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1
00:00:12,746 --> 00:00:15,447
Will you stop with that
terrible air freshener?
2
00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:17,894
It's not air freshener,
it's disinfectant.
3
00:00:17,918 --> 00:00:19,351
No wonder it
smells like the inside
4
00:00:19,420 --> 00:00:21,120
of an ambulance here.
5
00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:22,432
Put that cigar out, please.
6
00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:23,621
No! I like it.
7
00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:26,357
May I remind you that we
have a guest in the house?
8
00:00:26,426 --> 00:00:29,122
My little daughter Edna is in
the other room with the sniffles.
9
00:00:29,146 --> 00:00:30,745
Cigar smoke doesn't
bother sniffles.
10
00:00:30,815 --> 00:00:32,358
Oscar, please, it's not nice
11
00:00:32,382 --> 00:00:33,894
for a little girl with a cold
12
00:00:33,918 --> 00:00:35,896
to have to breathe
cheap cigar smoke.
13
00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:36,852
Put it out.
14
00:00:36,921 --> 00:00:38,553
No. Give it to me!
15
00:00:45,896 --> 00:00:47,095
You notice that Edna and I
16
00:00:47,164 --> 00:00:48,775
are getting along a
little bit better now?
17
00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:50,532
Yeah, that's terrific. Yeah.
18
00:00:50,601 --> 00:00:53,168
Well, until her mother
comes back from Bermuda,
19
00:00:53,236 --> 00:00:54,403
I think I've found the key.
20
00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:55,637
You know what the secret is
21
00:00:55,706 --> 00:00:57,150
for getting along with
kids today? What?
22
00:00:57,174 --> 00:00:58,573
What the Beatles said.
23
00:00:58,642 --> 00:01:01,960
Let them be. Let them be.
24
00:01:03,064 --> 00:01:04,430
I'm gonna make her some tea.
25
00:01:04,498 --> 00:01:06,309
Let the cigar be... I'm
gonna save it. No, no, no!
26
00:01:06,333 --> 00:01:07,844
Whoa! It's got
disinfectant on it.
27
00:01:07,868 --> 00:01:08,878
I'll smoke it at night.
28
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,080
It'll keep the bugs away.
29
00:01:10,104 --> 00:01:12,049
I'm going to get the
concert tickets, Daddy.
30
00:01:12,073 --> 00:01:13,913
Concert? Hey, classical, huh?
31
00:01:13,974 --> 00:01:15,090
Classical.
32
00:01:15,159 --> 00:01:17,069
She's going to a
Paul Williams concert.
33
00:01:17,093 --> 00:01:18,738
Have you heard him?
He sings, not bad.
34
00:01:18,762 --> 00:01:19,711
It's all in English.
35
00:01:19,780 --> 00:01:21,280
He wrote great songs,
36
00:01:21,348 --> 00:01:22,592
like "We've Only Just Begun,"
37
00:01:22,616 --> 00:01:23,810
"You and Me Against the World"
38
00:01:23,834 --> 00:01:24,977
and "Rainy Days and Mondays."
39
00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:26,680
I know who Paul
Williams is. Oh, all right.
40
00:01:26,704 --> 00:01:28,064
I'll see you in the
morning, Daddy.
41
00:01:29,540 --> 00:01:31,740
You'll see me in the morning?
42
00:01:31,808 --> 00:01:32,874
How's that?
43
00:01:32,943 --> 00:01:34,554
Well, some friends
and I are gonna stand
44
00:01:34,578 --> 00:01:36,422
in line overnight to
make sure we get seats.
45
00:01:36,446 --> 00:01:38,513
Overnight... on the sidewalk?
46
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:39,676
Well, sure, it's fun.
47
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:41,266
No, no, no, I don't
think that's fun.
48
00:01:41,335 --> 00:01:43,569
No. Oh, come on, Daddy.
49
00:01:43,637 --> 00:01:44,820
Don't be silly.
50
00:01:44,889 --> 00:01:46,188
Even if you didn't have a cold,
51
00:01:46,257 --> 00:01:47,968
I wouldn't let you stay
overnight on the sidewalk.
52
00:01:47,992 --> 00:01:49,836
But Daddy... You will not go!
53
00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:51,371
Yes, I will. You will not!
54
00:01:51,395 --> 00:01:52,661
What happened to "let them be,
55
00:01:52,730 --> 00:01:54,329
let them be"? Go to your room!
56
00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:57,999
What happened to "let them be"?
57
00:01:58,068 --> 00:02:00,313
You can't let them
be all the time.
58
00:02:00,337 --> 00:02:01,548
What do the Beatles know?
59
00:02:01,572 --> 00:02:04,706
To be a good parent,
you must be authoritative.
60
00:02:04,775 --> 00:02:06,619
The child must know who's boss.
61
00:02:06,643 --> 00:02:07,942
They respect that.
62
00:02:08,011 --> 00:02:10,223
Edna, don't be mad at me.
63
00:02:10,247 --> 00:02:12,807
Come on, I'll buy
you something...
64
00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:49,183
♪ ♪
65
00:03:19,783 --> 00:03:22,717
♪ ♪
66
00:03:34,698 --> 00:03:37,799
The Odd Couple was filmed
in front of a live audience.
67
00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:43,021
My daughter hates me.
68
00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:45,957
She's only been
here a short time.
69
00:03:46,026 --> 00:03:47,759
Think how I feel about you.
70
00:03:47,827 --> 00:03:50,039
Don't try to cheer me up.
71
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,496
This is serious.
72
00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:53,298
I know why she wants to stand
73
00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:54,799
in line all night long.
74
00:03:54,868 --> 00:03:56,663
She's crazy in love
with that Paul Williams.
75
00:03:56,687 --> 00:03:58,519
Better him than Alice Cooper.
76
00:04:01,075 --> 00:04:04,008
A little girl stand...
she'll get pneumon...
77
00:04:04,078 --> 00:04:06,010
Am I wrong? Tell me the truth.
78
00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:08,224
Felix, sit down,
all right, sit down.
79
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:10,427
Will you promise, if
I tell you something,
80
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:11,494
you won't go overboard?
81
00:04:11,518 --> 00:04:12,662
Please promise, all right? Yeah.
82
00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:14,964
Now, don't jump,
please don't jump.
83
00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:16,632
I think I can get you tickets
84
00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:18,000
to Paul William" concert...
you're jumping. Oh, oh, oh!
85
00:04:18,024 --> 00:04:19,469
See, I knew you were
gonna jump... I told you...
86
00:04:19,493 --> 00:04:20,736
that's I didn't
want to tell you.
87
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,860
You'll make me a hero
for life, she'll love me.
88
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,028
How... how can you do that?
89
00:04:24,098 --> 00:04:25,542
About a year ago,
I did an interview
90
00:04:25,566 --> 00:04:26,910
with Paul Williams
about gliding.
91
00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:28,745
Gliding? He does that? Yeah.
92
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:30,179
Yeah, he gets in a
plane with no motor,
93
00:04:30,203 --> 00:04:31,414
a plane with a
motor takes him up,
94
00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:32,499
lets him go and then he glides.
95
00:04:32,523 --> 00:04:34,100
Goes up without a motor? Yeah.
96
00:04:34,124 --> 00:04:36,084
Why would a man
do a thing like that?
97
00:04:37,327 --> 00:04:39,887
Why would a man shampoo
a rug three times a week?
98
00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:43,849
Because you... Never
mind, never mind.
99
00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:45,283
If you do this for me, I'll...
100
00:04:45,352 --> 00:04:46,529
anything, anything.
101
00:04:46,553 --> 00:04:48,632
I'll cook anything
you want for a month.
102
00:04:48,656 --> 00:04:50,489
Creamed chipped
beef on a doughnut?
103
00:04:52,909 --> 00:04:54,829
Yeah. With raisins in it?
104
00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:57,323
All right, now, now,
remember please,
105
00:04:57,347 --> 00:04:58,513
I said it's a small chance.
106
00:04:58,582 --> 00:05:00,302
He's a big singing
star, and I'm not sure...
107
00:05:00,350 --> 00:05:02,267
Edna, Edna, we've got tickets
108
00:05:02,336 --> 00:05:03,479
to the Paul Williams concert.
109
00:05:03,503 --> 00:05:05,782
Yippee!
110
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:09,006
♪ And oh, we
seldom get our due ♪
111
00:05:09,075 --> 00:05:11,710
♪ When each day is through ♪
112
00:05:11,778 --> 00:05:14,579
♪ I'll bring my
tired body home ♪
113
00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:18,916
♪ You and me
against the world. ♪
114
00:05:23,557 --> 00:05:26,257
There, there's the stamp
I wanted to show you.
115
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,625
It's from Brazil.
116
00:05:27,694 --> 00:05:29,339
Look, sweetie... Did Uncle
Oscar say when he'd be home?
117
00:05:29,363 --> 00:05:30,940
No, sweetheart. Well,
when he called before,
118
00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:32,764
why didn't you ask him
if he had the tickets?
119
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,113
Because he couldn't talk.
120
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:35,945
He'd been gliding
with Paul Williams,
121
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,847
and he was in no
condition for a conversation.
122
00:05:37,871 --> 00:05:38,903
Why not?
123
00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:40,405
He was crying.
124
00:05:40,474 --> 00:05:41,873
Look, sweetie, look.
125
00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:42,857
He's home!
126
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:45,560
Oh, Mr. Unger?
127
00:05:45,629 --> 00:05:46,861
Yeah. I'm Paul Williams.
128
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:49,530
Well, well.
129
00:05:52,386 --> 00:05:54,218
Oscar, how was the gliding?
130
00:05:54,287 --> 00:05:56,065
Uh, we ran into
a little turbulence.
131
00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:57,889
Look out for the tree! Oscar!
132
00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:01,426
Oscar, you're...
you're home now.
133
00:06:01,495 --> 00:06:03,595
You're all right,
you're all right.
134
00:06:03,663 --> 00:06:06,398
I prayed, Felix, and my
prayers were answered.
135
00:06:06,466 --> 00:06:08,666
Felix, I promised God
136
00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:11,002
tomorrow we'd move
down to the ground floor.
137
00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:16,886
Mr. Williams, I... Yes?
138
00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:19,578
I want you to meet
my daughter Edna.
139
00:06:19,646 --> 00:06:20,679
She's dying to meet you.
140
00:06:20,747 --> 00:06:21,662
How do you do?
141
00:06:21,749 --> 00:06:24,309
Edna?
142
00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:27,301
See?
143
00:06:27,370 --> 00:06:28,970
I think she's in awe of you.
144
00:06:29,039 --> 00:06:30,319
It's my curse.
145
00:06:32,676 --> 00:06:34,609
Well, come in, would
you like a piece of fruit?
146
00:06:34,678 --> 00:06:36,156
No, thank you,
I'm really in a hurry.
147
00:06:36,180 --> 00:06:37,990
I wanted to... to
bring Oscar home
148
00:06:38,014 --> 00:06:39,826
and give you the tickets
for the concert. Oh.
149
00:06:39,850 --> 00:06:43,151
Oh, thank you, how very nice.
150
00:06:43,237 --> 00:06:46,221
Edna, it was nice
talking to you.
151
00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:50,019
Wouldn't you like to
have dinner with us?
152
00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,253
How long are you
gonna be in town?
153
00:06:51,277 --> 00:06:52,822
You look as if you
could enjoy a good meal.
154
00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:55,024
Well, thank you, but,
uh, after the show tonight,
155
00:06:55,048 --> 00:06:57,159
I go to Albany for the
weekend. Albany, huh?
156
00:06:57,183 --> 00:06:58,695
A little club up
there that I play
157
00:06:58,719 --> 00:07:00,897
where I got my start,
you know, so I go back.
158
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:03,588
Isn't that nice...
Loyalty, I like that.
159
00:07:03,657 --> 00:07:06,217
Would you like to
go instead of me?
160
00:07:07,193 --> 00:07:08,270
Just kidding.
161
00:07:08,294 --> 00:07:09,405
Thank you.
162
00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:11,062
Thank you.
163
00:07:14,835 --> 00:07:16,801
Oh, Daddy!
164
00:07:18,222 --> 00:07:20,083
Well, the old man's not
such a party pooper, huh?
165
00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:22,373
Oh...
166
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,053
You feel warm to
me. No, I feel great.
167
00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:25,788
No, no, you've got a
bit of fever, haven't you?
168
00:07:25,812 --> 00:07:26,894
No, really, I'm fine.
169
00:07:26,980 --> 00:07:28,357
Come on, we'll take
your temperature.
170
00:07:28,381 --> 00:07:31,649
No, Daddy, really, I'm
fine. Come on, come on!
171
00:07:31,718 --> 00:07:32,951
How do you feel?
172
00:07:33,019 --> 00:07:34,953
Oh, I'm great now.
173
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:37,254
"Yea, though I walk
through the valley
174
00:07:37,323 --> 00:07:39,190
of the shadow of death..."
175
00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:51,002
Mm-mm.
176
00:07:51,070 --> 00:07:52,815
Take it again. Mm-mm-mm, mm-mm.
177
00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:54,755
I'm sorry, honey,
I've taken it four times.
178
00:07:54,842 --> 00:07:55,874
It still 102.
179
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:57,787
I've got to go to the concert.
180
00:07:57,811 --> 00:07:59,661
You can't go,
darling, I'm sorry.
181
00:07:59,730 --> 00:08:01,495
You're such a bummer!
182
00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:03,698
Is that a nice way
to talk to your father?
183
00:08:03,767 --> 00:08:05,600
Come on, cover up.
184
00:08:05,668 --> 00:08:06,968
What's a bummer?
185
00:08:07,037 --> 00:08:09,499
A person who never
likes to have any fun.
186
00:08:09,523 --> 00:08:11,155
Me, not like to have fun?
187
00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:13,741
Me? I'm the king of fun!
188
00:08:14,862 --> 00:08:15,922
Come on now.
189
00:08:15,946 --> 00:08:17,845
Sit down here, sit down.
190
00:08:17,914 --> 00:08:20,192
You can put your feet
up because you're sick.
191
00:08:20,216 --> 00:08:22,776
Cover up, and we'll have
our own fun here at home.
192
00:08:22,819 --> 00:08:24,964
We'll have a rock
concert right here.
193
00:08:24,988 --> 00:08:27,989
We'll rock with opera.
194
00:08:28,058 --> 00:08:29,235
La Traviata.
195
00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:31,359
Oh, dynamite.
196
00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:34,028
You know what La
Traviata means in Italian?
197
00:08:34,097 --> 00:08:35,641
It means "the troubled girl",
198
00:08:35,665 --> 00:08:37,309
and that's what you
are because you're sick,
199
00:08:37,333 --> 00:08:38,477
but you're gonna get better.
200
00:08:38,501 --> 00:08:41,269
Now, this girl in the
opera really has trouble
201
00:08:41,337 --> 00:08:43,015
because she has consumption.
202
00:08:43,039 --> 00:08:45,284
And you know why? 'Cause
she didn't keep covered up
203
00:08:45,308 --> 00:08:46,953
when she had a bad cold.
204
00:08:46,977 --> 00:08:49,355
Anyway, she's a
very lovely person,
205
00:08:49,379 --> 00:08:50,990
but she's not quite
the kind of person
206
00:08:51,014 --> 00:08:53,192
I'd like you to know,
because she is a...
207
00:08:53,216 --> 00:08:55,261
member of the demimondaine.
208
00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:58,653
She is a... she's a
lady of the evening.
209
00:08:58,721 --> 00:09:00,538
You mean a hooker, Daddy?
210
00:09:02,659 --> 00:09:04,437
Where do you
learn talk like that?
211
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,127
From your opera stories.
212
00:09:06,196 --> 00:09:08,129
I gotta go to that concert!
213
00:09:08,198 --> 00:09:11,032
I just gotta go to that concert!
214
00:09:12,636 --> 00:09:14,035
Tell me the truth.
215
00:09:14,103 --> 00:09:16,171
Am I a bad parent?
216
00:09:16,239 --> 00:09:17,450
What should I do?
217
00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:19,874
Tell me the rest of
that dirty opera story.
218
00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,490
Well, that was a great game.
219
00:09:24,514 --> 00:09:26,659
We'll be back with the
start of our second game,
220
00:09:26,683 --> 00:09:29,351
Alabama-Navy, right after
this message from our sponsor.
221
00:09:29,419 --> 00:09:31,019
Oscar? Yeah?
222
00:09:31,088 --> 00:09:32,854
Look at this, look at that.
223
00:09:32,922 --> 00:09:34,990
Today, it's 99,
isn't that great?
224
00:09:35,058 --> 00:09:37,158
You see, I was
right not to let her go
225
00:09:37,227 --> 00:09:38,637
to that concert
last night. Terrific.
226
00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,428
Edna, soon you'll be normal!
227
00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:42,617
With you as a father,
she'll never be normal.
228
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:51,272
That's cute, coming
from a nonparent.
229
00:09:51,341 --> 00:09:52,773
Look, I've got to
cover a wedding.
230
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:54,153
Take care of her,
will you? Mm-hmm.
231
00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:55,643
Just see that she's okay.
232
00:09:55,712 --> 00:09:56,845
Don't let her go out.
233
00:09:56,913 --> 00:09:58,124
That's the main thing. Okay.
234
00:09:58,148 --> 00:10:00,381
Honey, I'm leaving now!
235
00:10:00,467 --> 00:10:02,946
This is the bummer
saying good-bye.
236
00:10:02,970 --> 00:10:04,347
You heard what I
told you, huh? Yes.
237
00:10:04,371 --> 00:10:05,371
Okay.
238
00:10:06,656 --> 00:10:08,122
Hello, Irwin... Oscar.
239
00:10:08,191 --> 00:10:10,525
Yeah, I want to make a bet
on the Navy-Alabama game.
240
00:10:10,594 --> 00:10:11,893
Well, I know I lost.
241
00:10:11,961 --> 00:10:14,195
Give me a chance to
get even. I'm good for it.
242
00:10:14,264 --> 00:10:15,497
Now what's the spread?
243
00:10:15,565 --> 00:10:17,710
Three points? All right, give
me Navy and three points.
244
00:10:17,734 --> 00:10:18,867
Yeah, they can't lose!
245
00:10:18,935 --> 00:10:20,201
Okay, bye-bye, Irwin.
246
00:10:21,888 --> 00:10:23,632
Okay, folks, here we go.
247
00:10:23,656 --> 00:10:26,057
Here come the
Midshipmen out on the field.
248
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,693
Wait a minute, there's some
kind of commotion down there.
249
00:10:28,761 --> 00:10:31,262
Uh-oh, it's bad news
for you Navy fans.
250
00:10:31,331 --> 00:10:33,242
The quarterback was
just bitten by the mascot.
251
00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,182
He's out of the game.
252
00:10:37,954 --> 00:10:40,521
For you mascot fans, he's fine.
253
00:10:40,590 --> 00:10:43,758
Yeah? I'd like to see a
goat throw a forward pass!
254
00:10:45,595 --> 00:10:47,862
Hello, Irwin... oh, you're busy!
255
00:10:47,930 --> 00:10:49,631
Now I can't get the bet off.
256
00:10:49,699 --> 00:10:52,367
Come on... oh, I
can't believe I...
257
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:00,575
Edna!
258
00:11:09,219 --> 00:11:10,851
Edna?
259
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,200
I'm home, honey.
260
00:11:13,856 --> 00:11:15,356
Guess who's home.
261
00:11:16,460 --> 00:11:18,192
We're still pals.
262
00:11:18,261 --> 00:11:19,338
How is she?
263
00:11:19,362 --> 00:11:21,529
Well, you know, she...
264
00:11:26,837 --> 00:11:28,470
"I'm leaving.
265
00:11:28,538 --> 00:11:30,550
"I can't take it anymore.
266
00:11:30,574 --> 00:11:33,134
I can't stand being
treated like a child."
267
00:11:33,176 --> 00:11:35,943
Oh, Oscar, we've been
through this 1,000 times.
268
00:11:39,433 --> 00:11:41,132
Turn it over.
269
00:11:42,268 --> 00:11:44,814
"I'm going to follow
Paul Williams.
270
00:11:44,838 --> 00:11:47,171
Good-bye. Edna."
271
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:50,491
I'm sorry, Felix.
272
00:11:50,577 --> 00:11:52,977
Well, say something, will you?
273
00:11:53,046 --> 00:11:54,412
Will you scream,
274
00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:55,847
will you holler,
will you hit me?
275
00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:57,899
Here, pour beer on
me, ketchup, anything.
276
00:11:57,968 --> 00:11:59,745
Don't be silly, I'm
not going to be crazy.
277
00:11:59,769 --> 00:12:00,947
I'm not going to be dumb.
278
00:12:00,971 --> 00:12:02,514
No time for recriminations.
279
00:12:02,538 --> 00:12:05,098
It's a time to... think.
280
00:12:06,742 --> 00:12:08,654
Other parents have
had to live with the pain
281
00:12:08,678 --> 00:12:09,721
of a child running away.
282
00:12:09,745 --> 00:12:11,623
Now I have to
live with that pain.
283
00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:13,547
What am I going to do?
284
00:12:13,616 --> 00:12:15,861
I have to go to Albany...
That's the thing to do...
285
00:12:15,885 --> 00:12:17,565
And you're going
with me. Of course.
286
00:12:17,620 --> 00:12:19,920
Thanks for being so
nice about it, Felix.
287
00:12:19,990 --> 00:12:22,590
But first, I'll pour beer...
288
00:12:22,658 --> 00:12:24,670
I can't do it, I can't do it.
289
00:12:24,694 --> 00:12:26,172
Well, you should
because I deserve it.
290
00:12:26,196 --> 00:12:28,062
I'll do it to myself...
Look at that.
291
00:12:33,686 --> 00:12:37,088
♪ Though we seldom get our due ♪
292
00:12:37,157 --> 00:12:38,889
♪ When each day is through ♪
293
00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:42,710
♪ I'll bring my
tired body home ♪
294
00:12:42,796 --> 00:12:45,629
♪ Look around for you ♪
295
00:12:45,698 --> 00:12:49,466
♪ And me against the world ♪
296
00:12:49,535 --> 00:12:53,637
♪ It feels like you and
me against the world ♪
297
00:12:55,541 --> 00:12:58,976
♪ And for all the
times we cried ♪
298
00:12:59,045 --> 00:13:02,113
♪ I always felt that God ♪
299
00:13:02,182 --> 00:13:04,715
♪ Was on our side ♪
300
00:13:05,786 --> 00:13:10,155
♪ And when one of us has gone ♪
301
00:13:10,223 --> 00:13:13,124
♪ And one is left alone ♪
302
00:13:13,193 --> 00:13:16,161
♪ To carry on ♪
303
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:20,665
♪ Then remembering
will have to do ♪
304
00:13:20,733 --> 00:13:23,034
♪ Our memories alone ♪
305
00:13:23,103 --> 00:13:26,037
♪ Will see us through ♪
306
00:13:26,106 --> 00:13:28,606
♪ Think about the days ♪
307
00:13:28,675 --> 00:13:31,609
♪ Of me and you ♪
308
00:13:31,678 --> 00:13:36,514
♪ You and me
against the world. ♪
309
00:13:48,578 --> 00:13:50,511
Thank you.
310
00:13:50,580 --> 00:13:51,512
Edna? Bless you.
311
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:53,013
I love coming back...
312
00:13:53,083 --> 00:13:54,193
Edna? To you nice people.
313
00:13:54,217 --> 00:13:57,118
It's good to be back
at the Tippietoe Room.
314
00:13:57,187 --> 00:13:58,330
Are you here? I'm here.
315
00:13:58,354 --> 00:13:59,287
Shh!
316
00:13:59,355 --> 00:14:01,789
I'm being as quiet as I can be.
317
00:14:01,857 --> 00:14:04,559
Let me guess... You're
looking for a table.
318
00:14:04,627 --> 00:14:06,094
Rick, can we have a little light
319
00:14:06,162 --> 00:14:07,395
for these elderly gentlemen?
320
00:14:07,464 --> 00:14:09,597
We've got to get
them to a table.
321
00:14:09,665 --> 00:14:11,532
Right in front.
322
00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:13,534
Don't be ashamed.
323
00:14:16,139 --> 00:14:19,656
Buy him a cup of Sanka... on me.
324
00:14:19,726 --> 00:14:22,327
I gotta tell ya, I don't
do "Melancholy Baby"
325
00:14:22,395 --> 00:14:24,262
until the second show.
326
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:28,433
I know these guys.
327
00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:31,869
♪ It's just an
old-fashioned love song ♪
328
00:14:31,938 --> 00:14:35,072
♪ Playing on the radio ♪
329
00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:39,844
♪ And wrapped around the music ♪
330
00:14:39,912 --> 00:14:44,115
♪ Is the sound of someone
promising they'll never go ♪
331
00:14:45,351 --> 00:14:46,584
Edna!
332
00:14:46,652 --> 00:14:48,197
Hey, that's not Edna.
333
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:49,464
I'm sorry.
334
00:14:49,488 --> 00:14:51,067
What's the matter with
you? Will you relax?
335
00:14:51,091 --> 00:14:52,023
We'll look for her after.
336
00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:53,273
♪ We've come to know ♪
337
00:14:56,713 --> 00:14:58,779
♪ You'll swear you've
heard it before ♪
338
00:14:58,848 --> 00:15:01,482
♪ As it slowly
rambles on and on ♪
339
00:15:01,551 --> 00:15:03,417
♪ No need in bringing 'em back ♪
340
00:15:03,486 --> 00:15:06,420
♪ 'Cause they've
never really gone ♪
341
00:15:06,489 --> 00:15:10,524
♪ It's just an
old-fashioned love song ♪
342
00:15:10,593 --> 00:15:14,995
♪ Coming down in
three-part harmony ♪
343
00:15:15,064 --> 00:15:19,933
♪ It's just an
old-fashioned love song ♪
344
00:15:20,002 --> 00:15:24,739
♪ One I'm sure they
wrote for you and me ♪
345
00:15:24,807 --> 00:15:29,243
♪ It's just an
old-fashioned love song ♪
346
00:15:29,311 --> 00:15:33,714
♪ Coming down in
three-part harmony ♪
347
00:15:33,783 --> 00:15:37,885
♪ It's just an
old-fashioned love song ♪
348
00:15:37,971 --> 00:15:41,472
♪ One I'm sure they
wrote for you and me. ♪
349
00:15:45,211 --> 00:15:46,588
Thank you, you've been nice.
350
00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:47,612
Good night.
351
00:15:56,222 --> 00:15:57,505
Look at that waitress.
352
00:15:59,409 --> 00:16:00,708
Wow!
353
00:16:00,777 --> 00:16:02,355
What's the matter
with you? That's Edna.
354
00:16:02,379 --> 00:16:04,078
It is?
355
00:16:07,116 --> 00:16:08,315
Edna?
356
00:16:08,385 --> 00:16:09,550
Daddy!
357
00:16:09,619 --> 00:16:11,753
Oh, Edna.
358
00:16:11,821 --> 00:16:14,589
Oh, my little girl, a waitress!
359
00:16:14,657 --> 00:16:16,391
Look at all that
paint on your...
360
00:16:16,459 --> 00:16:18,492
May I borrow this, please?
361
00:16:18,561 --> 00:16:20,506
Daddy, oh, please
stop making a scene!
362
00:16:20,530 --> 00:16:22,074
I'm not making a scene!
363
00:16:22,098 --> 00:16:23,931
Will you sit down, please?
364
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,866
I want to know what's going on!
365
00:16:25,935 --> 00:16:27,179
Sit down and order something.
366
00:16:27,203 --> 00:16:28,603
I order you to come home!
367
00:16:28,671 --> 00:16:30,591
I'm sorry, we're
all out of that.
368
00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:32,439
I will not have my daughter
369
00:16:32,508 --> 00:16:33,674
be a waitress in a motel!
370
00:16:33,743 --> 00:16:34,987
You're embarrassing me.
371
00:16:35,011 --> 00:16:37,255
Will you please take a
walk, let me talk to her?
372
00:16:37,279 --> 00:16:38,824
Please calm down. Go ahead.
373
00:16:38,848 --> 00:16:39,848
She's underage!
374
00:16:39,882 --> 00:16:41,162
Quiet, will you?
375
00:16:41,951 --> 00:16:43,951
Man.
376
00:16:44,019 --> 00:16:45,096
Sit down.
377
00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:47,988
Here, have a seat, sweetheart.
378
00:16:48,057 --> 00:16:50,469
Honey, I've got
to tell you the truth.
379
00:16:50,493 --> 00:16:52,103
See, I'm kind of
like your father.
380
00:16:52,127 --> 00:16:53,494
I'm surprised.
381
00:16:53,563 --> 00:16:55,391
You always seemed so sensible.
382
00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:57,665
I'm still sensible.
383
00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:59,728
You call running
away like this sensible?
384
00:16:59,752 --> 00:17:01,730
It seems pretty crazy to me...
385
00:17:01,754 --> 00:17:03,816
unless, honey,
you've got some plan.
386
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:06,907
I-I have a plan... to
follow Paul Williams.
387
00:17:06,976 --> 00:17:08,888
Why, you figure maybe
someday you'll get
388
00:17:08,912 --> 00:17:10,589
to marry him or something? No.
389
00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:12,057
Well, do you think or you feel
390
00:17:12,081 --> 00:17:13,125
you're in love with him?
391
00:17:13,149 --> 00:17:14,248
No.
392
00:17:14,317 --> 00:17:15,377
Then, see, I don't understand.
393
00:17:15,401 --> 00:17:16,767
You see, that's just it.
394
00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:18,435
Neither does my father.
395
00:17:18,504 --> 00:17:20,504
But Paul Williams
understands me.
396
00:17:20,573 --> 00:17:21,650
Did you talk to him?
397
00:17:21,674 --> 00:17:22,801
Did he tell you this? No.
398
00:17:22,825 --> 00:17:24,525
I can tell by his songs.
399
00:17:24,594 --> 00:17:26,727
He-He sings the
things that I feel.
400
00:17:27,830 --> 00:17:30,331
Vivian, no mixing.
401
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:31,932
They want you in the kitchen.
402
00:17:32,001 --> 00:17:33,033
I really have to get back
403
00:17:33,102 --> 00:17:34,102
to work now, Uncle Oscar.
404
00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:35,953
Okay.
405
00:17:38,741 --> 00:17:40,875
Well, what did she say?
406
00:17:40,943 --> 00:17:42,442
I don't understand.
407
00:17:42,512 --> 00:17:43,822
You don't understand
her, either?
408
00:17:43,846 --> 00:17:45,212
No, that's what she said.
409
00:17:45,281 --> 00:17:47,214
I don't understand her,
you don't understand her.
410
00:17:47,283 --> 00:17:48,832
Only Paul Williams
understands her.
411
00:17:48,885 --> 00:17:50,896
Only Paul Williams understands.
412
00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:52,898
Where was Paul Williams
when she had the mumps?
413
00:17:52,922 --> 00:17:56,490
Where was Paul Williams
when she had the measles?
414
00:17:56,559 --> 00:17:58,787
You mean, I should
talk to Paul Williams.
415
00:17:58,811 --> 00:18:00,411
I think so, buddy.
416
00:18:06,118 --> 00:18:08,419
I'm sorry, sir,
you can't go back.
417
00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:10,549
I've got to see Paul
Williams. I'm sorry.
418
00:18:10,573 --> 00:18:13,373
I've got to see Paul
Williams or I'll die.
419
00:18:13,442 --> 00:18:15,776
It's always a matter
of life and death
420
00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:18,311
with you groupies.
421
00:18:18,380 --> 00:18:20,113
He's resting backstage.
422
00:18:20,182 --> 00:18:21,222
We're friends of his.
423
00:18:21,250 --> 00:18:23,984
I know, everybody says that.
424
00:18:24,053 --> 00:18:25,898
Can you take him a note, please?
425
00:18:25,922 --> 00:18:28,089
A quarter?
426
00:18:28,157 --> 00:18:30,024
What is this, your allowance?
427
00:18:30,092 --> 00:18:31,302
Oh, very funny.
428
00:18:31,326 --> 00:18:32,704
Here, here, here, will
you take him the note?
429
00:18:32,728 --> 00:18:34,495
Okay, I'll take it.
430
00:18:39,001 --> 00:18:40,579
He's not gonna come out.
431
00:18:40,603 --> 00:18:41,647
They never do.
432
00:18:41,671 --> 00:18:43,148
Too busy with their fast women
433
00:18:43,172 --> 00:18:44,383
and their fancy hair dryers.
434
00:18:44,407 --> 00:18:46,039
Felix, will you relax?
435
00:18:46,108 --> 00:18:47,268
It's only been ten minutes.
436
00:18:47,326 --> 00:18:48,876
This is my daughter!
437
00:18:48,945 --> 00:18:51,561
I know, but sit
down, try to relax.
438
00:18:54,501 --> 00:18:56,567
What are you doing?
439
00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:58,514
You told me to sit down.
440
00:18:58,538 --> 00:19:01,071
Why don't you sit over there?
441
00:19:01,141 --> 00:19:04,242
I'd be lonely over there.
442
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:07,011
This is a chair for two.
443
00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:11,393
I'm very grateful that
you came along with me.
444
00:19:11,417 --> 00:19:13,695
Oh... I don't have to tell you
445
00:19:13,719 --> 00:19:15,231
I was getting a
little bit hysterical.
446
00:19:15,255 --> 00:19:16,820
Yeah, it was hard not to notice,
447
00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:18,689
the way you kept
trying to grab the wheel,
448
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:19,823
blow the horn...
449
00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:21,337
And the bus
driver yelling at me,
450
00:19:21,361 --> 00:19:23,294
"Sit down, sit down!"
451
00:19:27,199 --> 00:19:28,399
Felix, Oscar?
452
00:19:32,221 --> 00:19:33,520
I told you he'd come.
453
00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:34,721
I thought that was you.
454
00:19:34,790 --> 00:19:35,923
I can't believe you came.
455
00:19:35,992 --> 00:19:38,826
I mean, nobody comes to Albany.
456
00:19:38,894 --> 00:19:40,022
You saw my note?
457
00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:41,345
Oh, it's beautiful.
458
00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:43,308
You... you must really
love your daughter. Mm.
459
00:19:43,332 --> 00:19:44,932
Will you talk to her?
460
00:19:45,001 --> 00:19:46,767
Felix, I can't talk to her.
461
00:19:46,836 --> 00:19:48,102
That would be lecturing.
462
00:19:48,171 --> 00:19:49,937
I'm a... a singer, not a talker.
463
00:19:50,006 --> 00:19:52,106
Oh, big deal,
464
00:19:52,175 --> 00:19:53,785
Mr. Golden Record,
teenage idol...
465
00:19:53,809 --> 00:19:55,054
Now, that's not fair, Felix.
466
00:19:55,078 --> 00:19:56,822
I don't have to be
fair, I'm a crazy person.
467
00:19:56,846 --> 00:19:58,846
Felix... relax.
468
00:19:58,915 --> 00:20:01,481
Why don't you give me just a
minute alone with her inside?
469
00:20:01,550 --> 00:20:03,017
I-I might be able to help.
470
00:20:03,085 --> 00:20:04,551
Really, trust me.
471
00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:06,364
You're not a crazy
person, either.
472
00:20:06,388 --> 00:20:07,420
You're a nice man.
473
00:20:08,524 --> 00:20:09,801
I'm gonna drag her home.
474
00:20:09,825 --> 00:20:11,136
That's what I'm... Come on now.
475
00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:12,637
Give him a shot, all right?
476
00:20:12,661 --> 00:20:15,221
I'm going to get a cigar.
477
00:20:24,007 --> 00:20:26,507
Don't ever have children.
478
00:20:31,864 --> 00:20:34,365
Edna, sit down there, would you?
479
00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:36,067
I just finished a new song.
480
00:20:36,135 --> 00:20:38,436
I'd kind of like to
get your opinion of it.
481
00:20:38,504 --> 00:20:40,715
Mine? Yeah, sit down, sit down.
482
00:20:40,739 --> 00:20:42,106
A fellow gave me a note.
483
00:20:42,175 --> 00:20:44,442
I read it; it... kind
of inspired me.
484
00:20:44,510 --> 00:20:46,577
I... it said what I
think I'd want to say
485
00:20:46,645 --> 00:20:47,911
to my daughter, you know,
486
00:20:47,980 --> 00:20:49,580
if I ever have one, you know?
487
00:20:49,648 --> 00:20:50,680
Listen.
488
00:20:51,884 --> 00:20:54,218
♪ And even though
I'm not around ♪
489
00:20:54,287 --> 00:20:57,187
♪ To pick you up the
times you're down ♪
490
00:20:57,257 --> 00:21:01,492
♪ You know I think about
you each and every day ♪
491
00:21:01,561 --> 00:21:04,094
♪ And though I
feel a love for you ♪
492
00:21:04,163 --> 00:21:07,965
♪ That's always
growing, always new ♪
493
00:21:08,033 --> 00:21:12,319
♪ The things I'm quick to feel
I'm sometimes slow to say ♪
494
00:21:13,422 --> 00:21:16,523
♪ So I lay awake and worry ♪
495
00:21:16,592 --> 00:21:19,493
♪ Are you hungry,
are you warm? ♪
496
00:21:19,561 --> 00:21:24,831
♪ Why, there's nothing in
this world too good for you ♪
497
00:21:24,900 --> 00:21:28,034
♪ And then I turn
around and make a list ♪
498
00:21:28,103 --> 00:21:30,688
♪ Of things that
you can't have ♪
499
00:21:32,141 --> 00:21:36,443
♪ I only hope my good
intentions still show through ♪
500
00:21:36,511 --> 00:21:43,183
♪ You know the ones who love
you expect the most from you ♪
501
00:21:43,252 --> 00:21:46,587
♪ Once I held a perfect baby ♪
502
00:21:46,655 --> 00:21:49,573
♪ You slept soundly in my arms ♪
503
00:21:49,625 --> 00:21:54,694
♪ Now a woman is
awakening in you ♪
504
00:21:55,798 --> 00:21:59,099
♪ And I'll probably be jealous ♪
505
00:21:59,168 --> 00:22:03,204
♪ When your first
love rolls around ♪
506
00:22:03,272 --> 00:22:08,291
♪ I guess that calls for
extra understanding too ♪
507
00:22:08,361 --> 00:22:14,465
♪ We'll order up a cup
of tolerance for two ♪
508
00:22:14,534 --> 00:22:22,189
♪ You know the ones who love
you expect the most from you. ♪
509
00:22:26,695 --> 00:22:28,428
Oh, that was beautiful.
510
00:22:28,497 --> 00:22:30,497
Do you like it?
It was really nice.
511
00:22:30,566 --> 00:22:32,599
You know who wrote that?
512
00:22:32,668 --> 00:22:34,268
Your father wrote that.
513
00:22:36,338 --> 00:22:37,404
Daddy? I swear.
514
00:22:37,473 --> 00:22:39,706
I swear, the... the words are...
515
00:22:39,775 --> 00:22:41,174
are changed around a little,
516
00:22:41,243 --> 00:22:44,411
but the feelings, they're his.
517
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:47,231
Oscar, buy you a short beer.
518
00:22:53,756 --> 00:22:55,005
Did you really write that?
519
00:22:58,410 --> 00:23:01,045
I didn't write the music, but...
520
00:23:03,015 --> 00:23:05,949
The words...
521
00:23:07,136 --> 00:23:09,176
I never heard you
talk like that before.
522
00:23:10,089 --> 00:23:13,123
I never said those
things before.
523
00:23:13,192 --> 00:23:15,726
Sometimes it's very
hard to say things.
524
00:23:15,795 --> 00:23:17,928
I know, it's hard for me, too.
525
00:23:20,266 --> 00:23:22,799
How'd the wedding
go the other day?
526
00:23:25,054 --> 00:23:27,855
When you've seen one Polish
wedding, you've seen them all.
527
00:23:32,311 --> 00:23:34,812
Daddy, remember
when I was little,
528
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,763
when you used to
take me on your jobs?
529
00:23:37,867 --> 00:23:39,399
It was the most fun I ever had.
530
00:23:39,485 --> 00:23:41,151
Me, too.
531
00:23:41,219 --> 00:23:42,969
Do you have a job tomorrow?
532
00:23:43,038 --> 00:23:44,471
No.
533
00:23:44,540 --> 00:23:45,772
Oh.
534
00:23:45,841 --> 00:23:47,961
Well, that's okay, we
can do something else.
535
00:23:53,816 --> 00:23:55,883
You're getting so big.
536
00:23:55,951 --> 00:23:58,318
That's 'cause I'm
standing on the stage.
537
00:24:02,892 --> 00:24:05,452
You look so cute
in this uniform.
538
00:24:07,230 --> 00:24:08,907
You know, when you set a table,
539
00:24:08,931 --> 00:24:11,491
never put your fingers
on the inside of a glass.
540
00:24:20,359 --> 00:24:22,325
I love you, too.
541
00:24:22,394 --> 00:24:24,361
Good-bye, sweetheart.
542
00:24:26,832 --> 00:24:29,900
You know, something
good came out of all this.
543
00:24:29,969 --> 00:24:31,735
Edna and I are closer together
544
00:24:31,804 --> 00:24:34,171
than we ever were before.
545
00:24:34,239 --> 00:24:35,605
I'll tell you something.
546
00:24:35,675 --> 00:24:37,141
I owe it all to you.
547
00:24:37,209 --> 00:24:38,320
Oh... No, I really do.
548
00:24:38,344 --> 00:24:40,411
You're a wonderful
friend, Oscar.
549
00:24:40,479 --> 00:24:42,746
I just hope you know that...
550
00:24:42,815 --> 00:24:44,131
if the situation were reversed,
551
00:24:44,216 --> 00:24:46,199
I'd do the same for you.
552
00:24:46,268 --> 00:24:48,936
Just like that Paul
Williams song...
553
00:24:49,004 --> 00:24:53,073
♪ It's you and me
against the world ♪
554
00:24:53,142 --> 00:24:58,662
♪ Sometimes it feels it's you
and me against the world. ♪
555
00:24:58,731 --> 00:25:00,263
I'm betting on the world.
36697
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