All language subtitles for Ghost Busters pt 1

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:16,755 So, the Aldridge Mansion is the only 19th century home in New York City 2 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:19,269 preserved both inside and out. 3 00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:20,998 At the time of its construction, 4 00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:23,315 it was one of the most elegant homes in existence. 5 00:01:23,760 --> 00:01:27,548 Um, interesting fact. This grandfather clock was on the Titanic 6 00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:29,710 and was saved by Sir Aldridge. 7 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:31,836 A Romanian woman and her child were forced 8 00:01:31,861 --> 00:01:33,264 to leave the lifeboat to make room. 9 00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:36,197 Uh, over here, 10 00:01:36,320 --> 00:01:40,598 you can imagine Sir Aldridge entertaining his wealthy guests. 11 00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:43,415 It's said that, in this very room, P.T. Barnum 12 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:45,824 first had the idea to enslave elephants. 13 00:01:46,560 --> 00:01:48,198 And if you'll follow me... 14 00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:57,031 Now, I'm gonna tell you something a little spooky. 15 00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:02,793 On the morning of October 25th, 1894, Sir Aldridge awoke, furious, 16 00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:04,836 when his breakfast was not waiting for him. 17 00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:08,754 So he called to his servants, but none of them responded. 18 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:10,634 Why? 19 00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:15,839 Because, during the night, one by one, 20 00:02:15,920 --> 00:02:19,356 they had each been stabbed to death in their sleep. 21 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:22,319 It was later discovered 22 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:26,109 they were murdered by his eldest daughter, 23 00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:29,191 Gertrude Aldridge. 24 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:31,236 Sir Aldridge once wrote in his diary, 25 00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:33,197 "I know God makes no mistakes, 26 00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:36,876 "but I believe he may have been drunk when he built Gertrude's personality." 27 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:39,713 Now, to spare the family public humiliation, 28 00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:41,950 instead of turning her in to the police, 29 00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:45,670 they locked her in this basement. 30 00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:47,633 And they fed her... 31 00:02:49,280 --> 00:02:50,713 ...through this slot. 32 00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:54,475 Years later, when a new owner moved in, 33 00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:56,710 they dug out her remains. 34 00:02:56,840 --> 00:03:00,913 But, after repeatedly hearing strange sounds, 35 00:03:01,360 --> 00:03:03,032 he sealed it shut. 36 00:03:03,160 --> 00:03:07,312 That's right. No one has opened this door since then. 37 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:14,519 Okay. 38 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:15,715 Follow me. 39 00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:17,671 Maybe steer clear of the door. 40 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,389 Sorry, Sir Aldridge. I got to get out of here! 41 00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:48,159 Oh, Garret, you idiot. 42 00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:51,914 No. 43 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:55,072 No. 44 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:10,870 No! No! No! 45 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:13,193 No! No! 46 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:15,272 No! 47 00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:31,238 Daniel. Teresa. 48 00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:35,836 Dr. Roberts. Robert, hello. 49 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:39,230 - Erin, sweetheart. Hi. - Hello, Phil. 50 00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:41,072 - Good morning, Jack. - Hi. 51 00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:44,749 - Did you hear the news? - Tell me. 52 00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:47,115 I'm lecturing in the big hall today. 53 00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:49,310 - Darling, that's wonderful. - I know. 54 00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:52,472 - This is what you're wearing? - What? 55 00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:54,835 I have someone I want you to meet. 56 00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:58,196 Phyllis, I would like to introduce Erin Gilbert. 57 00:05:58,280 --> 00:06:01,556 She specializes in theoretical particle physics. 58 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,517 I'm a huge fan. 59 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:05,192 This is such an honor to meet you. 60 00:06:05,280 --> 00:06:08,955 Phyllis is guest lecturing in Daniels' astrophysics and cosmology. 61 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:10,120 Wow. 62 00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:13,118 Erin just learned she's being published. 63 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:15,596 Yes, well, I'm very proud. 64 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:18,433 I don't allow my lab to submit to journals anymore. 65 00:06:18,520 --> 00:06:20,796 I think journals tamper with the process 66 00:06:20,821 --> 00:06:23,095 and ultimately hurt scientific research. 67 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:25,705 Yeah. It's like when scientists get caught 68 00:06:25,730 --> 00:06:27,860 up, you know, in those dumb awards. 69 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:30,559 - You know... - Oh, awards are massively important. 70 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:33,393 Yes, no, I was saying it'd be dumb not to go after awards, 71 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,550 'cause that's where science really shines. 72 00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:39,758 It's, unfortunately, the only way to draw attention to good science. 73 00:06:39,840 --> 00:06:41,319 - Excellent point. - Mmm-hmm. 74 00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:43,591 All right. I should be going. 75 00:06:43,680 --> 00:06:44,680 Hey, Simon. 76 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:49,993 Well, I'm going to lecture right now 77 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:51,988 in the big hall. 78 00:06:52,080 --> 00:06:54,100 It's good that it's big, too, 'cause I've got 79 00:06:54,125 --> 00:06:56,143 a lot of big ideas I'm going to be spreading. 80 00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:59,510 Hey, good luck on your tenure review. Make me proud. 81 00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:01,189 Fingers crossed. 82 00:07:01,280 --> 00:07:03,874 Not that crossing your fingers means anything, 'cause it doesn't. 83 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:05,837 Oh, I couldn't disagree more. 84 00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:10,357 It's been proven that superstitions can have tremendous performance benefits. 85 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:13,752 Exactly. I'm wrong about everything. 86 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:15,480 All right. Well, I'm gonna try to get out 87 00:07:15,505 --> 00:07:17,144 of here without stepping on these cracks. 88 00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:19,839 I don't want my mom calling me, like... 89 00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:22,960 Oh, see, when they change direction, you've got to... 90 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:24,952 So, you know her? 91 00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:26,951 Oh! Ding dong. 92 00:07:27,040 --> 00:07:28,040 Yeah. 93 00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:31,516 Sean, that is an excellent question. 94 00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,955 As you can see from my calculations, 95 00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:39,353 we will soon be able to combine general relativity and quantum theory. 96 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:42,238 Teaching in the big hall. Big day. 97 00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:50,358 Big hall. Big hall. Big hall! 98 00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:51,995 Big hall! 99 00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:55,152 Sorry to interrupt, but I need to speak to you about something you wrote. 100 00:07:55,240 --> 00:07:56,240 Um... 101 00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:59,395 I'm sorry. Uh, yes. What, um... 102 00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:00,835 What publication? 103 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:02,228 I'm talking about your book. 104 00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:03,760 Mmm... 105 00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:06,029 Book. Um... 106 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:08,391 I'm sorry, I don't know what you mean. 107 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:10,536 Now, if you'll excuse me, my class will be here any minute. 108 00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:11,993 You're Erin Gilbert, right? 109 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:13,480 Co-author of Ghosts from Our Past: 110 00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:16,154 Both Literally and Figuratively: The Study of the Paranormal? 111 00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:19,638 I think you're looking for a different Erin Gilbert. 112 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:22,314 One that likes very long titles. 113 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:26,439 Okay. But this really does look like you. 114 00:08:27,400 --> 00:08:28,719 What? No. 115 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:30,148 Yeah, that's me. 116 00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:32,799 Look, it was a very long time ago, 117 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,075 and it was just a gag between a couple of friends. 118 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:36,474 I'm sorry. 119 00:08:36,560 --> 00:08:38,516 A 460-page gag? 120 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:41,919 The first sentence is, "This is not a joke." 121 00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:43,355 What do you want? 122 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:44,668 Well, I'm Ed Mulgrave. 123 00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:47,957 I'm the historian at the Aldridge Mansion, and I believe it's haunted. 124 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:49,633 If you could just come take a look. 125 00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:52,553 I tried the police, but I just sound crazy. 126 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:55,871 I'm sorry. That book you're holding is utter nonsense. 127 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,875 I don't even know how you got that. I thought I burned both copies. 128 00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:01,951 It's on Amazon. Both hard copy and e-book. 129 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:04,515 - What? - It's on Books on Tape, too. 130 00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:06,033 Only, I know how to read. 131 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:07,635 Is it now? 132 00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:09,475 No! 133 00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:12,597 No, no, no, no, no. I'm gonna kill you, Abby. 134 00:09:13,040 --> 00:09:14,040 - Oh. - Erin. 135 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:16,315 Hi! Oh, Dr. Filmore. Hello, hi. 136 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:19,631 We're set for the final review of your tenure case on Thursday. 137 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,195 Great. 138 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:23,874 But I saw that you had a recommendation letter 139 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:25,752 from Dr. Branum at Princeton. 140 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:27,976 - Uh... - Their science department 141 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:30,070 is really not what it used to be. 142 00:09:30,160 --> 00:09:34,358 And I would consider getting a referral from a more prestigious college. 143 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:36,237 More prestigious than Princeton? 144 00:09:36,720 --> 00:09:37,720 Yes. 145 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:39,313 Um, hmm. 146 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:44,038 You see, I think you're an asset to modern physics, 147 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:47,152 but I would hate to see you throw it down the drain. 148 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:49,670 No. No, no, no, sir. I won't throw it down the drain. 149 00:09:49,760 --> 00:09:51,398 And I will get on that letter. 150 00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:56,429 Yes. Princeton. More like Prince-tons of dummies go there. 151 00:09:57,080 --> 00:09:58,593 About your clothes... 152 00:09:58,840 --> 00:10:00,432 Yes? Did you... 153 00:10:00,520 --> 00:10:01,520 Uh... 154 00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:05,118 Too sexy for academia? 155 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:06,629 Never mind. 156 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:08,828 No, no, no. What is it? 157 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:10,992 - Never mind! - I don't... 158 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:18,472 Abby. You promised you wouldn't do this. 159 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:22,628 "Abigail continues her passion for the study of the paranormal 160 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:26,235 "at the Kenneth P. Higgins Institute of Science." 161 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:37,753 Come on, F7! 162 00:10:38,360 --> 00:10:39,360 Are you kidding me? 163 00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:52,720 Hello? 164 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:54,631 I've been waiting a long time. 165 00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:57,078 Has been a while, hasn't it? 166 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,194 Hope you brought me more than one wonton. 167 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:02,275 Excuse me? Oh. 168 00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:08,640 Huh. 169 00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:12,477 Well, well, well. 170 00:11:13,120 --> 00:11:14,120 Erin. 171 00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:15,714 Abby. 172 00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:17,595 Bennie. 173 00:11:17,680 --> 00:11:20,433 Yes, I know who you are, Bennie. Can I just... 174 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:23,911 Can I have my lunch that I've been waiting an hour for? 175 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,956 You know they make smaller headphones now, right? 176 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:27,593 It's an advance in science. 177 00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:29,399 Thank you for asking. 178 00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,357 Probably the future you're looking at. 179 00:11:31,560 --> 00:11:32,560 Here you go. 180 00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:35,200 Why don't you show Miss Gilbert to the door. 181 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,077 Oh, it's just the same door we came in from. 182 00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:38,818 Yeah, I know how to get out. It's figurative. 183 00:11:38,843 --> 00:11:39,936 It's really not that hard. 184 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,439 - No, I'm okay. - Don't. 185 00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:43,393 - I tried. - Poorly. 186 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:47,633 You put our book online without my permission. 187 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,399 I don't need your permission. 188 00:11:49,520 --> 00:11:51,816 Of course you need my permission. I wrote that book with you. 189 00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:53,034 My name is on it. 190 00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:55,236 No. Absolutely not. 191 00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:57,749 That book is a whole new revenue stream for me. 192 00:11:57,840 --> 00:12:00,752 And I'm, like, one-tenth away from getting a new mini fridge in here. 193 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:02,273 Look, I am up for tenure right now. 194 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:04,120 Ooh, "I'm up for tenure." 195 00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:06,714 And if my colleagues at Columbia University google my name, 196 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:08,597 that is the first thing that comes up. 197 00:12:08,680 --> 00:12:10,989 Along with a ghost emoji now, thank you very much, 198 00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:12,216 - that does a little dance. - You know what? 199 00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:14,037 That book was our baby. 200 00:12:14,120 --> 00:12:17,635 And you abandoned that baby before it even learned to fly! 201 00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:20,598 Okay, well, books can't fly. And neither can babies, so... 202 00:12:20,680 --> 00:12:22,318 You don't know. I'll tell you what. 203 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,340 If I had a human baby that could fly, I 204 00:12:24,365 --> 00:12:26,303 wouldn't be telling the press about it. 205 00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:29,750 If I had a flying baby, I'd zip this, and so would you. 206 00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:32,513 There is no experimental backing for anything in that book. 207 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:34,670 And it makes me look like a crazy person. 208 00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:37,194 - God! Are you kidding me? - What? 209 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:39,316 I got one wonton! 210 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:43,313 I got a tub of soup, and I got one split wonton. 211 00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:45,152 Look at that, just floating there. 212 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,416 I'm sorry you're having a soup crisis right now. 213 00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:49,908 There's not even any meat in there. That's just a carrot. 214 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,274 Abby, please. 215 00:12:51,440 --> 00:12:53,078 - Yes. - Abby! 216 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:54,160 I got one wonton! 217 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:55,549 What do I have to do? 218 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:59,076 I will take my top off for Bennie if it gets me three more wontons. 219 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:00,719 I swear to God. 220 00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:03,628 You carry a lot of tension in your shoulders. 221 00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:06,675 I'm sorry, hello? Who are you? 222 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:10,637 Holtzmann. Virgo. 223 00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:12,836 Avid skier. Gluten-full. 224 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:15,800 And 100% jazzed to meet you. 225 00:13:16,640 --> 00:13:18,631 Don't get too close to her, Holtzmann. 226 00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:21,056 She'll ask you to write a book, and then she'll squash your dreams. 227 00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:22,115 Okay. 228 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:23,536 Holtzmann works with me here in the lab. 229 00:13:23,560 --> 00:13:27,030 She's a brilliant engineer and very loyal. 230 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:28,991 She would not abandon you. 231 00:13:29,120 --> 00:13:30,439 I get it. 232 00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:33,318 She also happens to specialize in experimental particle physics. 233 00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,073 - Oh. - She was almost hired by CERN. 234 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:37,434 That's very impressive. 235 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:39,158 Uh, what happened? 236 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:41,754 - There was a lab incident. - But he's gonna wake up. 237 00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:43,757 - He woke up yesterday. - Great. 238 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:45,831 Then he screamed and went back into a coma. 239 00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:47,831 Well, I bet all that screaming tuckered him out. 240 00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:50,434 Um, can we get back to our discussion please? 241 00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:54,149 Oh, gosh, it sounds like a great time, but I'm gonna have to say no 242 00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:56,310 because Holtzmann and I are really busy here 243 00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:59,756 actualizing what we just theorized about in our book. 244 00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:00,875 - Really? - Yeah. 245 00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:04,475 We're incredibly close on the hollow laser for the reverse tractor beam. 246 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:05,788 Really close. 247 00:14:05,880 --> 00:14:07,360 You're making a reverse tractor beam? 248 00:14:07,440 --> 00:14:10,352 Abby, why don't you let her listen to the EVP. 249 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:12,476 - What EVP? - No. Not... There's no EVP. 250 00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:15,074 - EVP is electro... - Electro voice phenomenon. 251 00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:16,752 I'm familiar. I know what it means. 252 00:14:16,840 --> 00:14:19,354 And there's never been one substantiated. 253 00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,317 Oh, there hasn't? There hasn't been one... 254 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:22,833 You know what? You come with me. 255 00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:25,036 With a suit on and you get so cocky. 256 00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:29,949 A few months ago, we spent eight nights at the Chelsea Hotel. 257 00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:31,189 We didn't get anything. 258 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:33,198 Well, we didn't think so. 259 00:14:33,280 --> 00:14:37,114 And then later, in the lab, when we were reviewing these tapes... 260 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:49,936 - Wow, you really got me. - You know what? 261 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:51,456 Usually we can't even get people over here. 262 00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:53,416 - But we have never... - She came right over to it. 263 00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:56,238 Never had anybody actually put their face down close to the machine. 264 00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:59,232 It's a cool joke. That was funny. It's disgusting. 265 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:01,776 Is it more or less disgusting if I tell you it came from the front? 266 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:05,110 - Oh, you didn't... Oh. - I can do it live if you want. 267 00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:06,997 What's next? You gonna give me a wedgie? 268 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:11,472 No. I think both of us pretty much feel you have enough stuck up your butt. 269 00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:12,915 Burn! 270 00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:16,856 Okay, you know what, I thought we could have an adult conversation, 271 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:18,632 but apparently we can't. 272 00:15:18,720 --> 00:15:21,029 Erin, if you don't believe in this stuff anymore, 273 00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:23,076 then why were you looking for the book? 274 00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:27,199 A man came to see me at my work saying his building was haunted. 275 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:28,760 What building? 276 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:30,432 The Aldridge Mansion. 277 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:32,636 It's obviously a joke. 278 00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:36,313 What are you doing? 279 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:37,435 Uh! 280 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:38,656 See, this is, this is exactly... 281 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:40,557 - You want to go find some ghosts? - Yes. 282 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:44,040 Break! 283 00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:45,120 Ooh! 284 00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:48,190 - Wait, you're going? - I got the pack. 285 00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:50,837 Abby! Please, Abby. The book. 286 00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:52,751 Come on. Let's go! 287 00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:54,114 I'm not going with you guys. 288 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:55,792 Oh, no. Are you kidding? 289 00:15:55,880 --> 00:15:57,279 You were never invited! 290 00:15:57,360 --> 00:15:59,669 I need you out of the lab, so I can lock the door. 291 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,115 Oh. Well, you said "let's," so... 292 00:16:02,200 --> 00:16:03,656 - Oh, my God. Just pull the... - We're wasting time. 293 00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:05,176 Just close the door behind you, it'll lock! 294 00:16:05,200 --> 00:16:06,519 Abby, wait! 295 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:08,553 Hey! Taxi! 296 00:16:09,200 --> 00:16:10,474 - Hey! Hey! - Abby. 297 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:12,039 Abby, come on. 298 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:14,156 Please, Abby, just take the book down. Please. 299 00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:15,913 All right, all right, 300 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:19,231 but you have to introduce us to this guy at the Aldridge Mansion. 301 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:20,560 Yes, he would love to meet you. 302 00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:22,795 Then I will consider, maybe, 303 00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:25,952 taking the book down until you get your stupid tenure 304 00:16:26,040 --> 00:16:27,393 at your stupider college. 305 00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,710 Absolutely. Yes, I will. Yes, of course! 306 00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:35,349 You got it? 307 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,191 Excuse me! Excuse me! 308 00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:40,709 We're not open. 309 00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,552 - Can I help you? - Yes. Hi. 310 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:43,959 We're looking for Ed Mulgrave. 311 00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:46,713 - I wanted to introduce these people to him. - Hi there. 312 00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,518 He came to see me this morning. 313 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:50,511 - Ed Mulgrave? - Yes. 314 00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:53,160 But Ed Mulgrave died 15 years ago. 315 00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:55,032 - Yes! That's awesome! - What? 316 00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:56,678 Dead for 15 years! 317 00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:58,955 Ed's a ghost! Ha! Knew it! 318 00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:00,599 I just saw him today... Oh. 319 00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:02,595 He's... 320 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:04,189 So, who is this? 321 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:06,396 That's Ed's son. Ed Junior. 322 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:08,256 Okay. That's obviously who I meant. That's... 323 00:17:08,280 --> 00:17:10,462 Hi, Junior. If I may, uh, when is the last 324 00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:12,820 time the paranormal entity was actually seen? 325 00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:16,839 And if you were to rank it, let's say between probably a T1 and T5... 326 00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:20,037 Garret here saw it on Tuesday, and I believe it made him soil himself. 327 00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:22,190 - Jesus. - Wow. Soiling. 328 00:17:22,280 --> 00:17:24,032 I'd put that at a T3. 329 00:17:24,360 --> 00:17:25,634 T4, if it was poop. 330 00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:27,216 - What? - Unless you ate something weird. 331 00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:28,434 Then it wasn't the ghost. 332 00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:30,636 Kinda hard to suss that out after the fact though. 333 00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:31,948 I didn't soil myself. 334 00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:34,840 He did. He called me sobbing, saying, "Oh, my God, my pants are toast." 335 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:37,354 Did you happen to keep a sample of the soiling? 336 00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:38,475 A sample? 337 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:39,096 Okay. All right. 338 00:17:39,121 --> 00:17:40,536 I'd love to get that back to the lab. 339 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:43,279 Well, uh, so I have made the introduction. 340 00:17:43,360 --> 00:17:44,793 - Yeah, thank you. - There you go. 341 00:17:44,880 --> 00:17:46,776 All right, well, how 'bout you take us across the street. 342 00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:49,314 I got to get in there, set up. Let's go on a tour. 343 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:50,480 Uh... 344 00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:51,993 You're gonna die in there. 345 00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:54,239 Aldridge Mansion. Take one. 346 00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:56,117 And we are rolling. 347 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,156 Checking the settings. We look good. 348 00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:00,195 What is that? 349 00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:03,033 Looks like one of those things that makes cotton candy. 350 00:18:03,120 --> 00:18:04,997 It's a PKE meter. 351 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:08,876 There's a ghost anywhere around here, this baby's gonna find it. 352 00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:10,315 Does it work? 353 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,670 Uh, yeah, it works. 354 00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:16,435 I just haven't had the appropriate proximity to an entity for it to work. 355 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:17,999 Strange reading here. 356 00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:22,119 Ma'am, can you tell us where you got the world's tiniest bow tie? 357 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:24,350 Uh, it came with the shirt. 358 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:29,070 Okay, somebody really doesn't want us getting in that door. 359 00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:31,616 Can you tell us what it's like to walk around in those shoes all day? 360 00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:33,756 - It's not fun. - All right. 361 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:36,110 Oh, Holtzmann, check this out. 362 00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,349 Hold your ponies. 363 00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:00,953 All right. Good gag. 364 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:02,553 Hey, are you getting that? 365 00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:03,675 Very funny. 366 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:06,672 Is everything a joke to you guys? 367 00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:07,989 Just your mama. 368 00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:10,230 No, actually, I think the world of your mom. 369 00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:12,311 You guys put all that gooey stuff on the floor. 370 00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:15,269 You opened the basement door. You tried to freak me out. 371 00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:16,958 We did not open the basement door... 372 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:19,235 Basement door is open. 373 00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:22,829 - I didn't open it. Did you open it? - I did not open it. 374 00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:26,056 You know what, it was probably Ed. And the guy who didn't poop his pants. 375 00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:27,513 Uh-uh-uh-uh. 376 00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:28,794 Look over there. 377 00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:35,878 I didn't even know it did that. 378 00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:38,828 Oh. Ah. 379 00:19:38,920 --> 00:19:40,876 - I... My ears just... - Mine just popped, too. 380 00:19:40,960 --> 00:19:41,960 That is definitely... 381 00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:43,678 - An AP-xH shift. Yes! - Shift. 382 00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:46,274 - I mean, for sure. That's... - Uh, guys? 383 00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:48,592 I don't think we're alone. 384 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:49,908 Holy crap. 385 00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:51,473 Let me have the camera. Thank you. 386 00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:52,595 Okay. 387 00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:58,872 How can you be eating right now? 388 00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:00,313 Once you pop... 389 00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:11,558 Are you seeing what I'm seeing? 390 00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:13,472 Good God. 391 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,232 Class 4 apparition. 392 00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:16,833 Distinct human form. 393 00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:18,797 This can't be happening. 394 00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:20,472 Oh, it's happening, all right. 395 00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:22,480 That's the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. 396 00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:27,639 I'm gonna try to talk to it. 397 00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:31,549 Just be careful, she could be malevolent. 398 00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:33,517 Yeah, just make sure you're recording it. 399 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,113 - Yeah, I'm getting it all. - Okay. 400 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:36,519 Just be cautious. 401 00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:39,035 I think she wants to communicate with us. 402 00:20:39,120 --> 00:20:40,400 I knew it, I knew it, I knew it. 403 00:20:41,120 --> 00:20:42,997 It's okay. She seems peaceful. 404 00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:45,679 Hello. 405 00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:47,593 I think you're gorgeous. 406 00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:50,554 Hello. Hi. 407 00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:54,759 Um, my name is Erin Gilbert, Doctor of Particle Physics at Columbia... 408 00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:07,432 - Yes! - Oh, God! 409 00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:08,748 She's getting away! Come on! 410 00:21:10,360 --> 00:21:12,078 - Hurry, hurry! - Run! 411 00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:14,256 - Get it, get it! - Where'd it go? Where'd it go? 412 00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:16,032 - Where'd it go? Where'd it go? - There! 413 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:17,200 Oh! 414 00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:22,033 What just happened? 415 00:21:22,120 --> 00:21:23,678 Abby, what just happened? 416 00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,674 I'll tell you what just happened. We saw a ghost. 417 00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:29,016 - We saw a ghost! - Yeah, we saw a ghost! 418 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:30,678 We saw a ghost! Oh, my God! 419 00:21:30,760 --> 00:21:32,273 - We saw a ghost. - We saw a ghost! 420 00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:34,637 Oh, my God, we saw a ghost! 421 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:38,152 We were right! We weren't crazy! 422 00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:40,674 - Oh. Oh. - Oh. Oh. 423 00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:44,633 We saw a ghost! 424 00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:46,517 Ghosts are real! Ghosts are real! 425 00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:48,136 I believe in ghosts 'cause I just saw one! 426 00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:49,400 They're real! 427 00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:53,318 Who is that? 428 00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:55,834 - Dr. Bronstein saw this on Reddit. - Hmm. 429 00:21:56,240 --> 00:22:00,631 It was re-blogged from a site entitled Ghost News. 430 00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:03,231 Not a publication I'd heard of. 431 00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:06,073 I hope you understand that when we give someone tenure... 432 00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:07,879 Oh, I accept your tenure. 433 00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:11,794 When we give someone tenure, they represent this institution. 434 00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:15,550 But this is just not what this institution is about. 435 00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:20,116 Ah, Dr. Gibbons. 436 00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:22,836 Found mold in my office, so I gotta move. 437 00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:25,673 Don't tell anyone. I don't want people to panic or anything. 438 00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:26,954 Kids, hello. 439 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:30,430 I didn't get fired. Even though I have the old plant in the box. 440 00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:34,273 Margaret, hi. Just taking my plant out for some air. 441 00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:37,871 Just like to carry it in this box with all my other personal stuff. 442 00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:41,310 Phil. Phil. Hi. Phil, um... 443 00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:44,039 If you turn around, you'll see me. I'm right behind you. 444 00:22:44,120 --> 00:22:45,951 Oh, yeah. He's looking at that chart. 445 00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,976 Couldn't figure that out, either. Call me when you figure that out. 446 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,558 Haven't been able to. 447 00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:51,874 Samantha. Hi. How are you? 448 00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:55,350 Ugh. Sixty. Seventy. 449 00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:57,576 Sometimes, I like to put all my stuff from my office in a box 450 00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:00,797 and just do some exercises and just use it as weights. Eighty. 451 00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:04,795 Well, I hope you're happy. 452 00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:08,119 That video you posted got me fired. 453 00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:09,800 Fired! 454 00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:15,153 - No! God, no! We will all die. - Turn to ash from the inside out. 455 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:17,470 - What? - Put it down. Carefully. 456 00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:22,676 - Put it... Put it down... Oh, my God. - Fired! 457 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:24,995 After years, 458 00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:26,789 years of hard work. 459 00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:28,108 And ass-kissing. 460 00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:30,236 God, I kissed so many different kinds of asses. 461 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:33,471 Erin, we're sorry that you lost your job. 462 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:36,313 But, I mean, there is kind of a glass is half full aspect of it. 463 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,516 I mean, we saw a real ghost. 464 00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:40,079 You know, and she was beautiful. 465 00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:43,158 Till she dislocated her jaw and ecto-projected all over you. 466 00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:45,834 Yeah, that stuff went everywhere, by the way, in every crack. 467 00:23:45,920 --> 00:23:50,311 But, I got to say, even that was kind of spectacularly beautiful. 468 00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:54,510 I did detect a heavy ionization discharge. 469 00:23:54,600 --> 00:23:55,600 I mean, I could smell it. 470 00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:59,559 A full-torso transmogrification with corporeal aggression. 471 00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:01,517 I mean, how often does that happen? 472 00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:03,431 I mean, they want us to be quiet about that? 473 00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:05,397 We are not gonna be quiet about that. 474 00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:08,677 And it's not just us. We have over 100 comments already. 475 00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:10,119 And they're not all crazies. 476 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:11,600 Come here, I want to show you this. 477 00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:15,033 Read that. 478 00:24:15,120 --> 00:24:17,714 "Ain't no bitches gonna hunt no ghosts." 479 00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:19,358 Oh, no, no. Okay. 480 00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:21,078 The one below it. 481 00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:24,755 This woman is describing a Class 3 haunting in her house. 482 00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:27,195 She can't just move. She can't call the police. 483 00:24:27,280 --> 00:24:29,136 She can't call her friends. Who's she gonna call? 484 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:31,151 Ghost Jumpers! 485 00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:33,736 Tonight, the Ghost Jumpers make contact with the ghost of Bigfoot. 486 00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:35,716 God! These phonies! 487 00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:37,028 I mean, you know what? 488 00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:39,711 These guys are the reason you got fired. 489 00:24:39,800 --> 00:24:43,873 It's because of stuff like this that makes it impossible for us to do our real work. 490 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,719 This cannot be the best option for people. 491 00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:49,951 Okay, we are on the cusp of something here, a real discovery. 492 00:24:50,800 --> 00:24:54,759 Unlike Columbia, this institute is 100% behind us. 493 00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:55,909 Really? 494 00:24:56,000 --> 00:25:00,232 Erin, this is what we have dreamed about since we were little kids. 495 00:25:00,360 --> 00:25:04,831 I know that if you come and join us here, they are gonna be so pumped. 496 00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:07,434 We just have to go upstairs and ask for more money. 497 00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:10,478 I just honestly didn't realize your department still existed. 498 00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:13,074 - What? - Come on, ghosts? 499 00:25:13,160 --> 00:25:18,439 I will not let the 12-year reputation of this fine institution be besmirched by you! 500 00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:22,549 Oh, come on! Suddenly this place has a classy reputation to uphold? 501 00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:25,438 You're only dean now because the last dean went to jail. 502 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:27,317 Are you saying that I'm not qualified? 503 00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:29,595 You spell science with a "Y ". 504 00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:33,434 And what's upsetting about that is I don't think you know that that's wrong. 505 00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:36,671 This is an institution of higher learning. 506 00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:38,637 And if you guys want to study "ghosts," 507 00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:42,269 do it somewhere else, because I have two words for you. 508 00:25:42,360 --> 00:25:43,793 Let me guess, "Get out"? 509 00:25:43,880 --> 00:25:46,519 - No, he's gonna say "suck it." - He's not gonna say "suck it." 510 00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:48,159 Suck it. 511 00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:49,856 - You were right. - You know... 512 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:51,029 Oh, my gosh. 513 00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:53,314 I think it might be a ghost. 514 00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:55,278 Oh, no, it's not. It's just a bird. 515 00:25:55,360 --> 00:25:56,679 Bye. There's the door. 516 00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:58,955 Later days. Can you hear this? Let me turn it up. 517 00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:02,799 Oh, my God. 518 00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:06,395 This is incredibly immature behavior. 519 00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:10,229 Caught it. 520 00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:11,992 Just a minor setback. 521 00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:14,389 You know what, guys? I think we can really do this. 522 00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:17,631 We can become the first scientists to prove the existence of the paranormal. 523 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,910 All we have to do is find an entity and capture it 524 00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,992 and bring it into a controlled environment. That's all! 525 00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:26,597 Hey! There's the Erin I remember. Welcome back. 526 00:26:26,680 --> 00:26:28,796 - Thank you. - Nice. 527 00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:30,616 Okay, we should probably get this equipment out of here. 528 00:26:30,640 --> 00:26:32,816 - They're gonna want it back. - I thought this stuff was yours. 529 00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:33,955 - All stolen. - No... 530 00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:36,315 Hey! That worthless garbage belongs to this school! 531 00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:38,278 Scatter! Scatter! Scatter! 532 00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,273 Go, go, go, scatter! 533 00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:49,035 Hey. Uh, good morning. 534 00:26:49,120 --> 00:26:50,439 Okay. 535 00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,195 Hey, how you doing, sir? Got a Metro... 536 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:56,511 Hey. That's a dope jacket, man. I got that jacket. 537 00:26:56,600 --> 00:26:58,875 You know what? It's a sweater. I made a mistake. 538 00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:00,279 You have a good day, all right? 539 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,195 Whoa. Hey! How you doing, man? 540 00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:04,838 They'll always ignore you. 541 00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:09,835 They are walking sewage, concerned only with their own trivial matters. 542 00:27:10,120 --> 00:27:11,189 Okay. Um... 543 00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:12,600 When the Fourth Cataclysm begins, 544 00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:16,719 laborers, such as yourself, will be among the last led to the butchery. 545 00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:18,995 So, make the most of your extra time. 546 00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:23,109 You are just a bundle of joy, ain't ya? 547 00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,589 You have a good day with your crazy ass. 41355

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