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1
00:00:02,391 --> 00:00:05,200
- OKAY, DOCTORS, THIS IS
THE LAST OF THE SUPPLIES.
2
00:00:05,248 --> 00:00:08,529
GRAB YOU A BOX AND WE'LL GET
ON OVER TO THE HEALTH FAIR.
3
00:00:09,352 --> 00:00:12,830
- DONUTS, LAVERNE?
WE'RE TESTING FOR CHOLESTEROL.
4
00:00:13,929 --> 00:00:15,457
- THE DONUTS
ARE BAIT.
5
00:00:15,492 --> 00:00:17,911
ONCE THEY GRAB 'EM,
WE'LL JAB 'EM.
6
00:00:20,297 --> 00:00:22,227
THAT'S A JOKE.
WHY AIN'T YOU LAUGHIN'?
7
00:00:23,099 --> 00:00:25,918
- BECAUSE IT'S 6:18
ON A SATURDAY MORNING.
8
00:00:26,125 --> 00:00:29,213
I SHOULD BE DRIVIN' HOME
FROM SOMEWHERE, DAMN IT.
9
00:00:30,170 --> 00:00:32,807
- COME ON, MAX.
IT WON'T BE ALL THAT BAD.
10
00:00:32,843 --> 00:00:35,510
LAVERNE AND I HAVE BEEN DOING
THIS HEALTH FAIR FOR YEARS.
11
00:00:35,545 --> 00:00:36,714
- OH, YEAH.
12
00:00:36,753 --> 00:00:37,935
IT'S A HOOT.
13
00:00:37,983 --> 00:00:41,049
GETTIN' TO HOB-NOB WITH SOME OF
YOUR FAVORITE CELEBRITIES.
14
00:00:41,084 --> 00:00:42,750
- I'M NOT IMPRESSED
BY CELEBRITIES.
15
00:00:42,786 --> 00:00:44,519
- OH, I THINK YOU'LL BE
SINGIN' A DIFFERENT TUNE
16
00:00:44,554 --> 00:00:46,554
ONCE YOU HAVE A
BRUSH WITH GREATNESS.
17
00:00:46,590 --> 00:00:51,013
TWO YEARS AGO I ACTUALLY MET
ROY CLARK'S DENTAL HYGIENIST.
18
00:00:52,529 --> 00:00:56,931
19
00:00:56,967 --> 00:00:58,233
LIFE GOES ON
20
00:00:58,268 --> 00:01:00,502
AND SO
DO WE
21
00:01:00,537 --> 00:01:01,936
JUST HOW
WE DO IT
22
00:01:01,972 --> 00:01:04,772
IS NO MYSTERY
23
00:01:04,808 --> 00:01:06,641
ONE BY ONE
24
00:01:06,676 --> 00:01:08,343
WE FILL
THE DAYS
25
00:01:08,378 --> 00:01:12,180
WE FIND A THOUSAND
DIFFERENT WAYS
26
00:01:12,215 --> 00:01:16,084
SOMETIMES THE ANSWER
CAN BE HARD TO FIND
27
00:01:16,119 --> 00:01:18,920
THAT'S SOMETHING
I WILL NEVER BE
28
00:01:18,955 --> 00:01:21,890
I'M ALWAYS HERE
29
00:01:21,925 --> 00:01:25,827
FOR ANYTHING
YOU NEED
30
00:01:27,931 --> 00:01:29,330
RAIN OR SHINE
31
00:01:29,366 --> 00:01:32,567
I'LL BE
THE ONE
32
00:01:32,602 --> 00:01:36,170
TO SHARE IT ALL
AS LIFE GOES ON
33
00:01:36,206 --> 00:01:41,776
WE SHARE IT ALL
AS LIFE GOES ON
34
00:01:58,230 --> 00:02:00,497
- SOPHIA, WHAT
A NICE SURPRISE.
35
00:02:00,533 --> 00:02:02,945
- YEAH, YEAH, GIVE ME
SOME FREE STUFF.
36
00:02:04,303 --> 00:02:06,270
- OKAY, WE'LL GIVE
YOU A FREE DONUT,
37
00:02:06,305 --> 00:02:08,639
BUT FIRST WE'LL HAVE TO GIVE
YOU A CHOLESTEROL TEST.
38
00:02:08,674 --> 00:02:11,493
- FORGET IT.
IF I GIVE BLOOD, I WANT CASH.
39
00:02:13,746 --> 00:02:16,713
- THIS IS BO MERCURY,
YOUR WANDERING WEATHERMAN.
40
00:02:16,749 --> 00:02:20,250
LIVE AND WELL FROM THE
DADE COUNTY HEALTH FAIR.
41
00:02:20,286 --> 00:02:23,053
COME ON DOWN AND GET
YOURSELVES CHECKED OUT.
42
00:02:23,088 --> 00:02:25,022
AND FOR THE
FIRST 100 OF YOU
43
00:02:25,057 --> 00:02:27,691
THAT STOP BY
THE WKJH BOOTH,
44
00:02:27,726 --> 00:02:31,028
A FREE BO MERCURY
THERMOMETER.
45
00:02:34,733 --> 00:02:36,378
- I JUST LOVE
THAT GUY.
46
00:02:36,412 --> 00:02:37,412
- SEE?
47
00:02:37,459 --> 00:02:39,698
SEE, I TOLD YOU THERE'D BE
CELEBRITIES ALL OVER THE PLACE.
48
00:02:39,746 --> 00:02:42,313
- I DO THE TREADMILL BIT,
CRACK A FEW JOKES,
49
00:02:42,348 --> 00:02:45,188
AND THAT'LL LEAD
RIGHT INTO THE, UH...
50
00:02:45,628 --> 00:02:46,969
HEY!
51
00:02:50,090 --> 00:02:53,191
- EXCUSE ME, MR. MERCURY.
- HI, LITTLE LADY.
52
00:02:53,226 --> 00:02:54,592
WANNA JOIN ME
FOR A WALK?
53
00:02:54,627 --> 00:02:56,678
I CAN GUARANTEE YOU
IT WON'T RAIN!
54
00:02:57,356 --> 00:02:58,996
- ACTUALLY I'S
WONDERIN' IF YOU COULD
55
00:02:59,032 --> 00:03:01,165
TAKE A LITTLE STROLL
OVER THERE
56
00:03:01,201 --> 00:03:04,302
TO MEET MY FRIEND
DR. MAXINE DOUGLAS.
57
00:03:04,337 --> 00:03:06,709
- OH, CUTE.
58
00:03:07,140 --> 00:03:09,207
- AND SHE'S YOUR
A-NUMBER-ONE FAN.
59
00:03:09,242 --> 00:03:10,508
- SMART TOO.
60
00:03:10,543 --> 00:03:11,776
[laughing]
61
00:03:11,811 --> 00:03:13,527
SURE, I'LL
SAY HELLO.
62
00:03:14,180 --> 00:03:16,080
UH, COME ON, GUYS.
WE'RE ON THE MOVE.
63
00:03:16,116 --> 00:03:18,583
- NO, I AM NOT TAKING
BLOOD FROM YOUR EAR.
64
00:03:18,618 --> 00:03:20,987
IF YOU WANT IT PIERCED,
GO TO THE MALL.
65
00:03:22,322 --> 00:03:24,805
- DOCTOR'S I GOT
SOMEONE WANNA SAY HEY.
66
00:03:25,220 --> 00:03:27,024
- HEY!
IT'S YOU!
67
00:03:27,060 --> 00:03:28,913
MAXINE, LOOK
WHO'S HERE.
68
00:03:28,935 --> 00:03:30,842
- OW!
GEEZ, HARRY!
69
00:03:31,935 --> 00:03:33,103
OH, MY GOD.
70
00:03:33,139 --> 00:03:34,305
- HI, THERE.
71
00:03:34,340 --> 00:03:37,570
- UH...UH...
72
00:03:39,438 --> 00:03:40,611
DONUT?
73
00:03:41,013 --> 00:03:42,317
- [chuckling] THANKS,
BUT WE'RE ON AGAIN
74
00:03:42,364 --> 00:03:43,514
IN A COUPLE
OF SECONDS.
75
00:03:43,549 --> 00:03:46,286
DON'T WANT THIS SMILE
SPECKLED WITH SPRINKLES.
76
00:03:46,786 --> 00:03:50,454
- FIVE, FOUR,
THREE, TWO...
77
00:03:50,489 --> 00:03:51,911
- WHAT?
78
00:03:53,826 --> 00:03:55,125
- THIS IS
BO MERCURY AGAIN,
79
00:03:55,161 --> 00:03:57,394
LIVE AT THE
CANAL STREET CLINIC BOOTH,
80
00:03:57,430 --> 00:03:59,997
WHERE DR. MAXINE DOUGLAS
WAS JUST ABOUT
81
00:04:00,032 --> 00:04:02,666
TO TELL ME THE
IMPORTANCE OF FREE DONUTS
82
00:04:02,702 --> 00:04:04,969
AND...UM...
83
00:04:05,004 --> 00:04:07,538
CHOLESTEROL SCREENING.
84
00:04:10,538 --> 00:04:13,010
- UH...WELL...
85
00:04:13,045 --> 00:04:16,586
IT'S A GOOD WAY
TO, UH, PREVENT...
86
00:04:17,746 --> 00:04:20,778
LORD, YOU ARE SO MUCH
BETTER LOOKIN' IN PERSON.
87
00:04:26,293 --> 00:04:29,093
- FOLKS, YOU HAVE JUST
WITNESSED A MEDICAL MIRACLE.
88
00:04:29,128 --> 00:04:30,761
APPARENTLY I'M
BETTER LOOKING
89
00:04:30,796 --> 00:04:33,097
JUST BY WALKING UP
TO THIS BOOTH.
90
00:04:33,132 --> 00:04:36,934
WHO KNOWS WHAT THEY
CAN DO FOR YOU!
91
00:04:37,837 --> 00:04:39,338
- AND...WE'RE OUT.
92
00:04:39,739 --> 00:04:42,606
- OH, I'M SO
EMBARRASSED.
93
00:04:42,642 --> 00:04:45,299
I'M SORRY.
- OH, NO, YOU WERE GREAT!
94
00:04:45,511 --> 00:04:47,763
LOOK, MAXINE.
I GOTTA TAPE ANOTHER SEGMENT.
95
00:04:47,806 --> 00:04:50,374
BUT, UH, I'D LIKE TO
TALK TO YOU SOME MORE.
96
00:04:51,185 --> 00:04:53,050
- REALLY?
- YEAH.
97
00:04:53,085 --> 00:04:56,319
- HERE'S HER NUMBERS.
HOME, WORK, AND BEEPER.
98
00:04:57,023 --> 00:04:59,961
I'D ADVISE YOU TO GET YOUR
BID IN EARLY FOR FRIDAY NIGHT.
99
00:05:00,086 --> 00:05:01,892
- THAT'S ENOUGH, LAVERNE.
100
00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:04,227
- UM, I'LL GIVE YOU
A CALL REAL SOON.
101
00:05:04,630 --> 00:05:06,738
BYE.
- BYE.
102
00:05:09,635 --> 00:05:11,835
- SO YOU TWO GONNA
HAVE A BIG WEDDIN',
103
00:05:11,871 --> 00:05:13,382
OR JUST ELOPE?
104
00:05:15,041 --> 00:05:17,608
- OH, PLEASE.
THE MAN WAS JUST BEING KIND.
105
00:05:17,643 --> 00:05:20,183
BESIDES, I DON'T CARE
IF HE CALLS OR NOT.
106
00:05:22,490 --> 00:05:23,523
- MAX.
107
00:05:24,378 --> 00:05:26,050
YOU WANT ME TO GIVE
YOUR BEEPER A QUICK CALL,
108
00:05:26,085 --> 00:05:27,184
MAKE SURE
IT'S WORKING?
109
00:05:27,219 --> 00:05:28,760
- COULD YOU?
- YEAH, SURE.
110
00:05:33,793 --> 00:05:39,196
- DIE, DIE,
DIE, DIE--
111
00:05:39,231 --> 00:05:40,964
- SOPHIA, ARE YOU ALMOST
DONE WITH THAT GAME?
112
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,099
I NEED
THE COMPUTER.
113
00:05:42,134 --> 00:05:43,184
- WHAT GAME?
114
00:05:43,223 --> 00:05:45,527
I'M WRITING A LETTER
TO THE PHONE COMPANY.
115
00:05:48,407 --> 00:05:50,641
- SORRY, I'M ON A
PRETTY TIGHT DEADLINE.
116
00:05:50,676 --> 00:05:53,202
I HAVE TO FINISH THIS ARTICLE
ON NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS.
117
00:05:53,246 --> 00:05:56,680
- OH, THE LAST TIME I MADE
A RESOLUTION WAS 1968.
118
00:05:56,716 --> 00:05:59,123
I RESOLVED TO LOSE
AN INCH A YEAR.
119
00:06:00,953 --> 00:06:03,003
I MEANT FROM
MY HIPS.
120
00:06:09,115 --> 00:06:12,063
- CHARLIE, PLEASE.
MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME.
121
00:06:12,811 --> 00:06:14,932
- HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD
BE A NEAT INVENTION?
122
00:06:14,967 --> 00:06:17,738
A BEER CAN WHERE THE WHOLE TOP
COMES OFF SO YOU CAN DUNK.
123
00:06:21,474 --> 00:06:23,065
- GOOD IDEA.
124
00:06:23,133 --> 00:06:25,175
WHY DON'T YOU GO
HOME AND WORK ON IT?
125
00:06:25,211 --> 00:06:27,257
- HEY, NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS.
YOU WANNA HEAR MINE?
126
00:06:27,305 --> 00:06:28,378
- NO.
127
00:06:28,414 --> 00:06:32,616
- I RESOLVE TO END ALL WARS AND
FEED THE CHILDREN OF THE WORLD.
128
00:06:32,651 --> 00:06:34,152
- GET REAL.
129
00:06:34,574 --> 00:06:35,771
- OKAY, THEN.
130
00:06:35,892 --> 00:06:38,730
I RESOLVE TO
BOINK MORE CANADIANS.
131
00:06:40,142 --> 00:06:41,475
- SAVE YOUR
BREATH, SOPHIA.
132
00:06:41,510 --> 00:06:43,556
IT'S NOT AS IF THE BOOB HAS
ENOUGH SELF-DISCIPLINE
133
00:06:43,596 --> 00:06:45,529
TO KEEP A
REAL RESOLUTION.
134
00:06:45,865 --> 00:06:47,064
- LOOK WHO'S TALKING.
135
00:06:47,099 --> 00:06:49,873
MISS I-NEVER-MET-A-DIET
I-COULDN'T-CHEAT-ON.
136
00:06:51,937 --> 00:06:53,770
- WELL, WITH ALL THE
FOOD YOU EAT AROUND HERE,
137
00:06:53,806 --> 00:06:55,886
I DON'T NEED ONE, MOOCH.
138
00:06:56,649 --> 00:06:57,815
- POOCH.
139
00:06:57,861 --> 00:06:58,945
- PARASITE.
140
00:06:58,984 --> 00:07:00,119
- PARASAIL.
141
00:07:00,915 --> 00:07:02,326
- HEY, YOU'RE
GIVING ME A HEADACHE.
142
00:07:02,362 --> 00:07:03,461
SETTLE THIS
LIKE ADULTS.
143
00:07:03,496 --> 00:07:04,762
BET MONEY.
144
00:07:04,798 --> 00:07:06,005
- GOOD IDEA.
145
00:07:07,519 --> 00:07:08,853
20 BUCKS.
146
00:07:10,251 --> 00:07:11,857
WHAT ARE WE
BETTING ON?
147
00:07:12,972 --> 00:07:15,663
- YOU KNOW, THAT IS
A GOOD IDEA, SOPHIA.
148
00:07:15,909 --> 00:07:17,094
CHARLIE...
149
00:07:17,410 --> 00:07:21,345
I'LL BET YOU CAN'T GO
A WEEK WITHOUT MOOCHING.
150
00:07:21,381 --> 00:07:22,925
- YOU'RE ON.
- HA!
151
00:07:22,964 --> 00:07:24,615
WAIT TILL DADDY
HEARS THIS.
152
00:07:24,651 --> 00:07:27,585
- AND I BET YOU CAN'T GO A WEEK
WITHOUT CALLING YOUR DADDY...
153
00:07:27,620 --> 00:07:28,820
DADDY.
154
00:07:28,855 --> 00:07:31,422
- OH, SHALL I TAKE
THE MONEY NOW?
155
00:07:31,457 --> 00:07:32,487
- NO, I WILL.
156
00:07:32,519 --> 00:07:34,433
THAT WAY YOU KNOW
IT'S IN A SAFE PLACE.
157
00:07:34,512 --> 00:07:37,128
NOW, SHAKE HANDS.
I WANT A CLEAN FIGHT.
158
00:07:37,163 --> 00:07:39,737
NO HITTING BELOW THE BELT.
NO SPITTING, NO SMOKING.
159
00:07:40,867 --> 00:07:43,534
AND DON'T TALK TO THE DRIVER
WHILE THE BUS IS IN MOTION.
160
00:07:49,692 --> 00:07:51,100
- GARCON.
161
00:07:51,660 --> 00:07:53,704
POUR VOUS, MERCI.
162
00:07:55,364 --> 00:07:56,630
- SO, YOU
SPEAK FRENCH.
163
00:07:56,665 --> 00:07:59,232
- WELL, I HAVE NO
IDEA WHAT IT MEANS.
164
00:07:59,268 --> 00:08:02,313
BUT THAT AND $20 MAKES
THEM GO AWAY EVERY TIME.
165
00:08:04,219 --> 00:08:07,118
SO, DR. MAXINE DOUGLAS.
166
00:08:07,309 --> 00:08:09,020
DID YOU ALWAYS
WANNA BE A DOCTOR?
167
00:08:09,578 --> 00:08:12,678
- EVER SINCE I REALIZED
MY INITIALS WERE "M.D."
168
00:08:13,782 --> 00:08:15,983
- OH, HEY.
HOW YOU DOIN'.
169
00:08:16,018 --> 00:08:18,192
HI THERE.
HEH-HEH.
170
00:08:19,555 --> 00:08:20,754
- FRIENDS OF YOURS?
171
00:08:20,789 --> 00:08:23,595
- WELL, IN A WAY.
YOU KNOW, FANS.
172
00:08:24,693 --> 00:08:27,527
OH, HI.
NICE HAIRCUT.
173
00:08:27,563 --> 00:08:29,082
CUTE SWEATER.
174
00:08:29,406 --> 00:08:30,697
KEEP WATCHING.
175
00:08:31,484 --> 00:08:33,002
- LEAVE US ALONE.
176
00:08:34,612 --> 00:08:36,211
SO DOES THIS HAPPEN
EVERYWHERE YOU GO?
177
00:08:36,256 --> 00:08:37,255
- WELL--
178
00:08:37,290 --> 00:08:39,924
- EXCUSE US, BO.
COULD WE GET A PICTURE?
179
00:08:39,959 --> 00:08:41,451
- MAXINE,
DO YOU MIND?
180
00:08:47,267 --> 00:08:49,126
- WE LOVE YOU, BO.
181
00:08:49,658 --> 00:08:51,212
YOU TREAT HIM
RIGHT, NOW.
182
00:08:51,504 --> 00:08:52,753
- I'LL TRY.
183
00:08:53,039 --> 00:08:55,454
IF I EVER GET
THE CHANCE.
184
00:08:56,276 --> 00:08:57,875
- I'M SORRY, MAXINE.
185
00:08:57,911 --> 00:09:00,778
I KNOW THAT THIS FAN STUFF
CAN GET PRETTY DISTRACTING.
186
00:09:01,722 --> 00:09:02,747
- A LITTLE.
187
00:09:02,782 --> 00:09:05,116
- WELL, I DON'T WANT
ANYTHING TO INTERFERE
188
00:09:05,151 --> 00:09:07,985
WITH US GETTING TO
KNOW EACH OTHER BETTER.
189
00:09:13,159 --> 00:09:15,886
- MAY I HAVE
MY HAND BACK?
190
00:09:16,129 --> 00:09:18,263
I NEED ONE OF
MY FINGERS.
191
00:09:23,385 --> 00:09:26,185
- ALL RIGHT.
GOOD FOR MAXINE.
192
00:09:26,221 --> 00:09:28,121
- WHAT'S GOOD
FOR MAXINE?
193
00:09:28,156 --> 00:09:33,192
- "LET THE SKY PRECIPITATE, I
DON'T CARE, MY MAXINE'S GREAT."
194
00:09:33,228 --> 00:09:34,627
- OH, GEEZ.
195
00:09:34,662 --> 00:09:35,928
HE MUST HAVE LEFT
A DOZEN OF THESE
196
00:09:35,964 --> 00:09:38,394
DORKY RHYMES ON MY
MACHINE THIS MORNING.
197
00:09:38,775 --> 00:09:40,241
WHAT'S WRONG
WITH HIM?
198
00:09:40,990 --> 00:09:43,003
-
HE LIKES YOU.
199
00:09:43,876 --> 00:09:46,408
-
WELL, HE SHOULDN'T.
200
00:09:46,828 --> 00:09:48,527
TOLD HIM LAST NIGHT
I WASN'T INTERESTED.
201
00:09:48,563 --> 00:09:50,496
HE'S JUST A
PHONY CELEBRITY.
202
00:09:50,531 --> 00:09:52,320
[phone ringing]
203
00:09:52,934 --> 00:09:54,300
- CANAL STREET CLINIC.
204
00:09:54,335 --> 00:09:55,587
OH, HI.
205
00:09:55,954 --> 00:09:57,913
IT'S YOUR BEAU, BO.
206
00:09:58,957 --> 00:10:00,864
YEAH, SHE'S
RIGHT HERE.
207
00:10:01,025 --> 00:10:01,991
UH-HUH.
208
00:10:02,026 --> 00:10:03,092
OH, OKAY.
209
00:10:03,127 --> 00:10:04,961
ALL RIGHT.
BYE-BYE.
210
00:10:04,996 --> 00:10:06,529
HE DIDN'T WANT TO
TALK TO YOU EITHER.
211
00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:08,101
- WELL, GOOD.
212
00:10:08,151 --> 00:10:11,568
HE JUST WANTS YOU TO TURN ON
THE TV IN EXACTLY 30 SECONDS.
213
00:10:12,470 --> 00:10:14,437
- LAVERNE, WE DON'T
HAVE A TV.
214
00:10:14,472 --> 00:10:15,605
- WE DO NOW.
215
00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:17,783
BO HAD IT DELIVERED
THIS MORNING.
216
00:10:18,309 --> 00:10:19,578
- WHAT?
217
00:10:22,471 --> 00:10:24,313
OH, MY GOD.
218
00:10:24,349 --> 00:10:27,950
- WHOA!
STEREO!
219
00:10:28,525 --> 00:10:30,091
- LISTEN TO THIS.
220
00:10:30,144 --> 00:10:31,923
"BECAUSE YOU MEAN
SO MUCH TO ME,
221
00:10:31,971 --> 00:10:34,464
HERE'S A
19-INCH TV."
222
00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:38,367
I THINK THAT IS THE
MOST ROMANTIC THING.
223
00:10:38,630 --> 00:10:40,696
- HE'S JUST
SHOWING OFF.
224
00:10:40,732 --> 00:10:41,931
- [TV newswoman]
AND THAT ACCIDENT ON I-95
225
00:10:41,966 --> 00:10:43,266
HAS JUST
BEEN CLEARED.
226
00:10:43,301 --> 00:10:44,667
BACK TO YOU, BO.
227
00:10:44,702 --> 00:10:47,103
- THANKS,
TRAFFIC TERRY.
228
00:10:47,138 --> 00:10:48,604
AND NOW FOR
THE WEATHER.
229
00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:50,973
SUNNY, SUNNY,
STICKY, STICKY.
230
00:10:51,009 --> 00:10:53,943
SUNNY, SUNNY...HURRICANE.
231
00:10:53,978 --> 00:10:56,648
STICKY,
STICKY, SUNNY.
232
00:10:57,148 --> 00:10:58,814
WHY DO WE
LIVE HERE?
233
00:10:58,850 --> 00:11:00,316
WELL, I KNOW
WHY I DO.
234
00:11:00,351 --> 00:11:02,893
DR. MAXINE DOUGLAS.
235
00:11:04,455 --> 00:11:05,753
- AAH!
236
00:11:07,025 --> 00:11:09,344
THAT'S MY
DRIVER'S LICENSE PICTURE.
237
00:11:09,416 --> 00:11:10,860
HOW DID YOU
GET THAT?
238
00:11:10,895 --> 00:11:13,696
- AND THANKS TO MY PALS
EDUARDO AND ERNIE
239
00:11:13,731 --> 00:11:15,770
DOWN AT
THE DMV.
240
00:11:16,567 --> 00:11:18,267
NOW BACK TO
THE WEATHER.
241
00:11:18,303 --> 00:11:21,470
WELL, IT SEEMS A SEVERE
COLD FRONT HAS DEVELOPED
242
00:11:21,506 --> 00:11:23,306
BETWEEN
MAXINE AND ME.
243
00:11:23,341 --> 00:11:25,107
APPARENTLY SHE HASN'T
DISCOVERED THE CHARM
244
00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:29,979
THAT YOU, MY LOYAL FANS,
HAVE COME TO KNOW AND LOVE.
245
00:11:30,014 --> 00:11:32,608
I JUST WISH THAT THERE
WAS SOME WAY YOU
246
00:11:32,645 --> 00:11:36,246
COULD LET HER KNOW
THAT I'M AN OKAY GUY.
247
00:11:37,221 --> 00:11:39,692
GEE, I--I WONDER HOW
YOU COULD DO THAT?
248
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:47,029
[phone ringing]
249
00:11:56,865 --> 00:11:59,951
- WE WOULDN'T BE GETTING
READY TO MOOCH, WOULD WE?
250
00:12:00,902 --> 00:12:02,281
- NO, ACTUALLY.
251
00:12:02,550 --> 00:12:03,852
SMOOCH.
252
00:12:05,507 --> 00:12:07,048
SEE YOU SOON.
253
00:12:07,909 --> 00:12:08,875
[oven timer ringing]
254
00:12:08,910 --> 00:12:12,011
- OH, MY CINNAMON BUNS
ARE READY.
255
00:12:12,047 --> 00:12:13,336
- CINNAMON BUNS?
256
00:12:13,368 --> 00:12:16,908
- YES, MY SWEET,
SOFT CINNAMON BUNS.
257
00:12:16,952 --> 00:12:18,818
BURSTING
WITH PECANS,
258
00:12:18,853 --> 00:12:22,723
AND DRIPPING WITH
EXTRA CREAMY ICING.
259
00:12:23,758 --> 00:12:26,960
- YOU KNOW, IF YOU OFFERED ME
ONE IT WOULDN'T BE MOOCHING.
260
00:12:26,995 --> 00:12:29,352
- YES, I'VE
THOUGHT OF THAT.
261
00:12:30,865 --> 00:12:33,504
MMM.
262
00:12:34,169 --> 00:12:37,570
YOU KNOW, I'VE MADE
SO MANY, REALLY.
263
00:12:37,606 --> 00:12:39,059
WHAT'S THE HARM?
264
00:12:39,103 --> 00:12:40,764
DREYFIE!
265
00:12:41,176 --> 00:12:43,384
HERE YOU GO.
266
00:12:44,017 --> 00:12:45,895
CINNAMON BUNS,
CINNAMON BUNS.
267
00:12:45,947 --> 00:12:49,470
WOO-HOO-HOO-HOO.
- OH, I SMELL CINNAMON BUNS!
268
00:12:49,517 --> 00:12:53,297
- HELP YOURSELF,
DAA--AMN IT, THEY'RE HOT!
269
00:12:53,743 --> 00:12:56,469
- I'M SURPRISED THERE ARE
ANY LEFT WITH CHARLIE HERE.
270
00:12:56,858 --> 00:12:59,578
- I ATE YESTERDAY...DADDY.
271
00:13:03,648 --> 00:13:04,931
- WHAT'S WITH
YOU TWO?
272
00:13:04,966 --> 00:13:08,346
- NOTHING,
DAA--ABNEY COLEMAN.
273
00:13:09,371 --> 00:13:11,404
YOU KNOW, IN A
CERTAIN LIGHT YOU LOOK
274
00:13:11,439 --> 00:13:14,296
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
LIKE DABNEY COLEMAN.
275
00:13:16,041 --> 00:13:19,679
- YEAH, I...I...
I GET THAT ALL THE TIME.
276
00:13:19,714 --> 00:13:21,447
COME ON, WHAT'S
GOING ON HERE?
277
00:13:21,483 --> 00:13:24,996
- CAROL, WHY DON'T YOU
TELL DADDY ABOUT OUR BET?
278
00:13:25,152 --> 00:13:26,543
- ALL RIGHT,
I WILL.
279
00:13:26,589 --> 00:13:32,046
BUT FIRST GET DAA--
MAN OVER DER SOME MILK.
280
00:13:32,175 --> 00:13:33,665
- OKAY.
281
00:13:36,081 --> 00:13:39,040
[heavy breathing]
282
00:13:53,184 --> 00:13:54,695
- OKAY, THANK YOU.
283
00:13:55,653 --> 00:13:57,369
WOW, LOOK AT
THIS PLACE.
284
00:13:57,655 --> 00:14:00,723
IT'S LIKE HE HAS THE WHOLE CITY
AFTER HER TO GO OUT WITH HIM.
285
00:14:00,759 --> 00:14:04,274
- I AIN'T SEEN THIS MANY FLOWERS
SINCE VELMA TUCKER DIED.
286
00:14:05,670 --> 00:14:07,263
- SHE MUST HAVE BEEN
VERY, VERY POPULAR.
287
00:14:07,298 --> 00:14:10,583
- NO, SHE JUST DIED
IN A FLOWER SHOP.
288
00:14:11,968 --> 00:14:13,302
HEY, I'LL PUT THESE
IN SOME WATER.
289
00:14:13,338 --> 00:14:14,901
- ALL RIGHT,
THANK YOU.
290
00:14:19,044 --> 00:14:21,564
- BECAUSE I DON'T WANT
TO GO OUT WITH HIM.
291
00:14:21,713 --> 00:14:24,025
NOW TAKE THESE PILLS
THREE TIMES A DAY,
292
00:14:24,059 --> 00:14:25,959
AND MIND YOUR OWN
DAMN BUSINESS.
293
00:14:26,999 --> 00:14:28,925
HERE, HAVE A PLANT.
294
00:14:29,421 --> 00:14:31,554
[phone ringing]
295
00:14:31,589 --> 00:14:33,569
- CANAL STREET CLINIC.
296
00:14:34,359 --> 00:14:37,626
OH, HI, BO.
HOW ARE--HOLD ON.
297
00:14:37,671 --> 00:14:39,629
MAXINE, COME ON.
COME ON.
298
00:14:39,664 --> 00:14:41,230
HE'S BEEN CALLING
FOR TWO DAYS.
299
00:14:41,266 --> 00:14:44,033
- I DON'T CARE, HE'S A NUT.
I'M NOT GOING OUT WITH HIM.
300
00:14:44,069 --> 00:14:46,460
- FINE, WHAT SHOULD I TELL HIM?
- TELL HIM I'M BUSY.
301
00:14:46,497 --> 00:14:48,396
TELL HIM I'M
INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE.
302
00:14:48,434 --> 00:14:50,450
TELL HIM I'M
SLEEPING WITH YOU.
303
00:14:57,215 --> 00:14:59,488
- MAXINE IS
NOT HERE.
304
00:15:00,385 --> 00:15:03,714
WHY DON'T YOU CALL BACK LATER?
I'LL TELL HER YOU CALLED.
305
00:15:03,762 --> 00:15:06,219
- DON'T BOTHER,
I'LL TELL HER MYSELF.
306
00:15:07,982 --> 00:15:09,525
HI, MAXINE.
307
00:15:09,561 --> 00:15:10,693
I CALLED.
308
00:15:10,728 --> 00:15:12,829
- WELL, YOU GOT
THE WRONG NUMBER.
309
00:15:17,678 --> 00:15:20,584
- WELL, I THINK SHE'S
WARMING UP TO ME.
310
00:15:21,339 --> 00:15:24,128
- OH, GAH, BO.
YOU ARE A PERSISTENT MAN.
311
00:15:24,175 --> 00:15:27,990
- WELL, I REALLY LIKE HER.
BUT EVERYTHING I DO IS WRONG.
312
00:15:28,313 --> 00:15:32,248
- BO, LISTEN.
MAXINE IS A VERY PRIVATE PERSON.
313
00:15:32,283 --> 00:15:36,117
- OH, SO PUTTING HER PICTURE ON
TELEVISION WAS A BAD IDEA, HUH?
314
00:15:37,002 --> 00:15:39,588
- LET ME PUT THIS
IN MEDICAL TERMS.
315
00:15:39,624 --> 00:15:42,610
SHE WANTED TO RETURN
THAT TV SET TO YOU.
316
00:15:43,094 --> 00:15:47,129
IN A WAY THAT WOULD HAVE
CAUSED YOU GREAT DISCOMFORT.
317
00:15:51,544 --> 00:15:53,769
- OH, TONIGHT'S
THE BIG NIGHT, HUH?
318
00:15:53,805 --> 00:15:55,538
- IT'S JUST A
LOUSY SECOND DATE.
319
00:15:55,573 --> 00:15:58,140
I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET
HARRY TALK ME INTO THIS.
320
00:15:58,176 --> 00:15:59,375
- AW, YOU'RE
JUST NERVOUS.
321
00:15:59,410 --> 00:16:00,476
I KNOW HOW
YOU FEEL.
322
00:16:00,511 --> 00:16:02,678
BEFORE EVERY DATE
I USED TO BREAK OUT.
323
00:16:02,714 --> 00:16:03,713
HAD TO.
324
00:16:03,748 --> 00:16:05,781
MY DADDY LOCKED ME
IN MY ROOM.
325
00:16:14,959 --> 00:16:16,670
- HELLO, SUNSHINE.
326
00:16:17,295 --> 00:16:19,136
- OH...BO.
327
00:16:19,662 --> 00:16:20,979
HI.
328
00:16:22,133 --> 00:16:23,714
- LOOK, MAXINE.
329
00:16:23,859 --> 00:16:25,687
THANKS FOR GIVING ME
A SECOND CHANCE.
330
00:16:25,723 --> 00:16:28,277
I PROMISE YOU,
YOU WILL NOT REGRET THIS.
331
00:16:29,507 --> 00:16:30,949
THESE ARE
FOR YOU.
332
00:16:33,378 --> 00:16:34,343
- FLOWERS.
333
00:16:34,379 --> 00:16:36,190
HOW NICE.
334
00:16:37,081 --> 00:16:39,363
NOW I HAVE
ENOUGH FOR A FLOAT.
335
00:16:42,820 --> 00:16:45,821
- SO I THOUGHT THAT
WE WOULD GO SOMEWHERE
336
00:16:45,857 --> 00:16:47,156
WHERE WE WILL
NOT BE BOTHERED.
337
00:16:47,191 --> 00:16:48,597
- WHERE?
338
00:16:50,161 --> 00:16:51,761
- RIGHT HERE.
339
00:16:51,796 --> 00:16:54,330
BO, TELL THE LADY
WHAT SHE'S WON.
340
00:16:54,365 --> 00:16:57,235
[with host voice]
WHY, THANK YOU, BO!
341
00:16:57,635 --> 00:17:00,691
MAXINE IS BEING
WHISKED AWAY TO...
342
00:17:01,606 --> 00:17:04,006
THE FLOOR!
343
00:17:07,011 --> 00:17:09,812
FOR A ROMANTIC EVENING
WITH CHAMPAGNE,
344
00:17:09,847 --> 00:17:12,014
CHEESE, PATE,
MORE CHEESE,
345
00:17:12,049 --> 00:17:15,259
AND THESE LITTLE
PICKLE THINGIES!
346
00:17:16,889 --> 00:17:19,415
- YOU GOT ANY CHOCOLATE
IN THERE, I MIGHT STAY.
347
00:17:19,548 --> 00:17:21,754
- [normal voice]
BABY, I'M YOUR CHOCOLATE.
348
00:17:27,064 --> 00:17:29,144
ALL RIGHT,
HERE'S A MILKY WAY.
349
00:17:31,335 --> 00:17:35,377
- I'M SERIOUS, THE NEIGHBOR'S
DOG IS MAKING FUN OF DREYFUSS.
350
00:17:35,573 --> 00:17:36,972
I'LL TELL
YOU HOW.
351
00:17:37,008 --> 00:17:40,242
SHE JUST SITS THERE,
SMIRKING AT HIM.
352
00:17:40,278 --> 00:17:42,144
ANYWAY, DREYFUSS IS THE ONE
WHO SHOULD BE SMIRKING.
353
00:17:42,180 --> 00:17:44,419
WE HAVE THE
SWIMMING POOL.
354
00:17:45,416 --> 00:17:47,283
ALL RIGHT, I'LL
SEE YOU LATER.
355
00:17:47,318 --> 00:17:48,668
BYE, DADDY.
356
00:17:49,353 --> 00:17:50,500
OOPS.
357
00:17:50,788 --> 00:17:52,588
OH, WHAT
THE HELL.
358
00:17:52,623 --> 00:17:53,856
THE IDIOT
ISN'T HERE.
359
00:17:53,891 --> 00:17:56,325
- THE IDIOT
IS TOO!
360
00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:03,833
I HEARD THAT.
361
00:18:04,266 --> 00:18:05,836
HA!
YOU LOSE.
362
00:18:06,022 --> 00:18:08,336
- DAMN IT, I CAN'T
BELIEVE YOU BEAT ME!
363
00:18:08,399 --> 00:18:09,983
- HA, HA, HA!
364
00:18:10,274 --> 00:18:11,853
- CHARLIE...
365
00:18:12,810 --> 00:18:15,480
IS THAT BEER
ON YOUR BREATH?
366
00:18:18,783 --> 00:18:20,058
- NO.
367
00:18:21,210 --> 00:18:22,821
- THEN WHAT
IS THAT?
368
00:18:26,791 --> 00:18:28,271
- A BEER GUT?
369
00:18:29,360 --> 00:18:31,193
- SO WHILE I WAS
ON THE PHONE,
370
00:18:31,229 --> 00:18:33,195
YOU CHEATED FIRST.
371
00:18:33,231 --> 00:18:34,894
- YEAH, BUT I
CAUGHT YOU FIRST.
372
00:18:34,928 --> 00:18:36,127
- CHEATER!
- LIAR!
373
00:18:36,171 --> 00:18:37,633
- WEAKLING!
- GIRL.
374
00:18:37,668 --> 00:18:38,801
- HEY.
375
00:18:38,836 --> 00:18:41,022
KEEP IT DOWN, I JUST
GOT SCOTTY TO SLEEP.
376
00:18:41,081 --> 00:18:42,350
- I'M SORRY, SOPHIA.
377
00:18:42,390 --> 00:18:44,170
- HEY, THE BET'S OFF.
GIVE US OUR MONEY BACK.
378
00:18:44,202 --> 00:18:45,750
- THE BET WAS
ON FOR A WEEK.
379
00:18:45,786 --> 00:18:47,986
DON'T YOU PEOPLE HAVE
ANY SELF-CONTROL?
380
00:18:48,021 --> 00:18:49,310
- APPARENTLY NOT.
381
00:18:49,350 --> 00:18:51,756
- ME NEITHER, I LOST
YOUR MONEY AT THE TRACK.
382
00:18:54,463 --> 00:18:56,397
- SO IF WE
WERE OUTSIDE,
383
00:18:56,442 --> 00:18:58,591
SAGITTARIUS THE ARCHER
WOULD BE OVER THERE
384
00:18:58,638 --> 00:18:59,898
BY THE
SMOKE ALARM.
385
00:19:00,107 --> 00:19:02,791
AND THE VIRGIN VIRGO,
WOULD BE OVER THERE.
386
00:19:03,294 --> 00:19:04,723
- BY THAT
SPRINKLER HEAD?
387
00:19:04,772 --> 00:19:06,030
- UH-HUH.
388
00:19:06,747 --> 00:19:09,081
SEE, LEGEND HAS IT
THAT SAGITTARIUS
389
00:19:09,116 --> 00:19:12,384
HAS BEEN CHASING VIRGO
FOR MILLIONS OF YEARS.
390
00:19:12,419 --> 00:19:14,580
AND WHEN HE
FINALLY CATCHES HER,
391
00:19:14,922 --> 00:19:17,413
EVERYBODY ON EARTH
IS GONNA FALL IN LOVE.
392
00:19:17,939 --> 00:19:19,714
- OH, THAT'S ROMANTIC.
393
00:19:20,094 --> 00:19:22,589
IT'S A LOT OF HOOEY,
BUT IT'S ROMANTIC.
394
00:19:23,697 --> 00:19:27,822
- SO, UH, YOU WANNA MAKE
A WISH ON THE SMOKE ALARM?
395
00:19:28,463 --> 00:19:29,577
- OKAY.
396
00:19:32,015 --> 00:19:33,235
- [chuckling]
397
00:19:33,798 --> 00:19:35,180
- WHAT DID
YOU WISH FOR?
398
00:19:35,218 --> 00:19:38,019
- OH, I CAN'T TELL.
IT WON'T COME TRUE.
399
00:19:46,129 --> 00:19:48,570
HEY, THIS
HOOEY WORKS.
400
00:19:50,467 --> 00:19:52,826
- YOU KNOW, BO,
I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU
401
00:19:52,881 --> 00:19:54,913
I'M HAVING A
REAL NICE TIME.
402
00:19:55,079 --> 00:19:56,445
- SO AM I.
403
00:19:56,483 --> 00:19:58,483
- I CAN'T GET OVER
HOW DIFFERENT YOU ARE
404
00:19:58,519 --> 00:20:00,952
AWAY FROM ALL
THE FANS AND CAMERAS.
405
00:20:00,988 --> 00:20:02,824
- NEITHER CAN I.
406
00:20:03,490 --> 00:20:05,765
I HAVEN'T SIGNED
AN AUTOGRAPH ALL NIGHT.
407
00:20:05,795 --> 00:20:08,330
AND LOOK, MY HAND'S
NOT EVEN SHAKING.
408
00:20:08,796 --> 00:20:10,195
- YEAH, YOU'RE
DOING FINE.
409
00:20:10,239 --> 00:20:13,508
BUT, UH, YOUR
PULSE IS RACING.
410
00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:14,933
- REALLY?
411
00:20:14,968 --> 00:20:16,250
- IT'S OKAY.
412
00:20:16,703 --> 00:20:17,979
SO IS MINE.
413
00:20:18,105 --> 00:20:19,799
- [chuckling]
414
00:20:21,122 --> 00:20:24,046
SO DOES THIS MEAN THAT
THERE WILL BE A THIRD DATE?
415
00:20:24,832 --> 00:20:27,913
- I'D SAY THERE'S
A 99% PROBABILITY.
416
00:20:27,948 --> 00:20:30,056
- [laughing]
417
00:20:31,618 --> 00:20:33,118
OH, NO!
THE WEATHER!
418
00:20:33,153 --> 00:20:35,020
I GOTTA DO
MY FORECAST!
419
00:20:37,724 --> 00:20:39,024
- CAN YOU COME BACK?
420
00:20:39,059 --> 00:20:40,458
- BETTER YET,
421
00:20:40,494 --> 00:20:42,727
WHY DON'T I DO THE
FORECAST FROM HERE?
422
00:20:42,763 --> 00:20:44,296
- WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?
423
00:20:44,331 --> 00:20:47,065
- YEAH, I CAN PAGE MY CREW.
THEY'LL BE HERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
424
00:20:47,100 --> 00:20:48,466
- NO.
- YES.
425
00:20:48,502 --> 00:20:51,536
TRUST ME ON THIS, MAXINE.
THIS WILL BE GREAT TELEVISION.
426
00:20:51,572 --> 00:20:53,171
- SO THIS WHOLE
EVENING HAS BEEN
427
00:20:53,207 --> 00:20:56,012
SOME CHEAP STUNT
TO BOOST YOUR RATINGS?
428
00:20:56,543 --> 00:20:59,472
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
I ALMOST FELL FOR YOU.
429
00:21:01,634 --> 00:21:03,389
- OH, MAXINE, WAIT.
430
00:21:05,291 --> 00:21:07,158
- HARRY!
GET IN HERE!
431
00:21:07,246 --> 00:21:08,557
YOU'RE FAMOUS!
432
00:21:08,580 --> 00:21:10,060
- WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?
433
00:21:10,096 --> 00:21:11,798
HEY, IT'S
THE CLINIC!
434
00:21:11,838 --> 00:21:13,330
- AND THAT'S THE
WEATHER FOR TODAY.
435
00:21:13,366 --> 00:21:16,644
AND A 20% CHANCE
OF SHOWERS ON FRIDAY.
436
00:21:17,636 --> 00:21:19,298
- MY COFFEE MUG.
437
00:21:19,472 --> 00:21:21,494
LOOKS BIGGER ON TV.
438
00:21:23,655 --> 00:21:25,576
- NOW ON A
PERSONAL NOTE.
439
00:21:25,655 --> 00:21:27,077
I HAVE AN UPDATE
440
00:21:27,113 --> 00:21:29,713
ON THE BO MERCURY,
MAXINE DOUGLAS STORY.
441
00:21:29,749 --> 00:21:33,350
- BO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I TOLD YOU, SHE HATES THIS!
442
00:21:33,386 --> 00:21:36,320
- TONIGHT, MAXINE AND I
HAD OUR SECOND DATE.
443
00:21:36,355 --> 00:21:39,723
SO YOU CAN STOP THE CALLS AND
THE FLOWERS AND THE BALLOONS.
444
00:21:39,759 --> 00:21:41,759
BECAUSE THE
TRUTH IS...
445
00:21:41,794 --> 00:21:44,498
WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY
NOTHING IN COMMON.
446
00:21:44,697 --> 00:21:47,768
- [crying] THAT'S
THE SADDEST THING.
447
00:21:49,057 --> 00:21:51,877
IS THERE NO ROMANCE
IN THE WORLD ANYMORE?
448
00:21:52,204 --> 00:21:53,667
POOR GUY.
449
00:21:54,473 --> 00:21:56,203
LET'S GET HIM
A HOOKER.
450
00:21:58,944 --> 00:22:00,476
- AND...CLEAR.
451
00:22:01,347 --> 00:22:02,823
- WELL, THAT'S THAT.
452
00:22:02,882 --> 00:22:04,152
WHAT'D YOU THINK?
453
00:22:04,183 --> 00:22:05,680
- YOU WERE WONDERFUL.
454
00:22:06,183 --> 00:22:07,931
VERY CONVINCING.
455
00:22:08,519 --> 00:22:10,619
NOW MAYBE THEY'LL
GIVE US SOME PRIVACY.
456
00:22:10,654 --> 00:22:12,387
- PRIVACY WORKS.
457
00:22:12,423 --> 00:22:14,656
AS LONG AS I GET TO
SHARE IT WITH YOU.
458
00:22:22,434 --> 00:22:24,263
- OKAY BOYS,
HIT IT.
459
00:22:29,401 --> 00:22:31,201
JUST WANTED
TO SAY HI.
460
00:22:31,237 --> 00:22:32,438
- HI.
461
00:22:33,268 --> 00:22:34,946
- OKAY, TAKE
ME DOWN, BOYS.
462
00:22:34,996 --> 00:22:39,546
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