Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,008 --> 00:00:08,142
UH-HUH.
2
00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:09,844
YEAH. UH-HUH.
3
00:00:09,878 --> 00:00:12,013
R-REALLY?
THIS WEEKEND?
4
00:00:12,046 --> 00:00:14,015
WELL, I CAN'T
SAY NO TO YOU.
5
00:00:14,048 --> 00:00:15,584
YOU'RE MARY'S MOTHER.
6
00:00:15,617 --> 00:00:17,518
YEAH, IT SOUNDS
WONDERFUL.
7
00:00:17,552 --> 00:00:20,021
NO, NO. MARY DIDN'T
TELL ME A THING.
8
00:00:20,054 --> 00:00:21,055
DIDN'T TELL WHO
WHAT THING?
9
00:00:21,089 --> 00:00:22,423
YEAH, I'VE NOTICED
THAT ABOUT HER, TOO.
10
00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:23,725
IT'S OFF-PUTTING,
ISN'T IT?
11
00:00:23,758 --> 00:00:25,359
WHO'S THAT?
12
00:00:25,393 --> 00:00:26,761
IT SOUNDS TERRIFIC,
MARTHA.
13
00:00:26,795 --> 00:00:28,462
MARTHA.
MY MOTHER.
14
00:00:28,496 --> 00:00:30,498
YEAH.
OH, GOD, NO!
15
00:00:35,970 --> 00:00:37,305
WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?!
16
00:00:37,338 --> 00:00:39,340
YOU DIDN'T TELL ME THAT
I WAS GONNA MEET YOUR
PARENTS THIS WEEKEND.
17
00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:40,408
YOU'RE NOT!
18
00:00:40,441 --> 00:00:41,910
WELL, THEY SAID THAT
YOU'D MADE THE PLANS.
19
00:00:41,943 --> 00:00:44,813
A--A MONTH AGO,
WHEN WE WERE ENGAGED.
20
00:00:44,846 --> 00:00:48,082
THAT WOULD BE 2 WEEKS
BEFORE YOU RUINED
EVERYTHING.
21
00:00:48,116 --> 00:00:50,652
OH, MARY,
IT'LL BE FUN.
22
00:00:50,685 --> 00:00:52,654
TELLING MY PARENTS
MY ENGAGEMENT IS OFF
23
00:00:52,687 --> 00:00:54,856
IS NOT MY IDEA
OF FUN.
24
00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:55,890
WHAT, YOU HAVEN'T
TOLD THEM YET?
25
00:00:55,924 --> 00:00:57,291
ARE YOU KIDDING?
26
00:00:57,325 --> 00:01:00,061
FOR YEARS THEY
PREDICTED I'D BECOME
AN OLD SPINSTER
27
00:01:00,094 --> 00:01:01,162
WHO SITS ALONE
EVERY NIGHT
28
00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:03,531
DRINKING WINE
AND TALKING
TO HER CAT.
29
00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,066
DOCTOR--
30
00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:07,301
DR. ALBRIGHT,
THEY WERE OUT OF THAT
ZINFANDEL YOU LIKE,
31
00:01:07,335 --> 00:01:09,971
BUT I DID PICK UP
YOUR DOG FOOD.
32
00:01:10,371 --> 00:01:12,106
I HAVE ONE DOG!
33
00:01:12,140 --> 00:01:15,309
MARY, PLEASE!
I WON'T SAY A WORD
ABOUT OUR BREAKUP.
34
00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:18,880
I CAN'T.
I'M STILL IN DENIAL.
35
00:01:18,913 --> 00:01:21,482
DO YOU THINK I WANT
TO SPEND MY WEEKEND
36
00:01:21,515 --> 00:01:23,517
PRETENDING TO BE
ENGAGED TO A LUNATIC
37
00:01:23,551 --> 00:01:26,354
RATHER THAN
TELL MY PARENTS
THE TRUTH?
38
00:01:29,090 --> 00:01:30,625
I'LL PICK YOU UP
IN THE MORNING.
39
00:01:30,659 --> 00:01:32,593
WE'RE JUST PRETENDING!
40
00:01:32,627 --> 00:01:34,929
IF YOU DARE
TO TRY AND TOUCH ME,
41
00:01:34,963 --> 00:01:36,898
I WILL CHOKE
THE LIFE OUT OF YOU.
42
00:01:36,931 --> 00:01:39,901
WELL, WHAT IF I BUMP
INTO YOU ACCIDENTALLY?
43
00:01:39,934 --> 00:01:41,169
FINE.
44
00:01:41,202 --> 00:01:43,204
IN THE SHOWER?
45
00:01:44,773 --> 00:01:48,609
BE IN YOUR DRIVEWAY
AT 8:00 TOMORROW.
46
00:01:48,643 --> 00:01:50,679
TOMORROW?
YOU CAN'T GO AWAY.
47
00:01:50,712 --> 00:01:52,714
YOU PROMISED
YOU'D HELP ME MOVE OUT
OF MY APARTMENT.
48
00:01:52,747 --> 00:01:54,548
OH, I'M
SO SORRY, NINA.
49
00:01:54,582 --> 00:01:55,383
OH, THANKS A LOT.
50
00:01:55,416 --> 00:01:57,151
NOW I SEE WHO'S
IMPORTANT AROUND HERE.
51
00:01:57,185 --> 00:02:00,188
UH, YES,
THAT WOULD BE ME.
52
00:02:00,221 --> 00:02:02,490
OK. FINE.
BUT THE NEXT TIME
53
00:02:02,523 --> 00:02:04,592
YOU CAN'T SEPARATE
THE CHEESE SLICES
IN YOUR LUNCHABLES,
54
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:07,261
DON'T COME
RUNNING TO ME.
55
00:02:08,596 --> 00:02:10,598
WHAT HAVE I DONE?!
56
00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:49,738
TOMMY! HARRY! SALLY!
57
00:02:49,771 --> 00:02:50,972
WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THIS JACKET?
58
00:02:51,005 --> 00:02:54,242
MMM, IT'S A LITTLE
TWEEDY. WHOA!
59
00:02:54,275 --> 00:02:56,644
BUT YOU WIN ME OVER
WITH THE PATCHES.
60
00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:58,346
OH.
61
00:02:58,379 --> 00:02:59,781
I'VE GOT TO MAKE
A GOOD IMPRESSION
62
00:02:59,814 --> 00:03:01,716
WHEN I MEET
MARY'S PARENTS.
63
00:03:01,750 --> 00:03:03,084
MARY ALBRIGHT'S
PARENTS?
64
00:03:03,117 --> 00:03:03,885
Tommy: THEY'RE
STILL ALIVE?
65
00:03:03,918 --> 00:03:05,653
MY GOD,
THEY MUST BE SO OLD.
66
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:07,288
PROBABLY HAD HER
REALLY YOUNG.
67
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:09,457
NOW STOP IT!
THIS IS IMPORTANT.
68
00:03:09,490 --> 00:03:11,159
I HAVE TO WIN THEIR
LOVE AND RESPECT.
69
00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:14,562
WHY? YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE
MARY'S LOVE AND RESPECT.
70
00:03:14,595 --> 00:03:15,563
NOT AT THE MOMENT,
71
00:03:15,596 --> 00:03:18,266
BUT I'M HOPING
THAT IF I WIN
HER PARENTS OVER,
72
00:03:18,299 --> 00:03:19,200
SHE'LL SEE ME
IN A NEW LIGHT
73
00:03:19,233 --> 00:03:21,102
AND FALL IN LOVE
ALL OVER AGAIN.
74
00:03:21,135 --> 00:03:22,904
DICK, THAT'S GENIUS!
75
00:03:22,937 --> 00:03:23,938
I DON'T KNOW.
76
00:03:23,972 --> 00:03:25,673
I'D RATHER HAVE
A RED-HOT POKER
STUCK IN MY EYE
77
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:28,977
THAN HANG OUT
WITH MY GIRLFRIEND'S
MOM AND DAD.
78
00:03:29,010 --> 00:03:31,880
HEY, WHAT IF
HER PARENTS HAVE
A RED-HOT POKER
79
00:03:31,913 --> 00:03:36,417
AND THEY SURPRISE YOU
BY STICKING IT
IN YOUR EYE?
80
00:03:39,153 --> 00:03:39,988
NO.
81
00:03:40,021 --> 00:03:41,790
NO, I'M SURE THEY'RE
LOVELY PEOPLE.
82
00:03:41,823 --> 00:03:43,825
AFTER ALL, THEY
MIXED AND POURED
83
00:03:43,858 --> 00:03:46,394
THE DNA COCKTAIL
THAT IS...
84
00:03:46,427 --> 00:03:49,297
MARY ALBRIGHT.
85
00:03:49,330 --> 00:03:51,699
STILL,
DICK, JUST TO BE SAFE,
WE SHOULD GO WITH YOU.
86
00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:52,733
OH, NO, NO.
87
00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:54,068
I'VE GOT A MUCH MORE
IMPORTANT ASSIGNMENT
FOR YOU.
88
00:03:54,102 --> 00:03:57,005
CLEANING UP
OUR PARKS AND STREAMS?
89
00:03:57,038 --> 00:03:58,272
NO. NINA'S MOVING,
90
00:03:58,306 --> 00:03:59,974
AND I VOLUNTEERED
YOU TO HELP HER.
91
00:04:00,008 --> 00:04:02,811
WHAT, YOU MEAN WE HAVE TO
LUG HEAVY BOXES ALL WEEKEND?
92
00:04:02,844 --> 00:04:03,677
YES.
93
00:04:03,711 --> 00:04:06,614
WELL, DO WE GET TO GO
THROUGH HER STUFF?
94
00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:07,782
HOW COULD YOU NOT?
95
00:04:07,816 --> 00:04:09,650
ALL RIGHT, THEN.
96
00:04:14,055 --> 00:04:16,290
WELL, WHAT
DO YOU THINK?
97
00:04:16,324 --> 00:04:17,959
DOES MARY
LOOK MORE LIKE
ME OR GEORGE?
98
00:04:17,992 --> 00:04:19,560
WELL, MARTHA,
I DID NOTICE
99
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:22,130
THAT YOU AND MARY
HAVE THE SAME
PATRICIAN NOSE.
100
00:04:22,163 --> 00:04:23,898
WHOA.
101
00:04:23,932 --> 00:04:26,334
I THINK SHE DOES
FAVOR MARTHA'S SIDE
OF THE FAMILY
102
00:04:26,367 --> 00:04:27,501
MORE THAN MINE.
103
00:04:27,535 --> 00:04:30,805
BUT AT LEAST
SHE GOT HER FATHER'S
GENEROUS BUTT.
104
00:04:35,643 --> 00:04:38,146
MARY, THAT
EYE SHADOW
105
00:04:38,179 --> 00:04:39,814
MAKES YOU
LOOK TIRED.
106
00:04:39,848 --> 00:04:41,515
THANK YOU, MOTHER.
107
00:04:41,549 --> 00:04:43,918
JUST TRYING
TO HELP.
108
00:04:43,952 --> 00:04:45,119
MARTHA, DARLING,
109
00:04:45,153 --> 00:04:47,621
WHY DON'T YOU
RUN AND GET THE KIDS
THOSE SANDWICHES?
110
00:04:47,655 --> 00:04:50,591
WELL, YES,
OF COURSE, GEORGE.
111
00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:53,895
I'LL RUN AND
GET THE KIDS
THOSE SANDWICHES.
112
00:04:53,928 --> 00:04:58,099
I KEEP FORGETTING
YOU WERE PARALYZED
IN THE WAR.
113
00:05:02,036 --> 00:05:04,138
I REALLY SHOULD
GO AND HELP HER.
114
00:05:04,172 --> 00:05:08,742
I WOULDN'T WANT HER
TO SLIP AND FALL
INTO A BOTTLE OF GIN.
115
00:05:09,777 --> 00:05:11,245
THEY'RE VERY NICE.
116
00:05:11,279 --> 00:05:13,181
NO, THEY'RE NOT.
117
00:05:13,214 --> 00:05:14,682
THEY'RE SOUR,
MISERABLE PEOPLE
118
00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:16,117
WHO DON'T
LIKE ANYBODY.
119
00:05:16,150 --> 00:05:17,218
OH, I SHOULD HAVE
BROUGHT FLOWERS.
120
00:05:17,251 --> 00:05:18,486
DO THEY LIKE FLOWERS?
I CAN GET FLOWERS.
121
00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:20,054
STOP WORRYING.
122
00:05:20,088 --> 00:05:21,890
THIS TIME TOMORROW
WE'LL BE
ON OUR WAY HOME,
123
00:05:21,923 --> 00:05:23,257
AND YOU'LL NEVER
SEE THEM AGAIN.
124
00:05:23,291 --> 00:05:25,293
I WOULDN'T BET ON IT.
125
00:05:25,326 --> 00:05:27,295
WHAT'S THAT
SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
126
00:05:29,597 --> 00:05:30,464
I DON'T KNOW
ABOUT YOU, DICK,
127
00:05:30,498 --> 00:05:32,166
BUT WHEN I EAT HAM,
I GOTTA HAVE A BEER.
128
00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,202
OH, AND
WHEN I DRINK BEER,
I GOTTA HAVE HAM.
129
00:05:34,235 --> 00:05:36,938
HAM AND BEER.
THAT'S US, GEORGE.
130
00:05:45,413 --> 00:05:47,815
AREN'T YOU DONE YET?
131
00:05:47,848 --> 00:05:50,318
YEP, SNUG AS A BUG.
132
00:05:56,124 --> 00:05:59,527
OK, I THINK
I MISSED A SPOT.
133
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:01,462
GUYS, COULD YOU
PLEASE BE CAREFUL?
134
00:06:01,495 --> 00:06:02,897
YES, ABSOLUTELY.
135
00:06:02,931 --> 00:06:04,698
STARTING NOW.
136
00:06:05,599 --> 00:06:07,768
NINA, THIS PLACE
IS SO GREAT.
137
00:06:07,801 --> 00:06:09,971
I MEAN, IT'S
SO NICE AND CLEAN.
138
00:06:10,004 --> 00:06:13,141
WELL, IT'S EASY
TO KEEP THINGS NEAT
WHEN YOU LIVE ALONE.
139
00:06:13,174 --> 00:06:14,642
THE SMELL,
IT SMELLS LIKE...
140
00:06:14,675 --> 00:06:15,143
[INHALES DEEPLY]
141
00:06:15,176 --> 00:06:16,978
LIKE A MALL OR...
142
00:06:17,011 --> 00:06:18,913
OR THE BAKERY OR...
143
00:06:18,947 --> 00:06:22,283
MY HOUSE SMELLS LIKE
FEET OR CHEESE OR
144
00:06:22,316 --> 00:06:22,984
ROTTEN FOOD--
145
00:06:23,017 --> 00:06:26,320
I--I GET IT.
SALLY, I GET IT.
146
00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:31,225
OH, MARTHA, THIS IS
THE MOST DELICIOUS,
147
00:06:31,259 --> 00:06:34,528
EXQUISITELY FLAVORED,
PALATE-TEASING DISH
I'VE EVER TASTED.
148
00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:36,130
WHAT DO YOU
CALL IT AGAIN?
149
00:06:36,164 --> 00:06:38,666
BUSY GAL'S LASAGNA.
150
00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:41,035
I MUST GET THE RECIPE.
151
00:06:41,069 --> 00:06:44,205
IT'S NOODLES
WITH KETCHUP ON 'EM.
152
00:06:45,639 --> 00:06:46,807
GEORGE...
153
00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:48,509
SHUT UP.
154
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:50,878
DON'T GIVE AWAY
HER RECIPES, GEORGE.
155
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:52,280
THANK YOU, DICK.
156
00:06:52,313 --> 00:06:54,915
NOW, MARY,
HOW ABOUT IT? MORE?
157
00:06:54,949 --> 00:06:56,550
UH, NO, MOTHER,
I HAVE ENOUGH.
158
00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:57,851
SHE'S ON ANOTHER ONE
OF THOSE
159
00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,687
CRAZY CRASH DIETS,
RIGHT, DICK?
160
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,722
WELL, I JUST DON'T
THINK SHE LIKES
YOUR LASAGNA
161
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,257
AS MUCH AS I DO,
MARTHA.
162
00:07:03,291 --> 00:07:04,558
YES, I DO,
163
00:07:04,592 --> 00:07:06,194
AND I'M NOT
ON A DIET.
164
00:07:06,227 --> 00:07:08,529
I'M HAPPY
THE WAY I AM.
165
00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:11,065
WELL, THERE COMES A POINT
WHEN YOU JUST HAVE TO ACCEPT
166
00:07:11,099 --> 00:07:13,334
WHAT THE GOOD LORD
HAS GIVEN YOU.
167
00:07:14,702 --> 00:07:17,005
LORD KNOWS I HAVE.
168
00:07:18,973 --> 00:07:20,541
COME ON, DICK,
LET'S SWEETEN UP
YOUR DRINK.
169
00:07:20,574 --> 00:07:22,310
MMM. RIGHT. RIGHT.
170
00:07:22,343 --> 00:07:24,645
GEORGE, I'M
RIGHT BEHIND YOU.
171
00:07:25,813 --> 00:07:27,548
WELL, MARY...
172
00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:31,319
YOUR DADDY AND I
ARE JUST TICKLED PINK
173
00:07:31,352 --> 00:07:33,554
THAT DICK IS THE ONE.
174
00:07:33,587 --> 00:07:34,722
THE ONE WHAT?
175
00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:36,757
OH, MARY MARGARET,
176
00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:40,461
YOU KNOW VERY WELL
THE ONE WHAT.
177
00:07:40,494 --> 00:07:41,095
MR. RIGHT.
178
00:07:41,129 --> 00:07:42,730
OH. YEAH.
179
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,965
THAT'S THE PLAN.
180
00:07:44,999 --> 00:07:47,301
I'M JUST ECSTATIC.
181
00:07:47,335 --> 00:07:49,603
I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE
NOT A LITTLE MORE EXCITED.
182
00:07:49,637 --> 00:07:51,905
OH, I AM, MOTHER.
183
00:07:51,939 --> 00:07:56,144
SOMETIMES I GET SO GIDDY
I CAN HARDLY
CONTAIN MYSELF.
184
00:07:57,145 --> 00:08:01,749
BUT YOU KNOW, YOU CAN
ONLY SCREAM SO LONG
BEFORE YOU BLACK OUT!
185
00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:16,430
I'M NINA.
186
00:08:16,464 --> 00:08:19,733
AND I'M SPECIAL
BECAUSE I'M MOVING.
187
00:08:19,767 --> 00:08:20,368
I'M SALLY.
188
00:08:20,401 --> 00:08:22,870
I THINK I AM SO GREAT.
189
00:08:22,903 --> 00:08:25,539
OH, YOUR HAIR
LOOKS REALLY GOOD
TODAY, GIRLFRIEND.
190
00:08:25,573 --> 00:08:28,509
SHUT UP. NO, IT DOESN'T.
LET'S GO GET SOME MAGAZINES.
191
00:08:35,916 --> 00:08:36,617
WELL...
THAT'S ALL THE UNDERWEAR.
192
00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:38,018
LET'S GET IT
DOWN TO THE TRUCK.
193
00:08:38,052 --> 00:08:39,687
OK.
194
00:08:44,425 --> 00:08:46,494
GOD, I'M GONNA
MISS THIS PLACE.
195
00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:48,429
YEAH.
WHY ARE YOU MOVING,
196
00:08:48,462 --> 00:08:50,098
BIG-ASS RATS?
197
00:08:51,632 --> 00:08:52,900
NO. THEY
RAISED THE RENT.
198
00:08:52,933 --> 00:08:54,202
THAT'S TOO BAD.
199
00:08:54,235 --> 00:08:56,270
IT'S SO BIG AND BRIGHT.
200
00:08:56,304 --> 00:08:57,571
MY ROOM ONLY
HAS ONE WINDOW,
201
00:08:57,605 --> 00:08:59,107
AND IT LOOKS OUT
ON THE SLAUGHTERHOUSE,
202
00:08:59,140 --> 00:09:00,608
AND SOMETIMES
A BROWN MIST FLOATS IN
203
00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:03,311
AND MAKES MY HAIR
ALL GREASY.
204
00:09:04,112 --> 00:09:07,248
IF I'D HAVE KNOWN THAT,
YOU COULD'VE MOVED
ON IN HERE WITH ME.
205
00:09:07,281 --> 00:09:08,682
US?
206
00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:09,783
ROOMMATES?
207
00:09:09,817 --> 00:09:11,452
JUST YOU AND ME,
NO GUYS?
208
00:09:11,485 --> 00:09:13,787
YEAH. BUT IT'S TOO LATE
FOR THAT, I GUESS.
209
00:09:13,821 --> 00:09:15,989
NO!
NO, IT'S NOT.
210
00:09:16,023 --> 00:09:17,525
FINALLY,
THE LAST BOX.
211
00:09:17,558 --> 00:09:18,659
MY BACK
IS KILLING ME.
212
00:09:18,692 --> 00:09:20,428
OH. Y-YOU GOTTA
KEEP IT LOOSE.
213
00:09:20,461 --> 00:09:21,529
HEY, YOU KNOW
WHAT YOU DO?
214
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:24,298
YOU GO DOWN,
GET ALL OF NINA'S STUFF
OFF THE TRUCK,
215
00:09:24,332 --> 00:09:25,433
AND THEN YOU GO
BACK TO OUR PLACE,
216
00:09:25,466 --> 00:09:27,635
GET MY STUFF, AND
BRING IT BACK HERE.
217
00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:28,802
BOY. YOU REALLY
THINK IT'LL WORK?
218
00:09:28,836 --> 00:09:30,504
WELL, I'M WILLING
TO GIVE IT A SHOT.
219
00:09:30,538 --> 00:09:31,939
ACTUALLY,
MY BACK FEELS FINE.
220
00:09:31,972 --> 00:09:34,442
OH, GET MOVING!
COME ON.
221
00:09:35,309 --> 00:09:36,510
I'LL TELL YOU ONE THING,
DICK.
222
00:09:36,544 --> 00:09:40,681
THIS IS ONE BAR
I'LL NEVER GET
THROWN OUT OF.
223
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:42,450
OH, DICK,
I'LL SHOW YOU WHERE
THE LINENS ARE
224
00:09:42,483 --> 00:09:44,518
SO YOU CAN
MAKE UP THE COUCH.
225
00:09:44,552 --> 00:09:45,486
THE COUCH?
226
00:09:45,519 --> 00:09:47,821
NOW PUMPKIN,
227
00:09:47,855 --> 00:09:49,923
IT'S PERFECTLY OK
WITH DADDY AND ME
228
00:09:49,957 --> 00:09:52,092
IF YOU AND DICK
SHARE THE SAME ROOM.
229
00:09:52,126 --> 00:09:53,527
NO! NO, I-IT'S NOT.
230
00:09:53,561 --> 00:09:55,996
I KNOW HOW UNCOMFORTABLE
IT MAKES YOU FEEL.
231
00:09:56,029 --> 00:09:57,265
REALLY?
232
00:09:57,298 --> 00:09:59,900
NEVER STOPPED YOU
BEFORE.
233
00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:01,235
OH, BUT, MOM, I--
234
00:10:01,269 --> 00:10:02,336
DON'T WORRY, PRINCESS.
235
00:10:02,370 --> 00:10:03,971
NO, IT'S FINE WITH US.
236
00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:06,840
ABOUT TIME THIS HOUSE
SAW SOME ACTION.
237
00:10:06,874 --> 00:10:07,708
NO, DAD, REALLY,
I--I--
238
00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:08,676
SAY NO MORE, GEORGE!
239
00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:10,644
IT'S SETTLED.
MARY AND I WILL
SHARE A ROOM.
240
00:10:10,678 --> 00:10:12,112
DONE DEAL.
241
00:10:12,146 --> 00:10:13,981
NOW LET'S GO OUTSIDE
AND SMOKE THESE THINGS.
242
00:10:14,014 --> 00:10:15,849
I'VE GOT SOME
FUNNY STORIES
ABOUT MARY.
243
00:10:15,883 --> 00:10:18,051
OH HO HO HO HO HO!
244
00:10:18,085 --> 00:10:20,254
ME, TOO.
245
00:10:24,091 --> 00:10:26,394
OH, I CANNOT WAIT
TO MOVE OUT ON MY OWN.
246
00:10:26,427 --> 00:10:27,661
IT'S NOTHING PERSONAL.
247
00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:30,464
IT'S JUST THAT YOU GUYS
ARE REALLY, REALLY
ANNOYING, YOU KNOW?
248
00:10:30,498 --> 00:10:32,266
YEAH. ENOUGH SAID.
249
00:10:32,300 --> 00:10:34,835
SALLY, WE'RE ALL
VERY HAPPY FOR YOU,
250
00:10:34,868 --> 00:10:37,104
AND I KNOW THAT
THERE ARE GONNA BE
SOME GOOD TIMES,
251
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:41,409
BUT THERE WILL ALSO BE
SOME LONELY ONES, AND SO...
252
00:10:41,442 --> 00:10:44,378
I WANT YOU
TO HAVE MY GNOME.
253
00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:47,248
NO, HARRY, YOU SEE,
254
00:10:47,281 --> 00:10:50,751
I'M MOVING TO GET
AWAY FROM YOUR CRAP.
255
00:10:50,784 --> 00:10:54,222
OK! I GOT MY GNOME BACK.
256
00:10:54,255 --> 00:10:56,089
YOU KNOW, DICK
WOULD NEVER GIVE YOU
PERMISSION
257
00:10:56,123 --> 00:10:57,191
TO DO THIS.
258
00:10:57,225 --> 00:11:01,295
YEAH. THAT'S WHY
I'M DOING IT
WHILE HE'S OUT OF TOWN.
259
00:11:01,329 --> 00:11:02,896
WELL,
ON THE PLUS SIDE,
260
00:11:02,930 --> 00:11:05,566
AT LEAST WE CAN
TURN SALLY'S ROOM
INTO A STORAGE AREA.
261
00:11:05,599 --> 00:11:08,101
WELL, WAIT A MINUTE.
I DON'T HAVE A ROOM.
262
00:11:08,135 --> 00:11:10,438
OR MAYBE A COOL
LITTLE MUSIC ROOM
263
00:11:10,471 --> 00:11:11,839
WITH SOME
BLACK-LIGHT POSTERS.
264
00:11:11,872 --> 00:11:15,709
HELLO. MAN WITHOUT
A BEDROOM HERE.
265
00:11:15,743 --> 00:11:18,279
YOU KNOW WHAT'D
BE EVEN BETTER?
266
00:11:18,312 --> 00:11:20,013
A SKEEBALL PARLOR.
267
00:11:20,047 --> 00:11:21,549
SKEEBALL?
268
00:11:21,582 --> 00:11:22,850
IN OUR HOME?
269
00:11:22,883 --> 00:11:23,717
YES!
270
00:11:23,751 --> 00:11:26,019
YEAH!
271
00:11:26,053 --> 00:11:29,657
NOW HERE'S LITTLE MARY'S
SIXTH BIRTHDAY PARTY.
272
00:11:29,690 --> 00:11:31,425
OH, YOU
GOT HER A PONY.
273
00:11:31,459 --> 00:11:34,161
NO. THAT'S MARY.
274
00:11:37,130 --> 00:11:40,234
OH, LITTLE MARY'S
CRYING.
275
00:11:40,268 --> 00:11:42,670
SHE DIDN'T
WANT TO SHARE
A SHEET CAKE
276
00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:45,639
WITH THE OTHER KIDS.
277
00:11:45,673 --> 00:11:47,875
OH, HERE'S
THE BIG SPELLING BEE.
278
00:11:47,908 --> 00:11:49,477
MARY'S WORD
IS "BECAUSE."
279
00:11:49,510 --> 00:11:50,944
WATCH HER SWEAT.
280
00:11:50,978 --> 00:11:52,246
[MARTHA LAUGHS]
281
00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:53,281
George: "B"
282
00:11:53,314 --> 00:11:54,315
"E"
283
00:11:54,348 --> 00:11:55,416
"C"
284
00:11:55,449 --> 00:11:56,584
"A"
285
00:11:56,617 --> 00:11:58,652
"W"!
286
00:12:02,623 --> 00:12:04,925
AH! MAGPIE.
287
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:08,228
WHY'D YOU MISS
SUCH AN EASY WORD?
288
00:12:08,262 --> 00:12:10,364
BECAUSE.
289
00:12:10,398 --> 00:12:13,066
SHE CAN SAY IT.
SHE JUST CAN'T
SPELL IT.
290
00:12:14,668 --> 00:12:17,571
YOU'RE A HOOT
AND A HALF, SON.
291
00:12:17,605 --> 00:12:19,840
THANK YOU, DADDY.
292
00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:23,877
DICK, CAN I SEE YOU
IN THE BEDROOM?
293
00:12:23,911 --> 00:12:26,714
OH, COMING, MAGPIE.
294
00:12:26,747 --> 00:12:29,082
OH, YEAH.
295
00:12:31,919 --> 00:12:34,388
WONDERFUL.
HE CALLED ME SON.
296
00:12:34,422 --> 00:12:35,523
MY PLAN IS WORKING.
297
00:12:35,556 --> 00:12:38,191
YOUR PLAN
TO PISS ME OFF?
298
00:12:38,225 --> 00:12:41,128
NO. MY PLAN
TO WIN THEIR HEARTS
AND THEN YOURS.
299
00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:43,964
OH, SO BY JOINING
IN MY PARENTS'
PSYCHO MIND GAMES
300
00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:45,966
AND MOCKING
MY FAT CHILDHOOD,
301
00:12:45,999 --> 00:12:47,801
YOU THOUGHT
I'D LOVE YOU AGAIN?
302
00:12:47,835 --> 00:12:50,203
PSYCHO MIND GAMES?
I--WH--
303
00:12:50,237 --> 00:12:53,073
LET ME TELL YOU
ABOUT MY WONDERFUL
PARENTS.
304
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,075
IN 1961, MY FATHER
305
00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:56,777
HAD AN AFFAIR
WITH A STEWARDESS.
306
00:12:56,810 --> 00:12:57,778
WELL...
307
00:12:57,811 --> 00:13:00,080
YOU MEAN
A FLIGHT ATTENDANT.
308
00:13:01,349 --> 00:13:02,583
NO.
309
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:05,285
A STEWARDESS.
310
00:13:05,319 --> 00:13:07,955
THAT DESPICABLE DOG!
311
00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:09,423
MY MOTHER
FOUND THEM TOGETHER,
312
00:13:09,457 --> 00:13:10,824
AND SHE WAS
SO WONDERFUL,
313
00:13:10,858 --> 00:13:13,327
SHE DUMPED IT
ALL ON ME.
314
00:13:13,361 --> 00:13:14,962
ME, DICK,
315
00:13:14,995 --> 00:13:15,929
A LITTLE GIRL.
316
00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:18,999
OH, MARY,
WHAT AN AWFUL PICTURE--
317
00:13:19,032 --> 00:13:21,669
A BITTER OLD DRUNK
DESCRIBING SOME
TAWDRY AFFAIR
318
00:13:21,702 --> 00:13:23,871
WHILE SPOON-FEEDING YOU
STRAINED BANANAS
319
00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:27,007
AS YOU SIT IN YOUR
LITTLE HIGHCHAIR.
320
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:28,576
WELL, I WAS 9.
321
00:13:28,609 --> 00:13:32,346
AND YOU WERE STILL
EATING BABY FOOD?
MY POOR MARY.
322
00:13:32,380 --> 00:13:33,681
OH, DICK, THE WHOLE--
323
00:13:33,714 --> 00:13:35,483
THE WHOLE THING
TORE ME APART.
324
00:13:35,516 --> 00:13:36,784
I FELT IT
WAS MY FAULT.
325
00:13:36,817 --> 00:13:38,051
IT WAS THEIR FAULT, MARY!
326
00:13:38,085 --> 00:13:38,986
I FELT SO ALONE.
327
00:13:39,019 --> 00:13:42,556
YOU'RE NOT ALONE, MARY,
NOT ANYMORE!
328
00:13:42,590 --> 00:13:46,894
AND TO THINK
I HAD MY HAND
IN THAT MAN'S HUMIDOR!
329
00:13:53,801 --> 00:13:55,703
OHH!
330
00:13:55,736 --> 00:13:57,104
HARRY, YOU GOTTA
HELP ME WITH THIS ONE.
331
00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:59,139
IT'S FULL OF BOOKS
AND ROCKS AND STUFF.
332
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,808
IT WEIGHS A TON.
333
00:14:00,841 --> 00:14:03,176
STEP ASIDE, JUNIOR.
334
00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:07,515
TIME TO CLEAN AND JERK.
335
00:14:07,548 --> 00:14:10,484
1, 2, 3.
336
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,427
IT WAS EMPTY.
337
00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:22,463
NO.
338
00:14:22,496 --> 00:14:25,666
I'M THE STRONGEST MAN
IN THE WORLD.
339
00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:29,503
THIS IS GOING TO BE
SO MUCH FUN.
340
00:14:29,537 --> 00:14:30,804
I KNOW.
341
00:14:30,838 --> 00:14:31,972
SO WHAT DO YOU WANT
TO DO TONIGHT?
342
00:14:32,005 --> 00:14:32,973
UH, I DON'T KNOW.
343
00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:35,108
UM, MAKE STIR-FRY AND
RENT A CHICK FLICK?
344
00:14:35,142 --> 00:14:38,746
YEAH, LIKE
FULL METAL JACKET.
345
00:14:38,779 --> 00:14:40,914
OR BOYS ON THE SIDE.
346
00:14:40,948 --> 00:14:43,116
RIGHT, RIGHT.
BOYS ON THE SIDE.
347
00:14:43,150 --> 00:14:45,553
OR FULL METAL JACKET!
348
00:14:53,461 --> 00:14:56,396
I'LL GIVE YOU THE SECRET
TO A GREAT BLOODY MARY,
DICK.
349
00:14:56,430 --> 00:14:57,798
HORSERADISH.
350
00:14:57,831 --> 00:15:00,868
IT'S NOT THE HORSERADISH,
GEORGIE.
351
00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:04,472
IT'S THE VODKA.
352
00:15:04,505 --> 00:15:05,539
YOU KNOW,
GETTING THIS HOT TUB
353
00:15:05,573 --> 00:15:07,608
WAS THE SMARTEST THING
I'VE EVER DONE.
354
00:15:07,641 --> 00:15:08,609
OH, REALLY?
355
00:15:08,642 --> 00:15:09,943
AND WHAT WOULD
THE STUPIDEST,
356
00:15:09,977 --> 00:15:13,947
MOST LOATHSOME,
AND HURTFUL THING BE?
357
00:15:13,981 --> 00:15:17,150
NOT GETTING
THE FLOATING
THERMOMETER.
358
00:15:17,184 --> 00:15:18,251
CAN I GET YOU
ANYTHING, DICK?
359
00:15:18,285 --> 00:15:20,488
A DRINK?
MAYBE SOME COFFEE?
360
00:15:20,521 --> 00:15:23,056
TEA. OR MAYBE ME.
361
00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:25,526
IS THAT WHAT
THE LITTLE FLYING STRUMPET
SAID TO ENTICE YOU?
362
00:15:25,559 --> 00:15:27,861
IS ONE SLEAZY PICKUP LINE
ALL IT TAKES
363
00:15:27,895 --> 00:15:30,464
TO DESTROY A FAMILY?!
364
00:15:30,498 --> 00:15:31,632
MARY!
365
00:15:31,665 --> 00:15:33,967
FOR GOD'S SAKES.
366
00:15:34,001 --> 00:15:35,969
YOU TOLD HIM?
367
00:15:36,003 --> 00:15:37,437
I COULDN'T STAND IT
ANYMORE.
368
00:15:37,471 --> 00:15:38,506
MARTHA.
369
00:15:38,539 --> 00:15:41,174
YOU TOLD OUR DAUGHTER
ABOUT MY--MY--MY--
370
00:15:41,208 --> 00:15:42,643
THAT'S RIGHT!
371
00:15:42,676 --> 00:15:44,578
YOUR LITTLE FLING.
372
00:15:44,612 --> 00:15:47,447
YOU-HOO-HOO BET
I TOLD HER.
373
00:15:47,481 --> 00:15:50,117
SO SHE COULD PLAY
THE MARTYR FOR 36 YEARS.
374
00:15:50,150 --> 00:15:51,985
HOW DO YOU THINK
I FELT?
375
00:15:52,019 --> 00:15:53,654
ALONE AND SCARED,
376
00:15:53,687 --> 00:15:56,056
A SHEET CAKE
HER ONLY SOLACE.
377
00:15:56,089 --> 00:15:57,725
SHE DROVE ME TO IT,
PRINCESS.
378
00:15:57,758 --> 00:15:59,627
ALL RIGHT!
MAYBE I DID.
379
00:15:59,660 --> 00:16:02,496
BUT I WAS TOO FAT,
380
00:16:02,530 --> 00:16:04,698
AND I HATED MY BODY,
381
00:16:04,732 --> 00:16:08,869
AND THOSE DAMN DIET PILLS
MADE ME CRAZY.
382
00:16:08,902 --> 00:16:09,903
YOU TOOK DIET PILLS?
383
00:16:09,937 --> 00:16:12,740
OUR FAMILY DOCTOR
PRESCRIBED THEM.
384
00:16:12,773 --> 00:16:15,876
FOR GOD'S SAKES,
IT WAS THE SIXTIES!
385
00:16:15,909 --> 00:16:19,613
SHE WENT TO DR. POWELL
FOR MORE THAN JUST PILLS.
386
00:16:19,647 --> 00:16:20,581
[GASP]
387
00:16:20,614 --> 00:16:24,785
DR. POWELL?!
HE HAD HAIR IN HIS EARS.
388
00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:27,721
SHE WENT
TO DR. POWELL,
WHO WAS HER COUSIN.
389
00:16:27,755 --> 00:16:29,557
HE WAS MY STEP-COUSIN!
390
00:16:29,590 --> 00:16:30,791
HE WAS MY
GOLF PARTNER!
391
00:16:30,824 --> 00:16:32,225
HE WAS A MAN!
392
00:16:32,259 --> 00:16:34,361
ENOUGH!
393
00:16:34,394 --> 00:16:35,663
YOU TWO LIE TO EACH OTHER
394
00:16:35,696 --> 00:16:36,830
AND CHEAT ON EACH OTHER
395
00:16:36,864 --> 00:16:38,999
AND I'M STUCK IN THE MIDDLE.
396
00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:41,201
YOU'VE MADE MY LIFE
MISERABLE.
397
00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:44,304
WHY THE HELL
DID THE TWO OF YOU
STAY MARRIED?
398
00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:48,576
[THROUGH CLENCHED TEETH]
TO TRY TO GIVE YOU
A HAPPY HOME.
399
00:16:48,609 --> 00:16:50,243
OH, MY GOD!
400
00:16:50,277 --> 00:16:51,945
LOOK AT THE TWO OF YOU!
401
00:16:51,979 --> 00:16:54,247
HAVE YOU NO SHAME?
402
00:17:05,492 --> 00:17:07,761
UM, SALLY,
I KNOW YOU JUST GOT HERE,
403
00:17:07,795 --> 00:17:08,629
BUT YOU LEFT YOUR SOCKS--
404
00:17:08,662 --> 00:17:10,097
SHH. HONEY...
405
00:17:10,130 --> 00:17:12,132
IT'S SHARK WEEK.
406
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:14,635
DO YOU WANT ME
TO HELP YOU
MOVE THAT FUTON
407
00:17:14,668 --> 00:17:15,903
INTO YOUR ROOM?
408
00:17:15,936 --> 00:17:16,670
MY ROOM?
409
00:17:16,704 --> 00:17:18,005
YEAH. THE ROOM
DOWN THE HALL.
410
00:17:18,038 --> 00:17:21,174
OH, NO.
I LIKE THIS ONE.
411
00:17:21,208 --> 00:17:23,176
THIS IS THE LIVING ROOM.
412
00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:25,679
YEAH, AND I'M GONNA
LIVE IN IT.
413
00:17:25,713 --> 00:17:28,181
YOU GOT TO PICK
YOUR ROOM, I GET
TO PICK MINE.
414
00:17:28,215 --> 00:17:29,249
NO WAY.
415
00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:31,351
LOOK, I DIDN'T COMPLAIN
WHEN YOU FINISHED
MY MILK.
416
00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:34,622
YOUR MILK?
YOU JUST WROTE "SALLY"
ON MILK.
417
00:17:34,655 --> 00:17:36,556
SO THAT'S HOW
IT'S GONNA BE, HUH?
418
00:17:36,590 --> 00:17:38,291
WELL, AS LONG AS
WE'RE BEING HONEST
WITH EACH OTHER,
419
00:17:38,325 --> 00:17:41,561
I DON'T LIKE
HOW YOU LEAVE
THE TOILET SEAT DOWN.
420
00:17:41,595 --> 00:17:43,964
THAT'S THE WAY
WOMEN USE IT.
421
00:17:43,997 --> 00:17:46,767
YEAH, SURE.
422
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:49,169
THAT'S THE WAY
WOMEN USE IT.
423
00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:50,370
LOOK, YOU KNOW,
BEING YOUR ROOMMATE
424
00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:52,172
IS NOT AS MUCH FUN
AS IT USED TO BE.
425
00:17:52,205 --> 00:17:54,207
YOU'VE ONLY BEEN HERE
AN HOUR AND A HALF.
426
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:56,877
YEAH, AND IT'S
AN HOUR AND A HALF
TOO LONG.
427
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:58,378
ALL RIGHT, THIS IS IT.
428
00:17:58,411 --> 00:17:59,980
THE LAST BOX OF SHOES.
429
00:18:00,013 --> 00:18:01,581
WELL...
LOAD IT UP, BOYS,
430
00:18:01,615 --> 00:18:04,184
'CAUSE I'M MOVIN' OUT!
431
00:18:04,217 --> 00:18:05,753
NO.
432
00:18:05,786 --> 00:18:08,321
ABSOLUTELY NOT!
433
00:18:10,791 --> 00:18:12,626
SALLY, FOR THE FIRST TIME
IN MY LIFE--
434
00:18:12,660 --> 00:18:13,593
DO IT OR I'LL KILL YOU.
435
00:18:13,627 --> 00:18:15,462
OK.
436
00:18:21,669 --> 00:18:22,836
YOU KNOW...
437
00:18:22,870 --> 00:18:24,772
THIS WEEKEND
438
00:18:24,805 --> 00:18:27,540
HAS BEEN MORE CATHARTIC
FOR ME
439
00:18:27,574 --> 00:18:31,044
THAN THE ENTIRE TIME
I SPENT IN REHAB.
440
00:18:33,847 --> 00:18:35,849
REHAB?
441
00:18:37,217 --> 00:18:39,386
1982.
442
00:18:39,419 --> 00:18:40,553
I KNOW.
443
00:18:40,587 --> 00:18:43,590
I SAID I WAS VISITING
YOUR AUNT DEE DEE.
444
00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,625
OK, MARY,
EVERYTHING'S PACKED.
445
00:18:45,659 --> 00:18:46,927
CHOP-CHOP, GOTTA GO.
446
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,729
DICK...
447
00:18:50,664 --> 00:18:51,899
I THINK WE SHOULD STAY.
448
00:18:51,932 --> 00:18:52,866
WHAT?
449
00:18:52,900 --> 00:18:54,334
MY PARENTS AND I
HAVE BEEN TALKING
450
00:18:54,367 --> 00:18:56,136
SINCE THE LITTLE BLOW-UP
IN THE HOT TUB,
451
00:18:56,169 --> 00:18:57,470
AND I THINK WE'VE MADE
SOME PROGRESS.
452
00:18:57,504 --> 00:18:59,172
PROGRESS?
ARE THEY GETTING
A DIVORCE?
453
00:18:59,206 --> 00:19:00,774
DIVORCE?
454
00:19:00,808 --> 00:19:03,744
THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED
FOR 46 YEARS.
455
00:19:03,777 --> 00:19:06,714
YES, BUT 46
HORRIBLE YEARS.
456
00:19:06,747 --> 00:19:08,548
I'M SURE THEY'VE HAD
THEIR UPS AND DOWNS,
457
00:19:08,581 --> 00:19:11,451
BUT IT'S ONLY MADE THEM
STRONGER.
THAT'S WHAT MARRIAGE IS.
458
00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:13,721
OH, MY GOD,
THEY'VE BRAINWASHED YOU.
459
00:19:13,754 --> 00:19:15,155
NOW YOU'RE ONE OF THEM.
460
00:19:15,188 --> 00:19:16,623
DICK, I WANT TO THANK YOU
461
00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:18,892
FOR BRINGING EVERYTHING
OUT IN THE OPEN.
462
00:19:18,926 --> 00:19:22,129
I FEEL LIKE
A TREMENDOUS WEIGHT'S BEEN
LIFTED FROM THIS FAMILY.
463
00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:23,396
I WANT TO TELL YOU TWO
SOMETHING.
464
00:19:23,430 --> 00:19:25,966
THERE'S NOTHING
MORE EXHILARATING
THAN HONESTY.
465
00:19:25,999 --> 00:19:27,100
OH!
466
00:19:27,134 --> 00:19:29,469
OH! SO HONESTY'S
YOUR GAME, IS IT?
467
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:31,504
YEAH, I'LL GIVE YOU HONESTY.
468
00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:32,639
YOUR PRECIOUS LITTLE
469
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:35,542
MARY MARGARET
RAGAMUFFIN MAGPIE
HAS BEEN LYING TO YOU!
470
00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:36,476
SHE DIDN'T EVEN
WANT TO COME HERE
471
00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:39,980
BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T
WANT TO TELL YOU THAT--
472
00:19:40,013 --> 00:19:42,382
OUR ENGAGEMENT IS OFF!
WE'RE THROUGH!
473
00:19:42,415 --> 00:19:44,151
BUT THAT'S OK,
BECAUSE I DON'T WANT
TO MARRY HER ANYWAY.
474
00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:46,519
I DON'T WANT
TO MARRY ANYONE--
NOT AFTER MEETING YOU.
475
00:19:46,553 --> 00:19:49,757
IF THIS MARRIAGE
WAS A HORSE,
YOU'D SHOOT IT!
476
00:19:54,594 --> 00:19:56,129
DICK, WE FORGIVE YOU.
477
00:19:56,163 --> 00:19:57,164
FORGIVE ME?
478
00:19:57,197 --> 00:19:58,598
WOULD YOU LIKE
SOME COCOA?
479
00:19:58,631 --> 00:20:01,101
I DON'T WANT ANY COCOA.
I DON'T WANT ANYTHING.
480
00:20:01,134 --> 00:20:02,970
I JUST WANT TO
CLIMB INTO A SPACESHIP
481
00:20:03,003 --> 00:20:05,205
AND FLY TO
A FAR-OFF GALAXY,
482
00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:09,509
MILLIONS OF LIGHT-YEARS AWAY
FROM THIS TWISTED
AND SADISTIC
483
00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:11,945
HUMAN FREAK SHOW!
484
00:20:13,747 --> 00:20:16,817
HE'S THE ONE.
HE'S THE ONE.
485
00:20:21,088 --> 00:20:22,890
SO HOW DID
THE MOVE GO?
486
00:20:22,923 --> 00:20:25,158
WELL, THE FIRST ONE
WENT PRETTY SMOOTH,
487
00:20:25,192 --> 00:20:27,861
BUT THE SECOND ONE
WAS A BITCH.
488
00:20:27,895 --> 00:20:30,597
WE HAD A GOOD RHYTHM
GOING FOR THE THIRD MOVE,
489
00:20:30,630 --> 00:20:34,434
BUT THE FOURTH
AND FIFTH MOVES
WERE JUST HELL.
490
00:20:34,467 --> 00:20:35,903
WUSSIES.
491
00:20:35,936 --> 00:20:37,938
YOU KNOW, I REALLY
DODGED A BULLET
TODAY, DICK.
492
00:20:37,971 --> 00:20:40,473
TO THINK
I WAS THIS CLOSE
TO MOVING IN WITH NINA.
493
00:20:40,507 --> 00:20:44,744
HAH. SHE'S NOT NEARLY
SOPHISTICATED ENOUGH
FOR ME.
494
00:20:44,778 --> 00:20:46,313
I DODGED A BULLET, TOO.
495
00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:49,817
I THOUGHT MARRIAGE
WAS A BEAUTIFUL UNION
OF TWO SOULS.
496
00:20:49,850 --> 00:20:53,653
IT TURNS OUT
IT'S A HOT, BUBBLING
CHLORINATED SEA OF LIES,
497
00:20:53,686 --> 00:20:57,724
BETRAYALS, AND ADDICTIONS,
AND I DON'T WANT
TO GO THERE.
498
00:20:57,757 --> 00:21:00,193
WELL, I'LL GO.
THAT SOUNDS RELAXING.
499
00:21:00,227 --> 00:21:03,230
NO. FROM NOW ON,
WE'RE FOOTLOOSE
AND FANCY-FREE.
500
00:21:03,263 --> 00:21:04,231
FROM THIS DAY FORWARD,
501
00:21:04,264 --> 00:21:07,334
PEOPLE WILL REFER TO ME
AS A LIFELONG BACHELOR.
502
00:21:07,367 --> 00:21:09,202
YOU'RE NOT GONNA
START WEARING
PASTEL CARDIGANS
503
00:21:09,236 --> 00:21:12,639
AND OPEN UP
AN ANTIQUE STORE,
ARE YOU?
504
00:21:12,672 --> 00:21:16,209
WHATEVER GETS ME THE LADIES.
505
00:21:16,243 --> 00:21:19,646
YEAH, DICK,
YOU'LL DO GREAT.
506
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:29,857
GEORGE, THERE'S SOMETHING
I HAVE TO TELL YOU.
507
00:21:29,890 --> 00:21:32,592
I'M LISTENING.
508
00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:34,962
YOU'RE NOT MARY'S FATHER.
509
00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:42,970
I'VE SUSPECTED THAT
FOR A LONG TIME,
MARTHA.
510
00:21:43,003 --> 00:21:44,304
DOES SHE KNOW?
511
00:21:44,337 --> 00:21:45,505
OH, DON'T BE SILLY.
512
00:21:45,538 --> 00:21:47,407
OF COURSE NOT.
513
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:48,808
GOOD.
514
00:21:50,210 --> 00:21:50,277
NEXT TIME THEY VISIT.
35423
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.