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1
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Previously...
2
00:00:01,460 --> 00:00:03,629
Why do you always
have to go to extremes?
3
00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:06,547
First it was taunting Casey
and then breaking Rusty's nose.
4
00:00:06,715 --> 00:00:08,801
And then, rubbing a townie
in Frannie's face.
5
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:11,260
- You're leaving.
- It's just one month.
6
00:00:11,428 --> 00:00:13,304
- I love you.
- I love you.
7
00:00:13,755 --> 00:00:14,852
I'm with Max.
8
00:00:14,977 --> 00:00:17,017
Why can't you find someone else
is perfect for you?
9
00:00:17,226 --> 00:00:19,268
Because no other girl in the world
compares to you.
10
00:00:19,436 --> 00:00:20,857
- It's old habits.
- Old habits
11
00:00:20,982 --> 00:00:23,356
like having a great time together.
What does that tell you?
12
00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:26,317
- It tells me that we can't be friends.
- See you around.
13
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:31,113
I'm sorry for the douche move.
I knew you wanted her first
14
00:00:31,281 --> 00:00:32,561
and I made my move anyway.
15
00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:36,452
Last night,
under the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel
16
00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:37,703
I fell for you.
17
00:00:45,065 --> 00:00:46,850
What do you think about this one?
18
00:00:47,213 --> 00:00:49,467
For dinner with Jordan
or Desert Storm?
19
00:00:51,358 --> 00:00:52,445
Crap.
20
00:00:52,761 --> 00:00:56,085
Why are you sweating this date?
You ve been together for a week already.
21
00:00:56,210 --> 00:00:58,557
I'm sure she knows by now
you can't dress yourself.
22
00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:01,236
This is different.
This isn't just hanging out.
23
00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:02,681
This is a real date.
24
00:01:03,763 --> 00:01:04,903
At a restaurant.
25
00:01:05,616 --> 00:01:06,988
With reservations.
26
00:01:08,194 --> 00:01:10,554
I even borrowed Casey's car.
Hey, is this still stylish?
27
00:01:10,679 --> 00:01:11,757
Was it ever?
28
00:01:11,882 --> 00:01:14,739
She just got out of a relationship
with Andy, who dresses like a pop star.
29
00:01:14,909 --> 00:01:17,302
And now she's dating me.
So I gotta step it up.
30
00:01:22,342 --> 00:01:25,088
The crucial first real date.
Always awkward.
31
00:01:25,518 --> 00:01:27,654
You know,
I usually take the band-aid approach.
32
00:01:27,779 --> 00:01:29,632
Rip the damn thing off,
33
00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:31,654
let the scab heal,
and move on to the next one.
34
00:01:31,779 --> 00:01:34,608
It's gonna be intimate.
Candlelit. Amazing.
35
00:01:34,824 --> 00:01:35,936
And scab-free.
36
00:01:36,061 --> 00:01:38,380
And if everything goes well,
you can stay at Jordan's
37
00:01:38,505 --> 00:01:41,600
- and I can sleep in your room tonight.
- Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
38
00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:44,908
I thought things quieted down since
Griffin and his girlfriend broke up.
39
00:01:45,033 --> 00:01:47,800
They did. But Griffin's getting
over his heartbreak
40
00:01:47,925 --> 00:01:50,090
with a steady rotation of Tri-Pis.
41
00:01:50,721 --> 00:01:53,404
You have no idea
how much those girls love dirty talk.
42
00:01:53,573 --> 00:01:55,025
Now instead of living in a porno,
43
00:01:55,150 --> 00:01:57,555
t's like I'm listening
to the director's audio commentary.
44
00:01:58,201 --> 00:02:00,248
If you need it,
Dale's at a barn-raising this weekend
45
00:02:00,373 --> 00:02:02,037
trying to convert some Amish people
46
00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:03,388
so his bed's open.
47
00:02:04,011 --> 00:02:05,866
Yeah, the futon's OK.
48
00:02:08,253 --> 00:02:09,670
- That one's not bad.
- Really?
49
00:02:10,177 --> 00:02:11,213
Not bad, as in:
50
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:14,759
"I'm so happy this guy
is my amazing new boyfriend", not bad?
51
00:02:14,927 --> 00:02:15,839
Exactly.
52
00:02:17,489 --> 00:02:18,514
It's Dale's.
53
00:02:21,707 --> 00:02:23,271
Really shows it off, right?
54
00:02:25,417 --> 00:02:27,322
You might want to wear a jacket.
55
00:02:33,257 --> 00:02:35,836
You know, I have to say,
as weird as it is to be the one
56
00:02:35,961 --> 00:02:38,468
who's not going out tonight,
watching the "getting ready" routine
57
00:02:38,593 --> 00:02:40,743
from this point of view
is quite interesting.
58
00:02:40,912 --> 00:02:44,061
Where's my sculpting gel?
Jenny, you're a fricking klepto!
59
00:02:44,186 --> 00:02:45,490
And a little scary.
60
00:02:46,204 --> 00:02:47,636
You know you love it.
61
00:02:49,644 --> 00:02:51,545
You sure you don't want
to come out with me?
62
00:02:51,713 --> 00:02:55,132
We're gonna go see some movie
called 9 1/2 Weeks at the Titan.
63
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:57,716
And be the third wheel
to a soft-core porn trip to the movies?
64
00:02:57,841 --> 00:02:59,512
Thanks, but not my style, Ash.
65
00:02:59,775 --> 00:03:01,690
Bye, Jessicas!
Don't drink too much.
66
00:03:03,036 --> 00:03:04,128
Are you sure?
67
00:03:04,253 --> 00:03:06,560
Cause I hate the thought
of you spending another night alone.
68
00:03:06,729 --> 00:03:09,540
No way. Since Max's been gone,
I've gotten so much done.
69
00:03:09,665 --> 00:03:12,733
Cleaning, organizing. I'm thinking
about taking up an instrument.
70
00:03:12,902 --> 00:03:16,509
Besides, Max is gonna call me any minute
and then it's going to be two hours
71
00:03:16,768 --> 00:03:18,405
of catching-up talk, followed by...
72
00:03:18,752 --> 00:03:21,533
gross-when-it's-other-people
but-cute-when-it's-you phone smooching.
73
00:03:22,227 --> 00:03:24,330
Melinda, Hilary.
Remember, sex isn't love!
74
00:03:25,541 --> 00:03:27,176
All right, if you say so.
75
00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:42,714
Well that sucks.
76
00:03:42,839 --> 00:03:44,798
"OK. Love you."
77
00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:57,044
Don't you just love long,
scalding hot showers,
78
00:03:57,169 --> 00:03:58,487
they're so invigorating!
79
00:03:58,830 --> 00:03:59,830
Totally.
80
00:04:00,516 --> 00:04:02,908
So, Betsy,
what are you up to tonight?
81
00:04:03,077 --> 00:04:05,767
I'm just going out to dinner with Vince.
What about you?
82
00:04:06,639 --> 00:04:07,638
I don't know.
83
00:04:08,291 --> 00:04:11,332
I guess I might just hang out
at the house. Watch TV or something.
84
00:04:11,457 --> 00:04:13,836
Really? Do they still have television
on Friday nights?
85
00:04:14,331 --> 00:04:15,331
I think so.
86
00:04:22,007 --> 00:04:23,429
Do you want to join us?
87
00:04:27,017 --> 00:04:31,020
-=Greek 220=-
"Isn't It Bro-mantic"
88
00:04:31,188 --> 00:04:33,400
Timing: Kappa Team
89
00:04:41,545 --> 00:04:43,616
- Yeah, how're you doing?
- Good.
90
00:04:44,641 --> 00:04:46,636
This is a really nice restaurant.
91
00:04:46,761 --> 00:04:49,608
I know, they have reservations
and everything.
92
00:04:50,256 --> 00:04:52,249
I told you our first date
was going to be special.
93
00:04:52,825 --> 00:04:56,325
I thought you meant we'd sneak wine
coolers into a movie or something.
94
00:04:56,547 --> 00:04:57,588
May I help you?
95
00:04:58,165 --> 00:05:01,634
Reservation for two, please.
Under Cartwright, Russell.
96
00:05:03,199 --> 00:05:05,552
I'm sorry, I'm not seeing
anything here, Mr. Russell.
97
00:05:06,456 --> 00:05:09,016
It's under Cartwright.
Russell's my first name.
98
00:05:09,829 --> 00:05:11,402
Then why'd you say it second?
99
00:05:12,393 --> 00:05:13,364
I was...
100
00:05:14,238 --> 00:05:15,542
just being fancy.
101
00:05:16,705 --> 00:05:19,526
We're preparing your table now,
Mr. Cartwright, Russell.
102
00:05:21,456 --> 00:05:24,291
Miss? Can you make sure
it is your finest table?
103
00:05:24,867 --> 00:05:26,366
It's the only table we have left.
104
00:05:26,645 --> 00:05:27,645
Wonderful.
105
00:05:29,015 --> 00:05:30,958
Rusty, this is so sweet.
Thank you.
106
00:05:31,083 --> 00:05:32,371
It's just you and me,
107
00:05:32,740 --> 00:05:35,308
and the romantic ambiance...
108
00:05:37,492 --> 00:05:38,646
and my sister.
109
00:05:40,087 --> 00:05:42,383
Isn't that one of our pledges?
110
00:05:55,627 --> 00:05:56,981
So hot, man. So hot.
111
00:05:58,942 --> 00:06:01,272
You're missing quite
the story in there.
112
00:06:01,397 --> 00:06:02,625
Griff's Tri-Pi
113
00:06:03,111 --> 00:06:05,364
broke out a leather riding crop.
114
00:06:05,533 --> 00:06:06,936
The riding crop.
115
00:06:07,061 --> 00:06:08,511
I remember it well.
116
00:06:08,636 --> 00:06:11,870
It was after the role playing,
but before the toe sucking.
117
00:06:12,038 --> 00:06:13,052
Good times.
118
00:06:15,438 --> 00:06:18,689
I don't know
why he wants to be a dermatologist
119
00:06:18,814 --> 00:06:22,297
because he obviously has
such a jump start on gynecology.
120
00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:25,676
Stop by around 3:00 this morning
and ask him. I'm sure we'll be up.
121
00:06:28,102 --> 00:06:29,638
You know, I gotta run right now,
122
00:06:29,806 --> 00:06:31,802
but listen, maybe later
123
00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:34,685
we'll reopen that roommate request
you'd asked about.
124
00:06:34,974 --> 00:06:36,322
Yeah, Ev. That'd be great.
125
00:06:41,378 --> 00:06:42,642
Hang in there, man.
126
00:06:45,779 --> 00:06:49,241
- Mind if I crash your study spot?
- Yeah, Grant. Pull up a chair.
127
00:06:50,790 --> 00:06:53,963
That is, if you don't mind studying
in the middle of a bachelor party.
128
00:06:54,582 --> 00:06:55,914
It must get tedious for you,
129
00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:58,696
to listen to those hook up stories
from all the brothers.
130
00:06:59,331 --> 00:07:02,105
Whatever. It's like watching
an episode of Entourage.
131
00:07:02,497 --> 00:07:03,497
Except cheaper.
132
00:07:03,922 --> 00:07:05,174
And actually watchable.
133
00:07:06,809 --> 00:07:08,427
But you don't feel isolated?
134
00:07:09,185 --> 00:07:10,765
Sometimes, but...
135
00:07:10,890 --> 00:07:13,389
it's a cross I have to bear
being the only gay guy at Omega Chi.
136
00:07:13,685 --> 00:07:15,016
Not necessarily...
137
00:07:18,647 --> 00:07:19,540
Marco?
138
00:07:20,398 --> 00:07:22,885
I so knew that Men's Fitnesssubscription
had nothing to do
139
00:07:23,010 --> 00:07:24,943
- with his flabby calves.
- Not Marco.
140
00:07:27,607 --> 00:07:28,499
Pierre?
141
00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:30,720
I thought he was just really French.
142
00:07:34,129 --> 00:07:34,912
You?
143
00:07:36,128 --> 00:07:37,128
There it is.
144
00:07:38,879 --> 00:07:40,666
Does anyone else in the house know?
145
00:07:40,836 --> 00:07:43,087
No, just you.
I've told a few friends from back home.
146
00:07:43,255 --> 00:07:46,242
But I'm just not ready
to announce it to the world yet.
147
00:07:48,927 --> 00:07:50,028
That's great, man.
148
00:07:51,460 --> 00:07:52,721
I don't know what to say.
149
00:07:53,885 --> 00:07:55,048
Welcome to gay.
150
00:07:57,114 --> 00:07:58,258
I hope I'm ready.
151
00:07:58,884 --> 00:08:00,619
- Who's your favorite singer?
- Britney.
152
00:08:00,744 --> 00:08:02,022
- Movie?
- Hairspray?
153
00:08:02,191 --> 00:08:03,409
Fashion designer?
154
00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:06,819
Too slow. Thanks for playing.
155
00:08:07,329 --> 00:08:10,377
No, but two out of three
on your GaySaTs? You'll be fine.
156
00:08:14,870 --> 00:08:16,325
It's so crowded in here.
157
00:08:16,450 --> 00:08:18,882
I called for these reservations
a couple of hours
158
00:08:19,007 --> 00:08:20,916
after our Art History midterm.
159
00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:22,139
That's great.
160
00:08:22,952 --> 00:08:23,871
I love it.
161
00:08:25,222 --> 00:08:26,451
I'm so glad that...
162
00:08:27,829 --> 00:08:28,700
Sorry!
163
00:08:30,018 --> 00:08:31,247
Nothing to see there.
164
00:08:31,522 --> 00:08:33,132
Please enjoy your night.
165
00:08:40,615 --> 00:08:42,146
How long have you been together now?
166
00:08:42,705 --> 00:08:44,882
Six months last Tuesday!
167
00:08:45,007 --> 00:08:46,786
That's great.
I'm proud of you two.
168
00:08:46,911 --> 00:08:50,014
It must make not drinking a lot easier
when you have a partner who's an alco...
169
00:08:50,464 --> 00:08:51,565
not drinking.
170
00:08:51,991 --> 00:08:53,789
Vince had to give his chip back.
171
00:08:53,914 --> 00:08:55,117
I said I was sorry.
172
00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:58,745
He went to a CRU game last week
and ran into his old friend, Mr. Vodka.
173
00:08:59,039 --> 00:09:01,482
But it's fine.
It's fine, really!
174
00:09:02,541 --> 00:09:03,333
It's fine.
175
00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:06,716
- Would you look at all these salads.
- You know what's a funny word?
176
00:09:07,203 --> 00:09:10,424
- Radicchio.
- Well, everybody makes mistakes.
177
00:09:10,974 --> 00:09:12,551
See? She gets it.
Why can't you?
178
00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:14,720
Radicchio is a funny word.
179
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,931
Let's not talk about it, OK?
It's called Anonymous for a reason.
180
00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:20,174
You didn't have a problem
blabbing to my mom about it.
181
00:09:20,299 --> 00:09:22,728
I never said anything
about you being drunk.
182
00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:25,647
She asked where you were
and I said, "Asleep in the bushes."
183
00:09:27,914 --> 00:09:29,109
You guys, let's order.
184
00:09:29,435 --> 00:09:31,002
Let me start with our specials.
185
00:09:31,127 --> 00:09:33,238
We have a Penne ala Vodka.
186
00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:34,608
That sounds good.
187
00:09:34,733 --> 00:09:36,158
You are never gonna change!
188
00:09:43,548 --> 00:09:44,840
- I gotta...
- Go.
189
00:09:49,871 --> 00:09:52,216
So... can I start you off
with an appetizer?
190
00:09:57,347 --> 00:09:58,418
That was bad.
191
00:09:59,078 --> 00:10:01,069
It's OK, Casey.
It wasn't your fault.
192
00:10:01,194 --> 00:10:02,546
No, they just left.
193
00:10:03,009 --> 00:10:04,321
They were my ride.
194
00:10:07,196 --> 00:10:09,275
- We can give you a ride.
- Really?
195
00:10:09,775 --> 00:10:12,112
- That's so sweet.
- But we haven't ordered yet.
196
00:10:13,090 --> 00:10:14,362
It might be awhile.
197
00:10:14,532 --> 00:10:15,906
That's OK, neither have I.
198
00:10:16,196 --> 00:10:18,762
Have you seen how many salads
they have on the menu?
199
00:10:18,887 --> 00:10:19,944
I can't decide!
200
00:10:20,069 --> 00:10:23,944
Maybe we could order a few different
ones and then we can all share?
201
00:10:27,709 --> 00:10:28,840
Alice, right?
202
00:10:29,927 --> 00:10:31,964
You were in my Econ class
last semester.
203
00:10:33,705 --> 00:10:35,155
It's been a while.
204
00:10:35,705 --> 00:10:37,089
- Kha'y.
- Kha'y.
205
00:10:37,919 --> 00:10:39,469
It's good to see you.
206
00:10:44,108 --> 00:10:45,271
Amphoras!
207
00:10:45,557 --> 00:10:46,547
Kha'y!
208
00:10:47,272 --> 00:10:48,801
I'm pleased to say that the Alumni
209
00:10:48,926 --> 00:10:51,706
and I have been impressed
with each and every one of...
210
00:10:53,048 --> 00:10:53,901
you.
211
00:10:55,251 --> 00:10:57,259
Tonight we give you your final task
212
00:10:57,384 --> 00:11:00,135
before we leave you to make
of the Society what you will.
213
00:11:00,260 --> 00:11:02,619
It is a Rite of Passage.
It is a task of critic...
214
00:11:03,733 --> 00:11:05,433
- Grand Master Bowman?
- Mr. Cappie,
215
00:11:05,558 --> 00:11:08,583
does this question pertain
to the Amphora Society?
216
00:11:09,302 --> 00:11:11,837
Is it relevant
to our centuries-old tradition,
217
00:11:12,015 --> 00:11:14,047
and not just something
about a society mascot,
218
00:11:14,218 --> 00:11:17,580
or if Joshua Jackson
and/or Paul Walker
219
00:11:17,705 --> 00:11:19,177
will be speaking to the group?
220
00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:22,139
Yes, sir. The first one.
The centuries-old tradition one.
221
00:11:25,053 --> 00:11:27,236
- What's your question?
- Thank you very much, sir.
222
00:11:27,913 --> 00:11:29,183
I was wondering...
223
00:11:29,308 --> 00:11:31,690
Is there a secret dry cleaner
for these robes?
224
00:11:32,308 --> 00:11:33,682
Just because, you know,
225
00:11:33,807 --> 00:11:36,623
I don't really wanna get
that out there in the...
226
00:11:36,844 --> 00:11:39,948
in the general public. Plus,
they do such a good job there at the...
227
00:11:40,666 --> 00:11:42,282
cleaners.
So, I was wondering, did...
228
00:11:42,407 --> 00:11:44,413
if you know of a place?
229
00:11:50,467 --> 00:11:52,650
You are the most...
230
00:11:53,910 --> 00:11:57,123
accomplished,
and promising students at CRU...
231
00:12:02,436 --> 00:12:05,432
Believe me, if I could shoot myself
a quizzical look, I would right now.
232
00:12:06,164 --> 00:12:08,522
But tomorrow night,
we will ask you to tell us
233
00:12:08,647 --> 00:12:11,146
about the people
behind those impressive resumes
234
00:12:11,793 --> 00:12:15,776
by performing the traditional
Amphora Emotional Purge.
235
00:12:15,945 --> 00:12:18,862
In an effort to strip away
the psychological masks
236
00:12:19,031 --> 00:12:21,239
and safeguards that would prevent
237
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:24,159
your fellow Amphoras
from knowing your true selves,
238
00:12:24,576 --> 00:12:26,828
you will stand before us
and reveal everything.
239
00:12:26,953 --> 00:12:28,601
- Naked party.
- Your disappointments,
240
00:12:28,726 --> 00:12:30,082
your mistakes,
241
00:12:30,251 --> 00:12:32,632
your embarrassments,
your worst secrets
242
00:12:33,592 --> 00:12:36,963
and your most agonizing
emotional heartaches.
243
00:12:38,604 --> 00:12:40,352
Be prepared. We'll see you then.
244
00:12:43,909 --> 00:12:47,358
It sounds like we're about to get
to know each other really fast.
245
00:12:47,483 --> 00:12:50,022
I guess it comes
with a secret society.
246
00:12:50,545 --> 00:12:53,271
Know what else comes
with a secret society? Me.
247
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,817
Hi, I'm Cappie. Don't tell anybody.
It's a secret.
248
00:13:01,525 --> 00:13:04,908
If I would've known she'll be here,
I'd have suggested roller skating.
249
00:13:05,469 --> 00:13:07,261
Well, for future reference,
you should know
250
00:13:07,386 --> 00:13:09,999
I'm wicked at skee-ball
and ass at air hockey.
251
00:13:12,838 --> 00:13:14,681
Despite everything, I still had fun.
252
00:13:15,064 --> 00:13:15,881
Really?
253
00:13:16,254 --> 00:13:18,129
Yeah. I was with you.
254
00:13:21,052 --> 00:13:22,092
You're so great.
255
00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:31,830
I'm so sorry! I slipped.
256
00:13:32,967 --> 00:13:34,279
Please. Go back to...
257
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,073
You know.
258
00:13:41,653 --> 00:13:44,357
- Oh, my god.
- See you tomorrow.
259
00:14:01,483 --> 00:14:03,566
I'm not sure Jordan liked the movie.
260
00:14:05,368 --> 00:14:07,471
You couldn't just taken a cab home
from the restaurant?
261
00:14:07,882 --> 00:14:10,584
- But this is my car.
- It was the worst first date ever.
262
00:14:10,972 --> 00:14:14,056
First dates are always terrible.
I treat them like a band-aid and...
263
00:14:14,181 --> 00:14:16,348
Rip them off.
Yeah, I know. I get it.
264
00:14:17,257 --> 00:14:18,268
Let's just go.
265
00:14:19,441 --> 00:14:22,277
You know, it's still pretty early.
You want to go bowling or something?
266
00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:23,904
Are you being serious right now?
267
00:14:25,958 --> 00:14:27,388
- Dobler's?
- Let's go.
268
00:14:33,255 --> 00:14:34,784
Are you mad at me or something?
269
00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:42,087
Oh my God, have you seen
this movie 9 1/2 Weeks?
270
00:14:43,105 --> 00:14:46,667
So there's this scene where the mom
from 8 Mile strips to this song...
271
00:14:47,681 --> 00:14:50,339
I think I've just reached my threshold.
Sorry, Ash,
272
00:14:50,844 --> 00:14:52,922
I can't stomach any more
straight sex stories.
273
00:14:53,275 --> 00:14:54,092
Right.
274
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,178
Griffin. Sorry.
275
00:14:57,041 --> 00:14:58,493
So tell me about your night.
276
00:14:59,127 --> 00:15:00,675
You know, nothing too exciting.
277
00:15:01,265 --> 00:15:03,763
Hung out at the house,
studied a little bit,
278
00:15:03,888 --> 00:15:07,129
- and a brother secretly came out to me.
- Was it Marco?
279
00:15:07,642 --> 00:15:11,036
Oh my God, 'cause he's my pick in our
"Next to Come Out at Omega Chi" pool.
280
00:15:11,625 --> 00:15:13,808
- His nails are nicer than mine.
- I'm not telling you.
281
00:15:13,933 --> 00:15:17,017
Because you're the one who outed me. And
every time you out a guy to his house,
282
00:15:17,142 --> 00:15:19,819
- a fairy loses its wings.
- No! Come on, you have to tell me.
283
00:15:19,944 --> 00:15:21,331
- I learned my lesson.
- Nope.
284
00:15:21,456 --> 00:15:22,675
Tell me please.
285
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,515
- Tell me, I'm dying.
- All right, fine.
286
00:15:25,108 --> 00:15:26,124
It's not Marco.
287
00:15:27,798 --> 00:15:29,478
- It's Grant.
- What?
288
00:15:29,846 --> 00:15:31,930
- Yeah.
- It's always the hot ones.
289
00:15:33,427 --> 00:15:34,945
Anything happen after that?
290
00:15:35,070 --> 00:15:37,251
What? Because we're both gay,
we have to hook up?
291
00:15:37,376 --> 00:15:39,520
No. Because Grant's awesome. And...
292
00:15:40,208 --> 00:15:41,984
You guys would make
the cutest couple.
293
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:44,869
Well,
Grant does have a few of the...
294
00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:49,465
OK, all the qualities I look for
in a prospective boyfriend.
295
00:15:49,590 --> 00:15:52,242
But you know what they say,
you can't have gay sex where you eat.
296
00:15:52,973 --> 00:15:54,770
Then don't screw around
in the kitchen.
297
00:15:55,246 --> 00:15:57,888
Not gonna happen. He hasn't come out
to the rest of the house.
298
00:15:58,013 --> 00:16:00,041
Why not? Omega Chi is fine
with you being gay.
299
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:02,460
Yeah, one gay.
I mean, two of us hooking up?
300
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:05,468
That's when they have to start worrying
about having next year's Rush underneath
301
00:16:05,593 --> 00:16:06,781
a rainbow banner.
302
00:16:07,025 --> 00:16:08,425
Stop making excuses.
303
00:16:08,593 --> 00:16:11,559
Fisher and I were worried about
how ZBZ would handle our relationship.
304
00:16:11,684 --> 00:16:14,680
But we came out to everyone
and now everything's great.
305
00:16:14,805 --> 00:16:16,514
Yeah,
This isn't really the same thing.
306
00:16:16,639 --> 00:16:19,850
Fine, don't go after the hot guy
you have tons in common with.
307
00:16:19,975 --> 00:16:21,849
Your loss. And his.
308
00:16:34,623 --> 00:16:36,030
- Hi!
- Hey, Case.
309
00:16:37,073 --> 00:16:40,311
You want me to call Jordan over?
You can ruin breakfast for us, too.
310
00:16:41,209 --> 00:16:44,561
OK, so maybe your first date
wasn't the best date ever,
311
00:16:44,916 --> 00:16:46,482
but from where I was sitting
312
00:16:46,891 --> 00:16:48,500
it looked pretty romantic.
313
00:16:49,483 --> 00:16:52,216
And where you were sitting
was very, very close.
314
00:16:53,061 --> 00:16:54,447
You can't be mad at me.
315
00:16:55,616 --> 00:16:58,279
No, I love having my sister
go on dates with me.
316
00:16:58,643 --> 00:17:00,110
It's not that big of a deal!
317
00:17:01,652 --> 00:17:03,229
Remember when Charlie Adams
318
00:17:03,397 --> 00:17:06,399
took you to see Planet of the Apes
with Mark Wahlberg
319
00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:10,135
and I begged Mom to make you take me
because I wanted to see it so badly?
320
00:17:10,955 --> 00:17:13,990
- No! It's not the same...
- Yes. The only thing different,
321
00:17:14,158 --> 00:17:17,162
is that you didn't get yourself
sick on Sno-Caps and Mr. Pibb.
322
00:17:21,514 --> 00:17:23,083
I'm so sorry, Rusty.
323
00:17:24,998 --> 00:17:25,894
It's fine.
324
00:17:29,322 --> 00:17:31,365
You've got to let me
make it up to you.
325
00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:33,677
How about
a fun brother-sister mall day?
326
00:17:33,845 --> 00:17:36,147
We could have lunch, shop,
327
00:17:36,272 --> 00:17:38,738
I can help you pick out some
new shirts that are a little more...
328
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:42,477
... of the same
because your shirts are so handsome!
329
00:17:43,863 --> 00:17:45,105
What do you say?
330
00:17:46,089 --> 00:17:48,502
I gotta meet Jordan
for coffee in a little bit
331
00:17:48,627 --> 00:17:50,485
and I've got stuff to do
at the house all day.
332
00:17:54,037 --> 00:17:55,361
What about Sunday?
333
00:17:59,044 --> 00:17:59,785
Yeah.
334
00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:00,965
Maybe.
335
00:18:01,756 --> 00:18:03,142
What about brunch?
336
00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:05,261
Great!
337
00:18:05,906 --> 00:18:07,982
- Sounds like a plan.
- Great. I'll call you.
338
00:18:11,913 --> 00:18:14,685
"I'll call you." Great, brunch.
339
00:18:20,455 --> 00:18:21,963
Alice in Wonderland.
340
00:18:22,088 --> 00:18:23,522
- Cappie, hi.
- Hello.
341
00:18:23,895 --> 00:18:27,528
You ready for tonight? Have you taken
full inventory of your scarred psyche?
342
00:18:28,065 --> 00:18:30,324
I just had a conference call
with all my therapists,
343
00:18:30,449 --> 00:18:32,121
even the one from when I was five.
344
00:18:32,246 --> 00:18:34,946
And apparently,
I used to cheat at Candyland!
345
00:18:35,575 --> 00:18:36,785
Kinda damaging.
346
00:18:37,994 --> 00:18:40,137
- What's going on, guys?
- Evan, hi!
347
00:18:40,262 --> 00:18:43,183
Cappie and I were discussing
tonight's Emotional Purge.
348
00:18:43,308 --> 00:18:45,458
That's funny... But listen,
349
00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:48,806
I don't think the three of us should be
standing around like this in public.
350
00:18:48,931 --> 00:18:52,313
Because The Amphoras have a big presence
in the Defense Department.
351
00:18:52,438 --> 00:18:55,025
So a missile... could just,
you know...
352
00:18:55,616 --> 00:18:57,844
come on and hit us at any moment.
353
00:18:59,115 --> 00:18:59,964
Just...
354
00:19:02,516 --> 00:19:05,101
So, Evan, have you thought about
what you're gonna say tonight?
355
00:19:05,765 --> 00:19:08,537
I'm not sure
if I trust everyone in the group
356
00:19:08,662 --> 00:19:10,978
with my deepest,
darkest secrets, so...
357
00:19:11,451 --> 00:19:14,152
We're all feeling that.
I'm sure you'll be great.
358
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,539
And I'm officially late
for student government.
359
00:19:16,664 --> 00:19:18,686
But I'll see you guys later tonight!
360
00:19:21,321 --> 00:19:23,881
- You not find me trustworthy?
- You find that surprising?
361
00:19:24,006 --> 00:19:26,623
What makes you think I'm gonna
purge secrets to Evan Chambers?
362
00:19:26,791 --> 00:19:29,472
Why do you feel the need to call me
by my full name every time we talk?
363
00:19:29,597 --> 00:19:31,989
I like it. It makes you sound
like a comic book villain.
364
00:19:32,195 --> 00:19:34,422
So why don't you trust me,
Evan Chambers?
365
00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:36,746
Don't know, you just apologized
for cutting in on Casey,
366
00:19:36,871 --> 00:19:38,645
now you're doing
the same thing with Alice.
367
00:19:38,770 --> 00:19:40,681
- Is that trustworthy?
- Stop crying, Evita.
368
00:19:40,806 --> 00:19:43,918
Firstly, Alice and I were talking,
not picking out window treatments.
369
00:19:44,043 --> 00:19:46,308
And second,
you did not see her before me.
370
00:19:46,477 --> 00:19:48,937
I seem to recall
my hood being pulled off first.
371
00:19:49,550 --> 00:19:52,640
You're unbelievable, you know that?
You saw us and had to swoop in.
372
00:19:52,765 --> 00:19:55,360
- It's like a compulsion.
- Your face is like a compulsion.
373
00:19:55,528 --> 00:19:57,610
- That doesn't even make sense.
- Your face too.
374
00:19:57,735 --> 00:19:59,405
Stop acting like a child.
375
00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:01,699
Is someone projecting
his insecurities on to me?
376
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:02,958
Please, Cap.
377
00:20:03,083 --> 00:20:05,328
I have no problem competing
with you for Alice.
378
00:20:05,748 --> 00:20:07,991
She obviously prefers someone
with a little ambition.
379
00:20:08,116 --> 00:20:10,583
You know, like everyone else
in the Society except for you.
380
00:20:10,937 --> 00:20:14,128
First I'm not trustworthy
and now I'm the runt of the Society?
381
00:20:14,296 --> 00:20:16,633
Evan Chambers you dastardly menace!
382
00:20:17,679 --> 00:20:19,692
You've got me
questioning everything!
383
00:20:26,622 --> 00:20:28,334
Rusty totally blew me off.
384
00:20:29,239 --> 00:20:32,547
- I thought he asked you to brunch?
- Yeah, "brunch".
385
00:20:32,914 --> 00:20:36,031
That's like Cartwright family code for:
"I don't want to talk right now".
386
00:20:38,696 --> 00:20:40,600
- Are you going to be OK, Case?
- Uh-huh.
387
00:20:40,890 --> 00:20:43,255
Uh-huh, as in "yes,"
or uh-huh, as in,
388
00:20:43,380 --> 00:20:46,357
"keep asking me questions until
you figure out what's bothering me"?
389
00:20:46,482 --> 00:20:47,898
When did this happen?
390
00:20:48,023 --> 00:20:50,498
I've become the Rusty
and he's become the Casey?
391
00:20:50,666 --> 00:20:52,166
I think you're just lonely, Case.
392
00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:55,196
Which is what happens
when your boyfriend runs off to England
393
00:20:55,321 --> 00:20:58,233
for, like, ever,
trying to harness the sun's...
394
00:20:59,129 --> 00:21:01,426
Whatever for spacey stuff.
395
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:04,273
Long distance is hard.
Remember me with Travis?
396
00:21:04,398 --> 00:21:07,544
I was out of my mind.
I even joined the Curling team,
397
00:21:08,316 --> 00:21:10,640
until I realized it had
nothing to do with hair.
398
00:21:11,020 --> 00:21:13,120
You guys did long distance
for years.
399
00:21:13,414 --> 00:21:15,818
- Max's been gone for three weeks.
- Stop it!
400
00:21:16,442 --> 00:21:17,617
And you're not Rusty.
401
00:21:17,742 --> 00:21:20,695
You have much, much
daintier features than him!
402
00:21:22,323 --> 00:21:24,565
- Except his hands.
- You know what? You're right.
403
00:21:24,690 --> 00:21:28,644
I'm not Rusty. I have lots of friends.
I'm the Pledge Educator,
404
00:21:28,769 --> 00:21:31,353
I have, like, 20 friends I'm supposed
to be hanging out with right now.
405
00:21:31,646 --> 00:21:33,535
- It's like, my job.
- Exactly!
406
00:21:33,776 --> 00:21:35,877
Now go force those Pledges
to spend the night with you.
407
00:21:36,996 --> 00:21:38,588
I didn't mean it like that.
408
00:21:47,674 --> 00:21:48,944
- Hi.
- Hi!
409
00:21:49,899 --> 00:21:52,143
You're in a good mood.
I was worried.
410
00:21:54,666 --> 00:21:56,008
Why would you worry?
411
00:21:56,606 --> 00:21:59,206
You seemed a little flustered
at the end of our date.
412
00:21:59,331 --> 00:22:00,427
Are you kidding?
413
00:22:00,629 --> 00:22:03,613
I always have my sister and her
angry friends crash my first dates.
414
00:22:03,781 --> 00:22:05,989
It's called lowering your expectations.
You'll see
415
00:22:06,216 --> 00:22:08,242
on our second date
how much it pays off.
416
00:22:08,497 --> 00:22:12,106
OK, well, now that I know your secret,
you're really gonna have to wow me.
417
00:22:12,516 --> 00:22:13,832
It's not that original,
418
00:22:13,957 --> 00:22:16,556
but there's a bunch of bands playing
at the Union tonight. Wanna go?
419
00:22:17,531 --> 00:22:20,171
- I'd love to, but I can't.
- What? Why?
420
00:22:20,672 --> 00:22:22,255
Casey just sent a text to pledges.
421
00:22:22,380 --> 00:22:25,125
She's calling a mandatory game night
at the house.
422
00:22:27,175 --> 00:22:28,166
Come on.
423
00:22:36,283 --> 00:22:38,634
I think I've found a solution
to your roommate problem.
424
00:22:38,988 --> 00:22:40,349
You castrated Griffin?
425
00:22:40,749 --> 00:22:43,606
That probably would've been easier than
finding someone willing to live with,
426
00:22:43,731 --> 00:22:46,001
but no. I found you a new room.
427
00:22:46,198 --> 00:22:47,581
Seriously? How?
428
00:22:48,488 --> 00:22:51,139
First I talked to Trip and convinced him
since they're both Econ majors,
429
00:22:51,264 --> 00:22:53,329
it made sense for him
to move in with Benny.
430
00:22:53,497 --> 00:22:56,017
Now, Marco's had his eye
on Roosevelt's single.
431
00:22:56,297 --> 00:22:58,855
He won't shut up about
how he needs more closet space.
432
00:22:58,980 --> 00:23:00,920
The man has more shoes
than a Foot Locker outlet.
433
00:23:01,088 --> 00:23:04,698
So I talked Roosevelt into
moving in with Clyde, because,
434
00:23:04,823 --> 00:23:06,772
you know, they have
the same water polo schedule.
435
00:23:06,897 --> 00:23:08,579
I didn't know that. But, OK.
436
00:23:08,704 --> 00:23:11,105
Which left me
with Clyde's roommate Aiden.
437
00:23:11,230 --> 00:23:14,212
Who as it turns out,
not only can sleep through anything,
438
00:23:14,337 --> 00:23:17,672
but is obsessed with porn.
It was a win-win.
439
00:23:18,057 --> 00:23:21,441
And so, I'd like to present
to you, Calvin Owens,
440
00:23:21,609 --> 00:23:24,193
your sanctuary of sex-free bliss.
441
00:23:31,746 --> 00:23:34,179
It doesn't smell like wet rubber
and candle wax!
442
00:23:35,407 --> 00:23:36,883
Yeah. Anyway.
443
00:23:37,468 --> 00:23:38,961
Sorry it took so long.
444
00:23:39,471 --> 00:23:41,656
The house is a much happier place
with you around.
445
00:23:43,567 --> 00:23:45,348
Evan, this is incredible.
446
00:23:45,473 --> 00:23:47,717
I owe you big time.
What are you doing tonight?
447
00:23:47,885 --> 00:23:49,886
Are you thinking wet rubber
and candle wax?
448
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,846
Thanks anyway, I got this thing
I gotta go do. But, rain check.
449
00:23:58,306 --> 00:23:59,445
Wait a minute.
450
00:23:59,570 --> 00:24:03,547
If I'm living in Trip's old room,
that means my roommate is...
451
00:24:03,919 --> 00:24:05,450
- Hey roomie!
- Grant!
452
00:24:06,329 --> 00:24:07,570
We're roommates.
453
00:24:08,204 --> 00:24:08,997
How...
454
00:24:10,086 --> 00:24:11,032
... unexpected.
455
00:24:19,321 --> 00:24:20,712
We need to talk.
456
00:24:23,078 --> 00:24:26,130
OK, but be quick.
I'm setting up for a pledge lock-in.
457
00:24:26,298 --> 00:24:29,509
We're playing charades, and then
a Hungry Hungry Hippos marathon.
458
00:24:29,677 --> 00:24:31,062
You're doing it again.
459
00:24:31,289 --> 00:24:33,221
- Doing what?
- Ruing my date!
460
00:24:33,389 --> 00:24:35,182
I was supposed to take
Jordan out to make up
461
00:24:35,307 --> 00:24:38,149
for last night's debacle
and you're ruining it with your lock-in.
462
00:24:39,141 --> 00:24:42,154
- You've got to let her out of it.
- But attendance is mandatory.
463
00:24:42,279 --> 00:24:44,759
If I let Jordan out,
I'd have to let everyone out.
464
00:24:45,025 --> 00:24:46,950
So you could reschedule
the lock-in later...
465
00:24:47,075 --> 00:24:49,529
Or you could just have your date
another night, right?
466
00:24:49,697 --> 00:24:51,614
You owe me for ruing the last one!
467
00:24:51,782 --> 00:24:54,200
I didn't intentionally ruin it.
468
00:24:54,368 --> 00:24:56,744
Don't you have anything better
to do with your time?
469
00:24:59,001 --> 00:25:01,374
Sorry, Rus, it's already planned.
470
00:25:01,542 --> 00:25:03,737
We've ripped up all the paper
for charades and everything.
471
00:25:03,862 --> 00:25:06,754
To cancel would be like
slapping the rainforest in the face.
472
00:25:10,009 --> 00:25:12,254
So you get your fun Saturday night
and I get nothing?
473
00:25:12,379 --> 00:25:16,013
It's not about you, Rusty.
I need this lock-in for the pledges.
474
00:25:16,181 --> 00:25:18,516
You're a smart, creative guy.
475
00:25:18,684 --> 00:25:21,830
I'm sure you'll be able to figure out
something you can do tonight.
476
00:25:40,039 --> 00:25:42,739
Alice, good to see you, as always.
477
00:25:42,864 --> 00:25:44,834
You look robe-tastic.
478
00:25:45,590 --> 00:25:48,882
- Thanks, Cappie.
- "Robe-tastic." Clever.
479
00:25:49,051 --> 00:25:50,776
Thank you, Evan. Chambers.
480
00:25:52,219 --> 00:25:53,201
Amphoras!
481
00:25:53,534 --> 00:25:54,894
Kha'y!
482
00:25:55,970 --> 00:25:57,581
It's time for the purge to begin.
483
00:25:57,827 --> 00:25:59,851
Take your seats and remember,
484
00:26:00,524 --> 00:26:02,560
These walls are sacred.
485
00:26:02,728 --> 00:26:04,504
Do not hold back.
486
00:26:05,528 --> 00:26:08,070
First up is Alice.
487
00:26:16,607 --> 00:26:19,402
So, I guess
I'll start with my childhood.
488
00:26:20,225 --> 00:26:22,997
I grew up on a farm
in rural Pennsylvania.
489
00:26:24,011 --> 00:26:27,923
We always had tons of animals around
because my mom thought
490
00:26:28,048 --> 00:26:30,244
that it would teach us
about responsibility.
491
00:26:30,369 --> 00:26:34,371
And my first pet was a gerbil,
I named Miffy.
492
00:26:35,018 --> 00:26:37,639
And I used to love to play this game
493
00:26:37,764 --> 00:26:40,613
where I'd just spin her around.
494
00:26:41,445 --> 00:26:43,432
I called it Swing The Gerbil.
495
00:26:45,074 --> 00:26:46,516
But one day, I...
496
00:26:47,192 --> 00:26:49,098
... lost control and...
497
00:26:50,923 --> 00:26:53,221
Well I...
I can still hear the crunch.
498
00:26:54,853 --> 00:26:55,647
Sorry.
499
00:26:57,957 --> 00:27:00,534
I also had a pet mouse,
I named Elphaba
500
00:27:00,702 --> 00:27:04,357
who I took everywhere
with me in my back pocket.
501
00:27:04,592 --> 00:27:08,064
But unfortunately,
my mom also thought
502
00:27:08,507 --> 00:27:10,542
having me do my own laundry
503
00:27:11,359 --> 00:27:13,047
would teach me responsibility
504
00:27:13,508 --> 00:27:14,900
and... well,
505
00:27:15,720 --> 00:27:17,739
Elphaba couldn't really swim.
506
00:27:18,010 --> 00:27:19,722
And since I was having
507
00:27:20,271 --> 00:27:23,198
such bad luck with smaller animals,
508
00:27:23,323 --> 00:27:26,312
my mother thought
that she'd bring home something bigger.
509
00:27:26,801 --> 00:27:29,195
And that's
when she brought home Toto.
510
00:27:29,502 --> 00:27:30,943
God, I hope Toto was a horse.
511
00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:33,638
I loved that cat.
512
00:27:34,463 --> 00:27:36,899
- No.
- He was just this big,
513
00:27:37,443 --> 00:27:40,378
sweet, warm ball of fur and I would
514
00:27:40,981 --> 00:27:42,864
kiss him and hug him and just
515
00:27:43,213 --> 00:27:44,505
squeeze him so tight.
516
00:27:44,630 --> 00:27:47,121
Trying to show him
how much I loved him.
517
00:27:48,806 --> 00:27:51,644
But... One day I...
518
00:27:52,030 --> 00:27:54,276
... guess I loved him too much.
519
00:28:06,136 --> 00:28:07,476
Hair... no.
520
00:28:08,069 --> 00:28:08,918
Baby...
521
00:28:09,043 --> 00:28:10,104
Thing with...
522
00:28:10,557 --> 00:28:11,557
A face?
523
00:28:13,772 --> 00:28:15,066
The Mirror Has Two Faces!
524
00:28:15,236 --> 00:28:16,193
Yes!
525
00:28:17,116 --> 00:28:18,237
What is that?
526
00:28:18,781 --> 00:28:22,011
Whoever's up for a cupcake break,
follow me to the kitchen!
527
00:28:35,846 --> 00:28:37,933
- What are you doing here?
- I'm breaking you out!
528
00:28:38,058 --> 00:28:41,469
I heard the bands at the Union are the
best ever I don't want you to miss them.
529
00:28:42,505 --> 00:28:43,886
- I don't know.
- Come on.
530
00:28:44,011 --> 00:28:46,474
You can't seriously
be turning me down for charades.
531
00:28:48,354 --> 00:28:50,603
- No, OK.
- Put it down, come on.
532
00:28:54,176 --> 00:28:57,068
We can't have cupcakes
until we're all together!
533
00:29:02,523 --> 00:29:03,796
Traci, not yet.
534
00:29:04,175 --> 00:29:05,752
Not until we're all together.
535
00:29:08,614 --> 00:29:10,569
- What are you so smiley about?
- Me?
536
00:29:10,949 --> 00:29:12,553
I'm just happy to be with you.
537
00:29:13,189 --> 00:29:14,224
Yeah, me too.
538
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:19,042
Although I do wish I could see the look
on Casey's face right now.
539
00:29:19,634 --> 00:29:21,926
- She's not going to be that mad, right?
- No.
540
00:29:22,778 --> 00:29:24,126
Not at you, anyway.
541
00:29:25,033 --> 00:29:26,055
You know,
542
00:29:26,266 --> 00:29:28,844
I'm beginning to think
this date is less about me
543
00:29:28,969 --> 00:29:30,518
and more about your sister.
544
00:29:30,728 --> 00:29:32,645
No, no this date is all about you.
545
00:29:33,517 --> 00:29:34,752
It's about us.
546
00:29:35,627 --> 00:29:37,525
Getting you away from Casey
is just a bonus.
547
00:29:39,715 --> 00:29:41,779
You know I have three big brothers?
548
00:29:42,362 --> 00:29:46,108
As much as I love them and miss them,
we fight all the time.
549
00:29:46,468 --> 00:29:50,015
About everything. We even fight
over the remote for the TV.
550
00:29:51,116 --> 00:29:53,290
But it's not really
about the remote,
551
00:29:53,710 --> 00:29:56,210
it's just about the fighting,
because that's what we do.
552
00:29:58,495 --> 00:30:01,603
And I'm kind of starting to feel
like yours and Casey's remote.
553
00:30:01,728 --> 00:30:03,342
You're so not the remote.
554
00:30:06,108 --> 00:30:09,269
You're more like the...
whole entertainment center.
555
00:30:15,396 --> 00:30:16,272
Fine...
556
00:30:26,914 --> 00:30:30,426
This purge has really
got me thinking about us.
557
00:30:31,072 --> 00:30:32,072
And...
558
00:30:32,610 --> 00:30:34,789
You totally saw Alice first.
You should go out with her.
559
00:30:35,504 --> 00:30:37,850
- Well... no, no...
- Yeah. Well...
560
00:30:37,975 --> 00:30:40,610
No, because listen,
I was out of line.
561
00:30:40,735 --> 00:30:43,961
I would much rather
see you with her than me.
562
00:30:46,465 --> 00:30:48,565
It's funny.
We start talking again and...
563
00:30:49,419 --> 00:30:52,590
... we end up fighting over
the first pet-killing lunatic we meet.
564
00:30:59,020 --> 00:31:00,618
It's like it's
programmed in our DNA.
565
00:31:00,743 --> 00:31:02,274
- What's with that?
- I don't know.
566
00:31:02,399 --> 00:31:04,923
Women always seem to
complicate things.
567
00:31:05,830 --> 00:31:07,504
Just the really interesting ones.
568
00:31:10,288 --> 00:31:12,586
Amphoras!
Please take your seats.
569
00:31:12,711 --> 00:31:14,545
- Kha'y!
- And... Kha'y.
570
00:31:14,670 --> 00:31:17,199
And we'll continue with Mr. Cappie.
571
00:31:19,379 --> 00:31:22,148
Well, ready to spill your guts
in a roomful of strangers?
572
00:31:22,273 --> 00:31:23,904
- I will if you will.
- You're on.
573
00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:31,262
OK, so when I was three,...
574
00:31:36,604 --> 00:31:39,347
To never again waking up
to soft feminine moaning
575
00:31:39,472 --> 00:31:42,808
followed by the sound of
Griffin grunting "checkmate."
576
00:31:44,465 --> 00:31:45,778
You got a new roommate.
577
00:31:45,988 --> 00:31:48,225
Evan came through for me,
I couldn't believe it.
578
00:31:48,661 --> 00:31:51,622
- There may be hope for him after all.
- So who's the lucky guy?
579
00:31:52,230 --> 00:31:53,230
Grant.
580
00:31:54,071 --> 00:31:56,974
Grant?! Hot Grant? Gay Grant
that you supposedly can't date
581
00:31:57,099 --> 00:31:59,332
because of all the drama
it might cause at Omega Chi?
582
00:31:59,502 --> 00:32:01,585
Yeah. All three.
Too bad we didn't get a quad.
583
00:32:04,406 --> 00:32:07,091
I guess it's a matter of time
before you get your man hump on.
584
00:32:07,567 --> 00:32:09,649
OK, first of all: "Man hump?" No.
585
00:32:09,774 --> 00:32:12,246
And secondly, just because
we're two gay guys
586
00:32:12,371 --> 00:32:14,890
doesn't automatically mean
we can't control ourselves.
587
00:32:15,058 --> 00:32:16,938
Please, come on.
It's human nature.
588
00:32:17,469 --> 00:32:20,187
Two attractive people,
at their sexual peak,
589
00:32:20,356 --> 00:32:22,087
living in such close proximity?
590
00:32:22,212 --> 00:32:25,105
I guarantee if Casey were a guy,
she'd wake up in the middle of the night
591
00:32:25,230 --> 00:32:28,487
with a sheet, two comforters,
and 123 pounds of me on top of her...
592
00:32:29,634 --> 00:32:30,634
Him...
593
00:32:30,963 --> 00:32:32,533
Hypothetical male Casey.
594
00:32:33,584 --> 00:32:36,070
OK, anyways.
Grant and I are not like that.
595
00:32:36,455 --> 00:32:37,977
It's going to be really refreshing
596
00:32:38,102 --> 00:32:40,336
to have a roommate
who understands me.
597
00:32:40,461 --> 00:32:43,105
At the very least, we'll have
the cleanest room in the house.
598
00:32:43,230 --> 00:32:44,976
You know, besides Marco.
599
00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:49,565
Yes. This is the beginning
of a beautiful friendship.
600
00:32:54,300 --> 00:32:55,819
Cal, I'm gonna head up.
601
00:32:56,483 --> 00:32:57,483
Night.
602
00:32:59,475 --> 00:33:02,396
A beautiful friendship
based on doing it.
603
00:33:10,971 --> 00:33:12,054
Night, Rus.
604
00:33:13,036 --> 00:33:14,036
Bye.
605
00:33:17,443 --> 00:33:19,663
There you are!
And look who you're with.
606
00:33:21,857 --> 00:33:22,857
Yeah...
607
00:33:23,480 --> 00:33:26,024
After that last charade,
I came out to
608
00:33:26,463 --> 00:33:29,214
get some fresh air
and ran into Rusty.
609
00:33:30,271 --> 00:33:32,056
What a wonderful coincidence.
610
00:33:33,518 --> 00:33:34,809
See you tomorrow.
611
00:33:35,352 --> 00:33:36,352
Bye.
612
00:33:38,197 --> 00:33:40,517
I can't believe you deliberately
jeopardized my pledge night.
613
00:33:40,874 --> 00:33:43,270
Sometimes people screw up other
people's nights. It happens.
614
00:33:43,438 --> 00:33:45,409
I didn't screw up your night
on purpose.
615
00:33:45,774 --> 00:33:47,952
But what about tonight,
when I pointed out that you were
616
00:33:48,077 --> 00:33:50,097
and you did nothing?
Was that on purpose?
617
00:33:50,222 --> 00:33:51,249
I'm sorry, Rusty.
618
00:33:51,374 --> 00:33:54,972
I guess I'm not as good
at being alone as you are, OK?
619
00:33:55,097 --> 00:33:57,284
- I don't like it.
- I didn't like it either!
620
00:33:57,453 --> 00:33:59,594
So, now you're not alone and I am.
621
00:34:00,803 --> 00:34:02,873
I guess everything's right
in the world again.
622
00:34:15,465 --> 00:34:16,672
Fellow Amphoras,
623
00:34:17,150 --> 00:34:20,169
I want to congratulate you all
on your complete honesty.
624
00:34:20,558 --> 00:34:23,240
I have the utmost confidence
that we are leaving
625
00:34:23,365 --> 00:34:27,266
the Amphora Society in
worthy and capable hands.
626
00:34:28,163 --> 00:34:29,606
Good luck to you all.
627
00:34:33,273 --> 00:34:35,190
You both were unbelievable tonight.
628
00:34:35,864 --> 00:34:37,496
- Thanks, Alice.
- Thanks, Alice.
629
00:34:37,839 --> 00:34:41,632
Cappie, the way you opened up
about your rootless childhood?
630
00:34:42,030 --> 00:34:45,833
And Evan, the battle you feel
between your family and yourself?
631
00:34:47,523 --> 00:34:49,402
You both are so tortured!
632
00:34:49,836 --> 00:34:51,472
I just want to hug you.
633
00:34:51,597 --> 00:34:53,791
- No! Stop that.
- You don't need to...
634
00:34:54,445 --> 00:34:57,262
- Cappie's way more tortured than I am.
- You're way more tortured.
635
00:34:57,387 --> 00:34:59,223
You don't even know
if you like your parents.
636
00:34:59,348 --> 00:35:02,767
That's right. You know, you are right.
I'm going to give them a call
637
00:35:02,892 --> 00:35:04,932
and talk it out right now. That's...
638
00:35:05,057 --> 00:35:07,682
- What? No. You...
- Good night.
639
00:35:09,568 --> 00:35:12,533
I feel like I have so much more
inside me that I want to share.
640
00:35:12,658 --> 00:35:14,631
- Yeah I bet you do.
- Would you want to
641
00:35:14,756 --> 00:35:16,891
take a long walk down by the river?
642
00:35:21,220 --> 00:35:22,410
No. Maybe next week?
643
00:35:22,579 --> 00:35:25,984
I didn't get an answer from Dean Bowman
about the dry cleaner thing, so...
644
00:35:26,109 --> 00:35:28,093
- But...
- But we can...
645
00:35:28,218 --> 00:35:30,733
- You know...
- If you want...
646
00:35:32,836 --> 00:35:33,756
OK...
647
00:35:33,924 --> 00:35:35,985
- Hi.
- No more meetings for you?
648
00:35:36,456 --> 00:35:40,012
Too bad. I was getting used to your
James Earl Jones impersonation.
649
00:35:41,852 --> 00:35:43,599
The alumni will be
around if you need us.
650
00:35:44,681 --> 00:35:47,812
- You gave quite the purge tonight.
- Yeah, I purged my guts out.
651
00:35:48,458 --> 00:35:50,049
Time for you to purge.
652
00:35:50,327 --> 00:35:54,331
What am I doing here with all these
driven, successfulover-achiever types?
653
00:35:58,434 --> 00:36:00,029
You're here, Mr. Cappie,
654
00:36:00,992 --> 00:36:04,562
because nothing teaches us more
about who we are
655
00:36:05,606 --> 00:36:08,415
than seeing ourselves
in the people we least expect.
656
00:36:21,804 --> 00:36:23,213
No, I don't get it.
657
00:36:27,755 --> 00:36:29,454
Crunches. Awesome.
658
00:36:29,579 --> 00:36:31,522
Just doing my nightly pre-bedtime
659
00:36:32,590 --> 00:36:35,989
crunches! I sleep better if I
work off my nervous
660
00:36:36,435 --> 00:36:37,840
energy from the day!
661
00:36:42,534 --> 00:36:44,076
I didn't even get a chance to
662
00:36:44,990 --> 00:36:48,081
talk to you about this roommate
craziness, it all happened so fast.
663
00:36:48,849 --> 00:36:50,623
I hope you're cool
with this new situation.
664
00:36:50,792 --> 00:36:53,577
I've been trying to escape Trip
and his snoring for months.
665
00:36:53,702 --> 00:36:56,547
Yeah, man. I'm the coolest.
Minty fresh cool.
666
00:36:57,030 --> 00:36:58,303
Why wouldn't I be?
667
00:36:58,702 --> 00:37:02,706
It's just,I told you I was gay,
I didn't want you to think
668
00:37:03,554 --> 00:37:05,640
I was gonna be forcing
my gayness on you.
669
00:37:05,765 --> 00:37:07,306
No...
I wouldn't mind that.
670
00:37:07,476 --> 00:37:10,847
I mean, if you had questions.
I would just try to answer them.
671
00:37:10,972 --> 00:37:13,730
Great,
because I'm all about boundaries.
672
00:37:13,898 --> 00:37:15,148
I live for boundaries.
673
00:37:15,611 --> 00:37:16,959
- Great.
- Great.
674
00:37:22,247 --> 00:37:23,247
All right.
675
00:37:35,762 --> 00:37:36,691
I am
676
00:37:36,816 --> 00:37:37,816
exhausted!
677
00:37:38,382 --> 00:37:39,617
Sleepy time.
678
00:37:42,845 --> 00:37:45,180
- Just gonna go to bed.
- Me too.
679
00:37:46,027 --> 00:37:47,831
- After I hit the shower.
- Yeah.
680
00:37:51,978 --> 00:37:53,729
Hey guys, just checking on...
681
00:37:53,854 --> 00:37:55,728
- We were just going to bed...
- Sleepy time...
682
00:37:55,853 --> 00:37:57,969
- gonna take a shower.
- Do some... crunches and...
683
00:37:58,094 --> 00:37:59,568
Have all this nervous energy.
684
00:37:59,736 --> 00:38:00,737
That's cool.
685
00:38:01,237 --> 00:38:03,928
I mean, that's good 'cause...
It's important for roommates
686
00:38:04,053 --> 00:38:05,865
have the same sleep schedule...
687
00:38:06,454 --> 00:38:07,910
Glad you guys are hitting it off.
688
00:38:08,078 --> 00:38:09,681
- This guy...
- Match made in heaven.
689
00:38:09,806 --> 00:38:11,663
- Lovin' it.
- Just lovin' it.
690
00:38:12,025 --> 00:38:13,336
Well, as you were.
691
00:38:21,629 --> 00:38:24,002
You know what?
I just realized, I forgot...
692
00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:26,200
I left something...
693
00:38:27,097 --> 00:38:28,388
in the place where,
694
00:38:29,511 --> 00:38:30,581
excuse me!
695
00:38:31,201 --> 00:38:34,937
Stupid Casey and her stupid lock in.
She's so stupid.
696
00:38:37,255 --> 00:38:38,255
Spitter?
697
00:38:38,698 --> 00:38:40,692
You were saying
"stupid" an awful lot there.
698
00:38:40,861 --> 00:38:42,728
Figure out how to get
through the next year
699
00:38:42,853 --> 00:38:44,891
without having to see
my stupid sister.
700
00:38:45,521 --> 00:38:47,190
Conflict in the Cartwright clan?
701
00:38:47,315 --> 00:38:49,493
- Paging Danny Tanner.
- So ridiculous.
702
00:38:49,661 --> 00:38:51,286
Just because she can't be alone,
703
00:38:51,411 --> 00:38:53,832
she thinks it's fine for her to get
in the way of me and Jordan.
704
00:38:53,957 --> 00:38:55,826
Do you realize how many
nights in high school
705
00:38:55,951 --> 00:38:58,364
I sat alone watching
Joan of Arcadiawith my Mom
706
00:38:58,489 --> 00:39:00,337
while Casey went out
with all of her friends?
707
00:39:00,505 --> 00:39:03,256
Joan of Arcadiawas the one
with the Navy lawyers, right?
708
00:39:03,424 --> 00:39:04,856
- No. That's Jag.
- Jag.
709
00:39:05,167 --> 00:39:07,177
I watched that afterwards.
With my dad.
710
00:39:07,571 --> 00:39:10,870
God, I missed a lot of great
television by having friends.
711
00:39:10,995 --> 00:39:12,849
I mean, she knows how much
that sucked for me.
712
00:39:13,018 --> 00:39:15,041
You'd think she'd be the
one person who'd understand
713
00:39:15,166 --> 00:39:17,117
how important it is
for me to have a social life.
714
00:39:17,242 --> 00:39:19,401
Actually, you should be
the one person who understands
715
00:39:19,526 --> 00:39:21,775
how much it sucks when you feel
like you don't have one.
716
00:39:24,765 --> 00:39:27,447
You're friends with her, can't you
take her out to shoot pool or something?
717
00:39:27,909 --> 00:39:29,016
Sorry, buddy.
718
00:39:29,314 --> 00:39:32,202
I don't think I'm the guy she's looking
to spend time with.
719
00:39:33,309 --> 00:39:34,997
God, I wish I'd gone to M.I.T.
720
00:39:35,165 --> 00:39:37,740
- What the hell is that?
- It's a school? In Mass...
721
00:39:39,592 --> 00:39:42,176
I'm so glad to see you.
Can I borrow your keys?
722
00:39:42,301 --> 00:39:44,397
I need to sleep at your place again.
723
00:39:44,853 --> 00:39:45,853
Sure...
724
00:39:47,341 --> 00:39:49,808
Thanks, man. See you at home.
See you, Cap!
725
00:39:53,683 --> 00:39:56,350
Are the Omega Chis
hazing actives now?
726
00:40:06,583 --> 00:40:08,480
Look, before you say anything.
727
00:40:09,073 --> 00:40:11,533
I'm sorry about
the impromptu pledge night.
728
00:40:12,106 --> 00:40:16,079
I know. I let my needs come before
other people's personal lives
729
00:40:16,248 --> 00:40:17,428
and from now on,
730
00:40:17,553 --> 00:40:20,417
all pledge events will be scheduled
at least a week in advance.
731
00:40:21,130 --> 00:40:22,516
OK, fine.
732
00:40:22,894 --> 00:40:24,304
A month in advance.
733
00:40:24,429 --> 00:40:26,965
That's gonna be hard,
because I don't have an assistant,
734
00:40:29,469 --> 00:40:30,969
I'm trying to apologize.
735
00:40:33,954 --> 00:40:34,954
Right.
736
00:40:36,305 --> 00:40:37,322
Please,
737
00:40:37,575 --> 00:40:38,575
go ahead.
738
00:40:41,731 --> 00:40:45,735
I realized last night that maybe
the reason you're so bad at being alone
739
00:40:46,362 --> 00:40:48,570
is because you haven't
had to do it very much.
740
00:40:50,701 --> 00:40:52,442
I thought I'd share
something with you
741
00:40:52,567 --> 00:40:55,368
that helped me get
through a lot of long nights.
742
00:41:04,052 --> 00:41:05,290
Joan of Arcadia?
743
00:41:05,608 --> 00:41:08,486
- Is this the one about the Navy?
- No. It has angels in it.
744
00:41:08,611 --> 00:41:10,050
It's a really good show.
745
00:41:13,379 --> 00:41:15,505
- Thanks, Rusty.
- You're welcome.
746
00:41:17,556 --> 00:41:20,102
I'm sorry I freaked out so much
about my date.
747
00:41:21,163 --> 00:41:24,306
Before me, Jordan was dating
the star of the football team.
748
00:41:25,720 --> 00:41:27,109
I have a lot to live up to.
749
00:41:29,456 --> 00:41:32,864
Jordan wouldn't be with you if
she didn't already think you were great.
750
00:41:34,580 --> 00:41:35,580
Thank you.
751
00:41:46,796 --> 00:41:47,909
You gonna be OK?
752
00:41:50,203 --> 00:41:51,248
I miss Max.
753
00:41:52,429 --> 00:41:55,053
Ashleigh's busy with Fisher.
You've got a life.
754
00:41:56,053 --> 00:42:00,540
I feel like my go-to's are just
not very go-to-able right now.
755
00:42:01,919 --> 00:42:03,438
But I'll be OK.
756
00:42:04,389 --> 00:42:07,440
I'm actually thinking about
getting one of those little purse dogs.
757
00:42:08,226 --> 00:42:10,352
If you'd just told me that
the other night,
758
00:42:10,477 --> 00:42:13,280
I would've gone to Dobler's with
you after you ruined my date.
759
00:42:14,678 --> 00:42:18,168
Well, I probably would've taken
a cab from Sabatino's
760
00:42:18,293 --> 00:42:21,073
instead of ruining your date if
you told me about your intense,
761
00:42:21,395 --> 00:42:23,957
intense, but goundless insecurities
762
00:42:25,918 --> 00:42:28,128
Fair enough.
From now on, full disclosure.
763
00:42:28,660 --> 00:42:29,660
Agreed.
764
00:42:30,615 --> 00:42:32,624
Anything else
you want to come clean about?
765
00:42:39,192 --> 00:42:41,141
Remember that blanket
you used to have?
766
00:42:42,557 --> 00:42:45,063
The one that always smelled
really funny?
767
00:42:46,146 --> 00:42:47,593
You want to know why?
768
00:42:47,718 --> 00:42:50,242
Maybe we don't have to
tell each other everything...
769
00:42:50,367 --> 00:42:52,776
maybe we just start here
and go forward.
770
00:42:53,975 --> 00:42:54,975
OK.
771
00:42:57,296 --> 00:42:59,117
- I want to tell you.
- I don't want to know.
772
00:42:59,321 --> 00:43:00,492
It's not that bad.
773
00:43:00,617 --> 00:43:02,114
- It's not bad.
- I don't want.
774
00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:04,456
It's really not. You're making
it seem like it's so gross.
775
00:43:04,625 --> 00:43:06,571
- It's not that bad.
- Get out of here.
776
00:43:06,621 --> 00:43:11,171
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