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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,941 --> 00:00:08,710 OH, HI, NINA. 2 00:00:08,743 --> 00:00:11,012 WOULD YOU STAND UP ON THE DESK AND ADJUST THAT VENT? 3 00:00:11,045 --> 00:00:12,714 IT'S BLOWING RIGHT IN MY FACE. 4 00:00:12,747 --> 00:00:15,016 OH, YEAH. I'LL GET TO THAT REAL SOON. 5 00:00:15,049 --> 00:00:17,552 UNTIL THEN, YOU JUST DO IT YOURSELF. 6 00:00:19,187 --> 00:00:22,056 FAIR ENOUGH. 7 00:00:22,090 --> 00:00:23,558 OH, HI, DICK. 8 00:00:23,592 --> 00:00:26,060 WOULD YOU ADJUST MY VENT? 9 00:00:29,463 --> 00:00:31,365 WITH NINA IN THE ROOM? 10 00:00:32,433 --> 00:00:35,069 GET UP ON THE DESK AND ADJUST MY VENT. 11 00:00:35,103 --> 00:00:38,439 OH, OF COURSE. NINA, PLEASE LEAVE THE ROOM. 12 00:00:38,472 --> 00:00:40,308 NO PROBLEM. 13 00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:45,213 I, UH, I CAN'T REACH IT FROM HERE. 14 00:00:45,246 --> 00:00:47,181 PUT YOUR FOOT ON THE CHAIR. 15 00:00:47,215 --> 00:00:47,782 ARE YOU SURE? 16 00:00:47,816 --> 00:00:49,951 IT'S--IT'S WOBBLY. 17 00:00:49,984 --> 00:00:50,919 I'LL HOLD IT DOWN. 18 00:00:50,952 --> 00:00:52,621 WELL, ALL RIGHT. 19 00:00:52,654 --> 00:00:54,288 A LITTLE FURTHER. 20 00:00:56,825 --> 00:00:58,326 UH, THERE. HOW'S THAT? 21 00:00:58,359 --> 00:00:59,894 HOLD ON. I'LL CHECK. 22 00:00:59,928 --> 00:01:01,596 AAH! 23 00:01:01,630 --> 00:01:04,398 MY FOOT! MY FOOT! 24 00:01:04,432 --> 00:01:06,567 OH, I'M SO SORRY! I'M SO SORRY! 25 00:01:06,601 --> 00:01:09,570 IT SHOULD'VE BEEN YOU! IT SHOULD'VE BEEN YOU! 26 00:01:41,535 --> 00:01:42,971 THAT SHOULD DO IT, DR. SOLOMON. 27 00:01:43,004 --> 00:01:45,874 THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE. I FEEL NO PAIN. 28 00:01:45,907 --> 00:01:49,043 YOU MAY FEEL SOME DISCOMFORT WHEN THE SHOT WEARS OFF. 29 00:01:49,077 --> 00:01:54,615 NO. OBVIOUSLY, THE FALL HAS MADE ME IMPERVIOUS TO PAIN. 30 00:01:54,649 --> 00:01:58,152 YOU SHOULD GO HOME AND TRY TO STAY OFF YOUR FOOT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. 31 00:01:58,186 --> 00:02:00,054 KEEP IT ELEVATED, KEEP ICE ON IT. 32 00:02:00,088 --> 00:02:02,156 JUST USE GOOD JUDGMENT. 33 00:02:02,190 --> 00:02:06,527 I HAVE EXCELLENT JUDGMENT. 34 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:09,063 NINA, HAND ME THE STAPLE GUN. 35 00:02:11,132 --> 00:02:12,266 CALL ME IF YOU NEED ME. 36 00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:13,567 OH, THANK YOU, DOCTOR. 37 00:02:13,601 --> 00:02:14,936 I'LL TAKE HIM HOME RIGHT NOW. 38 00:02:14,969 --> 00:02:16,437 I CAN DRIVE MYSELF. 39 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:19,674 OH, DON'T BE SILLY. IT'S THE LEAST I CAN DO. 40 00:02:19,708 --> 00:02:21,976 I'LL TAKE YOU HOME, COME BACK HERE, PICK UP MY CAR, 41 00:02:22,010 --> 00:02:24,879 GO TO THE DRUGSTORE, THE GROCERY STORE, PICK UP ANYTHING YOU NEED. 42 00:02:24,913 --> 00:02:26,114 OK. 43 00:02:26,147 --> 00:02:28,382 I'LL JUST BRING THE CAR AROUND. 44 00:02:30,919 --> 00:02:32,186 WHY IS SHE DOING THIS? 45 00:02:32,220 --> 00:02:33,421 SIT BACK AND RELAX. 46 00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:36,057 YOU'RE IN PAIN. SHE KNOWS SHE CAUSED IT. SHE FEELS GUILTY. 47 00:02:36,090 --> 00:02:37,591 WHY SHOULD SHE BE GUILTY? 48 00:02:37,625 --> 00:02:39,560 I'M NOT IN PAIN. 49 00:02:39,593 --> 00:02:42,196 I HAVE A SUPERHUMAN THRESHOLD FOR PAIN. 50 00:02:42,230 --> 00:02:44,933 [SHOOTING STAPLES] 51 00:02:47,135 --> 00:02:49,270 WAAAH! 52 00:02:55,209 --> 00:02:56,978 AND VOILÄ. 53 00:02:59,013 --> 00:03:00,148 HARRY? 54 00:03:00,181 --> 00:03:02,383 Harry: I'M IN MY ROOM. 55 00:03:06,955 --> 00:03:07,756 HARRY, THIS ISN'T A ROOM. 56 00:03:07,789 --> 00:03:10,491 THIS IS A SHOWER CURTAIN IN A HALLWAY. 57 00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:12,193 IS THAT SO? 58 00:03:12,226 --> 00:03:15,496 THEN WHY ARE MY LINENS HERE? 59 00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:18,132 BECAUSE YOUR LINENS FELL OFF THE WASHING MACHINE. 60 00:03:18,166 --> 00:03:20,168 I'M SICK OF SLEEPING ON THE WASHING MACHINE. 61 00:03:20,201 --> 00:03:24,538 OH, SURE, A VIBRATING BED IMPRESSES THE LADIES. 62 00:03:24,572 --> 00:03:26,640 BUT I WANT MY OWN ROOM. 63 00:03:26,674 --> 00:03:28,542 DICK SAID THAT I COULD HAVE ONE. 64 00:03:28,576 --> 00:03:31,846 NO. DICK SAID THAT UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES COULD YOU HAVE YOUR OWN ROOM. 65 00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:34,983 LET'S NOT QUIBBLE OVER SEMANTICS. 66 00:03:35,016 --> 00:03:37,418 BESIDES, YOU GUYS HAVE YOUR OWN ROOMS. 67 00:03:37,451 --> 00:03:39,720 I SLEEP IN A STORAGE SPACE BEHIND DICK'S CHIMNEY. 68 00:03:39,754 --> 00:03:45,026 AND MY ROOM IS AN UNINSULATED ALCOVE OVERLOOKING A TOILET. 69 00:03:45,059 --> 00:03:46,995 ROOM WITH A VIEW. 70 00:03:47,028 --> 00:03:49,063 RUB IT IN. 71 00:03:50,264 --> 00:03:52,901 HARRY, YOU CAN'T SLEEP IN THE HALLWAY. 72 00:03:52,934 --> 00:03:55,336 HOMEWRECKER! 73 00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:58,239 [DICK MOANING] 74 00:03:58,272 --> 00:03:59,307 Sally: WHAT'S WRONG? 75 00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:01,009 OOH. OOH. SHE HURT ME. 76 00:04:01,042 --> 00:04:02,110 IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. 77 00:04:02,143 --> 00:04:03,978 SOME ACCIDENT. 78 00:04:04,012 --> 00:04:06,514 WE CAN MAKE ACCIDENTS HAPPEN, TOO, LADY. 79 00:04:07,681 --> 00:04:09,617 HERE. LET ME ELEVATE THAT FOOT. 80 00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:12,386 AAH! OH! NO TOUCHY! NO TOUCHY! 81 00:04:12,420 --> 00:04:13,421 NO TOUCHY. 82 00:04:13,454 --> 00:04:16,224 OH, WHAT DID MY BODY EVER DO TO DESERVE THIS? 83 00:04:16,257 --> 00:04:19,293 WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU? MARY, TURN IT OFF! 84 00:04:19,327 --> 00:04:20,528 I CAN'T. 85 00:04:20,561 --> 00:04:23,364 THE DOCTOR SAID HE DOESN'T GIVE DRUGS FOR A SPRAIN. 86 00:04:23,397 --> 00:04:25,533 BUT THAT'S GOOD NEWS, ISN'T IT? 87 00:04:25,566 --> 00:04:26,901 IT'S NOT BROKEN. 88 00:04:26,935 --> 00:04:29,670 I HEARD THAT SOMETIMES A SPRAIN CAN BE WORSE THAN A BREAK. 89 00:04:29,703 --> 00:04:30,338 Sally: IS THAT ONE WORSE? 90 00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:32,540 YES! YES, IT IS! MUCH WORSE! 91 00:04:32,573 --> 00:04:34,675 I SAID I WAS SORRY. 92 00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:35,977 CAN I FIX YOU SOMETHING TO EAT? 93 00:04:36,010 --> 00:04:37,045 JUST FIX MY FOOT. 94 00:04:37,078 --> 00:04:38,279 I DON'T CARE IF I STARVE. 95 00:04:38,312 --> 00:04:40,181 JUST FIX MY FOOT! 96 00:04:40,214 --> 00:04:43,217 Mary: I'LL GET YOU SOME ICE. 97 00:04:43,251 --> 00:04:47,521 LOOK AT MY FOOT. IT'S ONE BIG BOO-BOO. 98 00:04:47,555 --> 00:04:49,157 DICK, YOU SOUND PRETTY PATHETIC. 99 00:04:49,190 --> 00:04:52,126 IS IT PATHETIC TO SPRAIN YOUR FOOT WORSE THAN ANYBODY EVER 100 00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:54,762 IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD? SALLY! 101 00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:56,264 I'M SORRY, DICK. 102 00:04:56,297 --> 00:05:00,068 YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT EARTH PAIN UNTIL YOU'VE BEEN A WOMAN, OK? 103 00:05:00,101 --> 00:05:04,138 ONE WEEK EVERY MONTH I FEEL LIKE I'VE GOT A PAIR OF PLIERS IN MY PANTS. 104 00:05:04,172 --> 00:05:07,175 YOU'VE GOT A BOO-BOO? I'M IN THE NATIONAL GUARD OF PAIN. 105 00:05:09,077 --> 00:05:09,844 WHAT WAS I THINKING? 106 00:05:09,878 --> 00:05:12,213 I'M SO STUPID. OH, I AM SO STUPID! 107 00:05:12,246 --> 00:05:14,883 MARY SEEMS TO UNDERSTAND MY PAIN. 108 00:05:14,916 --> 00:05:18,887 DICK, I, TOO, UNDERSTAND YOUR PAIN. 109 00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:19,587 IT'S RIGHT HERE. 110 00:05:19,620 --> 00:05:21,722 AAH! 111 00:05:28,596 --> 00:05:31,265 ALL RIGHT, PRESSMAN, 2 BOXES. 112 00:05:31,299 --> 00:05:34,102 RAFSANJANI, ONE BOX. 113 00:05:34,135 --> 00:05:36,070 SOLOMON... 114 00:05:36,104 --> 00:05:38,139 15? 115 00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:41,642 YOU REALLY THINK YOU CAN SELL 15 BOXES OF CHOCOLATE? 116 00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:44,378 SELL? 117 00:05:44,412 --> 00:05:45,213 THAT'S RIGHT. 118 00:05:45,246 --> 00:05:46,514 AFTER SCHOOL, ON THE WEEKENDS, 119 00:05:46,547 --> 00:05:48,416 UNTIL EVERY BAR OF CHOCOLATE IS SOLD. 120 00:05:48,449 --> 00:05:49,918 NO ONE'S GONNA WANT TO BUY THIS CRAP. 121 00:05:49,951 --> 00:05:52,020 IT DOESN'T EVEN HAVE RAISINS. 122 00:05:52,053 --> 00:05:53,988 I'LL GIVE YOU RAISINS. OR NOUGAT. 123 00:05:54,022 --> 00:05:55,856 I'M GONNA NOUGAT YOU, SOLOMON. 124 00:05:55,890 --> 00:05:57,558 WHAT DO I GET FOR SELLING THIS CRAP? 125 00:05:57,591 --> 00:06:01,395 YOU GET THE SATISFACTION OF HELPING TO PAY TO SEND THE BAND TO WASHINGTON. 126 00:06:01,429 --> 00:06:03,031 HOW'S THAT FOR COMPENSATION? 127 00:06:03,064 --> 00:06:05,766 OH, FINE. COOL. 128 00:06:14,442 --> 00:06:16,477 I BROUGHT YOU SOME SOUP. 129 00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:20,181 LET ME JUST FIX THIS FOR YOU. 130 00:06:20,214 --> 00:06:21,649 AAH! 131 00:06:24,953 --> 00:06:26,020 EAT YOUR SOUP. 132 00:06:26,054 --> 00:06:27,255 OK. 133 00:06:27,288 --> 00:06:30,424 [MUTTERING] 134 00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:33,027 MM. THIS TASTES SUMPTUOUS. 135 00:06:33,061 --> 00:06:34,929 MY MOTHER USED TO MAKE THIS SOUP FOR ME WHENEVER I WAS-- 136 00:06:34,963 --> 00:06:39,033 DID SHE ALWAYS SERVE IT THIS COLD? 137 00:06:39,067 --> 00:06:40,201 I'LL HEAT IT UP SOME MORE. 138 00:06:40,234 --> 00:06:43,637 THANK YOU, MARY. THANK YOU. 139 00:06:45,573 --> 00:06:49,010 OH, OH, OHH... 140 00:06:49,043 --> 00:06:50,044 IS SOMETHING WRONG? 141 00:06:50,078 --> 00:06:55,249 OH. NO, BUT COULD YOU ALSO GET ME SOME CRACKERS? 142 00:06:55,283 --> 00:06:56,985 SURE. 143 00:06:59,553 --> 00:07:01,655 OH, OH, OHH... 144 00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:04,892 ARE YOU OK? 145 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:07,161 OYSTER CRACKERS? 146 00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:13,434 OH, OH, OHH... 147 00:07:16,170 --> 00:07:18,072 OH! OH! OHH! 148 00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:23,611 MARY, I JUST WANTED TO SAY I'M SO HAPPY 149 00:07:23,644 --> 00:07:26,547 THAT IT WAS YOU WHO HURT ME SO HORRIBLY. 150 00:07:27,915 --> 00:07:29,283 ALL RIGHT. 151 00:07:29,317 --> 00:07:32,920 I'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH YOUR SOUP AND CRACKERS. 152 00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:34,555 OHH! 153 00:07:34,588 --> 00:07:37,058 Mary: OYSTER CRACKERS! 154 00:07:37,091 --> 00:07:38,626 MY GOD! 155 00:07:38,659 --> 00:07:41,062 I HAVE A MAGIC FOOT! 156 00:07:46,300 --> 00:07:47,501 SALLY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 157 00:07:47,535 --> 00:07:49,003 EATING YOUR SOUP. YOU CAN'T DO THAT. 158 00:07:49,037 --> 00:07:50,038 IT'S NOT THAT TERRIBLE. 159 00:07:50,071 --> 00:07:51,139 YOU PUT A BUNCH OF OYSTER CRACKERS IN IT, 160 00:07:51,172 --> 00:07:53,474 YOU CAN BARELY TASTE IT. 161 00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:54,708 DON'T EAT ALL OF THESE. 162 00:07:54,742 --> 00:07:56,177 DICK IS LYING IN THERE HURT. 163 00:07:56,210 --> 00:07:57,478 WELL, I'M FINE, AND I'M HUNGRY. 164 00:07:57,511 --> 00:08:00,814 BESIDES, I'M NOT THE ONE WHO BROKE HIS FOOT. 165 00:08:00,848 --> 00:08:02,516 SPRAINED. 166 00:08:02,550 --> 00:08:04,452 HAVE A LITTLE COMPASSION, SALLY. 167 00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:06,587 WE'RE HEALTHY. WE HAVE TO HELP HIM. 168 00:08:06,620 --> 00:08:09,723 I SAY HE'S LAME. SHOOT HIM. 169 00:08:11,292 --> 00:08:13,861 AND VOILÄ! 170 00:08:19,767 --> 00:08:21,402 HARRY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE? 171 00:08:21,435 --> 00:08:24,272 DANCING TO THE NATURAL SOUNDS OF PLUMBING. 172 00:08:24,305 --> 00:08:26,307 OK, WELL, GET OUT, 'CAUSE I GOTTA USE THE BATHROOM. 173 00:08:26,340 --> 00:08:28,576 YOU CAN'T KICK ME OUT OF MY OWN ROOM. 174 00:08:28,609 --> 00:08:31,245 OK, PILGRIM. IT'S YOUR FUNERAL. 175 00:08:31,279 --> 00:08:34,082 OHH! NO, NO, NO, NO. 176 00:08:41,489 --> 00:08:43,023 HI, MY NAME'S TOMMY SOLOMON. 177 00:08:43,057 --> 00:08:44,125 I'M SELLING CHOCOLATE BARS 178 00:08:44,158 --> 00:08:46,927 TO SEND THE HIGH SCHOOL BAND TO WASHINGTON. 179 00:08:50,564 --> 00:08:53,734 HEY, FAT GUY, IS THIS A DREAM OR WHAT? 180 00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:56,070 CANDY, DOOR TO DOOR-- 181 00:08:58,672 --> 00:08:59,473 HI, FATHER. 182 00:08:59,507 --> 00:09:01,209 I'M TRYING TO SELL THESE CHOCOLATE BARS 183 00:09:01,242 --> 00:09:04,745 SO THE HIGH SCHOOL BAND CAN GO TO WASHINGTON. 184 00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:07,715 AND LEARN ABOUT CHRISTIANITY. 185 00:09:08,316 --> 00:09:11,152 AND, UH, BECOME PRIESTS. 186 00:09:12,820 --> 00:09:13,854 Tommy: FINE, THEN. 187 00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:16,690 THEY'LL STAY HERE IN RUTHERFORD AND WORSHIP SATAN! 188 00:09:19,193 --> 00:09:21,562 NOW, THIS IS WHAT I CALL A ROOM. 189 00:09:21,595 --> 00:09:23,964 I'VE GOT EVERYTHING A MAN COULD NEED. 190 00:09:23,997 --> 00:09:25,299 A PIECE OF PLYWOOD, THE GNOME, 191 00:09:25,333 --> 00:09:26,800 A VERY THIN BLANKET, NO FOOD, 192 00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:30,471 AND MY NEW FRIEND THE CROW. 193 00:09:30,504 --> 00:09:32,140 [CAW CAW] 194 00:09:32,473 --> 00:09:33,841 [CAWING] HI, NEIGHBOR! 195 00:09:33,874 --> 00:09:36,377 CAW! CAW-- 196 00:09:42,783 --> 00:09:46,487 NOT EXACTLY THE HOUSEWARMING GIFT I'D HOPED FOR. 197 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:49,022 BUT YOU CAN'T PICK YOUR NEIGHBORS. 198 00:09:50,057 --> 00:09:53,093 TOMMY, MAKE ME A SANDWICH. 199 00:09:53,127 --> 00:09:54,662 YOU HAVE A SANDWICH RIGHT THERE. 200 00:09:54,695 --> 00:09:57,931 I KNOW, BUT MARY CUT IT IN HALF, AND NOT DIAGONALLY, 201 00:09:57,965 --> 00:10:01,034 AND THAT HURTS MY FOOT. 202 00:10:02,836 --> 00:10:04,738 WELL, YOU CAN CHALK IT UP TO ME BEING A TEENAGER, 203 00:10:04,772 --> 00:10:07,641 BUT I JUST DON'T CARE. 204 00:10:07,675 --> 00:10:11,712 MARY WON'T BE BACK FROM THE COLORING-BOOK STORE FOR HALF AN HOUR. 205 00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:13,581 YOU KNOW, THIS DAY HAS BEEN HELL. 206 00:10:13,614 --> 00:10:15,616 I THINK I MET ONE NICE GUY ALL DAY. 207 00:10:15,649 --> 00:10:17,151 HOW MANY BARS DID HE BUY? 208 00:10:17,185 --> 00:10:21,722 OH, NONE, BUT HE SOLD ME THIS NICE SET OF ENCYCLOPEDIAS. 209 00:10:21,755 --> 00:10:23,457 OH, TOMMY? 210 00:10:24,192 --> 00:10:25,326 TOMMY, IT'S AN EMERGENCY. 211 00:10:25,359 --> 00:10:27,528 I NEED THE REMOTE. 212 00:10:28,696 --> 00:10:31,299 SALLY! SALLY! 213 00:10:31,332 --> 00:10:34,535 OHH, OHH, OHH! 214 00:10:34,568 --> 00:10:35,869 WHAT? 215 00:10:35,903 --> 00:10:37,371 I CAN'T REACH THE REMOTE. 216 00:10:37,405 --> 00:10:38,138 IT'S RIGHT THERE. 217 00:10:38,172 --> 00:10:39,039 I CAN'T GET TO IT. 218 00:10:39,072 --> 00:10:40,140 SO? 219 00:10:40,174 --> 00:10:41,475 OH, LIEUTENANT. 220 00:10:41,509 --> 00:10:43,577 DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO FEEL HELPLESS? 221 00:10:43,611 --> 00:10:45,746 TO BE ROBBED OF YOUR FREEDOM BY AN INJURY? 222 00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:47,114 TO BE A BURDEN ON YOUR FAMILY? 223 00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:49,983 OH! GOD, HOW YOU MUST HATE ME. 224 00:10:51,685 --> 00:10:55,489 I'M EXPERIENCING THE STRANGEST SENSATION. 225 00:10:55,523 --> 00:10:59,126 I FEEL BAD THAT YOU FEEL BAD. 226 00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:02,396 EVEN THOUGH I KNOW IT WILL BE ANNOYING, I CAN'T SEEM TO FIGHT IT. 227 00:11:02,430 --> 00:11:05,466 DICK, CAN I GET YOU ANYTHING? 228 00:11:05,499 --> 00:11:07,535 MAKE ME A SANDWICH, AND CUT IT DIAGONALLY. 229 00:11:07,568 --> 00:11:09,603 OK. 230 00:11:10,338 --> 00:11:12,473 OH! YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE! 231 00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:24,151 MY FOOT! IT'S BETTER! 232 00:11:25,453 --> 00:11:27,988 NOOO! 233 00:11:36,330 --> 00:11:38,566 GO ON, DOCTOR. GIVE IT TO ME STRAIGHT. 234 00:11:38,599 --> 00:11:40,768 THE ANKLE LOOKS GREAT. 235 00:11:40,801 --> 00:11:42,870 ARE YOU SURE? 236 00:11:42,903 --> 00:11:44,972 YES. YOU'RE ALL BETTER. 237 00:11:48,075 --> 00:11:49,877 DON'T YOU THINK YOU SHOULD BREAK IT AND SET IT AGAIN, 238 00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:52,446 JUST TO MAKE SURE IT HEALS PROPERLY? 239 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:53,146 NO. 240 00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:54,982 DOCTOR, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. 241 00:11:55,015 --> 00:11:56,484 THE MOMENT I SPRAINED THAT FOOT, 242 00:11:56,517 --> 00:12:00,354 MY LIFE WENT FROM VCR TO VCR-PLUS! 243 00:12:00,388 --> 00:12:02,356 YOU'VE GOT TO HELP ME! 244 00:12:02,390 --> 00:12:06,294 DICK, THE ANKLE IS HEALED. 245 00:12:06,327 --> 00:12:10,364 I WON'T BE TREATED THIS WAY BY YOUR HEARTLESS HMO. 246 00:12:10,398 --> 00:12:12,566 I DEMAND CONTROL OF MY TREATMENT OPTIONS. 247 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:14,702 BECAUSE IT'S NOT THE LENGTH OF OUR TIME HERE THAT MATTERS, 248 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:17,237 IT'S THE QUALITY OF OUR LIVES! 249 00:12:17,271 --> 00:12:19,106 AND IF YOU'RE NOT QUALIFIED TO BREAK MY FOOT, 250 00:12:19,139 --> 00:12:22,443 THEN, BY GOD, I'LL FIND A DOCTOR WHO WILL! 251 00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:27,715 SO YOU'RE TELLING ME 252 00:12:27,748 --> 00:12:31,118 THAT IN THIS COLORFUL MONOCHROME WRAPPER IS A BAR OF CHOCOLATE? 253 00:12:31,151 --> 00:12:34,522 THAT'S RIGHT. DELICIOUS CHOCOLATE. 254 00:12:34,555 --> 00:12:37,291 NOW, HOW FAR WOULD YOU WALK FOR A BAR OF CHOCOLATE? 255 00:12:37,325 --> 00:12:38,225 TO GET A BAR OF CHOCOLATE, 256 00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:42,062 OR AT THE REQUEST OF A BAR OF CHOCOLATE? 257 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:43,063 TO GET ONE. 258 00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:45,065 OH, 53 MILES. 259 00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:48,402 WELL, NOW YOU CAN HAVE CHOCOLATE IN YOUR OWN HOME. 260 00:12:48,436 --> 00:12:51,672 IN MY OWN HOME? 261 00:12:51,705 --> 00:12:54,508 THAT'S RIGHT. NOW, HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY FOR THAT? 262 00:12:54,542 --> 00:12:57,811 FOR MY OWN HOME OR FOR A BAR OF CHOCOLATE? 263 00:12:57,845 --> 00:12:59,313 FOR A BAR OF CHOCOLATE. 264 00:12:59,347 --> 00:13:00,180 AH. 265 00:13:00,914 --> 00:13:02,950 WELL, WE TRIED. 266 00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:05,953 OW! 267 00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:08,522 EXCUSE ME. MY FRIEND HURT HIS LEG. 268 00:13:08,556 --> 00:13:10,891 CAN YOU HELP US OUT AND BUY A CHOCOLATE BAR? 269 00:13:15,429 --> 00:13:18,599 OH, NINA, I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW GOOD IT IS 270 00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:22,169 TO BE AROUND PEOPLE WHO BRUSH THEIR OWN TEETH. 271 00:13:23,471 --> 00:13:25,906 YOU'RE NOT BRUSHING HIS TEETH? 272 00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:30,010 DO I HAVE ANY MESSAGES? 273 00:13:30,043 --> 00:13:31,445 1:00, DR. SOLOMON CALLED. 274 00:13:31,479 --> 00:13:32,813 WANTS TO KNOW WHERE YOU ARE. 275 00:13:32,846 --> 00:13:34,114 OH, GOD. 276 00:13:34,147 --> 00:13:36,617 1:05, DR. SOLOMON CALLED AGAIN. 277 00:13:36,650 --> 00:13:38,118 HIS FOOT FEELS HOT, 278 00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,954 DOESN'T KNOW IF THAT'S A GOOD THING OR A BAD THING. 279 00:13:40,988 --> 00:13:43,724 1:12, DR. SOLOMON CALLED. HE'S HUNGRY. 280 00:13:43,757 --> 00:13:46,827 CAN YOU COME MAKE HIM A PERSONAL PAN PIZZA? 281 00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:48,962 1:17, DR. SOLOMON CALLED. 282 00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:49,897 WANTS TO KNOW IF YOU'VE FORGOTTEN 283 00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:53,000 THAT YOU WERE THE ONE WHO HURT HIS FOOT. 284 00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:55,536 [TELEPHONE RINGS] 285 00:13:57,838 --> 00:13:59,840 [RING] 286 00:14:01,775 --> 00:14:03,611 [IMITATING OLD WOMAN] HELLO? 287 00:14:05,045 --> 00:14:07,815 NO. YOU HAVE THE WRONG NUMBER. 288 00:14:08,682 --> 00:14:10,651 OH, YOUR FOOT HURTS. 289 00:14:11,519 --> 00:14:15,456 HAVE YOU TRIED HITTING IT WITH A HAMMER? 290 00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:24,565 I'VE COLD-CALLED. I'VE DIRECT-MAILED. 291 00:14:24,598 --> 00:14:28,301 I CAN'T AFFORD A PAY-PER-VIEW SPECIAL. NOTHING WORKS. 292 00:14:28,335 --> 00:14:29,603 IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM, BUDDY. 293 00:14:29,637 --> 00:14:34,307 JUST HELP OUT AN INCREDIBLY SCREWED KID AND BUY A CHOCOLATE BAR. 294 00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:36,977 IF I BOUGHT EVERY STUPID THING THAT CAME TO MY DOOR-- 295 00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:39,613 TOMMY, FORGET IT. THE GUY'S NOT BUYING ANYTHING. 296 00:14:39,647 --> 00:14:40,814 I'D BE LIVING UP TO MY PLEDGE 297 00:14:40,848 --> 00:14:43,917 TO HELP EVERY KID WHO CAME TO MY DOOR. 298 00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:48,556 CASH OR CHECK? 299 00:14:48,589 --> 00:14:51,224 HOW ABOUT BOTH? 300 00:14:51,258 --> 00:14:54,294 OH, COME ON! THAT IS JUST SO CHEAP! 301 00:14:54,327 --> 00:14:55,863 GAAH! 302 00:14:59,467 --> 00:15:02,436 I--I REALLY WANT SOME CANDY! 303 00:15:03,136 --> 00:15:07,641 [RADIO PLAYS MARVIN GAYE "SEXUAL HEALING"] 304 00:15:12,012 --> 00:15:13,113 WHAT IS THAT? 305 00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:15,449 93.9. THE WAVE. 306 00:15:15,483 --> 00:15:18,719 THE BEST OF THE SEVENTIES, EIGHTIES, AND TODAY. 307 00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:21,388 I KNOW WHAT IT IS, BUT WHERE IS IT COMING FROM? 308 00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:24,892 FROM MY NEW TREE ENTERTAINMENT SYSTEM. 309 00:15:24,925 --> 00:15:26,226 OH, LOOK! 310 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:30,430 THE SQUIRRELS ARE GETTING IT ON TO MARVIN GAYE. 311 00:15:31,499 --> 00:15:32,600 SO IT'S NICE UP THERE? 312 00:15:32,633 --> 00:15:35,135 ONLY THE BEST ROOM IN THE HOUSE. 313 00:15:35,168 --> 00:15:36,003 SEE YA LATER, DICK. 314 00:15:36,036 --> 00:15:38,939 BUT--BUT--WH-WH-WHAT-- 315 00:15:38,972 --> 00:15:39,873 OH, SALLY. 316 00:15:39,907 --> 00:15:43,310 THANK GOD YOU'RE HERE. 317 00:15:43,343 --> 00:15:46,146 YOU KNOW HOW I HATE ASKING FOR YOUR HELP, 318 00:15:46,179 --> 00:15:51,051 BUT COULD YOU JUST PLEASE DO ME THIS ONE LITTLE FAVOR? 319 00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:52,319 WHAT? 320 00:15:52,352 --> 00:15:54,321 I WANT TO SEE HARRY'S COOL TREE HOUSE. 321 00:15:54,354 --> 00:15:55,155 CARRY ME? 322 00:15:55,188 --> 00:15:56,524 NO WAY. 323 00:15:56,557 --> 00:15:58,492 OH, PLEASE, SALLY. 324 00:15:58,526 --> 00:16:00,293 I HAVE SO LITTLE JOY IN MY LIFE. 325 00:16:00,327 --> 00:16:01,194 NO. 326 00:16:01,228 --> 00:16:03,230 LOOK, SALLY, I ASK YOU FOR SO LITTLE. 327 00:16:03,263 --> 00:16:04,698 COULDN'T YOU JUST ONCE-- 328 00:16:04,732 --> 00:16:06,466 NO! 329 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:10,170 YOU'RE RIGHT. 330 00:16:10,203 --> 00:16:11,505 WHAT GOOD IS A TREE HOUSE VISIT 331 00:16:11,539 --> 00:16:14,307 WHEN DEATH IS ONLY MOMENTS AWAY? 332 00:16:14,341 --> 00:16:15,509 WHAT? 333 00:16:15,543 --> 00:16:17,444 TONIGHT'S MEAL MAY BE MY LAST. 334 00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:20,347 AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. 335 00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:22,115 MEXICAN NIGHT! 336 00:16:26,286 --> 00:16:28,388 I THINK I HATE YOU, DICK. 337 00:16:29,557 --> 00:16:32,125 TOMMY, HARRY, WE GOTTA GO BACK TO THE STORE! 338 00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:33,393 IT'S MEXICAN NIGHT! 339 00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:34,728 OH, GREAT. 340 00:16:34,762 --> 00:16:36,730 IT'S SO WEIRD, DICK. 341 00:16:36,764 --> 00:16:39,800 I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S WHAT YOU'RE SAYING 342 00:16:39,833 --> 00:16:41,935 OR HOW YOU'RE SAYING IT, 343 00:16:41,969 --> 00:16:45,539 BUT, UM, ALL THAT STUFF THAT USED TO MAKE ME WANT TO HELP YOU, 344 00:16:45,573 --> 00:16:48,441 WELL, NOW IT'S JUST PISSING ME OFF! 345 00:16:49,843 --> 00:16:50,410 OH, AND, SALLY. 346 00:16:50,443 --> 00:16:51,612 WHAT?! 347 00:16:51,645 --> 00:16:54,882 CORN TORTILLAS, NOT FLOUR. 348 00:16:54,915 --> 00:16:56,917 Sí, SEÑOR. 349 00:17:07,260 --> 00:17:08,962 NO WAY! 350 00:17:08,996 --> 00:17:11,298 YOU GUYS, YOU GOTTA SEE THIS. 351 00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:21,008 Sally: HOH! I SHOULD'VE KNOWN! 352 00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:21,775 Mary: WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? 353 00:17:21,809 --> 00:17:23,744 SHH! 354 00:17:26,279 --> 00:17:28,716 THAT BASTARD! 355 00:17:28,749 --> 00:17:30,050 THERE GOES MEXICAN NIGHT. 356 00:17:30,083 --> 00:17:32,552 OH, IT'S MEXICAN NIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 357 00:17:32,586 --> 00:17:34,822 MEXICAN PRISON NIGHT. 358 00:17:34,855 --> 00:17:35,956 I SAY WE STICK A BUCKET ON HIS HEAD 359 00:17:35,989 --> 00:17:37,625 AND WHACK HIM WITH A BAT, LIKE A PIÑATA, 360 00:17:37,658 --> 00:17:39,292 AND WE DON'T STOP TILL CANDY COMES OUT. 361 00:17:39,326 --> 00:17:40,594 TOMMY, HARRY, LET'S GO. 362 00:17:40,628 --> 00:17:42,996 WAIT A MINUTE, SALLY! WHAT ABOUT ME? 363 00:17:43,030 --> 00:17:45,532 HE'S TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF ME WORSE THAN ANY OF YOU. 364 00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:47,868 HE MADE ME CUT UP HIS FOOD AND FEED IT TO HIM. 365 00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:51,204 HE MADE ME SING TO HIS FOOT. 366 00:17:51,238 --> 00:17:53,440 HE MADE ME TAKE HIS TEMPERATURE. 367 00:17:53,907 --> 00:17:55,776 THE HARD WAY. 368 00:17:55,809 --> 00:17:57,410 EEW. 369 00:17:57,444 --> 00:18:00,714 BESIDES, I DON'T THINK YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO GET EVEN. 370 00:18:00,748 --> 00:18:03,951 I HAVE A METAL BUCKET AND 3 SOFTBALL BATS. 371 00:18:03,984 --> 00:18:05,919 THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD START. 372 00:18:33,180 --> 00:18:35,082 OH. OH, HI. 373 00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:38,952 THE LADDER APPEARS TO BE DISCONNECTED. 374 00:18:40,688 --> 00:18:43,456 FUNNY HOW THAT HAPPENED, EH? 375 00:18:43,490 --> 00:18:45,659 THAT MUST BE PAINFUL UP THERE ON THAT LADDER 376 00:18:45,693 --> 00:18:48,395 WITH THAT TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE SPRAIN. 377 00:18:48,428 --> 00:18:52,632 UH, OH, YEAH. IT, UH, HURTS A LOT. 378 00:18:52,666 --> 00:18:54,334 HEY, DICK, HOW'D YOU GET UP THERE? 379 00:18:54,367 --> 00:18:57,570 WELL, YOU KNOW HOW IT IS. 380 00:18:58,438 --> 00:18:59,673 NO. TELL US. 381 00:18:59,707 --> 00:19:01,875 COULD ONE OF YOU JUST GRAB THE END OF THE LADDER 382 00:19:01,909 --> 00:19:03,811 AND PULL IT IN? 383 00:19:03,844 --> 00:19:06,714 Mary: GEE, I DON'T KNOW. IT'S AWFULLY FAR. 384 00:19:06,747 --> 00:19:09,082 MY ARM HURTS. MY NECK'S SORE. MINE, TOO. 385 00:19:09,116 --> 00:19:10,483 WHY DON'T YOU LET ME DOWN, 386 00:19:10,517 --> 00:19:12,720 AND I'LL HAVE A LOOK AT THEM? 387 00:19:12,753 --> 00:19:14,922 ADMIT IT, DICK. YOU'RE A LIAR. 388 00:19:14,955 --> 00:19:16,924 Sally: YOU MANIPULATED US. YOU TORTURED US. 389 00:19:16,957 --> 00:19:19,492 IT JUST HAPPENED. IT'S NOBODY'S FAULT. 390 00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:22,162 OK, OK. IT'S MY FAULT. 391 00:19:22,195 --> 00:19:26,166 YOUR SERVITUDE JUST FELT SO GOOD. SO APPROPRIATE. 392 00:19:26,199 --> 00:19:27,534 OH! 393 00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:30,270 I'M SORRY. 394 00:19:30,303 --> 00:19:31,104 Mary: THAT'S BETTER. 395 00:19:31,138 --> 00:19:32,906 AAH! 396 00:19:34,775 --> 00:19:36,910 OH, NOW, THAT'S GOTTA HURT. 397 00:19:40,613 --> 00:19:42,750 NOT AS MUCH AS THAT. 398 00:19:46,553 --> 00:19:49,222 ALL RIGHT. EVERYBODY LINE UP INTO A CIRCLE. 399 00:19:52,359 --> 00:19:53,393 SOLOMON. 400 00:19:53,426 --> 00:19:55,395 SORRY I'M LATE, COACH. 401 00:19:55,428 --> 00:19:58,866 HEY, ANYBODY WHO CAN SELL 15 BOXES OF CHOCOLATE IN MY CLASS 402 00:19:58,899 --> 00:20:00,467 CAN BE A LITTLE TARDY. 403 00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:02,102 WHAT'S YOUR SECRET, CHAMP? 404 00:20:02,135 --> 00:20:06,606 UH, YOU KNOW, I JUST KEPT THINKING ABOUT SENDING THE BAND TO WASHINGTON. 405 00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:09,009 YEAH. THEY'RE GOING TO OWE YOU SOME REAL THANKS 406 00:20:09,042 --> 00:20:11,078 WHEN THEY GET BACK NEXT WEEK. 407 00:20:11,111 --> 00:20:13,646 WHAT, THEY'RE COMING BACK? 408 00:20:15,515 --> 00:20:17,384 WELL, YEAH. 409 00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:18,485 ALL RIGHT, 410 00:20:18,518 --> 00:20:20,087 WHICH ONE OF YOU TOOLS SOLD ENOUGH CHOCOLATE 411 00:20:20,120 --> 00:20:22,222 TO BUY THEM A RETURN TICKET? 412 00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:25,826 HEY, YOU LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU. COME HERE. 413 00:20:28,862 --> 00:20:31,264 GUILT IS LIKE A BELLYBUTTON 414 00:20:31,298 --> 00:20:34,567 THAT DOESN'T EVEN COLLECT LINT. 415 00:20:34,601 --> 00:20:39,372 IT'S A WASTED EMOTION THAT JUST NAGS AND NAGS AND NAGS AND NAGS-- 416 00:20:39,406 --> 00:20:41,641 UNTIL DICK FALLS OUT OF THE TREE. 417 00:20:41,674 --> 00:20:46,880 OHH... OHH... OHH... 418 00:20:46,914 --> 00:20:50,918 MAYBE GUILT IS SOME KIND OF ANCIENT GUIDANCE SYSTEM, 419 00:20:50,951 --> 00:20:54,321 A STEALTH EMOTION DESIGNED TO MAKE PEOPLE HELP EACH OTHER OUT 420 00:20:54,354 --> 00:20:55,889 EVEN IF THEY DON'T EVEN WANT TO. 421 00:20:55,923 --> 00:20:57,324 WELL, IF I COULD JUST BREAK THAT CODE, 422 00:20:57,357 --> 00:21:00,660 I COULD GET YOU ALL TO SERVE ME. 423 00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:02,329 YOU DON'T NEED GUILT TO GET ANYONE TO SERVE YOU. 424 00:21:02,362 --> 00:21:04,164 WE PROVED THAT WHEN WE WERE SELLING CANDY. 425 00:21:04,197 --> 00:21:07,868 ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS REMIND PEOPLE THEY LIKE SEX. 426 00:21:07,901 --> 00:21:13,340 OH, WOULDN'T IT BE SCARY IF SEX AND GUILT WERE CONNECTED? 427 00:21:18,545 --> 00:21:20,147 SEX AND GUILT CONNECTED. 428 00:21:20,180 --> 00:21:21,281 HARRY, YOU'RE AN IDIOT. 429 00:21:21,314 --> 00:21:23,650 I KNOW. I KNOW. 430 00:21:27,354 --> 00:21:28,788 DICK, I'VE BEEN WATCHING TV, 431 00:21:28,822 --> 00:21:31,158 AND I THINK YOU CAN WALK WITHOUT THESE CRUTCHES. 432 00:21:31,191 --> 00:21:31,892 NO, I CAN'T. 433 00:21:31,925 --> 00:21:34,661 THIS MAN SAYS HE CANNOT WALK. 434 00:21:34,694 --> 00:21:36,463 BUT I SAY THAT HE CAN. 435 00:21:36,496 --> 00:21:39,266 I SAY FEEL THE SPIRIT OF DICK SOLOMON. 436 00:21:39,299 --> 00:21:40,167 STAND UP AND WALK. 437 00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:41,034 MY FOOT IS BROKEN. 438 00:21:41,068 --> 00:21:43,036 OH, FOOT, BROKEN. THOSE ARE JUST WORDS. 439 00:21:43,070 --> 00:21:45,638 NOW REACH INSIDE AND WALK MY BROTHER. WALK! 440 00:21:45,672 --> 00:21:47,707 OH! 441 00:21:51,744 --> 00:21:53,480 STAY IN BED, MY BROTHER. 442 00:21:53,513 --> 00:21:54,781 PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT PERMISSION OF NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE 30805

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