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00:00:04,087 --> 00:00:07,257
ANNOUNCER:
CBS presentsthis program in color.
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( theme song playing )
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00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:05,315
Prisoners.
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00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:06,942
From time to time
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00:01:06,984 --> 00:01:10,988
as Kommandant of Stalag 13,
out of my own free will,
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I bring you
news of the war
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00:01:13,115 --> 00:01:15,617
of which you are
no longer a part.
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00:01:15,826 --> 00:01:17,953
( muttering )
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00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:20,205
Things continue to go well
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00:01:20,247 --> 00:01:23,208
for the all-victorious
Third Reich.
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( groaning and muttering )
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00:01:25,460 --> 00:01:27,921
Yes, I know,
you would wish it otherwise,
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00:01:27,963 --> 00:01:30,924
but it is necessary
for you to look at the facts.
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00:01:30,966 --> 00:01:32,843
New and powerful
weapons
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00:01:32,843 --> 00:01:35,762
continue to pour
from our factories.
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00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:39,349
I have just returned from
a nearby Panzer division
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00:01:39,391 --> 00:01:43,437
completely equipped with the new
and secret Tiger tanks,
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00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:46,190
which will crush
all resistance
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00:01:46,231 --> 00:01:47,608
like eggshells.
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00:01:47,649 --> 00:01:48,859
( muttering )
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00:01:48,859 --> 00:01:50,485
The Allies would love
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00:01:50,527 --> 00:01:53,322
to get their hands
on one, believe me.
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00:01:53,363 --> 00:01:56,700
However, you as prisoners must
look upon this new weapon
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00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:58,577
of the invincible Third Reich
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00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:02,998
as another guarantee that
soon the war will be over.
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00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:04,791
Dismissed.
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00:02:04,833 --> 00:02:05,792
( groaning )
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00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:06,960
Colonel Klink.
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00:02:07,002 --> 00:02:09,004
Yes, Colonel Hogan?
30
00:02:09,046 --> 00:02:10,547
Uh, this Panzer
division
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with the new
Tiger tanks,
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00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,384
aren't they just
west of here?
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00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:15,427
North.
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00:02:15,469 --> 00:02:17,304
Uh, what's that to you?
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00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:20,849
Just asking.
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00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:23,060
Steal a German tank?
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00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:24,561
We'll
give it back.
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00:02:24,603 --> 00:02:27,147
After we take it apart
and make blueprints of it.
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00:02:27,189 --> 00:02:28,315
Well, how do we
get a hold of it.
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00:02:28,357 --> 00:02:29,358
How do we get it in here?
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00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:30,609
Where are we going
to hide a tank?
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00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:31,735
Where do we
take it apart?
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00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:34,279
Look, I got the idea
of stealing it, right?
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00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:36,073
The rest is detail.
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00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:38,408
( chattering )
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00:02:48,210 --> 00:02:51,630
( hammering and sawing )
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00:02:51,672 --> 00:02:52,923
Guard coming.
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00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:54,591
Okay, fellas, knock it off.
49
00:02:56,593 --> 00:02:58,971
Get that ladder
out of here, huh?
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00:03:00,764 --> 00:03:02,683
As you were,
it's only Schultz.
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00:03:02,724 --> 00:03:04,643
Okay, get back to work.
52
00:03:08,105 --> 00:03:10,274
Make it fast,
not much time.
53
00:03:15,279 --> 00:03:17,406
What? What is? What? What?
54
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:19,950
What's this? What?
What is what?
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00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:21,618
Remodeling, Schultz.
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00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:23,287
We're going
to take out that wall
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00:03:23,287 --> 00:03:24,705
and put in
a picture window.
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00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:26,331
That'll give us
a sweeping vista
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00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:27,666
to the delousing
station.
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00:03:27,708 --> 00:03:29,459
Then we're going
to replace this stuff
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00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:30,627
with some Danish modern.
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00:03:30,627 --> 00:03:33,046
What would you think
of Provincial?
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00:03:33,088 --> 00:03:34,214
Please, Colonel Hogan!
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00:03:34,256 --> 00:03:36,300
Schultz, how else do
we get the tank in?
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00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:38,177
Uh, the tank?
Tank? Tank? Tank?
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00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:39,428
So we can
take it apart.
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00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:41,805
Oh, no.
I don't see anything.
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00:03:41,805 --> 00:03:43,724
I hear nothing,
nothing.
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00:03:44,016 --> 00:03:45,309
Sergeant!
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00:03:45,309 --> 00:03:46,977
What is Ihr Namen?
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00:03:47,019 --> 00:03:49,646
Schultz, Herr Leutnant.
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00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:51,815
I have uncovered
a plot to...
73
00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,234
And that is why
you hear nothing
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00:03:54,276 --> 00:03:55,819
and you see nothing?
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00:03:55,819 --> 00:03:58,155
Herr Leutnant, this
is a speech problem.
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00:03:58,405 --> 00:04:00,073
I sometimes speak.
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00:04:00,115 --> 00:04:03,827
I say things I do
not know what I say.
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00:04:03,827 --> 00:04:05,204
He's right,
Lieutenant Newkirk.
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00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,538
I urge leniency for this man
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00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:08,332
on the grounds
of general incompetence.
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00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,834
That's right,
Herr Leutnant Newkirk.
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00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:12,836
Why sometimes my wife
even says...
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00:04:15,547 --> 00:04:17,007
Newkirk?
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00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:18,759
How'd you like
me accent?
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00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:19,843
It was great.
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00:04:19,885 --> 00:04:21,178
LeBeau, you want
to put some padding
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00:04:21,220 --> 00:04:22,513
in those shoulders
there, please?
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00:04:22,513 --> 00:04:23,514
Right, sir.
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00:04:23,514 --> 00:04:24,848
NEWKIRK:
All right.
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00:04:24,890 --> 00:04:26,683
What a relief.
91
00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:30,521
If the Gestapo would uncover
what's going on around here...
92
00:04:30,521 --> 00:04:31,605
Colonel Hogan?
93
00:04:31,647 --> 00:04:32,648
Hmm?
94
00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:34,399
What is he doing
in the uniform?
95
00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:35,776
Colonel Hogan, please!
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00:04:35,901 --> 00:04:37,611
Oh, you went
too far.
97
00:04:37,653 --> 00:04:39,154
I must
report this.
98
00:04:39,196 --> 00:04:41,865
It would be worth my life
if I do not report this.
99
00:04:41,865 --> 00:04:43,367
It's only
until tomorrow,
100
00:04:43,367 --> 00:04:44,910
and then he's going
to take it off again.
101
00:04:44,952 --> 00:04:46,036
Ah...
102
00:04:46,036 --> 00:04:47,371
After he steals
the tank.
103
00:04:47,412 --> 00:04:48,622
Oh!
104
00:04:48,664 --> 00:04:49,248
From the Panzer
division.
105
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:50,624
Oh!
106
00:04:50,666 --> 00:04:52,000
And brings it here
into the barracks.
107
00:04:52,042 --> 00:04:53,168
Oh! I see nothing.
108
00:04:53,210 --> 00:04:54,461
I was not here.
109
00:04:54,503 --> 00:04:57,256
I did not even
get up this morning!
110
00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:04,721
Herr Kommandant,
Colonel Hogan is here.
111
00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:09,601
Very good taste you have
in furnishings, sir.
112
00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:11,937
Yes, yes, yes.
What is it, Colonel Hogan?
113
00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:13,063
I'm very busy.
114
00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:14,857
Paperwork from Berlin.
115
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:17,276
No one has any idea.
116
00:05:17,359 --> 00:05:18,694
Oh, I sympathize.
117
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:20,696
However, I must protest
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00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:22,614
as a violation
of the Geneva Convention,
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00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:26,326
the private interrogation
of my men by a Gestapo officer.
120
00:05:26,368 --> 00:05:27,786
Nonsense!
121
00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:29,246
There's no
Gestapo officer here.
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00:05:29,246 --> 00:05:30,581
Dismissed.
123
00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:32,583
Most likely an impostor.
124
00:05:34,084 --> 00:05:36,253
A Gestapo
officer here?
125
00:05:36,253 --> 00:05:37,671
What is he
asking about?
126
00:05:37,713 --> 00:05:39,214
Nothing important.
127
00:05:39,256 --> 00:05:41,633
Just wanted to know
if we ever heard you
128
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:44,469
say anything about...
the usual Gestapo stuff.
129
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:45,637
About what?
About what?
130
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:46,722
I'm completely loyal.
131
00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:48,098
They know that
in Berlin.
132
00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:49,975
Oh, sure, but you know
how they are.
133
00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,560
What did your
men tell him?
134
00:05:51,602 --> 00:05:53,103
Did they tell
him the truth?
135
00:05:53,145 --> 00:05:54,146
( knocking at door )
136
00:05:54,188 --> 00:05:55,439
I cannot
be disturbed!
137
00:05:55,564 --> 00:05:56,982
What did
they tell him?
138
00:05:57,024 --> 00:05:58,192
( knocking )
139
00:05:58,233 --> 00:05:58,692
Come in.
140
00:06:01,278 --> 00:06:02,988
Langenscheidt, are
you hard of hearing,
141
00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,573
or do you need a trip
to the front
142
00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:05,699
to sharpen
your senses?
143
00:06:05,741 --> 00:06:07,159
The main gate
is calling,
144
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:09,077
begging
the Kommandant's pardon.
145
00:06:09,119 --> 00:06:10,704
A Gestapo Leutnant
is there.
146
00:06:10,746 --> 00:06:11,955
Tell him nothing!
147
00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:13,207
What does he want?
148
00:06:13,248 --> 00:06:14,416
To leave,
Herr Kommandant.
149
00:06:14,458 --> 00:06:17,127
He has a pass, but they have
no record of him entering.
150
00:06:17,127 --> 00:06:18,128
What do I care?
151
00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:19,505
If he wants out,
let him out.
152
00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:21,131
The sooner the better.
Dummkopf.
153
00:06:21,131 --> 00:06:22,216
Yes, Herr Kommandant.
154
00:06:22,257 --> 00:06:23,425
Certainly,
Herr Kommandant.
155
00:06:23,467 --> 00:06:24,259
Right away,
Herr Kommandant.
156
00:06:27,346 --> 00:06:30,474
Nasty lot,
that Himmler crowd.
157
00:06:30,474 --> 00:06:33,393
Newkirk then enters
with the Tiger tank to here.
158
00:06:33,435 --> 00:06:35,687
LeBeau, you go through
the fence here
159
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:36,855
to rendezvous with the agent,
160
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:38,649
who will later
carry out the blueprints,
161
00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:39,983
rendezvous point
being up here.
162
00:06:40,025 --> 00:06:42,069
Usual procedure,
Colonel?
163
00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:43,487
Usual procedure.
164
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:44,988
You change clothes
with the agent,
165
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:47,533
who then, posing as you,
will be captured by the guards.
166
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:49,368
Incidentally,
Kinch has made radio contact
167
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:50,869
with the people
sending the agent.
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00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,247
Code name Tiger.
Part of Operation Tiger.
169
00:06:53,288 --> 00:06:54,248
HOGAN:
Right.
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00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:56,333
35 seconds
after Newkirk enters,
171
00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:59,753
the alarm will be sounded
for your escape, LeBeau,
172
00:06:59,795 --> 00:07:01,046
and under cover of the search,
173
00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:02,673
Newkirk will bring
the tank around to here.
174
00:07:02,673 --> 00:07:04,091
( bell ringing )
175
00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:05,384
Roll call, Colonel.
176
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:06,802
31 seconds early.
177
00:07:06,844 --> 00:07:10,180
Why can't these Germans
learn to be methodical?
178
00:07:10,222 --> 00:07:11,682
All right, let's go.
179
00:07:11,723 --> 00:07:12,724
SCHULTZ:
Raus!
180
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,017
Everybody raus.
181
00:07:14,059 --> 00:07:17,062
Roll call, everybody raus,raus, raus, raus, raus.
182
00:07:17,104 --> 00:07:18,480
Mach schnell.
Everybody raus.
183
00:07:18,522 --> 00:07:21,191
Mach schnell, schnell,schnell, schnell, shnell.
184
00:07:21,191 --> 00:07:23,902
Everybody raus.
Everybody raus.
185
00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:25,529
Every...
186
00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:30,534
Ah, beautiful evening,
isn't it, Schultz?
187
00:07:30,576 --> 00:07:32,494
( grumbling )
188
00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:45,048
Eins, Zwei, Drei, Vier, Funf,
189
00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:48,760
Sechs, Sieben,Acht, Neun, Zehn...
190
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:51,013
Elf is next.
Eleven, Schultz.
191
00:07:51,054 --> 00:07:52,306
I know how to count.
192
00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,099
So many of
the younger guards--
193
00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:55,726
I think it's the way
they're taught.
194
00:07:55,767 --> 00:07:57,186
( grumbles )
195
00:07:57,227 --> 00:08:03,275
Zwolf, Dreizehn,Vierzehn...
196
00:08:03,317 --> 00:08:05,360
Report!
197
00:08:05,402 --> 00:08:08,363
How can I make a report
when number 15 is missing?
198
00:08:08,405 --> 00:08:09,656
Look at
the bright side:
199
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:11,575
14 are here.
200
00:08:11,575 --> 00:08:12,534
KLINK:
Report!
201
00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:18,248
Herr Kommandant, I have
to make a report.
202
00:08:18,248 --> 00:08:19,583
As a matter
of fact...
203
00:08:19,625 --> 00:08:20,876
Schultz!
204
00:08:20,918 --> 00:08:24,671
I do not want a social chat.
I want a report.
205
00:08:24,713 --> 00:08:26,381
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant!
206
00:08:26,423 --> 00:08:28,592
I...
207
00:08:28,592 --> 00:08:30,511
( tank approaching )
208
00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:43,482
Herr Kommandant,
the Tiger tank is here.
209
00:08:52,991 --> 00:08:54,993
Who is Kommandant Klink?
210
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:57,079
Heil Hitler.
211
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,372
Heil. I-I...
212
00:08:58,413 --> 00:09:01,124
Well, where are these
rebellious prisoners?
213
00:09:01,124 --> 00:09:06,004
The Tiger tank will smash
them flat like pancakes.
214
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:07,005
Rebellious prisoners?
215
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:10,175
There are no
rebellious prisoners here.
216
00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:12,803
They are tame.
I've tamed them.
217
00:09:12,845 --> 00:09:14,471
Then why did you
request a tank?
218
00:09:14,513 --> 00:09:15,430
I did not.
219
00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:16,473
You question the word
220
00:09:16,515 --> 00:09:17,641
of a Gestapo officer?
221
00:09:17,641 --> 00:09:19,643
KLINK:
Certainly not.
222
00:09:19,643 --> 00:09:21,061
Here are my orders.
223
00:09:28,819 --> 00:09:30,487
KLINK:
They are certainly authentic. I...
224
00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:31,780
There could be any doubt?
225
00:09:31,822 --> 00:09:33,490
Not a doubt in the world.
226
00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:35,659
Sir, request
permission to speak.
227
00:09:35,659 --> 00:09:36,577
KLINK:
No!
228
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,121
Yes.
229
00:09:39,162 --> 00:09:40,664
I regret to inform
you, sir,
230
00:09:40,706 --> 00:09:42,416
one of my men seems
to have escaped.
231
00:09:42,833 --> 00:09:44,918
Escaped?
232
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:46,503
He received a letter
from home today, sir.
233
00:09:46,503 --> 00:09:50,340
His girl sent him
a candid snapshot.
234
00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:53,135
So these are your
"tamed" prisoners.
235
00:09:53,177 --> 00:09:56,263
No one has ever escaped
from Stalag 13.
236
00:09:56,305 --> 00:09:58,515
Sound the alarm.
Let loose the dogs.
237
00:09:58,557 --> 00:10:00,100
All guards turn out
for the search!
238
00:10:00,142 --> 00:10:02,352
( bell ringing )
All prisoners into the barracks!
239
00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:03,937
I assure you, sir, I...
240
00:10:03,979 --> 00:10:07,482
It is lucky for you, Klink,
that I'm here.
241
00:10:10,861 --> 00:10:12,946
Zuruck! Zuruck!
242
00:10:12,988 --> 00:10:14,531
Get back!
Back, back, back!
243
00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:17,618
Everybody zuruck!Zuruck! In barracks.
244
00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:20,621
Exciting, isn't it, Schultz?
245
00:10:22,623 --> 00:10:26,293
( tank engine revving )
246
00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:31,298
( mouthing )
247
00:11:04,706 --> 00:11:08,043
All I wanted
was an oil change.
248
00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:12,631
CARTER:
Hey, Colonel.
249
00:11:12,673 --> 00:11:14,883
Something's wrong outside.
The search is still going on.
250
00:11:14,925 --> 00:11:15,926
They didn't
find anybody?
251
00:11:15,968 --> 00:11:17,761
No, sir. Not Tiger,
not LeBeau, not anybody!
252
00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:18,637
( knocking )
253
00:11:33,861 --> 00:11:35,654
HOGAN:
LeBeau, what are you doing here?
254
00:11:35,696 --> 00:11:36,947
Sorry, Colonel!
255
00:11:36,947 --> 00:11:38,407
Sorry? What happened?
Didn't you meet Tiger?
256
00:11:38,657 --> 00:11:39,616
Yes, sir, I did.
257
00:11:39,658 --> 00:11:41,118
Yeah, what went wrong?
258
00:11:41,118 --> 00:11:43,370
Well,
just wouldn't work out.
259
00:11:43,412 --> 00:11:45,539
Are you out of your mind?
You know the orders.
260
00:11:45,581 --> 00:11:47,124
We don't use
the outside entrance
261
00:11:47,166 --> 00:11:48,876
and this tunnel
except in emergency.
262
00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:50,669
Krauts find out what
we've got underground
263
00:11:50,711 --> 00:11:52,254
and we've blown
the whole ball game.
264
00:11:52,296 --> 00:11:54,089
I thought it was an emergency.
265
00:11:54,131 --> 00:11:55,340
You thought
it was an emergency.
266
00:11:55,382 --> 00:11:56,925
And where's Tiger?
Right behind you?
267
00:11:56,967 --> 00:11:58,969
Awaiting permission
to come up, sir.
268
00:11:59,011 --> 00:12:00,637
Tiger, come up here.
269
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:07,060
Hello.
270
00:12:07,102 --> 00:12:09,980
( men whistling )
271
00:12:13,942 --> 00:12:15,235
You're Tiger.
272
00:12:15,277 --> 00:12:16,778
Oui. Tiger.
273
00:12:21,158 --> 00:12:22,201
Hello.
274
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,036
The changing
of the clothes, sir,
275
00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:25,496
it just wouldn't work out.
276
00:12:27,498 --> 00:12:29,666
What's the matter with
those people on the outside?
277
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:30,792
Don't they know procedure?
278
00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:32,169
You mad at me?
279
00:12:32,169 --> 00:12:33,378
Look, this is no game.
280
00:12:33,420 --> 00:12:36,006
Guys risk their lives
escaping from other camps.
281
00:12:36,048 --> 00:12:37,174
We sneak them in here.
282
00:12:37,174 --> 00:12:38,300
They depend on us
283
00:12:38,342 --> 00:12:39,676
to get them
out of Germany.
284
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:42,095
Our whole operation could
go right down the drain,
285
00:12:42,137 --> 00:12:43,764
just 'cause
they sent us a woman.
286
00:12:43,805 --> 00:12:47,100
I have had many more missions
more dangerous than this,
287
00:12:47,142 --> 00:12:49,686
and they did not send me,
I volunteer.
288
00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,271
All right,
so you're Mata Hari.
289
00:12:51,313 --> 00:12:52,898
But this is an all-male camp.
290
00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:56,902
Just where, for instance,
do we put you up?
291
00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:59,321
In the spirit of
"hands across the sea" and all that,
292
00:12:59,363 --> 00:13:02,324
uh, I hereby volunteer
to share my cubicle.
293
00:13:02,366 --> 00:13:06,203
( men talking at once )
294
00:13:14,878 --> 00:13:16,839
What's the matter,
Newkirk?
295
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:18,465
The matter is,
Colonel,
296
00:13:18,507 --> 00:13:20,217
that a gentleman's
tailor
297
00:13:20,217 --> 00:13:21,969
is a gentleman's tailor,
298
00:13:22,010 --> 00:13:24,805
and what we've got
here is no gentleman.
299
00:13:24,847 --> 00:13:28,267
Begging your pardon,
Tiger.
300
00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:29,935
But of course.
301
00:13:29,977 --> 00:13:31,311
Do the best you can.
302
00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:32,813
We've got to get her
out of here tonight
303
00:13:32,855 --> 00:13:34,189
looking like a German civilian--
304
00:13:34,231 --> 00:13:36,191
some kind of a bulky uniform
to carry these blueprints.
305
00:13:36,233 --> 00:13:38,277
Colonel, women
work as crew
306
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:40,070
on the German trains.
307
00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:42,823
HOGAN:
I don't care if you put on a kimono
308
00:13:42,865 --> 00:13:44,575
and go as Tokyo Rose.
309
00:13:44,616 --> 00:13:47,035
Let's just ad-lib
the whole thing, huh?
310
00:13:47,077 --> 00:13:49,371
Why not? The worst
that can happen to you
311
00:13:49,413 --> 00:13:52,166
is you get one week
in solitary, or I can get shot.
312
00:13:52,207 --> 00:13:53,667
All right, all right.
313
00:13:53,709 --> 00:13:55,544
Just have her ready
by roll call tonight.
314
00:13:55,586 --> 00:13:58,005
The diversion is the tank
coming out of the rec hall.
315
00:13:58,046 --> 00:13:59,673
Then you take off
after that.
316
00:13:59,715 --> 00:14:01,258
I thought it
was in pieces.
317
00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:02,759
It is in pieces.
318
00:14:02,759 --> 00:14:05,095
We're going to put it back
together again in the rec hall
319
00:14:05,137 --> 00:14:06,388
after the Germans
padlock the place.
320
00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:08,765
Sounds wild.
321
00:14:08,765 --> 00:14:10,225
NEWKIRK:
The Colonel never misses.
322
00:14:10,267 --> 00:14:13,687
Everything under
control always.
323
00:14:13,729 --> 00:14:14,897
Except his temper.
324
00:14:18,901 --> 00:14:20,694
Hello.
325
00:14:20,736 --> 00:14:22,154
Colonel Hogan,
please.
326
00:14:22,196 --> 00:14:24,281
Herr Kommandant
wants you in his office,
327
00:14:24,281 --> 00:14:25,824
quickly, quickly.
328
00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:27,034
He is boiling
329
00:14:27,075 --> 00:14:29,077
over the escape that
was not an escape.
330
00:14:29,119 --> 00:14:32,414
The guards were
searching all night.
331
00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:39,463
No. No.
332
00:14:39,463 --> 00:14:41,757
Tokyo Rose.
333
00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:45,677
Oh, Colonel Hogan,
this time you went too far.
334
00:14:45,719 --> 00:14:47,262
What am I saying?
335
00:14:47,429 --> 00:14:50,557
I see nothing. Nothing!
336
00:14:53,602 --> 00:14:55,562
Something I can do
for you, Commandant?
337
00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:59,483
A slight explanation,
Colonel Hogan, about last night.
338
00:14:59,525 --> 00:15:01,777
You know, I feel worse
than you do about that.
339
00:15:01,818 --> 00:15:03,320
Sit down. Sit down.
340
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,322
On your feet.
341
00:15:08,075 --> 00:15:10,786
Colonel Hogan, if you
do not feel worse
342
00:15:10,828 --> 00:15:12,621
than I do now, you will.
343
00:15:12,663 --> 00:15:14,832
I and my men were
out all night,
344
00:15:14,832 --> 00:15:16,458
and this morning,
345
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:19,002
the man you reported
missing was still here.
346
00:15:19,044 --> 00:15:20,838
You know, I think
we were even one over.
347
00:15:20,879 --> 00:15:23,131
Enough of your
American jokes.
348
00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:26,844
Punishment shall be meted out
to all prisoners.
349
00:15:26,885 --> 00:15:28,846
All prisoners?
350
00:15:28,846 --> 00:15:30,848
All prisoners.
351
00:15:30,889 --> 00:15:33,517
Then you will not be so popular,
Colonel Hogan.
352
00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:35,978
Oh, they're going to hate me,
all right, sir,
353
00:15:36,019 --> 00:15:37,521
but I've just got to learn.
354
00:15:37,521 --> 00:15:38,939
The usual punishment?
355
00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:41,358
Yes. The prisoners'
recreation hall
356
00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:43,569
will be padlocked for one week.
357
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:45,654
You're a hard man, Colonel.
358
00:15:45,696 --> 00:15:47,030
But just.
359
00:15:47,197 --> 00:15:48,782
Uh, anything else?
360
00:15:48,824 --> 00:15:53,662
Colonel Hogan, last night,
just at roll call,
361
00:15:53,704 --> 00:15:56,957
a Tiger tank entered the camp.
362
00:15:56,999 --> 00:15:58,876
Tiger tank?
Was that a Tiger tank?
363
00:15:58,876 --> 00:16:00,377
Hey, that's beautiful.
364
00:16:00,419 --> 00:16:02,838
My compliments
to the General Staff, sir.
365
00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:06,008
Danke. And, during your search,
Colonel Hogan,
366
00:16:06,049 --> 00:16:09,011
did you happen to see
what gate it went out of?
367
00:16:10,888 --> 00:16:12,973
It did go out a gate, didn't it?
368
00:16:13,015 --> 00:16:15,100
We were all locked
in our barracks, sir.
369
00:16:15,142 --> 00:16:18,145
Couldn't you have looked
through a window?
370
00:16:18,187 --> 00:16:21,481
Herr Kommandant, General
Hofstader is on the phone.
371
00:16:21,523 --> 00:16:23,817
General Hofstader?
Hofstader?
372
00:16:23,859 --> 00:16:26,695
Commander,
Third Panzer Division.
373
00:16:26,737 --> 00:16:28,363
Hofstader!
374
00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:31,074
General Hofstader, how
nice to hear from you.
375
00:16:31,116 --> 00:16:33,327
I... Tank?
376
00:16:34,703 --> 00:16:36,455
Didn't it come back?
377
00:16:38,332 --> 00:16:41,543
I assure you, General Hofstader,
I never sent for one.
378
00:16:41,585 --> 00:16:44,546
I had nothing to do with it,
General Hofstader. I...
379
00:16:45,589 --> 00:16:47,090
Where is it now?
380
00:16:49,551 --> 00:16:51,470
Well, you see,
General Hofstader,
381
00:16:51,512 --> 00:16:52,930
it was here last night,
382
00:16:52,930 --> 00:16:54,515
and then we had an escape,
383
00:16:54,556 --> 00:16:56,558
except it wasn't
really an escape,
384
00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:59,436
and when we came to look
for the tank, well, it, uh...
385
00:17:01,355 --> 00:17:03,815
Nasty tempers, those Panzers.
386
00:17:05,859 --> 00:17:07,319
No, General Hofstader.
387
00:17:07,361 --> 00:17:09,947
There's no need for you
to come here, General Hofstader.
388
00:17:09,988 --> 00:17:12,491
The tank will be found
immediately, General Hofstader.
389
00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:14,451
Jawohl, General Hofstader!
390
00:17:17,704 --> 00:17:19,289
Lose a tank?
391
00:17:19,331 --> 00:17:21,917
If the tank did
not leave the camp,
392
00:17:21,959 --> 00:17:23,585
then it is
still here.
393
00:17:23,627 --> 00:17:24,837
If it is still here,
394
00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:26,547
your men may
have hidden it.
395
00:17:26,588 --> 00:17:28,382
Now, we will
search this camp,
396
00:17:28,423 --> 00:17:30,467
inch by inch,
barracks by barracks,
397
00:17:30,509 --> 00:17:32,135
prisoner by prisoner.
398
00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:34,638
Colonel Klink, now,
just where do you think
399
00:17:34,638 --> 00:17:36,598
we might have hidden
a Tiger tank?
400
00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:40,018
It is impossible for you
to hide a Tiger tank.
401
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:41,979
Therefore, I suspect you.
402
00:17:42,020 --> 00:17:44,064
Dismissed.
403
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:45,524
Don't worry,
404
00:17:45,566 --> 00:17:47,651
I think it'll
show up somewhere.
405
00:17:49,903 --> 00:17:52,322
Can't you make
a phone tap off Klink's office
406
00:17:52,322 --> 00:17:54,491
out of something
besides my coffee pot?
407
00:17:54,533 --> 00:17:55,993
Aw, tais-toi.
408
00:17:56,034 --> 00:17:57,494
Aw, tais-toi!Tais-toi to you!
409
00:17:59,705 --> 00:18:01,540
Oh, General Hofstader
is on the way, Colonel.
410
00:18:01,582 --> 00:18:02,791
He'll be here
in a few minutes.
411
00:18:02,833 --> 00:18:04,668
I guess we'd better
give back the tank.
412
00:18:04,710 --> 00:18:06,336
Newkirk, get over
to the rec hall.
413
00:18:06,336 --> 00:18:07,337
It's all set to go.
414
00:18:07,337 --> 00:18:08,463
Jawohl, mein Colonel.
415
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:09,715
Knock off
the phony accent.
416
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:11,842
All right,
Governor.
417
00:18:16,180 --> 00:18:18,015
For your inspection, Colonel.
418
00:18:18,015 --> 00:18:19,516
Worst job we
ever did,
419
00:18:19,558 --> 00:18:20,851
but the blueprints
are all in.
420
00:18:20,851 --> 00:18:22,895
Got some fatigues
to go over that for roll call?
421
00:18:22,936 --> 00:18:24,062
Right here,
Colonel.
422
00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:25,063
Let's get 'em on her.
423
00:18:25,105 --> 00:18:26,523
Roll call's any minute now.
424
00:18:26,523 --> 00:18:27,941
Well, uh, good luck, now.
425
00:18:28,066 --> 00:18:29,985
Thank you, Sergeant.
426
00:18:32,154 --> 00:18:34,323
LeBeau:
Well, be careful, huh?
427
00:18:34,364 --> 00:18:36,241
Merci.
428
00:18:40,746 --> 00:18:42,080
Here, let me help you...
429
00:18:42,122 --> 00:18:43,540
I can manage,
thank you.
430
00:18:48,170 --> 00:18:49,463
I am sorry if my
431
00:18:49,505 --> 00:18:50,672
being a woman
432
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:52,716
has made things difficult
for you.
433
00:18:52,716 --> 00:18:54,885
Difficult?
434
00:18:54,927 --> 00:18:56,970
For your plans.
435
00:18:57,012 --> 00:18:59,431
Oh, yeah, sure.
436
00:19:02,392 --> 00:19:04,269
Colonel Hogan...
437
00:19:07,147 --> 00:19:08,565
it is not likely
438
00:19:08,565 --> 00:19:11,652
that we will ever
see each other again,
439
00:19:11,693 --> 00:19:13,737
so we can be frank, no?
440
00:19:13,779 --> 00:19:16,198
No. Oh, yeah, yeah.
441
00:19:18,534 --> 00:19:20,494
I volunteered
to come here,
442
00:19:20,536 --> 00:19:22,830
because in the
underground
443
00:19:22,871 --> 00:19:27,084
I heard many things
about your operation here.
444
00:19:27,084 --> 00:19:29,002
We know that you
could escape,
445
00:19:29,044 --> 00:19:30,754
but you choose
to stay behind
446
00:19:30,796 --> 00:19:32,422
and help the others.
447
00:19:32,422 --> 00:19:37,010
And I was curious--
448
00:19:37,052 --> 00:19:39,805
curious, as a woman--
449
00:19:39,847 --> 00:19:41,849
about the man
in charge.
450
00:19:41,890 --> 00:19:44,351
And now I have seen.
451
00:19:44,393 --> 00:19:46,854
( bell rings )
452
00:19:48,105 --> 00:19:50,232
Um, roll call?
453
00:19:50,274 --> 00:19:53,110
Roll call.
454
00:19:56,655 --> 00:19:58,782
Roll call, Colonel.
455
00:20:02,578 --> 00:20:04,246
Roll call, Colonel.
456
00:20:25,100 --> 00:20:26,935
General Hofstader,
457
00:20:26,977 --> 00:20:29,146
how nice to see you.
458
00:20:29,188 --> 00:20:32,107
Where is my tank, Klink?
459
00:20:32,149 --> 00:20:35,152
Didn't it come back yet?
460
00:20:35,152 --> 00:20:38,864
Klink, I released a tank to you
461
00:20:38,906 --> 00:20:42,159
to put down a riot
by prisoners.
462
00:20:42,201 --> 00:20:44,328
I see no riot.
463
00:20:44,328 --> 00:20:47,206
I see no tank.
464
00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:49,750
All I see is a colonel
465
00:20:49,791 --> 00:20:52,836
about to become corporal.
466
00:20:52,836 --> 00:20:54,087
But, General Hofstader,
467
00:20:54,129 --> 00:20:55,589
we searched the grounds,
468
00:20:55,631 --> 00:20:57,966
the barracks, the prisoners...
469
00:20:58,008 --> 00:20:59,760
The prisoners?
470
00:20:59,801 --> 00:21:02,513
No one had it in his pocket?
471
00:21:04,139 --> 00:21:07,768
We are talking
about a Tiger tank, Klink,
472
00:21:07,809 --> 00:21:09,853
not a toy dump truck!
473
00:21:16,485 --> 00:21:18,820
Please, Colonel,
you push me too far.
474
00:21:18,862 --> 00:21:20,113
What's the
matter, Schultz?
475
00:21:20,155 --> 00:21:21,532
All 15 not here?
476
00:21:21,573 --> 00:21:23,951
15 are here,
but it is not Newkirk.
477
00:21:23,992 --> 00:21:25,994
It doesn't even look
like Newkirk
478
00:21:26,036 --> 00:21:28,497
in any important respect.
479
00:21:28,539 --> 00:21:30,207
Really?
480
00:21:30,207 --> 00:21:31,917
Oh, please, Colonel Hogan,
481
00:21:31,959 --> 00:21:34,253
I do not want to interfere
in your private life,
482
00:21:34,294 --> 00:21:35,671
but I must insist...
483
00:21:35,712 --> 00:21:37,673
Schultz, you
have my word--
484
00:21:37,714 --> 00:21:39,800
Newkirk will be here...
485
00:21:39,842 --> 00:21:42,344
any time now.
486
00:21:42,386 --> 00:21:43,554
General Hofstader,
487
00:21:43,554 --> 00:21:44,721
it will not
be necessary
488
00:21:44,763 --> 00:21:46,765
for you to report
this to Berlin.
489
00:21:46,807 --> 00:21:48,851
The tank will turn
up any time now.
490
00:21:50,477 --> 00:21:52,229
( engine starting )
491
00:21:52,271 --> 00:21:54,940
( engine revving )
492
00:22:02,739 --> 00:22:04,700
You see, I told you
it would turn up.
493
00:22:12,082 --> 00:22:14,001
Now, where did
that come from?
494
00:22:14,042 --> 00:22:17,796
I see nothing, nothing!
495
00:22:20,716 --> 00:22:22,759
( men shouting )
496
00:22:25,888 --> 00:22:28,765
It is attacking!
497
00:22:28,765 --> 00:22:31,810
( men shouting )
498
00:22:31,852 --> 00:22:32,936
This is General Hofstader.
499
00:22:35,022 --> 00:22:37,149
Halt! Halt!
500
00:22:41,612 --> 00:22:44,406
Get inside...
Get inside that tank!
501
00:22:46,408 --> 00:22:48,118
It's about the biggest diversion
we can make.
502
00:22:48,327 --> 00:22:50,287
You better be going.
503
00:22:54,124 --> 00:22:55,292
Colonel Hogan!
504
00:22:55,292 --> 00:22:57,044
Colonel Hogan!
505
00:22:57,085 --> 00:23:00,255
Kissing prisoners is verboten!
506
00:23:03,008 --> 00:23:05,260
Au revoir.
507
00:23:12,518 --> 00:23:14,478
Anything happening?
508
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:16,230
Nothing, Schultz.
509
00:23:16,271 --> 00:23:20,317
Just the dull, deadly routine
of prison life.
510
00:23:20,317 --> 00:23:22,986
( men cheering )
511
00:23:24,446 --> 00:23:27,199
Oh, boy.
512
00:23:32,788 --> 00:23:34,873
Colonel...
513
00:23:41,839 --> 00:23:43,799
Now, we've had some
strange occurrences
514
00:23:43,841 --> 00:23:46,426
in this camp, very
strange occurrences.
515
00:23:46,468 --> 00:23:48,345
We have?
Yes.
516
00:23:48,387 --> 00:23:50,347
Can you suggest an explanation?
517
00:23:50,347 --> 00:23:51,306
The Gestapo.
518
00:23:51,348 --> 00:23:53,141
The Gestapo?
519
00:23:53,183 --> 00:23:55,185
Colonel Klink,
you've never had an escape
520
00:23:55,185 --> 00:23:56,478
at Stalag 13.
521
00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:58,564
That's a record
not even the Gestapo can match.
522
00:23:58,856 --> 00:24:00,065
True, but I-I...
523
00:24:00,107 --> 00:24:02,276
It's a plot
to discredit you in Berlin.
524
00:24:02,317 --> 00:24:03,277
But why?
525
00:24:03,318 --> 00:24:04,820
Your efficiency
is showing them up!
526
00:24:04,862 --> 00:24:06,363
No!
527
00:24:06,405 --> 00:24:07,197
You have a better theory?
528
00:24:08,657 --> 00:24:09,783
This is incredible.
529
00:24:09,825 --> 00:24:11,034
What can I do?
530
00:24:11,034 --> 00:24:14,079
Well, perhaps
one of these days
531
00:24:15,706 --> 00:24:18,292
we might just be able
to arrange an escape.
532
00:24:18,333 --> 00:24:21,545
Nothing big-- 15, 20 men?
533
00:24:21,587 --> 00:24:24,214
Do you realize
that what you are suggesting,
534
00:24:24,214 --> 00:24:25,799
Colonel Hogan, is treason?
535
00:24:25,841 --> 00:24:27,843
See? You're too perfect.
536
00:24:29,553 --> 00:24:32,472
That's why they hate you.
537
00:24:32,514 --> 00:24:33,891
For after dinner.
538
00:24:33,941 --> 00:24:38,491
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