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1
00:00:05,300 --> 00:00:08,200
I can't believe
you've thrown it away.
2
00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:10,133
What about the
precious memories, Mom.
3
00:00:10,233 --> 00:00:11,700
Meg, I'm packing.
4
00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:13,100
I haven't really
got time for this.
5
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:16,133
What do you even want your
old school uniform for?
6
00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:17,400
School reunion.
7
00:00:17,500 --> 00:00:21,100
I was going to wear it
as a gag, obviously.
8
00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:22,667
An ice breaker.
9
00:00:22,767 --> 00:00:24,167
Gags are what I was known for.
10
00:00:24,267 --> 00:00:26,100
That and pissing myself.
11
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:28,167
Then I did you a favor, love.
12
00:00:28,267 --> 00:00:31,033
Nothing more attractive
than a fully grown woman
13
00:00:31,133 --> 00:00:32,167
in a school uniform.
14
00:00:32,267 --> 00:00:34,900
Think Google
would beg to differ.
15
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:37,233
So when are you
coming back exactly?
16
00:00:37,333 --> 00:00:38,033
Well--
17
00:00:38,133 --> 00:00:39,733
FRANK Where's the lube, Jen?
18
00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:44,600
Meg is here, Frank.
19
00:00:48,467 --> 00:00:49,667
Hi, Meg.
20
00:00:52,900 --> 00:00:55,567
The lube, you probably
heard me shout.
21
00:00:55,667 --> 00:01:00,333
That's lubricant for the
bikes for the weekend.
22
00:01:00,433 --> 00:01:01,400
What bikes?
23
00:01:01,500 --> 00:01:04,067
Mountain bikes.
24
00:01:04,167 --> 00:01:07,233
You don't have mountain bikes.
25
00:01:07,333 --> 00:01:08,333
No.
26
00:01:08,433 --> 00:01:11,500
No, we don't, but we're
going to hire some.
27
00:01:11,600 --> 00:01:14,567
BMX style we thought
would be best for us,
28
00:01:14,667 --> 00:01:16,833
and we thought we're
going to need a really
29
00:01:16,933 --> 00:01:19,167
reliable source of lubrication.
30
00:01:19,267 --> 00:01:20,633
So better safe than sorry.
31
00:01:20,733 --> 00:01:27,067
You never really can be too
careful, lubrication wise.
32
00:01:27,167 --> 00:01:29,067
Sorry I appear
to have wandered
33
00:01:29,167 --> 00:01:30,033
into a Freudian nightmare.
34
00:01:30,133 --> 00:01:33,000
[theme music]
35
00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:49,433
You all right?
36
00:01:49,533 --> 00:01:51,433
I am more than
all right, fella.
37
00:01:51,533 --> 00:01:54,600
Old Meggington here has
pulled an absolute blinder
38
00:01:54,700 --> 00:01:57,567
and made us all some
cold, hard cashish money.
39
00:01:57,667 --> 00:01:58,767
Oh.
40
00:01:58,867 --> 00:02:00,767
You finally give that guy
in the Kinko's a handy.
41
00:02:00,867 --> 00:02:02,033
Nope.
42
00:02:02,133 --> 00:02:04,900
I have subleted our
flat for the weekend.
43
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:07,267
You're welcome.
- Nice one, Meg.
44
00:02:07,367 --> 00:02:08,000
Cool.
45
00:02:08,100 --> 00:02:09,900
Wait, is that cool?
46
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,100
Where are we going to live?
47
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:12,967
Mom and Dad are away.
48
00:02:13,067 --> 00:02:13,900
Free house.
49
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:15,267
Boom.
50
00:02:15,367 --> 00:02:17,700
We are looking at a
weekend of peep-free baths,
51
00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:21,433
Baby Bell in the fridge,
and "Clueless" on VHS.
52
00:02:21,533 --> 00:02:24,033
We're going to turn up the
school reunion brunch looking
53
00:02:24,133 --> 00:02:25,900
so bloody rested,
they're going to think
54
00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,000
we're actually school girls.
55
00:02:27,100 --> 00:02:28,567
Yes.
56
00:02:28,667 --> 00:02:30,933
Look, nobody bloody cares much
about the stupid school reunion
57
00:02:31,033 --> 00:02:31,867
brunch.
58
00:02:31,967 --> 00:02:33,200
It's going to be shit.
59
00:02:33,300 --> 00:02:34,733
Everyone knows that
brunch is the worst meal.
60
00:02:34,833 --> 00:02:36,600
It's got booze, but
you're not allowed to get
61
00:02:36,700 --> 00:02:39,133
mega lush because it's morning.
62
00:02:39,233 --> 00:02:40,767
I like brunch.
63
00:02:40,867 --> 00:02:41,667
Of course, you do.
64
00:02:41,767 --> 00:02:43,000
You're posh.
65
00:02:43,100 --> 00:02:44,533
Laura, this is our
Romeo and Michelle moment.
66
00:02:44,633 --> 00:02:47,367
Time to show all these
bastards we've made it.
67
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:50,600
Show them we're the top of the
tree, the cream of the crop.
68
00:02:50,700 --> 00:02:51,500
How?
69
00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:53,633
By lying, mate.
70
00:02:53,733 --> 00:02:54,967
And looking shit hot.
71
00:02:55,067 --> 00:02:56,200
Foolproof.
72
00:02:56,300 --> 00:02:57,367
I don't care about
any of those pricks.
73
00:02:57,467 --> 00:02:58,933
They don't even
live here anymore.
74
00:02:59,033 --> 00:03:00,200
They've all moved to London.
75
00:03:00,300 --> 00:03:01,233
Traders.
76
00:03:01,333 --> 00:03:03,533
What's so special
about London anyway?
77
00:03:03,633 --> 00:03:04,900
London is for mocks.
78
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:06,767
It's expensive and shit.
79
00:03:06,867 --> 00:03:08,667
Will Johnson doesn't
live in London.
80
00:03:08,767 --> 00:03:09,833
He lives in Buenos Aires.
81
00:03:09,933 --> 00:03:11,033
Oh, here we go.
82
00:03:11,133 --> 00:03:12,433
He's a photographer now.
83
00:03:12,533 --> 00:03:15,133
He's got like so
many wish bracelets.
84
00:03:15,233 --> 00:03:17,167
I'm going to get him to
take my new head shots
85
00:03:17,267 --> 00:03:18,200
and fall in love with me.
86
00:03:18,300 --> 00:03:20,867
How are you going to do that?
87
00:03:20,967 --> 00:03:21,833
Yep, that will do it.
88
00:03:21,933 --> 00:03:23,933
We've got unfinished business.
89
00:03:24,033 --> 00:03:26,833
He was the first
boy to, you know,
90
00:03:26,933 --> 00:03:27,867
stick his fingers in the till.
91
00:03:27,967 --> 00:03:28,767
OK.
92
00:03:28,867 --> 00:03:29,700
Packing time.
93
00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:36,400
There's a bit of a
whiff from the fridge,
94
00:03:36,500 --> 00:03:38,233
but it's nothing to worry about.
95
00:03:38,333 --> 00:03:42,833
And that's a kettle for
your tea and what have you.
96
00:03:42,933 --> 00:03:44,400
Them's your curtains.
97
00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:45,500
That is a thong.
98
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,500
I'll move that.
99
00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:47,567
I don't like it, Mommy.
100
00:03:47,667 --> 00:03:48,833
It smells.
101
00:03:48,933 --> 00:03:51,300
We have to be here, pumpkin,
because your sister is
102
00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:54,100
graduating, and someone
forgot to book the Novotel
103
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:56,167
in January when I told him to.
104
00:03:56,267 --> 00:03:58,067
So this is the only place left.
105
00:03:58,167 --> 00:04:00,267
I mean, it just look like
a completely different
106
00:04:00,367 --> 00:04:01,500
flat from the photographs.
107
00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:03,033
Does it?
108
00:04:03,133 --> 00:04:05,067
That's weird.
109
00:04:05,167 --> 00:04:07,000
Well, enjoy.
110
00:04:07,100 --> 00:04:09,633
Oh, the toilet is a
little bit temperamental,
111
00:04:09,733 --> 00:04:14,033
so there's a coat hanger
in there for solids.
112
00:04:14,133 --> 00:04:16,467
Me casa su casa.
113
00:04:16,567 --> 00:04:17,867
Laters.
114
00:04:17,967 --> 00:04:18,767
Suckers.
115
00:04:24,033 --> 00:04:25,467
Dah, come on.
116
00:04:28,167 --> 00:04:29,000
It's weird.
117
00:04:29,100 --> 00:04:31,033
They key won't go in.
118
00:04:31,133 --> 00:04:32,133
I'll call Dad.
119
00:04:36,500 --> 00:04:38,133
All right, Meg.
120
00:04:38,233 --> 00:04:39,933
MEG: Hi, Dad.
121
00:04:40,033 --> 00:04:42,600
Hope you're having
a nice holiday.
122
00:04:42,700 --> 00:04:43,600
All it is--
123
00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:44,833
Yeah, your key doesn't work.
124
00:04:44,933 --> 00:04:46,067
Maybe.
125
00:04:46,167 --> 00:04:47,867
Yeah, we changed the locks.
126
00:04:47,967 --> 00:04:48,967
What?
Why?
127
00:04:49,067 --> 00:04:50,333
Well, to be
honest, mate, you do
128
00:04:50,433 --> 00:04:52,433
have a tendency to take
advantage when we're away,
129
00:04:52,533 --> 00:04:53,367
don't you?
130
00:04:53,467 --> 00:04:54,467
Go, Frank.
131
00:04:54,567 --> 00:04:57,067
I do not.
132
00:04:57,167 --> 00:05:00,633
Maybe this time, but I can't
believe you've done this.
133
00:05:00,733 --> 00:05:02,467
I'm going to have to sleep
on the street all day.
134
00:05:02,567 --> 00:05:03,600
I could get attacked.
135
00:05:03,700 --> 00:05:06,000
FRANK You're not going
to get attacked, Meg.
136
00:05:06,100 --> 00:05:08,167
You can't just turn
our house into a B&B.
137
00:05:08,267 --> 00:05:09,733
What's that matter
with your old flat?
138
00:05:09,833 --> 00:05:14,333
I've turned it
into a B&B. God.
139
00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:16,000
Am I too old to call Childline?
140
00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:17,500
It's actually really abusive.
141
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:18,433
Come on.
142
00:05:18,533 --> 00:05:19,433
Step aside.
143
00:05:19,533 --> 00:05:22,433
Laura to the rescue.
144
00:05:22,533 --> 00:05:24,967
Give me a bank card.
145
00:05:25,067 --> 00:05:26,067
I'll show you.
146
00:05:28,833 --> 00:05:30,900
Shit.
OK.
147
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:32,200
That didn't have any
money on it, did it?
148
00:05:32,300 --> 00:05:35,233
Yes, all of our
money from the Airbnb,
149
00:05:35,333 --> 00:05:36,967
and thus, all of our money.
150
00:05:37,067 --> 00:05:38,367
Shit-a-roma.
151
00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,067
Believe me, we would be
delighted to leave if there
152
00:05:45,167 --> 00:05:46,667
was anywhere else to go.
153
00:05:46,767 --> 00:05:47,767
You've already taken our money.
154
00:05:47,867 --> 00:05:48,967
No.
No.
155
00:05:49,067 --> 00:05:50,100
No.
No.
156
00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:52,033
Look, we're not
asking you to leave.
157
00:05:52,133 --> 00:05:53,567
And we thought we'd all
just stay here together.
158
00:05:53,667 --> 00:05:55,900
What are you going to do, curl
up at the bottom of the bed?
159
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:56,800
If you'd like.
160
00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:01,933
Look, we'll just
stay on the sofa.
161
00:06:02,033 --> 00:06:03,500
You won't even know we're here.
162
00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:05,767
You are already teetering on
the brink of a one-star rating,
163
00:06:05,867 --> 00:06:06,967
young lady.
164
00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:08,400
Why don't you stop
bothering us and go
165
00:06:08,500 --> 00:06:09,767
find some friend to stay with.
166
00:06:12,533 --> 00:06:14,000
How do you turn
on the television?
167
00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:16,733
Green button and AV-1.
168
00:06:16,833 --> 00:06:19,167
OK.
169
00:06:19,267 --> 00:06:22,000
So who are our other friends?
170
00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:27,833
Scott, fancy seeing you here.
171
00:06:27,933 --> 00:06:29,800
At my own front door.
172
00:06:29,900 --> 00:06:31,167
You joker.
173
00:06:31,267 --> 00:06:32,967
I'll cut to the chase, man.
174
00:06:33,067 --> 00:06:34,267
I know you're busy.
175
00:06:34,367 --> 00:06:37,500
I wondered, will you
keep me company tonight?
176
00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:38,967
I'm so young.
177
00:06:39,067 --> 00:06:39,900
Bunny.
178
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:41,000
She's gone rogue, Scott.
179
00:06:41,100 --> 00:06:41,933
Sorry.
180
00:06:42,033 --> 00:06:42,900
You can't do sexy baby.
181
00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:45,100
You're supposed to be a teen.
182
00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:46,900
You see, I've got a
client here who's just made
183
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,400
a very important breakthrough.
184
00:06:48,500 --> 00:06:49,600
What do you want?
185
00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:52,733
So we were just trying
to make some cashish money
186
00:06:52,833 --> 00:06:54,467
by subletting the old flat.
187
00:06:54,567 --> 00:06:57,600
And let me guess, you
got nowhere to stay.
188
00:06:57,700 --> 00:06:59,300
Just a bit.
189
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:02,633
A teensy touch on the
homeless side, yes.
190
00:07:02,733 --> 00:07:06,533
We were just taking advantage
trying to make a quick buck.
191
00:07:06,633 --> 00:07:09,400
You know how it is, Scott.
You're a psychologist.
192
00:07:09,500 --> 00:07:10,600
Right.
193
00:07:10,700 --> 00:07:12,467
Firstly, I'm a psychotherapist.
194
00:07:12,567 --> 00:07:13,567
Potato.
195
00:07:13,667 --> 00:07:14,667
Potato.
196
00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:17,100
Secondly, I only have
one bedroom, as you
197
00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:18,100
and Bunny well know.
198
00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:19,533
From the sex.
199
00:07:19,633 --> 00:07:23,200
And thirdly, every time
I spend any time with you,
200
00:07:23,300 --> 00:07:25,333
I end up having to
spend even more time
201
00:07:25,433 --> 00:07:27,367
with my own psychotherapist,
Dr. Francis.
202
00:07:27,467 --> 00:07:29,433
Maybe he's got
somewhere we can sleep.
203
00:07:33,067 --> 00:07:33,967
Right.
204
00:07:34,067 --> 00:07:35,267
Oh.
205
00:07:35,367 --> 00:07:37,033
Looks like it's an alley
raping for us tonight.
206
00:07:37,133 --> 00:07:39,367
Suppose outside, shall I?
207
00:07:48,933 --> 00:07:50,667
What are you doing,
Gary, share cocking?
208
00:07:50,767 --> 00:07:52,667
Put some pants on, mate.
209
00:07:52,767 --> 00:07:53,667
You've got company.
210
00:07:53,767 --> 00:07:57,667
Now is not a good time.
211
00:07:57,767 --> 00:07:59,100
You got someone in there?
212
00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:00,833
Have you got some slag in there?
213
00:08:00,933 --> 00:08:02,067
Get out the way.
214
00:08:02,167 --> 00:08:03,267
Let me fucking see her.
215
00:08:03,367 --> 00:08:04,400
I'm not having this, Gary.
216
00:08:07,833 --> 00:08:11,233
What the hell?
217
00:08:11,333 --> 00:08:12,833
This is how we die.
218
00:08:12,933 --> 00:08:15,267
Holt. It is the
evil temptress,
219
00:08:15,367 --> 00:08:17,467
the whore of Theron, Laura.
220
00:08:17,567 --> 00:08:20,433
How does this crushed velvet
slag know my name, Gary?
221
00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:21,367
What's going on?
222
00:08:21,467 --> 00:08:22,533
It's my guild.
223
00:08:22,633 --> 00:08:23,800
We've decided to [inaudible]
at IRL for a bit.
224
00:08:23,900 --> 00:08:25,600
- What?
- Me guild.
225
00:08:25,700 --> 00:08:27,833
They've been helping me
through a tough time.
226
00:08:27,933 --> 00:08:29,300
What kind of tough time?
227
00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:30,467
Did your mom finally die?
228
00:08:30,567 --> 00:08:31,800
Did you get that
Princess Diana plate?
229
00:08:31,900 --> 00:08:33,000
Can I have it?
- No, Laura.
230
00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:34,767
A difficult breakup.
231
00:08:34,867 --> 00:08:38,033
Well, You're not going
get over it mincing around
232
00:08:38,133 --> 00:08:39,633
with these goblins, are you?
233
00:08:39,733 --> 00:08:40,900
Tell them to bugger off.
234
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:42,100
We need somewhere to sleep.
235
00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:46,267
No.
236
00:08:46,367 --> 00:08:47,000
What?
237
00:08:47,100 --> 00:08:49,433
No, Laura.
238
00:08:49,533 --> 00:08:54,667
You can stay, but if you
do, you have to participate.
239
00:08:54,767 --> 00:08:55,900
All of you.
240
00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:57,067
Jesus Christ.
241
00:08:57,167 --> 00:09:01,433
Let's just get this
over with then.
242
00:09:01,533 --> 00:09:05,067
You may proceed
to cross the bridge.
243
00:09:05,167 --> 00:09:06,300
What do you mean the bridge.
244
00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:07,500
I though we were in the castle?
245
00:09:07,600 --> 00:09:09,533
God, keep up, Meg.
246
00:09:09,633 --> 00:09:11,900
The bridge troll has
just granted us our wish.
247
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:12,933
Which one's the bridge troll?
248
00:09:13,033 --> 00:09:14,567
You called, my lady?
249
00:09:14,667 --> 00:09:17,733
Well, I wish to go to
the Magic Kingdom, a.k.a.
250
00:09:17,833 --> 00:09:18,667
bed.
251
00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:19,967
Nice try.
252
00:09:20,067 --> 00:09:22,067
But playing standard Gert rules.
253
00:09:22,167 --> 00:09:24,000
Not that you get that.
254
00:09:24,100 --> 00:09:25,867
Lightning ball, past 10.
255
00:09:25,967 --> 00:09:28,733
Amulet fears belt,
lightning bolt reversed.
256
00:09:34,700 --> 00:09:36,567
You've killed her.
257
00:09:40,033 --> 00:09:41,067
Oh.
258
00:09:46,300 --> 00:09:48,400
Well, I didn't mean
to kill her, did I?
259
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,567
How did you know
how to do that?
260
00:09:53,833 --> 00:09:55,533
Are you a secret LARPer?
261
00:09:55,633 --> 00:09:56,433
No.
262
00:09:56,533 --> 00:09:57,733
Oh, my god.
263
00:09:57,833 --> 00:09:59,867
I just-- oh, fuck off, Meg.
264
00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:01,467
Tell it the
bridge troll, mate.
265
00:10:01,567 --> 00:10:02,833
No.
266
00:10:02,933 --> 00:10:04,133
Oh, come on, Laura.
267
00:10:04,233 --> 00:10:05,600
It's only a joke.
268
00:10:05,700 --> 00:10:07,133
Get out.
269
00:10:12,433 --> 00:10:13,733
OK, guys.
270
00:10:13,833 --> 00:10:15,533
You know I'm all for a jag, but
it's actually quite cold now,
271
00:10:15,633 --> 00:10:17,167
and I want to look good
for the union tomorrow.
272
00:10:17,267 --> 00:10:18,700
Yeah, well, what
do you suggest?
273
00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:20,100
We walked out of the flat.
274
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,500
We've run out of friends
plus we've got 14 pounds
275
00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:24,900
35 between us.
276
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:25,800
30, 35.
277
00:10:25,900 --> 00:10:26,733
[inaudible]
278
00:10:26,833 --> 00:10:27,900
When?
279
00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:32,233
Girls, let Mommy
take care of this.
280
00:10:32,333 --> 00:10:33,767
We're going to put on
tomorrow's glad rags,
281
00:10:33,867 --> 00:10:37,167
taunt ourselves up, go to
the hottest bar in town,
282
00:10:37,267 --> 00:10:39,700
find some totty, and then
we'll go home with them.
283
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:41,400
So prostitute ourselves?
284
00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:42,933
No.
285
00:10:43,033 --> 00:10:44,833
We're not going to have
sex with them, silly.
286
00:10:44,933 --> 00:10:47,233
We'll pretend that we might just
till we get to someone's flat,
287
00:10:47,333 --> 00:10:48,300
and we'll crash there.
288
00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:49,667
Good plan.
289
00:10:49,767 --> 00:10:51,433
Sounds a bit risky.
290
00:10:51,533 --> 00:10:53,233
Exactly.
291
00:10:53,333 --> 00:10:54,600
If you got it, flaunt it.
292
00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:56,100
Not woman.
293
00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:58,400
No offense, Meg, but what
have your morals ever got you?
294
00:11:13,900 --> 00:11:15,600
Whoa.
295
00:11:15,700 --> 00:11:16,900
You two are fine.
296
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:20,000
But this ain't happening.
297
00:11:20,100 --> 00:11:24,833
Well, I can take
my blazer off.
298
00:11:24,933 --> 00:11:25,800
Pub?
299
00:11:35,367 --> 00:11:36,633
Jesus.
300
00:11:36,733 --> 00:11:39,500
I mean, a lot of these people
do look like serial killers.
301
00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:41,700
And we're not leaving till
one of them takes us home.
302
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:44,867
I think my outfit is going to
invite the wrong kind of man.
303
00:11:44,967 --> 00:11:48,367
Meg, your outfit is
inviting no kind of man.
304
00:11:48,467 --> 00:11:50,467
Let's face it, Laura,
this one's on us.
305
00:11:50,567 --> 00:11:51,333
Right.
306
00:11:51,433 --> 00:11:52,767
Let's get this party started.
307
00:12:24,900 --> 00:12:28,433
(SINGING) I don't
need anybody--
308
00:12:28,533 --> 00:12:31,333
Night time.
309
00:12:31,433 --> 00:12:33,133
Oh, bogs.
310
00:12:33,233 --> 00:12:34,867
Time to go, girls.
311
00:12:34,967 --> 00:12:36,667
[sighing]
312
00:12:55,533 --> 00:12:57,400
Good night, mate.
313
00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:07,633
What the hell is going on?
314
00:13:07,733 --> 00:13:08,633
I can see you.
315
00:13:13,067 --> 00:13:14,833
Which input is the DVD on?
316
00:13:14,933 --> 00:13:18,733
AB-2 select DVD from the menu.
317
00:13:18,833 --> 00:13:22,767
I mean, Doper Road is nice.
318
00:13:22,867 --> 00:13:25,233
It is nice, but do
you think there's
319
00:13:25,333 --> 00:13:27,367
like a park we could sleep in?
320
00:13:27,467 --> 00:13:28,900
God, you don't want
to sleep in a park, Meg.
321
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,800
That's a number one rule, not
unless you want a pillow that's
322
00:13:31,900 --> 00:13:33,500
made of Johnny's and dog shit.
323
00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:35,367
We just need to
find somewhere posh,
324
00:13:35,467 --> 00:13:38,567
like a round-about flower bed.
325
00:13:38,667 --> 00:13:39,467
Or--
326
00:13:48,167 --> 00:13:50,467
This will do.
327
00:13:50,567 --> 00:13:54,967
This is six hours beauty
sleep before brunch.
328
00:13:55,067 --> 00:13:56,233
[inaudible] a beefer.
329
00:14:02,733 --> 00:14:04,033
Oy!
330
00:14:04,133 --> 00:14:06,033
Oh, my god!
331
00:14:06,133 --> 00:14:07,033
What are you doing?
332
00:14:07,133 --> 00:14:09,600
[screaming]
333
00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:13,600
Ay!
334
00:14:13,700 --> 00:14:16,567
[screaming]
335
00:14:23,067 --> 00:14:24,567
Has he gone?
336
00:14:24,667 --> 00:14:27,033
Oh, it's too soft.
337
00:14:27,133 --> 00:14:28,467
This is like a beach.
338
00:14:28,567 --> 00:14:31,667
Let's just wait here a
minute until the coast clears.
339
00:14:49,733 --> 00:14:50,533
Ow!
340
00:15:00,533 --> 00:15:02,833
Excuse me!
341
00:15:02,933 --> 00:15:04,400
Cease fire!
342
00:15:04,500 --> 00:15:05,400
Cease fire!
343
00:15:09,467 --> 00:15:11,267
Good god.
344
00:15:14,700 --> 00:15:16,267
Is it bad?
345
00:15:19,100 --> 00:15:21,333
What the hell
is going on here?
346
00:15:26,133 --> 00:15:27,433
LAURA: Where are you taking us?
347
00:15:27,533 --> 00:15:29,433
GOLF PLAYER: I'm escorting
you off the premises.
348
00:15:29,533 --> 00:15:30,200
LAURA: Water.
349
00:15:30,300 --> 00:15:31,367
GOLF PLAYER: Hey!
350
00:15:31,467 --> 00:15:32,100
Hey!
351
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,300
LAURA: I need water.
352
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,267
GOLF PLAYER: Hey,
what are you doing?
353
00:15:35,367 --> 00:15:36,633
Get yourself back here.
354
00:15:36,733 --> 00:15:38,100
LAURA: No, I need a drink.
GOLF PLAYER: Come here.
355
00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:39,133
LAURA: I'm allowed it.
GOLF PLAYER: Come here.
356
00:15:39,233 --> 00:15:40,400
LAURA: You can't stop me.
357
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:41,567
GOLF PLAYER: This is
why women should never
358
00:15:41,667 --> 00:15:42,700
be allowed on golf courses.
359
00:15:45,467 --> 00:15:47,633
MEG: I really don't think
this is a good idea.
360
00:15:47,733 --> 00:15:48,767
Oh, come.
361
00:15:48,867 --> 00:15:50,200
I am not missing
out on Will Johnson.
362
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:52,733
I don't look brunch
appropriate, Bunny.
363
00:15:52,833 --> 00:15:54,033
BUNNY: You promised.
364
00:15:54,133 --> 00:15:55,333
What about showing
people the we've made it?
365
00:15:55,433 --> 00:15:56,967
Will won't be
doing that though.
366
00:15:57,067 --> 00:15:58,967
Someone might be able
to have us to stay.
367
00:15:59,067 --> 00:16:01,033
They might have a hotel room.
368
00:16:01,133 --> 00:16:02,367
Oh, come on.
Please.
369
00:16:02,467 --> 00:16:03,733
Please.
Please.
370
00:16:03,833 --> 00:16:04,967
I can seduce Will Johnson.
371
00:16:05,067 --> 00:16:07,300
He's got to have a
bed for us, hasn't he?
372
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:10,200
I mean, we do need to find
somewhere to sleep tonight.
373
00:16:10,300 --> 00:16:12,800
These guys don't really care
what we look like, will they?
374
00:16:12,900 --> 00:16:13,733
Nah.
375
00:16:13,833 --> 00:16:15,067
They're all school mates.
376
00:16:15,167 --> 00:16:16,600
We go way back.
377
00:16:16,700 --> 00:16:20,300
They've seen us when we
looked worse than this.
378
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:23,900
As I will be saying to
Will Johnson later tonight,
379
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,967
it's what's inside that counts.
380
00:16:26,067 --> 00:16:27,167
Inside my vagina.
381
00:16:34,733 --> 00:16:37,000
Oh, god.
382
00:16:37,100 --> 00:16:41,867
You did want to make
an entrance, didn't you?
383
00:16:41,967 --> 00:16:44,767
OK, look, we just
need to find a bed,
384
00:16:44,867 --> 00:16:48,333
even if it means going home
with Mr. Pillsgate, caretaker.
385
00:16:48,433 --> 00:16:50,400
I think we're about
old for him now.
386
00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:57,467
There he is.
387
00:16:57,567 --> 00:16:58,633
How do I look?
388
00:16:58,733 --> 00:16:59,900
5 out of 10.
389
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:01,267
My 5 is you're nice.
390
00:17:01,367 --> 00:17:02,233
That's OK.
391
00:17:02,333 --> 00:17:04,333
You don't smell
great though, mate.
392
00:17:04,433 --> 00:17:06,900
Have you got any
perfume on you?
393
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:07,833
No.
394
00:17:07,933 --> 00:17:08,833
Right.
395
00:17:08,933 --> 00:17:10,400
Well, is anyone looking for it?
396
00:17:15,167 --> 00:17:17,633
My knickers are full of sand.
397
00:17:17,733 --> 00:17:21,467
What are you doing?
398
00:17:21,567 --> 00:17:23,900
It's my family perfume.
399
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,333
It's pheromones.
400
00:17:25,433 --> 00:17:26,667
Drives men wild.
401
00:17:26,767 --> 00:17:28,767
It's science, Meg.
402
00:17:28,867 --> 00:17:30,500
Is it?
403
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:33,367
Professor Stephen Hawking would
call that science, would he?
404
00:17:33,467 --> 00:17:34,267
No, a fact.
405
00:17:34,367 --> 00:17:35,333
I read it on the internet.
406
00:17:35,433 --> 00:17:36,567
Right.
407
00:17:36,667 --> 00:17:37,667
Wish me luck.
408
00:17:44,633 --> 00:17:47,500
I got a hefty bonus, which
Marvin could have been it.
409
00:17:51,067 --> 00:17:52,400
Oh, my god.
410
00:17:52,500 --> 00:17:53,300
Laura.
411
00:17:53,400 --> 00:17:54,467
Wow.
412
00:17:54,567 --> 00:17:55,400
You look--
- Yeah.
413
00:17:55,500 --> 00:17:56,133
I know.
414
00:17:56,233 --> 00:17:57,367
Time has been good to me.
415
00:17:57,467 --> 00:17:59,567
So any of you has
got a spare bedroom?
416
00:17:59,667 --> 00:18:00,467
What?
417
00:18:00,567 --> 00:18:02,067
Staff interest.
418
00:18:02,167 --> 00:18:05,433
Well, I mean, we all have
guest rooms, of course.
419
00:18:05,533 --> 00:18:06,300
Right.
420
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:07,800
I need somewhere
to stay tonight.
421
00:18:07,900 --> 00:18:12,967
Oh, well, I suppose you
could stay with me in Camden.
422
00:18:13,067 --> 00:18:13,900
What?
423
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:15,967
Camden in London.
424
00:18:16,067 --> 00:18:18,067
London.
425
00:18:18,167 --> 00:18:19,867
What a shithole.
How about you, then?
426
00:18:19,967 --> 00:18:21,467
- I live in London.
- You?
427
00:18:21,567 --> 00:18:22,233
Me too.
428
00:18:22,333 --> 00:18:23,767
Absolute time wasters.
429
00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:31,667
[laughter]
430
00:18:34,733 --> 00:18:35,700
Hi, guys.
431
00:18:38,267 --> 00:18:39,667
Jeremy, how are you?
432
00:18:39,767 --> 00:18:41,733
Fine.
433
00:18:41,833 --> 00:18:42,800
Sorry, who are you?
434
00:18:42,900 --> 00:18:44,533
Classic, Jeremy.
435
00:18:44,633 --> 00:18:46,433
Class clown.
436
00:18:46,533 --> 00:18:49,667
You know me.
437
00:18:49,767 --> 00:18:50,633
What?
438
00:18:50,733 --> 00:18:52,400
Seriously.
No one?
439
00:18:52,500 --> 00:18:53,400
It's me.
440
00:18:53,500 --> 00:18:54,967
Meg.
441
00:18:55,067 --> 00:18:58,533
We were in school
together for seven years.
442
00:18:58,633 --> 00:19:03,200
I went on holiday
with your family, Amy.
443
00:19:03,300 --> 00:19:04,333
Right.
444
00:19:04,433 --> 00:19:08,533
Well, that was a blow
for the old self esteem.
445
00:19:08,633 --> 00:19:11,267
No mind.
446
00:19:11,367 --> 00:19:12,767
What are you guys all up too?
447
00:19:12,867 --> 00:19:14,800
Well, I'm a human
rights lawyer.
448
00:19:14,900 --> 00:19:16,433
It was between that or modeling.
449
00:19:16,533 --> 00:19:18,067
And I'm a dentist.
450
00:19:18,167 --> 00:19:19,200
Alex here was just
telling us how
451
00:19:19,300 --> 00:19:20,333
he's built an orphanage in--
452
00:19:20,433 --> 00:19:21,133
Yes.
453
00:19:21,233 --> 00:19:23,333
Sorry, did you say dentist?
454
00:19:23,433 --> 00:19:25,900
Would you mind having
a look at my tooth?
455
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:27,733
It just came loose.
456
00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:30,533
I got hit by a
golf ball earlier.
457
00:19:30,633 --> 00:19:33,533
So where are you
staying tonight, Jeremy?
458
00:19:33,633 --> 00:19:36,700
And I swear that lion
just knew me, you know?
459
00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:39,300
He just like got
me in a way that I
460
00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:41,333
guess a woman never could.
461
00:19:44,133 --> 00:19:45,567
What's that smell?
462
00:19:45,667 --> 00:19:46,933
Guilty.
463
00:19:47,033 --> 00:19:47,933
Ah.
464
00:19:48,033 --> 00:19:50,467
I knew you'd remember.
465
00:19:50,567 --> 00:19:51,833
Yeah.
466
00:19:51,933 --> 00:19:53,367
Right.
467
00:19:53,467 --> 00:19:57,000
Anyway, the thing you need to
remember about wild beasts--
468
00:19:57,100 --> 00:19:58,633
I feel sleepy.
469
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:02,800
Yeah?
470
00:20:02,900 --> 00:20:04,633
Oh, sexy baby.
471
00:20:04,733 --> 00:20:08,267
There's no competing with that.
472
00:20:08,367 --> 00:20:13,167
So maybe we should go
somewhere a little bit quieter,
473
00:20:13,267 --> 00:20:15,733
like your hotel room, say?
474
00:20:15,833 --> 00:20:17,533
I don't have a hotel room.
475
00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:20,733
I'm getting a plane back
to Buenos Aires tonight.
476
00:20:20,833 --> 00:20:26,300
But I think I know somewhere
we can go to catch up.
477
00:20:31,867 --> 00:20:34,233
I'm so tired, Laura.
478
00:20:34,333 --> 00:20:36,200
I think I'm hallucinating.
479
00:20:36,300 --> 00:20:38,000
I just need sleep.
480
00:20:38,100 --> 00:20:39,933
There's only one thing for it.
481
00:20:40,033 --> 00:20:41,167
You're going home
with Mr. Pillsgate.
482
00:20:41,267 --> 00:20:42,933
I'm getting out
the begging bowl.
483
00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:44,367
Don't do it, Meg.
484
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:49,433
Hey.
485
00:20:55,333 --> 00:20:56,167
Hey.
486
00:20:59,533 --> 00:21:01,600
Thank you.
487
00:21:01,700 --> 00:21:03,633
So you all remember me.
488
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:07,567
I'm Meg.
489
00:21:07,667 --> 00:21:09,300
I'm Meg.
490
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:12,600
I pissed my pants on the
school trip to Cheddar Gorge.
491
00:21:12,700 --> 00:21:14,000
(ALL) Oh.
492
00:21:14,100 --> 00:21:16,000
Right.
Yeah.
493
00:21:16,100 --> 00:21:19,700
All is it's a funny
story, really.
494
00:21:22,467 --> 00:21:26,300
I'm in a little bit of a pickle.
495
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:29,067
And I need somewhere
to stay tonight.
496
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:33,433
Oh.
497
00:21:33,533 --> 00:21:34,567
Oh.
498
00:21:34,667 --> 00:21:36,233
Oh.
499
00:21:36,333 --> 00:21:37,200
Ow.
500
00:21:37,300 --> 00:21:37,967
Wait.
501
00:21:38,067 --> 00:21:40,033
Is there sand up there?
502
00:21:40,133 --> 00:21:42,967
It's not very-- can
you stop wriggling.
503
00:21:43,067 --> 00:21:44,567
You neither.
504
00:21:44,667 --> 00:21:45,467
Oh, it hurts.
505
00:21:45,567 --> 00:21:47,233
Oh, god.
506
00:21:47,333 --> 00:21:52,433
Well, I guess I was
just trying to impress you
507
00:21:52,533 --> 00:21:54,000
all, really.
508
00:21:54,100 --> 00:21:56,567
I'm a woman of means.
509
00:21:56,667 --> 00:21:59,567
I'm living the dream.
510
00:21:59,667 --> 00:22:01,300
Oh, no.
511
00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:02,700
Oh.
512
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:04,733
[gasping]
513
00:22:05,833 --> 00:22:07,633
Look, my tooth has come off.
514
00:22:11,100 --> 00:22:13,567
Don't look at me.
515
00:22:13,667 --> 00:22:14,567
I want to help.
516
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:16,933
Come on.
517
00:22:17,033 --> 00:22:17,933
Ah!
518
00:22:18,033 --> 00:22:19,900
Please stop, Bunny!
519
00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,467
Your vagina is like sandpaper.
520
00:22:22,567 --> 00:22:23,467
Oh!
521
00:22:23,567 --> 00:22:26,000
[orgasm-ing]
522
00:22:35,667 --> 00:22:41,067
So does anyone
would have us to stay?
523
00:22:44,667 --> 00:22:45,500
Anyone?
524
00:22:56,667 --> 00:22:59,600
[theme music]
34157
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