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1
00:00:43,845 --> 00:00:47,346
[MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:02:19,073 --> 00:02:22,208
Peter, what have you done?
3
00:02:32,219 --> 00:02:33,720
Do you want to hear
a Christmas story?
4
00:02:49,369 --> 00:02:52,873
[LAUGHTER]
5
00:03:05,318 --> 00:03:07,053
Oh, Chloe.
6
00:03:07,055 --> 00:03:08,554
What do you think you're doing?
7
00:03:08,556 --> 00:03:10,556
I saw a Santa, Toby.
8
00:03:10,558 --> 00:03:11,557
Really?
9
00:03:11,559 --> 00:03:12,925
Yeah, he was in the drive.
10
00:03:12,927 --> 00:03:14,026
I saw him with his friends.
11
00:03:14,028 --> 00:03:15,027
You were just dreaming.
12
00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:16,128
Go back to sleep.
13
00:03:16,130 --> 00:03:17,563
Please, Toby, come and look.
14
00:03:17,565 --> 00:03:18,864
Go away.
15
00:03:18,866 --> 00:03:20,534
Please, Toby, come look.
16
00:03:22,402 --> 00:03:24,402
So annoying.
17
00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:27,372
Yeah, the kids are asleep.
18
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:29,274
And we're looking
forward to seeing you,
19
00:03:29,276 --> 00:03:31,209
but Toby's probably going to
be too busy with his new killer
20
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:34,780
elf game.
21
00:03:34,782 --> 00:03:36,717
Yeah, Chloe's going
to love her new doll.
22
00:03:39,554 --> 00:03:42,588
You know Sean, he's anything.
23
00:03:42,590 --> 00:03:46,125
Do you need us to
bring anything with us?
24
00:03:46,127 --> 00:03:47,960
OK, well, if you're sure.
25
00:03:47,962 --> 00:03:48,761
See you tomorrow, mom.
26
00:03:48,763 --> 00:03:49,327
Love you.
27
00:03:49,329 --> 00:03:50,997
Bye.
28
00:03:54,102 --> 00:03:56,202
See, no one's there.
29
00:03:56,204 --> 00:03:57,871
But I saw them.
30
00:04:00,541 --> 00:04:02,508
You were just dreaming.
31
00:04:02,510 --> 00:04:05,979
(DOG BARKING)
32
00:04:12,687 --> 00:04:14,821
Rufus, shut up or I'll
chop your balls off.
33
00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,260
I swear I saw him.
34
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:24,663
He was with an
elf and a snowman.
35
00:04:24,665 --> 00:04:27,833
I'm sure he was, but you're
not supposed to see Santa,
36
00:04:27,835 --> 00:04:30,036
so don't let him know, or
he'll take all your presents.
37
00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:42,014
Polly, close the window.
38
00:04:42,016 --> 00:04:43,583
It's cold.
39
00:05:01,936 --> 00:05:04,302
[LAUGHTER]
40
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,972
Dad.
41
00:05:17,985 --> 00:05:19,819
Dad.
42
00:05:19,821 --> 00:05:21,453
It's a terrible Santa costume.
43
00:05:58,559 --> 00:06:02,761
I'm your snowman, short and fat.
44
00:06:02,763 --> 00:06:06,497
Here's my scarf
and here's my hat.
45
00:06:06,499 --> 00:06:09,102
When I see the
snowfall, hear me shout.
46
00:06:14,075 --> 00:06:16,776
All the little children
please come out.
47
00:06:24,785 --> 00:06:26,418
Santa.
48
00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:33,659
You don't look like I
thought you would, Santa.
49
00:06:33,661 --> 00:06:35,494
Did you have an accident?
50
00:06:39,267 --> 00:06:41,233
Yes, little girl.
51
00:06:41,235 --> 00:06:45,771
Santa had a very bad
accident this year.
52
00:06:45,773 --> 00:06:47,806
Did your sleigh crash?
53
00:06:47,808 --> 00:06:49,676
Are your reindeer OK?
54
00:06:52,713 --> 00:06:54,445
What's your name?
55
00:06:54,447 --> 00:06:56,082
Chloe.
56
00:07:02,189 --> 00:07:05,257
Would you like a present, Chloe?
57
00:07:05,259 --> 00:07:06,960
Yes please, Santa.
58
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:16,669
This belonged to another
little girl's house
59
00:07:16,671 --> 00:07:19,738
that I visited.
60
00:07:19,740 --> 00:07:22,608
Would you want
bunny like a friend?
61
00:07:22,610 --> 00:07:24,177
Yes, please, Santa.
62
00:07:29,817 --> 00:07:32,551
Would you like a
special present, Chloe?
63
00:07:32,553 --> 00:07:36,155
Yes, please, Santa.
64
00:07:36,157 --> 00:07:42,628
Would you and your brother
want to come on that ride
65
00:07:42,630 --> 00:07:44,830
to the North Pole?
66
00:07:44,832 --> 00:07:45,531
Really?
67
00:07:45,533 --> 00:07:47,933
Yes.
68
00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:52,137
You can come and see all the
fun we have in our workshops
69
00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:56,442
with the other little
girls and boys.
70
00:07:56,444 --> 00:07:59,980
[LAUGHTER]
71
00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:13,225
The presence must be
around here somewhere.
72
00:08:13,227 --> 00:08:15,027
Harriet, your dad's
going to catch us.
73
00:08:15,029 --> 00:08:16,628
Did you know the family
who used to live here
74
00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,430
got killed on Christmas Eve?
75
00:08:18,432 --> 00:08:20,567
Really?
76
00:08:20,569 --> 00:08:21,568
Yeah, they never found the girl.
77
00:08:21,570 --> 00:08:23,237
Hi.
78
00:08:24,706 --> 00:08:28,108
I'm back home.
79
00:08:28,110 --> 00:08:29,609
I bought a bigger
tree than we used to.
80
00:08:29,611 --> 00:08:32,512
[SCREAMS]
81
00:08:32,514 --> 00:08:35,515
[LAUGHTER]
82
00:08:35,517 --> 00:08:37,684
Mr Red, I have
two new playmates.
83
00:08:37,686 --> 00:08:41,287
It's time for some fun.
84
00:08:41,289 --> 00:08:44,825
[LAUGHTER]
85
00:08:51,533 --> 00:08:53,833
Hello.
86
00:08:53,835 --> 00:08:56,137
We've had a call about
a domestic disturbance.
87
00:08:58,407 --> 00:08:59,940
Is anyone home?
88
00:09:01,643 --> 00:09:03,177
Nice house.
89
00:09:16,491 --> 00:09:18,125
Fuck.
90
00:09:22,297 --> 00:09:23,931
Great first
Christmas on the beat.
91
00:09:28,003 --> 00:09:30,603
Yeah, well, it's
going to be a long one.
92
00:09:30,605 --> 00:09:31,838
While you doing area
search down here,
93
00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:33,239
I'll do the same upstairs.
94
00:09:33,241 --> 00:09:37,410
(SINGING) The stars
in the bright sky
95
00:09:37,412 --> 00:09:40,548
look down where he lay.
96
00:09:40,550 --> 00:09:42,015
Sounds like a girl.
97
00:09:42,017 --> 00:09:48,923
(SINGING) The little Lord
Jesus asleep on the hay.
98
00:09:53,228 --> 00:10:00,935
The stars in the bright sky
looked down where he lay.
99
00:10:01,269 --> 00:10:09,210
The little Lord Jesus
asleep on the hay.
100
00:10:10,479 --> 00:10:18,152
The stars in the bright sky look
down where lay, the little Lord.
101
00:10:21,423 --> 00:10:27,227
Jesus asleep on the hay.
102
00:10:27,229 --> 00:10:33,633
Hey, you OK?
103
00:10:33,635 --> 00:10:35,468
Of course, I'm OK, silly.
104
00:10:35,470 --> 00:10:39,205
It's Christmas.
105
00:10:39,207 --> 00:10:41,641
How do you come
to join our party?
106
00:10:41,643 --> 00:10:43,343
Come on.
107
00:10:43,345 --> 00:10:44,210
Come out here with me.
108
00:10:44,212 --> 00:10:45,445
Why?
109
00:10:45,447 --> 00:10:47,647
Where are we going?
110
00:10:47,649 --> 00:10:50,049
Somewhere safe.
111
00:10:50,051 --> 00:10:53,119
I'm always safe with Mr. Red.
112
00:10:53,121 --> 00:10:54,487
Mr. Red.
113
00:10:54,489 --> 00:11:00,860
Yes, he's the ghost
of Christmas future.
114
00:11:00,862 --> 00:11:02,996
Christmas future?
115
00:11:02,998 --> 00:11:04,798
He knows when
everyone's going to die.
116
00:11:09,037 --> 00:11:10,703
Ray.
117
00:11:10,705 --> 00:11:12,373
Ray.
118
00:11:16,011 --> 00:11:18,311
It's the season to be jolly.
119
00:11:18,313 --> 00:11:21,448
[LAUGHTER]
120
00:11:32,460 --> 00:11:35,563
Oh, what the fuck.
121
00:11:35,565 --> 00:11:39,066
[LAUGHTER]
122
00:11:41,169 --> 00:11:43,571
I think it's time for
the Christmas Holly.
123
00:11:43,573 --> 00:11:44,971
Wait. Wait.
124
00:11:44,973 --> 00:11:45,673
Wait, no, no, no, no, no.
125
00:11:45,675 --> 00:11:46,674
Wait.
126
00:11:46,676 --> 00:11:48,408
Wait, no, no.
127
00:11:48,410 --> 00:11:56,984
[SCREAMS]
128
00:12:05,827 --> 00:12:08,428
Wakey wakey.
129
00:12:08,430 --> 00:12:10,231
Did you like the
Christmas decorations?
130
00:12:13,835 --> 00:12:16,135
The fuck's going on?
131
00:12:16,137 --> 00:12:18,371
Mr. Red is making things
ready for Christmas.
132
00:12:18,373 --> 00:12:21,908
Please help me.
133
00:12:21,910 --> 00:12:23,711
Mr. Red is helping you, silly.
134
00:12:23,713 --> 00:12:25,613
Wait.
135
00:12:25,615 --> 00:12:28,682
I recognize you.
136
00:12:28,684 --> 00:12:31,985
You're the girl that we're
missing five years ago.
137
00:12:31,987 --> 00:12:32,752
Her name is Chloe.
138
00:12:32,754 --> 00:12:35,855
Yes, that's me.
139
00:12:35,857 --> 00:12:37,524
What happened to you?
140
00:12:37,526 --> 00:12:40,493
I made new friends.
141
00:12:40,495 --> 00:12:44,397
I still see my family from time
to time, especially my brother,
142
00:12:44,399 --> 00:12:45,799
like a Christmas ghost.
143
00:12:51,306 --> 00:12:54,240
We had so much fun with the
family of this house this year.
144
00:12:54,242 --> 00:12:57,411
[LAUGHTER]
145
00:12:59,047 --> 00:13:02,482
Those arrested, killed
together, stay together.
146
00:13:02,484 --> 00:13:05,853
[LAUGHTER]
147
00:13:11,326 --> 00:13:13,059
Please.
148
00:13:13,061 --> 00:13:16,530
Are you ready for
some festive fun, Chloe.
149
00:13:16,532 --> 00:13:19,866
Mr. Red has a very
fun surprise for you.
150
00:13:19,868 --> 00:13:21,535
What are you doing?
151
00:13:21,537 --> 00:13:22,703
Do you like lighting
the Christmas pudding?
152
00:13:22,705 --> 00:13:24,070
Petrol.
153
00:13:24,072 --> 00:13:25,739
So much better than brandy.
154
00:13:25,741 --> 00:13:29,276
[LAUGHTER]
155
00:13:41,890 --> 00:13:45,491
Please, don't do it, please.
156
00:13:45,493 --> 00:13:47,561
Don't do it.
157
00:13:47,563 --> 00:13:50,998
[SCREAMING]
158
00:13:57,339 --> 00:14:01,908
And this was a very dull
Mr. Red gave to her right
159
00:14:01,910 --> 00:14:04,444
before they took a trip with all
the dead bodies in the sleigh
160
00:14:04,446 --> 00:14:06,113
van.
161
00:14:07,882 --> 00:14:10,984
[LAUGHTER]
162
00:14:16,759 --> 00:14:17,624
Sleigh van.
163
00:14:17,626 --> 00:14:19,392
Oh, yeah.
164
00:14:19,394 --> 00:14:22,195
Diesel is more
efficient than reindeer,
165
00:14:22,197 --> 00:14:25,932
and you can get more dead bodies
in a white van, especially
166
00:14:25,934 --> 00:14:26,834
kids.
167
00:14:26,836 --> 00:14:28,267
Smaller.
168
00:14:28,269 --> 00:14:30,303
What happened to the girl?
169
00:14:30,305 --> 00:14:32,972
She went into child care.
170
00:14:32,974 --> 00:14:36,008
If you can call it that.
171
00:14:36,010 --> 00:14:38,144
Strikes me she'd have
been less dysfunctional
172
00:14:38,146 --> 00:14:40,814
if she'd stayed with the
three escaped serial killers.
173
00:14:40,816 --> 00:14:45,218
Why were they dressed as
a Santa, elf, and snowman?
174
00:14:45,220 --> 00:14:52,058
Mr. Red was a jolly arsonist
who burnt down workshops.
175
00:14:52,060 --> 00:14:56,195
Mr. Green was a terrorist who
mailed out Christmas crackers
176
00:14:56,197 --> 00:14:58,298
filled with explosives.
177
00:15:01,302 --> 00:15:06,272
And Mr. White, well,
he froze people
178
00:15:06,274 --> 00:15:09,777
to eat for Christmas dinner.
179
00:15:09,779 --> 00:15:12,780
How did they all escape at once?
180
00:15:12,782 --> 00:15:16,884
Idiots put them all on the
same ward, nicknamed them
181
00:15:16,886 --> 00:15:21,320
the three Christmas nutters,
although they seriously
182
00:15:21,322 --> 00:15:23,122
underestimated the effectiveness
of a Christmas tree
183
00:15:23,124 --> 00:15:25,458
as a battering ram.
184
00:15:25,460 --> 00:15:27,460
Jesus Christ.
185
00:15:27,462 --> 00:15:29,128
Oh, no.
186
00:15:29,130 --> 00:15:31,164
She never spoke to him.
187
00:15:31,166 --> 00:15:32,999
Funny, really.
188
00:15:33,001 --> 00:15:35,602
Whole festival dedicated
to his birthday,
189
00:15:35,604 --> 00:15:38,304
and all anyone ever wants
to do is write to me.
190
00:15:38,306 --> 00:15:40,973
The poor fucker was
on a cross, died,
191
00:15:40,975 --> 00:15:42,709
and all they want
is fucking presents.
192
00:15:42,711 --> 00:15:45,112
I've got enough fucking
work to do at Christmas.
193
00:15:50,653 --> 00:15:55,221
Anyway, bloody Christmas.
194
00:15:55,223 --> 00:15:56,022
Now what else have
I got in here?
195
00:15:56,024 --> 00:15:58,090
Oh, yeah.
196
00:15:58,092 --> 00:16:02,830
Now this is my new
Teddy bear design.
197
00:16:02,832 --> 00:16:04,598
What do you think?
198
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:07,301
I call him cuddles.
199
00:16:09,772 --> 00:16:12,639
What happened to him?
200
00:16:12,641 --> 00:16:20,280
Yeah, I think the elf in the
workshop may have had issues.
201
00:16:21,717 --> 00:16:23,717
Reminds me of another
bloke I know had issues.
202
00:16:23,719 --> 00:16:27,688
I tell you what, I could
tell you a story about him
203
00:16:27,690 --> 00:16:29,189
that would cheer you up.
204
00:16:34,864 --> 00:16:37,531
He looks all right.
205
00:16:37,533 --> 00:16:42,669
That is because
this is Dr. White.
206
00:16:42,671 --> 00:16:44,672
You wait until you
meet his counterpart.
207
00:16:48,443 --> 00:16:53,112
This is a little festive tale I
like to call the Ventriloquist.
208
00:16:53,114 --> 00:16:55,215
Who Stole Christmas.
209
00:16:58,687 --> 00:17:03,122
So why did the man only
wear one boot to town?
210
00:17:03,124 --> 00:17:06,260
Because the weather forecast
only gave 50% chance of snow.
211
00:17:10,298 --> 00:17:12,365
Hey, do you know frosty
the snowman reminds
212
00:17:12,367 --> 00:17:13,534
me of my dad, Dr. White?
213
00:17:13,536 --> 00:17:15,234
Why?
214
00:17:15,236 --> 00:17:17,771
Because he used to buy
you lots of slush puppies?
215
00:17:17,773 --> 00:17:21,174
No, because he said
he'd come back one day.
216
00:17:26,982 --> 00:17:31,018
I had a threesome with
two princesses yesterday.
217
00:17:31,020 --> 00:17:32,251
That's disgusting, Dr. White.
218
00:17:32,253 --> 00:17:33,486
Why are you telling me that?
219
00:17:33,488 --> 00:17:38,257
Because you told
me to let it go.
220
00:17:38,259 --> 00:17:39,993
Not like that, I didn't.
221
00:17:39,995 --> 00:17:41,962
If you carry on like that,
they'll put you on a list.
222
00:17:41,964 --> 00:17:44,130
What sort of list?
223
00:17:44,132 --> 00:17:45,899
A. Very naughty list.
224
00:17:45,901 --> 00:17:48,167
Cool.
225
00:17:48,169 --> 00:17:51,905
Well, I know where all the
naughty girls are like Santa.
226
00:17:51,907 --> 00:17:53,874
No, not like Santa.
227
00:17:53,876 --> 00:17:55,976
Cool.
228
00:17:55,978 --> 00:18:01,447
Do you know why Santa
doesn't have any kids?
229
00:18:01,449 --> 00:18:04,384
Because he only
comes once a year.
230
00:18:06,454 --> 00:18:07,453
Right.
231
00:18:07,455 --> 00:18:09,723
Well, I think we've seen enough.
232
00:18:09,725 --> 00:18:11,223
Mr. White.
233
00:18:11,225 --> 00:18:13,192
Don't call us.
234
00:18:13,194 --> 00:18:17,798
Well, don't call us.
235
00:18:17,800 --> 00:18:20,166
Did you not like it?
236
00:18:20,168 --> 00:18:21,935
It's not quite
what we're looking
237
00:18:21,937 --> 00:18:24,303
for for this year's outbound
for the elderly Christmas
238
00:18:24,305 --> 00:18:26,039
variety show.
239
00:18:26,041 --> 00:18:28,207
This is Margate.
240
00:18:28,209 --> 00:18:29,576
Hey, maybe you should
head to Brighton.
241
00:18:29,578 --> 00:18:31,812
They like weird stuff there.
242
00:18:31,814 --> 00:18:36,115
Here they like virulent, happy
families, and warm coffins.
243
00:18:36,117 --> 00:18:39,218
Oh, I mean coffees.
244
00:18:39,220 --> 00:18:42,889
I can mix it up a bit and
make it a bit more progressive.
245
00:18:42,891 --> 00:18:46,492
I think you've progressed
as far as you can.
246
00:18:46,494 --> 00:18:49,128
Any more progressive I won't
have to call the police.
247
00:18:49,130 --> 00:18:51,565
It's all just a
bit, well, creepy.
248
00:18:51,567 --> 00:18:53,800
Well, Christmas is
all about a fat man
249
00:18:53,802 --> 00:18:56,135
climbing into people's homes
and little children's bedrooms.
250
00:18:56,137 --> 00:18:57,804
Quite, Dr. White.
251
00:18:57,806 --> 00:18:59,740
We've got lots of people
to see and your time is...
252
00:18:59,742 --> 00:19:02,943
Was up.
253
00:19:02,945 --> 00:19:05,512
Keep it on the down low, but
we've got a break dancing
254
00:19:05,514 --> 00:19:06,913
reindeer who got through
to the semi-finals
255
00:19:06,915 --> 00:19:08,482
of Britain's Got Talent.
256
00:19:14,957 --> 00:19:17,924
Hugo, we've got a problem.
257
00:19:17,926 --> 00:19:20,393
What is it, Leroy?
258
00:19:20,395 --> 00:19:22,129
It's Mrs. Crimpton.
259
00:19:22,131 --> 00:19:23,798
Oh, God.
260
00:19:26,434 --> 00:19:28,035
She turned up to do
her annual striptease.
261
00:19:28,037 --> 00:19:30,570
Oh, God.
262
00:19:30,572 --> 00:19:32,105
Has she escaped from
the hospital again?
263
00:19:32,107 --> 00:19:33,740
I think so.
264
00:19:33,742 --> 00:19:35,976
She's wearing one of those
gowns without the back in.
265
00:19:35,978 --> 00:19:37,645
Oh.
266
00:19:40,381 --> 00:19:42,181
Hello, Henry.
267
00:19:42,183 --> 00:19:44,619
Oh, you're looking tired.
268
00:19:48,691 --> 00:19:50,957
You are not auditioning him.
269
00:19:50,959 --> 00:19:52,859
Don't be like that, Henry.
270
00:19:52,861 --> 00:19:56,096
Nothing wrong with a bit
of healthy competition,
271
00:19:56,098 --> 00:20:00,033
although you are
getting on a bit.
272
00:20:00,035 --> 00:20:02,569
It's called experience.
273
00:20:02,571 --> 00:20:05,172
It's one way of putting it.
274
00:20:05,174 --> 00:20:09,142
And don't you think your act's
a little bit racist these days?
275
00:20:09,144 --> 00:20:13,113
I mean, Dr. White?
276
00:20:13,115 --> 00:20:15,582
I'm a snowman.
277
00:20:15,584 --> 00:20:17,784
That's a politically
incorrect snow
278
00:20:17,786 --> 00:20:23,156
person, unlike myself, Professor
Trueheart and Bobbin Buttons.
279
00:20:23,158 --> 00:20:25,224
You're a fucking cunt.
280
00:20:25,226 --> 00:20:26,159
What did you say?
281
00:20:26,161 --> 00:20:27,359
I said you're...
282
00:20:27,361 --> 00:20:29,563
Don't talk, Dr. White.
283
00:20:29,565 --> 00:20:33,100
Are you having another meltdown?
284
00:20:33,102 --> 00:20:36,036
Rehab not go well.
285
00:20:36,038 --> 00:20:37,971
He Stole my father's act.
286
00:20:37,973 --> 00:20:41,174
, Henry no one cares about
your father and his lame
287
00:20:41,176 --> 00:20:42,877
ass forgotten show in Norway.
288
00:20:48,584 --> 00:20:50,417
Don't talk about my father.
289
00:20:58,093 --> 00:20:59,960
As the lawyers told you, there's
290
00:20:59,962 --> 00:21:03,196
not a copyright on
Snowman, and Bobbins and I
291
00:21:03,198 --> 00:21:04,664
sell a lot better than you.
292
00:21:04,666 --> 00:21:06,867
I mean, let's face it.
293
00:21:06,869 --> 00:21:08,635
It's not like I've won
the children's award
294
00:21:08,637 --> 00:21:11,037
of Margate five years in a row.
295
00:21:11,039 --> 00:21:12,973
Oh, wait, that's a coincidence.
296
00:21:12,975 --> 00:21:13,774
I actually have.
297
00:21:13,776 --> 00:21:16,811
[LAUGHTER]
298
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:24,450
I could be as big as you,
but I've got principles.
299
00:21:24,452 --> 00:21:25,786
I've got a newsflash
for you, Henry.
300
00:21:25,788 --> 00:21:27,854
Wake up grandad.
301
00:21:27,856 --> 00:21:30,357
Your act is dead.
302
00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:41,034
For the love of God,
why are there two snowmen
303
00:21:41,036 --> 00:21:44,303
having a fight on
my fucking stage?
304
00:21:44,305 --> 00:21:48,910
Leroy, get them out of here
and fetch me a ginseng tea.
305
00:21:50,913 --> 00:21:52,646
Fuck.
306
00:21:52,648 --> 00:21:54,848
This, is Prancer the
reindeer breakdancer.
307
00:21:54,850 --> 00:21:56,149
Yeah, no shit.
308
00:21:56,151 --> 00:21:57,551
Hello.
309
00:21:57,553 --> 00:21:59,687
No, am I on stage now then or?
310
00:22:18,472 --> 00:22:20,372
Don't worry, Dr. White.
311
00:22:20,374 --> 00:22:21,575
You'll get the next job.
312
00:22:21,577 --> 00:22:23,077
Yes, we will.
313
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:26,848
Dr. White?
314
00:22:31,352 --> 00:22:32,319
These are those
Christmas adverts.
315
00:22:32,321 --> 00:22:34,386
Nah, man.
316
00:22:34,388 --> 00:22:36,388
It's the bad boy,
did the cookie adverts.
317
00:22:36,390 --> 00:22:39,060
Yeah, it's him.
318
00:22:43,632 --> 00:22:44,396
Come on, man.
319
00:22:44,398 --> 00:22:45,765
Cheer up.
320
00:22:45,767 --> 00:22:48,467
Yeah, it's Christmas.
321
00:22:48,469 --> 00:22:49,401
Yo, where's the puppet?
322
00:22:49,403 --> 00:22:52,940
[LAUGHTER]
323
00:23:14,263 --> 00:23:16,830
Fuck off.
324
00:23:16,832 --> 00:23:19,499
You want to see
the act, big man.
325
00:23:19,501 --> 00:23:22,369
Come on.
326
00:23:22,371 --> 00:23:25,572
Don't trouble, guys.
327
00:23:25,574 --> 00:23:27,574
Raise your festive
cheer, wacker.
328
00:23:27,576 --> 00:23:29,042
[MOCKING LAUGHTER]
329
00:23:29,044 --> 00:23:31,477
I'm Dr. White.
330
00:23:31,479 --> 00:23:33,213
What's that?
331
00:23:33,215 --> 00:23:34,446
Why don't you shut up?
332
00:23:34,448 --> 00:23:37,217
[GRUNTS]
333
00:23:37,219 --> 00:23:41,721
Man, oh, dear.
334
00:23:41,723 --> 00:23:43,624
We all know no English now.
335
00:23:54,603 --> 00:23:55,502
Come on, let's go.
336
00:23:55,504 --> 00:23:57,071
Let's go.
337
00:23:59,608 --> 00:24:01,809
[GROANING]
338
00:24:43,484 --> 00:24:45,886
Henry, what's
happened to your face?
339
00:24:48,790 --> 00:24:52,325
Tragic crowd surfing accident.
340
00:24:52,327 --> 00:24:54,928
Sarcasm doesn't help
with your problems.
341
00:24:54,930 --> 00:24:58,064
But what excuse do you
have for your face then?
342
00:24:58,066 --> 00:25:00,867
And I thought we agreed no
more puppets at our meetings.
343
00:25:00,869 --> 00:25:02,871
He's having a sudden act.
344
00:25:05,842 --> 00:25:08,242
Do you want to tell me
what happened at the school?
345
00:25:08,244 --> 00:25:12,213
And that's why there'll be
no snow in Africa this year
346
00:25:12,215 --> 00:25:14,215
because of your parents.
347
00:25:14,217 --> 00:25:15,883
But how are we
supposed to get anywhere
348
00:25:15,885 --> 00:25:17,284
if we can't use planes?
349
00:25:17,286 --> 00:25:18,486
Swim.
350
00:25:18,488 --> 00:25:20,721
I can't swim to Disneyland.
351
00:25:20,723 --> 00:25:22,823
Think of the Dolphins.
352
00:25:22,825 --> 00:25:23,991
Fuck the Dolphins.
353
00:25:23,993 --> 00:25:25,292
Oh, shut up, you little...
354
00:25:25,294 --> 00:25:27,561
Cunt.
355
00:25:27,563 --> 00:25:30,598
Conservation Under
National Threat.
356
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:33,502
Exactly.
357
00:25:33,504 --> 00:25:38,105
I wasn't swearing.
358
00:25:38,107 --> 00:25:40,608
Is it any wonder
you lost the job?
359
00:25:40,610 --> 00:25:42,343
Don't start that again.
360
00:25:42,345 --> 00:25:44,378
It's not funny.
361
00:25:44,380 --> 00:25:48,282
Apparently, I'm not
that funny anymore.
362
00:25:48,284 --> 00:25:50,317
Going around teaching
global warming to kids.
363
00:25:50,319 --> 00:25:56,123
Seriously, who cares
if the ice caps melt?
364
00:25:56,125 --> 00:25:59,226
And why is it you're
teaching to year-sevens?
365
00:25:59,228 --> 00:26:02,930
Because my co-worker got
caught doing cocaine, shooting
366
00:26:02,932 --> 00:26:07,134
snow sprinkled cookie adverts.
367
00:26:07,136 --> 00:26:10,838
Well, the official line
is you had a breakdown,
368
00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:12,907
the company didn't
want to get sued,
369
00:26:12,909 --> 00:26:15,510
and what with all the kids
on set and the snowman
370
00:26:15,512 --> 00:26:19,747
snorting all the snow, but
yes, it's not a good look
371
00:26:19,749 --> 00:26:21,316
for a children's entertainer.
372
00:26:24,153 --> 00:26:26,887
That's all I am
to you, isn't it?
373
00:26:26,889 --> 00:26:30,458
A children's entertainer.
374
00:26:30,460 --> 00:26:32,593
And I can't even get a
job in Southern Panto.
375
00:26:32,595 --> 00:26:35,564
Henry, I am not your agent.
376
00:26:35,566 --> 00:26:36,997
I am your therapist.
377
00:26:36,999 --> 00:26:40,601
Yeah, so you keep reminding me.
378
00:26:40,603 --> 00:26:43,304
I can't get one
of those anymore.
379
00:26:43,306 --> 00:26:48,642
Maybe it's a good idea to
think about another career.
380
00:26:48,644 --> 00:26:50,911
Get out of the
ventriloquist business.
381
00:26:50,913 --> 00:26:52,746
It could do you good.
382
00:26:52,748 --> 00:26:53,647
What would the memory
of your father...
383
00:26:53,649 --> 00:26:55,483
Don't say it.
384
00:26:55,485 --> 00:26:58,353
Don't mention my father.
385
00:27:02,091 --> 00:27:04,826
You always have to twist it
round back to my childhood.
386
00:27:07,598 --> 00:27:11,265
You need to bury the past.
387
00:27:11,267 --> 00:27:17,638
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
388
00:27:17,640 --> 00:27:19,774
What are you saying now?
389
00:27:23,346 --> 00:27:25,147
He said you're
being very helpful.
390
00:27:34,157 --> 00:27:36,023
Time's up.
391
00:27:36,025 --> 00:27:37,826
I'll see you next Friday,
without the puppet.
392
00:27:45,234 --> 00:27:46,601
It's time to go.
393
00:27:46,603 --> 00:27:47,536
He's going to be here soon.
394
00:27:47,538 --> 00:27:48,702
Who cares?
395
00:27:48,704 --> 00:27:49,703
You're leaving him anyway.
396
00:27:49,705 --> 00:27:50,971
I know.
397
00:27:50,973 --> 00:27:52,339
He's fucking weird in the head.
398
00:27:52,341 --> 00:27:53,374
Just like his dad then.
399
00:27:53,376 --> 00:27:54,942
Yeah.
400
00:27:54,944 --> 00:27:56,944
You know he doesn't
even talk to his mom.
401
00:27:56,946 --> 00:27:59,514
There's only
something off there.
402
00:27:59,516 --> 00:28:00,681
Forget about him.
403
00:28:00,683 --> 00:28:02,316
You don't get it, Brandon.
404
00:28:02,318 --> 00:28:04,118
His dad didn't just leave
him with that puppet.
405
00:28:04,120 --> 00:28:06,987
He left him with a
whole load of crazy.
406
00:28:06,989 --> 00:28:08,889
I can think of a lot better
things to do with my hands
407
00:28:08,891 --> 00:28:10,357
than play with a puppet.
408
00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:12,993
I'm sure you can.
409
00:28:12,995 --> 00:28:14,361
I dread to think what
he thinks about you.
410
00:28:14,363 --> 00:28:15,996
Oh, don't.
411
00:28:15,998 --> 00:28:17,898
Like, it's too creepy
to even think about.
412
00:28:17,900 --> 00:28:19,568
You know he's into you though.
413
00:28:19,570 --> 00:28:20,935
Yeah, I know.
414
00:28:20,937 --> 00:28:22,637
It's all for me.
415
00:28:22,639 --> 00:28:24,639
You living with him.
416
00:28:24,641 --> 00:28:26,807
Don't you think you're
giving him mixed signals?
417
00:28:26,809 --> 00:28:30,744
Fuck off.
418
00:28:30,746 --> 00:28:32,746
Does he notice you
stealing all this snow?
419
00:28:32,748 --> 00:28:34,516
Yeah, why do you think I'd stay?
420
00:28:34,518 --> 00:28:35,883
It'll be some perks living
with the snowman, right?
421
00:28:35,885 --> 00:28:39,420
[LAUGHTER]
422
00:28:39,422 --> 00:28:42,823
Oh, and for my next
trick, this assistant's
423
00:28:42,825 --> 00:28:43,857
going to make it snow.
424
00:28:43,859 --> 00:28:44,725
Fuck shit.
425
00:28:44,727 --> 00:28:46,427
He's here.
426
00:28:46,429 --> 00:28:47,963
Get dressed.
427
00:28:51,901 --> 00:28:55,402
Back early from therapy.
428
00:28:55,404 --> 00:28:57,037
What the fuck happened?
429
00:28:57,039 --> 00:28:58,405
You been drinking again.
430
00:28:58,407 --> 00:29:01,942
It's nothing.
431
00:29:01,944 --> 00:29:03,345
Where were you today
for the audition?
432
00:29:06,749 --> 00:29:09,450
I really needed you.
433
00:29:09,452 --> 00:29:11,519
I told you, Henry, I don't want
to be your assistant anymore.
434
00:29:11,521 --> 00:29:13,120
Don't you get it?
435
00:29:13,122 --> 00:29:15,724
We've not made any money since
you came back from rehab.
436
00:29:15,726 --> 00:29:21,696
But listen, I've got a really
good idea for a new TV show.
437
00:29:21,698 --> 00:29:25,099
It's going to be really good.
438
00:29:25,101 --> 00:29:28,769
So just wait a
little longer here.
439
00:29:28,771 --> 00:29:30,337
Face it, Henry.
440
00:29:30,339 --> 00:29:32,107
You're never going to
be as good as your dad.
441
00:29:35,612 --> 00:29:38,747
Please, I know that I
can turn this act around.
442
00:29:38,749 --> 00:29:40,147
Don't you get it?
443
00:29:40,149 --> 00:29:43,017
People are not into this
puppet stuff anymore.
444
00:29:43,019 --> 00:29:45,085
They're into like CGI
and superhero shit,
445
00:29:45,087 --> 00:29:48,122
not a fucking talking snowman.
446
00:29:48,124 --> 00:29:50,924
Any day now, people are
going to want puppets again.
447
00:29:50,926 --> 00:29:53,494
Listen, Henry.
448
00:29:53,496 --> 00:29:56,196
I've got an agent.
449
00:29:56,198 --> 00:29:58,465
I might as well tell you now,
but I'm moving to London.
450
00:29:58,467 --> 00:29:59,833
I've actually got an
audition next week.
451
00:29:59,835 --> 00:30:01,268
It's for [INAUDIBLE] too.
452
00:30:01,270 --> 00:30:04,972
It's going to be like
a real art house piece.
453
00:30:04,974 --> 00:30:08,442
You can't leave me.
454
00:30:08,444 --> 00:30:11,478
If you leave me now,
you'll regret it.
455
00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:14,448
Your show's shit, just
like everything else you do.
456
00:30:14,450 --> 00:30:16,283
Listen, mate.
457
00:30:16,285 --> 00:30:18,852
It's over.
458
00:30:18,854 --> 00:30:21,388
Who's this?
459
00:30:21,390 --> 00:30:25,092
Someone who doesn't play
with toys for a fucking living.
460
00:30:25,094 --> 00:30:26,193
What are you?
461
00:30:26,195 --> 00:30:27,061
50?
462
00:30:27,063 --> 00:30:29,597
Leave it, Brandon.
463
00:30:29,599 --> 00:30:31,332
Can't leave me for him.
464
00:30:31,334 --> 00:30:34,602
He, unlike you, he
actually believes in me,
465
00:30:34,604 --> 00:30:36,604
that I'm not going to
be some stupid assistant
466
00:30:36,606 --> 00:30:38,607
to a fucking freak like you.
467
00:30:43,913 --> 00:30:45,313
I won't let you go.
468
00:30:48,050 --> 00:30:50,852
You don't have a choice, mate.
469
00:31:03,800 --> 00:31:06,735
Come on, Jade.
470
00:31:06,737 --> 00:31:08,136
I'll wait in the car for you.
471
00:31:16,580 --> 00:31:19,179
It's over, Henry.
472
00:31:19,181 --> 00:31:21,116
Just like your
stupid puppet show.
473
00:31:35,164 --> 00:31:43,572
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
474
00:34:55,130 --> 00:34:58,634
[MUSIC PLAYING]
475
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:41,375
Look at you laying there.
476
00:35:41,377 --> 00:35:42,911
You're pathetic.
477
00:35:45,347 --> 00:35:47,949
You scare the kids.
478
00:35:47,951 --> 00:35:52,185
Yeah you're a loser, Henry.
479
00:35:52,187 --> 00:35:54,723
That's why you don't
win any awards.
480
00:36:01,665 --> 00:36:03,765
Face it.
481
00:36:03,767 --> 00:36:08,402
You should have died in
Norway like your father,
482
00:36:08,404 --> 00:36:12,875
but now, you're going
to die in Margate.
483
00:36:24,253 --> 00:36:25,620
What time is it?
484
00:36:25,622 --> 00:36:27,790
It's time to get up, Henry.
485
00:36:37,299 --> 00:36:40,703
[MUSIC PLAYING]
486
00:36:50,279 --> 00:36:51,846
All right, me darling.
487
00:36:51,848 --> 00:36:56,050
Let's get you going.
488
00:36:56,052 --> 00:36:59,721
Now you've been taking your
tablets because you know if you
489
00:36:59,723 --> 00:37:01,022
don't, you're
going to have to go
490
00:37:01,024 --> 00:37:02,657
and stay in the special house.
491
00:37:02,659 --> 00:37:04,625
We have to sign out
the knives, don't you
492
00:37:04,627 --> 00:37:06,828
if you want to make a sandwich.
493
00:37:06,830 --> 00:37:09,697
Yes.
494
00:37:09,699 --> 00:37:12,633
I've been taking my
medication, Doris.
495
00:37:12,635 --> 00:37:15,803
I'm very glad to
hear that, Henry.
496
00:37:15,805 --> 00:37:17,839
Now what have you got
on there me lover?
497
00:37:17,841 --> 00:37:20,508
Hey, hey, hey, come on.
498
00:37:20,510 --> 00:37:24,645
This... this is for
your own safety.
499
00:37:24,647 --> 00:37:26,446
You know you're not
supposed to have any ties,
500
00:37:26,448 --> 00:37:28,416
no dressing gown coats.
501
00:37:32,387 --> 00:37:34,355
Don't want to end
up like your old pa.
502
00:37:46,368 --> 00:37:48,836
It was time you used
getting dressed anyways.
503
00:37:48,838 --> 00:37:51,304
Dirty Doris.
504
00:37:51,306 --> 00:37:52,808
What was that?
505
00:37:56,012 --> 00:37:57,780
He said goodbye, Doris.
506
00:38:00,083 --> 00:38:02,650
Right.
507
00:38:02,652 --> 00:38:03,785
I'll go and check the
rest of the place.
508
00:38:03,787 --> 00:38:04,619
Don't you move.
509
00:38:04,621 --> 00:38:06,021
I'll be right back.
510
00:38:08,925 --> 00:38:10,526
What's this doing here?
511
00:38:14,063 --> 00:38:15,631
I'll be taking this with me now.
512
00:38:27,277 --> 00:38:35,818
[BELL DINGS]
513
00:38:37,821 --> 00:38:38,953
Mr. White.
514
00:38:38,955 --> 00:38:39,987
DCI Hamilton.
515
00:38:39,989 --> 00:38:41,989
DCI Cross.
516
00:38:41,991 --> 00:38:43,692
May we come in and
have a word, please.
517
00:38:47,230 --> 00:38:48,361
Is this going to take long?
518
00:38:48,363 --> 00:38:49,664
Why?
519
00:38:49,666 --> 00:38:51,033
Have you got somewhere to be?
520
00:38:53,468 --> 00:38:55,837
Yeah, I do actually.
521
00:38:55,839 --> 00:38:59,674
I've got an interview about
a new TV show I'm making.
522
00:38:59,676 --> 00:39:01,710
Are you going with or
without your trousers?
523
00:39:07,150 --> 00:39:08,884
Is that the puppet
your dad used to use?
524
00:39:12,622 --> 00:39:15,156
Have you come about my puppet?
525
00:39:15,158 --> 00:39:21,295
No, we're not interested in
booking any children's parties.
526
00:39:21,297 --> 00:39:24,065
Brian McHugh, better known
as Professor Trueheart,
527
00:39:24,067 --> 00:39:25,499
has gone missing.
528
00:39:28,304 --> 00:39:30,638
Oh, I am sorry to hear that.
529
00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:34,675
His puppet's gone too.
530
00:39:34,677 --> 00:39:37,144
Well, no one would
want that thing.
531
00:39:37,146 --> 00:39:40,314
Least of all, me.
532
00:39:40,316 --> 00:39:42,583
I've got my own, haven't I?
533
00:39:42,585 --> 00:39:43,918
We heard you had an altercation
534
00:39:43,920 --> 00:39:46,554
down at the Tom Thumb Theater.
535
00:39:46,556 --> 00:39:49,857
He stole my father's act.
536
00:39:49,859 --> 00:39:54,328
I was standing up for
what's mine and my father's.
537
00:39:54,330 --> 00:39:55,495
He killed himself, didn't he?
538
00:39:55,497 --> 00:39:57,565
Your father?
539
00:39:57,567 --> 00:39:58,933
Must have been
hard on you as a kid,
540
00:39:58,935 --> 00:40:00,201
but with your mom
leaving as well.
541
00:40:00,203 --> 00:40:01,535
Yeah, where'd she go?
542
00:40:01,537 --> 00:40:04,572
Well, you tell me.
543
00:40:04,574 --> 00:40:07,308
You seem to know a lot about me.
544
00:40:07,310 --> 00:40:10,144
Well, we know your mom went
missing, was never found.
545
00:40:10,146 --> 00:40:12,813
We also a group of young girls
in Norway around that area
546
00:40:12,815 --> 00:40:15,650
went missing right
about the same time,
547
00:40:15,652 --> 00:40:19,486
surely before your
dad took his own life.
548
00:40:19,488 --> 00:40:21,757
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
549
00:41:19,148 --> 00:41:22,750
I don't like where
are you going with this.
550
00:41:22,752 --> 00:41:26,587
Those young girls had
nothing to do with my father.
551
00:41:26,589 --> 00:41:30,758
Just making conversation.
552
00:41:30,760 --> 00:41:32,893
So you know nothing
about Brian McHugh.
553
00:41:32,895 --> 00:41:35,963
The last time I saw him
was at the theater yesterday.
554
00:41:35,965 --> 00:41:38,266
Well, if you do think of
anything, give us a call.
555
00:41:43,607 --> 00:41:46,141
We'll show ourselves out.
556
00:41:46,143 --> 00:41:50,512
Oh, and good luck
with the TV show.
557
00:41:50,514 --> 00:41:52,115
Yeah, don't forget
your trousers.
558
00:42:04,061 --> 00:42:05,695
Fuck.
559
00:42:11,268 --> 00:42:13,402
We're sorry Mr. White,
but we're going to have
560
00:42:13,404 --> 00:42:15,337
to cancel your interview today.
561
00:42:15,339 --> 00:42:16,638
We don't think you're quite
right for this channel
562
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:17,773
moving forward.
563
00:42:17,775 --> 00:42:19,075
We wish you all the best.
564
00:42:25,716 --> 00:42:34,123
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
565
00:42:35,059 --> 00:42:41,930
[BELL DINGS]
566
00:42:41,932 --> 00:42:43,633
It's built for carol
singers, isn't it?
567
00:42:52,676 --> 00:42:54,510
You're right?
568
00:42:54,512 --> 00:42:56,778
Who are you?
569
00:42:56,780 --> 00:43:00,315
I can be whoever
you want me to be.
570
00:43:00,317 --> 00:43:01,583
I didn't call you.
571
00:43:01,585 --> 00:43:03,919
Well, someone did.
572
00:43:03,921 --> 00:43:05,354
I ain't leaving
till I've been paid.
573
00:43:20,572 --> 00:43:24,106
My father once brought a girl
like you back to our house.
574
00:43:24,108 --> 00:43:25,675
Oh, yeah.
575
00:43:36,019 --> 00:43:37,687
Would you like a cup of tea?
576
00:43:40,858 --> 00:43:42,090
Don't know the
first thing I'm asked?
577
00:43:42,092 --> 00:43:42,791
Go on then.
578
00:43:42,793 --> 00:43:43,859
Milk, no sugar.
579
00:43:43,861 --> 00:43:45,361
Sweet enough.
580
00:43:56,740 --> 00:43:59,708
What the fuck is this thing?
581
00:43:59,710 --> 00:44:01,144
That's Dr. White.
582
00:44:02,614 --> 00:44:03,812
What?
583
00:44:03,814 --> 00:44:05,981
I always get the weird ones.
584
00:44:05,983 --> 00:44:07,383
Why is he a doctor?
585
00:44:10,220 --> 00:44:13,923
He fixes things,
especially people.
586
00:44:17,094 --> 00:44:19,427
Well, I like what you've
done with the place.
587
00:44:19,429 --> 00:44:21,063
Makes a change in
the back of a car.
588
00:44:23,367 --> 00:44:31,908
[MUSIC PLAYING]
589
00:44:32,876 --> 00:44:34,876
Got any biscuits?
590
00:44:34,878 --> 00:44:37,746
No, sorry.
591
00:44:37,748 --> 00:44:41,016
I'm on a diet.
592
00:44:41,018 --> 00:44:44,019
The doctor said I've
got to cut back.
593
00:44:44,021 --> 00:44:46,923
A real doctor or doctor puppet?
594
00:44:49,126 --> 00:44:51,627
Dr. White is a real doctor.
595
00:44:51,629 --> 00:44:53,796
Sorry if I hurt his feelings.
596
00:44:58,802 --> 00:45:00,670
Hey, could I record you?
597
00:45:00,672 --> 00:45:03,972
I don't do videos, mate.
598
00:45:03,974 --> 00:45:07,475
No, Dr. White and I are
putting together a new act.
599
00:45:07,477 --> 00:45:08,611
Act?
600
00:45:08,613 --> 00:45:11,112
Yeah.
601
00:45:11,114 --> 00:45:15,083
We're putting together a
pilot for a new TV show.
602
00:45:15,085 --> 00:45:21,056
Our last assistant left.
603
00:45:21,058 --> 00:45:24,726
Hey, would you like to be
the star of my new show?
604
00:45:24,728 --> 00:45:26,728
I'm... I'm not sure.
605
00:45:26,730 --> 00:45:28,797
Yeah, let me show
you what Dr. White
606
00:45:28,799 --> 00:45:30,299
and I've been putting together.
607
00:45:36,940 --> 00:45:38,441
What is this?
608
00:45:52,889 --> 00:45:54,323
I'm leaving now, Henry.
609
00:46:03,934 --> 00:46:06,134
The fuck is wrong
with you, Henry?
610
00:46:06,136 --> 00:46:08,971
Don't talk to him, he
just pulls the sleigh.
611
00:46:12,909 --> 00:46:14,744
Jade, what's taking you so long?
612
00:46:14,746 --> 00:46:15,877
[MUSIC PLAYING]
613
00:46:15,879 --> 00:46:19,180
[INAUDIBLE] have turned white.
614
00:46:19,182 --> 00:46:21,717
Santa is dropping bombs tonight.
615
00:46:21,719 --> 00:46:22,652
Jade.
616
00:46:22,654 --> 00:46:24,419
[MUSIC PLAYING]
617
00:46:24,421 --> 00:46:32,028
It's getting cold is the snow,
and I know you won't be home.
618
00:46:32,462 --> 00:46:37,832
I'm changing you
in fall out light.
619
00:46:37,834 --> 00:46:41,436
And I can see your
lips turning blue.
620
00:46:41,438 --> 00:46:42,437
I shouldn't...
621
00:46:42,439 --> 00:46:43,939
What the fuck?
622
00:46:46,644 --> 00:46:49,044
What the fuck, you
sick fucking bastard!
623
00:46:49,046 --> 00:46:50,011
Please, no.
624
00:46:50,013 --> 00:46:51,781
[CRYING], please.
625
00:46:51,783 --> 00:46:54,717
Get off me!
626
00:46:54,719 --> 00:46:57,553
Fucking bastard, let me go!
627
00:46:57,555 --> 00:47:00,989
He's got brain freeze.
628
00:47:00,991 --> 00:47:04,025
[LAUGHTER]
629
00:47:04,027 --> 00:47:12,569
[SCREAMING]
630
00:47:15,506 --> 00:47:16,838
[MUSIC PLAYING]
631
00:47:16,840 --> 00:47:20,108
They would be
pulling out of town.
632
00:47:20,110 --> 00:47:22,044
Starting [INAUDIBLE].
633
00:47:26,416 --> 00:47:34,056
My hunting rifle ordered here,
watching ash fall from the sky,
634
00:47:34,559 --> 00:47:36,192
Henry.
635
00:47:37,762 --> 00:47:39,060
[MUSIC PLAYING]
636
00:47:39,062 --> 00:47:42,865
None of the children
gone to hunt...
637
00:47:44,769 --> 00:47:47,737
Henry.
638
00:47:47,739 --> 00:47:49,538
This Pinocchio.
639
00:47:49,540 --> 00:47:51,339
Let me go, please.
640
00:47:51,341 --> 00:47:54,844
Thought he was a real boy.
641
00:47:54,846 --> 00:47:56,478
No!
642
00:47:56,480 --> 00:47:59,115
Dr. White, fix him.
643
00:48:01,819 --> 00:48:06,488
I got strings to hold me up.
644
00:48:06,490 --> 00:48:09,692
Pinocchio, he's waving at
you through the River Martis.
645
00:48:09,694 --> 00:48:12,094
[SINISTER LAUGHTER]
646
00:48:13,964 --> 00:48:15,397
Please let me go.
647
00:48:15,399 --> 00:48:17,399
[CRYING]
648
00:48:17,401 --> 00:48:19,835
[SCREAMING]
649
00:48:19,837 --> 00:48:21,505
No.
650
00:48:22,906 --> 00:48:24,574
No.
651
00:48:29,079 --> 00:48:31,946
The puppet show.
652
00:48:31,948 --> 00:48:34,684
[LAUGHTER]
653
00:48:37,622 --> 00:48:42,056
Oh, Oh, Franza,
what are you doing?
654
00:48:42,058 --> 00:48:44,392
Oh, I'm just hanging around.
655
00:48:44,394 --> 00:48:48,296
[LAUGHTER]
656
00:48:48,298 --> 00:48:51,801
I was stupid to think
that I could ever replace
657
00:48:51,803 --> 00:48:55,604
this sweet and talented Henry.
658
00:48:55,606 --> 00:49:01,409
Wolfe, he's got the best
act in the whole of Margate.
659
00:49:01,411 --> 00:49:04,681
[LAUGHTER]
660
00:49:12,088 --> 00:49:12,822
Oh, my God.
661
00:49:12,824 --> 00:49:13,923
Jesus.
662
00:49:13,925 --> 00:49:14,924
Oh, my God.
663
00:49:14,926 --> 00:49:16,024
Oh, my God.
664
00:49:16,026 --> 00:49:17,492
Oh, God.
665
00:49:17,494 --> 00:49:18,661
Oh, shit.
666
00:49:18,663 --> 00:49:21,030
Oh, oh, my God.
667
00:49:26,036 --> 00:49:27,837
I haven't been
taking my happy pills.
668
00:49:27,839 --> 00:49:31,207
[LAUGHTER]
669
00:49:33,109 --> 00:49:35,477
I didn't need a mouth.
670
00:49:35,479 --> 00:49:38,247
Consider yourself checked out.
671
00:49:45,121 --> 00:49:47,657
I wonder what
they're dreaming about.
672
00:50:00,838 --> 00:50:05,774
Henry, what are you doing.
673
00:50:05,776 --> 00:50:08,142
I'm sorry.
674
00:50:08,144 --> 00:50:10,012
I brought the puppet
with me again.
675
00:50:12,683 --> 00:50:14,450
We've been having fun.
676
00:50:18,188 --> 00:50:20,255
Henry, you're not
supposed to be here.
677
00:50:20,257 --> 00:50:22,758
You were right.
678
00:50:22,760 --> 00:50:27,328
There are some things I didn't
tell you about my father.
679
00:50:27,330 --> 00:50:31,800
He used to kill young girls.
680
00:50:31,802 --> 00:50:36,104
And then he'd make love to
their bodies in the snow.
681
00:50:36,106 --> 00:50:38,974
My mother found his trophies.
682
00:50:38,976 --> 00:50:47,383
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
683
00:50:49,921 --> 00:50:52,154
That's why she had to die.
684
00:50:54,992 --> 00:50:56,559
He wasn't all bad, though.
685
00:50:56,561 --> 00:50:58,193
He dealt with those bullies.
686
00:51:08,405 --> 00:51:10,171
Just going to call for help.
687
00:51:10,173 --> 00:51:13,008
There's no help.
688
00:51:13,010 --> 00:51:15,144
Dr. White got rid of them all.
689
00:51:32,797 --> 00:51:36,098
Oh, I'm sorry,
we're out of time.
690
00:51:40,905 --> 00:51:43,438
Oh, that'll be our date.
691
00:51:43,440 --> 00:51:46,075
Let's put the awards out.
692
00:51:46,077 --> 00:51:47,677
You dirty old bugger.
693
00:51:53,751 --> 00:51:56,251
[DOOR CREAKING]
694
00:52:00,091 --> 00:52:05,661
[LAUGHTER]
695
00:52:05,663 --> 00:52:07,062
[CAT CALL]
696
00:52:07,064 --> 00:52:08,664
Fuck off.
697
00:52:08,666 --> 00:52:10,499
Right, darling.
698
00:52:10,501 --> 00:52:14,302
Want us to show you a
good time this Christmas?
699
00:52:14,304 --> 00:52:17,338
[JINGLE BELLS]
700
00:52:17,340 --> 00:52:20,208
Mate, did you hear that?
701
00:52:20,210 --> 00:52:23,312
[JINGLE BELLS]
702
00:52:35,092 --> 00:52:35,991
Guys.
703
00:52:35,993 --> 00:52:38,961
[GASPING]
704
00:52:38,963 --> 00:52:42,398
[JINGLE BELLS]
705
00:53:02,119 --> 00:53:05,454
[SCREAMS]
706
00:53:23,507 --> 00:53:26,642
So why did the
man want a divorce?
707
00:53:26,644 --> 00:53:28,811
Because his wife
was a total flake.
708
00:53:28,813 --> 00:53:30,411
[LAUGHTER]
709
00:53:30,413 --> 00:53:31,245
Thank you.
710
00:53:31,247 --> 00:53:33,281
Thank you.
711
00:53:33,283 --> 00:53:35,451
Tough crowd, Dr. White.
712
00:53:42,425 --> 00:53:45,293
Eloy, where are you?
713
00:53:45,295 --> 00:53:49,098
I told you to lock up.
714
00:53:49,100 --> 00:53:52,635
Franza, I told you you
didn't make the cut.
715
00:54:15,425 --> 00:54:19,260
I remember laying in bed as a
kid waiting for Santa to come.
716
00:54:19,262 --> 00:54:21,764
Oh, yes, Dr. White.
717
00:54:21,766 --> 00:54:25,033
Yes, then there was
always that awkward silence
718
00:54:25,035 --> 00:54:26,703
as he got dressed and left.
719
00:54:34,879 --> 00:54:39,047
They're still not
laughing, Henry.
720
00:54:39,049 --> 00:54:41,116
That's because you knocked
them dead, Dr. White.
721
00:54:41,118 --> 00:54:44,554
[MUSIC PLAYING]
722
00:54:55,431 --> 00:54:57,600
So what do you think.
723
00:55:01,371 --> 00:55:04,239
I have a great role for you.
724
00:55:04,241 --> 00:55:05,240
Can I use your bathroom?
725
00:55:05,242 --> 00:55:06,809
Sure.
726
00:55:06,811 --> 00:55:10,112
Me and Dr. White I'll
be waiting for you.
727
00:55:10,114 --> 00:55:11,614
Can't wait to get your feedback.
728
00:55:29,700 --> 00:55:32,366
What's taking you so long?
729
00:55:32,368 --> 00:55:34,636
Dr. White is worried about you.
730
00:55:34,638 --> 00:55:36,105
I'll be out in a sec.
731
00:55:39,375 --> 00:55:41,276
We're going to make you a star.
732
00:55:41,278 --> 00:55:42,712
Stay away from me.
733
00:55:47,885 --> 00:55:51,353
This Christmas, everyone's
got to love puppets again.
734
00:56:11,374 --> 00:56:13,509
We come with a search wa.
735
00:56:20,150 --> 00:56:21,684
I think I just killed a client.
736
00:56:23,988 --> 00:56:25,419
Bloody Christmas.
737
00:56:25,421 --> 00:56:28,123
[MUSIC PLAYING]
738
00:56:28,125 --> 00:56:35,798
Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
739
00:56:36,233 --> 00:56:43,907
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
740
00:56:44,975 --> 00:56:50,612
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
741
00:56:50,614 --> 00:56:59,022
[NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
742
00:57:01,191 --> 00:57:03,491
How would you like
to make a snowman?
743
00:57:03,493 --> 00:57:06,828
Like Dr. White?
744
00:57:06,830 --> 00:57:08,897
No, I want to make
a normal snowman.
745
00:57:08,899 --> 00:57:12,234
Aha, normal snowmen are boring.
746
00:57:12,236 --> 00:57:15,469
They just melt like
humans and let you down.
747
00:57:15,471 --> 00:57:17,906
Humans don't melt.
748
00:57:17,908 --> 00:57:19,708
They do if you put
them in a blast furnace,
749
00:57:19,710 --> 00:57:21,910
or pour acid on them.
750
00:57:21,912 --> 00:57:25,847
Why have you come
especially for me, Santa?
751
00:57:25,849 --> 00:57:29,318
I've been told you've
been feeling unwell,
752
00:57:29,320 --> 00:57:31,186
and your parents called
me up from North Pole
753
00:57:31,188 --> 00:57:34,790
to cheer you up.
754
00:57:34,792 --> 00:57:38,093
Well, I'm... I'm
feeling a lot better now.
755
00:57:38,095 --> 00:57:40,562
I wouldn't want to hold
you up delivering presents.
756
00:57:40,564 --> 00:57:43,332
Oh, don't you worry about them.
757
00:57:43,334 --> 00:57:48,003
Most of the other kids have
been naughty this year.
758
00:57:48,005 --> 00:57:51,573
I know a kid of your age who
was visited by Krampus instead.
759
00:57:51,575 --> 00:57:53,709
Krampus?
760
00:57:53,711 --> 00:57:57,946
However bad you might
feel this Christmas,
761
00:57:57,948 --> 00:58:02,884
it is nothing like being
visited by Krampus.
762
00:58:02,886 --> 00:58:06,755
Now this is a little
story me and my elves
763
00:58:06,757 --> 00:58:11,760
call Merry Krampus.
764
00:58:11,762 --> 00:58:19,502
And this, this is the last
toy Luke ever played with.
765
00:58:23,140 --> 00:58:23,773
Come on, Luke.
766
00:58:23,775 --> 00:58:26,142
Time for bed.
767
00:58:26,144 --> 00:58:27,677
You know it's your last day
of school before the Christmas
768
00:58:27,679 --> 00:58:28,911
holidays tomorrow.
769
00:58:28,913 --> 00:58:30,581
Come on.
770
00:58:36,021 --> 00:58:40,957
Will daddy you come and
visit us this Christmas?
771
00:58:40,959 --> 00:58:43,193
Or will he stay with
the new lady he likes?
772
00:58:47,098 --> 00:58:51,134
I guess I won't be getting into
the robot toy this Christmas.
773
00:58:51,136 --> 00:58:52,769
I'm sure daddy's going to
get you something really nice
774
00:58:52,771 --> 00:58:54,337
for Christmas.
775
00:58:54,339 --> 00:58:56,005
You know he loves you very much.
776
00:58:56,007 --> 00:58:57,674
And you?
777
00:59:02,781 --> 00:59:04,748
Like I said, he loves
you very, very much.
778
00:59:07,118 --> 00:59:08,986
Sweet dreams, OK?
779
00:59:13,691 --> 00:59:17,127
[PHONE RINGING]
780
00:59:20,231 --> 00:59:22,365
Hey, where are you?
781
00:59:22,367 --> 00:59:24,267
Nowhere.
782
00:59:24,269 --> 00:59:25,601
Well, hurry up.
783
00:59:25,603 --> 00:59:27,603
I have a surprise
waiting for you.
784
00:59:27,605 --> 00:59:28,704
I'm freezing my tits off.
785
00:59:28,706 --> 00:59:30,640
It's winter.
786
00:59:30,642 --> 00:59:32,209
Right bye.
787
00:59:44,823 --> 00:59:48,325
[MUSIC PLAYING]
788
00:59:56,734 --> 01:00:00,270
[SOBBING]
789
01:00:13,151 --> 01:00:16,085
So, Louise, how
are you getting on?
790
01:00:16,087 --> 01:00:19,455
I know Christmas can be a
particularly hard time of year.
791
01:00:19,457 --> 01:00:21,724
I'm OK.
792
01:00:21,726 --> 01:00:24,460
The antidepressants
are really helping.
793
01:00:24,462 --> 01:00:27,497
And you're not leaning
too much on the drink.
794
01:00:27,499 --> 01:00:30,767
Oh, God, no, that's just
like a bit of Christmas cheer.
795
01:00:32,837 --> 01:00:34,203
And how are the kids?
796
01:00:34,205 --> 01:00:35,638
The kids are fine.
797
01:00:35,640 --> 01:00:38,341
The kids are really good.
798
01:00:38,343 --> 01:00:40,443
So last day of school today
before the Christmas holidays.
799
01:00:40,445 --> 01:00:43,312
I think they're really excited.
800
01:00:43,314 --> 01:00:45,681
Anywhere from the dads?
801
01:00:45,683 --> 01:00:47,817
Nothing.
802
01:00:47,819 --> 01:00:50,853
Anything to get out of
paying child support.
803
01:00:50,855 --> 01:00:53,856
Now two of them have
walked out on me.
804
01:00:53,858 --> 01:00:56,492
OK, well, if you need
anything, you and the kids
805
01:00:56,494 --> 01:00:57,894
just give me a call, OK?
806
01:00:57,896 --> 01:00:59,429
Thank you.
807
01:01:12,377 --> 01:01:15,278
You are all right, Luke?
808
01:01:15,280 --> 01:01:17,346
I'm fine.
809
01:01:17,348 --> 01:01:18,347
I'm not hungry.
810
01:01:18,349 --> 01:01:21,250
I'm going to go to bed.
811
01:01:21,252 --> 01:01:25,121
Mom, are you going
to do anything?
812
01:01:25,123 --> 01:01:27,023
If he's not hungry,
what am I supposed to do?
813
01:01:27,025 --> 01:01:28,324
Force feed him like
he's on hunger strike?
814
01:01:28,326 --> 01:01:30,259
This isn't a prison.
815
01:01:30,261 --> 01:01:32,261
Prison food would
be better though.
816
01:01:32,263 --> 01:01:35,064
This is all we can
afford right now.
817
01:01:35,066 --> 01:01:36,732
Since you lost your job.
818
01:01:36,734 --> 01:01:39,570
Yes, Diana, since I lost my job.
819
01:01:39,572 --> 01:01:41,470
Well, I can't wait to find
out what Christmas dinner
820
01:01:41,472 --> 01:01:42,972
is going to be like tomorrow.
821
01:01:42,974 --> 01:01:45,775
Some kids were picking on Luke,
822
01:01:45,777 --> 01:01:47,944
and they said that it was his
fault that dad left like ours.
823
01:01:47,946 --> 01:01:50,179
But that's ridiculous.
824
01:01:50,181 --> 01:01:51,648
They also said that
Krampus is going to come
825
01:01:51,650 --> 01:01:53,883
visit us this Christmas.
826
01:01:53,885 --> 01:01:55,718
Krampus... you've
got to stop listening
827
01:01:55,720 --> 01:01:58,921
to this stupid rubbish, OK?
828
01:01:58,923 --> 01:02:00,490
This house is too
depressing for Krampus.
829
01:02:27,218 --> 01:02:28,884
Did any of the neighbors
see you creep over the fence?
830
01:02:28,886 --> 01:02:31,420
No, I don't think so.
831
01:02:31,422 --> 01:02:32,522
Did he really live here?
832
01:02:32,524 --> 01:02:34,023
Yeah.
833
01:02:34,025 --> 01:02:35,491
Did the old man
who lived here really
834
01:02:35,493 --> 01:02:36,959
tell people he was Krampus?
835
01:02:36,961 --> 01:02:38,729
Yeah, he was like
that guy Wayne Gacy
836
01:02:38,731 --> 01:02:40,463
that dressed up as a clown.
837
01:02:40,465 --> 01:02:41,964
Why would any parent
want to invite the Krampus
838
01:02:41,966 --> 01:02:43,600
to their kid's party?
839
01:02:43,602 --> 01:02:45,234
To scare them if they've
been naughty maybe.
840
01:02:45,236 --> 01:02:46,302
Beats Cole.
841
01:02:46,304 --> 01:02:48,705
When did he die?
842
01:02:48,707 --> 01:02:50,373
They found him hanging dead
upstairs from a Christmas tree
843
01:02:50,375 --> 01:02:52,208
last year.
844
01:02:52,210 --> 01:02:54,277
I haven't been able
to sell her since.
845
01:02:54,279 --> 01:02:55,978
Apparently, you had
a book on pagan magic
846
01:02:55,980 --> 01:02:57,515
and was trying to
raise the real Krampus.
847
01:03:01,720 --> 01:03:04,888
[SCREAMS]
848
01:03:05,790 --> 01:03:07,056
That was so funny, Lily.
849
01:03:07,058 --> 01:03:10,359
You guys suck.
850
01:03:10,361 --> 01:03:11,927
I'm going to call
my parents on you.
851
01:03:11,929 --> 01:03:13,229
It was only a joke, Lily.
852
01:03:13,231 --> 01:03:15,197
Maybe we were a bit mean, guys.
853
01:03:15,199 --> 01:03:16,633
You're such a sissy, Benjie.
854
01:03:16,635 --> 01:03:18,168
It's hilarious.
855
01:03:22,874 --> 01:03:24,509
Stupid boys.
856
01:03:29,113 --> 01:03:33,550
Really how stupid
do you think I am?
857
01:03:33,552 --> 01:03:35,252
Look what I found
in one of the drawers.
858
01:03:38,456 --> 01:03:41,857
Maybe that's the poem
he used to raise Krampus.
859
01:03:41,859 --> 01:03:43,292
Children, take
this into account.
860
01:03:43,294 --> 01:03:45,261
Have you been bad this year?
861
01:03:45,263 --> 01:03:46,763
Tonight's the night
that Krampus comes.
862
01:03:46,765 --> 01:03:48,431
Have you something to fear?
863
01:03:48,433 --> 01:03:49,865
If you're a good
child, you'll sleep
864
01:03:49,867 --> 01:03:52,168
well for he will pass you by.
865
01:03:52,170 --> 01:03:54,136
But if you are a naughty child,
he'll hang you out to dry.
866
01:03:54,138 --> 01:03:55,539
I think we should
get out of here.
867
01:03:55,541 --> 01:03:56,773
I think he's right, Craig.
868
01:03:56,775 --> 01:03:58,274
It's just starting to get fun.
869
01:03:58,276 --> 01:04:01,344
You two are such
girls like Lily.
870
01:04:01,346 --> 01:04:04,380
Then there comes a type of
death that Krampus offers too.
871
01:04:04,382 --> 01:04:07,350
Perhaps a strangulation or
a drowning would suit you.
872
01:04:07,352 --> 01:04:10,353
Alternatively, Krampus can
just take you straight to hell,
873
01:04:10,355 --> 01:04:12,623
and nothing will be left of
you, and nothing left to tell.
874
01:04:15,393 --> 01:04:17,027
What?
875
01:04:20,599 --> 01:04:24,200
[SCREAMS]
876
01:04:24,202 --> 01:04:27,470
What are you doing, Luke?
877
01:04:27,472 --> 01:04:29,673
Watching this video
about Krampus online.
878
01:04:29,675 --> 01:04:32,274
Did you know he drowns
and eats children
879
01:04:32,276 --> 01:04:34,845
after taking them to hell
in a basket on his back?
880
01:04:34,847 --> 01:04:35,846
And don't watch that.
881
01:04:35,848 --> 01:04:37,179
Come on, go to bed.
882
01:04:37,181 --> 01:04:38,648
We've been good this year.
883
01:04:38,650 --> 01:04:41,016
Santa is coming, not Krampus.
884
01:04:41,018 --> 01:04:42,587
Then why did dad leave?
885
01:04:52,964 --> 01:04:54,664
When are you
going to give it up.
886
01:04:54,666 --> 01:04:57,701
I'm really not falling
for it this time.
887
01:04:57,703 --> 01:05:02,905
[SCREAMS]
888
01:05:02,907 --> 01:05:04,240
Come on, Jonathan.
889
01:05:04,242 --> 01:05:07,009
Come back to bed.
890
01:05:07,011 --> 01:05:09,746
It's Christmas Eve.
891
01:05:09,748 --> 01:05:11,148
I want cheering up.
892
01:05:14,653 --> 01:05:18,053
This doesn't feel right.
893
01:05:18,055 --> 01:05:20,824
I should be with my kids.
894
01:05:20,826 --> 01:05:23,527
Only one of them yours.
895
01:05:23,529 --> 01:05:27,963
Odell get over it is
just one Christmas.
896
01:05:27,965 --> 01:05:29,866
Things will get better next year
when she gets pregnant with yet
897
01:05:29,868 --> 01:05:31,100
another bloke.
898
01:05:31,102 --> 01:05:33,537
I need some air.
899
01:05:33,539 --> 01:05:36,272
Don't take too long.
900
01:05:36,274 --> 01:05:38,108
You're really starting to
bring this Christmas down.
901
01:05:48,052 --> 01:05:50,986
No, daddy.
902
01:05:50,988 --> 01:05:56,192
Daddy, daddy not tonight.
903
01:05:56,194 --> 01:05:57,728
It's Christmas.
904
01:06:04,870 --> 01:06:06,537
No.
905
01:06:14,880 --> 01:06:16,514
Oh, God's sake.
906
01:06:19,484 --> 01:06:21,150
Oh, hi, Denise.
907
01:06:21,152 --> 01:06:25,187
It's Louise.
908
01:06:25,189 --> 01:06:29,593
I don't know if you
could possibly pop by.
909
01:06:29,595 --> 01:06:32,562
I'm just not really
feeling myself.
910
01:06:32,564 --> 01:06:35,364
I don't know if it's
the medication or
911
01:06:35,366 --> 01:06:36,867
I've just been having
some weird dreams
912
01:06:36,869 --> 01:06:40,704
and the kids have been
saying some weird stuff,
913
01:06:40,706 --> 01:06:44,875
but yeah, give me a call
back or maybe pop by.
914
01:06:44,877 --> 01:06:45,942
Thanks.
915
01:06:45,944 --> 01:06:47,612
Bye.
916
01:07:09,100 --> 01:07:10,635
Hey, Louise.
917
01:07:12,871 --> 01:07:14,303
I know that I'm the
last person that you
918
01:07:14,305 --> 01:07:15,740
want to hear from right now.
919
01:07:18,744 --> 01:07:21,912
I really want to come round
tomorrow and see the kids.
920
01:07:21,914 --> 01:07:24,281
You have to understand that
this is killing me too.
921
01:07:28,352 --> 01:07:30,220
Don't think there's any
more guilt after this.
922
01:07:34,026 --> 01:07:36,726
Please, just pick up.
923
01:07:36,728 --> 01:07:38,395
Louise.
924
01:07:40,566 --> 01:07:42,232
Louise.
925
01:07:46,437 --> 01:07:48,104
Louise.
926
01:08:00,451 --> 01:08:02,484
Fuck it.
927
01:08:02,486 --> 01:08:04,120
Come around whether
you like it or not.
928
01:08:10,361 --> 01:08:12,329
I'll get more like a
fucking Krampus tonight.
929
01:08:18,870 --> 01:08:21,403
Oh, what's this?
930
01:08:21,405 --> 01:08:24,473
A naughty little note, Jonathan.
931
01:08:24,475 --> 01:08:26,276
I hope it's not dirty.
932
01:09:35,781 --> 01:09:37,446
You're frighten
the other children.
933
01:09:37,448 --> 01:09:39,783
Mom, I heard noises.
934
01:09:39,785 --> 01:09:41,217
Are the rats back?
935
01:09:43,889 --> 01:09:46,823
Are the rats back?
936
01:09:46,825 --> 01:09:49,760
I've never been so
insulted in my life.
937
01:10:02,107 --> 01:10:06,376
Andrew, is that you
playing with my robot toy?
938
01:10:36,174 --> 01:10:38,241
You made him leave.
939
01:10:40,377 --> 01:10:43,246
You ruined Christmas.
940
01:10:50,287 --> 01:10:53,923
Krampus is here, Luke.
941
01:10:53,925 --> 01:10:55,726
It's time to play.
942
01:11:02,466 --> 01:11:10,173
[LAUGHTER]
943
01:11:10,175 --> 01:11:11,273
Louise, it's Denise.
944
01:11:11,275 --> 01:11:13,910
Your door was open.
945
01:11:13,912 --> 01:11:15,311
I got your message.
946
01:11:18,083 --> 01:11:22,952
Louise, what have you done?
947
01:11:22,954 --> 01:11:24,554
He says their father
he's gone insane.
948
01:11:24,556 --> 01:11:27,456
He's killed the kids.
949
01:11:27,458 --> 01:11:32,028
He's telling the house,
you need to get help.
950
01:11:32,030 --> 01:11:33,163
Oh, God.
951
01:11:33,165 --> 01:11:34,496
OK, OK, don't...
952
01:11:34,498 --> 01:11:35,732
Don't worry.
953
01:11:35,734 --> 01:11:37,400
Oh, God.
954
01:11:39,971 --> 01:11:41,639
Oh, God.
955
01:12:12,070 --> 01:12:13,870
You know what, I'm leaving.
956
01:12:13,872 --> 01:12:15,271
There's something not
quite right with you.
957
01:12:15,273 --> 01:12:16,639
You need... you need help.
958
01:12:16,641 --> 01:12:18,542
You're not taking
them away from me.
959
01:12:21,813 --> 01:12:26,649
Krampus days are here
again, your kids will die,
960
01:12:26,651 --> 01:12:29,285
and the sky falling.
961
01:12:29,287 --> 01:12:30,653
Diana, Andrew.
962
01:12:30,655 --> 01:12:31,754
What have you done to them?
963
01:12:31,756 --> 01:12:33,756
They're just sleeping.
964
01:12:33,758 --> 01:12:35,325
I gave them some Rohypnol.
965
01:12:35,327 --> 01:12:36,759
You've drugged our children.
966
01:12:36,761 --> 01:12:37,861
What's the matter with you?
967
01:12:37,863 --> 01:12:39,295
I'm down.
968
01:12:39,297 --> 01:12:41,397
Just because you got
daddy-son's issues doesn't...
969
01:12:52,110 --> 01:12:56,045
He'll make you all disappear,
just like the others.
970
01:12:56,047 --> 01:13:04,622
[SCREAMS]
971
01:13:12,764 --> 01:13:17,834
Well, there goes another one.
972
01:13:17,836 --> 01:13:20,169
You know, none of
your relationships
973
01:13:20,171 --> 01:13:21,871
are going to work
out if you insist
974
01:13:21,873 --> 01:13:25,642
on stabbing them all to death.
975
01:13:25,644 --> 01:13:28,244
I think he was right.
976
01:13:28,246 --> 01:13:30,713
Maybe you should have
accepted that invitation
977
01:13:30,715 --> 01:13:34,617
for relationship
guidance counseling.
978
01:13:34,619 --> 01:13:37,887
Oh, daddy's going
to go and lie down.
979
01:13:37,889 --> 01:13:39,924
I can feel a cramp coming up.
980
01:14:01,846 --> 01:14:05,581
Look at our little darlings.
981
01:14:05,583 --> 01:14:09,619
Peaceful and ready
for Christmas Day.
982
01:14:09,621 --> 01:14:13,123
[LAUGHTER]
983
01:14:14,859 --> 01:14:17,727
I'm going back to hell now.
984
01:14:17,729 --> 01:14:22,265
I'll see you next Christmas.
985
01:14:22,267 --> 01:14:30,207
(SINGING) Silent night,
Holy night, all is calm,
986
01:14:35,280 --> 01:14:43,253
all is bright, sleep
in heavenly peace.
987
01:14:49,661 --> 01:14:52,829
I dare, more sick and senseless
988
01:14:52,831 --> 01:14:56,265
this year than ever before.
989
01:14:56,267 --> 01:14:57,768
Cramping my style.
990
01:15:01,539 --> 01:15:05,042
I love it when the pretty ones
die so horribly, don't you?
991
01:15:15,287 --> 01:15:16,420
It wasn't me.
992
01:15:16,422 --> 01:15:18,288
Krampus did it.
993
01:15:18,290 --> 01:15:19,824
That's what they all say, love.
994
01:15:22,762 --> 01:15:25,562
So have we got anything
come through on it yet?
995
01:15:25,564 --> 01:15:27,831
Yes, inspector.
996
01:15:27,833 --> 01:15:31,068
She was abused by her father,
she was being monitored
997
01:15:31,070 --> 01:15:33,137
after her other half
left because she
998
01:15:33,139 --> 01:15:35,105
was having a nervous breakdown,
and you never guess what...
999
01:15:35,107 --> 01:15:37,041
What?
1000
01:15:37,043 --> 01:15:39,511
The father was only a bloody
sicko Santa person hater.
1001
01:15:39,513 --> 01:15:42,514
Oh, great.
1002
01:15:42,516 --> 01:15:47,117
I can see this is going to
be one of those Christmases.
1003
01:15:47,119 --> 01:15:50,554
Right, I'll leave you to
clear the mess up here,
1004
01:15:50,556 --> 01:15:54,324
so at least I can try and get
back to my own kids, that's
1005
01:15:54,326 --> 01:15:55,993
assuming the missus
hasn't already cut them up
1006
01:15:55,995 --> 01:15:57,295
and put them in the oven.
1007
01:16:03,803 --> 01:16:05,969
Oh, Denise, what
are you doing here?
1008
01:16:05,971 --> 01:16:07,404
She's only going to get
herself bloody murdered,
1009
01:16:07,406 --> 01:16:08,138
isn't she?
1010
01:16:08,140 --> 01:16:09,406
You are?
1011
01:16:09,408 --> 01:16:10,774
Sliced up like bacon.
1012
01:16:10,776 --> 01:16:12,510
But I like Denise.
1013
01:16:12,512 --> 01:16:14,311
I like bacon.
1014
01:16:14,313 --> 01:16:16,080
I like bacon.
1015
01:16:16,082 --> 01:16:17,948
Check up with a frying pan on.
1016
01:16:17,950 --> 01:16:18,849
Why not?
1017
01:16:18,851 --> 01:16:19,716
Red or brown sauce?
1018
01:16:19,718 --> 01:16:20,552
Brown.
1019
01:16:20,554 --> 01:16:22,220
Perfect.
1020
01:16:28,994 --> 01:16:31,795
So it wasn't Krampus,
it was the mom.
1021
01:16:31,797 --> 01:16:37,434
Yeah, she was North Polar.
1022
01:16:37,436 --> 01:16:39,069
There are freaks out there who
actually think they're Santa,
1023
01:16:39,071 --> 01:16:41,438
you know.
1024
01:16:41,440 --> 01:16:44,576
I know, shocking, isn't it?
1025
01:16:44,578 --> 01:16:46,877
If Krampus doesn't get you,
your mother probably will.
1026
01:16:46,879 --> 01:16:49,813
God only knows what's worse.
1027
01:16:49,815 --> 01:16:53,083
What happened to the mom?
1028
01:16:53,085 --> 01:16:55,920
She joined those other
three in the nutters wing.
1029
01:17:00,993 --> 01:17:02,626
Do you like Christmas
carols, Peter?
1030
01:17:02,628 --> 01:17:05,530
I don't know that many.
1031
01:17:05,532 --> 01:17:07,898
Just as well.
1032
01:17:07,900 --> 01:17:10,767
Most of them are quite boring.
1033
01:17:10,769 --> 01:17:14,506
I know a few that
are rather good.
1034
01:17:14,508 --> 01:17:22,212
I know one choir who had
a very haunting song.
1035
01:17:22,214 --> 01:17:29,854
This here's a story I like to
call The 12 Kills of Christmas.
1036
01:17:30,524 --> 01:17:31,688
Don't you mean 12
1037
01:17:31,690 --> 01:17:34,057
12 Days of Christmas?
1038
01:17:34,059 --> 01:17:35,727
Oh, no.
1039
01:17:40,666 --> 01:17:45,170
Singers that came to this
house never sang that song.
1040
01:17:51,377 --> 01:17:54,077
To be the guardian
of your incarnate son,
1041
01:17:54,079 --> 01:17:58,516
and husband of the
Blessed Virgin Mary.
1042
01:17:58,518 --> 01:18:02,319
Give us grace to follow him.
1043
01:18:02,321 --> 01:18:03,621
Nearly ready for
midnight mass, father.
1044
01:18:03,623 --> 01:18:04,721
Why?
1045
01:18:04,723 --> 01:18:05,956
Don't I sound very good?
1046
01:18:05,958 --> 01:18:08,091
Oh, no, no, you sound great.
1047
01:18:08,093 --> 01:18:09,727
Anyone would think
you were a priest.
1048
01:18:11,964 --> 01:18:13,497
Thank you, Cathy.
1049
01:18:13,499 --> 01:18:15,166
I'm just going to
clear out the office.
1050
01:18:17,903 --> 01:18:19,404
And faithful.
1051
01:18:24,644 --> 01:18:27,844
Can I help you young man?
1052
01:18:27,846 --> 01:18:31,415
I'm just looking around.
1053
01:18:31,417 --> 01:18:33,951
Does Father McShane
still work here?
1054
01:18:33,953 --> 01:18:38,188
No, he had to retire
suddenly due to his health.
1055
01:18:38,190 --> 01:18:41,091
Is he still
practicing the faith?
1056
01:18:41,093 --> 01:18:44,696
It's a complicated matter.
1057
01:18:44,698 --> 01:18:46,631
You know it's good practice
when in the Lord's house
1058
01:18:46,633 --> 01:18:49,199
to take your hood down.
1059
01:18:49,201 --> 01:18:51,802
Sorry.
1060
01:18:51,804 --> 01:18:53,870
It's been a long time
since I was here.
1061
01:18:53,872 --> 01:18:56,541
We're in a church.
1062
01:18:56,543 --> 01:18:58,208
You used to come here?
1063
01:18:58,210 --> 01:19:00,777
When I was younger, I
used to be in the choir.
1064
01:19:00,779 --> 01:19:03,380
Oh, I see.
1065
01:19:03,382 --> 01:19:05,850
I heard Father McShane's choirs
were the best for miles around.
1066
01:19:07,987 --> 01:19:09,487
I was friends with Dylan Gray.
1067
01:19:17,796 --> 01:19:21,465
Well, how can I help, uh...
1068
01:19:21,467 --> 01:19:22,567
Leo.
1069
01:19:22,569 --> 01:19:24,569
Leo Edwards.
1070
01:19:24,571 --> 01:19:26,403
How can I help, Leo?
1071
01:19:26,405 --> 01:19:29,306
Well, I was hoping I could
talk to Father McShane.
1072
01:19:29,308 --> 01:19:32,242
I'm sorry, he's
suffering from dementia.
1073
01:19:32,244 --> 01:19:35,279
He wouldn't even remember you.
1074
01:19:35,281 --> 01:19:36,814
That's a shame.
1075
01:19:40,720 --> 01:19:42,886
Is there anything
I can help with?
1076
01:19:42,888 --> 01:19:45,789
No, not really.
1077
01:19:45,791 --> 01:19:47,559
Nothing you or
God can do for me.
1078
01:20:05,311 --> 01:20:09,380
Cathy did you
leave this box here?
1079
01:20:11,850 --> 01:20:13,817
No.
1080
01:20:13,819 --> 01:20:16,621
Might be one of the lads from
this morning left it here.
1081
01:20:16,623 --> 01:20:19,056
Hang on.
1082
01:20:19,058 --> 01:20:22,326
I know that box.
1083
01:20:22,328 --> 01:20:24,094
This used to belong to Father
McShane where did you find it?
1084
01:20:24,096 --> 01:20:26,930
It was just left there.
1085
01:20:26,932 --> 01:20:29,232
Oh.
1086
01:20:29,234 --> 01:20:31,335
Do you know anything
about Dylan Gray.
1087
01:20:31,337 --> 01:20:33,738
Dylan Gray, yes.
1088
01:20:33,740 --> 01:20:37,174
He was in terrible trouble that
boy with drugs and stealing.
1089
01:20:37,176 --> 01:20:39,309
Father McShane
tried to help him,
1090
01:20:39,311 --> 01:20:44,381
but he was honored by
the devil that boy, yeah.
1091
01:20:44,383 --> 01:20:49,086
Between you and me, I think he
ran away and killed himself.
1092
01:20:49,088 --> 01:20:51,221
Yeah, it broke Father
McShane's heart.
1093
01:20:51,223 --> 01:20:54,424
He really messed him up.
1094
01:20:54,426 --> 01:20:57,295
Anyway, I best go replace
all the short candlesticks.
1095
01:21:10,844 --> 01:21:12,075
Hello, Maria McShane.
1096
01:21:12,077 --> 01:21:13,377
Hi, Maria.
1097
01:21:13,379 --> 01:21:16,247
It's Father Abel
How's your father?
1098
01:21:18,150 --> 01:21:19,917
Yeah, he's OK.
1099
01:21:25,224 --> 01:21:26,890
It's largely the
same, but I think
1100
01:21:26,892 --> 01:21:30,728
it's going to take a Christmas
miracle for any change.
1101
01:21:30,730 --> 01:21:32,830
I haven't seen you coming
around to church much of late.
1102
01:21:32,832 --> 01:21:34,532
I know.
1103
01:21:34,534 --> 01:21:37,702
It's just what... with
everything and father.
1104
01:21:37,704 --> 01:21:40,404
Oh, no I understand.
1105
01:21:40,406 --> 01:21:42,774
If you ever need
anyone to talk to...
1106
01:21:42,776 --> 01:21:44,107
Thank you.
1107
01:21:44,109 --> 01:21:47,244
That's very kind
of but I think I've
1108
01:21:47,246 --> 01:21:50,147
lost my faith a little bit.
1109
01:21:50,149 --> 01:21:54,085
Well, if you can't talk
to God, please talk to me.
1110
01:21:57,322 --> 01:22:00,290
Look, I've rung up because I
found this old music box I was
1111
01:22:00,292 --> 01:22:03,059
told belonged to your father.
1112
01:22:03,061 --> 01:22:04,796
Music box.
1113
01:22:04,798 --> 01:22:07,031
Yes, so I wondered if
you might like it back.
1114
01:22:15,107 --> 01:22:16,206
It's got a tune.
1115
01:22:16,208 --> 01:22:18,209
All things bright and beautiful.
1116
01:22:20,112 --> 01:22:22,479
No, that's fine.
1117
01:22:22,481 --> 01:22:23,915
Please just get rid
of it or give it
1118
01:22:23,917 --> 01:22:25,717
to a charity shop or something.
1119
01:22:47,707 --> 01:22:50,641
Here we are farther.
1120
01:22:50,643 --> 01:22:52,777
Back here another year.
1121
01:22:52,779 --> 01:22:54,010
Why did she do?
1122
01:22:54,012 --> 01:22:55,345
Why did she leave?
1123
01:22:55,347 --> 01:22:57,214
Because the devil got into her.
1124
01:22:57,216 --> 01:22:59,349
It wasn't her fault.
The devil makes
1125
01:22:59,351 --> 01:23:01,586
us all do bad things at times.
1126
01:23:01,588 --> 01:23:03,554
Did the devil get
her from that box?
1127
01:23:03,556 --> 01:23:06,022
Yes, he did, and that's why
you must never tell anyone
1128
01:23:06,024 --> 01:23:08,926
about it or open it because if
the devil's friends get to find
1129
01:23:08,928 --> 01:23:11,428
out about the box,
they'll release
1130
01:23:11,430 --> 01:23:13,965
the devil for you and
for me and for everyone,
1131
01:23:13,967 --> 01:23:16,366
and then we'll all disappear.
1132
01:23:16,368 --> 01:23:17,969
Like that boy he was never
there that night, Murray.
1133
01:23:17,971 --> 01:23:19,202
What'd I tell you.
1134
01:23:19,204 --> 01:23:21,037
He was a ghost.
1135
01:23:21,039 --> 01:23:23,340
And all must find out the
church is haunted otherwise,
1136
01:23:23,342 --> 01:23:24,942
everyone would be too
afraid to come here,
1137
01:23:24,944 --> 01:23:27,277
and that will make God sad.
1138
01:23:27,279 --> 01:23:29,447
That's right, my darling.
1139
01:23:32,719 --> 01:23:34,685
The church's ghost
must always stay out
1140
01:23:34,687 --> 01:23:39,122
of sight, like the
bodies in these graves.
1141
01:23:39,124 --> 01:23:42,628
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1142
01:24:23,503 --> 01:24:25,268
Come on.
1143
01:24:25,270 --> 01:24:26,838
That's it.
1144
01:24:31,778 --> 01:24:33,277
Try and relax.
1145
01:24:36,049 --> 01:24:37,414
I'll see you in the morning.
1146
01:24:37,416 --> 01:24:39,150
Won't you stop saying it?
1147
01:24:51,798 --> 01:24:54,331
I visited Mother's
grave today with Father.
1148
01:24:54,333 --> 01:24:55,533
It must have been
freezing up there.
1149
01:24:55,535 --> 01:24:57,201
It was.
1150
01:24:59,806 --> 01:25:02,238
Not as cold as the year my
mother passed away there.
1151
01:25:02,240 --> 01:25:03,875
My last white Christmas.
1152
01:25:08,014 --> 01:25:09,548
Are you OK?
1153
01:25:11,116 --> 01:25:12,751
Yeah.
1154
01:25:16,055 --> 01:25:17,589
You don't look OK.
1155
01:25:21,027 --> 01:25:24,461
Maria, what's up.
1156
01:25:24,463 --> 01:25:26,162
Nothing.
1157
01:25:26,164 --> 01:25:27,733
Come here.
1158
01:25:34,641 --> 01:25:36,541
It's nearly our
two-year anniversary.
1159
01:25:42,982 --> 01:25:44,314
I'm just not sure about leaving
1160
01:25:44,316 --> 01:25:46,550
father here for Christmas Eve.
1161
01:25:46,552 --> 01:25:50,921
Maria, you do too much for him.
1162
01:25:50,923 --> 01:25:55,893
The nurse can look after
him tomorrow for one night.
1163
01:25:55,895 --> 01:25:59,897
Besides, he probably doesn't
even know who you are anymore.
1164
01:25:59,899 --> 01:26:00,965
I'm sorry.
1165
01:26:00,967 --> 01:26:02,365
Sorry about that.
1166
01:26:02,367 --> 01:26:05,335
That was harsh.
1167
01:26:05,337 --> 01:26:08,472
No, it's OK.
1168
01:26:11,443 --> 01:26:14,845
Sorry, it's just been
a really weird day.
1169
01:26:14,847 --> 01:26:16,479
I've had a lot of news.
1170
01:26:16,481 --> 01:26:17,949
Anything I should know about?
1171
01:26:26,526 --> 01:26:28,192
Really?
1172
01:26:31,296 --> 01:26:33,898
Oh, my God.
1173
01:26:33,900 --> 01:26:35,433
That's amazing.
1174
01:26:37,937 --> 01:26:40,971
Well, what is it?
1175
01:26:40,973 --> 01:26:43,206
Babe, you're not happy about it.
1176
01:26:43,208 --> 01:26:45,341
No, I am.
1177
01:26:45,343 --> 01:26:46,811
I am.
1178
01:26:46,813 --> 01:26:50,014
It's just we're
having our own child,
1179
01:26:50,016 --> 01:26:52,917
I think I have to
tell you something.
1180
01:26:52,919 --> 01:26:55,351
What?
1181
01:26:55,353 --> 01:26:58,221
Yeah, you can tell me anything.
1182
01:26:58,223 --> 01:27:03,127
Well, before my mother
killed herself that Christmas,
1183
01:27:03,129 --> 01:27:06,163
I heard her and father fighting.
1184
01:27:06,165 --> 01:27:09,900
Apparently, she found something
in a music box he had.
1185
01:27:09,902 --> 01:27:11,702
A music box?
1186
01:27:11,704 --> 01:27:14,304
Yeah.
1187
01:27:14,306 --> 01:27:16,140
I don't know what it was.
1188
01:27:16,142 --> 01:27:21,746
All I know is... is that he
had a fight with a student.
1189
01:27:21,748 --> 01:27:23,547
Do you think anyone's
going to believe you over me,
1190
01:27:23,549 --> 01:27:25,415
a man of God over
some drugged up
1191
01:27:25,417 --> 01:27:27,350
little junkie from the streets?
1192
01:27:27,352 --> 01:27:30,955
His name was Dylan.
1193
01:27:30,957 --> 01:27:32,857
Dad said that he came
back a drug addict
1194
01:27:32,859 --> 01:27:34,925
and tried to
blackmail him, but...
1195
01:27:34,927 --> 01:27:36,426
You think he might have been
involved with his students?
1196
01:27:36,428 --> 01:27:39,930
I don't know.
1197
01:27:39,932 --> 01:27:42,233
I mean, it's... it's a
terrible thing to think about,
1198
01:27:42,235 --> 01:27:47,238
but this rumor is from his
old church saying that he was
1199
01:27:47,240 --> 01:27:49,405
charged with something,
but charges were
1200
01:27:49,407 --> 01:27:52,042
dropped because he's senile.
1201
01:27:52,044 --> 01:27:53,678
Jesus Christ.
1202
01:27:57,650 --> 01:27:59,383
But it's just a rumor.
1203
01:28:01,921 --> 01:28:05,056
Your dad wouldn't
do that, right?
1204
01:28:13,566 --> 01:28:18,269
(VOICEOVER) All things
bright and beautiful,
1205
01:28:18,271 --> 01:28:25,075
all creatures great and small,
all things wise and wonderful
1206
01:28:25,077 --> 01:28:31,282
[CRYING]
1207
01:28:31,284 --> 01:28:32,315
I'll go.
1208
01:28:32,317 --> 01:28:33,217
No, Maria...
1209
01:28:33,219 --> 01:28:35,986
No, you stay.
1210
01:28:35,988 --> 01:28:39,690
Maria, wait.
1211
01:28:39,692 --> 01:28:42,193
I think it's time you start
getting some extra help for him
1212
01:28:42,195 --> 01:28:45,296
after Christmas.
1213
01:28:45,298 --> 01:28:46,865
Seriously.
1214
01:28:52,505 --> 01:28:54,238
Oh, come on, father.
1215
01:28:54,240 --> 01:28:56,140
What are you doing down there.
1216
01:28:56,142 --> 01:28:58,309
You know you can't walk.
1217
01:28:58,311 --> 01:29:01,512
They come for me in the dark.
1218
01:29:01,514 --> 01:29:04,048
They plead with Jesus.
1219
01:29:04,050 --> 01:29:07,483
Nobody's here.
1220
01:29:07,485 --> 01:29:12,355
It was just a nightmare, OK?
1221
01:29:12,357 --> 01:29:17,028
May God mercy on our souls.
1222
01:29:29,342 --> 01:29:33,677
Maria, now what have I told you
about playing in the basement.
1223
01:29:33,679 --> 01:29:34,812
Not to come down here
as it's full of ghosts.
1224
01:29:34,814 --> 01:29:37,014
Exactly.
1225
01:29:37,016 --> 01:29:39,049
Wouldn't the ghosts
be in the graveyard?
1226
01:29:39,051 --> 01:29:42,119
Not all souls are
asleep out there.
1227
01:29:42,121 --> 01:29:43,954
- What's that?
- It's Saint Christopher.
1228
01:29:43,956 --> 01:29:45,089
I think it belonged
to that Dillon boy.
1229
01:29:45,091 --> 01:29:46,422
Give it to me.
1230
01:29:46,424 --> 01:29:49,026
I'll pass it on to the police.
1231
01:29:49,028 --> 01:29:50,594
Now go on upstairs and carry
on cleaning up the silver.
1232
01:29:50,596 --> 01:29:52,097
Sorry, Father.
1233
01:30:06,879 --> 01:30:08,679
Kurt, what are you doing?
1234
01:30:08,681 --> 01:30:11,215
Look what I found.
1235
01:30:11,217 --> 01:30:15,152
Come on, it's the
best time of the year.
1236
01:30:15,154 --> 01:30:21,225
And you and me can
have a little baby.
1237
01:30:21,227 --> 01:30:23,995
What could spoil this Christmas?
1238
01:31:46,279 --> 01:31:49,648
[GASPING]
1239
01:32:09,970 --> 01:32:13,671
I'm just off now, Father.
1240
01:32:13,673 --> 01:32:21,647
OK Kathy I'll see
you tomorrow Cathy.
1241
01:32:42,702 --> 01:32:45,538
Hello.
1242
01:32:45,540 --> 01:32:48,706
Who's there?
1243
01:32:48,708 --> 01:32:50,076
I'll call the police.
1244
01:32:57,384 --> 01:32:58,751
Who the fuck are you?
1245
01:33:00,587 --> 01:33:09,161
[GROANING]
1246
01:33:17,838 --> 01:33:19,304
So he's been fed.
1247
01:33:19,306 --> 01:33:20,638
He just needs to be
helped to bed at night.
1248
01:33:20,640 --> 01:33:22,040
OK, no worries...
1249
01:33:22,042 --> 01:33:24,776
Don't let them stop singing.
1250
01:33:24,778 --> 01:33:26,111
Just ignore that,
it's the only thing he
1251
01:33:26,113 --> 01:33:28,646
says since he's had the stroke.
1252
01:33:28,648 --> 01:33:30,381
Of course.
1253
01:33:30,383 --> 01:33:33,184
Now you guys have a
lovely Christmas Eve.
1254
01:33:33,186 --> 01:33:35,186
We're going to have a great
time, aren't you Mr McShane?
1255
01:33:35,188 --> 01:33:36,688
- Come on we're going to be
late. - OK.
1256
01:33:36,690 --> 01:33:37,655
- Thank you.
- Bye.
1257
01:33:37,657 --> 01:33:39,191
Thank you. Bye.
1258
01:33:51,338 --> 01:33:53,872
Now you're going to be a good
boy, aren't you, Mr. McShane?
1259
01:33:53,874 --> 01:33:55,206
I don't want no shitting
on Christmas Eve,
1260
01:33:55,208 --> 01:33:56,274
do you understand?
1261
01:33:56,276 --> 01:33:57,308
Don't let them
don't stop singing.
1262
01:33:57,310 --> 01:33:58,409
Yeah, yeah.
1263
01:33:58,411 --> 01:34:00,478
That's all you say I know.
1264
01:34:00,480 --> 01:34:02,380
The choir's grown up
now, they're all gone.
1265
01:34:02,382 --> 01:34:04,449
[KNOCKING]
1266
01:34:04,451 --> 01:34:05,584
Go... away.
1267
01:34:05,586 --> 01:34:07,553
(SINGING) Jingle bell, jingle
1268
01:34:07,555 --> 01:34:09,487
I said go away.
1269
01:34:09,489 --> 01:34:13,158
What part of I don't like
Christmas don't you understand?
1270
01:34:13,160 --> 01:34:14,693
That did it.
1271
01:34:17,898 --> 01:34:20,131
Hey, They've gone.
1272
01:34:20,133 --> 01:34:22,167
Mike can you hurry
up and get here.
1273
01:34:22,169 --> 01:34:24,270
I don't want to spend Christmas
alone with this creepy old guy.
1274
01:35:09,783 --> 01:35:11,750
Are you in this?
1275
01:35:19,226 --> 01:35:20,458
If they finally come
back and check on him?
1276
01:35:20,460 --> 01:35:22,160
They won't.
1277
01:35:22,162 --> 01:35:24,495
Look, the daughters
probably asked
1278
01:35:24,497 --> 01:35:27,899
Santa to kill him off just
so she can inherit the house.
1279
01:35:27,901 --> 01:35:29,801
I just... I can't do
this with Father Teddy.
1280
01:35:29,803 --> 01:35:31,270
Can we wheel him
into the other room?
1281
01:35:34,241 --> 01:35:36,374
See no evil.
1282
01:35:36,376 --> 01:35:38,142
Happy now?
1283
01:35:38,144 --> 01:35:39,911
It's like a demented budgie.
1284
01:35:39,913 --> 01:35:40,713
Don't let them stop singing.
1285
01:35:40,715 --> 01:35:42,381
Shut up.
1286
01:35:53,893 --> 01:35:56,861
[KNOCKING]
1287
01:35:56,863 --> 01:35:57,630
Oh, oh...
1288
01:35:57,632 --> 01:35:59,063
Really?
1289
01:35:59,065 --> 01:36:03,401
(SINGING) 10 beautiful,
Oh creatures...
1290
01:36:03,403 --> 01:36:04,536
OK.
1291
01:36:04,538 --> 01:36:07,171
No, just leave him.
1292
01:36:07,173 --> 01:36:10,542
I can't do this with
songs of praise on coming.
1293
01:36:10,544 --> 01:36:15,179
Oh, tell them to sing come
we faithful or something.
1294
01:36:15,181 --> 01:36:16,782
Will be back in one minute.
1295
01:36:28,428 --> 01:36:30,496
Tell your God to stop
screwing with my night, OK?
1296
01:36:39,640 --> 01:36:42,841
There was no one there, so.
1297
01:36:51,484 --> 01:36:54,118
Your cries back, father.
1298
01:36:54,120 --> 01:36:56,188
Time for one last hymn.
1299
01:37:05,365 --> 01:37:07,031
What's wrong?
1300
01:37:07,033 --> 01:37:08,600
It's my dad.
1301
01:37:08,602 --> 01:37:11,102
He's come around.
1302
01:37:11,104 --> 01:37:14,673
What do you mean
he's come around?
1303
01:37:14,675 --> 01:37:18,042
Apparently, he's awake and
wants to make a confession.
1304
01:37:18,044 --> 01:37:19,579
What type of confession?
1305
01:37:22,949 --> 01:37:25,116
Please, this is nothing
to do with me, OK?
1306
01:37:25,118 --> 01:37:26,518
The daughter is on the way.
1307
01:37:26,520 --> 01:37:27,753
I'm innocent, please.
1308
01:37:27,755 --> 01:37:29,188
I haven't done anything.
1309
01:37:34,194 --> 01:37:37,462
What should we do about it?
1310
01:37:37,464 --> 01:37:41,333
[SCREAMS]
1311
01:37:54,815 --> 01:37:56,914
Father.
1312
01:37:56,916 --> 01:37:58,585
Father.
1313
01:38:04,759 --> 01:38:06,157
Where is he?
1314
01:38:06,159 --> 01:38:07,992
I don't know.
1315
01:38:07,994 --> 01:38:09,795
Where's the damn nurse?
1316
01:38:09,797 --> 01:38:11,463
My God.
1317
01:38:28,516 --> 01:38:32,050
[SCREAMS]
1318
01:38:59,880 --> 01:39:01,548
We found this in the graveyard.
1319
01:39:22,870 --> 01:39:25,637
Who are you?
1320
01:39:25,639 --> 01:39:28,206
You know who we are.
1321
01:39:28,208 --> 01:39:30,075
We are fallen angels.
1322
01:39:35,950 --> 01:39:39,183
I don't know what you mean.
1323
01:39:39,185 --> 01:39:41,420
Is that what you
told your boyfriend?
1324
01:39:44,625 --> 01:39:47,459
The time has come for you
to look upon our faces.
1325
01:39:54,334 --> 01:39:56,535
This is one of the
ropes he used to wear,
1326
01:39:56,537 --> 01:39:59,136
well, before taking it off.
1327
01:39:59,138 --> 01:40:02,875
He dead rode Father McShane.
1328
01:40:02,877 --> 01:40:06,645
Don't let them stop singing.
1329
01:40:06,647 --> 01:40:10,616
We should kill her now,
then we can get on with daddy.
1330
01:40:10,618 --> 01:40:11,583
He's never...
1331
01:40:11,585 --> 01:40:13,284
Shush.
1332
01:40:13,286 --> 01:40:15,219
You're just one
more lie to cover up
1333
01:40:15,221 --> 01:40:18,657
for his crimes like the songs.
1334
01:40:18,659 --> 01:40:22,828
Didn't... I didn't know.
1335
01:40:22,830 --> 01:40:24,930
Christian saw what happened
that night in the church
1336
01:40:24,932 --> 01:40:27,231
after choir practice.
1337
01:40:27,233 --> 01:40:28,867
He was late to leave.
1338
01:40:28,869 --> 01:40:31,402
He saw you see it all.
1339
01:40:31,404 --> 01:40:34,205
Things on my mind of you.
1340
01:40:34,207 --> 01:40:38,710
I am a man of God, and
he speaks through me.
1341
01:40:38,712 --> 01:40:40,579
You must never mention
what happened here tonight.
1342
01:40:40,581 --> 01:40:42,446
That boy had the devil in him.
1343
01:40:42,448 --> 01:40:45,784
Your father did
what he had to do.
1344
01:40:45,786 --> 01:40:48,419
Maybe the devil is gone now when
you hit him with that cross.
1345
01:40:48,421 --> 01:40:50,054
Maybe you knocked
the devil out of him.
1346
01:40:50,056 --> 01:40:52,223
I don't think we
can take that risk.
1347
01:40:52,225 --> 01:40:53,391
What are you going to do?
1348
01:40:53,393 --> 01:40:55,627
Nothing you need worry about.
1349
01:40:55,629 --> 01:40:57,829
Now go up to the altar, put
your hands over your ears
1350
01:40:57,831 --> 01:41:00,331
and pray as hard as you can.
1351
01:41:00,333 --> 01:41:02,100
Your father has a late
night song to prepare.
1352
01:41:05,906 --> 01:41:07,807
How your father told
you to say nothing.
1353
01:41:18,184 --> 01:41:20,052
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1354
01:41:20,054 --> 01:41:21,720
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1355
01:41:21,722 --> 01:41:24,590
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1356
01:41:24,592 --> 01:41:26,758
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1357
01:41:26,760 --> 01:41:29,126
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1358
01:41:29,128 --> 01:41:31,530
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1359
01:41:31,532 --> 01:41:34,298
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1360
01:41:34,300 --> 01:41:36,068
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1361
01:41:36,070 --> 01:41:38,169
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1362
01:41:38,171 --> 01:41:40,939
Father is dealing
with the devil.
1363
01:41:40,941 --> 01:41:42,908
Christian, you followed
your father in the graveyard
1364
01:41:42,910 --> 01:41:44,343
where he buried Dylan alive.
1365
01:41:59,627 --> 01:42:02,895
[LAUGHTER]
1366
01:42:41,869 --> 01:42:44,603
We're all too scared
to go to the police.
1367
01:42:44,605 --> 01:42:47,271
Dylan wasn't the only
kid to go missing.
1368
01:42:47,273 --> 01:42:54,947
God only knows how many are
buried in the graves out there.
1369
01:43:11,364 --> 01:43:12,899
The boyfriend looks
awfully nervous.
1370
01:43:16,503 --> 01:43:18,202
His heart is beating too fast,
1371
01:43:18,204 --> 01:43:20,606
Well, we best clean it out then.
1372
01:43:23,610 --> 01:43:25,645
You still got that
toilet cleaner, Joseph.
1373
01:43:30,316 --> 01:43:31,951
Don't.
1374
01:43:37,356 --> 01:43:40,893
[GROANING]
1375
01:43:41,829 --> 01:43:43,863
No, no.
1376
01:43:51,839 --> 01:43:55,339
And now for you.
1377
01:43:55,341 --> 01:43:57,609
Please.
1378
01:43:57,611 --> 01:43:58,978
I'm pregnant, please.
1379
01:44:06,887 --> 01:44:10,757
The evil ends with you.
1380
01:44:13,127 --> 01:44:16,562
[SCREAMING]
1381
01:44:36,884 --> 01:44:41,386
I'll be back in an hour, it's
in God's hands if you live.
1382
01:44:44,691 --> 01:44:46,626
There's no forgiveness
for either of us.
1383
01:44:56,136 --> 01:44:58,004
Don't let stop singing.
1384
01:45:07,446 --> 01:45:10,950
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1385
01:46:07,341 --> 01:46:10,843
[JINGLE BELLS]
1386
01:46:33,100 --> 01:46:34,533
It's all over now.
1387
01:46:38,205 --> 01:46:39,671
What's wrong?
1388
01:46:39,673 --> 01:46:42,807
You look like you've
seen the devil.
1389
01:46:42,809 --> 01:46:46,945
It's a Christmas miracle.
1390
01:46:46,947 --> 01:46:50,815
(SINGING) All things
bright and beautiful,
1391
01:46:50,817 --> 01:46:54,186
all creatures great and small.
1392
01:46:57,157 --> 01:47:01,559
All things wise and
wonderful, the Lord...
1393
01:47:01,561 --> 01:47:03,395
What's the matter?
1394
01:47:03,397 --> 01:47:05,664
Please touch your tongue.
1395
01:47:05,666 --> 01:47:09,935
(SINGING) Each little
flower that opens,
1396
01:47:09,937 --> 01:47:15,240
each little bird that sings.
1397
01:47:15,242 --> 01:47:22,949
He made the colored flowers,
he made their tiny wings.
1398
01:47:25,285 --> 01:47:32,925
All things bright and beautiful,
all creatures great and small.
1399
01:47:34,161 --> 01:47:41,499
All things wise and wonderful,
the Lord God made them all.
1400
01:47:47,741 --> 01:47:51,177
Hear no evil, speak no evil.
1401
01:47:54,381 --> 01:47:55,915
See no evil.
1402
01:48:06,760 --> 01:48:10,462
(SINGING) All things
bright and beautiful,
1403
01:48:10,464 --> 01:48:16,267
all creatures great and small,
all things wise and wonderful,
1404
01:48:16,269 --> 01:48:20,205
the Lord God made them all.
1405
01:48:20,207 --> 01:48:23,675
What do you think of that
lovely little story, Peter?
1406
01:48:23,677 --> 01:48:25,844
You like all the gory bits.
1407
01:48:25,846 --> 01:48:27,346
Aah
1408
01:48:27,348 --> 01:48:28,180
I know.
1409
01:48:28,182 --> 01:48:31,083
Hang on.
1410
01:48:31,085 --> 01:48:33,686
Do you want to hear a
story about a Santa?
1411
01:48:33,688 --> 01:48:35,187
A Santa like you?
1412
01:48:35,189 --> 01:48:37,123
Yes.
1413
01:48:37,125 --> 01:48:38,357
Exactly like me.
1414
01:48:38,359 --> 01:48:41,494
How did you know?
1415
01:48:41,496 --> 01:48:45,364
There was this man, put on a
Christmas outfit every year,
1416
01:48:45,366 --> 01:48:52,973
always tried to keep Christmas
magic, and his wife left him.
1417
01:48:53,841 --> 01:48:58,544
Emma, what are you doing?
1418
01:48:58,546 --> 01:49:00,613
I know this is a shit time of
year to do this to you, Tony.
1419
01:49:00,615 --> 01:49:02,015
What are you talking about?
1420
01:49:04,552 --> 01:49:08,421
I'm so sorry, Tony.
1421
01:49:08,423 --> 01:49:12,191
Mom, why do we have to
stay so late at grandma's?
1422
01:49:12,193 --> 01:49:14,026
Go unpack, Billy, you
ain't going nowhere.
1423
01:49:14,028 --> 01:49:15,895
Billy, don't listen to him.
1424
01:49:15,897 --> 01:49:17,664
Go downstairs and wait for me.
1425
01:49:21,102 --> 01:49:22,802
Do it.
1426
01:49:22,804 --> 01:49:25,271
Go downstairs.
1427
01:49:25,273 --> 01:49:26,673
We'll come and get you.
1428
01:49:30,812 --> 01:49:38,518
Please, Emma, it's Christmas.
1429
01:49:38,520 --> 01:49:41,487
We can work through this.
1430
01:49:41,489 --> 01:49:44,890
You can't fix this.
1431
01:49:44,892 --> 01:49:46,425
This hasn't been real
for a long time, Tony.
1432
01:49:46,427 --> 01:49:49,695
You know that.
1433
01:49:49,697 --> 01:49:51,931
We're bipolar.
1434
01:49:51,933 --> 01:49:53,900
Our marriage is about as
real as you being Santa.
1435
01:49:59,774 --> 01:50:01,641
She even tried to
take his kid too.
1436
01:50:05,813 --> 01:50:10,150
You can go, but you
will not take my son.
1437
01:50:13,488 --> 01:50:15,055
Watch me.
1438
01:50:19,561 --> 01:50:22,596
Mom, I can't find my robot toy.
1439
01:50:22,598 --> 01:50:23,629
Billy, don't worry about it.
1440
01:50:23,631 --> 01:50:25,532
There isn't time.
1441
01:50:25,534 --> 01:50:27,501
Stone, Emma, please.
1442
01:50:27,503 --> 01:50:28,502
For fucks sake.
1443
01:50:28,504 --> 01:50:30,537
Where are my keys
1444
01:50:30,539 --> 01:50:34,541
I will not let you take my
son, not with that bastard.
1445
01:50:34,543 --> 01:50:36,075
Who was it.
1446
01:50:36,077 --> 01:50:38,177
Fine I'm putting on some weight.
1447
01:50:38,179 --> 01:50:39,713
Ridiculous.
1448
01:50:42,884 --> 01:50:44,317
But he wouldn't let her.
1449
01:50:49,223 --> 01:50:54,561
No one's going to take
my son away from me.
1450
01:50:54,563 --> 01:50:57,797
See, Billy, I told you
you weren't going nowhere.
1451
01:51:01,369 --> 01:51:03,403
We've always loved this
tune, ain't we Emma?
1452
01:51:06,642 --> 01:51:08,141
Your mother gave us that box.
1453
01:51:10,378 --> 01:51:12,045
She's next.
1454
01:51:19,420 --> 01:51:20,854
Christmas morning.
1455
01:51:23,625 --> 01:51:28,127
Time to deck the
halls with blood,
1456
01:51:28,129 --> 01:51:30,196
I even took his job away.
1457
01:51:30,198 --> 01:51:32,331
We're sorry, Tony,
we just feel you're
1458
01:51:32,333 --> 01:51:35,434
no longer right for Santa's
happy grotto Incorporated.
1459
01:51:35,436 --> 01:51:40,172
But on five years
running, Santa of the month.
1460
01:51:40,174 --> 01:51:42,642
Well, we only operate
for one month of the year.
1461
01:51:42,644 --> 01:51:45,010
You can't get rid of me.
1462
01:51:45,012 --> 01:51:47,046
Who would replace me?
1463
01:51:47,048 --> 01:51:49,148
Well, actually,
we've already asked
1464
01:51:49,150 --> 01:51:52,284
Richard to take your place.
1465
01:51:52,286 --> 01:51:54,253
Richard.
1466
01:51:54,255 --> 01:51:55,487
Richard.
1467
01:51:55,489 --> 01:51:57,223
Sorry, Tony.
1468
01:51:57,225 --> 01:52:01,727
There's a new Santa in town.
1469
01:52:01,729 --> 01:52:09,168
You cannot be serious, you
can't replace me with that.
1470
01:52:09,170 --> 01:52:12,672
The outfit doesn't even
fit, and he's never held
1471
01:52:12,674 --> 01:52:14,974
more than a grotto in cavern.
1472
01:52:14,976 --> 01:52:17,142
I'm sorry, Tony.
1473
01:52:17,144 --> 01:52:21,847
The decisions being made.
1474
01:52:21,849 --> 01:52:26,252
Well, you can
take away my grotto,
1475
01:52:26,254 --> 01:52:32,391
but you can't take my dignity.
1476
01:52:32,393 --> 01:52:40,066
I am going to take my act,
and my very large bulging sack
1477
01:52:43,437 --> 01:52:51,211
elsewhere, and I'll bet
you're all bloody communists.
1478
01:52:56,317 --> 01:52:59,285
Well, I don't think he's
going to be on my list.
1479
01:52:59,287 --> 01:53:04,691
In the end, the grief and seeing
all those children that weren't
1480
01:53:04,693 --> 01:53:12,365
his drove him and should we
say odd, so we got revenge,
1481
01:53:15,803 --> 01:53:18,270
and handed out festive treats.
1482
01:53:18,272 --> 01:53:21,073
Where are my cookies
from Santa, mommy?
1483
01:53:21,075 --> 01:53:22,542
You can't have them now,
darling, it spoil your meal.
1484
01:53:22,544 --> 01:53:25,244
But look.
1485
01:53:25,246 --> 01:53:27,781
There has already been one
reported fatality here today.
1486
01:53:27,783 --> 01:53:30,684
The police are desperately
seeking anyone who has visited
1487
01:53:30,686 --> 01:53:33,653
the grotto as they believe
that there is poisonous cookies
1488
01:53:33,655 --> 01:53:35,421
handed out by Santa.
1489
01:53:35,423 --> 01:53:37,122
Oh my God.
1490
01:53:37,124 --> 01:53:40,292
The Information right now
is he was a member of ISIS.
1491
01:53:40,294 --> 01:53:44,564
Mommy, you stole my cookies.
1492
01:53:44,566 --> 01:53:46,131
And this elf just came
out screaming at us,
1493
01:53:46,133 --> 01:53:47,333
my youngest is traumatized.
1494
01:53:47,335 --> 01:53:50,537
He was screaming out, stop.
1495
01:53:50,539 --> 01:53:52,338
I will be suing Happy
Santas Grotto, Incorporated.
1496
01:53:52,340 --> 01:53:55,107
This is just not good enough.
1497
01:53:55,109 --> 01:53:56,475
As you can see, we've
had a lot of trauma
1498
01:53:56,477 --> 01:53:57,811
tonight at the grotto.
1499
01:53:57,813 --> 01:53:59,278
We've had one girl
who won't stop
1500
01:53:59,280 --> 01:54:00,979
crying at the sight
of a reindeer,
1501
01:54:00,981 --> 01:54:02,481
and another who tried to
choke herself to death
1502
01:54:02,483 --> 01:54:04,183
with a Tamagotchi.
1503
01:54:04,185 --> 01:54:05,685
She corrected awful
kids on the street.
1504
01:54:05,687 --> 01:54:07,886
Oh, Santa.
1505
01:54:07,888 --> 01:54:09,789
You walking back
to the North Pole
1506
01:54:09,791 --> 01:54:12,125
because you're too fat for your
reindeer to pull your ass back.
1507
01:54:16,197 --> 01:54:17,764
Oh, well, done Leo.
1508
01:54:17,766 --> 01:54:19,532
Now you've pissed off Santa.
1509
01:54:19,534 --> 01:54:20,933
Oh, what's the matter?
1510
01:54:20,935 --> 01:54:22,067
Where's my present?
1511
01:54:22,069 --> 01:54:23,068
I'll leave it out, Leo.
1512
01:54:23,070 --> 01:54:24,403
Look at him.
1513
01:54:24,405 --> 01:54:26,138
He's obviously had
a bad Christmas.
1514
01:54:26,140 --> 01:54:28,340
So would I dressed up like that.
1515
01:54:28,342 --> 01:54:30,643
Oh, I'm having a
bad Christmas too.
1516
01:54:30,645 --> 01:54:32,746
That's why I want my present.
1517
01:54:32,748 --> 01:54:35,447
You don't know nothing
about a bad Christmas, kid.
1518
01:54:35,449 --> 01:54:36,215
Just leave him.
1519
01:54:36,217 --> 01:54:37,784
He's been drinking.
1520
01:54:37,786 --> 01:54:38,884
Come on guys, let's go.
1521
01:54:38,886 --> 01:54:39,985
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1522
01:54:39,987 --> 01:54:42,187
Through the window, I can the...
1523
01:54:42,189 --> 01:54:44,056
What did you say?
1524
01:54:44,058 --> 01:54:50,162
No, I've something
in my sack for you.
1525
01:54:50,164 --> 01:54:51,598
I think he's had
some funny mince pies.
1526
01:54:51,600 --> 01:54:52,599
He's getting creepy.
1527
01:54:52,601 --> 01:54:53,733
Come on, let's go.
1528
01:54:53,735 --> 01:54:56,001
You being funny.
1529
01:54:56,003 --> 01:54:58,705
Not feeling very
jolly this Christmas.
1530
01:54:58,707 --> 01:55:00,005
Jesus Christ.
1531
01:55:00,007 --> 01:55:02,041
I'm not Jesus, I'm Santa.
1532
01:55:04,880 --> 01:55:06,446
Went round all the houses.
1533
01:55:09,316 --> 01:55:11,818
Oh, dad, what are you doing.
1534
01:55:11,820 --> 01:55:13,720
You just got us killed.
1535
01:55:13,722 --> 01:55:17,891
No dear, it's you not riding
your reindeer zombie right.
1536
01:55:17,893 --> 01:55:19,626
I'm riding it fine.
1537
01:55:19,628 --> 01:55:20,993
You need to stop dying
on exploding presents.
1538
01:55:20,995 --> 01:55:22,562
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1539
01:55:22,564 --> 01:55:27,634
Bring me too, we can fall
in love With Christmas
1540
01:55:27,636 --> 01:55:35,576
if we want to one by one
the family start rising.
1541
01:55:39,614 --> 01:55:40,747
It's Santa.
1542
01:55:40,749 --> 01:55:43,182
The real Santa is here.
1543
01:55:43,184 --> 01:55:44,249
There's no one there, Ben.
1544
01:55:44,251 --> 01:55:45,984
But I swear it was him.
1545
01:55:45,986 --> 01:55:48,621
He was real.
1546
01:55:48,623 --> 01:55:51,089
I think Josh scared you a
little bit too much earlier.
1547
01:55:51,091 --> 01:55:52,525
No one believes
me in this house.
1548
01:55:52,527 --> 01:55:54,794
You suck.
1549
01:55:54,796 --> 01:55:57,496
I hate you guys, Christmas.
1550
01:55:57,498 --> 01:55:59,264
Ben.
1551
01:55:59,266 --> 01:56:02,034
I'm going to go
play my video game.
1552
01:56:02,036 --> 01:56:03,536
And what about
the Christmas cake?
1553
01:56:03,538 --> 01:56:04,871
Christmas cake is
more likely to kill me
1554
01:56:04,873 --> 01:56:06,673
than to kill our elves.
1555
01:56:06,675 --> 01:56:08,208
Oh, thanks.
1556
01:56:10,812 --> 01:56:12,946
For a wonderful Christmas.
1557
01:56:12,948 --> 01:56:14,380
Killing families.
1558
01:56:17,752 --> 01:56:19,819
You've got some giant bits.
1559
01:56:19,821 --> 01:56:25,424
[SINISTER LAUGHTER]
1560
01:56:25,426 --> 01:56:28,228
You like Christmas games
where people get killed, kid.
1561
01:56:34,335 --> 01:56:37,303
How about Santa brings
you a real game this year?
1562
01:56:39,708 --> 01:56:41,508
And telling kids
stories to cover up
1563
01:56:41,510 --> 01:56:43,710
the real horrific
story he was carrying.
1564
01:56:43,712 --> 01:56:46,111
Hello, Benny boy.
1565
01:56:46,113 --> 01:56:48,481
Santa has come to
pay you a visit.
1566
01:56:52,219 --> 01:56:53,953
What happened to him?
1567
01:56:53,955 --> 01:56:57,790
Jeffrey Dahmer,
1568
01:56:57,792 --> 01:57:00,561
[LAUGHTER]
1569
01:57:04,298 --> 01:57:09,434
This is so funny, Where's
your finger to film?
1570
01:57:09,436 --> 01:57:11,938
It's... it's a bit different
to Rudolph's great.
1571
01:57:11,940 --> 01:57:14,139
Happy Christmas adventure.
1572
01:57:14,141 --> 01:57:17,376
Though I'd come round here,
and be like the three ghosts
1573
01:57:17,378 --> 01:57:20,212
of Christmas, all
rolled into one
1574
01:57:20,214 --> 01:57:26,118
and tell you three
great Christmas stories.
1575
01:57:26,120 --> 01:57:28,621
I got you a special copy.
1576
01:57:28,623 --> 01:57:30,255
Really.
1577
01:57:30,257 --> 01:57:33,158
My parents wouldn't
even let me watch TV.
1578
01:57:33,160 --> 01:57:36,328
No, don't worry about it.
1579
01:57:36,330 --> 01:57:38,397
I've sorted it all
out with your parents.
1580
01:57:38,399 --> 01:57:41,400
This film is banned
in 27 countries,
1581
01:57:41,402 --> 01:57:44,737
so hasn't got any rating.
1582
01:57:44,739 --> 01:57:50,176
This is the last
present of Luke Everard.
1583
01:57:53,048 --> 01:57:56,348
It's freaks out here, and
they sense it too, you know,
1584
01:57:56,350 --> 01:57:57,851
it's shocking.
1585
01:58:03,658 --> 01:58:11,496
I think I've cheered
you up enough parents
1586
01:58:11,498 --> 01:58:13,900
you're feeling better now.
1587
01:58:13,902 --> 01:58:15,501
You've got to help me.
1588
01:58:15,503 --> 01:58:17,737
The Santa broke into
our house, and then he
1589
01:58:17,739 --> 01:58:20,940
started telling me all these
crazy Christmas stories.
1590
01:58:20,942 --> 01:58:22,610
And he's got this huge...
1591
01:58:25,346 --> 01:58:31,383
You didn't ask the
bill payer's permission,
1592
01:58:31,385 --> 01:58:33,920
and now she's dead.
1593
01:58:33,922 --> 01:58:36,624
But that's still no excuse.
1594
01:58:39,561 --> 01:58:40,994
Does funny things
with the head when
1595
01:58:40,996 --> 01:58:43,596
a father loses their child.
1596
01:58:43,598 --> 01:58:45,330
Worse than any child's
new computer game.
1597
01:58:45,332 --> 01:58:46,833
You can kill as
many kids as you like,
1598
01:58:46,835 --> 01:58:48,133
and get rewarded
with extra bullets.
1599
01:58:48,135 --> 01:58:50,903
[LAUGHTER]
1600
01:58:50,905 --> 01:58:53,438
And worse than all the
gory toys in a world,
1601
01:58:53,440 --> 01:58:54,974
you can put him up
on a shelf with all
1602
01:58:54,976 --> 01:58:56,610
the others I bought you.
1603
01:59:01,281 --> 01:59:03,348
He even stopped
enjoying a carols.
1604
01:59:03,350 --> 01:59:05,918
Goulet singing.
1605
01:59:05,920 --> 01:59:07,486
I've ripped out a
vocal cords of people
1606
01:59:07,488 --> 01:59:09,188
who sang better than that.
1607
01:59:11,826 --> 01:59:14,060
Many of you put on
a Santa costume,
1608
01:59:14,062 --> 01:59:17,295
people think they can
take bloody liberties,
1609
01:59:17,297 --> 01:59:19,566
although the mince pies
are a bit of a bonus.
1610
01:59:34,816 --> 01:59:37,050
Delicious.
1611
01:59:37,052 --> 01:59:38,751
Don't worry, Ben.
1612
01:59:38,753 --> 01:59:40,520
Those, social
workers aren't going
1613
01:59:40,522 --> 01:59:44,090
to take you and the other
kids away ever again.
1614
01:59:44,092 --> 01:59:45,658
You're going to spend
Christmas Day with me.
1615
01:59:45,660 --> 01:59:49,028
[LAUGHTER]
1616
01:59:49,030 --> 01:59:52,498
And we are going to have
the best Christmas ever.
1617
01:59:55,503 --> 02:00:02,608
No justice for
fathers, you know.
1618
02:00:02,610 --> 02:00:05,611
Not even Father Christmas.
1619
02:00:05,613 --> 02:00:07,446
You could blame
a man for letting
1620
02:00:07,448 --> 02:00:09,381
himself go putting on
weight, stopping shaving,
1621
02:00:09,383 --> 02:00:11,951
and running away to a
desolate cold landscape
1622
02:00:11,953 --> 02:00:14,487
with thousands of made up
little creatures creating toys.
1623
02:00:19,226 --> 02:00:27,000
Toys his child we'll
never play with.
1624
02:00:31,973 --> 02:00:37,375
That is why I carry a
machete like this in my bag.
1625
02:00:37,377 --> 02:00:40,847
Peter, where are you?
1626
02:00:40,849 --> 02:00:46,351
You stay while I go
and sort your mom out.
1627
02:00:46,353 --> 02:00:48,621
While he was
finishing off my family,
1628
02:00:48,623 --> 02:00:50,858
I managed to escape
into the snow.
1629
02:00:56,030 --> 02:00:57,663
I wish people would just accept
1630
02:00:57,665 --> 02:01:00,365
where they're going to die.
1631
02:01:00,367 --> 02:01:02,034
Christmas is hard
enough without them
1632
02:01:02,036 --> 02:01:03,904
fucking clinging on to life.
1633
02:01:11,311 --> 02:01:14,948
Peter, where are
you you little shit?
1634
02:01:20,555 --> 02:01:25,490
Peter, I've got a nice
little present for you,
1635
02:01:25,492 --> 02:01:30,495
Peter come on out.
1636
02:01:30,497 --> 02:01:32,999
I know you're here somewhere.
1637
02:01:33,001 --> 02:01:35,201
Peter.
1638
02:01:35,203 --> 02:01:36,837
Peter.
1639
02:01:43,845 --> 02:01:46,914
Kids these days, all
of them, little shits.
1640
02:02:06,134 --> 02:02:09,268
I know you're in there.
1641
02:02:09,270 --> 02:02:12,940
I'm going to skin you alive
like Peter fucking rabbit.
1642
02:02:27,655 --> 02:02:30,389
Jesus is going to
save you now kid.
1643
02:03:07,128 --> 02:03:11,764
[GASPING]
1644
02:03:11,766 --> 02:03:14,067
That's when I stabbed him
with the machete he dropped.
1645
02:03:37,792 --> 02:03:40,593
And that's the Christmas I
found out Santa is not real.
1646
02:03:40,595 --> 02:03:42,495
He's a mental psychopath.
1647
02:03:55,576 --> 02:04:01,213
Then I ended up here,
in this children's home.
1648
02:04:01,215 --> 02:04:03,316
Santa is coming for you.
1649
02:04:03,318 --> 02:04:04,617
Nearly Christmas time again.
1650
02:04:04,619 --> 02:04:06,585
Leave me alone.
1651
02:04:06,587 --> 02:04:07,954
He finished off
your family and now
1652
02:04:07,956 --> 02:04:09,221
he's going to finish off you.
1653
02:04:09,223 --> 02:04:10,823
Stop him.
1654
02:04:10,825 --> 02:04:12,457
He's going to skin you
alive like Peter rabbit.
1655
02:04:12,459 --> 02:04:14,193
Stop it.
1656
02:04:14,195 --> 02:04:17,863
On the 12th killer Christmas
Day Santa said to me,
1657
02:04:17,865 --> 02:04:20,968
a dead family in a fern tree.
1658
02:04:24,839 --> 02:04:27,306
Can you hear a sleigh
coming with all the dead kids.
1659
02:04:27,308 --> 02:04:28,607
Halt Harry, leave him alone.
1660
02:04:28,609 --> 02:04:29,742
Don't worry.
1661
02:04:29,744 --> 02:04:30,710
We're done anyway.
1662
02:04:30,712 --> 02:04:32,713
Yeah, little pussy.
1663
02:04:42,657 --> 02:04:45,858
Try and ignore them, Peter.
1664
02:04:45,860 --> 02:04:49,428
They aren't seeing their
families either this Christmas.
1665
02:04:49,430 --> 02:04:51,263
Their families were murdered.
1666
02:04:51,265 --> 02:04:53,332
At least your family wanted you.
1667
02:04:53,334 --> 02:04:56,369
My crack addict mom would
rather be in prison.
1668
02:04:56,371 --> 02:05:00,373
Christmas can go fuck itself.
1669
02:05:00,375 --> 02:05:04,077
We never going to
escape Christmas, are we?
1670
02:05:25,868 --> 02:05:30,404
What the hell are you
doing you little creep?
1671
02:05:30,406 --> 02:05:31,806
You trying to scare me?
1672
02:05:35,110 --> 02:05:36,744
Holt?
1673
02:05:57,032 --> 02:05:59,534
You were always
nice to me, so...
1674
02:05:59,536 --> 02:06:01,768
And so let you live.
1675
02:06:01,770 --> 02:06:04,872
Think of it as my
Christmas present.
1676
02:06:16,852 --> 02:06:20,921
Yeah, might need it.
1677
02:06:20,923 --> 02:06:22,890
It is Christmas Day
tomorrow after all.
1678
02:06:27,530 --> 02:06:29,696
Have a Merry Christmas.
1679
02:06:29,698 --> 02:06:30,864
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1680
02:06:30,866 --> 02:06:36,403
The animals have turned white.
1681
02:06:36,405 --> 02:06:42,909
Santa is dropping bombs
tonight, it's getting cold,
1682
02:06:42,911 --> 02:06:49,249
here's the snow, and I
know you won't be home,
1683
02:06:49,251 --> 02:06:54,654
I'm changing you
in fall out light,
1684
02:06:54,656 --> 02:06:59,025
and I can see your
lips turning blue,
1685
02:06:59,027 --> 02:07:06,701
I shouldn't have fallen in
love with a homicidal Eskimo.
1686
02:07:08,170 --> 02:07:15,843
I see her bubble off the wall,
hanging down from a tree.
1687
02:07:17,246 --> 02:07:25,019
I see her bubble off the
wall, hung in a pagan dream.
1688
02:07:28,724 --> 02:07:36,263
The reindeer heads all looked
out they would be pulling out
1689
02:07:36,265 --> 02:07:43,905
of town, sat in this old leather
chair, my hunting rifle loaded
1690
02:07:45,207 --> 02:07:51,912
here, watching us
far from the sky,
1691
02:07:51,914 --> 02:07:56,249
we're three feet deep
in dust and bones.
1692
02:07:56,251 --> 02:08:03,891
None of the children gone to
war, I got to be coming home.
1693
02:08:05,394 --> 02:08:13,034
I see her bubble off the wall,
hanging out from a my tree.
1694
02:08:14,504 --> 02:08:22,176
I see a bubble off the
wall, hung in a pagan dream.
1695
02:08:26,215 --> 02:08:33,921
The misteletoe and your smiles,
dancing pretty in rubble,
1696
02:08:35,123 --> 02:08:41,328
the antlers that you like to
wear, before you cross yourself
1697
02:08:41,330 --> 02:08:44,297
and lift his head.
1698
02:08:44,299 --> 02:08:51,906
I see her bubble of the wall,
hanging down I'm from a tree.
1699
02:08:53,475 --> 02:09:00,881
I see her bubble off the
wall hung in the pagan dream.
1700
02:09:04,721 --> 02:09:12,393
I see her bubble off the wall,
hanging down from a tree,
1701
02:09:13,428 --> 02:09:21,235
I see her bubble off the
wall, hung in a pagan dream.
118398
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