Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,935 --> 00:00:04,536
Cheers is filmed beforea live studio audience.
2
00:00:04,604 --> 00:00:06,138
Oh, shoot!
3
00:00:06,206 --> 00:00:07,973
It's a minus!
I'm not pregnant.
4
00:00:08,041 --> 00:00:09,575
Well, we only started
trying last night.
5
00:00:09,642 --> 00:00:10,676
I guess
we can't expect
6
00:00:10,744 --> 00:00:12,144
to get pregnant
the first time.
7
00:00:12,212 --> 00:00:13,245
Well, I thought
that's what the fourth
8
00:00:13,313 --> 00:00:16,181
and fifth times were for.
9
00:00:16,282 --> 00:00:18,584
Fifth time.
You imagine that?
10
00:00:18,651 --> 00:00:21,086
I'm only up to three.
11
00:00:22,789 --> 00:00:25,157
I just want to be
pregnant now.
12
00:00:25,225 --> 00:00:26,925
Rebecca, why don't you
approach this
13
00:00:26,993 --> 00:00:28,994
from a scientific point
of view?
14
00:00:29,062 --> 00:00:31,363
Make a simple
plot-point graph,
15
00:00:31,431 --> 00:00:32,898
and chart
your basal temperature
16
00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:34,433
at a fixed hour
each morning.
17
00:00:34,501 --> 00:00:37,202
After a couple of months,
a pattern will emerge,
18
00:00:37,303 --> 00:00:41,807
thereby making your peak
fertility days absolutely
predictable.
19
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,842
Good idea.
Thanks, Lilith!
20
00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:46,245
Whew, boy!
You guys went through all that?
21
00:00:46,312 --> 00:00:49,815
No, we just got ripped one night
and tore one off.
22
00:00:52,118 --> 00:00:55,521
Remember that,
sugar, huh?
23
00:00:58,058 --> 00:01:01,026
(theme song begins)
24
00:01:01,094 --> 00:01:04,329
# Making your way
in the world today #
25
00:01:04,397 --> 00:01:07,232
# Takes everything you've got #
26
00:01:07,300 --> 00:01:10,202
# Taking a break
from all your worries #
27
00:01:10,270 --> 00:01:12,204
# Sure would help a lot #
28
00:01:14,007 --> 00:01:16,742
# Wouldn't you like
to get away? #
29
00:01:18,712 --> 00:01:21,547
# Sometimes you want to go #
30
00:01:21,614 --> 00:01:26,919
# Where everybody
knows your name #
31
00:01:26,986 --> 00:01:31,590
# And they're always
glad you came #
32
00:01:31,658 --> 00:01:33,892
# You wanna be
where you can see #
33
00:01:33,960 --> 00:01:36,328
# Our troubles
are all the same #
34
00:01:36,396 --> 00:01:40,766
# You wanna be where
everybody knows your name #
35
00:01:42,168 --> 00:01:44,403
# You wanna go
where people know #
36
00:01:44,471 --> 00:01:46,972
# People are all the same #
37
00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:50,843
# You wanna go where
everybody knows your name. #
38
00:02:09,362 --> 00:02:11,530
Look, guys,
postcards from Woody.
39
00:02:11,598 --> 00:02:12,531
Eh?
40
00:02:12,599 --> 00:02:13,565
Eh?
41
00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:16,368
Hey, all right.
42
00:02:16,503 --> 00:02:17,970
Listen to mine.
43
00:02:18,038 --> 00:02:20,506
"Dear Miss Howe, I'm having
a great time on vacation.
44
00:02:20,573 --> 00:02:23,575
"I miss everyone there,
but I miss you most of all.
45
00:02:23,643 --> 00:02:24,610
Love, Woody."
46
00:02:24,678 --> 00:02:25,978
What does yours say, Sam?
47
00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:28,313
"Dear Sam, I'm having a great
time on vacation.
48
00:02:28,381 --> 00:02:31,917
"I miss everyone there,
but I miss you most of all.
49
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:34,953
Love, Woody."
50
00:02:35,021 --> 00:02:36,655
"I'm having
a great time
on vacation.
51
00:02:36,723 --> 00:02:38,490
"I miss everyone there,
but I miss you most
of all. Love, Woody."
52
00:02:39,959 --> 00:02:41,193
Cliffie?
53
00:02:41,327 --> 00:02:42,561
Well, "Dear Mr. Clavin,
54
00:02:42,629 --> 00:02:44,329
"I'm having a great time
on vacation.
55
00:02:44,397 --> 00:02:46,198
Love, Woody."
56
00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:53,205
Hey, Frasier,
Lilith.
57
00:02:53,273 --> 00:02:54,373
What'll you have?
58
00:02:54,441 --> 00:02:55,874
A scotch, Sam.
59
00:02:55,942 --> 00:02:58,243
And whatever my Neanderthal
husband will have.
60
00:02:58,311 --> 00:02:59,845
You two fighting?
61
00:02:59,913 --> 00:03:01,413
No, on the contrary,
Sam,
62
00:03:01,481 --> 00:03:04,183
I insist that
she call me that.
63
00:03:04,284 --> 00:03:08,320
Frasier's been captivated
by a new theory of masculinity
64
00:03:08,388 --> 00:03:12,124
which suggests within each man
is a hidden primal beast,
65
00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:15,794
softened by years
of civilization
and sensitivity.
66
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:18,130
He saw it on Sally Jesse.
67
00:03:19,499 --> 00:03:22,901
Yes, and they got a really cool
name for this beast.
68
00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:25,037
It's called
the "Inner Hairy Man."
69
00:03:26,439 --> 00:03:30,009
Or in your case, dear,
"The Receding Hairy Man."
70
00:03:30,076 --> 00:03:31,443
She thinks it's all
very childish.
71
00:03:31,511 --> 00:03:32,845
No, I don't.
72
00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:34,313
Oh, tell your
little friends
73
00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:35,914
all about your
big field trip.
74
00:03:35,982 --> 00:03:38,050
Primal journey, Lilith.
75
00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:41,086
You see, I'm just gonna
get into my car and go.
76
00:03:41,154 --> 00:03:42,121
Out on the open road.
77
00:03:42,188 --> 00:03:43,956
I'm taking a week off.
78
00:03:44,024 --> 00:03:46,358
I'm gonna get in touch
with my hidden beast.
79
00:03:46,459 --> 00:03:48,193
Ah, good luck.
80
00:03:48,328 --> 00:03:49,595
Thanks, Sam.
81
00:03:49,662 --> 00:03:51,296
You know, actually I was gonna
invite you to join me.
82
00:03:51,364 --> 00:03:52,431
You see, I get
a little nervous
83
00:03:52,499 --> 00:03:54,733
when I drive at night.
84
00:03:54,801 --> 00:03:58,070
Oh, yeah, it'd be nice, but, uh,
Woody's on vacation, you know.
85
00:03:58,171 --> 00:04:00,406
CARLA:
Oh, well, that's
okay, Sammy.
86
00:04:00,473 --> 00:04:02,074
I could get my nephew
Frankie to help out.
87
00:04:02,142 --> 00:04:04,410
He's a good kid,
real sweet, Frankie.
88
00:04:04,477 --> 00:04:06,779
Of course,
he's never been in a bar,
89
00:04:06,846 --> 00:04:08,514
but he'll be okay.
90
00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:09,782
Oh, I don't know about this.
91
00:04:09,849 --> 00:04:11,450
You know, this is my livelihood,
my business.
92
00:04:11,518 --> 00:04:12,918
I don't want
to just turn it over
93
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,186
to somebody because
they're family.
94
00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:16,321
He'll work for minimum wage.
95
00:04:16,389 --> 00:04:18,390
I'm in!
Great!
96
00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:19,858
Great.
97
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:21,860
Hey, this is great.
So, uh, where are we gonna go?
98
00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:23,429
Desert? Mountains?
99
00:04:23,496 --> 00:04:25,531
Well, actually, Sam,
the location doesn't
really matter.
100
00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:28,801
This is more of a
spiritual journey,
101
00:04:28,868 --> 00:04:31,503
an heroic quest.
102
00:04:31,571 --> 00:04:33,205
You know, you know, if we, uh,
drive to California,
103
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:34,440
we could go see Disneyland.
104
00:04:34,541 --> 00:04:36,608
Ooh!
Yeah.
105
00:04:36,676 --> 00:04:40,045
Perhaps you could find your
manhood on the giant teacups.
106
00:04:42,382 --> 00:04:44,583
Yeah, a road trip
to Disneyland.
107
00:04:44,651 --> 00:04:46,085
Sounds fun.
108
00:04:46,152 --> 00:04:48,220
You want to join us, Norm?
109
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:50,956
Well (stammers)...
110
00:04:51,024 --> 00:04:53,092
I'm sure you two gentlemen
have something to do.
111
00:04:53,193 --> 00:04:54,360
Oh, no problemo.
112
00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:55,794
I got a couple of weeks vacation
coming up.
113
00:04:55,862 --> 00:05:00,699
Really?
Oh, yeah, my supervisor
reminds me daily.
114
00:05:00,767 --> 00:05:02,234
Well, Cliff, I, uh,
115
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:04,136
I don't know if my car is
big enough...
116
00:05:04,237 --> 00:05:06,372
Oh, let's take my wagon.
What do you say, Norm? Huh?
117
00:05:06,439 --> 00:05:08,173
The four of us tooling
down old mother road,
118
00:05:08,241 --> 00:05:10,476
getting in touch with
the old hairy man-mobile, huh?
119
00:05:10,577 --> 00:05:12,344
I don't know.
I don't think I could handle
120
00:05:12,412 --> 00:05:14,413
sitting still
for six hours a day.
121
00:05:15,949 --> 00:05:18,984
Well, yeah,
it'd be more like ten.
122
00:05:19,052 --> 00:05:20,185
Oh, then I'm in.
123
00:05:21,554 --> 00:05:22,988
SAM:
Boy, I'll never forget,
124
00:05:23,089 --> 00:05:25,457
when I was 19,
Buck, my best friend--
125
00:05:25,525 --> 00:05:27,593
he was a teammate of mine
in the minors--
126
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:30,462
he and I, uh, hitchhiked
all across Route 66.
127
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:31,797
Boy, best time
of my life.
128
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:33,298
Yeah?
Do they still have the place
129
00:05:33,366 --> 00:05:35,000
where the Cadillacs are
sticking up out of the ground?
130
00:05:35,068 --> 00:05:36,702
Oh, yeah, Cadillac Ranch,
in Merrimac Caverns.
131
00:05:36,770 --> 00:05:37,970
All right.
132
00:05:38,038 --> 00:05:39,304
Yeah, once I lost
a Hopalong Cassidy watch there
133
00:05:39,372 --> 00:05:40,472
when I was ten.
134
00:05:40,540 --> 00:05:42,074
Yeah, it just slipped
right off my wrist.
135
00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:43,876
Yeah, you wouldn't believe it,
136
00:05:43,943 --> 00:05:46,745
but as a youth,
I had very fine-boned wrists.
137
00:05:46,813 --> 00:05:50,215
I can't tell you how many
people mistook me for royalty.
138
00:05:50,283 --> 00:05:52,151
It's true.
139
00:05:53,586 --> 00:05:55,587
Oh, what the hell!
We'll make it a group thing.
140
00:05:55,655 --> 00:05:56,922
All of us will get out
and try to get in touch
141
00:05:56,990 --> 00:05:58,791
with our tribal
instincts.
There you go.
142
00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:01,260
Oh, give me strength.
143
00:06:01,327 --> 00:06:03,162
Oh, come on, Lilith,
be happy for us.
144
00:06:03,229 --> 00:06:04,830
We're all dropping
our inhibitions.
145
00:06:04,931 --> 00:06:07,333
We're gonna go out and find
our manhood on the open road.
146
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:08,300
Yeah, like men!
147
00:06:08,401 --> 00:06:09,868
Yeah, like manly men!
Real men!
148
00:06:09,969 --> 00:06:11,670
Like those chicks
in Thelma and Louise!
149
00:06:11,738 --> 00:06:13,972
(cheering)
150
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:16,475
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
What happened here?
151
00:06:16,576 --> 00:06:18,243
Ah, the eight track's acting up
again there, Sammy.
152
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:19,778
Grab the butter knife
153
00:06:19,846 --> 00:06:21,280
out of the glove compartment,
will you?
154
00:06:22,615 --> 00:06:24,917
Yeah.
There you go.
155
00:06:24,984 --> 00:06:26,151
Here we are.
156
00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:28,320
Well, at least we still got
the A.M. radio.
157
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,823
So, how far
have we gone?
158
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,958
Oh, about
a hundred miles.
159
00:06:33,026 --> 00:06:33,959
Yeah.
160
00:06:34,027 --> 00:06:35,994
Well, it's
minus 38.
161
00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:37,296
Why minus 38?
162
00:06:37,364 --> 00:06:39,965
Well, my trip meter
only sets back to 38.
163
00:06:42,469 --> 00:06:46,338
Well, let's see.
What's a hundred minus 38?
164
00:06:46,439 --> 00:06:48,674
Well, why don't we just,
uh, drive 38 more miles?
165
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:49,875
Then we'll know
we've hit a hundred.
166
00:06:51,044 --> 00:06:53,412
Hey...
167
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:55,581
I didn't know
you were good at math.
168
00:06:55,648 --> 00:06:57,816
Yeah, well, you know,
I used to be an accountant.
169
00:06:59,519 --> 00:07:01,186
What you reading
there, Fras?
170
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,688
Oh, uh...
171
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,556
It's called
Iron John.
172
00:07:04,624 --> 00:07:07,693
It's a best-seller
about getting in touch
with one's masculinity.
173
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,328
Mmm.
174
00:07:09,396 --> 00:07:12,331
So you're actually gonna try
to read in a moving car?
175
00:07:12,399 --> 00:07:13,799
Doesn't that make you sick?
176
00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:15,601
No.
177
00:07:15,669 --> 00:07:18,003
I always get sick
when I read in a car.
178
00:07:18,071 --> 00:07:20,472
The car bounces around,
179
00:07:20,540 --> 00:07:23,809
you know, your eyes try
to follow the words there.
180
00:07:23,877 --> 00:07:25,411
You can smell
the gas fumes.
181
00:07:25,478 --> 00:07:28,247
Pretty soon, you start sweating
and gasping for breath.
182
00:07:28,314 --> 00:07:29,748
What's the problem?
183
00:07:29,816 --> 00:07:31,483
I'm sick.
184
00:07:31,551 --> 00:07:34,887
You know, I'll bet it's
from reading in the car.
185
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:37,189
I'm telling you.
186
00:07:49,436 --> 00:07:52,137
(inhales)
(moans)
187
00:07:54,441 --> 00:07:56,208
What?
188
00:07:56,276 --> 00:07:58,344
I didn't say anything.
189
00:07:58,411 --> 00:07:59,945
Yeah, but you were
thinking something.
190
00:08:00,013 --> 00:08:01,280
No, I wasn't.
191
00:08:01,381 --> 00:08:03,582
Yes, you think I have the
hots for Carla's nephew.
192
00:08:03,683 --> 00:08:04,783
I didn't say that.
193
00:08:04,851 --> 00:08:05,851
'Cause I do.
194
00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:07,920
No kidding?
195
00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:09,288
Oh, like you don't?
196
00:08:09,356 --> 00:08:10,556
You've only been
sitting there
197
00:08:10,623 --> 00:08:12,291
for the last four
days staring at him.
198
00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:14,226
And it's worse with you,
because you're married.
199
00:08:14,294 --> 00:08:16,061
That's slutty.
200
00:08:17,263 --> 00:08:18,831
And what about you?
201
00:08:18,898 --> 00:08:20,466
You're ogling him
and meanwhile,
202
00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:23,335
you're trying to conceive
a child with another man.
203
00:08:23,403 --> 00:08:25,838
Yes, but he is not my
husband, so that does
not make me a slut.
204
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,143
It's perfectly natural.
205
00:08:31,211 --> 00:08:32,444
One can be married
206
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,747
and still be drawn
to the odd magnificent butt.
207
00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:36,615
For once I'm with you, Doc.
208
00:08:36,716 --> 00:08:40,452
I agree, but you know
what I really notice in a guy?
209
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,388
His eyes.
210
00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:45,758
Yeah, but that magnificent
butt thing is right up there.
211
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:47,726
Yeah, well,
this guy has both.
212
00:08:47,794 --> 00:08:49,328
And talk about biceps.
213
00:08:49,396 --> 00:08:51,296
Whoa. You're
getting me hot.
214
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,498
Who are we talking
about here?
215
00:08:52,565 --> 00:08:54,733
Your nephew, Frankie.
216
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:02,107
That is so sick!
217
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:04,610
Carla, surely,
as a woman, you can see
218
00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:08,380
how your nephew might be
considered... desirable.
219
00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:10,215
Sure. You start
thinking like that,
220
00:09:10,283 --> 00:09:12,351
and you end up
with Woody's family.
221
00:09:17,457 --> 00:09:18,991
Just look at you two.
222
00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:21,293
You're acting like a couple
of construction workers.
223
00:09:23,263 --> 00:09:24,763
Carla's right,
Lilith.
224
00:09:24,831 --> 00:09:26,498
I mean, we're treating
men just the way
225
00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:28,467
we hate to be
treated by them.
226
00:09:31,438 --> 00:09:33,472
Oops, I dropped my purse.
227
00:09:33,540 --> 00:09:34,540
I'll get it for you.
228
00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:39,078
Here you go.
229
00:09:39,145 --> 00:09:40,212
Thank you.
You're welcome.
230
00:09:47,787 --> 00:09:50,589
Thank you again.
You're welcome.
231
00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:06,071
Okay, I got one.
232
00:10:06,239 --> 00:10:07,906
When was the last time
you guys cried?
233
00:10:07,974 --> 00:10:10,075
Huh? Cliffie?
234
00:10:10,176 --> 00:10:11,610
Uh... well, I guess the, uh,
235
00:10:11,678 --> 00:10:14,680
it's probably my,
uh, junior prom.
236
00:10:14,748 --> 00:10:17,149
Oh, no, no, no. Cliffie,
this is not that story where,
237
00:10:17,217 --> 00:10:19,318
uh, you got stood up
and you had to take your ma
238
00:10:19,386 --> 00:10:21,186
and everyone laughed at you
and pantsed you, is it?
239
00:10:21,254 --> 00:10:25,524
No, no, I said junior prom.
240
00:10:29,095 --> 00:10:32,264
Yeah, you see, Ma was
putting on a boutonniere,
241
00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:35,234
and a pin stuck me in the chest,
I got a staph infection.
242
00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:37,036
Hmm.
243
00:10:37,103 --> 00:10:38,470
How about you, Fras?
244
00:10:38,538 --> 00:10:40,939
Well, the day we left
for this trip,
245
00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:43,709
my son gave me a,
a picture.
246
00:10:43,777 --> 00:10:45,144
And you cried?
247
00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:47,646
I cried because
it was so beautiful.
248
00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:53,652
Good luck finding
that hairy man.
249
00:10:56,756 --> 00:11:01,160
Well, at least I can
get pricked by a pin
and not almost die.
250
00:11:01,227 --> 00:11:03,328
What about you, Norm?
251
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:05,998
Well, there was
one time, uh,
252
00:11:06,066 --> 00:11:09,935
we thought Vera was
pregnant, and...
253
00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:12,504
then it turns out she wasn't.
254
00:11:12,572 --> 00:11:14,840
I'm sorry, Norm.
255
00:11:14,908 --> 00:11:17,276
You never told me
that, buddy.
256
00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:19,211
Well, it turns out,
she was lying.
257
00:11:19,279 --> 00:11:22,348
She didn't tell me
till after the wedding.
258
00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:27,052
I must have cried for a week.
259
00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:29,855
How about you, Sam?
260
00:11:29,989 --> 00:11:32,358
Oh, you guys
should see him.
261
00:11:32,425 --> 00:11:34,593
(cooing):
He's sleeping
like a little baby.
262
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:35,928
Aw, it's so cute.
263
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,497
(tires screeching)
(yelling)
264
00:11:48,341 --> 00:11:51,043
What seems to be
the trouble, Sam?
265
00:11:51,111 --> 00:11:54,113
Well, I know a little bit
about engines, and...
266
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:56,081
it seems like what
we got here is
267
00:11:56,149 --> 00:11:58,050
a burned piece of meat.
268
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:03,822
Yeah, how is my, uh,
hobo steak coming?
269
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:06,658
Oh, yeah, well, I
threw that on the engine
270
00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:08,427
back in, uh, Lukachukai.
271
00:12:08,495 --> 00:12:11,663
At the risk of hearing
your answer, Cliff,
272
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,133
why would you do
something so stupid?
273
00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:15,734
Oh, well, you,
you cook in there.
274
00:12:15,802 --> 00:12:17,603
You see, you put your
food on the engine,
275
00:12:17,671 --> 00:12:19,872
and then you can drive
and cook at the same time.
276
00:12:19,939 --> 00:12:23,342
Oh, hey, it looks like the
vegetable kabobs are about done.
277
00:12:28,615 --> 00:12:31,517
Maybe they're a little
bit too crisp, huh?
278
00:12:33,553 --> 00:12:34,920
SAM:
Come on, let's
get back in the car
279
00:12:34,988 --> 00:12:36,689
and go find a motel, huh?
Yeah, all right.
280
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,724
Hey, Cliffie, I can't
turn the key here.
281
00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:41,560
Well, yeah, it's got a security
device on it there, Sam.
282
00:12:41,628 --> 00:12:43,529
Oh.
Yeah, what I do
is turn the wheel
283
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,497
all the way to the left
and then, uh,
284
00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:47,199
crank the key
as hard as I can.
285
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:48,434
(keys jangle)
286
00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:50,069
SAM:
Oh, man.
287
00:12:50,136 --> 00:12:52,504
Look at that. I just broke
the key off in the ignition.
288
00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:57,376
I said "as hard
as I can," Sammy.
289
00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:01,447
That's just great.
290
00:13:01,514 --> 00:13:03,148
What are we going to do now?
291
00:13:03,249 --> 00:13:05,417
Looks like I'm going to have
to hot-wire the car here.
292
00:13:05,485 --> 00:13:07,052
Hey, wh-what am
I thinking about?
293
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,220
I've had my cellular phone
294
00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:09,488
the whole time;
we can just call
295
00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:12,191
for help.
No, come on,
come on, come on, come on.
296
00:13:12,258 --> 00:13:13,826
Frasier, where's
your hairy man?
297
00:13:13,893 --> 00:13:15,661
We can save ourselves here.
298
00:13:16,896 --> 00:13:18,964
Yeah, hot-wiring's easy.
299
00:13:19,032 --> 00:13:20,232
Buck showed me
how to do it
300
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,434
on a trip
across the states.
301
00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:24,670
God, that guy was a whiz
with anything mechanical.
302
00:13:24,738 --> 00:13:25,704
Yeah, here you go.
303
00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:27,006
All you got to do is take
304
00:13:27,073 --> 00:13:28,841
these two wires here
and connect them.
305
00:13:28,908 --> 00:13:30,809
(electricity crackling)
306
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:38,884
You, you okay there, Sammy?
307
00:13:38,952 --> 00:13:40,486
Diane?
308
00:13:46,559 --> 00:13:48,827
Yeah, well, uh, you know
what your friend Buck, uh,
309
00:13:48,895 --> 00:13:50,562
didn't, uh, reckon
on there, Sammy,
310
00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:53,699
was that Cliff Clavin
anti-theft device.
311
00:13:53,767 --> 00:13:55,534
Yeah, you see
old Mr. Car Thief
312
00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:56,669
gets the shock of his life,
313
00:13:56,736 --> 00:14:00,039
the doors automatically
lock shut,
314
00:14:00,106 --> 00:14:01,373
and the alarm goes off.
315
00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:03,108
Wait a minute,
wait a minute.
316
00:14:03,176 --> 00:14:05,344
The doors lock
automatically?
317
00:14:05,412 --> 00:14:07,212
Yeah, but the alarm's
supposed to be going off.
318
00:14:07,313 --> 00:14:08,414
You know, it must
be on the fritz.
319
00:14:08,481 --> 00:14:10,315
Our ears should
be ringing by now.
320
00:14:10,383 --> 00:14:12,317
Oh, I'll just have
to do it manually.
321
00:14:12,385 --> 00:14:15,354
You locked us out of the car!
322
00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:19,291
(cell phone ringing)
323
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:21,827
My phone!
324
00:14:21,895 --> 00:14:23,128
My phone is ringing!
325
00:14:23,196 --> 00:14:24,329
All right!
326
00:14:24,397 --> 00:14:26,665
And the doors are locked!
327
00:14:26,733 --> 00:14:27,900
Well, break the damn window!
328
00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:29,101
Are you kidding me?!
329
00:14:29,169 --> 00:14:30,369
You know how much
those windows cost?
330
00:14:30,437 --> 00:14:31,904
We don't have time
to argue here, Cliff.
331
00:14:32,005 --> 00:14:33,405
You're not breaking
those windows.
332
00:14:33,473 --> 00:14:34,873
(ringing continues)
You just try it, young man.
333
00:14:34,941 --> 00:14:36,542
You're gonna have
to come through me...
(glass breaking)
334
00:14:36,609 --> 00:14:40,012
You're gonna pay for that,
I hope you know.
335
00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:41,680
(ringing continues)
336
00:14:41,748 --> 00:14:43,749
Hello? Hello?
337
00:14:43,817 --> 00:14:45,384
If it's Vera,
I'm not here.
338
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:49,855
Yes, this is Frasier Crane.
339
00:14:49,923 --> 00:14:51,523
Oh, thank God
somebody called.
340
00:14:51,591 --> 00:14:53,058
The batteries are
getting sort of low.
341
00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:54,727
Look, I don't
have much time.
342
00:14:54,794 --> 00:14:56,195
Excuse me?
343
00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:58,030
Y-Yes, I understand
the Democratic party's
344
00:14:58,098 --> 00:14:59,331
in trouble, and I'd
love to contribute,
345
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,400
but I'm in a little
trouble myself right now.
346
00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:03,802
Oh, damn!
347
00:15:03,870 --> 00:15:04,970
The batteries are dead!
348
00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:06,739
SAM:
All right. Okay.
349
00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:08,140
Let's, uh,
take it easy, Fras.
350
00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:10,042
Nobody panic.
We'll be all right.
351
00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:11,877
FRASIER:
Great.
352
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:14,246
We're lost, can't
start the car.
353
00:15:14,314 --> 00:15:16,148
Way to go, Sam.
354
00:15:16,216 --> 00:15:17,383
SAM:
Oh, now wait a minute.
355
00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:18,517
Don't blame me, you know.
356
00:15:18,585 --> 00:15:19,885
It's Cliff's fault for wanting
357
00:15:19,953 --> 00:15:22,888
to see America
like the pioneers.
358
00:15:22,956 --> 00:15:24,990
We should've stayed
on the main road.
359
00:15:25,058 --> 00:15:27,459
Did Charles Kuralt
stay on the main road?
360
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:28,794
Look, I'm not the one
361
00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:30,429
that fell asleep at the wheel.
362
00:15:30,497 --> 00:15:31,730
I wouldn't have fallen
asleep at the wheel
363
00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:33,065
if you hadn't given me
that extra shift.
364
00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:35,567
Well, we were behind schedule.
365
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:36,969
Yes, I believe that
was your fault
366
00:15:37,037 --> 00:15:39,438
for getting your fat butt lodged
in that cavern.
367
00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:42,875
Well, I was looking
for my Hopalong Cassidy watch.
368
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:44,410
Do you mind?!
369
00:15:44,477 --> 00:15:45,978
SAM:
Ah, come on, you guys.
370
00:15:46,079 --> 00:15:48,147
Can we stop arguing
for, like, ten seconds here?
371
00:15:48,214 --> 00:15:49,448
Geez, Buck and I went across
372
00:15:49,516 --> 00:15:51,650
the entire United States
and we didn't argue once.
373
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:53,519
You know, frankly, Sam,
I'm getting a little tired
374
00:15:53,586 --> 00:15:56,088
of hearing about Saint Buck!
375
00:15:57,657 --> 00:15:58,757
If he was so wonderful,
376
00:15:58,825 --> 00:16:00,159
how come none of us
has ever met him?
377
00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:02,261
Because ever since he got
into the Hall of Fame,
378
00:16:02,328 --> 00:16:04,530
he won't return my phone calls,
so I have to hang around
379
00:16:04,597 --> 00:16:06,765
a bunch of losers
in a stupid bar!
380
00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:09,201
Does that answer your
question, Mr. Hairy Man?!
381
00:16:14,207 --> 00:16:15,474
Oh, I'm sorry, guys.
382
00:16:15,542 --> 00:16:17,142
I didn't mean
anything by that.
383
00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:20,479
It's just that, well,
he asked the question.
384
00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:28,587
You know, I, I hate
to bring this up, but, uh...
385
00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:31,623
we could really be in some,
some serious trouble here.
386
00:16:31,691 --> 00:16:32,858
Oh, come on, man.
387
00:16:32,926 --> 00:16:34,693
Hey, listen,
at least we, uh,
388
00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:36,328
we've got each other
here, right?
389
00:16:36,396 --> 00:16:37,429
I mean, you know,
here we are
390
00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:39,531
out in the desert,
back to nature.
391
00:16:39,599 --> 00:16:41,000
I mean, look, look
at this air here.
392
00:16:41,067 --> 00:16:42,301
It's clear. It's fresh.
393
00:16:42,369 --> 00:16:43,969
I mean, isn't that
why we came out here
394
00:16:44,037 --> 00:16:45,471
in the first place?
Yeah, yeah.
395
00:16:45,538 --> 00:16:47,306
Look at the stars, guys.
396
00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:48,507
Look at that.
397
00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:50,309
Got to be a million
of 'em up there.
398
00:16:50,377 --> 00:16:52,644
Kind of makes you feel
insignificant, huh?
399
00:16:54,047 --> 00:16:55,981
Yeah, I don't
feel anything.
400
00:17:03,323 --> 00:17:04,556
(sighs)
401
00:17:05,759 --> 00:17:07,226
Frankie?
Yeah?
402
00:17:07,293 --> 00:17:08,794
I need you to move
those big boxes
403
00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:09,995
to the other side
of the poolroom.
404
00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,731
Gosh, Miss Howe,
it's the fifth time today.
405
00:17:14,034 --> 00:17:15,167
I'm getting kind of sweaty.
406
00:17:15,235 --> 00:17:17,169
Well, then take off
your shirt, you goose.
407
00:17:20,807 --> 00:17:22,274
I could have gone
with those guys
408
00:17:22,342 --> 00:17:23,709
on that little road trip,
you know.
409
00:17:23,777 --> 00:17:25,110
I know.
410
00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:27,379
I just wasn't here
when they decided to go.
411
00:17:27,447 --> 00:17:28,747
So you've said.
412
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:30,983
They, uh, probably
tried to call me
413
00:17:31,051 --> 00:17:32,885
and hung up on my machine.
Hmm.
414
00:17:32,952 --> 00:17:35,554
Sometimes it doesn't
record the hang-ups.
415
00:17:35,622 --> 00:17:37,556
Mm-hmm.
416
00:17:39,325 --> 00:17:41,026
You're not much
of a conversationalist, are you?
417
00:17:44,798 --> 00:17:46,565
Where is everybody?
418
00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:47,833
Probably in
New Mexico by now.
419
00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:48,834
You know, I could've
gone with 'em
420
00:17:48,902 --> 00:17:50,936
if they'd just left a message.
421
00:17:51,037 --> 00:17:53,605
No, I-I was talking
about my nephew
422
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:56,342
and Rebecca
of Horny Brook Farm.
423
00:18:00,113 --> 00:18:01,447
They're in the back.
424
00:18:01,514 --> 00:18:03,315
Frankie's helping
her move some boxes.
425
00:18:03,383 --> 00:18:04,917
I'll just bet he is.
426
00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:06,452
You know, I'm getting
a little sick of the way
427
00:18:06,519 --> 00:18:08,287
she's throwing herself
all over that guy.
428
00:18:08,355 --> 00:18:09,855
I mean, it's disgusting.
429
00:18:09,923 --> 00:18:11,957
Carla, I've never
seen this side of you.
430
00:18:12,025 --> 00:18:13,092
Yeah, well...
431
00:18:13,193 --> 00:18:14,626
You know, Frankie's sweet.
432
00:18:14,694 --> 00:18:17,096
One day he's going to meet
a nice girl and settle down.
433
00:18:17,163 --> 00:18:18,864
And in the meantime,
it's my job
434
00:18:18,932 --> 00:18:20,699
to keep him
away from sleazy women
435
00:18:20,767 --> 00:18:22,401
looking for a quick one-nighter.
436
00:18:22,469 --> 00:18:24,269
You mean women like you?
437
00:18:24,337 --> 00:18:27,039
Ironic, huh?
438
00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:31,810
Oh, Frankie.
What?
439
00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:34,446
I thought I told you
to stay away from Rebecca.
440
00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:36,348
Look, the woman is a tramp.
441
00:18:36,416 --> 00:18:38,183
All she wants you for
is your body.
442
00:18:38,251 --> 00:18:40,419
Miss Howe? She seems so nice.
443
00:18:40,487 --> 00:18:41,620
(chuckling):
Are you kidding?
444
00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:44,156
She has had every man
in this bar.
445
00:18:44,224 --> 00:18:45,391
Every single one.
446
00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:47,326
What?
That's right. Most of 'em,
447
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:48,961
ten, 20 times.
448
00:18:49,029 --> 00:18:51,730
Look, you're a good boy,
Frankie. Now, go, go.
449
00:18:51,798 --> 00:18:53,265
Get out of here,
before it's too late.
450
00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:55,634
Now, go.
Run like the wind!
451
00:18:55,702 --> 00:18:57,136
Go! Don't ever
come back!
452
00:18:57,203 --> 00:18:58,604
I won't.
453
00:18:58,672 --> 00:19:01,140
You know what I'm going to do
on the way home?
What?
454
00:19:01,207 --> 00:19:02,908
I'm going to stop
at Saint Michael's,
455
00:19:02,976 --> 00:19:05,344
and I'm going to pray
for her soul.
456
00:19:07,847 --> 00:19:09,948
You do that.
457
00:19:10,016 --> 00:19:12,451
How the hell did
he ever get in my family?
458
00:19:14,421 --> 00:19:16,221
PAUL:
Hey, Rebecca?
459
00:19:16,289 --> 00:19:18,457
Yes?
Rumor has it
460
00:19:18,525 --> 00:19:20,592
you've, uh, slept
with every guy in the bar.
461
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:21,927
What?
462
00:19:22,062 --> 00:19:23,829
So, uh, how come
you haven't
463
00:19:23,897 --> 00:19:25,898
done the wild thing
with old Paul, huh?
464
00:19:30,370 --> 00:19:32,304
I never get included
in anything.
465
00:19:35,408 --> 00:19:37,209
CLIFF:
We're going to die out here.
466
00:19:37,277 --> 00:19:39,311
They're going to find
our bleached bones.
467
00:19:39,379 --> 00:19:41,480
Look, let's just
relax here, everybody.
468
00:19:41,548 --> 00:19:43,716
Everything's going
to seem better in the morning.
469
00:19:43,783 --> 00:19:45,317
Oh, yes, Sam.
470
00:19:45,385 --> 00:19:46,652
"In the morning."
471
00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:48,854
When the desert
sun comes up.
472
00:19:48,955 --> 00:19:51,890
By noon, it'll be 120!
473
00:19:52,025 --> 00:19:53,292
Forget it, Doc.
474
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,828
You're never going to see 120.
475
00:19:55,895 --> 00:19:58,664
At 110, your lungs explode.
476
00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:03,836
Cliff, that is ridiculous!
477
00:20:03,970 --> 00:20:05,471
Oh, yeah?
478
00:20:05,572 --> 00:20:07,172
Well, would you like
to make a friendly wager
479
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,575
on that?
480
00:20:09,642 --> 00:20:12,378
How many hours have
we got till sunup?
481
00:20:12,445 --> 00:20:15,280
About four, I'd say.
482
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,422
Well... I've lived
a good life.
483
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,425
The only thing I
484
00:20:26,493 --> 00:20:28,427
regret is I didn't get
a chance to say
485
00:20:28,495 --> 00:20:30,029
good-bye to Lilith
and Frederick,
486
00:20:30,096 --> 00:20:32,998
to tell them how
much I love them.
487
00:20:33,066 --> 00:20:35,167
Well, at least you've got
somebody
488
00:20:35,235 --> 00:20:36,802
to carry on your name, you know.
489
00:20:36,870 --> 00:20:38,404
I-I don't have anybody.
490
00:20:38,471 --> 00:20:40,939
If I die out here,
it's me dying alone.
491
00:20:42,175 --> 00:20:43,776
No, you're not, Sam.
You've got us.
492
00:20:47,213 --> 00:20:51,717
Ah... here we are wasting
away in the desert.
493
00:20:51,785 --> 00:20:54,119
I never pictured
that the four of us
494
00:20:54,187 --> 00:20:55,320
would go out like this.
495
00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:57,156
How did you picture it, Cliff?
496
00:20:59,959 --> 00:21:01,660
Well, I pictured, uh,
497
00:21:01,728 --> 00:21:03,962
Sammy getting topped
by a jealous husband.
498
00:21:05,298 --> 00:21:07,299
Norm, I figured you'd,
you know, heart attack.
499
00:21:10,503 --> 00:21:12,604
Frasier here...
500
00:21:12,672 --> 00:21:14,239
Cliff, I, I don't
want to hear it.
501
00:21:15,442 --> 00:21:16,709
You bet you don't.
502
00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:26,018
Oh, look at that.
503
00:21:26,086 --> 00:21:27,653
The sun's about
to come up.
504
00:21:27,721 --> 00:21:29,588
FRASIER:
Say, uh,
505
00:21:29,656 --> 00:21:31,390
where's, where's Norm?
Oh, he's asleep
506
00:21:31,458 --> 00:21:32,491
in the back here.
507
00:21:32,559 --> 00:21:33,926
Yeah? Well...
508
00:21:33,993 --> 00:21:35,427
well, he's not asleep anymore.
509
00:21:35,495 --> 00:21:37,062
Oh, hey, he's gone!
510
00:21:39,332 --> 00:21:41,266
Well, he's got to be
around here someplace.
511
00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:42,601
Norm!
Norm!
512
00:21:42,669 --> 00:21:44,003
Normie!
Norm!
513
00:21:44,170 --> 00:21:45,004
Normie!
Norm!
514
00:21:45,071 --> 00:21:47,006
Here, Norm!
515
00:21:47,073 --> 00:21:49,408
You, you don't suppose some wolf
516
00:21:49,476 --> 00:21:51,043
dragged him off
in the night, do you?
517
00:21:52,379 --> 00:21:54,546
Well, maybe we ought
to take a look for him.
518
00:21:54,614 --> 00:21:55,948
FRASIER:
Not me.
519
00:21:56,016 --> 00:21:59,084
I don't want to meet the wolf
that can drag off Norm.
520
00:22:01,321 --> 00:22:03,822
(horn toots)
521
00:22:03,890 --> 00:22:05,691
Norm!
Norm!
522
00:22:05,759 --> 00:22:06,959
Thank God you're safe!
523
00:22:07,027 --> 00:22:09,361
Yeah.
Where'd you
get this thing?
524
00:22:09,429 --> 00:22:11,196
It came complimentary
with the room.
525
00:22:11,297 --> 00:22:12,364
What room?
526
00:22:12,499 --> 00:22:13,432
At the resort.
527
00:22:13,633 --> 00:22:14,867
What resort?
528
00:22:14,934 --> 00:22:17,403
The resort just over the hill,
where I spent the night.
529
00:22:17,470 --> 00:22:19,104
You mean you
stayed in a resort
530
00:22:19,172 --> 00:22:20,839
while we slept here
in the dirt?!
531
00:22:20,907 --> 00:22:22,107
Why didn't you come
and tell us?
532
00:22:22,175 --> 00:22:24,276
How could you do
something like this?!
533
00:22:24,344 --> 00:22:25,678
You guys want to yell
at me some more,
534
00:22:25,745 --> 00:22:27,379
or do you want to make
the breakfast buffet?
535
00:22:27,447 --> 00:22:28,681
It stops in ten minutes.
536
00:22:28,748 --> 00:22:30,249
Well, naturally,
the buffet.
38763
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
