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1
00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:09,152
There's ashes in the dip.
2
00:00:09,176 --> 00:00:11,927
I ran out of chives.
3
00:00:11,996 --> 00:00:14,379
Oh, I wish Felix was home.
4
00:00:33,750 --> 00:00:35,684
Deal the cards!
5
00:00:38,322 --> 00:00:43,125
One for Oscar, one
for Speed, one for him,
6
00:00:43,194 --> 00:00:46,761
one for me, one
for Oscar, Speed,
7
00:00:46,830 --> 00:00:49,131
another one for him.
8
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:50,365
That's it. That's it!
9
00:00:50,434 --> 00:00:51,528
The game's over.
10
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:52,862
Go on. Good night.
11
00:00:52,886 --> 00:00:54,152
Oscar, it isn't every day
12
00:00:54,221 --> 00:00:56,488
I get to play cards with
a big television celebrity.
13
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:58,034
Just because he's a celebrity
14
00:00:58,058 --> 00:00:59,635
doesn't make him
different than you and me.
15
00:00:59,659 --> 00:01:03,211
I can't believe you
went to college with him.
16
00:01:03,279 --> 00:01:05,414
And I can't believe
this poker game...
17
00:01:05,482 --> 00:01:07,362
You with him, you with your tie.
18
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:08,834
What's wrong with the tie?
19
00:01:08,903 --> 00:01:10,480
Speed, the last
time you wore a tie
20
00:01:10,504 --> 00:01:11,981
was when you had
a mark on your neck
21
00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:13,885
you didn't want
your wife to see.
22
00:01:15,276 --> 00:01:17,087
I'm telling you,
it's no big deal
23
00:01:17,111 --> 00:01:20,045
to play cards with Monty Hall.
24
00:01:21,181 --> 00:01:23,565
Especially when he beats you.
25
00:01:23,634 --> 00:01:24,977
So you won a couple of dollars.
26
00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:26,479
Now you can go back
to announcer's school
27
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:27,813
and get a diploma this time.
28
00:01:27,837 --> 00:01:29,482
Look, you know how much money
29
00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:31,651
I give away on my show every
day... thousands of dollars, right?
30
00:01:31,675 --> 00:01:33,486
You know how nice it is to
win a few bucks sometime?
31
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,204
You want it double or
nothing? No, no, no, no.
32
00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:37,374
Hey, uh, what happened
in that room back there?
33
00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:38,830
Oh, that's Oscar's room.
34
00:01:38,899 --> 00:01:40,332
We always laugh about it.
35
00:01:40,401 --> 00:01:42,379
No, no, I-I don't
mean Oscar's room.
36
00:01:42,403 --> 00:01:44,381
We used to laugh
about that in college, too.
37
00:01:44,405 --> 00:01:46,650
You know that's where we used to
keep the goat for the football team.
38
00:01:46,674 --> 00:01:49,257
He was a better
roommate than Felix.
39
00:01:49,326 --> 00:01:51,204
No, I mean, I mean
your roommate's room.
40
00:01:51,228 --> 00:01:52,348
It smells like something
41
00:01:52,412 --> 00:01:53,756
burned back there.
No, nothing. Forget it.
42
00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:55,258
Well, is that the end
of the game? That's it.
43
00:01:55,282 --> 00:01:56,562
Well, that's just as well.
44
00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:58,261
I got two Let's Make A
Deals to do tomorrow,
45
00:01:58,285 --> 00:01:59,762
and I need my rest.
Yeah, I gotta go, too.
46
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:00,718
Well, good night, Monty.
47
00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:01,886
Good night, Speed.
48
00:02:01,956 --> 00:02:03,266
It was a pleasure
meeting you. You, too.
49
00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:04,351
Good night, boys. 'Night, Speed.
50
00:02:04,375 --> 00:02:06,474
Thanks for autographing my chip.
51
00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:07,475
Ah, you're welcome.
52
00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:08,810
Hey, Oscar,
53
00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:10,423
I've been in town a whole week,
54
00:02:10,447 --> 00:02:12,109
and you haven't come down
to see my show once yet.
55
00:02:12,133 --> 00:02:13,443
How about you...
Well, it's great show.
56
00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:14,733
It's not my cup of tea.
57
00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:16,446
I don't want to see all those
people in crazy costumes
58
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:17,836
jumping up and down like that.
59
00:02:17,904 --> 00:02:19,024
Doesn't that really bug you?
60
00:02:19,056 --> 00:02:20,199
Why should it bug me?
61
00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:21,367
I like those people.
62
00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:23,369
They're very nice,
ordinary people.
63
00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:24,704
Well, good night, Oscar.
Good night, Murray.
64
00:02:24,728 --> 00:02:26,205
So long, Monty. Nice
seeing you again.
65
00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:27,663
Oh, Monty Hall!
66
00:02:27,731 --> 00:02:29,709
I heard you were
in the building.
67
00:02:29,733 --> 00:02:31,344
Pick me! Pick me!
Nice, ordinary people.
68
00:02:31,368 --> 00:02:32,448
Bye...
69
00:02:38,341 --> 00:02:40,119
The price of fame. Yep.
70
00:02:40,143 --> 00:02:41,776
Well, I gotta get going.
71
00:02:41,845 --> 00:02:43,823
No, no, no, I want you to
wait a minute. Why, what is it?
72
00:02:43,847 --> 00:02:45,780
I want you to help-help
me to throw Felix's bed
73
00:02:45,849 --> 00:02:47,827
down in the basement.
Are you two fighting again?
74
00:02:47,851 --> 00:02:49,601
No, no, listen, Murray...
75
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:51,770
I had an accident.
What happened?
76
00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:53,483
Well, my bed broke
down, I slept in here.
77
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:55,774
I fell asleep smoking
a cigar. See?
78
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:06,732
You through with the tweets?
79
00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,969
Grab the mattress, will you?
80
00:03:11,958 --> 00:03:16,361
Oh! That goes right through the
box springs down to the carpet.
81
00:03:16,430 --> 00:03:18,830
Do the people downstairs
know about this?
82
00:03:18,899 --> 00:03:20,877
Will you grab the mattress?
83
00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:22,712
Felix won't be
back for three days.
84
00:03:22,736 --> 00:03:25,296
There's no reason
he has to find out...
85
00:03:32,896 --> 00:03:35,875
On November 13, Felix Unger
was asked to remove himself
86
00:03:35,899 --> 00:03:37,165
from his place of residence.
87
00:03:38,568 --> 00:03:41,003
That request came from his wife.
88
00:03:41,071 --> 00:03:43,005
Deep down, he
knew she was right,
89
00:03:43,073 --> 00:03:47,009
but he also knew that
someday he would return to her.
90
00:03:47,077 --> 00:03:48,610
With nowhere else to go,
91
00:03:48,679 --> 00:03:51,496
he appeared at the home
of his friend, Oscar Madison.
92
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:52,730
Several years earlier,
93
00:03:52,799 --> 00:03:54,610
Madison's wife
had thrown him out,
94
00:03:54,634 --> 00:03:57,085
requesting that he never return.
95
00:03:57,154 --> 00:03:59,637
Can two divorced
men share an apartment
96
00:03:59,690 --> 00:04:01,840
without driving
each other crazy?
97
00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:05,276
♪ ♪
98
00:04:49,189 --> 00:04:52,457
The Odd Couple was filmed
in front of a live audience.
99
00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:56,506
What... By the time I put it out
100
00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:58,797
and found the cigar and
everything, that's what I had.
101
00:04:58,865 --> 00:05:01,265
It's just a little hole. Just...
102
00:05:01,335 --> 00:05:03,968
And here's another little hole.
103
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:05,515
What do I see down there?
104
00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:07,806
Hello, Mrs. Johnson.
105
00:05:07,874 --> 00:05:09,519
Where am I supposed to sleep?
106
00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:10,942
I'll take care of that, buddy.
107
00:05:11,010 --> 00:05:13,611
Look at that... Look
at my beautiful bed!
108
00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:15,613
Nice to see you home, Felix.
109
00:05:15,682 --> 00:05:18,783
I had nothing to do with this.
110
00:05:18,852 --> 00:05:20,352
Good night, Oscar!
111
00:05:21,688 --> 00:05:23,566
Here, buddy, what, are
you kidding? Look at that.
112
00:05:23,590 --> 00:05:26,002
I'm not gonna sleep on
an army cot. Put it there.
113
00:05:26,026 --> 00:05:28,092
You want me to bathe
out of my helmet?
114
00:05:28,162 --> 00:05:31,530
This was Blanche
and my wedding bed.
115
00:05:31,598 --> 00:05:33,893
Look, you weren't supposed
to come back until Tuesday.
116
00:05:33,917 --> 00:05:35,349
The job ended soon.
117
00:05:35,419 --> 00:05:36,584
Forgive me.
118
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:39,604
I rushed home. I took a plane.
119
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:44,108
All I could think of was the security
of sleeping in my own comfy bed.
120
00:05:44,178 --> 00:05:46,110
Didn't you sleep on
one of these in the army?
121
00:05:46,180 --> 00:05:47,745
I did not.
122
00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:50,398
I had an orthopedic cot.
123
00:05:50,467 --> 00:05:52,178
And I bought it
special in the PX.
124
00:05:52,202 --> 00:05:53,679
The other guys made fun of me,
125
00:05:53,703 --> 00:05:55,681
but I'm the one who won
the good posture medal.
126
00:05:55,705 --> 00:05:57,986
Why am I talking
about...? I... I need a bed.
127
00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:59,368
Look, here's all
the money I have.
128
00:05:59,392 --> 00:06:01,037
Tomorrow you'll go
and you'll buy a bed.
129
00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:03,494
I saw one advertised for $55.00.
130
00:06:03,564 --> 00:06:06,097
What kind of bed can
you get for $55.00?
131
00:06:06,150 --> 00:06:07,399
Hardly used.
132
00:06:07,451 --> 00:06:10,384
Light another cigar, Oscar!
133
00:06:10,454 --> 00:06:12,270
Burn a hole in my heart!
134
00:06:12,322 --> 00:06:13,800
It's all the money
I have. Try it.
135
00:06:13,824 --> 00:06:15,134
Go ahead. You'll become...
136
00:06:15,158 --> 00:06:16,438
I can't sleep in
this damn thing.
137
00:06:16,492 --> 00:06:18,137
You'll be snug
as a bug in a rug.
138
00:06:18,161 --> 00:06:19,806
Go on, lie down,
put your feet up.
139
00:06:19,830 --> 00:06:22,430
I'm too tired to
take my clothes off.
140
00:06:22,498 --> 00:06:23,976
That's great. Here you go.
141
00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:25,433
Good night, buddy.
142
00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:53,344
Oscar. Yeah.
143
00:06:53,414 --> 00:06:54,679
Come in here, please.
144
00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:56,259
Coming, coming, coming.
145
00:06:56,283 --> 00:06:58,216
How you doing, buddy?
146
00:06:58,285 --> 00:06:59,818
How did you sleep last night?
147
00:06:59,887 --> 00:07:02,447
Great. How did you sleep?
148
00:07:03,557 --> 00:07:04,823
I slept beautifully,
149
00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:07,325
except that I had to get
up every hour for my spasm.
150
00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:08,705
Oh, your back? Here, sit down.
151
00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:11,241
What? Oh, okay,
okay, here we go.
152
00:07:11,265 --> 00:07:13,008
Let me know if
this hurts, will you?
153
00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:14,399
Oh!
154
00:07:14,468 --> 00:07:15,945
'Cause I don't know
what the heck I'm doing.
155
00:07:15,969 --> 00:07:17,447
Oh, oh, enough! Oh, oh.
156
00:07:17,471 --> 00:07:18,719
How's your back feel?
157
00:07:18,806 --> 00:07:20,405
Better.
158
00:07:20,473 --> 00:07:23,374
And my ears hurt.
159
00:07:23,444 --> 00:07:24,810
What do you want, Felix?
160
00:07:24,878 --> 00:07:26,158
Sit down, Oscar.
161
00:07:26,212 --> 00:07:28,024
I have my figures here now.
162
00:07:28,048 --> 00:07:29,614
What figures?
163
00:07:29,683 --> 00:07:31,282
What you owe me.
164
00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:32,584
Owe you for what?
165
00:07:32,653 --> 00:07:34,319
For my bed.
166
00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:36,321
I gave you the money
for your bed last night.
167
00:07:36,389 --> 00:07:38,701
No, you gave me money
for your idea of the bed.
168
00:07:38,725 --> 00:07:40,870
You're going to make good
for the property you destroyed.
169
00:07:40,894 --> 00:07:42,138
Now, I have here:
170
00:07:42,162 --> 00:07:45,764
one mattress, one box spring,
171
00:07:45,832 --> 00:07:50,502
one carpet and
sundries... $975.00.
172
00:07:52,889 --> 00:07:55,189
How much is it
without the sundries?
173
00:07:55,259 --> 00:07:59,527
$965 Are you out of your mind?
174
00:07:59,595 --> 00:08:00,912
I don't have that kind of money.
175
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:03,915
Well, you're going to
have to get it, Mr. Firebug.
176
00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:05,795
That was a custom-
made mattress.
177
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:07,129
Custom-made? Yes.
178
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:08,230
You know how they come
179
00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:10,133
in soft, regular,
firm and very firm.
180
00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:11,967
Well, mine was very
firm around the edges
181
00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:13,090
and soft in the center.
182
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:14,587
It was the only one
like it in the world.
183
00:08:14,611 --> 00:08:16,556
Well, why don't we
get a very firm mattress,
184
00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:18,146
and I'll jump in the middle.
185
00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:23,351
Are you going to reimburse me
for my property or are you not?
186
00:08:23,419 --> 00:08:25,120
Felix, I told you last night,
187
00:08:25,188 --> 00:08:27,122
I gave you all the
money I've got.
188
00:08:27,190 --> 00:08:28,935
Drinks beer for breakfast.
189
00:08:28,959 --> 00:08:30,858
No caffeine.
190
00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:33,411
You owe me!
191
00:08:33,463 --> 00:08:35,063
Felix, what do you want?
192
00:08:35,131 --> 00:08:36,576
I can't help it,
I don't have it.
193
00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:37,949
Well, I don't have it.
194
00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:38,866
I'm sorry.
195
00:08:38,936 --> 00:08:39,979
Well, sorry isn't going
196
00:08:40,003 --> 00:08:42,805
to buy me a new
bed... or a new back!
197
00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:44,934
This is on your head.
198
00:08:46,944 --> 00:08:48,226
Come in.
199
00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:50,890
Oh, Miriam. Felix!
200
00:08:50,914 --> 00:08:52,224
Miriam. You're home.
201
00:08:52,248 --> 00:08:54,093
I didn't expect
you till Tuesday.
202
00:08:54,117 --> 00:08:55,695
Oh...
203
00:08:55,719 --> 00:08:57,452
What, your back?
204
00:08:57,538 --> 00:08:59,465
How did you hurt your back?
205
00:08:59,489 --> 00:09:01,689
I slept on an
army cot last night.
206
00:09:01,757 --> 00:09:05,026
Oscar used my
mattress for an ashtray.
207
00:09:05,095 --> 00:09:07,245
Oh... Oh, you poor baby.
208
00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:09,581
I came down, Oscar, to
thank you for those tickets.
209
00:09:09,633 --> 00:09:10,564
Oh, that's okay.
210
00:09:10,634 --> 00:09:14,368
Tickets to what?
The Chicago fire?
211
00:09:14,437 --> 00:09:16,082
Oscar got tickets
for my mother and me
212
00:09:16,106 --> 00:09:17,583
to go see Let's Make A Deal.
213
00:09:17,607 --> 00:09:19,235
My mother won
a color television.
214
00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:20,007
You're kidding.
215
00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:21,192
No. And then, and then
216
00:09:21,260 --> 00:09:22,460
Monty Hall gave her a kiss.
217
00:09:22,528 --> 00:09:23,823
She liked that better
than the television.
218
00:09:23,847 --> 00:09:24,946
Monty's a great kisser.
219
00:09:25,014 --> 00:09:26,159
Yeah. I gotta go to work.
220
00:09:26,183 --> 00:09:27,048
I'll see you later.
221
00:09:27,116 --> 00:09:29,676
Now, take care of yourself.
222
00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:43,331
What? What? What?
223
00:09:43,399 --> 00:09:46,968
You're going on
Let's Make A Deal.
224
00:09:47,037 --> 00:09:48,853
Are you crazy?
225
00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:50,855
You're gonna win a new bed,
226
00:09:50,924 --> 00:09:53,190
your friends are
gonna see you on TV,
227
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:56,594
and Monty Hall is
gonna kiss your mother.
228
00:10:01,250 --> 00:10:03,228
Where's your friend, Monty Hall?
229
00:10:03,252 --> 00:10:05,230
How long does he
expect me to wait?
230
00:10:05,254 --> 00:10:07,789
He's doing us a favor, remember?
231
00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:10,424
Felix, could you show a
little more enthusiasm?
232
00:10:10,493 --> 00:10:12,160
They like bubbly
people on this show.
233
00:10:12,228 --> 00:10:13,339
Sorry, I can't help it.
234
00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:14,462
Well, force yourself.
235
00:10:14,530 --> 00:10:16,030
They like a guy with enthusiasm.
236
00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:17,594
Enthusiasm has
nothing to do with it.
237
00:10:17,618 --> 00:10:18,962
You make the right
choice and you win.
238
00:10:18,986 --> 00:10:20,596
Yeah, before you can
make the right choice,
239
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:22,020
you have to be chosen.
240
00:10:22,089 --> 00:10:23,369
How do you do that?
241
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:24,550
Well, you get Monty's attention.
242
00:10:24,574 --> 00:10:26,274
He'll notice me.
243
00:10:26,342 --> 00:10:28,509
A nice gentleman sitting here.
244
00:10:28,578 --> 00:10:30,511
Felix, you're out of your mind.
245
00:10:30,580 --> 00:10:31,580
You must... Look,
246
00:10:31,665 --> 00:10:32,945
I'll show you how
the show works.
247
00:10:32,999 --> 00:10:34,309
I'll be Monty Hall,
you'll be a contestant.
248
00:10:34,333 --> 00:10:35,645
All right, you'll
see how it works.
249
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:37,312
Okay, I'm Monty Hall
and I come down and I say,
250
00:10:37,336 --> 00:10:40,038
"Now, who am I going
to make a deal with?"
251
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:45,360
Oh, sure.
252
00:10:45,429 --> 00:10:48,162
Oh, sure, he's gonna pick
you with your hand like that
253
00:10:48,231 --> 00:10:50,832
when there's an egg salad
sandwich over there screaming,
254
00:10:50,901 --> 00:10:52,701
"Take me! Not the gentleman!
255
00:10:52,736 --> 00:10:53,835
Take me! Take me!"
256
00:10:53,904 --> 00:10:55,214
What am I supposed to do?
257
00:10:55,238 --> 00:10:57,216
You're supposed to
stand up and yell and jump.
258
00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:58,718
I can't do that. Oh, come on.
259
00:10:58,742 --> 00:11:00,052
Where's your sense
of showmanship?
260
00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:01,175
Where's your personality?
261
00:11:01,244 --> 00:11:02,622
You want me to
jump and down? Yeah.
262
00:11:02,646 --> 00:11:04,223
Pick me! Pick me! Right,
right. Exactly, right, exactly.
263
00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:05,179
That feels good.
264
00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:06,391
Pick me! Pick me! Pick me!
265
00:11:06,415 --> 00:11:07,559
Buddy, all right,
I pick you. Yeah.
266
00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:09,133
I pick you, right?
Now, I say to you,
267
00:11:09,202 --> 00:11:12,469
"Would you take the
$500 that's in this envelope,
268
00:11:12,538 --> 00:11:16,391
or take what's behind
curtain number one?
269
00:11:16,460 --> 00:11:17,603
Oh, I'll take the curtain.
270
00:11:17,627 --> 00:11:19,561
No, no, no, not the
cur... not the curtain!
271
00:11:19,629 --> 00:11:21,841
Why not? 'Cause you don't
know what's behind there.
272
00:11:21,865 --> 00:11:22,964
Maybe a polar bear.
273
00:11:23,032 --> 00:11:24,360
How'd you like to
sleep on a polar bear?
274
00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:25,664
He's softer than that cot.
275
00:11:25,719 --> 00:11:28,252
Felix, believe me,
take the money.
276
00:11:28,305 --> 00:11:29,903
But I want a bed.
277
00:11:29,973 --> 00:11:31,238
The odds are against you.
278
00:11:31,307 --> 00:11:32,257
Take the money.
279
00:11:32,309 --> 00:11:33,741
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
280
00:11:33,810 --> 00:11:35,121
I wonder what's
behind the curtain.
281
00:11:35,145 --> 00:11:37,245
Oh, don't peek. No,
you're not supposed to...
282
00:11:39,081 --> 00:11:40,248
Can I be of any help?
283
00:11:40,316 --> 00:11:41,882
Oscar! Hi.
284
00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:43,096
I know you.
285
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:44,400
You're Monty Hall.
286
00:11:44,454 --> 00:11:46,754
Let's Make A Deal.
287
00:11:46,823 --> 00:11:49,089
This is my bubbly
roommate, Felix.
288
00:11:49,158 --> 00:11:50,969
Oh, yeah. Hi, Felix, how
are you? Good to meet you.
289
00:11:50,993 --> 00:11:52,360
Oscar, what are you doing here?
290
00:11:52,429 --> 00:11:54,140
Didn't you tell me you'd never
come down to see my show?
291
00:11:54,164 --> 00:11:55,496
Well, I'm not here for myself.
292
00:11:55,565 --> 00:11:57,343
Do you remember what
you smelled in my apartment?
293
00:11:57,367 --> 00:11:58,599
Yeah. That was Felix's bed.
294
00:11:58,668 --> 00:11:59,978
It burned. See, I
burned it. Oh, yeah.
295
00:12:00,002 --> 00:12:01,313
Now, I'd like to get him
on "Let's Make A Deal"
296
00:12:01,337 --> 00:12:02,457
so he could win another one.
297
00:12:02,506 --> 00:12:03,983
No way. OSCAR: Aw...
298
00:12:04,007 --> 00:12:05,239
No, no, I'm sorry,
299
00:12:05,308 --> 00:12:06,536
I couldn't get either
one of you on the show.
300
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,303
But you're the big man here.
301
00:12:08,327 --> 00:12:09,694
He's a crowd pleaser.
302
00:12:09,763 --> 00:12:11,941
Well, no, maybe, maybe
not a crowd pleaser,
303
00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:14,599
more of a group pleaser,
actually... small groups.
304
00:12:14,668 --> 00:12:15,878
Felix... They like
me. Little people...
305
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:17,813
you see, we have
rules on this show.
306
00:12:17,837 --> 00:12:20,337
The rules state no
friends, no relatives,
307
00:12:20,407 --> 00:12:21,655
no friends of relatives,
308
00:12:21,742 --> 00:12:23,586
no relatives of friends...
Yeah, but who's gonna know?
309
00:12:23,610 --> 00:12:24,976
I'm going to know.
310
00:12:25,044 --> 00:12:26,589
Monty, we need you
in the control booth.
311
00:12:26,613 --> 00:12:27,823
All right, I'll be
right up there.
312
00:12:27,847 --> 00:12:28,891
Why don't you stick around?
313
00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,226
Maybe we can
see each other later.
314
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:32,970
Huh? Nice to meet you.
315
00:12:35,188 --> 00:12:37,122
That's that.
316
00:12:39,593 --> 00:12:43,060
Felix, I'm gonna get you
up on Let's Make A Deal.
317
00:12:43,130 --> 00:12:45,847
I don't want to do
anything devious, Oscar.
318
00:12:45,932 --> 00:12:47,398
You heard him say when...
319
00:12:47,467 --> 00:12:49,467
Felix, don't listen... I
outsmarted him in college,
320
00:12:49,502 --> 00:12:51,101
I outsmarted him
at the poker table,
321
00:12:51,170 --> 00:12:53,871
and I'm going to outsmart
him on Let's Make A Deal!
322
00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:55,418
Yeah, but if this doesn't work,
323
00:12:55,442 --> 00:12:57,754
I'll be humiliated in
front of 30 million people.
324
00:12:57,778 --> 00:13:00,078
That's a chance
I'm willing to take.
325
00:13:05,768 --> 00:13:07,246
Come on. Hurry
up, will ya, Felix?
326
00:13:07,270 --> 00:13:08,614
Miriam will be down any minute.
327
00:13:08,638 --> 00:13:10,388
I don't want Miriam
to see me like this.
328
00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:11,789
She's not gonna recognize you,
329
00:13:11,858 --> 00:13:14,092
which will prove that
Monty won't recognize you.
330
00:13:14,161 --> 00:13:16,861
Come on, I told her she's gonna
have a big surprise. Come on.
331
00:13:16,929 --> 00:13:18,229
Hey, that looks great!
332
00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:20,865
Good. Oh...
333
00:13:30,377 --> 00:13:31,687
Hey... Oh, just stay, stay...
334
00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:34,778
She's here. Come in, Miriam.
335
00:13:34,848 --> 00:13:35,947
Hi.
336
00:13:36,015 --> 00:13:37,114
Hi, Miriam.
337
00:13:37,183 --> 00:13:39,143
Hey, Felix, that's
a great costume.
338
00:13:40,937 --> 00:13:42,770
She recognized me right away.
339
00:13:42,839 --> 00:13:45,150
Why, that's because she knows
you live here, right, Miriam?
340
00:13:45,174 --> 00:13:47,775
No, actually Felix, I
recognized your walk.
341
00:13:47,844 --> 00:13:50,389
How did you happen
to choose a chicken?
342
00:13:50,413 --> 00:13:51,523
How did I choose a chicken?
343
00:13:51,547 --> 00:13:52,558
He chose it.
344
00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,399
I've watched that show.
345
00:13:54,451 --> 00:13:56,262
Everybody goes as a chicken.
346
00:13:56,286 --> 00:13:58,014
This won't work. Nobody
goes as a chicken.
347
00:13:58,038 --> 00:13:59,882
In the words of Abraham Lincoln,
348
00:13:59,906 --> 00:14:01,950
"You can fool some of
the people all of the time,"
349
00:14:01,974 --> 00:14:03,236
but never in feathers.
350
00:14:03,260 --> 00:14:05,025
Hey, Felix!
351
00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:07,045
There you go, Abraham Lincoln!
352
00:14:07,097 --> 00:14:09,863
Abraham Lincoln jumping up
and down saying, "Notice me,
353
00:14:09,932 --> 00:14:10,943
pick me, Monty, pick me!"
354
00:14:10,967 --> 00:14:13,300
Lincoln was six-foot-five.
355
00:14:13,386 --> 00:14:16,520
Okay, you'll go
as young Lincoln.
356
00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:17,788
How does it look, Miriam?
357
00:14:17,858 --> 00:14:19,607
Like Abraham Chicken.
358
00:14:21,728 --> 00:14:22,660
I'm not going to do it.
359
00:14:22,729 --> 00:14:24,907
Hey, put these on, put these on.
360
00:14:24,931 --> 00:14:27,491
There we go. You can
go as Murray's brother.
361
00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:32,803
I'm not going to do it.
362
00:14:34,107 --> 00:14:38,042
How does a man get
out of this chicken outfit?
363
00:14:38,111 --> 00:14:39,643
Okay, it's off my head.
364
00:14:39,712 --> 00:14:40,978
He just won't go on.
365
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:43,425
Yes, I will go on,
but I won't go on as
366
00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:46,384
Murray's brother or as the
President with drumsticks.
367
00:14:46,452 --> 00:14:48,430
It must be a very
special costume,
368
00:14:48,454 --> 00:14:50,366
and I've thought
of the perfect one.
369
00:14:50,390 --> 00:14:51,322
I ask only one thing of you.
370
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:52,624
What?
371
00:14:52,676 --> 00:14:53,824
Back me up.
372
00:14:57,997 --> 00:14:59,808
Felix, this is ridiculous.
373
00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:01,143
It's a perfect costume.
374
00:15:01,167 --> 00:15:02,599
Monty will never recognize us.
375
00:15:02,668 --> 00:15:04,479
I get the feeling I'm
gonna be embarrassed.
376
00:15:04,503 --> 00:15:05,547
You got a better idea?
377
00:15:05,571 --> 00:15:06,503
No.
378
00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:08,505
Then relax. Have fun.
379
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:12,693
So you turned down the
$1,000 for curtain number three,
380
00:15:12,779 --> 00:15:14,840
and let's take a look and
see what we have back there.
381
00:15:14,864 --> 00:15:20,134
Oh, 200 cantaloupes,
worth $94.36.
382
00:15:20,203 --> 00:15:22,081
But that's the way it happens
sometimes when you get so...
383
00:15:22,105 --> 00:15:24,688
Thank you for being such a
good sport on Let's Make A Deal,
384
00:15:24,758 --> 00:15:27,039
and in just a moment, after
this commercial message,
385
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:29,238
we're going to come back
and pay ten dollars for anyone
386
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:30,361
who has a rubber band.
387
00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:32,696
That'll be just one
minute from now.
388
00:15:32,766 --> 00:15:34,531
How are we doing on time?
389
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:35,677
We're right on the second.
390
00:15:35,701 --> 00:15:36,934
Oscar. What?
391
00:15:37,003 --> 00:15:38,848
You've got a rubber
band. This is our chance.
392
00:15:38,872 --> 00:15:39,804
No, I don't. Yes, you do.
393
00:15:39,873 --> 00:15:41,167
It's holding your socks up.
394
00:15:41,191 --> 00:15:43,291
Give it to me.
395
00:15:45,195 --> 00:15:46,794
Felix, this is silly...
396
00:15:46,862 --> 00:15:49,408
I know it's silly, but
ten dollars is ten dollars.
397
00:15:49,432 --> 00:15:50,576
Here. Where is it?
398
00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:52,300
Here. Will he take it broken?
399
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:53,879
Oh, I don't know
what's happening to me.
400
00:15:53,903 --> 00:15:55,670
A week ago, I was
a happy sportswriter.
401
00:15:55,738 --> 00:15:57,488
Today I'm the back
end of Mister Ed.
402
00:15:57,540 --> 00:16:00,474
Don't worry, we're
gonna get on the show.
403
00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:02,643
We've got the best costume here.
404
00:16:02,711 --> 00:16:05,746
You just see some of these
ridiculous people around here.
405
00:16:05,814 --> 00:16:07,526
All right, time once again
406
00:16:07,550 --> 00:16:10,117
to go back to Let's Make A
Deal and pay off those ten dollars
407
00:16:10,186 --> 00:16:11,830
for every rubber band we have.
408
00:16:11,854 --> 00:16:13,165
Here's a young
lady right over here.
409
00:16:13,189 --> 00:16:14,721
Here's your ten dollars.
410
00:16:14,790 --> 00:16:16,350
Thank you very much
for the rubber band.
411
00:16:18,461 --> 00:16:20,439
Now down, boy, down, down!
412
00:16:20,463 --> 00:16:21,395
Down, Silver.
413
00:16:21,464 --> 00:16:22,625
There's a good horse.
414
00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:24,226
There you are.
415
00:16:24,250 --> 00:16:26,261
We'll take the rubber band
and we'll give you ten dollars.
416
00:16:26,285 --> 00:16:27,496
There you are.
417
00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:29,165
Now who else might
have... Let's make a deal!
418
00:16:29,189 --> 00:16:31,822
Let's make a deal,
Monty, let's make a deal!
419
00:16:31,891 --> 00:16:33,658
This horse is a nag.
420
00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:35,704
You want to make another deal?
421
00:16:35,728 --> 00:16:37,206
All right, we'll take
your ten dollars
422
00:16:37,230 --> 00:16:38,707
so you can trade for
what's behind the curtain.
423
00:16:38,731 --> 00:16:40,543
But first of all, let's see
who I'm dealing with here.
424
00:16:40,567 --> 00:16:46,404
This is Frederick Ungman
and... Ozzie Malone.
425
00:16:46,472 --> 00:16:48,384
All right, Frederick and Ozzie,
426
00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:50,403
let's see what we have for you
427
00:16:50,427 --> 00:16:51,707
behind the curtain.
428
00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:54,378
And you have yourself
a new waffle iron.
429
00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:57,982
A waffle iron.
430
00:16:58,051 --> 00:17:00,985
Don't you have any
bedroom furniture back there?
431
00:17:01,054 --> 00:17:02,697
Just a minute, Frederick.
432
00:17:02,721 --> 00:17:04,199
You haven't seen it all, because
433
00:17:04,223 --> 00:17:06,035
there's something that
goes with the waffle iron.
434
00:17:06,059 --> 00:17:07,620
Oh. Right behind
the other curtain.
435
00:17:07,644 --> 00:17:12,379
So, you can keep your waffle
iron and what's behind it or...
436
00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:15,294
Mm-hmm. Or? You could
have what's under the box...
437
00:17:15,318 --> 00:17:16,250
Uh-huh. Or...
438
00:17:16,319 --> 00:17:17,462
Another or? Yes, you can have
439
00:17:17,486 --> 00:17:18,419
what's in this envelope,
440
00:17:18,487 --> 00:17:19,420
but here I have some money
441
00:17:19,488 --> 00:17:20,666
and I guarantee you,
442
00:17:20,690 --> 00:17:22,334
there's at least
$100 in cash in there.
443
00:17:22,358 --> 00:17:24,292
Take the envelope!
444
00:17:28,231 --> 00:17:30,209
I don't want the
envelope, I want a bed.
445
00:17:30,233 --> 00:17:31,665
Take the envelope!
446
00:17:31,734 --> 00:17:32,878
What is it going to be?
447
00:17:32,902 --> 00:17:34,113
The envelope or the
curtain or the box?
448
00:17:34,137 --> 00:17:35,781
The en... the
curtain... the bo...
449
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:38,589
I... Take the money and run!
450
00:17:38,641 --> 00:17:41,074
Goodness, folks, Ozzie speaks.
451
00:17:41,144 --> 00:17:42,954
This is a very talented horse.
452
00:17:42,978 --> 00:17:45,630
It talks at both ends.
453
00:17:45,682 --> 00:17:47,993
Why don't you, uh, why
don't you take off your costume
454
00:17:48,017 --> 00:17:49,528
and let's take a look and
see what you look like.
455
00:17:49,552 --> 00:17:50,863
No! No! Huh, come on, folks,
456
00:17:50,887 --> 00:17:52,131
everybody wants
to see your faces.
457
00:17:52,155 --> 00:17:53,086
Why don't you do that?
458
00:17:53,156 --> 00:17:54,666
No. Some other time, folks.
459
00:17:54,690 --> 00:17:56,157
Ah, now, come on, no,
460
00:17:56,225 --> 00:17:58,637
you don't take off the
costume, it's no deal.
461
00:17:58,661 --> 00:18:00,239
Come on now, Felix.
No, no, that's blackmail.
462
00:18:00,263 --> 00:18:02,508
Come on, there we go. No,
no, no, no, that's blackmail!
463
00:18:02,532 --> 00:18:04,226
Oh, no... There we are.
464
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,316
Felix!
465
00:18:06,385 --> 00:18:08,452
Felix Unger.
466
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:09,915
Folks, you know who this is?
467
00:18:09,939 --> 00:18:14,074
This is New York's finest
photographer, Felix Unger.
468
00:18:14,143 --> 00:18:16,777
Hello, America.
469
00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:19,406
I wonder who's in the other end.
470
00:18:19,448 --> 00:18:20,493
Could it possibly be...
471
00:18:20,517 --> 00:18:21,660
Oscar, Oscar, Oscar.
472
00:18:21,684 --> 00:18:23,128
Could... yeah, well, there...
473
00:18:23,152 --> 00:18:27,755
Yes, it's Oscar Madison,
New York's finest sportswriter.
474
00:18:27,824 --> 00:18:30,135
Oscar, what are you doing now?
475
00:18:30,159 --> 00:18:31,637
Covering the races
from the inside?
476
00:18:31,661 --> 00:18:32,938
Ha. Come on out here.
477
00:18:32,962 --> 00:18:33,911
Let's take a look at you.
478
00:18:33,980 --> 00:18:35,023
Come on, Oscar.
479
00:18:35,047 --> 00:18:35,980
Might as well.
480
00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:37,548
Keep your sense of humor.
481
00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:39,550
What about my sense of dignity?
482
00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:41,551
So, Oscar Madison.
483
00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:43,232
This is the man who said,
484
00:18:43,256 --> 00:18:44,866
"Where do you get
all those crazy people
485
00:18:44,890 --> 00:18:46,218
who come dressed
to your show, huh?"
486
00:18:46,242 --> 00:18:49,543
And here he is himself,
in the horse's flesh.
487
00:18:50,947 --> 00:18:52,691
You're a clever man. Yes.
488
00:18:52,715 --> 00:18:54,259
Well, this sounds
like a good time
489
00:18:54,283 --> 00:18:55,927
to take a break for a
commercial message
490
00:18:55,951 --> 00:18:58,029
and then we'll come
back for the next half
491
00:18:58,053 --> 00:18:59,986
of the Oscar and Felix Show,
492
00:19:00,055 --> 00:19:01,951
which should be a
lot of fun. Stick around.
493
00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:03,207
Thirty seconds, Monty.
494
00:19:03,259 --> 00:19:06,393
Right. Well, Oscar,
nice to have you here.
495
00:19:06,462 --> 00:19:08,140
You look just great in tails.
496
00:19:08,164 --> 00:19:10,064
You kill me, Monty.
497
00:19:10,133 --> 00:19:11,777
Speak up, don't mumble.
498
00:19:11,801 --> 00:19:13,951
Kill!!
499
00:19:14,020 --> 00:19:15,998
I just can't believe it.
500
00:19:16,022 --> 00:19:17,800
Oscar Madison right
here on my show.
501
00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:19,239
That's terrific.
502
00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:21,303
D-Does this mean you're
going to have to disqualify us?
503
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:22,576
Would I do a thing like that?
504
00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:23,510
I bet he would.
505
00:19:23,580 --> 00:19:25,212
No, no, that's not my style.
506
00:19:25,281 --> 00:19:29,116
Aw, doggone it,
Mr. Hall, you're a person.
507
00:19:29,185 --> 00:19:31,752
Yeah. No wonder
millions of people love you.
508
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:32,853
You're on, Monty.
509
00:19:32,922 --> 00:19:34,187
All right.
510
00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:36,234
It's time now to resume
with Felix and Oscar.
511
00:19:36,258 --> 00:19:38,859
You boys know what you
have... You have the waffle iron,
512
00:19:38,928 --> 00:19:41,239
and I said you could have
that and what's behind it. Yeah.
513
00:19:41,263 --> 00:19:42,963
Or the box or the cash,
514
00:19:43,032 --> 00:19:45,633
and we know there's at least
one hundred dollars in cash.
515
00:19:45,701 --> 00:19:46,912
So what's it going to be?
516
00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:49,369
Ah, oh... let-let's
consider this
517
00:19:49,439 --> 00:19:50,833
very, very carefully.
518
00:19:50,857 --> 00:19:52,056
Sure, take the envelope.
519
00:19:52,124 --> 00:19:53,406
Why the envelope? Why not?
520
00:19:53,476 --> 00:19:54,954
Good thinking. We'll
take the envelope.
521
00:19:54,978 --> 00:19:56,455
You're going to take
the envelope. All right.
522
00:19:56,479 --> 00:19:59,713
First of all we'll see what
was behind the waffle iron.
523
00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:01,760
There was a gourmet rotisserie!
524
00:20:01,784 --> 00:20:04,318
Oh, a rotisserie.
525
00:20:04,387 --> 00:20:07,321
I've always wanted that.
526
00:20:07,390 --> 00:20:08,722
Oh, we blew it.
527
00:20:08,791 --> 00:20:09,934
Wait a minute, now.
528
00:20:09,958 --> 00:20:11,870
That's what was
behind the waffle iron.
529
00:20:11,894 --> 00:20:14,454
Now, let's take a look and see
what you blew under the box.
530
00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,513
It was a microwave oven!
531
00:20:16,583 --> 00:20:18,515
Oh, oh, I've always wanted a...
532
00:20:18,585 --> 00:20:20,851
Oh, you blew it. You blew it.
533
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:24,855
Not necessarily, because I
said you still have cash in here.
534
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:27,152
Now, let's find out how
much cash we have.
535
00:20:27,176 --> 00:20:29,154
I told you there's at
least one hundred dollars?
536
00:20:29,178 --> 00:20:30,321
There's the one hundred.
537
00:20:30,345 --> 00:20:31,422
Now, watch this.
538
00:20:31,446 --> 00:20:34,114
Two hundred...
three hundred... four...
539
00:20:34,183 --> 00:20:35,248
Oh!
540
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:37,295
Five hundred...
six hundred... Oh!
541
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:38,630
Felix! Seven hundred...
542
00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:39,953
eight hundred dollars!
543
00:20:40,022 --> 00:20:41,933
Eight hundred dollars! Just
what I've always wanted.
544
00:20:41,957 --> 00:20:43,356
I didn't blow it.
545
00:20:43,425 --> 00:20:45,754
Now that you have the
eight hundred dollars,
546
00:20:45,778 --> 00:20:48,357
maybe you'd be interested in
trading the eight hundred dollars
547
00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:50,692
for one of our three curtains
because the Big Deal today
548
00:20:50,716 --> 00:20:52,394
is worth over five
thousand dollars.
549
00:20:52,418 --> 00:20:53,550
No. Yes! Yes!
550
00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:56,179
The yeses have it
two to one. All right.
551
00:20:58,724 --> 00:21:00,702
You decide what
curtain you want,
552
00:21:00,726 --> 00:21:03,188
and I'll see if I can find somebody else
to trade away what they already have.
553
00:21:03,212 --> 00:21:05,896
Felix, what's the... Don't
get greedy. Take the money.
554
00:21:05,965 --> 00:21:08,499
What is eight hundred dollars
compared to five thousand?
555
00:21:08,568 --> 00:21:09,867
I feel lucky.
556
00:21:09,936 --> 00:21:11,814
Felix, we're liable to lose
everything. Listen to me!
557
00:21:11,838 --> 00:21:13,136
If I had listened to you,
558
00:21:13,205 --> 00:21:14,700
we wouldn't be in
this swell horse's outfit!
559
00:21:14,724 --> 00:21:17,324
All right now, this
gentleman right back here
560
00:21:17,392 --> 00:21:19,305
is going to trade in
his refrigerator-freezer
561
00:21:19,329 --> 00:21:20,405
for curtain number three.
562
00:21:20,429 --> 00:21:21,907
What curtain do you want?
563
00:21:21,931 --> 00:21:24,009
Oh, oh, I... That means I can
have number one or number two?
564
00:21:24,033 --> 00:21:25,127
That's right.
565
00:21:25,151 --> 00:21:26,461
Okay, I'll, I'll
take... ah, ooh...
566
00:21:26,485 --> 00:21:28,819
I'll take number...
Come on, take a number.
567
00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:30,232
Well? I'll...
568
00:21:30,256 --> 00:21:31,600
I'll go for broke
with number two.
569
00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:32,823
Go for broke?
570
00:21:32,891 --> 00:21:36,021
A very adequate
choice of words, because
571
00:21:36,045 --> 00:21:40,614
behind curtain number two, we
have 20 cases of canned squid!
572
00:21:42,518 --> 00:21:44,284
Canned squid?
573
00:21:44,353 --> 00:21:46,286
Maybe there's a mistake.
574
00:21:46,355 --> 00:21:48,000
Maybe that was
the wrong curtain.
575
00:21:48,024 --> 00:21:50,240
Canned squid?
576
00:21:50,310 --> 00:21:51,742
But wait a moment.
577
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:53,422
You'll notice this
beautiful young lady
578
00:21:53,446 --> 00:21:56,880
has just brought forth
one can of canned squid.
579
00:21:56,949 --> 00:21:58,494
And on this can,
there's a little note,
580
00:21:58,518 --> 00:22:00,028
and in the note,
there's a message.
581
00:22:00,052 --> 00:22:01,630
And what could that message be?
582
00:22:01,654 --> 00:22:02,964
This is the big one.
This is the big one.
583
00:22:02,988 --> 00:22:04,922
It'll be a trip to Europe.
All right, come on.
584
00:22:04,990 --> 00:22:07,591
All right now, do you
want to keep your squid
585
00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:09,971
and the message
that's contained herein...
586
00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:11,473
Mm-hmm. But if you don't,
587
00:22:11,497 --> 00:22:14,565
I'll give you back your
$800 and a 200-dollar bonus,
588
00:22:14,634 --> 00:22:16,545
and then you'll
have $1,000 in cash.
589
00:22:16,569 --> 00:22:17,930
What do you want
to do? Keep the squid.
590
00:22:17,954 --> 00:22:19,987
Who are you, Jacques Cousteau?
591
00:22:20,056 --> 00:22:20,988
Take the money.
592
00:22:21,057 --> 00:22:22,522
No, no, keep the squid!
593
00:22:22,591 --> 00:22:23,902
This is a trick,
this is a trick!
594
00:22:23,926 --> 00:22:25,092
I'll take the money.
595
00:22:25,178 --> 00:22:26,821
The money? Yes.
596
00:22:26,845 --> 00:22:28,690
Ah, you're not going
to take the squid? No.
597
00:22:28,714 --> 00:22:30,759
All right, you have the
one thousand dollars, right?
598
00:22:30,783 --> 00:22:31,715
Yes. Okay.
599
00:22:31,784 --> 00:22:33,094
Here is your $1,000. Yes.
600
00:22:33,118 --> 00:22:34,663
Now, I'm going to show
you what you turned down
601
00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:36,665
when you turned down the squid.
602
00:22:36,689 --> 00:22:38,283
The message says...
Are you ready for this?
603
00:22:38,307 --> 00:22:40,185
Yes. "If you'd have
kept this squid,
604
00:22:40,209 --> 00:22:43,376
I would have owed you
one more can of squid.
605
00:22:43,445 --> 00:22:45,996
We did it...
606
00:22:49,301 --> 00:22:51,046
You can see how
happy the boys are.
607
00:22:51,070 --> 00:22:52,948
And why not? They have $1,000.
608
00:22:52,972 --> 00:22:54,252
One thousand dollars.
609
00:22:54,306 --> 00:22:57,107
But that's not the reason
why Oscar is smiling.
610
00:22:57,160 --> 00:23:00,444
Why am I smiling?
611
00:23:00,496 --> 00:23:04,965
You see, friends, I've known
Oscar Madison for many, many years,
612
00:23:05,034 --> 00:23:07,968
and we sort of stretched
things just a little bit to allow him
613
00:23:08,037 --> 00:23:10,232
to participate in the show
and win all the money,
614
00:23:10,256 --> 00:23:12,689
but as the rules clearly say
615
00:23:12,759 --> 00:23:16,961
that no friends or relatives can play
and win money on Let's Make A Deal,
616
00:23:17,029 --> 00:23:21,132
I just know what Felix and Oscar
want to do with their winnings today.
617
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:22,733
What?
618
00:23:22,802 --> 00:23:26,270
Felix and Oscar would like to
donate the one thousand dollars
619
00:23:26,338 --> 00:23:27,938
to their favorite orphanage.
620
00:23:28,007 --> 00:23:29,089
No! No!
621
00:23:29,158 --> 00:23:30,636
I'll make a deal
with the orphanage!
622
00:23:30,660 --> 00:23:32,070
Felix! No, of
course, I'm kidding.
623
00:23:32,094 --> 00:23:34,106
You know that I'm kidding.
I'm an orphan myself.
624
00:23:34,130 --> 00:23:36,030
Hi, Mom!
625
00:23:37,199 --> 00:23:39,159
Orphans come to
our house for dinner.
626
00:23:48,377 --> 00:23:51,912
Okay, chow call, gentlemen.
627
00:23:51,981 --> 00:23:53,959
You know, that
is a beautiful bed.
628
00:23:53,983 --> 00:23:55,526
Yeah, Felix laid out the money.
629
00:23:55,550 --> 00:23:58,063
I have to pay him back five
dollars a month... forever.
630
00:23:58,087 --> 00:24:00,416
Okay, each of you will find on
your place something very special.
631
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:02,017
What do you see,
Oscar? A carrot.
632
00:24:02,041 --> 00:24:03,502
And Monty, what do
you see on your plate?
633
00:24:03,526 --> 00:24:05,009
One potato chip.
634
00:24:05,061 --> 00:24:06,860
Okay, let's make a deal!
635
00:24:06,946 --> 00:24:08,924
Pick me, pick me, pick me!
636
00:24:08,948 --> 00:24:10,280
All right, I'll pick you.
637
00:24:10,349 --> 00:24:12,461
Now, I'll tell you what I'll
trade you for your carrot.
638
00:24:12,485 --> 00:24:13,750
You can have plate number one,
639
00:24:13,819 --> 00:24:15,464
plate number two or
plate number three.
640
00:24:15,488 --> 00:24:17,054
What will it be?
641
00:24:17,123 --> 00:24:18,800
Come on! Hey, come on!
642
00:24:18,824 --> 00:24:20,635
I'll have plate number one.
643
00:24:20,659 --> 00:24:21,970
Plate number one, and
let's see what Oscar's
644
00:24:21,994 --> 00:24:23,472
plate number one...
A beautiful steak! Ooh!
645
00:24:23,496 --> 00:24:24,807
Oh... In exchange for
646
00:24:24,831 --> 00:24:26,229
his carrot. Thank you.
647
00:24:26,299 --> 00:24:27,776
All right. Now me,
now me, now me!
648
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:29,110
Yes, yes. Now it's my turn.
649
00:24:29,134 --> 00:24:30,567
All right, for your potato chip,
650
00:24:30,636 --> 00:24:31,980
What am I gonna have? you
can have either plate number two
651
00:24:32,004 --> 00:24:32,936
or plate number three.
Take two, take two.
652
00:24:33,005 --> 00:24:33,904
Two, two, two, two, two, two.
653
00:24:33,973 --> 00:24:35,651
Take two. Two.
654
00:24:35,675 --> 00:24:37,107
Two it is for
Monty, which leaves
655
00:24:37,176 --> 00:24:39,136
plate number
three for lucky Felix.
656
00:24:39,178 --> 00:24:41,578
Let's just see what Felix
is going to get. A beautiful
657
00:24:41,647 --> 00:24:43,791
steak for Felix And
now mine, mine, mine.
658
00:24:43,815 --> 00:24:45,081
In exchange for his coleslaw.
659
00:24:45,151 --> 00:24:46,461
All right! And now here is
660
00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:49,536
plate number two for Monty.
Right, right, a very nice,
661
00:24:49,605 --> 00:24:51,671
juicy... Canned squid.
45315
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