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1
00:00:39,580 --> 00:00:42,959
I'm gonna rip out your spleen
and feed it to your husband!
2
00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:44,461
Wouldn't want that.
3
00:00:44,544 --> 00:00:45,963
Yikes, Morty, we'd better run
4
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,798
before it figures out
what a husband is.
5
00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:50,718
This... this carnival of nightmares
used to be scary, right?
6
00:00:51,135 --> 00:00:53,054
- We've seen too much.
- It sucks, you know
7
00:00:53,138 --> 00:00:54,181
'cause it's fun
8
00:00:54,264 --> 00:00:55,432
to break off a scare
now and then.
9
00:00:55,516 --> 00:00:56,642
Did I hear you fellas wishin'
10
00:00:56,725 --> 00:00:59,020
for some good ol' fashioned scares?
11
00:00:59,103 --> 00:01:00,897
I mean, I more wish
you wouldn't eavesdrop.
12
00:01:00,980 --> 00:01:02,023
Yeah, who are you?
13
00:01:02,107 --> 00:01:03,692
Does the suit mean you work here
14
00:01:03,775 --> 00:01:05,277
or that you
super don't work here?
15
00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:06,403
Like yourselves
16
00:01:06,487 --> 00:01:08,114
I'm a connoisseur of fear.
17
00:01:08,197 --> 00:01:09,616
I'm also originally from Earth.
18
00:01:09,699 --> 00:01:11,576
And did you know Earth is the home
19
00:01:11,660 --> 00:01:13,203
of the single scariest place
20
00:01:13,287 --> 00:01:14,329
in the galaxy?
21
00:01:14,413 --> 00:01:15,497
I can show you if you like.
22
00:01:15,873 --> 00:01:17,416
We were headed that way anyway.
23
00:01:18,710 --> 00:01:19,961
Take a left. Almost there.
24
00:01:20,045 --> 00:01:21,254
We know where Earth is.
25
00:01:21,338 --> 00:01:22,547
For guys like you, you know
26
00:01:22,631 --> 00:01:23,674
who've seen it all
27
00:01:23,757 --> 00:01:24,800
there's only a few
28
00:01:24,884 --> 00:01:26,636
real fears left to conquer.
29
00:01:26,719 --> 00:01:30,432
And one of them is right down here.
30
00:01:33,519 --> 00:01:34,562
Okay, what the hell?
31
00:01:34,645 --> 00:01:35,938
Yeah, this is punching down.
32
00:01:36,022 --> 00:01:37,065
Denny's is a nice chain
33
00:01:37,148 --> 00:01:38,316
that gives people starchy food
34
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:39,818
- when they're up late.
- It's a hack joke, buddy.
35
00:01:39,901 --> 00:01:41,653
No, this is the place.
36
00:01:42,279 --> 00:01:43,990
Good luck to both of you.
I'm gonna get myself a slam.
37
00:01:44,824 --> 00:01:46,743
He just wanted a ride, right?
38
00:01:46,826 --> 00:01:48,036
He certainly took us for one.
39
00:01:49,037 --> 00:01:50,789
Welp, as long as we're here.
40
00:01:51,582 --> 00:01:53,793
Okay, Lumberjack Slam,
Grand Slamwhich
41
00:01:53,876 --> 00:01:55,879
Pancake Puppies,
Slamburger, two milkshakes
42
00:01:55,962 --> 00:01:57,339
and an order of Cheddar Tots.
43
00:01:57,422 --> 00:01:58,507
Let me know
when you want your check.
44
00:01:58,590 --> 00:02:00,759
And if you're here for The Hole,
it's in the men's bathroom.
45
00:02:00,843 --> 00:02:01,969
- The what now?
- Hole?
46
00:02:02,053 --> 00:02:03,930
The Fear Hole. Men's bathroom.
47
00:02:14,859 --> 00:02:16,278
Well, it's definitely a hole.
48
00:02:16,361 --> 00:02:17,404
They weren't lying about that.
49
00:02:17,487 --> 00:02:19,615
Is that hair? Seaweed?
50
00:02:19,824 --> 00:02:22,410
Boy, it's really circling
the whole rim, huh.
51
00:02:22,493 --> 00:02:23,536
Guess you gotta jump in
52
00:02:23,620 --> 00:02:24,996
without touching the sides?
53
00:02:25,330 --> 00:02:26,498
You think there's spikes
on the bottom?
54
00:02:26,582 --> 00:02:27,624
I don't think they want you
55
00:02:27,708 --> 00:02:28,792
to go in there and just die.
56
00:02:28,876 --> 00:02:30,044
What kind of business
would that be?
57
00:02:30,127 --> 00:02:31,295
Well, they're not drowning in money.
58
00:02:31,379 --> 00:02:33,298
They still have a built-in TV-VCR.
59
00:02:34,257 --> 00:02:35,425
Hey, it's that carnival guy.
60
00:02:35,509 --> 00:02:36,885
Oh, so he gets a kickback.
61
00:02:36,969 --> 00:02:38,262
Hi. Welcome to The Hole.
62
00:02:38,345 --> 00:02:40,181
Here's how it works.
You jump in.
63
00:02:40,264 --> 00:02:42,142
The Hole manifests
your greatest fear.
64
00:02:42,225 --> 00:02:44,937
You conquer that fear,
and come out, well, fearless.
65
00:02:45,395 --> 00:02:46,814
And you get your picture on the wall.
66
00:02:47,231 --> 00:02:48,399
What does The Hole get out of it?
67
00:02:48,482 --> 00:02:51,736
Well, you know those fish
that nibble dead skin off your feet?
68
00:02:51,820 --> 00:02:53,280
Yeah, the Hole's kinda like that.
69
00:02:53,363 --> 00:02:55,491
It eats fear. You win. It wins.
70
00:02:55,574 --> 00:02:57,410
Have fun, and enjoy the Ho...
71
00:02:58,494 --> 00:03:01,540
Hey Gaddafi, cool your jets
with a taste of Mountain Dew!
72
00:03:01,748 --> 00:03:03,625
This has been here since VHS tapes
73
00:03:03,709 --> 00:03:05,211
and there's only three photos?
74
00:03:05,294 --> 00:03:06,754
Yeah, my tots are getting cold.
75
00:03:06,837 --> 00:03:08,172
So you don't wanna do it?
76
00:03:08,256 --> 00:03:09,507
- Do you?
- I mean...
77
00:03:09,591 --> 00:03:11,885
it says it takes away
your greatest fear.
78
00:03:11,969 --> 00:03:13,178
My greatest fear, Morty
79
00:03:13,262 --> 00:03:15,306
is trusting a gross hole
to conquer my fear
80
00:03:15,389 --> 00:03:17,308
and I conquer that fear
by walking away.
81
00:03:17,392 --> 00:03:18,935
Okay, fine.
82
00:03:21,021 --> 00:03:22,064
You little turd!
83
00:03:24,901 --> 00:03:25,943
Oh, god!
84
00:03:26,027 --> 00:03:27,904
Oh, god!
85
00:03:30,324 --> 00:03:33,327
Hold still
while I stuff you with maggots!
86
00:03:33,411 --> 00:03:36,289
Rick!
87
00:03:36,706 --> 00:03:39,710
Okay, The Hole thinks I'm scared
of not having a gun?
88
00:03:42,296 --> 00:03:43,798
Fear conquered!
89
00:03:45,008 --> 00:03:46,509
Check out them gains!
90
00:03:46,593 --> 00:03:48,011
Morty! Where are you, Morty?
91
00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:49,596
Let's go!
92
00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:51,557
- Oh, jeez! Oh, god. Oh, jeez!
- Oh, man!
93
00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:52,683
We both shit our pants!
94
00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:54,519
- What a fucking ride!
- Christ, Rick! My... my button.
95
00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:56,146
Maggots in... in my button!
96
00:03:56,229 --> 00:03:58,190
Fuck yeah!
On the wall, motherfuckers!
97
00:03:58,273 --> 00:03:59,984
It's not worth it! Not worth it!
98
00:04:03,238 --> 00:04:05,031
Oh, my god, you both reek.
99
00:04:05,115 --> 00:04:06,783
- What is that?
- Morty and I shit our pants.
100
00:04:06,867 --> 00:04:09,286
You're looking at the two newest
members of the Hole Club.
101
00:04:09,829 --> 00:04:11,205
Okay, sluts.
102
00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:13,208
What the hell?
103
00:04:13,291 --> 00:04:16,420
Bomb almost killed her.
104
00:04:16,503 --> 00:04:19,423
Take care of our wife.
105
00:04:20,466 --> 00:04:22,802
Rick. No! Oh, my god.
106
00:04:22,886 --> 00:04:24,137
No. No!
107
00:04:24,221 --> 00:04:25,889
- Mom?
- Where am I?
108
00:04:26,181 --> 00:04:27,433
Who are you people?
109
00:04:27,516 --> 00:04:29,811
You're my mom, but you're young?
110
00:04:29,894 --> 00:04:31,479
Rick, what's happening?
111
00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:33,398
Wait. Rick?
112
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:36,151
What the fuck, Grandpa?
Say something!
113
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:37,653
Okay, we're clearly
still in the hole.
114
00:04:37,737 --> 00:04:40,073
- That's exactly what I was thinking.
- We never left the hole and...
115
00:04:40,156 --> 00:04:42,033
And part of the hole is thinking
you left the hole and then...
116
00:04:42,117 --> 00:04:43,160
And then it can really dig
into you...
117
00:04:43,243 --> 00:04:45,830
Because you can't really be scared
of anything if you know you're...
118
00:04:45,913 --> 00:04:47,623
- Still in the hole.
- Still in the hole.
119
00:04:47,707 --> 00:04:49,083
What the fuck are you two
talking about?
120
00:04:49,167 --> 00:04:51,294
Why is dead Grandma
alive in our living room?
121
00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:52,713
Rick, why are you old?
122
00:04:52,796 --> 00:04:53,964
All great questions.
123
00:04:54,048 --> 00:04:56,300
You guys get reacquainted
while we grab some equipment.
124
00:04:56,884 --> 00:04:59,596
Wait, are we sure this isn't,
like, a double mislead?
125
00:04:59,679 --> 00:05:01,849
A double mislead like we went
into a generic fear hole
126
00:05:01,932 --> 00:05:03,851
and then coincidentally
came home to that?
127
00:05:03,934 --> 00:05:05,895
That's... that's my wife.
128
00:05:05,978 --> 00:05:07,522
From the day I lost her.
129
00:05:07,605 --> 00:05:09,149
Well, what's it got to do with me?
130
00:05:10,692 --> 00:05:11,735
- Rick?
- Right.
131
00:05:11,819 --> 00:05:13,195
I think I figured it out, Morty.
132
00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:16,157
Your greatest fear is me getting
Diane back and being happy again.
133
00:05:16,241 --> 00:05:18,451
- What? Why?
- Because then I won't need you.
134
00:05:18,535 --> 00:05:19,995
Look how scared
you're getting just talking about it.
135
00:05:20,078 --> 00:05:21,914
I'm not scared. I'm insulted.
136
00:05:21,997 --> 00:05:23,916
What kind of backhanded-ass
theory is that?
137
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:25,877
My greatest fear is you hooking up?
138
00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:28,588
You're right, we can't know for sure
until I get more data.
139
00:05:28,672 --> 00:05:31,550
All right, family, who wants to
catch up over ice cream?
140
00:05:32,176 --> 00:05:34,637
I knew he was working
on teleportation.
141
00:05:34,721 --> 00:05:36,848
But wouldn't this be time travel?
142
00:05:36,932 --> 00:05:40,019
Oh, Dad never touches time travel.
He calls it the Long...
143
00:05:40,102 --> 00:05:42,271
Long Island Iced Tea
of science fiction.
144
00:05:42,355 --> 00:05:44,482
Yes, but then what... what is this?
145
00:05:44,566 --> 00:05:45,692
Don't worry about it, it's not real.
146
00:05:45,775 --> 00:05:48,237
Okay, I figure it's better to do this
in front of you.
147
00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:49,864
I... I didn't wanna walk in
de-aged.
148
00:05:49,947 --> 00:05:51,657
What do you think, D? 45? Younger?
149
00:05:51,741 --> 00:05:53,535
I don't care about your age, Rick.
150
00:05:53,618 --> 00:05:54,703
I don't even wanna call you that.
151
00:05:54,786 --> 00:05:57,665
That's my husband's name,
he just died.
152
00:05:57,748 --> 00:05:58,791
I know.
153
00:05:58,874 --> 00:06:00,209
So, 27?
154
00:06:00,293 --> 00:06:02,086
Dad. You're traumatizing her.
155
00:06:02,170 --> 00:06:03,421
What? It's my face too.
156
00:06:03,505 --> 00:06:06,717
And now Diane gets to understand
that I'm still sexy and a genius.
157
00:06:06,925 --> 00:06:07,968
What a kindness.
158
00:06:08,052 --> 00:06:10,680
You were right, Rick.
I'm really terrified right now.
159
00:06:10,763 --> 00:06:12,098
Terrified of what?
160
00:06:12,182 --> 00:06:15,602
If you don't mind, I'd like to get
to know the adult version of my...
161
00:06:15,978 --> 00:06:17,021
Oh, my god.
162
00:06:17,605 --> 00:06:19,023
Where's my real daughter?
163
00:06:19,107 --> 00:06:20,316
Sweetie, it's all right.
164
00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:21,943
This may as well be our real daughter
165
00:06:22,027 --> 00:06:23,487
because she's just as real as you.
166
00:06:23,570 --> 00:06:24,613
- What?
- Put it this way.
167
00:06:24,696 --> 00:06:26,282
You're all basically NPCs.
168
00:06:26,365 --> 00:06:28,910
Only Morty and I are real,
so your side quests don't matter.
169
00:06:28,993 --> 00:06:30,620
The main quest is us.
170
00:06:30,704 --> 00:06:31,747
You're disgusting.
171
00:06:31,830 --> 00:06:34,625
You're talking about our baby girl
like she's theoretical?
172
00:06:34,708 --> 00:06:35,960
Welcome to the family.
173
00:06:36,043 --> 00:06:37,170
No, you don't get it, honey.
174
00:06:37,253 --> 00:06:38,296
Even if this was real
175
00:06:38,379 --> 00:06:39,798
she'd be only a version
of your daughter
176
00:06:39,881 --> 00:06:41,007
who could also be a clone
of your daughter.
177
00:06:41,091 --> 00:06:43,177
Stop wearing my husband's face!
178
00:06:43,260 --> 00:06:44,470
You're nothing like him!
179
00:06:44,553 --> 00:06:45,763
Because I lost you!
180
00:06:45,847 --> 00:06:47,807
Maybe you didn't deserve me!
181
00:06:53,272 --> 00:06:54,690
You wanna hear a new theory?
182
00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:56,776
Maybe your greatest fear
183
00:06:56,860 --> 00:06:59,529
is getting a second chance with her
and blowing it.
184
00:06:59,613 --> 00:07:01,490
You don't think that fear's
been pretty well faced?
185
00:07:01,573 --> 00:07:03,284
Then you haven't conquered it.
186
00:07:03,367 --> 00:07:04,994
Or accepted it.
187
00:07:05,370 --> 00:07:06,496
- Or something.
- "Or something"?
188
00:07:06,579 --> 00:07:07,622
I'm not a fearologist!
189
00:07:07,706 --> 00:07:09,249
Morty, all rom-coms have an arc.
190
00:07:09,333 --> 00:07:11,710
Even You've Got Mail begins with
Tom Hanks killing that cop.
191
00:07:11,794 --> 00:07:12,837
- Really?
- I don't know.
192
00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:14,339
I'm not gonna fucking watch
You've Got Mail.
193
00:07:14,422 --> 00:07:16,007
I'm doing this for you, Morty.
194
00:07:16,091 --> 00:07:17,134
The sooner I get her back
195
00:07:17,217 --> 00:07:20,346
the sooner you can conquer your fear
of being a useless, lonely turd.
196
00:07:20,721 --> 00:07:22,598
You don't think that's been faced?
197
00:07:27,771 --> 00:07:30,149
Hello, Diane
Here's the song I rehearsed
198
00:07:30,232 --> 00:07:32,860
You had a bad day
And Rick made it worse
199
00:07:32,944 --> 00:07:35,238
He felt bad, so he created me
200
00:07:35,322 --> 00:07:37,950
I deliver you waffles and an apology
201
00:07:38,409 --> 00:07:40,703
Why do I have memories
Of being a human child?
202
00:07:40,786 --> 00:07:42,121
- Why would I need...
- Shit...
203
00:07:42,205 --> 00:07:44,207
Goddamn it, there was
a whole second verse
204
00:07:44,291 --> 00:07:46,043
about inviting you to the zoo
with the family.
205
00:07:46,126 --> 00:07:48,796
I've seen that robot's arms.
206
00:07:48,879 --> 00:07:50,548
Yeah, I used them on
a law enforcement drone
207
00:07:50,631 --> 00:07:51,841
that the feds had me build.
208
00:07:51,925 --> 00:07:52,968
It's how we...
209
00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:54,887
How I met my wife.
210
00:07:55,888 --> 00:07:57,389
The zoo sounds nice.
211
00:07:58,140 --> 00:08:00,059
And this one time
we raised a civilization
212
00:08:00,143 --> 00:08:01,227
living on a zit on my face
213
00:08:01,311 --> 00:08:03,230
and Grandpa helped me
rule over it as queen.
214
00:08:03,313 --> 00:08:05,482
It sounds like you guys
are a real family now.
215
00:08:05,858 --> 00:08:07,568
I wish you could've been
part of it, Mom.
216
00:08:09,279 --> 00:08:10,321
Oh, honey.
217
00:08:10,405 --> 00:08:12,783
Rick, is there a deadline
on this theory you're chasing?
218
00:08:12,866 --> 00:08:14,493
Yeah, sure.
219
00:08:14,910 --> 00:08:17,246
That's a good idea, Morty.
Do... that.
220
00:08:19,123 --> 00:08:21,668
I always wished I knew
what they were saying.
221
00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:22,836
Your Master's thesis.
222
00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:24,004
Non-human intelligence.
223
00:08:24,088 --> 00:08:25,548
When did you read that?
224
00:08:25,798 --> 00:08:26,841
After you were gone.
225
00:08:27,133 --> 00:08:28,468
It helped me develop this.
226
00:08:30,178 --> 00:08:32,222
- Fuck you. Fuck you, Greg!
- Fuck you, Lisa!
227
00:08:32,306 --> 00:08:33,599
- Yum, bread.
- No, fuck you!
228
00:08:33,682 --> 00:08:34,725
- Fuck you!
- There's bread.
229
00:08:34,809 --> 00:08:35,935
I guess that's what I expected?
230
00:08:36,018 --> 00:08:37,312
Anti-climactic, isn't it?
231
00:08:37,395 --> 00:08:39,314
Yep, they kinda suck.
232
00:08:42,276 --> 00:08:43,861
Hey, wanna grab a drink?
233
00:08:44,445 --> 00:08:45,863
Hey!
234
00:08:45,947 --> 00:08:47,198
Yeah, alright!
235
00:08:59,087 --> 00:09:01,090
So, wen did you stop
being a lightweight?
236
00:09:01,173 --> 00:09:03,342
Kept looking for my wife
at the bottom of a bottle.
237
00:09:03,634 --> 00:09:04,677
You're pathetic.
238
00:09:05,136 --> 00:09:07,305
Hey. To being pathetic.
239
00:09:12,562 --> 00:09:13,646
Clear!
240
00:09:23,575 --> 00:09:24,951
My turn, my turn.
241
00:09:29,665 --> 00:09:30,875
I'll tell you what, old man.
242
00:09:30,958 --> 00:09:33,837
Seems like losing me made you cooler.
243
00:09:34,504 --> 00:09:35,923
I should die more often.
244
00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:37,883
You did.
245
00:09:38,551 --> 00:09:40,970
You died everywhere forever.
246
00:09:41,763 --> 00:09:43,390
You're the only thing
I can't replace.
247
00:09:43,473 --> 00:09:45,517
Okay, okay, Mr. Weepy.
248
00:09:45,601 --> 00:09:47,645
I'm not even real, remember.
249
00:09:47,728 --> 00:09:50,190
Nothing's real,
that's your jam, right?
250
00:09:50,273 --> 00:09:52,859
My grandson, our grandson
251
00:09:52,943 --> 00:09:55,863
thinks this is happening because
my greatest fear is letting you go.
252
00:09:55,946 --> 00:09:57,657
- Then don't.
- I don't want to.
253
00:09:57,740 --> 00:10:00,285
- Then kiss me.
- I'm old and we have puke mouth.
254
00:10:00,368 --> 00:10:02,412
Well, I'm not here
and it's not real puke.
255
00:10:11,048 --> 00:10:12,800
Okay, Rick. Whoa, dude.
256
00:10:12,883 --> 00:10:14,218
Fuck you, Morty, it's a blazer.
257
00:10:14,301 --> 00:10:16,179
That's not what I meant.
You look sick.
258
00:10:16,262 --> 00:10:17,555
The hole is feeding on you.
259
00:10:17,639 --> 00:10:19,266
I thought it's supposed
to eat my fear.
260
00:10:19,349 --> 00:10:20,809
Can we get some fucking rules
up in this hole?
261
00:10:20,893 --> 00:10:21,935
I don't know the rules!
262
00:10:22,019 --> 00:10:24,313
Maybe you're just dying because
you've been in here too long!
263
00:10:24,397 --> 00:10:25,440
Interesting theory.
264
00:10:25,523 --> 00:10:27,066
I wonder why you're so rosy-cheeked.
265
00:10:27,150 --> 00:10:28,693
- What are you saying?
- Maybe the real you
266
00:10:28,777 --> 00:10:30,279
is off somewhere
running from spiders.
267
00:10:30,362 --> 00:10:31,739
Oh, so now I'm not real?
268
00:10:31,822 --> 00:10:32,907
Yeah, maybe my greatest fear
269
00:10:32,990 --> 00:10:34,659
is having to tell you
to fuck the fuck off!
270
00:10:34,742 --> 00:10:36,411
- Go ahead and face it!
- Fuck the fuck off!
271
00:10:36,494 --> 00:10:38,413
Hey. Ready to Showbiz Pizza?
272
00:10:38,497 --> 00:10:40,457
Lemme see that bear play banjo!
273
00:10:40,541 --> 00:10:43,377
Here's one for ya.
I'm afraid of watching you die.
274
00:10:43,461 --> 00:10:45,797
I like that theory, Morty.
So stop watching.
275
00:10:49,677 --> 00:10:51,846
Okay, this is it. You nailed it.
276
00:10:51,929 --> 00:10:52,972
My worst nightmare.
277
00:10:53,348 --> 00:10:54,808
I'd like to leave The Hole now.
278
00:10:55,851 --> 00:10:58,228
Hey. Hey, Hole, I'm talking to you.
279
00:10:58,312 --> 00:10:59,396
Are you listening?
280
00:11:08,824 --> 00:11:10,618
So, what are you, like, the Hole?
281
00:11:10,701 --> 00:11:12,912
The Hole's promoter?
The Hole's intern?
282
00:11:12,996 --> 00:11:14,039
Is there a hole here?
283
00:11:14,122 --> 00:11:15,999
Right, I'm... I'm supposed
to go in there
284
00:11:16,083 --> 00:11:17,960
and be shocked that there's no hole
285
00:11:18,043 --> 00:11:19,211
or that there is a hole?
286
00:11:19,295 --> 00:11:20,546
What difference would it make?
287
00:11:21,256 --> 00:11:22,674
You are hard to scare.
288
00:11:22,757 --> 00:11:23,925
And Rick isn't, right?
289
00:11:24,009 --> 00:11:26,261
The Hole's gonna,
like, suck on him forever
290
00:11:26,345 --> 00:11:28,973
because his big secret is that
he's got the most fear?
291
00:11:29,056 --> 00:11:31,434
Well, we can certainly say
you're not afraid to be reductive.
292
00:11:31,851 --> 00:11:33,770
I doubt your grandpa has "more" fear
293
00:11:33,854 --> 00:11:35,230
than the average asshole
in a Denny's.
294
00:11:35,314 --> 00:11:36,357
- Hey.
- Sorry.
295
00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:38,276
If anything, he seems pretty brave.
296
00:11:38,359 --> 00:11:39,861
He's certainly not afraid to die.
297
00:11:39,944 --> 00:11:43,031
Maybe that makes
his fear extra... delicious.
298
00:11:45,826 --> 00:11:47,704
So, what, he's scared of love?
299
00:11:47,787 --> 00:11:49,497
Everyone's scared of love, dipshit.
300
00:11:49,581 --> 00:11:50,665
You'll learn that in your twenties.
301
00:11:50,749 --> 00:11:53,377
It takes a very rare,
very powerful being
302
00:11:53,460 --> 00:11:55,713
to be terrified of happiness.
303
00:11:55,796 --> 00:11:56,964
- Dumb.
- You're dumb.
304
00:11:57,048 --> 00:11:58,425
That's why you're not scared
to be happy.
305
00:11:58,508 --> 00:12:00,177
The smarter you are,
the more you know.
306
00:12:00,260 --> 00:12:02,805
Happiness is a trap.
It can't last forever.
307
00:12:02,888 --> 00:12:04,432
Let's say you meet
the love of your life
308
00:12:04,515 --> 00:12:06,225
well, it's still gonna end.
309
00:12:06,309 --> 00:12:09,354
It's inevitable, whether
by the slow pull of a disease
310
00:12:09,438 --> 00:12:11,523
or the shock of loose footing
on a hiking trail.
311
00:12:11,607 --> 00:12:13,985
Whether it'd be the corrosion
of two personalities
312
00:12:14,068 --> 00:12:16,112
that reshape each other
until they're incompatible
313
00:12:16,196 --> 00:12:18,615
or maybe the ol' stranger in a bar
who says the things
314
00:12:18,699 --> 00:12:21,660
that need to be said,
to that person, that night.
315
00:12:21,744 --> 00:12:25,457
The point is, happiness always ends.
316
00:12:25,540 --> 00:12:26,750
Best case scenario, think about this
317
00:12:26,833 --> 00:12:30,921
best case is that you die
at the same time.
318
00:12:31,380 --> 00:12:32,423
Yikes.
319
00:12:32,507 --> 00:12:34,926
Can't the Hole just let me go then?
Sounds like I don't matter.
320
00:12:35,009 --> 00:12:37,179
You don't. But if you go,
you'll take him away.
321
00:12:37,262 --> 00:12:40,099
Don't worry. Rick will die
before accepting happiness.
322
00:12:40,182 --> 00:12:42,351
After that, we'll chase you
with some clowns
323
00:12:42,435 --> 00:12:43,812
or some dumb shit like that.
324
00:12:43,895 --> 00:12:44,938
But Grandpa...
325
00:12:45,522 --> 00:12:47,816
Yummy, yummy,
Grandpa's gonna die.
326
00:12:48,067 --> 00:12:50,570
Just like Diane.
327
00:12:56,994 --> 00:12:59,580
Sir, you've been in this booth
for a really long time.
328
00:12:59,664 --> 00:13:00,915
One coffee isn't gonna cut it.
329
00:13:00,999 --> 00:13:03,001
That's fair. Wanna split
some pancake puppies?
330
00:13:03,084 --> 00:13:04,127
No!
331
00:13:05,921 --> 00:13:07,715
Beth! Summer! Anyone!
332
00:13:07,798 --> 00:13:09,717
Dad, it's not real. Neither are you.
333
00:13:09,801 --> 00:13:11,803
If that's true,
then you deal with it!
334
00:13:12,304 --> 00:13:14,223
You know what, you... you're right.
335
00:13:17,017 --> 00:13:19,395
- How about this?
- Morty! What are you doing?
336
00:13:19,479 --> 00:13:20,605
Being scared!
337
00:13:25,152 --> 00:13:27,154
How is that not enough fear?
338
00:13:27,238 --> 00:13:28,865
You're the one scaring me, Morty!
339
00:13:28,948 --> 00:13:31,326
- No, no, Dad, it's okay.
- It's not okay!
340
00:13:31,410 --> 00:13:32,661
That wasn't normal!
341
00:13:34,496 --> 00:13:37,709
My greatest fear
is not being accepted.
342
00:13:37,792 --> 00:13:39,002
It should be!
343
00:13:39,085 --> 00:13:41,213
And you need to fear it
a hell of a lot more!
344
00:13:42,339 --> 00:13:43,382
I can do that.
345
00:13:43,966 --> 00:13:46,094
You like that? Do you wanna die?
346
00:13:46,177 --> 00:13:49,347
I have enough unaddressed trauma
to flood this hallway.
347
00:13:50,974 --> 00:13:53,644
You fuckin' idiot,
this list says "Top Five Things"
348
00:13:53,728 --> 00:13:55,021
and you only wrote down four!
349
00:14:01,236 --> 00:14:02,279
Trust fall!
350
00:14:03,281 --> 00:14:05,742
None of us touch
or speak to this kid ever.
351
00:14:06,326 --> 00:14:09,288
Maybe... maybe take a picture,
send it to your friends?
352
00:14:09,538 --> 00:14:10,581
Not a bad idea.
353
00:14:11,248 --> 00:14:14,085
How can we do the school play
if Johnny has laryngitis?
354
00:14:14,168 --> 00:14:15,378
There's no understudy!
355
00:14:15,462 --> 00:14:16,546
Put me in the play.
356
00:14:16,630 --> 00:14:17,839
You don't know the lines.
357
00:14:17,923 --> 00:14:20,342
Yes I do. Three Days of Rain?
358
00:14:20,426 --> 00:14:21,552
I... I have it memorized.
359
00:14:21,636 --> 00:14:23,555
And I refuse to prove that
until you cast me.
360
00:14:23,638 --> 00:14:26,266
Have it your way,
but The New York Times is coming
361
00:14:26,349 --> 00:14:27,518
and they're doing a feature
362
00:14:27,601 --> 00:14:29,562
on the current state
of young American theater.
363
00:14:31,564 --> 00:14:32,607
Perfect.
364
00:14:32,690 --> 00:14:34,943
It ended in a church?
365
00:14:35,026 --> 00:14:37,196
- What?
- Yeah, they'd already died.
366
00:14:37,279 --> 00:14:38,697
It was purgatory or something.
367
00:14:38,781 --> 00:14:40,241
How did your universe's version end?
368
00:14:40,533 --> 00:14:42,744
Jack, Locke and Sawyer
teamed up to kill a fog monster
369
00:14:42,827 --> 00:14:43,954
and everyone got rescued.
370
00:14:44,037 --> 00:14:46,623
It was one season long
and it was perfect television.
371
00:14:46,707 --> 00:14:49,001
You can be great
or you can be around forever, right?
372
00:14:49,085 --> 00:14:51,296
True...
373
00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:53,632
True. True.
374
00:14:53,715 --> 00:14:55,092
- Where's this going?
- True...
375
00:14:55,175 --> 00:14:56,468
- We doing robot roleplay?
- True...
376
00:14:56,552 --> 00:14:57,887
- I've got the oil at home.
- True. True.
377
00:14:57,970 --> 00:14:59,722
- What was that? Diane!
- True...
378
00:14:59,806 --> 00:15:01,307
Diane. Diane.
379
00:15:01,391 --> 00:15:02,809
- Hey. Stay with me.
- Diane. Diane.
380
00:15:02,893 --> 00:15:04,937
- Diane.
- Rick? What's happening?
381
00:15:05,020 --> 00:15:07,064
Fuckin' Morty,
he's trying to hog the hole.
382
00:15:07,148 --> 00:15:08,191
C'mon!
383
00:15:14,949 --> 00:15:18,494
Alas, our father is dead.
384
00:15:19,245 --> 00:15:21,415
Walker, are you here?
385
00:15:23,626 --> 00:15:25,461
I... I'm Walker...
386
00:15:27,505 --> 00:15:31,260
Sure has been raining a lot of days.
387
00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:33,971
What the fuck is he doing?
388
00:15:34,639 --> 00:15:35,932
What's wrong with him?
389
00:15:36,015 --> 00:15:37,225
He's naked.
390
00:15:37,308 --> 00:15:39,102
And why does he look sick?
391
00:15:40,395 --> 00:15:41,647
Because he's dying.
392
00:15:42,857 --> 00:15:45,234
Fuck. I gotta get him out of here.
393
00:15:45,318 --> 00:15:47,404
But if I do,
I might have to go with him.
394
00:15:48,113 --> 00:15:49,448
I don't want to.
395
00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:50,824
I... I don't want to, Diane.
396
00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,743
I... I think my greatest fear
is letting you go.
397
00:15:52,827 --> 00:15:55,580
That's a good fear, Rick.
Keep that fear.
398
00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:57,207
If you don't, you'll kill me.
399
00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:58,458
Again.
400
00:15:58,542 --> 00:16:01,337
I know. But I don't have
to kill Morty too.
401
00:16:01,420 --> 00:16:02,922
How do you know he's even real?
402
00:16:03,005 --> 00:16:04,758
Look at his weird little balls.
403
00:16:06,259 --> 00:16:07,427
Goodbye, Diane.
404
00:16:10,932 --> 00:16:12,308
- Rick
- Shut up, Morty.
405
00:16:12,392 --> 00:16:15,187
DJ, drop that beat,
we gotta conquer a fear!
406
00:16:17,689 --> 00:16:18,732
This is my grandson
407
00:16:18,816 --> 00:16:20,067
Don't look at his pee-pee
408
00:16:20,151 --> 00:16:21,277
'Stead of staring at Morty
409
00:16:21,361 --> 00:16:22,695
Put your eyes on me, me
410
00:16:22,779 --> 00:16:23,905
I'm a roped-out freak
411
00:16:23,989 --> 00:16:25,282
Loose dog in my ass
412
00:16:25,365 --> 00:16:26,533
Macaroni in my pocket
413
00:16:26,617 --> 00:16:28,077
Rickity Masterclass
414
00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:29,412
I don't know how to rap
415
00:16:29,495 --> 00:16:30,747
I don't know how to rhyme
416
00:16:30,830 --> 00:16:32,165
I don't know how to rap
417
00:16:32,248 --> 00:16:33,583
Now eat my shit!
418
00:16:34,584 --> 00:16:35,836
Incredible.
419
00:16:35,919 --> 00:16:38,422
Now throw your hands up
And put your hands down
420
00:16:38,547 --> 00:16:41,092
Throw your hands up
Now put them back down
421
00:16:41,926 --> 00:16:44,638
Three days of rain
422
00:16:44,888 --> 00:16:47,016
- Bravo!
- Yeah!
423
00:16:47,099 --> 00:16:49,394
That was an astounding feat
of personal bravery.
424
00:16:49,686 --> 00:16:52,481
Nudity always makes theater
serious and good.
425
00:16:52,898 --> 00:16:53,941
How do you feel?
426
00:16:54,024 --> 00:16:55,568
Accepted. You?
427
00:16:55,651 --> 00:16:57,528
Pathetic. But...
428
00:16:57,945 --> 00:16:58,988
Happy?
429
00:17:12,379 --> 00:17:14,507
We did it! We conquered our fears.
430
00:17:14,882 --> 00:17:15,925
Right?
431
00:17:19,262 --> 00:17:20,305
Hey, Rick.
432
00:17:20,389 --> 00:17:23,893
You just looked real sad,
which I'm afraid of.
433
00:17:23,976 --> 00:17:26,729
You know, of being responsible
for your sadness.
434
00:17:26,813 --> 00:17:29,858
Which means, I think,
we might still be in The Hole.
435
00:17:30,567 --> 00:17:33,905
Well, I am definitely afraid of you
ever knowing anything before me.
436
00:17:33,988 --> 00:17:35,949
So, yeah, I'd say
there's a 100% chance
437
00:17:36,032 --> 00:17:37,075
that we're still...
438
00:17:38,535 --> 00:17:40,871
Goddamn it.
Is this gonna be a whole thing?
439
00:17:40,955 --> 00:17:41,998
No wordplay, Morty.
440
00:17:42,081 --> 00:17:43,416
We have to figure out
our actual fears
441
00:17:43,499 --> 00:17:44,542
if we're ever going
to get out of here.
442
00:17:44,626 --> 00:17:45,669
Actual fears?
443
00:17:45,752 --> 00:17:47,629
Yeah. Tell me your fucking fear
so we can conquer it.
444
00:17:47,713 --> 00:17:49,298
I just had to crucify myself
445
00:17:49,381 --> 00:17:51,342
in order to save you
from your Hole Wife
446
00:17:51,425 --> 00:17:53,970
and you think I'm the one
with unresolved fears?
447
00:17:54,053 --> 00:17:55,722
I oughta be afraid
that we'll never get out
448
00:17:55,806 --> 00:17:57,558
because you'll never admit
that you're afraid!
449
00:18:00,895 --> 00:18:02,146
Okay. Good job.
450
00:18:02,230 --> 00:18:03,273
You conquered it, right?
451
00:18:03,565 --> 00:18:04,608
I think so?
452
00:18:04,691 --> 00:18:05,776
How are we supposed to know?
453
00:18:05,859 --> 00:18:07,611
No, no, this is real, I can tell.
454
00:18:07,695 --> 00:18:09,989
You're not afraid that you could be
certain about something
455
00:18:10,072 --> 00:18:11,616
and still turn out to be wrong?
456
00:18:12,951 --> 00:18:14,119
You cowardly asshole!
457
00:18:14,202 --> 00:18:15,537
How was I supposed to know?
458
00:18:18,332 --> 00:18:20,209
$8 for a side of bacon?
459
00:18:21,085 --> 00:18:22,295
Are you fucking kidding me?
460
00:18:22,379 --> 00:18:25,424
It's a symptom of a larger concern,
Morty, if capitalism collapses...
461
00:18:25,507 --> 00:18:27,009
- Are we done here?
- I don't know.
462
00:18:27,093 --> 00:18:29,262
Aren't you a little afraid
at this point of The Hole itself?
463
00:18:29,345 --> 00:18:30,388
What?
464
00:18:30,805 --> 00:18:32,724
I swear to God
if we're still climbing out
465
00:18:32,808 --> 00:18:34,476
of this fucking Hole
two seasons from now.
466
00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:36,020
- Maybe that was it.
- What?
467
00:18:36,103 --> 00:18:38,856
Maybe we needed to let go
of our fear of uncertainty.
468
00:18:38,940 --> 00:18:40,275
- You know?
- Right.
469
00:18:40,775 --> 00:18:42,986
I... I'd say we're pretty native
to that at this point.
470
00:18:43,070 --> 00:18:45,030
- Okay thank you, Hole.
- Thank you, Hole.
471
00:18:45,114 --> 00:18:46,991
We... we no longer need to
know if we're in you.
472
00:18:47,075 --> 00:18:48,493
So, bye!
473
00:18:56,502 --> 00:18:57,921
Are you afraid we're still in it?
474
00:18:58,004 --> 00:18:59,506
I mean, I hope we're not
475
00:18:59,589 --> 00:19:01,550
- but if we are...
- We'll find out eventually.
476
00:19:01,633 --> 00:19:03,260
- Which no longer scares me.
- Same.
477
00:19:03,886 --> 00:19:05,179
Okay. I'm gonna go get drunk.
478
00:20:18,474 --> 00:20:20,894
Oh, my god,
I've turned into my dad!
479
00:20:22,896 --> 00:20:24,481
Maybe there's no way out.
480
00:20:24,565 --> 00:20:25,858
Maybe we were born here.
481
00:20:26,567 --> 00:20:28,069
C'mon. We're gonna get through this.
482
00:20:28,152 --> 00:20:29,404
I... I'm staying here.
483
00:20:29,487 --> 00:20:30,906
No. We're Rick and Morty.
484
00:20:30,989 --> 00:20:32,199
I'm not leaving without you.
485
00:20:32,908 --> 00:20:34,034
What... what did you say?
486
00:20:34,118 --> 00:20:35,369
I said I'm not leaving you in here.
487
00:20:35,453 --> 00:20:39,207
Come on. You're irreplaceable.
488
00:20:39,291 --> 00:20:41,043
- What?
- Oh, my god.
489
00:20:41,126 --> 00:20:42,836
I... I know what I'm afraid of.
490
00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:45,214
I'm afraid you'd never say that
in real life.
491
00:20:45,298 --> 00:20:47,383
I'm afraid that
if I jumped into a hole
492
00:20:47,467 --> 00:20:49,344
you wouldn't even bother
jumping in after me.
493
00:20:49,428 --> 00:20:51,180
You'd just stand there and watch.
494
00:20:51,263 --> 00:20:53,307
This entire thing has been about me.
495
00:20:53,724 --> 00:20:56,811
You're not even in the hole, are you?
496
00:20:57,938 --> 00:20:59,898
Thank you for visiting
the Fear Hole, Morty.
497
00:20:59,982 --> 00:21:03,361
Your fear of relying on Rick
has been delicious.
498
00:21:03,444 --> 00:21:05,822
Dear God!
499
00:21:07,699 --> 00:21:09,159
Morty!! How was it?
500
00:21:09,243 --> 00:21:10,494
Was it spiders??
501
00:21:11,662 --> 00:21:13,706
Oh, jeez. Oh, my god, no.
502
00:21:13,790 --> 00:21:16,251
You... didn't go in at all?
503
00:21:16,334 --> 00:21:17,669
No, it's a one-person ride.
504
00:21:17,753 --> 00:21:19,672
You can't face two fears
at the same time.
505
00:21:19,755 --> 00:21:21,883
If my fear was fire
and yours was water...
506
00:21:21,966 --> 00:21:23,468
I get it. It's fine.
507
00:21:26,054 --> 00:21:27,181
It really is fine.
508
00:21:27,556 --> 00:21:29,642
You do seem a little less burdened.
509
00:21:29,725 --> 00:21:32,604
Rick, am I irreplaceable?
510
00:21:32,687 --> 00:21:34,773
I mean, define "irreplaceable".
511
00:21:34,856 --> 00:21:36,358
That's good. Good.
512
00:21:37,776 --> 00:21:38,819
I'm back.
513
00:21:39,654 --> 00:21:41,698
Don't!
Or I... I won't know if I'm out!
514
00:21:41,781 --> 00:21:43,950
- Is it that good? Should I go in?
- No.
515
00:21:44,284 --> 00:21:45,327
You holdin' out on me?
516
00:21:45,911 --> 00:21:47,580
You don't want to deal with it, Rick.
517
00:21:47,663 --> 00:21:49,665
There was messed-up
mental shit in there.
518
00:21:49,749 --> 00:21:51,126
Like, Diane was in there.
519
00:21:51,209 --> 00:21:52,419
- What?
- Not in a good way.
520
00:21:52,669 --> 00:21:53,920
Just trust me.
521
00:21:54,254 --> 00:21:56,507
Okay, buddy.
Let's go slam some pancakes.
522
00:22:46,942 --> 00:22:48,110
How about that?
523
00:22:48,193 --> 00:22:49,820
Season 7!
524
00:22:49,903 --> 00:22:52,031
It was touch and go there
for a second.
525
00:22:52,114 --> 00:22:54,617
Remember when I stole my kid?
526
00:22:54,701 --> 00:22:56,870
I stole one of these too.
527
00:23:00,332 --> 00:23:02,668
It's all about having a goal
528
00:23:02,752 --> 00:23:05,297
and stopping at nothing
to achieve it.
529
00:23:05,380 --> 00:23:08,258
Then you'll be fulfilled.
530
00:23:18,712 --> 00:23:27,056
Translator: IYUNO
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