celebrity victim. 391 00:17:00,209 --> 00:17:02,110 Now say what you will about our country, 392 00:17:02,144 --> 00:17:04,346 but we do not deport our celebrities. 393 00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:09,017 No, at worst, we exile them to reality shows. 394 00:17:09,052 --> 00:17:11,019 She's gone. 395 00:17:11,053 --> 00:17:12,187 Elka's gone. 396 00:17:12,221 --> 00:17:13,988 Well, where did she go? 397 00:17:14,023 --> 00:17:15,723 I don't know, but she's gone and she left a note. 398 00:17:15,758 --> 00:17:16,858 What's it say? 399 00:17:16,892 --> 00:17:19,027 "I'm gone." 400 00:17:19,061 --> 00:17:20,294 That's it? 401 00:17:20,329 --> 00:17:23,298 "P. S. Sorry to go without saying good-bye, 402 00:17:23,332 --> 00:17:24,933 "but when I realized my sentence depended on 403 00:17:24,967 --> 00:17:28,203 "whatever half-baked testimony you three bird-brains cooked up, 404 00:17:28,237 --> 00:17:32,006 "I decided to take my chances and light out for the territory." 405 00:17:32,041 --> 00:17:34,209 What's that? "Light out for the territory?" 406 00:17:34,243 --> 00:17:36,445 It means she went West. 407 00:17:36,479 --> 00:17:38,580 "P.P.S. There's more Internet pictures" 408 00:17:38,614 --> 00:17:41,349 of the Governor getting off with Lady French Fry. 409 00:17:41,384 --> 00:17:43,685 Oh, my God, no. 410 00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:44,853 Lady French Fry. 411 00:17:44,887 --> 00:17:46,388 That's a new one. 412 00:17:46,422 --> 00:17:49,058 "P.P.P.S. Joy, I may not see you again, 413 00:17:49,092 --> 00:17:52,228 and I've been sitting on "Lady French Fry" for a week. 414 00:17:52,263 --> 00:17:53,463 I had to get it off my chest. 415 00:17:53,497 --> 00:17:58,634 If you had a chest, you'd know what I mean. 416 00:17:58,669 --> 00:18:00,903 She loved to insult my chest. 417 00:18:00,938 --> 00:18:02,138 And my hair. 418 00:18:02,172 --> 00:18:05,174 And my inability to hold on to a man. 419 00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:07,143 And my intelligence. 420 00:18:07,177 --> 00:18:09,645 And my morals. 421 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,682 She's like a mother to me. 422 00:18:12,716 --> 00:18:16,218 You don't think she's actually gone West, do you? 423 00:18:16,253 --> 00:18:18,321 What state is West of Ohio? 424 00:18:18,355 --> 00:18:23,561 I wanna say Maryland. 425 00:18:23,595 --> 00:18:24,796 Well, she's out there somewhere, 426 00:18:24,830 --> 00:18:27,232 and we have to find her before the police do. 427 00:18:27,266 --> 00:18:30,102 Where would she go to hide out? 428 00:18:35,776 --> 00:18:38,977 If you're back here, who's driving the wagon? 429 00:18:39,012 --> 00:18:40,546 The horse, naturally. 430 00:18:40,580 --> 00:18:42,548 Relax thyself. 431 00:18:42,582 --> 00:18:45,117 She knows the way. 432 00:18:45,151 --> 00:18:47,119 So where we're going, 433 00:18:47,153 --> 00:18:50,589 I'm completely cut off from the outside world? 434 00:18:50,623 --> 00:18:53,558 Indeed. 435 00:18:53,592 --> 00:18:55,360 Works for me. 436 00:18:55,394 --> 00:19:00,430 Sync by dr.jackson | Corr. by Alice for www.addic7ed.com 437 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:05,030 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 31053

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