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1
00:00:03,770 --> 00:00:06,072
But sometimes
I have prophetic dreams.
2
00:00:06,139 --> 00:00:09,109
Like the one where I was
at a garden party.
3
00:00:10,410 --> 00:00:11,911
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
4
00:00:12,979 --> 00:00:14,581
[MICROPHONE FEEDBACK]
5
00:00:16,549 --> 00:00:18,551
Excuse me.
6
00:00:18,618 --> 00:00:21,287
Everyone, I have
a brief announcement to make.
7
00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:24,391
Jesus was black,
Ronald Reagan was the devil,
8
00:00:24,457 --> 00:00:27,160
and the government
is lyin' about 9/11.
9
00:00:27,227 --> 00:00:30,263
Thank you for your time
and good night.
10
00:00:30,997 --> 00:00:33,266
No!
11
00:00:33,333 --> 00:00:35,602
That can't be true!
12
00:00:35,668 --> 00:00:36,836
[CROWD SCREAMS & SHOUTS]
13
00:00:36,903 --> 00:00:38,371
[MAN GROWLING]
14
00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:39,406
[GRUNTS]
15
00:00:39,472 --> 00:00:41,474
[♪♪♪]
16
00:00:42,375 --> 00:00:43,376
Unhand me!
17
00:00:43,977 --> 00:00:45,078
Hi-ya!
18
00:00:47,647 --> 00:00:48,715
MAN:
He's on fire!
19
00:00:48,782 --> 00:00:49,816
Somebody get some water.
20
00:00:51,151 --> 00:00:52,352
Ow!
21
00:00:52,419 --> 00:00:54,220
Mm-hm. You havin' that dream
where you made
22
00:00:54,287 --> 00:00:55,789
the white people riot,
weren't ya?
23
00:00:55,855 --> 00:00:57,323
But I was tellin' the truth!
24
00:00:57,390 --> 00:01:00,160
How many times have I told you,
you better not even dream
25
00:01:00,226 --> 00:01:01,694
about tellin' white folk
the truth?
26
00:01:01,761 --> 00:01:02,762
You understand me?
27
00:01:02,829 --> 00:01:03,997
Shoot.
28
00:01:04,063 --> 00:01:06,199
Makin' white people riot.
29
00:01:06,266 --> 00:01:08,668
You better learn
how to lie like me.
30
00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:11,638
I'm gonna find me a white man
and lie to him right now.
31
00:01:13,606 --> 00:01:15,475
♪ I am the stone
The builder refused ♪
32
00:01:15,542 --> 00:01:17,377
♪ I am the visual
The inspiration ♪
33
00:01:17,444 --> 00:01:18,878
♪ That made lady
Sing the blues ♪
34
00:01:18,945 --> 00:01:20,747
♪ I'm the spark
That makes your idea bright ♪
35
00:01:20,814 --> 00:01:22,348
♪ The same spark
That lights the dark ♪
36
00:01:22,414 --> 00:01:24,350
♪ So that you can know
Your left from your right ♪
37
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:26,619
♪ I am the ballot in your box
The bullet in the gun ♪
38
00:01:26,686 --> 00:01:28,121
♪ The inner glow
That lets you know ♪
39
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:29,456
♪ To call your brother sun ♪
40
00:01:29,521 --> 00:01:30,757
♪ The story that just begun ♪
41
00:01:30,824 --> 00:01:32,125
♪ The promise
Of what's to come ♪
42
00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:33,359
♪ And I'm a remain a soldier ♪
43
00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:35,395
♪ Till the war is won ♪
44
00:01:35,462 --> 00:01:37,896
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
45
00:01:37,964 --> 00:01:40,567
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
46
00:01:40,633 --> 00:01:43,169
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
47
00:01:43,235 --> 00:01:45,939
♪ Chop, chop, chop ♪
48
00:01:46,005 --> 00:01:48,074
[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING ON TV]
♪ Work it out, yeah ♪
49
00:01:48,140 --> 00:01:50,543
[GRUNTING]
50
00:01:50,610 --> 00:01:53,146
♪ Everybody work that body
Move your body ♪
51
00:01:53,213 --> 00:01:55,181
♪ To the beat ♪
52
00:01:55,247 --> 00:01:57,851
♪ Everybody move that body ♪
53
00:01:57,917 --> 00:01:59,384
♪ Oh, yeeeaaah ♪
54
00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:00,720
♪ Yeah ♪
55
00:02:02,255 --> 00:02:04,891
Sorry, Billy Blanks,
but why buy the tape
56
00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:07,093
when you can get
the infomercial for free?
57
00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:08,193
Whew!
58
00:02:14,501 --> 00:02:16,302
[♪♪♪]
59
00:02:16,369 --> 00:02:18,905
What the hell?
60
00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:21,107
Boys!
61
00:02:21,174 --> 00:02:23,243
[VOICE ECHOING]
62
00:02:23,309 --> 00:02:24,511
[CROWS CAWING]
63
00:02:24,577 --> 00:02:26,713
Would one of y'all like
to explain this?
64
00:02:26,779 --> 00:02:27,914
Uh...
65
00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:31,084
You mean, the orange juice
or the miniskirt?
66
00:02:31,150 --> 00:02:33,520
Which one of y'all drank
the last glass of orange juice?
67
00:02:33,586 --> 00:02:35,922
That's the last full day's
supply of vitamin C.
68
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,057
What am I supposed to do
about my vitamin C now?
69
00:02:38,124 --> 00:02:40,960
Y'all need to start
appreciatin' your granddaddy.
70
00:02:41,027 --> 00:02:42,529
I went and spent
your inheritance
71
00:02:42,595 --> 00:02:44,930
on this beautiful house
in this neighborhood.
72
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,466
And all I ask you to do
73
00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:47,800
is act like you got some class.
74
00:02:47,867 --> 00:02:49,569
[WHISPERING]
Hey, what's class?
75
00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:51,371
It means don't act
like niggas.
76
00:02:51,437 --> 00:02:53,940
S-see? That's what
I'm talkin' about right there.
77
00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:55,909
We don't use the N-word
in this house.
78
00:02:55,975 --> 00:02:58,578
Granddad, you said the word
"nigga" 46 times yesterday.
79
00:02:58,645 --> 00:02:59,612
I counted.
80
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:00,680
Nigga, hush.
81
00:03:00,747 --> 00:03:01,881
Now, you may not like it,
82
00:03:01,948 --> 00:03:04,117
but I moved y'all out here
83
00:03:04,183 --> 00:03:05,718
to expand your horizon.
84
00:03:05,785 --> 00:03:08,021
There's a new white man
out here.
85
00:03:08,087 --> 00:03:09,055
He's refined.
86
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:10,890
For example, did you know
87
00:03:10,957 --> 00:03:12,959
that the new white man
loves gourmet cheese?
88
00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:13,960
Wait.
89
00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:16,728
I'm sorry,
did you say cheese?
90
00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:18,097
Yep, cheese.
91
00:03:18,164 --> 00:03:20,400
You give the meanest white man
a piece of cheese,
92
00:03:20,466 --> 00:03:22,001
and he turn into Mr. Rogers.
93
00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:23,670
Granddad,
that doesn't make sense.
94
00:03:23,736 --> 00:03:24,904
Don't you talk back to me.
95
00:03:24,971 --> 00:03:26,306
Granddad, you can't tame
96
00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:28,575
the white supremacist
power structure with cheese!
97
00:03:28,641 --> 00:03:30,243
Oh, yes, I can!
No, you can't!
98
00:03:30,310 --> 00:03:31,911
GRANDDAD: Yes, I can!
No, you can not!
99
00:03:31,978 --> 00:03:32,912
HUEY:
Cheese.
100
00:03:32,978 --> 00:03:33,980
How can somebody that old
101
00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:36,382
say somethin' that stupid?
102
00:03:36,449 --> 00:03:38,184
RILEY:
I know about white people too.
103
00:03:38,251 --> 00:03:39,586
Like, when they talk,
104
00:03:39,652 --> 00:03:45,425
[OVER-ENUNCIATING]
they say the whole word,
like this.
105
00:03:45,491 --> 00:03:48,695
HUEY:
Why'd he even move us
out here?
106
00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:50,829
Probably did it
just to make us miserable.
107
00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:53,132
RILEY:
And white people take time out
to study.
108
00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:54,934
[HUFFING]
I hate this place.
109
00:03:55,001 --> 00:03:58,638
RILEY:
And white people arrest you.
110
00:03:58,704 --> 00:03:59,839
Man.
111
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:02,675
[♪♪♪]
112
00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:03,943
RILEY:
Hey!
113
00:04:06,713 --> 00:04:08,681
Looks like the feds.
114
00:04:14,353 --> 00:04:15,555
[CAR DOOR CLOSING]
115
00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:17,589
[DOORBELL RINGS]
116
00:04:17,656 --> 00:04:19,524
Who the hell could be
knockin' on this door
117
00:04:19,591 --> 00:04:21,027
this early in the mornin'?
118
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:23,663
If it's a Jehovah Witness,
I'm kickin' his ass.
119
00:04:23,730 --> 00:04:24,664
Yes?
120
00:04:24,731 --> 00:04:27,133
I'm looking for Robert Freeman.
121
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:28,801
I'm Robert Freeman.
122
00:04:28,868 --> 00:04:30,937
I'm Ed Wuncler.
123
00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:33,172
From Wuncler's
Savings and Loan.
124
00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:35,842
Uh, so?
125
00:04:35,908 --> 00:04:39,045
I own the bank
that owns your house.
126
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,079
Oh, well--
127
00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:41,547
Come in, sir.
128
00:04:41,614 --> 00:04:43,316
Welcome to your house.
129
00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:47,020
[♪♪♪]
130
00:04:47,086 --> 00:04:52,959
Robert, my family founded
Woodcrest over 170 years ago.
131
00:04:53,026 --> 00:04:56,863
I was born here,
and I still live here.
132
00:04:56,929 --> 00:04:59,899
I consider this place
to be family,
133
00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:02,101
and I'm very selective
134
00:05:02,168 --> 00:05:05,872
about who I allow
in to that family.
135
00:05:05,938 --> 00:05:08,274
You understand
what I'm saying, Robert?
136
00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:11,844
Hey, yes,
I totally understand.
137
00:05:11,911 --> 00:05:13,046
Would you like some...
138
00:05:13,112 --> 00:05:14,847
cheese?
139
00:05:15,848 --> 00:05:18,284
Did you just offer me cheese?
140
00:05:18,351 --> 00:05:19,452
Yes, I did.
141
00:05:21,220 --> 00:05:23,623
I'd love some cheese, thank you.
142
00:05:23,690 --> 00:05:24,857
Hm.
143
00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:26,292
Riley!
144
00:05:26,359 --> 00:05:27,860
Go get the fancy cheese.
145
00:05:27,927 --> 00:05:32,098
I'd like to ask some questions,
if you don't mind.
146
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:35,768
Are you gay, and if so,
do you have a gay lover
147
00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:39,105
living with you
in the house?
148
00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:42,075
Gay? No, I'm not gay.
149
00:05:42,141 --> 00:05:44,077
I mean, I happen to think
a man looks nice
150
00:05:44,143 --> 00:05:46,245
with good hair and a ponytail.
151
00:05:46,312 --> 00:05:48,448
But, no, mm-mm, I'm not gay.
152
00:05:48,514 --> 00:05:51,183
What's your position
on gay marriage?
153
00:05:51,250 --> 00:05:52,585
Well, first of all,
154
00:05:52,652 --> 00:05:54,721
I believe all marriage
is wrong.
155
00:05:54,787 --> 00:05:56,589
[LAUGHS]
156
00:05:58,257 --> 00:06:00,259
Good one, good.
157
00:06:00,326 --> 00:06:02,929
Uh, you don't look
like you associate
158
00:06:02,995 --> 00:06:05,264
with any Muslims,
Arabs, you know.
159
00:06:05,331 --> 00:06:07,333
People of terrorist descent?
160
00:06:09,502 --> 00:06:11,637
Uh, well...
161
00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:12,839
RILEY:
We got Kraft,
162
00:06:12,905 --> 00:06:14,574
and we got Velveeta.
163
00:06:18,344 --> 00:06:19,479
Your grandson?
164
00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:20,780
[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]
165
00:06:20,847 --> 00:06:22,482
Afraid so. Ahem.
166
00:06:22,548 --> 00:06:23,582
[GROWLS SOFTLY]
167
00:06:23,649 --> 00:06:26,252
You know, I have a grandson too.
He's--
168
00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:27,754
Is that right?
169
00:06:27,820 --> 00:06:28,855
Well, heh-heh-heh,
170
00:06:28,921 --> 00:06:30,490
this has been delightful.
171
00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:32,992
Well, it's really been
a pleasure, Mr., uh--
172
00:06:33,058 --> 00:06:34,293
I-Own-Everything.
173
00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:35,428
We should get together soon
174
00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:37,964
and have, uh...
more cheese.
175
00:06:38,030 --> 00:06:39,966
Like a nice Brie
or a G-Gouda--
176
00:06:40,032 --> 00:06:41,433
G-Gayda-- Gouda.
177
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:44,337
Heh. You know, you're
my kind of guy, Freeman.
178
00:06:44,403 --> 00:06:45,838
Old school.
179
00:06:46,939 --> 00:06:48,407
What are you doin' tomorrow?
180
00:06:48,474 --> 00:06:49,542
We're throwin' a garden party
181
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:51,210
for my grandson.
182
00:06:51,277 --> 00:06:53,379
He just got back from Iraq.
183
00:06:53,446 --> 00:06:56,783
You should stop by,
meet some of the neighbors.
184
00:06:56,849 --> 00:06:58,084
Bring the kids.
185
00:06:58,151 --> 00:06:59,986
Sounds like a splendid idea.
186
00:07:00,052 --> 00:07:01,154
I'll see you tomorrow.
187
00:07:01,220 --> 00:07:02,622
Uh, thanks for stoppin' by.
188
00:07:02,688 --> 00:07:04,223
Cheers.
189
00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:06,359
[SIGHS]
[GUNSHOT]
190
00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:07,727
[♪♪♪]
191
00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:09,428
Huey!
192
00:07:09,495 --> 00:07:11,164
GRANDDAD:
This damn thing looks real.
193
00:07:11,230 --> 00:07:12,965
Can I have my gun back?
194
00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:14,867
[SCREAMS]
195
00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:15,968
Son of a--!
196
00:07:16,035 --> 00:07:16,969
[MUTTERING]
197
00:07:17,036 --> 00:07:18,471
GRANDDAD:
A garden party?
198
00:07:18,538 --> 00:07:19,806
Yeah, boy.
199
00:07:19,872 --> 00:07:21,240
I might buy sandals
and new underwear.
200
00:07:21,307 --> 00:07:23,476
Oh, you shot me!
201
00:07:23,543 --> 00:07:26,078
Granddad tried
to assassinate me.
202
00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:29,348
Boy, what did I tell ya?
This is the new white man.
203
00:07:29,415 --> 00:07:31,517
He's distinguished.
204
00:07:31,584 --> 00:07:34,620
Granddad, I do not sip tea
with the enemy.
205
00:07:34,687 --> 00:07:36,055
You could force me to go,
206
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:38,691
but you cannot force me
to be someone I'm not.
207
00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:41,260
The hell I can't!
208
00:07:41,327 --> 00:07:43,329
You gonna go and you're
not gonna embarrass me
209
00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:45,531
in front of my new neighbors,
or I'm gonna beat your ass.
210
00:07:45,598 --> 00:07:48,734
Why can't we be ourselves, huh?
Why can't I be me?
211
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:50,837
Are you ashamed of us?
Very.
212
00:07:50,903 --> 00:07:52,305
We never asked
to move here
213
00:07:52,371 --> 00:07:54,574
with your precious
new white people, Granddad.
214
00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:55,707
Didn't ask?
215
00:07:55,775 --> 00:07:56,876
Well, you didn't ask for us
216
00:07:56,943 --> 00:07:58,477
to be attacked
by dogs and fire hoses,
217
00:07:58,544 --> 00:08:00,046
so you can live here,
but we did it anyway.
218
00:08:00,112 --> 00:08:02,915
Oh, here he go again with
the dogs and the fire hoses.
219
00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:05,384
Shoot, we were attacked
by dogs and fire hoses.
220
00:08:05,451 --> 00:08:06,886
Were you attacked?
221
00:08:08,454 --> 00:08:09,956
I-I don't know what difference
that makes.
222
00:08:10,022 --> 00:08:12,258
Because it's like
the whole generation
223
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:14,794
tries to take credit for
what happened to some people.
224
00:08:14,861 --> 00:08:16,929
That's ridiculous.
225
00:08:16,996 --> 00:08:18,598
Now, see--
Well, you know--
226
00:08:18,664 --> 00:08:20,266
Uh, what had happened was...
227
00:08:20,332 --> 00:08:22,001
[♪♪♪]
[SIRENS WAILING]
228
00:08:22,068 --> 00:08:23,703
MAN:
Get out of here.
Go, go, go!
229
00:08:23,769 --> 00:08:25,972
MAN:
Come on, get out of here.
230
00:08:26,038 --> 00:08:27,206
Aw, man.
231
00:08:27,273 --> 00:08:29,709
I missed it.
Was it bad?
232
00:08:29,775 --> 00:08:31,377
Did they do the thing
with the fire hoses?
233
00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:33,279
What do you think, chump?
234
00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:34,947
Damn, what's eatin' you?
235
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:36,948
A goddamn German shepherd,
that's what.
236
00:08:37,015 --> 00:08:37,950
Where was you?
237
00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:39,952
I-I had to go back
to the apartment
238
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:41,120
'cause I forgot
my raincoat.
239
00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:42,621
You went to--? You--?
240
00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:45,258
This nigga went to get
a motherfuckin' raincoat.
241
00:08:45,324 --> 00:08:46,759
I can't believe you.
242
00:08:46,826 --> 00:08:48,628
We all been watchin'
the same news.
243
00:08:48,694 --> 00:08:51,163
The police been doin'
this fire hose thing all week.
244
00:08:51,230 --> 00:08:53,065
I just assumed
we'd all wear our raincoat.
245
00:08:53,132 --> 00:08:54,165
Damn it, Robert.
246
00:08:54,233 --> 00:08:56,168
Who the hell comes
to a march with a raincoat?
247
00:08:56,235 --> 00:08:57,570
Bet you wish
you had a coat now.
248
00:08:57,637 --> 00:08:59,438
You son of a bitch!
249
00:08:59,505 --> 00:09:02,108
GRANDDAD:
Remember what Dr. King said!
250
00:09:02,174 --> 00:09:04,610
Who actually got hit with
the fire hose ain't important.
251
00:09:04,677 --> 00:09:05,845
Now, we goin' to this party,
252
00:09:05,912 --> 00:09:08,648
and your black asses
are gonna behave.
253
00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:12,151
If I'm lucky, I'll find myself
a nice white woman
254
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:15,021
with a flat booty
who'll listen to my problems.
255
00:09:15,087 --> 00:09:16,289
[♪♪♪]
256
00:09:19,258 --> 00:09:21,260
[♪♪♪]
257
00:09:25,531 --> 00:09:28,334
GRANDDAD:
Now, the word for the day
is "behave."
258
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:29,936
H-E-A-V-E.
259
00:09:30,002 --> 00:09:30,970
Behave.
260
00:09:31,037 --> 00:09:32,171
I'm comin', I'm comin'.
261
00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:34,607
Excuse me. Out of the way,
Kunta Kinte! Yes, sir.
262
00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:36,776
How can I help ya?
263
00:09:36,842 --> 00:09:38,377
GRANDDAD:
Excuse me?
264
00:09:40,613 --> 00:09:43,816
Oh, Lord have mercy.
Security. Security.
265
00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:45,384
We got a Code Black.
266
00:09:45,451 --> 00:09:47,620
Code Black at the main gate.
267
00:09:47,687 --> 00:09:49,522
MAN [OVER RADIO]: ¦
Ruckus, what the hell
268
00:09:49,588 --> 00:09:50,990
is a Code Black?
269
00:09:51,057 --> 00:09:52,558
There are some hungry-lookin'
270
00:09:52,625 --> 00:09:54,560
niggas at the front gate.
271
00:09:54,627 --> 00:09:55,895
What y'all doin' here?
272
00:09:55,962 --> 00:09:58,364
Deliveries are in the back.
273
00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,799
Well, my name is Robert Freeman,
274
00:09:59,865 --> 00:10:01,968
I was invited here
by Ed Wuncler.
275
00:10:02,034 --> 00:10:05,404
Well, I'm Ruckus.
Uncle Ruckus, no relation.
276
00:10:05,471 --> 00:10:07,640
And I work for Mr. Wuncler.
277
00:10:07,707 --> 00:10:09,075
And you slick niggas
278
00:10:09,141 --> 00:10:11,911
ain't gonna fast-talk your way
into this here party.
279
00:10:11,978 --> 00:10:13,879
Ruckus, what the hell
are you doing?
280
00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:14,847
Uh, Mr. Freeman,
281
00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:17,383
I'm sorry.
Please, come this way.
282
00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:18,617
GRANDDAD:
See, boys?
283
00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:20,853
And you thought we'd be
the only black people.
284
00:10:24,924 --> 00:10:26,959
[♪♪♪]
285
00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:36,402
[TRIO PLAYING CLASSICAL MUSIC]
286
00:10:48,147 --> 00:10:49,515
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
287
00:11:06,866 --> 00:11:08,501
WUNCLER:
Robert!
288
00:11:10,369 --> 00:11:13,372
Glad you made it, Robert.
This is my grandson, Ed III.
289
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:14,440
How are you?
290
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:16,042
Whassup y'all, what's good?
291
00:11:17,877 --> 00:11:20,479
Uh...so I understand
you just got back from Iraq.
292
00:11:20,546 --> 00:11:21,614
For real?
293
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:22,948
Yo, what's it like?
294
00:11:23,015 --> 00:11:24,850
What's it like?
295
00:11:24,917 --> 00:11:26,552
What I supposed
to say to that?
296
00:11:26,619 --> 00:11:29,221
It was cool, there was bitches?
297
00:11:29,288 --> 00:11:31,223
Okay, there was bitches,
but a lot of them had,
298
00:11:31,290 --> 00:11:32,858
you know, they was covered up
299
00:11:32,925 --> 00:11:34,727
in them curtains and stuff
they be wearin'.
300
00:11:34,794 --> 00:11:37,096
But I digress.
301
00:11:37,163 --> 00:11:38,697
It was war!
302
00:11:38,764 --> 00:11:40,199
It was war, basically.
303
00:11:40,266 --> 00:11:41,467
War, you know what that's like?
304
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,169
Motherfuckers be,
like, shootin':
305
00:11:43,235 --> 00:11:45,805
[IMITATING MACHINE GUN SOUND]
306
00:11:45,871 --> 00:11:47,273
Bombs blowin' up.
307
00:11:47,339 --> 00:11:48,774
And, you know,
the shit scared me.
308
00:11:48,841 --> 00:11:50,076
It scared the shit out of me.
309
00:11:50,142 --> 00:11:52,578
Matter of fact, I shit on myself
over a dozen times
310
00:11:52,645 --> 00:11:55,681
and ran out of toilet paper
after the second time.
311
00:11:55,748 --> 00:11:59,251
So you know
what that meant, right?
312
00:11:59,318 --> 00:12:02,121
I had to use the thumb, man.
It was kind of nasty.
313
00:12:02,188 --> 00:12:03,889
But, you know,
the good thing about it
314
00:12:03,956 --> 00:12:05,658
was they stopped taking me
out on patrol.
315
00:12:05,724 --> 00:12:07,226
'Cause my name
became "Stink Bomb."
316
00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:08,527
You know what I'm sayin'?
317
00:12:08,594 --> 00:12:10,529
They said, you know,
I was giving away our position
318
00:12:10,596 --> 00:12:12,064
because of the shit smell.
319
00:12:12,131 --> 00:12:14,066
That was fine with me,
you know what I'm sayin'.
320
00:12:14,133 --> 00:12:15,468
They-- They wanted
to leave me back.
321
00:12:15,534 --> 00:12:17,303
And I was like:
"Well, fuck y'all.
322
00:12:17,369 --> 00:12:19,905
"Y'all go ahead on 'cause
I don't need y'all anyway.
323
00:12:19,972 --> 00:12:22,108
I'm rich, bitch."
324
00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:27,613
The fuck y'all looking at?
325
00:12:27,680 --> 00:12:29,415
Hey, li'l man.
326
00:12:31,050 --> 00:12:32,151
Like guns?
327
00:12:32,218 --> 00:12:33,486
Yeah!
328
00:12:33,552 --> 00:12:35,354
C'mon.
329
00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:37,590
Come on, let's get that drink.
330
00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:44,563
[♪♪♪]
331
00:12:44,630 --> 00:12:47,165
MAN:
Well, you should definitely see
The Passion.
332
00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:48,834
It's a very important movie.
333
00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:50,836
Couldn't see it.
White Jesus.
334
00:12:50,903 --> 00:12:52,471
Excuse me?
335
00:12:52,538 --> 00:12:53,672
Come on, man.
336
00:12:53,739 --> 00:12:56,408
It's supposed to be
all historically accurate,
337
00:12:56,475 --> 00:12:57,977
and they still have
a white man
338
00:12:58,043 --> 00:12:59,311
playin' Jesus?
339
00:12:59,378 --> 00:13:02,047
That's some old bullshit.
340
00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:04,483
Young man,
you speak so well.
341
00:13:08,921 --> 00:13:10,022
RUCKUS:
Well,
342
00:13:10,089 --> 00:13:12,057
la-di-da-di-do.
343
00:13:12,124 --> 00:13:14,193
Look like we got us
the winner
344
00:13:14,260 --> 00:13:17,496
of the Lucky-Nigga-of-the-Year
award.
345
00:13:19,098 --> 00:13:20,166
Ah.
346
00:13:20,232 --> 00:13:24,003
They must think
the sun shine out your ass.
347
00:13:24,069 --> 00:13:26,372
Mr. Wuncler's
been very nice, yes.
348
00:13:26,438 --> 00:13:29,408
They must think you
Sidney fucking Poitier.
349
00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:30,609
Well,
350
00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:33,379
I been workin'
for Mr. Wuncler for 20 years.
351
00:13:33,445 --> 00:13:36,048
I ain't never got invited
to the party.
352
00:13:36,115 --> 00:13:39,418
Shoot, he don't even let me
use the front door.
353
00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:40,986
But you wouldn't know
about that,
354
00:13:41,053 --> 00:13:44,256
now, would ya, Mr. Tibbs?
355
00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:46,058
Oh, yeah.
356
00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:48,460
They must think
your shit smell
357
00:13:48,527 --> 00:13:51,997
like spring daisies
and cinnamon.
358
00:13:52,064 --> 00:13:53,132
[♪♪♪]
359
00:13:53,199 --> 00:13:54,567
Check this out.
360
00:13:54,633 --> 00:13:55,601
Wow.
361
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:58,771
Are those real?
362
00:13:58,837 --> 00:14:00,406
Real?
363
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:02,441
Put it this way:
364
00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:05,778
if I pick one up
and put it to your face,
365
00:14:05,844 --> 00:14:08,180
pull the trigger,
will you be dead?
366
00:14:09,281 --> 00:14:11,917
[GASPS]
367
00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:15,554
HUEY:
And all I'm saying is,
368
00:14:15,621 --> 00:14:17,890
Ronald Reagan was the devil.
369
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:21,727
You are such
an articulate young man.
370
00:14:21,794 --> 00:14:23,329
I'm tryin' to explain to you
371
00:14:23,395 --> 00:14:25,431
that Ronald Reagan was
the devil.
372
00:14:25,497 --> 00:14:27,399
Ronald Wilson Reagan.
373
00:14:27,466 --> 00:14:29,335
Each of his names
has six letters.
374
00:14:29,401 --> 00:14:31,303
Six-six-six.
375
00:14:31,370 --> 00:14:32,805
Man, doesn't
that offend you?
376
00:14:32,871 --> 00:14:35,307
[LAUGHING]
I love this kid.
377
00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:37,376
Stop that.
What are you doin'?
378
00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:38,811
Stop clappin'.
379
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:42,348
Having a good time, Robert?
380
00:14:42,414 --> 00:14:44,116
I-It's, uh...
381
00:14:44,183 --> 00:14:46,518
Come on,
have a drink with me.
382
00:14:46,585 --> 00:14:48,787
You look nervous.
383
00:14:48,854 --> 00:14:52,958
Do I make you nervous,
Free-man?
384
00:14:53,025 --> 00:14:54,960
Nervous? No.
385
00:14:55,027 --> 00:14:58,731
I was just, uh, keepin' an eye
out for the boys.
386
00:14:58,797 --> 00:15:00,866
This is a lovely party.
387
00:15:00,933 --> 00:15:03,168
The only joy
I get from these parties
388
00:15:03,235 --> 00:15:06,071
is standing around,
telling mean-spirited jokes
389
00:15:06,138 --> 00:15:08,240
at other people's expense.
390
00:15:08,307 --> 00:15:09,975
I do that too.
391
00:15:10,042 --> 00:15:11,443
Check out that guy.
392
00:15:11,510 --> 00:15:15,848
Why is his face
all twisted up like that?
393
00:15:15,914 --> 00:15:18,350
Looks like he jacks off
with Icy Hot.
394
00:15:18,417 --> 00:15:21,387
[BOTH LAUGHING]
395
00:15:21,453 --> 00:15:24,423
He looks like
he just shit a gerbil.
396
00:15:24,490 --> 00:15:27,159
[BOTH LAUGHING]
397
00:15:28,627 --> 00:15:29,662
A gerbil.
398
00:15:31,063 --> 00:15:33,432
Sorry, I'll be right back.
399
00:15:35,968 --> 00:15:37,169
HUEY:
Tell me this,
400
00:15:37,236 --> 00:15:39,071
why was all the video recordin'
401
00:15:39,138 --> 00:15:41,340
of the Pentagon attack
seized by the FBI
402
00:15:41,407 --> 00:15:42,908
and never seen again?
403
00:15:42,975 --> 00:15:45,044
He speaks so well.
404
00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:46,378
He's adorable.
405
00:15:46,445 --> 00:15:47,680
Are you even listenin'
406
00:15:47,746 --> 00:15:49,515
to what I'm sayin'?
[YELLS]
407
00:15:49,581 --> 00:15:51,116
Nigga, if you ruin
this party for me,
408
00:15:51,183 --> 00:15:53,986
I'll put my--
Ruin the party? They love me.
409
00:15:54,053 --> 00:15:55,654
These people aren't worried
about us.
410
00:15:55,721 --> 00:15:58,557
They're not worried
about anything. They're rich.
411
00:15:58,624 --> 00:15:59,758
No matter what happens,
412
00:15:59,825 --> 00:16:02,227
these people will
just keep applaudin'.
413
00:16:02,294 --> 00:16:03,562
[CROWD APPLAUDING]
414
00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:06,398
[MICROPHONE FEEDBACK]
415
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:08,033
RUCKUS [OVER SPEAKER]:
Ahem. Attention please.
416
00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:12,338
My name is Uncle Ruckus,
no relation.
417
00:16:12,404 --> 00:16:16,875
I want to sing y'all a brand
new song I just wrote called:
418
00:16:16,942 --> 00:16:19,745
"Don't Trust Them New Niggas
Over There."
419
00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:22,648
Sing along
if you know the words.
420
00:16:22,715 --> 00:16:24,450
[MICROPHONE FEEDBACK]
[CLEARS THROAT]
421
00:16:24,516 --> 00:16:27,353
[SINGS NOTES]
422
00:16:27,419 --> 00:16:31,590
♪ Don't trust them new niggas
Over there ♪
423
00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:35,794
♪ Leavin' they nigga essence
In the air ♪
424
00:16:35,861 --> 00:16:38,831
♪ Them happy
Nappy-head niggas ♪
425
00:16:38,897 --> 00:16:40,432
♪ With their fingers ♪
[PIANO PLAYING]
426
00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:41,934
♪ On the triggers ♪
427
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:46,071
♪ Don't trust them new niggas
Over there ♪
428
00:16:46,138 --> 00:16:49,942
Are you sure that vest'll stop
this shotgun?
429
00:16:50,008 --> 00:16:53,445
Man, I'm like the Terminator
in this vest.
430
00:16:54,913 --> 00:16:57,249
RUCKUS:
♪ What the hell
They doin' here anyway? ♪
431
00:16:57,316 --> 00:16:58,384
[BURPS]
432
00:16:58,450 --> 00:17:00,486
What? You don't believe me?
433
00:17:00,552 --> 00:17:02,254
Go ahead!
434
00:17:02,321 --> 00:17:03,422
Pull the trigger.
435
00:17:03,489 --> 00:17:06,125
Now, are you sure that--?
436
00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:07,726
I said pull that trigger now!
437
00:17:07,792 --> 00:17:09,694
You wanna play rough?
438
00:17:09,762 --> 00:17:10,929
Okay.
439
00:17:10,996 --> 00:17:15,267
♪ Don't trust them big nostrils
Over yonder ♪
440
00:17:15,334 --> 00:17:20,005
♪ They'll suck up so much air
It'll make you wonder ♪
441
00:17:20,071 --> 00:17:22,207
♪ Don't trust them new niggas ♪
442
00:17:22,273 --> 00:17:25,277
♪ With their squatty little
Nigga-figures ♪
443
00:17:25,344 --> 00:17:28,781
♪ Don't trust them new niggas ♪
444
00:17:28,847 --> 00:17:31,383
♪ Over there ♪
445
00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:35,421
[GROANS]
446
00:17:35,487 --> 00:17:38,824
I think the N-word is okay,
as long as they say it.
447
00:17:41,093 --> 00:17:43,162
See?
[GRUMBLES]
448
00:17:43,228 --> 00:17:45,964
Say hello to my little friend.
449
00:17:47,232 --> 00:17:48,967
[BOTH SCREAM]
450
00:17:58,243 --> 00:17:59,445
Fuck y'all lookin' at?
451
00:18:09,521 --> 00:18:11,223
[PIANO PLAYING NEW SONG]
452
00:18:18,297 --> 00:18:20,632
Hey, you think we in trouble?
453
00:18:20,699 --> 00:18:22,768
You shot his grandson
out the window.
454
00:18:22,835 --> 00:18:23,936
What you think?
455
00:18:24,002 --> 00:18:25,237
[HUFFS]
456
00:18:26,271 --> 00:18:27,272
I don't know.
457
00:18:27,339 --> 00:18:28,574
I didn't want to move here,
458
00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:31,376
but I don't really want Granddad
to lose his house.
459
00:18:31,443 --> 00:18:33,812
He worked his whole life
to get here.
460
00:18:33,879 --> 00:18:37,549
Man, I like that house.
461
00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:40,219
Oh, well,
I shot a nigga!
462
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:41,386
[LAUGHS]
463
00:18:44,723 --> 00:18:46,458
Mr. Wuncler,
464
00:18:46,525 --> 00:18:50,462
I'm...sorry about
the whole, you know,
465
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:52,631
my grandson shooting
your grandson
466
00:18:52,698 --> 00:18:55,033
out of the window thing.
467
00:18:55,100 --> 00:18:56,168
Are you mad?
468
00:18:56,235 --> 00:18:58,270
In 30 years,
469
00:18:58,337 --> 00:19:02,708
that boy will be the president
of the United States.
470
00:19:02,774 --> 00:19:05,210
And he'll still
be a fucking idiot.
471
00:19:05,277 --> 00:19:07,212
Whew.
472
00:19:07,279 --> 00:19:10,015
Now, are we gonna have
that drink or what?
473
00:19:11,683 --> 00:19:13,886
Glad you were able
to make it, Robert.
474
00:19:13,952 --> 00:19:15,387
To the old school.
475
00:19:15,454 --> 00:19:17,189
To the old school.
476
00:19:17,256 --> 00:19:20,192
[♪♪♪]
32626
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